The Stone Ones

by little big pony

Rating: mature
Tags: Gore, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Other, Adventure, Sex, Violence, Dark, Human
Length: 80537

3 super power war machines in human form are awoken from their slumber

They helped save everything that they now know.
They sacrificed everything.
They were trapped.

The Forger

The Reaper

The Flyer

And now they are free.....

It'll be darker in later chapters.

I got some new editors, my boys Invisible Blade and Thardoc

Ladies, they're single ;)

Published 2012-11-14 05:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2013-09-03 23:59:04 UTC

Ch.1 The awakening

It was this year’s Grand Galloping Gala and Applejack, Twilight Sparkle, Fluttershy, Rarity, Rainbow Dash, and Pinkie Pie were invited again to make it, as princess Celestia said, "More interesting". A lot of the nobles weren't coming this year because they heard that those six crazy ponies that ruined the last one were coming, so instead of the usual snotty crowd the princesses were able to invite the common ponies, something that has never happened in the history Gala.

Celestia smiled as she looked out of her balcony, watching her little ponies as they set everything up for the party tonight. It looked like this was going to be the best grand galloping gala anyone's ever seen.... Or at least better for the monarch, who usually had to spend the night greeting ponies instead of having fun. I hope they have that game of hoof ball in the garden.... Celestia thought to herself, chuckling as she heard her door open, it was her sister and co-ruler, Luna.

“Are you sure we have to come tonight sister?" Luna asked her sister, she was still shy around all of her subjects and Celestia had demanded that she come.

“Yes sister" Celestia said, putting a hoof around her sister to comfort her. “You need to meet some ponies Lulu. There might even be a game of hoof ball." Luna's eyes sparked with determination, she loved hoof ball. Both looked over the gardens, Luna's gaze drifted to 3 statues in the gardens that stood out with all of the others. Celestia saw where sisters gaze went and she put a wing around her.

“I miss them too, Lulu.”

“We wish they were still alive Tia, most ponies don't even know they existed anymore." Celestia looked down at her sister.

“It’s what they would have wanted sister."

Later that night.....

“Applebloom, ya can't help me sell anything, go an look around with the other crusaders okay? “Applejack told her sister. She had set her stand, hopping that with the new crowd she would be able to sell her apple and apple acessories . Because none of the 'fancy ponies' as she called them were coming to the party she was able to take her sister and the other 2 crusaders with her, something she was now regretting, deeply, deeply regretting.

“Come on ,Applejack" Her sister whined. “I’ah can help ya; I'ah even sold that pie ta that one pony."

“Ya kept harassing him till he threw some bits at ya."

"We still got the money." Applejack looked down at her sister.

“I’ah said no." Applebloom looked at her sister and gave her the standard Applebloom weapons grade puppy dog eyes. Unfortunately for her Applejack had built up a resistance to it.

“Go play with yer friends."

Applebloom sighed and went to look for her friends. She went to look for Scottaloo first because she knew where she would be, where ever her hero, role model, god, Rainbow Dash was. She trotted to the big opening in the middle of the garden where the ponies were having a game to hoofball. Sure enough, Scoots was on the sidelines cheering Rainbow Dash, watching the cyan pony with something along the lines of religiuos devotion in her eyes. The earth pony trotted up to her friend and tapped her on the shoulder. Scoots waved her away, her eyes glued on Dash. After a few minutes of her poking Scoots snapped.

“WHAT?"

Applebloom giggled." I'm bored, let’s go get Sweete and go see if we can get our cuitemarks." Scootaloo looked from her to Dash and groaned, as much as she wanted to watch Dash she was a cuitemarks crusader first.

“Fine let’s go get-" They saw Rarity using her magic to carry Sweete toward them, an almost crazed look in her twitching eyes. “Look your friends are here ,Sweete. Play with them, Chao!" Rarity said before she dumped her on the ground and running back to the party.

The other fillies looked at their friend as she dusted herself off. "Don't ask." Sweete said and the girls shrugged.

“Hay ya want ta try ta get our cuitemarks."? Applebloom. The girls nodded and they struck poses.

“CUTIEMARK CRUSADERS YA!" They yelled as they ran into the thick of the party.....

An hour later......

After several failed attempts at getting cuitemarks, two of them causing property damage, the girls got bored and were now playing tag around the statues, each hoping to get their cutiemarks in tag. (author takes a swig of Daniels)

“I’m going ta get ya, Sweete Belle" Applebloom yelled at her friend as she tried to evade her by weaving around some statues. Sweete Belle was giving it her all but Applebloom was gaining. She looked back to see if her friend was closer to her when she hit something solid, knocking her to the ground. Applebloom and Scoots went to see if their friend was okay. “Ya okay, Sweetie Belle?" Applebloom asked as Sweete rubbed her head.

"I'm fine girls I just hit-" They all looked up at the statue to see one of the weirdest things that they had ever seen, 3 things in fact.

“What are those things?"

“Why are they so scary?"

“Puff, Rainbow Dash is way cooler than that!"

The 3 fillies looked at each other. Child’s curiosity was starting to overtake them and they wanted to know what these odd looking creature were. They needed to find the smartest pony they knew so she could tell them what these things were. They ran inside of the castle, knocking ponies over in their haste to find Twilight Sparkle....

Twilight was happy as she could be. She had much more time to spend with her teacher, princess Celestia. She was even telling her how her studies were going, much to the princesses private horror. “Then that when-" Twilight began as she got tackled by 3 fillies, those fillies being Scottaloo, Sweete Belle, and Applebloom. They all started to talk at the same time, frazzling the unicorn, much to Celestia's amusement.

“Girls" Celestia said, trying to save her student “Why doesn't just one of you tell Twilight what’s the matter."

The fillies looked up at the princess and nodded at each other, seeing that Celestia's idea was sound. “Twilight, you need to come look at these weird statues." Scottaloo said as Luna walked up to the group, coming back from a practically difficult hoofball game.

“What’s going on?" She asked her sister.

Celestia grinned and said," Twilight was just about to go with these fillies to see ' these weird statues' and I was about to go with them, I want to see what they are so worked up about."

Twilight looked like she was about to die of embarrassment and the princesses had to stop themselves from chuckling as the fillies excitedly dragged her toward the statues. Luna followed, both out of boredom and curiosity. Fluttershy, Rarity, Applejack, Pinkie Pie, and Rainbow Dash saw them and followed, each of them wondering if something was wrong.

The excited fillies let the group to 3 statues. “See?" They said and the girls looked up and the 6 mares saw the strangest creatures that they had ever seen.

“Princess" Twilight said “What are those things?" What the girls saw baffled them. The 3 statues were 3 creatures like nothing they had ever seen. The stood on 2 legs like a monkey or diamond dog. They couldn't see the faces of 2 of the and ones face was half covered in a hood.

Celestia looked at the statues then to the girls. “Those girls are humans."

“But humans don't exist; they're an old mare’s tale." Twilight said, looking up at the statues.

Luna huffed, “They were real and they were our friends." The girls looked at her.

“Y-you knew them? W-what h-happened to them?" Fluttershy asked, cowering behind the other girls, terrified of the statues. Luna looked up at the statues sadly.

“They came during Discords reign by our father. He summoned them to help us battle Discord and his allies. There were 5 of them and they died during our final battle with discord and his generals, my sister had these stautes to remember them." Luna sadly said. Dash flew up and looked at the statues.

“They don't look so tough!" She said making Luna chuckle.

“They fought and slew hydras easily; Forger could beat a manticore to death with his bare hands." The girls looked at the statues in wonder.

“What were their names and why do they have those horrid symbols on their armor?!" Rarity asked.

Celestia walked to one of the statues. The human was covered in plate and mail from head to toe and was carrying a big shield on its right arm and a long sword at its belt. It had a pot helm carved to look like a grinning skull in the front. The girls also noticed that its arms and chest was were very large. “That is Forger."

She walked to the next one. This one was covered in fancy cloths instead of armor and had a hood covering its face. Its arms were covered in these ordinate arm guards and it was smaller in stature. “This is Reaper."

The next on was in chainmail and had some funny pointed shoes on its feet and it was the smallest of the 3. On its belt was a wicked looking knife and it had a smile on its face. Its weapon was a bow that was on its back with a quiver full of arrows. The symbol on each of the statues chest was a skull that was grinning. “And this is Longstrider, the fastest thing in Equestria." Rainbow puffed out her chest but said nothing.

Celestia turned to the group. “They were the shock troops in our army all of those years ago. They called themselves the Thanes. That symbol was their units mark and they used it to scare their enemy’s in battle" All of the girls started to ask questions but Celestia cut them off. “No more questions girls, let’s go play some hoofball." None of the girls looked happy but they complied, turning around and walking to where the game was going on. Luna stayed behind with tears in her eyes. Touching the Forgers statue she turned around and followed....

“You ready to lose, Aj?" Dash asked as they waited for the ref to drop the ball. Applejack ignored her and waited for the ball to hit the ground. Get ready ta lose Dash She thought as the ball dropped. After a brief struggle with the ball Aj won the ball and ran down to the field to the goal, which Pinkie was guarding.

Faking out each pony that got in her way she go in position to buck the ball, Dash not far behind her. Bringing her powerful back legs back she used as much power to buck the ball that she used to buck her apple trees. She sensed that a goal was near when Dash bumped into her, knocking the ball off its course. “Bang it Dash!" she yelled at her friend as they watched the ball fly past the goal and knocking into one of the statues, specifically the Forgers statue.

They watched on horror as the statue cracked. “Look at what ya made me d-" She stopped, every pony looked at the statue in horror. The statue was glowing blue, cracks shooting all over it.

Twilight looked at her teacher and what she saw scared her. Luna had a look of disbelief on her face. Celestia though, had the look of fear on her face. Why is she so- She thought when the statue fell to the ground.

NoNONO! Celestia thought as the statue fell to the ground. She hoped that what she thought was happening wasn't happening.

Luna looked at the statue, then at her sister. She knew that glow anywhere. Tia said that they had died....

Aj watched as the statue hit the ground but instead of shattering on the floor something happened. Instead of a statue it was a living thing. It was on its hands and knees and it was breathing heavily. It looked like it had just fought a major battle, its dull grey armor cut up and it was bleeding through the joints in its armor. The oddest thing was that its eyes had a blue glow to them; she could even see them from where she was. It threw off its helmet and looked up and they all got a good look at its face.

It had a short mane and it had the beginnings of a beard, a look of happiness on its scared face. It looked male to her best guess. He got up and started to move around; all of the ponies heard its bones cracking. Looking around the garden his eyes fell on the scared looking Celestia. His face turned from happiness to anger. Aj flinched, she never seen anything look so angry before.

Forger looked across the garden yard to Celestia. He was finally free! After 2000 years of wrongful imprisonment. After all he did for that fucking princess, after all they did... But now he was free. Now he and his would get with they deserved. Forger looked Celestia in the eyes and roared,” TIA, I"M GOING TO TURN YOU TO FUCKING GLUE!"............

Ch.2 Greetings

The first thing that Forge noticed now that he wasn't a statue was how much bigger ponies had gotten. 2000 years ago the ponies barely reached his belly button, now he was only about 3 feet taller than most of them and the guards around the garden probably went to his lower chest. Speaking of guards, none of them looked happy that he said he was going to turn Tia into glue. In fact, one of the unicorns had his horn charged and aimed at him.

Forge ignored the stallion, chuckling to himself, and took his shield off his arm. I've waited 2000 years to do that He thought as he loosened the straps that held his chest plate together, the said piece of armor falling to the ground with a solid thud.

His gauntlets and leg guards were next to go. Then finally his uncomfortable steel boots, leaving him with only his mail and some shorts and his sword on him. He looked his body over and saw that it still retained the wounds from that battle with Discord. After I'm done with Tia I should get these looked at. He thought as he made his way to where the princesses were standing still looking dumbstruck. The unicorn that had his horn charged apparently didn't like that.

“STOP BEAST!" He roared to Forge as he released a beam of magic right at him....

Shining armor was furious. A monster had threatened his in-law and princess. The beast was dressed for war so he charged his horn to get ready to stop the creature, who just looked at him and started to strip off its armor. Shining watched with growing anger as the creature took off the last of its armor, leaving nothing but chainmail and something covering its lower body and its sword.

The creature saw him as so little a threat that it would take off its protection? Shining’s blood boiled, he would give his life to protect the princesses, and this.... whatever it was, would not take another step toward them. When the creature just did that he released his spell, putting everything he had into it. It hit the creature with a loud boom and stirred up a lot of smoke. Shining smiled, Looks like- All of the ponies in the garden gasped, as the smoke cleared to reveal the creature looking like nothing had happened.

Suddenly it was right in front of him, all 7 feet of him, not looking very happy. getting lifted up by the scruff on the neck with only one of its claws so their faces almost touched, Shining received a good look at its glowing blue eyes. It growled and did something to Shining that had never happened to him, he got bitch slapped across the face. The creature kept slapping him on both cheeks.

“Are.you.out.of.your.god.damn.mind?" The creature said the words between each slap. Shining tried to defend himself but it was like his hooves were glued to his sides...

Twilight watched in horror as the giant human shrugged off her brother’s attack and proceeded to slap him around. The other guards stared in fear, none of them moving to help their captain. Their captain, one of the most powerful unicorns in Equestria, was being slapped around by this creature. Twilight looked at the princesses and saw fear on ones face and confusion on the other.

“Girls" Twilight said to her 5 friends. “We need to get the elements of harmony." They looked at each other and nodded, running into the castle.

Luna couldn't believe her eyes, one of her greatest friends, no, one of her family was slapping Shining Armor across the face again and again. Forge used to do that to soldiers during the war before she had lost him and the others, or so she thought. In fact, if she wasn't so shocked she would have laughed at the craziness of it all. She looked at her sister, fear written all over her face. She said they died during the battle in the gardens. Why did she lie and why where they turned to statues? She thought as took a nervous step forward." Forge?" She asked nervously...

Forge looked up from the pony he was slapping the shit out of and looked at Luna, his anger giving way to a smile. Dropping the pony on the ground he turned toward his favorite princess. “Little one?" He asked her, she wasn't so little anymore, she was a good foot taller than him now. She had tears in her eyes and took another step forward, a smile on her face. He took another step forward, intending to wrap her in a hug but someone's shouting stopped him.

“STOP THERE CREATURE!"

Forge looked to the shouting, seeing six mares with necklaces on and the purple one had a crown in its head. That orange one has a neat hat on He thought as he looked them over. Then it hit him when he looked over the necklaces and crown over. “So the elements have new holders, interesting." He muttered as the six girls were lifted into the air, all of them glowing. Soon they were covered in a blinding light, their weapon of mass friendship ready to fire.

The ponies looked at the scary creature in horror then relief when the elements of harmony came back with the elements on them. They had defeated Discord, surely that could beat this creature. When the rainbow beam hit the creature in the chest they were all sure that it was statue time for it.

They were wrong....

All of the ponies gasped as the creature took the beam in the chest like it was nothing. It crossed its arms and waited for the beam to subside. The 6 girls looked in horror. The elements of harmony, the most powerful magic anypony knew, did nothing? “W-what?" Twilight said as the human looked them over, an amused look on his face. The girls looked at each other, not knowing what to do when a magic aura grabbed each of them and brought before the human. Twilight’s usually brilliant mind was having trouble piecing together what was happening.

This creature, this human, was somehow using magic when magic apparently didn't work in it. Twilight looked at the blue aura surrounding her and tried to free herself with magic but it was no use, the humans magic was unlike anything she had ever seen. She remembered that the human’s name was Forge I thought he was a good guy she thought as he made the girls form a semi-circle around him.

“You’ll never get away with this monster!" Rainbow said, trying to get out of her magical holding and failing. Forge raised an eyebrow.

“What am I getting away with?" He asked stumping all of the girls.

“Whatever yer going ta do!" Applejack shouted.

“What am I going to do? I got out of my prison and got attacked, more than once I might add."

The girls looked at each other, confused.“B-but y-you said y-you said that you were going to turn the princess into glue." Fluttershy said barely above a whisper.

Forge was about to answer her when he heard, “P-please d-don't hurt mah sister Mr. Forge." Forge turned around and saw 3 fillies cowering a few feet from him. All of his anger melted and he squatted down to the filly’s eye level and motioned for them to come closer. Applejack tried to yell but nothing came out of her mouth as she watched as her sister and her friends approached Forge.

The poor things are shaking Forge thought as the fillies came closer. He looked at the earth pony with the red bow in her mane, the one that told him not to hurt her sister. “What’s your name little ones?" He asked her.

“I-I'm Applebloom, this is Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle." She said, making Forge smile.

“I’m not going to hurt anypony Applebloom; I'm just making sure I'm not going to get attacked again." She looked up at him.

“Promise?" Forge looked at her seriously.

“I swear in my life that no harm will come to these girls."

The 3 fillies looked a lot less scared and they looked to the other 2 human statues. “Mr. Forge" Sweetie said. "If you were a statue do those other 2 statues have your friends in them?" Forge nodded and looked up, princess Luna was walking toward him. Forge smiled and got up.

"Excuse me girls, I need to say hello to my little sister." He told the fillies as he walked to Luna, wrapping the crying monarch into a tight embrace.

“w-eee m-missed you s-so much!" The princess said between sobs.

“I’ve missed you too little one" Forge said, tears in his eyes " Or is it big one now? Christ, you girls got big." forge looked at Celestia and frowned. “You young lady" he said to her “are in trouble when I wake the others up." He picked the still shocked princess up with his magic and floated her over. He then walked over to the other human statues, knocking on the bases. “Hey guys" He said to the statues “I’m getting you out but you're not killing anything, we're going to the war room to have a chat with Tia, Luna, and these new element holders. That’s an order."

Luna watched as Forge put magic through his hands and touched the statues. They cracked and two other humans hit the ground. They stood up and Luna once again saw how much bigger Forge was, height-wise. She first looked at Longstrider, his thin frame and his crazy colored jerkin and leggings with his stupid pointed shoes with his glowing green eyes. Then she looked at Reaper in his blue and grey robes with his metal vambraces and his dark skin and golden glowing eyes, which were covered by his hood.

They both looked happy to be out, Longstrider laughed, popping his bones. “Finally" he said in the cheerful voice that Luna remembered so well

“We’re free, so we're going to have a talk with Tia eh?" Reaper looked at Forge and Longstrider and the hugged each each of them. “Thank you Forge" Reaper said, his voice sounding like rocks grinding together " I had this itch on my back that I've been meaning to scratch for the last 200 years." They all laughed and the two looked at Luna, both of them smiling. She rushed them and wrapped them in hugs, crying.

Forge clapped his hands together. “Alright, let’s get to the war room." He looked at the crusaders “Do you girls want to come?" They smiled and nodded as Forge floated the 6 girls and the princess toward him and they all walked into the castle, leaving some very confused ponies outside in the garden....

The 6 girls were very confused. These humans weren't going to hurt them; Luna was even hugging them and crying on their shoulders. They wanted answers and the Forge had promised them. Goodness knows that we deserve them Twilight thought as they were floated down another hall through the castle.

Forge was happy; he and his brothers were free. Longstrider looked at him, grinning. “I can't wait to spread the old wings Forgey." Forge rolled his eyes and gave him the finger as Dash looked at his back, wondering at his lack of wings.

“How in the hay can you fly, you don't have wings.” She said to him.

Forge snorted. “O he has wings; you're looking at the fastest thing in Equestria, probably in the whole world."

Dash's eyes filled with determination and pride. “I’m the fastest flyer in Equestria!" she said,

Longstrider looking back at her, grinning. “Really? Then we should have a little race then; earn my title back."

As he and Dash bickered, Forge looked at the pony with the hat. He floated her in front of him and looked her up and down. “You’re an Apple eh?" He asked her.

“How did ya know?” Aj asked, confused.

Forge grinned. “You have the look of 'em. There were a lot of Apples in the army back in my day, they had their whole battalion. Are there still like a million of you and do you still have a crazy obsession with apples?"

Applejack huffed. "We're not obsessed with our apples!"

Forge looked at her and grinned and looked at Applebloom. " Hey Applebloom" He said to her " What’s your favorite kind of apple? Mines gala, but I'll also eat granny smith. Hey, if you had to pick which one would you pick farmer?"

Applejack looked thoughtful. " I'ah don't rightly know. Gala apples are so sweet and have such a nice crunch but granny smith-" She looked at his amused face as she rambled on about apples for 10 minutes and stopped, red faced, realizing that she proved his point. He and Applebloom chuckled at her.

Twilight cleared her throat. Forge raised an eyebrow and switched Aj’s place with hers. "Hello ,Mr. Forge"

"Just Forge ma'am"

"Okay Forge, my names ,Twilight Sparkle-."

Longstrider and Reaper groaned. "Why, even after 2000 years do you ponies have such silly names?" Reaper asked. Forge scowled at them and motioned for Twilight to continue.

"Anyway I have so many questions for-" Forge raised a hand, cutting her off.

"Ms. Sparkle all will be revealed when we get to the war room." He said. Twilight huffed as he put her back with the other girls. Where and the hay is the war room even at? She thought grumpily as the humans led them through the maze of halls to a room that hadn't been used in a 1000 years.......

Ch.3 Retribution

As the humans led the ponies through the castle Longstrider noticed that they were all cut up and bleeding, especially Forge, who was leaving a trail of blood behind him. " Um Forgey?" He said, making Forge turn around, an eyebrow raised.

" Ya?" Longstrider pointed the trail of blood out to him. Forge looked himself and his brothers over and chuckled, they were a mess. " Looks like I got the worst of the battle, you pussy’s weren't in the thick of it like I was. Shit, we even got blood on Luna's coat and goddamnit my mails wrecked."

The girls looked over the humans and gasped at how badly hurt they were, Fluttershy strained against the magic that was holding her. " You poor dears, let me help you......I'm sorry for yelling..." The humans waved her off and Forge let the girls go, except Celestia, all them of them falling roughly to the floor.

" We'll fix ourselves when we get- O here we are!" Reaper said as they approached a massive door.

It took 2 of the humans to move the doors, the hinges creaking, showing that these doors hadn't been used in a long time. The ponies looked at each other and followed Luna into the darkness of the room. " Um" Dash began " is somepony going-" Forge sucked in his breath and looked at one of the torches in the walls. The girls watched as he exhaled, shooting a stream of blue flame, lighting the torch which set off a row of torches around the room.

The girls looked around, the room was massive. In the center was a table in the shape of Equestria and the countries that surrounded it. The humans walked over to 3 big metal containers and put their hands on them. Together they said, “We are Thanes, open the fuck up." Luna chuckled at the old joke as the doors opened, revealing in the containers everything that the humans needed, from spare weapons to what they were looking for, their medical kits and some spare cloths.

The humans and mares sat down at the table while the fillies ran around the room to explore. Reaper and Longstrider helped Forge take his chain mail off to reveal cuts all over his body, most of them bleeding heavily. They sat their friend down and got out some needle and thread as Fluttershy flew over to him. " No that medicine is far too old, It'll get him sick.... I'm sorry for yelling again." She said as Forge chuckled.

" Ma'am, those containers are magically altered, everything as fresh as the day we put them in it. Get on with it boys, before I bleed to fucking death." The girls watched as they started to sew his wounds close and put some kind of salve on them, Forge not even flinching. Rainbow walked over to him and looked him over.

" Doesn't that hurt?" She asked, slightly sick seeing all of the blood. Forge looked at her and shrugged, earning him a smack from Reaper for moving.

" Fuck you Reaper, I'll kick your black ass..... I've had a lot worse, you should of seen me when I had to do this in the trenches, I had to use a splinter, THAT hurt.... Alright, that’s enough stitching; we can finish up in a minute. " Forger said, getting up and walking over to Celestia, who looked sad and scared. The other humans surrounded her and looked her down. Even thought Celestia was over 3 feet taller than them, it seemed like they towered over her to her.

" Now Tia, when you stoned us it took about 200 years for us to get a magical connection to talk to each other and boy were we pissed. " Forge said. Tia tried to say something but his magic made her jaw snap up so she couldn't talk. " For a 1000 years we were very angry, all that we had done for you and your da, after Empress and Warlock died for YOU, we get stoned like criminals. Then we discussed why you did it." He said, walking around her.

Then Forge did something that no pony, especially Celestia, thought he would do, he wrapped a shocked Tia into a hug. " Then we figured who gives a shit, Tia's our sister, you can't stay mad at your family, no matter how badly they fuck up." The other humans looked up at her and nodded, smiling.

" Y-your not mad at me?" Tia asked, tears in her eyes. The humans laughed.

" It's hard to stay mad at someone for 2000 years Tia. Anyway, we're pretty sure it was an accident." Longstrider said as Tia broke down, wailing and telling them over and over again who sorry she was.

The other ponies looked on with tears in their eyes as the humans hugged and calmed a crying Celestia for about ten minutes. Afterward She had a small, releaved smile on her face, looking like a heavy weight had been lifted off her shoulders. " But that doesn't mean your not getting a punishment." Reaper said, grinning with the other humans. Tia actually started to sweat, she knew what was coming.

" You know what the thanes do to punish women, assume the position Tia."

Twilight watched as her teacher sighed and got up from her chair. Luna was chuckling when Tia showed her flank to the grinning humans. They started to shake out their wrist and wiggle their fingers. What are they goin- Twilight thought as Forge brought his hand back.

SMACK

Celestia yelped as Forge left a hand print on her flank, quickly followed by the other 2 humans, leaving 3 red hand prints on Celestia's flank. " Now go make me a sandwich WOMAN!" The 3 humans said. Luna fell over laughing and the girls looked at the event with shock. Their princess, the pony responsible for raising the sun, got flanked slapped by 3 humans. Needless to say Twilight almost broke, her eye twitching and her mane becoming disheveled. The 3 humans fell over with Luna, laughing..

Forge got up and sat in his chair, wiping a tear from his face. " Christ, that's awesome every time we do it, I swear to god Tia if you sit down I'll give you a 100 bits." Celestia shook her head no and kept standing, getting more laughs from the humans and Luna. Forge looked at the 6 girls and frowned, getting up and walking over to them. " Tia" He said, looking at Celestia " Why are ponies so much bigger now? Why are you 10 fucking feet tall?"

Rarity huffed, " These humans are ruffians! with their language." she said, looking disapprovingly at Forge, who raised an eyebrow.

" I'm sorry ma'am, you get use to talking to soldiers for so long you forget proper manners, forgive us." he said and then he facepalmed. " I guess we should introduce ourselves eh?" after introductions Forge's stomach growled loudly, making all of the ponies giggle. " Christ I'm hungry" Forge lamented, looking at Celestia. " Tia, ya got any steaks here? I could eat a hydra." The others humans nodded and the six girls backed away.

" You eat meat?" Rainbow said, getting confused looks from the humans.

" Yep, we'll eat hydra, Manticore, stuff like that. Tia wouldn't us eat cows or deer. We'll also eat plants, we're omnivores." Longstrider said, showing them his canines.

Reaper looked at the ponies. " They're scared of us eating meat."

Forge snorted. " No there not, the ponies we knew were fine- shi-fuc- darn they are." forge looked at Celestia. " Tia, why are these ponies acting like they've never seen anything eating meat?"

" Because almost everything except griffons are plant eaters."

" Your shi- pulling my leg. Don't dragons eat meat?"

" Dragons keep to themselves nowadays, but they usually eat gems over meat."

" Fa-shi-da-........."

Forge sighed at not being able to swear and Rarity was touched that he was trying so hard not to swear in front of her.

The humans groaned. " I'm not just eating plants Tia." Longstrider said as Forge looked thoughtful.

"Tia, when was the last war?" Forge asked.

" A 1000 years ago." The 3 humans looked at her dumbfounded.

" Tia, let me see this years damage report." Forge said to Celestia, who sighed at the very old term for a city’s annual statistics report.

Celestia's horn glowed and a paper flashed in front of Forge, who snatched it out of the air and started reading. It was this year’s damage report for the city of Canterlot; it had everything from deaths to the crime rate to damage reports. As he looked over the scroll Forge didn't know wither to be happy or sad. The whole world seemed to of calmed down since they were frozen, he had never seen a crime rate so low, ever, the murder rate either. Knowing that the other 2 really wouldn't want to read the scroll, Forge rolled it open and said, “So you’re saying that ponies now are bigger and less violent?"

“I suppose so." The humans humped and Forge looked a little angry.

“You know, there were about 50 guards outside when I was freed and only one attacked me.” Forge growled." Tia, the ponies now are bigger but they're a hell of a lot softer. Back in our day those 50 guards would have attacked me on sight. I think I need to have a little talk with them." He pulled a chair in front of the girls as the fillies came back from playing. “First its story time girls. Gather around and let me spin you a yarn.... Wait a couple of minutes though; if I don't get the rest of these cuts stitched I'm definitely going to bleed out. Hey Tia, you'd better tell all of the ponies that we aren't going to hurt anypony......"
.

Ch.4 Q and A time..... Sorta

After Celestia called off code there's-dangerous-aliens-and-they're-going-to-kill-everypony-panic-PANIC! and the humans looked after their wounds and got on a new set of cloths, Forge sat down and beckoned the 3 fillies over to him. “Girls you want to see something neat?" He asked, looking at the fillies. They nodded their heads, excited. Forge smiled and reached behind Scootaloo’s ear and brought his hand in front of their faces, revealing something that the girls had never seen.

"What's that Mr. Forge?" Sweete asked.

“This girls, is a slinky. We had them where I came from, they're toys and it took me a few tries but I recreated them. “The girls looked at the slinky with interest. Forge played with it in his hands, making it wider and slinking it back and forth, making the fillies laugh. “Here girls I have on for each of you" He said, giving each of them one. “Now you know the best thing about a slinky is? If you do it right you can make them go down a bunch of stairs. Why don't you try it out?"

Grinning, the Crusaders ran out of the war room with their Slinkys in their mouths, looking for a long flight of stairs. Forge looked at the six girls. “You if any of you girls are squeamish I’d suggest you go with the little ones." Fluttershy got up and trotted out of the room, almost running. The other 5 girls smiled at their friend and looked at Forge, who had somehow gotten a pipe and was putting tobacco in it. “You ladies mind? Nasty habit I know, but being able to breathe fire I probably wouldn't get lung cancer." He said chuckling.

Releasing a small jet of flame he lit the pipe until it was smoking merrily. Taking a long drag and blowing out a smoke ring he looked at the mares. “We can't explain everything to you girls, oaths of silence, you know how they are, but how about you start with the easy questions and we can go from there." Twilight was practically jumping up and down from excitement. Getting out a quill and paper from seemingly out of nowhere, she cleared her throat and thought of the perfect first question, something that wasn’t too personal and it would get the ball rolling.

"So what are-" Pinkie thought, ruined it with her barrage of questions.

Jumping up and down all around the humans she said a mile-a-minute. “Doyoulikepartiewhatwasitliketobe-" Forge snapped his fingers above her head and tapped her on the head.

“Sit" He commanded. The girls watched dumbfounded as a confused Pinkie sat on her hunches right next to Forge. Forge began petting her like a dog as he turned back toward Twilight. “Good girl. Go ahead Mrs. Sparkle." Twilight shook her head and cleared her throat.

“Um okay, what are your full names?"

“Are real names are our own, only the old king and my brothers and sisters know our real names." Forge told a confused Twilight.

“Why?"

“Names hold power, so we made up new ones when we came to your world. But my full title is Captain Forge Metalworker."

“I’m Lieutenant Longstrider Highflyer." Longstrider.

“And I'm Sergeant Reaper Deathdealer." They all struck their chest with closed fist.

“We are the Thanes, the special forces and the shock troops of the old Equestrian army." The girls looked at each other as Twilight frantically wrote what they were saying down.

“So where are you from?"

“Terra" Forge said simply. Twilight looked up from her notes and waited for further explanation and getting none, just a blank stare from Forge and the others.

"Can't you go into more detail?" She asked, getting a sinking feeling that this question and answer session was going to give her far more questions than answers.

"Nope" Twilight sighed in frustration.

"Okay, how did you get to this world?"

"Tia and Luna’s dad got us."

"Why?" Forge took another drag of his pipe and looked thoughtful.

"Why as in why he picked us or why he needed humans? I can answer both."

"Please do." Twilight said, smiling.

"The first why I really have no idea; one day we were just sitting in our room talking when a big alicorn appears in our room" Forge chuckled" Scared the shit out of us. I can't tell you what he said or did to convince us to help him but he did. First though, he wanted us to be prepared with what he needed." All of the humans grinned. "He pulled out a load of money, changed into a human, and we went shopping, almost drove the old horse nuts." Celestia and Luna chuckled, remembering when their father had told that tale. "But where was I? They needed us because of the war against Discord."

"Why did they need you?"

"Because he was outmatched, Discord and his allies were breed for war compared to his forces. Discord had the diamond dogs, the diamond ponies, some pony allies, the griffins, and the worst, the goblins."

"What are goblins?" Rainbow asked.

"Imagine us but midnight black, totally evil and an unrelenting need to destroy everything in the most horrible way possible." The girls shuddered.

"Don't worry girls" Celestia said, trying to calm them "goblins died out a 1000 years ago."

“Anyway" Forge said “All that Tia's dad had were the ponies, the Fergius, and some dragons of questionable loyalty."

"What’s a Fergius?" Twilight asked.

"Can't tell you, they're very particular about who knows of their existence."

"But you told us their names!" Forge snorted.

"Just because you know something's name doesn't mean you know anything about them." Twilight almost groaned, Forge knew of all these creatures that she had NEVER heard about and he couldn't tell her about them.

"Now why he picked humans? A couple of reasons; You ponies aren't really made for war like griffins or diamond dogs. You have to hold your weapons in your mouth, you were a lot smaller, and things like killing don't come easy to you. Humans thought are built more like diamond dogs and violence comes almost naturally to us. Sure, you’re a pretty sturdy fork, a shit load stronger than us and you can use magic. But the old king did stuff to us to make us basically living war machines. It’s the reason that we're as strong and as fast as we are, and it's also why I breath fire and Longstrider has his wings."

“I still don't see any wings...." Dash grumbled at the back of the group.

“What about Reaper?" Twilight asked. Reaper grinned and Forge said, “Have you girls heard Reaper at all, you hear his footsteps or heard him breathing?" The girls shook their heads no. “Exactly, he doesn't make any noise, perfect for an assassin."

The girls looked at the humans, slightly horrified. In a place that had almost forgotten about war, 3 beings that thrived in it were now loose. They seem so nice though Twilight thought .....Well other than Forge attacking my brother and slapping Celestia in the ...actually, now that I think about it, Forge really isn't that nice.... but the others seem to be and Forge said they did it for Equestria, and it was a different time. She then looked up from her notes almost shyly. Now was the question of the century for her.

"Why didn't our magic work on you and why can you use magic? Why didn't the elements work on you?" All of the other girls leaned in closer, except Pinkie, who had fallen asleep with Forges petting, they wanted to know too. I bucking swear if he says-

"I can't tell you...." This time Twilight couldn't hold in her groan this time, slamming her head against the table. Everyone in the room chuckled. "....But I CAN tell you some things about our magic."

"BUCK YES PLEASE!!!!" Twilight cheered and immediately blushed at her foul language, making everyone in the room laugh.

"The magic that we can do is limited and it needs, in my case, special settings to work. For example, all I can do well is levitate things and grab things out of the air and stuff like that, and you know that I breathe fire. The problem is that I need some contact with the ground to work, your magic might not work on us but it will work on most of our cloths, you get me up in the air and I'm magicless. I can do some little spells after that but that’s it.

Longstrider over there can increase and slow down the speed of things and Reaper can affect shadows, it’s scary as hell, you got to get him to show you some time. O and for some reason lead messes with our magic, if you put it on us then we're a lot weaker. Or if you have any lead on your person our magic can't touch you."

Twilight was having the academic time of her life. She was learning a whole kind of magic from things that were supposed to be legends! but something was bothering her though. "Ummmm if you don't mind me asking, why are you telling us your weakness; should they be with the things you can’t talk about?"

"Ya!" Rainbow said, flying eye level to an amused Forge. "It seems like we could beat the tar outta you guys if we put lead on ya." The humans chuckled.

"Trust us" Longstrider said "Lead just makes us weaker and slower. We've been trained for years not being as strong or as fast as we are now, and even then we could take you ponies out pretty easy." The girls nodded slowly, giving the humans the benefit of the doubt, well except Dash who thought she could put any of the humans in the hospital in 10 seconds flat.

"Now can you fill us in on everything that’s happened in Equestria? Do they have plumbing yet?" Longstrider whined, turning toward Celestia and getting a smack from Forge. Twilight thought it was odd that they knew about plumbing but remembered that they weren't going to tell her anything about their world so she mentally shrugged (more like mentally slammed her head against the table but hey…) and did what she was best at, lectured. It took about thirty minutes and she saw Forge get noticeably angrier as the lecture went on, but then he looked confused toward the end of it.

Walking to a map and putting it on the table Forge said, pointing at ponyville. " So let me get this straight, you ponies are allies of griffins, you basically NEED hugs to survive, you ponies think that Tia and Luna are gods, and Tia you gave all of my land to a bunch of Apples and said land is now called Ponyville? O and your guards are a bunch of little girls and an invasion by these changelings was stopped by the power of love? O and Discord came back for some goddamn reason?"

Celestia cleared her throat. "Yes" Forge sat down, a confused look on his face. Reaper and Longstrider whistled.

"Wow, I've only ever seen Forge so angry that he gets confused once, good job Tia." Applejack was still confused about how Forge said ponyville was his land.

"What do ya mean ya own ponyville?" She asked Forge who walked over to his metal container and took out a document and put it on the table. It showed that in face he DID own all of ponyville. He had a land permit with Celestia's seal on it.

Land permit,

The land between Canterlot and Manehatten in a 10 mile radius near the Everfree forest is now owned by a Forge Metalworker to do as he will until the property is sold, given away, or any other complication.

Celestia,

Regent of the sun and princess of Equestria

“Those directions seem like they're right smack dab in the center of your ponyville to me. Tia let me have the land when I wouldn't stop harassing her about it .I wanted a place close enough to Canterlot to visit but far enough to work in my forge in peace. You know Tia I could sue you, and it’s not going to be called ponyville anymore."

Celestia rolled her eyes, “Why not?!"

“Because a moron could of made up a better name." Applejack huffed; her family had named ponyville after all.

“From now on it’s going to be called Forge's Town."

“That’s a stupid name."

“You’re a stupid name!"

“That doesn't make sense; I'm not a foal Forge so I'm not going to play this game with you!"

“Dummy says what?" Forge muttered.

“What?"

Luna giggled as Celestia and Forge argued like the siblings they were. The arguing ceased as Forge’s stomach growled angrily at him, telling him that he needed something to eat. Getting up from his chair and sighing, he said, “I’m looking to see if there's anything good in the kitchen, you guys want to come?" Forge asked Reaper and Longstrider, who nodded and got up with him and left the room, leaving the 5 girls and the princesses.

Twilight slumped in her chair. “Princess" she said toward her teacher “can you tell me more about them?" Celestia smiled at her students NEED for the knowledge.

“I’m sorry Twilight" She said, putting a hoof on her students shoulder." But I can't either, humans aren’t supposed to be in this world and the more we know about them the more balance of things gets..... unstable." Twilight slumped "But I can tell you about them on a personal level and I will tell you about them as a species and as people." Twilight perked up.

" First off, lets start off with Forge." Celestia said "You've already seen that he has a… bit of a temper. He is also the mad scientists of metalworking, so if you see a crazed look in his eyes DO NOT encourage him."

Luna grinned evilly. You know sister" Luna said " Forge forgot to tell the girls about his other power." The girls looked at her quizenly.

"What power?" Twilight asked. Luna’s smile got bigger and eviler.

“Did you girls feel calm around him? Not really threatened by him at all?"

“Why yes" Rarity said” He seems...... rough around the edges though. Why princess?"

“Because Rarity" Luna said, her smile gaining Pinkie Pie proportions. “For some reason Forge releases pheromones naturally from his sweat, mares can't keep their hooves off him. You all might feel it right now, an uncontrollable attraction to him."

The girls looked at her confused. “No, not really, what about you girls?" Twilight said the others girl’s shaking their heads no as Luna’s smile grew so wide it was threatening to lift off her face.

“You will soon girls."

“He must of been a lady’s man then." Applejack remarked. Both of the princesses chuckled.

“You’d think so” Celestia said,” and many mares tried but there's a problem, Forge is terrified of mares in a romantic sense." The girls looked at each other.

“Why?" Dash asked “Is he a colt cuddlier?" Now the princesses were laughing openly.

“No" Luna said,” In the words of our brother ' mares are dangerous animals' you'll see, just try to come on to him at all." Twilight looked at Luna.

“Princess" She said "Did you say that Forge is your brother?" Luna nodded her head.

"Yes Twilight Sparkle, so are Reaper and Longstrider, our father adopted them after they spent a few years with us."

"So they're princes?" Rarity asked, her eyes sparkling.

Celestia chuckled, " Yes, but don't remind them, they don't like being reminded their royalty."

"Princess, what happened to the other 2 humans, you did say there were 5 right?" Dash asked. Both of the princesses looked sad.

" It’s not our place to tell, Twilight, the humans might tell you but give them time, it'll be a very sore subject for them."

"Um princess?" Aj said " Now that they're free and what not, what’s going ta happen ta them?" Celestia smiled.

"Now that they're free they are going continue to do what they swore to me they would do, protect the elements. They're going to be living in ponyville to keep an eye on you girls." She walked toward the map that Forge had put on the table. "Forge's going to want to have a Forge set up so he can work." She tapped her hoof to her chin thoughtfully. "I'll put him out near you Applejack, it’s outside of ponyville enough for him not to keep the locals awake all night."

Celestia grinned at Luna and they both looked at the girls. "I guess we should tell you about the other two, now listen about Longstrider, it’s hilarious......"

Forge and his brothers had just raided the kitchens, scaring the shit out if the cook who happened to be a damn good throw with his knives. After some reassuring, threatening, and a knife wound, the cook was happy to cook something for them. The humans were happy to find the Equestrians had pizza now so they asked for about 10 pies. Forge was carrying one of those pies down to the dungeons. Ignoring or glaring at the guards and opening the door, Forge looked over the changeling queen that had tried to take over Canterlot, queen Chrysalis. She was chained to the wall with ring on her horn, something to stop her magic Forge guessed.

She was looking warily at him as he put the pizza down and walked over to her. She was in between the height of Tia and Luna with holes all over her black body. "What are you?" She asked, confused. After her capture by the ponies, her hoard had disowned her and left her for dead. No one had come to visit her since... well she couldn't remember when. Now this monkey thing with glowing eyes just came in with a pizza, looking her over.

Forge got closer to her, within touching distance. "What are you doin-" He grabbed the chains around her legs and ripped them off, and then he took the ring off her horn. Plopping down in front of the confused queen he grabbed the pie and held it out to her. “Want some?" He asked her, taking a piece and eating one himself.....

Author's Note

A New years present for you guys, happy new years!

Freeing the queen and paying respects

Freeing the queen and paying respects

“Want some?"

Chrysalis looked at the monkey thing, a shocked expression on her face. It had just freed her and let gave her access to her magic. This has to be some kind of trap. She thought as Forge took a bite out of his slice of pizza and held the rest of the pizza under her muzzle. “It’s just pizza, you must be sick of prison food." When the pizza smell hit her nose her stomach betrayed her, growling loudly.

Forge chuckled and she glared at him, taking a piece of pizza with her magic and hungrily eating it. Forge used his magic to keep the platter up in the air and sat down next to the door and pulled out a piece of paper and a pen and started writing down everything that he would need for a new smithy, if he was going to protect the elements he could at least continue his work.

Chrysalis had just finished the whole pie and she saw him pretty much ignoring her, writing something on a piece of paper. She frowned. So this thing is going to study me, well I'll give him the research of his life! She rose to her full height, wings at full extension. “Creature" she yelled in her most evil voice. “Prepare for th-"

Not looking up from his writing, Forge interrupted her. " You need to be more sadistic sounding for a good evil voice” he told her, “ now be quiet, I have to remember everything I need to ask Tia for my new smithy."

"W-What?" A confused Chrysalis asked. "Aren't you here to study me?" Forge snorted.

"Christ no, I just thought you would want some pizza and I wanted to see the pony bug thing-"

"Changeling"

"-changeling that almost brought Canterlot to its knees. You did have a good plan control a powerful unicorn and take Canterlot from the inside. What kills me is that my stupid ass nephew KNEW that an invasion was coming and you still almost got'em. I gotta say, that sucks." Chrysalis sighed, sitting next to him.

"I know; all of that planning and I end up left for dead..... Wait, who’s your nephew?"

"Since Tia has a cousin that married jackass Shining Armor and Tia's my sister I guess he's my nephew, one that really doesn't deserve his position as captain mind you."

Now Chrysalis was really confused. "Who’s Tia?"

"Celestia"

"Okay... How are you her brother?"

“I'm adopted."

"Ooooo. So what are you called?"

"You can call me Forger or Forge." Chrysalis gasped. Even in the badlands they had heard of the Thanes and what they did during the Chaos wars.

"B-But you all died."

"Nope, accidental stoning, I just got out a few hours ago in fact."

"Congratulations."

"Thanks"

"Now are you going to tell me why you are really here, you going to execute the evil queen?" Forge chuckled.

"No offence -"

"Chrysalis"

“Christ that’s a mouth full ... How about Chrissy?"

"That's fine."

"Anyway, no offence Chrissy, but I shit more evil things than you." Chrysalis looked at him quizingly and slightly offended.

"What do you mean?"

"Did anypony die when you invaded?"

"I don't think so; I wanted Canterlot, not corpses." She explained to him.

"Would you kill me to get out of this door?" She looked at him and then at the unlocked, slightly opened door and weighted her chances on getting out of the castle in one piece.

"No" Forge chuckled.

"So you don't want to hurt anypony?" Chrysalis shrugged.

"Not really." Forge spread his arms and grinned at her.

"See? Not an evil bone in your body; come on" He said, getting up and opening the door. Chrysalis looked at him funny as he motioned her out the door.

"Where are we going?"

"Well, first I’m going to get you cleaned up; a bath would be good for you. Then we're going to tell Tia that you're staying with me in ponyville, or you can go back to your hive if you want."

“Why? Aren't I an enemy of the state for trying to take over Canterlot?" Forge chuckled again as she trotted out of her cell.

"What you call an invasion I call a training exercise, besides I want to see the look on Tia's face when I bring you out into the war room....."

“Where’s Forge?" Celestia asked as Reaper, Longstrider, Applebloom, and Sweete Belle, and Scootaloo (who they found on their way back to the war room) stuffed as much pizza as they could into their mouths. Reaper shrugged,

“He was with us when we got the pizzas, you want some Tia?" Celestia was busy rolling her eyes when she heard footsteps coming from outside of the war room with.... another pair of hoofsteps? Who is he bringing? Celestia thought as Forge walked through the room as calm as can be with the changeling queen Chrysalis. The other humans looked curious as all hell broke loose.

Celestia and Luna got up, horns charge with spells as the other girls got what weapons they could, Rarity and Twilight had their magic, Pinkie, now wake, had her party cannon that she had gotten out of nowhere, Applejack grabbed a chair and was about to throw it at the changeling, Rainbow flew up into the air and was about to smash into her, and Fluttershy was hiding under the table. Chrysalis charged her horn, ready to defend herself.

With an eye roll, Forge brought his fingers to his lips and whistled. Everyone in the room had their respective appendices covering their ears as Forge whistled long and hard. After he was done he glared at them all. "Everyone calm the fuck down, now. Christ, all she did was try to take over Equestria." He chuckled at all of the confused faces as Celestia was trying to form words.

"Forge" She said, trying to calm herself. "Why is an enemy of the state out of her cell?"

"That’s easy" Forge stated, patting a still weary Chrysalis on the shoulder "When you build the base she's going to be my roomie."

"WHAT!" All of the ponies yelled as the human’s sported faked hurt looks.

"Aw Forgey" Longstrider said "You don't want us to live with you?" Forge snorted.

"Get your own houses, unless you want to help me in my blacksmithing?" He said, looking somewhat hopeful. Both of the humans shivered, shaking their heads no.

"I'd rather put my balls through the grinder." Reaper said.

"Blacksmithing is fun!" Forge said, offended.

"No its not you crazy bastard, it’s loud, hot, and exhausting! Not to mention you make it fucking dangerous!"

“That’s exactly what the black guy would say!” Forge all but spat.

“What does that mean you son of….”

As the humans argued Celestia was sporting a pretty impressive frown. “Girls" She said to the mares and the fillies as calmly as she could “Could you please leave for a few minutes, I need to have a little talk with Forge." Nodding, the girls left, moving around Chrysalis as far as they could. Using her magic to grab the human’s cloths, Celestia made them crash into each other with 3 OOOOFFFf's.

“What the fuck Tia?" Forge said as he rubbed his now bruised head.

“Forge" She said, rubbing her temples with her hoof "You’re free after 2000 years of accidental imprisonment and you already let an enemy of the state out of her prison, can you please tell me why?" Forge smiled, walking over to Celestia patted her on her head, messing up her mane. He answered as Celestia thought how Forge could mess up her mane when it was pure magic and therefore not touchable.

"Sure Tia, first, changeling magic is different from pony magic so I wanted to experiment on what her magic would do to metal. Second, really, what did she do? Took over Canterlot for 5 minutes. Anypony you should blame that on is that dumbass captain of yours. He knew an attack was coming and it still caught everypony off guard. Third, have you had a normal conversation with her? She's actually pretty nice."

"She feeds on love." Celestia deadpanned

"We all have our problems Tia." Forge quipped "Don't you still have that problem with cake?"

Despite everything Celestia blushed, "I-I don't have a problem with cake!"

"Really?" Forge teased "if I brought a big ass cake out here it wouldn't be eaten in 5 minutes by somepony?"

“S-Shut up!"

As Forge and Celestia argued, Luna and the other humans walked over to Chrysalis, who was trying very hard not to laugh. "Hello Chrysalis" Luna said, extending a hoof in greeting which Chrysalis shook. "I didn't see you when you tried to take over Canterlot." Chrysalis looked at Luna confused.

"Why aren't you mad at me like your sister?" Luna shrugged.

"Forge IS right, and you changelings needed love to survive and nopony really got hurt so no harm no foul."
The humans also introduced themselves and the 4 of them had a nice conversation as Forge and Tia argued; both of them so close their foreheads touching, Tia with a scowl and a look at could kill and Forge looking like he was trying hard not to laugh. The argument shifted to dangerous territory, Tia's physical condition

“I AM NOT OUT OF SHAPE!”

“Are you sure Tia? You look like you gained a few pounds."

“BUCK YOU!"

“Come on Tia, no need to be short, it’s probably not even your fault that you look like you're pregnant, you’re probably too busy ruling for proper exercise." Celestia took a threatening posture, her wings ourstreched.

“You say one more thing I'm beating your flank into the ground."

"AWWW is wittle Tia mad?"

Celestia had had enough, she charged a laughing Forge, intending to buck him into next week. Both of them kept running around the table, Tia chasing him. Soon though, the chaser was becoming the chasee as Forge was behind her, mischief in his eyes. Tia knew what he was going to do and increased her speed, trying to get away from him. The chase lasted a good 10 minutes before Tia slowed down, unused to the physical strain. It was all Forge needed.

Tackling the princess to the ground, Forge gave her a raspberry right on her belly. "Forger!" She yelled, trying to get out of his grasp as he kept doing it on the most ticklish part of her belly. "Stop *giggle* at once * giggle* I'm a princess for bucks sake!"

Luna coughed, making the two look up at her, Celestia kicking Forge across the room, Forge landed on his ass with a yelp. "Damnit Tia!" She stuck her tongue out at him and looked at her sister. “Yes Luna?" Luna had a small smile on her face, she missed these family squabbles, it really was good that they were back. “Well Tia” She said” I think we should we should let Chrysalis stay with Forge, she really does seem nice."

Celestia put a hoof to her chin, deep in thought. “Hummmmm...... Chrysalis do you promise not to hurt any of my subjects?"

“Sure" Chrysalis said

“.....Okay, why not?”

“Wait a fucking second!" Forge yelled " You flip the fuck out on me and when Luna says it’s okay then your all for it?! Fuck you Tia!"

“I love you too Forge."

“I’m going to shove that horn of yours up your ass."

“Yes I missed you to and yes, the weather really has been lovely."

The siblings looked at each other, both of them trying not to laugh. They were able to keep straight faces for a good 2 minutes but then it broke when Celestia snorted. Forge snorted back and they both broke out into laughter, Celestia trotting over to forge and wrapping him into a hug. “I really missed this." She said as Forge hugged her back.

“Me too Tia"

“You know I am sorry, we tried for years to free you 3."

“I know, we could see you." Celestia gasped.

“You could see while you were frozen?" She said, almost to tears. Forge chuckled.

“It really wasn't that bad, it was nice to just stand around and do nothing, peaceful really. While I stood there I got some ideas for new metal combinations. Which reminds me” Forge pulled out a piece of paper and handing it to her. Celestia chuckled and raised an eyebrow as she read all that he wanted for a workplace.

"Why do you need all of this Forge? Is the 300 pound anvil and all of these chemicals necessary?..... And what do you need a smelter for?" Forge chuckled, rubbing the back of his head.

"Classified" He said.

She burst out laughing. "You know Forge, we found some new metals; do you want me to send them with you?" Forge got a crazed, mad scientist look in his eyes.

"New metals" He muttered to himself “Think of all of the tests I can do with them, think of all of the possibilities!" Celestia chuckled as Forge rambled on to himself, getting more and more excited. Using her magic to open the doors, Celestia saw to her amusement that the 6 girls fall over, each of them having a glass in their hooves, it was easy to see they were trying to listen to the conversation.

"I'm guessing that you girls heard most of that?" The girls sheepishly nodded, most of them not looking at Chrysalis with anger anymore. "Good, now that’s all settled...." She winked at Rainbow Dash, who grinned, that was the sign she was waiting for. Walking seductively over to Forge, how looked at her with unease in his eyes. All of the girls, even the fillies, really didn't really think that Forge was as scared of mares as Celestia said, he was a bad motherbucker after all.

" So Forge" Rainbow said, her eyes half lidded as she got closer, swaying her hips back and forth seductively, Forge backing away, fear growing more and more prevalent in his face. " you look like such a big stron-"

Pinkie suddenly appeared right in front of him, standing on her back hooves and she arms wide, towering (in his mind at least) over him she said," Get off those cloths silly!"

Now none of the girls really thought themselves as terror inspiring in any way, shape, of form, but the look on his face was one of pure, unfiltered terror on his now pale face. He turned toward the window and made a beeline toward it, moving at ridiculous speed for how big he was.

“That boy got slave feet." Reaper remarked as Forge neared the window, probably intending to jump out of it, not being able to fly be damned. Longstrider looked at him, a small frown on his face.

“You’re a racist bastard." Reaper looked down at him from his nose.

“Shut up and make me a sandwich honkey."

Celestia put her magic through the window so when Forge tried to jump through it to moved like rubber, flinging him right back with a loud crash. Undeterred, he kept trying, terror still on his face. Forge wasn't a person that would let things like magic windows stop him from getting away from a dreaded *shudder* mare. “He really is scared of mares!" Dash said, on the ground laughing.

SMASH!

“Princess" Twilight said.

SMASH!

“How long-

SMASH!

“Is he going to do-

SMASH!

“This?"

Celestia laughed. “Forge-

SMASH!

“You know-

SMASH!

"That Twilight-

SMASH!

"Has a baby-

SMASH!

"Dragon that lives with her."

Forger was suddenly in front of her, a crazed look on his face. “You have a dragon?!" He said, almost squeeing.

“Yes Spi-" Forge lifted her in the air and started to swinging her around.

“This is great; I have access to dragon fire!" He happily said, " Warloc-" He stopped, a sad look on his face as he put a slightly sick Twilight down. “Tia" He said, his voice filled with sadness. “Where did you put the memorials?" The mares watched as the humans and the alicorns grew somber. Not saying anything, Celestia turned to the door, the humans and Luna following her.

The 6 girls and the 3 fillies looked at each other, they didn't know if they should go with them or not. After a quick deliberation, the girls let Pinkie and Fluttershy stay with the fillies as they followed them, Chrysalis not far behind. They found them in Celestia's private gardens, Celestia, Luna, Reaper, and Longstrider about 50 feet away from Forger, who was by 2 statues, one of a tall cloaked figure with a staff in its hands, the other looked like a human but it was one its knees, it looked female and it had wings that fell to its sides, its arms cupped in what looked like a silent prayer.

The girls walked over to the sad group, each of them silent. Luna gave them a small smile and she looked back at Forge, who somehow looked smaller, his hands on each of the statues. He looked like he was talking to them. “Forge always mourns alone, he doesn't want to see anyone to see him cry." Longstrider, who was now somber looking, said. "Those two are Empress and Warlock girls, our brother and sister. You might know Warlock by a different name though, StarSwirl the Bearded."

Twilight looked at him in shocked, "StarSwirl the bearded was a human?!" She asked the princess, who simply nodded, looking sad. "We thought it would be easier if ponies thought that StarSwirl was a pony." Celestia said. Both of the humans nodded and looked back at Forge.

" You know Tia, it probably was for the best that you froze us. When Empress died Forge almost broke, but when Warlock died he did break. It took us years to get him out of his madness." The princesses nodded, both looking equally sad.

"Forge always took their deaths so hard, remember girls-" Celestia said to the girls, each of them about to cry "you need to make Forge forget, no not forget, but come to terms with everything."

The girls had tears in their eyes as they looked at Forge, Who was walking toward them, now looking like his usual self. He walked over to them and the other 2 humans went to pay their respects. Forge looked at the girls and the changeling queen, each of them almost to tears, with something in their eyes. Forge felt a little happier that he finally got to say goodbye to Warlock. The girls scooted closer to him. Forge cocked his head at them, confused What are the-
He began to think as all 5 girls slammed into him, each of them trying to hug him, each of them crying.
He looked pleadingly at Celestia, how merely chuckled at his discomfort. “Girls-" He said. They ignored him, still crying.

“Girls-"

“Girls it’s okay; get off me-" Still nothing.

With a sigh and some magic, Forge got each of the girls off of him, Rarity being the hardest to get off him. They looked at him with tears in their eyes and Forge felt oddly touched. " Thanks girls" He said as he turned to Tia. " Tia, we still have to morn, I also want to have a little talk with your guards in a few days. Are you going for get my smithy set up before I get to Forge’s Town?" Celestia gave him a small smile and she wrapped him and Luna in a hug.

" Okay Forge, it'll take a couple of days to get the party ready." Pinkie, who appeared out of nowhere said.

"Party?" Forge turned to her and sadly smiled.

“Yes Pinkie, a mourning party, 3 days of hard partying. It’s considered one of the biggest and best party you can go to." Forge looked at Applejack and Rarity “You girls might want to send the little ones home; it’s going to be a rough couple of days.” Pinkie's smile grew 10 times that day as she hopped around him.

" CanIgoIwanttogotothissuperawsomepart-" Forge clamped his hand over mouth.

"Calm down for god sakes. All of you can come."

"You mean to the mourning party?" Longstrider asked as he and Reaper walked back to the group.

"Yep. Remember though girls" He told them" That you HAVE to drink or you’re not allowed to be there." The girls cocked their heads at him.

"Why wouldn't we drink, this party can't be that bad." Twilight said as the princesses and the humans chuckled.

“Let’s put it this way Ms. Sparkle" Reaper said “If you don't get Alcohol poisoning you’re not partying hard enough at one of these things........"

Busting balls

"Why are we waking them up princess?" Twilight asked her teacher as she, Applejack, and Celestia walked to the war room to wake up the humans.

Celestia smiled at her student. “Well my student" she began. “Forge and the others are always impossible when it comes to waking up. That’s why you're all wearing lead so Forge wouldn’t just throw you out with his magic and go back to sleep."

"But why do ya need me princess?" Applejack asked her. A sly smile grew on Celestia's face.

"Because of your voice dear Applejack." Celestia told her.

"What about mah voice?" a confused Applejack asked; Celestia’s smile grew.

"Well you see the boys had a drill sergeant by the name of Golden Delicious. She was an Apple like you Applejack, in fact you sound just like her, so all you need to do us yell wake up and they'll be wide awake." Applejack, who was still confused, nodded her head.

Opening the giant doors with her magic Celestia and the girls were assaulted by sounds of snoring. Longstrider was covered head to toe in blankets so you couldn't see any of him. Reaper was all over the bed, sleeping in a very weird position, snoring far louder than the other two. Forge was under a bed so all they could see is his feet sticking out. “He really doesn't sleep in beds." Twilight thought aloud.

Celestia chuckled quietly to herself. “Forge has a deep hatred of them, for a very good reason though; you need to get him to tell you the story about it. Now, would you do the honors Applejack?"

Nodding, Applejack took in a deep breath and shouted at the top of her lungs. “WAKE UP! " Almost faster than the girls could see, the 3 humans jumped out of their beds (or in Forges case, he threw his bed off him) and saluted, fear written on all of their faces.

"Ma'am!" They all yelled. Celestia tried, and failed, to stop her laughter. The humans fear turned to confusion to disgruntlement to fuck-you-and-everyone-you-ever-and-will-ever-love-you-bastard/bitch. They looked at Celestia and frowned. "That's not funny Tia, ya almost gave us heart attacks." Reaper grumbled, yawning.

"What time is it Tia?" Forge demanded, looking for his blanket so he could go back to sleep when he threw their asses out.

Celestia walked over to them, her head held in a dignified pose. "Its 8 o'clock Forge, time to get up. You have to address the guards today." Forge looked a lot happier as Celestia snapped at them with her tail. "Come on boys, shower time!" She said as she herded the grumbling and tired humans toward the royal apartments to get showers. The other 2 girls followed, giggling.

" I'ah would ah never thought Celestia the mean big sister type." Applejack told Twilight. Celestia overheard and chuckled. " I am their big sister, isn't that right boys? Somepony needs to get there lazy flanks up in the morning in the worst way possible."

"Eat a bucket of raw dicks Tia." Longstrider grumbled as they were guided to the showers.

As they waited for them to finish Twilight asked, "Princess, they really don't seem like soldiers. Aren't soldiers supposed to be more...... disciplined than that?"

"Trust me girls, when they're on duty you'll not see better troops. But when they’re off duty they tend to act like.... foals." Celestia told the girls as the humans walked out, washed, clothed, and teeth brushed, and ready for breakfast. They met up with the other girls and walked to the throne room to get breakfast.

The whole group, excluding Twilight and Celestia, was tired and pretty cranky as they sat down at the table. Not long after they sat down and ordered their food, a tired Luna entered the room for breakfast. She always liked to have breakfast with her family and that proved far more since her brothers were back.

Sitting between Forger and Celestia and said yawning, “Morning sister, brothers; girls." She got a good morning from Twilight and Celestia and grumbling from the others. As they all quietly ate their breakfast the door flew open, revealing the most hated prince in Equestria, prince Blueblood.

He looked at the humans and the girls with distaste. "Aunty.... What are these... things doing here eating in the royal dining hall?" He looked at the other girls and gasped. “Why are commoners sitting at our royal table?”

Celestia was about to answer when Forge said, " Who's this queer Tia and whys he being a dick?"

Blueblood took offence. " What did you call me beast?" He demanded.

Forge, who didn't look up from his breakfast said, "I called you a queer, you know, a colt cuddlier, a fudge packer, a homo. Christ Tia, is this guy gay and hard of hearing?"

Rainbow, the 2 humans, Applejack, and even Luna laughed. Forge won Rarity’s heart, and all of the other girls, except Celestia, (she was just smiling) gasped. Blueblood's blood boiled. Pulling a glove out of nowhere, he threw it at Forge, who looked bored.

" How dare you monster!" an angery Blueblood said " I challenge you to a duel!" Luna and the humans quietly giggled and the 6 girls gasped at the seriousness of the situation, but Forge just yawned and looked at Blueblood.

"Fine, how about at 5 in the courtyard, I have something to do today already so I can kill two birds with one stone."

Blueblood was baffled by the human’s calmness to the whole situation. "Okay.... name the weapons!"

Forge yawned again, eating some more of his cereal " Whatever you want big boy."

"It’s Prince Blueblood you filth!"

"That’s a long ass name... Well good day Princess Bluebloodyouflith." The girls nervously laughed and a furious Blueblood left, slamming the doors behind him. Forge snorted and finished his orange juice and cereal. “Nobles.... Tia, did he call you aunty? Does that mean that dick is my nephew?"

“Yes."

“Why are my nephew’s dumb assholes Tia?"

"They're not that bad Forge..."

"Really? Bec- O look, Chrissy decided to grace us with her company." Forge said as Chrysalis entered the throne room and ordered pancakes.

She yawned and looked at the humans, then the princesses, and then the girls and the fillies. She could tell that there was something wrong by sensing their emotions. “What happened?" She asked, a still giggling Longstrider answered her.

"Nothing really, Forgey just was challenged to a duel."

That perked her interest. “Really?" The 6 girls looked at Forge nervously.

“Darling" Rarity said, “you may not know this but prince Blueblood is a master swordsmen."

“Ya” Rainbow said, “You could really get hurt."

“He hasn't been beaten when he's using-" Rarity said but Forge interrupt her.

" - he uses a long sword, about 4 feet long. He favors his right side when he swings and he prances around like a fairy when he fights, is that about right?"

The girls looked at him confused. "How did you know that? You've never met that meanie pants!" Pinkie excitedly said. Forge shrugged. “It comes with forging weapons. Don't worry I'll be fine girls. He's getting his shit wrecked" Forge looked at Celestia expectantly.

“Tia, what can I do to my nephew, pain wise?"

“Nothing, just rough him up a little" Forge looked sad.

"Why?! He probably really needs an ass whoppin' Can I at least knock some teeth out?" He gave her his best puppy dog eyes.

"*sigh* Fine."

Forge cheered and ran around the table, making the 3 fillies laugh.

2 Hours later.....

"Are you sure that it's okay for you to take those stiches out?" Fluttershy asked as the 6 girls and Chrissy stood around Forge, who was waiting for Reaper to take his stiches out. Longstrider was playing hide and seek with the 3 fillies and losing badly.

"Yes Mrs. Fluttershy, our bodies heal a lot faster than you ponies. Alright get these out Reaper; I got stuff to do today."

"What am I getting them out with, my blades?" Forger snorted.

"Longstrider, stop sucking at hide and seek for a second and open my container." Longstrider’s head popped out from a closet and he did as Forger asked; grumbling the whole way. When it opened Forge reached his hand out and muttered something. Faster than the girls could see a slivery object flew to his hand and wrapped around his arm.

Twilight looked at the substance around Forges arm, amazed. It looked like some kind of metal but it was flowing like water. "What is that?" She asked, her eyes the size of dinner plates

She asked Forge, who looked up at her. "This is my masterpiece, Quicksilver. I can make it form into anything I want, it’s almost indestructible, and is utterly at my command."

Twilight's eyes grew even wider as some of the Quicksilver pooled in Forges hand and formed into scissors, which Forge gave to Reaper, who started to take his stiches out. Her mind raced, she was almost excited as a filly that just got out of school for the summer. She tried to control herself and almost failed. The amount of research for something like that almost boggled the mind. As calmly as she could, Twilight asked, “How is it made?"

Forge laughed, “That, my dear niece, is a secret.”

Twilight couldn't control herself; she was bucking tired that her thirst for knowledge was not being quenched by the humans. Using her magic she grabbed the rest of the Quicksilver off of Forges arm and ran out of the room. As Celestia was her witness she was going to learn everything about this Quicksilver, for SCIENCE! Before she got out the door though the Quicksilver snaked down to her legs and coiled around her, making her fall to the ground with an thud. Reaper and Forge were laughing their asses off.

“One...... does not simply take Quicksilver from Forge.” A laughing Reaper said as the Quicksilver flew back into Forges hand. Twilight looked at the ground, ashamed of her actions. Forge looked at her with sympathy in his eyes. "It's alright Twilight, if it makes you feel better you'll be getting some of the quick-" Twilight zoomed over to his, her face uncomfortably close to his.

"Really!?" She happily said.

"Yep, all of you girls are getting some; in fact I'll probably need to make some more when I get to ponyville." Twilight looked at him, giving him puppy dog eyes.

" Pweese tell me at least a little about it uncle Forge!" Forge laughed.

"It’s semi-intelligent. There, there's your birthday present."

"You're not going to get me anything else for my birthday? You're a bad uncle!" Twilight joked. Forge laughed again and patted her on the head as Reaper took the last of his stiches out.

"Fine, I'll tell you the secrets of the universe." He told her, winking.

"Really?!"

"Yep."

"Um, sugarcube, not that I'm not grateful or anything but why are we getting this stuff?" Applejack asked

“Because farmer, this stuff will help us track you if anything happens to you. Anyway this stuff really is helpful, 10,000 uses and all that, anything you need it'll form. It's going to take a couple of days to get it to form for you but you'll all love it, trust me"

“Now Twilight, I know you have some more questions for us so go ahead and ask them. Remember though, it has to be biological only." Twilight perked up and grabbed a quill and some paper. “Okay let’s start with something easy, how much do you weigh?"

The humans looked at each other and shrugged, "I think I weigh 250, Reaper maybe 190 and Longstrider's got to be 160 soaking wet." Twilight wrote down what Forge said.

"Okay, you weigh a LOT less than we do.... hummmm, so how much stronger are you than us?" Forge looked thoughtful. "2000 years ago a good bit, but I have no idea now. But we can test it. Which one of you girls is the strongest?"

"I am!" Applejack and Rainbow said at the same time. They then glared at each other as Forge laughed.

"Alrightty then you can both hoof wrestle me."

"Hoof wrestle you?" Rarity said, aghast “Why would you do such a barbaric thing?"

"Well Miss Rarity it’s the best way you can tell how strong somepony is; ready girls?" He said as he walked over to the table. Rainbow Dash flew into the chair, sticking her tongue out at Applejack, who frowned.

“You ready to lose big guy?" She cockily asked him, putting her hoof on the table.

"No ma'am" A grinning Forge replied, clasping his hand with Rainbows hoof; Reaper putting his hand over both of their appendages.

“Ready.......set.......go!" Reaper said, moving his hands away.

Rainbow put everything she had into it, fully believing that she was going to win. The humans arm didn't budge, Forge just looked thoughtful." Hummm, at least you ponies got a lot stronger, or maybe you're just really strong Miss Dash." Slowly and easily, Forge put Dash's hoof down to the table. Applejack fell over, howling with laughter at a flabbergasted Rainbow Dash.

Forge raised an eyebrow at the farmer, "What are you laughing about farmer, you're losing next." That just made her laugh harder. She was far stronger than all of the mares in ponyville and her brother was the only stallion that could beat her physically.

She plopped down on the other side of the table and Forge clasped her forehoof. “Ya ready to lose hun?" Forge just gave her his best shit eating grin as a response.

" Ready...... set" Reaper said as Applejack thought of how much force she wanted to put into the match Don't want ta hurt him or nothin' she thought as Reaper said go. Putting a decent amount of strength into it, Aj was surprised that the humans arm didn't move at all, it was like she was trying to move a mountain with her hand. She put more into it, then more, and then more until she had put everything she had into her forehoof. Still Forges arm didn't move.

Whistling, Forge said with closed eyes, " Good on you farmer, but you forgot a very important thing."

"What’s that?" Aj said through gritted teeth.

"You forgot when it comes to upper body strength; a blacksmith will beat a farmer every time." As easily as he did to Rainbow, Forge gently put Aj's forehoof on the table, beating her.

The room was deathly quiet, none of the others ever seen Applejack lose a hoof wrestling match....Ever.

Forge got up and clasped his hands together. “Alright, time to address the troops.....

In the courtyard.....

Shining Armor looked over his guards for the hundredth time. All 200 guards had been called out to the courtyard that morning to be addressed by the creature that attacked him the other night. Somehow it was the princess’s brother and he wasn't happy for a number of reasons. Speak of the devil and he shall come... Shining thought as Forge walked into the courtyard, looking as intimidating as a man in a pink shirt that says free hugs on it can be.

“Atten-ion!" A Sergeant yelled and all of the guards saluted. Forge ignored him and walked toward Shining. “Captain, let me see your 4 best fighters." Forge calmly said. Nodding he looked at the mass of troops.

“Alright... HeavySet, StormChaser, and ShieldSworn present yourselves!" Shining noticed that his sister, her friends, the princesses, the other humans, and.... her were watching everything unfold. For some reason the human had let the changeling queen out a few days ago, much to Shining’s dismay, every time he saw her he was reminded that he had failed to stop the conflict that they knew was coming.

A massive earth pony, a smaller mare, and a green Pegasus moved out of the crowd and presented themselves to Shining Armor, each of them smartly saluted. Shining saluted to Forge, “I make the 4th sir." Forge didn't look impressed. Walking toward the mass of troops and pulling out and lighting his pipe he said," First, my name is Captain Forger of the Equestrian special forces, or the Thanes." The troops nodded, they had been briefed. “Second, in two days we are having a mourning party, do all of you know what that is?" They nodded; they had one a few years ago.

“Good, now let’s have a little fun my little fillies and colts." Turning and pointing to the 4 ponies that Shining had selected he said, " Me and these 4 are going to have a little sparring match, they win I buy you all drinks" The guards cheered " but if they lose you're getting the famous Forge's yelling session. But first you need to know that you're going to be put back in basic" The guards whispered to each other as Forges eyes grew an edge to them.

“After 2000 years it seems that now it’s easy for Canterlot to be invaded" Shining flinched” So ALL of your training doesn't or didn't help you in any way. So luckily for you each of you are getting a little Thane training. Can I get a thank you Captain ?!"

“Thank you Captain!" All of the guards shouted as Forge took his pipe out of his mouth and blew a cloud of smoke." Another thing that you'll like, the officer positions are open; it’s easy to see that your officers are not qualified for their positions. Now it’s who's the best gets the best position, not who they fucking married or who they know." Shining stiffened; it was easy to see that that was thrown at him.

“Now you 4 ready to get your asses kicked?" Forge said, turning toward the 4 ponies, all 4 who got up in fighting stances, each on their hind legs, each of them about Forge's height, except HeavySet, who was about a foot taller, as they got up on back legs.

HeavySet chuckled and took a step toward Forge, “Not today Cap. I'm breaking your little monkey ass." As he took another step Forge's leg shot out, Spartan kicking HeavySet right in his stallion hood. With a very high pitched scream, HeavySet was down on all 4's a hoof holding his boys. Putting his shoulder into the big stallion, knocking him over, he turned to the other 3 and gave them a smile, showing his canines.

“Celestia save us." StormChaser said and Forge chuckled and pointed toward Celestia.

“She’s not going to help you fillies. One down and I haven't even broken a sweat, let’s try to give me a little more of a challenge, kay?" ShieldSworn and StormChaser looked and nodded at each other. Flapping her powerful wings, launching herself into the air, she flew toward a still smoking Forge as ShieldSworn charged him. Forge took his pipe out of his mouth and grinned," Double attack eh?" He flung the pipes ash into Storm's face, blinding her as Forge snatched her out of the air.

Looking right into her eyes he cocked his head back and with a loud crack head-butted her and threw the now knocked out Storm into the still charging Shield, knocking THAT mare out, both of them laying in a heap. “That’s two and three." A spell struck him in the chest and he turned toward Shining. “Now nephew" Forge said in a jokingly stern tone " that didn't work last time it isn't going to work now. Time to get your ass kicked!" He ran toward a terrified Shining, who threw more useless spells at him, Cocking back a fist and connecting painfully to his stomach, Forge laughed as Shining bent over, holding his stomach, the wind knocked out of him. “Terrible" That was the last thing Shining heard before an elbow connected against his head, knocking him out cold.

The other guards were terrified. Their 4 most feared guards were beaten with little difficulty. Forge turned toward the guards and grinned evilly. “Now it’s time for you to get chewed out."

The 2 princesses, the changeling queen, 2 humans, and 5 girls (Fluttershy didn't want to come) watched as Forge lost his mind on the guards. He brought everything from the honor of their mothers, to their effectiveness as soldiers to how shotty their armor was. Even though they were about 300 feet away they could hear everything he was saying... or shouting.

" He really has a pair of lungs" Chrysalis commented as Forge knocked the helmet off the head of a scared guard, getting very close to his face, his face red with rage, a stark contrast to how pale the stallion had gotten.

"I'M GOING TO BUTT RAPE YOU WITH THAT FUCKING HELMET, YOU STUPID PIECE OF FLY SHIT!!!

“Princess, did he hurt my brother?" Twilight asked, concerned for her brothers well-being. Celestia simply shook her head. “All of them are fine my student. They'll just have some nasty headaches when they wake up."

“I’ah never seen nothing like that." Applejack remarked, whistling to herself.

“That. Was. AWESOME!" Dash yelled. Longstrider chuckled.

“You should see me or Reaper in a fist fight; we make Forge look like a push over.”

Dash blinked. “So you’re better in a fist fight then him eh? I don’t believe you.”

Reaper joined the conversation. “It’s true, out of the 3 of us Forge is the worst at hand-to-hand combat; he’s a weapons specialist. If you don’t believe us ask Tia.” Celestia, who was listening to the conversation, nodded in agreement before she continued to watch the grade 5 shit storm Forge was giving her guards.

Rarity was fanning herself and she watched Forge intently, it looked like he was screaming, just screaming, at the top of his lungs at a poor guard. “What a barbarian!" She said to herself as she bit her lip and fanned herself faster.

“That silly really likes to yell." A bouncing Pinkie said.

It was Luna's turn to chuckle. “This is Forge's favorite thing to do. We had to make him a Captain, he refused it about 10 times; he loved being a drill sergeant." They all turned toward a smiling Forge, who was walking toward them. All of the guards looked shaken and it looked like a few had passed out in fear.

Just then, Blueblood charged out, a sword in mouth. “Now beast-" Forge walked up to him and delivered a titanic uppercut to the spoiled prince’s jaw, making him do a flip in the air and hitting the ground with a thud. "- taste my steel!" Blueblood got out as he got up; spitting teeth and falling right back down, out cold. Forge chuckled, catching the sword that shot in the air with Blueblood as he walked up to an amused Celestia and gave her a big hug, lifting her off the ground.

“Thanks for letting me do that Tia, that was fun! Now let’s go get some grub, putting the fear of god into your guards and fucking up nephews is hungry work!".......

Elsewhere….

The equine body was really a marvel, especially when that equine was a unicorn.

“Please….stop…. I-I’ll give you- AHHH!”

If you opened it up one could hardly tell the difference between them and a human; it was even harder when you opened them up. Lungs, kidneys, even the heart was almost a perfect match.

“*sob* I-I don’t want to die…”

Of course there were differences if you knew what to look for. A pony’s blood was a deeper red than a human, and there was a lot more in them, almost 9 gallons. It was the best if you wanted to paint a sunset, not to mention that it’s taste wasn’t that bad either, it was almost sweet, kind of like lemonade.

“….*gurgle*…please….I have….a wife…..a foal”

Pony’s bodies really couldn’t take the stress of torture like a human could though, usually only lasting about a day of two if you were skilled enough to keep the poor stallion or mare alive. The stallion on the table at the moment, a Mr. Spell Slinger, if the human remembered correctly, was almost spent.

After 2000 years of perfecting his craft most would say that he was good at what he did. Why would be slowly torture a poor innocent soul before killing him? Well because it was just so much darn fun!

First they would be defiant until he showed them his tools, his knives, hammers, and other goodies, then they would beg. Begging would turn to screams; that was the best part.

He swore there was something therapeutic about the whole thing.

The human looked over the bloody, dying stallion and grinned. Around him was a collection of the fella’s organs, buckets of blood at his feet; something for the troops to snack on. May as well finish this… he thought as he reached for the stallions horn.

SNAP!

The weakened stallion barely flinched as he lost his horn, his eyes becoming unfocused as his life was draining away.

Not a bad size… He thought as he walked over to his horn grinder. Most knew that unicorn horns were special, what most didn’t know is that if you ground up a unicorns horn it could be used to help increase your lifespan, something that the human had been doing for thousands of years. It tasted like shit but what are you going to do?

“Master, master!” His servant yelled, hobbling toward him.

He sat down on his couch was sipped his unicorn horn tea. “What is it slave?”

The servant bowed down low. “This one has news from our spies, your brothers are free.”

The human grinned; it was a cold, evil smile. It had been a long time… Odd that they would come when he was about to start his plan to destroy this world, no matter, even with them in the picture there was little they could do.

“Tell the troops to get ready, we’re going to have a nice little raid soon, and get rid of this.” He said, waving toward the body. The servant hobbled away and brought back two others, both as black and ugly as the other, grabbing the deceased stallion and taking it to the troops of their evening meal.

The human chuckled, turning toward his fire, swirling his drink. “So Forgey, you’re back. Good, I want to see how long you and the others last on my table.” With one last swig of his tea he threw the rest into the fire, the unicorn magic making the fire let off a menacing blue glow as the human laughed…..

Party Hardy

Celestia and Twilight were overseeing the preparations for the mourning party that was happening later that night and Twilight was stunned by the amount of alcohol that was being brought in. It looked like it was every drop of anything you could imagine; easily everything that was in Canterlot. Twilight also noticed that her teacher seemed more at ease, happier, than she had ever seen her. It looks like the princess is happy to have her family back together she thought, happy that her teacher was happy.

“Princess" Twilight said to Celestia, who turned to look down at her student with a small smile on her face

“Yes my dear student?"

“Why isn’t Forger or the one of the others here overseeing things with you?" She really was curious about that and many things about the humans. For example, apparently the humans had brought string instruments to Equestria, which was really hard to believe until the princess had stated that it was true. Forge had dryly remarked that ponies shouldn't be able to play things like the lute anyway, no fingers and all.

Celestia chuckled. She saw how much not knowing about her brothers was affecting her student. She and her sister knew quite a bit about human history, in fact everything that she and the boys had told Twilight about their oaths and the natural balance being thrown out of whack was a big lie. The only thing they couldn’t talk about was how they got their magic.

Like her, the boys loved to troll ponies; in fact they made her seem like a pony that had never trolled in her life, so they made up that little lie because they were tired of telling ponies about their history and they thought it would be fun to mess with ponies who really wanted to know about them; like her beloved student for example. In fact Celestia herself had gone over to the human dimension many times with the boys to get something or other; in fact the spell to do it was quite easy. Celestia shook her head, realizing that she was mentally rambling. She turned to answer her student.

“Well, none of the boys really have the patients for this kind of thing, right now they're probably reading they're mission reports I gave each of them." Twilight looked at her teacher in confusion. “Mission? I thought that they we're just going to guard us."

“They are, but they wanted to know more about you so I gave them information on all of you girls, everything from family history to criminal records."

“Wouldn’t it be easier for them just to ask us?" Celestia chuckled and patted her student on the head.

“They would say that it's better not to get the information from you.... I couldn't tell you why though... I'm guessing right now they are in their rooms quietly getting to know everything about you without your consent...”.....

Celestia wasn't that far off. The humans had read their reports, but now they were really bored. Being bored, for a soldier anyways, especially for soldiers that had been in and out of engagements for years like they had, was not good. Bored soldiers tend to be destructive soldiers. It didn't help that their big sister was basically the queen of a country so they could just about get away with anything they wanted. So they did what any bored little brothers with special ops training would do, looked through their big sisters stuff.

“Why did you have to bring me with you, you know if we get caught I'm probably going to get executed." Chrysalis remarked to no one in particular was the thanes looked all around Celestia's room (which they had snuck into). Longstrider chuckled, opening Celestia's cabinet.

" Chrissy you need to look in the bright side, stop being a glass half empty kind of pony, you'll be happier in the long run."

“I’m going to be the assistant to a crazy blacksmith." Chrysalis deadpanned. Forge looked up from underneath Celestia's bed insulted.

“I’m not crazy!" Reaper came out of Tia's bathroom.

“Then why did the griffins name you the crazed blacksmith, it literarily has the crazy in it you crazy fuck." He said to a frowning Forge.

“Because griffins are stupid! And you shouldn’t talk you lazy black piece of…."

As his brothers argued about Forge's state of mind, Forge’s comments becoming increasingly racists, Longstrider looked deeper into Celestia's cabinet, finding nothing but fancy pony cloths. Why does Tia need all of these fucking cloths? She's naked most of the time. He thought as he randomly knocked on the back of the cabinet. It sounded hollow. Cocking his head he pushed the back of the wall and the whole back wall slid out.

Longstrider whistled and poked his head out and said," Guys look at this shit, looks like our Tia's a big girl now. Forge; get these cloths out of here." Reaper and Forge stopped arguing and walked over with a very curios Chrysalis and Forge used his magic to get all of the cloths out of the cabinet so they could get a better look. When they did they had a wide range of reactions.Reaper fell over, holding his side laughing, Forge looked shocked, his mouth open wide, Chrysalis gave a whistle.

“Damn" She said.

For lo and behold they had found Celestia's famed dildo and other sexual things collection; dozens and dozens of neatly stacked dildos, all of them organized by size and color were in the secret compartment. Longstrider raised an eyebrow at Forge's open mouth. “Forgey, you there good buddy?" Instead of answering, Forge used his magic to grab a particular dildo and float it over for all to see. It was, pink, was veiny, and easily 5 feet long and about 6 inches round that said in big black letters DESTROYER on it. The Changeling and 3 humans gaped at it, Reaper even stopping his laughing to stare at it in awe.

Forge tried figure this thing out reasonably.

"Wait, now that ponies are bigger they probably have bigger jun-"

“Not like that" Chrysalis breathed, looking at the dildo with wonder. "Stallions are about 7 inches average." The humans looked at each other.

Then the questions started.

“Is that a fucking dildo?"

“Where does she put it?"

“That can't be a dildo; she has to use this thing to beat ponies to death."

“I guess we have to face it fellas" Forge said. “Our sisters a whore." All 3 humans looked serious for about 5 seconds then they fell over laughing. Wiping a tear from his eye Forge showed Chrysalis the true meaning of evil, little brother style. “We have to ‘fuck’ Tia over with these.".......

Later that day......

Forge was escorting Applejack and Rainbow to the courtyard to finally see who was the fastest flyer; Dash or Longstrider. Forge thought it was a stupid fucking idea and was telling Dash this as they walked through the castle.

“You’re not going to win."

“I am THE Rainbow Dash, the fastest flier in Equestria, he's going down!" Forge sighed.

“Fine, you're going to be the fastest flyer in Equestria, you’re going to be captain of the Wonderbolts, blah blah blah." Rainbow looked up at him as Applejack laughed.

“How did you know that I wanted to be in the Wonderbolts?" Forge shrugged.

“Since we're guarding you, we got info on you, from your hopes and dreams to your favorite color..... O and your criminal records, somepony likes to get in fights eh Dash?" Both of the girls thought that it was kinda creepy that the humans knew so much about them when Rainbow remembered that Forge said she needed protecting.

“Hey! I don't need anybody protecting me! Get that softy Applejack over there and protect her!" Applejack glared at her friend.

“Shoot Dash, yer about as tough as Fluttershy." Rainbow turned around and looked at Aj.

“What did you say?"

"I'ah said-" Forge chuckled, stopping the beginnings of a fight.

"You girls really are a...... aggressive couple." He remarked as both of them turned beat red.

"We're not going out!" Rainbow almost yelled.

"Ya, I'ah don't like mares like that anyway!" Aj said, jumping in to defend her sexuallity. Forge raised an eyebrow, looked both of the girls in the eye, and sighed.

"Looks like you aren't, damn I owe Reaper 10 bits." He said, muttering the last part.

"What was that last part?" Aj asked, eyebrow raised this time.

"Nothing!..... Anyway is Miss Fluttershy going to be in the courtyard?"

"Ya why?" A confused Dash asked.

"It's just we really haven't gotten to talk to her." Forger explained both mares nodded their heads in understanding.

“Sorry about that sugar, it’s just Fluttershy is..... Well shy."

“She’s just a scaredy pony." Rainbow said as Forge cocked his head at her and snorted.

“She’s the bravest one of you girls."

“What?!" Both Dash and Aj say at the same time. Their shy friend had been called any things but brave wasn't one of them. Before they could argue, Forge continued.

“The only time you are brave is when you're afraid, Miss Fluttershy is scared all the time, but she still goes out and faces her fears every day." Rainbow snorted.

“Says the guy in the free hugs shirt; seriously how many of those shirts do you have?" Forge gave her the finger.

“Fuck you, who doesn't like hugs? Pinkie enjoys when I wear these." It was true. She took the shirt literary, hugging him every chance she got.

“Go make out with Rarity." Dash said as Forge stiffened, fear in his eyes. Aj smacked her friend lightly on the head.

“Dang it Dash! Ya know Forge's scared of mares." Both of the mare’s snorted back laughter as Forge growled.

“40 years of being a soldier and I get stuck guarding the 'funny' ponies."

Both of the girls looked at him." How old are ya Hun?" Applejack asked as Forge looked thoughtful.

“64, 67? Somewhere between there, if you don't count the 2000 years of being frozen." Both of the girls sputtered and Rainbow nudged him.

“You’re looking pretty spry for an old colt." Forge grinned.

“I age like backwards dog years, right now my bodies about 21; give or take. Now come on, it’s time for you to lose Rainbow Crash." Both Aj and Forge laughed, Dash frowning as they made it out of the courtyard where the rest of the girls, the fillies, the princesses, and the other 2 humans waited, Longstrider wearing a shit-eating grin.

“Ready to lose?" Longstrider asked Dash as she walked up to him

She flapped her wings and walked at the starting line. “Buck you, if you have wings get'em out and get ready to lose." Longstrider laughed as he took off his shirt and tossed it to Reaper as Forge and Aj walked over to the group. Grunting and arching his back his wings shot out of his back, making the 3 fillies and 6 mares gasp, and what wings they were. Raven black and with a 30 foot span they were almost as large as Celestia's. Flapping them a few times he sighed.

“That’s just what the doctor ordered, alright how about we go 5 miles out and back, first one that makes it back first wins." Dash grunted, not bothering a reply as Reaper walked between them and started to count down. “5, 4-" As he was counting down Forger grinned as he leaned over to Twilight.
“Hey niece" He said, Twilight turning toward him, head cocked. “Wanna make a bet? Longstrider loses I tell you how I make quicksilver" Her ears perked up. “He wins you have to-" He leaned over and whispered in her ear, she sputtered.

“What?!" She whispered to him.

“Come on, it’s not that bad! Imagine if your girl wins."

Twilight thought it over as Forge's Quicksilver floated over from one arm to the other. He did say he was going to give her some so she could study it, but she wouldn't ALL of the information about it. Then there's Rainbow, how's probably the fastest Pegasus in all of Equestria. After calculating that the odds were in her favor, she nodded and brought her hoof up. “Sure." Forge grinned and clasped her hoof and shook. They both turned around as Reaper counted down to one.

"-one." Dash took off as Longstrider just stood there, smiling. what is he- Twilight thought as Longstrider flapped his wings, he took off after her. “Hey Twilight" A smiling Forge said. “How fast do you think Rainbow fly’s when she does a sonic rainboom?" Twilight tapped her hoof to her chin in contemplation as she watched the 2 flyers were flying back, both of them being neck and neck. There was a loud boom as Twilight saw Dash reach a sonic rainboom. Twilight smiled, she was going to win.

“About Mach 2 why?" Forge giggled. Before Twilight's eyes Longstrider was covered in a green aura.

“Because" He said as somehow Longstrider was forming a spiral behind him, the clear sign that somepony was about to break the sound barrier. “Longstrider can break Mach 5." To Twilight's horror there was a loud boom as Longstrider flew past a surprised Dash. The distance between them grew, Dash trying her best to not make it so, from a few feet to a quarter of a mile. With a powerful flap and a jolly face, Longstrider landed as the group cheered. Twilight groaned and Forge patted her on the back and laughed. “It’s okay Twily."

She looked up at him hopeful. “Does that mean that I don't have to do it?"

“You can't weasel out of this one young lady."

“*sigh* I was afraid you'd say that.".......

Forge and Celestia walked side by side down the hall Celestia's wing over the human. They were both walking toward the throne room to go to the mourning party. While they walked Forge was partaking in one of his favorite past times; bitching.

" We're guarding a dare devil, a librarian with a bad case of OCD, an apple farmer, a pony that at any given time bends physics over and fucks it up the ass, a fashion designer, and a pony that is scared, literary, scared of her own shadow? There's a joke in this somewhere...." Celestia smiled to herself and used her wing to bring her brother closer.

All of those sleepless nights, the guilt and the pain she had of accidentally sealing away her family, was finally gone. She was happy, truly, fully happy. She still found it very surprising that they had forgiven her so easily, a point that when she brought it up was met with laughter.

Celestia looked down at her brother and gave him a look of fake scorn, " Now Forger, all of my little ponies are special and don't deserve to be made fun of." Forge looked up at her and shrugged. “Says you.... Hey since I got you here and you can't run away from me I need to tell you about your dick nephew.

Celestia rolled her eyes. “Which one?"

“The one that I put in the hospital." She huffed.

" You put them both in the hospital." Forge smiled.

" I guess I did....the one that can still talk."

"Shining Armor?"

".....Sure...... anyway you really expect that when you put a guy in the hospital they hate you, but nooooo, I am now this motherfucker’s idol. I swear to god if I stay still too long he's going to jump on my dick. You need to calm him the fuck down."

Celestia chuckled and patted him on the head. “Silly Forge, I'm a princess; I don't need to do anything!"

" You know, the lunar republic sounds like a better name for Equestria, I'm sure Luna would like that when I tell her she's the new queen." Celestia chuckled again.

“I love you too." she said, kissing him on the top of the head as he growled.

They made it to the big giant doors and they both heard what sounded like any ponies chatting to each other. Forge and Celestia looked at each other, both with sly looks on their faces.

“Remember not to get too shitfaced to fast Tia. You ponies never could hold your drink." Celestia chuckled.

“Shut up ya big monkey and open the door for your big sister."

Forge chuckled and opened the door as about 500 ponies turned toward them, all of them becoming silent. Forge smiled as Luna waved at him and he turned and walked to the tables, all of the ponies following. After singling them to sit down they waited as they all were given beers. While they were waiting Twilight looked over to Forge.

" What are we going to do here?" Pinkie answered, she had spent days studying about mourning parties, after all she was the party pony.

" We're going to be drinking silly!" Pinkie said, practically jumping up and down her seat. “There’s also the party games, axe throwing, wrestling, and lots of other fun stuff!"

Forge looked at her surprised. " That’s right Pinkie. Someponies been studying." Pinkie beamed as Forge was handed a beer. Standing up and raising his mug the others mimicked him.

" To the honored dead! To our passed loved ones, to our brothers, sisters, lovers, sons, daughters, all of those that are no longer with us." All of them raised their glasses and poured some on the floor. After some silence Forge brightened. Slamming his mug on the table he said," Enough of the sappy shit! Bring in the center piece!"

Center piece? Celestia thought as the doors opened again as Celestia saw it the center piece.

Needless to say Celestia shat a brick.

It was about 10 feet tall, looked like a multi-stacked cake, and had every one of her..... friends on them. Her particular favorite, the destroyer, was on the top. Celestia and Forge were standing side by side both of them looked at this thing, Forge with a grin plastered on his face and the princess’s eye twitching.

“Forge?"

"Yes sweet sister?" Forge said, fluttering his eyes at her.

"You're going to the moon." Forge gasped and put his hands to his heart, trying his best to look hurt.

"Why would you do that sweet sister?"

"Because you made this thing and it says Celestia' dildo collection on it." Forge looked at the multi colored letters that he painted on the thing that day; hell the paint probably was still wet, and pouted.

"It pains me to hear you-"

"Buck you" She said, cutting him off as she looked around, ready to do damage control.

What she saw didn't encourage her.

Her brothers and sister were on the floor laughing so hard they were crying. Twilight looked like she was about to break again, and the other girls, except Pinkie, who was hopping up and down, had their mouths open, along with the other guards. Forge clasped his hands together, still trying to look innocent, and said," Alright! Enough funny business time to party!"

An unknown amount of time later....

Celestia opened an eye and groaned, holding her head with both hooves, her head hurt so bad! She looked at her surroundings; she was no longer in the throne room. Where am I? All I remember is that we ran out of rum and we went to get some more...... On no! I hope Luna's alright… this is her first time drinking at one of these things after all. A groan was heard to her left and right, and to her relief to was her sister and Longstrider.

"Sister" Luna whined, getting up shakily to her hooves. "What happened?”

“The fucking party happened." Longstrider moaned, getting up. Despite their own pain the 2 sisters giggled. Celestia gave a grateful sigh; luckily they were only in the courtyard, which was filled with passed out guards. As they entered the throne room they all flinched, it looked like a war zone. Ponies upon drunken ponies were lying on top of each other. As they looked around they found Forge and the elements of harmony.

Much to the 3's amusement all 6 girls and a certain changeling queen were laying on top of a sleeping Forger, Rarity snuggled against him, hooves wrapped around his chest with a content smile on her face. Longstrider chuckled evilly. “Forgey’s going to shit a brick when he wakes up." The other princesses nodded in agreement. Then Luna asked the question that everyone was thinking.

“Where’s Reaper?"

“Over here." They turned and saw Reaper, looking no worse for wear and holding a cup of coffee. “I did that to the big guy over there." He said, gesturing to Forger. “Miss Rarity got huggy though." They chuckled but winced because of splitting headaches. “Come on “Celestia said, using a wing to shield herself from her beloved sun.” Let’s get some coffee."

As they walked to the kitchen they heard a yelp and a lot of something’s crashing to the ground that followed by moans and a rapid stream of apologies. Celestia smiled as they continued to walk to the kitchens, at her brother’s predicament making her day.......

Author's Note

NEW COVER ART YAYYYYY

Any landing you survive is a good landing

"Are you sure this stuff is safe?" Twilight asked Forge.

Today was the day that Twilight had been waiting for. She was going to get, along with the other girls, Quicksilver. The said substance was in 6 small puddles right next to the girls. Forge had insisted that it was perfectly safe but it didn't help that him and the other 2 humans were hiding behind a wall like the stuff was about to explode.

Forge popped his head out from the safety of the wall and nodded. “Yep. You’ll be perfectly safe, just step on the Quicksilver and it'll do the rest."

"Wouldn't it hurt?" A scared Fluttershy asked.

"No Miss Fluttershy, it'll just feel.... funny. Now come on girls we haven't got all day, I'm sure you want to get home." The girls looked at each other and then at the Quicksilver. Surprisingly the first one to step on their puddle was Fluttershy. All of the girls quickly backed away and Forge ducked back down.

Luckily for them Fluttershy didn't blow up. The Quicksilver just swirled around her hoof, ran all around her body and started to float around her head. Fluttershy giggled. “It tickled." She told the relief-ridden girls. Forge peeked back up from the wall and grinned.

"See perfectly safe! Come on ya scaredy ponies, step on your puddles!" Dash and Aj looked at each other, embarrassed that Fluttershy was braver than them, and stepped on their puddles at the same time, both of them giggling from the process. This prompted the other girls to do the same. After they all finished Forge and the other humans came out of their hiding place.

"Good it worked!" Forge happily said, looking at each of the girls Quicksilver for any signs of problems. Rainbow looked at Forge angrily.

"Are you saying that you had no idea what this stuff was going to do to us?!" Forge didn't looked at her as he replyed, checking Twilight's quicksilver as it floated around her.

"Yep."

"Thank god what happened to the last pony didn't happen to you. Celestia wouldn't let Forge hear the end of it." Reaper said. The girls cocked their heads at him.

Longstrider was happy to elaborate. “Forge tried to bind Quicksilver to a mare. She exploded twice." He made a blowing up motion with his hands.

“WHAT?!" The girls yelled.

Longstrider continued. “Yep, you should of seen it. The poor bitch blew up, then reformed, then blew up again.”

The girls looked angrily at Forge, who threw his hands up in surrender. “Alright alright! I'm sorry for putting your lives in danger! Can you forgive an old- OW!"

After the girls each got their hits on Forge, who complained loudly at being beaten for just a little mistake. They took a good look at their Quicksilver, all 6 of which were floating all around them. Their anger sated they all wanted to know how the stuff worked. Aj, ever tactful, said, "How in the hay does this stuff work?"

Forge looked up from rubbing his bruised head and answered. “Just tell it what to do, it'll do the rest."

Pinkie jumped up and down, excited," Omygosh! Why don't you change into a balloon, or a jump rope, or maybe-" Before she could finish her quicksilver flew into her mouth, shutting her up. Forge chuckled.

“Like I said this stuff is semi-aware, I guess you were irritating it Pinkie." Pinkie tried to speak but it didn't make any sense with the Quicksilver still in her mouth. Forge just shrugged and continued.

“Now girls this stuff might... mess, that's the word... with you emotions a little. You might get some mild mood swings, nothing that a little self- control can't prevent." The girls nodded and Dash flew up in the air, excited.

"O man! I can't wait to use this stuff to help me with my tricks! I'll make the Wonderbolts for sure!" Forge smiled.

"If anything can help you that'd be it; fair warning girls, this stuff has a limited amount of power to it, you use it too long and it'll just wrap around your leg until you recharge it with the sun or the moon's rays. Understood?" The all nodded and kept playing around with their Quicksilver.

Across the castle Celestia, Luna, and Chrysalis were talking about the changeling queen's punishment in the form of the worse kind imaginable, working for Forge.

"You see, with Forge you have to constantly have to keep on your toes or you'll..... Well you'll be hurting afterward. So you’re pretty much Forge's assistant, voice of reason, and babysitter." Chrissy snorted.

"It can't be that bad working for him, can it?" The two princesses looked at each other and shivered.

"Thou have no idea." Luna fearfully said to her as Celestia handed her a big book.

"This is all you need to know about Forge, remember not to let him work more than 5 days without sleeping. Bad things happen if you don't. And another thing-"

Chrissy slowly tuned Celestia out as they walked down the endless hallways to the courtyard where they were met with an odd sight. Pinkie was bouncing around on a silver pogo stick, laughing hysterically, Twilight was writing notes on the floating metal in front of her, Dash was trying to outrun her floating metal and failing, Rarity was looking into a mirror that was floating all on its own, Applejack was trying to keep some of the floating metal away from her hat, and Fluttershy was trying to hide from her's.

Celestia's eye twitched, she knew what the metal was, and she couldn't help specifically remembering telling Forge not to give the girls Quicksilver. And speak of the devil; Forge strolled in the courtyard with a big grin on his face. "Ladies." He said, tipping his imagery hat to them. Celestia responded with a hoof to his head.

"OW! What the fuck was that for?!"

"What did I tell you about binding Quicksilver to them?"

"But-"

"But nothing! You're supposed to protect them, not try to kill them!" Forge shrugged.

“At least it worked.... Would it make it better if I said I was sorry?" Celestia put a hoof to her chin in thought.

“hmmmmm….” WACK.

As Celestia chewed forge out, Reaper and Longstrider walked out with rope a lot of rope. “Ready to go everypony?" Longstrider cheerfully asked, interrupting Forge getting ripped a new asshole.

When Forge saw the rope he groaned and Celestia and Luna snickered. “What’s the rope for?" Pinkie asked, still bouncing on the pogo stick. Longstrider turned to her and grinned.

“This is what's getting us home Ms. Pie. Ponyville's-"

“Forge’s Town." Forge interrupted

“Whatever. Its 10 miles away right from here right Tia?" Celestia's grin got bigger.

"The old swan dive Longstrider? Wouldn't it be easier to take a chariot to Ponyville?"

"Yes it would!" Forge yelled. Reaper snickered, walking over to Forge and nudging him with a shoulder.

"What's wrong buddy? Scared of a few thousand feet of open air?"

"You know that's not the reason!" Forge said, frowning.

"Um. I'm sorry to stop... This" Rarity said, gesturing to them. “But what is a swan dive?" The 2 humans and princesses snickered while Forge dawned a frown.

"You'll see Miss Rarity." Longstrider cryptically said as he tied the thin rope to an arrow and got his bow out. Walking to the edge of the courtyard where Ponyville was easy to spot he motioned for everyone to step back. Taking a wide stance he pulled the arrow back. "You girls might want to look away." He advised as the arrow glowed green.

"Clear!" Reaper yelled.

“Clear!” Forge half-heartily yelled.

"Fire in the hole!" Longstrider yelled as everyone looked away.

There was a deafening boom as the arrow shot thought the air at Mach 6, reaching the outskirts of Ponyville and lodging in a tree in seconds. The other end of the rope was tied down and was tested to see if it would hold a humans weight. By then a chariot was in the courtyard and all of the girls were herded into it.

The Reaper pulled out 3 hooks and handed one to Longstrider and tried to hand on to Forge, who refused it. “I’m not taking that; I'll just ride with the chariot." Longstrider snorted.

“Did you forget to put a tampon in this morning woman?" Forge narrowed his eyes at Longstrider.

"How many times have we done this?"

"26" Longstrider responded without missing a beat.

"And how many times have I gotten hurt because of it?"

".....26."

"That's fucking right!" Celestia figured now was the time to ruin Forge's day.

“There’s no room in the chariot Forge." Forge glared at Celestia, who fluttered her eyelashes at him.

Sighing, he took the hook, his shoulders slumped. “Fine… but whatever gets damaged is your fault Tia"

After their goodbyes, Longstrider took a running start and jumped off the ledge, hooking the rope he laughed like a madman, zooming down to ponyville. Next was Reaper who did a flip in the air before doing the same thing. Lastly was Forge who hugged each of his sisters in turn. “Goodbye Tia, goodbye Lulu. You girls come down and visit now ya hear?”

He hugged Luna close. “Little one, don’t be mad at your sister.” Luna stiffened.

“We- I forgave her for sending me to the moon, I deserved it, but you? No- I” Forge hugged her tighter.

“O little one, Tia hasn’t stopped beating herself for her mistakes. Now no but’s, make your peace with our sister.” Luna sighed and wrapped her wings around him, wrapping him in as tight of a hug as possible.

“I will. I promise.” Forge chuckled and broke the hug and messed up her mane. Turning to a smiling Celestia he wrapped her in another hug.

“I missed this.” Celestia said sighing, also wrapping her wings around him. “Why aren’t so guys mad at me I messed up, I-

“Forge clamped her mouth shut and looked sternly up at her.

“Now Tia, we forgave you, quite beating yourself up about it!” She smiled warmly down at him and nuzzled him.

“Remember Forge, no making golems.” Forge huffed.

“But I’m so close to-“

“Forge.”

“*sigh* Fine.” Forge broke the hug and looked up at her.

“Hey Tia, did you remember to tell you student about that spell?" Celestia tapped a hoof to her face and chuckled.

“No I forgot, Twilight, my faithful student!" Celestia called as Forge hooked the rope and flew down with his brothers. Twilight bounded to her teacher as fast as her hooves could carry her.

"Yes princess?"

"I needed to show you a spell that would help you protect yourselves from the effects of Forge’s pheromones." Touching her horn to her students she used a memory spell so she could do it without having to spend the long hours perfecting it. After Twilight tried it out on herself she nuzzled her teacher and promised to use the spell on the other girls when she got to ponyville....

5000 feet in the air......

This isn't so bad. forge thought as he zoomed to ponyvillemaybe all of those times were flukes. Just then he
heard the sound of steel starting to break. Forge groaned, he didn't have to guess what was about to snap. Looking sadly up to the sky Forge said," Why god why?"

SNAP!

Just then Forge's hook snapped, sending the human in a free fall thousands of feet in the air. Also, as luck would have it the wind picked up, sending Forge flying past his brothers, both of which weren’t least bit surprised that something like this would happen. As he flew toward Ponyville, going about 200 miles per hour, Forge first prayed to Tittyshit's, the patron saint of when bad shit happens that you know are going to happen but you get roped into doing that stupid thing by your asshole siblings. Then he bellowed at the top of his lungs, “Longstrider, for fuck's sake, slow me down!" He then curled up into a ball and willed the little bit of Quicksilver that he had left to protect himself the best he could.

Longstrider chuckled and enveloped him in his magic, so when he hit the ground he was only going 60 miles per hour, instead of 200. Not that it hurt any less.

Forge hit the ground like a rag doll, bouncing right back up through the air, swearing the whole time and leaving a nice sized crater in Sweet Apple acres as he flew toward town...

Right at the same time, Lyra and Bon Bon, were having their daily discussion (most of the ponies in town called it an argument but whatever...) about Lyra's favorite and Bon Bon's least favorite subject, humans.

" For buck's sake Lyra, human's do.not. exist! There is no proof they ever existed, and your dreams don't count as evidence! You think that one day a "human" is just going to fall out of the sky. That's never-"

“Get outta the way you stupid fucking ponies!"

Lyra and Bon Bon looked up, and lo and behold Forge flew down, smashing through their table, and going through the wall and into the house of Vinyl Scratch and Octavia.

“50 shades of FUCK ME THAT HURT!...”

Lyra looked smugly at her roommate. “I’d like an apology now if you don't mind." She said to Bon Bon, whose jaw was on the floor...

Forge groaned, his eyes closed. If you don't open your eyes then the pain wouldn't come. He thought to himself. Ya it's work- Oooo fuck me I was wrong, so WRONG! He groaned again an opened an eye to see where he was. It looked like a nice living room, or at least it was. The whole hole-in-the-wall thing had now ruined the whole flow of the place. To make matters worse Forge had broken the support beam of the house and the whole thing was about to fall on him.

"What the buck is that?!"

...and apparently the residences of the house as well...

Shooting up and lifting the collapsing ceiling with a grunt, Forge saw the ponies whose house that he accidently broke. One was a mare with a white coat, electric blue mane, and the reddest eyes that Forge had ever seen. The other was also a mare with a black man, grayish coat, violet eyes, and an adorable little bow tie around her neck.
Both of them were wrapped in bath robes, and with a quick look around Forge saw that there were used tissues all around the place, which brought Forge to the conclusion that the 2 were sick. It is also important to note that both of them had weapons in their hooves, the white one had a broom and the other had… Is that a cello? Forge thought as he tried to think is a way to diffuse the situation without getting the shit beaten out of him.

“Ladies, nice weather isn’t it?” He said weakly.

He got the reaction he was expecting.

Both of the mares screaming charged Forge, makeshift weapons raised. He took the cello across the face and the broom in his already probably broken ribs.

“Ow. Ladies stop for- OW!- a second and-OW!” Sighing he lowered the ceiling that he was still holding a little. The house groaned and shifted slightly, causing the mares to freeze, both in mid-strike.

“That’s better…. now I’m sure you’re mad that I broke your house but can you attack me later? When I’m not holding up about 5 tons of death above your heads?” The one with the red eye glared at him angrily and hit him again.

“You bucking stupid monster!” She said in a nasally voice, probably because she couldn’t breathe out of her nose. “Look at our house! Filthy Rich is going to make us pay for the bucking thing and we can barely afford the rent in this place now!”

“… Well that made me feel bad.” Forge told the mares.

“You should feel bad you ruffian!” The other pony said in a refined voice. “Crashing through other ponies things; didn’t your mother teach you better?!” Forge couldn’t help but chuckle.

“Look how about we argue about how badly I was raised in-“

“Are you dead in their Forgey?!” Longstrider called, poking his head in the hole in the wall. He got a wacked in the face by a pissed off DJ as a response.

“OOOWWW! What the fuck was that for?! Vinyl hefted the broom again, her red eyes burning with rage.

“Get the buck outta here monster! One of you thingy’s already broke our house no-“Forge groaned as he strained against the weight of the house.

“Hey Longstrider” He said “Could you give me a hand here? This house is really heavy.” Longstrider walked around Forge and tried to touch the ceiling but couldn’t, he was about 4 inches too short.

“No can do Forgey, you’re the only one big enough to reach the ceiling. Can’t you use your magic to lift the house?” Forge groaned.

“No there’s lead all though the house.” Longstrider whistled.

“That sucks buddy.”

“Fuck you. If you assholes didn’t make me do that swan dive everything would be fine right now, but noooo! I smash though a house, breaking at least 3 ribs in the process, get my ass beat by the owners of said house, and have to have a long ass conversation while I’m holding up said fucking house!” Longstrider smiled weakly.

“At least you’re meeting ponies.”

“…….” Forge honestly didn’t know how to answer that, so instead he sighed and looked at the 2 mares.

“You ladies might want to get anything you don’t want crushed out of the house. I can hold this house up for a few minutes.” The mares looked at each other and nodded as Forge looked at Longstrider. “Help’em out Longstrider, since it’s pretty much your fault that their house is broken anyway, and get Reaper’s black ass in here too he can help.” Longstrider saluted and walked outside where there was quite a sizeable group of ponies were gathering outside Vinyl and Octavia’s house.

He looked Vinyl and Octavia, both of which were still holding their weapons. “Now girls just get the things you need, I promise you will be reimbursed for everything else.” They both nodded and went through the house, showing Longstrider and Reaper everything that needed to be taken out…

20 minutes later…..

“What and the hay happened here?” Twilight asked as their chariot landed in Ponyville. There was a large group of ponies near her neighbor’s house, along with a mountain of instruments and DJ equipment that was neatly stacked a safe distance from the house. The said house was swaying dangerously, looking like it was about to fall any minute.
As they trotted over to see what was happening, Longstrider walked out of the front door carrying a large speaker. “Longstrider” Twilight said, all of them racing toward him.” What happened?” He put the speaker down and chuckled. “Forge took a little spill a few thousand feet up and smashed through a house.” The girls gasped and Chrysalis chuckled at her boss’s misfortune.

“O my goodness is he alright?” Fluttershy asked, ready to bolt into the house to give him medical attention. Reaper came out with Octavia, both of them carrying boxes full of stuff.

“He’s just got a few broken ribs; maybe a broken ankle. He’ll pull through.” The girls peeked inside and saw Forge holding up the house. Aj whistled.

“Has he been holding that house the whole time? Shoot that must be a lotta weight!”

“Ya it fucking is!” Forge yelled in from the house….

Back in the house Forge was sweating his balls off, every muscle in his body screaming in pain. Apparently a few things consisted of everything in the fucking house. Thankfully Vinyl was taking the last thing out, one of her favorite wub’s.
“Can you hurry up and take that speaker out ma’am?” Forge groaned.” I can’t hold this house up for much longer.” Vinyl looked at him and huffed.

“This isn’t a speaker! It’s a wub!” Forge looked the wub over.

“What’s the difference?” Vinyl huffed again and looked away from him. Forge grinned.

“I’m sorry ma’am” He said. “I didn’t mean to ‘wub’ you the wrong way.” He chuckled at his own joke and was rewarded with a smack in the ribs from Vinyl.

Wincing, Forge said,” Watch the ribs!” Vinyl giggled.

“You’re alright for a monster. And no more of that ma’am stuff, the names Vinyl.” Forge smiled and nodded a head at her.

“Name’s Forge, nice to meet you Vinyl; now get outta here so I can bring down the house.” They both chuckled at the bad joke as Vinyl got outside and a safe distance away from the house.

“Reaper is everypony outta the way?” He called.

“Yep!”

With a grunt and his last bit of strength, Forge threw the whole top of the house up a bit, making a beeline for the door as it came crashing down. He got out of the way as the house came down with a crash, bust and debris shooting out, creating a cloud of dust.

Gasping for air and on all 4’s, Forge grinned to himself. At least that- He heard the sound of a lot of ponies sniffing the air. Forge froze, realizing that he was drenched in his own sweat with a large group of females around him. Losing all of his coloring he looked up. All of the ponies, female and even a few males, all except Twilight, Vinyl, the two humans, (both of whom were watching the whole scene with amusement) and Octavia were looking hungrily at Forge with bedroom eyes.

“Fuck me with a rusty spear.” Forge muttered as he looked at his niece, knowing that he was too tired and hurt too badly to make a successful escape, and also knowing that Celestia has taught her the spell that would save his ass from a molesting. “TWILIGHT!” Forge bellowed in fear. “SAVE ME!”

….We will not coerce with something that surrounds itself with demons creature. You killed 2 of my kin; pray to whatever gods you follow that I didn’t catch you.If I ever have the displeasure of seeing you again your skulls my new drinking cup.

The human sighed, throwing the letter into the fire. That could of gone better he thought as he got up and walked into the big cavern that held his army. He looked down at the mass of black bodies and smiled.

From his vantage he could spy the red of fires that the forges were producing, each of them churning our various weapons of death. A little past those there was a large group of goblins circled around what looked to be 2 chieftains fighting, both of them screaming curses at each other in their rough tongue.

He sighed to himself; his hoard were getting bored, the enemy of discipline. Humming to himself, the human walked over to the ring and pushed through the mass of bodies. When he got to the front he took a second to admire both of the hulking goblins.

Both of them were bare chested, showing the red tattoos that signified their statue as chiefs. Both of them were about a foot taller than the normal goblins with huge hulking frames that showed bodies riddled with scars. To the humans surprise the smaller of the two was giving better than he was getting, the bigger one covered in his own blood and panting. Deciding that the fightt had gone on long enough he took two steps out of the crowd and cupped his hands to his mouth.

“What’s going on here?!” He yelled, the crowd turning silent in an instant. Both of the battling goblins stopped and walked over to the human, both of them bruised and bloody.

One of them growled and pointed at the other. “This one stole from my clan!”

The other snorted and butted heads with the other. “Say that again and you’re skulls my new drinking cup.”

“I’m going to-“

“ENOUGH!” The human roared, making all around him shrink back. Grabbing both of them and lifting them up into the air.
“You want blood? Fine, get the troops together; we’re going on a raid.” The goblins roared in approval, the two chieftains along with them. The human smiled, he should be thanking that pack leader for saying no to his proposal.

And was exactly what he was going to do….

Welcome to Ponyville!

20 minutes before the girls reached ponyville….

Twilight and the others had taken much longer to get to ponyville than the humans because flying by chariot was not really the fastest way to travel; especially compared to a swan dive. During the flight the girls talked excitingly about what they were going to do now that they were finally going home.

Applejack talked about repairs that she was going to start on the farm, Fluttershy spoke about some animals that she needed to see, Rainbow was looking forward to making up new tricks, Pinkie was talking about the party that she was going to throw for the humans, and Rarity spoke about designing them some new cloths.

The only ones that did not partake in the discussion were Chrysalis and Twilight, both of whom were staring off into the distance, both of them glum. Why were they glum you might ask? Well it was because of the humans. Twilight was glum because she didn’t get any of her questions answered by them and when she tried to get close to her Quicksilver it would just move away, leaving her far more frustrated than she had ever been in her life.

Chrysalis’s reason for glumness was a bit more justified than Twilight’s. She used to be a powerful queen of thousands of subjects, she lived in luxury and elegance, she was respected and feared by many, and now she was the babysitter of a crazy human for goddess knows how long. So both the unicorn and the changeling felt sorry for themselves until they heard Applejack’s yell in anger and confusion.

“What an’ the hay happen?”

The other girls broke off their conversations with each other and looked at where the angry farmer was pointing. All of them now noticed that they were flying over Sweet Apple Acres, it’s fields covered with apples. Everything about the sight could have been called picturesque expect a sizeable crater that was close to the farms entrance.

What happened? Twilight thought as they made their way into town, they chariot leaving them at the edge of town. After thanking the guards the girls walked into town to see if they could find out what happened to the farm; Chrysalis changing into a random pony so as not to panic the townsfolk. What they saw in the middle town was both confusing and mildly hilarious.

There was a large group of ponies gathered around Vinyl and Octavia’s house, which was swaying dangerously, looking like it was about to collapse. Outside the house was everything from furniture to DJ equipment. After finding out what had happened they waited for Forge to make his escape.

“Reaper is everypony outta the way?” He called from inside the house.

“Yep!” Reaper yelled.

The girls watched as the top of the house was shifted up, the house making one last groan as it plummeted down with a crash, Forge running outside as fast as his legs could take him. The girls each let out a sigh of relief that he was okay. We should see if he’s okay Twilight thought was she looked him over with concern Reaper said- Twilight suddenly noticed that her friends were sniffing the air along with the group that had watched everything unfold. “What are you girls-“Twilight began as she saw their eyes glaze over and they looked hungrily at Forge, who was chalk white with fear. He looked at her and she looked at him; fear written all over his face.

“Twilight!” he yelled “SAVE ME!”

The mob of ponies were now making their way to the injured human. Twilight facehoofed, hard; something like this was already happening? Charging her horn she enveloped the whole group in her magic, preventing Forge’s pheromones from affecting them. The large group of ponies stopped in their tracks, each of them blushing from embarrassment for what they were about to do. Forge let out a sigh of relief and grinned at Twilight.

“Thanks niece” he said, getting up and limping toward her “You really save-“He was cut off by a sea-green blur slamming into him. Forge groaned it really isn’t my day today he sadly thought to himself as he looked up at his attacker.

His vision was assaulted by 2 golden orbs, both of which were looking over him eagerly. Since he was still pretty tired and the pony really wasn’t doing anything to him yet, Forge just let her be as he caught his breath. Closing his eyes he thought of how he was going to kick his brother’s asses for making him do a swan dive.

“Are you a human?!” A bubbly voice asked him; the green unicorn if Forge was to guess. Without opening his eyes he answered.

“Yes little green unicorn.” He tiredly told her. “Now could you pleas-"something cold was clamped around each of his wrist. His eyes shot open, he could feel his strength draining so that meany that she got lead on him. With a yelp he was lifted off the ground by his cloths by the unicorn, who was looking around crazily at the group of very confused ponies.

“ALLLL of you said I was crazy!” Lyra yelled, getting on her back legs and pointing at all the ponies present with a hoof “Now who’s crazy huh huh?” she laughed manically as she ran to her house, a yelling human in tow…

Each of the girls looked confusingly as Forge was lost in Lyra and Bon Bon’s house. Reaper and Longstrider looked at each other and Reaper handed Longstrider some bits. “I told ya that old Forgey would get kidnapped in the first week.” A smug Longstrider told his brother who snorted and crossed his arms. Vinyl looked at both of them, a small smile on her face.

“I guess that happens a lot?” She asked them. Reaper grinned at her.

“This isn’t the hundredth time this happened.” He told her.

Even after all that happened that day Vinyl kept her usual good humor and laid back attitude. Even though she knew there was going to be hell to pay because of the house she could appreciate when something was funny.

And that was bucking funny

Laughing, she put on her trademark sunglasses and looked up at the 2 monsters that were beginning to grow on her; even they had only known each other for about 30 minutes. “That” She said, wiping a tear from her eye “is bucking hilarious.” She, the humans, even Octavia, who was not in the best of moods right now, laughed until their sides hurt.

“Vinyl Scratch, Octavia! What happened to my house?” An angry voice yelled. Both of the mares flinched, it was their landlord, Filthy Rich. Vinyl looked at her housemate sadly.

“Buck us” They both said as their landlord trotted angrily over to them….

In his pretty long life Forge has been kidnapped many, many times. He had been kidnapped for information, for someone trying to collect the very large bounty that was on his head, and for other…reasons. (The Crystal Queen had taken Forge to try to rape him so many times that he had known the names of most of her personal guard) So when Lyra had taken him to her house he really wasn’t that mad, just indifferent to the whole situation really. He was sure, like every time he was kidnapped, he would get out of his confines and make good his escape. Besides, it was nice to be off his ankle for a little bit.

The whole way the unicorn’s house (or that’s at least what he thought the building was) she excitingly told him about her dreams about humans and how the other ponies thought she was crazy, et cetera et cetera, Forge kinda tuned her out toward the end as he looked over the shackles that she put him in.

They weren’t made completely of lead or Forge would already be free, lead made him about as strong as he would be as a normal human but even then he was very strong. No the smart little unicorn had lead coated around the inside of steel shackles, and it was easy to see that ponies hadn’t made these.

He chuckled at the thought of pony blacksmiths, they made the worst steel in the whole world. Hell, his master didn’t think that there was such a thing as a pony blacksmith. His thoughts turned toward his old smithing master; he wondered if the old dragon was still alive…

“We’re here~!” The little unicorn sing-songed as she opened the door, floating him inside and onto a nice shaggy couch, which he immensely enjoyed.

“Colgate, Bon Bon, look what I got!” She yelled. Forge saw a little blue unicorn poke her head from up the stairs.

“What do ya got Lyra?” Lyra bounced happily in place as she pointed to Forge, who was trying to relax on the couch.

“A human!” She told her roommate, who was trotting downstairs toward her.

Colgate walked up to the human, her mouth a-gap on a slightly awed expression. She looked him up and down and poked him a couple of times to see if he was real. Forge looked at the little blue unicorn.

“Could you please stop that?” Colgate jumped back in surprise.

“It talks?” She asked Lyra. Forge decided to answer.

“He talks yes.” Both unicorns looked at each other and at him and at each other again. Then here was silence, awkward, awkward silence, with just the unicorns and Forge looking at each other. This dragged on for a good 5 minutes when Lyra and Colgate suddenly both hopped up into the air and started to dance around the very confused human.

“It’s a human, a human, I found a human!” Lyra started to sing, still bouncing around him.

Colgate joined her friend and they started to sing their little song until Forge sighed and told them, “Yes, yes you found a human, now could you please get the human a glass of water? He’s fucking thirsty. O and could you open that blind for me? I need the sun on me for a little bit.”

Both of his captors stopped mid-bounce and looked at each other, smiling sheepishly.

“Sure Mr. Human!” They both said, running to do as he asked, Lyra getting him some water and Colgate opening the blinds up, the sun’s rays now shining on the Quicksilver wrapped on his arm, slowly charging it. Just gotta wait for Quicksilver to charge for a few minutes Forge thought as Lyra hoofed him a glass of water, marveling as his fingers wrapped around the glass.

After taking a big gulp of the water Forge looked over the unicorns. “Now Ms….?

“Lyra, Lyra Heartstrings, that’s Colgate, my roommate, my other roommate Bon Bon must not be here.” Lyra said as Colgate waved at the human, making him smile.

“Now Ms. Lyra, what can I do for you?” He asked her. “You must of kidnapped me a reason.” Lyra nodded happily.

“I’m going to study you!” He blinked at her.

“Study me?” He asked her. She nodded again, bouncing up and down in front of him.

“Yep! You’re going to tell me all about yourself!” Forge sighed and took another drink of his water. Eh, what the hell? Why not?

“Okay, I’ll answer a couple of questions.” Lyra squealed in delight and pulled out a quill and paper.

“Okay, first off what’s your name?”

“Forge.”

“That’s a silly name!” Colgate said, Lyra trying to shush her but the blue unicorn wouldn’t be silenced. Putting her forehooves on the humans lap and getting real close to him she said,” Are all humans big like you Mr. Forge?”

Forge chuckled. “No, I’m really big for a human.”

“That’s neat! You seem like a nice human!”

“Colgate….” Lyra said.

“Thank you, you seem…. Like a nice, slightly crazy unicorn.”

“Thank you! Do you want to be friends? It seems like you’d be a good friend!”

“Colgate….”

“I’d make a good friend, or at least I thin-“

“COLGATE!” Lyra yelled, scaring her friend so much that she hopped in the humans lap in fright. Forge chuckled as Lyra cleared her throat.

“Okay, now where was I?” She looked hungrily at his hands. “How is it having…. Hands!” Forge looked at her and closed his eyes, looking proud of himself.

“Awesome.”

“You’re omnivores right?”

“Yep.” Colgate, who was still Forge’s lap, looked at him in interest, her eyes slightly glazing over. Using her hooves to open the human’s mouth she peered inside his mouth.

“Yes!” Colgate shrieked “Look at those beautiful teeth!”

“Whash?” Forge asked Lyra who clarified.

“Colgate is a dentist, as you can see she really loves teeth.”

“Bucking right I do!” Colgate happily said, opening the human’s mouth even more.” Look at those canines, almost long enough to be fangs! They almost don’t look natural for your mouth structure!”

Lyra wasn’t helping matters, playing with his hands. He tried to struggle but both ponies were now stronger than him thanks to the lead still on his wrists. His savor appeared in the form of Bon Bon coming thought the front door with a bag in her mouth. Both of the ponies that were assaulting him stopped in their tracks and watched as Bon Bon, humming a tune to herself, put the bag on the counter in the kitchen and called upstairs, thinking both of her roommates were up there.

“Colgate, Lyra I got puddi-“She turned toward the couch and looked at a pony clung to Forge, who decided to have a little fun with the whole getting-kidnapped-by-ponies-that-were-kinda-crazy thing.

“Help me” Forge said to her “These crazy ponies are holding me against my will and they threatened to cut my hands off.”
It got the reaction that he wanted.

Bon Bon looked at her roommates sternly, like a mother about to yell at her children. “You guys coltnapped somepony?!” She demanded.

“Well-” Lyra tried to say but Bon Bon curtly ignored her and kept talking.

“No Lyra you’ve taken this took far!” Forge decided to help the poor mares.

“The blue one also told me that she was going to take all of my teeth.” If he was honest with himself he might have been pushing this too far but this was turning out to be one of the funniest kidnappings that he had never been apart of.

“WHAT?!” Bon Bon yelled, causing the 2 mares to flinch as Forge had to choke back his laughter.

“I didn’t-“Colgate tried to defend herself but she was also cut off.

“I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU TWO!” Bon Bon roared as she went into a hysterical rant for the next 10 minutes. Finally Lyra got tired of the yelling and stuck her hoof in the mouth of a very angry Bon Bon.

“Bon Bon just let me explain.” She told the angry mare” The human is just being tricky, trying to turn you against us.” Lyra said with a nod, pointing at a smiling Forge.” We need to be strong while we study it.”

“ Him!” Forge said.

“Him” Lyra repeated. “ The first thing we need to study is hi-“

“Wait why do you get to study him?” Colgate asked.

“What do you mean?” Lyra asked her, bring Forge’s hand up to her face “Look at these babies!” Colgate responded as she opened his mouth again.

“But his teeth! I might never get to see an omnivores teeth again!” Both of the mares squared off, muzzle to muzzle.

“He’s mine!”

“No he’s MINE!” The yelling escalated into an adorable brawl, Colgate and Lyra rolling around the ground, Bon Bon trying to stop the hilarious and adorable fight as Forge quietly laughed to himself.

Suddenly his Quicksilver started to float around him again, signifying that it was charged up enough to work again. Time to get the fuck outta here Forge thought…

“STOP IT YOU TWO!” Bon Bon yelled as her roommates rolled around on the ground, biting and mane pulling. She sighed and looked at Forge. To her surprise something was floating around him as he looked at her and smiled, his glowing eyes sparkling with amusement. Popping both of his thumbs out of place he let the shackles slide off his wrist.
Standing up and willing his Quicksilver to go around his ankle so he could walk. He nodded toward Bon Bon as he walked toward where she had put the bag filled with pudding. Grabbing the pudding that Forge thought was Colgate and Lyra’s he took out a plastic spoon from the bag and popped open both of the containers and peered inside.

“Ooo chocolate!” Forge exclaimed as he promptly stole both of the unicorn’s pudding as revenge for kidnapping him. Waving at a frazzled Bon Bon, who as he left facehoofed so hard she almost gave herself a black eye….

This has been a long fucking day Forge thought as he finished his stolen pudding and walked back to where the ponies whose house that he had broken lived. The same group of ponies were still in the pretty much same spot as Forge limped toward them. As he got nearer he heard yelling.

“Whose going to pay for this?! You 2 are good for nothing….” As he got closer he saw that Vinyl and Octavia were being screamed at by a stallion. Forge was tried, he was hurt, and he was getting slowly pissed at the stallion.….

When Forge was kidnapped Longstrider, being the next in rank, had to explain everything to the ponies so they wouldn’t attack them.... Or run away screaming, Longstrider didn't know what ponies did now-a-days to strange creatures. After a good talk with the mayor the ponies learned that the humans didn’t mean any harm.

Hopefully Forge wouldn’t make him a liar.

His said brother was limping toward the stallion that was yelling at Vinyl and Octavia angrily. “O shit.” Longstrider muttered as Filthy raised a hoof, looking like he was about to strike one of the girls. He turned toward Twilight, who was standing right next to him. “Niece” he said, Twilight looking at him with a puzzled expression “you’re in for a treat.”….

Just as Filthy’s hoof was being brought down something grabbed it. Confused, he looked toward the grabber. “You must be the landlord of the house I broke.” Forge said to Filthy Rich who looked up at him.

“You must be Captain Forger.” He told the human, who grimaced; this stallion had friends in high places; well-connected high places.

“Yes Mr…..”

“Filthy, Filthy Rich.”

“Well Mr. Rich, if you know my name then I’m guessing you know of the new facility that is right out of town?”

“Yes I may know something of it.”

“Then come by in a couple of days so I can talk about reimbursing you for the house.” Filthy nodded toward the human.

“Very well Captain.” He said as he started he walk away.

“O Mr. Rich?” Forge called.

“Ye-“as he turned around he was hoisted up in the air with a yelp to face a very angry Forge. Something wrapped around his neck as Forge snarled. Taking 2 steps he launched a screaming Filthy straight up into the air. All of the ponies watched as he disappeared in the sky.

Vinyl and Octavia looked at Forge, who was breathing heavily.

“Forge” Vinyl said,” I could kiss you right now.” Forge snorted, too tired to find one fuck to give, pulling out a cigar and a match.

“You’ll end up like that asshole then.” He said, lighting the cigar and taking a few puffs.

“How high is he going to go?” Rainbow asked as she squinted up at the sky. Forge shrugged.

“The Quicksilver will take him about a mile or 2 up and it’ll drop his ass.” Octavia looked up at Forge.

“Captain, thank you for your ‘assistance’” She said “But I don’t think you know what you’ve gotten yourself into.” Forge just snorted, still not finding a fuck to give. He turned toward the large group of ponies still around them.

“Citizens of ponyville” Forge yelled “I am Captain Forger of the Equestrian special forces, the human that most of you tried to rape.” The ponies blushed as Forge continued. “You all will help us carry Ms. Scratch and Octavia’s things to the facility outside of town or I’ll draft every one of you into the Equestrian military! You have 30 seconds to start grabbing things.” The ponies looked at each other and back at Forge to see if he was serious.

“15 seconds!”

As the ponies rushed to grab whatever they could, Longstrider walked up to his brother, laughing. “Way to meet the townsfolk! Where did you get the cigar?”

“Stole them from Blueballs, the stallion might be an asshole but he sure knows his cigars.” He turned toward Reaper. “Reaper, show the ponies where to take the ladies things.” Reaper nodded as the 6 girls and queen in disguise walked up toward Forge, Rainbow still looking for Filthy in the sky. The stallion finally was seen screaming his head off as he quickly approached the ground.

At about a 100 feet from the ground the Quicksilver slowed him down until he was stopped 3 feet from the ground and dropped in a muttering mess. The Quicksilver flew back toward his ankle as the group walked toward Forge’s new home.

“Captain” Octavia said.

“Just Forge ma’am”

“…Forge, why are all of our things going to your home?”

“Because ma’am I broke your house and I’m guessing you 2 need a place to stay. So my home is now yours. Just one thing though…”

“What’s that Forgey?” Vinyl said; Forge flinched at his hated nickname.

“How do you feel about living with a changeling and an omnivore?”

Both of the ponies shrugged, signifying their indifference. “We’re fine with it.” Vinyl said as Forge looked at the ponies that were carrying stuff away. A light bulb went off in Forge’s mind; this was as good a place as any for his niece to execute her promise.

“All of you get back here for a second.” Forge called to the ponies, all of them trotting back as Forge motioned over to Twilight to come over to him.

Before she could ask what he needed Forge said,” Alright niece, you lost the bet and it’s time to pay the piper.”

Twilight looked up at Forge, beat red and with a shocked look on her face. “What?!” She looked at the crowd of ponies, all of them looking curiously. “I’m not doing that in front of all of these ponies!”

Forge raised an eyebrow. “Yes you are.”

“No I’m not!”

“Yep.”

“NO!”

“Time’s a wastin’ niece.”

Sighing and blushing heavily Twilight turned to the crowd of ponies. “Hello citizens of ponyville” She called out “I am Twilight Sparkle-”She turned around, showing the crowd her flank. Smacking said flank she yelled. “-THE ELEMENT OF SEXINESS!” The whole town looked on a blushing Twilight, who just wanted to run to her library and stay there for the next couple of years from embarrassment, all of them wide mouthed from shock.

Forge looked down at his niece, patting her on the head. “Good job niece.” He said as him and the other humans hit the ground, tears streaming down her faces…..

Author's Note

New chapter for bunny day.

That's Rough Buddy

“Chrissy wake up…”Chrysalis groaned at the voice and rolled over in her big, warm, comfortable bed, ignoring the voice that had just woke her up from a very good dream. (She had taken over Canterlot.)

“Chrissy you have 5 seconds or I’m getting you up…”She ignored the voice and snuggled in her bed more, not noticing the foot that was on the base of her bed.

“5…. 4….. 3….. 2… 1.…Last chance…No? Okay…”The ex-changeling queen was roughly brought out of la-la land when her bed was flipped over, Chrissy falling with a yelp.

“What, where, who?” Chrissy said looking around the room for the thing that savagely brought her out of her sleepy-time.

The demon, nay, the evil incarnate that woke her up was a grinning Forge who stood over her, arms crossed. “Time for work Chrissy, we got a long day today!” Forge practically yelled, making her wince.

Rubbing her eyes with a hoof Chrissy asked,” What time is it?”

“5 a.m.” Chrissy sputtered.

“5 in the bucking morning?!” She yelled while Forge laughed.

“Yep, I let ya sleep in today. Now come on it’s time for the most important meal of the day!” With that Forge, almost skipping, left a tired, angry, and confused Chrissy to get ready for whatever the crazy human had in plan for her today.

After her hair being combed and her teeth being brushed Chrissy slugged out of her cabin, room thingy and walked toward the mess hall. If you had to describe Forge’s compound in one work would be massive, Chrissy had a really hard time believing that Celestia had had this built in only 4 days.

The compound was almost as big as all of the Apple’s land but instead of apple trees there were enough facilities to house hundreds of guardsponies, but oddly not enough to house Forge’s brothers, who Forge told to find somewhere else to live. As she walked she noticed that the whole place was basically open space, there was just pretty much a giant pavilion with some cabins that acted as officer’s quarters with a lot of those crappy spring beds that they have at campsites.

Walking through the mess hall doors she saw Forge nursing a cup of coffee with empty bowl and a box of cereal on the table next to him in the kitchen. He looked up and smiled at her.

“Want some coffee Chrissy? Come on, get some cereal, we’re burning day light.” She snorted and sat beside him, getting herself some coffee and a bowl of Celest-O’s. When she took a sip of her coffee she spat it right back out.

“This is awful!” Forge snorted and took another sip of his coffee, swishing it around his mouth before swallowing.

“Taste fine to me.”

“It’s like tar! Where’s the cream and sugar anyway?” Forge looked at her disapprovingly.

“Real men drink their coffee straight.”

“I’m not a man!” Forge shrugged and pointed out a fridge that had some milk and told her that he didn’t find any sugar in his short search of their massive kitchen. Chrysalis sighed as she drank her now okay, but still pretty awful coffee. I get waken up an ungodly hour and There’s no sugar for my coffee. She thought as she took another sip this day can’t get worse can it?....

“Get those hooves up Chrissy! Those oranges aren’t going to squash themselves!” Chrysalis sighed, exhausted, bringing a hoof down to crush another pile of oranges into pulp and watching as the juices collected in a barrel, imaging that each of the oranges was Forges big, fat, stupid head. She had been doing this for hours now as Forge heated up one of the forge’s.

“Why do you need orange juice anyway?” Chrissy moaned. Forge looked up from his forge and walked over to her, ignoring her question. He peeked in barrel and nodded in approval.

“Alright you can stop.” He told her, Chrissy sighing happily as she stepped out of the tub full of smashed oranges. Forge picked up the barrel of freshly squeezed (or in this case smashed) OJ over to the forge that he had been heating up. Without looking at her Forge asked, “Chrissy, do you know the most important thing that a blacksmith makes? The thing that gets him the most of his money?” He floated a hammer and tongs over to the anvil that he was standing by.

Chrissy thought a moment then shrugged. “I have no idea.” Forge looked at her, his eyes closed and his head raised high.

“It’s nails Chrissy.” She looked at him, confused.

“Nails?”

“Nails.” Forge repeated, bringing out a white hot chunk of iron from the forge and began banging on it.

“What’s the orange juice for then?!” Chrissy yelled over Forge’s banging.

“To cool the metal.” She looked at him like he was nuts, Chrissy might not be a blacksmith but she was pretty sure that that wasn’t what you used to cool the metal.

“Why don’t you use water?!” Forge stopped in mid-swing and looked at her.

“Look Chrissy” He said, patting her on the head “just believe the person that’s been a blacksmith for 30 years that orange juice is much better than water for cooling nails.” She snorted.

“What do you use for swords? Grape juice?”

“Apple juice actually; grape juice is for armor.” Chrissy’s eye twitched and she facehoofed.

“Okay…. What else am I doing today?” To her surprise Forge already had the ore pounded out into a long, thinish wire.

“You’ll pump the bellows and get me coal for the forge, remember don’t use magic to lift the coal, it affects it and I want normal coal for nails.” Chrysalis sighed and looked at the clock that was on one of the beams that held the roof up. 10 o’clock she thought sourly she started to push down on the bellows, wondering if she could go back to her nice little cell in Canterlot…

Chrissy slumped in a chair in the mess hall, covered in coal dust and sweat. Forge had given her an hour lunch break and she was trying very hard not to fall asleep as she made herself a sandwich. She heard the door open and she saw her other housemates, Vinyl and Octavia.

Chrissy really didn’t think that they would of wanted to stay with them after Forge had not-so-gently told them that she was a changeling and he ate meat but they really didn’t care, both had played in the griffon kingdoms so they were okay with meat eaters and for some reason they could care less about her being a changeling.

“How’s it going Chrissy?” A chipper Vinyl asked as she looked through the pantry for some grub. Chrysalis groaned and laid her head on the table. Vinyl grinned. “Rough day on the job eh?”

“You’re a mess dear.” Octavia said as she made a daisy sandwich and sat next to her. “Why do you smell like oranges?” Chrissy sighed.

“He had me made make orange juice for nails.” She told them. Octavia frowned and Vinyl snorted back her laughter.

“Nails?”

“We’ve been making them all day; he’s made 4 barrels full of them.” Vinyl sat down and flicked her shades up, showing her eyes.

“It can’t be that bad can it? Where’s the big guy anyway?” Vinyl asked her as Chrissy finished her sandwich.

“Still at the forge, he said he wasn’t hungry.” Octavia looked over to Vinyl.

“We should go and thank Mr. Forger for letting us stay here.” Vinyl snorted.

“Why? He’s the one that broke our house.”

“Vinyl…”

“*sigh* fine, Chrissy ya wanna show us where the smithy thingy is?” Chrissy sighed and got up.

“Come on, my break is about over anyways.” The other two mares got up and followed her as she led them through the outdoor work area, a plot of bare land that Forge said was going to be a garden, and finally, the blacksmith’s workshop. They followed the sound of a hammer hitting an anvil, where they found Forge filling up another barrel with nails.

When he saw them he smiled and put his hammer down and wiped the sweat off his brow. “Ms. Octavia, Ms. Scratch, how were you’re rooms? Did you both sleep well?” Vinyl looked at him and whistled, strutting up to him.

“Forgey look at you, you big colt, working up quite a sweat. All of that sweat~” Forge took a step back and raised his hammer defensively.

“Stop calling me Forgey, I hate that fucking nickname.”

“Awwwww come on~ I think it’s cuuuuutie.”

“I will beat you with this hammer.” He warned her.

“You can beat me with something el-“

“Vinyl, for Celestia’s sake stop teasing him.” Octavia said, looking sternly at her friend, who burst into a fit of giggles. Octavia turned to Forge and straightened her bow tie.

“We just stopped by to thank you for letting us stay with you Mr. Forger.” Forge visibly relaxed, putting his hammer down and wiping the grime off his hands with a rag.

“It’s nothing Ms. Octavia, I did break your house after all, it’s the least I can do.” Vinyl threw her hooves up in the air.

“Told you Tavi!” Octavia facehoofed.

“Vinyl… just shut up. Anyway Mr. Forge, thank you for everything, we both-“She glared at Vinyl “- appreciate it.”

Forge smiled and looked at Chrissy. “Alright back to work Chrissy! We got 6 more hours until dinner and you’re done!” Chrissy groaned and the others giggled and left as Chrissy got back to work...

6 Hours later….

“Good work Chrissy!” Forge cheerfully told the achy, tired, coal covered changeling. Forge was also covered in the soot from head to toe, except the pure white beanie that he said would protect his hair from catching on fire, why the beanie was still white was a mystery to her. She glared at him as they walked toward their cabins.

“Buck… you.” She growled as he chuckled at her.

“Just get a shower and get to the mess hall. You’ll need your strength for tomorrow, we’re making axe heads!” Chrissy groaned again and slammed her door in a laughing Forges face…

That was Chrysalis’s next 2 days. She would be woken up by the asshole human (who she was pretty sure didn’t sleep) before the sun came up, she would eat breakfast, and she would do something ridiculous as a prep for whatever they were going to make that day, and she would pass out and wait in dread for the next day.

This routine was interrupted by the arrival of either one or more of the 6 elements of harmony or one of the humans, who Chrissy saw both of them go into the Everfree forest, for what Forge wouldn’t tell her.

“So how’s it going Chrissy?” Longstrider asked as the 2 of them watched Forge hammer away everything from shovel heads to hinges. She was delighted to know that as time went on Forge asked her to do less and less things, even though she was only 2 days in she almost had nothing to do, Forge mostly using his magic to get anything he needed.

Chrysalis sighed, “The first day was awful, the second day was better, today I really haven’t done anything, thank the gods. I swear that human hasn’t slept in 2 days.” Longstrider chuckled.

“Ya he really doesn’t get that much sleep unless you make him, and don’t worry he’ll keep your flank busy.” Chrysalis sighed while Longstrider patted her on the back.

“I know; it’s rough buddy. Don’t worry though, there’s a really good chance he wouldn’t kill you like the last few assistances.” She looked up at him.

“You really know how to make a girl feel better.” She sarcastically said. “By the way, where are you and Reaper living?” She couldn’t care less but she wanted to continue their conversation for some odd reason.(It was because the author thought it would be amusing.)

“Reaper’s living with Pinkie and I’m renting a room from Bon Bon. I’d get my own place but houses in ponyville are hella-expensive.” Chrissy chuckled.

“Don’t you mean Forge’s town? He did take ponyville sign out and put his own in.” Chrissy chuckled at the memory.

“Chrissy, come here!” Forge called. Chrissy sighed and trotted over to him.

“Yes master?” She sarcastically said to him. He didn’t look up as he answered.

“Chrissy, we got enough items to open up the shop in a couple of days and you’re going to run the store.” She looked at him like he was nuts.

“What?!” She yelled.

“I need somepony to run the cash register while I’m working, and let’s face it; you’re not cut out for being my assistant.” She nodded, if she had to do what she did on her first day everyday she was pretty sure that she would die.

“Good now let-”Suddenly a curly pink head shot out from behind Forge, making Chrissy stumble back in fright; Forge was not impressed, not even flinching.

“Hi Pinkie, what do you need today? Is Reaper causing trouble?” Pinkie giggled, bouncing in front of Forge.

“No silly, he’s making cupcakes right now! I’m just here to give you both these!” She handed them both invitations to a ‘Yay humans now live in our town so let’s have a party’ party. Forge chuckled.

“Alright, you have a nice day Pinkie.” She smiled up at him.

“Okie Dokie Lokie! Bye Forgey, bye Chrissy!” The hyperactive party pony said, hopping back into town, Chrissy watching the crazy pink pony hop off in the distance and looked back at Forge.

“Why didn’t she scare you?” Forge chuckled, picking up his hammer again and continued to pound out a shovel head.

“I have a brother makes no sound whatsoever; you get use to someone popping up around you after a while. And the report I got on her says stuff like that happens all the time. Now I’m opening the store in a few days, here” He said handing her a piece of paper “these are the prices for everything, just try to remember them okay?” She nodded as she started to walk away before remembering what she was suppose to tell him.

“O by the way, Filthy is coming over in an hour with what I’m pretty sure is going to be a lawyer.” Forge snorted.

“Don’t worry, I got a plan.”

“Really?” Forge grinned.

“Do I look like a guy with a plan?” She snorted as trotted away from the, in her opinion, very crazy human….

“My client is suing you for the destruction of his property and attacking him without cause.” A lawyer pony told Forge, a smug Filthy sitting next to the lawyer pony who’s name Forge, for the life of him, couldn’t remember, it was probably something about lawyering. Forge raised an eyebrow, trying to stay focused on what the stallion was saying, but his lack of sleep was affecting him, it didn’t help that the lawyer pony had a monotone voice.

“Okay….” The stallion continued as Forge suppressed the urge to yawn.

“He’s willing to-“Forge interrupted him.

“Filthy” he said. “Why don’t you just talk to me for god’s sake?” Filthy snorted as the lawyer continued.

“-settle the matter out of court.” He said.

“Okay what do you want Filthy?”

“He wants-“

“Filthy’s a big boy Mr. lawyer, he can answer his own questions.” The stallion sighed.

“Mr. Metalworker, could you please stop treating this like a game? These charges are serious!” Forge was getting worried; the guy that delivered his fucks still hadn’t showed up, he was getting worried for the guy.

“Okay what does he want?” Forge said with a roll of his eyes.

“Oooo not much, just a million bits.” If Forge was drinking something both of the stallions would of got a good soaking.

“What?”

“If you can’t come up with the money then this compound will do nicely.” Forge snorted.

“This is a military compound, the government owns it.” The lawyer shrugged.

“You are royalty; a million bits shouldn’t be that hard to come by.” Forge seriously thought of dropping that bill in Tia’s lap, he couldn’t help but grin at the thought. He shook his head; he already had a sweet plan and he was sticking to it.

“Filthy” Forge said, looking at the stallion. “Your families lived in ponyville for a long time right?” Filthy nodded proudly.

“Why yes, my families been here since the town was founded.” Forge grinned, he had him. Pulling out his land deed handed it to the lawyer, who raised an eyebrow and looked over the paper.

“The reason for showing me is what Mr. Metalworker?” Forge smiled evilly at Filthy.

“That piece of paper says that I’m the owner of all of ponyville, making me your landlord Filthy.” Filthy Rich paled as he continued. “You’re family built on my property without my permission.”

“But this document is over 2000 years old!” Filthy complained. Forge shrugged.

“Doesn’t make a difference; tell you what, I’ll let you keep your land if you pay me… oooo I don’t know, a million bits sounds about right.” Filthy looked at his lawyer, who was sweating bullets; the human had Filthy by the balls and everyone sitting at the table knew it. Forge leaned over to Filthy.

“I’ll tell you what big guy, you send the bill for the broken house to Celestia and she’ll pay it; you just drop the rest of the charges and everyone’s happy, how does that sound?” Filthy sighed; he really didn’t have much of a choice.

“…Fine.” Forge got up and grinned.

“Great, I’ll show you gents out.”…..

Chrysalis was about to open the door to the mess hall when the door open; revealing a depressed Filthy Rich, a pissed off lawyer pony, and a smug looking Forge. Before they saw her she transformed into an earth pony. Forge looked at her and grinned.

“Hey Chrissy, I was just showing these boys out.” Turning around he sat down, Chrissy walking in and sitting next to him.

“You look smug” She told him “So I’m guessing that it went well?” Forge nodded, smiling.

“Yep, come on let’s make some dinner. By the way I need you to get some apples for tomorrow; I’m making swords.” She nodded, walking into the kitchen with him, changing back into her changeling form as Forge looked in the fridge and frowned, Tia hadn’t stocked his pantry with meat. I need to get Longstrider to go hunting he thought as the door to mess hall slammed open.

Before Forge could even blink, he was tackled by a white blur. “What did Filthy do to you?! Take all your money? Make you cry? Touch you in your no-no area?” Forge looked up at Vinyl and resisted the urge to facepalm. He carefully lifted her off him and started to make pasta.

“I’m fine; Filthy and I made an agreement.” She looked up at him.

“So no touching of your no-no area?”

“ No touching of my no-no area.” Forge told her, rolling his eyes. “Now sit down while I make something for us to eat.”

“Ya know Forgey~“

“What?”

“I could touch you in you’re-“She couldn’t finish her sentence because Forge used his magic to toss her through the mess hall door….

“We should thank him.”

“Why Tavi?”

“Because Vinyl, he made Filthy look like a foal.” Vinyl shrugged.

“So what?” Octavia gasped.

“You know how long I’ve wanted that dastardly stallion to get a taste of his own medicine!” Tavi said, stomping her hoof for emphasis. Vinyl rolled her eyes and started to walk toward Forge’s room. Octavia raised an eyebrow.

“Why are we going to his room? Wouldn’t Mr. Forger be at his smithy right now?” Vinyl continued walking, not turning around to answer her.

“The big guy hasn’t slept in like 4 days Tavi; we gotta wake him up to thank him.” Octavia frowned; if the poor man hadn’t slept for days then she could wait to thank him, maybe get him a thank you cake or something. As she thought about what he would like she didn’t notice Vinyl opening Forges door and walking in.

“Vinyl” Octavia hissed when she realized that they were in his room “let’s let the stallion sleep!” Vinyl snickered, looking for where his bedroom was.

“Hush up Tavi” Vinyl said, finding Forge’s bedroom and walking in it, Octavia quietly yelling at her to get out of his room. Vinyl trotted over to Forges bed and frowned; it was empty. What the hay? Vinyl thought as she ignored Tavi I saw Chrissy drag- before she could finish that thought, Vinyl felt something grab her by her hooves. Before she could so much as yelp she was dragged under the bed as something wrapped its arms around her.

“…Teddy...” It mumbled. Vinyl opened her eyes and looked at what was holding her. It looked awfully like Forges hands. Now that she thought about it, the thing that said teddy sounded a lot like Forge. Using her incredible detective skills, she came to the conclusion that for some reason Forge was sleeping under his bed and for some reason thought that she was a teddy bear. Vinyl was brought out of her musings by a very worried looking Octavia poking her head under the bed.

“Vinyl?” She said.

“Ya Tavi?” Octavia let out a sigh of relief.

“You’re okay?” Vinyl suppressed a giggle.

“I’m fine Tavi; I’ll get outta here in a sec.” With that she tried to wiggle out of a sleeping Forge’s grasp.

What happened was one of the scariest things either mare had ever experienced.

Bringing her closer to him he growled, Vinyl feeling the vibrations in his chest. While neither of the girls had ever heard a dragon growl before, they were sure that Forge was doing a very good impression of one, a bit of fire coming out of his mouth as he bared his teeth.

Forge calmed down after Vinyl froze, putting his chin on top of her head.“…Teddy…. No…” He firmly said, once again descending into his quiet breathing.

Vinyl and Octavia looked at each other. “Go get Chrissy!” Vinyl quietly hissed as Forge rubbed his chin on the top of her head to try to find a more comfortable position…

As Vinyl and Octavia waited for Chrissy to find something in that book that Celestia gave her, Vinyl noticed how comfortable she was right now. Somehow, the floor was more comfortable than any mattress she had ever slept on, it was warm, but not uncomfortably so; and then there was Forge. She was against his back with his arms wrapped around her so that she could faintly detect the beating of his heart. He was oddly warm, much warmer than a pony, and he was shirtless, so she got to feel his furless body was he held her. He was like a big, warm, terrifying blanket.

Vinyl was trying very hard not to fall asleep when she heard Chrysalis’s shout of victory from above the bed.

“I found it; Forge’s sleeping patterns. Let’s see….” Octavia watched as Chrysalis silently read. With a brisk nod she slammed the book, making Tavi flinch.

“Could you be a little more quiet? We don’t want to wake him!” She whispered. Chrysalis shrugged.

“The book says that we could let off a cannon and it wouldn’t wake him.” She looked under bed at Vinyl. “Vinyl, you’re staying here for a while; apparently if Forge doesn’t sleep for more than 3 days this happens to anypony that comes near his bed.” Vinyl blinked, then facehoofed.

“Duh, I’m a unicorn, I can just teleport away!” But before she could use the spell Chrysalis hissed.

“In the name of sweet Celestia, don’t do that! He’ll use his magic to destroy the whole room when he feels you’re gone!” Vinyl sighed.

“So when am I going to be released from teddy bear duty?”

“The book says that you’ll wake up in your bed in a couple of hours.” Vinyl blinked again.

“…Okay… How? Does he carry me or what?” Chrissy shrugged.

“Nopony knows. You just gotta stick it out until he stops cuddling you.” Vinyl snorted.

“This guy is a wealthy prince whose sweat drives the ladies crazy; horseapples, he’s even a great cuddlier!”

“Teddy….” Forge agreed.

“What’s wrong with him? He could get all the mares he wanted… Well since I’m here…” She reached a hoof back between his legs, feeling around. She whistled. “Um Chrissy… Humans only have 2 legs right?”

“Ya, why?”

“Because big boy down here is packing heat.” Chrissy giggled and Octavia turned crimson.

“Vinyl, did you just feel him up?!”

“Yeppers.” Vinyl said without missing a beat, taking off her shades and sliding them to Octavia

“And why in Celestia’s name did you do that for?!” Vinyl snuggled closer to the human and closed her eyes.

“Curiosity… now you girls better leave so I can get some shut eye……”

Back at Canterlot…

And….. Done! Celestia thought as she put her quill down and inspected her letter. She had been meaning to send this letter anyway, Spike needed to be taught the dragon ways. Forge could help him a little, living with dragons for years, but Spike needed a real dragon to teach him, and Celestia knew the perfect dragon for the job. She heard hoof steps and a knock on her door.

“Come in!” Celestia called. The door swung open, revealing a tired Luna. “What are you doing up so early Luna?” Celestia asked her sister; it was about 4 hours before she needed to be up to raise the moon.

Luna yawned,” We couldn’t sleep.” Luna looked at the floating letter and cocked her head curiously at it. “What is that for dear sister?”

Celestia grinned; Forge knew the particular dragon she was sending this letter to and if he found out he would try to flee the country. If she was honest with herself it was a little mean of her to do this, then she thought of how Forge showed her dildos to the world.

Then she couldn’t find a fuck to give for his feelings.

“Oooo nothing sister” Celestia told her sister as she teleported the letter. “just a letter to an old friend….”

In the Dragonlands…

She sat on her throne of gold, surrounded by her expansive hoard, bored out of her mind. She was a dragon for cryin-

Poof!

“A letter!” The dragoness said, raising an eyebrow. This looked promising…

Snatching the letter out of the air she read it over. It was from Tia, something about teaching a young dragon that had never seen another of its kind. She shrugged, it would be better than sitting on her rump all day eating gems. When she got halfway through the letter she dropped it, her tail twitching. Could it be?....

She grinned, flashing razor sharp, pearly white teeth as she hopped out of her chair, giddy. After all of these years…

She grabbed a bag and started to pack for the long flight. After about an hour of getting herself ready she exited her cave and looked up at the big open sky and smiled. Changing to her full size she took off into the air at a speed that would make Rainbow Dash envious.

“I’m coming Forgey!” She roared, while Forge, back at his home still asleep, shivered…

There goes the Neighborhood

Her wings shot out like dark pillars, enveloping him. Forge tried to run but it was no use, she caught him. Even with all of his great strength he could not best her…

“I got you now Forgey!”

Forge shot up from his bed, smacking his head painfully against its underside. “Fuck me!” He muttered/yelled as he looked around and sighed, it was just a dream; no dragon was trying to rape him.

Rolling out from under his bed Forge looked around his room and smiled; it was Spartan but a good place to sleep. What really caught his eye though was the case that was on his counter. “Tia, you old bitch.” He fondly said as he walked over to the case and opened it and chuckled. In the case was a shiny new violin; with it came a note and a banana that was ready to be eaten.

He sat on his bed and took a big bite of out the banana, opening the letter.

Forge,

I thought you’d like to make a little bit of music.

Love Tia

P.S. Remember, NO golems!

“Why does Tia think I’m going to start making golems?” Forge muttered to himself “I don’t even have my shop opened yet.” Finishing his quick meal he picked up his new instrument and its bow, playing a quick tune. He snorted.

“It sounds like Tia tuned this damn thing.” Correcting it to be playable, Forge walked outside with it and sat down and looked around, sighing, it was another beautiful day in paradise. “Why couldn’t they of waken us up during wartime?” Forge he said, chuckling, bringing the violin to his neck and closing his eyes, thinking of the perfect song to play…

“It was the best sleep I think I’ve even gotten Tavi.”

“That’s nice Vinyl.”

“It was like I was being cuddled by a hot water bottle, and don’t get me started on what was going on with the ground…”

“…I don’t care Vinyl.”

Vinyl scrunched her face at Octavia and nudged her. “Don’t be mad Tavi; wait a couple of days and maybe you could sleep with him too.” Octavia blushed as she looked at Vinyl, mortified at what her friend had suggested.

“Vinyl! I would never do such a thing!” Vinyl grinned.

“Whatever you sa-” Vinyl looked around. “Do you hear that?”

“What are you talking about Vinyl? I swear if this is a- Vinyl? Vinyl?” Tavi looked around, her friend was gone. “Of course.” She muttered, perking her ears, Vinyl had said something about hearing something after all. Then she heard it, a violin. “What in the world?”

Walking toward the music she found Vinyl, her mouth open, looking like she was about to cry. Tavi found the source of the music, it was Forge, and he was playing perhaps one of the saddest songs that she had ever heard, his eyes open and unfocused.

I dreamed a dream in time gone by

When hope was high

And life worth living

I dreamed that love would never die

I dreamed that God would be forgiving

Then I was young and unafraid

And dreams were made and used and wasted

There was no ransom to be paid

No song unsung, no wine untasted

“Must….hug.” Vinyl muttered, trying to walk over to Forge, Octavia stopping her with a hoof stomping down on the DJ’s tail.

“Hush Vinyl! Leave him be.”

“B-but he sounds so sad!” Both of the mares saw something on the edge of their vision; it was Chrysalis, watching the whole thing silently.

“He is sad.” She told them as she watched Forge play the song. “I could sense his sadness from the first time I met him.”

Vinyl’s ears went flat against her skull. “What is he sad about?”

“No idea.”

“I can make him feel better!” Vinyl happily said, trying to get out of Octavia’s grasp. “All he needs is a hug! Or maybe a good bang! Definitely a good bang… ”

“Vinyl!” Octavia chastised, her cheeks red. “For Celestia’s sake-”She stopped, the music had stopped, Forge walking over toward them.

“Morning ladies!” He cheerfully said, using his magic to put the violin back in its case and bringing out a couple of small bags. “How was your sleeps? And before I forget-”Forge threw Chrysalis one of the bags “Here’s your pay Chrissy…. Vinyl, Octavia, why are you looking at me like that?” At this moment Octavia accidently took her hoof off Vinyl’s tail, Vinyl taking advantage of this by tackling Forge to the ground and hugging the ever loving shit out of him.

Looking down at the white pony attached to him chest, Forge said,” …Morning to you too I guess?”

Octavia cleared her throat, “You play very well Mr. Forger.”

Forge chuckled. “Thank you ma’am, I learned to play during the off time between engagements, took 10 years to le-“

“Forgey” Vinyl interrupted. “If you ever need a good bang-”

Forge raised an eyebrow, a confused look on his face. “Bang?”

“Yep, ya know a good rut, the funny business, the sex.” Suddenly there was nothing underneath her, Vinyl catching herself as Forge looked like he was going to run at any moment, appearing about fifteen feet away from the dangerous mares.

“What are you talking about?!”

“You need a good bang!”

“I do not!”

“But it might make you feel better, heck, I bet we could even get Tavi in on the action, get you in a 3-way. How about that Forgey?” Forge and Octavia sputtered, Chrysalis chuckling as she counted her bits.

“Look Vinyl” Forge said as calmly as he could, looking down at her like she was a dangerous animal “As much as I want to continue this discussion I have stuff to do today. Ladies I bid you a good day.” With that Forge almost ran (he actually did run, but fuck it…) toward Sweet Apple acres. The 3 mares looked at each other; Chrysalis facehoofed.

“I should of told him to get milk….”

“What the fuck is wrong with those girls?” Forge muttered as she ran to the Apples house. Since it WAS his job to protect the elements, not blacksmithing, Forge decided to go see how the girls were doing.

Besides it was payday and Reaper bitched when he didn’t have his spending money.

Since she was the closest Applejack was first on the list, Forge getting there in about 5 minutes. Forge sighed, enjoying the scenery as he knocked on the Apples door. He heard somepony trotting to the door and saw a flash of green before it was gone again. Forge shrugged, it must have been a sibling or something. I wonder if I can snatch an apple pi- He thought as he looked around, the door swinging open. A flash of a metal object was all Forge got to see as it connected, Forge getting hit fully on the left side of the face.

In his life Forge had been knocked out 3 times, the first time was when he was battling a dragon. He was smacked by its tail, sending him through a line of trees. The second time was when he fought an alpha diamond dog, getting struck by its huge axe, breaking almost every bone in his body as it hit him in his breastplate. This was the third time, Forge getting hit by a terrified Granny Smith with a frying pan, knocking him off the porch and into an apple tree.

“…Forge, are ya alright?” A voice said as Forge started to come back to relative awareness. The voice got a groan of pain in response. O fuck me, my jaws dislocated! Forge thought as he opened an eye, getting an eyeful of orange and yellow. To his relief it wasn’t another pony trying to knock his head off, it was Applejack and Applebloom. “Can ya hear us?” Applejack asked as she looked Forge over, concern written all over her face.

“Applejack, why’s his jaw hangin’ funny like that?” Applebloom asked her sister as Forge opened his eyes. Before Applejack could explain to her sister about the consequences of scaring granny Smith and why she should never to it Forge popped his jaw back into place, both of the girls flinching at the loud pop.

“Hey girls” Forge said, sitting up and rubbing his jaw as he petted Applebloom “Did you see what hit me?” Applebloom sat in Forges lap, nuzzling him.

“How are ya doing Forge?” Applebloom asked him.

“Fine little one, I’ve been a little busy the past couple of days or I’d of seen you girls sooner. In fact I’m going to town right after I see if your sister’s okay.” Forge looked Applejack over “Applejack are you doing okay, nothing trying to kill you, nothing out of the ordinary right?”

“I’m fine Forge” Applejack said “Ya should be more worried about yerself, granny Smith gave ya a good knock ta the head.” Forge got up and chuckled.

“I’m fine; it’ll take more than that to take me down.” Forge looked around, suddenly worried “She’s not laying around to take another whack at me is she?” Both of the girls chuckled.

“Na, she’s mighty sorry fer hitting ya though.”

“Applejack is that critter still moving? Big Mac, get my big pan!”

Forge shot up, it seemed like now was a perfect time to depart. “Well it’s nice seeing you girls; I still got 5 other ponies to see today.” As he turned leave Applebloom tugged his pants leg, looking over to her sister.

“Applejack can I’ah go with Forge?” Aj looked at her sister sternly.

“Now Applebloom Ya got chores ta do, ya can’t go.”

“Awwww Applejack!”

“No means no Applebloom.”

Forge patted Applebloom on the head. “How about I come back when I check on the other girls…. And Granny Smith’s not trying to kill me?” Applebloom beamed up at him as Applejack herded her back to the house, Forge making his way to town(more like running into town)…

This is going a lot better than I thought it would Forge thought as ponies practically clamored over each other to get away from him at least they’re not starting a riot. It was, if Forge were to guess, about market rush time, but the town square looked almost deserted, ponies running into their houses and slamming their doors. If Forge listened carefully he could hear them boarding up their windows and doors. “They weren’t this shy the other day.” Forge muttered, if Reaper and Longstrider told him right the townsponies were already use to them.

Maybe they’re scared because I’m huge, scary, and made them carry all of my shit Forge thought as he chuckled, walking up to the one cart stand that wasn’t abandoned, a flower stand with a mare that hadn’t noticed him yet looking around bored as she waited for a costumer. “Excuse me ma-“

The mare spun around, looking at him wide-eyed, grabbing a flowerpot and raising it defensively. “You’re not going to eat me monster!” She yelled, Forge taking a step back, he already got his ass knocked once today and he was NOT going to get hit again.

“I’m not going to eat you!” Forge argued as the pony scrunched her face up at him.

“Why, not good enough to be eaten am I?” She demanded as Forge looked the pony up and down and muttered something about crazy ponies, looking over the flower stand.

“Do you sell seeds…Ms…. could you tell me your name?”

“Why, so you know who you’re eating?”

“…..”

“…..”

“…..”

They both stared at each other, Forge narrowing his eyes at her; the pony meeting his gaze with a blank stare.

“Longstrider put you up to this didn’t he?” The mare tried and failed to suppress a smile.

“He may have~” She sing-songed as she trotted over to him and raised a hoof in greeting. “I’m Roseluck! Nice to meet you.”

“Forger, now do you sell seeds or not?” Forge grumpily muttered.

“Awwww come on, there’s no need to be short, it was all just a bit of fun!” Roseluck said, nudging him. “And yes I do. I also sell plants if you’re interested.” Forge brightened hearing that, pulling out Longstrider’s bits and giving her half the bag.

“Here, surprise me; just send whatever to my compound.” He told her, walking away.

“Wait! This is way too much for anything I could give you!” She called after him.

“Good!” He called back as he walked in Sugarcube corner. Forge frowned and looked the building up and down, normally his common sense would tell him not to try to take a bite out of a building but it did look like it was made entirely out of gingerbread, and it may of just been his concession but at the moment it seemed like a great idea to test his thoughts about its edibility. Leaning Forge took a chomp out of the building, expecting the taste of icing and gingerbread. Unfortunately for him it was just wood and nails. “Fuck!” He hollered, clutching his jaw, spitting out the undelightful mouthful of construction materials as he walked in the building, Roseluck laughing at his antics as she of thought which to get him …

“Morning Forgey!” A chipper voice called to him as he opened the door. Flinching at the nickname, Forge saw Pinkie behind the counter and smiled.

“Morning Pinkie! Is Reaper around, I have his pay for the week.” Pinkie nodded but before she could say anything a voice called out.

“Just leave the bag there Forge! I’m busy!”

Forge raised an eyebrow and looked at Pinkie. “You got his black ass to do something? Color me impressed.”

“Fuck you Honkey!” Reaper shouted as Forge walked in the kitchen to see what he was making him so busy.

What he saw made his day.

There was Reaper, wearing pink oven mitts and a frilly pink apron, holding a tray of freshly made cupcakes. Forge and Reaper looked at each other, neither blinking.

“….”

“….”

“…..This is definitely what Martin Luther King had in mind.” Forge told a now pissed off Reaper.

“Honkey, I’m going to break my size twelve’s in your -“Pinkie appeared behind him, giving him a noggie.

“Reapey’s been helping me make cupcakes all morning.” Forge cracked a smile.

“Reapey?” Reaper flushed, grabbing Forge by the collar and walking him out of the kitchen. Forge decided it was time to quite his teasing. “Is there anything to report Reaper?” Reaper shrugged.

“Nope, not a thing, in fact this might be the easiest-” Forge clamped his brothers mouth shut, an alarmed look on his face.

“Don’t fucking say that!” He quietly screamed at him. “These ponies get in more trouble than we did for Christ sakes! And there you go trying to screw our luck up mocking fate! Just go back in there Reapey and finish your cupcakes.” Reaper snarled as Forge chuckled. “By the way, did you get an invitation for a surprise party from a certain pink pony?”

Reaper blinked. “Ya why?”

“Because it doesn’t say when or where the parties going to happen, it just says that I’m invited to a party.” Reaper blinked then chuckled.

“That’s Pinkie for you, she’ll warn you about a surprise that’s for you.” Forge chuckled and turned toward the door.

“Alright, you stay out of trouble ‘Reapey’”

“Fuck you son….” Reaper called out as he walked back in the kitchen to start making the strawberry icing for those cupcakes…

I better go pay Longstrider next, hopefully Bon Bon’s making him pay rent Forge thought as he walked to what he now called ‘the crazy pony house’. Forge had no idea how Bon Bon put up with Hands Mcgee and the Toothanator and their craziness, a sudden picture of Longstrider tied down to a table missing hands and teeth entered his mind, making him chuckle and shiver at the same time.
And now she has to deal with Longstrider. Bon Bon must drink or she gets off of the crazinesss he thought as he got into view of the crazy pony house.

To his relief, Longstrider still had his hands as he sat on the front porch of the house, Lyra curled up on his lap as he petted her like a dog, Colgate sitting in the chair next to him. “Hey Forgey!” Longstrider called as he saw his brother “Come to check on little old me?”

Forge ignored his remark; he threw him his bits as Lyra glared at him. “Did you steal our pudding?” She demanded.

Forge raised an eyebrow. “Morning to you too Ms. Heartstrings, yes the weather is lovely.”

“You didn’t answer my question.”

“Yes I did.”

Lyra looked at him shocked. “Why?!”

Forge looked down at her, flabbergasted. “You. Kidnapped. Me. You crazy green pony. You’re lucky I didn’t arrest you for it.”

“I was looking forward to that pudding you meanie!”

Forge resisted the urge to facepalm and sighed. “I’m sorry Lyra for stealing your pudding after you kidnapped me and tried to do god knows what with my poor hands.”

Lyra beamed at him and laid her head back on Longstrider’s lap. “I forgive you!” Forge rolled his eyes as Longstrider narrowed his eyes at Forge as he finished counting his pay.

“Forge” he said “Is all of my money here?”

“Yep.” Forge replied, stone-faced.

“Are you sure?”

“Why wouldn’t I be sure? I’m the one that knows and pays your salary.” Forge could see that he didn’t believe him but the 60’s Spiderman was giving more fucks than him at the moment as something smashed into him, almost knocking him through Bon Bon’s door.

Forge and the thing that hit him groaned; looking over his shoulder he saw that it was Rainbow, her eyes spinning around their sockets as she sat on his back. Forge looked at his brother and frowned, helping Rainbow up; Lyra and Colgate seemed to of just run out of fucks to give, neither flinching as Forge took his hit.

“Why didn’t you tell me she was about to hit me?” Forge demanded.

“I didn’t see her…”

“Bullshit.”

“…. Because you didn’t give me my full paycheck; for gods sakes, this is barely enough for rent!” As he finished his sentence Bon Bon opened the door and grabbed the bag of bits, nodding at Forge and Rainbow as she walked back inside. “See? Now I’m broke!”

Forge rolled his eyes.” I don’t care; get another job like me and Reaper.” He looked at Rainbow, who was now fully recovered. “You know Rainbow; if you wanted to say hi to me you didn’t need to damn near break my back.”

Rainbow snorted and flexed her wings as Forge lit a cigar. “It was your fault for being in the way!”

He raised an eyebrow and blew smoke in her face. “That must be Rainbow for ‘I’m sorry for hitting you Forge’” He looked her over and started to make his way to Rarity’s after he had said his farewells, Rainbow tagging along.

“So it was a stunt failure right?”

“Na I just wanted to smash into you.”

“You know you probably broke one of my ribs.”

“You’ll tough it ou- Stop blowing that smoke in my face!”

“Stop being a bitch.”

“I will beat your flank off that monkey body of yours.”

“Come at me skittles.” They both snorted as they walked through Rarity’s boutique.

“Ms. Rarity, are you home?” Forge called.

“Coming~!” Rarity’s sing-songed. There was a rushed trotting down the stairs and Forge was tackled by a small white blur. Thankfully it was filly sized or Forge would be on his ass again.

“Hey Sweetie” Forge told the little filly as she hugged him “How’s it going?” Sweetie looked up at him and smiled.

“I’m doing fine, in fact the other day me and the other girls….”

Rainbow watched as Forge listened to the filly as she dragged on. How he was able to listen intently was beyond her. And she would not stop! Rainbow was about to tell her to shut it when Rarity and Fluttershy came in, Fluttershy in another one of Rarity’s dresses, it being most likely that Rarity got her to be a living mannequin, probably against her wishes. Forge smiled at them both.

“Hello ladies, I was going to see you next Ms. Fluttershy, so thank you for making my life easier. By the way Ms. Fluttershy, that dress looks nice on you.” Rarity beamed as Fluttershy became a blushing, stammering blob of adorable.

“Of course she does darling!” she told him “She’s wearing one of my creations!” Rarity suddenly started to walk around Forge with a critical eye. “You know Forger; I would love to design something for you.” her Quicksilver floated up from the counter to where it was at and formed into a quill as Rarity grabbed a piece of paper and started to draw some designs. Forge looked the Quicksilver over carefully, also checking to see where the other girls had there’s. Rainbow had hers on the tip of each of her wings and Fluttershy had it as beads in her hair.

“How are your Quicksilver’s working girls?” He asked them, looking at Rainbow carefully. Forge could tell that its side effects were really hitting her hard, the clouded eyes being a dead giveaway. He did something that he thought would make her feel better. Hand outstretched he said, “Override 3138, brisinger alpha.” Rainbow’s Quicksilver detached from her wings and floated toward his hand, snaking around it. Rainbow blinked and looked up at him, her eyes looking a whole lot clearer.

Rainbow gasped, remembering how she was treating Forge. “Omygosh! Forge, I did-“Forge raised a hand to silence her, then he patted her head assuredly.

“I know Dash, it’s the Quicksilver. I told you that it messes with your emotions; you know if you want I can unbind it from you if it’s too much.” Rainbow shook her head rigorously.

“Na its okay, I just need to get use to it. It kinda clouds your head up if you’re not careful.”

Forge chuckled and muttered under his breath, Dash’s Quicksilver floating back to her. “I just gave you each a tiny bit too! Imagine if you had as much as I do.”

She blinked and looked up at him. “How don’t you lose it?” She asked him.

Forge snorted. “I made the stuff; it’s not going to pull a fast one on me.” He looked at Rarity and Fluttershy. “Alright I need to go check on Twilight; it was nice seeing you girls!”

With that Forge and Rainbow left the store, Rarity muttering under her breath. “You will be mine Mr. Metalworker MINE!”…

“Hey Dash do me a favor and get Reaper and Longstrider and tell them to go to the market, I want to talk to them.”

Dash nodded, her wings flaring. “Alright, and I am so sorry losing it on you.” She told him, her head held low in shame. Forge just chuckled and tossed her a bit.

“If you’re sorry do me a favor and go to Roseluck’s cart and help her out with the plants that are going to the fort.”

Dash raised an eyebrow. “Just the fort? Why don’t you give it a cool name?”

“Because I’m a lazy asshole, now get going.” Dash just chuckled and saluted, flying off. Forge looked toward the giant tree and straightened his shirt, which was now slightly torn from the day’s activities; it was a miracle that Rarity hadn’t noticed the crime against fashion.

Well, time to see the ol ’niece Forge thought as he opened the libraries door she can’t be as bad- As he walked through the door something latched onto his face. Forge, having seen all of the Alien movies reacted violently.

“It’s got my face!” he screamed, trying to get whatever was on him off. “It’s going to lay eggs in my stomach and an alien baby’s going to….. to…. Wait a second….” He ripped the thing off his face, it was someponies Quicksilver. He scowled at it and looked around.

The library is a mess.

It looked like a tornado hit the place, books in piles around the room and tables overturned. In the middle of it all was a very crazy looking purple unicorn. Forge stared at Twilight, who was breathing heavily, staring back at him, her eyes and mane wild. “….Twilight? Is everything-” Twilight’s eyes rolled in the back of her head and she started to fall, Forge catching and checking to see if she was okay before she hit the ground.

“Twilight, Twilight?”

“….zzzzzzz.”

Forge chuckled, picking her up and placing her on the only couch that was upright.

“You’re Forge right?” A voice asked him, turning around Forge saw it was a baby dragon, Spike if Forge were to guess; there couldn’t be that many dragons in ponyville right?

“Yep. You’re Spike right?” He asked, using his magic to fix everything in the living room, putting books back and chairs and tables in proper positions. Spike looked alarmed for a second, and then thankful, rushing upstairs to get Twilight a blanket and wrapping it around her.

“Thanks man, you saved me a lot of cleaning.” Spike told Forge, who quietly chuckled, not wanting to wake his niece. At least he probably wasn’t going to get attacked or hurt this time, probably because Twilight worked herself to exhaustion.

He looked down at Twilight. “So she was trying to catch and study the Quicksilver?”

Spike nodded. “Yep, for the last 3 days she’s been keeping me up.” Forge looked Spike up and down. He knew a lot about dragons, being taught smithing by one and all, so he wanted to ask some questions about him; Twilight’s lack of knowledge could be harmful to the dragon.

“Hey Spike, how old are you?” He said.

“I’ll be 16 next week, why?”

Forge sighed good he still has time. He thought as he smiled at the dragon. “No reason, just do me a favor and tell Twilight that I need to see you after your birthday okay.”

“Why?”

“For health reasons little guy.” Spike grumbled about being called little but complied as Forge bid him farewell and left, whistling a tune. The ponies had accepted his presence pretty quickly; he even got waved at by a few ponies, each of which he returned by a head nod ponies can change attitudes toward people pretty quick. I wonder if they took the boards off their windows? He mused silently, looking around at the small town .

As he decided to look around some more, preferably somewhere he could get a bit to eat, when he heard it, the voice from hell, the voice that kept him up at night, a voice that had just a hint of I’m-going-to-rape-you-Forge in it.

“FORGEY!!!!”

Forge froze in place as he saw the massive shadow that was now above ponyville. His mind went blank from fear for a few seconds. When he came to he realized who would bring that terror to Equestria. “I’m going to get Longstrider to bang a pony on Tia’s throne if I get out of this.” He said as he took off toward the direction of his home, running as fast as his legs could take him….

1000 views

Thanks everyone for reading my little story, thanks to you I can finally say that one of my stories got a 1000 views!

Dragons be trippin

“…Thanks Dash!” Reaper said as Rainbow trotted over to Roseluck’s stand, Reaper and Longstrider eyeing her flank as her tail swooshed back and forth.

“I’m hitting that shit as soon as possible.” Longstrider commented, Reaper chuckling at white people antics.

“You do you honkey.”

“Did you get with Pinkie yet?”

Reaper snorted. “You don’t stick your dick in crazy.”

Longstrider smirked. “That’s never stopped you before.”

“Fuc- look it’s Forge. FORGE!” A panicked Forge ignored them running through the market doing a classic Jack Sparrow, a silly run where your arms flail around while your knees are hitting your chest as you ran and you wear an expression between shock and terror.

To top it off Forge had a cigar that looked ready to fall out of his mouth as he repeated the same phrase over and over again, “NOPENOPENOPENOPENOPE!” as he jumped over a cart as he headed toward The Fort.

There was a pregnant silence between the 2 humans.

“What the fuck’s wrong with him?” Reaper shrugged and looked up in the air, seeing the cause of Forges distress. Laughing and nudging Longstrider, he pointed upwards. Longstrider looked up and started to laugh his ass off with his brother. Above them, miles up into the air, was a massive red dragon flying down right at them, a smile on its face.
The closer the dragon got to the ground the smaller it got; the ponies finally noticing a dragon was diving toward them and panicking, running around and screaming in fright, Reaper and Longstrider just smiled at the whole thing, used to the dragons antics. About 30 feet from the ground the dragon was about the size of Reaper.

BOOM

The dragon landed, making a crater and shooting dust all through the air, leaving ponies coughing and frightened. Looking nervously at each other the ponies looked on to the humans, hoping that they would charge in and protect them, but all they did was wait for the dust to clear, smiling.

Reaper cupped his hands to his mouth and yelled, “Good one Seleis! You really got’em.”

To the ponies shock a very feminine voice whined and said, “Not you guys though?”

Both of the humans laughed as powerful wings dispersed the dust, revealing a slender blood red dragon. If you looked closely you could see smooth spikes exactly like Spike’s along her back reaching to the top her head and a pair of big ocean blue eyes. If you looked closer you could make out that the dragon (its curves indicating that it was probably a female) had some lipstick on with eyeliner and her hair was bound up in a ponytail.

(Kinda like this but without the cloths)

The ponies expected an epic battle between them, but that wasn’t the case.

“Reaper, Longstrider!” The dragon now named Seleis rushed over to the humans, hugging them both so tightly that they were lifted off the ground.

Almost without exception everypony that was watching jaw’s hit the ground in shock as the humans and dragon conversed.

“What are you doing here Sel’s?” Reaper asked as the dragon now called Seleis put them back down. The dragoness beamed and hugged him again, almost breaking his ribs.

“Tia wants me to teach some young dragon living here.”

“Spike?” Seleis shrugged.

“I have no idea, I gotta go to Canterlot to talk to Tia about the whole thing, I just wanted to say hi to you guys first.” She looked past both the humans and saw the faint outline of Forge running. Smiling she gave them each a quick final hug. “Alright guys, see you in a couple of days!” With a powerful flap of her wings she launched into air, going in the direction that Forge was fleeing to.

Reaper and Longstrider looked at each other, both smiling.

“50 bits she gets Forge this time.” Longstrider thought it over and nodded.

“You’re on.”

Like a lot of people, Forge smoked to relieve stress, like he was now doing, 3 cigars in his mouth as he grabbed whatever he needed in his room to escape. Alright Forge thought as he tore through his room, putting cloths, some food that he had taken from the mess hall, and his blanket into a duffel bag all I need to do is get into the forest, then I’ll live like a hermit for the rest of my life. Yep, that’s an awesome idea. With that Forge broke down his own door and made a beeline for the forest.

As he made it to the tree line he looked back and laughed, he wasn’t going to get raped by a dragon today! He could make out 2 ponies going into his compound, probably Dash and Roseluck getting his flowers, not that he was going to be needing them anytime soon, after all he was now going to be a hermit in the forest! Chuckling to himself he reached into his pocket for another cigar. Finding none, he frowned. Fuck! I forgot them back in my room! He thought as he whimpered in misery.

Now Forge had an inner battle raging inside himself, one if he went back there was a good chance of getting raped, but if he didn’t then he wouldn’t have his sweet ass cigars; they were the good ones too, imported all the way from Mexicolt. Steeling himself he turned toward the forest to flee but couldn’t, the cigars like a beacon for his poor soul to bask in their smokey goodness.

Sighing in defeat he raced back to the compound. Maybe Seleis made a wrong turn and he could get his smokes and run into the forest without her noticing, hell he hadn’t seen hide nor hare of her since he made it to the fort…..

“Thanks for the help Dash.” Roseluck said as she put the last plant down, wiping the sweat from her brow. Dash nodded her head and continued to take in everything she was seeing. There’s a gym here?! Awesome! I bet- Turning around she saw that one of the doors to a cabin was a couple feet away from her, a big crack down the middle of it, why if she didn’t know any better she’d say that it had been kicked down.

What the ha- something launched itself over her, Rainbow was ready to defend herself, wings outstretched, but there was no need, it was just Forge.

There was something odd about him though, he looked like something was going to come out of the sky and get him. He ran into the room without a door and grabbed a wooden box and crammed in into a very messy looking duffel bag then grabbed a piece of paper and a quill, wrote something on it and light it up like Spike would. Rainbow, looking him over, now concerned about his mental stability. Roseluck on the other hand, either didn’t notice that Forge was losing his mind or she didn’t care, probably the latter in Dash’s opinion.

She waved at him as he was attempting to flee. “Hey big guy! I got your plants right here.” She told him cheerfully, grabbing and dragging him over to the flowers, making Forge stop and look them over. He whistled, the mare knew her stuff, he couldn’t of asked for better plants. In fact he was so preoccupied looking them over he forgot about why he was fleeing in the first place.

“Good picks Rose.” Forge commented, walking over to the plants and kneeling down to examine all of the roses, lilies, and others that he couldn’t identify. Rainbow sighed in relief; at least Forge looked a lot calmer now. Rose beamed up at him, trotting over to him and bumping him with her flank.

“The best your money could buy!” She told him jokingly. “I got those fire flowers the other day and I thought they would look great with-“

BOOM

Forge’s eyes bugged out of his head in fright, now remembering why he was trying to run away in the first place, the reason picking him up into the air in a tight hug, something between a pig’s squeal and a child’s whimper coming out of Forge’s mouth as he tried to get away.

“Forgey!” Seleis purred as Forge frantically tried to escape her grasp, both Rainbow and Rose’s mouths agape as the odd spectacle.

OsweetChristI’mgoingtogetrappedIgottagetawayIgottagetawayIgottagetaway Forge thought as he finally wiggled out of the dragonesses grasp, looking for an escape route as he hyperventilated. Seleis just smiled sweetly up at him, taking a step toward him, Forge taking a step back, pure terror written all over his face.

“Didn’t you miss me Forgey?”

Step. Back step.

“I came all the way from the dragon lands to see you. Doesn’t that earn me a kiss?”

Step. Back step.

Seleis strutted closer to Forge, giving the panicked human bedroom eyes and a toothy grin. They both knew that Forge couldn’t outrun her, but Seleis did love a good chase.

HowamIgoingtogetawayOgodI’mnotgoinggettingawaywaitIneedtocalmdownand- Suddenly he had a glorious idea. His head down to look submissive he whimpered and said, “Alright Seleis you got me.” Seleis looked disappointed and thrilled at the same time at the turn of events

“Really?” She asked as Forge walked over to her, defeated. He was finally going to love her? Awesome! Now she could break in that big di-. In the blink of an eye she was thrown into Forge’s room by the blacksmith as he jumped on a surprised Rainbow’s back, who had been watching the whole scene with Rose with the perfect mixture of confusion and amusement.

“Fllllllllyyyyyy!!!!” Forge screamed, digging his heels into Rainbow painfully as Seleis came out of his room, a big smile in her face.

“OWWWWW!!!!” Rainbow hollered, taking off as Forge steered her, both of them screaming as the dragon followed closely behind, laughing her scaly ass off.

“FASTERRAINBOWFASTERORI’MGOINGTOBERAPED!!!!!”

“GETOFFOFMEFORCELESTIA”SSAKE!!”

Steering her right above the forest he looked back, seeing the dragon right behind him. Weighting his chances of falling high up into a dangerous forest and not dying there and making sure that he would lose the dragon Forge shrugged. YOLO he thought as he hopped off of Rainbow’s back and made himself as small as possible as he fell.

Seleis grinned and she dived after him, her claws outstretched to catch the human. She got a hands length away when Forges Quicksilver shot out from his wrist and covered her face, making her stop as Forge made his way through the tree line and hitting the ground pretty hard.

“I SURVIVED!” Forge shouted as he sprinted through the forest, his quicksilver detaching from Seleis’s face.
Seleis sighed. “Cheater….” She muttered, a small smile in her face. Now that he was in the forest she was no way that she was going to get him now. They both were going to same way though so the chase was kinda still on. Looking up at a pissed off Rainbow Dash she chuckled and watched Forge stumble off in the direction of Canterlot.

“Gods I love that man.” She said as she flew to Canterlot to see what Tia wanted. Seleis had to admit that this was the most fun that she had had in years. And it feels like it’s going to get better!

Canterlot Royal Gardens 5:45 a.m.

That could have been worse… I still got a fucking job to do, the underappreciated life of a bachelor hermit’s gonna have to wait Forge thought as he watched the guardsponies patrol from up one of the gardens trees. The whole day they had amped the number of guards up to watch out for an attack on the princesses by a certain large human with glowing blue eyes who had a taste for gardening and long walks on the beach.

It would have been 3 humans but because of the hectic day he couldn’t tell them so he would have to do the killings himself. Forge had already taken out 3 patrols and all he needed to do was get through the gardens to get to Celestia’s room, Luna had already been dealt with in a quiet and clean way.

Forge looked down at his now ring covered hands, the rings the main thing that helped him commit his crimes. One ring to make him as silent as Reaper, one for cloud walking, one to keep his eyes from glowing, and one to detect other beings. Warlock always made the best and it still showed, not that he had ever used a unicorns gear anyways. With a sigh Forge looked at his next targets, enjoying their conversation, the last they would have in this life if he had anything to do with it.

There were 2, a stallion and a mare, but the odd one was the mare. Luna had told him what the batponies that were her royal guard were called, some sweet ass name that had something to do with the night, but Forge couldn’t for the life of him remember what it was so batponies they were.

The stallion was snow white with the shotty armor that signified him as a member of the day guard; the mare had her night guard armor on. If the armor was supposed to be intimidating it wasn’t working, to Forge they both looked adorable like every pony he saw.

The batmare was the one that be had to watch out for out of the 2 of them, with her midnight blue coat and glowing golden eyes. From his Intel he knew that her hearing was much better than any normal ponies, if he wasn’t careful she would pick up the vibrations of him moving. Coupled with the fact that she could see in the dark as well as he could would make killing them difficult, like the other 3 patrols, not including the guards that were at Luna’s door… Forge smiled and pulled out his weapons, ready to bring death to the unsuspecting ponies….

To say that Private CloudSkipper was having a rough day would be an understatement. For the past 20 hours the whole guard had been running themselves ragged watching out for the human’s attack, himself included. To top it all off they were told that he could come from literary anywhere and was a master at fighting at nighttime made it much worse.

“Come on, talk to me Skippy.”

This bad situation was made a thousand times worse because of the mare that they had hooked him up with, NightWing. Now Cloud understood why he was paired up with a member of the night watch, their hyper sensitive hearing and ability to see in the dark was probably the thing that was going to catch the human. But why in Celestia’s shiny beard did it have to be one of the most irresponsible members of the night guard? Was it because his commander hated his guts? Cloud thought so.

“Skippy” Poke “talk to me” Poke “I’m getting bored.” Poke.

Cloud gritted his teeth and looked at the mare. “NightWing” he said, trying to control his anger “We are watching out for maybe one of the most dangerous things in all of Equestria, something that has gone toe-to-toe with Discord and lived to tell about it more than once, someone that we should be quietly watching out for so he doesn’t kill our beloved monarchs, and you want to have a nice little chat about?....”

NightWing looked over at him innocently, pulling out a stack of cards from somewhere in her armor. “I just wanted to see if you wanted to play a game of Poke-her.”

Cloud raised an eyebrow. “Don’t you mean Poker?”

NightWing gave him a sultry look and winked. “Nope, Poke-her, if you win you get to ‘poke’ me if you get my meaning.” She giggled as Cloud blushed, nudging the poor stallion.

Cloud tried to regain control of a now very inappropriate conversation. “We have to watch out for the captain, so stand up straight and shut up.” He firmly said, getting into ‘guards stance’ eyes straight ahead, looking for any signs of blue in the forest as NightWing pout.

“Come on Skippy-“

“Stop calling me Skippy”

“-there’s no way the big bad human’s going to be coming this way.” She told him “First off, he’d have to climb up the mountain, get over the walls, and get past about a thousand patrols to be even remotely close to us.”

Cloud blinked incredulously, upset that she wasn’t taking this seriously, like everything that she did as a guardsmare. Puffing out his chest, ready to give her a piece of his mind, when Night looked up, her face a mask of concentration, her ears moving back and forth, she had picked up something up with her bat ears. Cloud gulped, looking around, hoping that it was just a leaf or maybe one of the gardens many bunnies…

After a few tense seconds NightWing relaxed. “It’s okay Skippy” she told him “I guess it was nothing…”

“Wrong” A voice behind the both of them said.

Both of the ponies training kicked in. Their wings shot out as they tried to get away, but it was no use. They both felt something cold go across their throats, signaling their deaths…..

“O horseapples, I’ll never get this lipstick out of my coat!” Cloud whined as the human sat down cross-legged behind them, smirking.

“At least you did better than the other ones.” Forge commented as he levitated his box of donuts and coffee’s from the tree that he was hiding in.

Remembering that he was in the presents of a superior officer, Cloud saluted. Night just looked the human up and down, not impressed. “You’re it?” Cloud looked on shocked as Forge chuckled.

“Enough to kill you two, and that’s ‘sir’ to you Private. O and by the way you liege is dead, had to take out 3 patrols to get to her.” Night scrunched up her face and looked at the line of lipstick that was on her neck.

“What’s stopping me from yelling out right now?” She asked him, Cloud still trying to get the lipstick off of his neck.

Forge shrugged and pulled out a 2x4 with nails sticking out of it out of his belt, looking her over. “If you yell I’ll consider you a zombie and I’ll beat you with this.” He said, bringing his point across by wiggling his weapon. Both of the ponies looked at each other.

“We’re dead.” They said at the same time. Forge grinned and sat back down, waving them over, opening up his box of donuts.

“Come on these are for the ponies that were the closest to sounding the alarm, good job Private’s-” Cloud’s chest puffed out in pride.

“-Is what I would of said if it still wasn’t a piss poor attempt.” Cloud deflated as Forge went on, handing them a cup of coffee. “But I can’t finish all of this stuff so eat up.” Both Forge and Night took a sip of coffee as Cloud looked down at his. He mentally shrugged at his misfortune, they were supposed to go back to training camp anyway, something that he really wasn’t looking forward to, but hey at least he had some hot, delicious…

Cloud took a sip and sip it right back out. “That’s awful!” He almost yelled. Night and Forge looked at each other and took another sip of each of their respective cups.

“Taste fine to me.” Night remarked offhandly.

Forge looked the now nervous Cloud up and down, judging him with his eyes. Cloud started to sweat under his gaze. Sweet Celestia, It feels like he’s looking into my soul. Cloud thought as Forge shook his head at the stallion and stood up, finishing his coffee.

“Alright fillies, I gotta to go kill my sister, enjoy the sweets.” Both of the ponies watched as the human walked up to the wall of the castle, Celestia’s window about 50 feet up. Willing his Quicksilver to his hands and forming them into climbing claws he took a good jump and started to climb, now ignoring the 2 ponies below him; one looking on in confusion and the other digging into the box of donuts.

Cloud could feel the beginnings of a migraine coming on as he looked over to NightWing, who looked innocently at him, half a donut in her mouth. Swallowing she looked at him and gave him her best puppy dog eyes. “Can I eat all of these?”…

Forge silently hopped into Celestia’s chambers grinning like a mad man. Now it’s your turn you giant white trolling bitch. Forge thought as he pulled out a special tube of lipstick, it was a purple color and the kind that was impossible to get off of you, especially if you have a coat.

Celestia brought Seleis here, O she might deny it or come up with some weak excuse as to why she was needed here but Forge knew better.

And he was going to fuck her face up because of it.

Nearing the edge of Tia’s bed he raised the lipstick like a murderer would do with a knife and stopped, a concerned looked now creeping onto his face. Something wasn’t right. It was about 6 in the morning so she should be awake already, not to mention he never remembered Tia ever sleeping with the covers over her horn like that. Forge backed away from the bed as slowly as possible. It’s a tra-

“FORGEY!” The covers were thrown off the bed, revealing Seleis. Forge almost got made it off the balcony before the dragon caught him. “No you don’t big guy.” The dragon said, grabbing him as he tried to launch himself off the balcony. Forge panicked, grabbing the railing and looking over the edge, seeing NightWing and CloudSkipper still eating their donuts.

“NO! Jesus, Allah, Buddha, one of you fuckers help me!” Forge demanded as the dragon ripped him off the railing and nuzzled him, trying to wrap her wings around him in a tight hug as the blacksmith tried to wiggle out of her grasp.

As Forge tried was almost free he noticed that she was shaking. He looked down at her to see tears in the dragoness’s eyes. Forge mentally groaned Fuuuuucccckkk Now I feel bad, fucking lady dragons and their feelings. Overcoming his fears of this particular dragon, he hugged her back, much to Seleis’s surprise. In response she hugged him tighter, her wings fully wrapped around him in the tightest embrace she could manage, placing her head on his shoulder and letting out a contented sigh.

“How’s your dad Seleis?” Forge asked.

Seleis looked up at him and smiled, Forge trying not to run away. “He’s fine, the same old drake that wants me to marry some hatchling” she gave him a peck on the cheek, Forge’s bravery crumbling as he finally wiggling out of her grasp, much to her amusement “but there’s only one that has my heart.” She swayed her hips suggestively and winked. Forge flinching again.

She giggled, walking past him toward the balcony, scratching Forge under his chin with her tail, and hopped off the edge, wings outstretched, leaving Forge alone in Celestia’s room.

Forge let out a sigh, then frowned when he heard a giggle in the room. “Tia” Forge growled “That wasn’t fucking funny.” The giggling got louder as Celestia stopped the invisibility spell that she had put on herself.

She walked over to him, her head held high, proud of her prank.

SWOOSH

Celestia just got out of the way in time, diving out of the way as Forge rushed her, breaking one of her tables as he missed, murder in his eyes and lipstick in his hand. He made another run at her, Celestia trying to take flight, but she didn’t take off fast enough.

“NO NO NO! Forge don’t- FUCK ME UP THE ASS!”

Forge looked at Celestia surprised. “Christ, watch your mouth Tia.” He told a now joker looking and grumpy princess.

“*eyeroll* Come on Tia it’s not that bad- DON”T GRAB TH- fuck….” Muttered a now also joker looking Forge, Celestia looking on in triumph. They stared each other down for a few moments.

“…”

“…”

“…Puff*snort*”

“…*snort*”

They couldn’t hold back the laughter as Celestia raised the sun, coming back into the room and giving Forge a hug.

“Dare I ask it? What did you do to Luna?”

“Nothing, just tucked her in.” She shot her a look the showed him she didn’t believe him. Forge shrugged, ruffling her mane and walking to the edge of the balcony. “Don’t believe me if you want, just tell the guards to pack a toothbrush and jammies, they’re hell awaits. Bye Tia!” With that Forge hopped off the balcony.

Celestia sighed, leaving her room to check on her sister, not believing Forge for a second. Upon entering her sister’s room she saw the midnight blue filly asleep in her bed, completely untouched. Celestia smiled at least- She took another step forward but tripped a tripwire that she hadn’t seen, and in a flash she was covered in bananas. Celestia frowned in her banana prison; she could almost hear Forge’s laughter…

Ponyville 8:00 am

At least it was a good run Forge thought as he walked through the middle of ponyville, ignoring the looks ponies were giving him at his chaotic state. He heard laughter and turning around he saw Reaper and Longstrider exchanging money. Forge growled.

“You fuckers bet on my ass?!” The other 2 humans looked at each other and shrugged.

“YOLO” Reaper told him, counting out his money.

“I’m going to shove my foot so far up your asses that you’ll taste the leather!” Forge snarled, walking threatingly toward them. The two just rolled their eyes.

“You know that you missed our welcome party; Pinkie was pretty pissed, there was cake and booze; hell Vinyl was even throwing down some sick beats.” Longstrider said offhandedly, not worrying about his appending doom.

This caused Forge’s path to destroy his brothers to falter, he was really looking forward to that…. Then he got over it, there would be plenty of parties in the future.

“Alright, both of you come over in the next couple of days to get reoutfitted, the trainees are coming in a couple of days.” After getting promises from his brother, Forge made it back to the fort in one piece, saying hello to his housemates Forge went to his smithy, carrying his old torn up armor.

Time to fix this hunk of junk back up He thought as he lit a Forge and reached for a hammer….

“ARE YOU READY FOR BLOOD?” The hoard of goblins roared, beating whatever weapon that they had against a shield.

“FOR DEATH?” Another roar. The human never considered himself a public speaker but he did have his moments.

“WE WILL MAKE THOSE DOGS PAY FOR IGNORING OUR HAND OF FRIENDSHIP BY CHOKING THEM WITH IT!” If he was honest with himself it really wasn’t one of those moments, but hey, the goblins were stupid enough that any speech was like one from Mr. King.

“BE UNLEASHED MY HOARD!” With that the goblins raced out of the cave, the human face palming, they were about a hundred miles from their destination, going to attack a clan of diamond gods right outside of a town called ponyville and they were going to run the whole way?

“I need to get some better minions….”

Forge woke up with a start, his eyes still closed That was a weird dream he thought as he tried to drift back into dreamland, holding his teddy bear in a tight embrace. My nice warm teddy- Forge stopped that thought, realizing a couple of things.

One: The last time he had a teddy bear was when he was 7.

Two: He’s almost 70 years old now.

Three: Grown ass men don’t have teddy bears

This teddy bear was weird too, it was warm and scaly and- Aw fucccccckkkk Forge thought as his ‘teddy bear’ used her claws to slide his hands down to her rump.

Maybe I’m still dreaming Forge sighed, not even believing his own attempts to calm himself. Opening an eye he was face-to-face with Seleis, who was smiling sweetly at him…

Now you know those cartoons where the character jumps through the bed when he or she is frightened? Well that didn’t happen, Forge was too cheap to buy another mattress. So instead he rolled out from under the bed screaming, Seleis sighing from under it.

“And just when we were getting to the good part….”

A Rude Welcome

The pack leader looked on his people, watching them scurrying around at the mouth of cave going about their business. Everything was as it should be, the bitches carrying the water into the cave for the gem diggers as some of the mutts guarded the mouth of cave from predators. This pack was a well-oiled machine, efficient,-

“Damnit Soft Paws!”

The pack leader sighed, mentally cursing his luck as he watched his youngest, Soft Paws, drop her bucket for the sixth time that day. That pony with the silly hat wasn’t helping matters, the mare wouldn’t leave them alone, doing tricks and telling them how great and powerful she was. If their treaty wasn’t so solid with the sun princess the alpha would of just made her into a pony- cabob.

“For stone’s sake Soft Paws!” the alpha snarled at the runt, who flinched. “Do something right for once and Get.The.Water.Now. You drop it this time you’re sleeping outside the cave tonight.” Soft Paws nodded and hurried back to the watering hole. The alpha sighed, that pup was getting on his nerves very very quickly today.

She was the smallest of her brothers and sisters and had the great talent of ruining everything she touched, making the alpha wish, not for the first time, that he had just let her die in the woods. But NOOOOO! Her mother’s final wish was that she nurtured. If he hadn’t loved her so much…

The alpha shook off the thought and snarled as the pony jumped into the air, fireworks shooting all around her. The alpha had had enough “Get that pony out of my sight!” He snarled at two of the guards, both of them nodding, running over to the pony and bodily grabbing her, the pony shrieking as they carried her into the forest.

“That’s better.” The alpha muttered to himself, leaning his back against the cave. The wind picked up, the alpha’s sensitive nose picking something odd. It almost reminded him of the creature that he talked to a while ago, the alpha growled at the memory.

That ignorant fool had brought those demons with him and then demanded that they mine gems for him, for free! Not only had he brought with him the diamond dogs greatest enemies, he had threatened to destroy them if they didn’t do as he said, hell, he even killed two of his sons when he escaped the alpha’s wraith, just to spit him.

The alpha looked up at the roof of the cave and smiled at the goblins heads that were spiked there, at least they had killed-

BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR-

All of the dogs looked up, those sounded like war horns.

“Get everydog inside!” The alpha roared, the dogs running into the cave as the mutts ran into the cave to get there weapons and armor, they knew those horns. That bastard creature was back…..

Soft Paws muttered angrily as she walked to the pond to get some more water. She knew that most of the pack didn’t like her; they said she was ‘klutz’ and a ‘walking disaster’ but at least she tried! So what she spilled some water? Or lit that cart on fire? Or-

Soft Paws whimpered to herself, who was she kidding? Her pack hated her. She was-

“Release the great and powerful Trixieeeeeee!” Soft Paws looked up to see that magic pony fly through the air and land right next to her with a thud, two of her pack mates the throwers.

“Stay away if you know what’s good for you pony!” One of them yelled before disappearing back to the forest. Soft Paws sighed as she helped the pony to her hooves, her pack mates were the meanest sometimes…

“Are you okay?” she asked the mare, who was busting off her cape and hat.

“The great and powerful Trixie is fine, no thanks to those MUTTS!” the mare now named Trixie spat. “She will take her show to somepony more-“

BRRRRRRRRRRRR-

Soft Paw perked her ears, was that a horn?...

Soft Paws looked at Trixie, who looked back at her, a mixture of fear and confusion on her face. I should get back Soft Paws thought as she started to walk into the forest, but the rustling of the trees stopped her. Taking a step back she gulped, seeing ugly black figures moving in all around them she looked over to the now scared Trixie.

“Run.” Soft Paws simply said, dropping her bucket and taking off as fast as her paws could take her, Trixie following closely behind, both of them screaming their heads off as a hoard of goblins chased after them, thirsty for their blood….

The process of putting on armor was one that Forge had gotten very good at, not perfect mind you, most of the time he strapped his arm guards too tight, but he was still good enough to dress himself in under 10 minutes. First went on the boots, then the leg guards, followed by his chain mail and so on. That is what Forge was doing today, looking nice and pretty for the new recruits today.

In his opinion he could have just worn his sword and some sweatpants and it would have been fine, but Tia was a stickler for presentation. So it was armor for him, Reaper’s assassin outfit for Reaper, and Longstrider in his stupid looking jerkin with that god awful hat of his. Unnecessary but what were you going to do?

Forge always preferred to put his armor on himself, even though it was the pain in the ass, saying that it was the most calming thing that he had ever and will ever do in his life, besides hammering that is. With the final strap put in place he was finished, just rolling his shoulders and moving around to see if he was restricted at all or not.

Finding that the armor fit right Forge smiled, grabbing his helmet and walking out of his room where Vinyl, Octavia, and Chrysalis were waiting for him.

Vinyl whistled. “You’re looking dressed to kill big guy.” She chuckled at her own joke as Forge snorted.

“Good one…” He said, rolling his eyes. “Now remember that you girls leave have to the soldiers alone, that means you Vinyl.”

“What makes you so sure that I’d do something?!”

“Because you’re you.”

Before Vinyl could retort Octavia stuck a hoof in her mouth. “Don’t worry Forge; I’ll make sure she’s… civil toward the recruits.”

Forge nodded his thanks as Vinyl and Octavia left Forge and Chrissy. Forge motioned for her to follow him as he walked to where the troops were waiting at.

“Are you sure that I’m not going to get killed by one of your recruits?” Chrissy asked, worried for her safety.

Forge snorted. “If they try they’ll regret it.”

“That doesn’t answer my question…” Forge turned to the changeling.

“You’ll be fine Chrissy, I promise. Now go mind the shop.”

Chrissy muttered darkly but went to the shop anyway as Forge walked out of his home to start the idiotic show that was this ceremony. What he found when he got there didn’t impress him, 300 day guard and 100 night guard ponies, all of them standing at attention as Forge got up on the stage, his brothers and sisters already there.

Taking his place next to Celestia he scanned over the troops, realizing that one of the most important one of the guards in Forge’s opinion. Leaning over to his sister Forge asked, “Tia, where’s the cook?” Celestia flinched.

“I hoped you wouldn’t notice.” Forge raised an eyebrow.

“What the fuck do you mean? We need a goddamn cook!”

“Nopony wanted the job…”

“Why the fuck not?!”

“Because of the others that you’re going to train.”

“What do you-” Forge began when he was interrupted by what sounded like an eagle’s cry, a sound that Forge and the other humans had heard many times. Growling Forge put on his helmet and ripped out his sword from its sheath, Longstrider readying an arrow, and Reaper pulling out daggers as what looked to be about a 100 fully armored griffins flew down and landed in a neat row next to the other troops.

The humans training kicked in, each of them trying to attack their longtime enemies. But before any of them could land a blow Luna and Celestia stood in their way.

“Stop it for the sun’s sake.” Celestia said with an eye roll “You know that they’re our allies.”

“What are these pigeons doing here Tia?” Reaper hissed as the leader of the griffins flew up to the stage, a big hen with black feathers and piercing green eyes. She looked about as happy to see the thanes as they of her.

“Captain Steel Wing reporting for training princesses.” The griffin said, ignoring the humans as she saluted the monarchs. The humans put away their weapons and grabbed Tia and Luna, moving then away from the griffin, who they were giving dirty looks.

“What are griffins doing there?” Forge demanded. Celestia sighed.

“They’re here for training too, the griffin’s empress wanted her troops to receive the best training possible. That’s why there’s no cook, nopony wanted to cook for griffins and I know you wouldn’t have a griffin cook.” The humans growled, to them the griffins were still there most hated enemies. Celestia sighed, she knew that this was going to happen, that’s why she didn’t let them know until it was too late for them to act against it.

“Look” Celestia said, trying to calm the humans “I know you don’t like it but I am your princess, and I’m ordering you to do it.”

Before any of the humans could rebuttal, something that would have been along the lines of fuck you miss daisy, they heard a pair of screams. Looking down the road they saw a diamond dog and a pony running helter skelter down the road being chased by something that Celestia had said died out a long time ago, many something’s in fact. All of the troops looked at the goblins, the griffins spreading their wings ready to fight and the ponies surrounding their princesses, some tackling them to the ground, as Forge looked over to Celestia and snorted.

“They’re all dead eh Tia?” He asked a bewildered Celestia as he and the other thanes jumped off the stage and charged their other old enemy, Forge laughing as he ripped his sword out of its sheath…

Soft Paws was not a happy camper. She had been running for about an hour, the only thing keeping her running adrenaline and her not wanting to die. She was tiring though, getting slower and slower, so she could almost feeling the monsters foul breath on the back of her neck. As she and Trixie broke the tree line she saw a large group of guardsponies.

The sight filled her with relief. Thank the stone she thought they can save me! As she got closer to them she saw something running toward her very quickly. The closer it got the worse she felt, the thing that was running toward her looked like it had come straight out of Tartarus. It was a giant metal beast with a helmet right out of her nightmares, the worst part? It had a sword in hand and it sounded like it was laughing.

Soft Paws whimpered to herself, stopping and curling into a ball, her paws covering her face, ready for her death as the monster in front of her got in arm’s length.

A death that never came.

Forge ran past the diamond dog to tackle the goblin that was about to run the dog through, gutting it before it could get up, the blue pony not stopping for an instant.

Blocking a spear thrust Forge kept laughing. This, this was what he was made for! Gutting another goblin watched as a pair of the creatures fall over dead, each of them with arrows sticking out of their eyes.

The goblins started to back away as Forge kept cutting them down, none of the monsters ready for such a stiff fight, none of them noticing that Reaper had gotten behind them, effectively cutting off their escape. A few arrow shots and chops later the group of goblins were decimated.

Forge wiped the grime and blood from his helmet, frowning at the stupefied group of griffins and ponies that had not helped them at all.

“Thanks assholes!” He called over to them as he walked over to the diamond dog, looking her over. She was about 6 foot with light brown coat and wearing a red vest with some torn up pants. Forge really couldn’t get any better look at her; she was still on the ground curled up in a ball covering her eyes with her paws, shaking like a leaf.

Why aren’t I dead yet Soft Paws thought as she heard screams all around her, making her shake all the harder. It wasn’t until it had gotten dead silent did she get curious. Risking it she opened an eye to see the monster from earlier, except instead of the scary helmet being on it was under the creatures arm, revealing a concerned face with glowing eyes.

She tried to look around but was stopped. “None of that girl, just look at me, you’ll sleep better.”

She looked up tearfully at the metal creature. “Y-you saved me?” She shakily asked, showing off her blue eyes. She was greeted with a warm smile as the creature helped her up.

“Yes I-“Forge began as Soft Paws tackled him in a hug, Forge struggling to stay up as the dog cried on his shoulder. “Shh. It’s okay, you’re safe.” Forge said, holding the terrified dog in his arms as he walked over to the ponies, most of them still too surprised to be sick at the sight and smell of bodies everywhere.

Forge turned toward Longstrider. “Make sure that there are no more of those bastards around.”

“Alright.” Longstrider said, his wings coming out of his back and flying into the air. Trying to calm the dog that had a death grip on him he walked over to where the ponies had tackled his sisters on the ground, both of whom were just getting to their hooves.

“The great and powerful Trixie survived!” Trixie yelled jumping into the air in victory, still breathing heavily and covered in sweat. Reaper stood next to Forge and looked the pony over.

“Sweet Christ that’s the most adorable pony I’ve ever seen.” Reaper commented as he looked Trixie over. “Look at that cape and hat, and she even talks in third person! I bet if you hug her she squeaks.” Forge nodded in agreement as Trixie walked over to them.

Taking off her hat Trixie said, “Trixie thanks you for helping her cr-” As Forge’s luck would have it another group of goblins broke through the tree line. Forge sighed and looked around. The ponies tackled Tia and Luna again, so they wouldn’t be any help. Longstrider was nowhere to be seen and the ponies were useless, and it got better as Trixie jumped on Forge’s other side screaming, Forge now armless holding both of them up.

“Fucking-”

Letting out a chorus of cries the griffins took off toward the goblins, their curved blades in claw.

“Don’t use your beaks, their blood is poisonous.” Forge casually called as he started to kick the ponies off of his sisters. “These two can help you stupid fucks and Mrs. Trixie can you please get the fuck off of me so I don’t get cut into pieces?” But there was no need, unlike the guardsponies the griffins weren’t useless, they took out the monsters with little problem.

Forge had to give credit where credit was do as the captain flew over to them still covered in black blood. “Well struck bird.” He said, outstretching a hand which the griffin took.

“Well struck yourself monkey.” She answered, ruffling her feathers. “Say, do you have a showering facility? Kinda what to get this blood off and I’m sure that the rest of my company want to too.”

“Next to the gym, if you reach the mess hall then you’ve gone too far.” Nodding her thanks she let out a shrill cry and took off into the air, her company following.

Forge looked at the diamond dog that he was still holding, she was fast asleep, still holding him in a death grip. The long and trying day must of tuckered her out. Sighing he looked at Celestia.

“Tia, can you get rid of the bodies? Soon these ponies are going to stop being shocked and I’m not watching a bunch of ponies throwing up.” Forge face palmed. “O I forgot, you wanted me to address the troops” he said sarcastically as he turned to the bewildered group of ponies and turning on the fake cheer. “Welcome to my fort ponies I am Captain Forge, welcome to basic training!” Rolling his eyes he walked past the ponies toward the fort.

Celestia couldn’t help but snort. His casual manner to all of this was almost ridiculous, he should be more sensitive toward the ponies; they had never seen death on this scale. She was sure that some of them might even be scarred after this. Looking toward her sister who nodded, both of them pointing their horns at the mass of dead and charging their horns, they incinerated what was left of the goblins leaving only black grass.

Turning back toward the ponies Celestia smiled weakly. “Good work my little ponies….”

Over at Golden Oaks Library…..

Seleis took another sip of her tea as she looked around at what was going to be her home for a while, as well as her new fellow housemates. The dragon was a cool little guy, excited but not trying to tear her scales out for questions about their kind.

The purple unicorn didn’t share his sentiments.

As she took another sip Seleis was considering strongly about just eating the unicorn; that would shut her up. Maybe lighting her on fire? Shoving a ruby up her ass? Any of those could work. Seleis started to wonder about how Tia would take any of those as she kept ignoring Twilight, who was still trying to talk to her. Her thoughts then shifted to her favorite human.

He was probably working out, his muscles flexing as he pounded out a sword…. Her tail curled and she bit her lip. Forge could pound me any day she thought, remembering her snuggle time with him the other day. Why was a man that put so much love into holding someone while he slept be so scared of her?....

….Okay, maybe she wasn’t the gentlest when she was trying to court him, some of the stuff she did could have been called rape….. okay it was rape….. But she was a dragoness! Forge should be clamoring for her! She sighed again, wishing that the purple blabber mouth had given her something stronger to drink.

…Well she could always snuggle with Forge some more when he slept, hopefully he would sleep though her fondling him….

Her mood improved she cleared her throat, shutting Twilight up. “Now Ms. Sparkle” She said, leaning back into her chair to get more comfortable, she was probably going to be there for a while. “Let’s get these questions over with….”

Back at the Fort….

Soft Paws shifted in her bed, sighing in content. It was still hours before dawn so she wouldn’t hav-

Wait a second sitting up Soft Paws looked around, nope definitely not her bed. She was in a room of some kind, too dark to properly see her surroundings, and the only light was a candle on the far side of the room.

As she was about to hope of the bed she noticed 2 things.

One, she smelled like she had just taken a bath.

Two, she didn’t know where her cloths were.

Almost yelping she threw the covers back on her, her face flushed. As she frantically looked around for her cloths as the door opened, blinding her with light. As her eyes adjusted she hid further under the covers, not wanting to be seen naked.

What she saw leaning on the doorway, arms crossed and smiling, it kinda looked like that creature that had saved her from those monsters. She shivered at the memory as the creature looked her over.

“Forge” It called “The pup’s awake!”

Soft Paws huffed at being called a pup. She was a grown dog! She was about to give the creature a piece of her mind when the creature that saved her walked in, carrying her cloths.

“Good you’re awake. I’m Forge, I’m sorry about your cloths; you were covered in goblin blood and your clothes were all ripped up. Good for you we had a griffin that knew how to sew.”

She grabbed her clothes off him and put them on under the covers. The other creature snickering, Forge looked at him and frowned. “Go get that report finished Longstrider.”

Longstrider chuckled and tipped his hat and gave Forge a knowing look. “Why big guy? Finally putting that bed to use?” Forge paled and Soft Paws blushed, Longstrider laughing as he walked away. Sighing at his brother’s antics, he sat on the edge of the bed and patted a spot next to him, signaling for her to sit next to him.

Soft Paws looked over at the bigger human. He looked a lot like a diamond dog, he just had smaller paws and his coat looked funny. She was going to thank him again in a second after she asked him an important question.

“Did you bath me?” She demanded, glaring at him.

Forge flinched. “Not me, but I did get some female ponies to. I was pretty sure that you wanted to be cleane-” She wrapped him on another tight hug.

“ThankyouforsavingmefromthosemonstersIdon’tknowwhatIwouldof-” Forge clamped her mouth shut with a hand.

“You are welcome.” He said, gently peeling her off him. “Now we got an eye witness report from that other one you were running with. I’d like to get one from you.”

Nodding Soft Paws started. “Well I was getting water for my pac-” she gasped. “Omygosh those monsters could of attacked my pack! I need to go and see if everydog is okay!” She tried to rise from the bed but was gently pushed down by Forge.

Calmly looking at the worried dog he said, “Calm down first off, second I’ll get some troops to go with us.”

“Us?” Forge looked at her slightly offended.

“I didn’t save you so you’d get cut to pieces if those goblins if they’re still at your cave. I’m coming to.”

Soft Paws sniffled, trying not to cry. No one ever cared this much about her, and she barely knew him. She hugged him tightly again, causing Forge to chuckle, as he patted her on the head. “Alright little one, let’s get you home to your kin.”

The alpha really was having a bad day. If your home was attacked by monsters your day wouldn’t be sunshine and roses. It could have been worse, no dog was hurt, and two of his sons said that they saw most of the hoard chasing Soft Paws and that blue pony. At least she was useful in the end. He thought as he oversaw the removal of the goblins bodies from inside the cave.

One of his cousins ran up to him, panting. “Alpha, others are coming!”

The alpha growled as he started barking orders. “Phalanx! Form the line, form a damn line. We got more company!” His armored dogs formed a line, their shields up and their spears out, the alpha in the front. They waited for the monsters to come back screaming into the mouth of the cave.

What they got disappointed them.

Instead of a hoard of goblins a group of griffins, ponies, one of the princess ponies, and 3 things that looked that like that bastard that orchestrated this raid walked in. The worse part though was who was next to the giant hoo-man, or whatever that bastard called his kind.

Everydog in the phalanx groaned, the alpha right along with them. Damnit Soft Paws, you couldn’t even die right! The alpha bitterly thought as phalanx dispersed, none of the dogs seeing a threat.

The pony princess walked over to the alpha and cleared her throat. “Alpha of the stone paws, I greet you.”

The alpha grunted. “What do you want Celestia?”

“We came to see if your clan was alright and to return the pup Soft Paws to you.” The alpha had to stop himself from groaning again. He had to think of a way to get Soft Paws out of his hair. Dumping her on the ponies seemed like a great idea.

“You take her.” The alpha said, turning around and starting to walk away from her. He heard Soft Paws whimper and something else snarl. He didn’t take two steps when something spun him around. It was the bigger looking hoo-man. Before the alpha could so much as snarl he was hoisted up into the air by the angry looking creature.

“Listen here you flea-bitten mange- ridden gnarly-toothed fuck” Forge snarled. “You are taking this one back or I’m going to skull fuck you; I’ve already had to make friends with the fucking griffins and I’M NOT going to play nice with you!” The alpha flinched, he had about a foot on the human, not to mention he was wearing full armor, but the hoo-man was lifting him up like he was a rag doll.

Looking around he saw that his dogs were moving toward them, starting to pull out their weapons, the griffins doing the same. The alpha racked his brain thinking of how to stop a blood bath.

“She’d be a good worker” he lied. “We sent her up to Canterlot to learn to cook; she’s probably the best cook we have.” That part was the truth, but her cooking wasn’t worth her staying here.

Forge raised an eyebrow and looked at Celestia. “Is this dog telling the truth Tia?”

Celestia nodded. “We did have a diamond dog up at the royal cooking college, I heard that she passed with flying colors.”

Forge dropped the dog and walked over to Soft Paws, who was crying. Gently lifting her chin so she looked up at him he asked, “Is that right Soft Paws?” She couldn’t answer without crying harder so she just nodded yes. Looking over to Celestia who nodded and smiled, he continued, “Well Soft Paws at the moment we are in need of a cook, one that can cook for griffin and pony, can you do that?”

Soft Paws looked up at him, hopeful. Sniffling she answered, “Yes.”

Nodding he looked her up and down. “Then how about it Soft Paws, do you want to stay with us?” She looked up at him and he looked down at her with a smile on his face. Soft Paws was so stunned that she couldn’t speak. Her tears changed from ones of sorrow to ones of joy as she hugged him again.

Picking her up and giving the other dogs the finger, Forge chuckled. “I’ll take that as a yes, and that’s good, I’ve wanted a good stew for 2000 years….”

Later that night…..

What a fucking day The alpha thought as he laid in his bed, the rest of his pack could be heard snoring all around him. At least Soft Paws was gone, and the mutts did get a good skirmish…

The alpha closed his eyes and tried to let sleep take him but something was off. It was almost like something was-

A shadow leapt towards him, driving a sword through the alpha’s stomach before he could get up. He tried to scream but nothing came out. Looking at what had killed him he saw a pair of glowing red eyes.

“Hoo-man…” the alpha said with struggled breath, trying to take the blade out of his stomach, but his arms felt like lead, his strength was leaving him along with his lifeblood.

The human leaned to the alpha’s ear. “This wouldn’t of happened if you would of accepted by deal.”

“Your deal would of made us slaves!” The leader weakly spat, darkness surrounding his vision.

The human sighed, taking the blade out of the alpha as the screams of his packmates could be heard. “Doesn’t matter now, you being nice enough to give me your cave and all” The alpha could almost see the humans smile. “Now be a good dog and die.” The last thing that the alpha heard before the darkness took him was the human’s evil laugh…

A Rude Awaking and Pleasant Dreams

Golden Oaks library…

Twilight stared wide-eyed at the dragoness before her, who was combing her hair at the moment, trying to contain her excitement. Before her was a being that was older than princesses, someone that had years of experience in probably a whole range of interesting and magical things, not to mention her being a dragon, something that almost nopony knew anything about, and she was going to answer her questions!

Needless to say Twilight was having a nerdgasm. Why did she have hair? What were those thing’s on her chest? What was her wingspan? What was the average speed of a European Swallow? Those were just a few of the thousands of questions that Seleis was going to be bombarded with. So Twilight thought she would start the interrogat-er-questioning as soon as possible.

“Okay Mrs. Seleis-“

“Just Seleis Twilight.”

“-Seleis, how old are you?”

Seleis looked sternly at Twilight. “Don’t you know it’s rude to ask a lady her age Mrs. Sparkle?” Twilight gulped and tried to shimmer out an apology, but the dragoness just laughed. “I’m kidding Twilight, I’m 2,500 and not a day over.”

Twilight looked at her amazed. “Shouldn’t you be bigger though?” She blurted out before she could stop herself, making Seleis chuckle again.

Looking over to Spike, Seleis said, “Hey little guy can you go outside for a little bit?” Nodding eagerly Spike got up and trotted outside, leaving a now slightly nervous Twilight and the dragoness alone.

Leaning closer to Twilight Seleis thought over the question carefully. “Well Twilight, I am bigger, about as big as this whole town when I want to be.”

Twilight looked at her confused. “You can change your size?”

“All dragons can when they get old enough. See, we never stop growing so if you get about as old as me then that’s a problem; It would almost be impossible to feed myself without damaging an ecosystem the size of half the planet. So I stay small so I eat less, and keep from destroying towns by accidently not seeing them.”

“Interesting…” Twilight muttered as she wrote everything down. Now it was time to hit two birds with one stone. “How do you know Forge and the others?”

Seleis looked dreamily out the window. “They had to come to the dragon lands for a couple of years to help the war effort. They were staying with me and my father, probably one of the greatest dragon smith’s that’s ever lived.” She sighed. “It was love at first sight.”

Twilight blinked, “Love at first sight? With who?”

“With Forge of course!”

“….But Forge is scared of mares.”

Seleis looked at her dejectedly “I know, next question.” Twilight gulped, she had hit a sore spot and she needed to defuse the situation or her tree was going to become kindling.

“Um… you said that you needed to do something to Spike on his birthday, care to elaborate?”

Seleis got uncomfortably close to Twilight; she was already tired of answering all of these questions for the nosy unicorn, Twilight having to stop herself from running away. Grinning Seleis said, “O I’m just going to help with his growth spurt.”

2:00 am The Fort

Captain SteelWing and Captain ShadowWalker walked toward the smithy, both enjoying Luna’s night. Steel Wing looked over to the bat pony, with his ridiculously curly mustache, and snorted.

“Shadow, you need to cut that thing.” She said gesturing toward his facial hair. The stallion snorted.

“I’m not going to dignify that with an answer. So what do you think about the commander?” She thought over all of the stories she had heard as a cub about the evil humans that would take you if you were bad.

“They might be like the scary stories say they are. He took out 50 of those monsters laughing…”

The stallion nodded in understanding. “I know what you mean, what do you think he wants?”

Steel chuckled. “Probably to say hello.”

Both of the captains chuckled as they heard the sound of a hammer hitting steel. Walking toward the sound they saw Forge putting something back into the forge. Seeing them, he waved them over and turned to shadow.

“… That mustache is ridiculous.” Steel Wing chuckled as Shadow gave him a sour look.

“Captain I’m sure that we’re not here so you can insult me.” Forge grinned and nodded.

“Righto Captain, in about 5 minutes your soldiers are going to get a rude awakening, I just thought you’d like to be spared that.”

“Commander, if I might ask, who’s training my soldiers?” The curious griffin asked.

Forge looked a little sour as he answered. “Since I’m not allowed Reaper and Longstrider will take over training the troops, I’ll just be supervising everything.” Both of the Captains looked at him shocked.

“W-what?” Shadow sputtered. “You’re training 500 with just 3?! That can’t be done!”

Forge looked amused at that. “Captain” he began. “When I was little I always I wanted to fly. Since I didn’t have wings like you two I was told it was impossible. But you know? I always had the mad thought that if I just tried, if I took a step off a ledge and believed hard enough, then I would soar through the air.

And guess what? Years later I flew, one of the many impossible things that I’ve done in the last couple of years; let me tell you, I don’t know how you like flying so much, it fucking sucks.”

“Lesson of the story? Impossible is nothing. Some might say that 3 can’t make the finest soldiers in the world, that it’s impossible… Now tell me Captain-” Pulling the thing out from the forge and putting it into a basin of grape juice, the steel hit the liquid with an angry hiss. Pulling it out and showing it to the two awe-struck captains’ he grinned. “-are you ready to fly?....”

At barrack #1

Reaper looked over at the mass of sleeping guards of all races, swirling his coffee. He closed his eyes, listening to the breathing, wheezing, and snoring that was coming from all around him. Walking to one of the bunks he stood over a pony, a private Cloud Skipper.

Reaper looked down at the guardspony, who was sprawled out on his bunk, dead to the world.

“Dreams little pony” Reaper said “show us more about ourselves than any trial, any quest that we can take in this life. But-” grabbing a bag from the floor and opening said bag, Reaper brought out one of the least common stones in Equestria.

Legendary for its blinding light and thunderous sound when cracked, not to mention that a certain princess can make them, it is simply called a sun stone. Cracking two and throwing them in different directions Reaper grinned.

“-all dreams are fleeing…”

BOOM….. BOOM !

“GETTHEFUCKUPMAGGOTS!UPUP,COMEONWEDON’THAVEALLNIGHT!” He yelled, kicking the guards out of their beds.

The dazed, confused, and tired guards scrambled out of their beds and stood at attention, most of them having ringing ears from the sun stones. Calmly switching the lights on he looked at his platoon, all consisting of griffins, bat ponies, and regular ponies, all of them standing at attention beside their bunks.

To his relief most of their beds were already properly made, at least he wouldn’t have to teach them that…

That almost made him smile, almost.

Keeping his ‘sergeant face’ he walked down each row of bunks. “I am Sergeant Reaper, your Senior Drill Instructor. From now on, you will speak only when spoken to, and the first and last words out of your filthy sewers will be "Sir!" Do you maggots understand that?”

“SIR YES SIR!”

Frowning Reaper stopped and cupped a hand to his ear. “What was that? Sound off like you got a pair!”

“SIR YES SIR!”

“Fillies and colts” Reaper said walking along the lines of soldiers. “If you ladies leave my island, if you survive training ... you will be a weapon, you will be a minister of death, praying for war. But until that day you are pukes! You're the lowest form of life on Earth. You are nothing but unorganized grabasstic pieces of amphibian shit!

Because I am hard, you will not like me. But the more you hate me, the more you will learn. I am hard, but I am fair! There is no racial bigotry here! I do not look down on Horn heads, horse bats, or pigeons. Here you are all equally worthless! And my orders are to weed out all non-hackers who do not pack the gear to serve in my beloved Corps! Do you maggots understand that?”

“SIR YES SIR!”

“Out-fucking-standing!” Looking out for a target to fuck with he came upon a terrified griffin. Walking over to said griffin, who flinched as Reaper got down to his eye level, he grinned.

“Now…”

Gilda stood at attention while her squadmate was being yelled at and called names. Ruffling her feathers angrily she muttered something that would cause her to have the worst day in recorded history. “ Ugly-ass human.”

Reaper shot up, that was what he was waiting for!

“WHO SAID THAT? Who the fuck said that?!” Reaper of course knew who said it, but fucking with the guards was needed, it showed who was in charge and it was the funniest thing in the whole world. Walking over to the mutterer’s general location he continued.

“Who’s the slimy common of shit twinkle toed cocksucker who signed their own death warrant?” None of the troops answered, all of them eyes forward and backs straight. “Nobody huh? The fairy fucking godmother said it? Out-fucking-standing! I will P.T. you all until you fucking die!” All of the guards flinched at this but they remained silent, none wanting to betray their comrade.

Walking past to the offender who stiffened he increased his volume. “I will P.T. you until your assholes are sucking buttermilk!” Grabbing a pony by the scruff of the neck he snarled at the poor mare. “Was it you you scrawny little fuck, huh?”

“SIR NO SIR!”

“You little piece of shit, you look like a fucking worm, I bet it was you!”

“SIR NO SIR!”

Gilda, who was never one to let others take her blame, shouted, “SIR I SAID IT SIR!”

Looking over to her direction Reaper dropped the mare and walked over to the griffin and got to her eye level, Gilda trying not to flinch under his stern gaze. “Well no shit, what do we have here a fucking comedian, Private Joker. I admire your honesty, hell I like you; you can come to my house and fuck my sister.”

Pivoting his hips he hit Gilda in the stomach hard enough to lift her off the ground, knocking her to the ground and leaving her gasping for air. Pointing at her Reaper roared, “I GOT YOUR NAME, I GOT YOUR ASS! YOU WILL NOT CRY, YOU WILL NOT LAUGH, YOU WILL LEARN BY THE NUMBERS! I WILL TEACH YOU, NOW GET UP UP!” As Gilda struggled to get up Reaper hoisted her up face-to-face. “ You’d best unfuck yourself or I will unscrew your head and shit down your neck!”

“SIR YES SIR!” Gilda hoarsely replied as Reaper put her down.

“Private Joker, why did you join my beloved core?” Thinking it over quickly Gilda thought it would be a good idea to tell the truth.

“SIR TO KILL SIR!”

Reaper raised an eyebrow. “So you’re a killer?”

“SIR YES SIR!”

“Let me see your war face.” Gilda blinked confusingly up at him.

“Sir?”

“You got a war face?” Getting in Gilda’s face he screamed. “AHHHHH that’s a war face. Now let me see your war face!”

Gilda puffed out her chest. “AHHHHHH!”

Reaper snorted. “Bullshit, you didn’t convince me, now let me see your war face!”

Unfurling her wings Gilda roared, “AHHHHHH!”

Reaper was still unimpressed. “You don’t scare me, work it.”

“SIR YES SIR!”

Cloud Skipper was as still as a statue, mentally screaming don’tlookatmedon’tlookatmeOsweet- He must of pissed off some god because Reaper walked right over to him. Mentally cursing his fate he steeled himself for his chewing out.

“What’s your excuse?” Reaper asked Cloud, who blinked at the odd question.

“SIR EXCUSE FOR WHAT SIR?”

“I’m asking the fucking questions here private, do you understand?”

Cloud started to sweat. “SIR YES SIR!”

“Well thank you very much; can I be in charge for a while?”

“SIR YES SIR!”

“Are you shook up, are you nervous?”

“SIR YES SIR!”

“Do I make you nervous?”

“Sir...”

“SIR WHAT? WERE YOU ABOUT TO CALL ME AN ASSHOLE?” Cloud started to feel faint but he plowed on.

“SIR NO SIR!”

“How tall are you private?”

“4 foot 2 sir!”

“4’2? I didn’t know they stacked shit that high. You trying you squeeze an inch on me
somewhere huh?”

“SIR NO SIR!”

“Bullshit! It looks to me like the best part of you ran down the crack of your momma’s ass and ended up as a brown stain on the mattress. I think you’ve been cheated.” Reaper turned away and Cloud sighed, his torture was over… that is until Reaper turned back to him.

“Where the hell are you from anyway private?”

“SIR CLOUDSDALE SIR!”

“Holy dogshit, Cloudsdale? Only clouds and queers come from Cloudsdale private cowcolt and you don’t look much like a cloud to me so that kinda narrows it down. Do you suck dicks?”

Cloud’s usually white face turned bright red. “SIR NO SIR!”

“Are you a peter puffer?”

“SIR NO SIR!”

“I’ll bet you’re the kind of guy that would fuck a person in the ass and not even have the goddamn common courtesy to give him a reach-a-round. I’ll be watching you.”

Cloud couldn’t take it. Eyes rolling into the back of his head he swayed side to side and hit the ground, out cold.

Satisfied with his work he decided to get down to business.

“Alright fillies and gentle colts. Get outside; the commander wants to speak with you. Now double time!” When the last soldier ran out Reaper finally let out his long suppressed laughter…

“Fillies and colts” Forge said as he walked back and forth along the lines of the 500 soldiers. “Each of you have the potential to become great, much like the piece of iron you need to be beaten and heated to become a great weapon. We will beat, exhaust, and break you. If you survive that then you will deserve to be called soldiers, you will deserve to be called Thanes. Do you understand?”

All of the guards gulped. “SIR YES SIR!”

As Forge walked along the troops he saw a certain batmare, Nightwing, who waved at him. Captain Shadow facehooved and Forge couldn’t help but smile. Before Shadow could yell at the private Forge raised a hand to silence him and walked over to her.

“NIGHTWING!” He yelled at the mare, who didn’t bat an eye “What is your sole purpose in this army?”

Without missing a beat she replied, “To do whatever you tell me to do Captain!”

There was a moment of silence as Forge regarded NightWing, everyone waiting for her to be chewed out…

“GODDAMIT NIGHTWING! That is the most outstanding answer I’ve ever heard, you must have an IQ of a 160; you’re a goddamn genius NIGHTWING!” As Forge walked past her, everyone, including her captain, looked at the mare who still had a slightly bored look on her face, all of them with their mouths on the floor.

“Alright” Forge continued. “You’re training will be spread out over a 2 month period. These first 2 weeks we’re strengthening you up and giving you the endurance of a Kenyan. Then it’s on to weapons and finally tactical training. You have Sundays off and this week we’re having a poker night so bring your bits. O and if you haven’t noticed there are some civilians here. I expect you to treat them with the same respect as you would an officer. You don’t I skull fuck you, understood?”

“SIR YES SIR!”

“Outstanding! Captain Steel Wing” Forge called to the griffiness. “If you were to guess what is the time?”

“About 3:30 Captain.”

Smiling, Forge said, “3:30? Huh, I let you fillies sleep in… Well you can make it up to me; you will run until the sun sets.” He chuckled at all of the troops shocked looks. “Yes yes, you can thank me later. Now get going, you stop you’re getting an arrow in your ass, is that clear?”

“SIR YES SIR!”

“Good, now get going!”

As they ran Forge waved Longstrider and Reaper over. “Alright, it looks like you scared them pretty good. We wouldn’t even have to chase them!” All 3 of the humans chuckled as Reaper dragged Forge toward town.

“Where are we going?” Forge asked.

“To town.”

“I got armor to make!” Forge whined but Reaper wasn’t having any of that.

“No, we got the troops; you see how the girls are doing.”

“Fine….” Forge said as he slugged toward town…

Trixie had done many things in her life. She was and still is a street performer; she worked on a rock farm for a couple of months. Hell, she was even a stripper in Manehattan for a few months. But being a cook was a first.

“Get those carrots cut Trixie!”

Being a cook that was working under a diamond dog was an even odder job, not that she would call it a job, after the princesses found out she was that Trixie that had a town under siege with an evil alicorn amulet they arrested her. She got off lucky, just community service. But it was what she was doing that bothered her.

She could have been fine cleaning litter, but nooooo she had to help cook for 500 soldiers. Huffing, Trixie threw her knife on the ground, fed up with everything. “The great and powerful Trixie will not be a cook!”

Soft Paws stopped cutting carrots to look up at her. “Trixie” she said, trying to calm the distressed mare. “You have to, you don’t then I’ll have to tell the Captain.”

“The great and powerful Trixie will not be a cook!” Trixie repeated.

Sighing, Soft Paws put her knife down and left the kitchen, returning soon after. “Forge wants to see you, follow me.”

Huffing Trixie followed, getting ready to give the human a piece of her mind, she wasn’t a servant for sun’s sake! Soft Paws lead her past a bunch of exhausted looking ponies to the smithy, Forge working on shovel heads. Throwing a red hot shovel into a basin, Forge grabbed a towel that was close to him and wiped himself off.

Noticing them, Forge waved them over, Trixie steeling herself. “Trixie” Forge began “Soft Paws here told me you are causing a fuss in the kitchens, care to explain?”

“The great and powerful Trixie had been slaving in a hot kitchen all day with the diamond dog, cooking for 500. That is too much for two to handle!”

Forge hummed and nodded. “Fair enough, the troops can help you; they can help cook their own food. If that’s all-“

“No its not!” Trixie snarled. “Trixie is not a cook! She demands that you let her work in this smithy!”

“I already have a store clerk-“

“Not as a store clerk, as a blacksmith!” Forge tried and failed to hold in his laughter, much to Trixie’s bemusement.

Wiping a tear from his eye he tried to let the unicorn down easy. “I’m sorry Trixie but I wouldn’t have pony steel in my shop.”

“And why the hay not?!” Trixie demanded.

Forge rubbed his eyes to fight off his exhaustion thinking over how to best explain why. “Trixie, now you know that ponies don’t have hands to hold a hammer-”

“I can use magic!”

“When a unicorn uses magic to hold a hammer the magic gets into a hammer which in turn gets into whatever you’re forging, ruining the steel. So that’s why-“

“Trixie will show you!” Pushing the human out of the way, Trixie looked around the smithy, grabbing a smaller hammer, a strip of leather, and with a look of determination on her face, Trixie stood next to the anvil.

Wrapping the leather around her hoof she tied the hammer around her hoof. She looked at an amused Forge, who had never seen a pony blacksmith like this before, and said, “Give Trixie some iron!” Grabbing some hot iron from a forge he put in on the anvil, wanting to see what she would do.

Grunting, Trixie balanced herself on her hind legs. “Trixie will now make nails!”

Forge raised an eyebrow. “And you know how to make a nail how?”

“Trixie watched a couple of griffins do it; Trixie goes to a lot of blacksmiths to get wheels fixed. Now be quiet.”

Soft Paws was about to rebuke Trixie when Forge waved her off. “It’s fine Soft Paws, let’s let Trixie do her.”

Looking up at him Soft Paws gasped, Forge had quite a shiner on his left eye. Knocking him over she grabbed his face. “Omygosh Forge! What happened to your face?!” Realizing that she was basically straddling him, she scrambled off him, her face flushed.

Forge chuckled. “Just got smacked by a grandmother, I’m fine.”

“No you’re not fine!” She was about drag him into the kitchen to get a steak on that eye when Reaper walked into the forge.

“Forge” he said “Pinkie needs your help.”

Flipping up into his feet he nodded at Reaper and looked at Soft Paws, who looked like she was going to jump him. “See ya Paws!” before she could protest Forge grabbed Reaper by the scruff of the neck and charged off toward ponyville....

“So what does Pinkie want?” Forge asked as they walked into town, which was oddly empty.

“She needs your help with stuff.”

Forge raised an eyebrow. “ ‘stuff’? Bullshit.” Forge had always been good at sniffing out ambushes and this reeked of one, a party ambush, one of the worst kind of ambushes. If there was one thing that Forge really hated it was surprises.

They both looked at each other until Reaper sighed. “Okay it’s yours and Seleis’s party.” Forge flinched at the dragoness’s name, making Reaper chuckle.

Trying to derail the conversation, Forge said, “Alright Reaper, here’s what you’re going to do…”

Sugarcube Corner

All of the ponies waited in the darkness in anticipation, Pinkie the most excited out of the lot, waiting for Forge to come through the door. Since they were told it isn’t a good idea to surprise a dragon, Seleis had been told about the party and had come early along with Longstrider, who had to hide behind a box so Forge couldn’t see his eyes.

They heard the door started to open, the ponies getting ready to shout with Pinkie manning the lights. The door swung open…

“SURRRR-PRISE?” The ponies shouted in confusion.

There at the door was Reaper, minus a Forge. The ponies looked around, confused as Reaper looked at them impassively. “Sup.” He said as Pinkie was about to have a meltdown…

Vinyl stood behind her DJing equipment confused as all of the other ponies, Seleis and Longstrider just looked around smiling, which was odd to her. What in the hay are the- She thought before a hand came out of nowhere and clamped her mouth shut. Her eyes opened wide in panic and her hooves tried to bat the hand away, the hand was coming out of a bucking shadow!

The closer she looked into the shadow she saw what almost looked like a set of eyes and a smile. The shadow started to become 3-D, Vinyl trying to get away from whatever it was. As it started to take shape,and a voice whispered, “Vinyl, it’s me, calm down.”

Vinyl squinted, that sounded like Forge. “Forge?”

The shadow dissolved, revealing a grinning Forge, who put his finger to his lips.

“Shhhh.”

His Quicksilver flew from his hand, a little bit going into the ears of Forge, Vinyl, Seleis, Reaper, and anypony that was too close to the speakers. The rest formed into a little box. Fiddling with Vinyl’s cables, he hooked the box up to the speakers, quietly turning them all the way up.

“No one surprises Forger Metalworker…” Forge muttered as he pushed a button on the box, starting a song that you wouldn’t want to be surprised by:

[youtube=https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=PqpfGRNVLPM]

In Canterlot…

Celestia got ready for bed after another stressful day as a princess left her wanting nothing more than to just lie beneath her covers and drift off to la la land. After brushing her teeth she walked over to the podium that would hold her crown, chest plate, and horseshoes and put said items on the podium. Using her horn to turn off her lights and lift the covers onto herself, Celestia closed her eyes and let out a sigh of content. This was the best part of th-

“DRAMA”

The princess opened a bloodshot eye in surprise as the bass dropped, angry as all hell. Muttering something about stupid humans, Celestia used her magic to pull a pair of earmuffs out of a drawer and put them on; falling right to sleep.

Back at Sugarcube Corner….

What to Forge, Seleis, Vinyl and the other humans was as a very funny joke, to the ponies that had their eardrums busted and were thrown into the wall from the force of the sound wave, it was a horribly unpleasant experience.

Twilight was one such pony that held this view higher than the others, she was by the wall that most of the other ponies had crashed into, and she had to use all of her magic not to get crushed under a pile of pony flesh. Glaring at Forge who had tears streaming down his face; her horn glowing with the spell that would fix the windows and everypony’s ears.

As the ponies shakily got up they turned toward the blacksmith, most of them looking like they wanted blood. Forge looked at all of the ponies glaring at him and smiled. Walking over to the beverage table and pouring himself a beer he said, “Come on, it was funny and you all know it. Now quite pouting and let’s get some drinking games going!..”

Much later at The Fort….

Seleis poked her head in Forge’s bedroom. None of the humans had drank that much at the party, all of them having to work in the morning. Seleis though, was pretty tipsy. Sober enough to sneak into The Fort undetected, but drunk enough to make some bad decisions.

Longstrider had told her that Forge hadn’t slept for days and Seleis knew a sleep deprived Forge was a Forge that wouldn’t wake up when a certain dragon wanted some alone time with him…

Rolling under the bed Seleis crawled on top of the blacksmith, nuzzling his chin as he wrapped his arms around her subconsciously, both of them sighing contently, Forge because of the contact and Seleis because she was with her beloved.

She closed her eyes and breathed in his scent, her tail curling around his leg as she snuggled closer to him. She couldn’t say how long she stayed that way when Forge’s quiet, peaceful sleep changed. He drew Seleis in a tighter hug and started to whimper, his eyes rolling around his sockets behind his closed eyes as his breathing quickened, muttering in his strange foreign tongue.

Seleis’s heart ached for Forge, she knew about the nightmares that him and the other humans had, if you had seen what they’d seen then you’d stay up days at a time, hoping that you’d be too exhausted to dream. Hugging him back Seleis muttered, “It’s okay Forgey, I’m here.” She kept muttering assurances to him as she waited for him to ride the nightmare out.

After she saw that he was only getting worse she had an idea on how to calm him down. Scooting up so that her head was higher than Forge’s she started planting kisses along his jawline, a deep loving kiss on the lips happening once in a while, all the while stroking his hair with a claw.

Eventually Forge’s whimpering stopped, his eyes stayed still and he loosened his death-grip on the dragoness. Seleis stopped her kissing and wiggled her way back down to her original position, her head resting on his chest.

“What do you dream about big guy?” She asked him. “Do you dream about me?” All she got for her questions was some more muttering, Forge starting to have another nightmare. Seleis racked her brain on how to give him a sweet, dreamless sleep.

What she thought of, while her alcohol drowned brain thought was a great idea, and even while sober she would think it was brilliant, Forge would not be happy about it at all if he was awake. Luckily for Seleis though, Forge was out like a light.

Warning Clop…

Can be skipped over

Starting to trail her claw along his chest again her other claw made the journey farther down south. Pulling his manhood out of his pants she started to gently stroke him. Forge’s muttering started again, but this time it wasn’t in fear.

Seleis gazed hungrily as Forge stiffened, licking her lips. Ignoring his growl as she wiggled downward, pulling his pants all the way down in the process. She stared at it for who knows how long, her muzzle an inch away from his pillar.

She started off simple, a gentle kiss on his tip. She quietly giggled as Forge flinched at the sensation, his breathing becoming sporadic.

Getting on her elbows she ran her serpent tongue down his length before plunging in, taking him into her mouth she started to lightly suck his head as she swirled her tongue around his length. She loved the way that he filled her entire mouth, the taste, the color, and the odd landscape of veins that made up his penis.

She increased her pace, taking more of him into her mouth as she fantasized what this would be like if he was awake and willing. Seleis had the sense that Forge wouldn’t have sex with her; he would make sweet, sweet love to the sex-hungry dragon. That thought alone excited her more than she could say.

Feeling the growing fire in her belly go down to her groin, she opened the wall of scales that covered her sex, which glistened with need. Releasing Forge’s leg her tail went to her slit, rubbing as she quietly moaned, the vibrations making Forge twitch again. Seleis increased her pace, her head bobbing and twisting as her tail was a blur.

Feeling a familiar pressure in her nether regions she took as much of Forge into her as she could as she let out a muffled scream, her sex twitching as her fluids unleashed like a dam bursting as she came.

Twitching, she looked up at Forge, annoyed as she rode out her orgasm. Why did humans last such a freakishly long time? Seleis would have appreciated his longevity if they were having actual sex, but because she was already cramped under the bed and moving him would wake even the heaviest of sleepers, all she could do was suck him off, so his longevity was killing her. She would exhaust herself, just playing with herself and sucking him off. She knew because she had attempted finishing him like this more than once, and every time she tried so would almost pass out before she could.
She slid his length out of her mouth with a wet pop as she panted, her head on his thigh. Thankfully after a lot of practice on him while he slept, she found out what to lick and kiss to finish him quicker.

Shakily getting back to her elbows she looked sternly at a peacefully sleeping Forge she said, “You’re cumming whether you want to or not big guy!” Diving back in, this time also stroking him, she smiled as she slid up and down his length. Finally his breathing was becoming shallow, his member twitching, signaling that his orgasm was near. Seleis bobbed her head faster. Yes Yes! She thought give it to me Forgey! With a final twirl of her tongue around his tip she sent Forge over the edge as he grunted.

Her eyes widened as the first spurts of his cum hit her tongue, Seleis greedily swallowing his seed as he sent load after load into her hungry maw. Swirling her tongue around his length and gently using her mouth squeeze him to get every last drop that he had left. She licked her lips and grinned happily.

“Delicious.”

Pulling his pants back up she sighed in content. Crawling back up to Forge and wrapping her arms around him again, the exhausted, drunk, and absolutely satisfied dragon gave Forge one final kiss, putting a wing over the both of them before sleep overtook her.

Clop over…

The Thanes watched passively as a noose was put around his neck. “Betrayer” Warlock spat, off to the side with the other Thanes, as Forge tightened the rope. “You have betrayed yourself, your family, and everything you stood for. Death is your reward, do you have anything to say before we kill you fucker?”

He grinned at his ex-brothers. “Ya, could you get Empress to-” Forge snarled, hitting him so hard that he flew through the courtyard and into the wall. Struggling back up to his feet he spat out the blood in his mouth and grinned. “O I’m sorry, too soon?....”

Forge’s eyes flew open, his breath ragged. What in the seven hells? He thought as he looked at his hands. They were shaking. Quietly cursing he noticed a dragon’s wing covering him. Feeling something on his chest he flinched, letting out a shaky breath.

He didn’t know when or how she got in his room but for once Forge was thankful for the dragoness’s presence, after that dream he didn’t want to be left alone. Quietly wrapping his arms around her he closed his eyes again, Seleis’s content sigh’s the last thing he heard before he drifted back to sleep….

Author's Note

*author's sitting on a chair with a pair of tapdancing shoes right next to him as he stares meanfully at YOU*

"Alright guys, I'm not going to beg, but-"

*puts on shoes and begins to tap dance as a banner that says 'please like my story' on it*

Taptaptap

"Come on, there's like 500 of you liking this *huff* story. I want to get 300 likes before 30 dislikes *huff* so get on it!"

*the author become faint and passes out from overexertion, his banner falling over him*

Your sword is your best friend...

Pain

Now, CloudSkipper was no stranger to pain, in his three years of being a guard he had broken two ribs, a foreleg and his jaw, not to mention all of the cuts and bruises that he had received while on the job. The pain he was experiencing at the moment though was like nothing he had ever experienced. It was a bone deep, searing pain that could kill a weaker stallion. It was the type of pain that if it was a scary story, you wouldn’t be able to tell it to foals.

That was all Cloud could feel as he slugged into his bed with a groan. He and the others had been run ragged non-stop for a week and a half. Sure the weightlifting wasn’t that bad, but did they have to carry each other 20 miles on their hind legs? Or do push-ups until they couldn’t move? Or be chased by those packs of timber wolves?

Cloud thought not

At least they only got up at 6 in the morning instead of what they had gotten up during normal basic….Too bad he couldn’t move to enjoy it. At least he could get some well-deserved slee-

“Whatcha doing Skippy?”

Or he was going to get harassed by a certain mare. For some reason NightWing didn’t feel the fatigue that most of the others felt, to everyone’s surprise. Her stamina being the result of her fitness, or because it was solely that fact that NightWing was just being NightWing, Cloud couldn’t guess; all he wanted her to do was go away.

“gergnev” Cloud muttered in his pillow, hoping that that would show how much he didn’t want to talk to her.

“COOOOMMMMMEEEEE OOOOONNNNNN SKKKKKKIIIIIPPPPPPPPPPYYYYYY!” NightWing moaned, poking Cloud, each poke sending jolts of pain through his poor body. All of the other recruits looked over to Cloud and Wing, some of them chuckled and some of them looked on angrily, many of them wanted to get some sleep, Gilda was among the latter.

“Shut up you two!” She snarled, too tired to raise her head from her bed.

Wing looked over to the griffin, a small pout on her face. “Why? We have the day off tomorrow. Let’s dooooo something. Come on Gils, let’s talk about something.” The bat mare trotted over to her and sat her rump right down next to Gilda’s bed, making the griffin groan. What made it worse was some of the others were now coming over too.

“Get away from me pony.” She snarled again, weakly swiping a claw at her, the batmare just simply dodged the slow, half-hearted attack. Gilda had a dreading sense that she wasn’t going to left alone until she met Night’s demands… Or killed her, but she was too tired to do that.

“Fine!” Gilda said trying to calm herself, sitting up. “What do you want to talk about?” NightWing looked thoughtful, tapping a hoof to her chin.

“hmmmmm.” She said. “How about the changeling that lives here, she seems nice.” That remark turned the barracks into a hotbed of discussion, much to the dismay of folks that wanted to get some sleep.

“She’s a monster!”

“She tried to take over Canterlot!”

“She hurt the princess!”

“MARSHMALLOWS!”

All of the discussion stopped and everyone looked at the pony who said that, a scrawny stallion that shrank under the group’s gaze.

“Righttttt, let’s get back to the conversation!” NightWing said, bouncing in place. “Sure she’s a little…. Forward…”

“She keeps trying to seduce us!” A random pony yelled, murmers of ponies and even griffins agreeing.

“She is a changeling; she needs love to survive…” NightWing argued. “And look at all of the others that live with Forge! He even has a diamond dog that cooks for us!”

“Sweet Celestia, NightWing” Cloud said, deciding to join the conversation “Call the Captain by his full title!” Looking nervously around he added, “He hears…”

“Damn right he hears.”

All of the ponies/griffins jumped, Forge was right in the middle of all of them, with an amused look on his face. All of them saluted and rushed back to their bunks, terrified, how had the big human done that? Forge looked around, smile still on his face.

“Alright NightWing, Gilda, you two got tonight’s rounds. You, marshmallow guy, have kitchen duty for the next week for being fucking weird. The rest of you get some sleep, you’re lugging stones up Dragon Mountain in the morning!” Forge spun around and walked back to the forge Gilda and NightWing following, Forge smiling at groans that the company were emitting….

In probably one of the oddest sit downs in Equestria’s history, two ponies, a changeling, and a diamond dog were sitting in the mess hall, all of them drinking tea.(insert witty joke here) What might have been odder was that one of the laziest ponies in Ponyville, Vinyl, was actually working on something quite diligently.

Chrissy winked at a group of soldiers that had just come in and looked at what the DJ was writing. “What’s that, Vinyl?” she asked the red-eyed mare.

Vinyl finished her sentence on the paper and looked up, smiling. “This Chrissy” She said, waving it at the queen’s face “Is how I’m going to be able to afford those new Dr. Hay wubs!”

Soft Paws snatched it out of the air and read it over, a blush creeping up her face. “This many mares already paid?” She asked. Chrissy rolled her eyes and used her magic to take the paper out of the diamond dog’s hands. When she read it over she laughed.

“Really? You’re getting mares to pay you to sleep with Forge?” She chuckled as she read down the already long list and saw Octavia’s name. “How much is it?”

“10 bits, I’ve already got payments from most of ‘em.” Octavia would have told Vinyl that it was wrong to do something like this by now, but since she was one of the ponies doing it she wisely kept silent.

The ladies fell into a comfortable silence until another group of soldiers came in. Chrysalis got up and sauntered past them, her tail tickling the chin of one of the guards as she walked into the kitchen and got herself another cup of tea.

As she sat back down she noticed the other girl’s looks. “What?” She asked them.

Octavia cleared her throat. “Why do you do that Chrissy?” the Changeling smiled.

“Just having a little fun with them.” She emphasized that with waving her flank at the flustered guards. The group giggled as Vinyl noticed that somewhere in the conversation that Soft Paws had disappeared. Before she could mention it Soft Paws quietly padded back in, her head down with a red face. In her paws she held a small bag.

Sitting back down and looking everywhere but the mares she handed the bag to Vinyl. “When can I get scheduled in?” She asked, shyly motioning to the paper, gaining a good laugh from the others.

“Alright fillies, now it’s time for weapon’s training.” Forge said, walking down the rows of soldiers. “Take everything you thought you knew about swordsmanship and toss it out the window.”

“SIR YES SIR!”

“Shining Armor, Steel Wing, get your weapons and come over here please.” The stallion and griffin both grabbed their swords and walked over to him as Forge walked over to a rack and grabbed a random sword.

“Let me see your sword Shining.” Giving Forge the sword he looked at his sword in pride. It was the best steel that Canterlot had to offer, it even had enchantments that would-

“The balance is horrible, it’s too big for you, and it burnt to hell. Whoever made this piece of shit should be shot in the balls and banished for his dumbassness.” Forge gave a now shrunken Shining Armor his sword back. Walking over to the griffin he watched as she pulled her sword out of its sheath with a bit of a show and presented it to him.

“Captain, this is a clan sword isn’t it?” Steel Wing’s chest swelled with pride as Forge swung the blade around and tested its balance.

“Yes, the blades name is Wing Ripper; it’s been in my family for over twelve generations.” Forge hummed, looking over the blades waved design. Quietly handing the sword back he looked at the rest of the soldiers and back at Shining.

“Shining, put that sword out please.” Shining was confused at the request but complied anyway. Forge looked at the blade in the stallion’s mouth for about a second, looking like he was looking for something. What is he doing? Shining thought as he stared up at Forge.

He almost didn’t see Forge’s blade as it swung down, slicing his in half. Shining dropped the blade in shock, all of the others wide-eyes as Forge looked over to Steel Wing. “Captain, I’d do the same for your sword but I know how much you griffins love your blades.”

Forge showed all 500 ponies/griffins/bat ponies the sword that he held in his hand, it wasn’t even notched. “A soldier is as only as good as his or her weapon.” He told them. “These swords though, are now everything in your lives. They are your best friend, your mother, and the only thing that you can and will trust. Do you understand?”

“SIR YES SIR!”

“Fan-fucking-tastic! Shining this is you new blade.” Forge flipped the blade in the air and presented it to him hilt first, but before he could grab it the Forge flicked it out of his reach. Getting down to Shining’s eyelevel Forge grinned.

“If you get these masterpieces of smithing you will need to pay me back.” Getting back up he spoke in greater volume. “When each of you get these blades you owe a personal debt, you will become better than me, you will practice until you can’t lift a blade anymore and then you will practice some more. You will become the best swordsmen in the world or you will die trying. Do you get me?!”

“SIR YES SIR!”

“Good now get into a line so we can hand out your swords. Then it’s time to show you the basics!”

“SIR YES SIR!”

Rainbow sat on top of a cloud, bored out of her mind. She didn’t have work that day, all of her friends were too busy for her to hang out with, and for once she couldn’t sleep. She groaned, burying her head in the cloud.

CLANK

Rainbow perked her ears, it sounded like metal hitting metal. Poking her head through the cloud she saw that she had floated over The Fort. Deciding to see what all of the commotion was about she lazily floated down, seeing a huge group of ponies with swords in their mouths.

As she got closer she noticed that each of them was drenched in sweat, all of them looking exhausted.

“Rainbow!”

Rainbow looked around, trying to see who called her name. Her gaze stopped on Reaper, who waved her to come hither.

Before she landed next to him they exchanged a hoofbump. “What’s going on here?” Rainbow asked, motioning toward all of the ponies, and now that she looked carefully, some griffins sprinkled here and there.

Reaper looked around and smiled. “Oh, we’re just strengthening up everypony’s necks and the griffin’s sword arms.”

“By making them hold swords?”

“That’s the best way to do it. The griffins have a hell of a harder time; they gotta keep their swords above their heads.” Rainbow humphed, trotting over to a random pony, who ignored her as he tried to keep the sword from falling out of his mouth.

Reaper smiled as she started to make faces as the poor pony, who was contemplating on spitting out the sword and giving the mare a good headbutt. After a few minutes Dash got bored with that pony and started to fly through the rows to pick out her next victim.

What she found really ruffled her feathers.

“Gilda?!” Rainbow hissed as she handed in front of the griffin, who looked down at the Pegasus and rolled her eyes.

“Hello to you too Dash.”

Rainbow gritted her teeth and cocked her hoof back, intending to give Gilda on hell of a shiner. Before her hoof could connect a hand stopped her. Rainbow looked up angrily at Forge, who was frowning down at her.

“Rainbow, why are you trying to attack Private Joker?” Rainbow sputtered.

“This is-”

“That is Private Gilda Bersavenia, also known as Private Joker to everyone here. Her mother was Isalia Bersavenia, a northern griffin that moved to Equestria when Gilda was still in the womb. She attended flight school with you at Cloudsdale for 3 years; afterward she went back to her homeland to find her way.

She came back 3 years later to see you, and you know what happened next. What you don’t know is that she joined the army, every day she regretted what she did to you and the others.”

Forge looked at the pair’s bewildered looks and snorted. “I like to know where my recruits came from; I had a little talk with your captain Joker. Now Rainbow, apologize to Gilda.” She said, motioning toward Gilda.

“NO! She should be the one saying sorry to me!”

“I’m not going to say sorry to a dweeb like you!” Gilda spat.

“She doesn’t sound very sorry.” Longstrider teetered.

The griffin and pony butted heads as Forge snarled, making them both flinch. “You both got a problem with each other? Fine, you can settle it on the training field.”

“Anytime.” Rainbow and Gilda said, ready to tear into each other. Forge snorted.

“Rainbow, Gilda would tear you apart, she’s had hand-to-hand and weapons training.” Pulling out his sword he stuck it into her mouth. “You want to fight? Fine, you’ll get trained. You have to keep that in your mouth for the next 3 hours.” Before she could protest Forge yelled, “Fillies and colts, Miss Rainbow here has agreed to join you in this exercise. If she drops the blade though you all have to shave her head and beat her until she can’t walk, is that clear?”

He got a lot of muffled Sir yes sir’s as Forge walked back into the smithy, a smug Gilda looking at a pissed off Rainbow. “Got anything to say now dweeb?” She laughed at Dash’s unintelligible words. Smiling, she looked over to the smithy at the human as he showed Trixie how to make shovels. “The Captain isn’t that bad at all.”

Community service is something that Celestia highly encouraged in all of her subjects; it helped the community and made the ponies feel good about themselves. Ask the humans about community service or tell them to do it and you would could get you these and many more forms of fuck you in return,

“Go fuck yourself and your community.”

“Nope, but if you want to do it I wouldn’t stop you.”

“Honkey ha!”

“If your mother was the community I’d serve her.”

"Fuckkkkk you"

Because of these negative attitudes and because most of the townsponies were still leery around the humans, Celestia decided that it would be a good idea that they would help a pony once a week,

Much to the dismay of the humans

So there they all were, helping Rarity take out all of her old sewing equipment and lugging in the even heavier and bulkier stuff; Rarity oversaw everything from the comfort of her own couch.

“A little to the left darling, no, the other left.”

“That’s the right Rarity.” Forge grunted as he carried a sewing machine to the corner of the room as Reaper and Longstrider carried bundles of clothing into the storage room in the back.

Rarity ignored his comment and tried to start a conversation with her future husband. “So Forge, I heard that Rainbow had a little bout with that ghastly griffin Gilda the other day.”

“Ya, I’m making sure they settle out their differences.” He replied, trying to figure out where to put the stupid hunk of junk in his hands; it may have been light to him but it was a pain in the ass to hold.

Rarity’s head popped up from the couch to look at him, her eyes sparkling. “Why that’s very noble of you Forge, if every stallion was like you the world would be a better place.”

“Why thank you Rarity.” Now tell me where to put this fucking thing!

Reaper and Longstrider walked out of the back, Reaper rubbing his hands together, happy that they were almost done. “All done Rarity.” He said to her, the mare smiling.

“Thank you darlings, you are all gentlecolts.”

Longstrider cracked his neck, looking at Forge with a smile. “Having trouble with that buddy?”

Forge grunted. “There’s no place to put it.”

Rarity waved to an open spot by the stairs. “Over there is fine darling.” Forge didn’t comment that it was on the other side of the room that he happened to be at the moment.

“Hey Rarity” Reaper said “I heard that you offered Seleis a job.” Forge flinched as he sat the sewing machine down, his back jerking up in a funny way.

“Goddamnit!” Forge wailed, clutching his lower back. The other two humans chuckled but Rarity looked at Forge horrified. Rolling out from the couch she trotted over to him and helped him sit down.

“O you poor dear!” She said “Injuring yourself for my benefit. How will I live with myself?! The guilt, it’s too much!” she finished with a hoof to her temple, swooning.

Forge rolled his eyes. “I’m fine Rarity, it’s just a sprained back, I just need to stretched out and-“

“Idea~!” Rarity yelled, falling into Forge’s lap. “You can come with me and Fluttershy to the spa tomorrow!”

“I could use some relaxation.” Reaper admitted, Longstrider agreeing with him.

Rarity clapped her hooves together excitedly. “It’s all settled then! And I shan’t take no for an answer Mr. Metalworker!” She said, her eyes hardening as Forge tried to say no.

Forge sighed. “Alright, it’s not like I have a say in matter huh?...”

The next day. Ponyville spa

Reaper, Longstrider, Forge, Rarity, and Fluttershy were all having a very relaxing day. They were resting in mud baths with cucumbers over their eyes. Longstrider sighed.

“This is awesome.” He uttered, sinking deeper into the imported mud.

“It is quite nice.” Fluttershy sighed.

“What do ya think, Forge? Worth the trip?” Longstrider asked, taking off a cucumber and eating it. Forge didn’t respond, Longstrider leaned over and poked him on the arm. “Forgey?”

“zzzzz”

Both of the humans chuckled, Rarity taking off her cucumbers at see what was going on. “Is… he asleep?”

Reaper chuckled. “Ya, we haven’t gotten the best sleep for the last couple of weeks, Forge is the worst though, he’s been making swords for the troops nonstop.”

Fluttershy’s cucumber’s slid off her eyes as she looked at Forge worryingly. “Poor dear, that’s not healthy.”

Longstrider chuckled. “He’s use to it, Forge, Forge!”

Forge shot up, a knife in hand. “What, what?!” The two mares looked at him alarmed, but the humans were only amused.

“You brought a knife with you into a mud bath?” Reaper asked as Forge calmed down. Before he could answer somepony cleared her throat, all of them looking at the source, which was one of the spa ponies, Lotus.

“We are ready to start our massages.” She looked at Forge. “You will be first Mr. Metalworker.”

Forge sighed, getting his towel and passing Reaper the dagger. “Fine

*~/@%~*

After he showered off the ponies put together two tables for his size he walked into the massage room, to the greeting of Lotus and her sister, Aloe. The mares looked him up and down as he laid down.

“You have an impressive amount of scars Mr. Forger.” Aloe remarked, grabbing oils and putting some on his back.

Forge grunted, “They’re all mistakes.” He said.

The two mares looked at each other with eyebrows raised. “Mistakes?” Lotus asked, going on the opposite side of her sister as they started to massage Forge.

“These scars are from me not moving fast enough or my blade didn’t block properly. I remember how I got each of these scars.”

“Really? What about this one?” Aloe asked, tracing a long scar going along his back.

“Diamond dog with a sword.”

“This one?”

“Dragon clawed me.”

As they continued with their game the spa ponies fixed Forge’s back, Forge groaning in pleasure. After a little longer Aloe said, “Alright Mr. Metalworker, could you please lay on your back please?” Spinning around he laid on his face, the spa ponies murmured in discontent.

Forge looked up at the two with a raised eyebrow. “What’s wrong ladies?”

In no way, shape, or form did Forge expect bedroom eyes as an answer. “Well Mr. Forger~” Aloe cooed, Forge becoming pale as she got closer. “My sister and I always like to…. Experiment with our customers.”

“Ya” Lotus added in, tracing a hoof across a panicked Forge’s bare chest, neither of the mares noticing that all of the color had drained from the blacksmith's face. “And you look like a-” Before both of the ponies could blink Forge jumped over them, a towel wrapped around himself, screaming as he smashed through two sets of doors, then the ones for the massage room, and finally the nice new door to the entrance.

Fluttershy, Rarity, Longstrider, and Reaper watched the whole scene in awkward confusion. Longstrider took the other cucumber from his eye and took a bite out of it.

“Humm, he must not of liked it….”

Canterlot…

Celestia poured through another volume, trying to find the last sighting of goblins. From what she remembered about them goblins were easily brought to anger and loved to destroy, there was no way that they would have kept to themselves for so long…

A Sudden flash of realization made Celestia shiver. Walking to her balcony she looked down at Ponyville, fear driving an imaginary dagger through her stomach. Goblins could not keep themselves from their natures of violence…

But someone or something could…

Back at The Fort

Seleis strolled through The Fort (snuck through would be a better term) quietly whistling a tune to herself as she dodged another patrol. Walking into Forge’s cabin like she owned it she thought about what she would be doing to Forge tonight…

Seleis took a deep breath and frowned. What is that smell? That’s not Forge’s scent… She thought as she lifted Forge’s bed to see who else was in the room.

What she saw made her emotions walk the thin line between blinding rage and d’awwww.

For under the bed with Forge was a certain sea-green unicorn. That alone would have made Seleis horribly kill the pony, but the adorableness that she was giving off was almost killing her.

The unicorn was hugging one of Forge’s hands between her hooves like it was her favorite teddy bear. If that wasn’t enough one of Forges hands was in her mouth and the unicorn was gently nomming on it.

The dragoness grimaced, half-heartedly raising a claw to strike down the unicorn but she couldn’t. Sighing she put the bed on the side and leaned down and gave Forge a kiss on the cheek.

“Sweet dreams big guy.” She whispered, walking out of the cabin…

A few days later at Golden oaks library…

Spike walked through Ponyville whistling a tune. It had been a pretty good week, he learned so much about dragons, like he might be able to breathe ice or lightning with his fire! Seleis was pretty tight-lipped when Twilight was around though, something about not telling dragon secrets to a crazy purple pony.

If Spike was honest with himself he really couldn’t argue with her about the whole crazy thing, but what are ya going to do?

Doing a little dance as he approached his home he opened the door to see darkness. What’s going- the lights flipped on, revealing a large group of smiling ponies.

“SURPRISE! HAPPY BIRTHDAY”

After the ponies dislodged Spike from the ceiling the party started, an orgy of cake, ice cream, and games. Everypony partied long into the night, but something didn’t seem right to Spike. For one, Seleis wasn’t anywhere to be seen. The second part was revealed when he was opening presents…

“OOO this one next, this one next!” Pinkie yelled, shoving another gift into the young dragons’ claws.

“Alright Pinkie… could you please back up a little bit so I can open the thing?”

“Oops, sorry..” A sheepish Pinkie said, getting out of his face.

Looking at the tag on the present he saw that it was from Forge, who could not attend along with the other humans. Ripping off the wrapping and opening the box he saw something curious. All that was in the box was a folded up piece of paper and what looked like a mouth guard. Putting the box down he opened up what looked like a letter, all of the attending ponies watching curiously.

Dear Spike,

Sorry we couldn’t come to your party buddy, getting the soldiers into fighting shape. You might be wondering about the mouth guard, well It’s very important. When Seleis gives you your gift put it on, it’ll save your teeth.

Yours,

Forge

P.S.

Reaper didn’t get you anything because he’s a lazy black bastard, if you bust his balls about it he’ll probably give you a dozen cupcakes free from Pinkie.

Spike frowned at the letter well that’s odd he thought as he picked up and looked over the mouth guard. He was a little worried about what the elder dragon had in store for him. Someone poked him out of his musings, a slightly worried Rarity.

“Is everything alright my spikey wikey?”

Spike blushed at his pet name but nodded. “Ya I’m okay… I just got a weird gift from Forge is all.” Rarity just nodded, taking his word for it. The rest of the night proceeded without a hitch, until all of the ponies had left, leaving just Spike and Twilight, who for some reason was looking nervously at the door.

Spike turned toward his caretaker. “Twilight, what are you-” The door flew open, revealing a grinning Seleis.

Walking over to Spike she gave him a little noggie. “Happy birthday little guy!” Spike blushed from the on slot, trying to get out of her grasp. Dropping the young dragon Seleis asked, “Are you ready for your present?”

Spike was about to nod when he remembered Forge’s gift. “Hold on a second!” Racing to over where the mouth guard was he put it on. “All right, I’m ready!”

Seleis chuckled at the dragon’s eagerness. At least he has that mouth guard she thought as she grabbed his tail before he could do anything it’ll save him from breaking all his teeth. Picking the now confused and slightly scared Spike she looked at the spikes along his back and tail, counting them out.

“Alright, it should be… this one!” Grabbing the third spike from his tail she pulled, Spike screaming as it came out with a pop. The last thing the young dragon remembered before passing out was a fire-like sensation that spread all through his body.

Seleis smiled brightly at a worried Twilight, who was watching the whole scene passively. “Alright! Do you have all of the food I told you to get?”

“Yes”

“And there’s a bed in the basement for him?”

“Yes” Twilight took Spike’s limp form from Seleis and lightly nuzzled him. “Is he going to be alright?”

Seleis chuckled. “He’ll be right as rain in 3 days, maybe 4. He just needs to stay in a dark room to let the metamorphosis do its job.” Seleis watched as Twilight took the dragon downstairs.

“His crazed lust might be a bit of a problem though…”

Forge walked angrily over to him as he slowly got up, noose in hand. “Get up you little fucker.” He snarled as he got about 20 feet away from him. Before Forge could take another step he charged right up to the blacksmith, getting a hand to the throat and a knife to the eye for his trouble.

“Make my fucking day betrayer.” Forge said, his eyes and voice lacking any emotion but hate.

He laughed, looking up at Forge, who snorted in disgust and picked him up by the scruff of the neck and carried him back to the rest of the Thanes. Before Forge could put the noose on though, the betrayer had an odd request.

“Forge” He said seriously “Say my name, one last time for old time’s sake.” Forge looked him up and down, putting the noose on almost delicately.

“IronHeart, shut the fuck up and get ready for hell.”

IronHeart smiled. “Yes big brother.”

Dragon problems and the feels

Spike woke up from his slumber in pain.

Now the young dragon had never run a marathon before but he expected this is what it feels like afterward. His arms and legs felt like they were on fire, and his lungs and abs each tried to win his attention by trying to outhurt each other.

“Oh sweet Celestia….” He murmured, putting a claw to his throbbing head. As his claw touched his throbbing head he noticed two things.

One, that his claw was way too big for his body.

Two, he was really hungry.

Opening an eye he looked at his now massive claw, it was bigger than his body, or so he thought. He looked down his arm to the rest of him, now all seven feet of his new body. What do you think the teenage dragon thought?

“Sweet! Now I don’t need to use the ladder to put away the books on the top shelves!”

Spike doesn’t really get out that much…

His gaze swept over his new body, admiring the somewhat lanky frame, his now long tail, arms, and most importantly, the pair of small wings that had grown from his back. So focused on the task of admiring his new body Spike momentarily forgot about his hunger; that is until his stomach growled angrily at him, demanding that something be put in it.

“Grrrrr….” Spike’s stomach almost roared, making the dragon flinch.

“Boy am I hungry.” The drake muttered as he looked around at his surroundings. For some reason he was in the basement on one of the spare beds that Twilight always kept around in case she had a sleepover with her friends. What really got his attention though, was the massive pile of food waiting on a table a few feet away from him.

Said table had everything that a young dragon could ask for, rubies, sapphires, emeralds, and for some reason, iron bars. Spike stuck his tongue out at the iron, those tasted awful, but the second the gems scent hit his nose his soreness was forgotten.

With no self-control whatsoever, he jumped over to that table and ate like a starved man(or dragon, or... Fuck it), barely tasting the food. What might have been a hundred pounds of gems and iron was gone in less than ten minutes as Spike sprawled out on the ground, letting out content sighs as he rubbed his swollen belly.

“Boy was that goo-” Another smell caught his attention, cutting off his mutterings. Spike had no idea what it was but it was making him hungry, and not the kind you could eat away. Now with stunning clarity he remembered every toned flank that he had ever seen, coupled with the looks of mares as they walked past him.

Getting up Spike bleatingly realized, as his eyes turned red, that the feeling he was feeling was lust.

One way or another, someone was going to get fucked today...

Hard.

Rainbow and Gilda stood on either side of the training yard blades in mouth/claw, ready for battle. Forge stood in the middle of the soon to be battleground and the trainees crowded about the outskirts to try to get a good look, taking bets on who was going to kick whose flank. Those two weeks of weapons training had had been harder than any training that Rainbow had ever done for the Wonderbolts, a fact that Gilda would whole-heartidly agree with.

If Rainbow wasn’t such a bitch

“Alright ladies!” Forge yelled at the two “You get your chance to beat the shit outta each other now. After this is over no more of your bullshit understand?” Both of them nodded. “You know the rules, there are no rules, now FIGHT!” He yelled, throwing both hands down and getting the hell out of the way.

The griffin and pony both curbed their instincts to charge, slowly circling each other, trying to find weakness in the others defense. Gilda started the deadly dance first, flicking her tail in Rainbow’s face. As Dash flinched the griffin swung her sword savagely at the ponies head,intending on braining the mare. Rainbow rolled under the slash just in time and past Gilda’s guard, her sword hitting her opponents leg as she went past.

As Dash got to her hooves she couldn’t help but smile as she heard Gilda’s squawk of pain.

Gilda shook herself, angry that Dash got the first hit, shaking out the knot of pain that was now in her back leg. It’s the last time she’s getting a hit. she thought as she charged the Pegasus hard, trying to hit her with a barrage of slashed, cuts, and stabs, her anger increasing as Dash either blocked or got out of the way of her furious attack, only one or two strikes getting past the ponies defense.

What the griffin couldn’t see in her rage though, was that Dash was calmly thinking on how to beat her foe, who was stronger than her, had more mass to push her around, and a longer reach. It was when she rolled out of the way of a downward stab when she had an idea, one that she admittedly should of thought of sooner. I need to get to the air!

There was no way she could beat Gilda on the ground right now, but in the air she was superior. Taking two giant hops back Dash spread her wings out and with a mighty flap, launched into the air.

Gilda growled. “Oh no you don’t!” She bellowed, taking off after her with an eagles cry.

Dash couldn’t help but smile again as she climbed upward, the angry griffin following her. Up and up the two went, until the air was starting to thin out and to the others watching from the ground they were dots in the sky.

Dash was fine with the lack of oxygen, being a weather Pegasus and all, but Gilda was weezing. Seeing her chance the cyan Pegasus folded her wings, letting gravity turning her into a dive bomb headed straight toward Gilda.

As Gilda looked up at the Rainbow colored blur, she knew that there was no way to avoid it, she was tired, she wasn’t getting enough air, but she wasn’t a griffin to give up. With another cry, but this one of defiance, She swung her sword upward as Dash swung downward.

Even from almost a thousand feet up Forge and Longstrider could hear their cries of pain, along with the rest of the recruits, most of who flinched.

Longstrider snorted as the two flew downward without any sign of stopping. “I told those two about being careful with fighting in the air” he told his brother “It’s controlled attacks or nothing. You better help them out Forgey.”

The blacksmith just snorted and lifted a hand, the two becoming encased in a blue glow, slowing the two down until they were about ten feet up, when Forge dropped them roughly to the ground roughly. The recruits watching flinched as they almost heard the air leaving the two with an onffff!

Gilda and Dash ignored the pain, both shakily getting to their claws and hooves, picking up the swords that they had dropped in the fall.

Dash grunted as Gilda chuckled evilly, lazily circling the injured cyan Pegasus, trying not to show that she probably wouldn’t be able to fly too. “What’s wrong Dash? Your little pony friends make you soft?”

Dash snarled, stopping herself from charging the griffin, wanting her to attack first. “At least my friends aren’t bullies like your flank is; seriously Gilda how couldn't I see you for what you were during flight school?”

That did it, her eyes turning red from rage Gilda charged Dash, swinging her blade hard at the Pegasus, Dash meeting it with her own blade, the blades sparking. Soon they started a dance of slashes, parries, and dancing around each other, both trying to find flesh to hit.

“What I was, WHAT I WAS?!” Gilda roared as she started the using her greater mass to push Dash around. “I was the only fucking griffin in flight school!” she was getting so worked up she couldn’t feel the blows that Dash was landing. “I was the freak! And YOU were my only friend!” By now Dash was starting to get angry, standing her ground and meeting the griffin blow for blow as Gilda continued.

“And after I go to see her after all of those years she treats me like another freak, leaving me ALL ALONE AGAIN!!!” With a finale mighty slash of their blades their scarred blades finally broke. As they both looked at their broken swords Dash took advantage and bucked Gilda in the stomach, sending her through the air and into the ground.

“You bullied my friends and terrorized the entire town for fun!” Rainbow growled, dodging a claw strike.

The fight now changing into hand-to-hand combat Gilda had the distinct advantage, with her reach, weight, and strength she slowly beat back Dash. Soon both of them started to falter, their blows starting to slow and become sloppy as they got tired. Dash, having the greater stamina of the two, just let the griffin tire herself out and make a mistake.

It came when Gilda tried to wing cuff her. Rolling to the side, Dash tackled the tired griffin to the ground and stood over her, both of them breathing heavily, both exhausted and covered in sweat.

“Just tell me why Gilda, why did you do all of those bucking terrible things?!” Dash demanded, what she got was something she would never expect from the griffin, tears.

“I lost you Dash” Gilda said, crying her eyes out “I-I knew I lost my best friend when I saw you and I just l-lost it.”

Dash started at Gilda, who was now crying her eyes out, dumbfounded at what was happening.

“M-my best friend h-had six new b-best friends and I-I was alone aga-” Gilda stopped her shaky explanation and broke down crying, not caring that she looked weak or girly, she was sick and tired of being strong dammit!

Dash watched her ex-friend crying like a filly. I-I didn’t abandon her! She was being a jerk! she tried to reason with herself. For some reason though, she couldn’t help but feel that she did abandon her. Next to Fluttershy, Gilda was one of the most made fun of at flight school, Dash being her only friend. And I kicked her to the curb....

Gilda was interrupted from her emotional breakdown when she felt someone lift her up and place her in a hug. Looking down she saw who was hugging her, a now crying Dash.

“O-O Gilda” Dash said “You were one of my best friends, getting some new friends couldn’t chance that.” She wrapped her up in a tighter hug. “I couldn’t see you were hurting a-and I kick you to the curb. What kind of friend am I-I?”

As the two reconciled, Steel Wing looked over at Forge, who watched the whole thing impassively. “You knew.” She said, saying it as a fact.

Forge nodded. “It was just a big misunderstanding, all they needed to do was beat it out of each other and they’d be friends again; happened to me and my brothers all of the time.”

The captain nodded as Forge motioned at the two nurse ponies standing by to help the injured pair, who both were sporting a wide array of cuts, bruises, and a couple broken bones.

“FORGEEEEEY!” Forge flinched as the griffin next to him chuckled.

“The dragon’s not that bad Forge.” Steel said as Forge looked for an escape route.

“Yes she’s fucking- SWEET FIVE POUND SIX OUNCE BABY JESUS!” Seleis giggled as she held Forge a few feet in the air as she kept flying, Forge trying to get away; all of the trainee’s chuckled at their captains’ misfortune, this wasn’t the first time this had happened and it probably wasn’t going to be the last.

After getting out of her grasp, Forge demanded, “What the fuck do you want Seleis?!” Seleis suddenly turned serious, landing on the ground.

“Spike’s awake.”

The 3 human’s groaned at that. “Just let me get my armor on and we’ll go and tire him out.” Forge sighed. “At least you didn’t go at him the traditional dragon way.”

Seleis nodded, grinning “You should have seen Twilight when I offered to do it! She got so red!”

Forge looked at a confused Steel Wing. “When dragons hit their first growth spurt they… want to fuck everything they see. The usual dragon tradition is to get an older dragoness to…. Tire him out.”

The griffin nodded as Longstrider groaned. “It’s the easier fucking way too, Sparkle should have just let Seleis pop the fucking dragon’s cherry! Now we gotta go get our asses beaten by a hyped up Spike!...”

Ponyville

“Ponyville doesn’t look that bad.” Reaper commented as the humans arrived in town, as he said this part of a damaged house collapsed into itself with a loud crash. Longstrider looked at the destroyed town and the ponies running everywhere, what really caught his attention though was what looked to be the town’s water tower on fire.

“Ya not that bad.”

Forge took off his helmet and sighed. “Alright, let’s just get this over with. Reaper you go left, Longstrider go right, I’ll take the middle. Holler if you find-” Forge would have finished if a thrown cart hadn’t nailed him, sending into a building, but it did so we’ll never know what he was going to say.

Longstrider and Reaper looked at each other and then at the thrower, who was standing in the middle of the street, Spike. Not one to miss irony, Reaper called to Forge, “Forge we found Spike.”

Forge walked out of the ruined building, dusting himself off. “Real fucking funny.” Forge muttered as they watched Spike spew flames at a house.

“Guys wait!” The humans looked around at the yeller; it was Twilight along with Applejack and Rarity, all of them running toward the humans.

Forge wiped the rest of the rubble from his helmet as the girls stopped right in front of them. “Twilight” He said “Are the trainees helping get ponies safely away?”

Twilight nodded. “Ya, we were just rescuing the last of them. Spike’s lost his mind.”

Forge chuckled as he watched Spike eye them hungrily from across the street. If he was to guess Spike wasn’t eying him, at least he hoped he wasn’t. “He’s just experiencing dragon maturity; you know it would have been easier if you’d of just let Seleis have her way with him.”

Twilight sputtered, turning red. “Spike isn’t old enough to do that!”

Longstrider chuckled. “Well, now Seleis wouldn’t help us at all. So here’s what we can do Twilight. One, we can beat on Spike until he passes out.” He chuckled at the girl’s horrified expressions. “Or we can run him to the ground. What will it be-“

Spike, in his lust-induced frenzy, make the decision for them. With a roar he charged the group, his ‘spear’ out for impaling. Longstrider watched Spike in appreciation. “He got a lot bigger.”

Forge nodded calmly. “Ya, a bit skinny though and his wings will need a couple more years to fully develop for flight.”

Twilight looked at the two. “You’re discussing what he looks like now?! He’s trying to rape us!”

“Rape you” Forge pointed out. “Don’t worry though, Reaper’s got this.” The girls looked around, Reaper was gone. By now Spike was about halfway from the group, the dragon so focused that he didn’t notice Reaper behind him. Picking the young dragon up by the scruff of the neck and throwing him through a building, the said building falling on the dragon with a loud crash.

“SPIKE!” Twilight yelled, trying to run over to her assistant, Forge stopping her.

“He’s fine Twilight; dragons are pretty durable SOB’s.”

Reaper took a step toward the house, his fist raised, ready to give Spike what for again.

“AHHHHHH!” An ear-splitting roar resonated from the house, causing everyone to cover their ears.

“You pissed him off!” Longstrider yelled. Forge snorted and started to take off his armor.

“This is going to fucking suck.” He muttered “Reaper watch out for his fire! Keep him busy for a minute.” Nodding, Reaper watched as Spike exploded from the house, intending to rip the human apart. Reaper dodged the first swipe and batted away another, dancing around the dragon with a flurry of jabs striking the Spike from all sides, Spike not even noticing any of them as he kept up his assault of the Thane

The girls watched in fascination as Applejack looked over to Forge, who was now just wearing chainmail and his gauntlets. Slamming both of the gauntlets together with a loud clank the started toward the dragon.

“Forge” Aj said. “Ya’ll go easy on the little guy, ya hear?”

Forge stopped and smiled at the farmer. “Don’t worry Applejack-” They both watched as Reaper flew right past them. “-besides, Spike should go easy on me.” Glumly walking over to the dragon Forge first tried to reason with the dragon.

“Spike, I know you’re in there buddy, you just need to.”

SMACK!

Forge staggered from Spike’s punch to the jaw, almost losing his footing. Spike was about hit him again but Forge’s arm shot out, catching the blow. Popping his jaw back in place Forge looked at the dragon with a disapproving glare.

“Now that wasn’t-” Spinning around Spike smacked Forge with his tail, sending him back to house that he had first gone through. Rarity looked in the building.

“Forge, are you okay dear?” she called. All she got was a growl as Forge angrily walked out of the building.

“I’m going to fuck that little-” he saw Twilight looking at him. “-I mean… *sigh* fuck it.”

Charging the dragon Forge’s fist caught Spike right in the jaw, knocking him right off his feet and through the air.

The dragon was back in his feet in an instant, trading blows with the blacksmith.

By now Reaper had recovered and was standing next to Longstrider, both of them protecting the three girls and watching the fight. “Forge is doing pretty good.”

They watched as Spike bit down on Forge’s arm. “Ow you little fucker!”

“Ya, he’s doing real good, you think we should help him?” They watched as Forge kicked Spike right where his balls would be, sending the dragon into the air and on the ground with a groan. Both of the humans and the three ponies flinched.

“Na.”

Forge spat a bit of blood from his mouth and did the ‘come at me’ double hand wave as Spike found his feet. “Come on you little scaly little dickhead.”

Spike growled, his wings flaring as his chest puffed out, Forge’s eyes widening. “O shit.”

Spike unleashed a wall of flame engulfing him.

“Forge!” The girls yelled, the humans rolling their eyes.

“Forge really just fights like an overweight boxer, he refuses to move around.”

Reaper snorted. “Yup.”

When it looked like Forge was burned to ash Spike was about to close his mouth when a hand snapped it shut. The fire cut out revealing Forge with his eyebrows on fire and his eyes blazing. Spinning the surprised dragon around Forge put him in a sleeper hold, the dragon trying to claw

Forge’s arms off but luckily for Forge the gauntlets held.

“Shhh shhh shhh there you go” Forge said as Spike’s struggles weakened. “go to sleep, go to sleep you little cunt.” The dragon slumped in Forge’s arms, out like a light, Forge gently putting him down as everyone ran over to see how the dragon was.

Twilight rushed over to Spike and checked to see that he was still alive, to her relief he saw the gentle rising and falling of his chest. “O Spike…” she said as she brought him in a tight hug as the other girls circled around him. A few feet away Reaper and Longstrider walked over to Forge, who was panting on the ground.

Reaper looked him over; almost laughing when he saw Forge snuff out the flames on his eyebrows.

“You alright there Forgey? You look kinda beat up.”

Forge just nodded his head and tried to stand up but fell right back down shaking his head like a dog. “The little guy can really throw a punch.”

“Do you need help you big guy?” Longstrider asked as Forge tried, and failed, to get up again.

The blacksmith sighed, “Just carry my ass back to Fort and tell the girls to get Spike; the nurses should still be there….”

“Alright Miss Dash” Nurse Redheart said as she finished wrapping the last bandage around Rainbow’s head. “That should be… it. Now you need to rest for a few days along with Miss Gilda over there.” Both of them groaned as the nurse started to put her kit away in a saddle bag.

As she turned to leave Forge and the others walked in the makeshift hospice (Forge and Spike were carried but you know what I mean) The nurse gasped. “O my! What happened to you two?!”

Forge looked over at Rainbow and Gilda and sighed, mumbling something. “What was that?” The nurse asked.

“Spike kicked my ass”

“Could you say it louder please?”

Forge grunted. “Spike over there kicked my ass. You happy nurse, you cynical bitch”

Even though she was in a lot of pain that would make laughing a bad idea, Rainbow could feel

laughter start at her belly and move upward. She tried to stop the laughter, it coming up in giggles, Gilda giggling along with her.

But soon it exploded into full blown laughter, the both of them crying from the pain but they couldn’t stop. Their laughter was contagious, and soon everyone was losing it. Forge wiped a tear from his eye.

“I really hope those ribs hurt Dash….”

A Few Hours Later….

After getting fussed over by his roommates and laughed at by two of them. Forge tried to get some shuteye at the now dubbed ‘ward’. He considered himself pretty lucky, a few bites, bruises, a slight concussion, and burnt off eyebrows was a pretty lax group of injuries when fighting a dragon.

Unfortunately for him the nurse had insisted that he stay in the bed for the rest of the day and the next, something that he was going to ignore but right now he was too lazy to leave his bed; besides, he needed to watch Spike to see if he was going to wake up and lose it again.

He smiled as he looked over at Spike, Twilight sitting in a chair, her quiet snoring being drowned out by whatever the hell Rainbow was doing .

“Captain.” A voice called.

Forge sighed. “Yes Gilda?” he said, closing his eyes.

“Could you come over here?”

Sighing to himself, he opened his eyes and got out of the bed, groaning. I’m going to feel this in the morning. He thought as he limped over at the griffin, who was staring anxiously at him. Standing over her he looked the griffin over, she and Rainbow had taken quite the beating today, a broken wing for the both of them, extensive bruising, among other things.

“What’s wrong private? Are your injuries bothering you?” I should probably hire a nurse or something for the fort. He thought as he waited for Gilda to give an answer. We’re probably going to be our asses beat a lot more. Hmmm… I should probably hire more and on-

He was interrupted as the griffin sat up and wrapped the surprised human in a hug. “Private?” A confused Forge said, looking down at the griffin, who was looking up at him with tear in her eyes.

“Thank you for helping me get my best friend back Captain.” She said as she buried her face in

Forge’s chest, quietly sobbing. Smiling, Forge hugged her back.

“No thank you’s necessary Gilda.” Forge said, looking over to Rainbow, who was oddly not snoring anymore, in fact if he looked at the Pegasus carefully he could have sworn that her eyes were slightly open.

“Just don’t mess it up this time huh?” He chuckled as the griffin nodded like a puppy that wanted to make its master happy. “If nothing else then I’m getting some shut ey-“

“Oooo Forgey~”

Forge scrambled over to his bed and picked it up, intending to use it like a bat or shield. Standing at the doorway was Seleis, wearing a nurse’s outfit. How she got an outfit made so quickly was beyond him, or how she kept getting past his patrols, but he was sure how she was going to leave.

By him asking her politely to leave.

……

What? Did you think he was going to attack a dragon that was stronger and faster than him?

The dragoness grinned at him, bandages in claw. “Alright big boy, it’s time to get those bandages changed” she took a step toward him and he took a step back in terror. “But I personally think that a physical is in order first~….”

A Few days later…

After her wounds healed Gilda was able to return to duty, much to her pleasure. What made her unhappy though, was that her fellow soldiers wouldn’t stop talking about how sweet it was that she became reunited with her friend and all of that nonsense. There was one pony that wouldn’t leave her alone about it though.

“Come on Gil’s! Tell me how you looked into Rainbow’s eyes, said I love you, and kissed!”

Gilda looked up at NightWing, wanting to beat her pony skull in for the tenth time that day.

“Pony” she said slowly, like she was talking to a five year old “I’ll say this one more time because I can tell that you’re a little slow. Rainbow and I are just friends; there was no kissing, no looking into each other’s eyes or any of the bull, okay?”

The bat pony looked thoughtfully at her, humming like she was trying to solve a complicated math problem.

“… I don’t believe you.”

Gilda hit her head against her bed, groaning, ready to get back up and put the bat pony into the ward. Thankfully for the both of them, NightWing because she wasn’t going to get her flank kicked, and Gilda because she wouldn’t be going to jail for beating a pony within an inch of her life, Cloud walked over to them.

“Hey guys” He said as looked over to the general direction of the smithy. “I think the Captains are up to something.”

Gilda looked over to him with curiosity along with NightWing. “What makes you think that Cloud?” Gilda asked. Cloud looked around to see that no one else was watching them.

He motioned for them to lean closer to him and whispered, “They’ve been in the smithy all day, and didn’t you notice that we didn’t do any training today?”

NightWing just shrugged, oblivious to the foreshadowing. “You’re thinking into this too much Skippy” She said, patting him on the head and trotting over to her bunk to get some shuteye “We have been working pretty hard lately, maybe they thought it would be a good idea to give us a break.”

Cloud was not really convinced but nodded anyway, going over to his bed and closing his eyes, hoping that he would be still in this bed in the morning….

Hours Later…

Cloud was gently awakened by birds chirping all around him; soon one of the humans would yell them all to get up and to go get breakfast. He was really feeling pancakes that morn-

His eyes shot open, not only was he not in his bed, but he wasn’t even at the fort. His vision was filled by trees and the hint of uneasiness meant that he was in only one place, Everfree. Obuckobuckokuck Cloud thought as he looked around in a panic, his brain going into overdrive on how he had gotten there.

This must be what the Captains were meeting for! But why would they send us out-

“zzzzzzzz-”

Cloud froze at he heard snoring, thinking that he was near a sleeping pack of timber wolves, after all that was what it sounded like. Wait, I know that snoring! Trotting around he spied what he was looking for, NightWing curled in a ball and snoring loud enough to wake the dead, Gilda not five feet away from her, her snorting not much quieter.

“Girls, wake up” He pleaded, looking around to see if anything was stalking them. Neither of the girls moved.

“GIRLS!”

Both of the girls jumped up, obviously startled. “How, what, why?” They both said at the same time.

If their lives weren’t in danger then Cloud would have probably laughed.

Bracing himself he looked at the both of them and said, “Now girls, I need you to stay calm as I tell you this. We are in the middle of the Everfree forest with nothing to-“

Night shushed him, trotting over to a stump grabbing something and bringing it back to the small group, it was a note of some kind. Snatching it from her and opening it, Gilda read aloud,

“Dear recruit, today is the first day of your final training. As you might of already guessed you are in the middle of the Everfree forest, somewhere between fifty and a hundred miles away from Canterlot, which you will have to go to for the next phase of your training.

This is a simple test; survive without food, water, and protection while you are in the most dangerous place in the world. Navigate the incredibly disorienting deathtrap of a forest and the deadly animals, it shouldn’t be too hard…

Gilda squinted as the writing changed.

Survive ponies, survive!

You guys are royally fucked.

“Grrrrr…” All three of them flinched, slowly turning around and getting a good look at the particularly large pack of timber wolves that were staring hungrily at the three of them. They all looked at each other and NightWing said what might have been the smartest thing that she had ever come out of her mouth

“RUN!!!!”….

IronHeart smiled as a bag was placed over his head, the noose going on next. “Come on boys” he said “I don’t have all day.”

Warlock responded by tightening the rope and grabbing the lever that would make the floor fall underneath the tainted thane, hopefully breaking his neck, instead of the slow strangling that he kinda deserved.

As Warlock was about to pull the lever a silent watcher of the whole incident chuckled evilly, a glass of chocolate milk in his claw as he lazed on a cloud. Snapping his fingers he watched as the lever was pulled and a sharp cracking sound could be heard.

“Well, that was fun. Watching the thanes ‘kill’ one of their own.” Discord giggled, disappearing with another snap of his fingers…

Everfree Expedition

“Is the widdle puppy hungry? Who’s a cutesy wutesy? You are, yes you are!”

Gilda rolled her eyes as she clung to a tree branch, timber wolves all around them. “Bat pony” She said, faceclawing “Stop baby talking the wolves for ancestor’s sake!”

Night looked over to her from her branch, chuckling at Cloud who was holding desperately to his branch. Unfortunately for the three, the wooden wolves were not deterred when Night growled threateningly at them, and they chased the group no less than ten miles before Cloud had the genius idea to climb a tree.

Trying to fly in the dense jungle was impossible and the attempts were hilarious and painful to behold but that is a different story for a different time.

“But they’re so cute!” The batmare said as she cooed at the wolves, each taking turns trying to jump high enough to knock her out of the tree. “I could just eat them up!”

Cloud would have rolled his eyes if he wasn’t a three inch jumping distance of getting bit in the ass. “G-gilda, try s-scaring t-tt-them away.” He yelped as a wolf got particularly close.

Nodding the griffin sucked in as much air as she could, and then released one of the loudest eagle cries that either pony had ever heard; in fact if he wasn’t using both hooves to hold on for dear life, Cloud would have jammed them into his ears.

As impressive as the display was, all that Gilda got was a bemused glance from the timber wolves, most of which had given up trying to get at Night and Gilda and instead were trying to jump up at the white Pegasus, who if he was of sound mind would have just lifted himself a little more onto the next branch and to safety.

If either of Cloud’s team members were concerned about his well-being they hid it very well, ignoring him as they threw ideas back and forth on how to get out of this mess.

“We could try to make a fire, Timber wolves hate fire right? We could just wack a couple of the suckers with a flaming stick.”

“We don’t have anything to start a fire with.”

“Good point, maybe we could-”

“SWEET CELESTIA IT”S GOING TO BUCKING EAT ME!!!!!!”

“Cloud would you please be quiet, we’re trying to think out a way to get the wooden mutts to leave us alone. Jeeze, talk about no manners.”

Before they could continue, the two ladies saw a bright light coming toward them. Gilda squinted at the ball of light. “What is that?”

Night almost fell out of her tree trying to get a better look. “I don’t know, one of those willow thingies?”

“You mean will-o-wisp?”

“Gesundheit.”

Gilda rolled her eyes as the light got brighter. Some of the wolves were now smelling the air, some of them whimpering in fear, and some in anger. Gilda’s straining ears picked up the faint clinking of hooves hitting the ground.

“Is that a pony?” She asked as the light almost got within range of being able to see what the ball of light was. The traces of a unicorn could be seen as his or her’s shadow danced as the flame was near it flickered.

It must be another one of the soldiers Gilda thought as the unicorn got closer I wonder why they’re all alone? The closer they got the more they could see of what was now clearly a male, his broad shoulders and bigger height a clear sign of his gender.

“Over here mystery pony, over here! WOOOO HOOO! ” Night yelled, waving her hooves around in the unnecessary attempt to get the pony to assist them.

“Begone foul demons!” The mystery pony yelled, his voice deep and filled with power. Stamping a hoof into the ground his horn glowed, his fire by his side becoming far bigger and floating over to the now panicked timber wolves, who yelped in terror and pain when the fire hit them, the burning wolves rapidly fleeing the scene.

The fire died down and the three got a good look at the stallion, who was none other than Shining Armor.

Finally free to get go of the tree branch Cloud fell into a rather painful thorn bush, but he didn’t care, he was alive! Crawling over to Shining Cloud started to kiss his hooves in gratitude.

“Thankyouthankyouthankyou!” Cloud said between kisses as Gilda and Night rolled their eyes and flew down toward the ex-captain.

“How’s it going Cappy? Say, Could you get a fire started? I’m freezing my flank off here.” Shining looked at her and chuckled, using his magic to grab firewood; with a simple fire spell the group was warm and toasty.

As the now group of four got ready for the night Cloud looked over at his captain. “Sir” He said “Weren’t you in a group like we were when you woke up?”

Shining’s chest puffed out in pride. “No I was alone; Forge must think I’m strong enough to survive the forest alone.” What the Captain didn’t know was that he was solely in a group of one because there was no one else to put with him and Forge didn’t want a group of 4.

“I was heading to Canterlot and saw you three were in trouble so I thought I’d lend a hand. By the way Cloud, you don’t have to call me sir; I’m not a Captain anymore.” Shining said, hanging his head in shame.

NightWing looked at him and chuckled. “You’re still a Captain, silly.” She said. The others looked at her strangely.

“What are you talking about Night?” Gilda said. “I heard that that big human fired him.”

Night just chuckled again. “Forge is the same rank as you silly, I’m pretty sure the only one that can fire you is one of the princesses… or a general, do we even have general’s?”

Her question was ignored by the three, Gilda tried not to laugh at Shining’s stupidity while the captain tried to wrap his head around what he had heard, Cloud was thinking about the humans, ignoring his Captains mistake.

“Speaking of Captain Forge” Cloud said “What do you think he’s going to make us do after we we get to Canterlot?”

Night snorted this time. “He’s not even going to be in Canterlot.” Again all of the attention was on her.

Gilda faceclawed (I don’t fucking know...) “And you know this how?...”

Night looked sheepishly at her. “You remember when we were on patrol duty and I said I was going to the bathroom?”

Gilda gave her a sour look. “Ya, you didn’t come back for two hours.”

Night nodded vigorously “Ya! Anyway when I got out of the bathroom I heard Longstrider and Reaper talking so I kinda….. overheard their conversation.”

“You were spying on them?”

“No, I overheard the conversation.”

“Without them knowing?”

“Yep”

“That’s spying!”

Cloud shook his head at the arguing ladies and looked over to his captain, who looked like he was broken, his eye twitching and his mane wild. Cautiously he leaned over and poked Shining.

“Captain?” He said, his voice uncertain. “Are you alright?”

His eye twitching dangerously, Shining said, “Yep, never better! I’ve just found out that I’m Captain after I told my whole family that I was demoted. I’m just dandy Hahahaha! I’m going to sleep now!” With that Shining laid down and left Cloud mildly scared for his safety.

Turning back to the girls he saw that they still hadn’t finished their argument. Rubbing his temples Cloud decided to stop the argument. “Night, since you overheard what they said did they we get to Canterlot?”

Night stopped yelling at Gilda and pondered the question. “Hmmm. They really didn’t get into specifics, but there was something about chasing the Sergeant for some reason.” Shrugging the mare yawned. “Well I’m pooped, good night everypony!” Just like Shining as soon as her head hit the ground she was quietly snoring, leaving Cloud and Gilda awake.

Gilda sighed. “I’ll take the first watch; I’ll wake you up in a few hours.”

Nodding, Cloud tried to find a comfortable position as he quietly drifted off to dreamland. After she heard his quiet snore, Gilda looked up at the star-filled night sky, wishing on every one that some of her fellow griffin soldiers would find her so she could leave the crazy three behind.

I’m not that lucky Gilda thought as she watched Night roll over in her sleep, getting close enough to Cloud so that she could wrap her hooves around him. Gilda quietly chuckled as they both let out sighs of content at finding something to keep them warm.

If Gilda was honest with herself she was growing rather fond of Night and Cloud, they were the craziness that she needed in her life… Not that she would ever tell them that. Looking back up at the sky she sighed for the thousandth time that night.

“I wonder how Tomorrow is going to go down. It really couldn’t get worse, right?”

Easily, if the author has anything to say about it….

As Celestia’s sun crept over the horizon, its rays broke through Everfree’s thick canopy, CloudSkipper began to wake up. To his surprise he didn’t wake up cold and sore, he was nice and warm, like someone had thrown a heavy blanket over him.

As he finally opened his eyes it took his sleepy brain a few seconds to comprehend the multitude of things that he was seeing.

One: He actually was in the Everfree forest; he hadn’t dreamed it all up.

Two: That heavy warm blanket was actually a sleeping Manticore.

Needless to say if he wasn’t so scared the moment that his brain recognized that he was trapped under a four ton monster he would have shit his pants.

…if he wore pants.

Frantically looking around he saw that the others were perfectly alright, each of them curled up fast asleep. If Cloud wasn’t in the position that he was at the moment then he would have made a joke about ruining someone’s morning.

“Shining! Captain!” He hissed as the Manticore shifted around to find a better position, almost engulfing the poor private. Thankfully for him his Captain was beginning to stir, eventually giving a great yawn and sitting up, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes.

“Alright everypony” The Captain said, a bit too loud for Cloud’s taste “Time to get up and move out!” The other two started up stir as Shining looked over to where Cloud was.

“Private, I need you to-” He stopped when he saw a terror-stricken underneath a monster. Both of the stallions looked at each other for a good minute, neither blinking.

It was Cloud who broke the silence.

“H-help m-me.” He whispered as the Manticore growled in its sleep, wrapping its paws around the Pegasus.

10 minutes later…

“It’s a she and she’s in heat.” Gilda whispered as she looked over the animal. “She must want a good rut from you Cloud.” NightWing was over to the side with Shining, trying, and failing, to suppress her giggles.

“See Cloud!” The bat mare said “I knew that you’d find a special somepony.” If Cloud wasn’t so scared at the moment he would have thought of a clever retort..

“Captain can’t you just lift this thing off me?” cloud begged, almost crying when Shining shook his head.

“Can’t, it weighs too much, we just need to get it to move on its own without waking it up.”

“And just how are we going to do that?” Gilda asked as the Manticore nuzzled cloud and gave him a lick, coating him in saliva.

The three free ponies/griffin pondered what they could do to free their fellow soldier. Surprisingly Night was the one to come up with an idea.

“I got it!” She quietly yelled as she trotted over to Gilda “Gilda I need one of your feathers.” Without waiting for an answer, she ripped out a feather and trotted over to Cloud as Gilda hissed in pain and surprise. Getting face-to-face with the Manticore she looked over it, a thoughtful expression on her face.

A look of realization on Gilda’s face as the bat mare took the feather in her mouth and started to tickle the beast’s nose. At first nothing happened, but after a minute the Manticore’s nose started to twitch. Not long after that one of its paws lashed out, trying to bat away its tickling tormentor. Luckily for Night it swung high or she would have lost her head.

Now cautious, Night kept it up, dodging the monsters random swipes as it started to rock back and forth. Finally, to everyone’s relief, the Manticore rolled off Cloud to get away from the tickling, freeing him.

“Thank Celestia that that’s over.” Cloud happily said, ruffling his feathers as he cracked his neck.

Shining gave a sigh of relief and smiled. “Good work NightWing, now come on everypony, let’s get to Canterlot.” Nodding, the other started walking in the capital’s general direction when tragedy struck. As he took a careless step Cloud snapped a twig, that twig making probably the loudest sounds that the party had ever heard.

SNAP!

The Manticore shifted in its sleep, everyone froze as it sat up and yawned, providing a good look at its enormous teeth. Looking around the Manticore (whose name is actually Saquifa) saw that her soon-to-be fuck buddy was no longer in her grasp.

She also saw that there were some tasty critters around, so looks like she’s getting a dinner and a ‘show’. All she had to do was catch them.

The ponies watched as the manticore got into a crouching position, a deep growl leaving its throat. Looking at each other Gilda gulped and shakily said, “Aw buck…”

45 minutes later…

Luckily for the group, Canterlot was almost within reach. Now all they had to do was get rid of the giant Manticore.

“Just buck her already Cloud! Sacrifice yourself for the good of the squad!”

“Buck you NightWing!”

“No not me! Her!”

As they reached a clearing Shining stopped and spun around, his horn glowing. “Enough running! We make our stand here!”

“Ya!” Gilda said, flaring her wings and letting out a cry, the Manticore stopping and watched the new situation unfold. The pegasi looked at each other and nodded, heartened by their fellows bravery as they flared their wings too at the amused lioness.

Saquifa almost yawned as she watched her prey and fuck buddy practically giving up. She knew that she was a lot bigger and stronger than those ones with wings but she had to watch the one with the horn, those ponies were dangerous.

As the lioness thought over her strategy the squad attacked, Shining sent a blast at her as Gilda charged toward the behemoth and Cloud and Night tried to flank her. If she could Saquifa would have rolled her eyes. With a simple sidestep the spell missed and the griffin smacked into her; for Gilda it was like hitting a brick wall as she staggered to move her far heavier opponent at all.

With a simple flick of her paw the griffin was thrown through the air into Shining, dazing both of them as they laid in the dirt. Before either Night or Cloud could even touch her Saquifa took to the air with a single flap of her mighty wings, inertia made the pegasi unable to get out of each other’s way and they collided.

Landing back into the ground the lioness looked over her handy work, all of her foes on the ground and ready to be dealt with. But as she lifted a paw to walk over to claim her prizes she and the fallen squad heard something wiz through the air. Not a second later the ponies and griffins heard the lioness roar in pain as an arrow pierced through her paw.

“Go back into the woods kitty if you know what’s good for you.” They heard a voice calmly say, the speaker none other than Longstrider, who was a good 30 feet away with another arrow already notched and pointed at the Manticore.

“Strider it’s good to see you!” Cloud happily said as he finally untangled himself from Night.

Longstrider smirked. “You’re the last group to show up, but you didn’t bring out the biggest surprise; Reaper’s still dealing with a hydra that another group pissed off. Now back to you puss and boots.” He said, turning toward the lion, “As much as I’d love to shoot you the ponies up in Canterlot wouldn’t let me cook you in their capital so I’d rather not, so just get moseying back into the forest.”

The Manticore used her mouth to take out the arrow whimpering at her bad luck. The lioness was not a stupid animal, she knew a suicide mission when she saw one. So it was with deep regret that she started back into the forest, giving one last passing glance a Cloud’s flank before disappearing in the brush.

The squad let out the breaths they did not know that they were holding as Longstrider put away his bow. Clasping his hands together and grinning at the group, Longstrider said, “Well, now that the fun’s over, let’s trot up to the ol’ capital city.”

Night stretched with a smile in her face, bones popping in her back. “I can’t wait to get back to the barracks to get some shuteye.” The others murmured in agreement as the human stopped and turned to then, an evil grin plastered on his face.

“Who says you’re getting any sleep? This is the last leg of your training, Forgey wouldn’t be happy if Reaper and I went easy on you.”

“What is the Captain doing anyway that he couldn’t be up here himself?” Gilda asked as they made it through Canterlot’s main gate.

****

Forge and Vinyl were in a heated staring contest, Forge trying to break the mare with his gaze. They and the other girls were locked in a heated battle of sorts that had lasted from morning long into the evening, until the only ones that had any chance of winning were the blacksmith and the DJ.

Forge had to admit that Vinyl was a worthy opponent in this preverbal war, she had tricked him more than once and it was only by a lot of skill and luck that he wasn’t overwhelmed. Looking deep into the pits of the white mares soul he said, “Vinyl, do you have any sixes?”

Vinyl looked at the cards assembled in her hooves, seeing that she had in fact 3 sixes. Almost breaking her poker face she said, in a voice so monotone that it would impress the Grim Reaper, “Go fish.”

****

“Longstrider looked down at the griffin, shrugging. “I couldn’t tell ya, probably some important Captain stuff….”

And so, over the course of a week the Thanes-in-training went without sleep as they were shown how to excel in urban warfare, how to clear and breach a room with the proficiency of a Navy SEAL, how to pick the criminal out of a crowd during rush hour, and how to properly patrol and protect a city and the citizens that inhabited it.

.

An then they fought a great many battles, earning fame and glo- Opps sorry….Too much Conan...

Now back to the story…

Today was an already odd day for the trainees. For one they were allowed to get about 4 hours of sleep, something that they all did gratefully. Now they were standing at attention in Canterlot castle’s courtyard waiting to be inspected by the princess, Longstrider, Reaper, and the two Captains.

“Atten-tion!” Someone yelled.

The trainees stiffening as the princesses came into view followed by the humans, the griffin, and bat pony. Celestia looked at all of them as they saluted as one, a small smile on her muzzle. Even after the merger time they had gotten to sleep and clean themselves they were still a mess.

The luckiest only had bags under their eyes and a smell similar to rotten garbage; others were cut up pretty badly with ugly bruises that didn’t look more than a few hours old. The most heartwarming thing about the mangy, tired, and beat up group was the fire that they all had in their eyes, it show that their hardships didn’t break them but made them stronger.

The boys did a good job Celestia thought with a giggle as she stood before the guards, waiting for Longstrider to debrief them about their final test.

The human in question stood in front of them group and cleared his throat. “You all have survived everything that we have thrown at you, with every test you have risen to the challenge and became better for it; you all have just one test to complete before you join our brotherhood.” Longstrider snatched the crowns off both Luna’s and Celestia’s heads and tossed them to Reaper, who with a grin dashed out of sight.

Longstrider chuckled at the groups shocked and bewildered expressions. “In three days the Griffin Empress will be arriving here for an official visit with the princesses. This would be all well and good but unfortunately someone stole our royal highnesses crowns and if they aren’t found before the Empress gets here then a national incident might occur.

You all have until three o’clock three days from now to capture the perpetrator and return both of the crowns before all hell breaks loose. Your respective Captains will be leading you, do not fail.”

“SIR YES SIR!”

Longstrider looked up at the sun, trying to judge the time. “Your time starts…. now.”

As chaos erupted by way of troops scrambling around and orders being shouted and ponies running around Longstrider left the courtyard with Luna and Celestia, all three happy at how everything had turned out.

Longstrider turned toward Celestia. “Tia” he said, “Did you get anything from Forge? He has to be busy down there in Ponyville.”

*****

“You drive a hard bargain mister. How about this, if you buy one sofa I’ll throw in a second one for fifty percent off!”

Forges eye twitched. It wasn’t the fact that he was in a shop that only sold quills and sofas that was getting him upset, though he did wonder how the stallion the owned the place stayed in business, much less thrived.

Sure it did cross his mind that the owner, DavenPort, should have had a shop that sold quills and maybe art supplies or sofa and sofa accessories, that’s what any logical business owner would have done. But hey, the stallion was actually succeeding, so more power to the guy.

No, the reason he was ready to throw the stallion out the window was that he had just came to pick a few quills for Chrissy and DavenPort thought it was a good idea to try to sell him a sofa.

Apparently he had never met Forge.

“Look, pony” Forge said, leaning over the counter to get face-to-face with the stallion. “All I want are five goddamn quills; if you try talking me into buying a sofa one more minute I’m going to shove one up your ass. Savvy?”

DavenPort frowned; he was losing a customer, thinking fast he brought out the big guns. With blinding speed the stallion grabbed Forge and led him over to a sofa, a vein bulging on Forge’s forehead.

With as much flourish as he could muster, the stallion said, “You leave me no choice my friend, I can see that you’re a… person of fine taste! This is my finest sofa, made with Arabian silk and lined with Pegasus feathers; it even comes in Minotaur sizes! For you… five hundred bits and I’ll throw a coffee table for free!”

Forger looked down at the smiling stallion, eye twitching dangerously. Leaning down to get eye level he said with a sigh, “What colors does it come in?”

****

Reaper ducked through another alley as Pegasi and griffins flew overhead, trying to spot him and failing horribly. This was the last day for the guards to catch him, so their searches were becoming more frantic.

They weren’t doing a bad job though, for one thing they figured out early that using a sun stone messes up his shadow magic, something that Reaper also didn’t know, the learning experience almost knocked him through a window five stories up. It was also a pain in the ass when they started to ask citizens if they had seen a 6’6 black guy running around.

But thanks to the tight alleys and a labyrinth of back streets and places to hide Reaper had successfully evaded capture. For now anyways.

“There he is!”

The Thane smiled as he panted, tired from today’s chases “and there is the five O.”

Climbing the fire escape and sorta-kinda breaking into a ponies house Reaper watched as no less than thirty guards fly into the alley that he once occupied .

“Where did he go?”

“I just saw him a second ago.”

Reaper pressed himself against a wall as a griffin peered through his window. After a few tense seconds the griffin shrugged and flew away. “It looks like it was nothing.”

The human quietly chuckled to himself. “That was a lot easier-” He frowned; something or someone was poking him on the back. Fucccccck He thought as he turned around, seeing the room was filled with to the brim with bat ponies, with Shadow Walker leading the pack and looking smugly at him, curling a mustache with a hoof.

Reaper gulped. “There are griffins waiting outside for me aren’t there?”

The Captain grinned, showing his fangs. “Yep.”

“And you just wouldn’t let a guy go with a warning right?”

“Nope”

Reaper slumped against the wall, trying to figure out how to get the hell out of this. “Well fuck, I think you guys got me this time.”

Shadow and the other bat ponies brightened hearing that. “Really?”

Now it was time for Reaper to grin. “Nope, you ponies have been talking to a shadow the whole time.” The ponies groaned as the Reaper-lookalike dissipated, they all watched as the real Reaper exited the building and took off down the street.

“After HIM!” Shadow roared as he rubbed his temples from his beginnings of a migraine. At least its daylight, hopefully he can’t do that when the sun’s beating down on him Shadow looked up at a clock in the room and sighed, they only had an hour before the Empress came, he needed to catch that bucking human….

“What are you doing in my house?!” A voice demanded as Shadow turned around and saw a very upset looking mare, who had a frying pan in hoof.

“Wait, I can explain-“

CLANG!

****

Reaper jumped a cart as ponies panicked at the monster and the guards chased him. Gottagetawaygottagetaway he thought as he frantically looked for a way out. All he needed was to prolong this for another hour and then he’d be done.

Dodging a guard that flew at him he kept an eye out for traps. There’s the bat ponies, Pegasi, and griffins, where the fuck’s the earth ponies and unicorns? Reaper thought as he ran into the market square, the group hot on his heels. Unlike the other ponies that had seen him these ponies were looking calmly at him, almost as if they were-

“O shit!” Reaper exclaimed as the trap was sprung, the undercover guards charging him. He tried to escape but he was swarmed on all sides and taken down, lead cuffs placed on him so he couldn’t do anything funny. Steel Wing landed in from of him, throwing him to the ground and patting him down.

Reaper grinned. “At least buy me dinner first.”

Steel ignored him as she continued to look for the crowns. “Where the buck are they….” She squawked in joy as she found the crowns, ripping through his clothing with a flick of her claw as Reaper complained to get to them.

Steel threw Shadow the princess’s items. “Get these to the princesses; we’ve only got thirty minutes left!” Shadow nodded and took off as Reaper was hauled to his feet.

“Fuck the police!” Reaper yelled, replicating a COPS arrest. “You white, racists motherfuckers! I’ll sick the NAACP on you asses you saltine pale skinned- ummmf!”

“Thank you Private Sunshine”, Steel said as Reaper gagged, “I never thought he would shut up.”

****

“Why do I have to be here again Tia?” A grumpy Forge asked as him, Longstrider, and the princesses waited for the griffin empress to come.

Celestia rolled her eyes. “Empress Isbalia wanted to see the prince’s of Equestria.”

“You know that I fucking hate being showed off like some zoo animal.”

Longstrider wrapped an arm around his brother. “Cheer up Forgey” He said to the disgruntled blacksmith “This Isbalia might be a cutie; lord knows that you need to start dating.”

WHAM!

Luna giggled as Longstrider rubbed his arm as Forge looked at his watch; the guards only had about one minute left. Looks like they failed he thought disappointedly well I guess-

“We got it!” someone yelled.

The royal group looked around and saw Shadow barrel down toward them, the crowns in his mouth. He was just in time too; a fancy looking carriage was looming over the horizon. As he landed in front of them Shadow collapsed, clearly exhausted.

“Good job Shadow!” Forge said as he picked up the crowns from the group and wiped the pony spit off of them and putting them on his sister’s heads. “When you recover tell everyone to head back to The Fort.”

Shadow nodded tiredly as the carriage landed. Forge picked up the exhausted stallion and brought him to eye level, “Do you trust me Shadow?”

“What are you-“

As the carriage door opened Forge threw Shadow through an open window, where the bat pony miraculously landed in a bed. Both of the princesses rolled their eyes as Forge shared a look with Longstrider. “Bet you ten bits he landed on something soft.”

The two paused as they heard a feminine yell and then the sound of a pan hitting something hard.

Longstrider looked him over for a second and then nodded. “Deal”

When the carriage fully opened the two humans saw maybe one of the fattest griffins either had even seen walk out, along with a much slimmer and younger looking griffin. Both of the human’s mouths were agape with shock.

“Is that a fucking griffin?”

“Na it can’t be, it must be the other ones pet hippo.”

Celestia’s tail hit both humans on the back of the head. “Shut it!” She hissed “And we’re having a talk about throwing ponies through windows Forge.”

“He couldn’t be seen or it would have looked weird.”

“He could have just flown away!”

“He did fly away! just not under his own power!”

Before the argument could escalate the giant griffin finally waddled over. “Celestia!” The griffin said, wrapping Tia into a crushing hug, lifting the princess off the ground.

Forge looked at Luna confusingly. “Is she getting attacked?”

Luna shook her head no. “No it’s how griffins great each other.”

“I don’t like it.”

“Nopony likes it.”

Dropping Celestia the empress grabbed Luna and did the same for her, the humans backing off from the giant griffin. To his horror Isbalia looked at him. “O you!” She said, her claws outstretched as Forge backed away.

“Nonono” Forge said, trying to get away, but before he could take a step he was grabbed and thrust into the griffin’s feathery bosom.

“Yesyesyes!” Isbalia answered with a slight giggle. “You must be one of those humans!”

“therfeve!” Forge said through the wall of feathers and flesh that was trying to choke him.

“Well nice to meet you sweetie, I’m empress Isbalia of the griffin kingdom.” She dropped a gasping Forge and pointed to the other griffin. “This is my daughter, Teledia.” The griffin looked him over and smiled, offering Forge a claw.

“Charmed Mr. Forger.”

Forge looked over at the now hugged Longstrider. “It’s nice to meet you princess; you’re ma’s really… huggy.”

Teledia giggled. “Mother can be quite a clawful.”

After releasing the now gasping for air Longstrider, the empress stood in front of Forge. “How have my soldier’s been honey?” She said, gently hip-checking Forge, almost knocking him over. “Did you make them super soldier’s like Tia said you would?”

Forge nodded. “Yes ma’am, they’re the best we can make them, in fact they just passed their final test.”

“Good, good!” She looked over at the frazzled Celestia. “Come on Celestia, you can show me and my honey to your rooms. It was nice meeting you boys!”

As she left Luna, Forge, and Longstrider watched as she left, the silence was imminent.

Forge was the one to break it. “Well she was terrifying.” Longstrider nodded as Luna chuckled.

“She really is a handful, we’ll bring her to inspect in a day or two, you guys can leave.” She hugged them both. “Goodbye brothers.”

As the humans left Luna steeled herself to deal with the griffin’s empress, who from this distance could be heard demanding some donuts…

****

The Fort

“You’ve all passed” Forge said to the soldiers, all whom were flush with success. “Tomorrow you’ll get equipped and assigned to whatever you’ll be doing. Just remember fillies and colts” Forge saluted them, a small smile on his face. “It’s been my honor beating the shit out of you lot.” The troops roared in approval as the other humans and Pinkie came in with barrels of alcohol.

“Let’s party!” NightWing shouted as the ponies charged the booze, all of them intent of having a very good time…

****

Carousel Boutique

Rarity tried to finish her latest order as fast as she could to get to that party for all of the soldiers. Maybe I can get Mr. Forge to ask me for a dance she thought with a giggle, adjusting her red rimmed glasses.

“Annnnnd done!” She happily exclaimed, using her magic to carefully put the dress away. “Now it’s time to-” Rarity heard her door being opened. “Hello?”

She was given no answer as she heard somepony, or now that she listened that it wasn’t hoofsteps but footsteps, someone was coming up the stairs. Rarity sighed in relief; it must have been one of the humans coming to escort her to the party. She giggled quietly to herself, trotting to the top of the stairs, her eyes closed as she hummed happily.

“O darling, you didn’-”

She stopped as someone wrapped a hand around her throat and slammed her against the wall. Her eyes shot open when she saw a human that she had never seen before, one with unnerving red eyes.

The human grinned as she struggled in vain to get away and get some sweet, sweet air. Before she blacked out from oxygen deprivation, the human leaned in and whispered in her ear.

“So you’re Generosity?” He cackled in an emotionless voice. “Not much to look at…. Tell me sweetie, do you fear death?”……

Author's Note

New Pre-reader, yay! DracoWrath

Good job with the editing and keep up the good work!

You make us stronger.......

Heh....

heh...

Meeting the IronHeart

Rarity woke to darkness. Oh! she thought, her wits still slow from sleep what a horrible nightmare! She couldn’t of been kidnapped by some strange human! That didn’t make any sense in the waking world!

She tried to raise a hoof to turn on her light that was on her nightstand when she noticed some unpleasant things.

One: she couldn’t move her hoof at all; further investigation showed that she couldn’t move her whole body at all.

Two: She wasn’t in her bed either.

The white mare started to hyperventilate in panic, trying to thrash around, attempting to break free.

“HELP!” She yelled at the top of her lungs, hoping against hope that this was just some sick joke and her friends would pop out any second and release her. But for all her screaming and begging she got nothing but the pitch black darkness that surrounded her.

Eventually becoming too hoarse to yell, she just laid there, waiting for someone or something to come to her.

And hopefully that being was a friendly chap that would free her.

So the alabaster played one of her least favorite games, the waiting game, for what seemed like hours she tried to keep herself from becoming a shimmering panicked mess when she saw a light coming toward her. The mare had to contain herself from screaming at the light, afraid that it would leave if she was too loud.

The light didn’t leave though, it became bigger and soon Rarity heard footsteps. She steeled herself, she wasn’t going to show this ruffian any fear! She was going to be a lady and face her kidnapper with grace and charm!

After giving herself a little pep talk she noticed that the light had stopped moving toward her. Rarity flinched as a voice cut through the darkness.

“Well well well, it looks like our little prisoner’s wake.”

The light whizzed past her and there was the sound of glass breaking, followed by a blinding light that forced Rarity to close her eyes.

“You ruffian!” Rarity scolded, trying to get use to the light. “I demand that you release me at once!”

Someone chuckled evilly at her. “I’m sorry, I can’t do that Miss…”

“My name will not be given to such a brute as yourself.” Rarity said as her eyes began to get used to the light. She still couldn’t see her captor but it was only a matter of time.

She heard chuckling again. “That is wise of you milady, names are dangerous things… and I am more of a monster than a brute if you would humor my input.”

If she wasn’t tied by and held against her will Rarity would have complemented the voice on being so well spoken… him, and she could tell by the tone of the voice it was a male, calling himself a monster with almost amusement in his voice was just disquieting for the mare.

The voice continued. “I suppose you’re wondering why I took you from your home, and if I mean you any harm while you are in my… tender care.”

She was about to retort when her vision finally settled, and anything she was about to say was replaced with pure terror. All around her were hooks, knives, and cleavers, most of them covered in blood and gore.

But the worst thing was her captor. He was the same red-eyed human that had knocked her out, but with the light she could see him clearly. He was about Longstrider’s height but with a slim frame. He was wearing a leather apron, which also had dried blood and gore on it.

Looking up toward his face her terror increased. He had a predator’s face, with fangs longer than Forge’s or the others, and a pair of cruel looking eyes that held little emotion.

Ironheart saw the terror on her face and smiled. “Now my lady” he cooed. “There is nothing to be scared of, those restraints are for your own safety, my followers aren’t the gentle sort and we wouldn’t want that pretty face ruined.”

He stood before her and bowed. “I am Ironheart, the fallen thane, kin killer, and all around bad man. It is nice to meet you my lady.” When he looked up to see the mare still shivering he sighed. “You know ma’am, it is rude not to introduce yourself.” He sharply told her.

Rarity gulped, trying and failing to keep the fear out of her voice. “I-I’m R-Rarity.”

Ironheart hummed, walking over to a table and picking up a knife he walked over to Rarity, whose eyes widened with fear.

“Well it is an honor meeting you Miss Rarity.” He politely said, running the tip of the knife along her belly, not enough to pierce the skin but enough to feel it. “I’m sure you’ve met my ex-brothers?”

Rarity, who was crying at this point, nodded.

“Well, to answer your earlier thought Miss Rarity; I need your help to kill my brothers. I know what you’re thinking, why would I need a wonderful mare like yourself to do this horrible thing?” He gave her a toothy smile, seeing that her Quicksilver was beeping red, the Thanes would be here soon.

“Well darling, you are, in simple terms, bait.”…

The Fort…

Forge woke like he did whenever he went to a party, under a pile of bottles and with a hangover. “O shit, my head.” Forge muttered, looking around at all of the passed out ponies all around. Squinting in search of a half empty bottle he noticed that Longstrider was right next to him.

“Longstrider, wake up.” Forge said nudging his passed out brother.

“Mumfff, nooooo.” Longstrider muttered, trying to get away from the poking. After a minute it went away, before he felt a bottle being broken over his head.

“GODDAMIT!” Longstrider shouted, looking around for the perpetrator to beat down. All he saw was a bemused looking Forge.

“Time to get up” The blacksmith told him “we partied a little too hard last night.”

Longstrider sighed and snatched the bottle from his brother, taking a big swig. “We party hard every time.”

“Longstrider, do you think we’re alcoholics?”

Longstrider looked at his brother, the question throwing him off. Before he could answer Reaper fell from the rafters with a thud and a grown. “O fuck me, my head.” Reaper said.

Longstrider chuckled. “Na, I don’t think so.”

The brothers chuckled as Forge got up. “Alright” he said, “Time to wake-” He stopped as Quicksilver floated toward his face, forming into a phone.

“Huh” he said puzzled as he grabbed it “Twilight must of figured out that the girls could call me. I should tell her that this is only for emergencies though…. Hello?”

Instead of the Twilight or one of the other elements voices coming out of the phone, it was the voice of a dead man.

“Hello brother.”

If his ‘phone’ didn’t float by itself Forge would have dropped it in shock.

“I’m sure you’re surprised to hear from me, you did ‘kill’ me after all. But forget about that, I have somepony that would like to talk to you. Say something dear.”

“F-Forge h-help! This -uck!”

“That’s enough Rarity, dear. Well it was nice talking to you Forge, ta ta.”

The three Thanes looked at each other in shock, then anger. The betrayer had captured Rarity to do god knows what to her! Well now they would to the job right this time, Ironheart wasn’t coming out alive.

Forge snarled. “Longstrider go see if the other elements are okay, Reaper, you and me are getting everyone up” Forge checked the connection of his Quicksilver. It showed that Rarity’s quicksilver was at the diamond dog cave “we got a pony to save!”

They nodded at each other as Forge walked over to some of the guards, kicking and bellowing for them to get up…

20 minutes later…

In short order Celestia and Luna were made aware of the situation, the elements had no less than 30 guards protecting each of them, the rest of the guards were ready to storm the cave, and the Thanes were ready for battle.

Twilight, who was being dogged by her guards walked over to Forge, who was bellowing orders as he strapped his sword on with a good number of throwing axes. The confused unicorn didn’t know why she had to come to the fort with the and why the others were here, but in her opinion it couldn’t be good.

“Forge, what’s going on? Why are we here? And where is Rarity?” She asked.

Forge looked down at her and grimaced. “Rarity’s been kidnapped.”

“WHAT?!” Twilight roared. “We need to go sa-”

“Not we” Forge said “You five are staying here, when Celestia and Luna get here tell them to get to the diamond dog cave.”

Before Twilight could say anything Forge turned to the assembled soldiers. “Alright fillies” he said, “time to move out. You know your role in this op, if this isn’t done to perfection then a civilian could die. Now do we want that?”

“SIR NO SIR!”

“Out-fucking-standing!” With that everyone that had to go raced to the diamond dog cave, leaving an upset Twilight and friends in the dust…

Two goblins waited at the entrance of the cave, ready to kill anything that dared to show itself. One of the goblins turned toward the other one, bored out of his mind. “Hey Ifth.”

“Ya Narf?”

“Do you want to play a game of I spy?” Ifth looked at Narf for a long moment.

“*sigh* you go first.” The big goblins looked around excitedly for something that he was sure that his guardsmate wouldn’t see.

“O o o I spy with my little-*snap*” No one would know what Narf the goblin was spying after that, Forge snapping his neck as the other goblin had his throat cut by Reaper.

Throwing the guards into the bushes the two Thanes stealthily snuck into the mouth of the cave, avoiding or killing the random patrols that they happened to cross. Soon they made it to the main chamber, seeing that the goblins had been quite busy.

There was a foul smell in the air, something between rotten meat and hot dirty garbage. There were stacks of rickety bridges that crisscrossed the whole thing, a standard in goblin caves. The sounds of pickaxes hitting stone could be heard even from where they were.

Forge grimaced “The goblins must have killed the dogs and set up shop a few weeks ago. Why did that fucker have to use goblins?”

“What does fuck mean silly?” Fortunately for Pinkie, Forge stopped himself from destroying her face with his armor plated fist. He turned toward her and scowled along with Reaper, who was about to stab her. What was worse was that Pinkie wasn’t alone, the other elements were there too, each of them sporting big smiles.

“What the fuck are you girls doing here?! How did you get away from your guards?”

……

The Fort

A large group of guards waited patiently outside the restrooms. One of them looked at one of his fellow female guardsman, a perplexed expression on his face.

“Why do mares spend so much time in the bathroom?” he asked her.

The mare chortled “I can’t tell you that silly” she told him “You have to get into the fillies only club.”

“Alright… How long do you think they’ll be in there?”

“For about another two hours or so…”

……

Back at the cave

Forge looked at the girls carefully after they told him they snuck out of the bathroom. “So you’re telling me that you left the safety of your guards and snuck into the most dangerous place you could be at the moment?”

Twilight nodded confidently at him. “We need to help!”

Forge growled at her. “Twilight” he said slowly “This is a rescue and destroy op. Are you going to kill anyone?” Her and the girls horrified expressions were all answer he needed.

Turning toward Reaper he said, “Reaper get these girls back to the surface I’ll wait here and-”

With a roar the finally realized that they were surrounded by goblins, with no less than fifty arrows trained on them. Seeing that they were trapped he glared at Twilight, who was standing there terrified.

“This is your goddamn fault…”

The goblins herded the group through a network of bridges and passages, the ponies shaking in fear and the two Thanes were still pretty pissed off at the girls. They also had their weapons taken off them and their arms were bound, which did not improve their moods.

Twilight trotted closer to Forge, who was growling at a pair of the black monsters that were trying to carry all of his throwing axes. If she was honest with herself, Twilight was scared out of her mind, the goblins were talking about what parts of the ponies they were going to get for supper and that really wasn’t making her feel comfortable.

Twilight ‘the egghead’ Sparkle, who was too terrified to use that brilliant mind of hers, decided to ask Forge an obvious question. “Forge, what are we going to do?”

Forge looked down at her, a frown on his face. “Since we can’t escape without one of you girls getting killed we need to wait for an opportunity.”

Applejack, who was carrying a petrified Fluttershy on her back, looked at Forge like he had just grown a new head. “Whatcha mean we gotta wait?”

“Ya!” Rainbow said “Why don’t ya just burn them all up?”

Forge rolled his eyes and nudged his head at the two groups ahead and behind them, the goblins that had arrows notched and trained at them. “I can get the ones close to us but we’ll look like porcupines before anyone of us takes two steps.”

“No talking!” A goblin roared, hitting Forge in the back of his helmet with his spear. Said Thane stopped and spun around. Before the goblin could act he head butted it so hard the goblin slumped to the ground, dead, its face smashed in.

The whole group stopped, shocked at the dead goblin. Fluttershy took one look at the body before throwing up, followed by Twilight, then Applejack, Rainbow was able to keep her lunch down. Forge ignored all this, his helmet covered in blood and gore, content with just growling at the monsters, who muttered angrily at the human but did nothing to him, they had their orders after all.

Forge looked at the pale, sick, and scared Twilight, a calming smile on his face. Patting her on the head to told her, “It’ll be okay Twilight, there’s more going on than our asses getting captured. Call it a lucky guess but I think we’ll be free in no time”…

…..

The lower levels of the cave

A group of goblin guards waited under one of the support beams that held up everything above. Two were asleep and the other two were about ready to conk out. If the guard on the left was a little more alert he would have noticed the midnight blue hoof raise up behind him.

“Judo chop!” Chopping the goblin in the neck NightWing watched as the goblin slumped down, out cold. Her other squadmates were a little more brutal in their takedowns, usually consisting of swords or knives to the throat.

Cloud rolled his eyes at Night as he whipped the blood off his blade. “Was that necessary?”

Driving her blade through the unconscious goblins neck, NightWing looked up at him with a smile. “I wanted to see if it would work.”

Rolling his eyes again Cloud put his blade away and walked over to the giant support beam right in front of them, the others following. Walking around it Gilda whistled, the stone support was at least thirty feet around and completely solid.

“How in the buck are we going to break that?” The griffin asked as the unicorn of the squad’s horn glowed, her magic trying to find weaknesses in the rock.

“Is there any way to break it clean Sunshine?” Cloud asked.

The mare shook her head. “Nope, and I don’t think I have any spells to blow through it either.”

Night rolled her eyes and pushed the mare out of the way, her nose in the air. “Don’t worry everypony; I got this.” Trotting up to the beam she looked it up and down, a thoughtful look on her face.

“Hmmmmm….”

After a moment she nodded, a look of realization on her face. Turning around Night reared her back legs and bucked the beam as hard as she could, her squad watching with a mixture of confusion and face-hoofing as her legs connected to the stone, a sharp thud resonating throughout the giant room.

What happened a moment after was what everyone was pretty much expecting. Night howled, dropping to the ground and rolling around.

“Owowowowowowowowowowowowowo!” she yelled.

“Night!” Cloud hissed, “quiet down, we don’t want-“

BRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

The group flinched then glared at Night, who smiled sheepishly back at them. The horn blared again, the ponies and griffin were instantly made aware of a huge group of goblins, heavily armed goblins that there running toward them, some calling for their blood, some yelling war cries.

Night rose and drew her sword, the others drawing right after her, ready for the grim battle. Night and Cloud looked at each other, a small smirk on Night’s face. “I’ll take the ones on the right” she said to him “You can get the rest.”

Despite the direness of the situation Cloud and the others couldn’t help but chuckle….

Forge and the others were led to what looked like a crossroads of sorts, goblins covering every inch of the bridges throughout the cavern. A little ways away there was a cliff that probably served as a balcony.

Forge growled and at once noisy goblins quieted. “Just come out you cunt so we can get this over with.”

There was a resounding laughter that echoed throughout dome. The girls shivered, this wasn’t a happy laugh or a joy-filled laugh, it was a laugh that held no warmth in it at all.

It was so quiet that that they could hear someone’s footsteps resounding up on the hill, revealing Ironheart with Rarity in tow. Forge quietly breathed a sigh of relief, other than looking as scared as all hell the mare looked perfectly fine.

Ironheart looked down at his brothers with contempt. “Hello Forge, Reaper, you two haven’t aged a day.”

Forge and Reaper just turned their heads and spat, the hate plain on their faces.

Ironheart tsked as the goblins muttered angrily at the Thanes, fingering their collective blades. “Now what kind of greeting is that? I thought you’d be happy to see your long lost brother.”

“You’re no brother of mine.” Forge growled.

The mares saw a look of fury of the red-eyed humans face for an instant, which soon turned into a cool look. It looked like he was about to retort when there was a large crash to the right of them.

“I’m coming Rarity!” A voice yelled.

“Is that… Spike?” Twilight asked as everyone turned to see the purple dragon with a sword he had somehow acquired.

Spike jumped heroically over a group of goblins and landed in with the ponies and humans. “Don’t worry guys” he said, walking over to a goblin “I’ll free us.” He then proceeded to wave his sword around, not hitting the goblins at all. What was worse was that he was making swooshing sounds.

Forge’s hand became well acquainted with his face as the goblins started to laugh. One of the said monsters took a step forward and lazily swiped Spike’s sword out of his hand, sending the goblins into further hysterics.

His hand still stuck to his face Forge said with mock enthusiasm, “Good fucking job Spike! You really saved us!”

Wiping a tear from his eye, Ironheart raised his hand, almost thirty arrows being drawn and trained at the soon to be doomed group. “By the way” Ironheart said, “Where is Longstrider? I would have liked to of heard one of his witty remarks before you all died.”

Forge chuckled, “Oh, he’s right behind you.”

The fallen Thane looked confused at the statement. That confusion turned into shock and then pain as Longstrider put his knife through his throat and knocked him down from the hill to fall at the group’s feet.

As the goblins stood around confused at what happened the Thanes acted. Reaper grabbed Spike and yanked him toward the group as Forge put his mailed fist into the face of the guard that was holding their weapons, the force of the punch sending the said weapons into the air and the goblins through his brothers, sending many of them crashing over the bridge and down toward the abyss below.

While the weapons were still in the air Forge tossed Reaper his knives and launched his sword a little higher in the air before grabbing his throwing axes, which he use to devastating effect coupled with Longstrider’s arrows. Longstrider, after shooting everything that had a bow and arrow in his hand grabbed a now dazed Rarity and jumped down.

The goblins as a group took a few steps back as the events unfolded. Grinning as he caught his blade Forge looked at the group of bewildered ponies and dragon. “Reaper, Longstrider, Spike, each of you grab two mares, we’re making a hasty retreat, I’ll lead the front.”

Nodding they did what Forge said as the goblins regained their senses, pulling out their weapons and starting toward the group, intent on avenging their leader. Flicking his wrist Forge watched as a thick cluster of steel bars shot out from his gauntlet and became a shield. Slamming his new shield into his sword Forge roared, the goblins taking a step back at the ferocity.

Getting his battle giggles Forge pointed toward a bridge and raced to it, the other two humans and dragon, with ponies in tow, following. Some of the goblins tried to get out of the way as Forge crashed into them, content with just knocking them down from the bridge as an army of goblins were right at their heels.

At this point most of the girls had gotten out of their shock. Rarity and Fluttershy were clutching desperately to Spike, Pinkie was having a blast, yelling “weeeeee!” as Twilight closed her eyes, hoping against hope that this was all a dream. Longstrider though as having problems with Rainbow, who was trying to wiggle out of his grasp.

The group watched as a massive group of the beasts charging toward them, their spears pointed outward. Realizing that Forge was too gone to stop from attacking the group, Reaper charged up and kicked his snarling brother in the ass to the walkway above them.

“Ow, you fucker!” Forge roared as he started for the goblins on his level.

“Longstrider, Spike, get up there!” Reaper yelled as he dodged a volley of arrows.

Spike looked up at him, scared out of his mind, as he held Fluttershy and Rarity. There’s no way I can make that jump! He thought as looked up at the walkway, which was about fifteen feet above them.

He was about to tell Reaper this he looked at Rarity and then he stopped. The mare was looking up at him with the utmost confidence. She believed in him… As the realization washed over him the drake’s back straightened, if she believed in him he could do it!

Holding his breath and bending his knees Spike jumped into the air as hard as he could, not taking into account that he might be way stronger than he was when he was little.

“TOO HIGH SPIKE!” Rarity shrilly yelled as they sailed over the walkway and landed hard, Spike rolling to his feet.

Satisfied that the others were safe Reaper threw Pinkie and Twilight up as well and drew his blades as the goblins grew ever closer.

“Come on, just a liiittle closer.” The Thane muttered as the goblins grinned, ready to tear the human apart. With a flick of his wrist Reapers daggers flew past the group to cut the walkways ropes. The goblins only had time to scream in fright as the walkway gave way, Reaper jumping up to safety with a small smile on his face.

His reprieve was cut short as another group of the monsters came up from behind him, Reaper using his Kenyan speed to catch his brothers.

“Quite it Dash!” Longstrider growled as he dodged a throwing spear that sailed right past him.

The cyan mare wouldn’t relent though, “Let me go!” She yelled “I Can help!”

Applejack smacked her friend, a disapproving look on her face. “Quiet it Dash! Ya can’t go flying around anyway with all those arrows flyin’ around, you’ll get hurt!”

Grumbling the Pegasus stopped as Longstrider looked down at her and grinned. “Don’t worry Dash, we wouldn’t even need your help in a few minutes, the house is going to be brought down on this place in a minute or two.”…

The goblins were almost upon them and the little squad was ready to die heroically, Night was in fact aiming to gut one of the biggest in the pack, the one that was leading the charge with a massive greatsword in hand.

But as the goblins got within arm’s length a few things happened at once.

A massive amount of magical discharge was unleashed in the room.

Three figures landed in front of the surprised guardsponies and griffin.

Finally, the goblins were turned into dust by said magic.

As the smoke cleared the group was able to make out the figures, it was Celestia, Luna, and empress Isbalia. Not forgetting that they were now in the presence of royalty the squad scrambled to bow, making Celestia giggle quietly to herself.

“Rise my subjects and Private Gilda, there is no need for that here.”

Luna butted in, “We hath come to aid thee.”

Night nudged her head at the massive pillar. “We could use a little help with that.”

Oddly the griffins empress was the one to help out. “Don’t worry dearie” She motherly tone, patting Night in the cheek before walking up to the pillar.

Looking to up and down she nodded to herself. Gilda watched as the griffin turned from the usually massively overweight motherly griffin into a terror, what Gilda thought was fat shifted into pure muscle as Isbalia roared and took a swipe at the poor pillar. Watching as it exploded on impact Gilda couldn’t help but gulp. I’m glad I work for her Gilda thought as the cave started to violently shake, singling that a mountain was about to fall on their heads….

“Everything’s shaking, why is everything shaking?!” Rainbow screamed as a boulder fell down from the ceiling and smashed into a neighboring bridge, killing every goblin that had the bad luck to be on it.

Longstrider grinned down at her as they saw the entrance to the tunnel. “I told you the house was going to be brought down!” In front of them Forge kept laughing as the now retreating goblins tried to get away from the berserk Thane.

Another boulder fell and this time hit their bridge, thankfully bouncing off but sending everyone on that bridge into the air. As luck would have it the Thanes were thrown through the entrance, landing painfully on the ground in front of the rest to the army of recruits.

Forge was on his feet in an instant, roaring out orders as the elements and Spike were herded away. “form up, form up you bastards! We got company!”

Getting to the front line of the battle formation Forge grinned as the goblins started to stream out. Looks like the new Thanes are getting a baptism by fire he gleefully thought as he and his new brothers and sisters answered the monsters war cries with their own…

20 minutes later

Celestia looked down at her student with disappointment. Twilight’s friends were crowded around Rarity, coddling the mare as the unicorn held her head down in shame.

“I’m very disappointed, Twilight.” The princess said, the words hitting Twilight like a ton of bricks as the princess continued.

“You deliberately disobeyed me and put everypony in danger. Those goblins aren’t like anything you’ve ever fought!”

“Princess” Twilight said, her voice barely a whisper. “Who was that human?”

Those words hit Celestia like a ton of bricks, even now she could still barely belief that Ironheart was alive. “....He was a friend turned enemy by dear student, and his betrayal was felt by us all.” The monarch whispered, not believing for an instant that he wasn’t still alive somewhere.

“Well that was fun.” Longstrider muttered as he and Forge walked through the throngs of dead and dying goblins. The plan had worked perfectly, none of the good guys were hurt and the goblins that weren’t crushed by rocks were killed by their blades. Some of the group were hurt though, and others were throwing up because the horrors of battle.

Longstrider gave his brother a cheery smile as he drove a spear through a goblin. “Well this turned out to be a good day, the bad guys died and the good guys won!”

Forge grunted but said nothing, killing a goblin with a flick of his wrist. “How did that bastard survive?” He muttered.

His brother turned toward him with a shrug. “No idea, we saw Warlock hang him after all. Maybe Discord did something to him to make him unkillable.”

Forge grunted again. “With our luck the bastard isn’t dead.”

Longstrider smiled at that. “Then we can just kill the bastard again! And next time we can take our time with him!” Forge smiled darkenly at that as he stabbed the last goblin. Tia would use her sun powers and the goblins would be dust in a little while.

“Alright fillies!” He yelled “Time for graduation!”…

“Why couldn’t they of at least let us take a bath first?” Cloud grumbled next to Night as he waited with the Thanes for their graduation.

The batmare nudged him and grinned. “Eager to get assigned Skippy? Hopefully we get stuck together.”

Dear sweet Celestia I hope not Cloud thought as Forge was seen coming out of the smithy.

“Come here fillies!” He called, the now confused group following him into the smithy. What they saw there made all of their tiredness and wounds forgotten.

They finally saw what Forge had spent countless nights working on. There on five hundred mannequins were black sets of armor. Forge chuckled at his guard’s enthusiasm. “Go find your armor ladies, you’re names are on them!”

Looking at each other the guards scrambled to find their armor, and after a lot of pushing and shoving Night found hers. It was all black plate armor with the signature grinning skull on the flank of each one. It was mostly just plain armor though, not worn for decoration or comfort but to protect.

Seeing that others were putting their armor on Night did the same, surprised to see another layer to chainmail under the plate. After five minutes of grunting Night found that her armor was oddly light and fit perfectly.

Soon the guards were chatting about their armor before Forge whistled. “Line up fillies!”

After they followed his orders Forge stood in front of them beaming. “You guys did it! You’re Thanes! All the trials you passed with flying colors! I feel like a mother robin seeing her baby birds fly out of the nest!”

The guards chuckled at this as Forge continued.

“Now some of you are getting a very high honor” The guards perked up at this “You’ll be guarding the elements and training the next batch of soldiers that passes through here. If you are lucky enough to receive this honor you’ll be promoted to Sergeant and your pay will be doubled.”

After that Forge started to rattle off names, the lucky ponies trotting over to him with their chests puffed out in pride. Cloud half listened to the names until he heard, “NightWing!” The said mare flew into the air with a squee and now Cloud was uttering the same saying over and over again, almost like a prayer. Pleasepleasepleaseplease- “CloudKicker!”

Cloud slumped to the ground in defeat as Night flew over to him excitedly. “I knew we would be put in the same assignment! Cloud are you okay?” Cloud now knew that there were no gods, at least no merciful ones. To deal with the situation he did the only thing that he could, try to bash his skull in on the floor….

Rarity sighed as she gave a half-hearted smile to her friends, who wouldn’t stop fawning over her. She really wasn’t in shock or anything, that human hadn’t done much, if anything she was in shock of how much dirt she had gotten on her coat. The girls were all around her with Spike sleeping on a couch, the dragon exhausted from the day’s events.

Her other friends weren’t holding up as well as she was. Most of them were still feeling sick from seeing all of that blood; Twilight was the worst, after the little battle was over Celestia had chewed her out. So it was actually Rarity’s job to comfort her friends, which was odd given that she was the one that was held against her will.

But if she was anything Rarity was a lady, and a lady was there for her friends.

“Rarity, Rarity, Hellooo!” Rarity shook her head, realizing that Twilight was waving a hoof on front of her face.

Biting back comments on her unladylike behavior Rarity smiled and said, “Oh I’m sorry, Twilight, darling, I was just swept up in my own thoughts.”

The girls nodded sympathetically, Twilight put a hoof on her friends shoulder to comfort her. “I understand Ra-” The door slammed open, revealing Forge. Twilight and the others hung their heads low in shame as the Thane entered the room.

Looking over at the girls Forge laughed. “Calm down girls, I’m not mad” They perked up at this “Just remember to leave the dangerous stuff to us. Now” Leaning down he looked Rarity over, making the mares heart flutter.

“Miss Rarity, now you gave Tia a report on what happened, did you leave anything out? Did he say anything that might show where he might have gone if he survived?”

The mare nodded, making Forge grunt. “Alright…. Well if you need anything you know where to find me.”

Rarity watched as her knight in shining armor turned around to go. Now it was her chance!

“Ummm Forger?” She said nervous “Could I speak to you alone?” The other girls took the hint, making up thin excuses before leaving, leaving Forge and Rarity alone with a sleeping Spike. Alright Rarity you can do this! Get your man!

As Rarity was about to speak her undying love to Forge the blacksmith smiled sadly at her. Kneeling down to her eye level he put a hand on her shoulder. “I know what you’re going to say girl.” He said to a now shocked Rarity.

“You Miss Rarity, are a kind giving, mare that will make a stallion very happy when you find the one, you two will grow old and die together. Don’t pick a broken monster like me.” She was about to argue when he put a finger to her lips.

“I can’t give you children and I’ll outlive you by centuries.” Rising he kindly patted her on the cheek. “You find your prince sweetheart.” He said, looking over at Spike with a smile on his face.

Rarity now had tears in her eyes and Forge turned around to leave. The worst part about that was that he was right. Shaking away her tears she smiled up at Forge, who turned back and smiled at her, with that smile she knew that she had someone that would always be there for her.

Rushing over to him Rarity wrapped him into a tight hug, Forge hugging her back….

Elsewhere…

“They killed my sons?”

Ironheart was kneeling before an absolutely massive goblin. The said goblin was calmly on a throne that was flanked by guards on either side. Upon his head was a crown that might have been taken by a diamond dog or griffin lord.

At no less than 20 feet tall Ironheart was kneeling before the king of the goblins Golblac “The King Killer”. The king had calmly listened as Ironheart told the tale of how his sons, the two chieftains that were killed in the skirmish with the Thanes, were killed.

Which was part of the humans plan, but he wasn’t going to tell him that. Disguising a goblin to look like him had been hard enough, but the next phase of the plan was going to be way harder, getting through to this….thing.

Even though it held a image of majesty and power, this goblin king was like his forefathers, all of them hiding from the Celestial sisters. They turned from great warriors and raiders to beast that hid underground to stay hidden the cowards

It had taken all of his skill to get this goblin to break with tradition, to get him to go above ground to attack and pillage like in the days of old.

“Yes my lord.” Looking up at the king Iron couldn’t help but notice how unsettling the goblins eyes were, just two pale blue eyes that hardly seemed to blink stared down at him. If the king was upset that his sons were dead he gave no sign of it.

The king looked down at the pitiful creature down at his feet. He knew for a fact that this human probably had a hand in his son’s deaths. While his death would amuse him the human did have a good plan, decides, he had many more sons.

“Alright human you’ll have your army, this slight can’t go unpunished.”

The now pleased human rose. He had just gotten an army of easily a million soldiers. “You won’t regret this my lord, Equestria will burn.”

The king gave him the barest of smiles. “Yes. Yes It will.”

Author's Note

My brother told me if Rarity was hurt he'd burn by house down, I was inclined to believe he would do it because he had a lighter and a can of gas in his hand, sooo.... Rarity's fine.....

And Fair warning, since School's just around the corner the chapters are going to be slower, maybe once a month.

Over the river and through the woods

Seleis was sprawled on Twilight’s couch eating rubies, bored to tears. It had been a long week for the dragoness; the purple librarian was still trying to bombard her with questions that she didn’t want to answer, and Spike wasn’t much better nowadays; wanting to learn everything that he could about his heritage, but that wasn’t the worst part, because of his new body he needed to relearn basically everything.

Sure it was funny the first few times he ripped a door off its hinges by accident, but it got old after a while….

Fortunately for her the two had been awfully quiet for the past couple of days, apparently Forge and the others had cleaned out a cave full of goblins and Purple and her friends had gotten the bright idea of following them.

Seleis couldn’t help but snort, Twilight and Spike must of seen some killing judging by the haunted looks on their faces. Ponies and their innocence she thought as she chewed on a particularly sour ruby. Grimacing she got up and threw the rest of the gem in the garbage, grumbling the whole way..

As she walked back to the living room she passed a full body mirror. Stopping in front of it she frowned at her figure, doing a little slow spin as she stood there, eyeing herself. Her inactiveness must have been getting to her; her usually perfect figure was starting to develop a little belly.

Grabbing said belly fat she snarled at it, images of her younger chubby self being made fun of flashed in her mind. Sighing she thought up the new workout regimen that she was going to do to become her old fit self again, frowning at all of the ab work that she was going to have to do now.

It would be so much better to get at least workout with someone else Seleis dejectedly thought. After a few moments of following that thought she gasped, she could workout with the one that had gotten her to her fit self in the first place! And because she was just going to ask for a working out buddy he wouldn’t say no to her! What was better was that she would be able to spend more time with him!

Striding outside with a small smile on her face she headed to The Fort….

Grabbing a lower grade file Forge leaned over a worktable, carefully putting the finishing touches on the metal casting that Bonbon had ordered. He had to be careful, the slightest misstroke and fifteen hours of hard work would be ruined. He was so focused on the project that he had forgotten to eat for…. he couldn’t remember, he also didn’t see the red dragoness that was for some reason wearing short shorts and a wife beater, her hair tied into a ponytail.

Almost done Forge thought as a frustrated Seleis stood behind him one or two more quick finishing touches and I’ll be able to get a nice, hot-

“FORGE!”

Forge, surprised at a random voice yelling at him, (for a fleeting moment he thought it was a wrathful voice of god, coming down to smite him for his sins…) scraped the file violently across the metal, ruining much of his hard work. Groaning Forge looked at the dragoness with a frown.

“What?” he asked, raising an eyebrow that she was wearing cloths. “Why are you wearing clothes?”

Seleis huffed, ignoring his question. “I was trying to get your attention for fifteen minutes!”

“I was working.” He said, holding up the now ruined casting.

Seleis’s annoyed expression turned to a worried one. “Forge” she said, “am I fat?”

With a sigh Forge put down the cast and file and turned around to look Seleis over. “You know it’s kinda hard to see when you’re wearing those baggy clothes.” He flinched at how that sounded but she must have been more worried than the blacksmith had thought, all she did was quickly shrug out of her shirt and pants, leaving out the expected sex comments that she would of happily thrown at the human usually.

Looking her over Forge couldn’t help but snort and mutter something about women and their weight. To him she looked fine, an hourglass figure that most human women would be envious of.

“You look fine to me.” Forge said neutrally, hoping that that would be the end of it. To his dismay this didn’t reassure the dragon, it just made her groan and grab a little belly fat.

“But look at this!” she wailed.

“What? You just have a little bit of chub.”

Seleis growled, a bit of fire coming out of her mouth, clearly not happy with his answer. “I don’t want to have ‘a little chub’! You have to be my workout partner again.”

Forge rolled his eyes, ready to retort when he saw that she had tears in her eyes. Sighing again he said, “Fine” Seleis let out a cheer that he ignored “after I get back from Everfree we can start.”

Seleis cocked her head at that. “Why are you going into Everfree?”

Turning back to his workbench he looked over the mold to see if it could be salvaged. As he tried to work on it he answered her, “I want to see if my old apprentice is still there, he has my Lexicon and I’ve been meaning to make some more Quicksilver. anyways”

Seleis grinned at the image of a jet black baby dragon scrambling to get his master more coal that suddenly appeared in her head. “I want to come.”

Forge, who had been trying to file the mold, trying to see if it could be salvaged, dropped the mold in shock, right onto his foot. Grabbing his foot, hopping around and cursing as Seleis laughed, he said between his foul language, “No, I’ll go faster by myself.”

All he got for that salvo was a cat-like smile. “How are you going to stop me from coming?”

She pressed on as Forge was trying to find an answer for that. “We can run the whole way so I’ll get in good cardio! You still remember where the little guy was right?”

“Yes I do” He allowed, still trying to figure out how to get her to not go. She would laugh at him if he told her was too dangerous, he couldn’t leave without her, she’d watch the house, and he couldn’t say that she’d slow him down.

Seeing that there was no way out of taking her he said, “Fine.”

Seleis squeed and barely refrained from tackling him into a hug, Forge was already uncomfortable enough with her being around him I’ll have to fix that she thought as she grinned.

Putting her clothing back on seductively as possible for Forge, who was staring intently at the mold with a mixture of resignation and hopelessness, Seleis couldn’t help but grope Forge with her tail as she said, “Alright, pick me up at twelve~”

Forge flinched at the contact and moved away from her. As Seleis left he looked at the ruined mold with a sigh. “It’s going to be a long couple of days.” He muttered as he threw the mold back into a forge, readying for another long day…

A few days later…

“Alright Trixie, don’t burn the forge down when I’m away. Remember that that wagon project needs to be finished in two days.”

“Do you doubt the great and powerful Trixie’s abilities?! She’ll have it done by tomorrow, monkey!”

Ignoring her he turned toward Chrissy. “Make sure that Vinyl doesn’t break anything.”

“Hey!”

Ignoring the DJ he continued, turning toward SteelWing he said with a small frown on his face, “Why are you still here?” He said looking at the Steelwing.

SteelWing rolled her eyes and ruffled her feathers. “The princess and my empress wanted us to stay.”

Even though he grumbled to himself he didn’t say anything. Truth be told the fat griffin mildly terrified him, so he would just grit his teeth and let the birds stay until he could figure out a way to kick them out.

“Since you’re the highest rank I leave the troops to you; get Reaper and Longstrider to come around here every once in a while alright?”

Nodding, the griffin saluted and flew off, leaving Forge alone by himself. Still grumbling he checked his supplies that he was going to be bringing to the forest. He had a knife, 5 days’ worth of food, 10 days of water, clothes, and the best sleeping bag that he could buy.

Seeing that everything was in order he looked around, still not seeing the dragoness. She wanted to fucking come he thought and of course she’s fucking late! What’s she do-

“Ready Forgey?!”

For the second time that week Forge almost jumped out of his skin, probably clearing six feet. Spinning around he saw a smiling Seleis, who for some god awful reason was still wearing clothes.

Squinting at her it even looked like she was wearing a bra. Even more important than that she only had the cloths on her back, no bag full of supplies, no knife, sure she was probably more dangerous than most things in the forest but this was getting pretty ridiculous.

“You don’t want to come now Seleis?” Forge asked, hoping against hope that that was the reason that she didn’t have anything with her.

To his despair she just cocked her head looking confused. “What do ya mean Forgey?”

“You don’t have any gear; I just thought you were here to wish me good luck.”

Sel’s giggled and stood right next to the blacksmith, much to his discomfort. “Na, I didn’t think I’d need anything. I’m a dragon for goodness sakes!”

“You won’t be the most dangerous thing in that forest” Forge said, hoping to keep her here, “You know you could help Trixie with the forging, I’m sure that she’d appreciate the help.”

Looking up at Forge with a quivering lip and tears in her eyes the dragon said, “You don’t want to come with you Forgey?”

‘No’ Forge was about to say when he got a look at her ‘sad face’. With a groan Forge covered his eyes with his hands and said, “No no no, I want you to come, just stop making that fucking face!”

With a squee the dragoness tackled Forge into a hug, the disgruntled Thane having to keep both of them from toppling over.

“Alright” Forge grumbled to himself, “So let’s get this straight, I’m going have to share my food and water with you…Hummm… Rationing everything I should still have-”

“Come on Forgey!” Seleis said, breaking Forge’s train of thought “daylight’s burning and I want to get some cardio in!” To put her point across she started to run in place.

Looking her up and down Forge snorted and adjusted his pack and gear. You want a fucking run? He savagely thought I’ll give you a run…..

Many hours later…

“Come on Seleis, you need to keep up!” Forge yelled at the dragon, who was panting and looking ready to pass out. Now she remembered why most people hated when Forge was their trainer.

The man had kept the same grueling pace for the last five hours, it was somewhere between a hard jog, and a light sprint and it was killing her. Seleis couldn’t feel her feet, her lungs were on fire, and she was fading in and out of consciousness every few steps.

But hey, she must of lost like ten pounds already right?

Forge on the other hand looked fine, he even almost looked bored, pointing out things that she needed to watch running over or telling her that she needed to pick it up. If she wasn’t so exhausted Sel’s would be envious of his stamina and fitness.

Looking back over his shoulder Forge saw that Seleis was a mess, her red face saw starting to go blue from oxygen deprivation. Forge also almost chuckled at how her clothes were now askew and soaked. I better stop soon he thought she might drop if I don’t… Luckily for Seleis they were about to pass a really good camping spot by a river.

Slowing down to a stop Forge turned around and told the red dragon, “Alright Seleis, we’ll stop here for the night.”

All she could do was nod before falling over with a happy groan. Taking his bag off and rolling his eyes Forge walked over to Seleis and picked her up. “You could have told me to slow down.” He told her as he carried her to the river.

“I *pant* didn’t *pant* want to be *pant a bother. Besides *pant* need to lose a few *pant* pounds.” She told him as he helped her take off her clothing and gently put her in the water. The dragoness gave a happy groan as Forge walked over to his bag and pulled out a couple of bananas, walking back over to her he peeled one and gave it to her.

“Eat these” he said “You won’t be as sore in the morning. I’ll get the camp ready.”

All she could was nod weakly with a small smile on her face. Even though he was scared of her he was still trying to make her as comfortable as possible, basically same old Forge as when she was first working out with him.

As she floated lazily in the water Seleis thought over when she first started to work out with the blacksmith. Pain and soreness was pretty much a daily thing for her back then, but it was also filled with Forge’s words of encouragement and his remedies for soreness; she hated the bananas but Forge could give one hell of a massage.

What to Forge back then was simple kindness got Seleis through her training routine, giving her the body that she had always wanted. What she also got that she didn’t expect was a huge, almost blinding crush on him.

She didn’t know how long she was musing because the next thing she knew Forge had set up camp with a fire crackling merrily. Seeing that Forge was about to start to cook Seleis steeled herself, wading the water and climbing onto land where gravity was in full effect. Gritting her teeth she took a stiff step, then another, then another until she was right next to Forge by the campfire.

“Whatcha cooking?” she asked as she plopped down next to him. “I’m starving.”

Without looking up from the fire the blacksmith said, “Sausages… I can cook something else if you want. I think I got some beans in the bag-”

“No, sausage it fine.” The dragon hurriedly said, scrunching her face at the mere thought of beans.

As they ate in silence the sun dipped over the horizon, turning the already dark forest pitch black. Tossing her a sleeping bag Forge said to Seleis, “Alright, you’d better get some sleep, we got a long day tomorrow” Looking over to the dragoness he smiled thinly “I’ll go easier on you tomorrow.”

Too tired to do anything other than nod, Seleis wiggled under the sleeping bag; before sleep took her she murmured, “Goodnight Forgey.”

“Goodnight Seleis.”

Why wouldn’t you call me Sel’s? Seleis thought sadly you were the one that gave me the nickname….”

The Next Day…

Forge looked down at Seleis, a bemused look on his face as the dragoness rolled around on the ground holding her ankle. The story she told him was that she tripped and hurt herself. Needless to say Forge wasn’t happy.

“You’re fine, get up and quite being a baby.”

“But I’m hurt!”

Forge rolled his eyes. “Your bones are harder than diamonds.”

Seleis huffed. “It’s not the bone! I think I sprained my ankle.”

With a groan Forge crouched down and gently poked at the accused ankle, Seleis flinching in pain even with his gentle touch. Forge grimaced yep, its fucking sprained just his luck too, they were still about three or four days to their location.

Leaving her here wasn’t an option and he wasn’t going to let her walk for a day or two. Taking off his backpack he leaned down and picked the dragon up gently.

“What are you doing?” She asked as the blacksmith put her in his back. She wasn’t complaining or anything, her ankle did hurt like hell so it wasn’t a good idea to walk on and it was nice that she was close to him.

“Carrying you.” He said, “Grab that bag” Seleis’s tail wrapped around the bag and Forge started to carefully traverse the terrain, trying not to jerk her ankle. “We’re going to have to go all night for a couple of days, if you’re hungry just get some jerky from the bag.”

Now that she was feeling guilty, she tried to assure him that she was fine. “I’m okay Forgey, you can put me down.”

Forge just snorted at that, he could hear the pain in her voice. “You’re fine where you are.”

Seleis was about to retort when it hit her Are you going to ruin your chance to be this close his Forge dummy? She thought to herself just shut up and enjoy it! And enjoy it she did. Putting her head on his shoulder and wrapping her arms around Forge tightly, Seleis sighed as Forge flinched. As the two made their way through the forest one hoped that this would never end and the other hoping that this ordeal would be over as soon as possible….

“Seleis wake up. WAKE UP!”

“Huh?” Seleis slurred, her voice riddled with sleep. I must have fallen asleep she dimly thought as she noticed that the gentle rocking that was Forge’s pace was replaced by sprinting.

BOOM!

The dragon flinched, finally noticing that it was raining quite hard. In her opinion they might as well have been in a hurricane.

BOOM!

There was a flash of blinding light as Forge dove to the side, Seleis had to tighten her grip so as not to go flying. That’s some lightning Seleis thought, not particularly worried, dragons were tough SOBs, lightning would hurt her as much as fire does, as in not at all. She was about to explain this to Forge so he wouldn’t need to dance around so she wouldn’t get hurt when the thought occurred to her that maybe the dodging was for his benefit not hers.

“SELEIS” Forge roared, dodging a tree that was flying in their direction. “ARE YOU AWAKE? I NEED YOU’RE HELP FINDING SOMEWHERE TO GET OUT OF THIS STORM!”

Instead of wasting time and energy answering him she just tapped his shoulder to signal that she was awake. Using her sharper dragon sight she spotted a cave about a mile’s distance to their right.

“OVER THERE FORGE!” She yelled, pointing at the caves general direction. Trusting her Forge made a beeline toward what he hoped was safety. The forest and the weather did their best to stop them though, hurricane speed winds coupled with Forge having to run around trees and foliage was making that mile seem like ten.

To make their lucky day even better, Forge spotted a massive tree that was near the mouth of the cave. This wasn’t bad in itself but the wind was starting to pull the ancient pine free from the ground.

Crack!

With a final tug the tree was torn from its roots, the massive thing like a toy to the wind as it flew right at them. Forge couldn’t help but snort at his fortune I’m not going to be able to get out of that things way He thought as the tree got ever closer. How am I going to- Wait a second! I got a great idea!

Grabbing the dragoness from his back Forge lifted her in front of him, hoping that she’d get the idea. If not then at least he wouldn’t see the tree crushing him so it was a win-win situation. Just as the tree was in smash-the-human-to-bitty-pieces range Forge felt Seleis’s chest inhale a massive amount of oxygen to the point that it seemed like her chest would burst. Here it comes! Forge thought as Seleis opened her maw, Forge hiding behind the dragon as best as he could.

Dragon’s fire when its normal is as hot as a fire in a fireplace, about twelve to fifteen hundred degrees. What most people don’t know that if trained to do it properly, a dragon can get that temperature up to ten times that number, the flame blinding white instead of your usual reds and blues that a fire usually contains. This super-heated flame is called, in whispers, the death flame.

Luckily for Forge he had one of the dragons that could do that in his arms. An ocean of white fire erupted from the dragon’s maw, hitting the tree. In less than three seconds the tree was no more but a pile of wet ash; Forge jumped through the mouth of the cave as lightning struck where they had just been standing.

Hugging the dragoness to his chest tightly, Forge turned their bodies so he was on the bottom as they hit the hard, rocky ground.

“oof” Forge grunted as Seleis’s warm body landed on him.

She was giggling hysterically. “That was awesome!” She yelled as Forge took a short breather..

“Grrrrrr….” The human and dragon looked around at the noise, thinking that they had stumbled on some animals cave, but the odd thing was that they were the only things in said cave.

“Grrrrr…”

Looking down at his stomach Forge found the creature, his empty ass stomach.

“Seleis pass me the bag I’m starving.” He said to the dragon, who blinked, looked around at her person, and smiled sheepishly.

“I… don’t seem to have it….” She said to him.

Instead of yelling at her or being mad Forge just sighed, realizing how cold it was inside the cave. “It’s…fine, we just need to wait the storm out here.” Forge started to shiver uncontrollably, his clothes were soaked and it seemed like it was only getting colder, so cold that Forge was getting worried about freezing to death.

Seleis on the other hand was steaming, her inner fire preventing her from feeling cold. Looking over to Forge she saw him shivering, his lips starting to turn blue. Ignoring her hurt ankle she scrambled toward him.

Before Forge could say anything she put a claw to his cheek, gasping. “You’re freezing!” She cried, “I need to get a fire started for you!”

Forge couldn’t help but rolled his eyes as his teeth chattered. “G-good l-lu-uck fi-inding d-dry w-wood.” He told her.

A whine of panic escaped the dragoness’s throat as she frantically searched the empty room for something to warm him up. Then a thought occurred to her. Picking the half-frozen Thane Seleis sat down and put him in her lap, wrapping her wings around Forge for extra warmth.

“What are you doing?” Forge asked as he tried to struggle out of her grasp. Seleis just snorted, basically holding him down.

“Shush you, we need to share body heat or you’ll freeze to death.”

Sighing, Forge just nodded. There was no arguing with her logic. “Alright” he grumbled, “Just no funny business, I’m not below freezing to death with digni-” Forge stopped when he felt something wet fall into his hair. Looking up he saw that Seleis was crying.

Shocked the blacksmith said, “Seleis, why are you crying?!”

“Y-you m-must hate m-me.” She said as she softly cried. “I-I messed u-up everything between us and y-you hate me.”

Forge sighed at that, spinning around and hugging her. “Seleis” he said, already feeling warmer “You have done some things that were wrong” the dragoness flinched at that “but I’ve known you for thirty years, well, if you don’t count the two thousand being frozen, you’re probably my only friend.”

Sniffling and wiping her eyes, happy that Forge was holding her she said, “What about Longstrider and Reaper?”

“They’re family, it doesn’t count.”

A small smile now on her face Seleis nuzzled Forge, not seeing the sad look that Forge was giving the wall. As the two fell asleep one was happy at her restored friendship and the other feeling the familiar sadness that he felt whenever he was near a certain red dragon…

The next day…

“You’re ankles’ better right? I can carry you a bit more.” Forge offered as the human and dragon exited the cave.

Seleis smiled, she could still that Forge was kinda-sorta-somewhat scared of her, but that was way better than they had been in years. “Na, I’m better now.” She said, wiggling her ankle to get the point across.

Forge nodded, accepting her answer as the two looked around to see the damage that the storm had caused.

Snorting with amusement the blacksmith said, “Well, at least we don’t have to walk around that many trees now.”

All around them it looked like most of the forest had been uprooted, broken and fallen trees all around. The sky had cleared but you could still feel the dampness in the air, almost everything was dripping in a way that would almost look pretty if it wasn’t for the smoldering scorch marks from the lightning dotting the landscape.

Cracking his neck Forge looked up at the a bright, blue, and sunny sky. “Alright” he said, “We’re still going to go slow today, there’s no reason to mess that ankle again. Even with the slow pace we’ll get to the cave by sundown.”

Nodding silently Seleis followed him, both of them making a leisurely pace through what was left of the forest. After an hour or so of silent walking Seleis decided to start a conversation,

“Forge”

“Hmmm?”

“Do you have any idea why that apprentice of yours decided to live all the way out here?”

Since she was behind Forge she couldn’t see his face but she could tell that he was smiling. “Scales always wanted to be alone. Besides, the Thanes needed somewhere to place all of our swag at. Scales got a quiet place to work and we got a dragon to guard our dangerous shit.”

Seleis raised an eyebrow, Forge could almost feel it. Turning around be added defensively, “It’s not all dangerous stuff, we got some stuff we…. may have borrowed from our world.”

“Like?...”

“Some books, some toys… the Coca Cola secret recipe, stuff like that… You know Seleis” Forge said, trying to steer the conversation away from all of the illegal stuff they stole. “You haven’t told me how you’ve been since we’ve been frozen.”

Smiling Seleis spent hours recounting what had happened over the last two thousand years, the marriage proposals that her father had tried to get her to consent to, the rivals that she had to fight and beat, even a rather embarrassing time she thought that she had scale rot. Before either of them knew it they were there, at the mouth of a giant cave.

Seeing that the mouth of the cave had skulls of Manticore’s, Hydras, and worse things Seleis snorted, “Scales, certainly hasn’t lost his taste for theatrics.”

Looking up they saw that to really show that visitors were not welcome, there was a rather large sign that read,

You are now entering the lair of Scales Hammersmith. Kindly piss off, I don’t want anything you’re selling!

Snorting back a laugh Forge started into the cave. “Alright, time to see the ol’ apprentice…”

Author's Note

Sorry for the subpar Chapter guys.... I've been a bit busy with other stuff so be kind. O am I'm putting this on a little hiatus until I get these one shots out of my system, so ya...