The front axle creaked ghoulishly as the wagon rolled along the dusty road. The wagon itself was called the 'Perfection Prowess Red and White Wine Press 7000', formerly known as the 'Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 6000'. Its owners had modified the machine on top to press grapes into wine rather than apples into cider, hoping their little reinvention would prove to be more fruitful than their previous attempts.
Unfortunately, the tinkering with their machines function didn't grant the desired success, which left the owners, the infamous Flim Flam brothers, rather distressed. They hadn't spoken to each other ever since they fled Hoofington and its enraged mob that had formed in its town center, and they had no intention of changing this.
The hours passed slowly on the cart road, since the landscape offered little variation, with wild meadows adjacent on both sides for miles, so the brothers didn't mind when the night's darkness slowly crept its way onto the sky.
They hadn't seen a house or another pony in hours and were about to get accustomed to the idea of having to sleep in the open, when a lone farmhouse appeared on the horizon. It was an old house, but it was still going strong, and despite having all its light extinguished (which was to be expected given that nightfall had been three hours ago on this early autumn evening) it was unmistakably inhabited.
“Seems we're in luck, brother of mine. We might get to sleep indoors tonight after all,” said Flam, the first words spoken by either brother on their entire journey.
“Yes indeed, even if it might take a little charming and persuasion on our part,” answered Flim.
The two brothers jumped off their wagon, walked down towards the farmhouse's door, the path adorned by an array of windflowers, chrysanthemums, gladiolas, and marigolds, showcasing the owners exceptional care for flowers, and knocked gently.
A candle was lighted in the second floor and slowly made its way downstairs to open the door and finally reveal a middle-aged mare with a build and complexion that came from a life of hard and honest work.
Flam immediately took action. “Pardon the intrusion at this late hour, madame, but you see, me and my brother are traveling salesponies, an occupation that unfortunately comes with the burden of seeking shelter from kind strangers. We couldn't help but notice your lovely house while we were passing through, thinking it to be a place of most formidable hospitality, possibly only matched by its inhabitants magnanimity. Thus we implore you to accommodate the two of us for but a single night, since we have nowhere else to go.”
The mare didn't need to think long for an answer. “Of course you two can stay the night. Nopony should have to spend a night out in the open and nopony that knocks on this door will be treated with anything but utmost hospitality.”
“Thank you very much Miss... where are our manners, we haven't even introduced ourselves,” responded Flim. “This is my brother Flam...”
“...and this is my brother Flim,” continued Flam.
“My name is Delve Spade,” said the mare. “I'm afraid I can't offer a you a bed inside our house, since we do not have a guest room. But me and my husband would gladly offer you our barn and its bales of hay for as much comfort as we can provide.” After waiting for a short sign of approval, Mrs. Spade began to lead the way towards said barn.
“Thank you kindly, Mrs. Spade,” thanked Flam. “Unfortunately as much as we would like to repay you for your kindness, I fear we can not, for we are penniless...”
“...destitute...” added Flim.
“...bankrupt...”
“...impecunious...”
“...or flat out broke,” finished Flam.
“Don't you worry, indigent strangers don't need to pay with money. They tend to have other means for retuning a debt,” said Mrs. Spade ominously. Neither brother had time to respond to this, as they had just reached the barn.
“I trust you won't need anything of me or my husband for the night. I will wake you for breakfast then, half an hour after sunrise, if that's okay with you,” Mrs. Spade informed.
“It certainly is. Thank you once again,” responded Flim.
With that Mrs. Spade left the two brothers to their well-deserved night's rest. Within moments both brothers had grabbed three bales of hay and, with the help of two blankets, transformed it into a make-shift bed.
The two of them were simply too tired to do anything but lie down on their beds and let the events of the day wash away over a good night's sleep. Yet they were still somewhat restless, still processing all that had happened to them that day.
“Brother?” asked Flim suddenly.
“Yes, brother?” returned Flam.
“Do you think we will ever catch a break? Do you think we will finally make it one day? Maybe even soon?”
Flam simply smiled at him. “Of course we will. With our wit and intelligence and salesponyship we are bound to make it one day. Never forget: another town's another opportunity for a salespony nonpareil.”
“Yeah, you're right.” Flim nevertheless couldn't help but to continue pondering over this question. Still he wished: “Good night, Flam.”
“Good night, Flim.”
And eventually, they both drifted off to sleep.
† † † † †
Flim was suddenly awoken in the middle of the night (he had no means of telling the exact time) by a persistent tapping on the barn door. His brother seemed blissfully unaware of the noise, continuing his slumber, but the noise prevented him from going back to sleep himself. With his patience thin to begin with, he went outside to check what the ruckus was about.
Outside, he thought he found the source of the sound, although it had suddenly ceased once he had left the barn. He found a pony standing out in the open almost indistinguishable from the dark night, were it not for his fire-red, luminous mane.
“Excuse me, Mr. Spade as I assume, but were you causing that tedious noise? Because I'm afraid it keeps me out of bed,” said Flim to the stranger.
The stranger didn't say anything and simply walked off slowly into the night, his mane clearly leading the way for Flim, who was somewhat enthralled to follow him, though he couldn't say why.
He tried catching up to the stranger, but despite the latter's slow trot Flim found that he couldn't. No matter how fast he went, even when he outright galloped at full pace, he couldn't get any closer to his forerunner, the stranger remained just out of reach, just close enough that Flim would think he could make up ground.
Suddenly they stopped once they reached an abandoned well, a landmark out in the open with nothing in any direction. Over there, the stranger suddenly turned around, his bright yellowy eyes, especially standing out from his ashen coat staring straight at Flim, but the stranger still remained tacit.
“Now, good Sir,” started Flim, “I don't know why I followed you throughout this dark night, but I now demand to know what is going on and how you were connected to that impeccable noise.”
“I can provide you with much more than that, Flim,” responded the stranger.
Flim's face turned as white as a sheet. “Who are you, and how do you know my name?”
“You can call me Silver Tongue,” said the stranger, a name matching the graphic depiction on his flank that was his cutie mark. “You could say that I'm an attorney of some sorts, specializing in cases of extraordinary magnitude and utmost injustice.”
“Which would mean?”
“I help ponies who have been denied justice by life itself getting their due. Ponies like you, to be exact.”
“Ponies like me?” Flim was confused by this, but still intrigued. “Why exactly me? And what exactly can you offer?”
“Why I wouldn't know anypony more deserving of a break in their lives than you, Flim. All that hard work you put into your machines to improve the lives of ponies all around, to give them a break from the quarrels of their strenuous work, and it still misfires, whenever your brother and you come around to demonstrate it. Nopony ever had your back and I'm about to change that.”
Since Flim didn't say anything, Silver Tongue simply continued: “What I can offer you is the deal of a lifetime. The unlimited opportunity to make all your heart's desires come true, be it money, fortune, or fame, or all of the above.”
Flim didn't think about it for too long. “I consider that extremely hard to believe.”
“Then apparently, I'm wasting my time. Have a good night, Flim,” said Silver Tongue, getting ready to leave.
Flim suddenly panicked at the thought of such an opportunity missed. “Wait! I said hard to believe, not impossible to believe. But I have to ask: Let's say I were to respond to your offer, what would be the catch?”
Silver Tongue smiled fiendishly. “No catch, my dear friend. It is but a simple trade between you and I.”
“What could I possibly provide you with that you could want?”
“Oh, it's just a tiny thing, more of a formality, something you would never notice if it went missing. I don't do any of this to make a profit, you know, I do it out of the kindness of my heart. I do it because you deserve this.”
Flim was slowly growing anxious. “Well, what is it?”
Silver Tongue continued his elaborate speech: “You see, I've grown to be an accumulator of special other-worldly possessions, things that, while unassuming and worthless on their own, but quite precious to the dedicated collector, things not unlike a pony's vitality. And I've happened to notice that your brother and you have particularly fine specimens.”
Silver Tongue's implications suddenly dawned on Flim. “You... you want my soul.”
Silver Tongue smiled even more broadly. “That would be one way to put it.”
“That is completely out of the question. No deal!”
“You might have misunderstood me, my friend. Not any of yours is what I desire, but your brother's. Think about it: everlasting fortune for you and all possible consequences for your brother.”
Flim was outraged by this. “That's even worse, much worse even. I could never do this to my brother. You are insane to even suggest such a thing.”
Silver Tongue's grin never ceased. “Am I? Maybe there are things you don't know, things that might persuade you otherwise.”
† † † † †
Flam suddenly cast up his eyes. He immediately felt wide awake, despite a strong desire to keep lying in bed. He looked around the barn, but it took his brain a couple of moments to take in all the information and find the two things that didn't fit the picture: First, his brother was gone. Second, there was a strange stallion standing halfway between his bed and the door. The stranger's ashen complexion made him almost invisible, were it not for the bright red color of his mane that seemed to illuminate the room for him.
“Who are you? What do you want and what have you done to my brother?” shouted Flam at the stranger.
At his words the stranger turned around and with his bright yellowy eyes staring down on Flam he began to speak: “My aren't we nosy? But alas, it is only natural for you to have many questions, Flam. Firstly, your brother went outside for an evening stroll, for matters that needn't concern you, yet. I took the chance to talk to you in private, for the matters we are about to discuss are rather personal and not meant for other ears. To answer your other questions: My name is Silver Tongue and you could call me an entrepreneur or a salespony of some sort, specialized in rare services and scarce artifacts.”
“A salespony like me? Now that is both, odd and interesting? What does another salespony want from me?”
Silver Tongue laughed at his words. “Well I'm not exactly a salespony quite like you. Nopony is a salespony quite like you. Unlike your, let's say 'mixed results', I would deem myself pretty successful within my particular domain, with an unrivaled amount of prolific sales. I'm particularly confident that our deal will be just as fruitful. It's a once in a lifetime opportunity.”
Part of Flam felt offended at Silver Tongue's air of condensation, but a bigger part of him was busy to control the curiosity about the offer Silver Tongue had hinted at.
“So, what's this 'once in a lifetime opportunity'?”
“Anything you can dream of. That is what it is. You can have all the money in Equestria, become even more famous than the Princesses themselves, or simply advance your career by obtaining proficiencies in salesponyship that, I daresay, match my own.”
Now it was Flam's turn to laugh. “They might not be as good as you think. I'm afraid I've been a salespony for far too long to fall for such an obvious ruse.”
Silver Tongue countered this with the widest of grins. “Please, Flam, you insult me. My offer is as decent as it gets, I can and will provide you with everything I have promised you and that for almost nothing of charge.”
“Even if you could provide me with your end of the bargain, I couldn't possibly provide you with anything in return. If this deal were sincere, what's in it for you?”
“Ah, that is indeed a very good question, I made a good choice by applying to such a clever pony as you are.” Silver Tongue turned around and started to gesture elegantly. “I have something you desire and you have something I seek, and the marvelous thing about is that the two of us have a surplus of what the other wants. Now, I have told you about what I can provide, but what you hold is no less valuable. What I ask of you is, what you could call, in layman's terms, your spirit, your vigor, your peppiness if you will.” By the end he had turned back to face Flam.
Flam giggled. “It's almost as if you're talking about my...” The joy faded from his voice when the plausibility of his suggestion hit him. “...soul. That's insane I would never agree to this.”
Silver Tongue's confidence didn't falter in the slightest. “Well you deem these terms unacceptable, perhaps I can meet you halfway. I could do if you provide me with your brother's instead of what I have asked of you.”
Flam burst with anger. “Selling my brother's soul instead of mine? That's downright atrocious. I'd have to be a monster to even think about it.”
Silver Tongue simply fell back to his fiendish grin. “I see you can't be tempted so easily. How admirable of you. And foolish. There's more to all this than you think.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean that there is something else you have to take into account. And that, my dear Flam, is your brother. He has been offered the same arrangement, and I don't think I have to further elaborate why this deal has a first-come first-served basis.”
Flam's rage hadn't yet faded. “That changes nothing! I'm a hundred percent certain he declined your offer just like I did. That you stand here in the first place, is more than proof enough.”
“Are you sure you can trust him that much?” asked Silver Tongue.
“I would trust him with my life!”
“But would you trust him with your soul?”
These words hit Flam hard; they stuck themselves heavily onto that spark of doubt, that one ridiculous thought he couldn't shake out of his mind, no matter how hard he tried and soon all their weight sunk down right into his heart rendering him incapable of speaking.
“Can you really be sure that he harbors no ill-will against you? What about the time in Ponyville? Wasn't it you who increased the suction of your machine and deactivated the quality control? Isn't that what you always do? Don't you always aggravate problems by trying to fix them, problems your brother had pointed out to you beforehand?
“And what about you? Can you honestly say that there is resentment on your side towards your brother? Isn't it him who always ruins the deal by pitching an offer that is way too low? How many deals has he ruined by pushing your luck? A dozen? Maybe two? Maybe all? And what about your 'life in the Fast Lane'?”
Flam opened his mouth to protest but no words would come out. Everything just sunk back in by the weight of his doubts. Finally, he was able to stammer something, although it wasn't what he had wanted to say: “It can't be.. it just can't be that bad between us.”
Silver Tongue meanwhile had walked to the other side of the barn and acted as if he had lost any interest in the deal. “You don't have to decide right away, I will give you time until sunrise. But remember, all is for naught if your brother accepts first.”
Immediately after Silver Tongue had spoken these words, the barn door opened with Flim entering, naturally drawing Flam's attention to the door. When Flam turned around to check on Silver Tongue, he realized that the stallion was gone, vanished into thin air. With nothing else to do, his attention shifted back toward his brother.
“Well, brother of mine, it seems like you're suffering from a tidbit of insomnia.” A desperate smile crept on Flam's face as he spoke. “Is there anything I can do to help you? Maybe ask Mrs. Spade for a glass of milk?”
Flim met his brother with a similar face. “Thank you, brother of mine, but I'm quite alright. I think I walked it off on a nightly stroll. I'm sorry if I've woken you up.” In a single motion that seemed almost natural, he turned his bed around, so that once he lay down on it, which was the next thing he did, the two brothers were facing each other.
The awkward silence grew, as both brothers were far too nervous to break it. It was Flam who finally dared to talk.
“Say, Flim, do you remember the lemonade stand we ran as colts? With that little magical squeeze we built ourselves, the one we could barely manage to work?” said he.
“Of course I remember. It was our very first business after all,” answered Flim.
“Back then, things seemed so much simpler and so much more fun. I kind of miss those days, when we would just stand about all day, with not a worry in the world, just glasses of lemonade to sell.”
“I know where you're coming from. I miss those days as well. But we were just colts after all. In the end it was literally all fun and games.”
“Well, it wasn't all fun and games. We ran into some serious, grave, pivotal minor problems. Like the time we splashed lemonade in Mr. Fields' face. His face was priceless.” The two brothers chuckled at the memory.
“He was so incredibly mad, I can't believe ma and pa got us off the hook. I mean those were his lemons after all,” said Flim.
“Well, ma and pa made us give them back. I don't even want to know what he did with those lemons afterward. That old stallion was plain weird.”
“And after that we still had to deal with our lemon shortage. Maybe we shouldn't have watered down our lemonade as much.”
“What else were we supposed to do? You remember what happened when we tried to use lemon leaves instead, because they were 'essentially the same thing'. The color was completely off and don't even get me started on the taste.”
Flim and Flam were now completely immersed in the fondness of their memories. “Yes, that stuff was really awful, I can't believe we actually got somepony to drink it. You couldn't have paid me to do that.”
“Well, non of them stayed for a second glass,” Flam giggled. “All of it only worked because of the sales pitches we thought up.”
“Like the one where we handed out coupons for a free cup that couldn't be validated until the day after. Those probably did much more harm than good, I mean who would put up with that,” figured Flim.
“I don't know,” opposed Flam, “I think it was a pretty neat idea.”
“Are you kidding me? I had half a dozen ponies throw cups at me after I told them.”
Flam turned a little cross. “I'm sure it would have worked if it hadn't been for you pressuring our customers into buying on the spot, telling them things like there would probably not be any lemonade left by then.”
“Me?” Flim was shocked at the sudden accusation. “Are you honestly suggesting it was me who ruined the business.”
“Quite frankly, I do.”
Now Flim also started to lose his temper. “Now hold it. The entire lemonade stand was your idea and if I wouldn't have come to help you...”
“You hadn't been any help at all. If it weren't for you, the lemonade stand would be thriving to this day!”
“Thriving? You have to be kidding me? When I joined the entire stand had been a mess, with cups flying around everywhere!”
“Like you really changed anything! Let's be honest, brother, you couldn't even work the lemon squeeze with your feeble little magic.”
“At least I wasn't clumsy enough to drop half our lemons in the dirt, brother. That's why we had a shortage in the first place!”
Both brothers were now fully worked up. They both jumped out of bed and started glaring at each other. “It was only because you distracted me, with that horrible paint job! But you wouldn't know about that, because you were always unable to follow the simplest instructions, like painting our sign in yellow!”
“Yellow was a horrible color!” shouted Flim. “And whenever we failed with anything it was always due to your horrid designs! I kept telling you about the overheating of the walnut grinder, but you told me it wouldn't be a problem. You didn't listen, you never did and I always had to suffer the consequences!”
“The designs and the machines had never been the problem!” shouted Flam right back. “Every prototype is bound to encounter a few errors; they are not important to the final product. It was always the sales were you blew it. No matter if we were talking to simply farm ponies or business moguls, you always demanded everything for us and were never willing to give anything away. You should know by now, that traveling salesponies don't have enough time to work out the best deals. Sometimes you have to take what you can get!”
“Maybe I didn't want to be a traveling salespony. Maybe that was only your crazy dream. Maybe all I wanted to do is to settle down in a quiet little town and run my own shop. But no, you always had to grab me along for your ridiculous sales! You were the one to ruin my life!”
“You want to make this personal, brother, do you? Well what about Fast Lane? She was the love of my life and you put her off! You told me it would be a good idea to let her stay, you practically forbid me to take her along with us! You told me she would wait for me until we would happen to come back, but when we finally got back she had already up and left with another stallion. I didn't ruin your life, you ruined mine!”
Both brothers were fuming. “You are the bane of my existence! My whole life would have been better without you! You can go to hell for all I care!” Flim grabbed a pitchfork with his magic arming himself and started circling his brother, eying his every move
Flam followed suit, but with a rake instead. “The same goes to you. You have been nothing but a burden on me! It would be the happiest day of my life if I were to never see you again!”
And with nothing left to say to each other, they gave vent to their anger.
† † † † †
Mrs. Spade rose at cockcrow, just like any other day. Like any other day, she combed her mane, and after giving herself a catlick, she went downstairs to prepare breakfast.
Once the breakfast was properly prepared, with an assortment of bread, butter, milk and various fruits, some of which squeezed into juice, she remembered why this day was out of the ordinary and she quickly decided to check on the two strangers she had allowed to spend the night.
When she left her house, Mrs. Spade promptly noticed that the strange contraption the brothers must have used as a vehicle, wasn't parked at the roadside, only leaving wheel tracks where it once had stood, which of course seemed a bit odd. But what she would find inside the barn would prove to be even more odd.
Mrs. Spade slowly opened the barn door and peaked inside. She wanted to call out for the two brothers, but she immediately figured it was of no use. They were evidently not inside the barn. In fact, there wasn't any trace of them left, not a single clue that showed anypony had been inside the barn for the entire night's duration. All the bales of hay and all the gardening tools were in the exact same spot she had left them when she had closed the door the night before. She couldn't think of any reason the two brothers hadn't at least attempted to make a bed.
Mrs. Spade left the barn and closed the door behind her. She thought about all the events that could have possibly transpired, some reasonable explanation to the strangers' whereabouts. She figured that maybe they had chosen not to spend the night after all. Maybe they had remembered some urgent business something that couldn't wait until tomorrow. Or maybe they just had to get away from it all. Yes, maybe they simply got away, thought Mrs. Spade.
She didn't have any more time to ponder about this, as breakfast awaited her husband and her, and after that there would be plenty of chores that needed to be done to get the farm ready for winter.
