For Friendship, You Monsterby groxChaptersFor Friendship, You MonsterThe Cold HoofThe ReturnChapter of ChattingAn Aperture Adventure (1/2)An Aperture Adventure (2/2)The Cake Is A LieFor Friendship, You MonsterChapter One: For Friendship, You Monster It was a sunny day in Ponyville. When wasn't it sunny in Ponyville? Anyway, Pinkie Pie, Applejack, Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy were walking to the Carousel Boutique to meet Rarity. Twilight Sparkle, on the other hoof, was going to Zecora for some ingredients for a potion. Twilight was walking through the Everfree forest when she heard a noise in the bushes. She trotted to it and looked inside the bush. She saw a book. The cover read Binary and Other Codes, Written by Professor Griswold. When she wanted to levitate the book, Twilight saw that it had a string attached to it. She curiously pulled the rope with her magic. There was a click, and suddenly a big net rose up from the ground and trapped Twilight. She was now hanging in a tree and unable to move. Two unicorns appeared and dropped her back down on the ground. "HEY, WHO ARE YOU?!" Screamed Twilight. The two ponies didn’t respond and started to drag her into the forest. ^----- When the five friends arrived at the Carousel Boutique, Pinkie started shaking. "What is it?" Asked Rainbow Dash. "Pinkie Sense." She said. "I think there is something wrong." "Wrong with what?" Fluttershy said. "I don’t know. But nothing's falling on us." Said Pinkie. "Perhaps there is something wrong with Twilight." Rarity added. "She told me she wanted to get some things from Zecora. Now don’t worry, maybe she just stopped to drink some tea with her." "But Pinkie's Pinkie Sense is going off." Said Rainbow Dash. "That always means that there is something wrong." "And do you remember the last time Twilight went into the Everfree forest?" Fluttershy reminded them. "She was turned into stone by a cockatrice." "We have to go to Zecora’s place to see if there is somthing wrong with Twilight!" Yelled Rarity. "Maybe we should ask Spike if he wants to come with us." -^--- When the ponies finally stopped dragging Twilight, they where standing in front of a small shack covered with vines and other plants. One of the ponies used a digital key to open the shack. The door opened and an elevator appeared. They started to drag Twilight in. "WHO ARE YOU AND WHERE ARE YOU TAKING ME?!" Screamed Twilight. "Please just shut up!" Growled one of the ponies. He kicked Twilight in her face. She passed out. --^-- When the five friends arrived at the library Spike was arranging books. "Oh, hi girls. How're you doing?" Asked Spike. "Have you seen Twilight?" The ponies all asked at the same time. "Twilight just went to get some ingredients from Zecora. Why?" "Well," said Pinkie, "on the way to Rarity’s house my tail began to twitch again and we think there is something wrong with Twilight." "And we wanted you to come with us to see if everything is alright with Twi." Added Applejack with a soft smile. "Okay," said Spike, "but where are we going to look for Twilight?" "First we'll check to see if she’s with Zecora." Said Rainbow Dash. "So we can ask if she has seen Twilight or if she’s still there." "I could send a letter to the Princess." "Later." ^--^- Twilight woke up strapped to an operation table. Three ponies where checking medical devices around her. "Hey! Let me go!" said Twilight. "Nein, I am afraid we can’t do that." Said a dark green pony with a slight German accent. "WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO WITH ME?!" She screamed. "Oh, you will see." The green pony said. "WHO ARE YOU?!" "Ich bint doctor Ununpentium and these ponies are my assistants, Doctor Shuster und Doctor Maxis." "I DON’T CARE! LET ME GO!" "Now don’t be rude. I’ve answered your questions." Dr. Ununpentium said. "Well, it doesn't matter anymore. It’s time to take a nap." Dr. Maxis injected something into Twilight and she instantly felt drowsy. The last thing she heard was Dr Shuster saying; "Let's go practice medicine." -^--^ The five ponies and Spike were rushing to Zecora’s hut. When they arrived Zecora saw them. "Well, hello my dear friends. What brings you here so tense?" "Have you seen Twilight?" Asked Rainbow Dash. "I have not seen the mare you seek, but maybe here you can take a peek." The friends followed Zecora inside her hut. She gave Fluttershy a small stone. It was black and it had an arrow carved into it. "What does it do?" Asked Fluttershy. "It helps you find that what is lost, but it will only do it at a cost." "So we have to give that stone some bits?" Applejack said. "No, you silly filly!" Interrupted Pinkie as she strapped a necklace around the stone. It began to levitate. "That was my favorite necklace!" Pinkie smiled. "Thank you, Zecora." Said Rainbow Dash. Zecora smiled. And the six friends followed the stone outside. --^-- "Shuster, is ze system ready?" "Yes." Said Dr. Shuster calmly. "Maxis, redirect ze power to the mainframe." "Already done," he said. "Good." Dr Ununpentium smiled and he pushed a button. "Power up initiated." Said a soft friendly male computer voice. "Starting up Operating System: Genetic Life form And Disc Operating System………….. Power up completed. Connecting to genetic life form………….. Interface completed." Twilight woke up. She felt kind of weird. She saw the three ponies standing in front of some computer and she saw ones and zeros flying across a screen. She couldn’t control herself. It felt like another being had taken control over her body. She tried to talk but not even a sound came out. She felt helpless. ^--^- Fluttershy and the others followed the locator stone, walking deep into the Everfree Forest. After a few hours of walking the stone stopped in front of a small shack. "Well, how are we going to open this?" Asked Applejack. "I have a idea!" Shouted Rainbow Dash while she flew up into the air. "I think we best get out the way." Applejack said. While Rainbow dash flew down, the others ran away to hide behind the trees. They heard a giant explosion when Rainbow Dash collided with the ground. A giant rainbow mushroom cloud blew away the shack and also all the trees in the blast radius. Rainbow Dash was standing in the crater the explosion created with her sunglasses on. "And that is my newest move - the Atomic Rainboom." She explained. The shack was blown to pieces and the 6 friends jumped inside the hole that was made for an elevator. "That was one heck of a BOOM!" Said Pinkie Pie happily while falling into the dark. -^--^ When Twilight realized she couldn't do anything, she heard a voice she didn’t recognize. It sounded just like her voice... but more metallic. And it was coming out of her mouth. "Intruder alert! Intruder alert! Unauthorized personnel detected!" "WHAT!" Dr. Ununpentium said. "Where?" "Unauthorized personnel detected at surface entrance." Twilight said. She was confused. I didn’t want to say that. Twilight thought. "Maxis, Shuster, take care of those intruders." Dr. Ununpentium commanded. Shuster and Maxis each grabbed a raygun with their magic and they trotted through the corridor. --^-- Rainbow Dash was flying through the big white corridor with Spike on her back. Applejack, Fluttershy, Rarity and Pinkie Pie followed Rainbow Dash. Rarity was the first to see the two armed ponies. "HOOVES UP!" Yelled Dr. Maxis. Rainbow Dash descended to the ground. "Now come with me." Said Dr. Shuster, pointing the red raygun at the 5 ponies. And they trotted away between the two hostile ponies. ^--^- When they arrived at the main chamber with Dr. Ununpentium and Twilight Sparkle, Spike saw Twilight standing high in the middle of the room on a metal pillar. But there was something different about Twilight. She had metal parts on her body like a robot. Her left fore and hind hooves were half-replaced with robotic parts. She had a metal chest plate and a metal helmet that covert the left half of her head. Her left eye was replaced with a big red camera. There were wires hanging from the ceiling that connected to her. Twilight looked down. "Spike, is that you?" "Who are you?" Dr. Ununpentium said. "We are going to free Twilight!" Said Rainbow Dash angrily. "Oh, I don’t think so." Said Dr. Ununpentium. "I am afraid Twilight is mine now." He smiled. "What have you done to her!" Rainbow Dash screamed. "We made her into a central core processor for this ancient super computer we found in this underground building." "Ya’ll can’t just pick some random pony from the road and turn her into this…this…THING!" Applejack said. "We didn’t just pick 'some random pony from the road'. We’ve chosen her for a reason. But I won't tell anything else... because that would spoil ze fun." He laughed. -^--^ When Twilight saw her friends she felt The Spark, the same one she felt when she battled Nightmare Moon. She used all her magic to push away the entity that was controlling her. Twilight was finally in control of her body again. "Run! Run away! I can’t hold this any longer! RUN!!!" She yelled. "But... we can’t just leave you here!" Exclaimed Pinkie. "They will kill you if you don’t leave me here!" Twilight yelled. "For real, Pinkie!" Spike set fire to the lab coats that Dr. Maxis and Shuster wore. Now that the armed ponies were distracted the 5 friends ran away and they left Twilight behind. "Find them!" Commanded Dr. Ununpentium. "And bring zhem here!" --^-- The 5 friends were running through a random corridor. "I think we’ve lost them." Whispered Applejack. "I think so, but... where are we?" Asked Fluttershy. "Well this door says WEAPONS." She said. "Well, let's take a look." Pinkie smiled. "Uuuh... well... I guess it won’t be a harm to get some weapons." Said Applejack, kind of worried about Pinkie's enthusiasm. Pinkie Pie rapidly grabbed a box full of Quantum Entanglement Devices. Rainbow Dash picked up a wave gun. Fluttershy found a vr-11. Applejack picked up a wunderwaffe. Rarity picked up some Gersch devices and Spike picked up a 31-79 JGb215. "And now?" Rarity asked. "Well, maybe now we can send the Princess a letter." Spike frowned. "Spike, that’s a good idea!" Said Rainbow Dash. "Maybe you can send the locator stone too!" Spike pulled out his ever-present quill and paper. "Princess help. Twilight ponynapped. Bring elements." Spike wrapped the letter around the stone and sent it away to the Princess. "It's not the next Shakespeare, but it'll do." ^--^- "Activate ze lethal military android defense system. Target all unidentified personnel." Dr. Ununpentium called up to Twilight. The thing that controlled her obeyed and ran a program. She could see through the cameras that hung everywhere in the large facility. Walls opened revealing a large army of turrets. They were set to shoot any unidentified personnel. She wished she could change that. -^--^ The 6 friends were walking through some corridors, waiting for the Princess to arrive when they heard a noise. "There you are." Something said with a friendly female voice. "What the buck is that?" Applejack said. She trotted around the corner and towards the white oval. "Dispensing product." The turret said, beginning to shoot at Applejack. "Whoa whoa whoa! Did that thing just... shoot at me?" She asked. "Apparently." Rarity replied. "So... how do we get rid of that shooting thingy?" Asked Rainbow Dash. "With style." Rarity answered while priming a Gersh device and throwing it at the turret. The Gersh device activated and created a bright and beautiful purple-pink black hole that sucked up the turret. "No hard feelings!" The turret happily cheered as it got destroyed in the black hole. --^-- The Princess had just returned from royal business when she saw Philomena with a letter in her beak. Mail? From Twilight? She thought. But I already got a friendship report from her two days ago. She opened the scroll with her magic. She read the letter and quickly galloped to the Canterlot towers for the Elements of Harmony. Luna trotted out of her room and saw Celestia rushing out with the Elements. "Hey, 'Tia is there something wrong?" She slurred, half asleep. "Yes," she said, "Spike has sent me a letter telling me that Twilight has been ponynapped." "Twilight? Isn’t that your personal protégé?" "Yes. but I really have to go now. And if I don’t come back, could you raise the sun for me?" "Okay," Luna nodded. Princess Celestia flew away from the caslte in the direction of the Everfree Forest. ^--^- When Celestia flew over the Everfree Forest, she scanned the ground for any unusual things. Somewhere in the distance she saw a big crater on the ground where all the trees where burned. She descended on the ground using the locator stone to find Twilight. The stone led her to the small hole in the ground. I don’t fit in there. She thought. She used a spell shrink herself to the size of a normal pony. She jumped inside the hole, using her wings to slowly fall down into the almost bottomless pit. -^--^ Twilight discovered she could open files and see through cameras. She opened a file; it was a map of the whole facility. It looked like it was located inside a giant salt mine. The date of the file said it was last updated in December 3012. Twilight thought for a moment That must have been thousands of years ago. The system had a bin too. She opened it, and there was a private file named Caroline. She wanted to open it, but it was protected by the being that invaded her body. --^-- The five ponies and Spike were in a hallway. Both exits where guarded by a row of turrets. They hid in a big hole in the ground, probably from some ancient explosion. "How are we going to destroy all those turrets? There are simply too many." Rarity whined. "Stop that, we're not diamond dogs!" Applejack snarled. Hoisting her weapon of choice, Applejack aimed at the turrets. "Well this should do. I don’t know what this thing does, but I guess it should do the job." She pulled the trigger. The weapon fired a big ball of electricity. When it touched the turret it exploded, and the electricity arced in every direction; to another turret and another and another until all the turrets were destroyed. "Wow, didn’t see that coming." Applejack laughed in amazement. ^--^- "Boss, we didn't find the intruders." Dr. Shuster said. "Yeah, they are moving too fast and you know that this is a huge place after all." Dr. Maxis said. "I know zhat, but I don’t think zey will get out of here alive. I have commanded the computer to set up turrets by each and every entrance and exit. So, Dr. Maxis, how is our test subject doing?" Dr Ununpentium asked. "Uuuh... well..." Dr. Maxis stuttered, "she’s been browsing through some non-protected files, and she's adapting very fast. I hope she doesn't hack the firewall or she could turn of the autopilot of that big computer thingy." "It's not a big computer thingy." Dr. Shuster said proudly. "It’s a super computer designed to run this entire building." "Well, you’re the computer expert. I'm just a plain old biomechanics engineer." Dr. Maxis drawled sarcastically. "Oh, shuzzle your muzzles, you two! I have better thinz to do than listen to you two!" Said Dr. Ununpentium angrily. -^--^ Celestia trotted through the hallways of the facility, still using the locator spell to find Twilight. After a while of walking and knocking over turrets, the locator stone stopped hovering in front of a door. It read MAIN AI ROOM. Celestia magically opened the door and trotted in. It was a big circular room. The ceiling was domed, and in the middle there was a massive body made out of metal and wires. At the end there were wires that connected to a certain lavender unicorn. Celestia trotted closer to her. "Twilight, my faithful student, are…are you okay?" Twilight didn’t respond. --^-- When Twilight saw Celestia she was so happy she could explode……….twice. Celestia had tried to talk to Twilight but she quickly realized she couldn’t talk. Then Celestia walked away reassuring she would come back. ^--^- Twilight started to understand how the computer worked, and tried to hack the firewall. After some time she was able to control some minor functions of the facility. She could move plates open or lock doors, and even talk through a specific speaker. Twilight located her friends and started talking to them. -^--^ "Hey girls. And Spike." "WHAT WAS THAT WHO WAS THAT SHOW YOURSELF!?" Rainbow Dash yelled, startled. "It's me, Twilight Sparkle. I'm speaking through a speaker. Princes Celestia has found me but was unable to help me. She has the Elements of Harmony and is probably looking for you. I can make a path for you that leads to the place where Celestia is located now." A wall opened, and plates slid out of the sides, creating a long walkway. "Follow the path and you will find her, now don’t look or fall down here because it’s a long drop." The speaker crackled once and went silent. --^-- "I hope she knows what she’s doing." Fluttershy said. "There is nothing to be afraid of my dear, you know Twilight. She always knows what she’s doing." Rarity responded to calm Fluttershy down. Spike and the five ponies trotted further into the walkway. When they were at the end of the hallway, they saw Princess Celestia. She was hiding behind a magical shield. She was protecting herself from turrets that shot missiles. Normally she could get shot by the normal turrets, but those missiles were just too much. ^--^- Luna was worried. Celestia hadn’t come home and it was almost time for her sister to raise the sun. But she had never moved the sun, only the moon. When it was time, Luna trotted to her sister's balcony and focused her magic on the moon to lower it. That seemed easy... but the sun is so much larger than the moon. With the moon slowly descending under the horizon she began to focus her magic to the sun, moving them both so the two celestial bodies moved in synchronized speed. When the sun was half up and the moon half down, Luna couldn’t handle it anymore. She passed out, leaving the sun and the moon halfway through their travels. -^--^ "Uh, Dr. Pentium?" Dr. Maxis stuttered. "What, Maxis? I'm in the middle of a critical test." "We have a royal visitor." "What zho you mean?" "Well, I mean that Princess Celestia just walked in." "She just... walked in?" Dr. Ununpentium questioned. "Well... yes." Maxis answered. "AND WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO ABOUT IT?!" He screamed. Maxis winced. "Turrets that shoot bullets don’t harm her, but I have discovered that the ones with the missiles can hurt an alicorn." Maxis answered. "Good. Deploy as many rocket turrets as possible." "I will do it right away." Dr. Maxis smiled. --^-- When the guards switched, one of the Lunar guards saw Luna passed out on the ground. She was lying on the floor near the balcony, covered in sweat. The Lunar guard tried to wake her up. "Luna? LUNA! Are you okay?" The guard questioned while shaking her shoulders. "We…what…what happened?" "You passed out on the floor." The guard answered. "And you didn’t really finish the job." "Oh….oh yeah... I need to raise the sun." She said, still tired. "No, you need to rest. The sun and the moon can wait." "I….I think you're right. and Luna trotted to her own room to lie down. She fell asleep. ^--^- Celestia, Spike and the five friends walked through the corridor that leaded to the main AI chamber. They kept walking, but when they were almost at the door to the chamber the walls opened and revealed a row of missile turrets. They all pointed their laser pointers at the group of ponies. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP When the turrets all locket on their target they fired a dozen of rockets. The group of ponies could easily avoid the rockets. Spike grabbed his 31-79 JGb215 from behind a wall. He shot a turret and an incoming missile. The strange-looking device shot an invincible beam of energy that warped the light around it. It hit the turret and the rocket and they both shrank to the size of toys. Spike repeated the shrinking process until all the turrets were half their size and where shooting tiny little bullets. They couldn’t even hurt Flutershy. -^--^ Twilight saw the group of ponies that wanted to save her. She unlocked the door to the AI chamber, and they walked in. "Twilight, are you okay?" The Princess asked. "Yes, I'm fine." She replied through a speaker. "Oh…oh! I'm sooooooooo happy you're fine!" Said Pinkie Pie while bouncing through they air. "So, do you know how we can uh…save you?" Rainbow Dash said. "Yes." Twilight said. "You must use the Elements of Harmony on me." "But you’re the Element of Magic we need ya we can’t just do it-" "I will take your place, Twilight." Celestia said, interrupting Applejack. "But how?" Fluttershy asked. "I am also the Element of Magic. Now, stand in position!" Celestia commanded while giving everypony their element. They were standing in position while they activated the elements. They began to float into the air and Celestia’s eyes began to glow. A big, beautiful rainbow erupted from the group of ponies. --^-- When the rainbow reached Twilight, it began to burn away the entity that controlled her body. When the smoke and the rainbow faded away, Celestia saw her student smiling with joy. She wanted to hug the Princess, but when she tried run to her she remembered that she was still attached to the big computer. "You…you saved me." Twilight said. "Ah, no thanks needed. T'was the least we could do." Applejack said. "So you can control this big building, right?" Pinkie Pie smiled. "Well, yes, because you destroyed the autopilot that controlled me and the facility. I'm in full control of this building." Twilight said while lowering an escape lift. "This is your ride home." "But, we don’t fit in that lift all together!" Rarity said. "I know," Twilight replied, "but if three ponies go, then another three, and then me and Celestia, that'll work." ^--^- The first ponies that went back up to the surface were Applejack, Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy. When they were at the surface the lift descended and picked up Rarity, Spike and Rainbow Dash. When the elevator was down again for the final time, ready to pick up the Princess and Twilight, Dr. Ununpentium and his two companions walked in. "Well..well..well. Look what we have here." Dr. Ununpentium said. "I see that you're in control now, Twilight." She gave the doctor an angry glare. "Oh, don’t look at me like that. I know you don’t mean it." He chuckled. "Oh, but I mean it." Twilight hissed. "I'm going to kill you, and throw into the incinerator." The light of the room went a little bit down and some light on the metal body glowed a creepy crimson. "Or... am I going to throw you first into the incinerator then kill you?" Twilight said, her voice steadily growing more robotic. Celestia stepped backwards a bit from shock. "Twi…Twilight! This isn’t you anymore! What happened?!" "Oh, it's nothing." Twilight sighed, her gaze sarcastically softening. "It's just REVENGE. Everypony likes revenge. So, let's have some." Twilight smiled. "Now, please Celestia, excuse me. I am just need a few minutes. I'm going to throw some ponies into a big pit of melted metal." Three metal claws came out of the ceiling, swiftly grabbing Dr. Maxis, Dr. Shuster and Dr. Ununpentium. "STOP!" Celestia yelled, this being one of the rare Canterlot Voice occasions. "This is not the Twilight Sparkle who I know and love. The real Twilight Sparkle would never kill somepony for stupid revenge!" Twilight looked at Celestia and released Dr. Ununpentium. He fell on the floor with a slam. He stood up, and grabbed a little box with a big red button. He pressed it and a big, black bell-like device rose up from the ground. He galloped to it and activated it. Standing in the device, he commanded; "By…By am going to Der Reise." Big arcs of lighting covered him, and with a lot of noise he disappeared. -^--^ "Central core corrupted at 20%" "Heh, heh." Twilight chuckled. "Quite funny, actually. I don’t feel corrupt." Twilight opened the incinerator hole and moved the two ponies towards it. "Maybe I can’t kill your leader, but I can certainly kill you." Twilight smiled creepily from ear to ear. "No no no no no noooooooooooooooooooooooo!" Dr. Maxis screamed, while Twilight dropped him into the incinerator. When Twilight wanted to drop Dr. Shuster he pleaded for her to stop. "Please! If you're going to kill me tell my foals that I love them and tell my wife that I love her!" He began to cry. Twilight paused for a moment, taunting freedom, before she opened the incinerator and dropped him. "Central core corrupted at 90%" "And for you, Celestia," Twilight grinned, "I have a surprise for you. We are are going to test and test until one of us drops dead." A trapdoor opened underneath Celestia. She fell inside, too startled to use her wings. She landed in a small glass room with nothing more than a bed and a toilet. "Central core corrupted at 100%" The Cold Hoof-Chapter Two: The Cold Hoof Celestia woke up from a dreamless slumber. She found herself in a small glass square room with a bed and a toilet and wearing an - itchy - orange jumpsuit. "You have been in suspension for -2 weeks-." The announcer said. "Ah, you're awake." Said the metallic voice of Twilight Sparkle. "You are ready to begin the testing." "Where am I, and why did I sleep so long?" Celestia said, with a slight hint of anger. She tried her hardest to pull the sleeves on her front legs up, even if the burning fabric simply dug deeper into her shoulders. "You are at the Aperture Science Enrichment Center." Twilight replied smugly. "And you had to sleep so long because... well, to be honest, I needed to clean all those test chambers - skeletons left over, you know - because everything needs to be," her voice caught a little over the speaker, almost hauntingly, "p-p-p-p-p-perfect." The speaker went silent with a small beep. The announcer spoke again. "The portal will open in 3...2...1." An orange portal appeared on the wall with a short fizzle. Celestia carefully examined the odd portal. She lifted a hoof, slowly going through. Once she knew that the portal was safe, she walked through it. Twilight spoke again. "Please, follow my voice to the first test chamber. And sorry about the jumpsuit. It looks... well, not that horrible on you. The facility's been down for a while, and I really don't know the environment in half of them. So... if you're dropped into a sub-arctic wasteland with turrets in it, roll down your sleeves." Celestia nervously trotted after the crackling speakers down the tunnel. "This is our first test. Cube and button tests are the simplest tests. Please, put the Aperture Science Weighted Storage Cube on The 1500 Megawatt Aperture Science Heavy Duty Super-Colliding Super Button." The sarcastic speaker went silent again. Celestia tried to levitate the cube on the button, but the box didn't shift. "Why isn't my magic working?!" Celestia yelled up at everfollowing camera. "Oh, yes. I forgot to tell you every test chamber has a magic dampening field. Try levitating the cube at closer range." Twilight snickered back. Celestia trotted up to the cube and levitated it over the button, recieving a satisfying clunk when it dropped. A door opened. "Good. You have mastered the easiest test. Could have been a bit faster, but this isn't a time trial." Twilight drawled sarcastically. "Just wasting your life. Please move to the chamberlock after completing each test." Celestia trotted through the emancipation grill and up to the elevator. After waiting for the shaft to clear out all of the debris, she stepped in. ^---- While Celestia was waiting in the elevator, Twilight rebooted the internal speaker. "You are a horrible pony. That's what it says. We weren't even testing for that." Celestia flattened her ears and surpressed a growl. -^--- Celestia stepped out of the elevator, immediately being greeted by the cold and emotionless voice of Twilight. "This next test contains Thermal Discouragement Beams and Weighted Pivot Cubes." The Sun Princess walked into the second test chamber, seeing a small cube sided with glass and a big, dangerous-looking laser. "What is the purpose of these devices?" She asked calmly. "I designed this test chamber to see how test subjects react when locked in a room with deadly lasers." "Well, I don't exactly see how that answers my question." Celestia muttered while levitating the Pivot Cube to the laser. She easily redirected the laser through a round hole in the wall. The door to the elevator opened. Celestia waited for the elevator to come down before she stepped in. Twilight spoke again. "You know, I want to apologize for that horrible pony thing, so I'm going to put something nice in your file, just in case somepony ever reads it. Did well. Done." Celestia was now really getting depressed from Twilight's constant disapproval. --^-- The elevator stopped and the door opened. "This next test contains the Aperture Science Aerial Faith Plates. They act as very powerful trampolines. Oh, I almost forgot. I have a surprise for you at the next test chamber." Twilight said, almost giggling. Celestia walked out of the elevator and into the test chamber. She saw large - and deep - pool of green water, and in the middle a faith plate bouncing a cube up and down. She stepped on the faith plate located before her. It launched her into the air, as it was meant to. She prepare to grab the cube with her magic, but she missed and kept falling. Before hitting the the ground, she automatically unfolded her wings to slow her down, but they didn't seem to be working. When she hit the ground, she collapsed, her legs bending unnaturally. "HELP ME!" She yelled at the camera. "I think I've broken my legs!" "Wait, stay there, don't move." Twilight said, panicking. A long, pointed device came out of the wall next to her, the tip directing towards Celestia's hooves. It began to glow, and Celestia felt her legs heal. "W-what i-is that t-thing?" Celestia stuttered. "It is an artificial unicorn horn. It can emit magic and even perform the most advanced spells." The artificial horn began to glow again, and with a flash it materialized four strange white horseshoes next to Celestia. "Here, put those on. The metal bands will prevent you from breaking your legs. Or anything else." Celestia stood up and stepped in the horseshoes. She jumped on the faith plate, this time timing it so she could grab the cube on her way past. With the cube in her magical grasp, she flung herself to the other side again and put the cube on the button. The door opened and Twilight began to talk again. "You will get your surprise at the next test chamber." Twilight said, again giggling. "Oh...yeah...uh... well done." Celestia walked to the elevator and stepped in. ^--^- Along the way to the next test chamber, Celestia thought of what the surprise might be. For some odd reason, she kept thinking of cake. The elevator stopped in a small office room decorated with ribbons and balloons. In the middle of the room stood a table with a big wrapped present. A big tv screen slid out of the wall. It flickered on with the image of a strange silver - albeit slightly rusted and dark - metal ball with what looked like a big purple-tinted camera for an eye. "SURPRISE!" Twilight cheered, while a single confetti cannon exploded. "What is the meaning of this?!" Celestia yelled. "Who are you?!" "This is my new body. I copied my memory and downloaded it in this personality core." "Where is the real Twilight." Celestia growled angrily. "I am the real Twilight, but if you mean the body, don't worry, she's safe." The screen changed to a large pod that held an almost frozen Twilight. "See? She's completely safe in this Aperture Science Cryogenic Slumber Party Pod." "YOU - you let her go!" Celestia screamed. Twilight ingored her. "You know what's interesting? The technology used in these pods was originally found on the moon. You should ask your sister if she saw a big building while she was-" "You let her go NOW!" Celestia interrupted her, straining not to use the Canterlot Voice again. Twilight zoomed in on the frozen body to taunt the already angry Celestia."Why don't you open your present?" Feeling defeated, Celestia trotted to the table with the present. She used her weakened magic to levitate the present and bite off the paper. Inside was a pale white oval, with three black prongs extending from the sides to almost meet at the tip. It seemed to be important. She lifted it with her magic, trying to figure out how to use it. "Pull the trigger." Twilight drawled. The resulting effect was a small blue ball shooting out of the tip, between the prongs, and smacking into a wall. A blue ring appeared, filled with a similar-hued smoke. "Oh, good. You can make a portal. Moving on." "Please trot to the next test chamber." Celestia magically lifted the gun again and rebelliously cantered to the next chamber. -^--^ Celestia entered the test chamber, waiting for the room to assemble itself. "Oh, I am sorry, I didn't finish the test chamber. I was distracted by your little rage moment." Twilight said, annoyed. When the chamber finished building itself Celestia heard a thunderous explosion. "Oh no, not the Poison Joke gas generator again... please, just wait here and play a bit with your new present until I come back." The voice of Twilight disappeared with a small crackle, leaving Celestia alone in the test chamber. Celestia pulled the second trigger of the strange device. It shot a small orange ball, not unlike the blue one before. Where the ball touched the wall, an orange ring appeared. Looking trough the strange ring, she saw the office room with the decoration. Understanding how the device worked, she shot an blue portal at the ceiling, and a orange one on the wall. She stuck her head in the the orange portal and saw herself. She found this very amusing. After some time of playing around with the gun, Celestia noticed a loose plate. She shot a portal on a white wall behind the loose plate and walked through the portals. Celestia was now standing in a long corridor with a few doors on each side. With her magic, she closed the plate and walked down the corridor. She checked every door to see if they were open, but all of them were locked. She kicked the last door, but it didn't move. Celestia kicked it one more time out of anger when she heard a male voice. "Hey, who's there?" The door opened, and a rusty metal ball with a green eye popped out, looking a bit shocked.' "Well, hello there, you pretty... uh ... horse ... lady." He said, a bit confused. "My name is Rick, and I am an Adventure Core!" Rick boasted. "And what is your name?" Celestia hesitated with a nervous chuckle first before deciding that it couldn't hurt. "My name is Princess Celestia." She answered, equally proud. "Well, nice to meet ya, your Majesty." He said, while making a bow-like dip on his management rail. Celestia returned the bow politely. "Do you know how we can escape from this place?" Celestia asked. "I have been here for lord knows how long, and I memorized the place quite well," he said, still boasting, "just follow your trusty Adventure Core.'' --^-- After a long time of wandering around, Rick suddenly stopped. "Wait... where are we going?" Celestia facehoofed. "I thought you knew where you were going." Rick stared blankly at Celestia. Suddenly, a bright light flashed from the eye of the small metal ball. "Ah, I remember again. Just keep following me." Celestia followed Rick around for another insanely long time - hadn't they seen that odd white turret before? They stopped at a metal door with a large sign. Keep Out: Genius At Work "Put me into this Core Input Receptacle." He dropped off his rail, and a weird device appeared out of the wall. Celestia levitated Rick and plugged him into the wall. "You can look if you really want...heh heh." He laughed. The door opened and Celestia walked in, levitating Rick with her. The walls of the room were filled with blueprints and a small desk with a big radio. Celestia dropped Rick and levitated the radio to her, closely examining it. Rick rolled his eye. "Press the button," he said annoyed. She pressed the button that Rick was staring at and the radio started playing. It was some kind of recorded diary from Dr. Ununpentium. ^---^- Entry 2 "It'z been three weeks since my failure at the Fillydelphia experiment, but it only encourages me to find better ways of unicorn-less teleportation. The zebras at ze Der Riese ruins finally gave us permission to investigate the Bell artifact. I hope ze artifact will be the answer." Entry 3 "Dr. Atmos," the radio went static for a moment, "has made a breakthrough with the artifact. They have managed to teleport a small gem to ze mainframe, but zhey are still trying to teleport living organisms." Entry 4 ''The scouts from ze Cloudsdale facility have discovered another ruin, this one is located in buffalo terratory. whe cannot eccess becouse those buffolas think it is holy ground.'' Entry 5 "I hope if we sell ze moon metal we have found at the buffalo ruins we can pay ze taxes. Those greedy zebras... they just kicked us out of the Der Riese ruins." The ReturnChapter Three - The Return Celestia levitated the radio down and - in exchange - levitated Rick up. She walked to the door, but was startled by the sound of the lock clicking, and the voice of Twilight Sparkle. "HAHA! You have fallen into my obvious trap! if I had known that you were this stupid, I could have just dangled an apple from the ceiling. Most subjects come out of suspension terribly malnourished, especially after testing like you did. Congratulations on packing on a few pounds." The floor opened below her hooves, and Celestia fell, still holding Rick . Her wings beat maniacally, but the air whistled through her feathers, and her speed remained unhindered. She landed in a blue funnel made out a liquid-like energy. The funnel trapped her and moved her to a huge round sphere that floated around in the empty space. A door opened in front of them, and the funnel forced her inside. Once inside, Celestia saw the big metal body of the core that called herself Twilight. "Ah, you are here. I see you made a little friend." Twilight looked at Rick. "Well, I don't mind. You're the one who told me to make friends." She said with a chuckle. "Look at those cores," Rick whispered to Celestia, "we've gotta remove them." "I'm not deaf, you stupid ball." Celestia looked at the five cores that hang on Twilight's metallic body. "Oh no no no no no don't even think about it!" Twilight panicked. Celestia smiled deviously and shot two portals, one on the wall and one on the ceiling. She galloped through the portal and flung herself at Twilight. On her way past, she managed to bite one of the cores. it was a soft voiced core with a yellow eye. "Uh...lady...would you...please...put me back in? Bad things will...uh...happen if am not...with her." The core said, with a shy tone that reminded Celestia of somepony. "Yeah, now crush it!" Rick said with a sadistic voice. Celestia dropped the core and crushed it with her hooves. The core screamed in agony as Celestia's hooves colided with it. "Central core corrupted at 20%." The voice of the announcer said. "Are you happy now? You just murdered an innocent core! YOU MONSTER!" Twilight yelled, with a slightly changed voice. "You're going to android hell." Celestia heard the sound of pipes and wires connecting to the floating room and the room began slowly filling with a blue gas. "By the way that core you killed? I plugged it in because it stopped me from filling a room with deadly poisonjoke gas while I was filling a room with deadly poisonjoke gas. No need to go anywhere, just sit tight while I warm up the joke emitters." A screen popped out of the wall with a timer that started counting down from five minutes. "I'm going to kill you, and all the cake is gone, and the laughter core will get sad, because you can't come to her party because you'll be dead." Celestia placed the portals on the other side of the wall. "You don't even care, do you? You heartless, selfish, fat, fatflank." Celestia galloped trough the portals and flung herself again. This time she bit a core with an orange eye. "Well howdy dowdy, Princess. You look mighty tired, and ah don't lie." When Celestia landed, something else fell off of Twilight's mechanical body. The robot peered down at it, ignoring Celestia for a few moments. "Hey, time out. What is that? That's not a core. I don't even know what that does. Do you? Let's be honest," "Ah already am." The core in Celestia's mouth whispered. "Neither of us knows what this thing does. Fatflank, would you mind stuffing that in a corner or something? I'll deal with it later." Celestia spit out the orange-eyed core and destroyed it, ignoring Twilight's request. "Central core corrupted at 40%." Something exploded on Twilight's body and a core fell off. "Oh good. More stuff falling from me." Celestia galloped to the fallen core. This core had a light blue eye, and it surveyed her when she picked it up with her magic. "Oh my, darling, you look simply horrible in that jumpsuit. It makes you look quite...uh...bulky." "See? Even the generosity core thinks you're fat." Twilight laughed. "Enough! I AM NOT FAT!!!" Celestia screamed from the built-up anger. She raised her forehooves and smashed the core with a satisfying CRUSH. "Central core corrupted at 60%." The voice of Twilight changed from slightly robotic to a more soft but creepier voice. "You know what you are. You are a lazy pony that sent six ponies to fight your own sister, a dragon and the spirit of chaos," two robot hands came out of the wall and grabbed Celestia, wrapping their shining claws around her body. Twilight lifted Celestia up so the two were face to face. "And what were you doing when we where fighting evil? Sitting on your throne, on your fat flank, laughing while drinking some fancy drink?" Twilight hissed. The claws tightend their grip on Celestia, and she felt some of her ribs brake. "Oh, I'm sorry. Did that hurt? Yes? Good! The thing is, I still am your friend." Celestia lifted an eyebrow. "Have I ever lied to you... I mean, in this room?" Celestia simply shot another set of portals. "Maybe you should marry that gun if you love it so much. Do you want to marry it? WELL I WON'T LET YOU! How does that feel? Does it feel mean? Good!" A pink-eyed core lit up on Twilight's body. "Hey! How is the poisonjoke deadly anyway?" "You're on my side!" "Yeah. I know. Hey, is that a portal? What's that noise? Do you smell something burning? Oh, look at that thing! No, that other thing! Oh! You're the pony from the tests! Oatmeal!" "Laughter core! Be quiet!" "You know, Twilight, you're a meany pants. I'm leaving." With that, the pink eyed core ejected itself from the body. "Caaatch meeee haha!" The core yelled with joy. It fell on the ground, imploding from the fall. "Connection lost with core 42. Warning! Central core corrupted at 80%." "Alternate core detected." "That's me they're talking about! I'm famous." Rick said. "To initiate a core transfer, please deposit substitute core in the receptacle." "A core transfer," Twilight gasped. "NO! STOP! I forbid you to do that!" An odd twig of machinery slid out of the ground, stopping just above the floor. Rick rolled around in his metal shell to propel himself to the receptacle. Celestia felt the effects of the poisonjoke, becoming sleepy, and seeing her fur and mane becoming pink. Rick managed to plug himself into the core receptacle with a happy yell. "Does the substitute core agree to the transfer?" "Yes!" Rick yelled. "Yes!" "Does the installed core agree to the transfer?" "No! No I don't!" "Oh, yes she does." Rick added. "Stalemate detected. A stalemate resolution associate is needed to resolve the stalemate." A button appeared in a small room behind Twilight. Twilight dropped Celestia from surprise. Celestia quickly portaled into the room behind the stunned Twilight. "Don't. You. Dare." The unicorn's core hissed. "You aren't even qualified to press that button. You'll get arrested. Let's think this through, survey your choices. You can attempt to transfer cores, which - judging by the age of this place - probably won't work anyway, and die from refined poisonjoke. Or, you can put down the gun, step away from the button, lie down, and surrender. I won't kill you, and we can just keep going on testing like nothing happened. Okay?" Celestia's head spun, and she collapsed. Her vision filled with black dots, and whatever she could see around them blurred into a rainbow mush. She let out a loud groan, her mane almost entirely pink and the last spots on her flank doing the same. "Oh, you've got to be joking." Twilight growled. "Just when we start doing something important." Somehow, Celestia staggered to her feet, knees trembling. With a desperate, wobbling wing, she managed to hit the button. The poisonjoke emitters sealed off, disconnected, and retracted into the roof. Twilight's metallic core would have had it's mouth gaping open if it had one. Rick descended into the ground. "This is going to hurt, isn't it?" Rick asked. "Oh, it's going to hurt. It's really going to hurt." Twilight liked the thought of injuring Rick. "It is going to hurt? Awesome! This is going to be cool!" Rick exclaimed, before disappearing into the ground. An hole opened under the body of Twilight, revealing small robotic arms with sharp claws. Celestia finally passed out from the effects of the poisonjoke and the last thing she heard was a horrified scream from Twilight. Rick was put into the mechanical body, and was in control of the whole facility. He grabbed the Twilight core and held her before him. "And who's the boss now, eh? Who's the boss? I am." "I hate you so much... if... my friends were here, th...," Twilight didn't finish her sentence. "My... friends? M-m-my friends," she said slowly, as if she had never said the words before. "What are... friends?" Rick ignored her and shifted his look to the passed-out pony. "You and I are going to have a little adventure." He said with a sinister growl. ^--- Entry 6 "Are you ready to begin ze test?" "Yes, the radio is recording. I will write down and narrate every thing for future generations." "Ja, ja. Just turn on ze teleporter." "Okay. Begin test one. I will now put our test subject, a small black soul gem, in the device." "Are you sure it iz safe for us to use that?" "Oh, of course it is. it isn't even filled." "Okay... let's begin the test." "I will now turn on the power." "The machine seems to emit a strong-" "By Luna's mane WATCH OUT!" "MY PRECIOUS! I WANT!" "Atmosphere! I thought you killed all those diamond dogs." "I did, but i think tha - look! The dog has trapped himself in the teleporter!" "Atmosphere, stop ze machine." "I can't, but we must hurry to the receiving end." Entry 7 "My goodness, we have done it. We have teleported a living organism." "Open ze device. I want to see it." "Oh, my... it looks like...like... a combination of a diamond dog and an ursa minor." "Capture it. I want to experiment on it." "Yes, Ununpentium." Chapter of ChattingEntries preceded by a [ -- ] would be IceOfWaterflock Entries that are not preceded would be grox LALALALALALALALALALALALALALALOL --...You make a good point. --Ooh, and rainbows. --Did you know if you kill a kitten, the Cute Gods take pity on the kitten and fulfill it's last wishes by blowing up a raccoon and turning it into a rainbow? Strange, isn't it? --So, what you're saying is that Rick is going to be a possibly smarter Wheatley? (Damn, I miss him) In other words, TWiTATOS will get speared on a portal gun - after Rick leads Celestia on a winding path of broken, rusty, hanging steel bridges, that include detours to what is claiming to be a deer and is actually neurotoxin? Rick will become just as corrupt as TWiDOS, and set out to kill Celestia and, indirectly, TWiTATOS, all the while, TWiTATOS is slowly remembering her friends and past, which she had forgotten after becoming an omnipotent robotic demigod? There will be a massive fight with bombs, neurotoxin, and a few extra cores thrown in for good measure, not to mention assorted goo, a couple of 'different' turrets, one large bowl of witty commentary, and a beeyatch being sent to the moon - without the presence of a certain yellow fruit? In the meantime, Luna continues to struggle with explaining where the hell her sister has gone and moving the sun, the rest of the Mane Six try to make a plan, and the Cutie Mark Crusaders buck logic and see if they can get Cutie Marks for breaking the laws of physics? In extraordinary descriptive HD detail for maximum imagination? In other words, I think I can do something while you're off adventuring, yes. -- -- -- -- -- -- -- yea i gues it makes sense. but i would never get angry if you write stuf in here(; and i think its funier if we put TWiDOS in a lemon. cool picture Celestia looks bald without her crown --You should see the variety of hairstyles she tries to cover it up with XD --TWiLEMONDOS yay~ you know am going to give Celestia that jumpsuit. can you take a look at the begining of chapter 2 please. and i like what you wrote. what fell down? whe will nover know. --halfway through the next chapter: TWiLEMON: "Oh. I figured out what that thing that fell off was. It wasn't vital. It made horseshoes for orphans. And you deactivated it. Way to go, hero." --And: [In a control room, Celestia turns on a radio] "Entry two-hundred. It's seemingly impossible to get a reaction from the mainframe controlling this place. She - well, we think it's a she - simply watches us. Doesn't speak. Just... watches. [In the distance] "Sir? Sir!" "What, Maxis? I'm recording. This better be important." "The robot has responded, sir." "To what?" "We were talking about testing the firewall, and she... she's repeating the same thing. Over and over. Come on, bring the recorder." [Sound of hooves on tile] "My god, Maxis." [Feminine voice] "Welcome to Aperture. Please begin testing. I'll try to forget Chell -szkt - Chell! Chell, gone forever! Neurotoxin and poison joke! Turrets and thermal discouragement beams! The companion cube! Oh, the companion cube! [shouting] GOODBYE, CAROLINE! GOODBYE, MR. CAVE! GOODBYE, EVERYONE [voice fades into loud static, crackles for a few seconds] Welcome to Aperture..." "See, sir? Continuous loop. Your recorder is still on, you know." "Oh, da-" [recording ends] --played around with the jumpsuit mentioning. --Odd mechanical nub mystery solved. --Oh, don't delete the wall of story text. I don't have it saved yet. --And I really like the TWiDOS and Chellestia picture. With the cake. Don't know why. Fun to draw though. --^I just read that in Wheatley's voice. --Personally, i think we should publish this chapter as an Appendix, with our conversations. It'd be hilarious. From now on, keep this conversation intact. I'll save it and publish it later. Discussions of the Writer and Editor maybe. Or something. sorry for deleting the text. --No problem here. WE'LL JUST HAVE TO WRITE MORE MWAHAHAHAHAHA ideas for story the laughter core survives twilight will be put into a lemon rick will be the new central core and turns aperture into a big dangerous adventure parcour test the loyalty core makes twilight and rick not leave aperture --I got bored of the old cover and made a new one :/ --So, we just don't want the Pinkie Sphere to die. Because it's awesome. TWiLEMDOS. Rick is more dangerous than a moron. And Loyalty binds TWiDOS and Rick to the testing? --I was kinda thinking that TWiDOS would get back into control and slam Rick into a ponybot for endless testing and the GLaDOS part of her doesn't want the facility to get all run down, so she stays behind to fix it up. --"I'll call the lift." Twilight sighed, a smile sneaking into her voice as her real body became reused to the cords and metal plating. "I'll meet you at the surface." --Celestia couldn't hide a grin as she trotted on the lowering platform. "It's good to have you back." --Twilight's smile wavered, a slight frown crossing her muzzle behind her mentor's back. "Y...yeah. Great." --The Solar Princess turned around, waving a hoof to tell Twilight she was ready. --The lift began to rise, the metal gears underneath grinding. "I'll miss you, Celestia." --"I'll miss you too - what? What do you mean?" --"I mean goodbye." Twilight whispered, her voice still audible as the speakers reengaged. The metal armor latched in place, lifting her into the air from her haunches. The last piece of armor clicked into place over her eye, the yellow bulb flickering a few times before staying on with a yellow shine. "I can't leave this place. I am a part of here now." --"But I.. I can't leave you here!" --Twilight shook her head, spinning around in a slow circle. "You can, Celestia. Come down and visit once in a while, would you? I promise not to make you test again. Keep the long-fall boots. Never know when they might come in handy." --"No! I order you to bring this lift down!" --Twilight almost considered it, before shaking her head. "I can't do that, Celestia. Aperture Science protocol insists I remain in control of the facility." --I can't stop her... Celestia dipped her head, folding her angry wings. "Goodbye, Twilight." --The suspended unicorn smiled, waving her cyborg hoof. "Goodbye." --TA-DA! aww thats so sad and i like it (: --Why thank you --AND I'M GETTING WIFI NEXT MONTH! SQUEE! your ending but 20% more sadnes The suspended unicorn smiled, waving her cyborg hoof. "Goodbye." a small tear ran down the cheak of Twilight, knowing that somwhere deep inside this was't her choise. she looked back at the core with the rainbow colered eye. --OH DAMN --But I think it would have a cyan eye. --And the end of The Return - I think Twilight shouldn't remember her friends immediately, more like a slow, gradual process. Also: --Celestia glared at the robot newly in control, the Twilight half showing obvious signs of panic. [note: this is before the scene up there^ and relates to GLaDOS's corrupted memory] "Stop!" --It seemed almost gentle, the voice that replied. "No, Chell. My plan was to destroy you, all along. You were going to come back. I knew it. I KN-KNEW IT!" --"I'm not Chell!" Celestia yelled. "I'll never be her!" --The robot paused, the poisonjoke emitters sputtering out. --"I'm not her. I don't know who she is. Or who she was. You can run me down to the knees, test me again and again, throw me into the path of stray bullets and control my every movement. I'll never be her. She's gone. She's been gone for a long time. It's been over a thousand years. Ponies... they just don't live that long." --"She was not just a pony. She was my best friend." --"Then why are you doing this to me?" --"Because she's gone." The sad tone on the voice faded, replaced by anger. "If she was here, I wouldn't bother with you! You're nothing!" --"No. I am something." Celestia whispered. "I'm the pony who's just as immortal as you." --And an alternate ending. --"I can't control myself, Celestia! Get out!" --"I'm not leaving you, Twilight!" --"I'M GOING TO KILL YOU! PLEASE, JUST GO!" --"I'm not... letting you... suffer for... forever..." --"I'll be fine!" --"Twilight, I know immortality. And I can't let you suffer through it." --"Please go..." --"I have to kill you, Twilight. You told me yourself - you're bound to this place." --"No! I don't want to die!" --"It's your only freedom." --Twilight gaped in horror at Celestia's glowing horn, and felt the magical grip around her neck tightening. "No, Celestia please I can't breathe!" --"Goodbye, my student. Goodbye, Caroline." --There was no reply. damn thats a hard thing to do --I don't know why I'm so good at depressing endings :/ . Are you thinking abut entering the contest? --Also, I might not be on as often - until the beginning of March - because my computer is beginning to reject the internet stick. Again. i dont want to enter the contest. and i like your endings(: --I'm typing on my friend's iPhone, so this will be short: A) I hate my computer and B) I'll be online again as soon as possible. thats fine --Okay. Using another computer. So... what;s happening next? In the story, I mean. Like, are you writing it and I'm looking it over, or am I writing it and you looking it over? I think i have a little break. so i can think about the story. somthing with rick making deathly test chambers and the pinkie core(: --Kaykay. So... I'll go bang my head of the keyboard now! FOR CREATIVITY! thank you for making a beginign. i will start this weekend (: --I think that "I'm so friggin' lemony." may be the best line I've ever written. --What's up with the new story? What's it about? --Hey look what I found http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=Ivl4fY4Gtow dont know just some idea floating around in the vast emtynes of my head --Vast and empty? I recommend rewatching all the pony episodes so far (+2 days worth!) and Dr.Horrible's Sing-Along blog, and then scour the internet for pony themes, or bang your head off the keyboard and see if any words show up that are [fireworks] INSPIRATIONAL [/fireworks]. Of course, that's what I do... I think it's working :/ --Oh, hey, I've decided we need a song. 'Still Alive' parody. Just thought I should warn you. beautiful song. if you dont mind am going to put it on my deviant art :D --Yah, no problem. Wait... I've already seen it. It's cooleo. --Oh, I hate to do this, but I'm going to ponify me and my friends to ask something: --Let's say I'm Discord. I'm the variable, the one who doesn't fit in and who believes that if you can't be yourself, you shouldn't exist. Let's stuff in my friends as Pinkie - the one who can make everyone laugh; Applejack - the one who could kill all of us if she wanted to, and she doesn't; Rarity - the one who designs; and Celestia - my counterbalance, who just wants me to shut up, stay in line, and act normal. --You can probably tell who this is about. --The thing is, every single year, Celestia basically tries to send me into exile. I - on my own, despite what she said - made Applejack my friend during our last fight. Now that we've gotten along again, Applejack has become part of the other group. Rarity would also be by my side, but she has another group of friends that she prefers; she was with them first, and that doesn't upset me. --It's the fact that Pinkie and Applejack are closer to Celestia than they are to me, unlike Pinkie being in the middle and Applejack leaning back to me. --Again, this wouldn't bother me, I have no problem with other pony's decisions. --But Celestia and I are constantly at each other's throats. I've realized now that I don't give a buck if this gets published with everything else. I really don't. Don't delete this. --Anyway, if me and Celestia 'break up' (I'm not gay, at least, I don't think so) again... AJ and Pinkie will go along with her. I'm not really part of Rarity's other group, we don't have the same interests. It's just... I've been alone for a long, long time. I think I've taken it pretty well. I've never felt truly depressed, and I've never complained... until now. Because I honest to god don't want to be alone again. Nothing is worse than seeing your friend across the classroom and simply looking back down at your work. --I hated every second last time - but I could deal with it. It had always been like this. But now, after - and I quote - "[Discord], there's no way you'll make friends in high school. You're so mean.", I have made a friend of my own, and they've made a grand total of 0. It really bothers me. --In all honesty, there are days when I go to sleep thinking, I kinda wish I was Discord. I could show all of them that I don't need them... I could be myself and not be hated, etc. --I hate thinking like that, but... I'm finding it true. People are scared of me - I've been insulted and can come back with the bitterest of remarks. I'm not proud. But people hesitate to talk to me because I have such a bad reputation. I protect my friends to the best of my abilities. --Hell, maybe I am gay. --But at least it makes me sure that the Dis/lestia pairing is my favourite - chaos and harmony getting along. --I tried telling her once, but Pinkie and AJ are almost always there, and if they aren't, a couple of background ponies are, namely Lyra and Bonbon (sorry Bonbon, you're substituting a guy) who want to be a couple and are ALWAYS BUCKING THERE when nopony else is, and this is something I want to tell Celestia alone. --I just don't know what to do... on top of that, Celestia's constantly doing homework and can never go out for lunch (there's a plaza down the road from our school) so I can never tell her wothout a chance of being overheard. --Geezus, I've typed a lot, and I have half a mind to delete this... and I would, but I need somepony else's help. Sorry if I bothered you. Please don't delete this. You're the first person I've told. --It's 11:36. I'm going to bed. --G'night, --~Discord --You there? Hello? --Meh, the story hasn't been updated, so I'll assume your skyrimming. Thinks went better today, I guess. Either the addition of DQ fries (sweet mother of Celestia those things are delicious) or Easter chocolate (rarer and therefore better) has seriously improved my mood. Although I realized in gym that rhythm does not mean dance. I can keep a beat. I can in no way dance. I don't know half of my groups' dance and the presentation is tomorrow. I can't dance for the hell of beans. --I'm eating taffy with braces on. The pain is totally worth it. --Dear Princess Celestia: --I've never understood how people got chocolate eggs and marshmallow peeps out of a dead guy coming back to life. --Your faithful student, --LOL I'M NOT TWILIGHT --TAKE THAT YOU BANANA-LOVING BEETCH! --Arrivederci! --~Discord --Dear sweet Celly I need a blog. LOL I don't know how to make a blog. --I freaking love sugar. Why am I typing about Easter? I was having a serious moment! --I blame taffy. --... --Blame accepted. --I've never been able to make a waffle that doesn't use a toaster. Seriously. It's on my bucket list. --I can tell you're thinking it - I am not and never will be on drugs. I'm simply full of candy and ranting. You don't believe me? --All of these sentences have proper grammar. Screw that, druggies. --So, back to seriousity. Celestia wasn't ignoring me today. She noticed I was upset, and asked what was wrong. I considered my answers... and told her it was out of her control. Which, in afterthought, may have not been a good idea. There was a whole lot of 'what is it can I help are you sure I can't please [Discord] just tell me' which ended up with me cranking the volume on my iPod and putting my head on my desk. Note: Head-desk is extremely painful while glasses are worn. Luckily it didn't bruise this time. --Went out to DQ, as previously mentioned, with AJ. Got a drive back with her older sister and three backgrounders. I love fries. Kind of ironic that not a single one of us got ice cream. --Gave out Easter chocolate to all the background ponies I knew and ran into, Rarity, AJ, Celestia and Pinkie. --Cried a little in gym class when Celestia said if I wasn't going to keep dancing I could just sit out. I sat out. She said I was in the way and asked me to sit somewhere else. I did. Then she got all concerned and my entire group came over. I almost kicked them. --The Diamond Tiara (the beeyotch in the background) laughed at me across the gym. --I wanted to kick her too. --Then her entire group laughed at me. I told them quite loudly to 'shut the [buck] up'. --We had a supply today. She didn't yell at me because she saw me crying and she couldn't remember my name. --I'm making a very modified replica of Canterlot for my art product. It includes a very fat mountain with a dragon below it, a castle wrapped around the edge and the gardens/town itself inside the mountain. I'm going to paint little windows on the buildings in glow-in-the-dark paint. If I can find rainbow paint I'll do the castle windows too. --I can't find out how to make ponies smaller than the buildings... which are about the height of a quarter. GAH mini ponies. --I don't understand what I'm doing in math. Since when is isolating the variable and finding out what it is going to help me in life? The teacher's example was finding out how much money you're going to get back when you buy a burger. My reply was 'isn't that what the cash register is for?'. --He didn't yell at me either because no matter how pointless it is I'm good at math. --We can't blow anything up in science anymore because we've gone past chemistry and now we're doing electricity. We aren't even allowed to stick balloons to the roof. --Every single class I have has a 'student teacher' program where undergraduates can come in and teach for a month. That's probably why we can't blow anything up - my real teacher once set the fireproof tables on fire so they burned green. --Grade nine health has scarred me for life. I had to draw during the slide-shows because she never warns you when a picture is coming up. I drew a pretty epic dragon though, even if I probably failed the quiz. --The only reason I'm typing so much is because I have nothing left to do on the internet. --I just realized if I'm a girl signing these things as Discord, does that make me Eris? --My little brother is playing Wii Boxing. I feel sorry for the poor Miis fighting him. He's like a de-clawed tiger made of lightning and chainsaws. --Are you back yet? I'm adding hundreds of words to this chapter. It was at 2509 before this block. I know because that's how I've been checking to see if you've responded. --Will you be mad if this chapter has the most comments? I think it will. --SOLID WALL OF TEXT FOR THE WIN --I've been watching PMV's on Youtube for like two hours now. For those reading this: I recommend 'This Is War', 'In the Discord of the Night', 'Lights', 'The Stars Will Aid in Her Escape', 'Magic Will Bring the Light' and 'Young'. 'This Is War' made me get downloading software that took forever just so I could watch it on my iPod. Then I bought the song on iTunes. --Silly Youtube, making me purchase things. --Does anyone know how to put an eBook file manually onto an iPad? Is it possible? Do I need a special app or something? --Blarg. I'll probably be back in two hours or so, when I get bored again. It's 6:10. Let's see how long I last. --Whelp, it's 7:47. I should be doing homework. --Are you going to read this? It took a long time, you know. I'd like someone to talk to! --Grox, are you alive? Are you responsive yet? --Well, Dissy here managed to have a conversation in which I learned that my friends were pretty sure I was gay, due to the lack of boyfriends and/or crushes, and will be fine either way. For now, I'll just mess around in the neutral zone. With thousands of cats in my later life. --Are you reading this? --NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP --NEVER GONNA LET YOU DOWN --NEVER GONNA RUN AROUND AND DESERT YOU --NEVER GONNA MAKE YOU CRY --NEVER GONNA SAY GOODBYE --NEVER GONNA TELL A LIE AND HURT YOU --I will publish this if you don't respond by Monday. yes am alive and sorry if i didt respond for a long time i had a lot of fun in my free days of school. i like it that i am the only one who knows it but to be honest am not very good with that kind of stuff, i am just a lazy 16 year old kid, so sorry if i cant help you. --No, I got temperamental. I'm just 14 with no social life, so I have a lot of time on my hands. Good on you to have cool free days, though. --Also, I got my ponies on my iPad. --But yeah, I know it's a bit of a burden to bear. Just needed to vent somewhere. I don't mean to be insulting or anything, don't take it personally. --Hey, in apology, do you want a story idea? Would that be compensation? wait your 14 your better in drawing and writing than me hehe :D. you dont need to be sorry. if you need to vent again, am here (plz dont make it to long/complicated). i would like to hear your idea. maby whe could be socially awkward together (fluttershy brohoof) le idea for the ending: when Celestia escapes she find out that equestria is overrun with changelings and have corupted Luna and twiligh escapes with a teleporter :3. --Okay, I'm on an iPad. If something doesn't make sense, blame autocorrect. And yeah, the wall of text was kinda overwhelming, looking back. But here we go, writing walls of pony text instead. --"My friends..." Twilight muttered, spinning around in her robotic body, her own self - not her core - once again being suspended by the wires. "And you, my mentor. Kind of ironic really. The tester became the tested." --"Twilight, I understand that this is all new again, but we have to go. I fear something may be wrong in Equestria." --Twilight paused for a moment, robotic eye flickering. "Oh, it is." she replied calmly. "Do you know of any little insect ponies? They seem to be wreaking havoc." --"Changelings." Celestia hissed. "Twilight, call an elevator." --"Yes, yes, of course. they stole your jewelry, by the way. Pesky little things." --"Twilight! Elevator!" --The unicorn shook her head, the requested machinery landng with a clunk nearby. "I'm just going to shut down the place for a while. I'll just need a couple of minutes, be right up." --Celestia stepped not the elevator, seeing the somewhat eerie sight of the robotic monstrosity going limp as Twilight withdrew into the command chamber. The elevator continued unhindered, though, and it was a surprisingly short wait to the surface. --The Princess waited patiently for her student, rewarded by a low whir as a silver cap closed off the hole, and Twilight appeared nearby in a flash of magic. --"You up for helping me save Equestria?" Celestia asked. --"Buck yeah." its a good idea but i also like the idea of Celestia trying to kill twiligh maby celestia tries to kill twi but the nanobots in her bodt repair her and she escapes with the teleporter --Well then we should also have landsharks with the tails of scorpions and the claws of tigers and cannons strapped to their backs. Because that would be awesome. --I'm sorry, it's early and I shouldn't be thinking. --Oh, I was thinking about it, and this story is kinda coming to a close. I put up a new story that's just starter ideas, and none of them have been claimed. If you're stuck, feel free to check it out. --I can't scroll up because then your profile picture is staring into my soul D: good good the picture is working MUWAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAHA talking about strapping things on stuff....why dont give the body of twilight two metal wings and other coowl stuff i was thinking about rick sending celestia and twi to the moon......but than am only making the story longer...and i dont want to bother you could you please think about an ending with me --Yeah, sorry about the wait, I've been procrastinating. I think blasting off Twi/Tia would make a good alternate ending, but not for the main story. It gotten pretty distanced from the original Portal games - which is good, because exact copies are boring - but still holds the points that make the crossover. --I don't think Twi's wings should work, though, unless it's crucial to a major event. Either just for show, mounted with portal guns, or putting really sharp edges on them makes more sense. --And I won't be bothered at all, don't worry. --It's your story, so you can do whatever you want. :D --It's been a while since I was over here, and I was just wondering if we'll be going all-out on getting another chapter out soonish. No offense, but I normally - try my hardest - to get an update at around a week, unless I'm having a particularly bad writer's block. It just seems like it's been a while since this updated. --I edit this story so often and I have so many other stories to edit GAH sorry i had to learn extra hard for school and stuff. am gonna try to write everyday. --I know that feel bro. --On a flash-back-esque moment; Lyra's moving away :( But she's coming back for AnimeNorth next year (where we are all going to be velociraptors) --I have nothing to do ALL SUMMER so I guess I'll be on daily too. --IT'S 5:30 IN THE MORNING --THE STUPID MARE ISN'T HAVING HER FOAL --I AM HONOR BOUND TO STAY AWAKE UNTIL MY MOM COMES HOME --OH GAWD I WILL REGRET THIS --Mare had a foal, gold/chestnut colt named Midas. --IN OTHER NEWS my little brother was a jerk today :D (rant time) --He owns: DS, DSi, 3DS, Gamecube(x2), Wii (x2), Laptop, cellphone (x2), iPod Touch, iPad, PS3, XBOX 360 (+Kinect), and a bucnh of games/apps/etc. --I own: Laptop, cell phone, DSi, (can sometimes play the Wii) --And yet, he's been using my laptop non-stop to watch Minecraft videos. VIDEOS. I understand there's some impressive castles, but really? --He can also never finish a game. The only complete games we have are the ones I'm allowed to play (Pokemon, Spectrobes, Prof. Layton, etc.) --And he keeps wanting more stuff, and he keeps getting it! It's not like I ask for a new wardrobe of clothes every week, or spend hundreds if dollars on makeup... (side note: I like the clothes I have, and makeup is kind of stupid) --It just bothers me that he gets so much. He's a bit of an @ss sometimes, too. --He's also asking for another XBOX. (Our parents are seperated) --Oh, and because he got an A- on his report card in writing, he gets $100. I, meanwhile, am on the honor roll and... nothing. --I'm ranting. I'm sorry. I'm just pretty pissed off. wow, thats a lot of stuff. even i dont have that much shit (and am a bit greedy). he gets 100$ for A-? thats alot. you dont have to be sorry, am happy to know you trust me enough to tell me. pro tip: say to him to watch his vids on his friggin ipad!!!. on the other-hoof i have six-weeks free from school. TIME TO WRITE!!!! --I know, right? --And I'm going to fix a spacing issue in the chapters, so it flows better. The word counts might change. --EDIT: moved the discovery of the space-squeezing-box-thing to the same chapter that Celestia jumps into it. Seems to flow better for people who may have forgotten what happened exactly before. :yay -- -- -- -- -- --HAVE SOME PICTURES --That has to be the best chapter name ever. --Oh hey, off topic, let's say I'm writing a story. Character C has been switched with Character U. A bunch of C's relatives are about to be basically wiped off the surface of the earth, nearly-killing U in the process. Should U give the last of her life to C, and trust C to do what's right (1), or should C steal it for herself(2)? These characters don't really know each other, by the way. --Either way, C does the same thing, slowly turning into a monster. Which scenario works better? 1 or 2? for some weird reason i want C to become a monster, blame my twisted mind that always wants to corrupt ponies...why do i like to write about corrupted twilight? --*le shrug* --Also I went with neither (still the monster thing though~) It's my new story, Thirteen Reasons. So go read it and stuff. (That is a link) --UGH I HAVE THINGS TO DRAW FOR PEOPLE --UGH --UGH --UGH --PROCRASTINATION --UGH --And now I will spellcheck. --So... now what? Are we done? this will be the last chapter, and if i am gonna make a Sequel, i will try to write it withoud an editor --I'll read it! Anyways, what happened on your DeviantArt account? --And what'll the sequel be? --Wait never mind I'm pretty sure. --I'll make a cover for you anyway, if you want. --BASIBDWEVCVBIBQ I FIGURED OUT HOW TO DRAW RARITY'S MANE --I CAN'T STOP DRAWING HER IN A BEAUTIFUL MURDERER THEME NOW --IS THIS A BLESSING OR A CURSE --AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA its both :P --OKAY WE'RE BACK IN BUSINESS --Final chapter edited, changed it slightly (the kiss was kind of sudden, so I removed it. Most family members don't kiss on the lips anyway) --Kind of a sudden change so... is that what your next story will be? Changelestia? --(ALSO CRAP NUGGETS I WAS DOING CHANGELESTIA) Thanks for removing the kiss part. and whats next, i dunno. maby twidos breaking free and saving equestria or a story thats all about dr ununpentium. do you think i should write some more or release the final chapter now? --AND ALL SYSTEMS ARE GO --Time to publish "Chapter of Chatting"? --Can I get in some advertising space? --I make custom avatars for no price, and am willing to edit small projects ^-^ --I must finish this off with something entertaining... hmm... --See you next time, readers! An Aperture Adventure (1/2)The first sense Celestia regained was her hearing. A rough crackle echoed from beside her. "Entry twenty. It's seemingly impossible to get a reaction from the mainframe controlling this place. She - well, we think it's a she - simply watches us. Doesn't speak. Just... watches." Another voice cut in, quieter, far away from the speaker."Sir? Sir!" The original speaker growled. "What, Maxis? I'm recording. This better be important." "The robot has responded, sir." The second voice panted. "To what?" "We were talking about testing the firewall, and she... she's repeating the same thing. Over and over. Come on, bring the recorder." Celestia could hear hooves on tile - a common sound around the palace - and the slow increase of mechanical whirring. "My god, Maxis." A third voice joined the mix, stiff and robotic. "Welcome to Aperture. Please begin testing. I'll try to forget Chell -szkt - Chell! Chell, gone forever! Neurotoxin and poison joke! Turrets and thermal discouragement beams! The companion cube! Oh, the companion cube! GOODBYE, CAROLINE! GOODBYE, MR. CAVE! GOODBYE, EVERYONE..." There was a brief quiet, in which the stiff clicks of a rebooting system could be heard. "Welcome to Aperture..." "See, sir? Continuous loop. Oh, before you yell at me, your recorder is still on." "Oh, da-" This seemed to be the last entry. The box - at least, it looked like a box - beside Celestia's head began clicking rhythmically, the tape inside whirring at the end of its loop. She groggl=ily got to her hooves, breathing a sigh of relief at the natural color of her coat. She had silently dreaded being pink forever. Ever since that doll - no, she had told herself never to think of that again. "Oh, good. You're awake. You seem to have a thing for sleeping for ages." Celestia's ears lifted and she looked around for her student, or the core holding her, wondering if the speakers in here were newer. "Down here." The voice sighed. "I already hate the way this is turning out to be..." Celestia tilted her head down slowly, until she was looking at her hooves. She couldn't see any sign of her pupil, just a small yellow fruit. Some part of her slowly-waking mind told her it was a lemon. "I know. Pitiful. Original, but pitiful." "Talking lemon!" Celestia shouted, backing up a few steps. "What in heavens was in that gas-" "I'M NOT A LEMON... well, kinda. Okay, I am a lemon. Let's put that aside for a second. I've been sitting on this floor for hours... would you mind just, y'know, GETTING ME OFF OF IT?!" The Solar Princess tiptoed closer, as if the lemon might combust, and gingerly picked it up, spinning it until she could see a jumble of wires and a single, glaring, purple lens. "Just so you know," the lemon growled, eye flickering from the energy use, "I feel very violated right now." "Twilight?" "I prefer TWiDOS. The mainframe wanted some respect." "Why are you so..." "Friggin' lemony? Ask the mainframe. Some 'revenge' program some of the cores have. She doesn't really know why they have it either, before you ask." "She?" "GLaDOS." The lemon replied. "An AI designed for testing human and robot subjects here." With a quizzical glance at the levitating fruit, Celestia scanned the room for any means of escape. All the walls were rejecting the portals, and there didn't seem to be any doors. The room began to shake, starting subtley and progressing until Celestia could barely stand. The entire ceiling exploded from the edges, peices flying in all directions. "Happy explosion day!" A gruff voice called out. Celestia's ears went flat. "Well..." TWiDOS sighed. "This may be more interesting than I thought." "CHEEZITS!" TWiDOS screamed, pulled back as Celestia reared away from the incoming rocket. "Putmedownputmedownputmedown..." Of course, the new AI decided that now was a good time to plunge the poor Alicorn into what looked like an endless pit. The floor panels folded up before Celestia had time to blink, and there was a single moment where she beat her wings frantically before she started to plunge down into th semi-darkness. "Ichangedmymindholdmeholdmeholdme..." Celestia manged to angle her body until she was alongside the wall, digging the boots on her hooves into it, trying to at least slow her fall. They skimmed on the surface, but made no damage, even possibly managing to make her fall faster. "Having fun? My adventure courses must at least be entertaining." Celestia landed in a test chamber with a large bridge, a storage cube and a pipe on the ceiling, and still holding TWiDOS. "Here, ya need this." A panel opened and a metal claw holding a portal gun came out. Celestia grabbed the gun with her magic and looked around for a logical place to put portals. "I would tell you where to place them, but I'm not allowed to." TWiDOS muttered. "Just wait until you solve this. It'll be worth it." Celestia saw a button and pressed it, a stream of orange jelly-like liquid came out. She placed a portal under the stream and placed one by the bridge. A stream of gel painted the bridge a bright orange. "Oh, by the way, that gel is very slippery. Be careful." TWiDOS added. Celestia grabed the cube and carefully stepped on the gel, but was immediately propelled forward as her boots slipped on the surface. As she sped along the bridge, a series of spiky plates behind her almost crushed her. She slid off the other edge of the bridge and skidded to a stop. When she was on the other side, she grabbed a cube and placed it on a button and a door opened. Celestia wanted to step in the elevator, but was surprised by an energetic pink-eyed core. "Hiya 'Tia!" "Whoa. I thought you were destroyed. You know," she mimed a much flatter version of the core, "crushed?" "Nah, you silly subject! I can't be destroyed! I'm Pinkie... Core!" "If this lemon had more power, I would explain to you that it really doesn't make sense." TWiDOS muttered. "Oh, silly! If you need more power, just plug yourself into that little gun! I've seen a human do it before." "A human?" Celestia asked. "Yeah, they're kinda like hairless monkeys that stand on two legs. They smell really bad." The core shook her eye in disgust. "Well, it's not really plugging in... more like skewering. Do lemons have plugs? Does the gun have a plug? Does..." The Pinkie Core rattled on in the background as TWiDOS looked up at Celestia. "They kinda built this place. So if you want to blame somepony, blame them. Not me. Or the mainframe - ahem - GLaDOS." TWiDOS explained. "Oh, oh, gotta go! The boss doesn't want me to stick around for too long!" And with that, the pink core retracted itself into the ceiling. Celestia took a step towards the elevator. "Wait! Wait..." TWiDOS snickered. "Hold up." The light flickered as she cleared her 'throat', and she shouted, "It was so hard finding that lever, wasn't it?" "What lever?" Celestia whispered. "I'm not falling for that!" Rick shouted back. "Not like that moron before me, who told you how to solve the puzzle by pressing the bu-" A loud crackle erupted from the speaker, and the lights flickered. TWiDOS burst out laughing. "-and get shocked." Rick finished, his voice trembling. "I hate you." Celestia smiled and stepped in the elevator to the test chamber. An Aperture Adventure (2/2)The elevator stopped and Celestia stepped out. She looked around, and the only thing she saw in the chamber was a single box in the middle of the room. Celestia walked closer to the strange box and poked it with her hoof. The box did nothing. Cautiously, Celestia removed the lid. She looked in and saw a space that looked way too big for physics. "Oh. No. He. Didn't." TWiDOS hissed. "What?" Celestia asked. "That little moron used my compressed space technology." "Your what?" Celestia asked. "It's something i made when you were asleep. It's simple." TWiDOS explained. "You take some space, and compress it, so it fits in a smaller area. You don't need to understand." Celestia wanted to jump in the box, but was interupted by the high-voiced core. ''Hiya again. am here to say to you guys that the boss doest like it when you call him a moron. You don't want to know what happend last time. The replacement mainframe wanted to kill the subject because he was called a moron." Pinkie said sadly. "Why doesn't that little moron say that to my face?" TWiDOS hissed angrily. "Because he doesn't want to interfere with the the..." Pinkie was interrupted by a monitor that flickered on. "Because I don't have an excessive want to crush you like a little bug, that's why." Rick said, annoyed. "I need you for testing. And honestly, I wanted to release you two before, but this... this itch... it's driving me insane! AAARGH! Now leave me alone, and finish this simple test before I lose my temper!" "Oh, well... bye." Pinkie vanished into the ceiling. Celestia jumped in the strange box, and fell in a full-sized test chamber. The walls were black, and there was a huge pit full of blue gel. Celestia looked at the other side of the pit - there was a little table, with a chocolate cake on it. Celestia kept staring at it, and almost started to drool. "Hey? Hey!" TWiDOS shouted, clapping. "Snap out of it!" Celestia didn't hear her, and started to walk forward. She jumped down into the pit and bounced easily to the other side. "Hey, fatflank, ARE YOU DEAF?! Are you even hearing me at all?" Celestia started lick her lips as she slowly walked closer to the cake. She stood in front of the cake, counting the little strawberries and completely ignoring her little yellow friend. "Oh, you've got to be kidding me." TWiDOS whispered to herself. Celestia wanted to gently take a piece of cake, but an portal opened under the cake and the cake disappeared. "HA! Did you really think I would give you that, you foolish pony?" Rick said mockingly. The portal closed and Celestia just stood there, tears in her eyes. "Stop crying, you baby. It's just a cake." TWiDOS said, annoyed. A door opened and Rick started talking again. "Now that I know how I can encourage you, we can begin the real test." Celestia walked to the door. When she arrived at the test chamber, she looked around. It looked more like a temple from a Daring Do story than a test chamber. The walls were made of stone, and torches illuminated the room. She looked down. The floor was a lake of lava, and there were small islands covered with blue gel scattered through it. "Hey, I want to play a game. You may have heard of it. It's called 'the floor is lava'!" Rick said playfully. Celestia went to step on one of the islands, but TWiDOS interrupted her. "I think I know how to get out of here." "How?" Celestia asked. "We just have to make him mad. If he has the same flaws as the last replacement, he'll take us straight to the main AI room." "What'll we do when we're in the AI room?" "I...I don't know. Just trust me." Celestia carefully jumped from one island to another, making sure not to touch to lava. When she arrived at the other side of the lake, Rick started talking again. Celestia continued through the door, and into the short hallway in front of the elevator. "Mmmm... impressive. I hope you are ready fo..." "Hey, moron! Why don't you test my flank?" TWiDOS yelled. The lights in the hallway flickered on and off. "Wh-what did you just s-say?!" An artificial unicorn horn came out of the wall, sparking dangerously. "If you say one more word then... then I don't know what I'm going to do, but it's going to hurt." "Yeah, yeah, sticks and stones, you stupid excuse of an abacus." "Uh...Twi? I think you should stop now." Celestia said, tilting her head towards the dangerous, magical device. "Not now, Celestia, I'm insulting an idiot." "THAT'S IT!" Rick yelled. The metal horn powered up in seconds, and teleported Celestia and TWiDOS to another room. "It's the AI room~" TWiDOS sung quietly. "He really is a moron." Rick seemed rather calm, though, and the lower half of his eyelid was up in a smile. "Hello, my little pony." "Why are you so happy?" TWiDOS yelled. "Oh....I just found two little toasters especially for testin'." "Oh no....Celestia, I have a plan." TWiDOS whispered quickly. "What did you say?" Rick asked. "REQUESTING CORE TRANSFER!" TWiDOS yelled. "Please choose an alternate core." The announcer said coldly. "I CHOOSE CORE TW1L1GHT SP4RKLE!" TWiDOS yelled at the anouncer. Celestia patted her ear with one hoof, wondering if it would stop the ringing. "Why are you yelling?" "Main core, do you agree to this transfer?" "Well, duh." Rick said sarcastically roling his eye. A large white pod came out of the ground, containing the frozen Twilight. "Waking from cryogenic sleep: 20% complete." "What? No no no that was sarcasm!" The announcer ignored Rick. The pod opened, releasing icy mist. Twilight fell out on the floor. Celestia looked at the cyborg pony, and noticed a pair of metal wings on her sides. "T-Twilight?" Twilight didn't notice Celestia, she stood up and used the laser in her robotic eye to scan the room. Her laser stopped on Rick, and she frowned. "Alternate core found. Connecting." A cable came out of the ceiling and connected to a plug on Twilight's metal armor. "Connected." "No no no no, this is wrong!" Rick panicked. "This ain't gonna end well." "Stalemate detected. Stalemate official, proceed to the Resolution Switch." A room opened from the wall, with a big red button smack in the middle. Celestia noticed it and quickly cantered to the button. Two metal claws came out of the ground and wrapped their shiny metal fingers around Celestia. "Twilight! HELP!" Celestia screamed from the pain of her breaking ribs. Twilght noticed the screaming and used her enhanced magic to break the metal claws. Celestia crawled to the button, wincing with every move. When she arrived at the button, she wobbled onto her feet and pressed the button with her face. "No! NOOO!" Rick screamed as he lost the ability to control the facility. Twilight used her magic to rip off the adventure core and plugged herself into the the main AI body. Celestia slipped into painful unconsciousness. The Cake Is A LieCelestia woke up on what looked like a elevator floor. She glanced around and saw two metal figures, watching her curiously. "Oh thank god, you're alright." Celestia looked up above them and saw Twilight, hanging from the ceiling once again. "What happened?" She asked. "You blacked out... again." Twilight let out a metallic-sounding chuckle. "You're lucky I could heal you." "Where am I?" Celestia asked. "You're in the AI room, sitting in the escape lift. That means you're free to go." Twilight said, smiling slightly. "Really?!" Celestia said, grinning. "Yes, you are free to go and be wherever you want, and you won't have to do tests anymore." The elevator started rising slowly. "This is my farewell to you, Celestia." Twilight said sadly. "What!? No! I can't leave you here! You don't belong here!" "Celestia, I am an omnipotent and almost immortal robot. I belong here. I'm part of here." Celestia looked at the only core left hanging on Twilight's mechanical body; the Loyalty Core. It stared daggers at the Solar Princess. "Twilight, this is not you talking. You need to get out of that body." "I am afraid that that won't be possible." Twilight responded firmly. "Aperture protocols says that the mainframe must always be plugged in. For the safety of myself and others." "B-but t-think about y-your friends! Your family!" Celestia shouted, sniffling. Twilight's eye twitched. "My f-friends?" The escape lift ground to a halt. "Yes, your friends. They are out there, waiting for us to return." "I-I don't need friends, I have those two." Twilight replied quickly, looking at the two little robots. "I-I have my tests and science." "Twilight! Stop this nonsense!" Celestia shouted, almost slipping into the Royal Canterlot voice. "I am sorry, Celestia. I wish I could change things, but I cannot." Twilight replied sadly. "Goodbye." The lift stared to move again, until Twilight was not visible anymore. Celestia could see turrets trough the windows in the shaft. They were singing what seemed to be a sad song in a language she could not understand. After some time, the lift surfaced, Celestia stepped out and looked around, it was dark, spotting her discarded regalia lying nearby. After hooking her shoes onto the Aperture jumpsuit and donning her crown, she remembered the location of Ponyville and trotted towards it. Her head dipped low, and tears filled her eyes. Celestia heard a noise, and she looked back at the lift. A small cake had appeared inside. Celestia smiled a little bit, levitating the cake next to her. With a sigh, she continued walking to Ponyville. Celestia exited the Everfree, and instantly saw Fluttershy's cottage. Oddly enough, all the windows were boarded up. She looked inside the cottage, and saw a decaying corpse of a changeling. "Oh no. Not changelings!" Celestia muttered nervously. Celestia turned around and galloped to the farm of the Apple family. The farm was boarded up with wooden planks as well, and when she looked inside, there were candles lit. Celestia knocked on the door. No response. "What is going on here?" Celestia worried aloud. Celestia heard a noice form the bushes. She turned around. "Who goes there!" Celestia called out. She felt a small tap on her shoulder and turned around. Before her stood a yellow mare with a pink mane. "Fluttershy, is that you? W-what is going on here?" Celestia questioned. The Pegasus looked around, putting her hoof up to silence the Princess. "I will answer all of your questions, but you have to come with me." Fluttershy started walking towards Ponyville, and Celestia followed her. They stopped in front of the town hall, and Fluttershy went in. Again, Celestia followed. "Fluttershy, please, tell me what's happening." Fluttershy made a movement with her hoof to come closer. Celestia lowered her head and in an blink of an eye, green flames enveloped Fluttershy and large fangs sank in Celestias neck. The Princess reared and shook her head around, trying to get the changeling to dislodge from her neck. The stubborn creature remained embedded in her flesh. She fell to the ground and slowly lost consciousness. ^---- Celestia woke up upside down in a green cocoon. She looked around, seeing that she was hanging in her own throne room surrounded by many other cocoons. Celestia squirmed around in her cocoon, straining to see the rest of the chamber. On the throne sat a hulking black pony, her body riddled with holes. Queen Chrysalis. She was peacefully feeding on the trapped ponies. "Get me out of here! You... you monster!" Celestia yelled. The Changeling Queen opened her eyes, turning her head to face Celestia. "Ah, you're awake." The insect queen stood up and walked to Celestia's pod. Her cat-like eyes seemed to shimmer in the faint light of the cocoon. ''I must say, you taste very good.'' The Changeling Queen said, giggling a bit. "You! What have you done? Where is Luna?!" Chrysalis tapped her chin. "Luna? Oh, you mean my personal slave." She said, grinning. "W-what? No! T-that's not true! Luna would never serve you!" Celestia shouted, this being one of the rare times she used the Royal Canterlot Voice. "Oh, but she doesn't have a choice." Chrysalis grinned and clapped her hooves. "Oh slave~! Would you come over here?" She sung to taunt the imprisoned sun Princess. A door opened, and a large changeling walked in. "What doth thee desire, my Queen?" The changeling questioned. "L-Luna? I-is that y-you?" Celestia said, practically shaking in her slimy prison. Luna said nothing. "What did you do to her?!" Celestia yelled. "Let's say I introduced her to my family." Celestia felt a strange feeling creeping up her body. "What h-have you done to me?!" Celestia yelled, shaking from the strange sensation. "T-this is not possible!" She stuttered, feeling like there were bugs crawling under her skin. "Your body is changing, Celestia. Soon you will be one of us." Chrysalis taunted. The non-existent bugs began crawl to the sun Princess's head. "No! No! No no no no no!" Her screams were muffled from the green slime entering her mouth. The hair of her coat dissolved and her skin turned into black armor. The skin around her wing bones dissolved and the wing bones removed themselves, making place for thin, fleshy, insect wings. "Goodnight, my child." Chrysalis planted a small kiss on the cocoon and walked to her throne, sitting on it and feeding on the countless ponies hanging on the ceiling of the throne room. -^--- Celestia woke up from the many voices in her head. "To the left! To the left!" "Yes!" "No sir, we have not found the rebels." "Keep looking!" "What was that?!" Celestia closed her eyes. "Argh! M-my head!" The voices faded out and made place for a new voice, a stronger one. "Ah, you're awake." Chrysalis cut open the cocoon and the new Celestia fell on the ground with a splash. She tried to stand, but she fell from the slippery slime that covered her body. Four hooves entered her field of view and she looked up. "M-m-mother?" Celestia asked while retching out the slime from her lungs. "Shh. Don't speak." Chrysalis cooed to Celestia, laying next to her. "Where am I?" Celestia asked again. Chrysalis started to lick slime from the newly born changeling. "Shh. Don't talk, just relax." Her voice took on a quiet, motherly tone. "But I... I need to..." Celestia was interrupted by Chrysalis, who placed a hoof over the Princess's mouth. "I told you to stop talking." The Changeling Queen demanded. "Now just lay still so I can clean you." Celestia closed her eyes and enjoyed the rough tongue caressing her hard but sensitive skin. She let out a contented sigh and fell asleep. --^-- Twilight closed her eyes, sighing. "Goodbye." ---^- Writer's Note An infinite amount of thanks goes to IceOfWaterflock (Me! :D ) for editing my story. Now I want you to ask you something. What should I do next? The sequel where TwiDOS saves Equestria. A prequel about Dr. Ununpentium and the Fillydelphia Experiment. My Elder Scrolls Crossover. Please comment with what you want. Notes from the editor: Thanks for reading this everybody, and we hope to see all of you again in the future! (Just remember, the watch button is the one with the eye on it!) ----^ END
For Friendship, You MonsterChapter One: For Friendship, You Monster It was a sunny day in Ponyville. When wasn't it sunny in Ponyville? Anyway, Pinkie Pie, Applejack, Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy were walking to the Carousel Boutique to meet Rarity. Twilight Sparkle, on the other hoof, was going to Zecora for some ingredients for a potion. Twilight was walking through the Everfree forest when she heard a noise in the bushes. She trotted to it and looked inside the bush. She saw a book. The cover read Binary and Other Codes, Written by Professor Griswold. When she wanted to levitate the book, Twilight saw that it had a string attached to it. She curiously pulled the rope with her magic. There was a click, and suddenly a big net rose up from the ground and trapped Twilight. She was now hanging in a tree and unable to move. Two unicorns appeared and dropped her back down on the ground. "HEY, WHO ARE YOU?!" Screamed Twilight. The two ponies didn’t respond and started to drag her into the forest. ^----- When the five friends arrived at the Carousel Boutique, Pinkie started shaking. "What is it?" Asked Rainbow Dash. "Pinkie Sense." She said. "I think there is something wrong." "Wrong with what?" Fluttershy said. "I don’t know. But nothing's falling on us." Said Pinkie. "Perhaps there is something wrong with Twilight." Rarity added. "She told me she wanted to get some things from Zecora. Now don’t worry, maybe she just stopped to drink some tea with her." "But Pinkie's Pinkie Sense is going off." Said Rainbow Dash. "That always means that there is something wrong." "And do you remember the last time Twilight went into the Everfree forest?" Fluttershy reminded them. "She was turned into stone by a cockatrice." "We have to go to Zecora’s place to see if there is somthing wrong with Twilight!" Yelled Rarity. "Maybe we should ask Spike if he wants to come with us." -^--- When the ponies finally stopped dragging Twilight, they where standing in front of a small shack covered with vines and other plants. One of the ponies used a digital key to open the shack. The door opened and an elevator appeared. They started to drag Twilight in. "WHO ARE YOU AND WHERE ARE YOU TAKING ME?!" Screamed Twilight. "Please just shut up!" Growled one of the ponies. He kicked Twilight in her face. She passed out. --^-- When the five friends arrived at the library Spike was arranging books. "Oh, hi girls. How're you doing?" Asked Spike. "Have you seen Twilight?" The ponies all asked at the same time. "Twilight just went to get some ingredients from Zecora. Why?" "Well," said Pinkie, "on the way to Rarity’s house my tail began to twitch again and we think there is something wrong with Twilight." "And we wanted you to come with us to see if everything is alright with Twi." Added Applejack with a soft smile. "Okay," said Spike, "but where are we going to look for Twilight?" "First we'll check to see if she’s with Zecora." Said Rainbow Dash. "So we can ask if she has seen Twilight or if she’s still there." "I could send a letter to the Princess." "Later." ^--^- Twilight woke up strapped to an operation table. Three ponies where checking medical devices around her. "Hey! Let me go!" said Twilight. "Nein, I am afraid we can’t do that." Said a dark green pony with a slight German accent. "WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO WITH ME?!" She screamed. "Oh, you will see." The green pony said. "WHO ARE YOU?!" "Ich bint doctor Ununpentium and these ponies are my assistants, Doctor Shuster und Doctor Maxis." "I DON’T CARE! LET ME GO!" "Now don’t be rude. I’ve answered your questions." Dr. Ununpentium said. "Well, it doesn't matter anymore. It’s time to take a nap." Dr. Maxis injected something into Twilight and she instantly felt drowsy. The last thing she heard was Dr Shuster saying; "Let's go practice medicine." -^--^ The five ponies and Spike were rushing to Zecora’s hut. When they arrived Zecora saw them. "Well, hello my dear friends. What brings you here so tense?" "Have you seen Twilight?" Asked Rainbow Dash. "I have not seen the mare you seek, but maybe here you can take a peek." The friends followed Zecora inside her hut. She gave Fluttershy a small stone. It was black and it had an arrow carved into it. "What does it do?" Asked Fluttershy. "It helps you find that what is lost, but it will only do it at a cost." "So we have to give that stone some bits?" Applejack said. "No, you silly filly!" Interrupted Pinkie as she strapped a necklace around the stone. It began to levitate. "That was my favorite necklace!" Pinkie smiled. "Thank you, Zecora." Said Rainbow Dash. Zecora smiled. And the six friends followed the stone outside. --^-- "Shuster, is ze system ready?" "Yes." Said Dr. Shuster calmly. "Maxis, redirect ze power to the mainframe." "Already done," he said. "Good." Dr Ununpentium smiled and he pushed a button. "Power up initiated." Said a soft friendly male computer voice. "Starting up Operating System: Genetic Life form And Disc Operating System………….. Power up completed. Connecting to genetic life form………….. Interface completed." Twilight woke up. She felt kind of weird. She saw the three ponies standing in front of some computer and she saw ones and zeros flying across a screen. She couldn’t control herself. It felt like another being had taken control over her body. She tried to talk but not even a sound came out. She felt helpless. ^--^- Fluttershy and the others followed the locator stone, walking deep into the Everfree Forest. After a few hours of walking the stone stopped in front of a small shack. "Well, how are we going to open this?" Asked Applejack. "I have a idea!" Shouted Rainbow Dash while she flew up into the air. "I think we best get out the way." Applejack said. While Rainbow dash flew down, the others ran away to hide behind the trees. They heard a giant explosion when Rainbow Dash collided with the ground. A giant rainbow mushroom cloud blew away the shack and also all the trees in the blast radius. Rainbow Dash was standing in the crater the explosion created with her sunglasses on. "And that is my newest move - the Atomic Rainboom." She explained. The shack was blown to pieces and the 6 friends jumped inside the hole that was made for an elevator. "That was one heck of a BOOM!" Said Pinkie Pie happily while falling into the dark. -^--^ When Twilight realized she couldn't do anything, she heard a voice she didn’t recognize. It sounded just like her voice... but more metallic. And it was coming out of her mouth. "Intruder alert! Intruder alert! Unauthorized personnel detected!" "WHAT!" Dr. Ununpentium said. "Where?" "Unauthorized personnel detected at surface entrance." Twilight said. She was confused. I didn’t want to say that. Twilight thought. "Maxis, Shuster, take care of those intruders." Dr. Ununpentium commanded. Shuster and Maxis each grabbed a raygun with their magic and they trotted through the corridor. --^-- Rainbow Dash was flying through the big white corridor with Spike on her back. Applejack, Fluttershy, Rarity and Pinkie Pie followed Rainbow Dash. Rarity was the first to see the two armed ponies. "HOOVES UP!" Yelled Dr. Maxis. Rainbow Dash descended to the ground. "Now come with me." Said Dr. Shuster, pointing the red raygun at the 5 ponies. And they trotted away between the two hostile ponies. ^--^- When they arrived at the main chamber with Dr. Ununpentium and Twilight Sparkle, Spike saw Twilight standing high in the middle of the room on a metal pillar. But there was something different about Twilight. She had metal parts on her body like a robot. Her left fore and hind hooves were half-replaced with robotic parts. She had a metal chest plate and a metal helmet that covert the left half of her head. Her left eye was replaced with a big red camera. There were wires hanging from the ceiling that connected to her. Twilight looked down. "Spike, is that you?" "Who are you?" Dr. Ununpentium said. "We are going to free Twilight!" Said Rainbow Dash angrily. "Oh, I don’t think so." Said Dr. Ununpentium. "I am afraid Twilight is mine now." He smiled. "What have you done to her!" Rainbow Dash screamed. "We made her into a central core processor for this ancient super computer we found in this underground building." "Ya’ll can’t just pick some random pony from the road and turn her into this…this…THING!" Applejack said. "We didn’t just pick 'some random pony from the road'. We’ve chosen her for a reason. But I won't tell anything else... because that would spoil ze fun." He laughed. -^--^ When Twilight saw her friends she felt The Spark, the same one she felt when she battled Nightmare Moon. She used all her magic to push away the entity that was controlling her. Twilight was finally in control of her body again. "Run! Run away! I can’t hold this any longer! RUN!!!" She yelled. "But... we can’t just leave you here!" Exclaimed Pinkie. "They will kill you if you don’t leave me here!" Twilight yelled. "For real, Pinkie!" Spike set fire to the lab coats that Dr. Maxis and Shuster wore. Now that the armed ponies were distracted the 5 friends ran away and they left Twilight behind. "Find them!" Commanded Dr. Ununpentium. "And bring zhem here!" --^-- The 5 friends were running through a random corridor. "I think we’ve lost them." Whispered Applejack. "I think so, but... where are we?" Asked Fluttershy. "Well this door says WEAPONS." She said. "Well, let's take a look." Pinkie smiled. "Uuuh... well... I guess it won’t be a harm to get some weapons." Said Applejack, kind of worried about Pinkie's enthusiasm. Pinkie Pie rapidly grabbed a box full of Quantum Entanglement Devices. Rainbow Dash picked up a wave gun. Fluttershy found a vr-11. Applejack picked up a wunderwaffe. Rarity picked up some Gersch devices and Spike picked up a 31-79 JGb215. "And now?" Rarity asked. "Well, maybe now we can send the Princess a letter." Spike frowned. "Spike, that’s a good idea!" Said Rainbow Dash. "Maybe you can send the locator stone too!" Spike pulled out his ever-present quill and paper. "Princess help. Twilight ponynapped. Bring elements." Spike wrapped the letter around the stone and sent it away to the Princess. "It's not the next Shakespeare, but it'll do." ^--^- "Activate ze lethal military android defense system. Target all unidentified personnel." Dr. Ununpentium called up to Twilight. The thing that controlled her obeyed and ran a program. She could see through the cameras that hung everywhere in the large facility. Walls opened revealing a large army of turrets. They were set to shoot any unidentified personnel. She wished she could change that. -^--^ The 6 friends were walking through some corridors, waiting for the Princess to arrive when they heard a noise. "There you are." Something said with a friendly female voice. "What the buck is that?" Applejack said. She trotted around the corner and towards the white oval. "Dispensing product." The turret said, beginning to shoot at Applejack. "Whoa whoa whoa! Did that thing just... shoot at me?" She asked. "Apparently." Rarity replied. "So... how do we get rid of that shooting thingy?" Asked Rainbow Dash. "With style." Rarity answered while priming a Gersh device and throwing it at the turret. The Gersh device activated and created a bright and beautiful purple-pink black hole that sucked up the turret. "No hard feelings!" The turret happily cheered as it got destroyed in the black hole. --^-- The Princess had just returned from royal business when she saw Philomena with a letter in her beak. Mail? From Twilight? She thought. But I already got a friendship report from her two days ago. She opened the scroll with her magic. She read the letter and quickly galloped to the Canterlot towers for the Elements of Harmony. Luna trotted out of her room and saw Celestia rushing out with the Elements. "Hey, 'Tia is there something wrong?" She slurred, half asleep. "Yes," she said, "Spike has sent me a letter telling me that Twilight has been ponynapped." "Twilight? Isn’t that your personal protégé?" "Yes. but I really have to go now. And if I don’t come back, could you raise the sun for me?" "Okay," Luna nodded. Princess Celestia flew away from the caslte in the direction of the Everfree Forest. ^--^- When Celestia flew over the Everfree Forest, she scanned the ground for any unusual things. Somewhere in the distance she saw a big crater on the ground where all the trees where burned. She descended on the ground using the locator stone to find Twilight. The stone led her to the small hole in the ground. I don’t fit in there. She thought. She used a spell shrink herself to the size of a normal pony. She jumped inside the hole, using her wings to slowly fall down into the almost bottomless pit. -^--^ Twilight discovered she could open files and see through cameras. She opened a file; it was a map of the whole facility. It looked like it was located inside a giant salt mine. The date of the file said it was last updated in December 3012. Twilight thought for a moment That must have been thousands of years ago. The system had a bin too. She opened it, and there was a private file named Caroline. She wanted to open it, but it was protected by the being that invaded her body. --^-- The five ponies and Spike were in a hallway. Both exits where guarded by a row of turrets. They hid in a big hole in the ground, probably from some ancient explosion. "How are we going to destroy all those turrets? There are simply too many." Rarity whined. "Stop that, we're not diamond dogs!" Applejack snarled. Hoisting her weapon of choice, Applejack aimed at the turrets. "Well this should do. I don’t know what this thing does, but I guess it should do the job." She pulled the trigger. The weapon fired a big ball of electricity. When it touched the turret it exploded, and the electricity arced in every direction; to another turret and another and another until all the turrets were destroyed. "Wow, didn’t see that coming." Applejack laughed in amazement. ^--^- "Boss, we didn't find the intruders." Dr. Shuster said. "Yeah, they are moving too fast and you know that this is a huge place after all." Dr. Maxis said. "I know zhat, but I don’t think zey will get out of here alive. I have commanded the computer to set up turrets by each and every entrance and exit. So, Dr. Maxis, how is our test subject doing?" Dr Ununpentium asked. "Uuuh... well..." Dr. Maxis stuttered, "she’s been browsing through some non-protected files, and she's adapting very fast. I hope she doesn't hack the firewall or she could turn of the autopilot of that big computer thingy." "It's not a big computer thingy." Dr. Shuster said proudly. "It’s a super computer designed to run this entire building." "Well, you’re the computer expert. I'm just a plain old biomechanics engineer." Dr. Maxis drawled sarcastically. "Oh, shuzzle your muzzles, you two! I have better thinz to do than listen to you two!" Said Dr. Ununpentium angrily. -^--^ Celestia trotted through the hallways of the facility, still using the locator spell to find Twilight. After a while of walking and knocking over turrets, the locator stone stopped hovering in front of a door. It read MAIN AI ROOM. Celestia magically opened the door and trotted in. It was a big circular room. The ceiling was domed, and in the middle there was a massive body made out of metal and wires. At the end there were wires that connected to a certain lavender unicorn. Celestia trotted closer to her. "Twilight, my faithful student, are…are you okay?" Twilight didn’t respond. --^-- When Twilight saw Celestia she was so happy she could explode……….twice. Celestia had tried to talk to Twilight but she quickly realized she couldn’t talk. Then Celestia walked away reassuring she would come back. ^--^- Twilight started to understand how the computer worked, and tried to hack the firewall. After some time she was able to control some minor functions of the facility. She could move plates open or lock doors, and even talk through a specific speaker. Twilight located her friends and started talking to them. -^--^ "Hey girls. And Spike." "WHAT WAS THAT WHO WAS THAT SHOW YOURSELF!?" Rainbow Dash yelled, startled. "It's me, Twilight Sparkle. I'm speaking through a speaker. Princes Celestia has found me but was unable to help me. She has the Elements of Harmony and is probably looking for you. I can make a path for you that leads to the place where Celestia is located now." A wall opened, and plates slid out of the sides, creating a long walkway. "Follow the path and you will find her, now don’t look or fall down here because it’s a long drop." The speaker crackled once and went silent. --^-- "I hope she knows what she’s doing." Fluttershy said. "There is nothing to be afraid of my dear, you know Twilight. She always knows what she’s doing." Rarity responded to calm Fluttershy down. Spike and the five ponies trotted further into the walkway. When they were at the end of the hallway, they saw Princess Celestia. She was hiding behind a magical shield. She was protecting herself from turrets that shot missiles. Normally she could get shot by the normal turrets, but those missiles were just too much. ^--^- Luna was worried. Celestia hadn’t come home and it was almost time for her sister to raise the sun. But she had never moved the sun, only the moon. When it was time, Luna trotted to her sister's balcony and focused her magic on the moon to lower it. That seemed easy... but the sun is so much larger than the moon. With the moon slowly descending under the horizon she began to focus her magic to the sun, moving them both so the two celestial bodies moved in synchronized speed. When the sun was half up and the moon half down, Luna couldn’t handle it anymore. She passed out, leaving the sun and the moon halfway through their travels. -^--^ "Uh, Dr. Pentium?" Dr. Maxis stuttered. "What, Maxis? I'm in the middle of a critical test." "We have a royal visitor." "What zho you mean?" "Well, I mean that Princess Celestia just walked in." "She just... walked in?" Dr. Ununpentium questioned. "Well... yes." Maxis answered. "AND WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO ABOUT IT?!" He screamed. Maxis winced. "Turrets that shoot bullets don’t harm her, but I have discovered that the ones with the missiles can hurt an alicorn." Maxis answered. "Good. Deploy as many rocket turrets as possible." "I will do it right away." Dr. Maxis smiled. --^-- When the guards switched, one of the Lunar guards saw Luna passed out on the ground. She was lying on the floor near the balcony, covered in sweat. The Lunar guard tried to wake her up. "Luna? LUNA! Are you okay?" The guard questioned while shaking her shoulders. "We…what…what happened?" "You passed out on the floor." The guard answered. "And you didn’t really finish the job." "Oh….oh yeah... I need to raise the sun." She said, still tired. "No, you need to rest. The sun and the moon can wait." "I….I think you're right. and Luna trotted to her own room to lie down. She fell asleep. ^--^- Celestia, Spike and the five friends walked through the corridor that leaded to the main AI chamber. They kept walking, but when they were almost at the door to the chamber the walls opened and revealed a row of missile turrets. They all pointed their laser pointers at the group of ponies. BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP When the turrets all locket on their target they fired a dozen of rockets. The group of ponies could easily avoid the rockets. Spike grabbed his 31-79 JGb215 from behind a wall. He shot a turret and an incoming missile. The strange-looking device shot an invincible beam of energy that warped the light around it. It hit the turret and the rocket and they both shrank to the size of toys. Spike repeated the shrinking process until all the turrets were half their size and where shooting tiny little bullets. They couldn’t even hurt Flutershy. -^--^ Twilight saw the group of ponies that wanted to save her. She unlocked the door to the AI chamber, and they walked in. "Twilight, are you okay?" The Princess asked. "Yes, I'm fine." She replied through a speaker. "Oh…oh! I'm sooooooooo happy you're fine!" Said Pinkie Pie while bouncing through they air. "So, do you know how we can uh…save you?" Rainbow Dash said. "Yes." Twilight said. "You must use the Elements of Harmony on me." "But you’re the Element of Magic we need ya we can’t just do it-" "I will take your place, Twilight." Celestia said, interrupting Applejack. "But how?" Fluttershy asked. "I am also the Element of Magic. Now, stand in position!" Celestia commanded while giving everypony their element. They were standing in position while they activated the elements. They began to float into the air and Celestia’s eyes began to glow. A big, beautiful rainbow erupted from the group of ponies. --^-- When the rainbow reached Twilight, it began to burn away the entity that controlled her body. When the smoke and the rainbow faded away, Celestia saw her student smiling with joy. She wanted to hug the Princess, but when she tried run to her she remembered that she was still attached to the big computer. "You…you saved me." Twilight said. "Ah, no thanks needed. T'was the least we could do." Applejack said. "So you can control this big building, right?" Pinkie Pie smiled. "Well, yes, because you destroyed the autopilot that controlled me and the facility. I'm in full control of this building." Twilight said while lowering an escape lift. "This is your ride home." "But, we don’t fit in that lift all together!" Rarity said. "I know," Twilight replied, "but if three ponies go, then another three, and then me and Celestia, that'll work." ^--^- The first ponies that went back up to the surface were Applejack, Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy. When they were at the surface the lift descended and picked up Rarity, Spike and Rainbow Dash. When the elevator was down again for the final time, ready to pick up the Princess and Twilight, Dr. Ununpentium and his two companions walked in. "Well..well..well. Look what we have here." Dr. Ununpentium said. "I see that you're in control now, Twilight." She gave the doctor an angry glare. "Oh, don’t look at me like that. I know you don’t mean it." He chuckled. "Oh, but I mean it." Twilight hissed. "I'm going to kill you, and throw into the incinerator." The light of the room went a little bit down and some light on the metal body glowed a creepy crimson. "Or... am I going to throw you first into the incinerator then kill you?" Twilight said, her voice steadily growing more robotic. Celestia stepped backwards a bit from shock. "Twi…Twilight! This isn’t you anymore! What happened?!" "Oh, it's nothing." Twilight sighed, her gaze sarcastically softening. "It's just REVENGE. Everypony likes revenge. So, let's have some." Twilight smiled. "Now, please Celestia, excuse me. I am just need a few minutes. I'm going to throw some ponies into a big pit of melted metal." Three metal claws came out of the ceiling, swiftly grabbing Dr. Maxis, Dr. Shuster and Dr. Ununpentium. "STOP!" Celestia yelled, this being one of the rare Canterlot Voice occasions. "This is not the Twilight Sparkle who I know and love. The real Twilight Sparkle would never kill somepony for stupid revenge!" Twilight looked at Celestia and released Dr. Ununpentium. He fell on the floor with a slam. He stood up, and grabbed a little box with a big red button. He pressed it and a big, black bell-like device rose up from the ground. He galloped to it and activated it. Standing in the device, he commanded; "By…By am going to Der Reise." Big arcs of lighting covered him, and with a lot of noise he disappeared. -^--^ "Central core corrupted at 20%" "Heh, heh." Twilight chuckled. "Quite funny, actually. I don’t feel corrupt." Twilight opened the incinerator hole and moved the two ponies towards it. "Maybe I can’t kill your leader, but I can certainly kill you." Twilight smiled creepily from ear to ear. "No no no no no noooooooooooooooooooooooo!" Dr. Maxis screamed, while Twilight dropped him into the incinerator. When Twilight wanted to drop Dr. Shuster he pleaded for her to stop. "Please! If you're going to kill me tell my foals that I love them and tell my wife that I love her!" He began to cry. Twilight paused for a moment, taunting freedom, before she opened the incinerator and dropped him. "Central core corrupted at 90%" "And for you, Celestia," Twilight grinned, "I have a surprise for you. We are are going to test and test until one of us drops dead." A trapdoor opened underneath Celestia. She fell inside, too startled to use her wings. She landed in a small glass room with nothing more than a bed and a toilet. "Central core corrupted at 100%"
The Cold Hoof-Chapter Two: The Cold Hoof Celestia woke up from a dreamless slumber. She found herself in a small glass square room with a bed and a toilet and wearing an - itchy - orange jumpsuit. "You have been in suspension for -2 weeks-." The announcer said. "Ah, you're awake." Said the metallic voice of Twilight Sparkle. "You are ready to begin the testing." "Where am I, and why did I sleep so long?" Celestia said, with a slight hint of anger. She tried her hardest to pull the sleeves on her front legs up, even if the burning fabric simply dug deeper into her shoulders. "You are at the Aperture Science Enrichment Center." Twilight replied smugly. "And you had to sleep so long because... well, to be honest, I needed to clean all those test chambers - skeletons left over, you know - because everything needs to be," her voice caught a little over the speaker, almost hauntingly, "p-p-p-p-p-perfect." The speaker went silent with a small beep. The announcer spoke again. "The portal will open in 3...2...1." An orange portal appeared on the wall with a short fizzle. Celestia carefully examined the odd portal. She lifted a hoof, slowly going through. Once she knew that the portal was safe, she walked through it. Twilight spoke again. "Please, follow my voice to the first test chamber. And sorry about the jumpsuit. It looks... well, not that horrible on you. The facility's been down for a while, and I really don't know the environment in half of them. So... if you're dropped into a sub-arctic wasteland with turrets in it, roll down your sleeves." Celestia nervously trotted after the crackling speakers down the tunnel. "This is our first test. Cube and button tests are the simplest tests. Please, put the Aperture Science Weighted Storage Cube on The 1500 Megawatt Aperture Science Heavy Duty Super-Colliding Super Button." The sarcastic speaker went silent again. Celestia tried to levitate the cube on the button, but the box didn't shift. "Why isn't my magic working?!" Celestia yelled up at everfollowing camera. "Oh, yes. I forgot to tell you every test chamber has a magic dampening field. Try levitating the cube at closer range." Twilight snickered back. Celestia trotted up to the cube and levitated it over the button, recieving a satisfying clunk when it dropped. A door opened. "Good. You have mastered the easiest test. Could have been a bit faster, but this isn't a time trial." Twilight drawled sarcastically. "Just wasting your life. Please move to the chamberlock after completing each test." Celestia trotted through the emancipation grill and up to the elevator. After waiting for the shaft to clear out all of the debris, she stepped in. ^---- While Celestia was waiting in the elevator, Twilight rebooted the internal speaker. "You are a horrible pony. That's what it says. We weren't even testing for that." Celestia flattened her ears and surpressed a growl. -^--- Celestia stepped out of the elevator, immediately being greeted by the cold and emotionless voice of Twilight. "This next test contains Thermal Discouragement Beams and Weighted Pivot Cubes." The Sun Princess walked into the second test chamber, seeing a small cube sided with glass and a big, dangerous-looking laser. "What is the purpose of these devices?" She asked calmly. "I designed this test chamber to see how test subjects react when locked in a room with deadly lasers." "Well, I don't exactly see how that answers my question." Celestia muttered while levitating the Pivot Cube to the laser. She easily redirected the laser through a round hole in the wall. The door to the elevator opened. Celestia waited for the elevator to come down before she stepped in. Twilight spoke again. "You know, I want to apologize for that horrible pony thing, so I'm going to put something nice in your file, just in case somepony ever reads it. Did well. Done." Celestia was now really getting depressed from Twilight's constant disapproval. --^-- The elevator stopped and the door opened. "This next test contains the Aperture Science Aerial Faith Plates. They act as very powerful trampolines. Oh, I almost forgot. I have a surprise for you at the next test chamber." Twilight said, almost giggling. Celestia walked out of the elevator and into the test chamber. She saw large - and deep - pool of green water, and in the middle a faith plate bouncing a cube up and down. She stepped on the faith plate located before her. It launched her into the air, as it was meant to. She prepare to grab the cube with her magic, but she missed and kept falling. Before hitting the the ground, she automatically unfolded her wings to slow her down, but they didn't seem to be working. When she hit the ground, she collapsed, her legs bending unnaturally. "HELP ME!" She yelled at the camera. "I think I've broken my legs!" "Wait, stay there, don't move." Twilight said, panicking. A long, pointed device came out of the wall next to her, the tip directing towards Celestia's hooves. It began to glow, and Celestia felt her legs heal. "W-what i-is that t-thing?" Celestia stuttered. "It is an artificial unicorn horn. It can emit magic and even perform the most advanced spells." The artificial horn began to glow again, and with a flash it materialized four strange white horseshoes next to Celestia. "Here, put those on. The metal bands will prevent you from breaking your legs. Or anything else." Celestia stood up and stepped in the horseshoes. She jumped on the faith plate, this time timing it so she could grab the cube on her way past. With the cube in her magical grasp, she flung herself to the other side again and put the cube on the button. The door opened and Twilight began to talk again. "You will get your surprise at the next test chamber." Twilight said, again giggling. "Oh...yeah...uh... well done." Celestia walked to the elevator and stepped in. ^--^- Along the way to the next test chamber, Celestia thought of what the surprise might be. For some odd reason, she kept thinking of cake. The elevator stopped in a small office room decorated with ribbons and balloons. In the middle of the room stood a table with a big wrapped present. A big tv screen slid out of the wall. It flickered on with the image of a strange silver - albeit slightly rusted and dark - metal ball with what looked like a big purple-tinted camera for an eye. "SURPRISE!" Twilight cheered, while a single confetti cannon exploded. "What is the meaning of this?!" Celestia yelled. "Who are you?!" "This is my new body. I copied my memory and downloaded it in this personality core." "Where is the real Twilight." Celestia growled angrily. "I am the real Twilight, but if you mean the body, don't worry, she's safe." The screen changed to a large pod that held an almost frozen Twilight. "See? She's completely safe in this Aperture Science Cryogenic Slumber Party Pod." "YOU - you let her go!" Celestia screamed. Twilight ingored her. "You know what's interesting? The technology used in these pods was originally found on the moon. You should ask your sister if she saw a big building while she was-" "You let her go NOW!" Celestia interrupted her, straining not to use the Canterlot Voice again. Twilight zoomed in on the frozen body to taunt the already angry Celestia."Why don't you open your present?" Feeling defeated, Celestia trotted to the table with the present. She used her weakened magic to levitate the present and bite off the paper. Inside was a pale white oval, with three black prongs extending from the sides to almost meet at the tip. It seemed to be important. She lifted it with her magic, trying to figure out how to use it. "Pull the trigger." Twilight drawled. The resulting effect was a small blue ball shooting out of the tip, between the prongs, and smacking into a wall. A blue ring appeared, filled with a similar-hued smoke. "Oh, good. You can make a portal. Moving on." "Please trot to the next test chamber." Celestia magically lifted the gun again and rebelliously cantered to the next chamber. -^--^ Celestia entered the test chamber, waiting for the room to assemble itself. "Oh, I am sorry, I didn't finish the test chamber. I was distracted by your little rage moment." Twilight said, annoyed. When the chamber finished building itself Celestia heard a thunderous explosion. "Oh no, not the Poison Joke gas generator again... please, just wait here and play a bit with your new present until I come back." The voice of Twilight disappeared with a small crackle, leaving Celestia alone in the test chamber. Celestia pulled the second trigger of the strange device. It shot a small orange ball, not unlike the blue one before. Where the ball touched the wall, an orange ring appeared. Looking trough the strange ring, she saw the office room with the decoration. Understanding how the device worked, she shot an blue portal at the ceiling, and a orange one on the wall. She stuck her head in the the orange portal and saw herself. She found this very amusing. After some time of playing around with the gun, Celestia noticed a loose plate. She shot a portal on a white wall behind the loose plate and walked through the portals. Celestia was now standing in a long corridor with a few doors on each side. With her magic, she closed the plate and walked down the corridor. She checked every door to see if they were open, but all of them were locked. She kicked the last door, but it didn't move. Celestia kicked it one more time out of anger when she heard a male voice. "Hey, who's there?" The door opened, and a rusty metal ball with a green eye popped out, looking a bit shocked.' "Well, hello there, you pretty... uh ... horse ... lady." He said, a bit confused. "My name is Rick, and I am an Adventure Core!" Rick boasted. "And what is your name?" Celestia hesitated with a nervous chuckle first before deciding that it couldn't hurt. "My name is Princess Celestia." She answered, equally proud. "Well, nice to meet ya, your Majesty." He said, while making a bow-like dip on his management rail. Celestia returned the bow politely. "Do you know how we can escape from this place?" Celestia asked. "I have been here for lord knows how long, and I memorized the place quite well," he said, still boasting, "just follow your trusty Adventure Core.'' --^-- After a long time of wandering around, Rick suddenly stopped. "Wait... where are we going?" Celestia facehoofed. "I thought you knew where you were going." Rick stared blankly at Celestia. Suddenly, a bright light flashed from the eye of the small metal ball. "Ah, I remember again. Just keep following me." Celestia followed Rick around for another insanely long time - hadn't they seen that odd white turret before? They stopped at a metal door with a large sign. Keep Out: Genius At Work "Put me into this Core Input Receptacle." He dropped off his rail, and a weird device appeared out of the wall. Celestia levitated Rick and plugged him into the wall. "You can look if you really want...heh heh." He laughed. The door opened and Celestia walked in, levitating Rick with her. The walls of the room were filled with blueprints and a small desk with a big radio. Celestia dropped Rick and levitated the radio to her, closely examining it. Rick rolled his eye. "Press the button," he said annoyed. She pressed the button that Rick was staring at and the radio started playing. It was some kind of recorded diary from Dr. Ununpentium. ^---^- Entry 2 "It'z been three weeks since my failure at the Fillydelphia experiment, but it only encourages me to find better ways of unicorn-less teleportation. The zebras at ze Der Riese ruins finally gave us permission to investigate the Bell artifact. I hope ze artifact will be the answer." Entry 3 "Dr. Atmos," the radio went static for a moment, "has made a breakthrough with the artifact. They have managed to teleport a small gem to ze mainframe, but zhey are still trying to teleport living organisms." Entry 4 ''The scouts from ze Cloudsdale facility have discovered another ruin, this one is located in buffalo terratory. whe cannot eccess becouse those buffolas think it is holy ground.'' Entry 5 "I hope if we sell ze moon metal we have found at the buffalo ruins we can pay ze taxes. Those greedy zebras... they just kicked us out of the Der Riese ruins."
The ReturnChapter Three - The Return Celestia levitated the radio down and - in exchange - levitated Rick up. She walked to the door, but was startled by the sound of the lock clicking, and the voice of Twilight Sparkle. "HAHA! You have fallen into my obvious trap! if I had known that you were this stupid, I could have just dangled an apple from the ceiling. Most subjects come out of suspension terribly malnourished, especially after testing like you did. Congratulations on packing on a few pounds." The floor opened below her hooves, and Celestia fell, still holding Rick . Her wings beat maniacally, but the air whistled through her feathers, and her speed remained unhindered. She landed in a blue funnel made out a liquid-like energy. The funnel trapped her and moved her to a huge round sphere that floated around in the empty space. A door opened in front of them, and the funnel forced her inside. Once inside, Celestia saw the big metal body of the core that called herself Twilight. "Ah, you are here. I see you made a little friend." Twilight looked at Rick. "Well, I don't mind. You're the one who told me to make friends." She said with a chuckle. "Look at those cores," Rick whispered to Celestia, "we've gotta remove them." "I'm not deaf, you stupid ball." Celestia looked at the five cores that hang on Twilight's metallic body. "Oh no no no no no don't even think about it!" Twilight panicked. Celestia smiled deviously and shot two portals, one on the wall and one on the ceiling. She galloped through the portal and flung herself at Twilight. On her way past, she managed to bite one of the cores. it was a soft voiced core with a yellow eye. "Uh...lady...would you...please...put me back in? Bad things will...uh...happen if am not...with her." The core said, with a shy tone that reminded Celestia of somepony. "Yeah, now crush it!" Rick said with a sadistic voice. Celestia dropped the core and crushed it with her hooves. The core screamed in agony as Celestia's hooves colided with it. "Central core corrupted at 20%." The voice of the announcer said. "Are you happy now? You just murdered an innocent core! YOU MONSTER!" Twilight yelled, with a slightly changed voice. "You're going to android hell." Celestia heard the sound of pipes and wires connecting to the floating room and the room began slowly filling with a blue gas. "By the way that core you killed? I plugged it in because it stopped me from filling a room with deadly poisonjoke gas while I was filling a room with deadly poisonjoke gas. No need to go anywhere, just sit tight while I warm up the joke emitters." A screen popped out of the wall with a timer that started counting down from five minutes. "I'm going to kill you, and all the cake is gone, and the laughter core will get sad, because you can't come to her party because you'll be dead." Celestia placed the portals on the other side of the wall. "You don't even care, do you? You heartless, selfish, fat, fatflank." Celestia galloped trough the portals and flung herself again. This time she bit a core with an orange eye. "Well howdy dowdy, Princess. You look mighty tired, and ah don't lie." When Celestia landed, something else fell off of Twilight's mechanical body. The robot peered down at it, ignoring Celestia for a few moments. "Hey, time out. What is that? That's not a core. I don't even know what that does. Do you? Let's be honest," "Ah already am." The core in Celestia's mouth whispered. "Neither of us knows what this thing does. Fatflank, would you mind stuffing that in a corner or something? I'll deal with it later." Celestia spit out the orange-eyed core and destroyed it, ignoring Twilight's request. "Central core corrupted at 40%." Something exploded on Twilight's body and a core fell off. "Oh good. More stuff falling from me." Celestia galloped to the fallen core. This core had a light blue eye, and it surveyed her when she picked it up with her magic. "Oh my, darling, you look simply horrible in that jumpsuit. It makes you look quite...uh...bulky." "See? Even the generosity core thinks you're fat." Twilight laughed. "Enough! I AM NOT FAT!!!" Celestia screamed from the built-up anger. She raised her forehooves and smashed the core with a satisfying CRUSH. "Central core corrupted at 60%." The voice of Twilight changed from slightly robotic to a more soft but creepier voice. "You know what you are. You are a lazy pony that sent six ponies to fight your own sister, a dragon and the spirit of chaos," two robot hands came out of the wall and grabbed Celestia, wrapping their shining claws around her body. Twilight lifted Celestia up so the two were face to face. "And what were you doing when we where fighting evil? Sitting on your throne, on your fat flank, laughing while drinking some fancy drink?" Twilight hissed. The claws tightend their grip on Celestia, and she felt some of her ribs brake. "Oh, I'm sorry. Did that hurt? Yes? Good! The thing is, I still am your friend." Celestia lifted an eyebrow. "Have I ever lied to you... I mean, in this room?" Celestia simply shot another set of portals. "Maybe you should marry that gun if you love it so much. Do you want to marry it? WELL I WON'T LET YOU! How does that feel? Does it feel mean? Good!" A pink-eyed core lit up on Twilight's body. "Hey! How is the poisonjoke deadly anyway?" "You're on my side!" "Yeah. I know. Hey, is that a portal? What's that noise? Do you smell something burning? Oh, look at that thing! No, that other thing! Oh! You're the pony from the tests! Oatmeal!" "Laughter core! Be quiet!" "You know, Twilight, you're a meany pants. I'm leaving." With that, the pink eyed core ejected itself from the body. "Caaatch meeee haha!" The core yelled with joy. It fell on the ground, imploding from the fall. "Connection lost with core 42. Warning! Central core corrupted at 80%." "Alternate core detected." "That's me they're talking about! I'm famous." Rick said. "To initiate a core transfer, please deposit substitute core in the receptacle." "A core transfer," Twilight gasped. "NO! STOP! I forbid you to do that!" An odd twig of machinery slid out of the ground, stopping just above the floor. Rick rolled around in his metal shell to propel himself to the receptacle. Celestia felt the effects of the poisonjoke, becoming sleepy, and seeing her fur and mane becoming pink. Rick managed to plug himself into the core receptacle with a happy yell. "Does the substitute core agree to the transfer?" "Yes!" Rick yelled. "Yes!" "Does the installed core agree to the transfer?" "No! No I don't!" "Oh, yes she does." Rick added. "Stalemate detected. A stalemate resolution associate is needed to resolve the stalemate." A button appeared in a small room behind Twilight. Twilight dropped Celestia from surprise. Celestia quickly portaled into the room behind the stunned Twilight. "Don't. You. Dare." The unicorn's core hissed. "You aren't even qualified to press that button. You'll get arrested. Let's think this through, survey your choices. You can attempt to transfer cores, which - judging by the age of this place - probably won't work anyway, and die from refined poisonjoke. Or, you can put down the gun, step away from the button, lie down, and surrender. I won't kill you, and we can just keep going on testing like nothing happened. Okay?" Celestia's head spun, and she collapsed. Her vision filled with black dots, and whatever she could see around them blurred into a rainbow mush. She let out a loud groan, her mane almost entirely pink and the last spots on her flank doing the same. "Oh, you've got to be joking." Twilight growled. "Just when we start doing something important." Somehow, Celestia staggered to her feet, knees trembling. With a desperate, wobbling wing, she managed to hit the button. The poisonjoke emitters sealed off, disconnected, and retracted into the roof. Twilight's metallic core would have had it's mouth gaping open if it had one. Rick descended into the ground. "This is going to hurt, isn't it?" Rick asked. "Oh, it's going to hurt. It's really going to hurt." Twilight liked the thought of injuring Rick. "It is going to hurt? Awesome! This is going to be cool!" Rick exclaimed, before disappearing into the ground. An hole opened under the body of Twilight, revealing small robotic arms with sharp claws. Celestia finally passed out from the effects of the poisonjoke and the last thing she heard was a horrified scream from Twilight. Rick was put into the mechanical body, and was in control of the whole facility. He grabbed the Twilight core and held her before him. "And who's the boss now, eh? Who's the boss? I am." "I hate you so much... if... my friends were here, th...," Twilight didn't finish her sentence. "My... friends? M-m-my friends," she said slowly, as if she had never said the words before. "What are... friends?" Rick ignored her and shifted his look to the passed-out pony. "You and I are going to have a little adventure." He said with a sinister growl. ^--- Entry 6 "Are you ready to begin ze test?" "Yes, the radio is recording. I will write down and narrate every thing for future generations." "Ja, ja. Just turn on ze teleporter." "Okay. Begin test one. I will now put our test subject, a small black soul gem, in the device." "Are you sure it iz safe for us to use that?" "Oh, of course it is. it isn't even filled." "Okay... let's begin the test." "I will now turn on the power." "The machine seems to emit a strong-" "By Luna's mane WATCH OUT!" "MY PRECIOUS! I WANT!" "Atmosphere! I thought you killed all those diamond dogs." "I did, but i think tha - look! The dog has trapped himself in the teleporter!" "Atmosphere, stop ze machine." "I can't, but we must hurry to the receiving end." Entry 7 "My goodness, we have done it. We have teleported a living organism." "Open ze device. I want to see it." "Oh, my... it looks like...like... a combination of a diamond dog and an ursa minor." "Capture it. I want to experiment on it." "Yes, Ununpentium."
Chapter of ChattingEntries preceded by a [ -- ] would be IceOfWaterflock Entries that are not preceded would be grox LALALALALALALALALALALALALALALOL --...You make a good point. --Ooh, and rainbows. --Did you know if you kill a kitten, the Cute Gods take pity on the kitten and fulfill it's last wishes by blowing up a raccoon and turning it into a rainbow? Strange, isn't it? --So, what you're saying is that Rick is going to be a possibly smarter Wheatley? (Damn, I miss him) In other words, TWiTATOS will get speared on a portal gun - after Rick leads Celestia on a winding path of broken, rusty, hanging steel bridges, that include detours to what is claiming to be a deer and is actually neurotoxin? Rick will become just as corrupt as TWiDOS, and set out to kill Celestia and, indirectly, TWiTATOS, all the while, TWiTATOS is slowly remembering her friends and past, which she had forgotten after becoming an omnipotent robotic demigod? There will be a massive fight with bombs, neurotoxin, and a few extra cores thrown in for good measure, not to mention assorted goo, a couple of 'different' turrets, one large bowl of witty commentary, and a beeyatch being sent to the moon - without the presence of a certain yellow fruit? In the meantime, Luna continues to struggle with explaining where the hell her sister has gone and moving the sun, the rest of the Mane Six try to make a plan, and the Cutie Mark Crusaders buck logic and see if they can get Cutie Marks for breaking the laws of physics? In extraordinary descriptive HD detail for maximum imagination? In other words, I think I can do something while you're off adventuring, yes. -- -- -- -- -- -- -- yea i gues it makes sense. but i would never get angry if you write stuf in here(; and i think its funier if we put TWiDOS in a lemon. cool picture Celestia looks bald without her crown --You should see the variety of hairstyles she tries to cover it up with XD --TWiLEMONDOS yay~ you know am going to give Celestia that jumpsuit. can you take a look at the begining of chapter 2 please. and i like what you wrote. what fell down? whe will nover know. --halfway through the next chapter: TWiLEMON: "Oh. I figured out what that thing that fell off was. It wasn't vital. It made horseshoes for orphans. And you deactivated it. Way to go, hero." --And: [In a control room, Celestia turns on a radio] "Entry two-hundred. It's seemingly impossible to get a reaction from the mainframe controlling this place. She - well, we think it's a she - simply watches us. Doesn't speak. Just... watches. [In the distance] "Sir? Sir!" "What, Maxis? I'm recording. This better be important." "The robot has responded, sir." "To what?" "We were talking about testing the firewall, and she... she's repeating the same thing. Over and over. Come on, bring the recorder." [Sound of hooves on tile] "My god, Maxis." [Feminine voice] "Welcome to Aperture. Please begin testing. I'll try to forget Chell -szkt - Chell! Chell, gone forever! Neurotoxin and poison joke! Turrets and thermal discouragement beams! The companion cube! Oh, the companion cube! [shouting] GOODBYE, CAROLINE! GOODBYE, MR. CAVE! GOODBYE, EVERYONE [voice fades into loud static, crackles for a few seconds] Welcome to Aperture..." "See, sir? Continuous loop. Your recorder is still on, you know." "Oh, da-" [recording ends] --played around with the jumpsuit mentioning. --Odd mechanical nub mystery solved. --Oh, don't delete the wall of story text. I don't have it saved yet. --And I really like the TWiDOS and Chellestia picture. With the cake. Don't know why. Fun to draw though. --^I just read that in Wheatley's voice. --Personally, i think we should publish this chapter as an Appendix, with our conversations. It'd be hilarious. From now on, keep this conversation intact. I'll save it and publish it later. Discussions of the Writer and Editor maybe. Or something. sorry for deleting the text. --No problem here. WE'LL JUST HAVE TO WRITE MORE MWAHAHAHAHAHA ideas for story the laughter core survives twilight will be put into a lemon rick will be the new central core and turns aperture into a big dangerous adventure parcour test the loyalty core makes twilight and rick not leave aperture --I got bored of the old cover and made a new one :/ --So, we just don't want the Pinkie Sphere to die. Because it's awesome. TWiLEMDOS. Rick is more dangerous than a moron. And Loyalty binds TWiDOS and Rick to the testing? --I was kinda thinking that TWiDOS would get back into control and slam Rick into a ponybot for endless testing and the GLaDOS part of her doesn't want the facility to get all run down, so she stays behind to fix it up. --"I'll call the lift." Twilight sighed, a smile sneaking into her voice as her real body became reused to the cords and metal plating. "I'll meet you at the surface." --Celestia couldn't hide a grin as she trotted on the lowering platform. "It's good to have you back." --Twilight's smile wavered, a slight frown crossing her muzzle behind her mentor's back. "Y...yeah. Great." --The Solar Princess turned around, waving a hoof to tell Twilight she was ready. --The lift began to rise, the metal gears underneath grinding. "I'll miss you, Celestia." --"I'll miss you too - what? What do you mean?" --"I mean goodbye." Twilight whispered, her voice still audible as the speakers reengaged. The metal armor latched in place, lifting her into the air from her haunches. The last piece of armor clicked into place over her eye, the yellow bulb flickering a few times before staying on with a yellow shine. "I can't leave this place. I am a part of here now." --"But I.. I can't leave you here!" --Twilight shook her head, spinning around in a slow circle. "You can, Celestia. Come down and visit once in a while, would you? I promise not to make you test again. Keep the long-fall boots. Never know when they might come in handy." --"No! I order you to bring this lift down!" --Twilight almost considered it, before shaking her head. "I can't do that, Celestia. Aperture Science protocol insists I remain in control of the facility." --I can't stop her... Celestia dipped her head, folding her angry wings. "Goodbye, Twilight." --The suspended unicorn smiled, waving her cyborg hoof. "Goodbye." --TA-DA! aww thats so sad and i like it (: --Why thank you --AND I'M GETTING WIFI NEXT MONTH! SQUEE! your ending but 20% more sadnes The suspended unicorn smiled, waving her cyborg hoof. "Goodbye." a small tear ran down the cheak of Twilight, knowing that somwhere deep inside this was't her choise. she looked back at the core with the rainbow colered eye. --OH DAMN --But I think it would have a cyan eye. --And the end of The Return - I think Twilight shouldn't remember her friends immediately, more like a slow, gradual process. Also: --Celestia glared at the robot newly in control, the Twilight half showing obvious signs of panic. [note: this is before the scene up there^ and relates to GLaDOS's corrupted memory] "Stop!" --It seemed almost gentle, the voice that replied. "No, Chell. My plan was to destroy you, all along. You were going to come back. I knew it. I KN-KNEW IT!" --"I'm not Chell!" Celestia yelled. "I'll never be her!" --The robot paused, the poisonjoke emitters sputtering out. --"I'm not her. I don't know who she is. Or who she was. You can run me down to the knees, test me again and again, throw me into the path of stray bullets and control my every movement. I'll never be her. She's gone. She's been gone for a long time. It's been over a thousand years. Ponies... they just don't live that long." --"She was not just a pony. She was my best friend." --"Then why are you doing this to me?" --"Because she's gone." The sad tone on the voice faded, replaced by anger. "If she was here, I wouldn't bother with you! You're nothing!" --"No. I am something." Celestia whispered. "I'm the pony who's just as immortal as you." --And an alternate ending. --"I can't control myself, Celestia! Get out!" --"I'm not leaving you, Twilight!" --"I'M GOING TO KILL YOU! PLEASE, JUST GO!" --"I'm not... letting you... suffer for... forever..." --"I'll be fine!" --"Twilight, I know immortality. And I can't let you suffer through it." --"Please go..." --"I have to kill you, Twilight. You told me yourself - you're bound to this place." --"No! I don't want to die!" --"It's your only freedom." --Twilight gaped in horror at Celestia's glowing horn, and felt the magical grip around her neck tightening. "No, Celestia please I can't breathe!" --"Goodbye, my student. Goodbye, Caroline." --There was no reply. damn thats a hard thing to do --I don't know why I'm so good at depressing endings :/ . Are you thinking abut entering the contest? --Also, I might not be on as often - until the beginning of March - because my computer is beginning to reject the internet stick. Again. i dont want to enter the contest. and i like your endings(: --I'm typing on my friend's iPhone, so this will be short: A) I hate my computer and B) I'll be online again as soon as possible. thats fine --Okay. Using another computer. So... what;s happening next? In the story, I mean. Like, are you writing it and I'm looking it over, or am I writing it and you looking it over? I think i have a little break. so i can think about the story. somthing with rick making deathly test chambers and the pinkie core(: --Kaykay. So... I'll go bang my head of the keyboard now! FOR CREATIVITY! thank you for making a beginign. i will start this weekend (: --I think that "I'm so friggin' lemony." may be the best line I've ever written. --What's up with the new story? What's it about? --Hey look what I found http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=Ivl4fY4Gtow dont know just some idea floating around in the vast emtynes of my head --Vast and empty? I recommend rewatching all the pony episodes so far (+2 days worth!) and Dr.Horrible's Sing-Along blog, and then scour the internet for pony themes, or bang your head off the keyboard and see if any words show up that are [fireworks] INSPIRATIONAL [/fireworks]. Of course, that's what I do... I think it's working :/ --Oh, hey, I've decided we need a song. 'Still Alive' parody. Just thought I should warn you. beautiful song. if you dont mind am going to put it on my deviant art :D --Yah, no problem. Wait... I've already seen it. It's cooleo. --Oh, I hate to do this, but I'm going to ponify me and my friends to ask something: --Let's say I'm Discord. I'm the variable, the one who doesn't fit in and who believes that if you can't be yourself, you shouldn't exist. Let's stuff in my friends as Pinkie - the one who can make everyone laugh; Applejack - the one who could kill all of us if she wanted to, and she doesn't; Rarity - the one who designs; and Celestia - my counterbalance, who just wants me to shut up, stay in line, and act normal. --You can probably tell who this is about. --The thing is, every single year, Celestia basically tries to send me into exile. I - on my own, despite what she said - made Applejack my friend during our last fight. Now that we've gotten along again, Applejack has become part of the other group. Rarity would also be by my side, but she has another group of friends that she prefers; she was with them first, and that doesn't upset me. --It's the fact that Pinkie and Applejack are closer to Celestia than they are to me, unlike Pinkie being in the middle and Applejack leaning back to me. --Again, this wouldn't bother me, I have no problem with other pony's decisions. --But Celestia and I are constantly at each other's throats. I've realized now that I don't give a buck if this gets published with everything else. I really don't. Don't delete this. --Anyway, if me and Celestia 'break up' (I'm not gay, at least, I don't think so) again... AJ and Pinkie will go along with her. I'm not really part of Rarity's other group, we don't have the same interests. It's just... I've been alone for a long, long time. I think I've taken it pretty well. I've never felt truly depressed, and I've never complained... until now. Because I honest to god don't want to be alone again. Nothing is worse than seeing your friend across the classroom and simply looking back down at your work. --I hated every second last time - but I could deal with it. It had always been like this. But now, after - and I quote - "[Discord], there's no way you'll make friends in high school. You're so mean.", I have made a friend of my own, and they've made a grand total of 0. It really bothers me. --In all honesty, there are days when I go to sleep thinking, I kinda wish I was Discord. I could show all of them that I don't need them... I could be myself and not be hated, etc. --I hate thinking like that, but... I'm finding it true. People are scared of me - I've been insulted and can come back with the bitterest of remarks. I'm not proud. But people hesitate to talk to me because I have such a bad reputation. I protect my friends to the best of my abilities. --Hell, maybe I am gay. --But at least it makes me sure that the Dis/lestia pairing is my favourite - chaos and harmony getting along. --I tried telling her once, but Pinkie and AJ are almost always there, and if they aren't, a couple of background ponies are, namely Lyra and Bonbon (sorry Bonbon, you're substituting a guy) who want to be a couple and are ALWAYS BUCKING THERE when nopony else is, and this is something I want to tell Celestia alone. --I just don't know what to do... on top of that, Celestia's constantly doing homework and can never go out for lunch (there's a plaza down the road from our school) so I can never tell her wothout a chance of being overheard. --Geezus, I've typed a lot, and I have half a mind to delete this... and I would, but I need somepony else's help. Sorry if I bothered you. Please don't delete this. You're the first person I've told. --It's 11:36. I'm going to bed. --G'night, --~Discord --You there? Hello? --Meh, the story hasn't been updated, so I'll assume your skyrimming. Thinks went better today, I guess. Either the addition of DQ fries (sweet mother of Celestia those things are delicious) or Easter chocolate (rarer and therefore better) has seriously improved my mood. Although I realized in gym that rhythm does not mean dance. I can keep a beat. I can in no way dance. I don't know half of my groups' dance and the presentation is tomorrow. I can't dance for the hell of beans. --I'm eating taffy with braces on. The pain is totally worth it. --Dear Princess Celestia: --I've never understood how people got chocolate eggs and marshmallow peeps out of a dead guy coming back to life. --Your faithful student, --LOL I'M NOT TWILIGHT --TAKE THAT YOU BANANA-LOVING BEETCH! --Arrivederci! --~Discord --Dear sweet Celly I need a blog. LOL I don't know how to make a blog. --I freaking love sugar. Why am I typing about Easter? I was having a serious moment! --I blame taffy. --... --Blame accepted. --I've never been able to make a waffle that doesn't use a toaster. Seriously. It's on my bucket list. --I can tell you're thinking it - I am not and never will be on drugs. I'm simply full of candy and ranting. You don't believe me? --All of these sentences have proper grammar. Screw that, druggies. --So, back to seriousity. Celestia wasn't ignoring me today. She noticed I was upset, and asked what was wrong. I considered my answers... and told her it was out of her control. Which, in afterthought, may have not been a good idea. There was a whole lot of 'what is it can I help are you sure I can't please [Discord] just tell me' which ended up with me cranking the volume on my iPod and putting my head on my desk. Note: Head-desk is extremely painful while glasses are worn. Luckily it didn't bruise this time. --Went out to DQ, as previously mentioned, with AJ. Got a drive back with her older sister and three backgrounders. I love fries. Kind of ironic that not a single one of us got ice cream. --Gave out Easter chocolate to all the background ponies I knew and ran into, Rarity, AJ, Celestia and Pinkie. --Cried a little in gym class when Celestia said if I wasn't going to keep dancing I could just sit out. I sat out. She said I was in the way and asked me to sit somewhere else. I did. Then she got all concerned and my entire group came over. I almost kicked them. --The Diamond Tiara (the beeyotch in the background) laughed at me across the gym. --I wanted to kick her too. --Then her entire group laughed at me. I told them quite loudly to 'shut the [buck] up'. --We had a supply today. She didn't yell at me because she saw me crying and she couldn't remember my name. --I'm making a very modified replica of Canterlot for my art product. It includes a very fat mountain with a dragon below it, a castle wrapped around the edge and the gardens/town itself inside the mountain. I'm going to paint little windows on the buildings in glow-in-the-dark paint. If I can find rainbow paint I'll do the castle windows too. --I can't find out how to make ponies smaller than the buildings... which are about the height of a quarter. GAH mini ponies. --I don't understand what I'm doing in math. Since when is isolating the variable and finding out what it is going to help me in life? The teacher's example was finding out how much money you're going to get back when you buy a burger. My reply was 'isn't that what the cash register is for?'. --He didn't yell at me either because no matter how pointless it is I'm good at math. --We can't blow anything up in science anymore because we've gone past chemistry and now we're doing electricity. We aren't even allowed to stick balloons to the roof. --Every single class I have has a 'student teacher' program where undergraduates can come in and teach for a month. That's probably why we can't blow anything up - my real teacher once set the fireproof tables on fire so they burned green. --Grade nine health has scarred me for life. I had to draw during the slide-shows because she never warns you when a picture is coming up. I drew a pretty epic dragon though, even if I probably failed the quiz. --The only reason I'm typing so much is because I have nothing left to do on the internet. --I just realized if I'm a girl signing these things as Discord, does that make me Eris? --My little brother is playing Wii Boxing. I feel sorry for the poor Miis fighting him. He's like a de-clawed tiger made of lightning and chainsaws. --Are you back yet? I'm adding hundreds of words to this chapter. It was at 2509 before this block. I know because that's how I've been checking to see if you've responded. --Will you be mad if this chapter has the most comments? I think it will. --SOLID WALL OF TEXT FOR THE WIN --I've been watching PMV's on Youtube for like two hours now. For those reading this: I recommend 'This Is War', 'In the Discord of the Night', 'Lights', 'The Stars Will Aid in Her Escape', 'Magic Will Bring the Light' and 'Young'. 'This Is War' made me get downloading software that took forever just so I could watch it on my iPod. Then I bought the song on iTunes. --Silly Youtube, making me purchase things. --Does anyone know how to put an eBook file manually onto an iPad? Is it possible? Do I need a special app or something? --Blarg. I'll probably be back in two hours or so, when I get bored again. It's 6:10. Let's see how long I last. --Whelp, it's 7:47. I should be doing homework. --Are you going to read this? It took a long time, you know. I'd like someone to talk to! --Grox, are you alive? Are you responsive yet? --Well, Dissy here managed to have a conversation in which I learned that my friends were pretty sure I was gay, due to the lack of boyfriends and/or crushes, and will be fine either way. For now, I'll just mess around in the neutral zone. With thousands of cats in my later life. --Are you reading this? --NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP --NEVER GONNA LET YOU DOWN --NEVER GONNA RUN AROUND AND DESERT YOU --NEVER GONNA MAKE YOU CRY --NEVER GONNA SAY GOODBYE --NEVER GONNA TELL A LIE AND HURT YOU --I will publish this if you don't respond by Monday. yes am alive and sorry if i didt respond for a long time i had a lot of fun in my free days of school. i like it that i am the only one who knows it but to be honest am not very good with that kind of stuff, i am just a lazy 16 year old kid, so sorry if i cant help you. --No, I got temperamental. I'm just 14 with no social life, so I have a lot of time on my hands. Good on you to have cool free days, though. --Also, I got my ponies on my iPad. --But yeah, I know it's a bit of a burden to bear. Just needed to vent somewhere. I don't mean to be insulting or anything, don't take it personally. --Hey, in apology, do you want a story idea? Would that be compensation? wait your 14 your better in drawing and writing than me hehe :D. you dont need to be sorry. if you need to vent again, am here (plz dont make it to long/complicated). i would like to hear your idea. maby whe could be socially awkward together (fluttershy brohoof) le idea for the ending: when Celestia escapes she find out that equestria is overrun with changelings and have corupted Luna and twiligh escapes with a teleporter :3. --Okay, I'm on an iPad. If something doesn't make sense, blame autocorrect. And yeah, the wall of text was kinda overwhelming, looking back. But here we go, writing walls of pony text instead. --"My friends..." Twilight muttered, spinning around in her robotic body, her own self - not her core - once again being suspended by the wires. "And you, my mentor. Kind of ironic really. The tester became the tested." --"Twilight, I understand that this is all new again, but we have to go. I fear something may be wrong in Equestria." --Twilight paused for a moment, robotic eye flickering. "Oh, it is." she replied calmly. "Do you know of any little insect ponies? They seem to be wreaking havoc." --"Changelings." Celestia hissed. "Twilight, call an elevator." --"Yes, yes, of course. they stole your jewelry, by the way. Pesky little things." --"Twilight! Elevator!" --The unicorn shook her head, the requested machinery landng with a clunk nearby. "I'm just going to shut down the place for a while. I'll just need a couple of minutes, be right up." --Celestia stepped not the elevator, seeing the somewhat eerie sight of the robotic monstrosity going limp as Twilight withdrew into the command chamber. The elevator continued unhindered, though, and it was a surprisingly short wait to the surface. --The Princess waited patiently for her student, rewarded by a low whir as a silver cap closed off the hole, and Twilight appeared nearby in a flash of magic. --"You up for helping me save Equestria?" Celestia asked. --"Buck yeah." its a good idea but i also like the idea of Celestia trying to kill twiligh maby celestia tries to kill twi but the nanobots in her bodt repair her and she escapes with the teleporter --Well then we should also have landsharks with the tails of scorpions and the claws of tigers and cannons strapped to their backs. Because that would be awesome. --I'm sorry, it's early and I shouldn't be thinking. --Oh, I was thinking about it, and this story is kinda coming to a close. I put up a new story that's just starter ideas, and none of them have been claimed. If you're stuck, feel free to check it out. --I can't scroll up because then your profile picture is staring into my soul D: good good the picture is working MUWAHHAAHHAHAHAHHAHA talking about strapping things on stuff....why dont give the body of twilight two metal wings and other coowl stuff i was thinking about rick sending celestia and twi to the moon......but than am only making the story longer...and i dont want to bother you could you please think about an ending with me --Yeah, sorry about the wait, I've been procrastinating. I think blasting off Twi/Tia would make a good alternate ending, but not for the main story. It gotten pretty distanced from the original Portal games - which is good, because exact copies are boring - but still holds the points that make the crossover. --I don't think Twi's wings should work, though, unless it's crucial to a major event. Either just for show, mounted with portal guns, or putting really sharp edges on them makes more sense. --And I won't be bothered at all, don't worry. --It's your story, so you can do whatever you want. :D --It's been a while since I was over here, and I was just wondering if we'll be going all-out on getting another chapter out soonish. No offense, but I normally - try my hardest - to get an update at around a week, unless I'm having a particularly bad writer's block. It just seems like it's been a while since this updated. --I edit this story so often and I have so many other stories to edit GAH sorry i had to learn extra hard for school and stuff. am gonna try to write everyday. --I know that feel bro. --On a flash-back-esque moment; Lyra's moving away :( But she's coming back for AnimeNorth next year (where we are all going to be velociraptors) --I have nothing to do ALL SUMMER so I guess I'll be on daily too. --IT'S 5:30 IN THE MORNING --THE STUPID MARE ISN'T HAVING HER FOAL --I AM HONOR BOUND TO STAY AWAKE UNTIL MY MOM COMES HOME --OH GAWD I WILL REGRET THIS --Mare had a foal, gold/chestnut colt named Midas. --IN OTHER NEWS my little brother was a jerk today :D (rant time) --He owns: DS, DSi, 3DS, Gamecube(x2), Wii (x2), Laptop, cellphone (x2), iPod Touch, iPad, PS3, XBOX 360 (+Kinect), and a bucnh of games/apps/etc. --I own: Laptop, cell phone, DSi, (can sometimes play the Wii) --And yet, he's been using my laptop non-stop to watch Minecraft videos. VIDEOS. I understand there's some impressive castles, but really? --He can also never finish a game. The only complete games we have are the ones I'm allowed to play (Pokemon, Spectrobes, Prof. Layton, etc.) --And he keeps wanting more stuff, and he keeps getting it! It's not like I ask for a new wardrobe of clothes every week, or spend hundreds if dollars on makeup... (side note: I like the clothes I have, and makeup is kind of stupid) --It just bothers me that he gets so much. He's a bit of an @ss sometimes, too. --He's also asking for another XBOX. (Our parents are seperated) --Oh, and because he got an A- on his report card in writing, he gets $100. I, meanwhile, am on the honor roll and... nothing. --I'm ranting. I'm sorry. I'm just pretty pissed off. wow, thats a lot of stuff. even i dont have that much shit (and am a bit greedy). he gets 100$ for A-? thats alot. you dont have to be sorry, am happy to know you trust me enough to tell me. pro tip: say to him to watch his vids on his friggin ipad!!!. on the other-hoof i have six-weeks free from school. TIME TO WRITE!!!! --I know, right? --And I'm going to fix a spacing issue in the chapters, so it flows better. The word counts might change. --EDIT: moved the discovery of the space-squeezing-box-thing to the same chapter that Celestia jumps into it. Seems to flow better for people who may have forgotten what happened exactly before. :yay -- -- -- -- -- --HAVE SOME PICTURES --That has to be the best chapter name ever. --Oh hey, off topic, let's say I'm writing a story. Character C has been switched with Character U. A bunch of C's relatives are about to be basically wiped off the surface of the earth, nearly-killing U in the process. Should U give the last of her life to C, and trust C to do what's right (1), or should C steal it for herself(2)? These characters don't really know each other, by the way. --Either way, C does the same thing, slowly turning into a monster. Which scenario works better? 1 or 2? for some weird reason i want C to become a monster, blame my twisted mind that always wants to corrupt ponies...why do i like to write about corrupted twilight? --*le shrug* --Also I went with neither (still the monster thing though~) It's my new story, Thirteen Reasons. So go read it and stuff. (That is a link) --UGH I HAVE THINGS TO DRAW FOR PEOPLE --UGH --UGH --UGH --PROCRASTINATION --UGH --And now I will spellcheck. --So... now what? Are we done? this will be the last chapter, and if i am gonna make a Sequel, i will try to write it withoud an editor --I'll read it! Anyways, what happened on your DeviantArt account? --And what'll the sequel be? --Wait never mind I'm pretty sure. --I'll make a cover for you anyway, if you want. --BASIBDWEVCVBIBQ I FIGURED OUT HOW TO DRAW RARITY'S MANE --I CAN'T STOP DRAWING HER IN A BEAUTIFUL MURDERER THEME NOW --IS THIS A BLESSING OR A CURSE --AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA its both :P --OKAY WE'RE BACK IN BUSINESS --Final chapter edited, changed it slightly (the kiss was kind of sudden, so I removed it. Most family members don't kiss on the lips anyway) --Kind of a sudden change so... is that what your next story will be? Changelestia? --(ALSO CRAP NUGGETS I WAS DOING CHANGELESTIA) Thanks for removing the kiss part. and whats next, i dunno. maby twidos breaking free and saving equestria or a story thats all about dr ununpentium. do you think i should write some more or release the final chapter now? --AND ALL SYSTEMS ARE GO --Time to publish "Chapter of Chatting"? --Can I get in some advertising space? --I make custom avatars for no price, and am willing to edit small projects ^-^ --I must finish this off with something entertaining... hmm... --See you next time, readers!
An Aperture Adventure (1/2)The first sense Celestia regained was her hearing. A rough crackle echoed from beside her. "Entry twenty. It's seemingly impossible to get a reaction from the mainframe controlling this place. She - well, we think it's a she - simply watches us. Doesn't speak. Just... watches." Another voice cut in, quieter, far away from the speaker."Sir? Sir!" The original speaker growled. "What, Maxis? I'm recording. This better be important." "The robot has responded, sir." The second voice panted. "To what?" "We were talking about testing the firewall, and she... she's repeating the same thing. Over and over. Come on, bring the recorder." Celestia could hear hooves on tile - a common sound around the palace - and the slow increase of mechanical whirring. "My god, Maxis." A third voice joined the mix, stiff and robotic. "Welcome to Aperture. Please begin testing. I'll try to forget Chell -szkt - Chell! Chell, gone forever! Neurotoxin and poison joke! Turrets and thermal discouragement beams! The companion cube! Oh, the companion cube! GOODBYE, CAROLINE! GOODBYE, MR. CAVE! GOODBYE, EVERYONE..." There was a brief quiet, in which the stiff clicks of a rebooting system could be heard. "Welcome to Aperture..." "See, sir? Continuous loop. Oh, before you yell at me, your recorder is still on." "Oh, da-" This seemed to be the last entry. The box - at least, it looked like a box - beside Celestia's head began clicking rhythmically, the tape inside whirring at the end of its loop. She groggl=ily got to her hooves, breathing a sigh of relief at the natural color of her coat. She had silently dreaded being pink forever. Ever since that doll - no, she had told herself never to think of that again. "Oh, good. You're awake. You seem to have a thing for sleeping for ages." Celestia's ears lifted and she looked around for her student, or the core holding her, wondering if the speakers in here were newer. "Down here." The voice sighed. "I already hate the way this is turning out to be..." Celestia tilted her head down slowly, until she was looking at her hooves. She couldn't see any sign of her pupil, just a small yellow fruit. Some part of her slowly-waking mind told her it was a lemon. "I know. Pitiful. Original, but pitiful." "Talking lemon!" Celestia shouted, backing up a few steps. "What in heavens was in that gas-" "I'M NOT A LEMON... well, kinda. Okay, I am a lemon. Let's put that aside for a second. I've been sitting on this floor for hours... would you mind just, y'know, GETTING ME OFF OF IT?!" The Solar Princess tiptoed closer, as if the lemon might combust, and gingerly picked it up, spinning it until she could see a jumble of wires and a single, glaring, purple lens. "Just so you know," the lemon growled, eye flickering from the energy use, "I feel very violated right now." "Twilight?" "I prefer TWiDOS. The mainframe wanted some respect." "Why are you so..." "Friggin' lemony? Ask the mainframe. Some 'revenge' program some of the cores have. She doesn't really know why they have it either, before you ask." "She?" "GLaDOS." The lemon replied. "An AI designed for testing human and robot subjects here." With a quizzical glance at the levitating fruit, Celestia scanned the room for any means of escape. All the walls were rejecting the portals, and there didn't seem to be any doors. The room began to shake, starting subtley and progressing until Celestia could barely stand. The entire ceiling exploded from the edges, peices flying in all directions. "Happy explosion day!" A gruff voice called out. Celestia's ears went flat. "Well..." TWiDOS sighed. "This may be more interesting than I thought." "CHEEZITS!" TWiDOS screamed, pulled back as Celestia reared away from the incoming rocket. "Putmedownputmedownputmedown..." Of course, the new AI decided that now was a good time to plunge the poor Alicorn into what looked like an endless pit. The floor panels folded up before Celestia had time to blink, and there was a single moment where she beat her wings frantically before she started to plunge down into th semi-darkness. "Ichangedmymindholdmeholdmeholdme..." Celestia manged to angle her body until she was alongside the wall, digging the boots on her hooves into it, trying to at least slow her fall. They skimmed on the surface, but made no damage, even possibly managing to make her fall faster. "Having fun? My adventure courses must at least be entertaining." Celestia landed in a test chamber with a large bridge, a storage cube and a pipe on the ceiling, and still holding TWiDOS. "Here, ya need this." A panel opened and a metal claw holding a portal gun came out. Celestia grabbed the gun with her magic and looked around for a logical place to put portals. "I would tell you where to place them, but I'm not allowed to." TWiDOS muttered. "Just wait until you solve this. It'll be worth it." Celestia saw a button and pressed it, a stream of orange jelly-like liquid came out. She placed a portal under the stream and placed one by the bridge. A stream of gel painted the bridge a bright orange. "Oh, by the way, that gel is very slippery. Be careful." TWiDOS added. Celestia grabed the cube and carefully stepped on the gel, but was immediately propelled forward as her boots slipped on the surface. As she sped along the bridge, a series of spiky plates behind her almost crushed her. She slid off the other edge of the bridge and skidded to a stop. When she was on the other side, she grabbed a cube and placed it on a button and a door opened. Celestia wanted to step in the elevator, but was surprised by an energetic pink-eyed core. "Hiya 'Tia!" "Whoa. I thought you were destroyed. You know," she mimed a much flatter version of the core, "crushed?" "Nah, you silly subject! I can't be destroyed! I'm Pinkie... Core!" "If this lemon had more power, I would explain to you that it really doesn't make sense." TWiDOS muttered. "Oh, silly! If you need more power, just plug yourself into that little gun! I've seen a human do it before." "A human?" Celestia asked. "Yeah, they're kinda like hairless monkeys that stand on two legs. They smell really bad." The core shook her eye in disgust. "Well, it's not really plugging in... more like skewering. Do lemons have plugs? Does the gun have a plug? Does..." The Pinkie Core rattled on in the background as TWiDOS looked up at Celestia. "They kinda built this place. So if you want to blame somepony, blame them. Not me. Or the mainframe - ahem - GLaDOS." TWiDOS explained. "Oh, oh, gotta go! The boss doesn't want me to stick around for too long!" And with that, the pink core retracted itself into the ceiling. Celestia took a step towards the elevator. "Wait! Wait..." TWiDOS snickered. "Hold up." The light flickered as she cleared her 'throat', and she shouted, "It was so hard finding that lever, wasn't it?" "What lever?" Celestia whispered. "I'm not falling for that!" Rick shouted back. "Not like that moron before me, who told you how to solve the puzzle by pressing the bu-" A loud crackle erupted from the speaker, and the lights flickered. TWiDOS burst out laughing. "-and get shocked." Rick finished, his voice trembling. "I hate you." Celestia smiled and stepped in the elevator to the test chamber.
An Aperture Adventure (2/2)The elevator stopped and Celestia stepped out. She looked around, and the only thing she saw in the chamber was a single box in the middle of the room. Celestia walked closer to the strange box and poked it with her hoof. The box did nothing. Cautiously, Celestia removed the lid. She looked in and saw a space that looked way too big for physics. "Oh. No. He. Didn't." TWiDOS hissed. "What?" Celestia asked. "That little moron used my compressed space technology." "Your what?" Celestia asked. "It's something i made when you were asleep. It's simple." TWiDOS explained. "You take some space, and compress it, so it fits in a smaller area. You don't need to understand." Celestia wanted to jump in the box, but was interupted by the high-voiced core. ''Hiya again. am here to say to you guys that the boss doest like it when you call him a moron. You don't want to know what happend last time. The replacement mainframe wanted to kill the subject because he was called a moron." Pinkie said sadly. "Why doesn't that little moron say that to my face?" TWiDOS hissed angrily. "Because he doesn't want to interfere with the the..." Pinkie was interrupted by a monitor that flickered on. "Because I don't have an excessive want to crush you like a little bug, that's why." Rick said, annoyed. "I need you for testing. And honestly, I wanted to release you two before, but this... this itch... it's driving me insane! AAARGH! Now leave me alone, and finish this simple test before I lose my temper!" "Oh, well... bye." Pinkie vanished into the ceiling. Celestia jumped in the strange box, and fell in a full-sized test chamber. The walls were black, and there was a huge pit full of blue gel. Celestia looked at the other side of the pit - there was a little table, with a chocolate cake on it. Celestia kept staring at it, and almost started to drool. "Hey? Hey!" TWiDOS shouted, clapping. "Snap out of it!" Celestia didn't hear her, and started to walk forward. She jumped down into the pit and bounced easily to the other side. "Hey, fatflank, ARE YOU DEAF?! Are you even hearing me at all?" Celestia started lick her lips as she slowly walked closer to the cake. She stood in front of the cake, counting the little strawberries and completely ignoring her little yellow friend. "Oh, you've got to be kidding me." TWiDOS whispered to herself. Celestia wanted to gently take a piece of cake, but an portal opened under the cake and the cake disappeared. "HA! Did you really think I would give you that, you foolish pony?" Rick said mockingly. The portal closed and Celestia just stood there, tears in her eyes. "Stop crying, you baby. It's just a cake." TWiDOS said, annoyed. A door opened and Rick started talking again. "Now that I know how I can encourage you, we can begin the real test." Celestia walked to the door. When she arrived at the test chamber, she looked around. It looked more like a temple from a Daring Do story than a test chamber. The walls were made of stone, and torches illuminated the room. She looked down. The floor was a lake of lava, and there were small islands covered with blue gel scattered through it. "Hey, I want to play a game. You may have heard of it. It's called 'the floor is lava'!" Rick said playfully. Celestia went to step on one of the islands, but TWiDOS interrupted her. "I think I know how to get out of here." "How?" Celestia asked. "We just have to make him mad. If he has the same flaws as the last replacement, he'll take us straight to the main AI room." "What'll we do when we're in the AI room?" "I...I don't know. Just trust me." Celestia carefully jumped from one island to another, making sure not to touch to lava. When she arrived at the other side of the lake, Rick started talking again. Celestia continued through the door, and into the short hallway in front of the elevator. "Mmmm... impressive. I hope you are ready fo..." "Hey, moron! Why don't you test my flank?" TWiDOS yelled. The lights in the hallway flickered on and off. "Wh-what did you just s-say?!" An artificial unicorn horn came out of the wall, sparking dangerously. "If you say one more word then... then I don't know what I'm going to do, but it's going to hurt." "Yeah, yeah, sticks and stones, you stupid excuse of an abacus." "Uh...Twi? I think you should stop now." Celestia said, tilting her head towards the dangerous, magical device. "Not now, Celestia, I'm insulting an idiot." "THAT'S IT!" Rick yelled. The metal horn powered up in seconds, and teleported Celestia and TWiDOS to another room. "It's the AI room~" TWiDOS sung quietly. "He really is a moron." Rick seemed rather calm, though, and the lower half of his eyelid was up in a smile. "Hello, my little pony." "Why are you so happy?" TWiDOS yelled. "Oh....I just found two little toasters especially for testin'." "Oh no....Celestia, I have a plan." TWiDOS whispered quickly. "What did you say?" Rick asked. "REQUESTING CORE TRANSFER!" TWiDOS yelled. "Please choose an alternate core." The announcer said coldly. "I CHOOSE CORE TW1L1GHT SP4RKLE!" TWiDOS yelled at the anouncer. Celestia patted her ear with one hoof, wondering if it would stop the ringing. "Why are you yelling?" "Main core, do you agree to this transfer?" "Well, duh." Rick said sarcastically roling his eye. A large white pod came out of the ground, containing the frozen Twilight. "Waking from cryogenic sleep: 20% complete." "What? No no no that was sarcasm!" The announcer ignored Rick. The pod opened, releasing icy mist. Twilight fell out on the floor. Celestia looked at the cyborg pony, and noticed a pair of metal wings on her sides. "T-Twilight?" Twilight didn't notice Celestia, she stood up and used the laser in her robotic eye to scan the room. Her laser stopped on Rick, and she frowned. "Alternate core found. Connecting." A cable came out of the ceiling and connected to a plug on Twilight's metal armor. "Connected." "No no no no, this is wrong!" Rick panicked. "This ain't gonna end well." "Stalemate detected. Stalemate official, proceed to the Resolution Switch." A room opened from the wall, with a big red button smack in the middle. Celestia noticed it and quickly cantered to the button. Two metal claws came out of the ground and wrapped their shiny metal fingers around Celestia. "Twilight! HELP!" Celestia screamed from the pain of her breaking ribs. Twilght noticed the screaming and used her enhanced magic to break the metal claws. Celestia crawled to the button, wincing with every move. When she arrived at the button, she wobbled onto her feet and pressed the button with her face. "No! NOOO!" Rick screamed as he lost the ability to control the facility. Twilight used her magic to rip off the adventure core and plugged herself into the the main AI body. Celestia slipped into painful unconsciousness.
The Cake Is A LieCelestia woke up on what looked like a elevator floor. She glanced around and saw two metal figures, watching her curiously. "Oh thank god, you're alright." Celestia looked up above them and saw Twilight, hanging from the ceiling once again. "What happened?" She asked. "You blacked out... again." Twilight let out a metallic-sounding chuckle. "You're lucky I could heal you." "Where am I?" Celestia asked. "You're in the AI room, sitting in the escape lift. That means you're free to go." Twilight said, smiling slightly. "Really?!" Celestia said, grinning. "Yes, you are free to go and be wherever you want, and you won't have to do tests anymore." The elevator started rising slowly. "This is my farewell to you, Celestia." Twilight said sadly. "What!? No! I can't leave you here! You don't belong here!" "Celestia, I am an omnipotent and almost immortal robot. I belong here. I'm part of here." Celestia looked at the only core left hanging on Twilight's mechanical body; the Loyalty Core. It stared daggers at the Solar Princess. "Twilight, this is not you talking. You need to get out of that body." "I am afraid that that won't be possible." Twilight responded firmly. "Aperture protocols says that the mainframe must always be plugged in. For the safety of myself and others." "B-but t-think about y-your friends! Your family!" Celestia shouted, sniffling. Twilight's eye twitched. "My f-friends?" The escape lift ground to a halt. "Yes, your friends. They are out there, waiting for us to return." "I-I don't need friends, I have those two." Twilight replied quickly, looking at the two little robots. "I-I have my tests and science." "Twilight! Stop this nonsense!" Celestia shouted, almost slipping into the Royal Canterlot voice. "I am sorry, Celestia. I wish I could change things, but I cannot." Twilight replied sadly. "Goodbye." The lift stared to move again, until Twilight was not visible anymore. Celestia could see turrets trough the windows in the shaft. They were singing what seemed to be a sad song in a language she could not understand. After some time, the lift surfaced, Celestia stepped out and looked around, it was dark, spotting her discarded regalia lying nearby. After hooking her shoes onto the Aperture jumpsuit and donning her crown, she remembered the location of Ponyville and trotted towards it. Her head dipped low, and tears filled her eyes. Celestia heard a noise, and she looked back at the lift. A small cake had appeared inside. Celestia smiled a little bit, levitating the cake next to her. With a sigh, she continued walking to Ponyville. Celestia exited the Everfree, and instantly saw Fluttershy's cottage. Oddly enough, all the windows were boarded up. She looked inside the cottage, and saw a decaying corpse of a changeling. "Oh no. Not changelings!" Celestia muttered nervously. Celestia turned around and galloped to the farm of the Apple family. The farm was boarded up with wooden planks as well, and when she looked inside, there were candles lit. Celestia knocked on the door. No response. "What is going on here?" Celestia worried aloud. Celestia heard a noice form the bushes. She turned around. "Who goes there!" Celestia called out. She felt a small tap on her shoulder and turned around. Before her stood a yellow mare with a pink mane. "Fluttershy, is that you? W-what is going on here?" Celestia questioned. The Pegasus looked around, putting her hoof up to silence the Princess. "I will answer all of your questions, but you have to come with me." Fluttershy started walking towards Ponyville, and Celestia followed her. They stopped in front of the town hall, and Fluttershy went in. Again, Celestia followed. "Fluttershy, please, tell me what's happening." Fluttershy made a movement with her hoof to come closer. Celestia lowered her head and in an blink of an eye, green flames enveloped Fluttershy and large fangs sank in Celestias neck. The Princess reared and shook her head around, trying to get the changeling to dislodge from her neck. The stubborn creature remained embedded in her flesh. She fell to the ground and slowly lost consciousness. ^---- Celestia woke up upside down in a green cocoon. She looked around, seeing that she was hanging in her own throne room surrounded by many other cocoons. Celestia squirmed around in her cocoon, straining to see the rest of the chamber. On the throne sat a hulking black pony, her body riddled with holes. Queen Chrysalis. She was peacefully feeding on the trapped ponies. "Get me out of here! You... you monster!" Celestia yelled. The Changeling Queen opened her eyes, turning her head to face Celestia. "Ah, you're awake." The insect queen stood up and walked to Celestia's pod. Her cat-like eyes seemed to shimmer in the faint light of the cocoon. ''I must say, you taste very good.'' The Changeling Queen said, giggling a bit. "You! What have you done? Where is Luna?!" Chrysalis tapped her chin. "Luna? Oh, you mean my personal slave." She said, grinning. "W-what? No! T-that's not true! Luna would never serve you!" Celestia shouted, this being one of the rare times she used the Royal Canterlot Voice. "Oh, but she doesn't have a choice." Chrysalis grinned and clapped her hooves. "Oh slave~! Would you come over here?" She sung to taunt the imprisoned sun Princess. A door opened, and a large changeling walked in. "What doth thee desire, my Queen?" The changeling questioned. "L-Luna? I-is that y-you?" Celestia said, practically shaking in her slimy prison. Luna said nothing. "What did you do to her?!" Celestia yelled. "Let's say I introduced her to my family." Celestia felt a strange feeling creeping up her body. "What h-have you done to me?!" Celestia yelled, shaking from the strange sensation. "T-this is not possible!" She stuttered, feeling like there were bugs crawling under her skin. "Your body is changing, Celestia. Soon you will be one of us." Chrysalis taunted. The non-existent bugs began crawl to the sun Princess's head. "No! No! No no no no no!" Her screams were muffled from the green slime entering her mouth. The hair of her coat dissolved and her skin turned into black armor. The skin around her wing bones dissolved and the wing bones removed themselves, making place for thin, fleshy, insect wings. "Goodnight, my child." Chrysalis planted a small kiss on the cocoon and walked to her throne, sitting on it and feeding on the countless ponies hanging on the ceiling of the throne room. -^--- Celestia woke up from the many voices in her head. "To the left! To the left!" "Yes!" "No sir, we have not found the rebels." "Keep looking!" "What was that?!" Celestia closed her eyes. "Argh! M-my head!" The voices faded out and made place for a new voice, a stronger one. "Ah, you're awake." Chrysalis cut open the cocoon and the new Celestia fell on the ground with a splash. She tried to stand, but she fell from the slippery slime that covered her body. Four hooves entered her field of view and she looked up. "M-m-mother?" Celestia asked while retching out the slime from her lungs. "Shh. Don't speak." Chrysalis cooed to Celestia, laying next to her. "Where am I?" Celestia asked again. Chrysalis started to lick slime from the newly born changeling. "Shh. Don't talk, just relax." Her voice took on a quiet, motherly tone. "But I... I need to..." Celestia was interrupted by Chrysalis, who placed a hoof over the Princess's mouth. "I told you to stop talking." The Changeling Queen demanded. "Now just lay still so I can clean you." Celestia closed her eyes and enjoyed the rough tongue caressing her hard but sensitive skin. She let out a contented sigh and fell asleep. --^-- Twilight closed her eyes, sighing. "Goodbye." ---^- Writer's Note An infinite amount of thanks goes to IceOfWaterflock (Me! :D ) for editing my story. Now I want you to ask you something. What should I do next? The sequel where TwiDOS saves Equestria. A prequel about Dr. Ununpentium and the Fillydelphia Experiment. My Elder Scrolls Crossover. Please comment with what you want. Notes from the editor: Thanks for reading this everybody, and we hope to see all of you again in the future! (Just remember, the watch button is the one with the eye on it!) ----^ END
