Applejack and the Golden Apple

by Lancelemur

Rating: teen
Tags: Random, Crossover, Alternate Universe
Length: 2172

Applejack finds an awesome apple that sends her to a different dimension. Jappleack's.

Applejack eats an apple that sends her to Jappleack's universe.
if you don't know Jappleack, here's the tumblr address:
http://ask-jappleack.tumblr.com/
BE WARNED: some forms of slightly dark humor in the tumblr

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2012-01-02 20:12:27 UTC

Chapter 1

Applejack wipes the sweat off her brow as she ceased her apple bucking for the day. She looks around, marveling her work as every tree around her had been bucked clean. "My, my..." she told herself. "That's some mighty fine applebuckin' if i do say so myself!" she praised her work once more. Yet, as she looked though the seemingly infinite acres of apples still clinging to the branches she saw something in the distance.. A shining light, compelling her to come closer. "What in tarnation is that?" she whispered to herself. She ventured on to the light and found the cave she used to play in as a fillie. A flood of happy memories overtook her. The splashing in the puddles, catching critters just to prove her athleticism. The old "no colts allowed" sign was still staked in the ground. She giggled in nostalgia as she wandered farther in. The light in the cave grew and grew as she ventured farther in. Suddenly, as she peeked around the corner her eyes grew at the treasure. a literal golden delicious sat in the corner, dirty, yet shining like the sun despite the lack of light. "Well i'll be!" her voice echoed in the cavern "How'd this thing get here?" she wondered. She examined it. It looked edible, succulent, juicy, a better apple than she could ever grow in her life. "HOOO-EE" she howled in excitement. " This apple is the best lookin' one I've ever seen! I can't wait to see what it tastes like!". She quickly bit into the metallic apple. A sudden wave of feeling rushed over her, making her hairs stand on end. "Woah...." she said, surprised. "Why'd it get so cold all of the sudden?" she wondered. "Eh. must be a bad apple." she said as she tossed it aside, wary of its odd taste and sheen. As soon as the apple hit the ground, a noise louder than an oncoming train sounded throughout the cavern. "WHAT IN TARNATION?!" she yelled above the noise as a portal arose in place of the apple, and started sucking everything in..

Chapter 3

"But... Discord and...." the screams of the other ponies rushed to her again. "Nevermind about that, sugarcube! We gotta go!" she said as she dashed away with Twilight at her heels. "Lets go to Fluttershy!" The twilight said to applejack "Okay, hun! Lead the way!" Applejack told her as Twilight jumped in from of her. They arrived at fluttershy's shack a moment later, huffing and puffing. "Fluttershy!" Applejack called out as Fluttershy looked over. Once more Applejack noticed something.... Off about her. "Yeah?" she responded in a gravelly voice. That took Applejack off guard. She shook her head in amusement. "Fluttershy? Did you mess in the poison joke again?" she questioned her friend. "Hey, hey, hey" she told Applejack. "Don't go in my shed." She said in that odd voice of hers as she walked toward her shed. "FLUTTERSHY" Applejack protested, yet Fluttershy kept moving. Applejack sighed, "She's just having a moment, she'll come to." Applejack drawled. "But we gotta get movin! Come on Twilight! we're goin to Rarity's!"

Chapter 4

Applejack led the way to Rarity's, her hooves almost giving out from the exhaustion of running around the outskirts of Ponyville. She finally got to Rarity's shop, the screaming of other ponies giving her the will to go on. She knocked on the door with nearly the last bit of energy she had left. She fell to the ground and hoped Rarity would come to the door from such a feeble knock. after what felt like an hour, she finally heard footsteps approaching. she looked up, her eyes heavy with exhaustion. she saw a very large figure through her blur, and heard "Oh Jappleack!" just as she succumbed to her exhaustion.

She awoke slowly. The screams of the other ponies had stopped. She attempted to move, but the soreness of her muscles prevented her from anything moving, so she sat there, powerless. Down the hall she heard more footsteps. She hoped to herself that it wasn't this new twilight. Her nightmare was revealed that it indeed was this twilight coming down the hall. "Hey Jappleack!" she yelled to her. "You're feeling better, today aren't you huhuhuh??" she blurted out interrogatively. Applejack looked at her in surprise. "Did you just call me... Jappleack?" she asked twilight. "Well yeah, silly! That's your name!" she replied. Jappleack looked over her. "Sugarcube... what happened to you? You aren't yourself..." she said to twilight. "What are you talking about, you crazy apple muncher??" Twilight said once more to her. "Hold on, sugarcube. I still got more questions to ask you." Applejack told her. "You called me Jappleack. My name ain't Jappleack, TWILIGHT. Now where in tarnation did you get that name?". Twilight glared at her, stupefied. "I.... I...." Twilight stuttered. "You heard me, hun. Where am I? And where the buck did you get that name?". Twilight started inching out of the room. "Don't you go anywhere!" she commanded Twilight. "My, my" a deep voice piped from the other room, "what ever is all the yelling about?" It said. "uhh... Rarity?" Twilight said.

Chapter 5

Stomping came from the hallway, it seemed. "What is it, dear?" The voice asked Twilight. Suddenly, around the corner came an unusually shaped grotesque blob of white. "R-Rarity..." The unusual looking Twilight stammered, "I think something happened to Jappleack...". "Rarity?!" Applejack exclaimed, once more stricken with surprise as her mouth hung. "Well of course, m'dear! It is only I, the loveliest of all ponies!" The disfigured blob said. "Yeah... beautiful..." Applejack tried to pass off. "Well of COURSE!" Rarity flaunted herself, her fat rolls swaying with her movements in a grotesque fashion. Applejack nearly vomited on her pillow. Suddenly, her realization came back to her, "What happened to ponyville?!" She questioned everypony. "Oh, he went away bored as always." Rarity told her. "But the elements..." Applejack said once more with confusion staining her face. Rarity leaned on her bed, the frame creaking under her weight, saying,"Oh dearest Jappleack-" "WHY DOES EVERYPONY KEEP CALLIN ME THAT??" Applejack interjected. "Dear! It's your name, is it not?" The morbid blob of white said to her. "No! It isn't!" Applejack told her, wincing as she got out of her bed. "Now, i'm just gonna go outside, and y'all better not follow!" Applejack said in her thick accent. The other two ponies glanced at each other, yet stayed in their place as Applejack walked out of the hallway and out of Rarity's door, slamming it shut behind her.

"Now I gotta go back to the farm and just see if that spoiled apple is there again.." She set her objective, not eager to taste the metallic apple again. "I just need to get outta here..." she whispered to herself as she trotted along the outskirts of ponyville, not wanting to see the destruction or ponies inside.

She stepped onto her plantation, making a beeline for the cave saw in the distance. "HEY FAGGOT!" She heard in her direction. Applejack turned around to a horrible sight.

Chapter 6

It was HER standing defiantly across from her. Yet, like twilight, she looked a little more.... deformed. "WHAT R YU DOING U FAGET?!" The deformed pony interrogated. "Why, I'm just goin to that cave over yonder." Applejack said defensively. "Oh, well ahm jes' goin' ta the cave o'er yonder." The rude pony mimicked. "BITCH I'M JAPPLEACK AND U PONY FAG BETTER GET OFF MY ORCHARD BEFORE I SHOW YOU HOW IT'S DONE IN THE SOUTH!" She yelled at Applejack once more. Applejack stepped back. "Wha- You? Everyone has been saying i'm you..." She suddenly realized. "AND WHY SHOULD I LISTEN TO THOSE OTHER PONY FAGS?! WHY THE HELL WOULD THEY THINK I'M AN UGLY-ASS PONY?!" The rude doppleganger yelled again. Applejack looked down, her feelings being torn to shreds. Keep calm, Applejack she told herself. They're only words. She turned away and galloped as fast as her fatigued muscles could take her. "WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU GOING?!" Jappleack screamed again, pursuing her like a jaguar would it's prey. Jappleack pressed on, as Applejack's hooves were near giving out. "DON'T GO NEAR MY DAMN APPLES, YOU BITCH!" she screamed to Applejack. Applejack looked behind her to see a terrifying sight. Jappleack looked ravenous, her eyes wild with rage as the obscenities continued to blurt out of her mouth like water from a waterfall. The adrenaline coursed through Applejack, driving her to the edge of the plantation. The gate was in sight as Jappleack pursued her even more, nearly grabbing her heels as she neared. Applejack mustered nearly the last of her energy and bucked with all her might. The evil, dirty-mouthed pony was rocketed back into a tree, the apples falling on her head as a large lump appeared. Great thinkin', dear Applejack told herself as she lurched forward. Finally, she reached the cave. The sign in front read "ALL FAGS KEEP OUT" in scratchy, backwards letters. She walked into the cave, retracing her steps from before, and found the apple there. "YOU FUCKER" she heard and turned.

Chapter 7

It was Jappleack... again... Oh brother Applejack thought through her head as the furious pony stumbled closer to her. "You.... You did this to me..." Jappleack told her. Applejack glanced at the apple, seeing the bite mark that had already been taken out of it. Jappleack traced her eyesight back to the apple. She became more furious than Applejack had ever seen. Jappleack pulled from behind her a club-like stump. "Applejack lunged for the apple beside her as Jappleack cried out in her fury, swinging the branch at her double. Applejack ducked just in time to dodge the makeshift club and bite the apple on her way down. As if the portal had known her danger, it opened almost immediately. Applejack threw herself in. To her dismay, the evil Jappleack followed, her club raised above her, ready to strike. Applejack gasped, falling deeper into her infinity. The bit of color shone at the end of the tunnel. You've done this once before, sugar. You can do it again... she told herself as she closed her eyes.

A thump was all she felt as she awoke against her usual napping tree. She was sweating and gasping for air as she glanced at her surroundings. All the ponies looked normal, the sounds of laughter and play echoed in the streets of the normal ponyville she had grown to love and care for. She let out a breath, secretly hoping to herself that she wouldn't have to go through another dream like that again. Applejack got up and headed towards her friends house. Yet, an orange figure moved through the bushes. "Soon..." it whispered "I will have my revenge..."

Chapter 2

The force of the gales sent Applejack tumbling to her feet. She stuck her hooves into the ground, holding on for dear life as she struggled against the massive winds. Yet to no avail. The winds got stronger and stronger, Applejack holding onto her life as much as the dirt she had her hooves in. Her hooves started slipping, her back nearly touching the portal as it vacuumed the entire cavern. She started slipping in more and more. "No no no no no!" she said as her back became engulfed by the portal. She struggled, but finally, her hooves gave way and she was sent spinning into nothingness. No up, down, ground, or life. She was too terrified to notice these things, in fact, as a ball of color showed up at the end of this nothingness. Applejack screamed all the way to that color, and was knocked unconscious at the force of her hitting the soft grass.

She woke up once more in ponyville with a sigh of relief... "It was only a dream" she told herself as her heart pounded in her chest. "Only a dream..." she reassured herself. She suddenly felt a jab in her cutie mark and yelped in surprise. she turned around, saying, "You no good-" she cut herself off, as a slightly different twilight looked up at her with the weirdest grin on her face. "Oh twilight.." she giggled awkwardly. "What were you thinkin', sugar cube?". "Hehe" twilight said quickly "I have NO idea!! But discord is back!" she pointed towards ponyville as Discord himself walked into ponyville. But he didn't look like himself.. this discord was 20 stories tall with the bulk of a bodybuilder. He instantly started laying waste to their hometown as ponies screamed in terror. "What in tarnation?!" she yelled in surprise. "There ain't NO WAY he's back in this here town! We just banished him a few months ago! And what in the name of Sam hell is with him? He grew 20 stories at least! and half as wide!" she yelled.

"What are you talking about?" this odd Twilight said to her quickly said to her.