'When all the truth does is make your heart ache, sometimes a lie is easier to take'
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'When all the truth does is make your heart ache, sometimes a lie is easier to take'
MISSING
Applejack, last seen on 9/14 outside Sweet Apple Acres
If spotted, please contact Twilight Sparkle at the Ponyville Library
Upon catching sight of the flyer, a lavender unicorn placed a hoof against the torn and weathered paper, sighing as she read over the words once more. It had been well over a month since Applejack had suddenly disappeared from Ponyville, and as eager as they had been to eventually have her back, life had begrudgingly gone on. Rainbow Dash still had her weather to take care of, Fluttershy still had her animals, Rarity had numerous orders to fill, and Pinkie Pie likewise found herself busy at Sugarcube Corner.
And Twilight Sparkle? Her studies had gone on. She and the rest of the girls still missed Applejack terribly, of course - what pony wouldn't, after all? But time stopped for nopony, not even the princesses, and Twilight soon had been forced to accept that perhaps the earth pony was gone for good. They still remained hopeful, of course, but every additional day upon the calendar was another bit of diminished hope, the flame growing ever more dim.
There were still reports here and there of Applejack, all of them from various cities - an apprentice of a princess was not without power, and the unicorn had fully exercised it in her attempts to find her friend - but they were often fruitless, either being cases of mistaken identity, or simply being an illusion of sorts. It had been extremely disheartening, and even as Twilight trudged back to her home after running her errands for the day, she found herself wondering if it was still worth the time and the effort.
She grimaced as the wind picked up once more, throwing rain into her face, and she instinctively formed a small bubble to shelter herself from the elements. Even at a distance, however, something seemed different about her home, most notably the door... it was almost as if something was affixed upon the door. Curious, Twilight quickened her pace, sloshing her way through the mud and the rain as she trotted towards the library.
A bit of steel glinted in the distance, and just as visible was a red wax seal. Her heart was beginning to race now, and Twilight Sparkle quickened her pace once more. Her couriers never used red seals, not unless... !
"Applejack?!"
The unicorn broke into a sprint, her bubble dissolving as her concentration disappeared, and though her mane was quickly getting soaked from the downpour, it hardly seemed to matter now. All she needed was that letter hanging from her door, anything at all to maybe rekindle her hopes. She hadn't even realized just how far away her treehouse had been, not until her legs had begun to ache and burn, but... no, that hardly mattered now. The letter. The letter was all she needed.
Seconds ticked by, and even as her heart was pounding within her chest, she quickly found herself approaching the front door. Upon the door itself, an envelope had been stuck to the wood by means of a steel dagger - rather unusual, especially within the confines of Ponyville. The envelope itself, though damp from the rain, still appeared to be somewhat dry, and it had been sealed shut with a red wax stamp in the shape of...
"...an apple."
Her heart skipped a beat, and Twilight Sparkle hastily tore the dagger from the wood, tossing it into the mud beside her door before racing inside. This was it, this had to be it! News about Applejack, or even better, news from Applejack! As the door slammed shut behind her, the unicorn hastily tore open the envelope and pulled out the letter within, reading its contents aloud.
"Dear Twilight..."
Dear Twilight,
It's odd, I suppose. To have spent so long with you and done so much at your side, and this is how I have to contact you. With a letter.
I should explain. I owe you that much, after all - you and the rest of the girls. You see, I'm not exactly Applejack. My name truly is 'Applejack' and, rest assured, I'm an earth pony, but everything else is a lie isn't what it seems. I'm not a farmer, and the Apple family? Not my family. I wasn't born and raised in Ponyville, Big Macintosh isn't my brother, nor is Apple Bloom my little sister, or Granny Smith my grandmother. They're just contacts It's difficult to explain, but I'll do my best. You do deserve it.
I work for a group an organization - old, almost as old as the Royal Sisters themselves. The job is simple enough. We help ponies in need, no matter what they need done, and with no questions asked. Of course, this has lead to me doing some horrific rather unsavory things over the years. I've killed more ponies than I'm comfortable with, both those who deserved it and those who didn't, and I've done a great many other things that would likely run the risk of execution within an Equestrian court. I've done terrible, terrible things what needed to be done, because it was my job, and because I knew of nothing else to do with my life.
And then you came along. I was sent out to Ponyville one summer, to help the Apple family with their work around the orchards. My job, and cover, were simple enough - I was to pose as a member of the Apple family, and to assist them until they no longer felt my services were required. I was settling in well enough, and then you showed up. You confused me at first - a pony from Canterlot, going on about her wild tales of 'Nightmare Moon's return', and how you needed to find 'the elements'. And I? I played along, solely for the sake of preserving my cover. I thought most of the town would see you as a bit of a nuisance, and that as soon as the Summer Sun Celebration was over, you would be gone.
And I was wrong. They embraced you, all of them did. When Nightmare Moon truly did show up, everypony looked to you for direction - including me. Nopony knew where had Celestia had gone or even how we were supposed to get her back, and yet you did. You seemed to know when there was none other to show the way. And so I followed you. I assisted you time and time again, and I grew to trust you, just as you no doubt grew to trust me. We became allies friends.
Even after all that was said and done, I continued to follow you and to do everything you needed to save the day because, for once, I wasn't the old Applejack. I wasn't somepony who had been forced to do unspeakable things simply to get by in life - I was a hero, somepony who was loved and adored, not just by the masses, but by ponies who I could depend on and could call friends. Ponies like you, Twi.
Everything comes with a price, of course. It's something I learned years ago, and something that, unfortunately, comes with the business. I knew I couldn't lie forever - not only to you, but also to my employers - and I knew that some day, the fantasy I had crafted for myself would come crashing down. Either you would find out, or they would, and whenever that managed to happen, I couldn't bear myself to face the possible reprisal. To face them would be a death sentence, for lying to them and violating the terms of the contract, but to face you and the others? I wouldn't be able to live with myself.
Which leads me to the present day - if you've received this letter, it means I've decided to call an end to it. Enough is enough. The charade is over. 'Applejack' needs to disappear for a bit. If I know you (and believe me, I do), then you've no doubt placed agents all over the entirety of Equestria, just to try and find lil' old me. As good as you may be at seeking, however, I'm better at hiding. I'll eventually reveal myself once more, after I've determined I can do so without having myself unceremoniously killed, but for now, you'll simply have to keep this to remember me by.
I can't even begin to imagine what you and the others must feel like right now, especially after reading everything I've written - no doubt you're angry, sad, or confused. I just want to tell you that I'm sorry - I'm so very sorry - for everything I've ever said and done that may have hurt you. I'm sorry for deceiving you. I'm sorry for forcing you to have a friend that never truly existed, and I'm sorry I had to tell it all to you like this. If you never want to speak to me again after all this, I don't blame you. I've done a great many despicable acts, but to betray somepony like this is among the worst.
Though everything I've said and done is essentially a lie, and though I continue to regret it to this very day, a part of me doesn't quite feel sorry for any of it. I may have lied to you, but look at everything you and the rest of the girls have accomplished. We've You've all saved Equestria time and time again, and you've all gone on to be highly successful in the things you love. I'm so incredibly proud of you and the girls - words can't even begin to describe it.
Just keep an eye out for me, I suppose. I'll show up again one day, and maybe then, you can truly get to know me for who I am. Maybe then, we can actually be friends.
Yours,
Applejack
P.S.
Just because you can't see me doesn't mean that I'm not there. I'll always be there for you and the others, one way or another. Think of me as a guardian angel of sorts.
With the letter finished, Twilight Sparkle slowly placed it upon a nearby table, her jaw working itself as she sought the right words. Applejack had... lied. Had been lying, to all of them, and none of them had been the wiser. This hadn't been the work of a discorded Applejack, this had been... honest and dependable Applejack. What made it all the worse was that it had been purposely done, and it had simply been passed off as 'helping them'.
The unicorn growled and pounded a hoof against the floor. "That little... !"
The nerve! The gall! To betray them, all of them like that, simply so she could help her guilty conscience? She had used them all! Lied to them, lead them along to believe the most terrible of lies, and for what? So she could atone for her sins? Such a pony was awful, despicable, a wretched creature that deserved no love and only the most horrific of punishments, and yet...
"...she was right." Twilight sighed and lowered her head, ears flattening. Applejack had indeed lied to them all over those many seasons, and yet... she had been right in the end. Lies as they had been, she truly had helped them all. They were all successful, the best of friends, and Equestria wasn't in shambles... yet. And all of it had been because of a few little white lies.
The mare made her way towards a window and placed a hoof upon it, sighing once more as she gazed out into the rain. Rather than hate her, the letter had simply made her miss Applejack even more, and the unicorn peered up at the clouds as she recited something the earth pony had told her after their encounter with Discord. "When all the truth does is make your heart ache..."
Outside the library, an unseen observer let out a sigh of their own, and soon slipped into the shadows once more... but not before uttering a phrase of their own.
"...sometimes a lie is easier to take."
