Traveler

by totallynotabrony

Rating: teen
Tags: Original Character, Cutie Mark Crusaders, Adventure, Princess Celestia, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Human, Other, Romance
Length: 21317

Sail is a pegasus. Andy is a nerd. Nika used to be a Russian intelligence agent. Hawker is a porn star. Jones works for the CIA. Shep flies the helicopter. Jeff is a mechanic. They fight crime. Usually.

Sail is a pegasus. Andy is a nerd. Nika used to be a Russian intelligence agent. Hawker is a porn star.
Jones works for the CIA. Shep flies the helicopter. Jeff is a mechanic.

They fight crime. Usually.

Published 2012-11-01 02:10:01 UTC
Last updated 2013-02-03 17:03:13 UTC

Chapter 1

Traveler

Third in the Sail Canvas Trilogy

The sun was low and flat behind a line of clouds pushing in from the west. The waves in the East China Sea were calm at the moment, gently rolling off the bow of the yacht.

I sat at the helm, relaxing a bit after work. Earlier I had been out touching up the boat’s paint. As the only one on the permanent crew who had wings, it was naturally my job to get the high places.

The boat had been built covertly on CIA and US Navy money. We still owed those two groups a lot of favors for that, but when you sail around in a weaponized pleasure vessel, all kinds of people come out of the woodwork to ask you for favors. For example, Equestria.

To my right was a mare named Apple Bloom. She and two others were aboard at the moment. They were some kind of special operations team. They didn’t talk much to us, and that was fine. We’d merely been contracted to provide transportation for whatever they were doing.

Despite being a pony myself, I had grown up in the United States. It made for interesting arguments with the TSA, although the new president we’d just gotten in the 2016 election had promised to change some of that.

I heard footsteps on the stairs behind me. Jones, our resident CIA agent, showed up on the bridge. She said, “Mr. Canvas, Andy wants your opinion on something in the CIC.”

I nodded and stepped away from the wheel, letting her take it. While the woman was not technically part of the crew, she had cross trained enough to handle simple things like steering.

Cassandra Jones was not an easy person to figure out. She seemed to have a drive to succeed, but had dropped out of medical school in her younger years. She was well known and respected at the CIA, but wanted to stay out of the spotlight. She wanted to be friends, but often wasn’t very pleasant.

Jones had come aboard several months earlier because the CIA thought that I and my crew needed to be watched more closely. She’d played a major part in derailing a terrorist plot to spread radiation on the east coast of the United States shortly thereafter, in the process becoming something of a celebrity. The attention was apparently not what she wanted, so she used her star power to get any duty assignment she wanted, which was right back with us.

I went down a level to the Combat Information Center, my hooves clacking on the stairs. Andy Newhart was there, running one of the computers in the CIC.

I’d known Andy since elementary school, only a few years after the dimensional doorways linking Equestria to Earth had opened. He was one of the few friends I had from school. On the boat he usually dressed casually, but at his regular job he was a Japanese professor at Old Dominion University and tended towards tweed suits and reading glasses. He had taken a sabbatical to sail the high seas with us, but written it off as “research.”

“Hey Sail,” said Andy, “we’re getting close to the holding point.”

I nodded. “All right.” I waited for him to go on. He wouldn’t have called me down just to tell me that.

“There are no signals coming from the site. It’s blacked out.”

The Equestrians wanted information on some suspicious activities going on at a location in China. It was near to the coast southwest of Dandong, at a place where we could hang around a while and have a look. The city was close to the North Korean border, on the northeastern end of the East China Sea.

“It’s not a well populated area,” I told Andy. “There’s no reason to be expecting any signals.”

He shrugged. “Fair enough.

I bid him goodbye. Since Jones was on the bridge, I figured I could spare a few minutes to walk through the boat.

I met Hawker Hurricane as I was leaving the CIC. She was British, a gamer, and a pornography actress. Most of those things interested Andy, and they were talking about getting married.

Hawker said hello to me and went to sit next to Andy. I headed down the passageway, finding our other two guests peering into a safety equipment locker. Their names were Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle, pegasus and unicorn respectively.

I had no idea what the two mares were looking for, but didn’t say anything. They were generally not very friendly, probably because I wasn’t either. I’ve noticed that I’m a stallion who is much better at dealing with people than other ponies.

In the galley, I found Nika Ivanova working on a meal. Not that any of us were really good at food preparation, but Nika was probably the best. She also wasn’t bad with the AK-47 she habitually carried slung over her shoulder.

I’d first met Nika on a business trip to Russia. At the time, she’d been working for the FSB, one of the agencies to replace the old KGB. We’d hit it off, and it had been partially her idea to start the company. I still didn’t have any official name for our little special operations group, but it didn’t seem to need one.

I had another, legitimate business, Canvas Shipbuilding. I catered mostly to the United States Navy. It was a good company that my father had built before he passed away.

In the last year or so, I’d had some major life changes that involved, among other things, working for the CIA on a freelance basis. I was able to get a good income from it, and it was certainly never dull.

The most exciting parts, however, were spent with Nika. Gag if you will, but she was the only one—pony or person—who I loved. We understood each other, and had surprisingly many things in common.

Yuck, was I really so sentimental? It’s not like we’d figured out how to have sex. Besides, with what we both knew about intelligence and weapons systems, we could talk for hours before ever breaching the subject of something uncomfortable like that.

I gave Nika a kiss before heading back up to the bridge. When I got there, Jones left to do some secret agent things and I had the wheelhouse to myse—

No, wait. Apple Bloom was still there. She’d been there all day, and hadn’t said a word. I couldn’t figure it out, and when I'd tried to ask she hadn't given me a satisfactory answer. See, this is why I’m not into mares.

The rest of the day passed slowly. All we were doing was trolling off the China coast hoping something interesting would happen. The few files of information the Equestrians had given us merely showed a location on shore where it appeared that an excavation was going on. What the Chinese were digging for was anyone’s guess, but someone in Canterlot wanted to know badly enough to send us out to take a look.

The clouds had stayed with us all day, but it never rained. It looked like it would be a dark, moonless night. As dusk began to settle, I went out to pull in a few fishing lines I’d set. There was no bait on them, but we had to make the yacht look like we had an excuse to be there.

Later that night, I had taken over in the CIC and Nika was on the bridge. Everyone else was probably sleeping before their time to man stations during the night.

I examined the radar display. It was not a standard maritime radar by a long shot. Some significant military research and development that had gone into it. My connections in the defense industry and the blessing of the government was the only reason I was able to get it installed on the boat.

One of the features tracked contacts for an extended time and looked for patterns. It was sometimes difficult to observe slow moving or indistinct targets, so the radar system was able to store information for playback later.

As I checked over the recording, a clear contact was visible. On normal radar returns, it would appear as a small spot that faded in and out even when the gain was high. Most people probably wouldn’t notice it and it was only by playing it at high speed that I was able to catch it.

The contact hung out at a distance that I guessed would be over the horizon from us. Much too far to see with the eyes. It paced back and forth, clearly keeping watch.

With a radar contact that small, it had to be a purpose-built stealth ship. It was an open secret that the Chinese had the technology, although getting information about the ships was very difficult. All we had were some grainy pictures taken by satellite.

Really, I wasn’t surprised. Our boat had probably spent too much time off the Chinese coast. We’d left a few calling cards. Too many, really. It was only natural that China would at least be suspicious of a boat matching our description, even if they didn’t truly know what we were up to.

I kept my eyes on the radar all night, handing it off in the morning. Our friend occasionally dodged out of the way to stay hidden from commercial shipping traffic, but never let us get out of sight. In the daylight with more surface activity, it was harder to pick up the faint contact.

When I got up after a nap, Nika told me that a pair of Chinese fighter jets had passed through the area. There had been others the day before. I wondered if there was a regular patrol in the region, or if it was something special just for us.

I didn’t think there was a leak that might be feeding the Chinese information. There could be, of course, but it was more likely that we had simply become too notorious. It didn’t help that the CIA and now Equestria wanted us in the area.

I was standing on the bridge with Nika late in the afternoon. I had brought up coffee and we were talking over the activity we’d noticed from the Chinese.

Apple Bloom was there again. I was sure she’d left at some point during the night, but hadn’t actually seen her clear the bridge.

I leaned against the bulkhead, making it easier to stand on two hooves while I held the coffee cup with the other two. Our conversation had just turned to the stealth ship when Apple Bloom hit the deck. “Torpedo!”

I grabbed Nika and pulled her down. I felt a little coffee splash on us as the cup smashed to the deck. She started to say something and was interrupted by an explosion from near the bow. It was so sudden and violent that we were lifted off the deck and thumped back down.

I scrambled up, a little stunned. The bridge windows were made of thick polycarbonate and had survivied. As I looked out, I realized with horror that the forward fifth of the boat was just flat missing. If it had been a warship with lots of compartments to seal, it might have been barely-survivable damage. As it was, the boat was definitely going down. The only question was how long it would take.

The lights were out. I grabbed a flashlight and quickly made my way below, avoiding broken glass and scattered equipment. Jones was on the deck of the CIC, bleeding slightly from the head. She appeared to be awake and moving, so I went on.

Andy slammed open the door to his cabin. He might have been asleep. “Abandon ship,” I told him. I looked into the compartment to make sure Hawker was okay.

On deck, I was relieved to see everyone and everypony there. An inflatable orange life raft had been pulled out and we would need it very soon. By the time I got in, the deck was nearly awash.

The boat was called Corsair, and I took a last look as the waves closed over her. It was strangely quiet. A few things floated on the surface of the water.

The seven of us were left in the raft. I took stock of our supplies. There was a satellite phone in its case strapped to my leg. Nika still had her AK. A small supply kit was attached to the floor of the raft.

“What happened?” asked Andy.

“We were torpedoed,” Apple Bloom said.

“Damn.”

“Who fired it?” asked Jones.

“China seems like a good candidate.” I was still a little disbelieving of the whole situation. Even if we were sailing a known spy boat, sinking it was just asking for an international incident if the United States wanted to push the issue.

I pulled out my phone. It still seemed to work so I dialed. There was a good chance any signals coming from the area where the boat had been sunk would be monitored, so I didn’t call the CIA. I called my lawyer.

“Hello, David Goldstein.”

“This is Sail. I’ve been shipwrecked.”

He paused, but then went on as if I’d said the weather was nice. “What would you like me to do?” That was why I liked David. He didn’t get excited.

“Notify the authorities. Try not to let anyone find out about it for as long as you can.”

“I’ll do that.” After a moment, he added, “Good luck.”

After a short discussion, we in the life raft decided that our best option was heading for the coast. It was perhaps twenty miles distant.

There was one collapsible paddle supplied with the raft. There wasn’t much food or water, and I hoped currents wouldn’t work against us and push us further out to sea.

We were rescued after only about a hour of being adrift. A small container ship appeared on the horizon and lumbered towards us. There was a parachute flare in the raft kit, and it seemed to draw the attention of the ship.

The crew was Chinese. A few spoke English. On their route, they were about a day from Dalian, China. We told them we were tourists. I wasn’t sure if they believed that or not, but they seemed nice enough to have stopped to bring us aboard.

I should have known things were going too well. There was a group of police waiting at the docks for us. We’d ditched all our weapons and incriminating material before boarding the container ship. The cops didn’t seem to be particularly aggressive and seemed more curious than hostile.

They took us downtown in a paddy wagon, although we weren’t cuffed. It seemed like we weren’t really under arrest, but they wouldn’t let us leave, either. I got the feeling that they had been unexpectedly told to come down to the docks and take custody of us. I hoped that didn’t mean we were being held until someone from the government or military came.

It was really kind of interesting to see how other countries’ law enforcement operated. Of course, I’d rather not do it from the back of a police vehicle. Still, China was inherently different than the United States and there was a lot to observe.

Talking quietly on the way to the police station, we reached the decision that it would be better to make an escape attempt sooner rather than later. When the vehicle stopped, they led us inside the police station. There seemed to be some confusion about what to do with us.

We were eventually led down a back hallway and deposited in a windowless office with two desks. One of the police officers that spoke English told us to stay.

The office door had a pane of frosted glass in it and the desks, currently unoccupied, looked like they were set up for paperwork. It wasn’t much to go on.

“Ideas?” I said, looking around.

“We’re in a low-traffic part of the building,” said Jones. “That’s a lower chance of being caught.”

“There was a metal door at the other end of the hallway that might be an exit,” said Scootaloo.

“I noticed that they didn’t lock this office door,” added Andy. “That probably means that it’s guarded.”

Nika said, “We need to find out how many guards and see if there is a way around them.”

“How about this?” asked Sweetie Belle, holding up a roll of clear tape she’d picked up from one of the desks. I was a little surprised to see it was real Scotch Tape, but then, it was made in China, wasn’t it?

The unicorn explained how the adhesive in the tape would fill in the roughness of the frosted glass and allow a somewhat effective way to see through it. She placed a strip on either side of the window and after a moment reported, “I think there’s a guy to the left.”

We quickly came up with a plan of action. As it happened, the guard Sweetie Belle had spotted was standing near the hinges of the outward-opening door. If it slammed open, it would pin him against the wall. All we could do was hope that there were not more police out there unseen.

Nika turned the doorknob slowly. It didn’t make any noise. She looked around and received a nod from everyone. We were ready.

As the door was thrown open, I heard a noise from the cop who had just been flattened. I glanced quickly to the other side of the door but saw no one, so I continued around the door and helped Nika subdue the officer behind it.

Between a couple of us, we gagged the slightly stunned guard and quickly carried him down the hallway and through the metal door. It turned out to be a light security inmate holding area, not the outdoors.

We grabbed the cop’s handcuffs and left him there chained to a metal bar with his hat stuffed in his mouth to keep him quiet. None of the prisoners seemed to speak English, but it sounded like they got a kick out of the guard’s detainment.

Down a couple of corridors we found a door that lead to a loading dock in an alley behind the police station. For some reason, the cops hadn’t taken my sat phone, so I was dialing as soon as we were outside.

The call went through and David picked up. I said, “We’re in Dalian, China, probably at the closest police station to the container ship docks. I need to get to the closest international airport.”

He was able to tell me the correct direction to head in. He said he’d start working on having tickets ready for when we arrived.

I got off the phone and the six of us started moving. The best bet would be to get a taxi, but we had no money. Maybe I could bribe the driver with the sat phone.

We flagged down a van that could fit us all with a driver that spoke English. I explained my deal to him.

“I don’t need that. Everyone has a telephone,” he said, showing off his own.

“Here,” said Andy, handing over his gold Rolex. The driver inspected it and nodded.

After a quick ride to the airport, we found the ticket booth. I was a little surprised at meeting more people than I expected that spoke English and I made a mental note to broaden my horizons a little.

David had come through and our tickets were waiting. We got lucky; they were for All Nippon Airways going to Tokyo and they left shortly. Airplanes had mostly gone by the wayside as portal technology had become more prevalent, but there was still a client base who prefered physical travel, or, like us, were under questionable circumstances.

Those in our group who wore clothes—Nika, Jones, Andy, and Hawker—had been wearing them since the boat sank. That was more than a day before and with significant ocean exposure. Some of the air crew gave us unkind looks coming aboard their nice clean plane, but we could care less.

The three Equestrians separated at Tokyo. Their plans had been arranged differently than ours. There was an issue with passports and trying to get passage back to the United States, so it was an easy decision to stay at a hotel for the night and let David sort things out. All of us needed the rest anyway.

That night in the hotel room I was feeling pretty relaxed. Not having your life in imminent danger is nice. Also, Nika was preening my feathers. If you don’t have feathers or friends with fingers you don’t understand. It’s amazing.

“I was thinking about something,” she said. “What sort of torpedo was that?”

I frowned. “Well, I didn’t think there was anything around us besides a submarine that could launch a torpedo. That limits the options.”

“553-millimeter submarine torpedoes are very powerful, aren’t they?” she asked.

“Yeah, and against our little boat we should have been blown to pieces.” I frowned. “Not that I mind being alive, but something strange is going on here.”

Chapter 2

After a day or two of paperwork to cover our lost passports, we arrived back in Norfolk, Virginia. Andy and I had been born and raised in the area.

We headed for the shipyard. It was a very good thing that the boat sinking happened so close to the time when our new ship was almost ready. We could practically move in right away.

The replacement vessel had come to us in a rather convoluted manner. The company that had commissioned it to be built at our shipyard declared bankruptcy and canceled the order. The ship was very nearly completed when this happened, though, so the Chinese bank that had financed the construction tried to sell it and recoup its losses.

This proved nearly impossible, however, because while the vessel had been built with bulk cargo in mind, it was of a rather impractical design and nobody wanted it. One company did finally step in and take it off the bank’s hands, albeit at a significantly reduced price.

If anyone found out that I owned both companies and had used the ploy to get a significantly reduced price at the expense of a foreign bank, I would be up on charges of fraud. Perhaps even worse than that if the Chinese figured it out. Luckily, David was excellent at what he did.

Another part of the tactic was to muddy the waters of ownership. I could be traced as being involved with the ship, but it would be much more difficult now.

Building a ship is no cheap thing, and even while the bank footed a significant portion of the bill, it was still hefty. The CIA had paid a chunk, as had the Navy. Ultimately, I ended up paying a lot of the cost myself. The old boat getting sunk had pushed my finances a little harder than I was comfortable.

The ship was being held in a covered dry dock at the shipyard. This allowed us to work on it in all weather, but also to keep prying eyes out. What was going on inside was not for the public to see.

The ship was supported over the floor of the dry dock. Strong steel doors kept the water out until we were ready. Most of the heavy work was out of the way, and workers were scattered around putting the finishing touches on things.

Andy had been involved with making sure all the electronics aboard played nice with each other. He knew his computers.

Hawker had been helpful to him, but had mostly been working on getting the cabins outfitted. She was no interior designer, but was the most qualified. I’d noticed how often tasks in our group fell to whoever knew just a little more about something than everyone else.

We started making a list of things that we would need to replace because they were lost on the other boat. Since I’d sold my house and begun spending my time almost exclusively at sea, it was almost everything that I’d owned.

We got settled in on the ship. It was noisy from the work going on round the clock, but earplugs helped.

There were two visitors the next morning. They Admiral Benjamin Nevis, USN and Carl Hanley, CIA. The two of them had played a large part in creating my current employment.

Both of them were as unlikeable as snakes, but the three of us had established a working relationship. I did things for them, and they gave me money and equipment.

We sat down in the still unfinished galley and discussed the sinking in detail. There was no evidence as to who was behind the attack, but the obvious choice was still China.

“You’re damn lucky that everyone is alive,” said Nevis. “I’ve seen weapons tests of torpedoes crack a destroyer in half. Your little boat could have been vaporized.”

He was exaggerating, but not by much. “Luck shot, I guess.”

Hanley looked annoyed. “We really needed you out there. We were just about to reassign you to cover Korea.”

“What’s going on?” I had briefly seen something about it on the news at the airport, but hadn’t followed up.

“We’re told that a small group of North Korean soldiers were caught sneaking into South Korea and there was a shootout.”

“That happens once every few years, doesn’t it?”

“Well, yes.”

“Not anything unexpected from them.”

“Well, there did seem to be something a little strange about it.”

“So what does that mean?” I asked.

“It means we really need someone there to collect intelligence,” said Hanley sounding a little indignant that I had the nerve to get shipwrecked and ruin his operation.

“This thing will be ready to sail in two weeks,” I said, gesturing to the bulkheads around us.

Hanley nodded. “I can live with that.” He got up to leave.

“Go on,” said Nevis. “I want to take a look around.” When Hanley had left, I walked with Nevis around the ship. It gave us time to talk alone, which had been his plan.

“Is there anything you need?” he asked. His position as head of the Navy Procurement Committee let him move things around in the Navy’s inventory.

“Ordinance. Maybe some small arms,” I told him.

“Speaking of small arms, I heard that shipment of HK416s was lost on the way to Texas.” He gave me a knowing look.

The Navy had supplied us with a few assault rifles, supposedly for Canvas Shipbuilding to conduct hot weather testing. In reality, I faked their disappearance and was carrying them on the boat at the time of the sinking. On David’s advice, I had actually purchased a piece of land in west Texas, so anyone who went looking for a listing of our test facility would see that we did indeed own property in that area.

Changing the subject, Nevis said, “What all do you have aboard this thing, anyway?”

I smiled to myself. The ship may have looked like it was built for cargo, but it would never turn a profit by carrying goods. The truth was, there was more weaponry than the entirety of some third-world navies. I said, “I’ll get you a list.”

The shipyard did a lot of business with the Navy, and we had the guns and missile launchers available in the warehouse, but the Navy had a little tighter control on the shells and missiles to arm them. Getting my hooves on stuff like that required going through Nevis, who was perfectly willing to bend the rules if it would benefit him somehow.

Since I was in Norfolk, I decided to go see my therapist face-to-face. I had a standing appointment with her once a week for the past couple of years, but since moving to my new line of work we usually had to have a phone conference.

Dr. Mind Games’ office was nicely furnished despite being in a strip mall. She even had the stereotypical couch. The sand-colored unicorn was elderly and spectacled with a brain for a cutie mark.

Depending on the situation, I had sometimes been unable to communicate at the regular time, so we had decided that it was better for me to call her. I found her sitting next to the phone.

“Sail, this is a surprise.”

“It sure is. Let me tell you all about it.”

An hour later, I finished my summary of the past week. I thought I had almost caught Dr. Games rolling her eyes at the unbelievability of it, but she was a professional and didn’t let it show. I had to admit, on the scale of things I’d told her in the past, it was probably up there. Honestly, I’d never told her a lie, although whether she believed that or not I didn’t know.

Since I rarely asked for any direct help and was content telling her how my life was going, she never attempted to do much more than listen and discuss my feelings. If she thought it was easy money, fine. I liked having a neutral observer to talk to that helped me organize my own thoughts.

“Do you believe you could have done things differently, such as taking the presence of the stealth ship as a warning?”

I didn’t tell Dr. Games any state secrets that were too big, particularly when we talked over the phone, but I thought a few little details helped.

“Maybe I could have, but who expects to be torpedoed during peacetime?”

“The important thing is that you all are safe. How do you feel about it now that you’re back on land and have had time to reflect?”

I thought for a moment. “Honestly, I feel like getting even. If I could prove that the Chinese sank me on purpose, I might think about starting something.”

“Remember, you have the interests of others to think about.”

“Right, but they’re paid to work for me, so what does it matter?”

“Sail, we’re talking about decency here, not capitalism.”

“I guess you’re right. I should increase wages.”

This time, she actually did roll her eyes.

Back at the shipyard, work was progressing a little faster than planned. The novelty of a new ship hadn’t worn off yet. I’d pretty much designed it myself. Some compromises had been made in terms of budget and capability, but it was likely the finest private fighting ship in the world.

It was an even 470 feet long and 50 feet wide. This was a little narrower length/width ratio than many cargo ships. The superstructure was located a little aft of midships, with one cargo hold aft of it and three ahead. The bow and stern were somewhat more pointed than usual, which decreased the drag of going through the water but reduced the space for carrying cargo. There was an A-frame crane on the stern that could lean fore or aft to service the stern cargo hold or swing out over the stern of the ship. Ahead of the superstructure, another crane was mounted on rails so it could move and take care of all three forward holds. They were numbered one through four, fore to aft.

All in all, it looked like a regular cargo ship that had a grandparent that was a research vessel and another that was a speedboat. That’s why nobody but me wanted to buy it—it wouldn’t have been great for actually carrying cargo. I had had a fake company website with the name Roberts Corp. set up to extol all the drawbacks as actual virtues, so anyone who thought the ship looked strange would just chalk it up to an eccentric business model.

While not published to the false company website, the propulsion system was also unusual. It was powered by four turbine generators positioned around the ship which sent electrical power anywhere it was needed. The main use was for two azimuth thrusters mounted beneath the stern. They used propellers to move the ship, and they could swivel in a 360 degree circle to direct thrust however it was needed. It increased the ship’s agility and acceleration by a lot.

All strangeness aside, what really counted was hidden. The holds all had domed covers, and concealed within the number one and number four holds were weapons that would shame a frigate.

Each hold contained one 5”/54 naval gun. Number four also had a Rolling Airframe Missile launcher and a set of Harpoon missile launchers, while number one used a Mk 29 box launcher. All the weapons were mounted on platforms at the top of the hold to position them at the level of the deck, leaving the bottom of the hold occupied with the guns’ magazines and whatever we could fit.

The original plans had called for a vertical launch system to carry a couple dozen long range missiles. That was just a little more than Nevis and Hanley were willing to commit to, and I had practically gotten in a shouting match with them over it. Ultimately, they paid the bills so they got to say no.

Work on the ship progressed steadily, and we put the final coat of paint on three days ahead of schedule. The boat had a dark blue hull with white upper structures. The Roberts Corp. logo was painted on either side of the superstructure.

All of us had debated the name for quite a while. A pirate theme seemed favorable, but it didn’t fit with the cargo ship disguise. We eventually resorted to combing lists of ship registries for something likeable but nicely inconspicuous. The vote was eventually cast and we settled on one.

In the short time since I’d started my little private military company, it had already developed far past my expectations. The name of the ship may have meant something different to the rest of the crew, but to me it spoke of how far we’d come and how far we might go.

We called the ship Traveler.

There were no problems flooding the drydock and proceeding with launching ceremony. It’s always interesting getting to know a new ship. At some point, you begin to understand its personality and stop thinking of it as “it” and switch to “she.” Nika used the masculine pronoun, though. Russians are funny that way.

We had some time for testing Traveler’s capabilities. With the azimuth main propulsion and a bow thruster, it maneuvered like a much smaller vessel. We could shut down one or even a couple of the four turbine engines to save fuel, but if all of them were online, they could put out a tremendous amount of horsepower. Combined with a light load to decrease the drag of the water, the ship could make nearly 35 knots, unheard of for a cargo ship of that size. The streamlined bow and stern helped, but we could never go that fast if the ship had a deeper draft.

If speed wasn’t a concern, we could let water into a row of ballast tanks inside the hull to add weight. It simulated a load of cargo, and it made handling the ship in heavy seas easier. Not only that, it made us a smaller target by sitting lower in the water.

A definite advantage of the larger ship was bigger fuel tanks for increased range. Not that we were burning much by running back and forth off the coast, but it was nice to know.

I didn’t particularly crave combat, but I was interested to see how well the ship would fare. We’d selected the 5”/54 guns based on their availability and atributes. There was a newer model with a longer barrel, but the older ones were easier to get and not as difficult to conceal. Still, they were deadly enough. Each gun had a maximum effective range of a little over eight nautical miles, and the five inch-diameter shell would make an impression on anything it hit. The two guns could each fire twenty times per minute.

The box launcher on the foredeck was loaded with Evolved Sea Sparrow Missiles that could reach almost thirty miles at Mach 4. It was designed to defend the ship. The launcher carried eight of them.

The Rolling Airframe Missile, so called because it spiraled like a football, was fired from a 21-cell launcher located aft. It was intended as a short range last resort defensive weapon against incoming missiles. In a pinch, it could also engage aircraft and small boats.

Tucked in with the RAM and the aft gun were two sets of four-tube launchers for the Harpoon missiles. They hunted ships, and could travel more than seventy miles.

Of course, I hadn’t gotten everything I wanted. It would have been nice to simply lift the entire Aegis system from a Ticonderoga-class cruiser, but I didn’t have that much money or political influence. Actually, money and political influence were the same thing.

We had been out a couple of days and hadn’t yet discovered any significant problems. None on our ship, anyway. One night the maritime radio began reporting a surprise tsunami striking the east coast of Japan. This was quickly retracted and changed to an “unexpected disaster.”

I asked Andy to check news websites to see what was going on. There seemed to be a general sense of confusion among the media. Something had happened, but nobody was quite sure what.

Only a few minutes had passed when reports began coming in about something else, this time in Hawaii. That did it. I decided to call Nevis.

“What’s going on?” I asked when he picked up his cell phone.

He didn’t have to ask what I meant. “I haven’t been told anything official, but it’s big.” His tone of voice changed. “I know someone out in Nebraska at Offutt who told me that a Constant Phoenix bird just took off.”

It took me a moment to realize what he meant. The WC-135 Constant Phoenix airplanes were based at Offutt Air Force Base in Nebraska. Those aircraft had a very specific purpose.

“Yeah, that’s bad,” I said.

“If I was a betting man, I’d say your phone is about to start ringing off the hook."

I got off the phone with Nevis and punched the button for the ship-wide intercom. “If any of you haven’t heard yet, something big just happened in the Pacific. Nobody has officially said what happened yet, but an Air Force plane specialized in atmosphere testing after nuclear incidents was just mobilized. Get a good night’s sleep, because tomorrow is probably going to be a bitch.”

A few minutes passed, and we recieved an encrypted call. It was not a protocol I had used before. The Navy had their own method of secure communication, and so did the CIA.

We got the signal unscrambled and I answered. The voice on the other end was female. “Mr. Canvas, I would like to inquire about your services. There’s just been an event we’d like you to look into. It happened in Earth’s Pacific Ocean.”

“Yeah, I heard,” I said. “Although I don’t really think I want go poking around with anything nuclear. Also, I know which planet the Pacific is on. I might be a pony, but I was born here, thank you very much.”

“Well, that explains why you don’t recognize my voice,” she said. “This is Princess Celestia.”

Chapter 3

Celestia wanted us to go to Canada.

“What?” I said. “What does this have to do with a nuclear event in the Pacific?”

“It wasn’t nuclear,” she said. “Will you take the job or not?”

Her reassurance calmed me only a little. Okay, so it wasn’t a nuke. Then what the hell was it?

“Fine,” I said. “What do I need to know?”

“I understand that you’re in the defense business, Mr. Canvas. Do you know anything about something called the DEW Line?”

It took me a moment to remember. “The Distant Early Warning radar station network? I don’t really know much about it. It was built in the arctic for defense against Soviet bombers. That was way before my time.”

“You’ll have a while to learn about it,” she said. “I’d like you to head for a place call Durban Island. It’s located in Nunavut. I’ll get a copy of your contract sent to you.”

So she wanted to play the “I’ll tell you when you get there,” game. The CIA did that to me all the time. I commented, “We usually do contracts electronically.”

“Call me old fashioned,” said Celestia. “Where are you currently located?”

I looked around. I was alone on the bridge, and saw nothing outside but water. “I’m on a boat off the U.S. east coast.”

“I’ll find you.” The call cut off.

I shrugged. While I was more than a little surprised to get a call from Celestia, it probably didn’t mean as much to me as it might have to an Equestrian pony. There were a lot of people—and me, too—who were a little skeptical about the whole deity-ruler thing she had going on. I’d never thought about it too much.

That is, until a scroll of paper with a fancy seal popped into existence right in front of my face. I jumped backwards in surprise. Nothing happened for several seconds. I looked around and picked it up off the deck.

It was a contract. The language was vague, and all it really promised was that money would go in my bank account if I did what Celestia wanted.

I took it down to the CIC where Andy was on duty. He watched me jam the paper in the scanner and make a copy. Take that, magic.

“What’s that?” he asked.

I explained to him the conversation with Celestia and her unusual method of postal delivery. Andy nodded. “Probably saves on stamps.”

“She could have e-mailed it,” I grumbled. Grabbing a pen with my mouth, I signed the contract. As I rolled it up again, it suddenly disappeared in a flash of light.

Andy made a noise of surprise. I would have been startled if I hadn’t seen it arrive.

“So what are we doing?” he asked.

“Pull up everything you can find on the DEW Line and a place called Durban Island.”

Andy nodded and turned to his computer, tapping on the keys. After a moment he said, “We’re going to the Arctic Ocean?”

I sighed. “Get your Blues Brothers sunglasses. We’re on a mission from a goddess.”

Before heading north, we had to get everything squared away. Shep, our helicopter pilot, and Jeff, our chief mechanic, came aboard.

Below decks, Jeff had his four turbine engines to take care of although they were so new and smooth-running they probably didn’t need supervision. They were spread out and staggered side to side in the ship, so hopefully no single attack could disable more than one of them. The ship’s electrical system could automatically switch power between the generators and whatever needed electricity.

Shep’s helicopter was an old Huey that had been owned personally by him before he was hired to the company. While the first and fourth cargo holds concealed the ship’s weapons, the second one was a helicopter pad. The helo could be kept concealed and out of the weather beneath the domed hold cover. It was mostly for utility airlift work, but we’d gotten our hands on a pair of M240 machine guns that could be mounted to it. Since we had no reason for Shep to fly at the moment, he filled in as a regular crew member.

I had managed to obtain a couple dozen rounds for the ship’s guns. Nevis was working slowly and wasn’t able to provide lots of help. Well, it’s not like we should need many missiles. I mean, we were going to Canada. Compared to some places I had been, it sounded like a vacation.

Andy had dug up information. The DEW Line had been a joint U.S.-Canada effort to provide early warning about stuff in the far north. It had been built in the 1950s. Some of the sites had been replaced in the 1990s. The rest had been left to the elements.

We were going to a station that hadn’t been active since 1963. It was known as FOX-E. Hawker wondered if “foxy” meant the same thing back then. Jones asked if we were carrying the right equipment, since the summer temperature up there was only about sixty degrees. Nika didn’t seem impressed by the threat of cold.

Jeff asked if we had any more information. I shook my head. “Equestria can be as cagey as the CIA or any other three-letter agency.”

“Same old story,” said Shep. “The fungus treatment.” He and Jeff chorused, “Kept in the dark and fed a steady diet of shit!”

I shook my head. They were both former Navy and knew the same jokes. I said, “Regardless, we’ve got to stay sharp. This place, Durban Island, is a long way from anywhere. If something happens, help won’t be easy to get.”

We talked for a little longer and then the group broke up. It had been a nice little crew meeting. I felt that it was best to have them on occasion. As cheesy as it sounded, cohesiveness was important.

We set out for a long trip. Using Earth’s degree coordinate system, the equator was 0 and the North Pole was 90. Norfolk was about a third of the way up the globe at 37 degrees north. FOX-E was at 66. To put it another way, we ended up past the southern tip of Greenland, and entirely north of Iceland.

We arrived at the site to find tall cliffs and evidence of glaciers in the distance. The ship could edge up close to the shore, but it would be easier to just lift everything we needed to the site with the helicopter.

We had no sooner arrived on station than a message from Celestia appeared. Jones was on bridge watch when it came, and I wish I could have seen her reaction because that would have meant that I was there and not in bed with Nika when Jones opened the door.

Her mouth dropped open in surprise. I untangled myself from Nika’s hair and sat up. “I really hope whatever you have to say is important. The water’s kind of cold to have you walking the plank.”

Nika was not naked, not this time. She sat up too, and we glared at Jones.

The CIA agent fumbled for a moment and then held up a scroll. “This just arrived. It’s orders.”

I gestured with a hoof. “Read them.”

“We’re supposed to establish a base of operations and wait for further instructions.”

I grumbled and got out of bed. “All right, I’ll go have a look. Go tell Shep to prepare the helicopter and get things ready.”

After finding a camera, I put the strap around my neck and went outside. Despite the sun it was chilly, and the wind didn’t help. I felt like I should probably have a scarf, but decided not to go back and get one. After stretching my wings I took off.

I remembered Andy telling me that the island was only about fourteen square miles. The radar station was located near the center, at the highest point. There were a few small boxy buildings and one tall tower. It certainly looked like it had been abandoned for more than half a century. I snapped a few pictures and circled lower for a better view. There was no guarantee the place was actually deserted, and I was careful.

There were a few patches of blown snow in places. I touched down on a relatively clear piece of ground. The main building looked like it had been constructed of prefabricated panels. It was rectangular, and about the size of a couple of semi trailers parked side by side. The windows were dark. I tried a side door and found it unlocked. Poking my head in, I noted that the interior was not in great shape, although at least inside would be out of the wind.

Closing the door, I went to check the other building. Halfway across the compound, I stopped suddenly. There was a small depression in a patch of snow. It had been mostly smoothed over by the wind, but I could tell that it was a hoof print. There was no way to tell how long ago it might have been made, but I was definitely not the first pony to have visited.

Back at the ship, I made a report on the condition of the place. I had managed to locate the old helicopter pad that had been used for transport back when the site was active. Shep, Jeff, Nika, and I piled into the helo with plenty of gear. Celestia had neglected to tell us how long we would be staying.

On the island, we got the Huey secured, and then began setting up camp. The old building was full of animal nests and dust, but it would work. We had cots, arctic-rated sleeping bags, a stove and heater that ran on propane, and plenty of food and water. It was almost like camping.

Andy called from the ship as we were almost finished setting up. “We have an air contact on radar coming in. I’m guessing it’s a helicopter.”

It was not a good situation. If our visitors were hostile, we were probably screwed. The four of us had personal weapons, but nothing too serious.

We watched from the window as a grey helicopter appeared. I recognized it as a CH-148 Cyclone, noting the Royal Canadian Air Force markings. It circled the area and passed over the ship before coming in to hover at a reasonably flat place since our helicopter took up the designated landing area.

After the helo touched down, the door slid open and armed men wearing camouflage began climbing out. They seemed more confused than anything, and weren’t rushing to storm the building. After a quick discussion, we decided to go out and politely meet them.

They didn’t point their weapons in our direction. One of the men separated from the group and met us. He raised his voice over the shutting-down helicopter. “Who are you?”

“My name’s Sail Canvas.” I glanced at his nametag and uniform insignia. “And I’m guessing you’re Major Hiller, of the Canadian Army.”

He nodded. “Correct. What, may I ask, is your business in Canada?”

I shrugged. “I wish I knew. Princess Celestia asked me to come and await further instructions.”

“I somehow doubt you have authorization to be here. This is government property.” Hiller glanced at Nika, Jeff, and Shep. “Who are they?”

“They’re part of my crew. We belong to that ship sitting out there.” I nodded in the direction of Traveler, which was plainly visible off the coast.

“I noticed that you’re flying a U.S. flag,” he said.

I nodded. “Yeah, it’s where I’m from.”

Hiller’s eyebrows went up. I sighed. “Yeah, I get mistaken for an Equestrian a lot. Just one of those things.”

“So how does an American pony, under direction of Princess Celestia of Equestria, end up at an abandoned radar station in the middle of nowhere?”

“Like I said, I wish I knew. Now, what are you doing here? Meeting here of all places can’t be random chance, and some of that gear your guys are packing looks like the best-of-the-best. Why were you expecting trouble? Who are you, anyway? JTF2?”

Joint Task Force 2 was an elite special operations group usually tasked with counter-terrorism. On a scale of one to funny, Canadian special forces scored pretty high, although from what I’d heard that reputation was undeserved. They were not really who I wanted to have angry at me, but sometimes I just couldn’t resist. After all, the Major had asked me some things. I might as well ask a few of my own.

Hiller did not answer any of my questions. Instead, he pulled out a sat phone and spent a few minutes talking with someone while his guys kept a careful eye on us. I was surprised when he came back and presented me with a document he’d taken from his pocket. I asked, “What’s this?”

“Mr. Canvas, I just got off the phone with someone very important in Ottawa. As I understand it, you’re cleared for this.”

I looked at the paper he had given me.

(TS//FVEY)

DNI

(TS) Decommissioned DEW radar station Durban Island: Possible cross-dimensional activity anticipated. Embedded sources unable to determine further details.

TS stood for Top Secret. FVEY was “Five eyes,” a name for Canada, the UK, the USA, Australia, and New Zealand. Those were the only countries authorized to see the message. And DNI, that was the source of the communication. It was the Director of National Intelligence, an advisor to the President.

What I was able to gather from the brief paragraph was that someone was worried about crossing to the other dimension here of all places. Also, it was so important that the top leadership in the United States was involved. Furthermore, Equestria had not been included in the sharing of this intel.

It all added up to more questions than I had started with.

Chapter 4

“None of this makes any sense,” I said. Major Hiller, of the Canadian Armed Forces, Joint Task Force 2, seemed to agree. His group and mine had both arrived at the radar station at the same time, on unclear orders of two different authorities.

Still, all of us were anticipating something to happen here, so we decided to wait. The Canadians had brought basic survival equipment, but Shep and Jeff took our helo back to Traveler, returning with hot food and a couple of decks of cards. Since we had lots of friends with guns now, I told the fliers to take it easy and spend the night aboard the ship.

A couple of hours passed. We’d all moved inside the abandoned building, and it had begun to warm up from the body heat of the soldiers, Nika, and I. A couple of troops had been left outside to stand watch.

There wasn’t much conversation. They were unwilling to talk about their secrets, and we felt the same way. Good thing we had poker. The plastic chips even made it so we didn’t need compatible money.

We were in the middle of a hand when the door was wrenched open. One of the soldiers on duty came in. “A doorway just opened.”

I was the first one out of the building. Sure enough, there was a portal standing there without a frame. That meant it was being powered from the other side. As I walked over to it, Apple Bloom, Scootaloo, and Sweetie Belle came through. All three were injured in some way.

“What happened?” I asked.

Instead of answering my question, Sweetie Belle said, “This is a portable doorway. It’s got about twenty seconds left before the generator self-destructs. You need to get those saddlebags.”

I followed her pointing hoof towards a pair of crumpled green bags lying a few dozen yards past the open doorway. There were a lot of questions I wanted to ask. How had they been hurt? Was whatever caused their injuries waiting for me on the other side? Where was the doorway connecting to? However, her warning about the time left got me to move without even a snide comment.

I put my head through the doorway and glanced around. There was a grassy plain with mountains in the distance. I heard the sound of jet engines and glanced up. There were a pair of Su-27 Flanker fighter jets orbiting the area. They were distinctive and easy to recognize because of a protruding bit of fuselage between the engines.

I remembered that it was unique feature to the Flanker jet because of a little mnemonic phrase I had memorized: “Flanker has a wanker.” Nika’s version of it in Russian was not as dirty, but less funny.

Speaking of her, I felt a gentle touch on my withers that let me know she was there. I heard the sling swivels rattle as she pulled her AK-47 off her shoulder. She dropped the bolt and chambered a round. Clack.

There were now perhaps fifteen seconds left. I dashed through the portal and made for the saddlebags. There was a staccato hammering sound behind me and Nika shouted in surprise.

I whirled around, seeing dust hanging in the air as one of the jets roared low overhead, nearly blowing my ears out. The pilot had shot at us! I stared up at the plane, seeing roundels on the wings from…the Griffon Kingdom? It took me a moment to remember that the Russians had sold them some jets.

Nika was on the ground beside the doorway. A small metal box with fancy electronics attached to it was powering the portal. The device had clearly been designed for one-time use only, as a built in digital counter was ticking numbers off. 10…9…

I grabbed Nika out of the grass and hauled her back through the doorway. She was covered with kicked-up dirt, but unharmed. Maybe I’d overreacted, but when a fighter jet armed with a thirty millimeter cannon fires in your general direction, you don’t hang around.

I looked back. I hadn’t grabbed the saddlebags the first time, but I thought I was quick enough to make one more trip. As I went back through the doorway, the second jet came around and fired a burst into the ground in front of me. I pulled up short and nearly fell, almost replicating Nika’s reaction.

I hesitated, looking at my objective, but I was out of time. I turned and headed for the doorway as fast as I could fly. Over my shoulder, I heard a bang as the generator blew up. The portal slammed shut, whacking off the last few inches of my tail.

I skidded to a halt, my heart beating like crazy. Nika was safe, and the three mares from Equestria weren’t in terrible condition. Could have been worse.

“You didn’t get it!” shouted Apple Bloom, who was bleeding from the head.

“Well excuse me for putting my girlfriend over your interests,” I said.

“You have no idea how important that was!” growled Scootaloo, who had half the feathers on one wing singed off.

“It wasn’t my job,” I pointed out. “Until you three showed up, I didn’t even know what I was doing here.”

Sweetie Belle glared at me, ignoring the numerous small cuts on her body. Her horn began to glow menacingly.

Nika put the barrel of her rifle against the back of the unicorn’s head. “Be careful.”

The white mare dropped her magic. I had no idea what she was planning to do with it, but was thankful to have someone on my side. The Canadians had merely been standing by and observing quietly.

Apple Bloom turned, noticing them for the first time. “Who are they?”

“I could ask you the same question,” said Major Hiller.

“Classified information,” Scootaloo said.

Hiller’s expression didn’t change. “Same.”

“Well,” I said, “Unless you’ve got another portable portal, I guess you three will be needing a ride. Too bad I’m not going to give you one.”

“What do you mean?” demanded Apple Bloom.

“Princess Celestia told me to come here. She didn’t say anything about meeting up with you, or participating in whatever you were doing.”

“Your contract said that you agreed to take orders from Princess Celestia, or anypony with authorization,” said Sweetie Belle. “We’re ordering you to take us to the nearest doorway entry point back to Equestria. I would say it’s the least you could do after failing to carry out the order to retrieve those saddlebags.”

I chuckled a little. Granted, I had no idea what was in those bags, or how important it might be, but I was being given orders by a white unicorn with a pink and purple mane. Even if you’re a pony yourself, living on Earth your whole life alters your sense of humor.

“You know, our nice Canadian friends could probably get you back to civilization quicker,” I pointed out.

“I’m not getting involved with any of this business,” said Hiller. He turned and boarded the helicopter with all his men. After a few minutes to spin up the blades, they departed.

Meanwhile, Nika and I had called for our own helo and waited in hostile silence with the three Equestrians. Shep and Jeff picked up the five of us. The trio of mares perked up as we approached the ship. Fillies love ships. Actually, they were probably trying to spot hidden equipment. Considering what they knew about my previous boat—which was too much—that was to be expected. The old boat may have been gone, but I still regretted letting them wander around so freely.

Back aboard, I went to the CIC. Opening the door, I said, “Get me Canterlot.”

Andy blinked. “Um, okay.”

And about ten minutes later, he made it happen. It’s not easy to just cold-call royalty of a country in a different dimension, but Andy was a pro.

“Mr. Canvas, how are things?”

“Not so bad. Your three secret agents might disagree.”

“Are they all right?” Her voice was calm, but carried so much no time for jokes undertone that I nearly snapped to attention like a soldier.

“No serious injuries,” I reported. “They told me to get a pair of saddlebags from the other side of the doorway they arrived through, but I was attacked by Griffon fighter jets and didn’t manage to get the bags before the timer on the generator ran out.”

I hoped my explanation didn’t confuse her. I had no idea what Celestia might already know about the mission of the three mares. It seemed hard to believe that she could run a country and yet be intimately involved with special operations, but there was a lot that I found hard to believe about Celestia.

There was a moment of silence. Celestia said, “When you get to a doorway, I’d like you to come have a meeting with me face to face.”

“This is a secure line,” I said.

“That isn’t the point.”

I figured that once you get a few years on you, you get set in old-fashioned ways. If the stories were true, Celestia had a lot of years. I replied, “All right. I’ll come to Equestria.”

Andy had picked up most of the conversation. After I put the receiver down, I told him what I knew. Apple Bloom, Scootaloo, and Sweetie Belle were trying to bring something out of the other dimension. Was it equipment? Documents? Whatever it was, it fit in a pair of saddlebags.

I finished my monologue with more speculation. “The Su-27 is an air superiority fighter. The only reason I can think of that they were trying to attack us on the ground—and with guns—is because nothing else was available at the time.”

“So would you say those mares were in Griffon territory?” asked Andy.

“Well, that would make sense. I mean, it’s possible that they could have flown to somewhere else, but that seems less likely.”

“Maybe that’s why they didn’t have ground-attack planes,” observed Andy. “They were reacting quickly to intruders and that was all that could respond in time.”

I nodded. “Makes sense. It still doesn’t explain why the Canadians showed up. I know that intelligence was sent to them by the United States, but I thought we were all allies with Equestria. Why didn’t Celestia tell anyone beforehand?”

“And why did we have to come all the way up here,” added Andy. “Dimensional doorways can appear anywhere they’re built to go.”

While I wasn’t in the portal business, I knew that the way they were made dictated where they would open to, and it wasn’t easy or cheap to change that. Maybe the one-time portable doorway was used for emergency escape, if things were so bad that anywhere was preferable to where you were.

At any rate, we weren’t going to be getting answers out of our guests. They asked for a secure video conference with Celestia, and we gave it to them. A couple hours later, they came out of the room and went back to not answering our questions.

We cruised down the Canadian coast until reaching Halifax, where there was a doorway facility. It didn’t have direct access to Canterlot, but I was fine with that. I hadn’t been to Equestria very often, and Celestia hadn’t said exactly when she wanted to meet with me. Nika and I went through the doorway and left the rest of the crew to sail back to Norfolk.

It was late in Ponyville when we came out of the doorway building. I had heard them sometimes called Doorports, but that reminded me too much of an airport. Still, since long distance travel had been primarily taken over by doorways, I guess we needed to –port something.

With all the tourists, Ponyville had grown a lot in just a couple of decades. Nika and I booked a hotel room and decided to see what could be found for dinner. I didn’t eat hay and other Equestrian food very often, mainly due to lack of availability on Earth. I didn’t have problems getting the roughage my gut needed, but if I was really going heavy on the human food I could just take some fiber pills or something.

Nika had dressed for the occasion. She wasn’t such a pirate that she couldn’t clean up very nicely once in a while. She wore a grey dress that was cut to make even the drab color look interesting. One of my pale green feathers was braided into her hair for color.

I knew how people reacted to our relationship, but it might be interesting to see the pony view on it. The feather was a bit much, but it’s not like I had a hand for her to hold to make it really obvious.

Pony restaurants were generally human-compatible as long as said person was willing to eat just a salad. As we were being seated, a server went by carrying something that appeared to be sautéed alfalfa with a side of daisies. It smelled good. All the food reminded me that I hadn’t had animal crackers in days, however.

Our waitress came over. My order of sweet iced tea seemed to confuse her a little. Ponies, like the British, typically took their tea hot, but the mare said she would see what could be done. She hung around for a bit. “I haven’t seen either of you around before. I take it you’re just visiting?”

“That’s correct,” acknowledged Nika.

“Do you mind if I ask where you’re from?” said the waitress. “I’m taking linguist classes at the university, but I’m not good with human accents.”

“Russia.”

The mare turned to me. “And what about you? Somewhere over towards Trottingham, maybe?”

“No, I have a human accent, too. I’m from Virginia.”

The sweet tea was nothing compared to how much that confused her.

Chapter 5

After staying the night in Ponyville, Nika and I went back to the doorway facility and got a transfer to Canterlot. I didn’t know how we would get in to see Celestia, and did not really care. Those who were important seemed to be able to find me when they wanted me for something. I figured that if we showed up at the castle, that would be good enough.

As we departed the doorway hub, Nika subtly bumped my side with her hip. I turned on the street corner and we walked a different direction. I didn’t know what might cause her concern, but if she wanted to check for a tail, I was fine with that.

We didn’t see anything, or at least not at first. Being a pegasus myself, I should have thought to look up sooner. I studied the patterns of flight overhead. There seemed to be a steady cycle of traffic. I picked out one or two ponies that looked suspicious, but not enough to really make me worried.

We returned to our original course without spotting a tail. There were a couple, though. The Equestrians couldn’t be expected to play by the rules, of course, and it turned out they were using magic for disguises. Nika and I suddenly learned that when a pair of unicorns stepped in front of us and decloaked, revealing their true appearance.

I swore and rolled my eyes. “You know, you could have just met us at the terminal.”

“We wanted to make sure you were alone,” said one of them.

“You don’t trust me?”

“You’re mercenaries,” he said, looking at Nika too.

“Private contractor,” I muttered, although not very insistently. He seemed like the kind of guy who wouldn’t change what he called me just because I objected to it.

“Come along, the Princess wants to meet with you.”

Despite my consternation, at least we were getting somewhere. Nika and I followed along. I tried to find out a little more so I would be prepared. It’s never a good idea to be caught unaware when meeting with a head of state.

“What’s this all about?” I asked.

“Princess Celestia is not pleased with you,” said one of the stallions. “Apparently, you broke some sort of contract.”

Was that how she saw it? The three mares had told me to retrieve the bag from the other side of the doorway and I had failed. I retorted, “It’s not like I didn’t try. There were fighter jets shooting at me.”

“The way I understand it, you put your woman over the mission.” The both threw Nika a look that wasn’t quite hostile but certainly not polite. I gritted my teeth and managed to say nothing. It wasn’t easy.

We went up to the palace on the mountain. It was an Equestrian landmark, but I had never been so close before. The two unicorns handed us off to a Royal Guard who escorted Nika and I the rest of the way to Celestia’s office.

“Sorry, but only you can go in, Mr. Canvas,” he said. I had no idea whether he held the same feelings for me that the other two stallions had, but he maintained military professionalism regardless, and for that I admired him. I’ve always preferred to deal with the military—anyone’s military—over civilians. They’re usually more predictable.

I nodded to Nika and she leaned back against the wall to wait, crossing her arms. The guard opened the door and I stepped through. Celestia’s office was actually decorated to about the same level of swag as the Oval Office. Plush carpet, tasteful trim, and a big wooden desk.

Celestia looked up like she hadn't been expecting me. I wasn't sure the reason for the act, but I had given up on trying to figure her out.

“Thank you for meeting with me, Mr. Canvas,” she said, gesturing me to a chair. “We have a few things to discuss.”

I sat, feeling apprehensive. Knowing her reputation, Celestia probably wouldn't scream. She wouldn't threaten me. I was still guessing that this was going to be unpleasant, though. I asked, “Where should we start?”

“How about with your contract?” She levitated a piece of paper from her side of the desk to mine. It was what I had signed. It still had the same untidy writing produced by my mouth holding the pen. Celestia stared at me. “Mr. Canvas, why did you break the contract?”

“Would it be crazy to say love?” I watched her face. Her pupils might have dilated a little, but the rest of her features were as still as stone.

“It might be,” she replied after a moment.

“I'm not going to apologize. Nika means a lot more to me than you do.”

Celestia sighed. “I can't fault you for that.”

“You're trying to.”

“Mr. Canvas, I know what happened. I wish you had done something else, but what’s done is done.”

I didn’t like her disappointed tone. It felt like she was my mom or something. I pulled a plastic card from the band on my leg and placed it on the desk. “Do you see this? ‘Sail Canvas, Driver's License, Issued by the Commonwealth of Virginia.’ What is that phrase I’ve heard you say on TV - ‘My little ponies?’ Well, I might be pony, but not one of yours. Stop treating me that way.”

Her expression changed slightly. I went on. “You asked me to do something, and I failed. I'm genuinely sorry for that, but I'm not going to roll over and let you guilt-trip me, Princess. The contract only specifies payment for performance. I failed, so I don’t get paid. My girlfriend means more to me than money.”

She studied me for a moment. “Well, I suppose you've made your point.”

“Can I go?”

“You can.” She cracked a smile, surprising me. “Or you can stay and sign a new contract.”

I blinked. “Really?”

“I can also offer something to help with your personal relations.”

“What does—”

She pointed her horn at me, and with a sudden flash of magic the picture on my driver's license was wrong.

Author's Note

Better a short update than none at all, eh? And yes, this section does contain the excerpt I posted in my blog back in October.

Chapter 6

Celestia interrupted my startled swearing. “I must admit, Mr. Canvas, I do have ulterior motives. I originally hired you because you didn’t have a connection to Equestria. Now, even less so.”

“I didn’t ask for this!” It was interesting how my new fingers instinctively curled into a fist as I thought about hitting her.

“I can change you back easily enough,” she said. “I hope you’ll consider what I’m proposing, though.”

I had found that it was usually a good idea to at least hear out those in positions of power, even if I despised them. I awkwardly sat back in the chair and let her continue.

“I need somepony to do a few things,” she said. “Ordinarily I wouldn’t go to so much trouble, but this is one situation that I really don’t need Equestria’s name involved in.”

“This is continuing on from when you originally hired me?” I asked. “What does this have to do with that big event in the Pacific?”

“Everything,” she explained. “It was a burst of magic so large that it affected your dimension. It didn’t come from Equestria, though.”

“So is that why Griffon fighter jets attacked?” I asked.

“Part of the operation was conducted in their territory, yes.”

“Well, I suppose if you want to do things like that, illegal incursion during peacetime, then I can see why you would want a non-Equestrian to handle it. But did I have to be a non-pony?”

“You have a bit of a reputation, Mr. Canvas. If they found you, then they might trace things back. This way, you pass as just another human.” She smiled and added, “And perhaps it might offer you an interesting perspective on your relationship.”

“That’s private!”

“Oh, speaking of privates…” Celestia pointed her horn at me again. I flinched, but the only thing that happened was a set of clothes suddenly appeared on my body. It was a pair of blue jeans and a “I Heart Canterlot” t-shirt where the heart was actually Celestia’s cutie mark.

“Really!?”

She smiled in a way that suggested I was being played with. “You look like a tourist now, someone that would go mostly unnoticed.”

I facepalmed. It didn’t hurt so much now that my eyes were smaller and I wasn’t doing it with hard hooves. “All right, fine. If we’ve gone this far, you might as well tell me everything else about this job.”

She laid out the new contract she had mentioned. “Mr. Canvas, what I need you to do is recover a weapon. Very few ponies know that it exists, and even fewer outsiders.”

I blinked. “Is this some kind of strategic deterrence? Anything with enough power to affect spacetime between the two worlds would have to be incredibly destructive.”

She nodded. “That’s correct. We’ve been able to deflect most inquiries so far. Your government and those of other countries may suspect something like this, but so far we’re sure that they don’t have proof.”

I thought about the top secret message that Major Hiller had been carrying. It said that the US and others knew that something was going on, which backed what Celestia said. I was a little more concerned that Five Eye and Equestria weren’t sharing details. Not that I’ve ever been naive enough to think that the world ran on love and friendship, but it never seemed like a good idea to go behind your friends’ backs.

Still, I certainly didn’t want that weapon to fall into the wrong hands. What if some terrorist brought it into the other dimension? I nodded. “All right, I’m in.”

Celestia picked up the paper and read the main points to me. Equestria would be providing intel, a ship for my use while on this side of the doorway, and advisors. My job was to locate the weapon, and if necessary, recapture it. I would do everything I could to make it seem that Equestria wasn’t involved. Sure it was their weapon, but any mobilization by their forces would make it more obvious that they had lost something.

“Can I get a few more details?” I asked.

“I’ll send somepony to meet with you,” Celestia promised. She got up to see me off. The customary hoof-bump was a little awkward for obvious reasons. I gave her a look to show that I hadn’t entirely forgiven her.

It was a little awkward to walk on two legs with no wings for balance, but I managed. I opened the door and stepped into the hallway. Nika looked up.

“You know how those TV comedians accuse Celestia of being a troll?” I asked. She blinked in confusion, recognizing the voice but the face. I sighed. “They’re right.”

Nika put her hand on my shoulder. “Sail…what happened?”

“Celestia wants us to do a covert job.” I gestured at myself. “She thought I could use a little help with that.”

The guard standing nearby looked like he was having a hard time keeping his eyes off me. I couldn’t blame him. I turned back to Nika. “So how do I look?”

She smiled. “I would definitely take you to dinner and show you off.”

“Speaking of, I’m kind of hungry.” I smiled, a sudden thought coming to me. Turning to the guard, I asked, “Hey, where’s the closest place to get barbecue?”

Chapter 8

I glared at the young pegasus from across the galley table. “Start over. This story isn’t making any sense.”

Penny rolled her eyes. “What part is so hard to get over? Several years ago, my father developed a way to store and transport a large amount of magic. The prototype and I were taken by a cult that wanted to use the power to resurrect the Nightmare. After being rescued, Princess Celestia ordered that the device be kept under government control. Now it’s missing again, along with my father.”

“So let me get this straight: We’re looking for a magical weapon, someone in the Equestrian government dropped the ball on security, and your family is really kidnap-prone.”

This time, Penny glared at me. It was harder to take her seriously since she’d revealed her age as only nineteen. Not that I was too much older, but there was still enough of a gap to make a difference.

“So why didn’t Princess Celestia mention to me that your father is also missing?” I asked.

She shrugged helplessly. “I don’t have any idea. Did she tell you where to start looking? Do you know where he is?”

I got up from the table. “That’s need-to-know information. Stay put.”

Leaving the galley, I met up with Nika who had been listening. We went to find the rest of the crew.

“What do you all think?” I asked.

“If she’s telling the truth, she could be a valuable asset,” said Jones.

“Other than the fact her story is kind of farfetched, a lot of the details she knows match up,” added Andy.

Jeff nodded. “It even casts some doubt on Princess Celestia’s story.”

Agreeing with him, Shep said, “Someone is clearly not telling the whole story here.”

“So who do we trust?” asked Nika. “This random filly, or our employer the Princess?”

I frowned. “It’s depressing that that question isn’t easy to answer. I suppose we’ll keep her, but make sure she’s on a tight leash. We don’t tell her where we’re going or relevant details, and she doesn’t need to know I’m a pony.”

Having settled that, we went on. After agreeing to let Penny stay, she impressed us all with her work. She really knew how to sail. While the rest of us kept the file of information that had been delivered to us away from her, she knew the area better and deduced that we were heading for the Griffon Kingdom.

After getting a moment to myself, I checked the time and made a phone call. There were only a few Iridium-system satellites currently in orbit, although I had heard that more would be launched soon to provide more coverage. Sat phones only worked when one was overhead. The dimensions had been connected for more than two decades and it frustrated me how slow ponies could sometimes be to take up new technology.

Speaking of technology, Celestia had only told me that this device Penny’s father had developed was a weapon. Technically, I supposed a portable source of magic could be for peaceful purposes, but she was probably right. Who would steal it for that?

After a couple of transfers that ate into the valuable time while the satellite was still overhead, I finally got Celestia on the phone. It was not a secure line, so I was careful.

“It’s Sean Carter,” I said. “We had an uninvited guest.”

“Oh really?” I couldn’t tell if Celestia was truly unconcerned, or feigning it for the sake of the unsecure phone.

“Our stowaway claims to know a pony involved with your project. Said he disappeared at about the same time.”

Celestia paused. “I know who you’re talking about.”

“Any details you can give me?” I meant, Why didn’t you tell me about this?

“The missing pony is dead, not disappeared.”

“Then why does my guest think he was kidnapped?”

“You’ll have to ask.”

I grumbled something unpleasant about young mares. Celestia spoke over me. “Please be nice. Your passenger has had a rather rough life.”

There was at least a grain of truth in everything Celestia said, but it was often masked in subterfuge. Her last statement to me seemed to be in completely plain language. I just wished she spoke that way all the time. Maybe I would listen to her more often.

I got off the phone. Going to find Penny to deliver the news that her father was dead was actually not the first thing on my mind. I hadn’t been much older than her when both of my parents died, and had a bit of a hangup about that.

On the other hand, was it my place to keep the information from her? I wrestled with the choice for a while and decided that Celestia’s mission came first. Telling Penny the truth might jeopardize that. It was possible that she was only looking for her father, and couldn’t care less about his device.

I went to re-read the file that Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo had delivered. Some of the details were surprisingly specific, but at some point they trailed off into guessing. It was almost like whoever had put the report together had followed the leads to their conclusion and then announced to the enemy, “Hey, we found the thing you stole. You might want to move it now.”

I frowned. What if that was what happened? What if the three mares had gone after the device, and it was inside that bag I failed to retrieve? If that was true, it certainly explained their hostile attitude towards me, especially after Celestia decided to pull them off the mission and let me try.

I skimmed through the section about the weapon itself. It was a glass sphere a little smaller than a bowling ball that had been made and enchanted in such a way to contain vast amounts of magic that was charged by unicorns. It worked better when there were more ponies feeding energy into it at once. If that much power was let loose, I could see how it could warp the dimensions a little. I wondered if that was just a test of the weapons capability, and if it would be used again on an actual target.

I didn’t know a whole lot about magic. Maybe if I was born and raised in Equestria I might have observed more. I would have thought that such a huge discharge would have been observed by the griffons. Perhaps that was why the fighter jets had been in the area.

I went to check the sails. I was slowly learning how to tie knots with fingers, and wanted to make sure they stayed tight.

“Already got it, skipper,” said Penny, drifting down from the top of the mast. Her attitude had already become more cheerful.

I gave her a curious look. “Where did you pick up that term?” It was typically slang for naval commanding officers in English-speaking countries. I hadn’t heard ponies use it, mostly because it’s hard to skip with four legs.

While trying to come up with a better joke, I watched Penny’s face. She started to reply, but appeared to think better of it. She shrugged. “Just something I heard.”

I couldn’t imagine why she wouldn’t be completely truthful about something like that, but let it go. I understood all too well that each of us needs our secrets.

Chapter 9

It was not a particularly long voyage to the Griffon Kingdom, just a few days. Despite my intentions of not telling Penny anything, I did admit that I worked for a shipbuilding company on Earth. That was a mistake. She knew a surprising amount about that for anyone, much less a teenaged mare. I quickly backpedaled and decided to keep conversation with her to a minimum.

At least her sailing skills made up for awkward social interactions. The borrowed Traveler made record time, the sails trimmed perfectly for the wind. It was almost a shame to pull into port.

Nika and I, backed by Shep and Jeff set out to meet a contact. Penny hadn’t quite earned our trust yet, so Andy, Hawker, and Jones agreed to keep an eye on her back at the boat.

The griffons were slightly less used to people, as most of the doorways were in Equestria, but we didn’t get many stares. There was one named Buck we were going to see. Equestrian special operations was apparently paying him to keep tabs on some of his fellow citizens. He owned a little shop that sold books. As the four of us entered, a little bell above the door rang.

“Be right there,” called a voice. A griffon colored mostly grey came in from a back room. There was a small pair of glasses perched on his beak. “What can I do for you?”

“Name’s Sean Carter,” I said. “I’m looking for information about the northern part of the Kingdom.”

“Oh really?” he said, eyeing me. “It can get rather cold up there in the winter.”

“It’s not a problem. We’re just taking a pleasure cruise,” I said.

Code phrases exchanged, he motioned me into the back room. Nika came with me. Buck twisted the dial on a safe, opening the door and pulling out a disk. I was slightly surprised that it wasn’t printed on paper. I supposed this made it so that it intercepting the information wasn’t as simple as just reading it. It was also easier to transport.

“I kept everything updated,” said Buck, almost sounding proud of himself. “Everything you need is current.”

I had no idea what the information might be, but thanked him.

“Now about compensation,” he said.

I glanced at Nika. Neither of us had heard anything about us paying him. I said, “Bill your usual contacts.”

“I’m just making a living,” he said modestly. “I’d like to do more, but I can’t if I’m scratching for income.”

I doubted he was poor. Still, I’ve always thought that bribes work best when both parties are fully aware what they’re for. I glanced at a nearby shelf, somewhat surprised to see a paperback copy of Moby Dick. I grabbed it. “How much does this cost?”

“Oh, that’s very rare.” He grinned. “I can let it go for one thousand American dollars.”

I pulled out my credit card.

Back at the boat, Andy checked the disk for malware and then slid it into his laptop. It was interesting how he’d roughly managed to duplicate his electronics setup in a mobile environment.

“It’s good stuff,” he said upon opening the data. “We’ve got a list of participants, possible routes and equipment, and coordinates for a target.”

“The target?” I asked.

“I’d say that depends. It’s not tagged ‘mysterious thingy here’ but that could just be a result of our friend Beak not being told what we were after.”

“All right, get us going in that direction.”

Andy pulled out a map of the Griffon Kingdom coastline and began plotting a course. I did a mental facepalm. GPS doesn’t work here. They had a few electronic navigation systems, but they weren’t compatible with equipment from Earth. Still, it was almost nice to brush up on the old-school skills.

We had Penny aloft in the rigging taking bearings for us to pick our way along the coast. Basic navigation is pretty much just a series of trigonometry problems. Draw some straight lines, determine their lengths and relative angles. Simple.

The target site was not ideal. Rocky cliffs faced a small complex of buildings. There wasn’t much terrain surrounding the area to use for cover.

I wondered about the possibility of climbing the cliffs. I kind of regretted letting Celestia turn me into a human now. I was a little surprised when Penny was the one to shoot that idea down.

“Are you kidding? They’re probably expecting an attack from the cliffs even more than from the land. It’s on griffon turf. They’re expecting an attack from opponents who can fly, but either way they're still watching those rocks.”

As much as I hated to admit it, I probably spent too much time on Earth. Even as a pegasus myself, I hadn’t thought of that.

“So what won’t they be expecting?” I questioned.

“How expensive do you want to make this?” asked Penny.

“The contract covers operating expenses,” I said.

She grinned. “What do you know about shipwrecks?”

I thought back to my last boat. “More than I really want to. What are you planning?”

“They would never suspect that we would intentionally crash on the rocks.”

“You’re right, because it’s stupid,” put in Jeff.

“What if we arranged extraction ahead of time?” asked Nika, surprisingly taking Penny's side.

“Would Celestia do that for us?” asked Andy. “She wanted to keep this low profile.”

I turned to Jones. “Can you call anyone?”

“I can try,” she said. “You know the CIA will want to know why we’re doing this.”

“True.” I thought for a moment. “Actually, I have a good idea.” I got up to go find the satellite phone.

“Who are you going to call?” asked Penny.

I thought about telling her “Ghostbusters” but doubted she would get the joke. I made a mental note to get Andy to download a copy the next time he found some internet.

Oh, that was another thing about this side of the doorways. Not enough bandwidth to support high-speed data transfer over satellite. This place was really beginning to get on my nerves.

Chapter 10

I stood at the wheel, frantically trying to compensate for the out-of-balance sails. A casual observer might have thought that they had gotten that way on purpose.

It’s actually not that easy to fake a shipwreck. I was rather glad that an experienced sailor like Penny was along to help, although we had to keep her out of sight to be convincing in our acting as an incompetent, human crew.

Celestia might be a little miffed at ruining the boat she had given to us, but surely a modest sailboat couldn’t be that important to a nation with gold-based currency like Equestria. I steered Traveler towards the rocks.

Briefly taking a look through the binoculars, I spotted a couple of griffons along the rim of the cliff. It was too far away to tell if they were armed, but close enough that they definitely noticed us. I picked up a portable air horn and pressed the button, trying to convey that we had an emergency.

I honked it a couple of times and went back to fighting with the wheel. With the boat nearly out of control, I might actually have a difficult time wrecking it exactly where we had planned. On top of that, everything else had to go perfectly or we would have no fire support and no evacuation.

While I trusted the help we had coming, nobody was infallible. This was still a stupid plan. Lucky for us, our opponents didn’t know that.

I quickly reviewed what I knew about the target. There was no way to tell what kind of force we were facing, but hopefully we could play the innocent shipwreck victims until we got a better handle on the situation.

Penny’s father was dead and Celestia hadn’t mentioned any hostages. Theoretically that meant that anyone we found up there was hostile, which simplified things.

I felt a small shot of guilt at resolving not to tell her until this was finished. Either way, it would be over soon.

One of the guarding griffons came down from the cliff and landed on the boat. “What do you think you’re doing?”

He carried an AK-47, which for some reason was more humorous than it should have been. I maintained my acting role in this and shouted, “We’re heading for shore and can’t get this thing heeled around in the wind!”

The griffon glanced up, looking as if he didn’t know much about sailing. He glared at me. “Try harder.”

“I’m doing everything I can, but I don’t think—”

“Watch out!” shouted Nika, letting the boom swing around, out of control. It was not a planned maneuver and would make the sail react strangely, but she had seen an opportunity and taken it. The boom smacked the griffon in the back of the head and he fell to the deck.

Nika knelt, playing the role of concerned caretaker. The griffon had been knocked out cold. A couple of his friends saw what happened and came to help. Nika stepped back, faux horror on her face. “I’m so sorry!”

And then we hit the rocks. The boat came to a jarring halt, the hull beneath the waterline splintering apart.

“We have to get off!” I shouted. Penny was below decks, and we needed to get out of the area and distract the griffons so she could escape.

There was a jagged fissure in the cliff that ran in a steep diagonal, probably the results of thousands of years of wave pounding. It was not a path, but I thought I could probably get up it with some effort, even if I wasn’t used to this body.

I abandoned ship, jumping to the rocks. Carefully keeping my shirt down to conceal my handgun, I put out a hand to help Nika. The rest followed after us. Earlier, Andy had wiped any relevant information off his electronics, and we had disposed of our sensitive paperwork. If this didn’t play out like we hoped, maybe acting innocent would work.

The griffons had flown away with their injured comrade. While the Russians had sold a lot of weapons to the Griffon Kingdom, like the Flanker jets, I didn’t think these guys were military despite their weapons.

I checked my watch. We were on schedule. I kept climbing. There was still one griffon waiting for us at the top of the cliff as we struggled up to the top. He was suspicious, but wasn’t actually pointing his weapon in our direction. That was a mistake. All seven of us drew pistols. He surrendered.

“We’re looking for a glass ball,” I said. “Know something about that?”

The griffon nodded. I said, “Good. Take us to it. Walk in front so if you lead us into a trap you die first.”

There were two buildings. One had more windows and had the appearance of a place to sleep and eat. The other was more utility-based. We headed for the second, skirting around a main area that had more guards standing around. I saw a few ponies mixed in.

Entering the building, we found a couple of unicorns working on the device. They were arguably more dangerous than the griffons, and I kept a tight grip on my weapon to keep it from being magically taken from me.

“What is all this?” asked one.

“I could ask you the same thing,” I said. “But to answer your question to me, it’s a hostile takeover.”

“Once the rest realize that you’re here, you won’t be leaving,” growled the griffon.

Andy knelt and slipped the globe into a backpack he had brought along. With one less gun ready, one of the ponies bolted for the door. Shooting at him would alert the rest more quickly than if I simply let him go tell them. Also, I’m kind of against shooting anyone in the back if they aren’t actively hostile to me.

Penny darted in after the escapee had left. “Dad?!”

A saw a flash of comprehension on one of the pony’s faces as he realized who she must be. I cracked him on the head before he could say anything.

“He isn’t here,” I said to Penny.

“We have to look for him!”

Going over to the other building to search for a pony who was already dead was just plain stupid. Our extract was coming, and we couldn’t miss it.

With the pony I had let escape, our plan had gone off the rails. I prayed that we wouldn’t need those extra few seconds. When Andy got his bag zipped up the group of us retreated out of the building.

Staying inside probably would have been a better idea. If nothing else, we would have had cover. Coming our way were several griffons and ponies with weapons.

From behind us, there was a flash of light and the distinctive sound of a dimensional doorway opening. A voice shouted, “Get down!”

I hit the dirt and a large amount of automatic gunfire sizzled over my head. The group of armed assailants in front of me broke up, either killed or wounded. Sporadic fire continued to keep the rest of them at bay.

I looked back at who had appeared through the portal. It was the Canadians.

Major Hiller nodded to me, keeping his rifle up and ready. “Come on.”

“We can’t leave my father!” argued Penny. The military man looked a little surprised at her outburst.

This was exactly the situation I didn’t want to be in. I had hoped to leave breaking the bad news until later, hopefully making it Celestia’s responsibility if I could. I cleared my throat. “He isn’t here, Penny.”

“What? Then where is he?”

“He’s dead. This was never planned to be a rescue mission.”

“Then what are we waiting for?” demanded Hiller, shoving us through the doorway. It closed a second later.

We had appeared in a doorway research facility owned by the Canadian government. The experimental equipment was being used to possibly open doorways on command to anywhere that could be plotted. It was revolutionary stuff, as current technology only allowed doorways to be tied to one place.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” asked Penny, looking shell-shocked.

“Now that we’re here, do you mind explaining what kind of secret weapon you recovered from that place?” asked Hiller, speaking over her.

A doorway technician approached. “Sir, there’s a phone call. It’s Princess Celestia.”

Oh, horseapples.

Chapter 11

I don’t know what Celestia said to Major Hiller. Maybe she had some dirt on him, or maybe he just thought her suggestions were good ideas. At any rate, the Canadians let us go about our business.

Andy was still carrying the sphere. We were given permission to leave the country without getting searched or anything. It was considerably easier than the last time we’d been shipwrecked.

The experimental doorway facility was near Ottawa, so they pretty much just drove us to the New York border and kicked us out. Luckily, David Goldstein had made arrangements for transportation to Norfolk. It was faster to get tickets for Amtrak than it was to get duplicate identification for us all to use the doorways.

Penny traveled on the train with us. She hadn’t requested to return to Equestria, and in fact didn’t say much of anything. Until she asked that question again.

“Mr. Carter, if you knew my father was already dead, then why didn’t you tell me?”

“Being completely honest, I thought you would react badly. You had already snuck aboard by the time I realized who you were, and I thought that telling you would have affected the mission.”

Somehow, the two of us had ended up sitting next to each other, and when she turned to glare at me her face was only inches from mine. “If you had told me, I wouldn’t have risked my life by going into that situation looking for him when he wasn’t there.”

Her voice had remained remarkably level. Despite that, I saw Nika giving me disapproving looks from across the aisle. I cleared my throat. “I’m sorry. Given the opportunity to do it over, I would have made different choices.”

Penny looked away for a few seconds. “If I didn’t know about it…how did you find out?”

“After you told me he was missing, I talked to Celestia.”

“She knew? Why didn’t she tell me?”

I raised my eyebrows. “You know her?”

“Well…we’ve met, but it was a long time ago after I was taken and the first time the sphere was taken.” Her expression flashed anger. “My father, though, communicated regularly with her on his project.”

I decided to go out on a limb. “I take it that you don’t care for his work.”

“It’s caused so much trouble,” she admitted. “I was nearly sacrificed by a cult, and now both my parents are dead.”

“Both?”

“My mother was killed when I was taken. The past few years, it’s just been dad and I.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.” And I was. Something like that would make a deep impression on anyone. I hesitantly reached my fingers forward, gently realigning a few feathers in her wings that had gotten tousled.

Penny did not flinch at my touch. She asked, “You got the sphere back?”

“That’s right.”

“Can I ask you a favor?”

I tried to avoid doing favors for just anyone. After learning what Penny had been through, I couldn’t really say no. “What can I do for you?”

“You have a boat, right?”

“I do.”

“Can we go out on the ocean and deep-six this Celestiadamned sphere before it ruins any more lives?”

I nodded. “Yes, we can.”

Penny seemed impressed by Traveler. My Traveler, that is. I was somewhat surprised at her knowledge of turbine engines and slightly frightened by what she knew about fire control systems for military-grade weapons.

We took a day trip out past the continental shelf and chucked the glass ball into three thousand feet of water. None of us were sorry to see it go. We all might be in the business of weapons, but it had become clear that this thing was much more trouble and pain than it was worth.

As we were headed home with the sunset in front of us, Penny stood with Nika and I on the bridge wing. The weather was pleasant, and Penny’s mood seemed to have improved.

“Thank you for this,” she said. “I’m sorry for what it must have cost in fuel and maintenance to get a ship this size moving, even for just one day.”

I shrugged. “I agreed with what you wanted. And anyway, the real loss of funds is going to come from Canterlot. I was hired to get the device back, not throw it away.”

“This may not be the best time to ask you about employment, then,” she said.

“You don’t have anything better to do?” I asked.

“I don’t really have much family left. I’m finished with high school. I love sailing.”

I considered that. “Where did you get all your experience?”

“Self training on any vessel that would have me, mostly. On the weekends I used to be volunteer crew for any boat I could find.”

“What started that?”

She cut her eyes to the side as if someone might be listening in on our conversation out in the middle of the ocean. “This is highly classified information, both by your government and Equestria’s. You probably have the clearance. Anyway, back in 2005, USS Cushing had a little problem. That was the cult, trying to bring about a new age of Nighmare Moon. I spent some time on the ship, and decided I liked it.”

I frowned. I had been told stories about Nightmare Moon, but as a non-Equestrian they hadn’t had the same effect on me. I had heard of the destroyer named Cushing before, as it had been transferred to the Equestrian Navy at about the same time Penny had described.

She went on. “There was a lot of magical fallout—literally and figuratively—from that incident, and in the end it was decided to just sign the ship over to Equestria. I’m pretty sure Princess Celestia did some careful bargaining and got the better deal.”

I nodded. “Sounds like her.”

“So how do you know the Princess?” asked Penny. “Do you do a lot of operations for her?”

“No, this is the first time.”

“I was meaning to ask, why did she hire a human, anyway?”

Nika bumped my arm. I caught her hint. Penny had just broken national security to tell me a little about herself. Doing the same shouldn’t hurt too much.

“Actually, I’m a pony. To keep suspicion of this operation away from Equestria, Celestia transformed me. Also, I think it amused her.”

Penny stared at me for a moment. “Okay, I suppose that makes sense. I thought you knew an awful lot about feathers for a human. But…what about you, Ms. Ivanova? Why fake the Russian accent?”

“It’s not fake,” she explained. “I am from Russia. Sean Carter—Sail Canvas—is the only pony on the crew.”

“So wait, you two…” Penny’s mouth dropped open, fumbling for words.

“Yeah, the romance was awkward for a while,” I acknowledged.

A couple of days later, Penny and I were in Canterlot to meet with Celestia. She didn’t jerk us around this time, although I wasn’t sure if that was because Penny was present or if Celestia’s attitude had changed.

She was visibly upset when I told her what had been done with the device. “Mr. Canvas, I can understand mistakes, but you deliberately disobeyed your contract.”

Penny broke in. “With my father dead, I should be the one to inherit his work. I chose to get rid of it. Why does Equestria need something like that? Certainly not strategic deterrence—that only works when the whole world knows you have it. This way, we can just put everything behind us and forget about it.”

Celestia reluctantly seemed to agree with that, but there was still the issue of the contract. “I can’t pay you for this. Despite recovering the sphere, you didn’t return it as stipulated.”

I nodded. “I suspected as much.”

“Mr. Canvas, may I ask you why you seem so hostile? I don’t think you’ve ever been pleasant any time we’ve spoken.”

I considered that for a moment. “You’re the leader of a country, several thousand years old, and one of the most powerful magical beings in existence. Truthfully, you’re probably more humble about it than you could be, but I still get the feeling that you like to flaunt it.”

“You’re not used to be controlled?” she asked. “Is that because you grew up wealthy? Are you unable to accept that sometimes you can’t do whatever you want?”

Her words stung, but I knew that they were true. While I should have just nodded quietly and accepted it, I couldn’t go down without a fight. Namely, pointing out something that had been bugging me for a while. “At least I’ve been completely truthful with you the whole time.”

Celestia bowed her head slightly in admission. “While concealing reality is against my personal morals, sometimes it is necessary. I know you aren’t naive enough to believe otherwise, Mr. Canvas.”

She had a point. I nodded, even if I didn’t like it.

“For instance, what good came of your boat, Corsair, sinking?”

I thought. “The CIA and Navy let me off on the debts I owed them. The Chinese became less suspicious of me. I was freed up to do this job for you.”

“Mr. Canvas, I ordered Apple Bloom, Scootaloo, and Sweetie Belle to sink your boat.”

I couldn’t believe that I hadn’t thought of that before. I never saw an incoming torpedo with my own eyes. The damage was careful not to injure anyone. We were close to shore when it happened. It had been timed so the new ship was almost complete when the old one went down.

Strangely enough, I decided that it was a reasonable tradeoff. I still didn’t like Celestia, but I had come away with an advantage because of what she had done.

“I have a proposal, if you’re willing to listen,” said Celestia, interupting my thoughts. “Since adding Ponyville to our fleet, we have a number of weapons that I believe are compatible with your ship. I’m willing to arm you if it would keep your services on retainer for Equestria.”

Ponyville was ex-Cushing, the destroyer Penny had told me about. I wondered how Celestia knew what weapons my ship was equipped with, but remembered that her three secret agents had been aboard and took notes. Gun ammunition and a few missiles were compatible between the two vessels.

I sighed. It felt like I was getting hooked again, but it was really good bait. “I suppose I’ll make that deal.”

Celestia nodded. “I’ll have the arrangements drawn up.”

The meeting seemed to be over, but we hadn’t touched on something very important. I said, “So about this species-switching thing…”

“I was meaning to ask,” she said. “How was your experience?”

“I can’t say that I hated it, but it’s not who I am. On top of that, I can’t really go about as Sean Carter for the rest of my life. Too many people know me as a pony and would wonder what happened.”

“What about your girlfriend?” asked Celestia.

I paused. A sudden thought had just struck me. “You can’t make me choose one or the other. In fact, I would bet swapping back and forth isn’t impossible.”

“You assume a lot,” she said. “You are, however, correct.”

She tapped a button on the intercom box on her desk. “Twilight, please come in.”

A purple unicorn mare entered with a small box. She nodded to Penny as if the two of them knew each other.

“This is Twilight Sparkle, magical researcher and colleague of Penny’s father,” introduced Celestia. I thought I might have heard her name somewhere before, but couldn’t remember where.

“When Princess Celestia told me about your situation, I thought there might be something we could do,” said Twilight. She opened the box and took out a modest-looking necklace. “With the right enchantments and a lot of work, we were able to come up with this. Putting it on over your head changes you. If you take it off by unclasping it you stay the same. Putting it on with the clasp and slipping it off changes you back.”

“This sounds like science fiction,” I commented.

For some reason, Twilight appeared to take that as a compliment. She handed over the necklace and I put it on. While the transition was a little jarring, it did work as advertized. Despite being told what would happen, the look on Penny’s face was priceless.

I struggled out of my clothes. That was something I didn’t particularly like about being human. “I suppose I should thank you. I figured that the technology—er, magic I suppose—existed, but didn’t know you were actually working on it.”

The look on Celestia’s face suggested that there was a lot I didn’t know. At the moment, however, I wasn’t particularly inclined to ask. I might end up as yet another species.

“We’re pretty limited in our ability to produce these things,” said Twilight. “Not only that, but it gives us a big advantage in deception. This is not something that’s going to go public for quite a while—if ever.”

“I wouldn’t want to tell anyone anyway,” I said. I frowned. “Are you saying that someday I might run into Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo as people?”

Celestia smiled impishly. “Be ready, Mr. Canvas. I’ll have a job for you eventually.”

Penny and I left. There seemed to be a lot on her mind, and she didn’t say much. The two of us went back through the doorway to Norfolk. Her previous inquiry about employment had evolved into formal service with the company. She was young, but legal age. I had floated the idea of on-the-job training for taking care of her college. University-level education in Equestria was not nearly as common as Earth, mostly because the special talents of ponies typically did not require higher learning.

Penny’s talent was actually money managing. While I already had an accountant, I figured we could work something out. Regardless of her cutie mark, she was still an excellent sailor.

Back at the boat, I went to find Nika. The gift from Celestia was a pretty big deal, especially in terms of the effect it would have on our relationship.

After I explained how the magic functioned, she looked thoughtful. “Would it work on someone else?”

“I suppose it wouldn’t hurt to try.” Unclasping it, I passed it to her. She put it around her neck, and then slipped it off over her head. Then she dropped to the floor in a pile of ill-fitting clothing.

There were a few mild swears in Russian as I untangled her. As a pony raised on Earth, I might have had a grip on human customs and mindset, which made it stranger to see Nika as a mare than it was to find myself as a man.

She had turned into a pegasus. Nika examined her wings and turned to me with a mischievous look. “Want to have sex on a cloud?”

I grinned. “You’re the perfect one for me.”

Chapter 7

The triple pain-in-my-hindquarters known as Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo intercepted Nika and I as we left the castle. I think both we and they were unhappy to see the other, but it was Celestia’s orders.

“Can this wait until after lunch?” I asked. “I’ve got the post-species-switch munchies.”

That excused worked, and they agreed to come eat with us. I think more to keep an eye on me rather than to be sociable. There was a place run by griffons in the southern district of Canterlot that had pig on the menu. I ordered a whole rack of ribs.

They were served “New York Style,” which didn’t make any sense to me. Probably just a fancy name catering to those who were only passingly familiar with Earth. The sauce and marinade wasn’t the greatest, but now that I had fingers to pick up the bones, sharp teeth to gnaw them, and the digestive system to handle it, I didn’t much care. I’ll admit I may have enjoyed myself a little too much watching the three mares give me disgusted looks as I enthusiastically dug into the meal.

Nika paid the bill. I had my credit cards, but I didn’t look like “Sail Canvas” anymore. I made a mental note to get some new identification paperwork made up.

After eating we headed to a quiet spot in the park. While Apple Bloom and Scootaloo patrolled to keep curious or malicious listeners away, Sweetie Belle told us the news. There was a ship waiting for us in the Baltimare harbor. She read off the ID numbers and location.

“What sort of weaponry is it fitted with?” I asked.

“Nothing. Princess Celestia has given you a pass to import your own small arms, but I would recommend being discrete. Remember, this is a covert mission.”

We discussed a few further details. There wouldn’t be a place for a helicopter aboard, so Shep and Jeff would roll in with the regular crew. After finalizing accommodations, Sweetie handed me a thick package of information concerning the details of the mission. She gave me a look. “I shouldn’t have to say it, but this file is too important to loose.”

I wondered if she was referencing to the bag I had failed to retrieve. I shrugged. “So why did you say it?”

She breathed out carefully, as if determined not to let me anger her. After forming up with the other two mares, they left the park. Nika and I got up and headed towards the doorway terminal. She took my hand, a smile on her lips. She was wearing her playful look. I asked what was on her mind. After she told me, I decided that it would be nice to get back as quickly as possible.

We went through customs in record time and back on Earth booked a taxi with an extra tip for speed. Shortly after arriving at our hotel room, I was able come up with a pretty good reason why being human might not be so bad after all.

We didn't get weird or anything. She didn't call herself my little filly. In fact, there wasn't much talking at all. Despite the lack of conversation, neither one of us got much sleep that night.

Ahem, attention please. My name is Sail Canvas, President of Canvas Shipbuilding. Yes, I did have sexual relations with that woman.

And it was awesome.

A few days passed, and we accumulated all the things that would be needed for moving aboard the loaner ship. I was particularly interested in becoming proficient with shoulder-fired weapons. There should be some spare time built into our schedule for that.

After meeting up with the rest of the crew, all of us arrived back though the doorway at Balitmare. It was an Equestrian Navy port, and I had a look at some of their vessels when I had the chance. I made sure to keep ugly shirts on and my camera obvious. Might as well play the dumb tourist angle.

I was carrying a new passport with the name Sean Carter in it. It had passed inspection and been stamped at the terminal, so it seemed to be a good fake. We rented a small truck to transport all of us and our gear to the marina.

Andy was reading the ship’s information and guided me along the wharf. I was relearning how to drive, and figured I needed the practice. He called, “It should be right here.”

It was a ship, all right. A sailing ship. I couldn’t believe that this hadn’t come up in conversation when Nika and I were getting the briefing. They wanted us to conduct this operation while depending on the unreliable breeze? And how many people in the crew knew anything about wind sailing?

After a quick check with the marina office to make sure this wasn’t a cruel joke, we reluctantly began loading our gear aboard. To add further insult to injury, the vessel was named Traveler. I wondered if Celestia had done that on purpose.

The “ship,” which I only jokingly referred to it as, had two masts, and was eighty feet long. There were six cabins, so with Nika and I sharing, and Andy and Hawker doing the same, that left us with a spare. Without designated places for a lot of our gear, we piled our extra junk there.

Through the afternoon, we worked on getting everything ready and doing a little bit of training. Andy had read, and probably memorized, a book about sailing. I was an expert, and Shep had some experience. The three of us worked with the others so the crew as a whole wouldn’t be totally incompetent when we left the next morning. The boat did at least have a pusher motor, but it was barely enough to maneuver dockside.

As the sun was beginning to set, a young pegasus mare with a scarlet coat came walking by as if looking at all the boats. As I studied her, it seemed like she was looking for something specific. She spotted us working on the boat and came over.

“Hey there,” she called. “Are you going to be going out soon?”

“No, just doing some practice for next week’s trip,” I told her.

“Need some help? I know a lot about sailing.”

I looked at her a little more carefully. While her cutie mark was a couple of coins—not anything maritime related—her feathers had the look of somepony who spent a lot of time in salt air. I had found the solution for that was careful grooming with a shampoo for dry pelts, although I didn’t say that and make her suspicious that such advice was coming from a human.

“Sorry, it’s just going to be a pleasure cruise. You’d be bored to death, and we hadn’t really budgeted for an extra crew member.”

“I’ll just work for meals,” she offered. Her voice didn’t sound desperate for employment. Did she really want to just go sailing that much?

It would be nice to have some more experience, although I had no idea how much this mare might have. She looked young. I couldn’t see many advantages of having her along. There were plenty of disadvantages.

I debated for a moment how to brush her off. Maybe experiment with prejudice and tell her hoofers weren’t welcome aboard. I sure had plenty of similar remarks saved up. Of course it wasn’t speciesist for me, because I was a pony.

Eventually, I came up with, “Sorry, there isn’t a position open.” I turned away and went back to help with preparation.

Out of respect for everyone else aboard the silent boat, Nika and I kept it quiet that night. In the morning everyone pitched in to put the final touches on the sail rigging and get untied from the pier. The wind was decent, and we were able to shove off without many problems.

I studied charts of the Equestrian Sea. I had made sure to get copies of both the Equestrian surveys as well as those from the US National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration. The NOAA stuff was a format I was used to. The pony equivalent had more local knowledge. Between the two, they should cover everything.

We set the sails and got things organized for the trip ahead. At least the boat tacked nicely in the wind. I had never actually been aboard such a large sailboat before, preferring to spend my time doing more interesting things. With such a long sleek hull, the speed should be fairly nice.

The day passed slowly, but at least it wasn’t too boring. We were all getting used to the new boat and its quirks. Those, thankfully, weren’t many or severe.

Jeff came up to me in the midafternoon. “I found a red feather stuck in the weather stripping around the aft deck storage.”

He was referring to a small box mounted to the deck and used for storing equipment. I thought for a moment. “When was the last time that was accessed?”

“Early yesterday, I think.”

That’s what I remembered. When I last looked, there weren’t feathers of any kind stuck in it.

Jeff added, “It looked like the same color as the pony who stopped by yesterday.”

I nodded. “Are you thinking what I’m thinking?”

“I’ll go get a shotgun and some help,” he said.

I walked back to the place where a red feather was just barely sticking out of the concealing compartment. Had the mare really stowed away for so long? Even if she’d come aboard during the early hours of the morning while we were asleep, that was still more than half a day.

Jones, Andy, and Jeff showed up. I put my hands near the compartment cover. Jeff stepped forward with his weapon. I yanked the cover back and he pumped the action to add the intimidating clack-clack noise as light flooded in on our uninvited guest.

I plunged my hand down while she was still disoriented and pinched the leading edge of her wing right where it met her side. It was not really painful, but the compressed muscle lost effectiveness and my grip was on top of some of the important flight feathers. Any pegasus would instinctively stay put to avoid damage to them. The mare could probably break loose if desperate, but she was in an enclosed space with a gun pointed at her.

I kept my other hand up to block in case she decided to kick. For the moment, however, the pony lay still, or perhaps petrified with fear.

I glanced at the coins of her cutie mark. “Listen, Loose Change—”

“I’m Penny.”

“Well, I’m pissed off that you snuck aboard my boat.”

“Let me go,” she said. “I know something that you don’t.”

That was not a very convincing argument. However, what was the worst case if I freed her? She would fly away and not disturb us anymore? I eased up and took my hand away.

Penny sat up. Jeff had lowered the shotgun, but still held it threateningly. This was clearly more intense than the reaction she had expected from us, although I had no idea what she was actually hoping to face by stowing away. She looked even younger and less experienced than before.

The mare gulped as if gathering courage and looked at me. “If you’re working for the Princess, there’s something important you should know.”