Avisus Gaiuni Psychuarere

Avisus Gaiuni Psychuarere

“I mean, I know he was just doing all that stuff to try to impress me or whatever, but still. It was fun! And I learned a whole lot more about pegasi with Thunderlane than I did with Derpy,” Twilight rambled, still riding the high of her previous stunt flying.

Carrot Top listened half-attentively, more interested in eating her food than hearing about what Twilight did with some stallion. Not that she was jealous, she just didn’t wanna hear it.

“Oh, and guess what?” Twilight asked.

Carrot Top hastily swallowed before answering. “What?”

“Okay, you didn’t hear it from me, but Thunderlane…” she paused for dramatic effect, “…likes Rarity.”

The juice escaped Carrot Top’s lips with such vigor that a good portion of it ended up all over Twilight’s face. “Really? Rarity?!?”

Twilight wiped herself clean of Carrot Top’s juice-saliva combo and shot her a half-annoyed glare, causing her target to giggle at the apparently funny face. “Yep. I think. I don’t know, actually. His face got really warm when he got near any mare, but with Rarity it was a little warmer than usual. That means something, right?”

The yellow mare rolled her eyes. “Yeah. That totally means something, Twilight.” She apparently had to work on her sarcasm; Twilight didn’t seem to pick up on it.

“Yes! I knew it!” she exclaimed, smashing her hooves together in glee. Carrot Top decided not to interrupt the strange display, instead focusing on her food. Or the lack thereof.

She got up and plopped her dishes by the kitchen sink, then walked to the front door. “Welp, thanks for the food again, Twilight. I gotta go set up shop, see ya.”

“Bye!”

The door creaked and clicked shut, then all was quiet. Twilight continued to eat her food excitedly, both from the thrill of high-speed flying and from going 24 hours without eating. In hindsight, she should’ve asked Carrot Top to force-feed her some mushed vegetables or something, but it was too late for that. With Thunderlane being her last pegasus to study, she wouldn’t be able to put her new feeding plan into action.

But as excited as Twilight was at finishing her research, she was hesitant. It wasn’t that she thought something would go wrong- she’d made sure every possible outcome was accounted for-, it was just the kind of hesitation that came with starting the main phase of a project. As with the coming of every magical project’s main phase, Twilight decided to clean up her dishes later and write Celestia a letter.

Dear Princess Celestia,

The quill clacked against the wooden desk when Twilight dropped it, too excited about sending her letter to care. She almost called for Spike, but caught herself before any sound came out. Instead, she tucked her letter into a saddlebag and left the library.

“Hey, Twilight!” somepony said. Twilight answered cheerily, turning her head but not looking at who she was talking to.

“Where ya goin’?”

“Derpy’s.”

“Why?”

“So Spike can send a letter for me.”

“Why can’t you?”

“Because Spike does for me.”

“But can’t you?”

“Nope.”

“Why not?”

Twilight was starting to get sick of the questions, so she turned to face her verbal assaulter. Then she facehoofed for not recognizing the voice earlier.

“Look, Pinkie, I’m in a hurry right now. Can we do this later?”

Pinkie looked around, eyes narrowed curiously. After a few moments of searching, she turned back to Twilight. “Sure! But what are we doing?”

“We’re… I don’t know. But can we do it later?”

“Okie dokie lokie!” the pink party pony chirped, prancing away to pester some other pony.

Twilight breathed a sigh of relief, continuing on her path to Derpy’s. Which just so happened to be right in front of her face, the door already wide open. Dinky was looking off to where Pinkie seemed to be headed, but turned when she heard Twilight approaching her.

“Hey, Twilight! Whatcha doin’ here?”

“Oh, I’m just here so Spike can send a letter to Princess Celestia. I won’t be long,” she said, following Dinky inside. She turned the corner into the living room, where Spike was sitting in front of a game board. Dinky threw herself onto a pillow on the other side, using her hooves to prop her head up as she stared at their game.

“Hey Twilight,” Spike said, apparently not as excited about receiving a visit as Dinky.

Twilight removed the letter from her bags. “Hey Spike, what are you playing?”

“Slides and Stairs.”

“Oh? And how do you play?”

Spike knew when Twilight wanted something to be done, so he decided to stop humoring her. “What do you want?”

The unicorn attempted to feign ignorance, pretending she’d dropped the letter by ‘accidentally’ letting her grip on it loosen. “Oh, right. Could you send this letter to Princess Celestia for me?” she asked, picking up the paper and waving it around in front of her.

“You came all the way here for that?”

“Well, of course I did. How else would I send it?”

Spike rolled his eyes. “Oh, I dunno, magic?”

Twilight decided not to answer, instead waving the letter around just a little bit more. She even tilted her head a little bit and smiled. Spike sighed and grabbed it, then burned it and watched as the ashes traveled out an open window.

“There, happy?”

“Yes, Spike. Thank you very much.” Twilight’s business was over, but she decided to just sit there, watching Spike and Dinky play Slides and Stairs. It took her a while to realize that watching other ponies play games she had no clue how to play was boring. She jumped off the couch and picked up her bags. “Well, I gotta get back to the library. Bye!”

“Bye,” Spike and Dinky called simultaneously, not looking up from their game.

Twilight left the room and headed down the hall, conveniently bumping into Derpy.

“Twilight? What are you doing here?”

“Oh, I just dropped by to send a letter. See you tomorrow!”

“You’re leaving? Without even staying for lunch?”

Ahhh, staying over for food. Twilight’s old arch-nemesis. But Twilight had a few tricks up her sleeve, the major one being Derpy’s inability to see at the moment. Which conveniently disabled Derpy from stopping her. So she left, without saying a word.

Pacing. One of Twilight’s favorite thinking exercises, along with talking to herself while she thought. She wasn’t sure about a whole lot of things.

“Okay, so if I start with the pegasus, then I’ll have the more complicated one done first, which will make the earth pony that much easier. But if I start with the earth pony, I’ll be more experienced so the complicated parts on the pegasus will be easier.”

The rough circle she was walking in wasn’t quite at the engraving or trench level yet, but it was considerably cleaner and smoother than every other part of the floor.

“Maybe I should finish up one of them before going on to the next one, so the other one can have time to adjust to living. But then one will be more adjusted than the other one. Is that bad? Maybe I should just make them both first, then give them some life at the same time.”

If she were paying any attention at all to the outside world, she would be just a little bit dizzy. Probably a bit irritated from the constant clacking of her hooves contacting wood, too.

“But if I’m going to be making both of them first, I should gather up everything I need before I even start. But then what if I need something I don’t have? Should I just get more materials as I go along? But will that mess with the age differences between different body parts? Will that even matter?”

Twilight didn’t even notice when Carrot Top walked in. Not even when the latter tried to get her attention by yelling her name. Carrot Top knew what to do when Twilight got into heavy thinking mode, so she just went about her business as though the librarian wasn’t even there.

“Wait a minute. Can’t I just get one of Rarity’s plastic models to serve as a base? Then I can just reshape it and change all of the plastic into tissues. Hmmm, I’d need her to take some measurements of me first. Or maybe I could cover myself in silicone and use that as a mold.”

Her lunch break was over, so Carrot Top left the library without saying a word. She knew Twilight wouldn’t have even heard her.

“But then I’ll have excess material… I could just give it all to Rarity or somepony else. But how would I convince them to join with me? Why can’t I just give myself wings and more magic? Isn’t that basically the same thing? I already know how to do everything. Why do I need to go through all this trouble?”

Twilight stopped pacing. Her mind pulled a blank. She couldn’t think of any reason as to why she couldn’t do it, other than Starswirl never saying she could. But Starswirl never said she could make a sandwich, and she made one a few days ago. There was one way to resolve that particular problem: another letter to Celestia.

She sat down at her writing desk once again, quill floating effortlessly above the page before her.

Dear Princess Cele

The door slammed open. “Twilight! Twilight!”

She turned to face Spike. “What is it?”

“Letter from Celestia! Here!” he yelled, flopping tiredly to the ground, claw outstretched. Twilight grabbed the letter from him and began to read. Out loud. Because why not.

“My most faithful student, I’m delighted to hear of Derpy’s recent improvements. It’s clear that your magical abilities have grown very much during your stay in Ponyville. Be that as it may, I regret to inform you that I do not support your current endeav- What?!?”

Spike prepared himself for the incoming craziness by fleeing to the kitchen.

“What does she mean, she ‘doesn’t support my current endeavor’? She was just here a few days ago, acting like everything was perfectly fine! Does she- Spike!” she called, apparently now curious as to where her number one assistant went off to. “Spiiiiike!”

The dragon risked peeking out from the kitchen. “What?”

“C’mon, we’re going to Canterlot,” Twilight said, packing up a few things in her saddlebags.

“But why? Can’t you just send Celestia a letter or something?”

That idea was so unheard of and completely off the wall that Twilight dropped her things and walked to Spike. “No, I can’t just ‘send her a letter or something’. This is big, Spike. Big! I have to convince her to let me do this, not just in writing! Now come on, we’re going to Canterlot.”

“Right now?”

“Yes, right now.”

“But… But what about Carrot Top?”

“Yeah, she can come, too. Now get ready, we’re leaving right when I get back.”

Twilight looked from Carrot Top to Spike critically. She supervised Carrot Top’s packing herself- it was her first time to Canterlot, so Twilight had to make sure she was prepared- but didn’t have time to watch over Spike.

“Did you get everything?”

“Yup.”

“Toothpaste? Toothbrush? Blanket? Pillow?” she listed off, receiving a nod and a ‘Yup’ after each one. She decided to have a little bit of fun. “Picture of Rarity?”

“Yup.”

Spike’s eyes shot open after he realized what he just said. “Wait! I mean, no! Well- I mean… How’d you know?”

Twilight and Carrot Top were too busy laughing to answer.

Spike simply rolled his eyes. “Yeah, sure, laugh it up you guys. Real funny.”

His unicorn caretaker stopped to wipe a tear from her eye and walked over to him. “Oh, come on Spike. You know I’m just kidding.” She threw a hoof around him and held him for a moment. “And look, there’s the train.”

He looked, and there it was. The train. How exciting.

As dull and train-like the train was, Spike was happy to see it. It was the perfect salvation from Twilight’s attempt at an apology, so he hopped in and ran straight for his room.

“Spike, wait!” Twilight turned to Carrot Top, then back to the train, and groaned. Once Carrot Top was by her side, she walked in.

It was just after dinner time, so none of the three were tired enough to even bother trying to get some sleep. Instead, they decided to play Slides and Stairs. Since neither Twilight nor Carrot Top knew how to play, Spike decided to become a teacher.

“Okay, first you pick a playing piece and put it here,” he said, reaching for the blue unicorn colt and placing it beside square number one. Carrot Top and Twilight did the same, Carrot Top with the red unicorn mare and Twilight with the pea-green earth mare.

“Now spin the dial. Highest number goes first.” He spun the dial and got a two. Carrot Top spun and got a five. So did Twilight.

Twilight looked up to Spike for further instruction.

“You tied, so spin again.” Twilight and Carrot Top spun again, getting a four and a one.

“Okay Twilight, you go first. Spin the dial and move that many squares.” Twilight spun, got a four, and moved four squares. “You landed on a staircase, so follow it to where it ends.” She dragged her piece along the staircase, landing on square 14.

“Okay. Now it’s my turn,” Spike said, spinning the dial and moving five spaces.

Carrot Top needed no instruction. She grabbed the dial, spun it as hard as she could, and got a one. Twilight snickered.

“Hey, don’t laugh!” She moved her piece one space and followed the staircase all the way up to 38. “Ha! What’d I tell ya?”

“What?” Twilight went into full-on whining mode. “That’s not fair!”

“Ohohoh, but it is, good madam.”

“Nuh-uh!” came Twilight’s witty comeback, sticking out her tongue and scrunching up her face for added intimidation.

Since Carrot Top was so much more mature than Twilight, she reached forward and grabbed the oh-so intimidating tongue. “Haha, gotcher tongue!”

“Ey! Gibbit back!”

Spike watched the childish fight with mixed emotions. He was intrigued, confused, disgusted, and amused all at once. The thought to intervene and stop the foolishness crossed his mind, but he dismissed it. It was funny.

The tongue-fight turned into a wrestling match turned into something so strange Spike didn’t know what he was even watching. Eventually the war was over, Carrot Top having surrendered after an agonizing magical tickle assault.

“Cheater.”

Twilight poked Carrot Top’s side. “Not my fault you’re ticklish.” Carrot Top slapped the hoof away with mock anger, her smile making it completely obvious that she didn’t really mind.

Twilight, the victorious victor, spun the dial and got a two. She moved her earth pony piece two spaces and, lo and behold, she landed on a slide. “Wait. Do I have to go on the slide?”

Spike answered with a snarky smile. “Yes, you have to go on it.”

“But it goes down.”

“So? Then you go down.”

Hesitantly, she slid her piece all the way down to space four, crossing her hooves and pouting at the way the game was going.

Seven games later, her pout turned into a full-blown frown.

“How in all of Equestria do you go from 28 to 84 seven times in a row?!?”

Carrot Top, who won all seven games, rose her hooves defensively. “Hey, you got on that staircase once, too.”

“Yeah, but then I got sent down to 24 from that stupid slide! I don’t get it! If you go backwards if you go on the slide, why can’t you just, oh, I dunno, not go on it?”

“Because that’s not how the game works, Twilight.”

“Yes, Spike. I know that’s not how the game works. But if I don’t wanna go down a slide, why-“

“Excuse me miss, but could you please keep it down? We’ve been getting numerous noise complaints in this area.”

Twilight blushed and grinned, nodding silently in reply. The stallion who addressed her slid the door shut and left, his mission accomplished.

Door sliding apparently led to yawns, because their room was soon filled with them.

“Alright, I’mma get some sleep. G’night, guys,” Spike called out, crawling into the top bunk of the bunk bed.

Twilight yawned again and got into the bottom bunk. “Yeah, me too. Night, Spike. Night, Carrot Top.”

Carrot Top shuffled her hooves, looking around at the lack of extra beds. And couches. And chairs, for that matter. There weren’t even any friggin’ rugs.

“Umm, Twilight?” she asked.

Twilight spun around, her half-lidded eyes focused on Carrot Top. “What?”

“Well, there’s no other beds, and…”

“Sure, c’mon.”

Carrot Top climbed up onto the bed and snuggled up under the covers, making sure she didn’t accidentally rub up against Twilight. “Thanks,” she whispered, and the two settled down to sleep.

The sunlight bore into her eyes with such intensity that Carrot Top turned around because she didn’t want to wake up. It didn’t even matter what time it was. She was too tired and too comfortable to ever want to get up out of bed.

Two seconds later, she heard a thud and a yelp. Since any noise followed by a yelp was never a good thing, Carrot Top spun around to see what was being so noisy.

“Urrrghhhh…” Twilight moaned, lying face-first on the ground. Carrot Top, being the kind and considerate mare she was, just laughed.

The floor-bound unicorn was confused. She didn’t remember sleeping on the floor. Nor did she remember when Carrot Top got in her bed.

“Carrot Top? What’re you doing in my bed?” she asked.

The all-too-comfortable mare just giggled. “There weren’t any other beds, remember?”

“Oh, right.” Twilight rubbed her head and walked out, mumbling something about early mornings or whatever. Carrot Top couldn’t really make it out.

She was still way too tired and way too comfortable to even bother moving, so she didn’t. Although she knew she wouldn’t be falling asleep any time soon, she closed her eyes and wrapped more of the blanket around herself.

“Aaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…” Spike yawned and stretched, just the slightest bit of fire escaping his mouth as he did so. The fire apparently dried out his lips, because he started smacking them. Carrot Top peeked up to the top bunk and saw his feet dangling over the edge.

A purple blur, a yell, and a thud followed.

Carrot Top couldn’t handle it. She writhed beneath the blanket, struggling to put a cap on her ceaseless laughing.

“Yeah, yeah, very funny.” Spike rubbed his head, which caused his stomach to growl for whatever reason. “I’mma get something to eat. You want anything?”

“Nah, I’m good. I’ll just lay here for a while. Too tired.”

“Alright, see ya.”

The room door slid open, the pitter-patter of Spike’s little feet hitting the floor followed, then the door slid shut.

Content to do exactly what she told Spike she would, Carrot Top didn’t move an inch. The blanket was soft, the mattress was made of that memory foam stuff so it was soft, too. The soft softness was so soft she thought she would never be so comfortable for the rest of her life.

Then there was a scream. One long, agonizing scream from some other train car. Everything was dreadfully silent for a few long moments afterwards, then another scream echoed throughout the train. And another. And soon Carrot Top’s ears were filled with the screaming of the train’s passengers.

The door split in half and a stallion came crashing through, landing in a heap on the floor. Carrot Top flew up and crashed into the top bunk, and all the screams and thuds were replaced by a single, consistent noise. Everything was a blur. She registered herself sliding on the floor, then a wall, then through a window. And everything went black.

Carrot Top woke up, numb all over, her head still ringing. She looked around. There was black smoke coming up from beyond a hill, so she got up.

Pain shot through both of her back hooves and she looked back. They were bruised, cut, bleeding, and broken. A fragment of her bone was sticking up midway down her left hoof. She pushed down on it and it slid back beneath her skin, a fresh stream of blood leaking out from the wound.

She decided then that she should get a move on before her numbness turned to agonizing torment. She dragged herself forward with her front hooves. Up the hill she went, a river of blood oozing out from her body and pooling at the bottom of the hill.

Carrot Top reached the top a few minutes later and looked out at the wreckage of the train. Entire train cars were detached and split into pieces, mangled and burning. The grass surrounding the area was lit up in flames, and she saw small piles of burning bodies littered amongst the metal.

The smell of burnt flesh filled her nose, the screams of dying ponies and foals reaching her ears. There was one in particular that stood out among the rest, and she looked down. Twilight was there, pulling herself up towards Carrot Top. Her intestines were stretched out, her lower body trapped underneath a sheet of metal. Her body was on fire. Her hoof reached for Carrot Top and she coughed up blood, then collapsed onto the hillside.

Carrot Top ran down the hill, tripping over the bloodied body of a young foal. She rolled down and eventually stopped beside Twilight. The fire was covering her entire body, and all Twilight did was smile. Then the flames ate away at her muscles, and the smile faded away.

The earth mare held the dead unicorn in her hooves and screamed at the top of her lungs. She ran out of breath and looked down at the burnt corpse, her tears sizzling when they contacted the hot flesh.

She heard a growl to her left.  She turned. There was a timberwolf, dancing among the flames, watching Carrot Top with an undying hunger. Then it leaped.

Carrot Top woke in the dead of night, cold sweat dripping from her forehead. She turned her head just enough to see Twilight holding her close, hooves wrapped around her, a smile on her face.

Leaning into the warmth, a smile graced her lips and Carrot Top closed her eyes to sleep.