Platonic

by Butt

Rating: mature
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Romance, Original Character, Comedy, Big Macintosh, Human
Length: 2485

Big Macintosh is too big.

Big Macintosh loves his girlfriend. Of course, she's not a marefriend. She is, quite literally, a girl. A human female, who literally fell straight out of the sky onto the red stallion's back in a stroke of pure luck. Veronica is her name, and helping around Sweet Apple Acres is now her current occupation.

Big Mac thinks after the few months they've been together that it may be time to move to the next base...

Published 2012-11-14 14:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2012-11-14 14:00:01 UTC

Like a Truck Through a Doorway

Big Macintosh looked out on the fields, proud of another day of apple harvest. Well, he hadn't done most of the work today—his partner, Veronica, was the one tending to the trees today. She was just as stubborn as Applejack was, and insisted she take a majority of today's work to help make up for the losses the Apple family took when she first started.

Applejack had acquiesced, but only after a quick demonstration of Veronica's abilities. She couldn't buck trees like ponies could, but a rubber mallet courtesy of Filthy Rich straightened things out. The way Veronica swung the mallet onto the trees was a work of art in itself, with careful footing and measured balance vital to every part of the movement. The rubber helped prevent any real lasting damage on the trees, and the human was in no way as strong as a pony was.

The red stallion grinned as he saw the girl move into his field of vision. She had finished placing baskets around a particular tree, and jostled her own Stetson hat before taking her signature mallet and doing a quick roundabout onto the side of the tree. The steady thumping of the mallet making contact was the only sound that rung out in the idyllic farmland.

"Keep forgetting how tough it is without hooves!" Veronica laughed, wiping sweat from her brow. "What I wouldn't give for some of that earth pony strength right about now."

Veronica locked eyes with Big Mac as she walked toward him, a basket of apples in hand. Macintosh loved her eyes—smaller than a pony's, yet just as expressive, and definitely more alluring. Her sky-blue irises complemented her brown hair perfectly, and he could feel a blush coming onto his face as he kept staring. He was confident no pony could tell whether or not he actually was blushing in any situation, but Veronica had a knack for reading him.

"The apples, Mac?" Veronica stood only a few steps in front of Macintosh, who shook off his daze and took the basket in his mouth, placing it on a cart for selling. That was Applejack's duty, and she would be heading into Ponyville tomorrow to do so.

"I think that's the last of it for today, Ver. Thanks for coverin' for me." Macintosh smiled at the human, who fanned herself with her hat.

"Aw, it's nothing, Mac. I really felt bad when I first started, and Granny Smith was so nice, and the Zap apple jam was so delicious..." She sighed. "Seriously, I think I might be addicted to that stuff. Does Granny keep stashes around?"

Macintosh laughed. "Eenope. She never saves anything more than a jar fer the family. S'real popular all over Equestria, after all."

"You can say that again," Veronica giggled, jumping onto Macintosh's back. "Applejack should be finishing up today. It's her turn to tidy up the barn." She rolled over so her belly was touching Mac's back. "How about we get some 'us' time, hmm? Same spot as usual."

Macintosh pondered this as he took off his yoke, before trotting down the road to their secret place. "Eeyup."

"You remember when I first showed up, Macintosh?"

"Eeyup. Ya fell onto my back faster than Rainbow Dash during a race." He shuddered. "I still feel that impact sometimes."

"And I'm really, really sorry for that, Mac. Gosh, it was a good thing your sister was there, even though she nearly beat the snot out of me..." This time it was Veronica that shuddered. "Earth pony kicking is no joke."

"She apologized, at least. Never seen AJ jump so quickly." The day had been a blur to Macintosh, mostly. It was partly due to the fact that Veronica had collided with him on his head, and she her butt. Minimal damage to her, but Big Mac's mind was thrown for a loop for the better part of a week. He thought the doctors were all Rainbow Dash when he was carted into the hospital, and nothing scared him more than a daring pegasus attempting to correct his vision.

A pegasus that had a tendency to crash.

Veronica snuggled up to Macintosh, who laid flat on the ground. She let out a contented sigh and placed her hat on her face. "What'd I do to deserve you, Mac?"

"Same question goes for you, Ver." He nuzzled her chest, which elicited a series of giggles from her. "You're cute in your own way."

"Oh, shush, you." Veronica threw her hat at the stallion, which landed squarely on his head. "You know, I used to think you never spoke at all, except for your 'eeyup' and 'eenope'. You actually scared me half to death when you first talked to me."

"Shucks. Thought you had it in your mind like everypony else that I was a gentle giant. At least, that's what I try to be. I know sometimes I'm not the most agreeable pony."

"Aww." Veronica took his head in her hands and rubbed cheeks with him. "You'll always be a gentle giant to me, Mac. No matter what any other pony says."

"Means a lot, comin' from you." He nuzzled her chest again, relishing the sensation of her breasts. He had only seen her naked twice, but both times gave him a clear view. The spheres were strangely attractive to him, and by Celestia he loved them in all their bizarre aesthetic. It was very pronounced compared to a mare's breasts, and Macintosh often wondered how human males put up with them so flamboyantly located. Did they just stare? Or perhaps they looked away out of respect?

He dismissed the thoughts. He was no human male, and he also happened to be Veronica's coltfriend. He had been intimate with her on more than one occasion, but it had never progressed beyond cuddling... at least until today. Today, Macintosh would try to "score," as Caramel aptly put it.

"I... er, Veronica?" He nervously shifted as he turned to face his girlfriend.

"Yeah, Mac? Is something wrong?" The look she wore on her face was all too obvious to Macintosh: a tinge of confusion, with a ton of worrying. "You seem a bit different today."

"Eeeeeeeyup." He didn't even realize he was dragging out his 'eeyup', but it was a nervous tic he could never get rid of. "I was just wonderin'... if you'd like to, um... go a bit further with our relationship?"

Veronica blinked. "You... you mean... that?"

She was not making it easy on him in any way whatsoever. "Eeeeeeyup. That. If you ain't comfortable with it right now, then I won't force you to."

"I was wondering when you were going to ask." She put on a sly smile. "You think I haven't noticed you try before?"

Macintosh was mortified. He had spent so much time thinking, many minutes pacing just around the corner from her that he didn't even realize that she might have known about it. "B-b-buh—"

Veronica broke out with laughter. "Oh, Mac! You're too gullible! You should have seen the look on your face!"

"Hey, now, Ver, y'all don't have to—"

"For the record, the answer is yes." She gave a smooch to Mac's left cheek, causing him to blush again. "I love you, more than any pony around. You think I wouldn't say yes?"

"W-well, this is a pretty new thing for both of us. You sure you want to try?"

"Absolutely." Her steely gaze locked with Mac's eyes, and he sighed. She was as stubborn as Applejack, after all... must have rubbed off on her.

Veronica stood up and started disrobing, very slowly. She turned her head and smirked at him as she took off her clothes, piece by piece. Macintosh knew he should look away, but he just kept staring. A part of him could not ignore that wondrous human figure, and especially that smooth skin. Goddesses, the smooth skin. That was probably the best part of it all. It wasn't covered with a coat like ponies, and the sensation of her skin rubbing on him nearly made Mac quiver.

After several seconds of silence, the woman finished undressing, and turned around to face Macintosh with her arms covering her chest. "Still, uh, pretty shy. Hehe. I've only been in a single relationship before this, and it turned out pretty badly."

"If ya don't mind me askin', what happened?"

"We had an... argument. Things sort of went downhill from there." She jumped on Mac's back, making him freeze up from the contact. "We started arguing more everyday, sometimes about the littlest of things. Eventually, it got to the point where we couldn't stand each other anymore, so we broke up."

"I'm mighty sorry to hear that." Mac pawed at the grass in front of him.

"Well, that's enough about me, Mac." The stallion started sweating as he felt Veronica flip around on his back, her bosom squarely touching the back of his neck. "Have you ever been in a relationship before?"

"Nope. This is my first one." His felt his throat was a bit too dry for his tastes.

"Aww. You're the most attractive stallion around, and you chose me? I'm so flattered."

"Well, spendin' all the time on the farm doesn't really leave ya with a lot o' time." He snorted derisively. Granny Smith had been more than encouraging, sometimes asking Macintosh to head to town and meet a nice mare. He did as she asked, of course, but he was never really one for conversation. It made finding a mare very, very hard.

Unless the mare worked with him, of course.

"What a hard-working stallion! And so muscular, too. I can't imagine why every mare in town has their eyes on you when you walk on through." Veronica began circling Mac's cutie mark with her fingers, causing his hindleg to twitch.

"Eeyup."

"Are you feeling anything yet, Mac? Anything down there?"

Oh, he was feeling it, alright. He stood up with a start, turning his head to get a good look at his stallionhood. Surely enough, he could see it begin to emerge from its sheath. He took a breath and prayed to the Goddesses that everything would turn out well with his first time. First time in more than one aspect, really, and he hoped all of them would just smooth out.

"Ready to go?" Veronica jumped off with a push, and landed on the soft grass beneath. "Why don't you start off?"

She grabbed Mac's head with both her hands and drew him straight into her breasts. The stallion began taking deep, heavy breaths. He knew that Veronica was forward, but not this forward! Drawing in the lady's scent, he began licking the glorious breasts he so longed for, enjoying their smoothness as he ran against them with his tongue.

Veronica began to mimic Mac's breathing as she got turned on. Pony tongues were much longer and much larger than any human's, and Mac often took the opportunity to enclose his mouth on one of her breasts and suck on it. She could feel his tongue ravaging her nipples over and over, and softly moaned as Mac relented.

"Alright, Mac. Let's try it out for real, now." She laid down on the ground as a gentle breeze passed by, ruffling Mac's mane and her own hair.

Macintosh trailed her downward, bringing his member to bear. The breeze caused him to shudder a bit as his exposed bit caught some of the wind, but he looked down at his girlfriend with warm and confident eyes. Veronica had her eyes locked on a spot in between his legs, and he smirked.

"Like what ya see?"

"Mac, you're huge!"

He wasn't really one for ego boosting, but it definitely helped his confidence. "Why thank ya kindly."

"No, I mean you're huge, Mac." Veronica propped herself up on her elbows. "Your thing's probably the size of my arm!"

He raised a brow. "I guess there's... somethin' wrong?"

"Uh, yeah." Veronica got to her feet and patted herself down to shake any loose dirt off. "I'm, uh..."

Veronica bent over and exposed her own parts, and Mac understood. He should have known this was doomed from the start! Half of his brain almost screamed at him to cut and run, to get away from the newly awkward moment they had just shared. Before he could react, Veronica looked back up at him and smiled sheepishly.

"Uh, sorry, Mac. I don't think something like this is going to work out." When she saw the crestfallen look on his face, she rushed to cheer him up. "But that doesn't mean I can't still be your girlfriend! It's just that pony parts are, well, a bit too big for me."

"I understand." Mac nodded slowly, and he avoided her gaze.

"Look, Mac. I still love you very, very much." She wrapped his neck around with both arms and rubbed her cheek into his fur. "But I just can't do anything sexual with you. It'll have to remain... platonic."

"Platonic. Right." He learned that word all the way back in high school, and was surprised he still remembered.

"Yeah, really sorry." Veronica got dressed in the silence that was suddenly not so romantic.

"Mac, where ya been?" Applejack waited outside the barn as she saw the two approaching from the outskirts of the farm. "Sun's goin' down, and neither of ya are anywhere to be found! What the hay were you doin'?"

Veronica and Big Mac looked at each other for a second, and turned their gazes away.

"We'd prefer not to talk about it." Veronica walked past Applejack into the farm, leaving the stallion alone with his sister.

Applejack turned back to Big Mac as Granny Smith poked her head out of the window upstairs. "Guess it didn't turn out quite well, huh?"

Mac looked at his fetlocks. "Never thought I'd see the day where bein' too big was a bad thing."

Granny Smith clicked her tongue. "Ooh, I tried tellin' ya, my boy. They ain't the same thing we are. Problems are bound to show up, and that's mostly in the body department!"

"Granny, you know some things about this?" Applejack raised a quizzical brow as she looked up at the elderly mare.

"Let's just say I've seen many o' those relationships run into the ground. Some o' them with fightin'!" She slammed a hoof on the windowsill and pointed it at Macintosh. "Y'all are lucky she ain't got no claws!"

"Granny, we didn't get angry at each other. Things just sort of... got awkward."

"Awkward, huh?" Applejack chuckled, propping her hat back up on her head. "Reckon that's something I don't want to hear. Now get inside, the wind's pickin' up."

Macintosh trotted inside as Granny Smith greeted Veronica upstairs, a frown on his face.

Platonic. Horseapples.