"LOOK! IT'S WAVING ITS ARRAY OF FULLY ERECT HAND-PENISES!" -Doctor Klein

Name: Applejack
Sex: Female
Species: Earth Pony
Height: 4,10
Weight: 130 lbs
Mane: Blonde
Coat: Orange
Eye color: Emerald
Distinctive features: Stetson, ponytail tail, apple cutie mark
Hometown: Ponyville
Occupation: Farmer

The simple apple farmer had seen and done some very odd things. From battling the spirit of chaos to waging war with buffalo, to rescuing an immortal princess from her terrifying alter-ego.

Even with all of the crazy things under her belt, she did not expect to be a lie detector for an interview with a tall, almost completely bald alien.

"Are you sure Twilight?" Applejack asked, "I mean, I'm itchin' to meet the alien but do you really expect me to know if it's lying to us?"

"I know it's odd Applejack, but it's the best thing we've got right now." Twilight said, "Plus,you're the best pony I know when it comes to making others feel welcome... Just, don't overdose her on apple pie."

Applejack chuckled at that then motioned to the door next to them, "Alright, I guess I can try. Let's go see her."

Twilight pushed open the door and the two mares walked in. The first thing they noticed was that Rainbow Dash had beat them to the alien, whom she was already talking to.

"Courier? Isn't that, like, a job?" Rainbow Dash asked the creature on the table, who they noticed was no longer restrained to.

"That it is, not my real name, but it's a title i'm fond of." They heard the creature reply.

Next to Applejack Twilight gasped, maybe because that was the first time she heard the creature speak clearly, probably because she was alarmed that Rainbow unbounded the creature.

Rainbow looked over and saw the two standing there with their jaws loose and smiled, "Hey girls she's awake!" then Rainbow turned to 'Courier', "Courier meet Twilight and Applejack, Applejack and Twilight meet Courier!"

Twilight grinned nervously, a cold sweat breaking out on her face, "It's... nice to meet you." she said slowly.

Courier eyed her with her small, somewhat suspicious eyes, "Yeah... A pleasure." she finally said.

Applejack meanwhile put on her most award winning smile, "Howdy missy! nice to see you up and kickin'" she said as she walked, albeit slowly, towards where Courier was propped up.

Courier for her part seemed calm aside from being slightly suspicious, much to Applejack's surprise. From what she could glean from Twilight, Courier was completely delusional and freaked out when she woke up earlier. Making the amount of control she has, or is pretending she has, amazing. It made Applejack think that maybe this wasn't the first time Courier has been in a situation like this.

"May I ask where I am?" Courier asked, the suspicion never leaving her voice.

"In a moment. You'll need to answer my questions first." Twilight said with much more courage than she had.

Courier scowled for a moment before speaking again, "How about we take turns. I answer your question you answer mine. A trade." she said.

'Wow.' Applejack thought, 'This one chooses her words very carefully.'

Twilight gave Courier her own scowl before nodding, "OK. What are you?"

"Human. I'm Hispanic, but I don't think that means much to you." Courier answered, "Where am I?"

"Equestria. Ponyville to be specific. We're in a hospital." Twilight answered as she levitated a notepad and pencil from the table next to her. Courier's eyes widened for a split second before they returned to their regular suspicious gaze, but it was enough for Applejack to catch.

'Has she never seen magic before?' Applejack thought to herself.

"Where are you from?" Twilight asked.

"Planet Earth. North America. The city of New Vegas." Courier responded, "How did I get here?":

'Wow, these two sure don't waste any time.' Applejack thought silently. So far, Applejack hadn't caught onto any lies. Courier seemed solely interested in knowing the situation as well, which made Applejack think she didn't intend to come here.

Courier's question confused Twilight. Her eyes widened, "I was about to ask you the same thing."

"You didn't bring me here?"

"Unless you mean the hospital: no."

There was a pregnant pause. Twilight and Courier both looked away and seemed to be thinking, Rainbow Dash and Applejack just sat there.

"So... What do you plan to do with me?" Courier asked, caution edging into her voice once again.

"Depends." Twilight responded, "Do you come in peace?"

Applejack chuckled inwardly at that and from the look of it Rainbow was having trouble keeping a serious expression.

"I have no reason not to. " Courier said, "That is, unless you did anything to me, or plan to in the future."

For the first time since their meeting Twilight gave her an honest, warm smile, "We didn't and we won't." she said , "So in that case... Welcome to Equestria!"

Courier still looked at her neutrally until Twilight chuckled nervously and spoke again, "I ah... I still have a lot of questions for you though."

Courier looked at Twilight for a moment, then, for the first time, she smiled back.

Author's Note

HUMP DAAAAAAAY

Ok. Damn. It's been... What, a year? Year and a half? I'm so lazy. Really lazy. Sorry about that.

Good news! Football season only lasts for this week and the week after that! I'll have plenty of time to attempt to write after that!

Again, sorry. Hope you weren't waiting for anything spectacular. Or waiting at all. I know I wouldn't have.