Rest for the Weary

by A Fox in Equestria

Rating: mature
Tags: Main 6, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Sad, Other, Original Character, Comedy, Crossover
Length: 11937

The courier needs some time off.

You poor little girl... The wasteland has finally done everything to you hasn't it? You've been shot in the head, stabbed in the back, hunted like an animal, had your brain removed, and after all of that the Mohave decides to spit you out!

Hard to believe after all you did for them, the republic would just kick you out with nothing but the clothes on your back and the massive armory at your hip.

You know what I think you have earned? My broken little hero... I think someone needs a little R&R, but with your luck, well... just try to relax.

First five chapters currently being re-written.

Fallout New Vegas crossover if you haven't already guessed. I beat the game , but my save file corrupted. Here's what I think happened.

Published 2013-01-22 23:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2014-05-14 02:44:52 UTC

Prologue: A Gods Ramblings

"Contrary to popular opinion, chaos is not a bad thing. Chaos, much like harmony, is just a state of mind. It does not abide by the petty ideals of 'good and evil', no, chaos is a thing even the most benevolent of gods and the malicious of knights possess. Chaos is something to overcome... or embrace." -Starswirl the Bearded, 0995 Year of first light, Canterlot historical records.

Discord looked down at the glowing green earth. Having just been defeated on his homeworld he had acquired more time to have fun. And Discord loved having fun. Though he could hop to any reality, universe, planet, or time he desired, there was one specific place he adored. The one place where he could watch chaos rule above all else. Order could try to rise, but, ultimately, chaos would prevail.

This place was called Earth: Year 2281, Mohave wasteland.

204 years after a massive war that ravaged the earth beyond recognition, the humans who lived there still grasped onto their lives and their petty ways of fighting. They kill each other in troves over nothing, they squabble among themselves when they could be working together for the greater good, they possess the technology and knowledge to rebuild what their ancestors so foolishly destroyed, yet, they use it only to create more death.

Discord loved it.

His home planet was home to a boring race of equines that had achieved almost perfect harmony. It is a utopia that has not been ravaged by war for around a millennial. Most ponies believed in the magic of friendship and the power of love.

Discord didn't particularly care for it. Even when he brought the blessing of chaos to Equestria all they did was whine.

That was over and done with though. Now Discord had the time to visit his favorite place on the desolated planet. It was formerly known as 'Sin City', but with so many other places fitting that description as well it lost it's meaning. The actual name of this place was New Vegas, formerly Las Vegas, but that was wiped away along with most of the life on earth. Yet, as humans do, they try to preserve what they love. New Vegas is a testament to that, saved by a man who adored it too much to see it destroyed.

Discord made his way through the irradiated ozone and down to the correct continent. Finding the correct spot, flew down to the barren patch of desert. Seeing the light he wanted off in the distance he saved himself the monotony of floating by teleporting to the entrance.

Something's wrong.

It was the same jagged metal walls surrounding the city, same protectrons doing their job, but something didn't sit right with Discord. He floated over the walls and into the city. He expected to see the normal group of gamblers, hookers, and millitary police, but what he saw confused him.

There were rows upon rows of NCR soldiers lining the streets. They seemed to be recovering from a huge battle, 'But didn't the battle of the dam end already?' Discord thought 'She had just pushed back the Legion last time I checked...'

Discord flew down and walked among the soldiers. None of them could interact with him in this form, they didn't believe in gods, 'Perhaps I could get answers from one of them.' he thought as he saw a group of flustered citizens standing next to one of the wounded tents.

Discord moved over to one of the citizens and leaned in so he could hear.

"...just broke into the 38 with a group of rangers..." one said

"I heard she tried to reason with 'em..." another said

"That sounds like her. Still, it don't matter now," a last one said "whether she tried to talk or not she had to kill her way out."

"Why'd they do it?" the first one asked "I never heard of her doing nothing besides helping them."

"She wiped out the legion almost single handedly," the second one said, "I think... The NCR... They're scared of her."

Discord had heard enough to piece together what had happened 'So,' he thought 'the mighty Courier has been double crossed. I wonder what she's doing now.'

Then it occurred to the god that he was, in fact, a god.

"I'll just find out!" he mused.

With a snap of a claw and a flash of light, he found his favorite source of entertainment.

The courier was curled into the fetal position in the middle of the desert.

"Well... that was a let-down." Discord said, slightly disappointed.

She was either asleep or unconscious. Unconscious seemed more likely, or possibly dead. She had multiple holes in her back, but no blood flowed from them (that's a good sign, right?). Discord saw the light rise and fall of her chest and was satisfied. She was alive, she would be up and kickin' (ass) in no time.

Yet, something bothered the mad god. Every other time he was around the courier she was full of energy and trying to fight the good fight. Granted, she was passed out at the moment, but there was always that aura around her. Even while sleeping, Discord knew something was not right with his little Courier.

'Could she have?... No, that's impossible, she's been through much more than this. She couldn't possibly have...'

Discords thoughts came to a halt as a tear made it's way down the girls face.

'given up...' Discords thought completed.

That was it. That was the push over the edge, the last straw, the final kick to this young woman's hope.

The hero of the mohave is broken.

Though Discord despised how she stood for order and peace, the Courier had caused enough chaos along the way to earn his respect - no- his admiration, and make the end factor of her efforts null and void. Discord would not let this little human that he had come to adore so much lose her fighting spirit.

Something had to be done. She needed something to take her mind off this betrayal, not to mention her terrible, terrible life.

"AHA!" Discord exclaimed as he neared the motionless body before him. He inhaled deeply and let a soft light slowly envelop the woman. "I hope this works!"

In a flash of light, the Courier disappeared.

Discord wiped his claws together in satisfaction, "Never let it be said Discord didn't care for his citizens..."

Perk acquired!: Thought You Died

Ch. 1: An Unusual Assignment

"Time and time again I see good ponies put in bad places. Some succumb to the tyranny of hate and brutality, while others just fade into the background. Yet, every once in a while one of them will rise up and put their hoof down. But these heroes... these are the ones who suffer the most." -Princess Celestia Ruler of Equestra, Address following The Battle of Four Nights, Royal Canterlot Archives

In the land of Equestria there are many towns and cities. There's Fillydelphia, Las Pegasus, Trottingham, Appleoosa, and the great capital; Canterlot. By comparison, the rustic town of Ponyville is small and meek. It's only claim to fame being it's rigid traditions and it's foolishly close proximity to the Everfree forest. But if one were to look close enough, they would find that this seemingly normal town is home to some of the most powerful ponies in the entire country. The ponies, known as The Bearers, have saved the world twice.

The leader of these ponies is known as Twilight Sparkle. She is a unicorn under the apprenticeship of the ruler of the kingdom, but she is currently charged with studying the magic of friendship. She and the Princess exchange letters by means of dragonbreath. Twilight will send friendship reports, the princess will receive them and give her response.

But today Twilight received a letter from the princess that was not a response to a friendship report. This letter was a mission.

Dear Twilight

I am aware this is not the usual time for our exchange and I assure you are not in any trouble. As I am sure you know by now there is strange weather above the everfree forest. Normally this would not concern me; however, Luna and I have felt a strong surge of chaotic energy during the latest storm. Discord is still in his stone state but that does not mean he is unable to act. So Twilight, I need you and your friends to enter the everfree locate the source of the energy, and if what you find is potentailly threatening to equestria, bring it with you to Canterlot upon your return.

The fate of Equestria may rest on you and your friends yet again.

-Celestia

Twilight put the scroll down and yelled for Spike.

"Alright girls, we have a lot to do today!" Twilight said as she smiled at her friends, "As you all know, there has been strange weather above this everfree for quite some time now. But just this morning I received a letter from the princess telling me that there was a large surge of chaotic magic. That's the same kind that Discord uses. Now don't worry, he's still locked up, but Celestia wants us to find the source of the energy and retrieve it. Any questions?"

Spike raised his claw.

"No Spike, you can't come."

Spike put his claw down and walked out of the room without a word.

Twilight blinked, "Well, that was odd." she said. Twilight looked around the room to her assorted friends. Rainbow Dash had a confident smirk as she hovered in the middle of the room, Pinkie Pie was bouncing up and down on a exercise ball she had somehow procured, Applejack was by Twilight's side looking expectant, and Rarity was polishing her hooves as she waited.

"Wait, where's Fluttershy?" Twilight asked.

Rainbow Dash's ears pricked up, "I thought you sent her somewhere." she said.

"Why would you think that?"

"Well, she wasn't at her cottage so I thought she left before me. Then she wasn't here so I assumed you sent her to do something."

Twilight's scrunched up her brow, "She was never here. are you sure she wasn't home?"

Rainbow nodded.

"OH, OH, What if she went in the everfree by herself?" Pinkie asked while she bounced.

Rarity gasped, "Oh no! Poor Fluttershy's trapped in the everfree with all of those terrible creatures! Not to mention all the mud!" she visibly shivered.

"Now hold on everypony," Applejack spoke up, "Ah'm sure there's a simple reason Fluttershy wasn't home. She could have been out gettin' food for her animal friends. Heck, she could be back at her cottage right now!"

"Applejack's right," Twilight soothed her friends, "she was probably just out for a bit. Let's just visit her cottage before we head into the everfree."

All the ponies in the room looked satisfied.

"OK ladies, let's go!"

The five ponies approached the small cottage on the outskirts of the forest. The gravel crunched under their hooves as they made their way up the path. The building was dark, but the chirping of birds and other various creatures could be heard from the outside. Twilight approached the door and knocked lightly. After a few moments the door to the cottage swung open revealing a small white rabbit.

Twilight turned to her friends, "Hey, it's Angel!" she turned back to the bunny in the doorway, "Is Fluttershy here?"

The bunny shook his head.

"Do you know where she is?" she asked the bunny.

The bunny nodded.

"Can you tell us?"

The bunny shook his head.

Twilight's ears drooped, "Why?"

Angel bunny silently snickered as he slammed the door in the unicorns face, causing her to fall onto her haunches.

Twilight sat there rubbing her nose for a moment before getting up. When she was satisfied it wasn't broken from the force of a bunny slamming a door, she faced her giggling friends with her slightly bruised dignity, "Well, just look around everypony. Maybe there's some clues." Twilight ordered.

The assorted ponies searched the land surrounding the cottage. The sun was disappearing behind the horizon when somepony spoke up, "Gals! Look at this!" Pinkie exclaimed while she looked intently at the ground near Fluttershy's garden.

"Hoofprints!" Applejack exclaimed as they neared the spot Pinkie was licking for reasons unknown, "And they're headin' right into..."

"The everfree forest!"

Ch. 2: The Mysterious Stranger

"I guess that's just what you and I are. We're just a couple of problem-solvers." -Boone

The ponies all followed the tracks without hesitation. Their first priority had changed without use of tongue: Fluttershy first, then the mission. Nopony should venture into the everfree by themselves, let alone at night. So why would Fluttershy go off without telling any of them?

This is exactly what they discussed while following her hoofsteps.

"I just don't know why she would do something like this!" Rainbow Dash exploded, "What was she thinking?"

"Maybe one of her animal friends ran away! OH, maybe she was on a rescue mission!" Pinkie Pie seemed ecstatic despite the situation.

"Well it doesn't matter, if we keep following the tracks we should find h- the tracks are gone." Twilight ended abruptly.

"She must have started to fly, but Fluttershy doesn't fly unless she has to. What could have happened?" Rainbow Dash looked pleadingly at Twilight.

Twilight was calm and collected when she spoke, "I don't know. But sitting here isn't going to find her." Just then Twilight spotted a opening in the leaves, "Rainbow, check that hole in the canopy, maybe Fluttershy wanted to see where she was. Or better yet, she's just flying around up there."

Rainbow Dash saluted her and took to the skies.

"So what was up there RD?" Applejack asked as Rainbow Dash touched down.

She scratched the back of her head, "Well not Fluttershy. It's getting really dark out, but when I looked in the direction her hoofprints were heading I saw something weird," Rainbow tapped her hoof to her chin, "There was a faint light in the direction the prints lead, and it looked like it was... I don't know... Steaming."

Twilight perked up at this, "Whatever you saw could be the thing princess Celestia sensed!"

"And Fluttershy is already there!" Squealed Rarity.

"C'mon everypony! Let's go find Fluttershy!" Applejack cheered.

"Yeah!" They all cheered.

Applejack took the lead as the five ponies raced through the thick foliage. Their hooves crushed the grass under their feet as they raced to reach the source of the now barely visible light. Thousands of scenarios played through Twilight's mind as she galloped. 'Where is Fluttershy?' and 'What's that light?' were among the most prominent thoughts swirling around as they neared their destination.

As they cleared through a last particularly thick layer of brush Rarity stopped immediately, "What in the name of Luna is that?"

They trotted up on a barren patch of land. The dirt and rock seemed scorched by some unknown blast, and there were charred poles protruding from the ground that they could only assume were trees. The area seemed to radiate some ominous heat that distorted the trees behind it.

Applejack showed no sign of stopping as she trotted toward the blast zone, but without her permission she was lifted in a purple aura and levitated back to the group.

"What the hay Twilight?" Applejack complained as Twilight set her down.

"That area has high amounts of magical residue coating it," she explained, "if you went in there without some sort of protective suit, the odds of you getting extremely sick are high."

"But Twi, didn't you just use your magic to levitate me?" Applejack asked with a flat expression.

"This is different. This magic is so powerful it could hurt the princesses. My levitation spell has barely a fraction of that power. Besides, i'm almost certain this is what the princesses sensed."

"But there's nothing in there Twi," Rainbow Dash said, "Why would Discord just blast a random part of the everfree with mag-"

Rainbow's words were cut off by Pinkie Pie, "Girls! I found some more prints... but you're not gonna like where they're heading." Pinkie Pie sounded extremely nervous.

The assorted ponies walked over to see Pinkie with a nervous smile forced onto her face. She pointed a hoof at a set of prints starting in the middle of the field and continuing into the blast zone.

Twilight processed what the tracks meant in an instant, then she started hopping from hoof to hoof, "Nonononononononononononononono! This can't be happening! Fluttershy is a smart pony. She would probably stay away from the scary smokey crater in the everfree unless... unless..."

"Something was in trouble." Rarity finished for her.

"Everypony spread out! Look for Fluttershy and any tracks going out of there." Twilight said in an authoritative voice that they did not hear often

"Right!" All of her friends yelled as they ran in separate directions around the blast radius.

It was a good minute before Twilight heard Applejack yell. It was a big blast radius, If Fluttershy went in there and tried to carry something out with her she wouldn't be feeling good for a long time. Twilight rushed over to Applejack. Applejack gave her a scared look and pointed at tracks leading back into the forest. The tracks were deeper than the previous set, and they seemed to be staggered, like Fluttershy was off balance. On an unspoken order both ponies charged into the foliage, determined to find their friend.

They didn't have to look very far. After they re-entered the forest they came upon two unconscious forms next to a large oak tree. One was easily identified as Fluttershy which Applejack rushed up to try to wake up. The other was something Twilight had never seen before.

Sprawled out behind Fluttershy was a long, skinny figure. The way it was positioned confirmed Twilight's suspicion; Fluttershy had carried this thing out of the extremely toxic area. Along with being tall, the creature was covered in clothes and metallic objects. It had very little hair, but what was visible was only on it's head and is bleach-white. The areas not covered by hair or the strange clothes had tanned skin. The creatures face was soft and round with high cheekbones and a pointed chin.

Of course this was all speculation. For all she knew, she could be staring straight at the creatures genitals.

"Twi! Help me out here! Fluttershy's not waking up!" Applejack yelled.

This broke Twilight out of her possibly suggestive analysis of the creature and turned her attention to Fluttershy. She was breathing normally, but when Twilight put a hoof to her forehead it almost burned her.

"She's burning up, we need to get her to the hospital." Twilight told Applejack.

"Well hurry up and teleport us Twi!" Applejack screamed.

"I can't make that kind of jump, and even if I could we shouldn't let either of them come in contact with more magic. It could make it worse!"

"Did you find her?" Applejack and Twilight heard their friends come bounding towards them, "How is she, and what is that?" Rainbow asked.

"Fluttershy's sick, and that's the thing you're carrying back to ponyville." Twilight answered in a hurry, "Now help me flip it ov- oh, oh Celestia..."

Twilight had flipped the creature onto its front with all of her strength. Once it was laying flat Twilight noticed the holes in the clothing. They peppered the creatures back, and each hole had it's own distinct ring of dry blood. Twilight fell backwards in shock.

"Twi, magic doesn't do that right?" Rainbow Dash asked cautiously.

Twilight sat staring for a few more seconds before regaining control of herself, "No, but we still need to get them to the hospital. Applejack get Fluttershy. Rainbow, Pinkie, pick it-" she motioned to the creature "-up. We need to go."

Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie looked hesitant, but picked up the creature nonetheless. Twilight looked to Applejack who had Fluttershy straddling her back. Once Twilight made sure all her friends were ready to move they set out towards Ponyville.

Twilight heard something. She didn't know what it was, but it cut through the thick silence like a knife. She couldn't quite place the noise, it sounded distant, but something about it felt familiar. They had been walking for close to an hour and so far had no interruptions, but like every one of their adventures there was always some sort of twist. And here in the everfree a twist could mean getting turned into stone, she knew from experience.

Awooooooooooooooooooooo!

Well, so much for a peaceful walk through the forest.

The low crunching noise of timberwolves joints grinding was made clear. Brush in the distance rustled, and then exploded as three of the wolves burst out.

"Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, put them over by that tree. We need to keep them safe." Twilight told them

Applejack and Rainbow Dash returned to Twilight's side. They cast wary glances at the eight or so timberwolves that accumulated in front of her. Twilight looked back to see Rarity and Pinkie Pie flanking them on either side. The creature that Twilight was starting to resent for causing all this trouble leaned motionless against a tree next to Fluttershy.

All in all, it was turning out to be a pretty crappy night.

One of the Timberwolves tried a lunge a Twilight. It was rewarded for it's bravery with a swipe of magic that sent it flying back to it's compatriots. The second Timberwolf ran at the hovering blue pegasus, but failed to notice the two-ton cannon-of-fun pointed right at it. With an explosion of confetti and love, the second timberwolf was shot back into his group. Slightly dazed, the wolf got back to his paws without a scratch on him.

'This isn't going to work! We need to get Fluttershy out of here! I could probably tell Applejack to run off with her, that might work. I'm just glad they aren't smart enough to attack at the same time. Twilight thought.

As if they could read her mind, the wolves all backed up as one.

"Get ready!" Twilight warned her friends who exchanged nervous glances.

Time seemed to slow down as the timberwolves charged. Their wooden paws scratching the ground slowly, their snarls as they eyed their next meal, her friends hearts hammering in their chests, the sound of their scared screaming as their lives flashed before their eyes... then, another sound. One of shuffling. It did not come from the wolves in front of them, nor did it come from her friends. The sound came from behind her. Twilight had no time to ponder what the sound was though, because she watched in slow motion as the timberwoles tried to halt abruptly and ended up tumbling over eachother in a rather comical manner.

As she returned to real time, Twilight saw menacing timberwolves back away slowly, tails between their legs, as if some thing were scolding them like a normal pet dog.

Twilight's mind processed it slower than she would have liked, but then she came to a conclusion.

She wheeled around in joy, "Flutters-"

The words shriveled up and died in her mouth, because standing in front of her grasping it's chest and standing on two legs, was the strange creature.

The timberwolves backed away as if Fluttershy were using 'The Stare' on them. The creature took slow, pained step away from the line that Twilight and her friends had set up. Twilight looked back at the timberwolves, they shook and whined softly as the creature behind her moved. When the shuffling of the creature stopped, so did the timberwolves. There was a brief silence before the pack turned tail and ran. All of the timberwolves scrambled around eachother to get away from the creature, well, all except one. The timberwolf that stood it's ground was much larger than it's bretheren. It's wooden skin was carved up as if it had seen many fights. It stood completely still, somehow pushing through whatever the creature did to it's pack.

Twilight turned back to the creature only to see it fumbling with some sort of syringe. When the creature held it firmly in the little things at the end of it's foreleg it jabbed the needle straight into it's abdomen. It' pushed down releasing whatever liquid the vial contained into it's bloodstream. The creature let out what Twilight interpreted as a happy groan before in fell to rest on one leg.

"AHHHH!"

Twilight turned back just in time to see the timberwolf rush at Rarity. It showed amazing speed and agility as it expertly dodged Applejack's hind legs and continued on to pounce on the unicorn. It pinned her forelegs down with it's paws and snarled in her face. Rarity couldn't move under the weight of the timberwolf and Applejack was still getting back to her hooves. Then Twilight watched as two figures tackled the timberwolf off of Rarity's petrified figure. One left a multicolored trail as it collided with the wolf then proceeded to fly into the air. The other figure was the creature, who tumbled onto the ground still latched onto the wolf.

As the timberwolf slid across the grass the creature rolled back onto two legs. It rushed at the wolf that was getting back up. The creature grabbed the wolf by it's wooden tail and used it's momentum to throw it at a distant tree. It hit the tree with a low thump, but got up and into an attack stance. More than anything, the wolf only seemed mad.

The creature reached into it's clothes and pulled out a sword. It was much different from the kind the saw some of the royal guards use. It was short for a sword , extremely thick, and the blade seemed to be curved forward. The creature crouched and held the sword at it's side, then it stopped moving. Completely. The creature locked eyes with the timberwolf and they engaged in a deadly staring contest.

The wolf broke first. It charged at the armed creature with frightening speed while the creature remained motionless. However, as the timberwolf neared it's supposed prey a few things happened in succession. The wolf jumped through the air eager to get it's next meal, the creature rushed forward at an insane speed for something it's size and brought it's sword across the wolfs side. The wolf yelped in pain, but nonetheless returned to it's stance to start fighting again.

The creature with the blade simply turned around to face the wolf again, but this time it made the first move. It ran forward and brought it's blade down in a wide arc. The wolf easily dodged it, but did not foresee the long leg kicking it in the jaw. The wolf stumbled back and the creature (which the gathered ponies were cheering for by then) flipped back into a standing position.

The wolf decided to make a last ditch effort. It ran at the creature with the last of it's energy and swiped a wooden claw at it's foe. The sword easily blocked it, but did not stop the set of razor sharp wooden teeth that went for the leg. The creature let out a high pitched scream of pain as the teeth sung into it's leg. It dropped it's sword and grabbed the timberwolf by it's mouth. The creature pulled its jaw off its leg then grasp the wooden wolf by the neck. There was the sound of wood splintering. Then the wolf fell to the ground dead.

Twilight watched in fascinated horror as the creature retrieved it's sword and returned it to its sheath and pushed itself back onto its legs. The creature shouldn't even be breathing! It's absorbed insane amounts of magic, apparently beaten senseless by whatever put the holes in it's back, and gotten bitten by one of the most fearsome creatures in the everfree!

It turned towards Twilight and her friends.

Twilight needed answers, but for now she only asked what all the ponies present wanted to know, "What are you?"

The creature looked blankly at them for a few seconds, 'Wait, it probably doesn't even speak equestrian!' Twilight thought.

"Talking horses... Can't say I expected that."

Twilight stopped mentally berating herself long enough to see the creature fall to the ground unconscious.

Ch. 3: Bedridden

"There's a time and place for everything. So, on account of how fucked up this occasion seems to be, I would like some vodka and a shot of jet." -Legend of the Lone Wanderer, Brotherhood of Steel east coast chapter, Citadel archives

Rainbow Dash had been sitting by Fluttershy's side for most of the operation. It would have been a more serious affair had the operation to remove the 'magical residue' didn't consist of a unicorn soaking up some of the residue, then letting their horn send off a display of fantastic colors. She tried not to giggle, Fluttershy was in pain after all, but the look on the nurses faces as the light show went on was just too funny. Rainbow Dash decided it would be better for the nurses morale if she left the room.

Walking down the hall from Fluttershy's operating room she concerned herself with other things. Dash started to hover in the direction she thought she saw them take the thing. She didn't know what to call it yet, but it spoke equestrian for some reason, so once it woke up that wouldn't be a problem.

Thinking about the creature Dash let her mind wander: She didn't know what to think about it yet. It had been the main reason they were in the hospital now! It had appeared in that freak storm with all of the chaos stuff, then Fluttershy got herself hurt trying to help it. But something told Dash it wasn't bad. If it had wanted to hurt any of them it could have just done it while they were distracted by the timberwolves.

Rainbow Dash shivered.

It had scared all those beasts away by looking at them. Then it went and saved Rarity by killing the big one with a sword and it's arm-things. It threw itself at the wolves when it easily could have let them eat us.

What angle was thing playing?

Dash saw Twilight down the hallway. She seemed distant, 'Probably thinking exactly what i'm thinking.' Dash told herself.

"Is it in there?" Rainbow Dash asked. Twilight looked up and Dash nodded to the door she stood in front of.

Twilight nodded wordlessly as she muttered to herself.

She had been like this ever since the fight. Her mind must have been in overdrive the entire walk back to Ponyville. Rainbow Dash chuckled to herself thinking about what could be going on in that mind of hers. Heck, she had went back in time to tell herself to relax because she was being to paranoid (then ended up being more paranoid because of it).

"Whatya thinkin' 'bout Twilight?" Rainbow Dash asked trying to sound like Pinkie Pie.

"It." She said simply.

"Care to elaborate?" Rainbow Dash made a mental note to stop spending so much time in the library, it was starting to get to her.

Twilight looked up. She looked like she was back in Equestria as she answered Dash's question, "Well... I sent the princess a letter telling her everything that happened. She said it was dangerous, but she wants me to see if it's a threat."

"So?"

"So!?" Twilight said with a new-found fury, "The ruler of Equestria is counting on me to see if an alien that killed a timberwolf with its bare hands is a threat!"

"Hands?" Rainbow Dash asked slightly perplexed.

"They're exactly like what Spike has, so that's what i'm calling them. BUT YOU'RE MISSING THE POINT!" Twilight screamed, "What if I mess up!?"

Rainbow Dash was about to tell Twilight she needed to calm down when they heard a commotion from behind the door. They heard lots of loud screaming, and the sound of nurses running about. Twilight and Rainbow Dash exchanged nervous glances before they pushed the door open, determined to fixed whatever was going on.

"Let me go you sick freaks! What the fuck did you do to me!?"

The creature that saved them, minus all the strange clothing except for a strange metal thing on its foreleg, was bound to the hospital bed. It pulled at the bindings and screamed at the doctors and nurses. It's slender form warped and bent as it put everything it had into getting off the bed. It had a blindfold on, Rainbow Dash didn't know why, but she could tell the thing hated it.

One of the doctors tried to soothe the flailing creature from the side of the bed, "Shhh, we're trying to help. Please stop moving you could make it worse."

This only seemed to make the creature convulse more. It pulled, kicked, and lashed out with angry, unreadable screams.

Rainbow Dash isn't a doctor, she doesn't even know what the creature a few feet in front of her is, but she made up her mind.

"Take off the blindfold." Rainbow Dash commanded.

"What?!" The doctors asked incredulously.

"You heard me. It's scared, just let it see us, we might be able to calm it down." Rainbow Dash tried to reason.

"We can't. We have no Idea what it's reaction would be-"

"For the love of Celestia just take off the blindfold!" Twilight yelled from behind Rainbow.

The doctor looked at Celestias personal student for a moment, then back to the now still and listening creature, then against his better judgement pulled the blindfold loose with his teeth.

It flinched as the light assaulted it's eyes. It blinked a few times to adjust to the light, then it looked around. It scanned the room with a blank stare, all previous notions of anger or fear wiped from its face. It caught sight of Rainbow Dash, and its gaze stayed there.

Rainbow Dash took this as a sign she could come closer. She slowly clicked across the marble floor to the bedside. It was at that time Rainbow Dash got to actually see the creature without being in a hurry or in the dead of night.

It would be taller than any pony in the room if it stood of its legs like it did in the fight. The legs it stood on ended in small pads with little stubs coming off the end. The legs were toned with tanned skin and muscle that had stopped rippling against the bindings. Rainbow moved her way up, then up some more as she confirmed it was female, and made her way to the creatures abdomen. Much like the rest of its body it was toned and muscular, not a trace of fat anywhere, almost like the creature only ate what it could burn. She kept moving up, taking note of the 'hands' as Twilight called them and then finally made it to her face.

Then something clicked in her brain.

Rainbow Dashs eyes shot back down to the body. She had idly looked at it before, only acknowledging the creatures muscle and physique, but now she saw it under a whole new light.

There were scars everywhere.

They ran up, down, left, right, and diagonal across the creature. Some of the scars were merely large holes that looked like they had just sat there until they healed, leaving the skin a much lighter color. It looked like somepony played a sick game of connect the dots on her body, lost, then kept wanting a rematch.

Rainbow turned her gaze back to the creatures face. It's mouth was opened slightly in a childlike manner, and its eyes were wide in curiosity, "So many colors..." it said with a soft voice.

Rainbow Dash tried to think of a response to that, but was cut off when the creature coughed blood onto the table and passed out a second time.

Ch. 4: Waking up, Freaking out

"ARE THOSE... PENISES I SEE WRIGGLING AROUND ON ITS FEET? DISGUSTING." -Doctor Klein

Rainbow Dash sat in a chair across from the unconscious creature. They probed and prodded inside the surgical incisions they made while nurses removed the excess magic like they did with Fluttershy. The doctors pulled out multiple pieces of metal from the creature with their hooves, but when they pulled out a metal nail, Twilight left the room.

The creature woke up a few times, but she didn't seem to comprehend what was going on. The first time she woke up she started singing. It was mostly jibberish, and she never stayed on one song too long, but at least she wasn't kicking and screaming. The second time she woke up she giggled, like the tweezers pulling random bits of metal out of her tickled.

Rainbow Dash watched the entire time thinking, 'What is she? Where did she come from? Is she here to hurt us? Why does she have so many scars?'

Finally, the doctors started sewing up the wound. Rainbow Dash asked them why they were doing it with their hooves and teeth and they informed her that the creature, as well as Fluttershy, could not be exposed to any more magic for a couple of weeks. Once they finished sewing her up, the doctors washed up and left the room to look at their data.

"Why did they leave?" Rainbow Dash asked the remaining nurse, "Shouldn't they, you know, give her some medicine?"

The nurse shook her head, "We don't know what effect our medicine could have on it."

"But she" Dash motioned toward the giggling creature and putting emphasis on the word she, "Is probably in pain!"

The nurse had a blank expression, "Fine. She has thirteen unusual wounds going all the way through her body, as well as a numerous fractured bones. She's lost huge amounts of blood that we have no replacement for, and she had a large amount of timberwolf venom injected into her system via the massive bite on her leg. The mere fact that she is breathing has thrown every single doctor here through a loop. So, sure, let's just pump some of our medicine into her on the assumption that that can't kill her too."

That shut Rainbow Dash up for a while. She went back to her chair and decided to take a nap.

"Oh... My head..."

Rainbow Dash was roused from her sleep by a voice in front of her. She opened her eyes to see the creature stretching out its neck. She rolled her neck around making a loud popping sound as it did so. Then she yawned and opened her eyes. She looked down at the bindings with a calm gaze pulling on them slightly to test their strength, completely unaware of Rainbow Dash's presence.

Rainbow Dash coughed to get her attention.

The creatures head shot around. Its small hazel eyes seemed to study everything about Rainbow in a mere second.

"So, uhhh, how do you feel?" Rainbow Dash asked slightly jarred under the creatures predatory gaze.

The creature studied her a moment longer before letting a bemused grin split her face. She giggled quietly for a few seconds before bursting into full-on laughter. It wasn't a normal type of laughter, nor did it sound evil like Nightmare Moon or any of Rainbow's past foes. This laughter sounded painful.

The creature slammed her head back on the operating table. Hard. She seemed to be talking to herself whenever her laughter halted for a moment, but it was too quiet to hear.

Her laughter cut off abruptly as the creature took a long breath and looked up at the ceiling. The room was quiet without the echos of her guffaws bouncing around, making it possible for Rainbow Dash to hear the quiet whisper of the creature, "Go to therapy they said. It'll help they said. You won't end up strapped to a table in a room with a talking horse..."

Rainbow Dash was at a loss for words. She moved her jaw, but no words would come out.

"So I wonder what chems I'm on right now?" The creature seemed to be talking to herself again, "Maybe buffout and psycho? Or maybe I made some more slasher then drowned myself in vodka. What do you think?"

Rainbow Dash could only form one complete thought, "I'm a pony. Not a horse." she said.

The creature rolled her eyes, "So what are you gonna do with me? I can think of a few things, but I wouldn't want to give you ideas now would I? But a fair warning, if you plan on replacing any body parts someone already beat you to it."

Rainbow Dashs brain function seemed to come back partially, "The doctors healed you. Sewed up the holes and removed all that metal. They also removed all the magic from your system. They saved you."

The creature chuckled to herself again, "Magic? Ohhh... Now I know what happened. I overdosed on jet, read some Tales of Chivalry, then passed out in my suite!" She snorted, "You'd think I'd learned that lesson the first time."

She was making no sense. Rainbow Dash didn't understand most of what the creature was babbling about, but Rainbow had gathered that she didn't think this was actually happening.

"Look! I can promise you that this is completely real!" Rainbow Dash told her.

The creature merely raised an eyebrow.

Rainbow Dash grumbled to herself as she walked over to a trashcan in the corner of the room. She reached into it, careful to not touch the blood, pulled out the torn up outfit. She held the ragged piece of clothing in her hoof for a bit before she spoke, "This is what you were wearing when we found you," she put the clothes back in the trash, "do you believe me now?"

The creature stayed silent for a moment, she seemed to be thinking, then she spoke.

"My names Courier... It's nice to meet you."

Ch. 5: Interroga- I mean Interview

"LOOK! IT'S WAVING ITS ARRAY OF FULLY ERECT HAND-PENISES!" -Doctor Klein

Name: Applejack
Sex: Female
Species: Earth Pony
Height: 4,10
Weight: 130 lbs
Mane: Blonde
Coat: Orange
Eye color: Emerald
Distinctive features: Stetson, ponytail tail, apple cutie mark
Hometown: Ponyville
Occupation: Farmer

The simple apple farmer had seen and done some very odd things. From battling the spirit of chaos to waging war with buffalo, to rescuing an immortal princess from her terrifying alter-ego.

Even with all of the crazy things under her belt, she did not expect to be a lie detector for an interview with a tall, almost completely bald alien.

"Are you sure Twilight?" Applejack asked, "I mean, I'm itchin' to meet the alien but do you really expect me to know if it's lying to us?"

"I know it's odd Applejack, but it's the best thing we've got right now." Twilight said, "Plus,you're the best pony I know when it comes to making others feel welcome... Just, don't overdose her on apple pie."

Applejack chuckled at that then motioned to the door next to them, "Alright, I guess I can try. Let's go see her."

Twilight pushed open the door and the two mares walked in. The first thing they noticed was that Rainbow Dash had beat them to the alien, whom she was already talking to.

"Courier? Isn't that, like, a job?" Rainbow Dash asked the creature on the table, who they noticed was no longer restrained to.

"That it is, not my real name, but it's a title i'm fond of." They heard the creature reply.

Next to Applejack Twilight gasped, maybe because that was the first time she heard the creature speak clearly, probably because she was alarmed that Rainbow unbounded the creature.

Rainbow looked over and saw the two standing there with their jaws loose and smiled, "Hey girls she's awake!" then Rainbow turned to 'Courier', "Courier meet Twilight and Applejack, Applejack and Twilight meet Courier!"

Twilight grinned nervously, a cold sweat breaking out on her face, "It's... nice to meet you." she said slowly.

Courier eyed her with her small, somewhat suspicious eyes, "Yeah... A pleasure." she finally said.

Applejack meanwhile put on her most award winning smile, "Howdy missy! nice to see you up and kickin'" she said as she walked, albeit slowly, towards where Courier was propped up.

Courier for her part seemed calm aside from being slightly suspicious, much to Applejack's surprise. From what she could glean from Twilight, Courier was completely delusional and freaked out when she woke up earlier. Making the amount of control she has, or is pretending she has, amazing. It made Applejack think that maybe this wasn't the first time Courier has been in a situation like this.

"May I ask where I am?" Courier asked, the suspicion never leaving her voice.

"In a moment. You'll need to answer my questions first." Twilight said with much more courage than she had.

Courier scowled for a moment before speaking again, "How about we take turns. I answer your question you answer mine. A trade." she said.

'Wow.' Applejack thought, 'This one chooses her words very carefully.'

Twilight gave Courier her own scowl before nodding, "OK. What are you?"

"Human. I'm Hispanic, but I don't think that means much to you." Courier answered, "Where am I?"

"Equestria. Ponyville to be specific. We're in a hospital." Twilight answered as she levitated a notepad and pencil from the table next to her. Courier's eyes widened for a split second before they returned to their regular suspicious gaze, but it was enough for Applejack to catch.

'Has she never seen magic before?' Applejack thought to herself.

"Where are you from?" Twilight asked.

"Planet Earth. North America. The city of New Vegas." Courier responded, "How did I get here?":

'Wow, these two sure don't waste any time.' Applejack thought silently. So far, Applejack hadn't caught onto any lies. Courier seemed solely interested in knowing the situation as well, which made Applejack think she didn't intend to come here.

Courier's question confused Twilight. Her eyes widened, "I was about to ask you the same thing."

"You didn't bring me here?"

"Unless you mean the hospital: no."

There was a pregnant pause. Twilight and Courier both looked away and seemed to be thinking, Rainbow Dash and Applejack just sat there.

"So... What do you plan to do with me?" Courier asked, caution edging into her voice once again.

"Depends." Twilight responded, "Do you come in peace?"

Applejack chuckled inwardly at that and from the look of it Rainbow was having trouble keeping a serious expression.

"I have no reason not to. " Courier said, "That is, unless you did anything to me, or plan to in the future."

For the first time since their meeting Twilight gave her an honest, warm smile, "We didn't and we won't." she said , "So in that case... Welcome to Equestria!"

Courier still looked at her neutrally until Twilight chuckled nervously and spoke again, "I ah... I still have a lot of questions for you though."

Courier looked at Twilight for a moment, then, for the first time, she smiled back.

Author's Note

HUMP DAAAAAAAY

Ok. Damn. It's been... What, a year? Year and a half? I'm so lazy. Really lazy. Sorry about that.

Good news! Football season only lasts for this week and the week after that! I'll have plenty of time to attempt to write after that!

Again, sorry. Hope you weren't waiting for anything spectacular. Or waiting at all. I know I wouldn't have.

Chapter 6: What ARE You?

"I am the bringer of death! Fall to your knees and beg for mercy... Or give me a sandwich. I'm pretty hungry." - The Vault Dweller

Against the nurses wishes, Courier gingerly eased herself off of the operating table and slowly made her way over to the trashcan. Applejack watched as the human reached down and pulled the tattered clothes it had been wearing out from the bin.

"It's ruined. You're not seriously considering wearing that, are you?" Twilight asked, "It's covered in your... blood."

Courier simply tossed it onto the operating table and looked around the room, "It's fine. A few patches and it'll be as good as new. Where's the rest of my stuff? Please tell me you didn't throw it away too."

Twilight walked over to a large metal trunk in the corner of the room labeled 'BIO-HAZARD', "Right in here, Miss Courier!"

Courier nodded and strode over to the trunk, and with a display Applejack would not have expected of someone recovering from such wounds, picked up the entire crate, hauled it over to the operating table, and put it down on the ground. She then opened it up and proceeded to rifle through it.

"I can talk while I work. If i'm not mistaken, it was your turn to ask a question." Courier said, her voice muffled by the trunk.

Twilight, for her part, was still trying to regain control of her faculties after watching the display of raw power, "How... You're still recovering, how did you do that?"

Courier chuckled from her position in the trunk, "I am? Must have slipped my mind." she then reached up and grasped the large amount of bandages that covered her back.

"Wait! Don't-" was all the assorted ponies could get out before a large tearing sound was heard. They all flinched and looked away.

"What is it? Is there something on my back?"

Applejack peeled her hoof away from her face and immediately gasped. The holes on Couriers back... they were gone! Well... not completely. The holes and incisions the doctors had probed through to pull out all the metal were gone, and in their place were little patches of pale scarring, just like the rest of the patchwork that covered the humans muscle toned back. The ponies gawked at her until Courier reached down into the trunk and pulled out a small, sky blue shirt and matching underwear, and proceeded to put them on.

Courier then returned to rifling through her trunk as Twilight fumbled with her words, "H-H-How?" was all she managed to get out.

"Science." was the muffled reply.

Twilight suddenly found her words again, "That doesn't explain it! How did you heal so fast? Do all humans do that? Do you have some internal medicine maker? Are you immor-"

Courier held up one hand, a single finger sticking up, immediately silencing the purple unicorn. She then reached into the crate again and came out with a large pile of metallic objects and other assorted things that Applejack couldn't identify, and set them all on the table next to her bloody clothes.

She looked over at Twilight as she grabbed a few seemingly random items and flattened out her clothes on the table, "I believe it's my turn for a question." she said, "Did you tamper with any of my things?"

Rainbow Dash immediately piped up, her wings fluttering in anger, "Of course not! We're not idiots!"

"I never said you were." Courier stated matter-of-factly, "I just wanted to know, is all." Applejack watched curiously as the human worked. Her hands seemed to fly from one thing to another, sewing, patching, and tearing at the clothes in front of her until Applejack couldn't even recognize the garment it was before. The cloth seemed to transform before the earth ponies eyes, the blood stained fabric was folded in and hidden under layers of less ruined fabric as Courier worked wonders on it. The human pulled small sheets of metal out of the clothes too, much to Applejacks surprise, and moved them between the layers of fabric as she went. Soon, Applejacks head hurt from looking at the flurry of activity that was Couriers hands.

"How did you do that?" asked an awestruck Twilight.

Applejack looked back to see Courier holding up her clothing to the light, all of the holes that had been there were gone, and the outfit looked exactly as it had before, albeit; less blood stained. The clothes were long, although that made sense, considering who was wearing them, with a large hole at the top for the humans head and three sleeves for her arms and torso. There was also another piece that Courier had left on the table, Applejack assumed they were the pants. Both pieces of clothes were a dark brown color with black trim and looked soft to the touch. There was a metal pauldron on one side right next to the collar that was scratched badly. All in all, her clothes looked odd. Probably horrific by Rarity's standards, but to the simple farm pony, the humans clothes were just out of the ordinary.

"Years of practice." Courier said as she laid the her clothes back on the table. Then she picked up the white blanket that had covered the table during her procedure and looked back at Twilight, "Could I have this, by chance? It already has my blood on it..." she held up the part of the sheet that had a large red stain on it.

"Ummm... Sure? Ok, back to questions." Twilight said, Courier nodded for her to continue as she returned to working on her clothes with the new sheet. "What are all those metal things you're carrying?"

Courier reached over and picked up one of the metal things and held it in front of the ponies. It was L-shaped, with a small protrusion at the base. It shined brightly under the hospital fluorescent lights and mesmerized all the ponies present. Courier spoke, "They're... Life support. They keep me breathing." she said.

Applejacks eyes narrowed. Something was wrong. Courier didn't lie, but the way she said 'life support' made Applejack suspicious.

"Oh! I'm so sorry we took them away from you, then!" Twilight exclaimed in a frightened tone, "The doctors just had to do the operation so fast and-"

"It's fine." Courier said, "As long as they're in the room with me i'll be fine."

"Oh that's good." Twilight let out a sigh, "Also that reminds me of something. i know Rainbow told you we didn't tamper with any of you stuff, and we didn't... mostly. We took away your sword. The guards were paranoid about letting you have a weapon in the operating room. Which doesn't make much sense considering you were strapped down, and there were tons of other thing that could be dangerous and-"

"Twilight. It's fine. No need to worry." Courier assured the unicorn as she put the final touches on her clothes, "Now what do you think?"

Courier stuck her arms and head into the bottom of her shirt, struggled a bit as she tried to get her mammaries in, but once she did, the rest of the shirt slid on nicely. She then grabbed her pants off the table and slipped into those, spending a few seconds getting comfortable and adjusting a few straps.

For the first time, Applejack, Rainbow Dash and Twilight got to see the human as they were supposed to; not bleeding out in a forest, not fighting off a huge timberwolf, and not strapped to an operating table. Courier had drawn her hair back into a ponytail like Applejacks while she stood there, letting her bleach white hair flow loosely down her back. She had attached the white hospital sheet seamlessly to the back of her shoulder pauldron that went across her chest until it connected with her collar, creating a cape that concealed her left arm and the weird metal contraption, while leaving the other arm completely bare of cloth. The rest of her clothes were just as they were before; a dark brown color with multiple straps and belts looping across her body.

All the ponies assembled could only say one thing: "Whoah."

Courier went back to the pile of metal contraptions as the ponies stood there, for the umpteenth time, in shocked silence. Courier took the L-shaped thing and slid it into a little holster right where her hand rested. Then she picked up a bigger metal thing that Applejack could only describe as menacing and slung it over her chest so it rested on her back. The final contraption was just a moderately long, L-shaped tube. Strangely, it was made of wood and metal, and seemed to have a large opening at the end. Courier slipped it behind her back and into a holster that rested right on her hip. The result was that the handles of the two L-shaped devices were right next to her hand, and the bigger one hanging nearby. Applejack didn't know why Courier needed those 'Life Supports' so easily accessible if she only had to be in the same room, but she wasn't ready to ask.

"What's that?" Twilight asked as Courier continued picking things up. Applejack recognized some of the object the human was holding; a needle, a bottle of pills, an inhaler, but there were other things, boxes with writing she couldn't read.

"Medicine and food." Courier answered as she slipped all of it carefully into a small satchel hidden under her new cloak.

"But I thought you said those metal things are what kept you alive." Rainbow said.

"They do," Courier answered, "But that doesn't mean I don't get hurt or sick. And, of course, I have to eat. Can I have my sword back?"

Twilight looked at Courier, then to her friends, then back, and shook her head, "Sorry, but it would put a lot of ponies here on edge. I'll keep it safe though; I promise."

Courier seemed fine with this as she slid more things into random pockets until the only thing left on the table was a pile of scrap metal and random wires. She grabbed the bag and the parts and threw them back into the trunk.

"You don't need any of that?" Rainbow Dash asked, hovering close to the box.

"Depends, do you want some non functional alien technology?"

Twilight squeaked, "YES PLEASE!"

Courier raised an eyebrow and kicked the trunk over to Twilights hooves, "Knock yourself out." then she looked around the hospital room, "Can we get out of here? It's a little cramped."

Twilight looked up from the trunk she had started drooling in, "Not yet! I still have so many questions!"

Courier sighed and jumped back on the operating table. From the look on Twilights face, it was going to be a long interview.

Author's Note

I'm not sure if anyone still cares about this fic, but i'm gonna try to finish it anyway. Might even try to edit the earlier chapters. I've gotta stop being so lazy.

Notes: I could've spent a couple thousand words narrating as she put stuff in her pockets, but that kind of stuff is killer to write and boring to read.
Also, I'm back! I'm going to finish this story if it kills me. No more being lazy. This isn't really just a story to me anymore: this is a commitment and a challenge.
Why am I telling you this? I don't know!

By the way: Not that it's a huge problem, but do any of you know how to differentiate between 'Rarity's' and 'Raritys' in terms of action and possession? It's been bugging me for a while now and any advice would be appreciated.

PS: CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM IS NEEDED. DID THIS WHOLE DAMN CHAPTER IN ONE NIGHT AND I'M PRETTY SURE THE GRAMMAR IS SHIT. PLEASE HELP.

Chapter 7: Questions With Shadows

"Could I trouble you to hand over your weapons?" -Ultra Luxe doorman

"Could I trouble you to blow it out your ass?" -Courier

While Courier perched on the operating table, the ponies all took a moment to get comfortable. Applejack and Rainbow Dash went to get some cushioned chairs from the room next door while Twilight poured over the random assortment of material that Courier had offered her so freely. As she sorted the materials she recognized some of the items; a gear, some bolts, and a few nails which made her shiver uncomfortably as she remembered the doctors pulling one out of Courier only a few hours prior. She looked up at the human: Courier was busy pushing buttons and twisting nobs on the metal thing attached to her arm. A light, amber glow emanated from the device, casting a warm glow on the humans face. Twilight winced internally, the light from the device highlighted a jagged scar that ran from the bridge of her nose to the center of her cheek. Millions of questions, too many for Twilight to process, ran through her head. Courier notice her staring out of the corner of her eye and sent a sideways glance at Twilight. The small, hazel eye seemed to take in every inch of Twilight at once, and made the mare want to run and hide.

"I- ughhhh..." Twilight fumbled with her words, trying to think of something that would explain the situation less awkward. She slid her hoof over something and brought it up between her and Courier, "What's this?"

Courier raised her eyebrows, "That... is a chip."

Twilight's eyes darted over to the 'Chip'. It was a small, plastic circle, slightly smaller than an Equestrian bit. There was lots of squigly script on one side and a picture on the other. She squinted, the picture was faded and worn, but she could just make out the visage of a human female, like Courier, but with dark black fur and a flowing dress.

"What's a chip?" she asked as she hoofed it over to Courier, who seemed to hesitate before she took it, "And is this your language? Also, who's that mare on this side?"

Courier took a deep breath, "Usually, they're called poker chips. They're used to play lots of games. Well, make bets in games. They symbolize the money you have, and the amount of chips you bet determines how much money you are willing to lose." she explained, "Although, this one is different. It's a chip for a place called the 'Sierra Madre,' that's what it says on this side. These were used to buy things as will as gamble. The girl on the back is Vera. Famous person. Didn't know her." Courier flipped the chip back to Twilight, who set it back in the pile.

She sat there for a second, then something occurred to her, "How come we speak the same language, but I can't read your words?"

"Probably for plot reasons!"

Courier and Twilight turned to turned to the doorway to see Rainbow Dash and Applejack accompanied by two new ponies; The source of the chipper voice was a the ever-cheery Pinkie Pie, followed by the unicorn Rarity, whose eyes were locked on Courier.

"What are you talking about Pinkie?" Twilight asked.

"Well it's obvious that the circumstances behind us speaking the same language are impossible to explain, so it has to be for the plot!" she exclaimed, then she looked to Courier, "Hi Miss Alien! I'm Pinkie Pie! What's your name?"

"Courier."

"But that doesn't make any sense!" Twilight started again, "There has to be a logical way to-"

"Twilight, darling, there are simply more important things to discuss right now!" Rarity said, "I for one, am thankful that our acquaintance speaks our language. It makes it all that easier to thank her!" She bowed her head to Courier, "Without you, I - we - would have been a meal for those dreadful timberwolves. You have my sincere thanks."

Courier, for her part, looked confused, "I saved you?"

All the ponies looked at her, perplexed, "Yes, you did." Rarity repeated, "In the forest. You rose up from behind us and scared away a pack of timberwolves by looking at them, then you... killed one. It bit you as well. Are you saying you don't remember any of that?"

Courier's brow knit in thought, "I... It's a bit hazy. I remember the Lucky 38, then... a break-in? The NCR..." then her face paled and her eyes grew stony, "Never mind. Doesn't matter. I... I think I remember something about a forest, but it's all blurry."

A thought occurred to Twilight, "You jabbed yourself with some kind of needle when you woke up. Does that have anything to do with it?"

Courier's eyes widened and flew to the contraption on her arm, which she immediately started fiddling with again.

The room was silent for a moment, as if Courier didn't sense that time was moving as she pressed buttons and flipped switches. Twilight spoke up again, "Miss Courier, what are you doing?"

Courier was silent for a moment before she let out a groan and put her arm down, "I was checking my inventory. I'm missing a dose of psycho, so if what you say is true, then when I woke up I accidentally injected a combat drug instead of a healing one."

"Oh." Twilight didn't know what 'Psycho' or 'Combat drugs' were, but considering the 'combat' that happened after she used it, it wasn't hard to figure out what it meant. She filed that thought away for later, "How do you check your inventory on that thing, and for that matter, what is it?"

Courier smiled and held out her wrist for the ponies to see, "It's a Pip-Boy. It stands for 'Personal-Information-Processor' and, to be perfectly honest, I have no idea how it works." she said, "It has a map, recorder, information downloader, and an on board medical suite. It's a beautiful piece of machinery. I never leave home without it."

All the ponies let out little noises of wonder as Courier flipped through multiple displays of a little cartoon human in different poses. They then sat down and got comfortable in the chairs they specifically went out to get.

"If you don't mind me asking," Rarity started once everyone was situated, "You seem to be taking being here really well. Rainbow Dash and Applejack told me of your mysterious circumstances among other things, and I must say, I would not be doing as well in your place. How are you so calm?"

Courier shrugged, "Experience." she said simply, "Been to much different places under much different circumstances. I've found that keeping a level head works better than freaking out."

"So this 'Mohave' place you told us about. You said you live there, but it's normal for you to leave often? Do you not like it?

"It's my home, of course I love it, but right now... there are some guests that I think have overstayed their visit." she said, her eyes darkening once again, "It's a shame, really: I'm the one who helped them get there in the first place. I'll have to fix that when I get back." all the ponies looked quizzically at her, "It's a problem for later. Don't worry."

"Speaking of getting back," Twilight chimed happily, "when the Princesses get here they should be able to figure out what sent you here and find a way to get you back home! But until then, you can stay here and enjoy Equestria!"

"Then you should probably tell me what to expect outside this hospital, then."

"But darling, you simply must let me design you something more... not that." Rarity whined to Courier as the human smirked back.

The group had listened as Twilight gave Courier the basics of Equestria, the other ponies adding their own banter every so often. Courier seemed to absorb every ounce of information being thrown at her, even commenting on the political structure of the Equestrian monarchy as a fragile, but genius system when Twilight told her about the Princesses she would be meeting soon. At Twilight and the others encouragement, Courier told them of her home. She detailed a barren, dusty desert filled with humans of all kinds of looks and affiliations. She told them of the shining jewel that was the city of New Vegas. When asked about the Old Vegas, she merely laughed and said that 'they left it in the old world'.

"This is armor, not regular clothes, so unless you're a smith; I'll pass." Courier said, "Besides, I like it! It's comfy and lightweight and I just got this sweet cape for it..." she gestured to the bedsheet she sewed over her shoulder.

"Why do you need armor?"

Courier's smile fell as all eyes turned on her. Twilight had to admit, she really wanted to know. Courier had proven more than adept at deflecting questions whenever it turned to things like her injuries or her skill with a sword. Twilight had a feeling her answer would explain much.
'

"Well," she started, "There's hungry animals looking for a meal out in the Mohave, and a lone Courier seems like easy prey. It's up to me to make myself a hard meal to catch." she said, "There's also people who would rather not have a Courier make their delivery. Or maybe they want what a courier's carrying all for themselves. So a courier has to be prepared to defend themselves."

Twilight and the others looked at Courier, unconvinced. They had all either seen the scars or were told of them, even the simple look of the doctors and whispers of the nurses was enough for the simplest pony to figure out that she was not telling the whole truth.

"...OK. You got me. I was a soldier. Fought in a big battle, probably the biggest in two hundred years. That's all i'm telling you, though."

A nurse opened the door hesitantly with a glasses of water held aloft in her magic. She made her way over to the group and up to Courier, "The doctors say you're clear for discharge. Just try not to come into contact with any high amounts of magic and you should be fine."

Courier took a glass of water from the nurse and nodded, "Thank you, this is perfect." she said as she looked at the glass.

Twilight tilted her head and looked at the water, "What's perfect?"

Courier didn't answer. Instead, she threw the water out of the glass and into a corner of the room.

The ponies watched the odd display, completely confused at the human's antics, "Why'd you do that?": Rainbow Dash asked.

Courier simply pointed a finger at the corner she threw the water at, "I know you're there. Now you're gonna stop hiding or i'm going to make you."

Twilight looked at the corner, questioning the human's sanity, until she noticed something odd. There was water still falling to the ground. Dripping every so often as it ran down the side of something that wasn't there.

"OHHHHHH!" Pinkie shouted, "You noticed mrs. hidey-secret-corner-mare too? I knew you had a high perception score!"

"Now," Courier got off the table and stood to her full, impressive height and cracked her knuckles, "you have thirty seconds to explain why you're here and what you're doing before I find out the hard way."

Author's Note

The Courier may be a force of good, but that doesn't mean she can't be a bitch when she needs to be.

Gonna edit the previous chapters before I post any new ones. Thanks for reading!

As always, constructive criticism is always accepted.