A Loyal Soliloquy

by Jacob Applehoof

Rating: teen
Tags: Tragedy, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Spike, Rainbow Dash, Scootaloo
Length: 4645

When one Pegasus loses everything she cares about, she must cope with what little remains. . .

After a horrible accident, Rainbow Dash is left alone. Is it possible to go on when friendship kept the mare happy for so long? What can she do to stay sane? Why should she go on? Is there hope for better things ahead? This is my first take on non shipping fan fic writing...please be kind, and don't just downvote because of the premise... ;~;

Published 2012-11-26 04:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2012-11-26 04:20:01 UTC

A Rude Awakening

Twilight awoke with a yawn, stretching awake and making her way downstairs. Spike had taken the liberty of starting his chores early, receiving a soft pet on the head from the unicorn."Spike...I have to go explore the northern caves in the area...think you can handle yourself?"

The dragon smiled wide, nodding."Course, Twi, you know I can manage things here..."

Twilight was hastily scarfing down a few slices of toast as she made her way towards the front door."Well, I'll be taking Rarity and the others with me as well...so once we're back you can see if she wants help in her boutique."

Spike gave a soft nod, snickering to himself."You know, Twilight, I think I'm getting good authoring down the fort when you all are gone...should be okay running the library if you want..."

Twilight tapped her hoof against her chin."I USUALLY close when I have to be gone for more than an hour...but if you insist..." her words trailed off as she looked at the clock."Well...then it's settled, keep this place up and running until I get back..." The unicorn gave Spike another pet, rushing out the door and shutting it behind her.

She rushed around for an hour gathering everypony, making sure they were prepared, and then looking around for the last member of their team."Hmm....now where the heck is Rainbow Dash?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rainbow Dash lay perched on her cloud, the mid day's sun high in the air. She let out a soft groan, stretching on her back as her belly coat absorbed the sun's generous warmth. It had been a lazy week, the weather team on leave from Cloudsdale after a monthly storm soaked Equestria. The sun would be up for the next few days, clouds sprinkled in here and there.

Dash wasn't complaining. As a leader of Ponyville's weather team, even with half pay she was raking in a considerable sum of money, enough to afford twice her home's rent and still pay to spruce them both up if she wanted. While she wasn't living large, regularly buying frivolous and wasteful items, the cyan mare was content with her state of living. Good friends, a warm, pleasant friend base, and enough disposable income to allow herself room to breath.

It was another hour of lazed relaxation before the Pegasus heard the sound of wings in the distance. It wasn't Pegasi wings, those would have consisted of quick and rapid flapping...no, these were long, methodical wing-strokes. Without giving herself another second, Rainbow Dash leaped into the air, back flipping before she spun into a barrel roll. Her wings expanded and she quickly launched downward moments before her cloud was destroyed the hulking monster. Dash saw it in the corner of her eye, then more."D-DRAGONS!"

She sped towards town, which was less than a minute away, when she spotted five ponies galloping towards the incoming battalion of large, winged beasts...it was her friends. She dropped down, panting and out of breath as she shook her head."T...Twi...dragons....we have to stop them..." Twilight didn't speak, instead extending a hoof, smiling softly. Dash grasped it firmly, rising to her hooves and turning to face the onslaught.

"Golly, Twi...must be at least a dozen of um" Applejack announced, slightly behind the rest of them.

"Yes...but they aren't invincible...everypony ready?" She looked back, all of her friends giving a soft nod. She turned forward, sliding her back hooves into the dirt and gritting her teeth. A bright light hit the horde, followed by the subsequent shockwave of magic. The dragons in the center of the blast reeled backwards, shaking their heads and doing back-strokes in the air. The left side dive bombed the ponies, charging fire in their mouths as they neared.

Twilight yelped, grunting as she channeled a shield, the top caving in as fireballs pelted the magical barricade and scorched the earth around them. Fluttershy was clinging onto Rarity, who tried to increase the power of Twilight's spell. The first fireball made her fall back, her alabaster coat tinged with dirt as she scrambled to regroup with the others. Twilight simply shut her eyes as sweat trickled down her forehead. Conjuring the shield took a physical tole on the violet unicorn as much as it did a mental impact. The barrier wasn't going to survive many more blasts, and she knew that.

Her gaze slowly shifted to Dash, who's eyes were wide and fearful. Never had Twilight seen such terror in the Pegasus' form, let alone the level of fear clutching the poor pony."R-Rainbow Dash...run..." Her words were broken, almost sorrowful. Dash tilted her head.

"Wha...and leave you all here to...NO!" The element of Loyalty was quick to turn down her friend's request...but Twilight was persistent.

"Rainbow Dash...you NEED to evacuate Ponyville...they don't know what's coming."

"But what about..."

"...WE'LL BE FINE...JUST GO! I ONLY HAVE ENOUGH MAGIC TO DISTRACT THEM ONCE...USE IT TO GET AWAY!" Twilight held back the tears that welled in her eyes as she turned towards the cyan mare, who was openly crying as she continued to protest, hoping she would think of a way.

"Please..." she begged, her words caked with dread, looking at the invading horde."We can....fight them...it'll be fine..."

"STOP IT!" Twilight cried out, stomping her hoof,"we don't have time for this...just go..."

Rainbow cringed, her rose irises shimmering brightly, tears trickling down her cheeks as she clenched her jaw, brow furrowed as she backed up."I'm gonna come back....hold them off until I get back...I...I won't abandon you all!"

Dash's wings spread as she backed up, her tail to the shield as she whimpered. Her friends looked on, their eyes glittering as if to say 'goodbye', making it only worse for the poor equine. She turned and blasted from the shield, Twilight responding by shooting another shock-wave into the dragons, making one drop down and begin clawing at the magical barrier. Claw marks singed into the aura, making Twilight cry out as her magic fizzled out.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Rainbow Dash shot through the air, a rainbow trailing behind her as she rocketed towards town. Se screamed at the top of her lungs, calling all of the Pegasi out into the open."DRAGONS ARE ATTACKING...ROUND UP EVERYPONY, LEAD THEM EAST. NOW!"

The resident fifty Pegasi were quick to gather ponies our of town. Dash made her way to her friends' houses, trying to get their loved ones out. The Apple Family was stubborn, but an impending dragon attack convinced them to move. Sweetie Belle grasped Opalescence and rushed towards the group heading eastward.

Dash sighed, dropping down in front of Twilight's library door and kicking it open. Spike yelped, jumping to attention and scrambling towards the entrance."R-Rainbow Dash? What the hay...?"

She grasped him by the back of his neck, rushing out and pushing him towards the crowd."Don't ask questions, just go with them...it's an emergency!" she called back, rushing off to Fluttershy's cottage.

Angel put up a fight, but the bunny eventually went off into the forest, grumbling to himself. Dash whispered to herself as she took off,"Please..."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The five watched in deep melancholy as Rainbow flew to town, their gaze going back to the dragons circling and attacking the shield. The one that had landed was making severe slices at the magic, making Twilight cry out as she desperately tried to channel more power just to keep it up."I...I can't keep this up..." Twilight looked over, her voice shaky with fear."I...I'm sorry."

She shut her eyes, tears dripping copiously onto the dirt as she lowered her head, feeling four hooves on her back. Turning to face her friends, Twilight grinned softly as they smiled back at her, wet tears staining their cheeks as they looked back at the unicorn.

"Shucks Twi...we know you tried...ah couldn't a' asked for a better friend..."

"Same here, darling."

"We...um...don't blame you at all..."

"Wherever this takes us...we'll be there together, and I'll still be the one throwing parties..."

Twilight grinned softly, looking among her friends."I'm glad this is how it ends...only Dash could make this better...but under the circumstances..." Her friends piled next to her, hugging her tightly as they wept. The shield slowly pulsed and dissipated with a wave, sending the dragon in front of them a few steps back. The five pressed their heads together, hugging as they heard a blast of fire explode from the dragon's maw.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Pegasus went as fast as she could, whimpering as she saw smoke from where she left the group. Her heart was pumping in her chest, dragons circling the area. Suddenly the air around her melted and crackled. She ducked as a plasma-like burst of magic arched inches from her. It must have been at least three dozen shots going off in-sync, making the Pegasus flinch and drop to the ground. Unicorns, flown in by chariots of pure magic cascaded into view. Their missiles of mana made a glorious crescendo as they reached the dragon horde. Crashing against their scaled hides, the magic expanded into a ball of crackling lightning, making them flinch and disengage from their path. As the royal battalion began pursuit, Dash quickly went to check on her friends. She searched feverishly, whimpering and panting as she checked everywhere except where she left them.

Her eyes wet with fresh tears as she looked back towards the center of the valley, a deep, circular hole a few inches deep lay, the grass burnt and gone. She dropped to her knees, her lower lip quivering as she looked at the charred remains of five ponies. Color and race were indistinguishable, all black and only portraying the faintest sign of past life. Dash had held back too long, and collapsed forward, head pressing to the dirt as she sobbed. Her voice broke as her cries got more and more chaotic. Reality continued to pelt her, every happy memory she had with them, Applejack and Fluttershy, Rarity and Pinkie Pie, even Twilight. They were gone.

She slowly rose, taking another look at the scene."I...I'm so sorry...everypony..." she grit her teeth as her tears blinded and impeded remorse."I'll never forget what you've done for me...what you did made my life so much better. W-we were suppose to be friends forever..." She couldn't speak any more, turning and dropping again, this time losing consciousness and fainting.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The funeral was two days later, on the hills outside of Ponyville. Everyone in the town, including the Princesses, attended. It was only fair that the five that had impeded the attack on Ponyville would be mourned by the entire town. It was a long wait for everyone to get there, but Rainbow Dash was last. Her eyes were faded and her hooves dragged on the cut grass. There were five mounds of dirt, the ponies already buried out of respect and severity of damage to the bodies, and a makeshift wooden stage was made as a memorial. Five pictures were set, one of each pony, side-by-side along a metal wall that would remain there forever.

The ceremony began at once, a mellow drum melody stirring up as Celestia took the stage. Her eyes were empty, hair pulled back into a black, formal net."Dear residents of Ponyville...we are not gathered here to commend the bravery of these souls, though I would like nothing more. We are gathered here to put to rest five ponies who make the ultimate sacrifice to protect those they loved. In holding off the attacking horde, Applejack, Pinkie Pie, Rarity, Fluttershy, and Twilight Sparkle gave their lives to save yours. They didn't need to give up their bodies, to leave scars of tears where they once tread, but in doing so, they assured that your town would be saved." Her lower lip quivered as she took a breath."In a moment, we will reflect on each of their accomplishments, and set them down for a final rest, but before that, let us remember that they were friends. They left Equestria without resentment, or anger, or melancholy towards us, but with the noble goal of making Equestria a better place."

The crowd slowly filed into groups, those who were friends or relatives of one of the five moved to that pony's grave, while residents of the town alone stayed behind and listened quietly. Dash remained behind the crowd, watching everything going on and noticing a green and purple dragon off in the distance. Spike's eyes were swollen and had a tint of red around the rim as he watched from the library. He made eye contact with Rainbow Dash, biting his lip and looking away as he headed back inside.

"Firstly..." Celestia began,"Rarity, a seamstress and friend to many. She cared for all of her customers, obtaining such a following that she was tasked in making clothes for a royal wedding. One cannot wish for a better friend, and sister." The diluted sobs of a child trailed off as Dash spotted Sweetie Belle galloping towards town. Celestia shook her head softly as she moved on.

"Fluttershy was a mare that few knew...and even fewer that really talked to here...but those that did would no doubt speak of her kindness...how she would never leave her friends' side, even when facing her deepest fears..."

Dash zoned out as Celestia spoke, her mind a haze as she rubbed her dull, lifeless eyes. Why was Celestia talking about HER friends she thought.I'M the one who lost them....I should be the one who talks about how great they were...how Rarity was always such a snob...but never looked down on others. How Applejack would never get mad at me for interrupting her, flashing that beautiful grin. How Fluttershy would hang with me when I'm bored...do things I want to. Dash kicked at the ground, looking up at the Princess and galloping off.

The rain slowly began to pick up as Dash sped up, huffing as she ran to nearby hill. Her voice cracked as she screamed, not caring who could hear her. She was fed up, losing too much to go on. What did she have left, who was alive that she truly cared for? Scootaloo and Spike were too young to understand her pain, and Big Mac and Dash had never met eye-to-eye. Dash just needed time, a moment alone from the crowd and spotlight. She was the last Element of Harmony, no doubt that would make her popular for all the wrong reasons.

For the next hour Rainbow Dash watched the ceremony from a cloud, waiting until they all had left before she floated down. The few who remained or came back after the crowd had dispersed watched as the Loyal mare paid her respects. She stopped at the mural, pictures of her friends all around as she laid down a bouquet of yellow lilies."Um...h...hey guys...um...sup?" Her words were forced, lower lip quivering as she felt her throat begin to shut."I'm...sorry, I'm so, so sorry I left you five. I should be one of these pictures...you know I'd die for you...all of you. I would have given my life to keep Ponyville safe...why....WHY!?" Her hoof slammed down, chin shivering as she sniffed."It's not fair...it's not...FAIR...YOU WOULDN'T LEAVE ME LIKE THIS! You...you wouldn't leave me to pick up the pieces..." Her eyes were shut hard as she whimpered, turning to face a form blocking her."P...Princess Celestia?"

The alicorn sighed, nodding slowly as she advanced towards the tombstones."I have lost many students, had to see many of them lose their life for this Empire...for me." Her face had no emotion as she spoke, light glinting off of her golden hoofguards that tenderly traced the epitaph of Fluttershy's stone."You six were outstanding...exceeding my expectations ten fold. I am glad at least one of you survived...but it is with great melancholy that you will outlive them." The alabaster mare dropped down, pressing her royal mane to Twilight's dirt mound."I had hoped that she would outlive me, finally I would not be the one that survived time." Dash saw a tear twinkle and drip onto the ground.

Without another word, Celestia rose and put a hoof on Dash's back."You have been given a great gift...the ability to spread the word of your friends and their legacy. You know them better than many, so you alone must tell of their greatness. Do not let their story and memory be compromised..."

Dash barked back as Celestia went to leave."You know...just because you rule Equestria...doesn't mean you own me!"

"Excuse me?"

"I lost five of my best friends...and I'll never see them again...and...and you tell me it's my responsibility to keep talking about them!? I'm not ready for that, damn it!" Her gaze dropped,"I'm not ready to talk about them like that..."

The elder mare turned to face the cyan Pegasus."Do not speak of them as if they are gone...but as if they must live on. As long as they live in the minds of others...they will never leave. However, if you act as if they never existed...you'll never let them go...nor leave those that still remain in physical form." Without another word, Celestia took off, her form disappearing behind a batch of thick clouds.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It had been a week since the funeral, and neither mane nor tail of Rainbow Dash had been seen in since. Few knew she roamed the skies. The weather team received her resignation anonymously, and those that could fly weren't able to contact her at home either. Many were curious, few were terrified. One such fearful equine was none other than Rainbow Dash's number one fan. Scootaloo had hastily searched ever nook of Ponyville, an eerie silence beseeching the foal to continue her search. It was another week until the filly gave up, her mind too weak to go on. Spike, on the other hand, had much more time to himself than he wanted. His last conversation with Twilight was about responsibility. He had no idea what it took to be an adult, and how could he? He was just a kid inside what did he know. With great fatigue, the dragon grasped a length of rope, pondering to himself as he looked at the ceiling.

Rainbow Dash lay in her house, shutters shut and front door locked. Even after what Celestia said, the Pegasus needed time. Her mental wounds seared hotly in her head as she winced. A loud knocking on her door barely caused her to stir."RAINBOW DASH!? RAINBOW...PLEASE...please open up..." A small fillies voice echoed. Dash had ignored Scootaloo many times before...but this time, something was wrong. Dash's heart stung as she fought to ignore the young one, her mind not ready to open up. In a way, Rainbow Dash couldn't admit that she was hurting, locked away to stop the confrontation altogether. The knocking didn't cease, getting louder and louder in the mare's head. Finally, it couldn't be silenced any longer. Dash got up, hesitantly approaching the incessant rattle and clock of the intruding guest. Her hoof raised, unlatching the door and clicking it open.

"H-hello?" She peeked out. Without being about to yelp, the Pegasus was sent flying backwards by the door as it crashed open, a half-sobbing filly clutching at her chest."R-RAINBOW DASH!"

"C...calm down...please Scootaloo..." Dash's eyes welled with tears as she just hugged the filly."I...I'm sorry..." For the next hour, Dash just sat there, hugging Scootaloo and rocking her softly. Is this what she had become? Some deserting mare that leaves those that are hurting just as much as her while she acted like a narcissistic little child? Not any more she told herself, I'm not letting others go out like me...

"Hey...what's that note?" Scootaloo pointed slowly to to the desk. Dash tilted her head confused for a second before a knock echoed out. Slowly getting to their hooves, the two turned. Dash peeked out, blinking as a royal stallion stood tall on a cloud, wings spread as he spoke."Ms. Rainbow Dash...yes?" His armor shimmered softly in the afternoon sun, helmet covering the dull blue mane.

"Y...yes" Dash spoke softly, opening the door the rest of the way.

"You are the friend of a Ms. Twilight, Fluttershy, Rarity, Applejack, and Pinkamina...correct?" His words required no answer, as he more stated a fact than he did ask a question. Without another word, he entered after Dash gave a soft nod."The will for those who lost their lives last week, your friends, wish to give you something...in what little will they had, combined with letters and information from around town, it seems you are the only benefactor to these mares' items, and as such, they have been coated with a magic to allow them to be placed in a cloud home." He set down a cart full of items, nodding softly before turning away."After we gave a few specific items were given to their families upon request...these remaining items are yours..."

The cyan mare looked down, then eyed the stallion again."And...the cart? what should I do with it once I look through everything...?"

"It was part of the will, Rainbow Dash...I believe it was from Sweet Apple Acres..." He turned his head, closing the door as he left.

"T...that's a lot of stuff...you need help with that?" Scootaloo looked the cart over slowly, returning her gaze to the other.

"No thanks kiddo...think I'll check it out by myself..." Dash's gaze shifted, fresh tears wishing to break from her eyes. She didn't even watch Scootaloo leave as she began taking things out. Many useless items of sentimental value, all arranged on Dash's wall. The hollowed out book that held the Elements of Harmony back when Discord came back, Fluttershy's picture she took overcoming her fear of flying, Pinkie Pie's book of cupcakes, even Rarity's sewing kit. As she looked through the scattered memories and happy moments, a smile slowly grew on the Pegasus. She wasn't sad that her friends were gone...she was...happy that they had so much time together.If it wasn't for Twilight, I probably wouldn't even have friends like this. Fluttershy maybe, but even then...I barely spent any time with her...

After everything was emptied, a single, shining item lay at the bottom. Using her wings to lift it, Dash looked at her reflection in the fire ruby Spike had given to Rarity all those months ago. Haven't talked to that little guy in ages...maybe I should cheer him up with this...get his mind off things she thought as she flapped her wings and took off. The trip to town was quieter and gave the mare nothing but the echoes of her thoughts. and the soft, rapid flapping of her wings to hear. The library came into view, and hesitantly, Dash's ear pressed against the door. Silence... Her hoof slowly pressed the door open. Spike wore a soft, dull expression as she spied him sitting in a chair, reading. Something was off, but Dash couldn't put her hoof on it."S-Spike?"

His gaze drifted up, a timid, subtle smile graced his lips as he put the book down and walked to her."Oh...Dash, you're okay! Didn't think you'd come back...Scootaloo's worried sick ya know."

"Talked to her a few hours ago...nice to see you're okay..." She leaned in and pulled the scaly being into a hug. He was an uncommonly cold temperature, making Dash coil back and pull the fire ruby out."Here..."

"...what's..."

"It was in Rarity's will...I thought you should have it." He made no attempt to grab it."Um...you...want me to just put it down or something?" Again, Spike said nothing, just looking forward with a blank look on his face. She rested the gemstone on Spike's chair, backing up."So...um... you okay?"

"...mm hmm..." He turned away slowly, walking back and taking a seat, raising the book again and looking away. Dash knew she wasn't welcome, and maybe he just needed more time. She slowly made her escape, trotting off slowly.

She didn't feel right...like something had happened, something else...things were different. She laid in bed, twitching softly as she winced. J-Jerk...how dare he ignore me...I...I don't deserve this...does he think me insane? Suddenly, she looked over and noticed a green flash of flames, a parchment slipping onto her bare desk. Dash leaned over and scooped it up.Green fire...must be from Spike she thought, opening the note and reading slowly."Dear Rainbow Dash, and all those that read this...I am sorry it came to this. I have come to the conclusion that like isn't meant for me. Without friends, what do I have? I'm, sorry it came to this...I'm sorry..." She trailed off, eye twitching as she shoved the letter into her saddlebags and took off towards Ponyville.I just left and already you wanna end it all...fuckfuckfuckfFUCK!

Scootaloo saw Dash and eagerly tried to keep up."Woh...Dash...what's?"

"Don't talk...just get the mayor...an ambulance...anypony to the Library!" She rocketed away as fast as she could. The library door flew open, Dash looking around frantically as she spies legs kicking above her. Spike's neck was tight around a noose, hands as his side as he eyed the Pegasus. She leaped to him, biting roughly on the rope until it snapped.

He dropped and fell onto his flank, looking up at her with tears in his eyes."I...I..."

She dropped down, punching him hard and sending his form crashing into a bookcase. She didn't give him time to react, tears welling in her eyes and streaming down her face as she fell upon him, landing heavy punches to his quivering form."YOU PIECE OF SHIT, HOW DARE YOU! HOW DARE YOU LEAVE ME HERE!...How....how dare you leave me to pick up the pieces..." She lay over him, crying hard as his blood was soaked into her coat. The mayor, along with two royal guards who happened to be with her. They gasped, Dash's shivering, crying form looking up with blood covering her face."He...he wanted to leave me..." she whimpered, hooves shaking as she trotted over slowly, twitching as she looked at them.

The guards stood in front of the mayor, spears pointed at the mare."Halt...you are under arrest for the murder of a domesticated dragon and assumed mental disability...turn around!"

Dash reeled back, snarling as she looked at them."Murder...you...I saved him! Why would I...you think I'm crazy, don't you? You...you want to take me away, BECAUSE I'M ALL THAT'S LEFT" she hollered, backing up as they got closer."Crazy....I'M NOT CRAZY! Don't you see...I have to tell their story...I HAVE TO..." she one step too far, and gasped as the spear pierced her chest. She gasped, feeling the long, metal pole stab through her upper chest and out her back."But...their story..." she whispered, dropping to her knees as one stallion pulled his spear out of her. She collapsed, eyes flickering as she whimpered, grasping Spike's body and coughing blood."Spike...t...tell our story...don't let their memory die..."

One guard approached the dragon and pressed a hoof to his neck."Wow..."

"What..." the mayor questioned, getting closer."did Dash kill him?"

"No...she did not kill this dragon" He said, picking up a bit of parchment stuck in Dash's saddlebag."This is his suicide letter..."

"THEN HURRY...CALL AN AMBULANCE!" she cried out, worried for Spike.

The other royal guard turned to her."He is dead, Mayor Mare. He's been dead for at least a week now...judging from the smell. This note is also at least a week old..."

She opened her mouth, gasping softly."She really did lose everything...even her sanity..."The mayor trotted forward, a tender sorrow in her eyes as she dropped down and closed Dash's eyes."Rest...my little pony...your soliloquy is over."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A soliloquy (from Latin: "talking by oneself") is a device often used in drama when a character speaks to himself, relating thoughts and feelings, thereby also sharing them with the audience. Other characters, however, are not aware of what is being said.

A soliloquy (from Latin: "talking by oneself") is a device often used in drama when a character speaks to himself.

speaks to himself