Call of Friendship: Black Opsby AlphadudChaptersThere is a lab here?The Small Walk of WalkinessA new dimension with a side dish of extra troubleThere is a lab here?Prologue: There is a lab here? The U.S.S. Barack Obama, aircraft carrier. On this ship there is a soldier by the name of Crosby. No one knows his full name since he mostly keeps it to himself. To be honest, Crosby himself forgot his own name after a while so he just stuck with it. He's normally a quiet guy, but today he was whistling a tune while walking with his gear on through the hallways of the Obama. Normally when Crosby is bored, he would watch Harper and Mason fight each other in the ring, but today he felt like taking a stroll throughout the Obama. As he walked down the dull corridors of the aircraft carrier he got lost deep in thought. "Maybe I should go down to the range and practice my marksmanship..." Crosby thought as he walked past the food court. He stopped quickly and looked back. "I could get some grub too," he pondered, but ignored his stomach and continued on his path to the unknown. He just kept walking and thinking about irrelevant things like how a A.D.S worked, or how they got control over C.L.A.W.'s but, he mostly thought about his special Quadrotor he had been working on for the last few week's. The Quad-rotor actually just needed to be repaired since it had some malfunctions somewhere. Currently Crosby had forgotten what happened to it in the first place; in fact he didn't even get told by the drone inspector. He just came up to him and said "Fix this," while pointing at the Quadrotor. Many don't know that when it comes to drones Crosby is a genius. In fact, it was him who rigged a flamethrower on a C.L.A.W. unit before. That C.L.A.W. unit was used by Section, Harper and Salazar in Pakistan. After they came home from the mission they told Crosby that the flamethrower worked perfectly against Menedez lackeys. He was trying to attach a rocket pod from an A.D.S that had been malfunctioning on to the Quadrotor he was repairing. It slowly but steadily became a project he continued to work on, since it was a major trial and error of attaching the rocket pod somewhere on the Quadrotor without it becoming too heavy for sustainable flight. Crosby thought about making the rotors have a higher RPM, but that wouldn't help since he also reinforced the armor on "MQ-28 Guardian" as he called his project, and it would probably end up overloading the electronics inside the drone. As he was wondering about where to place the rocket pod, he walked past the war room where Commander Section was instructing some other soldiers about an operation they were planning. Crosby kept trekking for a grand five minutes until he bumped in to another soldier, which caused him to fall down flat on his ass. "Hey man! Watch where you're goin'!" the soldier shouted. "H-huh? Oh... Uh sorry man." Crosby muttered, as he was snapped out of his thoughts. He then proceeded to hold out a hand to pull up the other soldier. The soldier happily took Crosby's hand and got pulled to his feet then said "Just watch were you're goin', wouldn't be to fun if you bumped in to Admiral Briggs and knocked him down... Uh, I have to go I'm late for a briefing, catch you later man." and with that said he turned around and started to jog down the hallway. This made Crosby extremely confused, namely because he had been walking around deep in thought and hadn't noticed where he was, he quickly looked around for any sign or map that would show him where he was and found one on the ceiling that said "Barracks." Now that he knew where he was, he looked for a door that said "Crosby" on it, and when he found it, he opened the door and went inside his room. When he entered, he made his way over to his desk and picked up his phone which was filled with all sorts of Intel and information, plus a few nude pictures here and there. But mostly music, like for example; Skrillex, Deadmau5, Justin bei- I mean Sabaton and Hammerfall. Oh and also Scorpions because they are awesome like that. He sat down at his desk and searched in a drawer for the headphones, but only found boring documents. He continued to rummaged around in the drawer until he decided to just empty it all over the floor. As the documents lay spread out, he noticed a ring and a few other items that caught his eye. First thing was a note that said "I.O.U a good one hundred bucks // Mike." Second was the pistol he had hidden in the drawer. He picked up the note and examined it for awhile while thinking where the fuck Harper could find one hundred dollars. Crosby was pretty sure he was broke, he put the note in his pocket for now, and same with his phone. Then he inspected the pistol that was lying on the floor, a Tac-45 complete with one mag and a bullet in the chamber. Crosby thought about why he kept the Tac-45 there and always came back to the same thing "In case of emergency", which was the only valid reason. He picked up the pistol to inspect it further but found that his headphones was under it, so he put the pistol in his holster and picked up his headphones. He then took out his phone and plugged in his headphones, then put them on his selected tunes. Now that his small task of finding his headset was done, he stood up from the chair and avoided the mess on the floor thinking "I'll clean it up later". He walked out of his room closing the door and then looked around the corridor, Crosby noted that it was really empty in the corridor... Almost too empty, he quickly went to the nearest corner and checked if someone was there. "Not a single living thing in sight, except that fly over there on the wall" Crosby thought as he peeked around the corner, he then checked his phone for the time and saw that it was 11:50 AM, meaning that every one was probably at the food court eating. Crosby facepalmed for being so paranoid, but who could blame him? Being a J-SOC soldier causes you to become paranoid when things get a bit too quiet. Crosby then shook his head and continued on his stroll until someone decided to either find or radio him if he was needed. After about twenty minutes of aimlessly wandering, Crosby found him self in a section of the Obama he never had entered before. In fact, he didn't even know this part of the ship existed until now. This part of the Obama was called the Labs. "Sounds ominous" he thought as he entered the mysterious section of the ship. The first thing he noticed was that the walls were much whiter than usual; secondly was that the corridor he was in was empty, "The geeks must be eating." Crosby thought as he started to trudge through a corridor, but then stopped in front of a door and looked above it read a sign. "Bio-warfare" it said, "Nope I ain't going inside there unless i want to get a virus and die horribly or be sterile for life." he thought almost sprinting away from the door. As he hightailed the corridors of The Lab section, he found another door that caught his eye, "Cyber-warfare" the sign said beside the door. "Oooh, high tech stuff." Crosby said out loud as he entered the room. The first thing that caught his eye was the HUMONGOUS screen on the far side of the room, then we have all the holographic displays everywhere. Some contained new schematics for drones, others contained info. They're nothing super special here, so he just kept walking looking through a few computers before finding one folder that made him laugh a lot. The folders name was "Hentai", on someones user named William. Crosby had no idea who it was but he certainly was going to rub it in his face when he got the chance. Crosby ceased messing around with the computers and started to see if there was anything more appealing in the room, but found nothing of interest. So he left the room and carried on until he marched past an unmarked door, at first he ignored it, but as he kept walking he had this nagging feeling in the back of his head. Telling him to turn around and check and Crosby being the curious type, he gave in to the suspicion as he turned around and marched towards the unmarked door. At first he just tried to open it but found out that it was locked, he then tried to ram it open only to fall on the floor groaning with a pain. "Son of a bitch that hurt," Crosby said through gritted teeth, he noticed the retinal scanner beside the door. He mentally slapped himself for not looking for something that could open the door. He stood up and stared at the retinal scanner for a few minutes, then checked the clock, which read 1:30 PM. "Still got thirty minutes before anyone arrives." then Crosby looked at the scanner, tilting his head a bit. "Why would they need a retinal scanner for an unmarked door...?" "Well, here goes nothing, but I swear to God if this thing sets off an alarm I'm jumping overboard..." he leaned in towards the retina scanner and it scanned his eye in a flash of red light, then the unexpected happened, "Retina access confirmed, Welcome Crosby." a mechanical voice said, and with that the door opened up. Crosby being dumbfounded as to why he had access to this part of the lab since well, hes not scientist, a genius, or a geek for that matter. He's just your run of the mill soldier, nothing more, nothing less. But to suddenly have access to what he assumed was a top secret lab is quite mind boggling when you're just a soldier. What he first saw when he stepped in the room were unknown equipment, lots of weapon caches and equipment crates. Crosby walked over to a weapon case and opened it and saw an FAL OSW with a Millimeter scanner, Fore grip, Adjustable stock, Laser sight, and a Silencer, it also had armor piercing bullets. What didn't make any sense to him was the fire mode on it that said Laser mode. "maybe it could shoot lasers, or maybe not, whatever it does it Doesn't matter." he thought as he picked it up and flung it over his shoulder. Next he went over to an equipment crate that had a huge text that said PROTOTYPE, which translated to Crosby into "Open me!". Crosby thought about it for a few seconds before deciding to open it and found a Quadrotor with a attached grenade launcher, reinforced plating and a "Smart" A.I Implanted in it. There was a note that said "The Quadrotors name is Chiro, take good care of him!" Crosby examined the note, then glanced at the Quadrotor and against his better judgement he decided to start it up. The Quadrotor sprung to life flying up a few inches in the air before rotating around a few times. "Oooh, that was a good nap." Chiro said, his robotic voice making a few beeps as it awakened. The Quadrotor's paint looked very worn and had a few dents and scratches on the armor plating. Crosby, still quiet, stared at the machine, and if not for his mask covering his face his jaw might have dropped to the floor, Chiro stared at the wall oblivious to the fact that Crosby was looking at him. "Where am I?" Chiro said out loud while rotating around, and saw that Crosby eyeballing at him. Crosby didn't move a muscle, as the Quadrotor rotated to face him but when it just stopped to stare at him, no reaction came until a few moments later when he got a yell coming from the Quadrotor. "AAAAAH!" It screeched while flying backwards, straight into the wall, hitting a switch which caused a door to open up behind some crates. "Don't scare me like that!" Chiro yelled. "Sorry, didn't mean to," Crosby answered as he then looked to the left of him and saw that a doorway that appeared out of no where. "Was that doorway there before?" he asked Chiro. "No... At least I think not, I mean, I just woke up with no idea where I am." Chiro responded. "True" Crosby thought then proceeded to walk through the newly appeared doorway, as he stepped through the doorway he looked around and saw that the room was filled a lot of monitors, computers and holographic displays every where. Crosby went deeper into the room and towards a computer and looked what was going on. "Hey buddy! Wait for me!" Chiro shouted whilst flying after Crosby. Crosby only found a document about trans-dimensional space travel on the computer, and something about creating a portal to another universe, and all that was in a chamber at the other end of this room. Most of it was top secret so he couldn't get much information from the document on the computer. "Wha'cha looking at?" Chiro asked while he slowly flew around the room. "Some weird-ass top secret document about Inter-universal space travel. Heh, can you believe that shit? I mean, they were obviously high when they came up with the idea, but to actually try to create a portal... Come on, that wouldn't be possible," Crosby ranted. Chiro just remained quiet and looked at the door on the far side of the room, he then flew towards the chamber, and hovered in front of it. "Hey look! There is a pedestal in there, with a red SHINY button on it!" Chiro said sounding very excited. "Huh? There is a door there?" Crosby said confused, totally forgetting the document he read on the computer just a few seconds ago, Crosby got up from the chair and walked over to Chiro and saw a glass door, inside of the room was a few lights of some sort and a black pedestal with a holographic screen on it with a over-sized red button. "It's looks like its formed like a hexagon..." Crosby thought. "Might as well try to get in now" Crosby tried to open the door, only to find that the door was locked. When he checked why he saw that there was a keypad that needed a code. Crosby didn't know the code even though he just read it like one minute ago, I mean come on! He has less memory span than a goldfish sometimes. "Do you know the combination?" Chiro asked Crosby who just replied with a shrug. "Great... Now I'll never get to press that SHINY red button." "You know you could just hack it right? I mean you are a drone right?" Crosby asked. "What do I look like? A hacking drone? I'm a freaking combat drone, you jackass! See this!?" Chiro replied irritated, waving around the grenade launcher. Crosby just sighed and looked at the keypad, for a few moments, he thought up a valid sounding combination and decided to try it out. "One, one, one ... err... One?" he said as he pressed one four times in a row, Chiro just scoffed at Crosby's stupidity, but to his surprise, the keypad lit up in a green light and unlocked the door. "Can't believe that worked." Chiro said. "Me neither... But I totally knew the combination." Crosby agreed, as they walked and hovered in to the room Crosby looked around to see that the room was in fact shaped as a hexagon. When they got to the pedestal in the middle of the room he looked at the screen and this is what he saw on the holographic display. T-DPCP // Trans-Dimensional Portal Control Pedestal. User : Anonymus Mode Manual. Please choose destination. Or Shuffle destination. (Not recommended, Seriously don't even think about pressing that Shuffle button.) There was a "Shuffle" option on the Pedestal and since Crosby didn't know smack he just pressed the button and hoped for the best. But what he forgot to read when he pressed the button was "Shuffle mode is extremely unstable use at own risk!" but since Crosby never reads notifications cause he's so lazy, this is gonna come back and bite him in the ass. Now the screen was updated and it read. T-DPCP // Trans-Dimensional Portal Control Pedestal. User : Anonymus Mode Shuffle. Selecting destination please wait. Done... Destination #4331 Calculating distance's betwen universes. Please hold. Done... Error: Could not calculate. Loading fail-safes... Error: 404 not found. Hit the button when ready. Now all he had to do was to hit the comedicly oversized red button and begin his journey to the unknown universe that was planned for him... But for once in his whole life he hesitated. Crosby didn't know why, he just had a terrible feeling of something bad happing. But he just pushed down the feeling back to its cage and chained it up again, then he read a text just above the giant red button "Do. Not. Touch. Button. Or actually do whatever you want. Im just a text, Not a cop." just when he read that, this song came on on his phone and blasted his ears with music. It made resisting to press the button even harder. Since the lyrics of the song wanted him to try it out. He was not really sure if he wanted to try it out, as his hand hovered over the button he waited for the drop to come. And when it did, he almost punched the button so hard it got stuck. All while Chiro was surprisingly quiet. Nothing happened for a few seconds until roof opened up some hatches in the corner of the room and extended out some coils of some sort quite shortly after beams shot into the middle of the room causing an unusual vortex to open up. It was black, portal shaped and sucking Crosby and Chiro into it. "HOLY FUU-" Chiro screamed, as he got sucked right in "THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!" Chiro yelled from inside the vortex Crosby quickly grabbed onto the pedestal, but the force of the vortex is overwhelming, Crosby's grip was slowly failing him. "I haven't seen anything suck this much since... I HEART HUCKABEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE'S!" He yelled as he lost his grip and got sucked in the vortex. The vortex then closed it self just leaving a scorch mark on the floor, and lots of power fluctuations across the ship. To be continued... A/N : If you still need some extra information on Black Ops, these links may help. Thank you for reading! Proof-read by Pinkies imagination and RainbowBob Edited by Chiromishi (My good old buddy) Crosby (main char) The FAL OSW TAC-45 MQ-27 "Dragonfire" Or Quadrotor CLAW unit A.G.R. Or ADS as its called ingame The Small Walk of WalkinessA/N: One might ask: Who in the seven hells is Spoofer? And who the fuck is Crosby? The answer is simple - You would’ve known, had you clicked the damned wikipedia links and read the previous chapter, but as a matter of fact - no one did. So I’ll answer it for you. The answer is - They’re imaginary. The manifestation of some kind of gorilla fucking alcoholic. Fractions of one’s imagination, brought to life by sparkly magic-ish magic, that only exists in the seventh plane of torment - EQUESTRIA, or something in that general direction. Chapter 2: The Small Walk of Walkiness After a few minutes of walking, Crosby, who was deep in thought, was thinking of the buzzing sound that was missing. At first he thought that Chiro was just hanging behind, but after a few minutes, he didn’t hear that continued low-hum buzzing that he usually heard from Chiro. Albeit he only knew him for 30 minutes or so, but who cares about that. As they kept walking, Crosby thought that Chiro might have a stealth mode and entered it. So he thought that he might just give him a question. “Hey Chiro, do you have a Stealth mode?” Crosby asked. He waited a few minutes but was never given an answer. “Heeeelloo Chirooo, anybody home?” Crosby asked again. “Now where the fuck is he? Did he fly off? Unless.... Did i forget him back there?” He thought as he stopped dead in his tracks and looked around for his Quadrotor friend but as he found none he just turned around and stared at the way that he and Spoofer came from. Spoofer noticed how Crosby stopped and looked around. He was a bit confused why he was looking around so he stopped him self and thought of a small clever prank. “Whats wrong? Saw a giant frost spider?” Spoofer asked his voice was dipped in mirth and he could barely contain his laughter. “No I’m just looking fo- Wait what?” Crosby asked extremely nervous, Crosby then got extremely tense and started to look around. “Y-You got Giant S-S-Spiders??” Crosby stammered out. Spoofer couldn’t hold his laughter any more. He collapsed and rolled around on the ground with laughter. Crosby was just looking at Spoofer with pretty much the facial expression that said “are you fucking kidding me?” but thanks to his mask covering his face he did not really get the point across. So he had to verbally express himself. “Are you fucking kidding me?” Crosby asked, being a bit annoyed by Spoofer’s shenanigans. After a few minutes Spoofer gradually calmed down to the level where he could speak without laughter getting in the way. “Oh cheer up, Brian! it was a harmless joke. You know what they say.” Spoofer after he calmed down. “My name isn’t Brian...” Crosby said in his defense, clearly not understanding the joke. “Some things in life are bad, They can really make you mad.” began Spoofer And out of nowhere, a tune that sounded very happy, a bit too happy in Crosby’s ears. “Other things just make you swear and curse” Spoofer just continued to sing “When you’re chewing on life’s gristle, don’t grumble, give a whistle!” By this point Crosby was getting really pissed off, to the point where he could almost smack Spoofer’s face in, but, he managed, barely. “And this’ll help things turn out for the best! And always look on the bri-” Crosby promptly just stopped listening, since he was still a bit pissed off about the giant spider joke, as Crosby just stood there and watched Spoofer sing and dance for at least two more minutes. Untill a very metalic object connected with his helmet. Crosby fell to his knees with out a sound, a bit dazed from the metallic object with four rotors on it that just rammed him. Chiro though were just laughing at Crosbys now very painful headache. “HAHA! KARMA!” Chiro exclaimed. “Thats what you get for leaving me with an eight-legged freak, on my eye.” Crosby was slowly being pushed towards the borderline of where he was in the mood to kill everyone and everything that was remotely five feet away. In fact, he was planing on shooting up Chiro first, but his thoughts had other plans. “Calm yo’ tits Crosby. It was a harmless prank and some Karma, so what? At least It isn’t that time when you got chased by 20 freaking terrorists in a tight ass urban area. Remember how that ended? A freaking head to the wall, a few flesh wounds, not to mention the RPG to the face. I mean seriously how did you survive that? And don’t forget the blunt trauma.” Crosbys head said to himself. And now that he mentions it how did he actually survive a RPG to the face? Well the answer is simple. Hes an NPC (Non-Playable Character) They are like freaking un-killable. Unless they have a scripted event where they die, then they are gone for good. But in this story, he’s the main character and then the question still stands how in the seven circles of hell did Crosby survive a RPG to the face? But that’s a story for another time. Now as Crosby was sitting there listening to the voices in his head. He got up and leaned against a conveniently placed tree that was close by, when he did that he still heard that Chiro was laughing and Spoofer just barely kept himself together. “The fuck is wrong with my head? And why does the voice in my head sound black instead of white? Last time I checked I was fairly sure that I was white.” Crosby thought as he pulled up a sleeve to check his forearm if he was black or not. And sure enough his arm was white. (A/N: No racism intended.) As Crosby was standing there trying to figure out why the voice in his head sounded black, he noticed something shiny on the road. It was round, a bit flat and gold. “Oh look a penny!” Crosby exclaimed as he got back down on his knees to pick up the newly found coin. “Uhh... I don’t think that’s a penny, I don’t remember them being that golden” Chiro said as he flew a bit closer toward Crosby. Spoofer also trotted up towards Crosby to see what he found. “Oh. Shut up Chiro! It’s a penny! I found it. I decide what it is ‘kay? ‘Kay.” Crosby said as he picked up and placed the shiny golden coin in his hands so he could look at it. As Crosby did that Spoofer looked in his hands and saw a golden coin. “Oh hey! You found a bit, congratulations one step closer to a fortune! Although.... YOINK” Spoofer said as he somehow stole the bit with one of his hooves. Just as Spoofer tucked away that bit, both Crosby and Chiro were staring at Spoofer. Crosby probably again would have lost his jaw again if it weren’t for the mask covering his face. As Chiro just hovered there trying to process what just happened. You could literally see the circuits in his robotic body lighting up trying to figure out how Spoofer could hold something with his hoof. “And now your back to square one!” Spoofer exclaimed having a huge grin on his face. Crosby then looked in his now empty hands then back to Spoofer, then again his hands, then Spoofer. “The fuck just happened?” Both Chiro and Crosby said in Unison. “What just happened?” Spoofer asked back, since well he had no idea what was going on. Both Crosby and Chiro just stared at Spoofer, who in turned just stared back at them. This just kept going for about 10 minutes, before Spoofer looked toward the sky and then said. “You know. We should get moving before it gets dark, otherwise we might freeze to death. Or get robbed, or something in that area.” “Uh.... Yeah, sure. Whatever” Crosby said still a bit brain dead on to how Spoofer could pick up something with his hoof. He then got up from his knees and looked at Chiro for a few minutes before asking him a question. “You okay there?” Crosby asked with a tiny bit of concern in his voice. “No? Okay lets try this!” Crosby then gave Chiro a light punch to the armor. For a few seconds it looked like Chiro was gonna crash again but, instead of crashing he stabilized and looked at Crosby. “Hey! Watch it! You are scraping the paint!” Chiro yelled. “Yeah yeah, lets get a move on! We have wasted enough time as it is.” Crosby said very impatient. “Alright. Lets go then, that way!” Crosby pointed from where they came from and started walking in that direction. “Ponyville is the other way” Spoofer said as he looked with a tilted head at Crosby. Crosby quickly turned around and said “I knew that.” Then continued there walk towards Ponyville. About 10 minutes of walking later. “Look I’m telling you, with a skilled pilot a ADS could take down a Battle tank!” Crosby said alittle bit annoyed. “There is no freaking way that those blocky and clumpy drones could take down a freaking Battle tank Crosby. Even with a skilled pilot I mean I’ve heard that those things handle like a drunk pigeon that stumbles around on the ground.” Chiro argued back as he was flying sideways looking Crosby in the face as they were arguing over if a ADS could destroy a Main Battle Tank or not. Spoofer though had absolutely no idea what they were talking about so he kept a look out for anything special. “Okay first of al-” “FOR THE HOARD!” Spoofer interupted Crosby and ran a bit forward then picking up another bit he found. He then noticed how Crosby and Chiro was staring at him. “What?” He smiled sheepishly. “I found another bit to add to my shiny hoard.” He explained afterwards. “Right anyways-” Crosby began and kept speaking with Chiro and arguing with him alot as they were walking down the road towards Ponyville. What they failed to notice was the rapidly closing village that was in the distance. As they argued away Spoofer actually found there arguing both welcome and funny to listen to since he had been traveling alone for a long time. Infact he joined in on some since they were talking about Equestria at one point. Right now he was focusing mostly on listening on the argument as they walked towards Ponyville, he had forgotten to say that they actually were arriving in Ponyville in a minutes. Infact they were closing on the village quick. Alittle bit to quick. As they got closer and closer the village seamed more like a Ghost village than a actuall village. they just kept arguing till they got to the park thats when Crosby desided to go infront of everyone else and walk backwards. “Look. The V-TOL Technolig-” Crosby got interupted as he tripped on something and falled in to a fountain causing a splash to happend. “Okay who the fuck thought it would be funny to put a fountain in my way?” Crosby asked as he still laid in the water, and as the fountian was spraying water on his helmet. “Although it isn’t that bad, its a pretty cool water.” He said afterwards. “Gentlemen, we just arrived in Ponyville.” Spoofer said with a french accent “Oh and flying metal thing too. We arrived in Ponyville” he said directly after. “I have a name you know” Chiro said annoyed. “I know but you called me abomination. Instead of asking my name or giving me one, so I'm restorting to calling to Flying metal thing.” Spoofer said. “What ever floats your boat.” Chiro said even more annoyed at the new name he got. “OH. MY. GOD! THE FOUNTAIN IS FILLED WITH PENNIES! AND THERE ALL MINE!” Crosby yelled on top of his lungs. “THEY ARE MINE! FOR THE HOARD!” Spoofer yelled as he joined in to the fray. After a few minutes of digging around the fountain the had found atleast 100 pennies as Crosby likes to call them, even though they are bits. I think they got very lucky or something since they found like a humongus amount of coins in a fountain. Crosby and Spoofer got out of the fountain and dryed them selfs. Spoofer then suggested that they count the coins and split it 50/50 but as they were standing there counting they failed to notice the pony that was coming from the other side of the town, it probably were some special day or something that had a gathering on the other side of town. Anyways as the pony laid eyes on Crosby and Chiro but ignoring Spoofer. It yelled with all its might “MONSTERS! WAAAH!!” Then it ran away. Crosby and Chiro who had no idea what just happened just stood and hovered there. “What just happened?” They both asked in Unison Too be continued If you are reading so to speak. A/N: Top hat for Spoofer anyone? Special thanks to; Pinkies imagination, RainbowBob for proof reading this heap of junk, Chiromishi (My good old buddy) for helping me edit, Slayerbroman for giving me ideas and YOU! For reading! A new dimension with a side dish of extra troubleChapter one: A new dimension with a side dish of extra trouble Now that Crosby and Chiro were stuck in an unknown void after being sucked in to the vortex, Crosby thought it would be fun to ask a question. "Hey want to play some cards? I've got a stack of playing cards with me" Crosby said as he opened a pocket and took out a stack of playing cards holding them up. "Yeah? And how the fuck do you think I’m supposed to play? I have no hands or arms, dumbass!" Chiro replied furiously. "Woah dude, calm down! What the fuck is you're problem?" Crosby asked. "Problem? My Problem?! What do you think it is?! IN CASE YOU HAVEN'T NOTICED WE ARE STUCK IN A FUCKING VOID YOU JACKASS! WE MIGHT BE STUCK HERE FOR ALL OF FUCKING ETERNITY!" Chiro screamed making it echo all around them, Crosby looked around them and saw in fact that they were floating in a void. “YEAH SO WHAT?! YOU WERE THE ONE WHO WANTED TO PUSH THAT DAMN BUTTON ANYWAYS! IF YOU DIDN’T WANTED TO PRESS IT WE WOULDN’T BE HERE NOW WOULD WE?! " Crosby shouted back. Chiro glared at him very quietly, thinking about ways to kill Crosby and get away with it, not to mention that they were in a void. A few minutes passed before Crosby spoke up. "Sooo, what do we do now? Tell stories?" Crosby asked Chiro, who replied "Actually, that’s the second best idea I've heard today. Alright you will start by telling a story, then its my turn." "Okay, so this one time when I was out hunting with the boys..." Crosby started and trailed off. Meanwhile In Equestria, it was a normal day. Nothing really special was going on today, just your normal day to day activities was happening. Like the pegasi who cleared the skies from stray clouds, earth ponies that were on there farms doing farming business, which i shouldn’t get in to or bad things are going to happen. Then we have those snobby unicorns who live in Canterlot although not all unicorns are snobby there are some exceptions. But today, on this normal day in Equestria down a lonely stray dirt path leading to absolutely nowhere. Well it might lead somewhere... On this untouched dirt path, there was a lonely pony, who was walking this path. This lonely pony had been walking on this path for about three days. And he was called the Lonely wandering pony, since he wanders all over Equestria, preferably alone. There are some cases he had some companions to join him as he wandered all over Equestria, one of these companions was Flawkes, who sadly passed away a short time ago from a sickness he had. Another companion he had was ‘Courier 27’, who forgot his own name like Crosby has. Those two were had considered themselves “Bros”, because of the things they’ve done together. Sadly they had to part ways when the Courier got a job that had him move to the Frozen North, leaving the wandering pony all alone again. As the lone pony trotted down the dirt path, the sun shone down on his ash gray fur. His spiked cobalt blue mane slightly swayed in the breeze. As he looked up at the sky, he noticed that there were no clouds today. That made him think of a song he heard that was called “Mr.Blue Sky.” He started to hum the merry tune and slowly started to sing the lyrics in his head. “Sun is shinin' in the sky There ain't a cloud in sight It's stopped rainin' ev'rybody's in a play And don't you know It's a beautiful new day hey,hey” As he trotted down the road he started to hear a light hum in the air above him. At first he ignored it, but as he kept trotting down the dirt path the hum slowly got louder. Soon it started to sound like something beginning to tear, like a knife to a fabric. At first he looked around to see where it came from, then he felt the air pressure was off for this beautiful day. It felt like he was in the desert, even though he was out on a breezy plain with a dirt path on it. It became harder to breath for him as the area started to get brighter and brighter.Then all of sudden lightning shot out from nowhere, and knocked him back a few feet away. A flash of light then blinded him momentarily. A few minutes before “And then his head was all like ‘PTHBHBTB’ when he pulled the trigger! Hahahaha! ” Crosby laughed as his tale came to a end. It echoed all around them as he laughed. “You are one sick human being.” Chiro replied trying to look disgusted, but since he’s a drone he had no face to do so. “Heh, yeah guess I’m pretty fucked up. Want to hear what happened when I found a RPG and pointed it towards a bunch of terr- ?” “NO.” Chiro interrupted “Aww come on! It will be a blast! Literally...Hey did it get hot in here?” Crosby said as he adjusted the collar of his uniform. The area around him began to glow brighter until neither of them could see clearly. “I cant feel any difference remember? I’m still a freakin’ drone you dimwit.” Chiro replied. “AW FUCK MY EYES! Chiro! Why did you turn on your flashlight?! ” He shouted as the suddenly felt something close to being shoved into a pool, he felt like he was falling for a few seconds before he hit some thing very hard. “Aggh... fuck that hurt” groaned Crosby as he rolled around in pain. Crosby then heard some distant metal hitting the ground “Chiro was that you hitting the ground?” Crosby asked and hoped it was Chiro since if it was some sort of monster or transformer he would be fucked because of his temporal blindness. Not that he could kill a transformer since they are like huge robots who transform in to vehicles and have super advanced weaponry. “No, it was some other drone, Of course it was me you... I can’t believe it, during the last 20 minutes, I’ve run out of things to call you... Can you see any thing? Because my optical receptor are still adjusting to the light.” Chiro both said and asked. “No.... But I hear something...” Crosby said back and started to listen in to the sound that was coming from all around him. At first it was just a breeze, then it sounded like birds, and finally an unknown groan. Back to the present and the pony The pony sat up groaning the entire time, rubbing his head to get rid of the oncoming headache. He looked around for the unknown source that knocked him back, blinded him, and shot lighting everywhere. His gaze came to a stop when his eyes fell upon a strange creature covered in what seemed like some cloth with weird metal objects on it. Next to him was a small metallic device that appeared to be sitting next to it. They appeared to be arguing about something. Back to the human and drone “What do you mean we are no longer on earth?” Crosby asked Chiro. “How should I put it? We no longer are on earth, because I can’t detect the Internet?” “So wait... You are telling me that this planet has no Internet nor satellites?” Crosby said. “Yeah...” “NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Crosby yelled as he imitated Darth Vader. “I’m gonna miss all the senseless violence that comes from the Internet now!” Crosby quietly sobbed as he said that. “It has been the only thing keeping me sane! Though I'm also gonna miss the GPS tracking... Gon’ be so hard to find my way around things now ” “Well then.... At least the government won’t track us now! We are free! You hear me?! FREE!” Chiro says as he started up his rotors. “Thats ‘Murica for you.” Crosby said as he tried to stand up but was stopped by a huge headache. ‘Ouch... This feels worse than when I ran headfirst in to a brick wall, stupid alleyways’ he thought as he sat back down. “I believe I broke my non-talk quota today, but then again, who gives a solid fuck?” Crosby said to no-one in particular. “Well for one I don't give a single crap about you, because I don’t have any bowels.” Chiro said to Crosby as he hovered over to his face. “Ouch, right in the feels.” Crosby replied a bit disheartened, holding a hand over where his heart would be. Crosby then looked down, and noticed that he was sitting on a dirt path. He then heard a small gulp coming from his right, both him and Chiro looked to the right and saw something that made them both scream like little girls. At least Crosby did because he saw a small spider on the dirt road. “OH MY GOD! A SPIDER! AAAIIIEE!” Crosby screamed flying back a few feet. But unbeknowst to Crosby his little outburst didn’t get noticed by Chiro since his optical receptor was strained on one confused looking pony. Who was sitting there all alone and confused. A few moments of silence passed as both Chiro and The pony stared at each other, until Chiro had a small mental breakdown trying to analyze the thing that was sitting in front of him, all whilst the pony in front of him was almost terrified of what would happen to him if the two creatures tried to attack him. “What are you!? ABOMINATION!?” Chiro yelled at the pony, pointing his machine gun at it. As the pony tries to respond, Chiro shoots around it trying to hit it, but ends up miserably failing in the process. “God dammit, my stabilizers are down... This’ll take awhile to repair, mind holding still for 20 minutes as I repair these suckers?” As Chiro opened fire on the poor lone pony, Crosby was snapped out of his “Little school girl that’s super scared of spiders” trance when he saw that Chiro was shooting something, so he skipped over the the small spider and walked over to Chiro as he was talking to an unknown creature, saying something about holding still while he repairs something. “What are you shooting at?” Crosby asked Chiro as he walked up to him. “THAT ABOMINATION!” Chiro said without taking his optical receptor off the pony. Crosby looked the same way that Chiro was facing, and found out that there was a sitting pony there or well “miniature horse” in Crosby’s brain. “Abomination? What are you insane? That thing is adorable!” Crosby said gesturing towards the pony. “Adorable my metallic exhaust pipe, that thing is an abomination!” Chiro said still looking at the pony. As those two kept arguing over if the pony was adorable or not, the pony decided to try to sneak away, since during the heat of the argument Chiro decided to face Crosby instead and yell at him. But just when the pony thought he was safe enough to actually run away, he heard, “Hey! Where the fuck is he going?” from a metallic sounding voice. The pony froze in fear as he heard that voice, he thought about running away, but wasn’t sure what the other creature would do. As the whirring got closer he laid down and covered his head with his hooves. “Look you scared the poor thing!” Crosby said to Chiro. “IT STILL A FUCKING ABOMINATION! It must be purged with holy bullets and 40mm Grenades!” Chiro replied with malice in his electronic voice. Crosby shook his head and walked up to the small cowering pony. “I agree that it might be a abomination in adorableness, but come on! It has so much adorableness its almost cute!” Crosby said as he almost leaped with joy, but managed to restrain him self. “Yeah, yeah it’s sweet enough to cause a heart attack. NOW LET ME KILL IT.” Chiro said and flying closer towards the pony “More like cause ‘One look then instant diabeetus’ than heart attack” Crosby thought. “How the fuck can you tell if something is sweet? You don’t have any taste buds... Or a mouth for that matter.” Crosby replied. “I understand the concept of the taste ‘sweet’ since I for one knows how to think compared to you.” Chiro said. “Touché flying robot of death. ” Crosby mumbled. Then he looked back at the small mammal next to him, that was still shaking in fear. He began to look over the small animal, checking for any type of identification of who could be the owner of it. Crosby looked around for awhile, but couldn’t find anything.”I hope it has a good nose, ‘cause I’m gonna ask where its house is.” he thought. Crosby then proceeded crouch down in front of and stared right in to the pony’s eyes. He silently thanked god for his one-way sunglasses which made this whole day just a little more easier to stand. He also noticed that the pony’s eyes were huge. “Those eyes kinda make you wonder how big their brain is...” Crosby thought as he kept looking at them. He kept looking at them for awhile before remembering what he was gonna do, to ask if the pony had a owner and hope for a answer Little did Crosby know that the pony could actually talk. “Hey there little fella, are you lost? If that’s the case, maybe me and my flying friend here could help you find you’re way home.” Crosby asked with a tiny bit of concern in his voice. “THERE IS NO. FUCKING. WAY. I’M HELPING THAT ABOMINATION!” Chiro screamed scaring away a few nearby birds. “Quiet, you fool!” Crosby said in a raspy voice he never knew existed “The fuck was that?” he thought afterwards. “The fuck was that?” Chiro asked Crosby. “I just asked my self the same thing a few seconds ago.” Crosby replied “I-If I may...” A unknown voice said. “Who said that?” Chiro asked Crosby, who then replied with a shrug. Chiro quickly scanned the area to find who said something, but found that only Crosby, him and the pony were the only ones around. As Chiro frantically looked around as the pony sat up and looked Crosby in the eyes then said, “I did.” in a very confident voice. Crosby could have sworn that his jaw crashed right through the planet. He just kept staring at the pony for a few moments before facing Chiro and saying, “It.....Spoke.” “What?” Chiro asked with a bit of confusion. “It.... Spoke....” He repeated. “Ooookay. What spoke?” “The pony.” Crosby answered Chiro. “It did?”Chiro said with a voice filled with laughter that was barely suppressed. “As a matter of fact, I did” The pony answered Chiro. Just as the pony finished speaking, Chiro had a power outage in one of his circuits and lost power to port-side rotors and did a barrel roll into the ground whilst playing up a sound from 1997 that screamed “Do a barrel roll!” from his built in speakers. “What did i tell you about that thing! IT’S AN ABOMINATION! IT DESERVES TO BE KILLED!” Chiro yelled as he crashed. Crosby only looked at Chiro then shook his head and said. “No need to kill civvies” Crosby said with no emotion in his voice. “No need to kill them... Yet.... The only thing i find weird is here, is that the pony talks in perfect English....” He thought and then Crosby had a great idea. “If he talks English, then his buddies must talk English too, so if I ask his name I might get...” he thought. “Hey whats your name pony guy?” Crosby asked. “It’s -” “Im going to call you SpooferMcSpoofington!” Crosby said proudly. “Every freaking time...” SpooferMcSpoofington thought to him self. “What? but I already have a name!” SpooferMcSpoofington protested. “Yes, and It’s SpooferMcSpoofington! Now where were you headed?” Crosby asked. “No where in particular, this road goes to some small town called ‘Ponyville’ I thought I might check it out since I’ve never been there.” SpooferMcSpoofington said “TOO PONY- WHAT EVER IT WAS CALLED!” Crosby roared with vigor. “Ville” SpooferMcSpoofington corrected Crosby “TOO PONTY-VILLE!” Crosby roared again “Pony.” SpooferMcSpoofington corrected Crosby again. “TOO WHATEVER HE SAID!” Crosby roared for the third time “NOW, ONWARD TOWARDS ADVENTURE!” And with that Both SpooferMcSpoofington and Crosby set out on the path towards Ponyville. “Whatever I can live with the new name anyways. I’m just glad I got company again, it was getting kinda lonely, just got to ask though. Why SpooferMcSpoofington?” SpooferMcSpoofington asked Crosby. “Its Spoofer now.” Crosby replied “What?” Spoofer asked, but never got a answer leaving him confused as they set off into the horizon. “Ummm guys? Where are you going? Guys? HEY GUYS!? THIS ISN’T FUNNY! I KNOW I SAID SOME THINGS, I DIDN’T MEAN ANY OF IT! COME BAAAACK!” Chiro shouted towards nobody in particular. “Oh god! The spider... Its getting closer!” Chiro shouted again. “Shoo! Shoo! Get away you eight-legged freak! OH GOD NO, NO! DON’T CLIMB ON MY OPTICAL RECEPTOR! IT IS SENSITIVE TO HAIRY LEGS! NOOOO!” Chiro half-shouted and Half-sobbed. “Hey do you feel like we are forgetting something?” Spoofer asked Crosby. “Hmmm..... NAH!” Crosby replied as he kept walking with Spoofer and ignoring the screams he heard. To be continued... IN THE NEXT EPISODE OF DRAGON BALL... Oh wait wrong fiction. A/N: SpooferMcSpoofington is just a random name that Chiro called me once, decided to make that in to a OC. Btw should I give Spoofer a tophat? Tell me in the comments. And again, thanks for reading! Love you all! (No homo I guess?) Special thanks. RainbowBob and Pinkies imagination for proof reading this heap of junk Chiromishi (My good ol' buddy) for editing. And Slayerbroman, for giving me some ideas. And of course YOU! For reading this fiction!
There is a lab here?Prologue: There is a lab here? The U.S.S. Barack Obama, aircraft carrier. On this ship there is a soldier by the name of Crosby. No one knows his full name since he mostly keeps it to himself. To be honest, Crosby himself forgot his own name after a while so he just stuck with it. He's normally a quiet guy, but today he was whistling a tune while walking with his gear on through the hallways of the Obama. Normally when Crosby is bored, he would watch Harper and Mason fight each other in the ring, but today he felt like taking a stroll throughout the Obama. As he walked down the dull corridors of the aircraft carrier he got lost deep in thought. "Maybe I should go down to the range and practice my marksmanship..." Crosby thought as he walked past the food court. He stopped quickly and looked back. "I could get some grub too," he pondered, but ignored his stomach and continued on his path to the unknown. He just kept walking and thinking about irrelevant things like how a A.D.S worked, or how they got control over C.L.A.W.'s but, he mostly thought about his special Quadrotor he had been working on for the last few week's. The Quad-rotor actually just needed to be repaired since it had some malfunctions somewhere. Currently Crosby had forgotten what happened to it in the first place; in fact he didn't even get told by the drone inspector. He just came up to him and said "Fix this," while pointing at the Quadrotor. Many don't know that when it comes to drones Crosby is a genius. In fact, it was him who rigged a flamethrower on a C.L.A.W. unit before. That C.L.A.W. unit was used by Section, Harper and Salazar in Pakistan. After they came home from the mission they told Crosby that the flamethrower worked perfectly against Menedez lackeys. He was trying to attach a rocket pod from an A.D.S that had been malfunctioning on to the Quadrotor he was repairing. It slowly but steadily became a project he continued to work on, since it was a major trial and error of attaching the rocket pod somewhere on the Quadrotor without it becoming too heavy for sustainable flight. Crosby thought about making the rotors have a higher RPM, but that wouldn't help since he also reinforced the armor on "MQ-28 Guardian" as he called his project, and it would probably end up overloading the electronics inside the drone. As he was wondering about where to place the rocket pod, he walked past the war room where Commander Section was instructing some other soldiers about an operation they were planning. Crosby kept trekking for a grand five minutes until he bumped in to another soldier, which caused him to fall down flat on his ass. "Hey man! Watch where you're goin'!" the soldier shouted. "H-huh? Oh... Uh sorry man." Crosby muttered, as he was snapped out of his thoughts. He then proceeded to hold out a hand to pull up the other soldier. The soldier happily took Crosby's hand and got pulled to his feet then said "Just watch were you're goin', wouldn't be to fun if you bumped in to Admiral Briggs and knocked him down... Uh, I have to go I'm late for a briefing, catch you later man." and with that said he turned around and started to jog down the hallway. This made Crosby extremely confused, namely because he had been walking around deep in thought and hadn't noticed where he was, he quickly looked around for any sign or map that would show him where he was and found one on the ceiling that said "Barracks." Now that he knew where he was, he looked for a door that said "Crosby" on it, and when he found it, he opened the door and went inside his room. When he entered, he made his way over to his desk and picked up his phone which was filled with all sorts of Intel and information, plus a few nude pictures here and there. But mostly music, like for example; Skrillex, Deadmau5, Justin bei- I mean Sabaton and Hammerfall. Oh and also Scorpions because they are awesome like that. He sat down at his desk and searched in a drawer for the headphones, but only found boring documents. He continued to rummaged around in the drawer until he decided to just empty it all over the floor. As the documents lay spread out, he noticed a ring and a few other items that caught his eye. First thing was a note that said "I.O.U a good one hundred bucks // Mike." Second was the pistol he had hidden in the drawer. He picked up the note and examined it for awhile while thinking where the fuck Harper could find one hundred dollars. Crosby was pretty sure he was broke, he put the note in his pocket for now, and same with his phone. Then he inspected the pistol that was lying on the floor, a Tac-45 complete with one mag and a bullet in the chamber. Crosby thought about why he kept the Tac-45 there and always came back to the same thing "In case of emergency", which was the only valid reason. He picked up the pistol to inspect it further but found that his headphones was under it, so he put the pistol in his holster and picked up his headphones. He then took out his phone and plugged in his headphones, then put them on his selected tunes. Now that his small task of finding his headset was done, he stood up from the chair and avoided the mess on the floor thinking "I'll clean it up later". He walked out of his room closing the door and then looked around the corridor, Crosby noted that it was really empty in the corridor... Almost too empty, he quickly went to the nearest corner and checked if someone was there. "Not a single living thing in sight, except that fly over there on the wall" Crosby thought as he peeked around the corner, he then checked his phone for the time and saw that it was 11:50 AM, meaning that every one was probably at the food court eating. Crosby facepalmed for being so paranoid, but who could blame him? Being a J-SOC soldier causes you to become paranoid when things get a bit too quiet. Crosby then shook his head and continued on his stroll until someone decided to either find or radio him if he was needed. After about twenty minutes of aimlessly wandering, Crosby found him self in a section of the Obama he never had entered before. In fact, he didn't even know this part of the ship existed until now. This part of the Obama was called the Labs. "Sounds ominous" he thought as he entered the mysterious section of the ship. The first thing he noticed was that the walls were much whiter than usual; secondly was that the corridor he was in was empty, "The geeks must be eating." Crosby thought as he started to trudge through a corridor, but then stopped in front of a door and looked above it read a sign. "Bio-warfare" it said, "Nope I ain't going inside there unless i want to get a virus and die horribly or be sterile for life." he thought almost sprinting away from the door. As he hightailed the corridors of The Lab section, he found another door that caught his eye, "Cyber-warfare" the sign said beside the door. "Oooh, high tech stuff." Crosby said out loud as he entered the room. The first thing that caught his eye was the HUMONGOUS screen on the far side of the room, then we have all the holographic displays everywhere. Some contained new schematics for drones, others contained info. They're nothing super special here, so he just kept walking looking through a few computers before finding one folder that made him laugh a lot. The folders name was "Hentai", on someones user named William. Crosby had no idea who it was but he certainly was going to rub it in his face when he got the chance. Crosby ceased messing around with the computers and started to see if there was anything more appealing in the room, but found nothing of interest. So he left the room and carried on until he marched past an unmarked door, at first he ignored it, but as he kept walking he had this nagging feeling in the back of his head. Telling him to turn around and check and Crosby being the curious type, he gave in to the suspicion as he turned around and marched towards the unmarked door. At first he just tried to open it but found out that it was locked, he then tried to ram it open only to fall on the floor groaning with a pain. "Son of a bitch that hurt," Crosby said through gritted teeth, he noticed the retinal scanner beside the door. He mentally slapped himself for not looking for something that could open the door. He stood up and stared at the retinal scanner for a few minutes, then checked the clock, which read 1:30 PM. "Still got thirty minutes before anyone arrives." then Crosby looked at the scanner, tilting his head a bit. "Why would they need a retinal scanner for an unmarked door...?" "Well, here goes nothing, but I swear to God if this thing sets off an alarm I'm jumping overboard..." he leaned in towards the retina scanner and it scanned his eye in a flash of red light, then the unexpected happened, "Retina access confirmed, Welcome Crosby." a mechanical voice said, and with that the door opened up. Crosby being dumbfounded as to why he had access to this part of the lab since well, hes not scientist, a genius, or a geek for that matter. He's just your run of the mill soldier, nothing more, nothing less. But to suddenly have access to what he assumed was a top secret lab is quite mind boggling when you're just a soldier. What he first saw when he stepped in the room were unknown equipment, lots of weapon caches and equipment crates. Crosby walked over to a weapon case and opened it and saw an FAL OSW with a Millimeter scanner, Fore grip, Adjustable stock, Laser sight, and a Silencer, it also had armor piercing bullets. What didn't make any sense to him was the fire mode on it that said Laser mode. "maybe it could shoot lasers, or maybe not, whatever it does it Doesn't matter." he thought as he picked it up and flung it over his shoulder. Next he went over to an equipment crate that had a huge text that said PROTOTYPE, which translated to Crosby into "Open me!". Crosby thought about it for a few seconds before deciding to open it and found a Quadrotor with a attached grenade launcher, reinforced plating and a "Smart" A.I Implanted in it. There was a note that said "The Quadrotors name is Chiro, take good care of him!" Crosby examined the note, then glanced at the Quadrotor and against his better judgement he decided to start it up. The Quadrotor sprung to life flying up a few inches in the air before rotating around a few times. "Oooh, that was a good nap." Chiro said, his robotic voice making a few beeps as it awakened. The Quadrotor's paint looked very worn and had a few dents and scratches on the armor plating. Crosby, still quiet, stared at the machine, and if not for his mask covering his face his jaw might have dropped to the floor, Chiro stared at the wall oblivious to the fact that Crosby was looking at him. "Where am I?" Chiro said out loud while rotating around, and saw that Crosby eyeballing at him. Crosby didn't move a muscle, as the Quadrotor rotated to face him but when it just stopped to stare at him, no reaction came until a few moments later when he got a yell coming from the Quadrotor. "AAAAAH!" It screeched while flying backwards, straight into the wall, hitting a switch which caused a door to open up behind some crates. "Don't scare me like that!" Chiro yelled. "Sorry, didn't mean to," Crosby answered as he then looked to the left of him and saw that a doorway that appeared out of no where. "Was that doorway there before?" he asked Chiro. "No... At least I think not, I mean, I just woke up with no idea where I am." Chiro responded. "True" Crosby thought then proceeded to walk through the newly appeared doorway, as he stepped through the doorway he looked around and saw that the room was filled a lot of monitors, computers and holographic displays every where. Crosby went deeper into the room and towards a computer and looked what was going on. "Hey buddy! Wait for me!" Chiro shouted whilst flying after Crosby. Crosby only found a document about trans-dimensional space travel on the computer, and something about creating a portal to another universe, and all that was in a chamber at the other end of this room. Most of it was top secret so he couldn't get much information from the document on the computer. "Wha'cha looking at?" Chiro asked while he slowly flew around the room. "Some weird-ass top secret document about Inter-universal space travel. Heh, can you believe that shit? I mean, they were obviously high when they came up with the idea, but to actually try to create a portal... Come on, that wouldn't be possible," Crosby ranted. Chiro just remained quiet and looked at the door on the far side of the room, he then flew towards the chamber, and hovered in front of it. "Hey look! There is a pedestal in there, with a red SHINY button on it!" Chiro said sounding very excited. "Huh? There is a door there?" Crosby said confused, totally forgetting the document he read on the computer just a few seconds ago, Crosby got up from the chair and walked over to Chiro and saw a glass door, inside of the room was a few lights of some sort and a black pedestal with a holographic screen on it with a over-sized red button. "It's looks like its formed like a hexagon..." Crosby thought. "Might as well try to get in now" Crosby tried to open the door, only to find that the door was locked. When he checked why he saw that there was a keypad that needed a code. Crosby didn't know the code even though he just read it like one minute ago, I mean come on! He has less memory span than a goldfish sometimes. "Do you know the combination?" Chiro asked Crosby who just replied with a shrug. "Great... Now I'll never get to press that SHINY red button." "You know you could just hack it right? I mean you are a drone right?" Crosby asked. "What do I look like? A hacking drone? I'm a freaking combat drone, you jackass! See this!?" Chiro replied irritated, waving around the grenade launcher. Crosby just sighed and looked at the keypad, for a few moments, he thought up a valid sounding combination and decided to try it out. "One, one, one ... err... One?" he said as he pressed one four times in a row, Chiro just scoffed at Crosby's stupidity, but to his surprise, the keypad lit up in a green light and unlocked the door. "Can't believe that worked." Chiro said. "Me neither... But I totally knew the combination." Crosby agreed, as they walked and hovered in to the room Crosby looked around to see that the room was in fact shaped as a hexagon. When they got to the pedestal in the middle of the room he looked at the screen and this is what he saw on the holographic display. T-DPCP // Trans-Dimensional Portal Control Pedestal. User : Anonymus Mode Manual. Please choose destination. Or Shuffle destination. (Not recommended, Seriously don't even think about pressing that Shuffle button.) There was a "Shuffle" option on the Pedestal and since Crosby didn't know smack he just pressed the button and hoped for the best. But what he forgot to read when he pressed the button was "Shuffle mode is extremely unstable use at own risk!" but since Crosby never reads notifications cause he's so lazy, this is gonna come back and bite him in the ass. Now the screen was updated and it read. T-DPCP // Trans-Dimensional Portal Control Pedestal. User : Anonymus Mode Shuffle. Selecting destination please wait. Done... Destination #4331 Calculating distance's betwen universes. Please hold. Done... Error: Could not calculate. Loading fail-safes... Error: 404 not found. Hit the button when ready. Now all he had to do was to hit the comedicly oversized red button and begin his journey to the unknown universe that was planned for him... But for once in his whole life he hesitated. Crosby didn't know why, he just had a terrible feeling of something bad happing. But he just pushed down the feeling back to its cage and chained it up again, then he read a text just above the giant red button "Do. Not. Touch. Button. Or actually do whatever you want. Im just a text, Not a cop." just when he read that, this song came on on his phone and blasted his ears with music. It made resisting to press the button even harder. Since the lyrics of the song wanted him to try it out. He was not really sure if he wanted to try it out, as his hand hovered over the button he waited for the drop to come. And when it did, he almost punched the button so hard it got stuck. All while Chiro was surprisingly quiet. Nothing happened for a few seconds until roof opened up some hatches in the corner of the room and extended out some coils of some sort quite shortly after beams shot into the middle of the room causing an unusual vortex to open up. It was black, portal shaped and sucking Crosby and Chiro into it. "HOLY FUU-" Chiro screamed, as he got sucked right in "THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!" Chiro yelled from inside the vortex Crosby quickly grabbed onto the pedestal, but the force of the vortex is overwhelming, Crosby's grip was slowly failing him. "I haven't seen anything suck this much since... I HEART HUCKABEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE'S!" He yelled as he lost his grip and got sucked in the vortex. The vortex then closed it self just leaving a scorch mark on the floor, and lots of power fluctuations across the ship. To be continued... A/N : If you still need some extra information on Black Ops, these links may help. Thank you for reading! Proof-read by Pinkies imagination and RainbowBob Edited by Chiromishi (My good old buddy) Crosby (main char) The FAL OSW TAC-45 MQ-27 "Dragonfire" Or Quadrotor CLAW unit A.G.R. Or ADS as its called ingame
The Small Walk of WalkinessA/N: One might ask: Who in the seven hells is Spoofer? And who the fuck is Crosby? The answer is simple - You would’ve known, had you clicked the damned wikipedia links and read the previous chapter, but as a matter of fact - no one did. So I’ll answer it for you. The answer is - They’re imaginary. The manifestation of some kind of gorilla fucking alcoholic. Fractions of one’s imagination, brought to life by sparkly magic-ish magic, that only exists in the seventh plane of torment - EQUESTRIA, or something in that general direction. Chapter 2: The Small Walk of Walkiness After a few minutes of walking, Crosby, who was deep in thought, was thinking of the buzzing sound that was missing. At first he thought that Chiro was just hanging behind, but after a few minutes, he didn’t hear that continued low-hum buzzing that he usually heard from Chiro. Albeit he only knew him for 30 minutes or so, but who cares about that. As they kept walking, Crosby thought that Chiro might have a stealth mode and entered it. So he thought that he might just give him a question. “Hey Chiro, do you have a Stealth mode?” Crosby asked. He waited a few minutes but was never given an answer. “Heeeelloo Chirooo, anybody home?” Crosby asked again. “Now where the fuck is he? Did he fly off? Unless.... Did i forget him back there?” He thought as he stopped dead in his tracks and looked around for his Quadrotor friend but as he found none he just turned around and stared at the way that he and Spoofer came from. Spoofer noticed how Crosby stopped and looked around. He was a bit confused why he was looking around so he stopped him self and thought of a small clever prank. “Whats wrong? Saw a giant frost spider?” Spoofer asked his voice was dipped in mirth and he could barely contain his laughter. “No I’m just looking fo- Wait what?” Crosby asked extremely nervous, Crosby then got extremely tense and started to look around. “Y-You got Giant S-S-Spiders??” Crosby stammered out. Spoofer couldn’t hold his laughter any more. He collapsed and rolled around on the ground with laughter. Crosby was just looking at Spoofer with pretty much the facial expression that said “are you fucking kidding me?” but thanks to his mask covering his face he did not really get the point across. So he had to verbally express himself. “Are you fucking kidding me?” Crosby asked, being a bit annoyed by Spoofer’s shenanigans. After a few minutes Spoofer gradually calmed down to the level where he could speak without laughter getting in the way. “Oh cheer up, Brian! it was a harmless joke. You know what they say.” Spoofer after he calmed down. “My name isn’t Brian...” Crosby said in his defense, clearly not understanding the joke. “Some things in life are bad, They can really make you mad.” began Spoofer And out of nowhere, a tune that sounded very happy, a bit too happy in Crosby’s ears. “Other things just make you swear and curse” Spoofer just continued to sing “When you’re chewing on life’s gristle, don’t grumble, give a whistle!” By this point Crosby was getting really pissed off, to the point where he could almost smack Spoofer’s face in, but, he managed, barely. “And this’ll help things turn out for the best! And always look on the bri-” Crosby promptly just stopped listening, since he was still a bit pissed off about the giant spider joke, as Crosby just stood there and watched Spoofer sing and dance for at least two more minutes. Untill a very metalic object connected with his helmet. Crosby fell to his knees with out a sound, a bit dazed from the metallic object with four rotors on it that just rammed him. Chiro though were just laughing at Crosbys now very painful headache. “HAHA! KARMA!” Chiro exclaimed. “Thats what you get for leaving me with an eight-legged freak, on my eye.” Crosby was slowly being pushed towards the borderline of where he was in the mood to kill everyone and everything that was remotely five feet away. In fact, he was planing on shooting up Chiro first, but his thoughts had other plans. “Calm yo’ tits Crosby. It was a harmless prank and some Karma, so what? At least It isn’t that time when you got chased by 20 freaking terrorists in a tight ass urban area. Remember how that ended? A freaking head to the wall, a few flesh wounds, not to mention the RPG to the face. I mean seriously how did you survive that? And don’t forget the blunt trauma.” Crosbys head said to himself. And now that he mentions it how did he actually survive a RPG to the face? Well the answer is simple. Hes an NPC (Non-Playable Character) They are like freaking un-killable. Unless they have a scripted event where they die, then they are gone for good. But in this story, he’s the main character and then the question still stands how in the seven circles of hell did Crosby survive a RPG to the face? But that’s a story for another time. Now as Crosby was sitting there listening to the voices in his head. He got up and leaned against a conveniently placed tree that was close by, when he did that he still heard that Chiro was laughing and Spoofer just barely kept himself together. “The fuck is wrong with my head? And why does the voice in my head sound black instead of white? Last time I checked I was fairly sure that I was white.” Crosby thought as he pulled up a sleeve to check his forearm if he was black or not. And sure enough his arm was white. (A/N: No racism intended.) As Crosby was standing there trying to figure out why the voice in his head sounded black, he noticed something shiny on the road. It was round, a bit flat and gold. “Oh look a penny!” Crosby exclaimed as he got back down on his knees to pick up the newly found coin. “Uhh... I don’t think that’s a penny, I don’t remember them being that golden” Chiro said as he flew a bit closer toward Crosby. Spoofer also trotted up towards Crosby to see what he found. “Oh. Shut up Chiro! It’s a penny! I found it. I decide what it is ‘kay? ‘Kay.” Crosby said as he picked up and placed the shiny golden coin in his hands so he could look at it. As Crosby did that Spoofer looked in his hands and saw a golden coin. “Oh hey! You found a bit, congratulations one step closer to a fortune! Although.... YOINK” Spoofer said as he somehow stole the bit with one of his hooves. Just as Spoofer tucked away that bit, both Crosby and Chiro were staring at Spoofer. Crosby probably again would have lost his jaw again if it weren’t for the mask covering his face. As Chiro just hovered there trying to process what just happened. You could literally see the circuits in his robotic body lighting up trying to figure out how Spoofer could hold something with his hoof. “And now your back to square one!” Spoofer exclaimed having a huge grin on his face. Crosby then looked in his now empty hands then back to Spoofer, then again his hands, then Spoofer. “The fuck just happened?” Both Chiro and Crosby said in Unison. “What just happened?” Spoofer asked back, since well he had no idea what was going on. Both Crosby and Chiro just stared at Spoofer, who in turned just stared back at them. This just kept going for about 10 minutes, before Spoofer looked toward the sky and then said. “You know. We should get moving before it gets dark, otherwise we might freeze to death. Or get robbed, or something in that area.” “Uh.... Yeah, sure. Whatever” Crosby said still a bit brain dead on to how Spoofer could pick up something with his hoof. He then got up from his knees and looked at Chiro for a few minutes before asking him a question. “You okay there?” Crosby asked with a tiny bit of concern in his voice. “No? Okay lets try this!” Crosby then gave Chiro a light punch to the armor. For a few seconds it looked like Chiro was gonna crash again but, instead of crashing he stabilized and looked at Crosby. “Hey! Watch it! You are scraping the paint!” Chiro yelled. “Yeah yeah, lets get a move on! We have wasted enough time as it is.” Crosby said very impatient. “Alright. Lets go then, that way!” Crosby pointed from where they came from and started walking in that direction. “Ponyville is the other way” Spoofer said as he looked with a tilted head at Crosby. Crosby quickly turned around and said “I knew that.” Then continued there walk towards Ponyville. About 10 minutes of walking later. “Look I’m telling you, with a skilled pilot a ADS could take down a Battle tank!” Crosby said alittle bit annoyed. “There is no freaking way that those blocky and clumpy drones could take down a freaking Battle tank Crosby. Even with a skilled pilot I mean I’ve heard that those things handle like a drunk pigeon that stumbles around on the ground.” Chiro argued back as he was flying sideways looking Crosby in the face as they were arguing over if a ADS could destroy a Main Battle Tank or not. Spoofer though had absolutely no idea what they were talking about so he kept a look out for anything special. “Okay first of al-” “FOR THE HOARD!” Spoofer interupted Crosby and ran a bit forward then picking up another bit he found. He then noticed how Crosby and Chiro was staring at him. “What?” He smiled sheepishly. “I found another bit to add to my shiny hoard.” He explained afterwards. “Right anyways-” Crosby began and kept speaking with Chiro and arguing with him alot as they were walking down the road towards Ponyville. What they failed to notice was the rapidly closing village that was in the distance. As they argued away Spoofer actually found there arguing both welcome and funny to listen to since he had been traveling alone for a long time. Infact he joined in on some since they were talking about Equestria at one point. Right now he was focusing mostly on listening on the argument as they walked towards Ponyville, he had forgotten to say that they actually were arriving in Ponyville in a minutes. Infact they were closing on the village quick. Alittle bit to quick. As they got closer and closer the village seamed more like a Ghost village than a actuall village. they just kept arguing till they got to the park thats when Crosby desided to go infront of everyone else and walk backwards. “Look. The V-TOL Technolig-” Crosby got interupted as he tripped on something and falled in to a fountain causing a splash to happend. “Okay who the fuck thought it would be funny to put a fountain in my way?” Crosby asked as he still laid in the water, and as the fountian was spraying water on his helmet. “Although it isn’t that bad, its a pretty cool water.” He said afterwards. “Gentlemen, we just arrived in Ponyville.” Spoofer said with a french accent “Oh and flying metal thing too. We arrived in Ponyville” he said directly after. “I have a name you know” Chiro said annoyed. “I know but you called me abomination. Instead of asking my name or giving me one, so I'm restorting to calling to Flying metal thing.” Spoofer said. “What ever floats your boat.” Chiro said even more annoyed at the new name he got. “OH. MY. GOD! THE FOUNTAIN IS FILLED WITH PENNIES! AND THERE ALL MINE!” Crosby yelled on top of his lungs. “THEY ARE MINE! FOR THE HOARD!” Spoofer yelled as he joined in to the fray. After a few minutes of digging around the fountain the had found atleast 100 pennies as Crosby likes to call them, even though they are bits. I think they got very lucky or something since they found like a humongus amount of coins in a fountain. Crosby and Spoofer got out of the fountain and dryed them selfs. Spoofer then suggested that they count the coins and split it 50/50 but as they were standing there counting they failed to notice the pony that was coming from the other side of the town, it probably were some special day or something that had a gathering on the other side of town. Anyways as the pony laid eyes on Crosby and Chiro but ignoring Spoofer. It yelled with all its might “MONSTERS! WAAAH!!” Then it ran away. Crosby and Chiro who had no idea what just happened just stood and hovered there. “What just happened?” They both asked in Unison Too be continued If you are reading so to speak. A/N: Top hat for Spoofer anyone? Special thanks to; Pinkies imagination, RainbowBob for proof reading this heap of junk, Chiromishi (My good old buddy) for helping me edit, Slayerbroman for giving me ideas and YOU! For reading!
A new dimension with a side dish of extra troubleChapter one: A new dimension with a side dish of extra trouble Now that Crosby and Chiro were stuck in an unknown void after being sucked in to the vortex, Crosby thought it would be fun to ask a question. "Hey want to play some cards? I've got a stack of playing cards with me" Crosby said as he opened a pocket and took out a stack of playing cards holding them up. "Yeah? And how the fuck do you think I’m supposed to play? I have no hands or arms, dumbass!" Chiro replied furiously. "Woah dude, calm down! What the fuck is you're problem?" Crosby asked. "Problem? My Problem?! What do you think it is?! IN CASE YOU HAVEN'T NOTICED WE ARE STUCK IN A FUCKING VOID YOU JACKASS! WE MIGHT BE STUCK HERE FOR ALL OF FUCKING ETERNITY!" Chiro screamed making it echo all around them, Crosby looked around them and saw in fact that they were floating in a void. “YEAH SO WHAT?! YOU WERE THE ONE WHO WANTED TO PUSH THAT DAMN BUTTON ANYWAYS! IF YOU DIDN’T WANTED TO PRESS IT WE WOULDN’T BE HERE NOW WOULD WE?! " Crosby shouted back. Chiro glared at him very quietly, thinking about ways to kill Crosby and get away with it, not to mention that they were in a void. A few minutes passed before Crosby spoke up. "Sooo, what do we do now? Tell stories?" Crosby asked Chiro, who replied "Actually, that’s the second best idea I've heard today. Alright you will start by telling a story, then its my turn." "Okay, so this one time when I was out hunting with the boys..." Crosby started and trailed off. Meanwhile In Equestria, it was a normal day. Nothing really special was going on today, just your normal day to day activities was happening. Like the pegasi who cleared the skies from stray clouds, earth ponies that were on there farms doing farming business, which i shouldn’t get in to or bad things are going to happen. Then we have those snobby unicorns who live in Canterlot although not all unicorns are snobby there are some exceptions. But today, on this normal day in Equestria down a lonely stray dirt path leading to absolutely nowhere. Well it might lead somewhere... On this untouched dirt path, there was a lonely pony, who was walking this path. This lonely pony had been walking on this path for about three days. And he was called the Lonely wandering pony, since he wanders all over Equestria, preferably alone. There are some cases he had some companions to join him as he wandered all over Equestria, one of these companions was Flawkes, who sadly passed away a short time ago from a sickness he had. Another companion he had was ‘Courier 27’, who forgot his own name like Crosby has. Those two were had considered themselves “Bros”, because of the things they’ve done together. Sadly they had to part ways when the Courier got a job that had him move to the Frozen North, leaving the wandering pony all alone again. As the lone pony trotted down the dirt path, the sun shone down on his ash gray fur. His spiked cobalt blue mane slightly swayed in the breeze. As he looked up at the sky, he noticed that there were no clouds today. That made him think of a song he heard that was called “Mr.Blue Sky.” He started to hum the merry tune and slowly started to sing the lyrics in his head. “Sun is shinin' in the sky There ain't a cloud in sight It's stopped rainin' ev'rybody's in a play And don't you know It's a beautiful new day hey,hey” As he trotted down the road he started to hear a light hum in the air above him. At first he ignored it, but as he kept trotting down the dirt path the hum slowly got louder. Soon it started to sound like something beginning to tear, like a knife to a fabric. At first he looked around to see where it came from, then he felt the air pressure was off for this beautiful day. It felt like he was in the desert, even though he was out on a breezy plain with a dirt path on it. It became harder to breath for him as the area started to get brighter and brighter.Then all of sudden lightning shot out from nowhere, and knocked him back a few feet away. A flash of light then blinded him momentarily. A few minutes before “And then his head was all like ‘PTHBHBTB’ when he pulled the trigger! Hahahaha! ” Crosby laughed as his tale came to a end. It echoed all around them as he laughed. “You are one sick human being.” Chiro replied trying to look disgusted, but since he’s a drone he had no face to do so. “Heh, yeah guess I’m pretty fucked up. Want to hear what happened when I found a RPG and pointed it towards a bunch of terr- ?” “NO.” Chiro interrupted “Aww come on! It will be a blast! Literally...Hey did it get hot in here?” Crosby said as he adjusted the collar of his uniform. The area around him began to glow brighter until neither of them could see clearly. “I cant feel any difference remember? I’m still a freakin’ drone you dimwit.” Chiro replied. “AW FUCK MY EYES! Chiro! Why did you turn on your flashlight?! ” He shouted as the suddenly felt something close to being shoved into a pool, he felt like he was falling for a few seconds before he hit some thing very hard. “Aggh... fuck that hurt” groaned Crosby as he rolled around in pain. Crosby then heard some distant metal hitting the ground “Chiro was that you hitting the ground?” Crosby asked and hoped it was Chiro since if it was some sort of monster or transformer he would be fucked because of his temporal blindness. Not that he could kill a transformer since they are like huge robots who transform in to vehicles and have super advanced weaponry. “No, it was some other drone, Of course it was me you... I can’t believe it, during the last 20 minutes, I’ve run out of things to call you... Can you see any thing? Because my optical receptor are still adjusting to the light.” Chiro both said and asked. “No.... But I hear something...” Crosby said back and started to listen in to the sound that was coming from all around him. At first it was just a breeze, then it sounded like birds, and finally an unknown groan. Back to the present and the pony The pony sat up groaning the entire time, rubbing his head to get rid of the oncoming headache. He looked around for the unknown source that knocked him back, blinded him, and shot lighting everywhere. His gaze came to a stop when his eyes fell upon a strange creature covered in what seemed like some cloth with weird metal objects on it. Next to him was a small metallic device that appeared to be sitting next to it. They appeared to be arguing about something. Back to the human and drone “What do you mean we are no longer on earth?” Crosby asked Chiro. “How should I put it? We no longer are on earth, because I can’t detect the Internet?” “So wait... You are telling me that this planet has no Internet nor satellites?” Crosby said. “Yeah...” “NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Crosby yelled as he imitated Darth Vader. “I’m gonna miss all the senseless violence that comes from the Internet now!” Crosby quietly sobbed as he said that. “It has been the only thing keeping me sane! Though I'm also gonna miss the GPS tracking... Gon’ be so hard to find my way around things now ” “Well then.... At least the government won’t track us now! We are free! You hear me?! FREE!” Chiro says as he started up his rotors. “Thats ‘Murica for you.” Crosby said as he tried to stand up but was stopped by a huge headache. ‘Ouch... This feels worse than when I ran headfirst in to a brick wall, stupid alleyways’ he thought as he sat back down. “I believe I broke my non-talk quota today, but then again, who gives a solid fuck?” Crosby said to no-one in particular. “Well for one I don't give a single crap about you, because I don’t have any bowels.” Chiro said to Crosby as he hovered over to his face. “Ouch, right in the feels.” Crosby replied a bit disheartened, holding a hand over where his heart would be. Crosby then looked down, and noticed that he was sitting on a dirt path. He then heard a small gulp coming from his right, both him and Chiro looked to the right and saw something that made them both scream like little girls. At least Crosby did because he saw a small spider on the dirt road. “OH MY GOD! A SPIDER! AAAIIIEE!” Crosby screamed flying back a few feet. But unbeknowst to Crosby his little outburst didn’t get noticed by Chiro since his optical receptor was strained on one confused looking pony. Who was sitting there all alone and confused. A few moments of silence passed as both Chiro and The pony stared at each other, until Chiro had a small mental breakdown trying to analyze the thing that was sitting in front of him, all whilst the pony in front of him was almost terrified of what would happen to him if the two creatures tried to attack him. “What are you!? ABOMINATION!?” Chiro yelled at the pony, pointing his machine gun at it. As the pony tries to respond, Chiro shoots around it trying to hit it, but ends up miserably failing in the process. “God dammit, my stabilizers are down... This’ll take awhile to repair, mind holding still for 20 minutes as I repair these suckers?” As Chiro opened fire on the poor lone pony, Crosby was snapped out of his “Little school girl that’s super scared of spiders” trance when he saw that Chiro was shooting something, so he skipped over the the small spider and walked over to Chiro as he was talking to an unknown creature, saying something about holding still while he repairs something. “What are you shooting at?” Crosby asked Chiro as he walked up to him. “THAT ABOMINATION!” Chiro said without taking his optical receptor off the pony. Crosby looked the same way that Chiro was facing, and found out that there was a sitting pony there or well “miniature horse” in Crosby’s brain. “Abomination? What are you insane? That thing is adorable!” Crosby said gesturing towards the pony. “Adorable my metallic exhaust pipe, that thing is an abomination!” Chiro said still looking at the pony. As those two kept arguing over if the pony was adorable or not, the pony decided to try to sneak away, since during the heat of the argument Chiro decided to face Crosby instead and yell at him. But just when the pony thought he was safe enough to actually run away, he heard, “Hey! Where the fuck is he going?” from a metallic sounding voice. The pony froze in fear as he heard that voice, he thought about running away, but wasn’t sure what the other creature would do. As the whirring got closer he laid down and covered his head with his hooves. “Look you scared the poor thing!” Crosby said to Chiro. “IT STILL A FUCKING ABOMINATION! It must be purged with holy bullets and 40mm Grenades!” Chiro replied with malice in his electronic voice. Crosby shook his head and walked up to the small cowering pony. “I agree that it might be a abomination in adorableness, but come on! It has so much adorableness its almost cute!” Crosby said as he almost leaped with joy, but managed to restrain him self. “Yeah, yeah it’s sweet enough to cause a heart attack. NOW LET ME KILL IT.” Chiro said and flying closer towards the pony “More like cause ‘One look then instant diabeetus’ than heart attack” Crosby thought. “How the fuck can you tell if something is sweet? You don’t have any taste buds... Or a mouth for that matter.” Crosby replied. “I understand the concept of the taste ‘sweet’ since I for one knows how to think compared to you.” Chiro said. “Touché flying robot of death. ” Crosby mumbled. Then he looked back at the small mammal next to him, that was still shaking in fear. He began to look over the small animal, checking for any type of identification of who could be the owner of it. Crosby looked around for awhile, but couldn’t find anything.”I hope it has a good nose, ‘cause I’m gonna ask where its house is.” he thought. Crosby then proceeded crouch down in front of and stared right in to the pony’s eyes. He silently thanked god for his one-way sunglasses which made this whole day just a little more easier to stand. He also noticed that the pony’s eyes were huge. “Those eyes kinda make you wonder how big their brain is...” Crosby thought as he kept looking at them. He kept looking at them for awhile before remembering what he was gonna do, to ask if the pony had a owner and hope for a answer Little did Crosby know that the pony could actually talk. “Hey there little fella, are you lost? If that’s the case, maybe me and my flying friend here could help you find you’re way home.” Crosby asked with a tiny bit of concern in his voice. “THERE IS NO. FUCKING. WAY. I’M HELPING THAT ABOMINATION!” Chiro screamed scaring away a few nearby birds. “Quiet, you fool!” Crosby said in a raspy voice he never knew existed “The fuck was that?” he thought afterwards. “The fuck was that?” Chiro asked Crosby. “I just asked my self the same thing a few seconds ago.” Crosby replied “I-If I may...” A unknown voice said. “Who said that?” Chiro asked Crosby, who then replied with a shrug. Chiro quickly scanned the area to find who said something, but found that only Crosby, him and the pony were the only ones around. As Chiro frantically looked around as the pony sat up and looked Crosby in the eyes then said, “I did.” in a very confident voice. Crosby could have sworn that his jaw crashed right through the planet. He just kept staring at the pony for a few moments before facing Chiro and saying, “It.....Spoke.” “What?” Chiro asked with a bit of confusion. “It.... Spoke....” He repeated. “Ooookay. What spoke?” “The pony.” Crosby answered Chiro. “It did?”Chiro said with a voice filled with laughter that was barely suppressed. “As a matter of fact, I did” The pony answered Chiro. Just as the pony finished speaking, Chiro had a power outage in one of his circuits and lost power to port-side rotors and did a barrel roll into the ground whilst playing up a sound from 1997 that screamed “Do a barrel roll!” from his built in speakers. “What did i tell you about that thing! IT’S AN ABOMINATION! IT DESERVES TO BE KILLED!” Chiro yelled as he crashed. Crosby only looked at Chiro then shook his head and said. “No need to kill civvies” Crosby said with no emotion in his voice. “No need to kill them... Yet.... The only thing i find weird is here, is that the pony talks in perfect English....” He thought and then Crosby had a great idea. “If he talks English, then his buddies must talk English too, so if I ask his name I might get...” he thought. “Hey whats your name pony guy?” Crosby asked. “It’s -” “Im going to call you SpooferMcSpoofington!” Crosby said proudly. “Every freaking time...” SpooferMcSpoofington thought to him self. “What? but I already have a name!” SpooferMcSpoofington protested. “Yes, and It’s SpooferMcSpoofington! Now where were you headed?” Crosby asked. “No where in particular, this road goes to some small town called ‘Ponyville’ I thought I might check it out since I’ve never been there.” SpooferMcSpoofington said “TOO PONY- WHAT EVER IT WAS CALLED!” Crosby roared with vigor. “Ville” SpooferMcSpoofington corrected Crosby “TOO PONTY-VILLE!” Crosby roared again “Pony.” SpooferMcSpoofington corrected Crosby again. “TOO WHATEVER HE SAID!” Crosby roared for the third time “NOW, ONWARD TOWARDS ADVENTURE!” And with that Both SpooferMcSpoofington and Crosby set out on the path towards Ponyville. “Whatever I can live with the new name anyways. I’m just glad I got company again, it was getting kinda lonely, just got to ask though. Why SpooferMcSpoofington?” SpooferMcSpoofington asked Crosby. “Its Spoofer now.” Crosby replied “What?” Spoofer asked, but never got a answer leaving him confused as they set off into the horizon. “Ummm guys? Where are you going? Guys? HEY GUYS!? THIS ISN’T FUNNY! I KNOW I SAID SOME THINGS, I DIDN’T MEAN ANY OF IT! COME BAAAACK!” Chiro shouted towards nobody in particular. “Oh god! The spider... Its getting closer!” Chiro shouted again. “Shoo! Shoo! Get away you eight-legged freak! OH GOD NO, NO! DON’T CLIMB ON MY OPTICAL RECEPTOR! IT IS SENSITIVE TO HAIRY LEGS! NOOOO!” Chiro half-shouted and Half-sobbed. “Hey do you feel like we are forgetting something?” Spoofer asked Crosby. “Hmmm..... NAH!” Crosby replied as he kept walking with Spoofer and ignoring the screams he heard. To be continued... IN THE NEXT EPISODE OF DRAGON BALL... Oh wait wrong fiction. A/N: SpooferMcSpoofington is just a random name that Chiro called me once, decided to make that in to a OC. Btw should I give Spoofer a tophat? Tell me in the comments. And again, thanks for reading! Love you all! (No homo I guess?) Special thanks. RainbowBob and Pinkies imagination for proof reading this heap of junk Chiromishi (My good ol' buddy) for editing. And Slayerbroman, for giving me some ideas. And of course YOU! For reading this fiction!
