Of Archon Toilets and Bioballs

by MiniPsyker

Rating: everyone
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Other, Random, Crossover, Human
Length: 74562

A not-so-friendly match between our hero and another person goes awry after a glitch in the conflict

Mike, a not so bright Dominion officer in the Koprulu sector is tasked with many objectives. Namely those with great danger and slim chances of success. Not because he's fit for them, but because his superiors actually want to get rid of him for several reasons.

He was tasked with defeating a protoss expeditionary fleet one day, but everything went south as he experienced a rather common tactic firsthand. Normally he'd have endured and pulled through, but there was something that stopped him and sent him to another dimension entirely. That 'something', obviously, was a bad Koprunet(tm) connection.

(This fanfic takes more emphasis on the gameplay aspects of Starcraft 2 rather than the lore. Expect to see things that'd normally be impossible otherwise.)

EDIT: Added the 'Random' tag since compared to other fanfics with this subject, it's over-the-top nonsensical stuff. Emphasis in over-the-top.

Published 2012-11-19 01:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2014-01-16 03:43:32 UTC

Chapter 3: The Cloak Master

Twilight yawned as she woke up, stretching her arms outwards while in bed and the blanked covering half of her body. She sat up and looked around, her eyelids heavy and almost closed, yet open nevertheless. She could see how Spike was still sleeping on his makeshift bed, snoring not so loudly.

"Morning..." She whispered to Spike, without intentions of being heard, smiling. This morning was beautiful, with birds singing, the hooves of the ponies walking outside being heard, the rays of light entering through the window, and a bright sky without a cloud in sight. She moved her blanket away and stood up, ready to start the day.

"Stray MULE!!" A voice screamed outside. She thought a mule was running amok and didn't pay much attention. She began walking towards the staircase, only to be interrupted halfway by a giant warhead-looking steel object falling from the sky, breaking through the roof and embeding itself into the floor. The steel missile broke appart, and from inside, a strange yellow machine with saws on its arms and red paint on a few places came out with the characteristic beeping of stereotypical machines.

"Wh-- What?!" Twilight Sparkle could barely ask herself. Spike, who was woken up by the noise, stood next to her with the same expression: Eyes wide open and jaw almost hitting the floor.

The machine, which had the engraving "M.U.L.E." on the side, suddenly moved on its own, went downstairs, and broke through the door. Apparently opening doors wasn't in its programming.

Twilight, dumbfounded and upon recovering from her trance, quickly decided to follow the strange object to figure out what it was, where it came from, and what its purpose here was. She ran downstairs and jumped through the gap where the door used to be placed in. Then after a quick look around she saw the MULE circling her house around as if its objecting was something behind it. She followe it, and once she found something she was not expecting, opened her eyes and mouth even more than before. Right in front of her eyes was Mike and an entire Terran base, and in the distance, a few other bases acting as expansions.

"What... In the hay... Is..." She muttered, shocked.

"Yo." Mike greeted, appearing right next to Twilight as he stared at his work.

"How-- Why-- When-- What the-- HOW IN--" Twilight was being overwhelmed by everything.

"WOAH THERE CALM DOWN, one question at a time."

"Where did all those 'terrans' come from?!"

"Minerals." Mike stated as he held a mineral shard. "Thankfully I'm not limited to 200 supply, apparently I can build as many as I want without consequences."

"...Minerals?! Those are living creatures, and you're telling me they came from minerals!!?"

"Yeah."

"..."

"Yo! 50 minerals over here!" Mike yelled. At his command, 2 marines holding buckets of minerals appeared and threw them into one of the many barracks around. The building flashed, and a few seconds later a marine was kicked out.

"What!?" Twilight asked utterly confused. Mike only shrugged, as if he didn't know either but accepted the fact. "F-fine... Uhhhh... Where did you come from then?!"

"Bad Koprunet(tm) and an archon toilet."

"What."

"Bad Koprunet(tm) and an archon toilet."

"..."

"Seriously."

"...Right... What are those minerals and geysers?! They didn't even exist here before I met you!"

"They are-- Wait... They are... Uhhh... Oh wow, I actually don't know what they are. I just know they make stuff."

"You don't even know!?"

"Nope."

"Oh for f-- Sigh... This is going to give me a headache... You have a base here, right? You'll stay here so I can ask you questions later, right?"

"I have nowhere to go for the time being."

"...."

Twilight just slowly backed off towards her house, not wanting to even understand what was going on. Spike, however, had other intentions.

"Can I eat those 'minerals'??" He asked, seeing them as gems.

"Yeah, sure, why not. They are replenished after a while of no combat going on around." Mike answered as he handed him a bucketload of minerals.

"So that means you never run out of them!?"

"Sometimes I do but I just wait a bit."

"...Can I get some every once in a while?"

"I don't see why not."

A few hours later...

"Booooooored..." Mike sighed as he rested on top of a flying barracks strolling above ponyville. But then, his ears caught something. Not dust, but a noise from below. A noise as if a group was fighting. He crawled to the top edge of the barracks and stared down below.

"QUIET!!" Twilight yelled, silencing the other 5 pastel-coloured small talking equined around her. "Girls, there's no use in arguing.

"But Twilight..." Rarity begged.

"AH! This is my decision and I'm gonna make it on my own. And I certainly can't think straight with all this noise! ...Not to mention hunger! Now go on, shoo!" Everyone began walking their own path away. "And don't worry! I'll figure this out!"

The flying barracks turned around and flew a short distance before turning off its engines, falling and crushing a building completely. Coincidentially, Spike was in front of where it landed. "Yo Spike, what happened?" Mike answered.

"Uhhh I don't know if I should tell--"

Mike threw a bucket of minerals at him.

"Twilight got two tickets for the Grand Galloping Gala from Princess Celestia and everyone wants the free ticket."

"Grand whaaa?"

"Galloping Gala."

"Sounds gay."

"Yeah well, it's special for them."

"So there are two tickets and 6 ponies who want to go?"

"Yeah."

"Hmmmm..." Mike planned with a devious smile, his boredom had reached critical mass already. "Princess Celestia was that big white horse from before?"

"You shouldn't refer to the Princess herself like that... But yes."

"Where does she reside?"

"Canterlot castle. It's directly that way embeded in the mountain cliff."

"I see..." Mike said as he stared at the castle in the distance. "Thanks for the intel."

"Anytime."

Minutes later...

Canterlot castle, main doors. Two guards patrolling it side by side with the giant doors closed for everyone. Mike in a Ghost outfit stared with a pair of binoculars from a safe distance, waiting for an opportunity.

"Come on..." He whispered to himself. There appeared to be no way to enter except for the main gates. This could be confirmed by the failed attempts at climbing the walls and entering through a window leaving a giant ocean of corpses at the foot of the mountain, which magically disappeared after a while.

Around ten minutes passed before the first sign of movement appeared, an escort with a dark blue tall pony, apparently Luna. Mike saw the opportunity and followed them with his sight. They moved towards the castle doors, and once close enough, they opened. This was the time. Mike stood up, activated his cloaking device, and gave the order. "Go!"

Out of the woods no less than five hundred Ghosts activating their cloaking devices charged out, shaking the trees and sending a flock of birds flying. A small earthquake followed them as they pushed eachother like a big drunken moshpit towards the castle with Mike leading them. They got closer and closer until they passed Luna and her escort, leaving them dumbfounded as they kept on spinning and spinning due to the momentum, yet not having the slightest idea of what just happened.

They charged inside and kept following the red carpet, making it violently wave one way and the other. Yet Celestia, who was sitting on her throne, only saw the carpet moving on her own, thinking it was a small earthquake. The five hundred Ghost force pushed through, passing Celestia and rendering her mane as a bad afro, and entered what appeared to be her room. The reason they entered her room, of course, was because they were following the biggest corridors and ended up there by mere chance.

"Spread!" Mike yelled. Five hundred Ghosts cramped in a tiny space searching every single corner for yellow pieces of paper, yet finding none for the time being. They kept on searching and searching, until the minuscule maneuvering space accidentally made a Ghost uncharge his rifle with a snipe shot, hitting another poor ghost in the face. The ghost fell on his rifle and discharged yet another shot, causing another to fire, and so on and so on, until snipe shots and EMP shots were the only thing around for minutes, causing an incredible ruckus and a kill count that'd put Simo Hayha to shame, and the EMPs throwing more than half the ghosts into an epileptic fit. If the battle at the Ancient castle of the etc looked like a rave moshpit, then this was something out of this world entirely. Then, it all went silent when someone tried opening the door.

Mike and the ghosts stood petrified looking at the doorknob spinning, realizing that the EMPs that rained down depleted their energy and they couldn't cloak, until panic struck and they all desperately tried leaving the room by breaking through the walls and jumping out the windows. Of course no one realized the castle was on a mountain, so they pretty much jumped to their deaths. Maybe they actually knew about it and decided death was a better fate. Mike, however, was just too slow and only got halfway to the window before Celestia opened the door with her magic, staring inside with shock in her face as she saw her room looking like Berlin after being bombarded by the Soviets. Mike was shocked too as she stared at Celestia, he had no way to escape and was at her mercy.

"...Mike?" Celestia asked. As soon as she finished, the last remaining intact shard of glass in the window collapsed, with the entire wall soon following.

"Boo..." Mike ranted as he sat next to Celestia in her carriage led by her guards, with Ponyville as its destination.

"So, if I understand well, you barged into the castle just to get a few more tickets?"

"...Yeah."

"Why do you want to go to the Grand Galloping Gala so much then? Only ponies are interested."

"I don't. I just wanted to give them to Twilight."

"That's so kind." Celestia said. What she failed to understand is that Mike just wanted an excuse to jump straight into the action out of boredom. "But why didn't she say so in the first place...?"

Once the carriage reached the altitudes of Ponyville, both Celestia and Mike saw a great multitude of ponies chasing another purple pony. Upon closer inspection, it was Twilight herself.

"What." Mike said. He didn't even expect an answer.

"Hmm, looks like everyone wants that spare ticket. Maybe we should help her out."

Mike widened his eyes at the opportunity of yet another action-packed over the top mission appearing. "Allow me." He said as he suicidally jumped off the carriage without second thought. But as Celestia watched how he fell, a flying factory intercepted his fall, making him crash into it. It gained more speed and flew forwards towards the conglomeration of ponies.

"Uhhh..." Twilight frighteningly muttered, being cornered by the ponies in a dead end. Out of desesperation, she began casting a teleportation spell to get out of there, but lost focus as a factory slammed its way out of a building and appearing right behind Twilight and Spike.

"Yo, need a ride?" Mike asked from inside.

Without a second thought, Twilight and Spike climbed inside, with the zombie horde pony horde still trying to convince Twilight for the ticket outside. The factory' engine made noise characteristic of an old car from the 60's, struggling to pull back, until it expelled a great pitch black wall of smoke and got out the way it came in, collapsing the building it damaged in the process.

Inside the factory, Mike sat in an almost exact replica of a car's interior as he drove the flying building, with Twilight not even caring anymore to understand what Mike brought with him.

"Thanks for getting me out of there..." Twilight said.

All of a sudden, Celestia teleported inside the factory next to Twilight.

"P-Princess Celestia!! Uhhh... I can explain, Mike is--"

"He has explained everything to me already, Twilight."

"Wait, what? When?"

"He tried sneaking into the castle to get you a few tickets for the Gala. He has a kind soul." Again, she failed to understand Mike only sought amusement. Even now he was trying to supress his laughter at this misunderstanding. "Tell me, if you wanted more tickets for your friends, why didn't you say so?"

"Oh... Well... I..."

"Brace for impact." Mike with an overly deep voice said as he prepared for the landing. He opened the top of a box, revealing a button inside it, and punched it. The engines suddenly stopped, and the inertia sent the three of them to the ceiling of the factory. It shook and shook as it fell to the ground, until it violently lowered its speed and shook even more as if something was in the way. Of course, Mike landed on top of another building. The three of them were sent to the floor of the factory as soon as it struck the building, and once everything was calm, Mike stood up and opened a hatch that led outside.

"Dominion inc. holds no responsibility for any broken bones this journey might've caused. All rights reserved." He said as he jumped out with Spike, the incredible shaking leaving his hair like an afro. Both Twilight and Celestia stepped out, both with an afro too, and stood outside where the rest of the mane 6 awaited them. "That was fun. I'll be in the base if you guys need me." He said as he walked away, with Spike following him for the minerals.

"That was... Interesting..." Twilight remarked. Celestia soon patted her shoulder reminding her of something. "G-Girls, look!" She said as she levitated six tickets with her magic. Everyone began cheering with Celestia laughing to herself, and sporting a fabulous spherical hairstyle.

Chapter 4: Concussive shell Season

Mike laid on the grass with his visor covering his face from the sun, snoring as loud as a Terran could. His mission to secure the sacred tickets days ago had met disastrous results, and so did the castle.  But, just like any other Terran, he shrugged it off and ignored the fact, since he was still alive and kicking.

"Stampede!!" Rainbow Dash screamed as the earth shook violently. Mike raised his visor and stared at her with an annoyed expression.

"Will you shut up?! I'm trying to sleep over here!!" He yelled. Then, he noticed the small earthquake he was ignoring. He quickly stood up, lowered his visor, and ran to the main road to get a better line of sight at the source of the noise and movement. He only stared, seeing a giant cloud of dist moving at tremendous speed towards Ponyville. "Holy mother of mercy..." He muttered to himself. Then, he ran directly in front of the bridge, with twenty marines already holding their position right behind him. Mike turned around to face his forces, and while the great stampede moved closer and closered, mustered his courage.

"Sons of Tarsonis, of Korhal, my brothers!" He began yelling at his men while the stempede drew even nearer. "I see in your eyes the same fear that would take the heart of me. A day may come when the courage of Terrans fails, when we forsake our friends and break all bonds of fellowship, but it is not this day. An hour of woes and shattered helms, when the age of Terrans comes crashing down! But it is not this day! This day we fight! By all that you hold dear on this good Equestria, I bid you stand, Men of the Dominion!" His men began furiously cheering and throwing their arms in the air, with Mike turning around to face the great stampede. "For Korhal!" He screamed at the top of his lungs as he pointed at the unknown enemy. He, with his twenty marines, charged forwards to face the great foe.

"Yeehaw!" Applejack yelled as she chased the cow stampede. "Put 'em up, girl!" She cheered Winona as they both narrowed the lines of the stampede. "Come on little doggies, turn!" She said as she hit one of the cows to fall in line. Then, she whistled towards Winona. "Winona, put 'em up!" She and Winona both jumped over the cows with great confidence, as if this was just another day in the somewhat violent office. "Ha hah! Gotcha!" After that, she began preparing her lasso to throw it against the leader of the bovine rebellion. She threw it, expecting to catch the cow by the neck, only to receive something else entirely. "What in tarnation?!" She violently asked herself as she dodged a marine she accidentally lasso'd, with the poor marine screaming all the way to the ground. By dodging, she also lost balance and the violent movements of the cows threw her to the ground, and by the time she recovered she saw that there wasn't a stampede anymore, just a conglomeration of cows, marines and ponies arranged in a circle staring at the center while cheering, as if spectating something. Applejack, completely dumbfounded, decided to check, closing in distance until she was right behind the wall of cows, steel marines and ponies, pushing her way forward to see what the ruckus was about. What she didn't expect, however, was to see Mike and Mooriella having a freestyle wrestling championship tournament. "...What?"

Mike dodged a hoof to the face and quickly maneuvered behind Moorielle, kicking her knees, grabbing her by the stomach and executing a german supplex by using both their weights against her. As she recovered crouching, he grabbed her from the front by the chest, lifted her until she was upside down, and piledrove her to the ground, knocking her unconcsious. He victoriously raised his arms in the air as the marine force cheered at him and threw him flowers and half opened energy cans, with the bell ringing granting him the well deserved title of "Master cow-wrestling professional champion."

"..." Applejack just stared with her mouth open. She didn't understand half of what just happened, let alone understand anything Mike had done in his arrival. She kept staring as the 19 marines carried Mike to his throne, with the remaining marine tied with a lasso trying to catch up with them.

"And so, with no further ado, it is my privilege to give the prize, Pony of Ponyville Award, to our beloved guest of honor, a pony of the utmost trustworthiness, reliability, and integrity. Ponyville's most capable and dependable friend..." Mayor Mare turned to the curtain and raised her hoof towards it. "Mike!"

The curtain opened, only to reveal nothing behind it. Of course, the hole in the floor implied the obvious: The weight of his power armor made him fall down below to the depths. Ignore the fact that the wooden floor constructed there was directly above solid ground.

"I ain't no damn pony, I'm a Terran!" A voice echoed from the depths below. "Wait, a prize!? Ahem, uhh guys I think I might be a pony. For today anyways."

"Man I'm starving..." A marine that followed Mike around stated. "We haven't eaten for days..."

"I know that pain, son..." Mike responded. "Wasn't there a pony around that made sweets or something?"

"Far as I know that pink pony whatever her name was had a store called 'Sugarcube corner'. If the name's something to go by, well, you know."

"True. I also heard before falling down that pit before receiving the prize that she was gonna bake a load of... Something. Might be a good opportunity."

"For more than a hundred marines and SCVs?" The marine asked with skepticism.

"You shrug off the fact that there are pastel-coloured talking small ponies, pegasi and unicorns living in a fully functional medieval society yet you worry about supply and demand?"

"Touché. Hey what's that thing?" The marine asked upon seeing a blue pegasus flying around, but not as if it was at will, but as if it was shot out of a catapult.

"Welcome to Equestria."

A few hours later...

"Free muffin sample spectacular!" Pinkie Pie said with joy behind a counter, with several muffins in front of her.

"Yeah! Muffin spectacles! Get 'em while they're hot." Applejack said on the brink of falling asleep.

Once the smell of the freshly-baked muffins spread out, a small earthquake suddenly began affecting everyone. It wasn't another stampede, it was more than a hundred starving marines running as fast as their legs allowed towards the muffins, with a giant blinding cloud of dust following them. They, with the cloud, reached the muffins, and once the cloud dissipated, they disappeared into the distance. Almost no muffins remained.

"Damn sods." Mike sighed as he looked for a muffin. "Leaving me with almost nothing. Oh hey there's one." He grabbed one as his face lit up with extreme joy. But before he could hace a taste of the muffins of questionable creation, his visor began beeping at an alarming rate. He put the muffin back on the counter, lowered his visor, and checked what was wrong. In his visor he saw a top-down view of Ponyville, with his base gathering minerals and creating soldiers. On the bottom left of his visor, there was a minimap. On the bottom, details on what he was selecting at the moment with a wireless connection. On the bottom right, several orders he could give to the selected unit. And on the top right, minerals, gas and supply counts. As far as he could see, the supply was far higher than what would limit him in a conventional match, it was even higher than 200, as if only the amount of supply depots limited him. But what he noticed was that his supply count was tremendously dropping at an incredible rate, until it reached a point where it stopped. It's as if something had killed most of his marines in a short time span. "What."

"Uhhh..." Pinkie Pie worringly muttered as her face turned to a shade of green. "I don't feel so well..."

"Boy, that was hard work." Applejack said not understanding half of the stuff that was going on due to sleep deprivation. At this time Pinkie Pie fell to the floor knocked out, releasing the muffin she was eating in an overly dramatic slow-motion manner.

"Yeah... No thanks..." Mike unnervingly said as he left the muffin on the table, thinking it was poisoned by Applejack as sign of revenge for stealing her prize. "Hmmm... I've been using marines all the time..." He began thinking, before giving out a smile.

"Ka-boom, baby!" A marauder yelled, jumping out of a barracks with a tech lab add-on.

"Welcome to the fray, soldier." Mike greeted him. "Got good news for you. Since we're in Equestria, your life expectancy has increased by two minutes."

"Woohoo!" The marauder cheered with his arm grenade launchers thrown in the air. "So, what's up?"

"Meh." He shrugged. At this time, another three marauders walked out of three other barracks with tech labs, grouping with Mike. The group started walking down to the main square of ponyville just to chill out, but before they even walked half the path, they could feel another earthquake, and saw Rainbow Dash flying into the air.

"Stampede!" Rainbow Dash screamed as loud as she could.

"First round's on me!" A marauder yelled as Mike and the four marauders ran to intercept the stampede. Once they arrived to the designated path, they stood their ground, with Mike at the center and two marauders on each side. There they stood as the stampade drew close, like an old western film except with 26th century tech.

"Times a' wasting..." A marauder in its characteristic ghetto brudda voice sighed as he checked his grenade launcher, while the other began loading, and Mike checked his rifle.

But as the horde drew closer and closer, they notices their foes were far smaller than originally expected. They weren't cows either. They were... Bunnies. Mike and his four marauders bursted out laughing at the incoming horde, with their laughter intensifying past untold levels once they saw ponies panicking and falling unconscious on the ground. A poor marauder couldn't hold it and fell to the floor laughing, smashing his grenade launchers to the floor desperately gasping for air.

"Oh man... Say, that's still a stampede. You all got concussive shells?" Mike questioned.

"Believe it!"

"Alright men..." Mike said as he rose his gun at the incoming bunnies. "Wait, I wonder..."

"Yeah?"

"What if we just stand in their way so that they cannot advance? We'd stop them without even trying."

"Imagine the face on the ponies, hah!"

They all stood in place as the bunnies advanced yet impacted against their steel feet, piling up in front of them with no way to advance. This kept continuing until the stampede reached a stop.

"Ooohh..." Mike taunted as he and his four marauders looked at the bunnies. "Looks like the bunnies didn't have their rabbit feet with them..."

The bunnies, frightened past their limit, piled up and climbed on top of each other, with Mike and the marauders just staring in confusion as the pile of bunnies reached twice their height. The mass of bunnies began shaping forms until, much to the Terrans' surprise, formed up with their anatomy. Two arms, two legs, a torso and a head, all made up entirely of bunnies.

"What." The marauders and Mike said in unison as they stared high above them to the tall creature made up entirely of woodland creatures.

"Let's do this." A marauder said as he aimed its grenade launcher at it.

"It's go time."

"Why not."

"It's about to get heavy!"

"Up an' at 'em, boys!" Mike screamed. The firefight between the giant bunny and the Terrans had begun as bullets and concussive shells flew left and right, with the bunny grabbing a marauder and throwing it into a house with tremendous force.

Twilight hummed a tune to herself, strolling around Ponyville, but her expression changed to fright as she gasped, seeing Mike, three marauders, and several ponies knocked out on the floor.

"I'm in a world of hurt!" A marauder yelled, stuck inside a building, before it crumbled on top of him. "Damn I was good..."

"...I don't get it." Twilight said.

"T-Twilight..." Mike could barely muster the strength to speak as he crawled up to Twilight. "My time... Is short. I will no longer be among your kind in moments, for my death draws near... The bunnies, monsters from the north, they are unlike anything I've ever seen in my life... Zerg, dark creatures from the edges of known space, decided to devour every sentient being, even they do not compare to the horrors I have witnessed here..." He violently coughed and tried regaining his strength. "You hold the keys, you can find out who unleashed these beasts upon us... Twilight... You must... Avenge me..." He barely finished speaking before falling unconscious again.

"Applejack..." Twilight sighed, shrugging off Mike's desperately dramatic attempts at final words as just an annoyance.

Another few hours later...

"Keep down, make as little noise as possible..." Mike ordered as he and 200 marauders spread over the entirety of the Sweet Apple Acres, marching forwards towards the barn.

"This place's scary, man... Got a bad feeling 'bout this..." A marauder stated.

"It's what we have to do. If we don't... Those monsters would return..." Another marauder explained.

"Oh God..."

"Trees. Trees everywhere. Where are we going anyways?"

"Scouting." Mike explained. "I hold no information of this place, that's why we're spread apart. We need to scout, and find the source of this problem... First we--" He was cut short by an apple falling on top of him. He didn't relize it was an apple, and thought it was a dark creature tactically throwing himself on top of him for a gruesome fate. "GET IT OFF ME!! GET IT OFF ME!!" He screamed as he shook himself, shooting blindly in the air. The stray bullets impact on several trees, which made them shake and, in turn, release the apples on unsuspecting marauders. Concussive shells flew left and right as they reacted the same way as Mike, with their shells striking more trees, releasing more apples, impacting on more marauders, and so on creating a chain reaction that engulfed literally every single Terran in the force.

"Applejack? Applejack!" Twilight called.

"Huh...?" Applejack answered as she woke up after passing out due to the amount of apples left to buck.

"Oh, good, you're okay. Now Applejack, I completely respect the Apple family ways. You're always there to help any pony in need, so maybe you can put a little of your stubborn pride aside and allow your friends to help you."

"Okay, Twilight..."

"I am not taking "no" for an answer--what?"

"Yes, Twilight. Yes, please. I could really use your help."

Twilight chuckled, and then sighed of relief. But as Applejack stood up and they both turned to the unbucked trees in the Sweet Apple Acres, their face changed from relief, to utter shock. All the trees had their apples released to the ground, even though minutes ago they were intact. They had no explanation whatsoever to what just happened, but before they could even mutter gibberish to themselves trying to come up with an explanation, they saw Mike and a few marauders coming out of the woods. All with visors broken, paint scraped off, parts cracked and almost outright broken, and fury in their eyes.

"Applejack!" Mike yelled as he walked closer while the rest stood their ground. "You let those bunnies loose on Ponyville, right?!"

"...I what?"

"Mike, wait!" Twilight tried grabbing his attention.

"What!?"

"She didn't sleep in days, it was an accident!!"

"What."

"An accident! She scared the bunnies off because she was too tired to focus properly. Fluttershy herself said so."

Mike just stood there with a blank expression, trying to process the information he was provided.

"So... It was all an accident?" He asked.

"Yes."

"Because she didn't sleep?"

"Yes."

"And she didn't sleep because...?"

"She had to get all the apples from those trees." She said as she pointed to the woods he the marauders came out of.

"...Those things were apples?!-- Ahem... Well, I made the job easier." He tried making the others think it was his plan all along. Obviously, the others already knew everything. "So... Uhhh... Go to sleep maybe?"

"Yeah, sure..." Applejack mindlessly said before passing out again right were she stood.

"Uhhh Mike?" Twilight called.

"Yeah?"

"Mind helping us a bit in collecting the apples?"

"Yeah, sure." He complied, seeing as if he refused he'd just sit around in his base doing nothing.

Time later, Marauders, Mike, Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Twilight, Fluttershy, Rarity and Pinkie Pie were gathering the apples left on the floor with several wagons. The marauders obviously struggling and every once in a while accidentally shooting their grenade launchers due to, obviously, their power armor hands being replaced by the grenade launchers themselves.

"Yeah, I've got all five fingers! Three on this hand, two on the other one!" A marauder yelled in annoyance following a conversation between him and a few other marauders.

"Dear Princess Celestia,

My friend Applejack is the best friend a pony could ever have, and she's always there to help any pony. The only trouble is, when she needs help, she finds it hard to accept it, so while friendship is about giving of ourselves to friends, it's also about accepting what our friends have to offer.

Your faithful student,

Twilight Sparkle.

P.S. Mike might be dumb and scary, but he's useful if you play your cards right. Emphasis on scary. I mean, how can he create an army out of random mineral chunks and gas canisters while..." Twilight kept throwing gibberish at the letter as she wrote it. Hell knows if Celestia would understand half of it.

Chapter 5: Viking the Brush Off

"Why so many papers?" Mike asked as he and three other marauders helped Spike carry a few letters in the townhall.

"This is the town hall. You'd be surprised to see how many there are here on a busy day."

"Horrifying..."

Once there were no letters left, the five of them began walking towards the door, everyone with their hands full. Spike opened the door and walked outside, Mike and two marauders followed, while the last marauder closed the door and caught up to them. They descended the small stairs, but as soon as they reached ground, they were met with a loud thunderstorm that scared them. Spike jumped back in fright, but Mike and the three marauders dropped their letters and desperately ran around seeking cover, with the marauders unloading their grenade launchers towards every single direction, succesfully striking the wall of the town hall and making it crumble upon itself. They didn't stop, they kept running and running while Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash, the minds behind the prank, laughed loudly after Spike began hiccuping.

"Hahah, good one Pinkie Pie, you're always pulling a fast one on me."

As Spike was collecting the scrolls that laid on the floor, he unintentionally hiccuped, sending green flames towards the scroll, which also caught a marauder that was running around.

MEANWHILE, IN THE CASTLE...

Celestia's focus changed from a paper she was reading to a green flame that made its way towards her, unsure of what it might carry since she was not expecting anything. Out of it, a scroll apeared and fell to the floor. Confused, she just stared at how it fell, but once she looked up again, her eyes widened in shock.

"GAAAAAAH!" A marauder yelled as he fell on top of Celestia. "...I'm in a world of hurt..."

Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash kept on laughing, while Spike managed to get most of the scrolls. By a certain turn of fate, he hiccuped again and sent the scrolls he carried to Celestia with that characteristic green flame, which, unfortunately, also accidentally engulfed Mike and the remaining two marauders.

"Incoming!!" Mike screamed as he fell on top of Celestia. Thud.

"Got a whole lotta love!" A marauder yelled, falling on top of Mike, Celestia, and another marauder. Thud.

"Don't leave me hanging!" The remaining marauder yelled, falling on top of the four unfortunate victims of fate. Thud.

An hour later, after Mike returned from the castle...

"So Pinkie Pie, are you sure that this friend of Rainbow Dash is really so mean?" Twilight asked Pinkie Pie, who were at Twilight's house while Mike sat on the staircase listening to the ruckus.

"Um, yeah. She keeps stealing Rainbow Dash away, she pops my balloons, and she told me to buzz off. I've never met a griffon this mean. Well, actually, I've never met a griffon at all, but I bet if I had, she wouldn't have been as mean and grumpy as Gilda."

"You know what I think, Pinkie Pie."

"Hmm?"

"Well, I think... you're jealous."

"Jealous?"

"Green with envy. Well, in your case, pink with envy." Mentioned Spike.

"Well, yes. Jealous. Listen Pinkie, I don't want to upset you, but just because Rainbow Dash has another friend doesn't make Gilda a grump. I mean, perhaps it's you, Pinkie, who needs to improve her attitude."

"Improve my attitude? But I... D... B.. It's Gilda that... D... Are you seri... GAH!" Pinkie Pie stormed out of Twilight's house, while Twilight sighed. Mike got up and started walking to the door.

"Where are you going?" Twilight asked.

"Uhhh... Overseering my base." He was obviously scheming something.

"..."

"Seriously."

"Fine..."

"Aaah! A rattler, a rattler! Run for the hills! Everybody forsake yourselves!" Granny Smith screamed as she ran ridiclously slow to the hills after confusing Gilda's tail for a rattler in the vegetable stand. Gilda popped out with a big smile, but upon noticing that a pony was staring at her, she began 'testing' a tomato with her tail.

"This stuff ain't fresh, dude." She mentioned before walking away. She walked innocently looking around, until she stopped in front of yet another stand. With her tail, while no one was looking, she stole and apple and ate it in a single bite.

Gilda kept walking around town, until a short distance in front of her walked Fluttershy leading a flock of ducks. She didn't change her direction, however, and kept walking until she hit Fluttershy. "Hey!"

"Please excuse me." Fluttershy said.

"I'm walkin' here."

"Oh, um, I'm sorry. I-I-I was just trying to..."

"'I'm sorry, I'm sorry'. Why don't you just watch where you're going, doofus?"

"B-b-b-but I... I..."

Gilda breathed in, preparing to let out a roar with an intensity unheard before, but before she could let it all out in front of Fluttershy, who was already frightened, the ground shook as if a giant was walking towards them.

"Stop right there criminal scum!" A voice that appeared to come out from a radio came out of a tall biped mechanized creature with gatling guns and missile pods, a Terran Viking in its walker form. "Nobody breaks the law on my watch! I'm confiscating your stolen goods. Now pay your fine... Or it's off to jail. --Wait, you already ate that stolen apple." The Terran Viking, with Mike himself piloting it, began revving up its right gatling gun and pushing it towards Gilda. "Regurgitate it and return it to its rightful owner!"

"What."

The Viking signalled Flutershy to go with its left gatling gun, seeing as she was still petrified. "You heard me."

"Ugh, please, all these lame ponies are driving me buggy. I gotta bail." She said as she began taking flight.

"NO!" Mike yelled as he slapped her with his left gatling gun before she could even take off properly, sending her to the ground.

"What the hell is your problem?!"

"You are my problem. You scared Granny Smith... You stole an apple... You almost made Fluttershy cry..." He revved up his gatling gun again and placed it directly in front of Gilda. "You threatened my people with slavery and death!"

"Wait, what?"

"Sorry, got carried away. Anyways! This can only be solved in one way..."

"Oh..." Gilda grinned, standing up. "So you want a fight..."

"I was going to suggest a freestyle breakdance tournament but... That's a good idea too."

"..."

"..."

"A fight it is then. When and where?!"

"In a few hours. No matter what happens, understood? Even if there was somehow a party, we will fight there and then."

"You got it..." Gilda agreed, with her face clashing with the Viking's visor.

And, lo and behold, there was a party. Arranged by Pinkie Pie herself for Gilda. Talk about funny coincidences.

Fast forwarding most of the party since it'd be boring and not time efficient to describe it in detail, Gilda had begun to lose her composure following the many pranks set against her.

"Hey, I'm watching you. Like a hawk." Gilda told Pinkie Pie as she held her with her claws behind the cake, out of everyone's sight.

"Why? Can't you watch me like a griffon?"

"Hey y'all, it's pin the tail on the pony. Let's play." Applejack suggested.

"Oh, my favorite game." Rarity stated. "Can I go first? Can I have the purple tail?"

"Well, I am the guest of honor, and I'll have the purple tail." Gilda said as she quickly grabbed the tail before Rarity could, much to her frustration.

"Yeah, Gilda should definitely go first. Let's get you blindfolded." Pinkie Pie said.

"Hey what-- ugh-- what are you doing? Rrrah!"

"We're spinning you around and around and then you can pin the tail on the pony. Now just walk straight ahead and pin the tail."

"Now just walk straight ahead and pin the tail. Hmph, yeah, right. This is another prank, isn't it? I'm going this way." She stated, walking to the opposite direction.

"Wait. The poster is this--"

"Whoa whaa waah waah waaaaah-- UGH!"

"Uh, Gilda? You pinned the tail on the wrong end." Pinkie Pie stated upon seeing Gilda with a fabulous purple moustache. At this sight, everyone in the room began laughing.

Out of fury, she let out a loud roar. "This is your idea of a good time? I've never met a lamer bunch of dweebs in all my life. And Pinkie Pie, you! You are queen lame-o with your weak little party pranks. Did you really think you could make me lose my cool? Well, Dash and I have ten times as much cool as the rest of you put together. Come on Dash, we're bailing on this pathetic scene. Come on Rainbow Dash. I said, we're leaving."

"You know Gilda, I was the one who set up all those weak pranks at this party." Rainbow Dash stated.

"...What?!"

"Ooh..." Pinkie Pie whispered to herself.

"So I guess I'm queen lame-o."

"Come on, Dash, you're joshing me."

"They weren't all meant for you specifically, it was just dumb luck that you set them all off."

"I shoulda known, that dribble cup had Rainbow Dash written all over it." Pinkie Pie said.

"No way. It was Pinkie Pie, she set up this party to trip me up, to make a fool of me."

"Me? I threw this party to improve your attitude. I thought a good party might turn that frown upside down."

"And you sure didn't need any help making a fool of yourself." Rainbow Dash continued. "You know, this is not how I thought my old friends would treat my new friends. If being cool is all you care about, maybe you should go find some new cool friends someplace else."

"Rrgh. Yeah? Well you, you, you are such a, a flip-flop: cool one minute and lame the next. When you decide not to be lame anymore, gimme a call." She ranted, opening the door and intending to walk out, only to be stopped by the sight of hundreds of mechanized Terran Vikings in their walker forms advancing towards her in the distance, with a cloud of smoke following them. As they got closer, a small earthquake caused by the feet of the Vikings followed them too. Everyone was petrified.

"Gilda!!" Mike yelled from his loudspeaker.

Gilda gave a face of both fury and excitement at the events that'd unfold shortly. She patiently waited for the Viking force to reach her, and once Mike stood in front of her with his vehicle, she stared at him.

"You ready for this?" Mike asked.

"Hah, this'll be easy..." She boasted as she took flight and stared at the Viking forces from above. "You all don't even have wings, how can you expect to win against me when I fly!?"

"Is that so...?" Mike said as he chuckled to himself. "Take it to the skies, brothers!"

At his command, the entire Viking force engaged their transformation modules, changing from walker, to assault mode. The exhaust of their engines as they lifted themselves from the ground burned the grass and earth beneath them, and leaving Gilda with a face of shock as she stared. Mike, now flying at the same level as her, laughed to himself.

"So, what now, griffon?"

"Uhhh..."

"Hear it, guys? She's not backing off. Looks like we have to take decisive action... Lanzer torpedoes, unload on 'er!"

The hundred vikings began shooting their torpedoes against Gilda, who could barely dodge them all at once. Unlike Mike's universe, friendly fire here truly was an issue; half the viking force already fell because the missiles didn't really ignore their brethen. Gilda desperately began retreating while the remaining vikings gave chase, with the ponieson the ground cheering at Mike for expelling the dreaded griffon.

"Spread out, leave no route for escape." He yelled through the radio as he drove the viking, with his hands pressing many buttons of the control board and missiles flying left and right. "Squads Charlie and Delta, take the sides and don't let her turn direc--" He was interrupted by a missile impacting his vehicle. "Watch your fire! Shots do not ignore friendlies! God dammit..."

"Alpha-13 reporting heavy casualties by friendly-- SHIII---" A viking yelled right before a missile accidentally impacted him, sending him flying towards another viking, who shot his missiles against two other vikings by accident.

"You're all god damned idiots!!" Mike yelled. "Shoot that feathered turd, not each other, retards!!"

Back at the "party"...

"I'm sorry everypony, for bringing Gilda here. I didn't know how rude she was. And Pinkie Pie, I'm really sorry she ruined that awesome party you put on for her." Rainbow Dash apologized.

"Hey, if you want to hang out with party poopers, that's your business." Pinkie said.

"I'd rather hang out with you. No hard feelings?"

"No hard feelings."

They both intended of giving eachother a handhoofshake, yet ended up electrocuting eachother in turn. At this, everyone in the room began laughing and enjoying the party once again.

"Hey Pinkie. Sorry I accused you of misjudging Gilda. Looks likes I'm the one who misjudged you." Twilight apologized.

"It's okay Twilight, even you can't be a super smart smarty smart-pants all the time. Come on everypony, there's still a whole lotta party to finish!"

Everyone began cheering.

"Dearest Princess Celestia,

Today I learned that it's hard to accept when somepony you like wants to spend time with somepony who's not so nice. Though it's impossible to control who your friends hang out with, it is possible to control your own behavior. Just continue to be a good friend. In the end, the difference between a false friend and the one who is true will surely come to light.

Your faithful student,

Twilight Sparkle.

P.S.

Mike got these things called 'Vikings'. I mean, giant towering machines that shoot MISSILES. I don't want to know what else he can get..."

"Dear Twilight Sparkle,

My most faithful student--"

"Yo, wrong ink." A marauder spoke next to Celestia right before the ink disappeared, being invisible ink, pointing to the correct jar of ink.

Chapter 6: Thor Busters

"...Come on, Twilight, you can do it!" Spike cheered Twilight, with Mike in the corner just watching.

"Okay, here goes." She lowered her head so that her horn would be pointing at Spike, and began focusing. She then casted a spell on him, which missed, hit the mirror, and in turn struck Mike's face for having his visor up and his face expose. Once the small cloud of smoke dissipated it was revealed that he now had a giant beard and moustache that'd be comparable to those of the dwarves. It was grey, long and wide, and some ends braided. He stroked it as he enjoyed his now full beard instead of his old neckbeard. "Oh, sorry." Twilight perfomed another spell on him, only to be reflected by his visor once he lowered it in a split second. The spell hit the roof, then the mirror, and finally Spike's head, rendering him bald.

"WHAT!?" Spike asked petrified.

"You're not going to tell me you want to keep that, right?" Twilight asked Mike, ignoring Spike's agony. Mike just gave a thumbs up, making Twilight sigh since he was not going to change his opinion on the matter. Then she returned Spike to how he was before.

"Woohoo!" Spike cheered. Now he knew how it felt to be bald.

"Come one, come all! Come and witness the amazing magic of the Great and Powerful Trixie!" A certain blue unicorn with a mane of a lighter shade said right in front of a multitude.

"...For real?" Mike asked to himself with his glorious beard still in place.

"Watch in awe as the Great and Powerful Trixie performs the most spectacular feats of magic ever witnessed by pony eyes!"

"My, my, my! What boasting!" Rarity said.

"Come on, no pony's as magical as Twi-- Twi-- Twi-- Oh!" Spike interrupted himself as he cleaned his throat. "Hey, Rarity, I, uh-- Mustache!" He ran off in an instant.

Time passed as the mane 6 talked among themselves, until Trixie overheard them. "Well, well, well, it seems we have some neighsayers in the audience. Who is so ignorant as to challenge the magical ability of the Great and Powerful Trixie? Do they not know that they're in the presence of the most magical unicorn in all of Equestria?"

"Keep yubbin' that big mouth, while it's still attached to your bloody neck." Mike whispered to himself.

"So, 'Great and Powerful Trixie'. What makes you think you're so awesome, anyway?" Rainbow Dash asked once she flew right in front of her.

"Heh, why, only the Great and Powerful Trixie has magic strong enough to vanquish the dreaded Ursa Major!"

"Wait..." Mike asked Twilight quietly. "What's an Ursa Major?"

"Well... A big bear, sort of." Twilight answered.

"When all hope was lost, the ponies of Hoofington had no one to turn to, but the Great and Powerful Trixie stepped in, and with her awesome magic, vanquished the Ursa Major and sent it back to its cave deep within the Everfree Forest!" Trixie kept boasting.

"Trixie truly is the most talented, the most magical, the most awesome unicorn in Ponyville." Snails added.

"It's true, my enthusiastic little admirers. Trixie is most certainly the best in Ponyville. Don't believe the Great and Powerful Trixie? Heheh, well then, I hereby challenge you, Ponyvillians -- anything you can do, I can do better. Any takers? Anyone? Hmm? Or is Trixie destined to be the greatest equine who has ever lived!?"

"Please! She's unbearable! Ya gotta show her! Ya just gotta!" Spike begged Twilight.

"There's no way I'm going to use my magic now, Spike. Especially since--"

"Hmm, how about you!" Trixie challenged, looking at Twilight's general direction.

"Mike, can Terrans do 'magic'?" Twilight asked forcing a smile and appearing not to talk at all.

"Nope." He answered.

"Well, how about it? Hm? Is there anything you can do that the Great and Powerful Trixie can't?"

"I-- I--" Twilight tried speaking.

"Well, little hairy biped?" She was referring to Mike himself, not Twilight.

"Me?" Mike asked in confusion.

"Yes, you!"

"I don't have time for this load of bull..." He sighed as he turned around and began walking away, with the crowd letting him through and the weight of his armor shaking the ground and leaving giant footsteps.

After a few hours, night already, Mike sat on the staircase of Twilight's house, playing around with his visor's UI, overseering his base thanks to the top-down view he had. Twilight Was busy reading something, all normal for a day, until Spike bursted through the door.

"Twilight, Mike, you've gotta come! Quick!"

"I already told you, Spike, I don't wanna show up Trixie!"

"No, you don't understand, it's--" A loud roar which shook the earth interrupted Spike's explanation, thought it'd be more of an explanation of what was happening by itself. It grabbed both Twilight's and Mike's attention.

"Uh, is that what I think it is?" Twilight asked.

"...Majorly."

"Uh, okay." Trixie nervously said, standing directly in front of the dreaded Ursa Major and gulping. "Stand back." She used her magic to levitate a rope and tying it around the Ursa. "Heh. Piece of cake." But as she finished the Ursa effortlessly broke the ropes that were tied to just two of his fingers.

"Aw, come on, Trixie." Snips said.

"Stop goofin' around and vanquish it, eh?" Snails added.

Trixie tried another tactic. With her magic, she created a dark cloud bearing a thunderstorm in the sky. Unfortunately, it was barely a fraction of the Ursa's size.

"Well, that was a dud." Snails stated disappointed.

"Yeah, pfft, come on! Where's all the cool explosions and smoke--" Snips tried saying, only to be interrupted by the sound and sight of a pair of missiles impacting directly on the Ursa's neck, with a squadron of Vikings making their strafing run. Seconds later, marines, marauders and ghosts led by Mike, with Twilight and Spike following behind him, appeared. Out of fright, both Snips and Snails ran towards the great army, while Trixie escaped to an unknown direction.

"What's going on?!" Twilight asked Snips and Snails while Mike tried dealing with the situation.

"We brought an Ursa to town." Snips proudly stated.

"You what?!"

"Don't worry, the Great and Powerful Trixie will vanquish it." Snails said, oblivious to the situation while staring at Trixie who was barely a few metres away.

"I can't." Trixie said.

"What!?" Both Snips and Snails asked.

"Oh, I can't, I never have. No one can vanquish an Ursa Major. I just made the whole story up to make me look bette--" Trixie said, only to be interrupted by Mike yelling.

"MAKE WAY!! MAKE WAY!! INCOMING!!" Mike screamed at the top of his lungs as he clinged to the rampaging Ursa's neck, as if he was in a bizarre rodeo. The Ursa, running Amok, destroyed buildings and roads alike, while the entire Terran force failed to even harm it, even though they could've drowned the beast with the depleted shells of their ammo. "WHO NEEDS A CAR WHEN I HAVE THIS BAD BOY!!" He yelled, barely being able to actually control what the Ursa destroyed. Emphasis on barely. Unfortunately, the Ursa made a strange movement with enough brutality to send Mike flying to the ground right next to Twilight, digging himself into the earth, just like the time he arrived to Equestria. "Mphmphik..." He tried calling for a medic with his agonyzing voice, yet was muffled by the ground. Spike, upon seeing this, pressured Twilight to take actions.

Twilight stepped forward, unsure. She began focusing, using her magic to guide the wind and, purposefully or not, making music out of a few plants, calming the Ursa. She levitated the beast. Then, she grabbed an old water tank high above, emptied it, and guided it through a barn full of cows. Out of it came out filled with milk. She gave it to the Ursa, calming it further until it was as close to asleep as it could get, levitating it to the cave it came from. Once done, she became exhausted for applying so much effort, but the sight and sound of the ponies and Terrans cheering for her caught her attention.

"I'm sorry. Please, please don't hate me." Twilight asked of them.

"Hate you?" Rainbow Dash, Rarity and Applejack questioned, while Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie and Spike helped Mike out of the ground.

"Why, whatever do you mean, darling?" Rarity asked.

"Well, I know how much you all hated Trixie's showing off with her magic tricks, and I just thought--"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Magic's got nothing to do with it. Trixie's just a loudmouth." Rainbow Dash interrupted.

"Most unpleasant." Rarity added.

"All hat and no cattle." Applejack added further.

"So, you don't mind my magic tricks?" Twilight asked.

"Your magic is a part of who you are, sugarcube, and we like who you are. We're proud to have such a powerful, talented unicorn as our friend."

"And after whuppin' that ursa's hind quarters, we're even prouder." Rainbow Dash stated.

"You are?"

"Mm-hmm." The three of them said in unison.

"Wow, Twilight, how'd you know what to do with that Ursa Major?" Spike asked, with Mike getting the dirt out of his helmet behind him.

"That's what I was doing when you came looking for me. I was so intrigued by Trixie's bragging that I was compelled to do a little reading up on them." Twilight answered.

"So it is possible to vanquish an Ursa Major all by yourself?"

"That wasn't an Ursa Major, it was a baby, an Ursa Mino--" She tried explaining, only for an incredibly loud, ear piercing, horrifying roar in the distance petrified them all. Terran forces and Mike included.

"What... Was that...?" Mike asked, for the first time showing a bit of uneasyness.

"T-that..." Twilight tried saying, but the words couldn't escape from her mouth.

"W-w-what's that?!" Rainbow Dash asked completely dumbfounded and scared off her soul, pointing to the distance where a giant purple figure loomed over, more than five times the size of the Ursa Minor. Every pony began running amok in utter fear while the Terrans asked among themselves what that strange silhouette was. Mike has never seen something like that either, even the mighty Ultralisk paled in comparison.

"Ursa... Major..." The words finally escaped from Twilight's mouth before finally passing out.

"That thing?!" Mike snapped out of his trance as he moved closer to the group. "You know how much disaster the Minor did?!"

"W-what are we going to do now?" Rarity asked.

'Should I say that maybe the gunfire and explosions attracted it because of its baby? ...It'll be a mistery...' Mike thought. He cleaned the sweat off his mouth, and gave a determined look towards the group. "Get everyone to a safe distance. I got this."

"You?!" Rainbow Dash asked. "You couldn't even handle the Ursa Minor and you want to take that thing down?!"

"Not everything in my arsenal has been shown, pegasus." As he said that, several SCVs rushed past him to town, building bunkers, missile turrets and sensor towers everywhere, with several Command Centers flying into position, dropping down, and turning themselves into Planetary Fortresses. The Terrans, now filled with courage of seeing their determined leader knowing what to do, began entering the now-complete bunkers, the empty houses, and all over the town.

"What are you planning then? With all you have here you're dead."

"I just need a bit of time." He said as he walked towards the fortifications and signalling the rest to go, leaving him. He was now with his Terrans looking at the horizon as the Ursa Major kept on advancing towards them at a steady pace, until it entered the range of the sensor towers. "We're in for a wild night..."

A few minutes later. Explosions, gunshots and roars drowned every other sound.

"Twilight? Twilight!!" Spike desperately asked upon seeing her regaining her senses somewhat. Once she woke up, she saw everyone gathering around her with worry in their faces. "Thank Celestia you're alright!"

"Wha... What's going on... --The Ursa Major!! Mike can't--"

"Listen darling, as far as we know he has the most probabilities of doing this."

"He has no chances!! He'll--"

Rarity put her hoof over Twilight's shoulder. "We all know... And what I said is still the truth..."

"He told us to get away." Rainbow Dash added.

"So he's going to...?" Twilight asked, not wanting to finish the sentence.

"He didn't say..." Spike answered. "He just... Told us to go, that he needs time, nothing else... We--"

"THOR IS HERE"

"HIT ME!"

"I HEAR YOU"

"I AM A THUNDERGOD! AND I HURL THUNDERBOLTS!"

"I COULD AIM, BUT WITH THIS THING... I DON'T HAVE TO."

The sudden, almost uncaring chatter in the distance interrupted the overly dramatic moment. Though saying 'killed the moment' would be more appropiate.

"What--" Rainbow Dash tried to ask herself, before being silenced by the sight of ten giant machines, more than twice the size of a Viking, walking towards the battlefield and shaking the ground with their giant feet.

"THUNDER AND LIGHTNING, THIS IS CRAZY!!"

Rainbow Dash flew closer to the giant machines, until she saw the red paint, and most importantly, the Dominion insignia that let her know they were Mike's forces. She flew back to the group of ponies with a smile on her face and announced. "They're Mike's!! He can do it!!"

The ponies cheered to the skies, knowing that hope was not lost.

Meanwhile, in a Thor's cabin...

"I AM HEAVY METAL." The Thor pilot leading the group yelled around, until he drove to the main square where he had a good line of fire against the Ursa Major.

"About damn time you showed up!" Mike said through the radio upon he spotted them. There were Vikings flying around shooting at the Ursa, marines and marauders catapulted towards it, and ghosts just sipping tea as if they didn't even care.

"What happened to you, commander? They got you pushing too many pencils?"

"Yeah yeah, line those things up and fire at the Ursa, prepare the 250mm cannons at my mark!"

"No problem!!" The Thor pilot accidentally stepped into a house, crumbling it, but in turn acquired a good line of fire and stood its ground while the other Thors placed themselves around the Ursa Major. "Ride the lightning!" He yelled as he smahed the 'fire' button, firing his main guns at the Ursa.

Time passed while the ultimate showdown of ultimate destiny took place, the 10 Thors surrounding the Ursa while it was distracted by smashing the bunkers, turrets, marines and marauders that shot at it.

"D'as it! Mark!" Mike yelled through the radio

"DROPPING THE HAMMER..." The Thor pilot answered, smashing the big bad red button with a skull on it with his forehead. The four 250mm strike cannons mounted at the back of every Thor positioned themselves aiming at the Ursa. Then, after a second, all fired at once, unleashing a barrage that blinded and deafened everyone around. Once the barrage was over, the Ursa began falling in slow motion just like the Hindenburg disaster. "Hammer of the Gods!!" The Thor pilot yelled as he put on a pair of sunglasses over his broken pair of sunglasses. The Ursa Major fell on top of another Thor, thus marking the end of the conflict.

"I'm on fire. No, really!!" The unfortunate Thor that got slammed by the Ursa yelled through the radio.

A few hours later, in the first hours of the morning...

"So..." Rainbow Dash began asking.

"The Ursa's unconscious, and since every unicorn knows levitation they're helping Twilight get it to the cave." Spike answered. "I just hope that what Mike did gave that thing amnesia."

"Ragnarok, baby!!" A Thor yelled, shooting at the sky.

"I think we learnt something this day." Spike continued. "We must never piss off Mike."

"Uh-huh." Everyone said in unison.

"Dear Princess Celestia,

I have learned a very valuable lesson about friendship: I was so afraid of being thought of as a showoff that I was hiding a part of who I am. My friends helped me realize that it's okay to be proud of your talents, and there are times when it's appropriate to show them off... Especially when you're standing up for your friends.

And Mike? At first I sincerely thought he was an idiot, but as I get to know him better, I realize he's still an idiot, but a great idiot who's willing to do what others cannot, and for that, we owe him a lot."

"I am the destroyer!" Another Thor yelled, chasing Trixie around. "I am rated T, for Thor!"

Chapter 7: Yamatoshy

"Listen up!" Twilight raised her voice at the ponies, standing over the bridge with Spike. "Smoke is spreading over all of Equestria." At her notice, everyone raised their heads and looked at the sky, seeing a pitch black cloud of smoke looming over. "But don't worry, I've just received a letter from Princess Celestia informing me that it's not coming from a fire. It's coming from a dragon."

The crowd gasped at the announcement that a dragon was near, and began talking among themselves.

"A dragoon?!" Mike yelled, surfacing from the small river and placing his arms on the earth for support. "It's been years since I've last seen one of those four-legged mechanized bastards."

"I said dragon, not dragoon." Twilight had gotten used to the kind of stuff that Mike ended up doing, so she didn't even care about him being in the river. Much less caring about what 'Dragoon' meant.

"Shame... And here I was thinking a protoss managed to get into this world."

"Proto... Anyways!! Mike, we need to go back and we'll discuss with the girls what to do next."

"Fine..."

"What in the name of all things cinnamon swirled is a full-grown dragon doing here in Equestria?" Applejack questioned.

"Sleeping." Twilight answered, only for everyone else to question even further. "According to Princess Celestia, he's taking a nap. His snoring is what's causing all this smoke."

"He should really see a doctor. That doesn't sound healthy at all." Pinkie Pie said.

"Well, at least he's not snoring fire. What are we meant to do about it?" Rarity questioned.

"I'll tell you what we're meant to do. Give him the boot! Take that." Rainbow Dash kicked a wooden decoration. "And that!" She flew in for another strike, only for Twilight to levitate the statue and make Rainbow Dash miss. She, however, ended up ramming her hoof into Mike's visor, breaking it and knocking him unconscious.

"We need to encourage him to take a nap somewhere else. Princess Celestia has given us this mission, and we must not fail. If we do, Equestria will be covered in smoke for the next one hundred years." Twilight explained.

"Hmph. Talk about getting your beauty sleep." Rarity sighed.

"All right everypony, I need you to gather supplies quickly. We've got a long journey ahead of us. Let's meet back here in less than an hour."

"Why don't we just nuke that bastard from orbit?" Mike sighed, pulling Rainbow Dash aside and taking the broken shards out of his visor.

Time later, after the mane 6 finished their semi-cliched team buildup presentation...

Mike kicked Twilight's door open and walked out. "Oh, right, let's have some sort of 'preparation phase' for a dragon. Come on, want me to put the A-team theme for you all too? God damn..."

"All right girls, listen up." Twilight began speaking. "I'm mapping out the fastest route, but we've all got to keep a good pace if we expect to make it up the mountain by nightfall. The dragon is in that cave at the very to--"

"Ride the lightning!!" A thor said, followed by marines, marauders, ghosts and vikings walking behind him, with the earth shaking with their steps.

"Let's go, Hell waits for no one!!" Mike yelled, standing on top of the Thor. Not inside, but directly on top outside over the cockpit.

"That fella seems... Excited 'bout this." Applejack stated.

"Mike..." Twilight sighed. She was more worried about Mike causing more damage than the dragon now.

Time later, Mike, his forces, and the mane 6 began travelling to the mountain. Mike had to take a detour since his forces apparently didn't know how to climb a cliff, with Applejack and Fluttershy following them once Fluttershy became petrified out of fright. Once they caught up with the group, they kept on walking. Also, a small detail: The Thor was too big for the path and fell to its death. What a shame.

They reached a division they had to cross. Several marines and marauders fell to their deaths since no one knew how to jump. A viking tried crossing, almost fell but got stuck into the division, creating some sort of bridge which everyone crossed. Then it fell to its death. What a shame.

At this point Mike was blasting the A-team tune out of another viking's stereo.

They reached an avalache zone. The walked on, until they crossed a tree which Rainbow Dash shook the branches by accident, making a bunch of leaves fall. They fell on Fluttershy and she screamed, only for everything to shake violently. They prepared for an avalanche and braced for impact, but it was the steps of the terran force with Mike leading them the source of the semi-earthquake. Then thanks to that an avalanche of rocks began. Half the terran force died that instant while the others escaped.

What a shame.

Then they reached the cave.

"So many losses to replenish I almost depleted my mineral and vespene gas stockpiles..." Mike sighed.

"...We're here." Twilight stated. "Rainbow Dash, you'll use your wings to clear the smoke."

"Mm-hmm."

"Rarity and Pinkie Pie, you'll create a diversion to distract the dragon if things get a little hairy in there."

Pinkie Pie took out a squeaky toy, only for Rarity to look at her with a strange expression.

"Applejack, you're ready with the apples in case he decides to attack. Mike... Don't do anything."

"Boo..."

"But it shouldn't come to that, because Fluttershy will do what she needs to do to wake him up, and between the two of us, we should be able to get him to understand why he needs to go. Is everypony ready?"

Everyone affirmed. Except for Fluttershy, who was scared beyond imagination.

"Okay then, we're goin' in." Twilight, alone, walked into the cave. Fluttershy had not followed her. "So, what is the best way to wake up a sleeping dragon without upsetting him? Fluttershy? Oh, come on!" She walked outside and dug Fluttershy's head out of the ground. "Come on! We have to do this! We have to do this! Now! Every second longer that dragon sleeps is another acre of Equestria that is covered in smoke!"

"I-- I-- I can't go in the cave."

Everyone sighed in unison.

"Oh, great. She's scared of caves now, too." Rainbow Dash complained.

"I'm not scared of caves, I'm scared of..."

"What's that, sugarcube?"

"I'm scared of..."

"What?" Twilight asked.

"I'm scared of dragons!"

"But Fluttershy. You have a wonderful talent dealing with all kinds of animals."

"Yes, because they're not dragons."

"Oh come on! We've seen you walk right up to a horrible manticore like it was nothing." Rainbow Dash stated.

At this moment, Mike was distracted with his own business. Namely looking at his base through his visor. With his cursor, he selected an SCV, moved him into an open space, and ordered him to construct a certain building, a Fusion Core to be precise, while five other SCVs began constructing starports, with tech-lab addons soon following. Once finished, the five starports lit up and began constructing somethin while the Fusion Core also lit up, researching. Mike smiled behind his visor. Then he selected a few medivacs, loaded an unusually big Thor on them, and ordered them to drop it where he was, along with a few reinforcements.

"Who called in the fleet?" A voice echoed inside his visor, he knew exactly what it meant, and it was precisely what he expected.

At this moment, Rainbow Dash was shot out of the cave like a bowling ball and broke through the others, until she finally struck a rock next to Mike. He raised his visor which revealed he still had his grey dwarven beard with braids, and stared at Rainbow Dash barely conscious. Then he raised his sight to the cave, seeing the dragon already coming out with fury in his eyes, and the remaining four of the mane 6 already frightened beyond imagination. Fluttershy was nowhere in sight.

"What did you ponies do now?" Mike sighed. He was not fazed in the slightest. Once he finished, five medivacs with a bigger than usual Thor and reinforcements arrived.

"O-okay Mike, you can do what you want now!" Twilight yelled.

Mike, calmed as a river and his forces not even caring about anything, walked up to the great thor, climbed it, and entered the open cockpit.

"There ain't no unkickable ass when you got Odin." He said before the cockpit closed shut, and the machine being brought to life.

The dragon just raised an eyebrow at the sight of the terran force, not expecting to see hundreds upon hundreds of soldiers, machinery, and the giant machine right in front of him. His expression, however, was cut short by the first shot of the Odin to his face, causing him to back off a bit but rise again and begin fighting. Infantry shooting from the ground, vikings surrounding the dragon like vultures and shooting their missiles, and the Odin wrestling the dragon face-to-face with its cannons that could be used like makeshift arms. Fire and brimstone flew from the dragon's mouth engulfing the men below, only for even more to arrive by the mountain road and from the medivacs without end. From the looks of it, it was as if no one had the advantage; an entire army of terrans and they barely managed to keep up a fight.

"I've fought probes scarier than you!!" Mike yelled, locked wrestling the dragon while explosions and gunshots deafened everyone. The dragon just stared and grunted before spitting smoke out of its mouth, blinding Mike and kicking him back. "Where's that god damn air support!?" He yelled. He was expecting the cavalry to have arrived already. "That's it, Ghost, nuke it!!"

"Target acquired..." A ghost answered, already cloaked with his laser designator pointed at the dragon. A missile of great size was shot off into the sky in the distance where Mike's base was located and flew its way towards the fight. However, just before impact, barely meters away, an explosion threw the Ghost's laser designator off aim and lost balance, falling to the ground. The laser now pointed inside the cave, and the nuke, like a homing boulder, made a ridiculously sharp turn into the cave, blowing up and creating a huge explosion that blew the cave off the mountain. Now the fight took place on the peak of the mountain, seeing as the former peak disappeared entirely. With the cave, so disappeared the dragon's riches, making him infuriate even further and let out a hellish flame that engulfed most if not all of the terrans. Not surprisingly, reinforcements replaced them almost instantly.

"I have an announcement..." A voice echoed through Mike's radio. "I am drunk!" That characteristic presentation was obvious. The cavalry had arrived.

"What's with all these blinky lights?"

"Let's go this way really really fast. If something gets in out way... Shoot it!"

In the distance, three giant hulking ships of a size unheard of before were seen, though the fight kept going on.

"Nice of you to show up!!" Mike yelled while executing an uppercut on the dragon.

"Flying this low always makes me nervous."

"You know what to do, shoot this bastard down!"

"I am seeing double!! Shoot them both!!" One of the ships affirmed. The three ships now began shooting their entire arsenal at the dragon, only to miss half their shots and end up shooting the terrans too, and breaking part of the mointain itself.

"This battlecruiser shoots! It destroys! But wait, it does more..." Another battlecruiser yelled.

"Prepare the yamato!" Mike yelled, ejecting from the Odin after taking so much damage from the dragon before blowing up.

"The yamato is loaded. And so am I..."

"Shoot it!!"

At his command, one of the ships charged up the Yamato cannon and positioned itself pointing at the dragon, and finally released the charge. But before it could land, the dragon took flight, making the yamato charge hit the mountain and make a good half of it crumble upon itself. Everyone screamed their way down below, though Mike and the mane 6 remained safe in the half that didn't collapse.

"...What do you mean we're out of olives?" A battlecruiser commander spoke to its crew right before the dragon landed right on top of the ship, making it shake violently. "It's a trap! Don't panic, just grab hold of the nearest crew member-- Oh, sorry dear."

The dragon began chewing the battlecruiser's armor until it hit a vital structure, making it cause an explosion that in turn caused secondary internal explosions, which soon enough reached the engines, making the battlecruiser slowly but steadily fall like the Hindenburg accident. "We're going down! Stay with the ship, I'm out! Where's my escape pod?!"

The dragon jumped from the battlecruiser and landed upon the second, making it shake violently just like the first one. "I lost my hat!" The battlecruiser commander yelled. "Swing around, we'll pick it up!!"

"Ah, how exciting!" The third battlecruiser commander yelled before a yamato charge was shot at the dragon, making it fly right towards the mountain and crash-land next to the mane 6 and Mike, who drinking a bottle of Kopru-Cola and watching the spectacle.

The dragon stood up with fury in its eyes, but locked sight onto the mane 6 who were already frightened beyond any equestrian or terran limit, with Fluttershy hiding behind a broken rock. She peeked over it only to see her friends already scared, and with anger, she raised her head at the dragon and took flight. "How dare you... How dare you!" She landed directly on top of the dragon's nose. Now, the entire terran force and the two battlecruisers remaining were just staring at what was happening. "Listen here, mister. Just because you're big doesn't mean you get to be a bully. You may have huge teeth, and sharp scales, and snore smoke, and breathe fire. But you do not-- I repeat-- You do not! Hurt! My! Friends! You got that?"

The dragon whimpered.

"Well?"

"...But that rainbow one kicked me..." The dragon stated while pointing at Rainbow Dash.

At a moments notice, the entire terran force, be it marines, marauders, ghosts, vikings, the two battlecruisers, Mike himself, and even the wreckage of the Odin gathered up around Rainbow Dash, cocked and aimed their guns at her, with a battlecruiser already charging a yamato cannon. Some were aiming, and other were cracking their knuckles and preparing their guns. Rainbow Dash only stared with a horrifying expression.

"And I am very sorry about that." Fluttershy said. Rainbow Dash was desperately flying for her life while every single terran chased her. "But you're bigger than she is, and you should know better. You should also know better than to take a nap where your snoring can become a health hazard to other creatures."

"But I--"

"Don't you 'but I' me, mister. Now what do you have to say for yourself? ...I said, what do you have to say for yourself?"

The dragon whimpered, and not after long, began crying.

"There, there. No need to cry. You're not a bad dragon, you just made a bad decision. Now go pack your things. You just need to find a new place to sleep. That's all."

"Full attack, all weapons!!" A battlecruiser yelled, shooting everything and the escape pods at Rainbow Dash who could barely dodge them all, with vikings already catching up with her.

"Spike, take a letter." Twilight said once reaching her home.

"With pleasure." Spike replied, kicking Angel out the window.

"Dear Princess Celestia,

I am happy to report that the dragon has departed our fair country, and that it was my good friend, Fluttershy, who convinced him to go. This adventure has taught me to never lose faith in your friends. They can be an amazing source of strength, and can help you overcome even your greatest fears.

Always your faithful student,

Twilight Sparkle.

And one last thing, I think we won't be seeing any dragons sleeping around here for a good while. Mike has..." She interrupted herself, staring out the window towards the ridiculously damaged mountain which just now fell on itself like Sauron's Eye's tower in Lord of the Rings. "Destroyed that nest completely..."

Chapter 8: Infested Gossip

"Wow, what a gorgeous day!" Twilight states while staring at the sky, walking around Ponyville with Spike on her back.

"Rainbow Dash must have gotten up early for once and cleared all the clouds away." Spike said.

"I bet all of Ponyville is going to be out enjoying the sunshine." She saw no one around. "What? Where is everypony?"

"Is it some sort of pony holiday?"

"Not that I know of."

"Does my breath stink?"

"Not more than usual."

"Is it... zombies?!"

"Uh... not very likely."

"Not likely... but possible?"

Twilight kept on walking trying to figure out what was happening, but narrowed her eyes in irritation once she saw a Thor hiding behind a tree that wasn't even a fifth of its size.

"Mike..." She sighed.

"Psst!" A voice came out of a building right next to the Thor. "Twilight! Spike! Come here!" It appeared to be Pinkie Pie. "Come! Here! Hurry! Before she gets you!"

Twilight just stared dumbfounded, Spike sharing the expression, but not after long a Viking flew down from the sky, crashlanded right behind Twilight, and with the momentum of the flight, drove both Twilight and Spike right into the building. It could be said most of the wall disappeared.

"Wooooah!!" Spike yelled, flying into the room and landing on the floor right next to the crushed Viking.

"Pinkie, what are you doing here alone in the dark?" Twilight asked.

"Yo what's up." Mike said, playing Alone In The Dark for the Koprustation 2.

"I'm not alone in the dark." Pinkie answered. Twilight looked around and saw that pretty much everyone was here.

"Okay then, what are you all doing here in the dark?"

"We're hidin' from her!" Applejack stated, moving towards the window where marines and marauders grouped up looking outside, and pointed at the strange being outside.

"I got this... I got this!!" Mike yelled as he travelled on the side of a building in Alone in the Dark. "I got t--NOOO!!" His fell to his death.

"Will you cut that out?" Twilight said after eveyone talked about Zecora, Mike of course being oblivious of the situation.

"Just look at those stripes! So garish!" Rarity stated.

"She's a zebra."

"A what?!" Every pony asked with surprise.

"A zebra, and her stripes aren't a fashion choice Rarity, they're what she was born with."

Rarity fainted.

"Question, what exactly is a Zebra?" Mike asked, turning around since the screen of the TV already flared of 'GAME OVER'.

"A zebra... Well... It'd be easier to say a pony that's black and white."

"...Michael Jackson?" A ghost asked.

"Just look out the window and you'll see what a zebra is!!"

The ghost stood up, walked to the window, stared outside for a moment, and then returned to his seat. "I don't see it dancing 'Thriller'."

Twilight sighed in annoyance.

"I say we shoot it just to be sure. And then shoot it again just to be sure. Again." A marine suggested while preparing his gun.

"What's that thing doing anyways? Digging the earth?" Another marine asked.

"It's sign language." A marauder replied.

"What? What's it saying?" The marine asked.

"It says it wants some good ol' fashioned cola."

The marine loaded his gun and shot the marauder. No one minded.

"Hey! Where's Apple Bloom?" Applejack asked.

"The door's open." Fluttershy noticed.

"She went outside!" Rarity stated.

"And Zecora's still out there." Rainbow Dash said.

"That silly lil' filly! I told her to stay put!" Applejack worried.

"Spike, you stay here in case Apple Bloom comes back." Twilight ordered before everyone left, with a Thor destroyed the remaining parts of the house as it stepped outside.

"Will do!"

"Apple Bloom?" Applejack, with the rest of the mane 6 and the Terran forces behind her, loudly asked upon seeing Applebloom entering the Everfree Forest. "You get back here right now!"

"Beware!" Zecora began warning the group. "Beware, you pony and overdeveloped hairless ape folk! Those leaves of blue are not a joke!"

The marines and marauders began shooting to no effect, the fog had become too thick. The rest of the ponies also began speaking out against Zecora over eachother, with the exception of Twilight.

"Can't see shit, captain!!" A marauder yelled.

"Who the Hell ordered you guys to shoot!?" Mike yelled, making everyone stop shooting.

"You told us all to shoot everything by default, remember?" A ghost reminded him.

"Oh yeah... That's right!"

"Oh brother." Twilight sighed in annoyance.

"Beware! Beware!" Zecora kept warning them, disappearing out of sight.

Applejack talked with Applebloom while everyone flamboyantly pranced around the blue flowers, then they all returned home.

One bizarre dream later...

"Ah pfurse!" Pinkie Pie yelled at Twilight.

"A purse? How could it be a purse?" Spike questioned.

"Pinkie? What happened?" Twilight asked.

"Pee pah Zthecora! Sthe put a cursthe on me!"

"Hey, say it, don't spray it, Pinkie!" Spike said upon being showever by Pinkie's spits.

"Ow!" Rainbow Dash grunted, trying to get into Twilight's house by the window, yet unable to due to her wings malfunctioning and impacting against several objects instead. "Ow! She's-- trying to say-ow!- Zecora-- ow!-- she slapped us all with a-ow- curse!"

"I'm afraid I have to agree." Rarity, who now looked like a cheap carpet, stated while blowing the hair out of her face.

"I hate to say I told ya so, Twilight, but I told ya so!" Applejack, with a high pitched voice, told her so. Upon closer inspection, her size was ridiculous smaller than before. "It's a curse, I tells ya!"

"But Fluttershy... seems just fine!" Twilight said.

"Yes, there doesn't seem to be a thing wrong with her." Rarity agreed.

"Fluttershy?" Twilight asked. "Are you okay? Is there something wrong with you?" Fluttershy nodded. "Would you care to tell us?" Fluttershy shook her head. "So... you're not gonna to tell us?" She nodded. "Yes you're not, or yes you will?

"Good gravy, girl! What's wrong with you?!" Applejack hurried her.

"I don't want to talk about it." Fluttershy answered in a voice even deeper than a marauder's.

But before Spike could burst out in laughter, thuds could be heard coming from the front door which was now closed. Then from the walls, then from the ceiling, everywhere. And then moans of pain and exhaustion could be heard.

"Z-zombies!!" Spike yelled before running upstairs. "Zombies everywhere!!" He said running downstairs.

"W-what...?" Twilight asked herself dumbfounded. "Wait, where's Mike?! He was with us when we saw Zecora!!" She walked to a window to look at the comotion outside, but before she could have a good look a Terran marine banged its head against the window. A marine with broken visor, with rotten skin and what appeared to be tentacles sprouting out his armor. And its eyes were dark yellow. "AAH!" Twilight jumped back due to the fright.

"Move it! Move it dammit!" A voice was heard outside. "Yeah sure you all walk slow as hell but that ain't no excuse to stand around like damned idiots. Right, thanks." A second later, soft knocks on the door left everyone dumbfounded while the thuds all over the place like a zombie apocalypse didn't even stop.

Spike walked over and opened the door, revealing Mike with the same traits of the other marines.

"Yo what's up?" He greeted before walking inside, completely calm. He then walked over in front of Twilight. "I'm gonna be fair with you. I'm ridiculously close from breaking my agression inhibitor, so I'll be nice. What. Just. Happened?"

"Those zombies are yours?" Spike asked.

"YOU SON OF A--AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH" His agression inhibitor blew up, sending an electric pulse that knocked him out.

"Well... There's Mike..." Twilight sighed.

Spike just bursted out laughing due to the events that took place.

"This is no joke, Spike. Now start looking for more books so I can find a cure!"

"I think we'll find a cure to this curse at Zecora's place!" Rainbow Dash said.

"It's not a curse!"

"I agree with Dash! We'll go to Zecora's and force her to remove this hex!" Applejack added.

"It's not a hex either!"

"I don't care what you say, Twilight." Rainbow Dash retorted. "It's time to pony up and confront Zecora. Come on, girls. Are you with me?"

"Ah am-pft!" Pinkie Pie tried saying.

"And I as well." Rarity confirmed.

"Uh, I don't know. Seems awfully dangerous." Fluttershy said in her deeper-than-marauder voice.

"How about you, Applejack?" Rainbow Dash tried asking, only to find out that she was nowhere to be seen. "Applejack?"

"Pf-she's gone-pft!" Pinkie Pie alerted.

"Aah! Or somepony stepped on her!" Rarity gasped.

"Yo, she went that way with Applebloom." An infested marine informed them while pointing at the Everfreeforest.

Time later outside Zecora's hut, after a disastrous yet hilarious trip...

"Oh. I look horrible!" Rarity stated upong realizing that she was covered in mud and branches.

"Plis place plooks horrible!" Pinkie Pie said.

"Oh my." Rarity added once Pinkie Pie lifted her hair, allowing her to see the hut. "That place really does look horrible. Nice decorations, if you like creepy!"

By now, they were staring through the window, almost in time for Zecora's arrival. Zecora entered her hut with a vase, and threw its contents into a boiling cauldron while speaking in her native language.

"I don't understand this negro language." An infested marine stated.

"Yo, that's racist." Another infested marine answered.

"Guy's an ex-confederate, it's almost a requirement of survival for him to be racist." Yet another infested marine answered.

"Touche."

While Zecora wasn't looking, an infested marine broke through the roof by sheer dumb luck and fell right into the cauldron. It didn't scream of pain nor tried to escape. "Needs more cinnamon." He said.

"Cinnamon... Of course. Now, where could that pony Applebloom be?" Zecora said. But not a second later she could hear the moans of pain and exhaustion of the infested Terrans saying 'Zecora...' all over the place outside. "I-It's a zombie apocalypse! The mayans were right!!"

"Uhhh... Mike?" Twilight asked outside.

"Yeah?" Mike answered, drinking a can of Kopru-Kola(tm) next to her.

"We're supposed to make her cure us, not scare her to death."

"Only the dead can know peace from this evil."

She sighed. Mike sighed too in annoyance before grabbing an infested marine by the legs, spinning him around and hurling him right into the hut, breaking a giant hole in it. The poor infested marine impacted on the cauldron, sending the other infested marine that was trapped inside right at the wall. "Needs more salt." The infested marine said.

"Cinnamon." The other argued.

"Salt!"

"Cinnamon!"

"Salt!!"

"What about cheese?" An infested marine clinging from the ceiling suggested.

"Cheese seems nice."

"Cheese, of course, why didn't I think of that earlier?"

"I'm about to drop the hammer and dispense some indiscriminate *justice***!!" Mike yelled, entering through the hole he created.

"What's the meaning of this?!" Zecora asked.

"You want to know the meaning of this?! I'll show ya the meaning of---GAAAAHMAHINHIBITOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRR--dead." He fell unconscious.

"We're onto you Zecora. I didn't want to believe that you cursed us, but the evidence is overwhelming!" Twilight accused her.

"How dare you! You destroy my home, destroy my work. Then rudely accuse me of being a jerk?" Zecora retorted.

"You put this curse on us, now you're gonna uncurse us." Rainbow Dash said.

"It is unwise to venture down this road. Your actions will make my anger explode!"

"Where is Applebloom?!" Twilight asked with fury. And then Applebloom entered the room.

"Zecora! I think I found all the things ya asked for. What in Ponyville is goin' on here? Oh, hey Mark. --I mean Mike."

"Yo AB." Mike greeted her before falling unconscious again with smoke coming out of his ears.

"Apple Bloom! You're okay!" Applejack gasped.

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"Because Zecora is an evil enchantress who cursed us and was gonna cook you up into soup!" Twilight stated.

"That soup needed more cinnamon, by the way."

"And salt."

"And cheese." The three infested terrans added, while the remaining hundred infested terrans just walked around like zombies.

"Hahah, Oh Twilight. Did those silly fillies finally get in yer head? You know there's no such thing as a curse."

"Apple Bloom, sweetie. You can't just stand there and tell me this isn't a curse."

"This isn't a curse."

"If you will remember back, the words I spoke were quite exact." Zecora said.

"It was a warnin'. About that blue plant. It's called Poison Joke."

"That plant is much like poison oak. But its results are like a joke."

"What in the hay does that mean?" Applejack asked.

"It means this plant does not breed wrath. Instead this plant just wants a laugh."

"... Will somepony please talk normal?"

"I think what she's saying is that when we ran in to save Apple Bloom, we ran into the poison joke. All our problems are just little jokes that played on us." Twilight stated.

">Little" Applejack said.

"Ok, fine. But what about the cauldron?" Rainbow Dash asked.

"And the chanting?" Marauder-Fluttershy asked.

"And the creepy decor?" Rarity added the barrage of questions.

"Those blue flower things played jokes on you with that hocus pocus genetical DNA manipulation that not even the Protoss understand. The decoration was of her native land. The chanting was some sort of nursing rhyme. The caldron was the bubble bath cure. Get on with it." The author of the fanfic hurried them.

"Yes, get on with it!" The proof reader agreed.

"Yes!! Get on with it!!" The readers agreed even further.

Time later, the mane 6 and the Terran forces were tasked with another thing. Finding the medicinal herbs to end their 'joke' suffering. From Ponyville everyone saw several silhouettes in the horizon, which were no other than the mane 6 and the Terrans, with an infested marine blasting the A-Team from a radio. The ridiculously slow walk speed of the infested marines added a slow motion effect that made this turn into a great sequence.

Everyone in Ponyville was still scared beyond imagination though.

Dear Princess Celestia,

My friends and I all learned an important lesson this week: Never judge a book by its cover. Someone may look unusual, or funny, or scary. But you have to look past that and learn who they are inside. Real friends don't care what your "cover" is; It's the "contents" of a pony that count. And a good friend, like a good book, is something that will last forever. Your faithful student, Twilight Sparkle.

Did I mention Mike almost started a Zombie Apocalypse?

Chapter 9: Hellion of the Century

Mike stood right next to a door outside, with a few marines next to him, as if they were getting to breach into a building like a US procedure in Iraq. With a hand movement, he commanded two marines to get to the other side of the door, so as to have an equal number of troops on each side outside. "I want this room cleaned, understood? Nothing remaining."

"Yes sir!" The marines responded.

"Alright, on my mark..." He took a deep breath, quickly moved right in front of the door and kicked it open, causing great noise. "Get to it!!" He yelled, moving out of the way.

Right next to him charged no less than 10 marines, equiped with top-of-the-line armament, such as mops, buckets, bleach, and aprons. They were going to clean that room alright.

"How's it going?" Twilight asked Mike, seeing as she was monitoring everything for Celestia's visit.

"Why are we doing this again?"

"Well, duh, royalty's going to arrive!!"

"And that means..." He asked in irritation, waving his hand in the air.

"Agh!! Just-- Just make sure everything's clean, alright?! We don't--"

"Stray bucket!! Get down!!" A marine yelled from inside, right before a stray bucket flew right out of the window, breaking it. Twilight just grunted in annoyance and decided to walk away, her nerves were getting defeated just by standing around Mike or any other Terran.

A day later, in the early hours of the morning...

Twilight began waking up thanks to several strange noises around her bed. Namely, of several 'things' snoring. She tried opening her eyes, but as soon as she barely opened one, her eyes shot wide open upon the sight of several, almost a hundred parasprites around her. She remember how she only got one thanks to Fluttershy, yet was completely shocked at both the numbers, and at the fact that they appeared out of nowhere.

"Spike!" She yelled, before falling off her bed and then rushing to Spike's. "Wake up! What happened?!"

Spike woke up, with the parasprites over his eyes coincidentially opening their eyes with him. He screamed, and then threw the parasprites over his eyes away. "What's going on?!"

"Where did they come from?!"

"I don't know. The little guy got hungry in the night, so I gave him a snack, but... I have no idea where these others came from!"

"Gaaaah!!" A marauder yelled, being thrown out the window by a parasprite swarm.

"God damned flying mini zerglings!!" A marine yelled while running from yet another small swarm.

"Get me out of this!!" Mike screamed, flying around, swung by the parasprites.

"I got this..." A ghost whispered to himself, aiming the laser pointer of a nuke at the floor, before his aim was thrown away by Mike being catapulted right at him by the parasprites. An explosion was heard far away, yet no signs of exactly where the nuke landed were shown.

A few minutes later...

Mike and a group of Terrans escorted a makeshift convoy made out of wheels and viking hulls, with parasprites encased in them. Twilight leaded them from the front, with an expression of annoyance for having to always ask Mike for help, even though she found him annoying.

"I see we're having the same problem..." Rarity told Twilight as she appeared, carrying two bags full of parasprites. At this sight, the convoy stopped for a rest.

Soon enough, Rainbow Dash flew right into everyone's sight escaping from a horde of parasprites in any way she could.

"Fluttershy knows everything about animals," Twilight stated, "I'm sure she can tell us how to stop them from multiplying."

Meanwhile, after the convoy arrived in front of Fluttershy's house...

Mike walked over to the house's door and knocked a few times. Not a second later, an entire swarm bursted through the door and escaped outside, pushing through Mike who just stood there, not even flinching. Once he turned around, after everything calmed down a bit, it was shown how his entire front was just a simple skeleton due to the tremendous damage he received.

"Yo it's alright I still got 1HP left." He said while giving a thumbs up. Hell knows how he talked, seeing as he didn't even have lungs now.

A second later, a medivac popped up and started healing him, magically regenerating his organs, skin, eyes, and finally power armor to tip-top conditions in a green light not unlike UFO movies, with medical crosses floating around.

Everyone stared in unison.

"Do something Fluttershy, can't you control them?" Twilight asked, breaking the not-so-silence.

"I've tried everything I know: I've tried begging, and pleading, and beseeching, and asking politely and..."

Mike slapped his visor in annoyance, seeing as he'd have to get something out of his arsenal once again to save the day. He began walking away, leaving the others to their bussiness and headed off to his base.

Meanwhile, at his base...

"How many factories we got?" He asked an SCV.

"Uhh, only one. We just built it to get the starports." He said, pointing at a factory that crash-landed, engulfed in flames. A second later, it exploded.

"..."

"..."

"Well, build more then!"

"How many?"

"Uhhhh... I dunno. Pick a number between 20 and 30."

"27."

"There's your answer. Get the others working."

"You got it. Reactors or Tech labs?"

"Reactors."

140 seconds later... Okay, maybe a bit more.

The mane 6 were already rolling up a big bad ball of parasprites, leading them to the Everfree Forest not unlike a Katamari Damacy game session. Once they were halfway there, they met with Mike's Hellions, a force of 54 armored cars with flamethrowers strapped on them.

"Fancy meeting you lot here." Mike taunted from inside his own hellion, the hellions now following them and making sure no parasprite escaped.

"Fancy?! Where were you all this time?!" Twilight yelled.

"You didn't even notice I was gone?!" He retorted. "Dammit, mare! Anyways, you lot got this or what?"

"We ain't havin' no problems yet." Applejack answered.

"We'll keep you company until this gets done then."

They kept on leading the big bad paraspripteball until they reached the Everfree Forest, now letting the giant bowling ball let it drive its course towards it.

"We did it!" Twilight cheered.

"Couldn't 'ave done it without ya." Applejack said.

Back in front of Fluttershy's home...

"Okay, everyone knows what to do, right?" Twilight asked. "We gotta work extra hard to make up for lost time."

She opened the door, and out of it were shot another full swarm of parasprites.

"Oh for Pete's sake, you guys!!" Mike ranted. "That's it, I'm out." He said as he walked again once more.

Back in Ponyville...

"Well, parasprite over here, parasprite over there..." Mike noted as he walked around, drinking a Kopru-Cola. "Day's been normal so far. Wonder how long it'd take for them to eat everything." He sipped his bottle. "Gee, it'd sure be disastrous if they ended up eating everything else instead of food."

A spell that Twilight casted later, lo and behold, they began eating everything but the food.

"Oh come on!!" He yelled. The hellions at his command arrived right next to him, and so he jumped into one of them, commandeering it. "This thing got Pre-Igniters?" He asked around.

"Sure does, boss." A hellion answered through the radio.

"Daylight's burning!!" He yelled, taking control of the wheel and driving full speed.

A few seconds later, the entire hellion force was scattered driving around Ponyville, throwing flames at any parasprite caught in their sights. It worked at the beginning, frying them and turning them into a piece of charcoal with wings.

"How's everything?" Mike asked through the radio.

"We got everything roasting, boss! At this pace we'll be done in no time!!"

"Nothing like brute force to solve everything. Hey!" He noticed a parasprite running around. He began driving full force towards it in pursuit. "You cannot escape me!!" He yelled. Once he got close enough, he activated his flamethrower at it. The parasprite, however, turned around and outright ate the flames, burping out no less than five other parasprites. "WHAT." He stared dumbfounded, before deciding to turn around and drive towards Twilight who was in the main square.

Once he arrived, he opened the window and yelled at her. "Excuse me, what is this shit?!" He asked, pointing at a hellion frying a parasprite, yet the parasprite was actually eating the flames.

"Uhhh... I... Ehhh...." Twilight was left speechless.

"You know what? I'm gone." He said, closing the window. "To all hellions, leg it!! Or wheel it, whatever." He said through the radio, thus marking his retreat. "Just what the hell's going on..." He asked himself behind his steering wheel, driving to a location in his mind. "Maybe she knows what to do..." And by 'She', he meant Pinkie Pie herself.

Time later, still in Ponyville...

Twilight returned from her visit to Zecora, yet holding no fruit of research. She did not find anything of use to fight against the parasprite menace. But her torment didn't end yet. When she looked at the skies, she noticed how Celestia's carriage was finally in sight, thus telling her that time was short, if not up already. She reached the main square of Ponyville, still seeing the disaster all over the place, and finding no way to revert it.

"Okay, here's the plan." She was losing her mind already. "Rainbow Dash, you distract them."

Rainbow Dash was rather busy escaping from the parasprites.

"Good! Everyone else, we need to build an exact copy of Ponyville right over there. We've got less than a minute." She mindlessly suggested just as a building fell over. What she didn't notice, however, were the hellions returning and surrounding Ponyville, as if preparing for a siege. And they didn't have flamethrowers, they had something else... "Zecora was right, we're doomed." She finally accepted her fate. Once she heard a strange noise that echoed all over ponyville, she realized something. "Oh no, the princess's procession is here... It's all over...!"

The strange noise, that actually sounded like static, ceased to be. But right after that, a voice echoed around Ponyville. It didn't come from one place either, it was as if it came from everywhere, as if it either originated from one's mind, or if the source was from all over the place. The voice wasn't a normal voice either, it sounded as if it was amplified, or distorted. As if it came from so far away the buildings and roads distorted it with echo, but it could be heard clearly. And not only that, the tremendous force of the voice could also be felt as if it exploded in everyone's hearts. It was not an exaggeration to say that the tiny bits of debris actually shook that moment.

"Show me what passes for guitar solos among your misbegotten kind!!"

The voice was no other than Mike. And the source, no less than a hundred hellions with giant loudspeakers replacing their flamethrowers. Right after it, a great electric guitar could be heard now playing it as if the Gods themselves willed it. Then, drums. And then, the main voice.

"You can't kill the metal... The metal will live on!!"

The song was now clear. It was 'The Metal'. And if it wasn't enough, it was actually Mike himself playing the guitar, and Pinkie Pie on the drums.

"W-- What?" Twilight asked herself, dumbfounded, with the earth below her shaking. "Mike?! Pinkie?!" She now came to her senses. "What are you two doing?! Celestia's here and you're doing this?!" She, of course, knew they couldn't hear her. But after a second, she noticed how the parasprites were not devouring everything in their path, just flying up and down at the song's pace.

The source of the sound began moving, the hundred hellions relocating near Mike and Pinkie Pie, now forming a makeshift Metal convoy, with the parasprited following them. They all began moving towards the forest, with the parasprites now following behind for the sound, and behind them the rest of the mane 6 utterly confused.

Then, Celestia's carriage landed. The rest of the mane 6 rushed to her presence.

"Twilight Sparkle, my prized pupil."

"Hello, princess."

"So lovely to see you again, as well as your friends."

Both Celestia's and the ponies' attention was for a second focused upon Mike, Pinkie, and his Metal convoy.

"So... how was the trip? Hit much traffic?"

"Ah, what is this? Oh ho ho, these creatures are adorable."

"They're not that adorable." Rainbow Dash muttered.

"I'm terribly honored that you and the good citizens of Ponyville have organized a parade in honor of my visit, with a rather... Unorthodox musical choice."

"Parade? Oh. Yes, the parade."

"Unfortunately, that visit is going to have to wait for another time. I'm afraid an emergency has come up in Fillydelphia. Apparently there's been some sort of infestation."

"An... infestation?"

"Yes, a swarm of incredibly bothersome creatures has invaded the poor town. I'm sorry Twilight, to have to put you all through so much trouble."

"Trouble? What trouble?"

"Before I have to go, would you care to give me your latest report on the magic of friendship in person?"

"My... report?"

"Haven't you learned anything about friendship?"

"Actually, I have... I've learned that sometimes the solution to your problems can come from where you least expect it. It's a good idea to stop and listen to--"

"THE METAL!!" Mike yelled while riding a hellion around, still playing his electric guitar, with another hellion with a marine riding on top of it playing the electric triangle soon followed.

"Mike!!" Twilight yelled in frustration.

Chapter 10: Reaper Wrap-up

"Spike, wake up!" Twilight said with excitement upon waking up. "Wake up, wake up, it's Winter Wrap Up day!"

"Huh... Mommy?" Spike answered half asleep.

"Winter Wrap up!"

"You're not mommy..."

"'Sup?" Mike questioned, leaning out of the bathroom door with a toothbrush in his mouth. He had no idea what Winter Wrap Up meant.

"The first day of spring is tomorrow, so every pony in Ponyville needs to clean up winter. Now help me get ready."

"Clean up winter? Who cleans up winter?" Both Spike and Mike asked at the same time.

"Don't they just use magic to change the seasons like they do in Canterlot?" Spike added.

"No Spike, Ponyville was started by Earth ponies, so for hundreds of years they've never used magic to clean up winter. It's traditional."

"It's ridiculous. No magic... Fuh." Spike ranted before going back to sleep. Mike just scratched his cheek and kept on brushing his teeth.

"Okay, let's see: scarf, check; saddle, check; boots, check; Spike refusing to get up and going back to sleep, check; Mike doing something illogical like brushing his teeth in the middle of the night instead of sleeping, check. It's a good thing I'm so organized, I'm ready! Bright and early!" She flamboyantly boasted as she opened the door. It was the middle of the night. "Oh... maybe a little too early."

[ThemeSong+Intro.wmv]

"Thank you everypony, for being here bright and early." Mayor Mare said in front of everyone.  "We need every single pony's help to wrap up winter, and bring in spring."

At this, the ponies started cheering.

"Now, all of you have your vests, and have been assigned to your teams, so let's do even better than last year, and have the quickest Winter Wrap Up ever! Any questions before we start?"

"Yeah, one question." Mike said as he raised his hand. "What am I supposed to do?"

Everyone was silent.

"...Well... We don't really have a vest big enough for you, and it'd be too difficult to find you a proper job so... I don't know, just rest?"

"Alright, fantastic." He answered tremendously straightforward before leaving.

Meanwhile, a few minutes later at the Hall of Justice, AKA Twilight's house.

"Alright, where's my gear..." Mike asked himself while looking around. Just as he was crouched opening a drawer a noise came to his attention from outside. He closed the drawer quickly, stood up, ran up to the window with his power armor clanking, and looked outside so see earth ponies, unicorns and pegasi moving around.

'Winter Wrap-up, Winter Wrap-up...!'

They were singing.

Mike quickly closed the visor of his helmet and began listening to music of his own. Even though pastel-coloured ponies with the mental capability to engage in a song out of the blue with perfect synchronization was a sight to behold, he had more important priorities. Like finding his gear.

Time later he found what he looked for in his base behind Twilight's house. He had no idea why he was searching in there to begin with.

Meanwhile, in the frozen lake...

"OH BOY--" Pinkie just managed to say before Twilight, who lost control of her iceskates, impacted against her and send them both screaming all the way to the edge, where they crashed against the snow.

"Ha ha, you are a natural, Twilight. A natural disaster!" Spike laughed after removing the snow that covered him.

"Twilight, you did a great job your first time around. I'm sure my first time was just as wobbly and bobbly and crasheriffic as yours." Pinkie reassured her.

"Really?" Twilight asked.

"No."

Spike chuckled. Twilight lowered her vision, but once she raised it again she noticed something weird in a hill covered by snow. She'd have shrugged it off as another pony, seeing as the sun behind it clouded her vision, but the figure was too tall. She, with Spike and Pinkie, focused their eyes upon it, until they clearly saw what it looked like. It had Ghost armor like what Mike used before, but instead of the usual helmet, it had a gasmask. And a dark brown hooded cloak.

"Is that... Another of Mike's boys?" Spike asked.

"I think so..." Twilight answered.

The figure stomped on the surface where he stood, revealing that he was actually standing on something. The back of the object grew brighter and brighter until flames escaped from it, propelling the object and him downhill, right at their direction at a considerable speed.

Pinkie, Twilight and Spike gave a sudden yell as they threw themselves aside, dodging the figure who appeared to be a Terran. Once they came to their senses, they looked back at the frozen lake and saw the figure standing upon the ice. Right on top of a crack, with what appeared to be the jetpack which he was standing on still functioning and warming the ice.

"'Sup?" The Terran greeted them as he turned around.

"Mike?!" Twilight asked.

"The one and only!!" He boasted.

"What are you doing here?!"

"What, you expect miss the opportunity to entertain myself?"

"Agh..."

"What's that thing?" Spike asked upon seeing what Mike stood on top on.

"This thing?" He asked as he raised a leg and looked below. "It's a jetpack. Reapers are supposed to use them on their backs, but I gave it a little tweak and now I have a rocket-propelled snowboard. Cool, huh?"

"Sweet!"

"Anyways, what were you guys doi--" He was cut short by being immediately sunk into the frozen water, the ice broken.

Pinkie, Spike and Twilight were speechless.

"So... Who's going to get him out of there?" Twilight asked.

'Research complete.' They could hear echoing in the distance, right before Mike bursted through the ice with his snowboard-jetpack ejecting yet more flames than before, then landing right next to them with the snow melting below him. "Good ol' fashioned nitro pack."

"Mike, we're not supposed to use magic today!!"

"Magic? You think this is magic?" He asked while kicking the jetpack. "This is science!!" As soon as he finished, he drifted through the snow, sliding away at a tremendous speed.

"Mike... One of these days..." She sighed, covered in charcoal.

Time later, after several of Twilight's failed attempts to help.

"Go!" Applejack urged Rainbow Dash.

"Stop!" Fluttershy said.

"Go!"

"Stop!"

"GO!"

"STOP!"

"Oh! What in Equestria are all you arguing about? This sort of silliness is why we were late for spring last year, and the year before that, and the year before that!" Mayor Mare ranted.

"Did she say... Late?" Twilight asked herself out of a bush.

"I was hoping my amazingly inspirational speech would urge everyone to do better than last year, but now it looks like we're going to be later than ever. I mean just look at this catastrophe. The ice scorers made the ice chunks too big to melt; the nest designer is horrendously behind, we need several hundred, and she's only made one. And don't get me started on all the clouds in the sky, the icicles on the trees... This isn't good, not at all!"

"And it's gonna be all to pieces disastrous if we can't get our seeds all planted." Applejack said.

"Chillax Applejack, we're bustin' our chops as fast as we can." Rainbow Dash reassured her.

"No, not fast, we have to wake animals slowly." Fluttershy warned them.

"Uh, AJ?" Big Mac asked.

"Oh good gravy, Caramel lost the grass seeds again, didn't he?"

"Eeyup."

"Ditzy Doo accidentally went north to get the southern birds!" A pegasus told Rainbow Dash.

"Oh that featherbrain. Didn't she learn her lesson last year when she went west?"

"Stop this at once. We don't have time to argue. It's almost sundown. Spring is going to be late again. Another year of scandal and shame. If only we could be more organized." Mayor Mare ranted.

"Spike! Get my checklist and clipbo--" Twilight urged Spike, just before being interrupted by another event.

"Where's Mike? I think we'll need his help after all." Mayor Mare added.

"What?!" Twilight ranted to herself.

"Someone called?" Mike, with 7 other reapers asked from the roof of the town hall. Everyone was speechless for a second.

"...What were you doing up there?" Mayor Mare asked.

"Well..." Mike turned his sight back, seeing another 7 reapers with reflectors sunbathing behind him. Hell knows why, since they had their armor on and absolutely no skin showing. Then, he turned his sight back at the Mayor. "...Anyways, you need me for something?"

"Yes. I was told you are the leader of those... Creatures, Terrans I think they're called. Are you willing to help us with Winter Wrap Up?"

"I don't know..." He said as he thought so himself while staring at the scenery around, figuring he'd have to apply a considerable amount of effort. "Say, what if--" He spoke as he leaned further towards the edge, only to lose balance and desperately try clinging to the parapet, unsuccessfully. "--MAYDAY--" He yelled as he fell below before impacting against the floor. "...Agh... Thank God for no collision damage..." Soon enough, the reapers descended below, their fall slowed by their jetpacks.

The ponies started arguing among themselves, seeing as most would not trust Mike and his Terrans with this, but others figuring there was no other solution. They all remember that the town was almost destroyed several times, and a dragon nest completely obliterated, just by Mike's intervention.

"Stop everypony." Twilight said, walking into the group. They didn't stop. "Stop!" They still didn't stop. Then she had the brilliant idea to use a bird as a whistle. They stopped. "Sorry." She apologized to the bird. "I know you all want to complete your jobs on time, but arguing is no way to go about it. What you need is organization, and I'm just the pony for the job."

"Why don't we use fire? There's snow everywhere anyways!" A reaper yelled from the roof.

Then they began arguing again, this time about the course of action: Whether to use fire, or to use organization. Then a filly with brown straight hair stepped into the center of the argument.

"Why not both?"

They all cheered as they lifted hair into the air, with mexican music now blasting full volume.

After a while...

The mexican music kept on playing as everyone did their part in Winter Wrap Up. The ponies, now organized, piled up the material needed for the nests near those who would construct them. Then, handed to those who were going to place them in the trees. Of course, Mike's Reapers didn't take part in this one because they'd inevitably set everything on fire by sheer accident.

Twilight, Mike with his new, and permanent outfit, and Pinkie Pie stood behind a rock with a map laid on it, with a frozen lake in front of them, where Reapers and Ponies stood on both sides. Twilight pointed at one part of the map, then Pinkie and Mike signalled their respective subordinates to start. The ponies skated over the ice, drawing lines around, while the Reapers followed them with their jetpack-snowboards, breaking the ice with the scorching heat of their propulsors. Needless to say, several crashes were more than expected.

Then, Twilight and Applejack stood on a hill overlooking the ponies and Reapers. Applejack waved the flag, signalling the ponies to begin clearing the snow for the seeds to be planted. However, a group of five Reapers, with Mike in the wheelbarrow-like vehicle, with a seat installed, tinkered with it. They duct-taped their jetpacks to the vehicle and scattered, whit Mike giving a warcry and pointing forward as he activated them. A slight miscalculation in the angle of the propulsors made his vehicle literally dig itself into the earth.

The Reapers didn't take part in the plans to wake up the animals. Again, for obvious reasons.

The Terrans, with their ever-surprising mindset, decided to duct tape further jetpacks to the Vikings, who had so much weight now they couldn't even take off. Mike, who got out of the hole God knows how, entered the cockpit of a Viking with the modifications, closed it, and signalled his men. They began carrying it until they reached a catapult, on which they placed the viking. Then they launched it to the air, with the viking starting its engine and activating the jetpacks. One accidentally got out of its hold and flew right into a supply depot, making it explode as if it was filled with fireworks. Once stabilized, Mike and the other Vikings that were catapulted into the air met up with Rainbow Dash and the pegasi under her command. They flew in formation and circled eachother until they formed a tornado, which sucked in the clouds all around to where they went.

"Valhalla!! Here I cooooome!!" A viking yelled, being shot out of the tornado and striking against a tree.

The frozen lakes melted, with the blocks of ice now being formed thanks to the ponies that skated over the ice.

The reapers with their modified wheelbarrows charged the landscape again digging the trenches for the plants, but this time taking care of not driving straight into the ground. Or it was mere luck and they didn't care at all.

Night arrived, everyone began planting the seeds. And once the night passed and day arrived, Marauders, with their strength, carried literal ice blocks half their size on top of them, with firebats sitting on top of them too. The firebats threw their flames at the blocks, making them melt and water the planted seeds.

Soon enough, everything was completed, and the town shined with beauty, contrasting with what the last day was.

"I can't believe it." Mayor Mare said next to Twilight and Mike. "Spring is here! On time! And we have you to thank for it. If it weren't for your organizing skills and your... Volunteers... we would still be arguing."

"Eeyup." Big Mac added, with everyone laughing afterwards.

"It was a team effort." Twilight stated.

"And since you helped every team, we have an official vest for you. We give you the title, 'All-Team Organizer'."

"Gosh, I don't even know what to say. Thank you everypony."

"What do I get then?" Mike asked.

"You... Well..."

"...?"

"...You did a good job."

Mike sighed in defeat.

"And hereby I declare that winter is... wrapped up on time!" Mayor Mare declared. Everyone cheered.

"Spike's sure gonna be in for a hog-sized surprised when that last piece a' ice melts." Applejack joked, seeing as Spike fell asleep on the only block of ice that remained unmelted in the lake.

'Dear Princess Celestia,

Winter Wrap Up was one of the most special things I've ever been a part of here in Ponyville. It helped me to learn we all have hidden talents, and if we're patient and diligent, we're sure to find them, and as always, with good friendship and teamwork, ponies can accomplish anything, and even more if at least SOMEONE actually takes care of placing those Terrans where they can actually help and not destroy everything...'

Chapter 11: Fall Weather Nitro Pack

"Ah, don't feel bad, Rainbow. It's all in good fun." Applejack cheered Rainbow Dash up, after the blue pony lost the throw-the-horse-shoe game.

"I hate losing..."

"Besides, you're a mighty good athlete. I'm just better, heh heh heh."

"All right, Applejack, you think you're the top athlete in all of Ponyville?"

"Well, I was gonna say in all of Equestria, but that might be gilding the lily."

"...and I think I'm the top athlete. So let's prove it."

"Prove what?"

"I challenge you to an Iron Pony competition. A series of athletic contests to decide who's the best, once and for all."

"You know what, Rainbow? You're on."

"Gold team rules!" Mike, with his now usual outfit of a cloak, reaper gasmask and ghost armor, yelled as he sat on top of a table right before chugging down a barrel of apple cider, hugging it so as not to lose grip of it. Only God knows what kind of witchcraft he had created so as to drink directly through his gasmask without even removing it.

"Why is Mike here?" Questioned Rainbow Dash.

"We made a deal, his guys help with the farm, and ah give 'em free apple cider." Applejack answered.

"So they're only doing something productive if it amuses or benefits them..." She muttered to herself.

Mike lowered the barrel to his lap and let out a small burp. "So when's it going to be?"

Meanwhile...

"Well that was fast." Mike told himself after the fabric of space-time continuum was ripped appart when a cosmic event known as the 'Intro sequence' took place. He was now right next to Twilight and Spike, who were looking at Rainbow Dash and Applejack preparing.

"Hello everypony, and welcome to the first annual Iron Pony competition!" Spike announced.

"Uh, Spike, who are you talking to?" Twilight asked.

"Uhhh... Them!" He said, pointing behind Twilight. Both she and Mike turned around to see Rarity, Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy coming too from the road. "Let the games begin!"

Once everything was prepared and Applejack was ready to start...

"Ready." Twilight began speaking. "Set. Go!"

At her mark, Applejack began running through a series of barrels prepared in front of her.

"Hey man." Someone greeted Mike from behind. Mike turned around and saw a Marauder waving his grenade launcher, which obviously replaced his hand and part of his arm, and an SCV who carried a barrel with one mechanized arm and three metallic tankards with the other. "What's up?"

Mike just shrugged. "Quarrel."

Time passed. Mike, the marauder, and the SCV pilot sitting on top of the SCV drinking while spectating. By this point the round of obstacle course had ended. Now the second event started, the kick-that-thing-that-makes-that-other-thing-go-up-and-hit-the-bell-that-I-don't-even-know-the-name-of event.

Mike turned around upon hearing a strange clanking noise, only to see a pony right next to him on top of the SCV also drinking from the barrel the SCV brought. The quarrel had gathered most's attention.

Rainbow Dash finished her part and allowed Applejack to proceed. She got into position and kicked the blank, only to make the hammer rise and outright break through the bell, now shot into the sky.

"Stray bell!! Take cover!!" Mike yelled at the top of his lungs while jumping off the SCV and running off. The marauder also jumped off, ran to a tree and climbed it. The random pony that was there jumped off, opened the barrel, and threw herself in there before closing it. The SCV pilot got into his machine, started it up, built a bunker in under half a second, and took cover inside it. All of this at the blink of an eye.

Once everything calmed down, the random pony, the marauder, the SCV and Mike kept on watching the show from inside the bunker. Outside, Big Mac, Granny Smith and Applebloom joined the public. The bunkermen just watched with blank faces at the tremendous innuendos that were involved in this event. Only for one to slap his forehead in annoyance once Rainbow Dash said 'Ready for another pony ride?'

Time later, yet more public arrived to see the show. This time being the rodeo event. Then the keep-the-ball-high event. Then the haystack throwing event, with several Terran casualties. Then arm wrasslin wrestling, then ball kicking... Etc. Then Rainbow Dash began winning by using her wings to her favor.

"Woo-hoo! I win by a landslide... or mudslide in your case." Rainbow Dash chuckled. "I am the Iron Pony!"

"Only 'cause you cheated." Applejack retorted.

"What?"

Meanwhile, in the bunker...

Mike tried focusing his hearing, seeing Applejack and Rainbow Dash arguing from the bunker window. "Can anyone hear anything?" He said as he turned to the rest of those inside the bunker.

The SCV pilot stood up, leaving the marauder and the random pony who were playing poker to decide who'd take the last tankard of apple cider, and lit up a cig. He reached for the roof and opened a hatch, revealing a bunch of wires and a small antenna, and a small unplugged wire hanging around. He reached for the wire, pulled it revealing it was of considerable length, walked over to his SCV, and plugged it on the speakers.

"Tomorrow is the annual Runnin' of the Leaves." The voice of Applejack echoed around the anti-flying-bell-bunker. "I challenge you to race me in it."

"A race?" The marauder spoke up. "With them fancy cars and stuff?"

"Heh! Easy shmeasy." Rainbow Dash accepted the challenge.

"Hold on! There is one condition: the point is to run, so no wings allowed." Applejack said.

"Aww..." The marauder was disappointed. "They're going to race around on foot? What be the fun in that?"

"No wings? No problem." Rainbow Dash agreed.

Mike scratched the filter of his gasmask while leaning on the bunker window, thinking. "Yo, maraud', you know something about races?"

"If I know 'bout dem? Son, I could write an encyclopedia 'bout 'em!"

"I think I have a

A day later...

"Welcome to the annual Running of the Leaves!" Pinkie Pie announced with a loudspeaker, being in a hot air balloon in the sky. "This is Pinkie Pie, your official p-eye-in-the-sky announcer. As everypony knows, the running is a very important tradition, for without it, the autumn leaves of Equestria would never fall. So get ready, ponies. The Running of the Leaves will begin in five minutes."

"Pardon me, excuse me." Rainbow Dash walked through the multitude of racers with her head tall and proud. "Make way for the Iron Pony."

"The Iron phony, you mean." Applejack retorted, standing on the starting line with the other ponies.

"So, Applejack, you ready to win second place?"

"I'm ready to run a good, clean race."

"Yeah, yeah..."

"You are not allowed to use your wings."

"I could win this race with both wings tied behind my back."

And then Applejack tied her wings behind her back.

"Racers! Please take your positions!" Pinkie Pie said through the loudspeaker.

Spike had managed to get to the hot air balloon to be Pinkie Pie's co-reporter, Twilight joined the race only to be taunted by Rainbow Dash and Applejack, and everyone got into positions, ready to start.

"All right, ponies, are you ready?" Announced Pinkie Pie.

"Hold up," Spike interrupted. "There seems to be an empty place there, is someone missing?"

"Well... What number was the racer?" Pinkie Pie asked, getting a list with the numbers and the racers.

"02, judging by the fact that the empty space is between ponies 01 and 03."

"02... 02..." Pinkie Pie whispered to herself while checking the list. "A-ha! The missing racer is... Mike? He's racing?" Everyone could hear over the loudspeaker.

"Mike's racing?" Twilight asked herself.

"Oh boy..." Rainbow Dash muttered, already expecting complete destruction of the surrounding area.

"How is he gonna race?" Applejack questioned. "Well, he does have bigger legs than we do, maybe he can actually run faster than a pony."

A viking flew close to the hot air balloon and stopped next to it. The pilot opened the cockpit, jumped into the basket and whispered something to Spike. Then he jumped back into the viking and flew away.

"Well, apparently Mike is a bit late for the race but he said to start without him, saying that he'll catch up somehow." Spike announced.

"Well then. Ponies, are you ready?" Pinkie questioned.

"Get set!" Spike said. At this, everyone prepared themselves. Then, the bell rang, marking the start of the race which countless ponies took part in.

"And they're off!" Pinkie now broadcasted. "Welcome to the official coverage of the Running of the Leaves! You know, Spike, despite its name, the leaves don't do any of the actual running. No, that's left to my little ponies."

"What a title drop." Mike said to himself inside a machine.

"Say what, son?" The marauder from before asked.

"Nothing." Mike answered. He grabbed the radio hanging from the ceiling of the machine and closed it to his mouth. "How's the team going?" He asked.

"We're getting everything up'n'running."

Outside, near the start of the racing track, several SCVs, marines, and a medivac placed themselves. Carrying equipment like radios, tools, and anything you'd see in a standard Terran race. Then, the marauder arrived and sat on a chair that was placed behind a table, which had several mini-TVs stacked, each showing a different thing, like Mike inside the machine, part of the tracks, crew members... Anything important. The marauder then grabbed the microphone. "We're ready, man. Whenever ya're ready."

"Understood." Mike said, placing the small radio on the ceiling again. He grabbed his keys, placed them behind the wheel in front of him, spinned them, and started up the engine of the machine. It was a heavily modified hellion that looked not unlike a Terran racing car, which slowly made its way to the starting line, with every pony that was present staring. On the door of the hellion, the number '02' was painted, and replacing the 0 was the insignia of the Terran Dominion. "Check-up." He said while typing a few words on a keyboard that was to his right, with a screen above it. "Fuel tanks full. Suspension optimal. Engine OK. Oil good." He then lowered the radio from the ceiling agian. "How's the road?"

"Thing's as good as it's gonna get." The marauder replied. "You're gonna meet a hell lot of uneven terrain since thing's not made for vehicles, but ain't gonna present trouble. The entire track's as a rural one would be, so no grass to block the road or anything for that matter. Just follow what's viewable."

"Got it. Good to go?"

"Have at 'em, champ."

Mike placed the radio away, used the gear stick to change the gear of his ride, and hit the gas, making his vehicle drive full speed forward. Clouds of dust followed him.

Once the race gathered heat...

"Command, I am on the move, I'm spotting several ponies in front of me." Mike yelled through the radio, shaking around due to the uneven terrain but still mantaining his grip of the wheel. "What's the situation?!"

"You're in for a helluva race, son. Thing's covering a lot of distance." He heard the marauder speaking through the radio. Above him, a Raven was making its reconnaissance flight. "The racer on the last place is at a pretty damn distance compared to the ones on the first place, you'll have to catch up ASAP."

"Ones in the first place?" Mike questioned his use of the plural.

"Yeah, two are fighting for the first place, one blue pegasus and an orange pony with a brown hat."

"Copy that." Mike acknowledged. He gripped the wheel with more strength and increased speed, now planning to surpass the ponies in front of him.

"Woah!" Spike gasped, seeing the Raven making its flight right next to him. "What was that?"

"Mike's, I bet." Pinkie Pie reassured him before broadcasting once again. "Let's check in with our two competitive ponies, Applejack and Rainbow Dash. Having come fast out of the gate, Applejack and Rainbow Dash are evenly matched running neck in neck. But what's this? Applejack is making a move, she's now ahead by a nose. But Rainbow Dash pulls at Applejack's have-it and takes the lead. She's ahead by half a nose. Or maybe three quarters of a nose. No, about sixty-three point seven percent of a nose... Roughly speaking. Applejack sees this move and pushes forth with her strong workhorse legs slinking ahead by three hundred and fifty nos-- What's this? Looking at the other side of the race there's a strange cloud of dust making its move in the race, surpassing the ponies in the rear! The cloud joined the race! On closer inspection, there's something leading the cloud, a strange machine, and by strange machine I mean Mike in his strange machine! Mike has finally joined the race!!"

"Mike?!" Spike gasped, surprised by him catching up so soon. "Mike's surpassing everyone in merely seconds! If this keeps up maybe he'll be able to reach Applejack and Rainbow Dash! Only time will tell, we're already halfway in the race and there's no telling if he'll be fast enough to reach the end before them!"

"You didn't think I was gonna let you off that easily, did you?" Rainbow Dash taunted Applejack, right before she tripped on a rock, leaving Rainbow Dash with the current first place.

"I don't believe it." Applejack ranted, on the ground, seeing Rainbow Dash run off to the horizon.

"I know, it's beautiful, isn't it?" Twilight mentioned once catching up, seeing the leaves fall.

"Not the scenery, Twilight. Rainbow Dash just tripped me."

"She did not."

"She did too!"

"She did not, and if you slowed down and looked where you're going, like me, you'd see that you tripped over a rock."

"What? Oh, hayseed! Now I got a lot of ground to make up to catch Rainbow."

"Just be careful!"

Right before they could even start moving, they could hear the rumbling of the earth behind them. They turned around, and before they could even react, a giant cloud of dust engulfed them. They could hear something too, as if something drifted from behind them to right in front of them, as if it was stopping. Once the dust cleared, they saw Mike opening the hatch of his Hellion and staring at them.

"Mike?!" Twilight asked irritated, with Applejack asking the same but out of surprise.

Mike turned his head around to see the group of ponies running off. Then, he turned back at Twilight and Applejack. He waved his arm, closed the hatch, and drove off to reach the rest of the group.

"Command, I have surpassed Applejack, what's the current situation?" Mike asked through the radio.

"You tell me, son! Look next to you!"

Mike looked to the side, only to see through the glass of his cockpit how Applejack ran straight past him. The hellion, unfortunately, wasn't known for its speed, seeing as even a zergling with a metabolic boost could match it.

"What?!" Mike asked himself in disbelief, seeing the orange pony run off. "This calls for decisive action..." He whispered to himself. He moved his right hand behind the gear stick, opened a hatch, and turned three switches, each lighting up a light which turned from red to green. He lowered the radio from the ceiling and spoke once again. "Command, any considerable curves in the road?"

"Ain't none. If you're gonna do what I think you're gonna do, go ahead."

"Gladly..."

He placed the radio back and then placed his hand on a lever in the hatch. Then, with all his strength, he pulled it. He could see how the scenery blurred more and more as his speed increased. The level activated the nitro pack of the reaper jetpacks that were duct taped and superglued to the back of his hellion. The shaking became fierce, almost making the hellion hover due to the uneven terrain.

Right in front of him he could see two blurred dots, a purple one, and a blue one. He knew it was Twilight and Rainbow Dash, but having no time to waste he just drove past them without even a greeting. Needless to say they were now covered by the leaves face to hoof.

"Command, I have surprassed Rainbow Dash. I am-- WOAH!!" He yelled, outmaneuvering a horde of racing ponies while almost losing control of his vehicle. "DAMMIT, DAMMIT, DAMMIT!!" He kept on yelling. "I am in the middle of the racing ponies, I'm surpassing most to the best of my abilities, what should I expect?!"

"Boulder!!"

"Boulwhat?!" He barely managed to spit before a boulder was right in front of him. He managed to barely dodged it, only for it to impact on a wheel and send him flying, thankfully forwards instead of any other direction. He yelled having no control over his vehicle in mid-flight, and even Applejack, who was below him as it flew, could hear it as it surpassed her. After a moment, he was on the ground. "Command, I lost a wheel, send a team ASAP--" He requested, but now felt how several SCVs crash-landed on his upside-down vehicle. The medivac was dropping them right on top of him. "Ok that was a bit too fast."

The SCVs, with several buckets of minerals which were needed to repair the hellion, God knows how, managed to repair it by simply drilling any part of it. After a while, the reparations were complete, the hellion was turned over to its proper position, and the SCVs left with the medivac. "Hell of a ride, right there." Mike mentioned before driving off again. Apparently the nitro pack never runs out of nitro either.

From his mirror he could see how the hordes of ponies, Applejack and Rainbow Dash were closing in. Determined, and knowing that sooner or later they'd reach him, he decided to take a shortcut only he'd see the sense in. Reaching the crossroad, he took the left road up a small elevation. Shaking inside his vehicle, he drove higher and higher while the ponies took the other direct route.

"Uhhh, what are you gonna do now?" The marauder asked.

"Shortcut."

"You're gonna get yourself killed man!!"

"Don't worry, there's no collision damage implemented."

"Oh, right. Godspeed, chum!"

The hellion kept on driving until it reached the top level, now driving towards a cliff which overlooked the end of the track. Mike knew exactly what awaited him, and so, drove right off the cliff, now falling towards the goal.

"VALHALLA!! HERE I COME!!"

"Ugh!" Applejack grunted as Rainbow Dash tried driving her off. "Cut it out!"

"No, you cut it out!"

They were extremely close to the goal.

"You started it!"

"And now I'm gonna finish it!"

"Oh no, you won't!" Applejack said, biting Rainbow Dash's tail, thus slowing her down.

"Oh yes I will!" She said, doing the same.

Applejack the bit her ropes, freeing her and allowing her to use her wings.

"That's it! All bets are off!" She said as she flew forward.

"Oh no, you don't." Applejack grunted, jumping right at her, tackling her and ending up rolling while fighting while everyone stared. Only the flaming wrecks of Mike's ride which was close to the goal caused them to finish, as they impacted it. They were sent flying as they tripped on it, landing on the other side of the finish line.

"I won!" Rainbow Dash yelled.

"No, I won!"

"I won!"

"You tied!" Spike interrupted the argument.

"Tied?" They both questioned.

"For first?" Applejack asked.

"For almost-last!" Pinkie said.

"Almost-last?!" Applejack gasped.

"Then, who won?!" Rainbow Dash asked.

Then, Twilight walked in with a medal.

"You?!" The blue and orange pony asked.

"Gah..." Mike grunted inside the flaming wreck, with a red light blinking on and off perpetually. "Must... Get out..." He told himself, half unconscious. He looked around, and right above him he could see a blinding light that contrasted with the rest of the wreckage. He lifted his arm at it, then the other, and with grueling effort he pulled himself up. The great amount of light blinding his eyes. Now he blindly moved, trying to get out of the wreck completely. He pushed himself further until he fell out of the wreck into the ground. "Here... Is my..." He mustered the remaining strength he had to crawl forwards, until with his last effort, he laid his hand on the finish line. "Glory..."

Before he completely passed out, he could see the shadow of a tall mare, far taller than most, walking up to him. "Not one..." He muttered, thinking it was some sort of supernatural agent like the angel of death. "Step back..."

"Well, with all your horsing around, it was quite easy." Twilight explained.

"You're right, Twilight. Our behavior was just terrible." Applejack admited.

"We weren't very good sports." Rainbow Dash added.

"Sounds to me that an important lesson was learned." Celestia spoke all of a sudden, arriving with Mike, who was half-dead, lying unconscious on her back.

"Princess Celestia?!" Applejack and Rainbow Dash gasped.

"What are you doing here?" Applejack questioned.

"Fall is one of my favorite seasons, so I came to celebrate the Running of the Leaves."

"I'm sorry you had to see us being such poor sport, Princess."

"That's all right, Applejack. Anypony can get swept up in the excitement of competition. Like someone here has shown..." She was referring to Mike.

"Why are you carrying him?" Asked Twilight, surprised to see royalty not leaving the more prepared guards to do their bidding.

"Oh, I have something planned for him. Don't worry about it."

Twilight just stared with a blank face. Then, she shrugged it off. "It's important to remember that the friendship is always more important than the competition."

"Exactly, Twilight. Now, unfortunately, because the two of you were busy tricking each other instead of shaking down leaves, many of the lovely trees of Equestria are still covered. Surprising, considering this 'Terran' almost caused a duststorm all on his own."

"Why, Princess, I bet we can knock those leaves down for you lickety-split." Applejack boasted. Then, she turned to Rainbow Dash. "Whaddya say, friend? Wanna go for another run?"

"I'd love to stretch my legs."

Then they began running off through the forests.

"Command..." A ghost cloaked in the distance with a sniper rifle spoke through the radio. "I have the mare who kidnapped the Commander in my crosshair... Awaiting clearance to engage..."

"You retard!" The marauder from before yelled. "That's Celestia! She's the Commander's ally!"

"...Oh."

Chapter 12: Sonic Wraithboom

"So..." Mike asked Celestia. They were both sitting on tremendously fancy chairs, in front of a tremendously fancy table inside the tremendously fancy castle. The tremendously fancy scenery, the tremendously fancy chandelier, and the tremendously fancy caprpet contrasted with his not-so-tremendously-fancy style of life. That is, living in a metallic hulk that didn't even have air conditioning. It was morning, Mike had woken up an hour ago due to his unfortunate crash with the hellion in the race a day ago, in which Celestia decided to bring him to the castle. "Why was I brought here?" He asked, staring at a tremendously fancy teacup resting over a tremendously fancy little plate. "Fancy life you got here... Huh..."

"I wished to speak with you about something that'd most likely involve you in the near future."

"Huh?" He raised his sight from the teacup to her eyes, seeing as this would be more important than he anticipated. "And that's...?"

"There is an entity, of which I'll not discuss about so as not to risk anything. That entity may escape and wreck chaos all over Equestria, and you might influence its escape with your behaviour."

"Wait, I'm to blame if things go chaotic?!"

"No. Don't worry about it. You hold abilities to create armies out of nowhere, and with your arrival those... Strange crystals and geysers appeared for your benefit. Once you arrived, part of our reality was altered to fit your kind. But there's something else out there that has the power to alter reality at its will, and its name is 'Discord'... I don't know if your arrival means that this entity is close to escaping, but I have to warn you, if this entity were to escape... We'll need everything we can get and more to stop it."

"So... To sum up... I arrived and you're worried about something escaping? And that that something escaping is powerful enough that I won't be able to stop it?"

"Precisely."

"Alright, so, what do I have to do then?"

"Just be careful. I don't know what to expect."

"Alright, fantastic."

My little intro~ My little intro~

"Come on..." Rainbow Dash pushed her wings' strength trying to perform a Sonic Rainboom, with Fluttershy watching from below. She was already close enough to breaking the sound barrier, but a lack of strength threw her back as if the air became rubber.

"Hey guys, what's going o--" Mike greeted, closing in with a Viking, only to be interrupted by Rainbow Dash impacting against his ride and sending them both flying.

Meanwhile...

Twilight sighed as she placed the last book on the bookcase, with Rarity, Pinkie Pie and Applejack with her. "Last one. Thank you so much for helping me clean up all these books guys. It was a crazy week of studying."

In the distance, Rainbow Dash's screams were heard getting closer and closer, until she crash-landed right through the window, making a mess of everything.

"Mayday--" Mike's desperate yelling was heard right after Rainbow's landing, with a viking crash-landing right through the roof and destroying the floor. Dust engulfed the house. "I've had worse." He shrugged the damage off by getting out of the wreckage and cleaning the dust off his cloak.

"Rainbow Dash, you rock! Woohoo." Fluttershy cheered through the barely intact window. Then, once she realized what happened, gasped. "Did my cheering do that?"

"Hehe." Rainbow Dash gave a slight laugh. "Sorry about that ladies. THAT was a truly feeble performance."

"Actually, it wasn't all bad. I particularly liked it when you made the clouds spin."

"What are you two arguing about?" Twilight questioned.

"Were we arguing? I'm sorry." Fluttershy apologized.

Rainbow Dash sighed. "I wish you guys could come to Cloudsdale to see me compete in the Best Young Flyer Competition."

"The what now?" Mike asked, seeing as he didn't leave yet.

"What's that?" Twilight asked. Mike was ignored at first.

"It's where all the greatest Pegasus flyers get together and show off their different flying styles! Some are fast! And some are graceful." She tried doing graceful gestures, only to lose balance by the books lying around and the debris. "Woah, woah, WooooaaAAAAHH!"

"Golly. I'd love to see you strut yer stuff in that competition." Applejack said.

"Yeah. I wish you guys could be there. Fluttershy's a great support, but her cheering isn't exactly inspirational."

"OOH! I'd love to see you make a sonic rainboom! It's like, the most coolest thing ever! Even though I've never actually seen it, but I mean COME ON! It's a sonic rainboom! How not cool could it possibly not be?!" Pinkie Pie hyperactively stated.

"The what now?" Mike asked again.

"What's a sonic rainboom?" Twilight asked.

"Will you guys stop ignoring me!?"

"You really need to get out more." Pinkie Pie began answering. "The sonic rainboom is legendary! When a Pegasus like Rainbow Dash gets going sooo fast... BOOM! A sonic boom and a rainbow can happen all at once!"

"Yeah, okay, good luck with that, I'm out." Mike sighed, losing interest before even gaining it and leaving for his base.

After a few hours...

Mike sighed deeply, resting on top of his command center not even being able to take a nap due to already sleeping for most of his time. "Booooriiiing..." He ranted. If any pony had heard him, they'd have evacuated the continent already. Everyone knows what happens when Mike gets bored. "I wonder what those talking ponies are doing..." He asked himself, figuring they were a rather amusing source of entertainment.

He jumped off his command center and decided to walk over to Twilight's house. "Hey guys, what were you saying before about that sonic rai--" He asked as he slowly opened the door, only to figure out that there was no one inside. He sighed before closing the door and heading to the center of the town.

"Knock knock." He said as he opened the door of the Sugar Cube Corner, then bell ringing. "Is Pinkie here?" He asked Mr. Cake.

"Nope, she's with her friends."

"Tsk." He closed the door and walked around again, he had to figure out where they were. Now he decided to head to Rarity's house.

"Hey..." He caught Sweetie Belle's attention by pressing himself against the window of the second floor from outside and greeting her, almost giving the poor mini-marshmallow a heart attack, petrifying her. "Rarity's here...?"

Sweetie Belle could do nothing but shake her head, staring at Mike whose breathe fogged the window. Once he received the message, he just slowly slided off the window, making that characteristic noise of skin sliding on a window as he descended.

"Okay, so... Twilight, Rarity, Pinkie Pie..." He counted.

Big Mac was carrying an empty wooden basket as he walked through the forest of the Sweet Apple Acres. Once he saw a tree with several apples that were ready for picking, he placed the basket next to it, and prepared to kick it with his hind legs.

"Hey, have you see--" Mike tried asking, being on top of the tree, only to fall off into the basket once Big Mac kicked the tree. "GAAAH--Ow."

"What in tarnation..."

"I repeat the question." Mike sighed as he threw an apple away. "Have you seen Applejack?"

"Nope."

"She's not here then?"

"Eeyup."

"She is?"

"Nope."

"She isn't?"

"Eeyup."

"Wait, you're saying 'Eeyup' to her not being here as in confirming it or saying that she actually is here?"

"...What?"

"Is Applejack here?"

"Nope."

"Got it." He said while getting out of the basket.

"So you're 'Angel', huh..." Mike asked Fluttershy's bunny. The ridiculous size between the two forced Mike to actually crouch as much as he could to actually be able to talk to it.

Angel nodded. It was actually quite amusing that a simply bunny was the only thing not shocked, petrified, scared, or unnerved by the Terran at first sight.

"Is Fluttershy here?"

Angel shook his head.

"Shame. Later, then."

"Where is everyone...?" He asked himself inside his command center, sitting on a chair and leaning back while drinking a soda.

"Hey, Mike." An SCV pilot asked while walking up to him.

"Hmm?"

"Apparently a few ponies saw them going to Cloudswhateveritsnameis. Looks like Rainbow Dash also lives there."

"Say what?"

"That big city in the sky, made out of clouds."

"Yeah?"

"They're there."

"What?"

"They're there!!"

"No, I mean, clouds?! How can they even step on clouds, let alone build a damn city in there?!"

The SCV pilot just stared in annoyance, he knew too well that what Mike was capable of doing was far more mind-crushing that simply clouds being somewhat solid.

"Alright, alright!" Mike said in annoyance while throwing his arms in the air. "I'll just go get a Viking."

Time later...

"Fillies and gentlecolts!" An announcer... Announced. "Please rise and join me in welcoming our beloved Princess Celestia!"

Princess Celestia then arrived with two guards by her side, landing on a tremendously fancy seat reserved for her.

"Hey guys." The voice of Mike greeted Pinkie Pie, Applejack, Twilight and Fluttershy, who just turned around in surprise and saw Mike with a viking hovering next to them. Then he began transforming his viking to land on the cloud they were sitting on. "What did I mi-- AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH" He screamed as he fell right through the cloud.

"What's Mike doing here?" Fluttershy asked.

"Not even here we can get away from him..." Twilight sighed...

"So... Did I miss something?" Mike asked once again, rising through the part of the cloud he fell through with his viking.

"Twilight..." Applejack pressured her.

"Fine... Mike, open up that thing."

"Why?"

"You'll know."

Mike opened the cockpit of the viking and stepped on the wing. Then, Twilight focused and casted a spell on him.

"Done." Twilight said. "Just step on the cloud, you wont fall now."

"Sweet." He said as he jumped out the viking and landed on the cloud. Five seconds later the spell wore off and he fell again.

"Right... I forgot he's not a pony..." Twillight sighed.

"Please welcome our celebrity judges for the Best Young Flyer Competition. The Wonderbolts!" The announcer... Announced, right before the wonderbolts arrived with their trail of smoke. Right after them, another six flyers leaving a trail of fire and smoke arrived, each one of them taking their own path to enter the stadium. The six of them sat right next to Twilight and her friends, and once they stopped moving, it was revealed that they were machines. One struck the empty viking and sent it flying away. Hell knows how they could actually fit in the seats.

"Who missed me?" Mike greeted from the cockpit of a wraith.

"Another one of your machines?" Twilight asked.

"The fastest flyer in my arsenal, this bad boy. Hey, check this out."

Mike tinkered with the contorls and after a while the wraith became invisible.

"He-- He disappeared?!" Applejacked asked.

"And now, let's find out who will take the prize as this year's best young flyer!" The announcer announced.

"Yo what's up?" Mike greeted the announcer right behind him with his wraith decloaking, scaring the poor sod enough to almost throw him off balance. Mike laughed on his way back to his friends.

"Okay, so those things can turn invisible?" Twilight questioned.

"You bet. Waaaaaait a second, there's a competition going on?"

"Oh no..." Twilight whispered to herself, knowing that things were about to get worse and worse.

"Meh, I'll just watch."

Everyone was surprised to see Mike just lay back on his wraith's seat and start drinking a can of KopruColaTM. Then they saw Rarity fly out in a tremendously fancy outfit followed by Rainbow Dash.

Mike spat all his drink in shock. "By the Emperor, how horrifying."

Everyone cheered at what would be the last competitors of this competition. Rarity now began 'dancing' in the air while Rainbow Dash went through an obstacle course made of pillar of clouds. Unfortunately, Rainbow Dash had struck the last pillar, sending her flying and crash near the seat of her bullies, who laughed and taunted her.

Mike sighed and rolled his eyes, then opened the cockpit of his wraith. He stepped outside, walked to the edge of his wraith's wing, took out a blinding grenade from his pocket, tied it with a rope and lowered it at them not unlike with a fishing rod. The blinding grenade had 'Pull me' written on a paper tied to the pin. The bullies grabbed it, not knowing that Mike was a friend of hers, and pulled the pin. It's pretty obvious what happened next, with Mike laughing and returning to his wraith.

After that, Rainbow Dash began spinning the clouds up above. Unfortunately another mistake caused the cloud to accidentally be sent flying towards Celestia, who barely dodged it by lowering herself.

"You need to aim lower!!" Mike yelled. Now everyone looked at him with confusion. "Wait, that wasn't intentional?"

Now Rarity began rising to the skies above, with Rainbow Dash following. But once Rarity reached her desired height and made a light show with her wings and the sun, the heat burnt her wings off, causing her to fall to her demise.

"Oh no! Her wings evaporated into thin air!" Twilight stated.

"ITS GO TIME!!" Mike yelled, throwing away his can of soda which accidentally struck one of Celestia's guards unconscious. Mike's wraith took off into the skies, with his other five wraiths behind him taking off too. Unfortunately one wraith impacted with another in the middle of taking off, tearing off their wings and making them fall in a flaming wreckage. Other 20 wraiths cloaked all over the stadium revealed themselves and took off with Mike. Even the wonderbolts joined the chase for Rarity as she fell.

"Command, how are we going to stop her fall?" A wraith asked, seeing as they had no means to actually catch her.

"I have no idea, keep flying!!" Mike yelled.

"WR-4 reporting, the wonderbolts are reaching their target, should we disengage?"

"That's a negative, WR-4."

"This is WD-40, the wonderbolts were struck unconscious by Rarity, they're-- Damn, I almost hit one!!"

Then, several explosions were heard, with flaming wrecks now falling from the skies with them.

"WT-12 here, we've lost six wraiths already, we cannot evade at this speed!!"

"Keep moving!! Keep chasing!!" Mike screamed.

"Unknown object spotted behind us, speed supassing our's, should we intercept?"

"Negative."

Rainbow Dash was the unknown object behind them, now reaching a tremendous speed which almost breaks the sound barrier. Faster and faster she flew towards Rarity, even reaching the wraiths and evading them. And, not a moment later, the sound barrier was broken by her effort, creating a shockwave of several colours, not unlike a rainbow. A sonic rainboom.

"A sonic rainboom! She did it! She did it! WOOO!" Fluttershy outright yelled.

"Command, permission to speak freely?"

"Permission granted."

"FU--" The wraith could only say before embedding itself into the ground, with every other wraith following suit, except for Mike's due to forgetting to turn around before impacting the ground. Mike's just stopped a few millimetres from the ground, giving a warm and welcomed flip of the finger to basic physics. Rainbow Dash, however, managed to rescue the wonderbolts and Rarity right before impacting on the ground, with a trail of a rainbow following behind her.

"You guys are idiots." Mike sighed before turning around and flying to Cloudsdale again.

"A sonic rainboom! Wooo! YEAH!" Fluttershy cheered, with everyone in the stadium following suit.

"I did it. I did it!" Rainbow Dash could barely believe herself.

Rarity sighed in relief. "You sure did. Oh thank you Rainbow Dash. You saved my life!"

"Oh yeah. I did that too. Ha, best day EVER!"

"Another pointless day where I accomplished nothing." Mike uncaringly said, uncloaking his wraith right next to the ponies, surprising them a bit. He had his legs crossed over the controls and drinking another can of KopruColaTM. It could be said half the wraith was actually a container for those things.

Rainbow Dash met the wonderbolts and won the prize, declared by Celestia herself, Rarity apologized, and Mike successfully cloaked before the guard who he accidentally knocked unconscious saw him.

"So Twilight Sparkle, did you learn anything about friendship from this experience?" Celestia asked.

"I did Princess, but I think Rarity learned even more than me."

"I certainly did. I learned how important it is to keep your hooves on the ground, and be there for your friends."

"Excellent. Well done Rarity. Mike, I can see you."

"WHAT..." He exclaimed, uncloaking again. 'Note to self...' He thought to himself. 'Celestia might be a detector...'

"This really is the best day EVER!" Rainbow Dash exclaimed.

"Uhh, hey Rainbow Crash." One of the three pegasi who taunted her caught her attention.

"Dash!" The other corrected.

"Oh! Uhh... Sorry Rainbow Dash. Uhh, we just wanted to congratulate--"

"Battlecruiser operational."

"Uhhh... What was that?" The third pegasi asked, right before looking up and seeing a battlecruiser darkening the skies.

"It means 'Run'." Mike added, right before a charge was shot in front of the three pegasi, scaring them away. "No one can make fun of these ponies, understood?!" He yelled.

"Aww..." Twilight was touched by his generosity.

"Only I can!!"

Then Twilight sighed again.

"Mike." Celestia called for him.

"Hmm?"

"I assume you remember what I told you this morning."

Mike gave a thumbs up from inside the wraith.

Chapter 13: Over a siege tank

It was the early hours of the morning inside a train that headed straight to Appaloosa, the sun in the horizon giving it's first rays of light at dawn, and the train shaking over the rails, pulled by a few ponies. A train. Pulled by ponies. Several tons of metal and everything else that was inside pulled by ponies. There wasn't even an engine, just ponies.

Just. Ponies.

"Why did I even decide to go with you guys to begin with...?" Mike asked himself, waking up and standing up. His outfit was his second skin apparently, since he even sleeps with his gasmask, armor and hooded cloak. He saw how everyone was still asleep, and figuring it'd still be a long way till their destination, he walked around trying to find some sort of fridge or something where he could get a snack. A tremendous shake interrupted him and woke up the others, who now reached for a window to look outside. Mike then joined them in trying to figure out the source of the shake.

"A buffalo stampede!" Exclaimed Twilight. Everyone was dumbstrick staring at the stampede, chances were they had never seen one before.

"I just love their accessories." Rarity stated, seeing as the buffalos all had a set of feathers on their heads.

"They're getting awfully close to the train." Twilight stated upon seeing them getting closer and closer. Then, they began striking against it with enough strength to send those inside flying all over the place. "Where's Mike?!" She yelled.

"Come! Show me what passed for fury amongst your misbegotten kind!" Mike yelled on the roof of the train, with a revolver in hand.

"Oooh, looky! Now they're doing TRICKS!" Pinkie Pie stated upon seeing the buffalos jumping on top of each other. "Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Now do a back-flip!... Or... Just jump?" She said, seeing another small buffalo jumping on top of the roof. Then the steps could be heard running over the train roof.

"Hmm.. Something tells me this isn't a circus act." Rainbow Dash mentioned.

"Who are you supposed to be?" Mike questioned the small buffalo with confusion, only for it to run right past him. "You're not going anywhere!" He yelled before turning around and jumping at the buffalo, successfully tackling it. However, the small size allowed it to struggle and escape his grip. "Get back here you little sh..."

Still on the roof, he saw how now Rainbow Dash intercepted the buffalo, only for it to run past her. He stood up and began running at the buffalo, jumping over the union of the carts. She tried intercepting once again only for the buffalo to jump directly above past her. Mike took the opportunity to aim his revolver while the buffalo was in mid-air, only for his shot to miss. He didn't stop running, even after Rainbow Dash crashed against one of those train sights while she was chasing the buffalo. However, he was too late, for the buffalo now disconnected a part of the train and was drifting away. Once he realized he could just shoot her, the buffalo was too far away for him to aim properly.

Mike just sighed in irritation as he watched the stampede also moving away, with the remaining ponies seeing how the cart with Spike and Bloomberg drifted further and further beyond their reach without anything they could do to stop it.

Later, at Appaloosa...

"Okay, so this now turned into some sort of rescue mission?" Mike questioned, jumping off the train with the rest of the mane 6, or what were left of them, ran out the train. "Oh my God..." He said, standing petrified looking at his gasmask's HUD. He could see from a bird's-eye-view that this place didn't have mineral deposits, but rich, yellow mineral deposits. "This is like Christmas!" He exclaimed, running off while a medivac arrived, dropped several SCVs, and began building a command center, two refineries, a barracks and a supply depot in the outskirts of Appaloosa, where the minerals and geysers were located.

"Hey there!" Braeburn greeted Applejack and her friends. "Welcome ta Aaaapplelooosa!"

"Braeburn, listen–"

"Cousin Applejack, mind yer manners, you have yet ta introduce me to your compadres! Shame on you!"

"Braeburn, listen, somethin' terrible has happened–"

"Terrible is right, your train is full 7 minutes late! That's 7 minutes less for you to delight in the pleasures and wonders of... Aaapplelooosa! Boggles the mind, we settler ponies built all this in just the past year, don't it?! And as you can see, we have all of the finest comforts. Like horse-drawn carriages!"

"Everything ready?" Mike asked his Appaloosa expansion.

"Up and ready, boss." An SCV affirmed.

"Alright..." Mike began checking the map of his HUD, trying to figure out where Spike, Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie were located. He moved the map all around, but found nothing. The fog of war covered everything but Appaloose and his base in the outskirts. He had to scout first. "Send a marine to each part of the map to scout."

"Only one per part?" The SCV questioned.

"Yeah, if one gets killed then we found something."

"...Alright."

At his command, eight marines, each running to a different distance, began their reconnaissance run. The fog of war was lifted wherever they go, but nothing found yet. There was still much fog of war remaining, and the only thing needed now was time to scout the general area.

Later, the next day...

"DAMN THIS MAP IS HUGE AS F--" Mike complained.

"Boss."

"Yeah?"

"Look at sector 5."

"Uhhh..." Mike now moved the map on his gasmask's HUD to sector 5. Namely, Applejack, Rarity, Twilight and Fluttershy were preparing to go find Rainbow Dash, Spike, Pinkie Pie and Bloomberg. "I see. I'll send them a message, then.

"Ow! Gently, please!" Rarity begged Applejack.

"Sorry, Rarity, but our friends are out there and we have ta' be ready for a long hike into buffalo territory if we're gonna save 'em!"

Mike: Guys.

"...What in Tarnation..." Applejack said upon seeing text floating.

Mike: You guys going to look for the rest of the gang?

"Uhhh... Yes?" She answered, not even knowing if actually answering would work.

Mike: Alright, be advised, I can't go with you guys. I'll stay here and watch out for anything that happens.

"...Alright..." This was just too strange for Applejack and the rest. "Let's go!"

Once they ran a short distance, they met with Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash, and Spike.

"Hi guys!" Pinkie Pie greeted. "Hi Mike."

Mike: Yo.

"Pinkie!" Fluttershy tackled her in joy. "We're so glad you're safe."

Then, the rest greeted them with relief for their safety.

"How did you escape from the buffalo?" Twilight questioned.

"We didn't!" Pinkie answered, right before the small buffalo revealed herself from behind a boulder. Everyone gasped.

Mike: YOU

Mike: THAT THING ON THE TRAIN ROOF

Mike: IT WAS YOU

Mike: I SWEAR

Mike: TO ARCTURUS

Mike: I WILL DESTROY YOU

"Are those... Floating words...?" The buffalo asked in confusion.

Mike: FITE ME

"Don't ask." Twilight reassured her.

Mike: DONT IGNORE ME DAMMIT

"We promised the buffalo a chance to talk." Rainbow Dash stated.

"Oh, yeah? 'Bout what?" Applejack retorted.

"We brought our new pal, Little Strongheart--"

Mike: I NOW KNOW YOUR NAME

Mike: I ONLY NEED TO FIND OUT WHERE YOU LIVE NOW

"--here, to explain to the Appleloosians why they should move the apple trees off buffalo land."

"That information would be quite help–" Braeburn mentioned, before being interrupted by Applejack.

"That's weird. 'Cause my cousin, Braeburn, here, wants to explain to the buffalo why they should let the apple trees stay."

"That would be a useful thing to –" Little Strongheart tried speaking, only to be interrupted by Rainbow Dash.

"The land is theirs! You planted the trees not knowing that. Honest mistake. Now, you just gotta move 'em, that's all."

Mike: THE MINERALS AND GEYSERS ARE MINE YOU GOT THAT?!

"Well... eheh..." Braeburn gave a nervous chuckle.

"They busted their rumps here!" Applejack now argued. "An' now they're suppos't ta bust their rumps again, just 'cause some buffalo won't stampede someplace else?"

"Plant the trees somewhere else!" Rainbow Dash suggested.

"Where?! It's the only flatland around these parts!"

"The BUFFALO had it FIRST!"

"The settler ponies need it to LIVE!"

"Come ON Applejack!"

"You're bein' unreasonable!" Applejack stated.

"I put my hoof down!" Rainbow Dash said over Applejack's voice at the same time.

Mike: I DONT KNOW WHAT WE'RE YELLING ABOUT

Mike: ...

Mike: LOUD NOISES

Mike: CAPS LOCK IS CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL

"Look..." Twilight began speaking. "Both the settlers and the buffalo have good reasons to use this land. There must be something we can do."

"Hey! I've got an idea!" Pinkie Pie suggested.

Mike: Oh boy here we go.

After a while, and after Pinkie Pie's song with the public spectating...

"All right, Pinkie Pie! That was FANTASTIC! What a great song! You're right on!" Spike cheered.

The sheriff, Mike and the chief of the buffalos nodded at eachother.

"It appears that Sheriff Silverstar, Mike and I have come to... An agreement." The chief of the buffalos stated.

"We have." The sheriff added.

Mike: Sort of.

Mike was just there resting on top of an SCV with a keyboard and a bottle of apple cider. Too lazy to even speak.

Everyone became excited at the rather quick agreement, and awaited for their word.

"That was the worst performance we've ever seen..." The chief stated.

"Teh... Abso-tively!" The sheriff added.

Mike: 3/10

"The time for action... Hmh... Is upon us!" The chief announced. "Our stampede will start at high noon tomorrow. And if the orchard is still there, we'll flatten IT! AND the whole town!" Everyone gasped.

"But, Chief!" Little Strongheart tried avoiding the massacre.

"An' we Appleloosians say you'd better bring yer best, 'cause we'll be ready and waitin'." The sheriff challenged him.

"But, Sheriff..." Braeburn tried doing the same as Little Strongheart.

"We Terrans will do what we are best at, hold our ground against your horde..." Mike added to the challenge.

"Oh boy... Mike joined it..." Twilight became worried.

Mike: Yo, Mike, you dropped your keyboard.

Mike turned around, to see an SCV with a keyboard waving at him.

"Oh... That wasn't the message of my song at all..." Pinkie Pie said, worried.

Later that day...

The ponies of Appaloosa were fortifying their town, building barricades and closing their doors and windows. Bucking the apple trees and turning the apples into pies, which would be used as their ammunition. Twilight, Rarity, Fluttershy and Applejack could do nothing to prevent it, as everyone ignored them and prepared further for the imminent attack.

"What are we going to do?" Fluttershy asked. The group was walking around town.

"I don't know, no one wants to listen to us." Twilight answered with worry.

"Hold up, ain't that Mike over there?" Applejack questioned while pointing near a building. Mike and the Sheriff were discussing.

"I have more than enough resources to aid your cause, sheriff." Mike said.

"What are you suggesting?" The sheriff replied.

"Me and my men can prepare the defenses all over the place and fill any weakpoint that this town may present. At this situation, It'd be wise to say you hold more authority than anyone here over this place. Do I have your permission to let my forces in?"

"We need all the help we can get, call your boys in."

"Gladly."

Minutes later, dozens and dozens of SCVs arrived to the place. They began constructing turrets and bunkers, and supply depots as makeshift walls. Planetary fortresses were set in place too.

"Oh no..." Twilight worried upon feeling a small earthquake, and then seeing in front of her several heavily armored vehicles with cannons in front of them. They placed themselves near the barricades, bolted down to the floor with the sound of machinery turning filling the air, and raised their main cannon. They were the main artillery unit, and the backbone of the Terran Arsenal. The Siege Tanks.

Now medivacs arrived too, with siege tanks in their cargo bay dropping them on the buildings, making themselves turn into siege mode. If this wasn't fortification, then nothing was.

"Just like old times." Mike said, remembering the times where he fought against the Zerg.

The buffalos, in the middle of the night, trained themselves against eachother, sharpened their horns, and prepared themselves for the attack too.

Then, the next day arrived.

A siege tank, with Mike on top, arrived near the barricade. Mike jumped off and cleaned the dust off his cloak before looking at the giant clock. Barely 10 minutes remained. "How are your forces, Sheriff?" He asked.

"Ready. Your men?"

Mike looked around to see his men focused, his artillery in place, his supply depots rising and creating a wall, and the planetary fortresses turning their guns.

"Ready."

"Come on, THINK." Rainbow Dash desperately tried coming up with a solution. "Think, think, think, think, think, think, think!"

Then, the clock hit the time, ringing it's giant bell for everyone to hear. Now everything was silent and focused.

Mike took out his revolver, opened the chamber, and placed the bullets on them before closing it and pulling the hammer back. His men did the same with their guns, and the ponies prepared their pies and stared into the horizon where the horde of buffalos could already be seen standing.

In the distance, the chief of the buffalos, after seeing everything and figuring it'd not be worth it, sighed.

Rainbow Dash gasped with everyone smiling. "He's not gonna do it!"

"...You got to share... You got to care... It's the right thing to do..." Pinkie started singing.

"Oh boy here we go." Mike sighed as he rolled his eyes.

The chief grunted in annoyance and fury.

"You got to share..."

"CHAAAARGE!!" The chief gave a warcry before leading the charge.

"DESTROY THEM!!" Mike yelled. The artillery batteries, the guns, and the explosions now deafened everyone's ears, but the horde did not stop at this, it's as if they had no numbers, no fear, only fury in their hearts, just like the Zerg. The artillery rounds struck most of the horde, but they still kept on coming, their strength comparable to those of the Protoss. They managed to break through the barricade and the supply depots by the sheer force of the charge, and entered the town to cause havoc everywhere. Now, what wasn't artillery shells or bullets, was pies flying left and right.

"Keep shooting the hairy bastards!!" Mike yelled. He seemed to forget that conventional weaponry doesn't even work in this world since it's a kid's show and death isn't written in it, well, except for the Terrans, who died more than they lived. At most, the explosions would throw them off-track. But it was still amusing.

"What do you mean we're all out of olives?!" A battlecruiser orbiting over the town yelled through the radio.

Mike ran and jumped over a mostly intact barricade with his revolver in hand, a buffalo chasing him and breaking through the barricade he just jumped over. Trying to figure out how to outsmart the buffalo, he did what any other sensible human being would do: He stopped, turned around, held his ground, and once the buffalo was close enough he headbutted him. Both were on the verge of falling unconscious now, but Mike took the opportunity and climbed on top of it and holding onto its horns.

"How do I steer this damn thing?!" He screamed, trying to control the beast's movements, only for it to crash into a building, break through the wall, and then break through the other wall getting outside. Mike, however, remained inside. "I say, these things are delicious." He spoke as he enjoyed an apple pie with a fork, while sporting a monocle and a bowtie. "Alas, duty calls for me." He left the apple pie, monocle and bowtie and rushed outside, where the buffalo which he drove awaited him standing on its hind legs, staring at him with fury. "Fight like big man!" He challenged the buffalo to a fist fight, only for both of them to stare above when they heard a strange cracking noise. The giant clock was falling right on top of them. Mike quickly got on top of the buffalo and they both ran out of its landing ground.

A siege tank artillery round struck him and the buffalo, sending them both flying on different directions. Mike crashlanded on the ground, drifting a bit on the dirt before finally stopping and standing up with gruelling pain and effort. He looked around to try to figure out what was going on. His eyes stumbled upon the Sheriff, who was taking cover behind a haystack throwing pies at the horders of buffalos, but unfortunately running out of ammo. Then, he saw the chief buffalo charging at him. He had the leader of the enemy right in his sights, so without losing another moment he quickly took out his revolver, aimed at the buffalo, and fired his shot.

The shot landed. Not on the buffalo, but on a stray flying pie which redirected its course straight at the chief striking at him and knocking him down to the ground. It wasn't what he initially expected but he shrugged it off as at least being something. All of this, in overly dramatic slow motion.

Once the chief fell, the fighting stopped. Every buffalo rushed to the fallen leader, the ponies now just staring at what had been done in this day. The chief's head was covered in pie, a buffalo started crying at their loss, a pony lowered her hat in respect and regret, spike began crying too...

All until a piece of pie fell onto the chief's tounge. He tasted it, and regained his strength by the delicious deliciousness of the delicious pie. "Yum! Hey, I've got a much better idea!"

A road was cut through the apple trees in the field, allowing the now stampeding buffalos to cross it. "We... Will allow the apple orchard to stay in exchange for a share of it's fruit, heh... Those... Delicious apple pies!" The chief explained. Apparently every buffalo liked the apple pies so much they also agreed with the chief. Now every time they stampede through it, they receive an apple pie each.

Ironically enough, in Terra they'd have been shot on sight. Not unlike what Mike tried doing but failing due to the hocus pocus of the powers that be.

"You guys make an entire economy out of apples..." Mike mentioned, walking up to the sheriff as they stared at the stampede.

"I have to thank ye for aiding us. If it wasn't for ye, we'd 'ave lost before this 'agreement' could've 'append."

"Yeah, cool story."

"As a token o'gratitude, you also get yer share of apple pies like them buffalos."

"Best. Day. Ever." He exclaimed with his hands up in the air.

'Dear, Princess Celestia. Friendship is a wondrous and powerful thing. Even the worst of enemies can become friends. You need understanding and compromise. You've got to share. You've got to care–'

"Hey, that's what I said!!" Pinkie Pie exclaimed.

Mike: AND THAT STARTED A WAR

Chapter 14: Return of the Archon Toilet - Part 1

"Chocolate rain..." Mike sang, walking around the open fields between Ponyville and Applejack's home, deciding to pay her a visit for the apple cider he and his men loved. "Some stay dry and others lose the game..."

As soon as he finished his verse, he could feel something impacting against his hood from the sky. He raised his vision and saw, slightly surprised, pink clouds in the skies raining a strange brown liquid. He extended his hand in front of him to let a drop fall to it and stared. "This..." He thought to himself. "IT'S RAINING SHI-- Oh wait it's chocolate milk." He wasn't as surprised as others would be. Mostly because he thought this was normal, since he had seen several weird thing by his standards already. Shrugging it off, he kept on walking while also seeing Rainbow Dash chasing a pink cloud.

Mike arrived to his destination, just in time to see Applejack shot by a machinegun of popcorn originating from a corn plant.

"Fancy life you got here." He said as he walked up to her and helped her up.

"I ain't got no idea what's going on now!!"

"Why would you wanna stop this?" Pinkie Pie questioned while swimming in a sea of popcorn.

"I heard about your troubles, Applejack," Rarity spoke after arriving with a waterproof coat, hat, and an umbrella, "and I came to see if there's anything I can do without getting wet. Or dirty. Or out from under my umbrella."

"So you mean this isn't actually normal?" Mike questioned.

"How would this even be considered normal!?" Applejack retorted.

"Well..." Mike sighed, remembering the Ursa Major, Nightmare Moon, Cloudsdale, and the entire concept of a fully functional medieval society managed by talking pastel coloured ponies with its economy centered mostly on apples. His thoughts, however, were interrupted by the sight of the apples in a tree tripling in size, with their new weight causing the trees to bend down to the ground. Critters appeared and began eating the apples, taking the opportunity.

"Fluttershy! Do somethin'!" Applejack pressured her.

"Now, Angel, you really shouldn't–" Boom. Now the bunnies had metre-long legs. "No! It's not possible! I must be seeing things!"

"By the Emperor!" Mike yelled in fright while backing off.

"Don't worry everyone." Twilight spoke, arriving with Spike and a book. "I've learned a new spell that'll fix everything."

She focused her energy, making her horn glow, and then released it on the fields. A giant wave of purple energy engulfed the scenery before changing it in absolutely no way at all. Everything remained the same. "My fail-safe spell... failed. What do we do?"

"Uh, give up?" Both Mike and Spike suggested.

"Spike, Mike, Twilight will come up with something." Rarity reassured them.

Mike sighed and decided to check how much was affected by this event while Twilight came up with a plan. He tinkered with his gasmask and brought up the usual HUD Terran commanders have. 'Okay, let's see here...' He thought to himself, seeing Rainbow Dash flying around and pushing the clouds together. He moved the map around, no fog of war being present due to his forces already having scouted the area several times already. The fields of corn were now field of popcorn, there was no way to distinguish puddles of mud from puddles of chocolate milk, and there were hordes upon hordes of long-legged pissed off bunnies stampeding around. Still not as weird as a Protoss planet. He raised an eyebrow upon seeing the hordes immediately changing course, and once he saw their destination being the clouds tied to a post, he figured the problem was partly solved and turned off his HUD.

"That was pretty fast." He said.

"You see, Spike, Mike? You should never give up. There's nothing we can't overcome if we all work together."

Spike suddenly burped a letter which landed on the ground. Twilight began reading it, and gasped once she realized what it was.

"Come on girls. Princess Celestia wants to see us all in Canterlot immediately!"

Afterwards...

"CHOO CHOO!!" Mike yelled before ramming himself on the castle's door, opening it the way only true Terrans would. Strapped to the side of his belt he had his revolver, and in his hands a C-14 Impaler Gauss Rifle, the standard weapon of the marines.

"Princess Celestia, we came as fast as we could." Twilight stated upon entering after Mike, with the rest of her friends following. "...Sorry about the door."

"Thank you, Twilight. Thank you all." The princess said.

"Is this about the weather? And the animals' weird behavior? What's happening out there? Why isn't my magic working? Is there–" She was silenced by the princess raising her hoof.

"Follow me." She ordered.

"I've called you here for a matter of great importance." The princess explained as she walked through a hall with stained glasses on the walls, with a giant red carpet on the floor. "It seems an old foe of mine, someone I thought I had defeated long ago, has returned. Mike, do you remember what we spoke about the morning after the Running of the Leaves?."

"Yeah."

"It's about him. His name... Is Discord. Discord is the mischevious spirit of disharmony. Before my sister and I stood up to him, he ruled Equestria in an eternal state of unrest and unhappiness. Luna and I saw how miserable life was for Earth ponies, Pegasi, and unicorns alike, so after discovering the Elements of Harmony, we combined our powers and rose up against him, turning him to stone."

"All right, Princess!" Rainbow Dash cheered.

"I thought the spell we cast would keep him contained forever but since Luna and I are no longer connected to the elements, the spell has become weaker and weaker. Upon Mike's arrival, I had thought it was a sign of how Discord's escape would be imminent. I don't know if it actually affected his arrival or if it was sheer accident without Discord's influence, but it doesn't matter now. Discord broke the spell."

"No longer connected?" Twilight questioned.

"This is Canterlot Tower, where the Elements are kept inside since all of you recovered them. I need you to wield the Elements of Harmony once again and stop Discord before he thrusts all of Equestria into eternal chaos."

"But why us? Why don't you-"

"Hey look! We're famous!!" Pinkie Pie exclaimed upon seeing herself in a stained glass with her friends.

"Hey I'm there too!" Mike added.

The stained glass was of the mane 6 using the Elements to bring down Nightmare Moon. Pictured was Nightmare Moon high above, being struck by the rays that emanated from the mane 6 with their Elements, and, behind them all was pictured an army of marines, flying barracks, and Mike leading them.

"You six showed the full potential of the elements by harnessing the magic of your friendship to beat a mighty foe. Mike, even though he had no power whatsoever and would lose in merely seconds, showed great courage, bordering on suicidal, against her and helped you, even as a distraction. And although Luna and I once wielded the elements, it is you who now control their power, and it is you who must defeat Discord."

"Princess Celestia, you can count on–" Twilight reassured her, only to be interrupted by Pinkie Pie.

"Hold on a second! Eternal Chaos comes with chocolate rain, you guys. Chocolate rain!"

"...The Heresy is strong with this one." Mike mentioned.

"Don't listen to her, Princess." Twilight said. "We'd be honored to use the Elements of Harmony again."

Celestia stepped forward to a decorated door with a hole in the middle. She placed her horn in the hole, accidental innuendos aside, and focused her energy to open it. Once open, behind it was revealed a case decorated with gems.

"Ooh. You can keep the Elements. I'll take that case!" Rarity stated.

"Have no fear, ponies. I have total confidence that you will be able to defeat Discord..." She stated, using her magic to levitate the case and open it in front of them. "...With these!"

It was completely empty.

"Alright!" Mike exclaimed while punching his hand. "We'll bludgeon him to death with that case!" He didn't realize there was supposed to be something inside.

Everyone gasped and became petrified.

"Oh, well." Pinkie Pie said without a care in the world. "If anyone needs me, I'll be outside in the chocolate puddles with a giant swizzle straw."

"The elements! They're gone!" Twilight exclaimed.

"That chamber is protected by a powerful spell that only I can break! This doesn't make sense!" Celestia said, confused, until a strange laugh which echoed in the castle grabbed the attention of everyone pressent.

"Make sense? Oh, what fun is there in making sense?" The strange voice questioned.

"Discord... Show yourself!"

The voice chuckled before continuing. "Did you miss me, Celestia?" It asked before taking control of a draconequus pictured in one of the stained glasses. "I missed you. It's quite lonely being encase--"

Bang. The single shot of a gun echoed in the room followed by the sound of glass breaking appart and falling. Mike had shot the stained glass where Discord had showed himself, startling everyone all the while smoke escaped his rifle's barrel.

"Well I guess I could call that hospitali--"

Bang. Mike shot the other stained glass where Discord took form.

"You're not even going to let me talk, are yo--"

Bang.

"I'm guessing yo--"

Bang.

"I'm running out of gla--"

Bang.

"Will you stop that?!"

Silence.

"Thanks. Now, as I was sa--"

Bang.

"You sure like interrupting your elders..." Discord now mentioned, taking form of the drawings on the floor, which Mike could not destroy. "Ahh, Celestia, Celestia, Celestia... It's quite lonely being encased in stone, but you wouldn't know that, would you, because I don't turn ponies into stone."

"Enough!" Celestia raised her voice. "What have you done with the Elements of Harmony?"

"Oh, I just borrowed them for a teensy little while."

"You'll never get away with this, Discord!"

"Oh, I'd forgotten how grim you can be, Celestia. It's really quite boring."

"Mike..." Twilight gained his attention with irritation. "Stop that." She stated, stopping him from planting explosives all over the floor.

"And who are you supposed to be, now? I haven't seen you since my last visit..." Discord asked Mike.

"Me?"

"Well, of course, there isn't any other towering figure like you over here."

Not a second later, two other ghosts which were with him uncloaked.

"I stand corrected then." Discord continued. "How did you get into this realm with your 'friends'? I'd have known if your kind existed in my time which, obviously, did not."

"Archon toilet." He gave the most direct response he could give.

"You love talking in codes. I like you already."

"Stop stalling, Discord!" Celestia spoke. "What have you done with the Elements of Harmony?"

"Oh, so boring, Celestia. Really? Fine, I'll tell you, but I'll only tell you my way. To retrieve your missing elements just make sense of this change of events. Twists and turns are my master plan. Then find the elements back where you began." Afterwards, he left with a trail of laughter behind him.

"Can we go home now?" Fluttershy asked with fright, walking up to Twilight.

"What do you reckon he meant? Twists and turns and ending back where we started?" Applejack asked, doing the same.

"Twists and turns... twists and turns..." Twilight thought to herself, walking over to the destroyed window which overlooked the labyrinth. "Twists and turns! That's it! I bet Discord hid the elements in the palace labyrinth!"

"Good luck, my little ponies." Celestia spoke up. "The fate of Equestria is in your hooves."

"Thanks, Princess. We won't let you down."

The mane 6 began running outside, the ghosts and Mike following them, only for Mike to be stopped by Celestia.

"Mike." She called for him, stopping him on his tracks.

"Yes?"

"They might be the only ones who can stop Discord now, an entity which can alter reality with his power, but even then, they're only ponies, and you can alter reality in your own way too. Help them as much as you can, they cannot fail now."

"Understood."

"Go, time is short."

The ponies and Mike arrived to the entrace of the labyrinth at last, their search for the Elements now beginning.

"W-We have to go in there?" Fluttershy asked.

"Nope! Dopey Discord forgot about these babies! I'll just do a quick flyover and we'll have the Elements in no time." She took flight, only for her wings to disappear in mid-air, making her fall to the ground. "My wings!"

Then Fluttershy's wings disappeared, making her scream.

Then Rarity's and Twilight's horn. "Your horn!" They both spoke in unison. "My horn! Ahhh!"

"What." Mike barely muttered, having no idea of what was going on.

"Yeah I guess I'm th'only average here..." Applejack sighed, seeing as nothing changed at all for her.

Discord laughed, appearing in front of them in a thunderstorm and frightening the ponies, all while laughing. "You–You should see the looks on your faces. Priceless!" He kept on laughing histerically.

"Give us our wings and horns back!" Twilight demanded.

"You'll get them back in good time. I simply took them to ensure there's no cheating. You see, this is the first rule of our game: no flying, and no magic."

"The first rule?" Rainbow Dash questioned.

"The second rule is everypony has to play or the game is over, and I win. Good luck, everypony!" He laughed as he disappeared.

"Never fear, girls. We have each other!" Twilight stated.

"Yeah! Like Twilight said, there's nothing we can't overcome if we all stick together!" Rainbow Dash added.

"All right, girls, let's do this!"

"Alright everyone chill the Hell out, I got this." Mike spoke up, turning on his HUD and preparing to order his army to enter the area. Technically what he was doing wasn't magic.

"Mike, such brilliance to find loopholes..." The voice of Discord echoed. "You're a smart man, as far as the adjective 'smart' goes of course. Here's a decision for you to take, in which in your hands a mistake you can prevent... I won't stop you from using your abilities to help your friends in this quest, but then great repercussions you'll have to expect. Hahahahah!"

"See if I ca--"

"Mike. Don't do it." Twilight interrupted him.

"Dammit..."

"Alright then, let's go!"

"Together!" The ponies said in unison as they stepped forward. A second later, walls of plants separated them from each other, forcing them to take their paths all on their own. They screamed in fright as they raised, not expecting such thing.

"Stay calm, girls!" Twilight reassured everyone. "Everypony head to the middle as fast as you can, and we'll regroup there!"

"Why don't you guys just break through the walls? They're not concrete." Mike thought to himself. "Fine... You want it the old-school way? Then fine. Ask me if it's fine, it's fine."

Time later...

"Ugh... I hate walking..." Mike complained. "If only I had that hellion I raced in... Or a vehicle. Or someone to carry me. I wasn't cut out for this! I'm a commander, not a scout dammit!" Then he remembered that most of his scouting groups ended up dead. "Oh boy."

He kept on walking the labyrinth, hitting several dead ends and making no progress at all. Even the good ol' fashioned 'Always follow the wall to your right' served of nothing. Minutes passed without being able to figure out which was to go, figuring he was walking in circles, or in the labyrinth's case, in rectangles. All until a segment of the wall opened on its own, as if it was controlled by someone. Seeing enough cheap ripoff horror movies, he decided to ignore it and keep walking his own way. Then another segment opened. He ignored it. Another opened. He ignored it. Apparently the labyrinth got tired and decided to trap Mike in a 1x1 walled in box, with one side opening on its own.

"Well, guess I have no choice." He sighed as he looked at the opening. "Headfirst into glory!" He yelled, turning around and charging full speed right through the wall of leaves behind him, accidentally tripping over Twilight Sparkle who was running behind it. "Oh hey Twilight."

"Tsk... Smart bugger..." Discord thought to himself. No one heard him.

"Mike! First time I'm ever glad to see you again."

"Eh, I'll take that as a good sign." He said, standing up and then helping her up. "So, met anyone yet?"

"No, only you. Any idea how far we are to the center?"

"Can I check with the HUD?"

"No."

"Then no."

Twilight sighed. "Let's keep running."

A segment of the wall opened next to Twilight and Mike who were running, revealing Applejack a distance behind it. They stopped on their tracks and walked through the opening, now seeing Applejack though with something different.

"Applejack! Thank goodness! I thought I heard voices over here. Who were you talking to?" Twilight asked with Mike following behind.

"I was talking to... uh... nopony! Nopony whatsoever!"

"What?"

"What happened to your skin? It lost... Colour..." Mike asked.

"Nothin'! Come on, uh, we best be goin'." She answered, walking away.

"Did Applejack just...?" Twilight asked herself. "Come on, Twilight! Applejack wouldn't lie."

"Am I the only one noticing her change of colour? Just me? Alright, fantastic."

Mike, Greypplejack and Twilight stood in front of an oppening on the wall staring at a bunch of baloons popping, confused. Once they disappeared, however, they found out Pinkie Pie was behind.

"Pinkie Pie! Are we glad to see you!" Twilight cheered.

"Oh boy, another grey one." Mike whispered to himself.

"Oh you are, huh? Why? Need a good laugh?" She ranted, walking past her.

"Pinkie?" She questioned. "What do you suppose has her so upset?" She asked Applejack. "It's not like her."

"I didn't notice anything strange about Pinkie."

"Well, for starters, she's... Oh, I don't know... Grey!" Mike stated. Twilight didn't really pay attention to his statement.

"Weird." Twilight said to herself. "Better pick up the pace before the stress of this gets the better of all of us."

Then, a baloon began following them as they left. It wasn't long until Mike shot it just because he could, not because he saw anything weird with it.

"I'm still wondering why you guys don't break through the walls like I did." Mike questioned, following Twilight, Greypplejack and Greynkie Pie.

Not after long, they met a segment of the wall which was purely stone. Realizing this was rather different than the other segments, they stopped to examine it, but before they could do anything it crumbled upon itself. Behind it, after the dust was cleared, they spotted Rarity hauling a giant ... Boulder.

"Rarity! Are we glad to see... Why are you carrying a humongous boulder?" Twilight asked.

"What do you mean, "boulder"? This big beautiful bedazzling rock is a diamond! And it's all mine. Keep your envious little eyes off it! I found it and it's mine fair and square!" She grunted, slowly away with it with incredible effort.

"And I'm here being the only one who can actually notice them being Gray..." Mike sighed, beginning to walk away with the group.

"Open sesame!" Mike yelled in front of a grass wall with his rifle high up in the air, expecting it to open. Mike turned his head around once he heard the noise of the wall right behind him opening. "Dammit."

"Fluttershy! I'm so glad to see a friendly face." Twilight said upon seeing her behind the wall. "This awful labyrinth is getting to every pony."

"Hey, 50 bucks that's another grey one!" Mike yelled, not even knowing what to expect.

"Aw, boo hoo hoo! Why don't you wave your magic little horn and make everything all right?" Fluttershy angrily retorted.

"Uhh..."

"Oh, that's right, you can't. You don't have one." Fluttershy taunted her while whipping her tail on her face.

"You owe me 50 bucks." Mike mentioned while walking up to Twilight.

"What is happening to my friends?" Twilight questioned, seeing them acting the opposite of what they previously were.

"What do we do with a drunken sailor... What do we do with a drunken sailor..." Mike sang to himself while him, Twilight, Greypplejack, Greynkie Pie, Greyrity and Greyttershy kept on walking to find the Elements. "What do we do with a drunken sailor... Early in the morning..."

"Must... find... Rainbow Dash." Twilight gasped for air, carrying the boulder Rarity saw as a diamond. "As a team... we're unstoppable. Rainbow Dash won't let us down."

"Well, looky there." Applejack pointed out. "Rainbow Dash is flying away. She's abandonin' us."

"Now I know that's a lie." She said, but once she looked up she gasped. "How can it be?"

There she was, Greybow Dash, flying away and thus breaking one of Discord's rules.

"Whelp, we're fucked." Mike stated, readying his rifle for the worst.

As if answering Mike's statement, the skies darkened with clouds, the walls lowered themselves, and all that remained from the labyrinth was a simple crater, void of anything but dirt.

"Well, well, well. Somepony broke the 'no wings, no magic' rule." Discord spoke as he appeared from the dust, giving them their horns and wings back. "Game's over, my little ponies. You didn't find your precious elements. Looks like we might be due for a big old storm of chaos! Hahahahahahah!"

Chapter 15: Return of the Archon Toilet - Part 2

"He can warp reality to his will, then..." Mike whispered to himself, looking all over the crater. Discord didn't apply the slightest amount of effort to create this scenery and everything he had influence over. Then, he turned around to see Discord and Twilight exchanging words in an argument. Growing tired of games, he readied his rifle, aimed at Discord, and fired. However, nothing changed, as if he had shot a blank. It wasn't clear whether he missed, or if Discord had influenced the bullet somehow.

"You should respect your elders, Mike." Discord mocked him right after showing Twilight how he never mentioned the Elements being in the labyrinth. "I never said they were in the labyrinth..." He told Twilight.

"But... But..."

"Keep trying, Twilight Sparkle. Maybe the magic of friendship can help you. Now if you'll excuse me, I have some chaos to wreak." He spoke before disappearing, and in the skies appearing pink clouds raining with chocolate.

"Did we lose already?" Mike questioned as he walked up to Twilight, the sound of his boots stepping over the mud being heard.

Twilight sighed in annoyance. "No, we just need to find the Elements... Wherever they may be..."

The sound of her friends fighting among themselves caught Mike's attention, who turned around and watched them in slight amusement.

"Ugh..." Twilight ranted. "I just wanna go home... Wait a minute... Home! 'Back where you began!' The Elements must be in Ponyville!" She realized. "Come on, girls." She pressured the others while walking to the now surreal painting that was Ponyville. "I'm certain this is what Discord's riddle really meant. If we get back to the library, I have a book that I just know could give us a clue."

"I'm still thinking we won't have much chance-- Watch it!" Mike warned Twilight, though it was for naught, for Twilight had already been stomped to the ground by a horde of long-legged bunnies. "...How horrifying."

"Good boy, Angel." He heard Greyttershy speaking. "Mama's so proud."

Suddenly, it was night.

"Wow, I can see so much better now." He also heard Greypplejack stating. Not after long, he could feel something striking against him from behind. He turned around and what little he could see were Greypplejack next to him, and Greyrity, Greyttershy and Greynkie Pie on the floor, as if they had been struck by something too. "I meant to do that." Greypplejack mentioned.

Suddenly, it was day.

"Discord's turned our dirt roads into soap!" Twilight ranted.

"Thank God, I was thinking I stepped on something else." Mike stated.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" Discord questioned while flamboyantly sliding around. "This is the new and improved Ponyville, and these are only my first of changes."

"First... Oh boy..." Mike sighed to himself.

"Picture it: The chaos capital of the world." Discord boasted, lifting Twilight for her to see.

Suddenly, night.

"I can't picture anything. It's too dark."

Discord let her go, causing her to fall to the soapy ground.

"Well, wait a few minutes and you'll see it in the beautiful light of day. Or not."

Then he flamboyantly jumped and flamboyantly disappeared.

"Ponyville, the chaos capital of the world? Not if I have anything to say about it." Twilight cheered herself up.

"Don't worry, you won't, heheheh." Greyttershy retorted, sliding on the soap road.

Afterwards, they decided to head to Twilight's home. Once they arrived they all entered, except for Greyrity who clinged to her boulder/diamond, not letting go. Annoyed, Mike kicked it into the home, breaking a wall, and causing her to rush inside. Mission accomplished.

Then once Twilight found the book relating to the Elements of Harmony, something else started. Greyttershy stole the book, then passing it to Greypplejack. Then to Greynkie Pie, and so on, for the sole purpose of keeping it away from Twilight. It wasn't until Mike intervened by punching Greypplejack in the face, throwing Spike like a cannonball against Greynkie Pie, and intercepting the book that everything calmed down; and once Twilight opened the book, she found the Elements lying inside.

No one cared in the slightest.

Twilight forcefully made them care.

Spike was promoted to Rainbow Dash, who was missing.

Mike sneezed.

Then, they all rushed outside.

'Tom' almost landed on top of Greynkie Pie. It landed on top of Mike.

"Well, well, well," Discord greeted them, "I see you've found the Elements of Harmony. How terrifying!"

"Discord! I've figured out your lame riddle." Twilight stated.

"Help..." Mike begged.

"You're in for it now!" Twilight continued.

"I certainly am. You've clearly out-dueled me, and now it's time to meet my fate. I'm prepared to be defeated now, ladies. Fire when ready." He taunted.

"Formation, now!" Twilight ordered. At her command, the Grey ones gathered up with Spike following. Twilight's eyes lit up and the ponies began floating, ready to discharge their energies. Nope, it failed. Miserably. They fell to the ground.

"What's going on?" Twilight questioned.

"Mine's workin'. There must be somethin' wrong with yours." Greypplejack answered.

"I HATE the Elements of Harmony!" Greynkie Pie stated.

"Hmph! Garbage." Greyttershy ranted before throwing her necklace away.

"Shut up and get me out of here!" Mike despaired.

"MINE!" Greyrity yelled with greed, grabbing what Greyttershy threw.

"Sorry, Twilight. I guess I'd better get back upstairs and clean up the library. Good luck with all this-" Spike spoke before being interrupted by Greyttershy who made him trip on her tail on purpose. "Whoa!"

"Oops, sorry, Rainbow Crash. Heheh." Greyttershy taunted.

"Bravo, ponies, bravo!" Discord cheered while clapping. "Harmony in Equestria is officially dead. Discord rules, Celestia drools." Then he dodged Greyrity's boulder/diamond that Mike threw in annoyance once he figured out how to escape from under it, and began sliding away.

"Next time remind me never to trust on you guys again to help me in my darkest hour." Mike ranted, cracking his neck like a cement mixer while walking up to Twilight.

The group spontaneously began arguing, resulting in each one going their separate ways, except for Mike who stood with Twilight.

"FINE!" Twilight yelled. "Leave! See if I care! I don't need you guys either! With friends like you, who needs..." She began realizing what happened, lowering her vision. "Enemies..." At this point she was turning grey already.

Mike's heart skipped a beat upon seeing Twilight now grey and walking away. 'Before my sister and I stood up to him, he ruled Equestria in an eternal state of unrest and unhappiness. Luna and I saw how miserable life was for Earth ponies, Pegasi, and unicorns alike, so after discovering the Elements of Harmony, we combined our powers and rose up against him, turning him to stone.' He remembered what Celestia said back in the castle. 'And although Luna and I once wielded the elements, it is you who now control their power, and it is you who must defeat Discord.' He remembered another thing she said. It was the mane 6 who were supposed to defeat Discord, but now they were scattered and corrupted, their colours gone. If he was any other sentient being, he'd say it was all lost already, but he remembered yet another thing. '...An entity which can alter reality with his power...' '...And you can alter reality in your own way too.'

"Guess it's all or nothing now." He muttered

'Here's a decision for you to take, in which in your hands a mistake you can prevent... I won't stop you from using your abilities to help your friends in this quest, but then great repercussions you'll have to expect. Hahahahah!'

"As if I'd lose anything now." He sighed, walking towards his main base behind Twilight's home.

"Everyone listen up!" He yelled, kicking the door of the main room of the Command Center and entering the room with his officers. "I want every single resource we know the location of strip mined to its core."

"Why the hurry?" One officer questioned. "We already have three entire campaigns worth of stockpile already."

"I don't care. Even with those, it'll not be enough. I want barracks, factories and starports built everywhere there's space and start pumping out units. In this world there is no 'population cap', so I don't want to hear an excuse for any building not producing anything."

"Did you anger a dragon once again?" An SCV jokingly asked.

"Something that can warp reality escaped from its prison. That sudden new scenery out there? It caused it."

The room became tremendously silent. They all had their traumas after fighting the Protoss, even though they don't warp reality but their powers are close nevertheless. Then, everything became almost chaotic as men ran one way and the other, scrambling to manage everything in Mike's territory. It wasn't an exaggeration to say that Mike's territory encompassed everywhere that he ever visited, the minerals and geysers appearing everywhere and the nonexistent population cap not preventing him from actually holding something of such size with efficiency. If someone were to give a rough estimation of how many bases Mike had, it wouldn't be unlikely for him to say a number near the hundreds.

Time later...

"Hmmm..." Discord smiled to himself in his throne with his left hand on his cheek, upon seeing a group of four vikings doing a reconnaissance flight over Ponyville. "Taking chances, are we? I just wonder what you'll do. Alas, knowing you it'd be painfully obvious. I guess the proper question would be how long it takes you to throw the first rock."

"Recon team Delta-3 reporting." The sound echoed in the command center, with everyone now paying attention. There were hundreds of teams flying all over Equestria, but only those who found something of interest reported in. "We're seeing a unicorn running through the fields towards Applejack's home."

"Describe the unicorn." Mike ordered.

"Purple, straight hair--"

"Purple? You mean, not gray?"

"Fully saturated, just like days ago."

"Recon team Alpha-2 reporting. Discord has been spotted. I repeat, Discord has been spotted. He is currently located in Ponyville's center sitting in a throne. He's... He's looking at us. He knows we're here."

Mike and his men looked at eachother in silence. One thing was finding out Twilight had been de-corrupted somehow, but the other thing was Discord knowing what they were doing. They all knew Discord forbidded Mike from using his army and thus he'd be breaking a rule, but a lack of action on his part brought confusion to them. After a while, Mike decided to take actions.

"I see them." Mike said on top of a viking flying over the open fields of Greypplejack's home upon spotting Twilight now facing Applejack. Three other vikings also followed him.

They closed in, and once close enough they transformed in mid-air to their walker mode, landing on the ground with fury. The four pilots quickly opened their cockpits, jumped off and rushed forward with certain objects.

"--Mike?!" Twilight exclaimed with surprise.

Mike and his three pilots didn't stop running, however. They closed in with Greypplejack and threw their objects at her, revealed to be actually buckets of orange paint. Now Greypplejack was fully saturated and back as she was days ago.

"...What in tarnation..." Greypplejack questioned.

"Mike!" Twilight sighed in irritation before rushing forwards and casting a memory spell upon Greypplejack. Once the spell did its purpose, Greypplejack returned to her former self, Applejack.

"...What in tarnation..." She questioned again upon realizing she was covered in orange paint.

"Well, that didn't work..." Mike stated.

"Wh-what happened? Twilight! I saw a vision of us feudin' and fightin'. I couldn't face the truth, so I started tellin' lies. Can you ever forgive me?"

"I already have." Twilight answered. "Come on!"

Greyttershy's home was... Destroyed, to say the least, because the four vikings tried entering by force. Not succeeding but not failing either. Twilight casted the spell on Greyttershy, being held by Applejack's rope, and now returning to her former self, Fluttershy.

"Oh no! Twilight, Applejack, Mike, I just had the worst dream!"

"What do you think you're doing? Get away from my gem!" Greyrity's yelling could be heard from outside her home. "Get away--!" Her house flared bright for a second, and a moment later, the giant boulder was shot through the roof. "Let us never speak of this again." Rarity spoke.

"And I-I turned gray!" Pinkie Pie giggled, being carried on top of a viking. "Can you believe it?!"

Then, the group went to Greynbow Dash's home, only to find out that she was not there. Only to find out that she was actually in a cloud nearby.

"Discord's still on the loose! We need you to help us defeat him with your element, Loyalty!" Twilight yelled.

"Pfft. Loyalty, schmoyalty! Have you guys seen Ponyville? It's a disaster! I'm staying here in Cloudsdale where everything's awesome."

"How in Equestria can she think that tiny patch of cloud is Cloudsdale?" Rarity questioned.

"The same way he got you to think that cheap rock was a bona fide diamond." Applejack answered.

"I thought we agreed never to speak of that again."

"Time for Plan B." Twilight suggested.

Afterwards...

"GET BACK HERE YOU FLYING PIECE OF--"

"Mike!" Twilight yelled. "We have to capture her, not KILL her!"

Mike, his three vikings, and the uncorrupted group were chasing Rainbow Dash through the skies of Ponyville.

"The target is initiating evasive maneuvers." A viking stated upon seeing Rainbow Dash flying around them.

"I got this." Another viking stated, launching a missile towards Rainbow Dash. It didn't directly hit, but detonated close enough to her to throw her off balance for a few seconds and numb her senses.

Applejack took the opportunity to try lassoing Rainbow Dash, but unfortunately missed.

"Just like in the training, chaps!" Mike yelled, flying full speed towars Rainbow Dash, elevating a bit, and then transforming in mid-air causing him to fall. Of course, he fell right at Rainbow Dash, hugging her with his gatling guns and trapping her in a bear hug. It didn't seem to work as expected, since she could still fly with enough strength to carry the monstrosity of a viking.

Then the other three vikings did the same. A surprisingly effective plan, considering they all fell to the ground at a tremendous speed, crashing below.

"Lemme go! I don't need you guys! Leave me alone!" Rainbow Dash screamed, only her head being shown due to her body being caught in the wrecks of four vikings.

Twilight advanced, Mike and the others standing behind her as she casted the spell upon her and succeeding.

"Wh-what happened? How's Ponyville? Where are the Elements?! Did we stop Discord? ...What's this thing I'm caught in?!"

Everyone now cheered, seeing as they had uncorrupted the last bearer of the Elements.

"Maybe it's a little early for a group hug." Twilight mentioned upon seeing dancing buffalos in ballet outfits.

Time later...

"There he is, Discord..." Twilight stated. Mike was on foot with the mane 6, walking with them through the surrealistic painting which was Ponyville.

"Wait, hold up." Mike ordered the ponies.

"What? He's right there, we could end this now." Rainbow Dash rushed him.

"Isn't he omnipresent and omnipotent? Even he wasn't, I'm sure he saw us uncorrupting eachother. He even saw me using my men, even though he forbid me from it, and yet he did nothing. It doesn't take a genius to realize he could be actually waiting for us."

"Fine, what do you suggest?" Twilight asked.

"He already knows I'm using my army." He spoke before steps and engines could be heard in the distance, and a mini earthquake following. He turned around and ordered his forces, now without number, to surround him. There they were, a countless number of marines, marauders, siege tanks, vikings and banshees, battlecruisers, hellions and thors, ready to fight and moving to surround him. It was impossible that Discord didn't feel the earthquake nor hear the noises already. Once they marched forward past him towards Discord, he gave the order to the ponies. "Alright, move."

"Chaos is a wonderful, wonderful thing." Discord spoke sitting on his throne directly in front of them.

"Not as wonderful as friendship." Twilight retorted.

"Oh, this again?"

Mike, however, was focused in other matters like monitoring the area, his army, Discord, and every other detail that might escape his attention.

"That's right. You couldn't break apart our friendship for long." Applejack stated.

"Oh, Applejack, don't lie to me. I'm the one who made you a liar." He reminded her before making her levitate towards him, and soon enough the others too. "Will you ever learn?"

A barrage of EMP rounds fired by the ghosts soon stunned Discord, making him lose concentration and nullifying his magic against the ponies, releasing them to the ground.

"I'll tell you what we've learned Discord." Twilight spoke up. "We've learned that friendship isn't always easy. But there's no doubt it's worth fighting for."

"Ugh, gag." He complained in disgust. "Fine, go ahead, try and use your little Elements, 'frenemies'. Just make it quick. I'm missing some excellent chaos here."

"All right, ladies, let's show him what friendship can do!" Twilight rallied them up.

"It begins..." Mike whispered to himself, monitoring the events with his HUD from a bird's-eye-view of the scenery.

"Wait-wait-wait!" Pinkie spoke, drinking chocolate from a small cloud.

"Dammit, Pinkie..." Mike whispered.

Then Pinkie returned to her position. The elements lit up with the ponies now levitating, Discord yawning but soon enough his expression changing to surprise.

"Huh. What's this?" He asked, seeing the elements activate. "...No." He began despairing.

Out of the group, a rainbow was shot into the sky high above, now arcing towards Discord himself. What they didn't expect, however, was Discord simply teleporting a metre away and dodging the blast completely. His throne evaporated, but that's all that happened. The spell had failed.

"...WHAT?!" Twilight and Mike asked loudly.

Discord fell to the ground and hysterically began laughing, almost choking on his own tears. "You really think I was going to fall that easily? Hahahah!!" He sighed to himself trying to recover, and once he stood up he smiled at Mike. "Such a tragedy that you decided to take your decision. Alas, I am a draconequus of my word, and I shall punish you for your... Lack of control over yourself." He laughed to himself before snapping his fingers. Nothing appeared to change except for the sound giant explosion echoing with thunder and lightning falling.

The ponies, the Terrans and Mike were just staring around to see something which might've happened, expecting anything.

"Commander." An officer spoke to mike through his HUD.

"Speak." Mike answered while placing his finger over his gasmask's ear.

"We have lost communication to several of our expansions."

"What?! How?!"

"There's no clear understanding of what happened. Communications were cut. We cannot determine if it was interference or anything else."

Mike sighed. "Check up on them. I'm already paranoid enough now."

"Yes, commander."

Discord smiled even more.

"Your time is short, 'Commander'." He spoke before disappearing.

"Mike, what's going on?" Twilight asked in confusion.

"I don't think I really want to know..."

"Commander!!" A voice screamed from his HUD.

"Yes?"

"The bases which we lost communications with, they're hostile!"

"What!?"

"They're attacking us!! They're--"

The communication was cut short once again.

"Oh boy..." Mike whispered to himself.

Not long after, great part of the Terran forces began changing colour. From their usual red to a light grey colour, as if they had changed sides. They now began attacking Mike's forces, who now retaliated.

"Run!!" Mike yelled to the ponies, legging it. "It's only a matter of time before--" He was cut short by the shells of the enemy siege tanks falling near him, causing him to be sent into the ground by the shockwave.

Half of Mike's Terran forces had turned on him, now following Discord, the Spirit of Chaos.

So it began, the HorusDiscord Heresy.

Several hours later...

"The hostile forces are engaging us here, here, and here." An officer inside Mike's command center in Ponyville spoke while pointing at a map with several other men and Mike in the room listening. He had pointed at several locations in the outskirts of Ponyville. "We can use the buildings as choke points for our enemy to fall into and use our siege tanks to crush them."

"Fine." Mike sighed. "Use the SCVs to build bunkers behind those choke points to slow them down and allow the siege tanks to do as much damage as they can. What's their army's composition?"

"They're using every unit in their arsenal, like us, but they are using a bioball composition for the most part, contrasting with our main use of siege tanks and vikings."

"They have the mobility advantage then. What about the other bases? How are they holding off?"

"Most have either fallen or turned to Discord's side. Appaloosa was one of the first one to fall. Right now the bases in the territories of Canterlot and Ponyville remain uncorrupted. Total number of bases near the fifties. The enemy forces aren't limited with population capacity either, their numbers are without limit just like ours."

Mike sighed, then whispered to himself. "This is the first somewhat conventional engagement I've had in this world..." He turned around and now spoke to Twilight, who was also in the room. "I need you and your friends to head to Canterlot. I'll stay here and try to deal with this, but Canterlot is a castle, it's easier to defend than most things here, so it's a fallback point if things get ugly. Understood?"

"...Alright." Twilight answered, worried, but listening to him once she realized that now he spoke with all his mind in the matter. She realized that, in this regard, he knew better than her.

Four hours later...

Twilight stood near the entrace as armies of red Terrans entered the castle. Marines, Ghosts, Marauders, Thors, Siege tanks, everything in the terran arsenal, but in such numbers that suggested they were not fresh troops, but others that fell back from another place.

"Excuse me." Twilight asked a marauder. "Where did you come from?"

"Ponyville." The marauder answered before walking away.

"Ponyville...?" Twilight asked to herself.

"Then where's Mike?" Rainbow Dash added to the question.

"Did he..." Applejack began thinking.

A day had passed, Mike nowhere in sight with everyone already expecting the worst.

"He's alive!!" A marine spoke up from the multitude.

"Where is him?! Where is him!?" The marauder from before, who was Mike's manager in the race asked while pushing through the hundreds of Terrans. "Get out of my way! I'm going to kill him!"

Soon enough, he met up with Mike himself, who just arrived.

"You are the luckiest... The canniest..." The marauder spoke in front of him. "...And the most reckless bastard I ever knew!!" Now, he hugged him with enough to actually make a bone crack.

"My... Spine..." Mike whimpered.

"Bless you laddie."

"'Raud, where's Twilight and the rest?"

"A great host, you say?" Celestia questioned.

"All of Equestria is emptied." Mike spoke, referring to the corrupted Terrans who had pushed his forces out.

"How many?"

"Ten thousand strong at least."

"...Ten thousand?!"

"It is an army corrupted for a single purpose... To destroy me and my men."

Celestia was struck silent.

"They'll be here by nightfall." Mike added. And by nightfall he meant in around 10 minutes, since night falls tremendously fast nowadays. Mike knew too well there were no barracks, factories or starports in Canterlot, thus, no way to replenish his troops once lost. "I say we let them come."

Afterly, in the middle of the night 10 minutes later...

"I see light in the distance." A ghost stated over the wall.

"We're in for a wild night..." Mike added, walking up next to the ghost.

Over that same wall lied Siege tanks and infantry ready for the engagement. Hundreds upon hundreds of Terrans in Canterlot, the last territory remaining, prepared to fight to their last breath with guns, artillery, and grenades. Everyone could hear the steps of the corrupted armies closing in, but after getting close enough, they stopped. They did nothing, just stand there, taunting them with their presence.

"Guns!" Mike yelled. At his command, everyone readied their guns at the corrupted hordes.

But, not at his command, someone fired a shot which struck right in the visor of a corrupted marine outside the walls.

"...Whoops." The marine nervously said.

"Hell of a shot, mister." Mike complimented him.

"Damn straight." A marauder added.

"Without a scope?" A ghost questioned. Then the noncorrupted terrans spontaneously began complimenting him, up until the corrupted hordes now charged forwards and began opening fire, Mike crouching and dodging a shot.

"Fire back!" Mike yelled. At his command, the infantry opened fire and the siege tanks unloaded their guns at the hordes. Explosions lit up the night with chocolate raining down the skies. The grey hordes kept on charging, ignoring the tremendous casualties the sustained until they were in range to shoot back. Grey marines shot back while also setting up ladders at the walls.

"Delivery from Korhal!" Mike boasted before punching a grey marine right in the visor as he climbed the ladder, causing it to fall down. "I could use some sort of melee weapon now..." He sighed to himself, realizing the Terran arsenal had no melee weapons, not even spears. "SHI--" He yelled, dodging a grey marauder which almost fell on him after climbing the wall.

Once they got to the walls, red and grey marines, marauder, ghosts and reapers were using their guns as clubs if not using their own fists. Now everyone was kung-fu fighting.

After executing a roundhouse kick on a reaper's jetpack, activating it and sending it flying against the hordes, he looked out the walls only to see several marines in a testudo formation with their ballistic shields closing in to the wall's gates. "The gates!!" He screamed. The siege tanks changed their aim and fired upon the testudo, crushing it with their fire. No wonder their ballistic shields didn't stop the artillery shields. However, not after long 7 more testudos arrived. Mike had forgotten that the corrupted forces still have buildings of their own to replenish their troops. "Oh boy..." He sighed upon now seeing a grey ghost carrying a nuke in his hands closing in to the walls. He took the rifle from a dead ghost and began firing upon him, striking several shots but still not killing the bastard before it got to close. Apparently Terrans can go on without half their body as long as they still have 1 HP remaining. "Get down!!" Mike screamed, jumping down the walls. Of course, there was no fear in jumping down a hundred metres tall wall since there was no collision damage anyways.

The wall exploded, with a mushroom cloud now emanating from the wrecks. Whoever didn't get caught in the blast was sent flying. Mike was caught in the blast too, which sent him to the ground right behind the wall, with grey terrans now charging through the gap towards him.

"Mike!" The marauder from before yelled, before jumping right off the wall onto the grey Terrans. Unfortunately his weight, added with the mud that the chocolate rain caused, made him dig into the ground and be half stuck. "This sucks." He ranted.

Behind Mike, a wave of red marines arrived and stood with their guns ready.

"Fire!!" Mike commanded. At his order, the marines fired and laid waste to those who were trying to enter the gap. "Fall back!! Get everybody to the castle!!" Mike ordered, seeing as the battle was being lost.

"The walls are taken. It is over." Celestia spoke. Her cynicism getting the best of her.

"I said this place will never fall while my men defend it! They still defend it! They have died defending it!" Mike yelled.

The noise of a battering ram ramming against the door startled them. Though they have grown used to it in such a short time span.

"They're breaking in!" A ghost yelled.

"Is there no other way for us to get out of here?" Mike questioned. He received no answer. "Is there no other way?!"

"There is one passage." A guard answered. "It leads to the mountains, but we'll not get far, the corrupted hordes are too many."

"Take everyone there then, we have nothing else to do!"

"So much death." A ghost mentioned. "What can Terrans do against such reckless micro?"

"Ride out with me. Ride out and meet them." Mike stated.

"For death and glory..." The ghost continued, his spirit rising.

"For Equestria..."

"For ponies and Terrans alike."

"The sun is rising." 'Raud mentioned.

"Yes... Yes..." Celestia muttered. "The horn of Canterlot of Equestria... Will sound in the fields... One last time."

"Yesh!" 'Raud spoke before rushing to the horn of Canterlot.

"Let this be the hour... When we draw guns together." The ghost stated. "Fell deeds, awake..." At this point, the gates were being torn down by the battering ram. "Now for wrath, now for ruin..."

"And a red dawn!" Mike completed.

The horn of Canterlot now sung in the fields, echoing in the castle and everywhere else in Equestria, just as the gates fell down and the grey forces charged through.

"Forth Terrans!!" Mike yelled while drawing his gun. and charing forwards to meet the grey forces, with every terran not dead now following behind him, shooting their way through the gate, and then outside where the corpses of Terrans littered the streets. Well, right until the corpses disappeared to save RAM, that is. Mike and his men, who barely numbered the dozen, broke through the grey tide outside, now meeting thousands upon thousands of the corrupted Terrans, but their morale not faltering at any second. Until, in the horizon, Mike could see a shining figure. Not seconds later, the shining figure was met with strange lights around him and, after they dissipated, more silhouettes showed up.

"I am Executor Kra'Ser, of the templar." Mike could hear in his mind. "The time for introductions is short, and we appear to be fighting against a common foe. I will draw my blades against these foes which you have been fighting against, you will not stand alone in your darkest hour as long as I remain unshattered."

"A... Protoss..." He muttered to himself, right before receiving a shot in the chest but pulling through the pain and keep on fighting.

"Brothers!!" He kept on hearing in his mind, right before seeing in the horizon how hundreds upon hundreds of protoss warriors now backed Kra'Ser up, the grey Terrans now turning to face them. "To Aiur!!"

The entire protoss forces now gave a warcry as they charged downhill to meet the corrupted Terrans. Zealots, Stalkers, Templars, Void Rays and Carriers, and even the mighty Archons joined the charge al the while psionic storms filled the air.

"Ugh..." Mike ranted, sitting against a wall spitting blood while covering his chest wound which bled at an alarming rate.

"Mike...?" Twilight asked with worry, hoping that what she believed what was happening wasn't the truth. "Come on, you survived worse things in your time here, you can't just... Go..."

"The objects of your universe... Of this place..." Mike explained while coughing heavily. "Cannot harm those of mine... Nor can the inverse happen... That's why none of my... 'Plans'... Ended up with pony casualties... But the weapons of my universe... They can harm me, and... Potentially kill me."

"That's... That's a lie!! You can't die!! Not after this!!" Twilight began tearing up with her friends behind her. "We still need you... Discord is still free!"

"Can't ya just... Use that heal bus and heal yaself?" Applejack questioned, trying to come up with a solution to such event.

"Unfortunately... Not... Time's up, I guess... Come on, maybe that fella... What's his name... Kra'Ser can help you lot..."

Kra'Ser, the Templar, had arrived. Slowly, he walked his way towards Mike, with everyone present looking at him with confusion and awe. A Protoss, the one who had led his brethren against the corrupted Terrans and saved Canterlot, yet not enough to save Mike, it would seem. All allowed him to walk unhindered, moving out of his way as he walked up to Mike and stood in front of him. The wounded Terran simply stared back, unable to speak.

Then Kra'Ser kicked him in the head.

"What the hell?! Asshole!!" Mike ranted.

"You still have a few hitpoints remaining, Terran." Kra'Ser retorted.

"...Damn genius..."

"What." Everyone questioned themselves as they saw Mike standing up and just walking outside to be healed by a medivac.

"Another Terran?" Celestia asked Kra'Ser, figuring that those who came from the same universe as Mike were Terrans.

"No, I am a Protoss. A High Templar."

"Then how did you get here?"

"Archon Toilet and a bad connection." The Templar answered.

"That's my boy." Mike cheered as he returned from outside. "Anyways, what about this Discord fella?"

"Oh, right..." Twilight sighed.

"Chaos over here... Chaos over there... Chaos everywhere!" Discord sang of heresy. But not after long, he could feel the earthquake of a thousand steps again. "What--"

"Surprise!!" Mike yelled right before a Protoss Mothership arrived and casted a Vortex spell on Discord, which swallowed him whole. Right after that, dozens of Archons jumped inside while yelling random gibberish as if it was a drunken party. "You know, you didn't have to send in the Archons." He notified Kra'Ser.

"Old habits die hard." Kra'Ser remarked, standing next to Mike as they stared at the spectacle.

"Ponies, are you going to do it or what?" Mike questioned.

"Alright girls, let's do this!" Twilight ordered the rest, who focused their energies on the Elements and shot them high into the sky, now arcing towards the Vortex and landing inside.

"So how long does this thing last?" Mike asked Kra'Ser while looking at his watch. Kra'Ser just shrugged.

Not after long, the Vortex disipated with a great explosion of several heavily saturated colours, shooting the petrified statue of Discord outside and hitting Mike, while a shockwave now returned everything in Ponyville and Equestria to its normal form. It wasn't the only thing either. Rainbow coloured Archons left the Vortex too, apparently affected by the power of the Elements.

"I feel fabulous." A Rainbowrchon stated.

Back in Canterlot, the six ponies and the two outsiders walked a red carpet towards Celestia, with a public watching them. "We are gathered here today to once again honor the heroism of these six friends and two outsiders who stood up to the villain Discord and his magic, and saved Equestria from eternal chaos."

Everyone cheered at their saviors.

Celestia focused her magic to move a curtain and reveal a stained glass. On it, the mane 6 were bringing down Discord, trapped in a circle representing the Vortex. On the left side, Mike and his Terrans and him were placed, and, on the right side, Kra'Ser and his Protoss forces, who were blue.

Several days later.

"--Princess?!" Twilight became surprised once she opened the door of her house to see Celestia standing outside.

"Hello, Twilight. I came here to see how Kra'Ser was doing. How has he... Behaved compared to Mike?"

"Well..." She sighed while turning to Mike and Kra'Ser. Mike was sitting on a couch watching TV while eating a bag of chips, while Kra'Ser was levitating, sitting in the air with his legs crossed reading several books at once. "He became... Addicted to knowledge..."

Chapter 16: Lesson Protos

"I am Executor Kra'Ser, of the templar, as most of you might know already." Kra'Ser presented himself once things calmed down a day later in Twilight's home, with Spike, Twilight and the rest of her friends paying attention. Mike was also listening, but only that, since he was also watching TV laying on a couch. Nobody questioned what was a TV, how it got there, how it received signal, let alone even work seeing as there was no electricity.

"So how did you get here?" Mike asked, changing channels with his remote.

"The last thing I remember is being trapped in a Vortex when I was fighting against another Protoss force. After that, my opponent dropped and I ended up in this weird place. I arrived in a land far away so I decided to find out a way to return. These lands had minerals and geysers, and I started with a Nexus and six probes, so I decided to start preparing. After a bit of scouting I saw your forces fighting against the grey ones."

"Why did you decide to fight against the grey ones and join my side to begin with?"

"They shot me in the face. Luckily my shield protected me."

"You seemed to have arrived right when Discord casted that spell after dodging the first time the ponies attempted to shoot him down with the same thing they threw into your Vortex, according to your words." Mike remarked. "A word of advice, though: You're now stuck in a medieval society succesfully managed by talking pastel coloured mini-horses, some with wings, and others with horns, controlled by other two horses--"

"Ponies..." Twilight interrupted.

"--Ponies with both wings and horns, with the economy being focused mostly on apples. Anything you see is pretty damn common, even... Uhhh... Let me think of an example..."

"A flying reality-warping mashup of animals?" Spike suggested.

"Isn't that Q from Star-Trek?"

"What?"

"Nevermind. Anyways, you heard the mini-dragon, Templar."

"I see..." The Templar nodded while reading a book, completely oblivious of what Mike said.

"Are you even listening to me?!" He questioned while violently turning around.

"--You said something?" The Templar asked.

"AAAAAGH!!!" Mike screamed to the sky while holding his head out of pure rage.

"Ah, I forgot to mention, I hope you're not bothered but I stole a few of your bases to fuel my army."

"YOU SON OF A--"

"Give me a reason not to shoot you and retake this base." Mike asked Kra'Ser, both walking through a Protoss base in the outskirts of Ponyville. From their place they could see probes mining, the Nexus creating more probes, and several gateways turning into Warp gates.

"Because I saved you from the grey ones." Kra'Ser answered without much enthusiasm.

Mike sighed in annoyance. "Fine, fine..."

"I find the lack of a cap for the number of units interesting..."

"That was my reaction at first too. It's kind of a miracle we don't have any Zerg around here."

But suddenly, they could hear a whistle in the sky. They both looked at the source of the noise and spotted it immediately: In the sky, a nuke was spiraling out of control just at their direction. Mike and Kra'Ser stood still for a moment, like a deer about to get hit by a car, but after regaining their senses they began running away while screaming.

Previously...

"I got it..." A ghost whispered to himself while designating a barn with his laser for a nuke to be dropped there. In the distance a nuke being launched from a ghost academy was seen, and was now arcing towards the barn.

"Ghost, stop!!" Twilight yelled all of a sudden, stopping the nuke that was almost on its target with her magic then throwing it away as if it was a crumbled paper ball. "Listen, Ghost. I know you're upset with Applejack, but don't worry. Whatever it is that has come between you two, I'm sure that I, as a good friend, can help you resolve your problems."

"Uhhh..." The Ghost worried, seeing the nuke spiraling out of control after Twilight changed its course and exploding in the distance, probably where one of Kra'Ser's bases was.

Afterly...

"You just nuked one of my bases!!" Kra'Ser argued with Mike while walking through Ponyville.

"Hey, I didn't order a nuke to be dropped there!!"

"Then what just happened?!"

"As if I'd know!! Did you even see a red marker!?"

"...Oh wow, now that you say that..." Kra'Ser realized that there was no red marker in his base before the nuke hit, and there was no 'nuclear launch detected' warning either.

"Outta ma way crackas!!" A marauder yelled right before striking through them like a bowling ball and rushing to the limits of Ponyville. Mike and Kra'Ser were struck to the ground.

"Okay, I didn't order that either..." Mike grunted while standing up. "I'd better check out what's going on. You in?"

"I'll stick around."

"...What?" Kra'Ser questioned himself upon spotting more than a dozen ponies, a marauder, and three marines chasing a doll.

"A doll? Is that some sort of valuable thing around these parts?" Mike asked himself. Then, he narrowed his eyes to see better the doll, trying to figure out what was so special about it. Then it struck him, the spell that it had been enchanted with.

"It's just a doll. I'm heading back to-- ...Mike?" Kra'Ser asked, but Mike had disappeared. Then he realized that Mike had gone to chase the doll too. "What's wrong with these people...?" He asked himself while scratching his head.

Big Mac had the doll, running away but ultimately being caught in a big bad moshpit of ponies who piled up upon him. But on top of the pile, Mike himself came out, holding the door in his hand and a gun on the other, shooting at the ponies while standing on top of the pile. Of course this didn't work at all due to the can't-damage-what's-not-from-your-universe thing.

"Stand back!!" Mike yelled as the ponies climbed towards him.

"Gimme!!" Mayor Mare said while trying to grab the doll from Mike's hands.

"Piss off!" Mike struck her with the back of his gun, sending her back. However, she had successfully grabbed the doll, flying back with her. "Get back here you little son of a--!!" He yelled, jumping from the pile and now beginning chase against Mayor Mare.

"Run like the wind, bullseye!!" Mike yelled while waving his gun in the air and pointing at Mayor Mare, while riding a random pony. However, a peagsus had stolen the doll from Mayor Mare, now flying in the sky and fighting with another pegasus for control of the doll. Mike stood on top of the pony and jumped into the sky, successfully clinging to another pegasus that was flying and taking control of it. Bellerophon would be proud. He gathered speed and struck right between the two fighting pegasus, knocking them away and grabbing the doll. However, more and more ponies began chasing after him.

"Don't look at it!" Twilight rushed to Rainbow Dash and shut her eyes who was looking at Mike and the doll flying around.

"Don't look at what?" Rarity questioned, before her eyes being shut too.

"My Smarty Pants doll! I enchanted her and now everypony is fighting over her!"

"Why would you enchant your doll?" Fluttershy questioned, now with the sky being covered in a gunfight between pegasi and Terran vikings and wraiths, all fighting for control of the doll. Such scenery looked like something out of the Ace Combat series.

"Oh, I had to do something! I had nothing to report to Princess Celestia! I thought if I couldn't find a problem, I'd make a problem! The day is almost over!"

"...Not almost." Applejack stated.

"Fly into the sunset, my loyal steed!!" Mike ordered while standing on the pegasus.

"Twilight Sparkle!" Celestia, who arrived in a blinding light in the sky, said with anger.

"Whoa nelly." Applejack mentioned.

"I CAN'T SEE SHI--" Mike yelled, both him and the pegasus he was riding on being blinded by the light and accidentally striking against it. The pegasus, Mike and Celestia were sent flying.

Mike and the pegasus landed on the ground headfirst, but Celestia was caught by a Protoss Phoenix's graviton beam, leaving her on the ground unharmed.

"So you're 'Celestia'...?" Kra'Ser questioned while walking up to her. Celestia had known about Kra'Ser, but not the other way around. He turned around and walked up to the doll that was lying on the ground, then he picked it up and stared at it, not understanding what was so special about it. It seemed that the Khala made him immune to the enchantment.

Mike stood up and charged against him, only to be hit in the face by a Force Field casted by a Protoss Sentry, who stood near him. He tried running around it, only to be hit in the face with another Force Field. The sentry stood there watching him, as if it was taunting him with its mere presence. Mike tried confusing the sentry by quickly moving one way and the other, trying to make it cast the Force Field again and make it waste its energy. It succeeded, and Mike now ran around the four Force Fields to charge against Kra'Ser, only to be met with yet another one. Two more sentries had appeared and another sentry was warping in thanks to a warp prism deployed to allow the Warp gate in the protoss base to warp in more as needed.

"Thanks, Kra'Ser." Celestia now focused her energy and casted a spell to revert what the doll had done.

Eventually, all who were affected returned to their normal selves, yet holding all memories of what happened.

"Well, that was... Fun..." Mike mentioned, lacking better words for what just happened as he shook his head. Every pony, realizing what happened, walked away, as if silently agreeing never to speak of this again. The Terran forces returned to base, seeing as they were not needed anymore.

"Meet me in the library." Celestia order Twilight before flying away.

"...Goodbye girls." Twilight said, already accepting defeat. "If you care to visit, I'll be in magic kindergarten, back in Canterlot."

"Magic kindergarten?" Fluttershy questioned.

"Canterlot?" Rainbow Dash added.

"Visit?" Mike asked.

"We're never gonna see Twilight again!" Pinkie Pie despaired.

"Uh, What are we gonna do, y'all?" Applejack asked.

"...But...but..." Twilight spoke with Celestia in the library. "I'm supposed to send you a letter about friendship every week. I missed the deadline. I'm a bad student! I'm... tardy!"

"You are a wonderful student, Twilight. I don't have to get a letter every week to know that." Celestia reassured her.

"Really?" She asked in disbelief.

"For the Emperor!!" A voice screamed tremendously loud right before both Terran and Protoss forces broke through the walls, ceiling, and floor into the library and surrounded Celestia. Zealots, Stalkers, Marines, Marauders, Vikings, and even a Fabulous Archon back from the vortex incident with Discord. She was now held at gunpoint, bladepoint, psionicpoint, gatlingunpoint, etc.

"Over my dead hands you're going to take her." Mike stated, his gun pointed at her.

"Do not make a decision you'll regret, 'Princess'." Kra'Ser warned her, ready to cast Feedback on her to prevent her from casting any spell at all.

"I'm listening..." Celestia spoke, retaining her composure and wishing to see how they reacted.

Both Kra'Ser and Mike were speechless. They didn't come up with anything, just the good ol' fashioned 'charge in and hold at whatever-weapon-is-being-used-point until cooperation is achieved'.

"Please, your highness. We all saw that Twilight was upset..." Fluttershy spoke up.

"...but we thought that the thing she was worrying about wasn't worth worrying about." Rainbow Dash added.

"As Twilight's good friends, we should have taken her feelings seriously and been there for her!" Rarity continued.

"Please don't take her away from us just because we were too insensitive to help her." Fluttershy said.

"Anyone knows who nuked my base?" Kra'Ser took the opportunity to ask. Just like Mike several times before, he was ignored.

"Looks like you all learned a pretty valuable lesson today." Celestia spoke. "Very well. I'll forget Twilight's 'punishment' on one condition. From this day forth, I would like you all to report to me your findings on the magic of friendship, when, and only when, you happen to discover them."

"Friendship?" Both Mike and Kra'Ser asked in unison. "Really? What are you, gay?" Fortunately they were ignored. Hell knows what would have happened if Celestia or the others had listened.

"So... What do we do now?" Mike asked, seeing as there were hundreds of Protoss and Terran units cramped in the tiny libreary. Not before long, a barracks crashed into the building, just like in the Ancient Castle in the fight against Nightmare Moon, and started flashing lights characteristic of a Terran building creating units. Not only that, music with heavy bass also blasted. It could be said the barracks was now a makeshift disco ball, or cube in this case.

"Party in the library!!" A voice from inside the barracks yelled.

"Princess Celestia, wait!" Twilight ran up to Celestia in the balcony. "How did you know I was in trouble?"

"Your friend Spike made me aware that you were letting your fears get the best of you. I commend him for taking your feelings seriously." At this point Twilight's friends showed up to see her. It was unknown how the floor supported their weight, seeing as at this point even a feather would cause the entire library to crumble upon itself due to the damage. "And it's not that hard to see a small Terran war in the skies from the castle. Now, if you will all excuse me, I must return to Canterlot. I'm expecting some mail."

"Y'all heard the Princess. Spike, take a letter." Applejack said.

Dear Princess Celestia, we're writin' to you because today we all learned a little somethin' about friendship.

We learned that you should take your friends' worries seriously.

Even if you don't think that she has anything to worry about.

And that you shouldn't let your worries turn a small problem...

...into an enormously huge entire-town-in-total-chaos Princess-has-to-come-and-save-the-day problem.

Of course, the Terrans saved the day this time.

No, the Protoss did.

Terrans!

Protoss!

Mike! Kra'Ser!! Get out of this letter!!

Chapter 17: Psionic Eclipsed

"Star Swirl the Bearded is only the most important conjurer of the pre-classical era." Twilight ranted, dressed in... Something, while walking with Spike behind her redundantly dressed as a dragon. "He created more than 200 spells! He even has a shelf in the Canterlot library of magic named after him. Maybe I should start up a pony group to teach ponies about history. I bet everypony would love it! Don't you, Spike?"

"I'll love it." He spoke with his mouth filled with candy, right before accidentally hitting Twilight who stopped walking and falling to his back.

"Hey look, we're here already!" Twilight stated, now in the middle of the festival. "Should we get something to eat?"

Then spike burped.

"Boo." A ghost covered in a blanket startlet Twilight just as he decloaked. Then a marine with his armor painted as a power ranger thanks to his base red colour, a Marauder dressed in American football gear, and Mike arrived. Mike wasn't dressed, however.

"Well look who's here..." Twilight muttered while regaining her composure. "Wait, where's you costume?"

"Some ponies said my mere presence was scary enough."

"And you took that as a compliment instead of an insult..." She muttered to herself without anyone hearing.

Then, Kra'Ser arrived. He was without costume too, just his High Templar armor, seeing as he received the same 'compliment' as mike from the ponies. With him arrived an Archon dressed as a mobile disco ball, a sentry as a General Lee, and a zealot dressed in a sterotypical disco fashioned, fancy suit and afro included.

"Amusing." Kra'Ser mentioned while looking around, seeing as he never even knew about this kind of festivity.

"Twilight, Twilight! Look at our haul!" Pinkie Pie rushed towards her with a few other fillies, showing all the candy they got. "Can you believe it?!" She now began eating like a chicken. Noise and all. However, she didn't realize Rainbow Dash in a Shadowbolt costume was creeping around with a black cloud. "And then, we went to Cheerilee's house, and got a bunch more goodies. Didn't we, Pip?"

"Sure did!"

"And then, we had to stop and wait for Granny Smith, and-"

Rainbow Dash was ready to strike her cloud and let out a thunderbolt, but Kra'Ser, upon seeing this and wanting a quick laugh, sighed to himself and snapped his fingers. A psionic storm harmlessly engulfed Rainbow Dash, scaring her, Pinkie Pie and the others away. However, Mike's natural reaction to psionic storms and their characteristic noise caused him and the ghost to aim their guns loaded with EMPs at the Templar. Of course, they lowered them afterwards. Kra'Ser laughed to himself.

"That wasn't very nice." Twilight sighed. She'd have told that to Rainbow Dash, but seeing as Kra'Ser was the one who ultimately caused the fright, she directed it at him.

"I know." He said, still calmly laughing to himself.

"Look what you did to Spike."

Spike was chocking himself to death. Then Mike arrived, furiously executed an elbow drop on his stomach, and saved his life by causing the candy to be shot out of his throat.

"Happy Nightmare Night, Applejack!" Twilight greeted Applejack, with the group following her.

"Howdy Spike, hey Twilight! Nice costumes."

The Terrans and the Protoss gave a thumbs up to her in response. Well, at least those who actually had thumbs.

"With that beard, I reckon you're some sorta country music singer." She stated while messing with Twilight's beard.

Twilight sighed, and Spike laughed.

"While y'all here, ya' feel like bobbin' for an apple?" She offered while pointing at a wooden tub filled with green water or whatever it was, with apples floating on it. A pony was about to bite one, only for another pony to come out of the tub with a protoss probe on it's head making its characteristic "I AM IN DANGER" sound.

Then, on another part of the festival, a crowd cheered an applauded at Mayor Mare, who was dressed like a clown. Literally. How they clapped to begin with was uncertain, they didn't even have hands.

"Thank you, everypony, and welcome to the Nightmare Night festival! Now all the little ponies who have been out collecting sweets should follow our friend Zecora to hear the legend of Nightmare Moon!"

The cheering and clapping was now replaced by the loading and cocking of every single Terran's guns. They know what happened with Nightmare Moon.

"Did something happen?" Kra'Ser questioned. He wasn't even in the same plane of existence when the event took place.

Mike sighed, took out a USB pendrive from his pocket, and ramming it against the back of his head. In Kra'Ser's eyes the replay of what happened in that day started playing.

From a green cloud Zecora appeared and stepped forwards. "Follow me and very soon you'll hear the tale of Nightmare Moon." At this point they were near a forest, in front of a statue of Nightmare Moon. "Listen close my little dears, and I'll tell you--"

"Hey you're that one that turned us into infested terrans!!" A random marine stated. Kind of a miracle that the marine was still alive since then.

"...Right. Listen close my little dears, and I'll tell you where you got your fears of Nightmare Night, so dark and scary." She took out a green powder and dispersed it in the sky with her breath, which took the form of Nightmare Moon. "Of Nightmare Moon, who makes you wary." 'Nightmare Moon' now charged towards the group, only to be intercepted by a flying barracks with a truck honk sounding. Of course, since it wasn't a solid creature, the barracks kept its course until it crashlanded on the ground. Not that it wasn't expected anyways.

"Since when did you manage to weaponize a building?" Kra'Ser asked Mike. Mike only shrugged.

"Every year, we put on a disguise, to save ourselves, from her searching eyes."

The terrans aimed their guns at the green dust which hid 'Nightmare Moon', only to be revealed that it was Zecora behind it. Zecora rolled her eyes upon being greeted by dozens of guns and kept on narrating. "But Nightmare Moon wants just one thing. To gobble up ponies in one quick swing. Hungrily, she soars the sky. If she sees nopony, she passes by. So if she comes and all is clear, Equestria is safe another year!"

"Uh, Miss Zecora," Pipsqueak asked, "if we wear costumes to hide from Nightmare Moon, so she won't gobble us up, how come we still need to give her some of our candy?"

"A perfect question, my little friend. For Nightmare Moon you must not offend." At this point, the green dust 'Nightmare Moon' returned, now creeping towards the group. "Fill up her belly with a treat or two, so she won't return to come eat you!" The dust charged towards the group with her mouth wide open and her teeth showing. However, a siege tank arrived rolling full speed and counter-charge Nightmare Moon, using the uneven terrain as a makeshift ramp to send itself slightly above the air. A flying tank. Of course, nothing happened since it was mere dust and the siege tank remained in its place, with Mike opening the hatch and popping out of it.

"So... These things weren't Nightmare Moon?" He asked, dumbfounded.

"No. They were not." Twilight answered, irritated.

Mike sighed and lowered his sight. But following that, the clouds in the skies formed into a spiral with the wind blowing and leaves flying. A strange light illuminated the skies and out of it a chariot appeared, flying down to the ground. Everyone was worried due to this not being expected. Except for Mike, Kra'Ser, and their respective units.

"It's Nightmare Moon! Run!" Pinkie Pie yelled before running away, with the ponies following her.

"Nice effects there." Mike gave a thumbs up from his tank's hatch. "Yo, K, I'm heading back to get some candy, you in?"

"Do I look like I have a mouth to eat candy?"

"No."

"Meh." Kra'Ser shrugged before heading to the tank. Mike closed the hatch after entering, Kra'Ser sat over the tank and the other Terrans and Protoss followed suit before heading off to Ponyville again.

Mike wasn't fazed in the slightest by this, thinking the Nightmare Moon in front of him was just another illusion. Kra'Ser, however, simply didn't understand a single thing that was going on, so he just shrugged it off.

Later on, once Mike in his pimp-tank and his pimp-crew arrived in Ponyville, everyone was already frightened beyond imagination. Even the skies were filled with dark clouds.

"Ponies said my presence was scary... Hell, never thought it'd be true." Mike mentioned while driving the tank around Ponyville, until he stopped near Twilight. Kra'Ser, the terrans and the protoss got down and mike popped out of the hatch. "Did I miss something?" He asked, only for his attention to be set somewhere else in an instant. The figure that appeared not a few minutes ago.

"CITIZENS OF PONYVILLE." Princess Luna, formerly Nightmare Moon, spoke up. Mike, annoyed and still thinking it was a simple illusion, decided to grab a loudspeaker from inside his tank and aim it at her. "WE HAVE GRACED YOUR TINY VILLAGE WITH OUR PRESENCE, SO THAT YOU MIGHT BEHOLD THE REAL PRINCESS OF THE NIGHT!"

"I AM THE NIGHT." Mike yelled, quoting Batman.

Luna was quite confused. "THOU ART QUESTIONING MY CLAIM?"

"STOP TALKING IN YE OLDE ENGLISHE. WHAT ARE YOU, A JESTER?"

Luna narrowed her eyes in both confusion and slight annoyance.

"Mike!" Twilight whispered to him.

"WHAT?" Mike answered with another question, firing his loudspeaker at point blank range.

"She's Princess Luna! Show some respect!!"

"I AIN'T SHOWING NO RESPECT TO SOME BUNCH OF DUST. ITS AN ILLUSION."

"It's not!!"

Luna decided to continue, thinking it was something about Nightmare Moon causing this. "A CREATURE ON NIGHTMARE IS NO LONGER, BUT INSTEAD A PONY WHO DESIRES YOUR LOVE AND ADMIRATION! TOGETHER WE SHALL CHANGE THIS DREADFUL CELEBRATION INTO A BRIGHT AND GLORIOUS FEAST!"

"HOLY HELL A TALKING ILLUSION, BUT SERIOUSLY, WHERE ARE THE GIANT SPEAKERS HIDDEN? IT MUST--zkzkzkkzkzkzkzkzkkkzk--" The loudspeaker malfunctioned. Mike tried fixing it the true Terran way: By shaking it around and smashing it against the top of his tank. It didn't work. Seeing as it was a lost cause, and still thinking Luna was an illusion, he decided to throw his loudspeaker at her to prove everyone that it wasn't real. He threw it and it flew in the air, arcing over the distance until it finally impacted against her horn.

"AUGH!! HOW DARE YOU?!" Luna exclaimed in pain.

Mike had a blank expression in his face, mostly because he was still processing information in his brain, of how it didn't fall through her instead of impacting. Every pony was also petrified at what Mike had done, every pony in the brink of passing out. Twilight too was with shock in her expression. The Terran forces too, they thought the same as Mike. However, the zealot, archon and sentry were just dancing around to the sound of funk. Kra'Ser was trying to figure out what was going on.

"So..." Mike tried asking, coughing. "You are... The real thing?"

"YOU JUST HIT ME WITH A LOUDSPEAKER, FOOL."

"I see..." He stated, still dumbstruck. "I'll take that as a yes, then..."

An awkward silence engulfed Ponyville for what appeared to be ten minutes, nobody moving a single muscle, Luna annoyed, and Mike trying to figure out what to do. Twilight was still shocked at what Mike had done.

"..."

"..."

"..."

"CHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGE!!!!" Mike yelled with the fury of ten thousand supernovas. Contrary to the first battle against Nightmare Moon, not only flying barracks and seas of marines joined Mike's charge against Luna, but the entire Terran arsenal. Every ground vehicle, every infantry, every air vehicle, every flying building, and even a random guy named Tom. Luna, remembering what happened long ago, began running for her life. It could be said that no less than five billion minerals and gas were depleted in a split second creating the army that was now chasing Luna. Even the sound of Metal drowned the thunderous marching of the great army.

"Is this supposed to be normal around here?" Kra'Ser asked Twilight.

He received no reply.

"I don't want to set the world on fire..." Kra'Ser sung to the tune of the song that was playing while flying his Phoenix, with Twilight as his passenger. "I just want to start... A flame in your heart..."

'At least this one doesn't listen to ear-crushing music...' She thought to herself.

Then, he changed the music to a more upbeat type, one that would be close to Mike's taste.

'Why did I even bother...'

"Found her." He stated, looking at the scenery below. There were Terran forces everywhere, millions upon millions, even the earth could be felt shaking from the sky. A red sea of metal and lead. But in the forest, out of sight of anyone on foot and in the skies, he could see Luna walking aimlessly. He began lowering altitude until he finally descended into the forest. Luna was at first startled by Kra'Ser's Phoenix, but realized it wasn't Mike's, nor anything she had seen before. Kra'Ser opened the hatch and both him and Twilight got out, greeting Luna.

"Princess Luna?" Twilight spoke.

"Feels like an earthquake." Kra'Ser stated. Mike's forces were too close for comfort.

"Hi, my name is--"

"Star Swirl the Bearded. Commendable costume! Thou even got the bells right..." She spoke with her loudspeaker-in-throat-mode enabled.

"Thank you, finally! Somepony who gets my costume! Uh, I just came to welcome you to our celebration! My actual name is-"

"Twilight Sparkle." She interrupted. "IT WAS THOU WHO--"

"Keep it down." Kra'Ser pressured her. "You don't want any of Mike's men to hear you, right?"

"...It was thou who unleashed the powers of harmony upon us and took away our dark powers!"

"And that was a good thing, right?" Twilight questioned.

"But of course. We could not be happier. Is that not clear?"

"Well, you kinda sound like you're yelling at me."

"But this is the traditional royal Canterlot voice! It is tradition to speak, using the royal "we", and TO USE THIS MUCH VOLUME WHEN ADDRESSING OUR SUBJECTS!!"

"Hey guys!! I think I found her!!" A random Terran voice could be heard.

"Aaaand they found us." Kra'Ser sighed. "Get in the Phoenix, we're leaving before they get here."

"You know, that might explain why your appearance was met with... mixed results." Twilight kept discussing while getting in the Phoenix with Luna and Kra'Ser before ascending to the skies. "I think if you just changed your approach a bit, you might be met with a warmer reception."

"CHANGE OUR APPROACH?"

"GAAAH" Kra'Ser lost control of his phoenix for a second before regaining it. "DON'T YELL IN MY EAR!!"

"Lower the volume..?" Twilight suggested.

"Ohhh. We have been locked away for a thousand years. We are... not sure we can."

"Kra'Ser, get us to Fluttershy's home."

"You got it." The templar answered.

"What about Mike and the Terrans?" Luna questioned.

"I'll deal with them if things get ugly." Kra'Ser reassured her.

After a visit to Fluttershy and leaving the poort pony traumatized...

"She stole Fluttershy's voice so she can't scream when she GOBBLES HER UP!!!" Pinkie Pie screamed upon seeing Luna with Fluttershy, almost unconscious, in her arms.

"Fantastic." Kra'Ser sighed. "Where to next?"

What Kra'Ser didn't see, however, were three marines right around the corner, having already spotted Luna. They tried to make a run for it, only to be intercepted by a zealot and a stalker. Of course, the marines died once Kra'Ser realized what just happened.

Twilight narrowed her eyes in slight fright by what Kra'Ser's protoss did, but regained her composure afterwards. "Well, everypony else is in Ponyville, so I guess we have to go there. But the Terrans--"

"Purge Ponyville of Terrans, got it." Kra'Ser aknowledged before warping away.

"No, wait!!" Her attempts were futile. He was already gone. "This... Won't be good..."

Afterwards, Luna and Twilight arrived in Ponyville, already expecting the worse to happen. Lo and behold, carcasses of Terran infantry and vehicles, some split in half by the zealots, others full of holes by the stalkers, others incinerated by the archons, colossi and psionic storms, the village was purged of Terrans alright. However, every pony was more frightened by Luna than by the massacre. Kra'Ser was sitting in a campfire next to other two zealots, the three toasting some marshmellows with the campfire being fueled by a dead marine on fire. Of course, once they realized they had no mouths, they reluctantly threw the marshmallows away.

"It is of no use, Twilight Sparkle. They have never liked us and they never shall." Luna sighed.

"My friend Applejack is one of the most likeable ponies around. I'm sure she'll have some ideas."

After a visit to Applejack and an unfortunate incident...

"Nightmare Moon is gobbling Pipsqueak! Everypony run!" Pinkie Pie screamed before running away with the others.

"Someone call Mike!!" A pony yelled.

Lo and behold, four barracks descended from the skies and dug themselves into the ground in ponyville. The fifth one accidentally deepstriking into the town hall.

"Oh boy..." Twilight muttered, knowing what was going to happen.

Right before marines started pumping out mercilessly, the protoss forces successfully destroyed the barracks, but it wasn't over yet, for the main Terran force was arriving, the earth shaking to the point of almost splitting wide open. In the horizon the Red Army could already be seen moving full speed towards them.

Kra'Ser sighed, stood up and began moving to the outskirts of Ponyville in the direction of the tide, with hundreds upon hundreds of protoss forces warping in all over the village. Zealots, Stalkers and Templars, both High ones and Dark ones.

"I'll deal with this. You two just... Go around and do whatever you were going to do." Kra'Ser mentioned with slight boredom.

In the outskirts of ponyville, the two forces met face to face. Millions of Terrans, against hundreds, a thousand at most, of Protoss. The Terrans stopped once they saw the protoss blocking their path, now questioning their presence.

"Kra'Ser, move. I'm here for Nightmare Moon. Oh hey, that rhymes..."

"No."

"THEN PAY WITH YOUR BLOOD, CHAAAAAAARGE!!"

"Short tempered as always." Kra'Ser muttered while slowly shaking his head with his arms crossed. He and the protoss forces calmly, as if ignoring the danger, just moved into position to brace the impact. The million terrans shook the earth, charging full speed towards the protoss, moving closer and closer every second. The Protoss were now in position, just waiting until the impact.

Then, it happened. Just before the Red tide struck against the Blue Protoss, the High Templars created a psionic storm that engulfed great part of their frontal forces. Almost a thousand died that instant, forcing the Terrans to back off their charge and actually think of a plan instead of A-moving their deathball.

"Is this how you always do things here?" Kra'Ser questioned with amusement.

The Terrans moved, allowing their siege tanks to move to the front and enter siege mode. Their artillery shells fell upon the protoss, who advanced forward due to being forced into the engagement. Their immortals led the charge, and upon moving close enough the High Templars and Colossi dealt with the infantry, while the immortals shot the tanks. However, Mike's forces took the opportunity and flanked Kra'Ser's army with their incredible numbers and surrounded them. Vikings moved in to deal with the collossi, shooting down most of them before the stalkers realized that they had to shoot the vikings down. The battle seemed lost for the protoss before a mothership that just entered the fray casted a vortex upon them. The second wave of protoss, freshly warped-in in ponyville, struck the terrans and dug into the vortex as it dissipated, successfully preventing themselves from being surrounded and backing off.

Mike, upon realizing his tremendous mistake, sent ghosts to EMP Kra'Ser's forces while cloaked. The red army distracted Kra'Ser with several flanking maneuvers and other tactics, allowing the cloaked ghosts to move in and EMP every protoss, be it zealot, stalker, immortal and even templars. Now the entire blue army was left without shields nor energy. The ghosts' energy was depleted too, and Kra'Ser knew this.

Kra'Ser sent zealots and stalkers in front to take the blunt of Mike's damage, while backing off his templars and merging them into archons. Seeing as most of Mike's forces were biological, the Archons would deal tremendous damage against them. Mike couldn't do anything to prevent it: The archons finally merged and joined the fray, but the amount of weapons on either side caused no one to push forward nor to fall back. It was a stalemate with reinforcements arriving on both sides preventing attrition from being a deciding factor.

The battle took great part of the night. The land changed control from one side to the other no less than 30 times, such was the ferocity of both sides. Both commanders were impressed by the other's tactical knowledge and unwillingness to give up ground. For nearly two hours was the earth witnessing the bloodshed, until a certain pony walked up to Kra'Ser.

"You need something?" Kra'Ser questioned, still focusing on commanding his forces.

"The problem about Luna was solved." She stated. Kra'Ser turned around and saw Ponyville took part in the festivies with Luna in there. He had been far too busy in the battle the last hours to realize what had happened, like Luna cancelling Nightmare Night after everyone became too afraid of her and everything being fixed afterwards.

"Mike's still going to kill her. Well, as far as 'kill' goes with non-lethality."

"I know. I came up with something already. I need you to find a way to force Mike to be without his forces, alone. I just need him not to be able to fight back, alright?"

"Hmm... Difficult, but possible." He affirmed. Then, he focused on the battle. "YOU SUCK, MIKE!!" He yelled.

The plan worked, he could hear Mike yelling at the top of his lungs charging forwards with his rifle. Kra'Ser purposefully allowed the Terrans to drive a wedge into his forces, and once Mike and the terrans were closed enough, the mothership created a vortex upon him, swallowing whoever was close too, like another hundred terrans. The protoss now pushed forwards and cut the Terrans down with ferocity of psionic storms while the archons cannon-balled their way into the vortex.

After the vortex dissipated, Mike and the other surviving terrans were shot out. Everyone was killed by the archons, except for Mike, who survived, and was now on the ground. Archons who were as tall as buildings were staring at him, until two moved out of the way to reveal Kra'Ser walking with another strange figure. The strange figure moved its head closer and closer, almost contacting with Mike's gasmask.

"Your nightmares will never end..." It said in a low voice, echoing in the village. Mike now had a heart attack and fell unconscious. If not dead.

"That was... Fast." Kra'Ser mentioned.

"Once he wakes up I think we can tell him that Luna is no longer Nightmare Moon. If this doesn't leave him with a trauma, that is." Twilight spoke with amusement.

"Oh most wonderful of nights." Luna stated, knowing that one of her troubles was now potentially gone.

Dear Princess Celestia,

When you first sent me to Ponyville, I didn't know anything about friendship. I met somepony tonight who was having the same problem - your sister, Princess Luna! She taught me that one of the best things you can do with friendship is to give it to others, and help them find it themselves! And I'm happy to report that all of Ponyville has learned that even if somepony seems a little intimidating, even scary, when you offer them your friendship, you'll discover a whole new pony underneath. And even if that intimidating somepony ends up being chased by an intimidating someone all over the place, you can always ask another intimidating someone to keep him at bay. And even if my Star Swirl the Bearded costume didn't go over, this still turned out to be the best Nightmare Night ever!

"So you mean to tell me that Nightmare Moon--" Mike asked, interrupted by Twilight.

"Princess Luna."

"Princess Luna wasn't a danger after all?"

"Nah." Kra'Ser answered.

"Why didn't you just tell me in the beginning?!"

Twilight was speechless, realizing that such a tremendous war could've been avoided by just plainly telling him.

"Where's the fun in that?" Kra'Ser answered again.

Now Twilight sighed in irritation, seeing as the idiots were doubled.

Chapter 18: Mysterious Dark Templar Do Well

A baby stroller charged full speed without a pilot down the road, clearly with instentions of taking flight over the cliff directly on its course. However, Rainbow Dash rushed and stopped the renegade vehicle before it took off, thus saving the baby inside, much to the joy of the crowd that awaited below.

"Oh no! There's something wrong with the baby!" Rainbow Dash exclaimed, worrying those below. "She's not cheering for everypony's favorite hero, Rainbow Dash!" The joy cheered once again.

"Who carves a path on the side of a mountain leading directly to the edge of a cliff?" Kra'Ser questioned.

"They're tactical geniuses, that's why." Mike answered.

Mike, too lazy to even head to the couch, laid on the floor of the library sleeping while Kra'Ser kept reading books while levitating. Then, Twilight and her friends arrived.

"Kra'Ser, we need a favor." Twilight asked.

"And that is...?" He questioned while closing the book in front of him and looking at them with an expression of slight discomfort.

"Well, Rainbow Dash has been acting... Boastful this day with the 'hero' thing. She isn't calming down about it any time soon."

"And you need my help."

"Yes."

"Ask Mike, I'm busy."

"You really want us to ask Mike for help?" Twilight asked, already knowing how Kra'Ser would react.

"Fine, I'm in. What do you need?"

"Instead of telling her to just shut up about it and calm down, just break her willpower slowly and painfully until she finally succumbs. Because that's what friends do... I like this idea." Kra'Ser whispered to himself in Ponyville looking at the sky. In the skies, an observer flew its way monitoring the scenery, until it spotted something.

"Twilight, the observer saw something." Kra'Ser told Twilight through telepathy. "It appears that a cart full of ponies is making its way down the same tremendously stupid path that leads to the cliff edge. I assume you have something prepared already, I'll send a few."

Seconds later, near the cliff edge...

Hidden from sight, the Mysterious Mare Do well arrived, with six Dark Templars warping in thanks to a warp prism.

"Adun toridas." A dark templar greeted while stepping forward up to the Mare. He was the leader of the five. Then, their attention was caught by the sound of the cart driving down full speed on the path, with Rainbow Dash failing to stop it. The Mare and the Dark Templar nodded and rushed forward to the ground near the cliff edge. They braced and took the blunt of the cart's force, and since the templars were invisible to everyone, it seemed like the Mare did all the work. Unfortunately a Templar was sent flying and fell down the cliff to its death. The cliff was obviously overpowered. The rest of the templars and the Mare, however, successfully managed to stop the cart barely on the edge.

"Oh, thank you, Mare Do We– e..." The despaired tourist thanked her, only to be greeted by the sight of the Mare moving away. The templars moved away too, though in a calm fashion due to being permanently invisible.

"I can't believe it. Mare Do Well is stronger than me?" Rainbow Dash ranted. "Well, a hero is more than just muscle, and she's gonna learn that the hard way."

The observer heard everything, in turn giving the info to Kra'Ser, who in turn gave the info to the others. Just as planned.

Following that, the templars aided the Mare with the construction site disaster, then with the dam.

Then, the templars' hardest task would follow.

One dark templar looked around in main road of Ponyville in front of a building, monitoring the scenery. Another templar was clinging to the window of that certain building looking inside, while the third, fourth and fifth one waited next to the building. The templar clinging to the window nodded towards the three below him. Then, the one in the road nodded at them too. No one was watching. At this point, the three Templars rushed to the window and opened it, jumping inside one after the other and scattering around looking for a certain object.

They found it nearly instantly, but that fortune was short-lived, seeing as they heard someone coming from upstairs. If that someone saw the object floating around due to the templars' invisibility, things would get ugly. They decided to leave the object where it was and wait until the pony arrived, did what it had to do, and left. The pony arrived and walked around with a dish with food, until it sat on one of the chairs and began eating. The pony would be there for a pretty long time.

Seeing as there was no other way around, one of the templars maneuvered around the pony and placed himself in front of a wall behind the pony. With a swift movement, he sliced the wall with his warp blade and kicked it, tearing a door-sized hole and making quite a lot of noise. The pony, startled, turned around and saw the giant hole, speechless and in disbelief. The templars, being the tactical masterminds they are, quickly grabbed the object now that they were out of sight, rushed to another wall, and sliced it open and escaped undetected. Now the building was left with two giant holes and a speechless inhabitant.

The five dark templars reunited and opened the package, revealed to be two dozen cupcakes. They had just robbed the sugarcube corner with mixed results, but they were joyful about the end product. Then, an observer arrived and met with them.

"Yes?" One of the dark templars asked while the others enjoyed their reward. Hell knows how, they didn't even have mouths to begin with.

The observer made unintelligible noises.

"Mare is being chased and needs help? By Rainbow Dash? Agh... Alright, we'll depart in a bit, just let us-- Hey, shut up, you don't even fight! Fine, we'll go now!! By the shadows of Shakuras..."

"I got you now...!" Rainbow Dash stated while watching from the roof of a building, staring at the Mysterious Mare Do Well walking around after being chased by her. But something seemed off, for the Mare was walking on her hind legs and her anatomy was uncomfortable to the eye. Rainbow Dash didn't even think about it, she immediately jumped off the roof and tackled the Mare while landing, sending them both rolling a small distance until Rainbow Dash was on top of the Mare. "Alright miss mysterious! Mystery..." She spoke while taking off her mask. "...Solved!! --Wha!!?"

"I am but a phantom..." The Mare spoke in a deep, echoing voice. Rainbow Dash could not see a head, it was empty, as if only the clothes were the ones doing everything. What she didn't realize, however, was that a dark templar was dressed as the Mare. Rainbow Dash jumped back in fright and became petrified, seeing the seemingly headless Mare stand up and walk into an alley. She slowly came to her senses and started following the Mare, only to reach a dead end with clothes on the floor. Thinking it escaped, she turned around, only to be met face-to-face with another Mare Do Well, another Dark Templar in disguise.

"Beer is an illusion..." The 'Mare' stated.

"You idiot, it's supposed to be 'Fear is an illusion'." Another dark templar in disguise stated, peeking from the roof edge above them.

"Are you sure...?" The dark templar in front of Rainbow Dash questioned while taking out a book labeled "SC2 - Dark Templar Quotes" and checking the contents. Rainbow Dash just flew away in fright.

Afterwards, she landed in another part of the seemingly empty village, panting and frightened by the strange events. She could not even mutter anything, the words simply didn't escape her mouth.

"Jakuul enoch..." She could hear a voice speaking, but couldn't find the source of the sound. It was clear that it was somewhere and it was getting closer, until a 'Mare Do Well' came out from the shadows next to a building and stood there, staring at her.

"Nhas berhu uhna'dhar..." She could hear another voice in the opposite direction coming from another 'Mare', revealing itself from the shadows and standing there.

"The darkness writhes..." Now another 'Mare' appeared in the roof. Eventually more followed, around 20 'Mares' scattered around the scenery simply staring at her.

"Wha-eh-du--" She could barely speak. "--Whaduu want frome?!!"

She received no answer.

And just like anyone else, she decided to run for her life. Or fly. At ground level. The templars gave chase, she could not escape permanently for an observer was also folowing her tracks from the skies, she could run, but never hide. Any time she tried hiding, be it in a building, pile of hay, or in plain sight, she was always discovered. Pretty much a cartoon from the 80's kind of chase. And even if she tried barricading herself in a building, the warpblades would cut the walls wide open.

But, as she flew around the village trying to escape, she could see Mike turning around the corner, walking around while drinking a can of Kopru-ColaTM. "Mike!! Mike!!" She called for him with desperation, landing on the ground in front of him and begging while grabbing his knees. Mike, of course, stared not knowing what was going on with an air of boredom. "Th-- THINGS are chasing me!! You need to help me!!"

"What."

Rainbow Dash turned around and Mike raised his sight. In front of them, 20 'Mares' that were dark templars in disguise stood, silently watching them.

"So these things are chasing you...?" Mike asked.

"YES!!"

"And you want me to help you...?"

"YES!!"

"Alright."

But just before Mike could do anything, 18 of the 20 templars backed off, leaving only two in front. The two templars now did a choreographic ritual, both doing exactly the same movements but opposite to eachother, as if they were mirrored images. They moved sideways closer and closer to eachother, their arms arching from opposite to eachother to now pointing at each other, stopping. Now, they moved them outwards again. "Fu..." They both spoke while impacting their index fingers from both their hands against eachother. "...SION!!"

The resulting light from the ritual blinded both Mike and Rainbow Dash. And once they regained sight, they both saw an Archon dressed in the clothes of the Mare Do Well standing tall right in front of them. They both slowly raised their sight until they almost stared right above them. The Archon was that tall.

"Yeah, okay, good luck with that." Mike spoke before walking away, not wanting to be involved. Rainbow Dash fell on her back, petrified, just looking above her at the Archon Do Well. She was speechless and frightened beyond limit.

"Power... Overwhelming..." The Archon stated in a deep voice, echoing in Rainbow Dash's mind. "You all look so different on this side..."

"Alright, stop it." Twilight stated while arriving in a Mare Do Well disguise, but without her mask. "We needed to teach her a lesson, not leave her with a trauma."

"T-Twilight!!?" Rainbow Dash questioned.

"I think they overdid it a bit..." Applejack spoke while arriving, dressed the same as Twilight.

"Applejack?!"

"Can I... Uhhh... Get these things off?" The Archon asked. "These clothes do not stretch after fusion."

"Yeah, sure." Twilight answered.

The clothes on the Archon burned in an instant.

"You all were behind this?" Rainbow Dash questioned with confusion and surprise.

"Yup, we all played Mare Do Well at different times." Twilight answered.

"I stopped the carriage bus with these babies. Bucky McGillicuddy and Kicks McGee." Applejack added. "Of course, the dark templars helped too. They're invisible, mind you."

At this, the remaining eighteen templars gave a thumbs up in unison.

"I saved the construction workers with my Pinkie Sense." Pinkie added. "And the templars."

"And I used my magic to fix the dam." Twilight added.

"Ooh, ooh! And I did the flyby afterwards." Fluttershy added.

"I made the costumes. Fabulous if I do say so myself!" Rarity added. "It's a shame that someone had to burn them..." She spoke irritated, facing the archon. The archon just shrugged as if saying that there was no other way.

"I don't understand. Why? Don't you want me to be a hero?" Rainbow Dash questioned.

"Of course we want you to be a hero." Twilight answered.

"But a real hero doesn't brag." Applejack continued.

"Uh, I guess I did start to brag a little." Rainbow Dash said, much to everyone's annoyance.

"A little?!" Everyone retorted.

A dark templar was already hitting her in the head with a warp scythe, but she didn't even notice. The warp scythe didn't do any damage at all. It was like a toy plastic pickaxe hitting against steel.

"Okay, a lot."

"Celebrating your accomplishments is natural. But.." Twilight spoke.

"...Rubbin' them in everypony's face is not." Applejack continued.

"Yeah, the only thing that should be rubbed in anypony's face is chocolate cake." Pinkie spoke before daydreaming.

"I think we're getting off topic here." Applejack stated.

"What we're trying to say is," Twilight spoke, "it's great to be really good at something, but it's important to act with grace and humility."

"Might above grace!!" Captain Apollo Diomedes yelled while raising his thunder hammer to the sky.

"You're in the wrong fic, man." A templar informed him.

[EndCredits.avi]

Chapter 19: Khala's Warming Eve

"Once upon a time..." Spike related as the curtains of the theater in Canterlot opened, revealing him with a costume not unlike those of the renaissance era of Terra, and with a faux british accent. "...Long before the peaceful rule of Celestia, and before ponies discovered our beautiful land of Equestria, ponies did not know harmony. It was a strange and dark time. A time when ponies were torn apart... By hatred."

The entire crowd gasped.

"I know. Can you believe it? During this frightful age, each of the three tribes, the Pegasi, the unicorns, and the Earth ponies, cared not for what befell the other tribes, but only for their own welfare. In those troubled times, as now, the Pegasi were the stewards of the weather. But, they demanded something in return. Food that could only be grown by the Earth ponies. The unicorns demanded the same, in return for magically bringing forth day and night. And so, mistrust between the tribes festered, until one fateful day, it came to a boil. And what prompted the ponies to clash? 'Twas a mysterious blizzard that overtook the land, and toppled the tribes' precarious peace..."

And thus, the story of the past began, the telling now taking place directly at the time of the events.

"GAAAAAAAAAAH!!" Two male voices could be heard growing louder and louder form above, falling to their demise. They struck against the ground. The great amount of snow cushioned their fall, but at the same time they were buried by it.

"Hey... I'm alive!!" Kra'Ser popped out of the pile of snow, cheering upon inspecting his chest and finding out he had no injueries.

"Freedom!!" Mike cheered, popping out of the snow, thinking they finally managed to get out of Equestria. His joy was short-lived, though. He looked around, only to see a blizzard and nothing else. The storm was so thick that only the blue and grey tint of the atmosphere could be seen, and only the sound of the wind could be heard.

"So much for 'Freedom'." Kra'Ser mentioned, irritated by the situation.

"Where are we?! How did we get here?! Why did we end up here instead of a beach surrounded by hot chicks?!"

Only the sound of the wind answered.

"Can't see shit, captain." Kra'Ser stated upon viewing the area with his HUD. "No minerals, no geysers, nothing."

"What if it's like one of those you-can-only-use-the-heroes kind of missions?"

"Worth a shot. What do we do?"

"Check the mission objectives."

Kra'Ser now tinkered with his HUD to find out what the mission objectives were.

"'Find out what the mission objectives are.' I'll be damned." Kra'Ser stated.

"So... Should we scout?"

"Does it look like we have any other option?"

"Give up?"

"That one is grayed out."

"Damn."

The normally industrious Earth ponies were unable to farm their land. The storyteller Spike continued.

The Earth ponies, just as Spike said, were starving and trying to farm the land which was covered with snow to no avail. What little they grew, died later. The ponies starved, and the winds were strong enough to tear a house down.

"Alright, fantastic, we found something, looks like we're still stuck in Equestria." Mike stated while walking next to Kra'Ser into the Earth pony village, eating from a bucket of Korpulu Fried Chicken through his gasmask. However, the starved ponies took notice of Mike's food, ignoring the fact that alien species, a Terran and a Protoss, walked in front of them. In a frenzy, every Earth pony began chasing Mike for his bucket, making him run off and scream madly.

Kra'Ser sighed while resting his palm on his face in annoyance. "No minerals or geysers all day long, this must be a solo mission. Seems like everyone's starving too. Thank Tassadar hunger and logistics weren't implemented in Starcraft..."

The Earth ponies were freezing. The home of the Pegasi fared no better. The Pegasi were hungry. And the unicorns were freezing and hungry. Even the unicorns' magic was powerless against the storm. Each tribe blamed the others for their suffering, and the angrier everypony grew, the worse the blizzard became.

"Mike." Kra'Ser called for him. Mike arrived with serious injuries and a broken, empty bucket. "Look over there." He ordered as he pointed at a rather big building. Near it, several ponies gathered inside. It wouldn't be an exaggeration if it was said that most if not all ponies around would be there. "What do you think is happening?"

"Well, maybe--"

And so it was decided that a grand summit would be held to figure out a way to cope with the blizzard.

"Thanks, narrator." Mike and Kra'Ser thanked in unison.

Each tribe sent their leaders.

The crowd muttered at eachother in annoyance and anxiousness, but the trumpets inside the building silenced everyone, signalling the arrival of the leaders of each tribe.

Daughter of the unicorn king, Princess Platinum. Ruler of the Pegasi, Commander Hurricane. And lastly... The fanfare of trumpets was replaced by a fanfare of kazoos. ...Leader of the Earth ponies, Chancellor Puddinghead. Perhaps the three tribes could finally settle their differences, and agree on a way to get through this disaster.

The three tribe leaders gathered near a table set in the middle of the room and stared at each other, ready to discuss their current situation.

Then they started throwing random gibberish at eachother like an usual internet argument. However, their gibberish was interrupted by the giant doors breaking open, with the characteristic sound and cold temperature of the blizzard swarming inside. From the blizzard, Mike, who was the one who kicked the door open, stepped inside with his gun ready and Kra'Ser following next to him.

"Alright everyone! I'm hungry, my bucket of ch'k'n was stolen, and my rear is freezing!! Unless you tell me what the hell is going on--" His request ended before it was completed. Before his eyes he could swear he saw Rarity, Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie on a table with the crowd above them in balconies. He strapped his gun to his side and rushed forward, grabbing Rarity by her shoulders and shaking her around. "Rarity!! What's going on?! We suddenly got here Arcturus knows how, then this blizzard, then my bucket, why?! Why?! Is there no God anymore?!"

"Ugh!!" Princess Platinum grunted while shoving him away. "Don't touch me, you filthy casual." She spoke while dusting off her shoulders. "And what are you anyways? A deformed Earth pony?" She questioned, both judging by the fact Mike had no horn nor wings, and purposefully insulting the Earth ponies.

"Mike, we might have a problem." Kra'Ser informed him while checking on his HUD.

"Of course we have a problem!! She called me a casual!!"

"Tsk, no. Apparently my windows clock reverted by... More than a thousand years." He stated. Then, he muttered behind his non-existent teeth to himself. "Fucking windows 98..."

"More than a thousand years!?"

Kra'Ser only shrugged. He was just as confused.

Behind them, the argument between the three leaders raged on, this time with a tremendously overthought conspiracy theory about the Terran and the Protoss being other-worldly agents sent by the other tribe leaders to take them out. Such was the hatred between them that they didn't even decide to stop for a moment and think about who, and most importantly, what Mike and Kra'Ser were.

And the blizzard raged on... So the summit of the tribes did not turn out as well as hoped, and the three leaders returned home to lick their wounds, and basically complain.

"So..." Mike questioned while checking his gun the one and true Terran way, by aiming the barrel right into his eye. "What now?"

"As if I'd know." Kra'Ser sighed.

Both of them were sitting over a fallen tree in front of a bonfire, doing absolutely nothing but waiting and trying to decipher what to do.

"I scouted half the entire map on my own. There's nothing. No enemies nor resources. There isn't even a mission objective nor a timer. There's nothing." Kra'Ser muttered

"This is Hell."

"Wait, I'm seeing movement." The Templar stated while checking his HUD.

"What is it?"

"It's... Rarity... Rainbow Dash and... Pinkie Pie. Twilight, Fluttershy and Applejack follow each one. They're heading outside the village limits. Wait... They're crossing to the parts I didn't scout!!"

"It's happening!" Mike jumped from the log, checked his gun, and ran off with Kra'Ser to catch up.

"According to the minimap, we're entering the unexplored area." Kra'Ser stated. Both him and Mike were walking through a forest covered in snow. "Rarity, Pinkie and Rainbow Dash took different paths but they're bound to meet eachother further ahead if they keep walking their way. If my wild guessing is right, it shouldn't be too far ahead."

"These things creep me out..." Mike said, staring around with his gun ready. He was still with the trauma of what happened in the Everfree forest not long after he arrived into this world.

"Trees? You're scared of... Trees?"

"You don't know, Templar. The trees... They have eyes... They also have mouths, arms, teeth... And a strange aura around them... I went into the Everfree forest with two hundred marines, I got out with five." He failed to notice that a hundred ninety five marines actually got shot by eachother because everyone was firing blindly out of fright in that unfortunate event.

"You need to stop drinking cider."

"You'll see, Templar... You'll see..."

"Listen, first off, those things are in your mind. Second, even if what you said was truth, you and your men are Terrans, whereas I'm a Protoss. You're all clinically insa--"

"We found our new home!" Kra'Ser and Mike heard the voice of three mares behind a wall of trees.

"Seems like we're close." Mike stated.

They both walked further until through the leaves and woods they could see the three tribe leaders arguing.

"Oh boy here we go..." Kra'Ser sighed while rolling his eyes.

"Hey!! What are those things doing here?!" Commander Hurricane questioned loudly while pointing at the commander and the templar. It seems they heard Kra'Ser.

"Don't act foolish, it is clear you sent them against the people of Unicornia!" Princess Platinum accused.

"Unicornia?! This land is Earth!" Cancellor Puddinghead retorted.

"This is a load of UED BS..." Mike whispered to the Templar upon hearing the word 'Earth'.

"I heard that!!" The Chancellor yelled, although not even knowing what UED meant, taking it as an insult.

"I say we fight for the land. May the best pony win!" Commander Hurricane challenged.

Upon hearing this, Mike readied his gun and Kra'Ser activated his psi blade which he installed days ago. Both were expecting an all-out war, seeing as the three tribe leaders had ponies under their command, but the only thing that happened was a snowball flying into Platinum's face.

"Who dares throw a snowball at royalty?!"

"Wait a minute," The Chancellor interrupted, "Where'd all this snow come from anyway?"

"Oh no. Not again." Commander Hurricane lamented.

"It seems that fighting causes the blizzard to get worse." Kra'Ser observed while extending his hand for a snowflake to land.

"If we had our forces, this place would turn into Braxis." Mike stated, already knowing too well that he and the Templar took gratuitous amounts of property damage as the first resort to everything. Then, he saw how the ponies stopped arguing and began looking for something. "They're heading somewhere, we should follow."

And so the paradise that the ponies had found was soon lost, buried beneath a thick blanket of snow, and hard feelings. Instead of beautiful, it was blizzardy. Instead of wonderful, it was wintry! Instead of spectacular, it was snow-tacular! Instead of-

We get it! Get on with it!

Yes, get on with it!

[Multitide]Yes!! Get on with it!!

Everypony was forced to seek shelter. They searched high and low, but the only shelter for miles was a cold and desolate cave. And, of course, the three tribes had to share it, and nopony was too happy about that.

"Mike, I think I understand your situation a bit better now..." Kra'Ser stated nervously, hearing the announcer in his head.

"You'll grow used to it." Mike reassured him.

"Oh boy. Caves." Mike sarcastically cheered, too used to fighting in the Xel'Naga caverns back when he fought for the Dominion. "So, what are we supposed to do now?"

"The mission objectives still show nothing. Maybe something will happen regarding these ponies." Kra'Ser stated.

"Perhaps."

While Mike and Kra'Ser were talking, the servant of each tribe leader began drawing a line on the ground.

"They're marking their territory...?" Mike questioned to himself. "They don't even have any means to defend it."

Then, they began fighting for a rock that was between the borders.

"Hey, Mike, that reminds me of something." Kra'Ser laughed, obviously insulting Mike and the Terrans for fighting for a simple planet in the Koprulu sector.

"Oh shut up." Mike grunted.

The ponies kept fighting while Kra'Ser and Mike stared, sitting in a corner of the cave, admiring the somewhat amusing spectacle. However, not after long, a strange fog began originating at the top of the cave, with the temperature dropping considerably.

"Is that supposed to happen?" Kra'Ser asked while pointing at the cave's ceiling.

The temperature kept dropping tremendously until the walls themselves were slowly covered by a sheet of ice.

"Look, everypony! The entrance!" Clover the Clever spoke up. The entrance was being covered by a sheet of ice until it was completely blocked.

"Great. Now there's no way out! We're trapped!" Commander Hurricane ranted. Mike just sighed and stood up, then began walking to the blocked entrance. Kra'Ser only followed him with his sight, not knowing what he was going to do.

"You two deserve this horrible fate." Princess Platinum said. "You've done nothing but argue and fight with each other!"

"You've been fighting too, your highness."

"Really?" Mike questioned while breaking the sheet of ice blocking the entrance into a thousand pieces by simply flicking his finger at it. "You haven't even tried to get out? I mean, seriously?"

The three tribe leaders just stood there with blank expressions.

"Well, obviously I already knew about this, it was just a matter of time. If it wasn't for Commander Hothead, I'd have saved everyone already." Princess Platinum boasted.

"Well excuse me, Princess!!" Commander Hurricane yelled.

"Oh for the love of..." Mike grunted while slapping his gasmask's forehead. "You know what? I'm out, I'm not gonna stay here and get 'trapped' again by those flying things on top of us."

"Right behind you." Kra'Ser stated while standing up, now following Mike outside.

"...On top of us...?" Clover the Clever questioned while raising her sight. Then, he spotted the things Mike spoke about. "...Windigos!"

"W-windigos??" Smart Cookie and Private Pansy questioned with fright.

Now that the source of the argument was gone somewhat, the three tribe leaders regained their composure somewhat and decided to escape from the cave, with their respective servants following after them.

"My mentor Star Swirl the Bearded taught me about them." Clover the Clever explained Pansy and Cookie while catching up with the rest. "They're winter spirits that feed off fighting and hatred. The more hate the spirit feels, the colder things become."

"So to avoid this blizzard we just need to cooperate?" Mike asked. The pegasi, earth ponies and unicorns had arrived, thinking that this was the promised land.

"Well, yes. As long as there's no hate--"

"See if I care!!" Commander Hurricane continued arguing with Princess Platinum and Chancellor Puddinghead. "I arrived to these lands first, and I claim it!"

"How barbaric." Princess Platinum retorted.

Not after long, the three of them started turning into ice, although they were oblivious to the slow change. Their argument had the higher priority for them.

"I am no thermodynamics professional, but isn't that not supposed to happen?" Mike questioned.

"No, but it seems that it is happening to us too." Kra'Ser stated upon noticing his legs were turning into ice. The same was said about Mike's and the Ponies'.

"Any ideas what to do?" Mike questioned. Every pony was accepting their fate already.

"There is one thing."

"Fuuu..." Mike and Kra'Ser concentrated with their eyes closed, right before opening them and impacting their knuckles against eachother in an arc. "...Sion!!"

A scorching light blinded the ponies, forcing those who were not frozen to cover their eyes with their arms. But, once the ponies could see once again and their eyes adapted, they could see only one humanoid. It wasn't Mike, it wasn't Kra'Ser. It was something else.

"I am... Gestalt." The strange humanoid stated. It had the characteristics of both Protoss and Terran creatures, as if they had fused together.

The windigos began circling with more fury than before, as if the Gestalt contained more hatred than both Mike and Kra'Ser combined. Then, a windigo landed right in front of the Gestalt, both now staring at eachother in silence, in a deadlock. The ponies could do nothing but stare at those two strange beings.

"Come at me, bro." The Gestalt challenged with his arms wide open.

Then he was frozen solid by the windigo in a split second.

"That was anti-climatic..." Clover the Clever sighed, encased in ice up to her neck.

"I guess this is the end." Smart Cookie stated.

"What I want to say..." Private Pansy spoke to Cookie and Clover. "...Is that I don't hate you."

The three began laughing.

"Hi-yo silver!!" An echoing voice was heard by the three, as if two people spoke at the same time. They raised their sight only to see an unbelievable sight: It was the Gestalt, who was riding a windigo in the skies while the other windigos chased.

"What." Clover the Clever questioned dumbfounded. "It... Broke out the ice?!"

In the skies, the air around Gestalt and the windigos distorted as if time and space were sucked into a vacuum. Gestalt was releasing so much hatred shared by Mike and Kra'Ser that the windigos couldn't absorb it faster than it was created.

"Fly like the wind, Bullseye!!" The Gestalt yelled while gripping the windigo's mouth as it desperately tried to regain freedom, only to veer off course and crash-land into the ground leaving a trail of dust behind. The Gestalt managed to blink away like a protoss stalker get on top of another windigo, surprising it and grabbing it by the ears, taking full control.

"What in tarnation..." Smart Cookie muttered.

"Move!! That thing needs our help!!" A pony yelled behind them in the multitude. Clover the Clever and the other two servants tried turning around to see what the commotion was about upon hearing the pony and feeling a hundred hooves running, but it was for naught for the ice covered her up to her neck. However, not after long, two unicorns arrived with hairdryers and began unmelting the ice. It wasn't their magic that made this accomplishable, it was something else.

Once the ice melted, Clover turned around and saw the Earth ponies and unicorns throwing rocks and snowballs at the windigos from the ground with their hooves and makeshift slingshots. There was even a giant slingshot which threw boulders the size of a car. The pegasi helped too, circling the skies and harassing the windigos with their flight, causing them to dodge them and become unfocused, thus making them easier targets.

Anyone would say that this hatred from the Gestalt and the ponies would have fueled the windigos enough to cause a perpetual ice age, but not this kind of hatred. The hatred that caused the blizzard was fueled by the tribes having a grudge against eachother and not caring at all; but this one was a hatred against those who threatened their fellow kin. It was so great that the tribes who once were separated united against a common foe. This wasn't the kind of hatred which the windigos could use.

"Thing looks like the battle of Midway!!" The Gestalt yelled while standing over a windigo as if he was surfing the air while shooting another one with Mike's gun. "Wooah!" He exclaimed while narrowly dodging a windigo, taking the opportunity to cling onto it by stabbing it with his psi blade while shooting an EMP round at the one he left. It seemed like the Gestalt had most abilities from the Terran and Protoss arsenals.

Eventually, the windigos became weaker and weaker until one by one they disappeared, with the climate reflecting the change by becoming warmer and warmer.

"This is the last one?" The Gestalt questioned while wrestling a windigo in mid-air. "Alright, fantastic!!" He then proceeded to stab it with his psi blade, causing it to combust into cold air. He fell through the skies towards the ground, purposefully diving to gain speed, but before he impacted, he blinked onto the ground causing the speed to decrease. He landed without injury, met by the cheer of every pony around. "Thanks." He spoke with his arm high while trying to regain his balance, boasting. "Thanks everyone. I give air-wrestling classes on Tuesdays."

The blinding light from before soon followed, with Mike and Kra'Ser now standing where Gestalt stood seconds ago.

"I know what to do now!" Kra'Ser spoke up in front of every pony around. "All we need is cooperation, right? Unite the ponies with the Khala! And it shall lead us forth into a new age of blind faith and unreasonable HATRED!!"

"Yeah!! Hatred!! Huzzah!!" Every pony cheered.

Then, a giant snowball fell on top of Kra'Ser.

"Okay, maybe not." Mike observed.

All through the night that followed, the Protoss, the Terran, and every pony around kept the fire of hatred for the sake of friendship alive by telling stories to one another, singing songs and celebrating in their newfound home, which of course became the winter carols that we all still sing today. Eventually, the warmth of the fire and singing and laughing reached the leaders who were left frozen for more time once the ponies realized that it was pretty much because of them that everything happened, and their bodies began to thaw. And, it even began to melt their hearts, fortunately.

The three leaders agreed to share the beautiful land, and live in harmony ever afterwards. And as a token of eternal gratitude, they also allowed the Terran and the Protoss to name their land. This land was thus named...

"New Korhal!" Mike boasted in front of the dominion flag he planted.

"Hey, it'll be New Aiur!!" Kra'Ser retorted, with a flag of the Daelaam.

"New Korhal!"

"New Aiur!"

"Why not... Equestria?" A random pony suggested while drawing a design for a flag on the dirt.

"Yeah sure."

"Fine by me."

"Wait, what?!" Spike realized what he had been saying. The public was speechless and the mane 6 dumbfounded. Twilight even ran off to her library and came back with a book titled 'The Founding of Equestria' and slammed it open on the ground, with every pony arriving to check what was going on.

"Okay, let's see... Founding... Founding... Founding..." Twilight spoke to herself while desperately turning pages. Every pony was gathered around the book waiting for answers. "Aha! Found it! 'The two outsiders who named themselves Mike and Kra'ser arrived from an unknown land, but they decided to help the ponies without even asking for a reward. After the founding of Equestria, they misteriously disappeared, never to be seen again. It is not clear whether their legacy will live on or not, but what they've done deserves the best of us and more.' ...What in the name of...?!" She spoke up, completely confused. Then, she ran off to the hallway of the castle while leaving her book for everyone to inspect.

Once she arrived, she looked around the stained glasses until the found the one she had been looking for. Her confusion increased tenfold once she spotted Mike, Kra'Ser, and their fused form 'Gestalt' engraved in it with the ponies of the three tribes.

Then she heard two screams from the skies coming closer and closer. She noticed it, but her confusion didn't even allow her to breathe correctly, let alone look around to see what it was. Both Mike and Kra'Ser fell through the castle roof where the glass was, breaking through it and landing behind her, unconscious.

"I..." Twilight muttered. "I-I don't... I can't... What..."

Chapter 20: The Super etc 6K

This chapter has been cancelled. The Apple family had so much manpower thanks to Mike and the Terrans that the Flim Flam Bruvvas saw no business opportunity due to no cider shortage. We'll now continue on to the next episode.

...

Just kidding, can you imagine?

"This one's set!" One marauder stated to the other after dumping a bucket of grenades into an apple tree.

"You sure this is how it's supposed to go?" A marine asked.

Another marauder, standinding a considerable distance away, began trying to activate the detonator of the grenades from a distance, though having a bit of difficulty in that, all the while the rest moved away from the grenade-stuffed tree.

"You should probably give that to someone who has all five fingers." A ghost suggested.

"Yeah I got all five fingers!!" The marauder retorted. "Two on this hand, three on the other!!"

After much effort, the marauder succeeded in pressing the detonator. The trunk of the tree was destroyed by the explosion causing the top to fall down to the ground, with the apples scattered around falling into tactically placed wooden buckets all over the place. Surprisingly enough, there were no casualties.

The buckets filled with apples were taken by a group of marines and placed on top of a tank, which doubled as a transport of sorts. After being fully loaded, the tank drove towards the place where cider was brewed.

"Sorry everypony, that's it for today." Applejack announced onced the cider ran out.

Every pony became disappointed.

"Surprise surprise... You ran out again!!" Rainbow Dash retorted.

"Yeah, you always run out!" Another pony added.

"For the record, I don't mind--" Fluttershy tried talking before being interrupted by Rainbow Dash speaking up again.

"Why can't you make cider for all of us? Or at least for me! You give those Terrans most of the cider before anyone can even buy anything!" Rainbow Dash complained while pointing at the Terrans who were drinking around from a few barrels.

"How about you climb this tree, I'll fight you faggot!" Mike, who was on top of a tree drinking, yelled at Rainbow Dash with his arms extended. Obviously he was half drunk.

Every pony began complaining.

"Hold up everypony." Applejack tried calming everyone down. "We're not 'giving away' the cider to the Terrans, they work for us and it's their payment. And we've done our best to improve supply this year--"

"You always say that!!" A pony retorted.

"And it's always true. But Apple family cide--"

"MAYDAY--" Mike screamed as he fell down his tree. The painful 'thud' as he impacted against the ground could be very well heard, followed by the metallic and plastic parts of his suit clashing together as he tried moving. "Medic..."

"You okay?" Kra'Ser asked, walking up to him.

"I need... Another drink... And a 1v1..."

"Yeah, you're okay..." He sighed.

Immediately thereafter, everyone turned their heads at the sound of a vehicle closing in. The sound was characteristic of an engine, a mechanical invention unlike most 'vehicles' in ponyville which were powered by the citizens themselves.

"Another one of your inventions, Mike?" Twilight asked, slightly annoyed.

"Shaddap." He retorted, trying his best to stand up despite the drunkenness making him lose balance.

After the strange machine arrived, stopping in front of the general public, two ponies jumped out. They looked around for a while with expression of mixed disappointment and opportunity, until one turned to the other and began singing.

"Well, looky what we got here, brother of mine, it's the same in every town

Ponies with thirsty throats, dry tongues, and not a drop of cider to be found--"

"Oi, shaddap before I make ya'..." Mike spoke drunk while walking up to them. "S'all da same with ye guys... Singin' heer, singin' therr..."

"Uhhh.."

"I saed shaddap! Ye gitz wit yer big choppa and fancy auto-tune stuhff be notin to meh... Ur 1 cheeky kunt m8 ah swear am gon 2 wreck ya ah swear on my mums life--"

Kra'Ser intervened, knocking Mike out with a solid punch to the jaw to stop him from embarrassing both himself and everyone around.

"Ugh... What just happn'd..." Mike asked, waking up with a tremendous headache. He was on the sofa of Twilight's home.

"You fell off a tree." Kra'Ser explained. "You lost consciousness at that moment, I decided to bring you here--"

Bang. With a quick draw, Mike shot Kra'Ser right between the eyes with his revolver.

"I am very well aware that you punched me in the face, templar."

Kra'Ser had 'died', though it was just a teleportation mechanism built into his armor which teleported him away to safety whenever he was near death. He ended up teleporting to another place of Twilight's home, more specifically the very same spot he was on a second ago.

"Now then." Mike spoke while waving his revolver around to clear the smoke of the shot. "What happened while I was 'asleep'?"

"The visitors, the Flim Flam Brothers they call themselves, they arrived and wanted to set up a bussiness here with Apple family's partnership. However they'd divide the profits in a way that'd end up sending the Apple family to bankruptcy in winter. The Apple family kicked them out but they said they'd return."

"Capitalists." He sighed, thinking nothing of it and returning to his sleep. Then, his eyes shot open upon realizing a tremendous detail that'd mean something horrifying for him and his Terrans.

The next day...

The super etc 6k machine stood on one side of the field while the Apple family stood on the other side, ready for the competition to begin. The ponies of Ponyville arrived to see the competition, seeing as the outcome would also affect them. Mayor Mare stood between two oppositors with an hourglass.

"Is it always this lively around here?" Kra'Ser asked a random pony, who only shrugged. "Normally in Terran grounds each side would bombard the other with lawsuits. Speaking about Terrans, where could Mike be...?"

"The teams have one hour to produce as much cider as they can," Mayor Mare announced with a megaphone. "After which the barrels will be counted, and the winner will be named the sole cider provider for all of Ponyville!"

"This might actually be good news for that drunkard." Kra'Ser thought to himself. "If they make more than the Apple family..."

"Are both teams ready?" Mayor Mare asked.

"Ready." Applejack answered.

"Ready." The Flim Flam brothers acknowledged in unison.

"Then let's... go!"

The Templar took out a cellphone and began calling Mike. "Hey Mike, the competition began, where are you? You might want to see this."

On the other side of the call, the Templar could hear the gibberish of an entire army, as if they were doing something with almost no organization whatsoever. He could also hear some sort of liquid splashing around.

"I'm a little busy at the moment!!" Mike yelled. "Wait-- The competition began??! I'll be there ASAP!! Hey-- Watch out with that thing-- NO DON'T--" The communication was cut.

"What is he doing now...?"

The situation seemed dire for the Apple family. Even at top speed they could only brew one barrel of Cider for every three barrels the Bruvvas brewed. If things kept up like that, they'd end up defeated. But then, Twilight had an idea.

"Um, Miss Mayor!" Twilight caught her attention while walking up to her. "Are honorary family members allowed to help in the competition?"

"Well, I'm not sure... Flim, Flam, would you object to honorary family members helping?"

"Are you kidding?" Flim questioned.

"We don't care if the whole kingdom of Canterlot helps." Flam added. "It's a lost cause."

"Hm, I guess it's okay." Miss Mayor stated. "Applejack? What do you think?"

"I think I'd love to have the rest of my family helpin' out."

And before the rest of Applejack's friends could cheer, as if it was a God-given order, in the horizon could be seen a giant dust wave making its way towards them, just like a stampede, and as it got closer and closer, every single pony in Ponyville could hear the sound of Banjos and country music.

"Mike, is that you?!" Kra'Ser yelled through his cellphone.

"I AIN'T LATE FOR NO PARTY, CHUM." Mike yelled back, with the yelling of the most redneck rednecks in the Terran forces accompanying him. Even their rides were redneck. They drove in pick-up trucks and DIY vehicles they made themselves out of cardboard and ammunition.

Once they arrived, the dust wave forced everyone to cover their eyes with their arms; some got dust in their eyes, other began coughing violently, some even both. But once it dissipated, Mike was already next to Applejack, with his forces near the Apple family. The force wasn't painted red like the usual Dominion colour, but instead they were all painted orange with crudely drawn apple-related insignias on their shoulders.

"We're... Uhh... Applejack's cousins!! We're here to help 'er!" Mike stated in front of everyone.

"What." Applejack questioned, dumbfounded.

"Really?" Flim questioned.

"You're not even ponies." Flam added.

"What are you talking about? Of course we're ponies. We're Applejack's... Long relatives! We're orange! And we have Apple stuff as our cut-farts!"

"You mean... Cutie-Marks?"

"...Yes."

"And what about that one?" Flim questioned while pointing at a marauder. "He has a pear for a cutie mark."

Mike instantly began sweating like a hippo once his plan was in danger. "He's... Adopted."

"Ah, I see. Well... Sure, you can help her."

"Good."

"Mike, what the hell are you doing?" Kra'Ser questioned, walking up to him.

"Securing my interests."

"Really?!"

Mike suddenly grabbed him by the shoulders, shaking him. "Listen, Templar." He spoke nervously. "If the Flim and Flam bruvvas win, that'd mean we'd lose our jobs with the Apple family. If we lose our jobs, we won't get paid. What do we get paid with? Free. Cider. If they win there'll probably be more cider, but do you really expect me to pay for something?!"

"Fine! I got the point!" Kra'Ser stated while shoving him away and holding his own head.

"Splendid." He said while turning around while his hands on his hips. "Now then... What are we supposed to do again?"

"You don't know what to do?!" Applejack yelled.

"You really expected them to know what to do?" Twilight questioned.

"Sorry, kinda nervous here. Anyways, get the apples, mash 'em until they're liquid, pour 'em in a barrel. I guess that's that. Make sure the apples are good too."

"Got it." Mike spoke while turning to his marines. "There is no time to be lost. Battle Bruvvas! Spess Mehreens, today, the enemy is at... That other side of the field. We know our duty and we'll do it! We fight for our cider as Terrans, as Spess Mehreens, and we fight in the name of the Emprah!" He threw his fist to the sky just as he finished. At this point, the orange forces cheered, shot their guns at the sky, and catapulted a pick-up truck somewhere just because they could, right before scrambling to the forest like an ant nest once a kid appeared with a magnifying glass at midday.

"I don't know what they'll do..." Kra'Ser spoke next to Twilight, referring to Mike's army and the Terrans in the Koprulu Sector in general. "But, by God, they frighten me."

As the competition progressed, the Terrans simply tore the trees appart by sheer brutality and speed of their actions. Afterwards, they threw the apples into a viking's empty rocket pod, who flew away and threw the apples into a giant steel contained that would be five houses wide. Once it was filled to the point of spilling, two thors were dropped with medivacs. After the landing, they began dancing tango with each other, mashing the apples in the process. The resulting product was filtered with a tiny faucet and poured into several barrels at once.

The Flim Flam brothers were struck speechless by the sheer 'creativity' of the Terrans actually being somewhat useful and productive. Slowly and steadily, the barrel count was rising for both sides, but with the Apple 'family' catching up.

Flim, shocked, spat the cider he was drinking at Flam's face. "Come on, brother, we've gotta pick up the pace!"

"Right, uh, double the power!"

The machine sped up, but after a quick calculation, Flim realize it was just not enough.

"We gotta try something else!"

"I've got it, brother of mine."

Now the machine decided to ignore the bad apples and pass them, brewing them. The quantity of barrels skyrocketed, but with an unknown price behind it.

"Well done, Flam! We're at top productivity!"

"Well, I guess you guys don't have anything under your sleeves." Kra'Ser mentioned while walking up to Mike.

"A wise man once said, 'Science isn't about why, it's about why not'. That is my doctrine for life. And I'm going to throw science at the wall to see what sticks now."

"Time's almost up. What are you going to do?"

"Stimpacks."

"Oh boy here we go..."

"You heard me!!" Mike yelled at his forces. "Use your stimpacks!!"

"Aye aye cap'n." The forces acknowledged in unison. Each one of them took out a syringe from their containers and injected themselves with it. The Stimpack, which would increase the energy of anyone who used it.

The effects of it were immediate and devastating to say the least. Instead of ripping appart the trees, they strip-mined the entire area of anything solid, up until the point where they dug so deep in merely seconds that magma started flowing. They even accidentally dug deep enough to break the time-space continuum and enter an ASCII world called 'Dwarf Fortress'.

Instead of simply throwing the apples into the giant container, they had to load the siege tanks in them and shoot them into the container. There were simply too many apples to throw at once, so they relied on the fact that the apples would impact against eachother in midair and become smashed. The fact that some apples would miss entirely and hit someone unfortunate enough to be on the receiving end was ignored.

And instead of two thors dancing tango, there were 10 thors in an overclocked moshpit mashing so many apples the container broke by sheer pressure. The tidal wave of cider razed the fields until it was stopped by the unicorns' magic. Famine was non-existant and eventually the Alcoholics Anonymous' members triplicated once reports of 'A giant ocean of alocohol' were received. All in all, a simple Tuesday.

Eventually, the Terrans managed to construct a 1:1 replica of the Terratron with so many barrels they made.

"Time's up!" Miss Mayor announced.

Every single Terran and Apple family member fell down to the ground in exhaustion, some with HP in the negatives due to so much liberal use of stimpacks, cheering with eachother as their pile of Cider barrels defeated the Flim Flam Brothers' pile by almost triple the quantity. After a while, once the tidal wave monster of Cider was tamed, Miss Mayor decided to count the barrels.

"Flim and Flam win!"

"Didn't see that one coming." The Templar stated.

"What?!" The mane 6 exclaimed in unison. Upon looking at their pile of Cider barrels, they saw how a multitude of Terrans were drinking a barrel each. The remaining pile ended up consisting of ten barrels less than Flim and Flam's. "Oh come on!!"

Mike, however, was unfazed. He walked with a barrel up to Kra'Ser and simply watched things unfold.

"You seem pretty calm about this." The Templar questioned. "I thought you didn't want to lose."

"We lost?" He questioned, slightly surprised.

"Yes, don't you realize already?"

"Dayum shame."

The Flim Flam brothers finished taunting the Apple family by this point. The Apple family walked away while the Brothers set up their stand, now selling their freshly-brewed Cider. What they didn't foresee, however, was the disgust of their new costumers once they spat their cider on their faces.

"I can't get the taste off my tongue!"

"Mine's got rocks in it."

"I wouldn't pay one cent for this dreck!"

"Amusing." Mike spoke while drinking, listening to the complaints and the bargaining, up until the Brothers were forced to withdraw their bussiness plan. They got on top of their Super etc 6k and left immediately for another city.

"If this was your plan, I am surprised. If this wasn't your plan, I am surprised too." Kra'Ser stated, looking at the ponies now grabbing a tankard of cider.

"I am a cider drinker... I drinks it all of the day..." Mike began singing, half drunk.

Dear Princess Celestia. I wanted to share my thoughts with you. Ahem...I didn't learn anythin'! Ha! I was right all along! If you take your time to do things the right way, your work will speak for itself. Sure I could tell you I learned something about how my friends are always there to help me, and I can count on them no matter what, but truth is, I knew that already too.

"Come on everyone! Get up 'ere then!!" Mike yelled completely drunk while climbing a table. Every pony in Ponyville was celebrating around, drinking cider to their delight.

"I am a cider drinker!!" Everyone joined Mike singing, even the drunk Kra'Ser who was playing the accordion, God knows how he got one. Probably from Pinkie Pie. "I drinks it all of the day!! I am a cider drinker!! It soothes all me troubles away!! Oh arr oh arr aay, Oh arr oh arr aay!! Oh arr oh arr aay, Oh arr oh arr aay!!"

"Let cider be the spice of life!"

Chapter 21: Hell, it's about time

It was the morning of another day in Equestria. Specifically, Ponyville. More specifically, Twilight's house. Even more specifically, the second floor. Or first one, depending on what a person calls that floor that goes above ground level.

It was clear that it was the second floor, for the ground level floor was also named floor, thus, counting as the first one.

Kra'Ser, levitating over that floor that goes above ground level, was reading a book he had found in a bookcase. Namely, the History of Equestria.

Or the history he and Mike had not accidentally rewritten.

Too much.

"So a thousand years ago..." Kra'Ser whispered to himself as he read. "Celestia controlled the sun while Luna controlled the moon. After that 'Nightmare Moon' incident, she controlled both of them. What kind of power is required to do such feat every day and night? Hey, Mike."

"Hm?" Mike questioned, lying over a hammock he had set up himself.

"Did Nightmare Moon really cast a psionic storm after you arrived to this world?"

"Pfft! Psionic storm... That was more like static electricity."

Kra'Ser merely scratched his head while looking at the book, unsure of Mike's reliability regarding storytelling. For all he knew, it could have been a storm as great as the one that took place in the Discord in Aiur.

No, not Discord. The Discord.

His confusion, however, was distracted by Twilight stressing out over something. Kra'Ser dismissed it as her obsession with checklists, further proven true by Twilight having been writing on paper with a levitated quill since hours ago non-stop.

Levitation. That's what gained Kra'Ser's attention.

He thought that if she could do that, so could he. The problem was that he had no idea of how to learn such techniques.

That is, until he realized he was levitating, now looking at the space between him and the ground, empty.

He raised his head from looking at the ground and closed his eyes, trying to focus on how to channel his energy from levitation to be used as telekinesis. He extended his hand to his book, using it as test subject to his goals.

After a few seconds, he had succeeded in learning such power and using it.

"Hey, what are you- Hey, hey! Put me down dammi- Kra'Ser, you god damn ignoramus! Stop daydreaming and-"

At that moment, Kra'Ser lost focus due to Mike's sudden words. His telekinesis had gone too.

And with that, Mike fell to the ground from the heigh of almost reaching the ceiling, yelling all the way down while Kra'Ser simply watched.

His weight, added with his armor and rifle, and with the weak architecture of ponies compared to Terrans or even Protoss, caused him to simply break through the wooden floor and fall to the one below.

The ground floor.

The first floor.

The floor that was below the second floor.

Kra'Ser tilted his head aside, sure that he needed to bring him back or risk being assaulted with a neverending barrage of Terran greetings that generally finished with 'You'. He concentrated again and managed to get hold of Mike with his telekinesis, raising him to the floor that was above the first floor. What he misjudged, however, was in what specific way he had to lift him in order to pull him through the hole on the floor. His mistake had caused Mike to slow and painfully cause another hole, this time from below.

Mike was already losing consciousness.

The templar moved him in the air above a spot where the floor remained intact and let go of him.

His weight caused him to fall through the floor once more.

"You need to lose some weight." Kra'Ser stated, looming over the hole to see Mike on the ground.

"Don't tell me what to do, you god damn oversized rotten squid on shrooms."

Kra'Ser laughed to himself. Mike's anger and suffering amused him quite a bit.

His amusement changed to confusion once he felt the air surrounding him become stranger and creepier. He could feel the presence of a foreign power making its way into the dimension.

Suddenly, a pony that looked uncannily similar to Twilight save for a ragged outfit, eyepatch, messy hair and a scar appeared past a blinding light, engulfed in electricity. Rapidly, she made her way towards Twilight, who began talking gibberish at her.

"The annoyance has been doubled." Kra'Ser sighed, rolling his eyes and returning to his book. This time, he made it float with his telekinesis, allowing him to rest his arms over his crossed legs.

"...The time spells are in the Canterlot archives." Kra'Ser heard, coming from the one that looked like Twilight. It was clear it was the future version of Twilight.

"Can you elaborate further on that?" He asked, turning around.

"I know what you're thinking, Kra'Ser. No." Both Twilight and Future-Twilight stated in perfect synchronization."

"Damned ponies." He muttered to himself, returning to his book."

At the same time, Mike arrived through the staircase.

"The hell's your problem?!" He yelled at Kra'Ser.

He was amused once more.

"You wanna have a go?!" Mike challenged him, readying his rifle.

Before any of them could do anything, they saw sparks in the air, all of which emanated from Future-Twilight, who shut Twilight up and started desperately talking to her.

Before she could finished, a blinding light engulfed her, and as if it was an act of physics, both Mike and Kra'Ser began to be pulled into it, all screaming due to the sudden fright of the situation.

Mike had fallen first, having nothing to cling to.

Kra'Ser fell second, clinging to a bookcase but the force being too strong for him. He had fallen into the light while holding an entire bookcase, disappearing with him.

As soon as they got sucked in, they were shot out. Mike and Kra'Ser, who fell to the ground.

Mike had struck the ground with enough force to send him rolled to a hole he had made, ending up like a golf ball.

Kra'Ser, however, recovered his balance and levitated before striking the ground.

"Wild ride..." Kra'Ser said, scratching his head in slight confusion.

"What year is it?!" Mike yelled from down below, his voice muffled by the floor between him and the rest.

Twilight was confused at what just happened, but decided that there were more pressing matters, such as what her future self had told her. She shook her head and tried to keep her focus on what she viewed as priority.

A few minutes later, Kra'Ser and Mike practiced a simple game of ping pong with a fragment of a broken wing of a viking laid on the ground. It was as big as a normal ping pong table, but having no net due to limitations in their creativity.

"We're in the past, then." Mike remarked. "What do we do?"

"Didn't you say that already?"

"No. It seems reality had frozen and got us to this point after Twilight shook her head and left. I dunno, laws of this reality. I can't even remember where I got this viking wing."

"True. I guess we'll have to wait until things unfold on their own. It'll probably take a few days for everything to be done so might as well entertain ourselves."

"Actually, it'll take less than thirty minutes."

"Why?"

"As we speak, Twilight and the rest are doing what they are doing around ponyville. As they finish, reality reshapes itself and fades and fast-forwards in an instant to the next thing they do. All while a tune plays in the background."

"Are you serious?"

Mike grabbed the ping pong ball with his hand, thereby stopping the game itself.

"You'll get used to it." Mike reassured him. "Say, where did you get a ping pong ball?"

"Look closer."

Turns out it was a miniature probe, making its characteristic greeting sound once Mike noticed.

"I've been experimenting with the vortex." Kra'Ser explained. "Something went wrong, that happened."

"Huh..."

"If what you said is true, the cerberus will make it's appearance soon. What will be done about it?"

[MUFFLED SOUND OF GUNSHOTS AND EXPLOSIONS IN THE DISTANCE]

"You do realize we can not kill anything that is not from our universe, right?" The templar questioned.

"It'll drown in all the corpses."

"Corpses and blood disappear after a few seconds."

"Well it has to get tired some day!!" Mike yelled, throwing the miniprobe upwards and hitting it with his paddle. Unfortunately, it was hard enough to actually destroy the miniprobe, scattering its debris over the viking's wing.

At a moment's notice, reality had shifted. Now it was afternoon. It was sudden enough for Kra'Ser and Mike to notice and look at the sky.

"The cerberus issue only lasted a minute last time. Guess it's the same as now."

"If this continues, it will be only six minutes until reality shifts to night. And you destroyed the probe, you bastard. What do we do now?"

"Oh, I have a plan."

Immediately, a widow mine unburrowed right next to Mike.

"Since when was that thing there, and what is that?"

"I have absolutely no idea. One day appeared out of the blue as a factory blueprint so I decided to try it out. It's a mine, judging by its name."

After finishing his explanation, he decided to try to lift it.

It was as big as him.

"That thing is as big as you. You're not thinking of using it as a ping pong ball, right?"

"Ugh." Mike grunted, dropping the widow mine. As soon as it impacted the ground, it burrowed again. "Have a better idea?"

"Wouldn't be hard to come up with something that won't get us killed instantly."

"No worries, as long as we have hitpoints remaining we're fine."

"That thing has more damage than either of our hitpoints."

"And how do you know, squid-head?"

"Check its stats, you damn meat-bag."

Mike, annoyed, kicked the widow mine who stuck out of the ground like a sore thumb but was seemingly invisible for everyone but him and his forces. After the clank of his boot meeting its top, it turned red and gave a loud beep, while at the same time a green halo appearing around it for Mike alone.

"...Oh wow, you're right." Mike stated.

Suddenly, it was night.

"Guess it's time." Kra'Ser remarked.

"Hah, shame you're not a dark templar, templar!" Mike stated while smashing his chest with his fist, starting up his cloaking field.

"You're wasting your energy, you know." Kra'Ser muttered, rolling his eyes and levitating to where he was supposed to go with Mike.

Reality once more shifted and fast-forward'd, fading to the scenery of inside canterlot. In there, Mike and Kra'Ser arrived in different ways.

Kra'Ser simply walked in. Or floated in. He was allowed to do so unhindered by the guards.

Mike, on the other hand, tore a hole in the ceiling and jumped down.The debris of the ceiling followed him down.

"Why didn't you-" Kra'Ser attempted to ask regarding him being uncloaked and not being able to sneak in properly, only to be interrupted by him.

"I ran out of energy, okay!?"

Kra'Ser snickered at his misfortune.

"Star Swirl the bearded wing." He muttered, looking around to find the Star Swirl wing directly in front of them but locked behind bars.

"Okay, I've got this." Mike stated, writhing around the floor and sitting up with his hands and legs crossing, allowing a widow mine to unburrow below him and act as a platform, or chair, for him.

At the same time, Twilight, Pinkie Pie and Spike arrived, each with their own highly cliched black latex outfit.

Clearly they did not understand it went out of fashion hundreds of Terran years ago.

"Mike?! Kra'Ser?! Why are you here? Where were both of you when I was looking for you?!"

Kra'Ser and Mike shrugged in perfect coordination.

And then, a guard arrived.

Twilight immediately despaired and dug her head in her hooves, just like an ostrich. A purple horse-looking ostrich that dug its head in its hooves instead of in the ground.

Except ostrichs don't even dig their heads into the ground.

That's physically impossible.

Unless they had tungsten-reinforcered skulls with an armor piercing design.

Which would be cool.

But that would have driven humanity to extinction.

"Hello Mike, hello Kra'Ser, fancy seeing both of you here. Let me open that for you."

And then he opened the barred gate with his magic.

"Very much appreciated." Kra'Ser thanked him, now levitating into the room as if nothing had happened.

"Onward, glorious steed of the Dominion!" Mike yelled while extending his arm to the now open Star Swirl wing, signaling his widow mine mount to move forward. And so it did.

Twilight immediately rushed into the room to find the spell she had been looking for. Pinkie Pie and Spike followed, not really interested.

"Oh boy, archives." Mike muttered to himself upon realizing they were, as you might have guessed, in a place with a lot of paper with text on it. As if he'd care which kind of text-on-paper it was.

"I can't remember where was the spell last time. Care to give a hand?" Kra'Ser asked.

"Fine..." Mike muttered, extending his leg and hitting the widow mine with enough strength for it to beep and flare red.

Then a keyboard appeared from a rectangular opening of the widow mine, labeled 'KEYBOARD DISPENSER'.

Mike took it out and placed it on his lap, then struck two keys at the same time.

Those keys were CTRL and F.

"Time... Time... Time..." Mike whispered to himself as he looked through the results he was given. "Time... What were we searching for again?"

"Time travel."

"Oh. OOOOOH I was getting some random 'land before time' results. Okay so 'Time travel'... One result, found it, it's- Oh, Pinkie Pie found it first. Tough luck."

"Still good that it was found. At least I can 'borrow' it for a while after this."

"Pinkie, you're a genius!" Twilight exclaimed to Pinkie, now holding the scroll with her magic.

"So what happens now?" Mike questioned.

Kra'Ser was slightly unnerved by hearing Mike above him, despite being next to him a few seconds ago. He looked up and saw Mike over his widow mine, but on the ceiling, as if for him gravity was inverse.

"How...?"

"I walked up the wall."

"Yes, but how?"

"...You have seen entire fleets of carriers and battlecruisers flying into a single point in time and space without damage whatsoever as if they were immaterial to the point their combined density rivalled a neutron star, and you're asking me this?"

"Touché."

Twilight focused and casted her spell, now going to the past.

"How long?" Kra'Ser questioned.

"A minute, tops."

And then a minute passed.

Twilight had returned to the future, or present, or future of the past, or... Well, where she was a minute ago. But with her, Mike and Kra'Ser were shot out of the blinding light that brought her back. Mike was shot onto the ground, and Kra'Ser, along with an entire bookcase, were shot towards Mike over his widow mine, striking against him and sending him flying.

"What." Kra'Ser muttered, not understanding what just happened. Copies of him and Mike just arrived.

Twilight remained petrified and speechless.

Pinkie Pie and Spike weren't that knowledgeful on science to understand what was going on.

"Woah... What..." Mike and Mike muttered, moving closer to eachother and mimicking eachother, as if they were in front of a mirror. When one did something, the other did the same at the very same time. One raised his hand, the other did so in perfect synchronization. It was uncanny for both Mikes.

"Monkey see, monkey do." Kra'Ser and Kra'Ser muttered. "...Hey, stop copying me." They told eachother, still in perfect synchronization. "Did I stutter? Hey, shut up! You want to have a go? I'll feedback your damn nostrils to hell!"

As they kept arguing, Mike and Mike moved their hands closer and closer, up until their fingers made contact.

Clearly, what remained of the laws of physics and time-space continuum did not approve. The universe had suddenly imploded by such action and all that remained was a strong blue color with gibberish written over it as everything Mike, Kra'Ser and Twilight could see while floating in the void. The difference, however, was that only the Mike and Kra'Ser from before remained.

"What did you guys do now?!" Twilight questioned, furious.

"Hey, it was Mike's fault." Kra'Ser stated.

"I love you too." Mike muttered.

Pinkie Pie and Spike were all too delighten to float around in zero-g. It fascinated them.

"Mike, you still have that keyboard?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Give me."

Mike, with a swift movement, pushed the keyboard towards Kra'Ser, which slowly ended up floating past the void to him. Once he grabbed it, he decided to press one key.

That key was F10.

Then, the menu appeared.

He clicked, despite not having a mouse, on 'Load'.

Then, he was met with several save files, all of them autosaves.

He found one named 'ItsAboutTime_Autosave_PreUniverseBSoD.SC2SAVE', and without much worry he double clicked it.

He had saved the universe.

In both senses.

Although he actually loaded the universe in this case.

Days later, Kra'Ser and Mike stood outside.

Kra'Ser levitating, and Mike over his widow mine.

Kra'Ser planned to cast the time travel spell to go to the future to see what it had saved for them.

"Didn't the spell only allow you to go back in time?"

"Isn't that why we turned around just now?"

"Kra'Ser, you're a genius. Go ahead." Mike complimented it.

It wasn't sarcasm.

With a bit of focus, Kra'Ser casted the spell, bringing them to the future.

"Uhhh..." Mike muttered, confused, seeing before him a neverending soil of creep with hatcheries and innumerable zerg structures and overlords all over the place. "Are you sure you didn't get some sort of teleport spell by accident?"

"Most likely."

"How did both of you get here?" The corrupted voice of a woman asked behind them.

Kra'Ser and Mike turned around, and before their eyes stood a strange woman. A woman whose anatomy shared both human and zerg traits, infested but still with intelligence and consciousness.

"Hey, templar, is that the 'Queen bitch of the universe' I kept hearing about back in Korhal?"

"Probably." Kra'Ser answered nonchalantly.

"Both of you still have not answered my question."

Without much worry, Mike flipped the bird at the infested woman just as the spell wore off, returning them to where they were before.

Chapter 22: A Canterlot Mêlée à Trois - Part 1

Just another bright day in Ponyville's outskirts, with the mane 6 having a picnic, and Mike and Kra'Ser generally being useless a little further away.

"From what I've seen and read, it seems that all unicorns have telekinesis by default." Kra'Ser remarked, levitating, sitting in the air while holding a book open with one hand. "Doesn't say how exactly it's carried out, only concentration... It seems to be an inborn instinctive trait like... Well... Breathing."

"You already learned levitation, dipshit." Mike ranted, slowly spinning in the air like a planet. "Put me down."

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"You're an asshole, you know that?"

"All too well. Anything you know about teleportation?"

"Do I look like I know anything of that!?"

"Shame. All I could find from this book is that it required a lot of concentration. I wonder..."

Kra'Ser's thoughts were interrupted by a burp that originated from elsewhere. He turned around to figure out what it was, to see Spike barfing a letter with his green flame coming out of his stomach. He realized he had an opportunity, and so, attempted to teleport to Spike's location, making Mike fall to the ground with a scream by not focusing on his telekinesis anymore.

Such was the speed of Protoss reaction time that in the time it took Kra'Ser to hear the burp, turn around, figure out what it was and teleport, the letter was in mid air after Spike barfed it out. Within less than a second Kra'Ser teleported to Spike's location and ended up, although not intentionally, holding Spike's head down with a hand to the ground with enough force to dig it into it, and holding his letter with the other.

"Now what could this be?" Kra'Ser questioned himself aloud.

"Kra'Ser!" Twilight exclaimed, beginning to focus to take the letter out of his hands with her telekinesis.

"Nope." The Templar stated, teleporting right on top of Mike's back as he laid on the ground.

"Give that back!" The purple pony kept pestering him.

"Dear Twilight, I am sure you are etc..." Kra'Ser began reading the letter, although without much interest. "Wedding... Ceremony... Fluttershy do this, Pinkie Pie do that, yaddah yaddah... Twilight... Most important role... Tampa tampa tampa... Kra'Ser and Mike forbidden entry-- Wait, what!?"

"Whut." Mike muttered, raising his head from the ground, and with his lungs being crushed under Kra'Ser's weight.

"Here, read this." Kra'Ser stated, shoving the letter on his face.

"Can't see shi-"

"When I was just a filly, and I found it rather silly..." Twilight began singing.

"What." Kra'Ser and Mike questioned, frightened by the thought of another completely spontaneous theme song being sung.

Their fears were true.

"Get us out of here!" Mike yelled, grabbing the letter on his face with his hand and desperately trying to stand up with the other.

With a firm movement, Kra'Ser struck his palms together. In an instant, they were teleported away. Now they had reached Kra'Ser's base, with their presence being noted by two zealots and a stalker.

"Augh... My neck..." Mike grunted as he stood up. He had not landed properly at all, doubly emphasized by the sound of his neck cracking as he moved it to relieve the pain.

"Wasn't my intention." Kra'Ser reassured him, levitating.

"That's reassuri--"

"Kind of hard to control teleportation properly anyways."

"...Dick." He muttered. Afterwards, he began unfolding the crumpled up letter he had been holding. "Alright, so... It pains me to say this, I assume it's Celestia talking, but Mike and Kra'Ser are forbidden entry to Canterlot while the wedding takes place. If it was at any other moment, we could let them in, but we have to be extremely careful and the security measures that would be needed if they were to enter would be far too taxing. Do not take them with you when you arrive. Worry not about them wishing to go on their own, I'm fairly confident we can keep them out. Also, don't let them read this. Mike, in particular. I fear how they would react. That's all. What do you think?"

"They probably don't want you destroying absolutely everything. Although including me despite you being the brute here was uncalled for."

"Or!" Mike exclaimed. "Maybe... Maybe they are hiding something from us!"

"You're a retard."

"Hear me out on this, maybe they have some sort of forbidden magic they don't want you to use beca--"

"Pack up, we're leaving!" He exclaimed, dropping to the ground from levitation and walking in the general direction of Canterlot with feverish haste.

"Easy now, fuzzy little man peach." Mike stated. From below him, a widow mine appeared, with Mike sitting on it as it ascended into the surface. Soon enough it began walking and catching up with Kra'Ser. "Why don't you teleport us there?"

"I don't know the area enough and I don't know enough of the teleportation spell."

"We've been there several times, what do you mean you 'don't know the area enough'?!"

"Because I wasn't trying to memorize it or even trying to make an effort to remember every detail of that damn place before!"

"Fine, geez."

After a long walk through the fields, the Protoss and the Terran, with his widow mine mount, arrived to the outskirts of Canterlot.

"Well fuck." Mike ranted.

Their trip had been cut short due to an unforeseen factor. Namely, a giant shield that blocked their path into the castle. Or city. City-castle.

Perhaps.

"You know, we could have taken the train." Mike added.

"The ponies wouldn't have let us. Everyone knows we're forbidden entry."

"Hm, I see..."

Mike kept looking at the shield with confusion, unsure of what the purple bubble was. Curious, he raised his right hand and moved it towards it.

"Why did they put up a shield this big?" Kra'Ser questioned to himself, unaware of Mike. "This only raises more questions. Where did they get the technology to power all of this without a pylon...? Must be magic. I wonder if I can learn it..."

Kra'Ser's attention, however, shifted as soon as he heard a strange noise coming from right next to him. A hissing sound, like something being deep-fried.

"...Is something burning?" Kra'Ser asked, turning his head towards Mike.

"We have a problem." Mike stated, looking at his hand that was now just bone. No flesh, no glove, nothing. Just bone.

Luckily, Kra'Ser didn't have a nose to smell the deep-fried, disintegrated flesh and glove material.

"Doesn't that hurt?" Kra'Ser questioned, seeing how Mike was almost completely unfazed by losing his hand.

"It probably does." Mike answered. "I can barely think straight with all the painkillers my suit injected me. Tell me, did I always have three arms?"

Kra'Ser leaned his head away from Mike, thoroughly disturbed by his explanation and the question. Then, he forced himself to focus on the shield.

"The ponies can get in and out, so there must be opening somewhere. Probably guarded." Kra'Ser stated.

"What's the plan?"

"Be patient." He stated before disappearing in a spark of light, having teleported away back to his base.

Mike, dumbfounded, looked around trying to find Kra'Ser until the revelation that he had really left struck him.

"You fucking rotten squid..." He cursed, commanding the widow mine to turn around and walk back to base.

"Kra'Ser, I'm in position." Mike spoke through his helmet's in-built radio, pressing his right hand's index finger on where his ear would be and holding a tiny, cloaked observer under his left arm. His right hand, starting from the wrist, was completely replaced by a slim, mechanical hand. Patiently, he awaited a response as he leaned against the wall of Ponyville's train station, making sure to remain out of sight by any means possible.

Obviously, the observer was visible to him because Kra'Ser's forces were not hostile too him.

Too much.

"Good." Kra'Ser answered through Mike's radio, with the usual static and distortion slightly drowning his voice. "I can see you on my minimap, and I have my screen on you. Now get that observer into the train somehow, if it all goes as planned it'll move through the shield along with the ponies."

"What if it doesn't?"

"I don't know. You get your army and break the shield with brute force, perhaps. Whatever is inside, I want to know it."

"Alright, gotcha-"

"I know what you're thinking, and I swear to Adun if you purposefully make this fail just to attack Canterlot with an entire army I'll break your shins with a coffee table."

"...Fine, fine..."

He lowered his mechanical hand and raised his observer with his two arms in front of him, looking at it.

"You ready, pal?"

The observer made a noise that sounded close to approval.

"Alright. You're lucky you don't have pain receptors."

Mike held the observer with one hand, and with the other he struck the cloaking field activation on his chest. The observer, having heard his remark, made a noise that clearly showed confusion. Quickly, Mike began running towards the train and gathered speed, until he threw the observer a tiny distance in front of him and kicked him forward as it descended. The observer's shield blinked by the strength of Mike's punt, and its Protoss structure bent inwards. The observer, now creating noises of sheer terror and pain, flew right through the train's window, breaking it as it entered and causing commotion among the ponies inside, who could not see the observer but had witnessed the window shattering.

"Alright cap', it's inside." Mike boasted, placing his mechanical index finger on the side of his helmet to talk to Kra'Ser. Feeling pride of his accomplishment, he turned around and walked just a few steps away.

"The observer's shields are depleted and is barely alive. What the hell were you thinking?!"

"Who cares, it's inside. As long as it has at least 1hp it's good as new."

"Adun dammit... You'll be the death of me..."

At that moment, the train's air horn deafened those in the station, along with Mike and Kra'Ser, who could hear it through Mike's radio. Following was the engine's rhythmical sound and the full weight of the train slowly but surely moving along the tracks. Mike, still cloaked, turned around and stared at the train's movement.

"Kras, you seeing this?" He asked.

"Yes indeed." Kra'Ser answered.

Mike moved his mechanical finger from his radio to his screen-view switch barely a few milimetres away and flipped it, rendering one of his two mask's eyes as a complete screen where we could see his current position from a top-down view, the minimap at the bottom left, and a user interface that covered roughly a fifth of the screen at the bottom. The minimap had changed from conventional UIs, now with a switch added that would show the entire explored map of Equestria with Kra'Ser's and his bases scattered around. The default minimap, however, was just big enough to show the fog-of-war-surrounded train station, barely a twentieth the size of the entire unexplored minimap.

As the train moved out of the station into the fog of war, it became revealed and visible, following the tracks into the unknown path to Canterlot thanks to the observer inside.

"I guess that's it for now." Kra'Ser stated. "Only thing to do is wait until it gets to Canterlot. Probably in an hour or so. Or a few seconds if that time anomaly characteristic of this universe occurs again."

"What do you think is inside?"

"Couldn't care less as long as it's something about their magic that I can get my hands on."

"You're no fun, man."

Something startled Mike at that very moment after he finished his sentence. He could see with his peripheral vision how his arm, which he had been holding up for his hand to be placed against his helmet, flickered from transparent to opaque in a quick manner before returning to normal, cloaked. It was a sign that he was running low on energy.

And it was also a sign that his suit was stupidly defective, seeing as it would not flicker even if it was on its last seconds of energy.

"Must be the reaper helmet causing a bit of interference." Mike ranted before turning around again and running away, aiming to stop behind the building of the train station. There, he thought, he would be able to rest and regain energy to escape.

He had succeeded. It wasn't a long sprint, were it too long he'd have ran out of energy and would have been visible to the few ponies that remained on the station. His energy ran out, and his cloak faltered and faded, right as he arrived behind the building. Feeling safe, he decided to sit down against the wall.

"If I may interject," Kra'Ser spoke through Mike's radio, "I don't know much about terran technology, but I suggest you revert to using a ghost helmet instead of a reaper gasmask. To be honest I have no idea what went through your head when you thought that."

"Aw man, I thought it'd look cool."

"Well there's your problem. Anyways, heads up, the observer's about to cross the shield."

"What-- Oh Hell." Mike spoke in surprise.

Immediately, he brought his hand to the side of his mask and tinkered with his screen controls. Surprsingly enough, in the minimap a trail was shown that went to the middle half of the minimap. The train, with the observer inside, had crossed that great distance in just a minute. Contrary to the usual scale of minimaps in the Korpulu sector, this one covered kilometres. He moved his cursor into the minimap and clicked on the end of the trail that cut through the fog of war. Immediately, his screen shifted to the place in question, with the train going at quite a slow pace. Mike moved the screen a slight bit northwards, and noticed the train moving right into the shield Kra'Ser and he had spotted earlier.

The big bad shield that ate his right hand.

The shield's surface in front of the train began flickering in an isolated area, roughly the size of the train's front.

"Brace for impact." Mike stated, seeing the train moving closer and closer.

"Don't get hopeful." Kra'Ser retorted. "Even if the observer's destroyed, we won't launch a full-scale invasion.

"What? Why?"

"Do you not understand that if we attack Canterlot we're going to be fucked for life?!"

"How so? We can't harm them and they can't harm us. Well, too much anyways."

"You're an idiot."

"I've been called that."

"How the hell did you end up as a commander anyways?"

"Dunno. Terran commanders get their memories wiped clean and indoctrinated."

"...Damn, that's depressing."

"Beats me. Hey, look, the train's crossing the shield."

And so it was. The train moved through the flickering area of the shield, slowly, without much trouble at all. Even the observer managed to cross unhindered, leaving them with the idea that the shield blocked everything indiscriminately and that had to be manually 'opened' to let anyone in.

"Well fuck, it got through." Kra'Ser remarked, surprised.

"Mission accomplished." Mike stated in a smug, proud tone.

"Oh shut up, you almost destroyed the observer when you punted it."

"Yeah, too bad. Collateral damage and whatnot."

"What if it was destroyed!?"

"Just send another one."

"As if there'd be another opportunity!"

"Shame."

"You terrans are pretty damn fucking brutal, and not in the good way."

"Yeah, I know." Mike stated, snickering. "You've seen nothing."

"Explain."

"Well..."

"Yeah?"

"This time..."

"Mhm."

"Back in Korhal IV..."

"Uh-huh..."

"When the confederacy was back in charge before the Dominion..."

"Yes?"

"We terrans nuked the planet enough to leave it as a barren wasteland."

"I don't know what scares me more. Your kind, or the Zerg."

"Well it's now the capital of the Dominion after it took over."

"You guys made a barren wasteland your capital? What happened to the other one? Wasn't it Tarsonis?"

"Well, we rebuilt Korhal. Tarsonis... Tarsonis... Ah yes, we unleashed a horde of Zerg with a psi emitter to massacre the entire population and leave it as a lifeless planet."

Kra'Ser was left silent.

"Hey buddy, you there?"

"...Yeah, yeah. Just... Forget I even asked. Hopefully you're too stupid to even come up with a plan like that."

"Like what?"

"Praised be Adun."

"Alright. So, how's the observer going?"

Mike switched focus to his screen. He saw the entrance to the shield, with the train and observer gone for they had moved off-screen. He moved the camera and locked it over the observer, making it follow it as it moved. All over Canterlot, an innumerable amount of guards was present. Far more than ever before.

"Damn..." Mike whispered to himself in awe.

"It's a shame we didn't smuggle more observers in the train. It's going to take a while to see everything."

At that moment, Shining Armor entered the observer's line of sight, just at the time he strengthened the shield with his magic right in front of Twilight Sparkle.

"What the hell was that?" Kra'Ser questioned, intrigued. "Whoever that fucker is, I'll know how he did that even if I have to beat him up."

Mike remained silent, slightly afraid of Kra'Ser's determination.

"Well, he's Shining Amor." Kra'Ser added, now knowing of the white unicorn's name.

"How did you find out?"

"I checked his unit card."

"...Oh. Well, shouldn't we be looking elsewhere with the observer?"

"Oh piss off, I want to know how that white unicorn did that."

"Dammit..."

Kra'Ser's observer remained vigilant, floating over the general area above Shining Armor and Twilight Sparkle, following them as they went up a tower and stood in a small bridge connecting it to another.

"Aaaaaany second now..." Kra'Ser muttered, impatient.

He and Mike, despite Twilight and Shining Armor talking of a few events, did not pay attention to them at all. Kra'Ser was solely focused on what Shining Armor had done, and Mike focused on the nothingness of the universe.

All until...

"Look out, pink Alicorn walkin in-- Wait... What." Mike stated upon noticing yet an alicorn that was neither Celestia nor Luna.

"Yeah cool." Kra'Ser shrugged it off, unfazed.

"Weren't there supposed to be just two alicorns?"

"How am I supposed to know? It's not doing anything, I don't care."

"Well, it's talking to Twilight, so it's doing something."

"Mike, we have clearly passed the point where we're surprised by a bunch of animated pastel-coloured miniature horses with giant eyes being capable of speech."

"Damn."

Kra'Ser was left unfazed and uninterested, but Mika still had a clear fascination with the third alicorn. Curious, he hovered his screen cursor towards her and clicked her, marking her with a small green halo surrounding her, and with her information being revealed in the UI at the bottom of the screen.

"That's interesting..." Mike whispered to himself. "I thought there were only two alicorns in this world... I've never heard of a third one before. 'Princess Mi Amore Cadenza'. Fancy name right there. Let's see... Attributes, attributes... 'Biological'. Well, that's a no brainer. 'Light'. Well... She has wings, I guess, so it fits better than armored. 'Psionic', yeah she does magic. 'Insect'. ...Wait, what? Insect? 'Changeling'. What."

He remained dumbfounded, staring at the pink alicorn's attributes.

"Hey, Kra'Ser, take a look at this." Mike called.

"For the last time, if--"

"Oh shut the fuck up and look!"

"Fine! What?"

"Check the pink alicorn's attributes."

"Alright, alright..."

What followed was silence. In that silence, it was clear Kra'Ser was moving his cursor and checking the pink alicorn's unit information.

However, the silence remained for far longer than it'd be normally expected to.

"Kras?" Mike called for him.

All answer that he received was a grim silence. Still, that silence was cut short by the sudden noise of protoss units and buildings being warped in, followed by the violent and abrupt static that cut the conversation.

"Kras, you there buddy? Kras! ...Fuck."

He slowly stood up and switched off his screen view, allowing him to stare at his immediate surroundings with his own eyes.

Lo and behold, he was completely surrounded by dozens of armored guards, leaving any and all chances of escape marginal at best.

"What are you doing here, Mike?" One of the guards asked.

"Oh- Uhm... Fancy day, isn't it?" Mike despaired, backing off against the wall further and desperately looking around for a way to escape.

"You are not allowed in Canterlot, I assume you were told. Why are you here when a train just left for Canterlot?"

"Well... That's a funny story, isn't it?" He said, still trying to figure something out. Until he came up with something that'd only be reserved as last resort: Simply charge against the guards and hurl himself over their lines.

"Gentlemen!" He spoke, raising both arms and moving one step forward. "You will always remember this day as the day you almost caught Commander Michael Angelo--"

"We are leaving!" A voice spoke among a furious electrical noise that originated right behind Mike, just before out of the static appeared Kra'Ser, locked Mike's neck with his arm, and teleported away in the blink of an eye.

"Arcturus dammi-Agh!" Mike grunted, crash landing over the roof of a tower in Canterlot. That tower, as Kra'Ser had desired, was directly above Shining Armor, Twilight and Cadence.

"This psionic technique is still new to me." Kra'Ser stated, levitating down onto the roof. "Come on, get up!"

He had teleported them both in the air instead of on solid surface.

"Looks like they actually expected us." Kra'Ser continued, spotting an entire squadron of pegasi guards flying in their direction through the air.

Immediately, with a horrifyingly distorted warcry, Mike gripped his rifle and made a mad dash for the edge of the roof, jumping and aiming to land right against Cadence. Unfortunately, his plan had failed by not taking into account the tremendous speed of the pegasi, and being tackled by one of them in mid-air. At the same time, a dozen pegasi surrounded Kra'Ser.

Lacking a plan, Kra'Ser simply slowly raised his hands in defeat, sporting a frown.

"Mike?! Kra'Ser?! What are you two doing here?! Attacking us like that!" Twilight exclaimed, now aware of their presence.

Kra'Ser simply looked down to Twilight as she talked. Besides her, he saw Shining Armor and Cadence. Then, he had an idea.

Quickly, he focused and teleported just like before, but this time right behind Cadence.

"Death to the lastborn!" He yelled as a furious stream of electricty began running down his hands, preparing to cast a psionic storm upon her.

Unfortunately, a barrage of magic missiles from below by the unicorn guards struck him, knocking him out instantly. Unconscious, he stumbled back and tripped, thus falling from the small bridge that connected the two towers, towards the ground.

"...Are those the insane ones I heard of?" Shining Armor questioned, frightened.

"She's a zerg! She's a zerg! Arcturus dammit, she's a- Let me go, you fucking oversized flying dogs!" Mike yelled and yelled, struggling against the five pegasi that attempted to restrain him in mid-air. With luck, he managed to swing his rifle with his free hand and swat away four of them, but lost balance and desperately screamed and clung to the last one as they both fell due to his weight, and the inability of the remaining pegasus to keep him in flight.

Twilight could only force an awkward laugh.

"They're more frightening up close." Cadence remarked. "What are they?"

"Well, umm..." Twilight began answering. "One calls himself a 'Terran', and the other a 'Protoss'... Don't ask me what it means. I don't know what 'Zerg' means either."

"Joke's on you, motherfuckers!" Mike screamed as he crawled on the floor with a leg bent the wrong way, and having three pegasi clinging to him in a desperate attempt to stop him. "I still got HP!"

In a moment's notice, dozens and dozens of pegasi piled up on him, creating a small pegasi mountain and finally silencing him.

"We gotta start thinking through these plans." Kra'Ser stated, sitting in a prison cell against the wall with Mike.

"Remind me what a changeling was again." Mike requested.

"A little fucker that changes form to scout the enemy." He answered, trying to get a view from his observer that still flew around, unnoticed. "The Zerg will arrive soon if that's so."

"I see. Tell me, why are we here instead of teleporting away?"

"What else do you think we'll do? Not only would security be tightened by now, if we get out they'll look for us too, and we won't be able to do shit because our weapons are useless against those who are not from our universe."

Kra'Ser spotted something strange through the observer. Through it, he saw Twilight staring through an almost closed door at Cadence and Shining Armor inside a building. Inside, he saw how Cadence casted a strange, green-tinted spell against Shining Armor, who was left disoriented with his eyes slightly green for a couple of seconds. Twilight, terrified, turned around and ran away.

"You saw that?" He asked Mike.

"Damn right I did." He answered, staring at the screen on his helmet's eyes. "Should we inform her?"

"Do you think it'd work?"

"Probably. She knows something weird's up."

"Touche."

Immediately, Kra'Ser stood up and began focusing to cast his teleportation spell.

Kra'Ser and Mike reappeared, engulfed in sparks of electricity for a few seconds before dissipating. They were right behind the throne of the Canterlot palace, having reappeared just on ground level instead of mid-air and crashing.

"You're getting better." Mike complimented Kra'Ser.

"Something's... Wrong."

"Oh, so you finally do something right and turns out it's wrong?!"

"...Shit, I mixed the teleportation and time spells by accident." Kra'Ser noted, seeing through the windows of the palace how it was a bright day. Seconds ago, it was night in the prison.

"Is that even possible?!"

"We put up with things that would make any single Protoss or Terran shoot themselves as soon as they tried to understand, and you're asking me that?!"

"Oh shut up..."

To figure out what exactly was happening, and when they arrived to the palace, Mike and Kra'Ser slowly moved while sitting on the floor to see past the throne towards the entrance. Just then, they saw Twilight, lying on the stairs that led to the throne and crying in front of Cadence.

"I'm sorry..." She apologized, tearful.

"You will be." Cadence answered in a frighteningly low tone, just as her horn began glowing green with magic.

At a moment's notice, green flames began surrounding Twilight in a circle, unable to react out of fright.

"Shoot the fucker!" Kra'Ser commanded Mike, pointing at the pink alicorn with his finger.

"ROIT THEN!" Mike acknowledged with passion, taking out his gun and jumping over the throne. Immediately, he aimed fired a burst against the alicorn, but with no effect whatsoever as the bullets bounced off her just as if they were made of rubber.

Twilight had already disappeared by the flames, but Cadence's attention shifted to Mike and Kra'Ser.

"Whatever that thing is..." Mike spoke, terrified, seeing the pink alicorn walk towards him as he backed off towards Kra'Ser. "...It's not from our universe..."

"What!?" Kra'Ser exclaimed.

"I don't know!"

"You two..." Cadence calmly spoke, using her magic to engulf the two in a circle of green flames. "It was amusing how your own stupidity prevented you from doing anything at all."

Mike and Kra'Ser, seeing how the green flames moved closer and closer, hugged each-other and let out a painfully loud scream. As soon as the flames came into contact with them, a great, blinding explosion was created. Nothing remained save for the black residue of the explosion on the ground.

"...That wasn't supposed to happen." Cadence remarked, seeing as how they were supposed to sink into the ground just like Twilight, but exploded instead.

To be continued...

Chapter 23: A Canterlot Mêlée à Trois - Part 2

The scenery was no longer the same as in Equestria. Now, instead of lush forests and fields, with creatures and rivers, a lone and desolate wasteland was present. The ground was dark, almost pitch black, covered in a thin veil of ashes that spread to the horizon. The few rivers that were present were not of water, but of lava and molten rocks, with smoke of the boiling elements striking against it by the force of the tectonic plates shaking for a short while. In the skies, only dark clouds were seen, giving the red tint of the scenery an even darker colour as they blocked the sun. The air was heavy, hot enough to make it difficult to breathe for anyone who did not have a breather, and with little burning sparks littered in the air.

"Nngh..." Mike grunted as he woke up. Conscious at last, he used his arms to help him slowly but surely stand up. The first thing he saw was the desolate wasteland, hardly believing his own eyes as he stared around. Wherever he looked, only ashes and fire remained.

At the same time, Kra'Ser regained consciousness and stood up next to him.

"This place reminds me of Char." Mike stated.

"You were in Char?"

"Yes, back in the Alpha Squadron."

"So you were in the Alpha Squadron..." Kra'Ser remarked, just before grunting of pain and holding his head with one hand.

"What is it? You hit your head on something?"

"No, that's not it. I feel something weird in this place, a strange psionic presence."

Mike, confused, simply looked around the scenery once more. He found nothing that would be related to Kra'Ser's statement.

"We won't find anything standing around, and we still need to find a way back." Mike stated.

"What do we do? There isn't any hint of where to start looking, if there's a way to begin with."

"Look over there." Mike pointed to the horizon behind them, next to Kra'Ser. "All around us there are rivers of lava, they'll block our way eventually. That way is clear, and I see some high ground. We can start looking there."

"You might act like an idiot, but you still know a few things." Kra'Ser complimented him.

The Terran and the Protoss started walking in the general direction of the high ground. On their trip, they could see nothing but ashes and fire in the distance, a deserted landscape void of life and activity. Their steps, as if they were walking on snow, dug themselves into the ashes.

Once reached, they were stopped by the cliffs of the high ground they had seen, too steep to be climbable. Their common sense dictated they should walk around it, and so they did. Eventually they found a natural ramp that headed up to the high ground, at an angle that made it easily walkable on. Immediately, they walked up and walked further, finding something particularly familiar.

They had found a destroyed Terran base.

Kra'Ser's eyes sparked up by the implication. They were no longer in Equestria, that was sure, leaving one alternative for him.

"...We are in our universe." The templar stated.

"Indeed we are." Mike acknowledged, walking past the ruined buildings into the heart of the terran base, where he found the command center and dead SCVs lying around. The mineral patches and vespene geysers were almost untouched, as if the Terran base was destroyed barely minutes after being set up. "This command center is still operable. Shame about the SCVs, though, I could've used them. Seems like a new expedition, too."

After his statement, and seeing as he had no minerals to spend on an SCV, and no SCVs to dig up minerals for him, he walked up to a mineral patch. He took aim with his rifle to the base of the mineral patch and fired a short burst, but to no effect. Silent and defeated, he simply walked back.

"...What were you attempting?" Kra'Ser questioned.

"Was trying to get 50 minerals to get an SCV. Seems I can't without one to begin with. Shame it's a normal command center too, if it was an Orbital I'd call down a MULE."

"Without an SCV and without resources you'll get nowhere. That command center is useless as it is. Might as well-- Hold up..."

"Hm?"

"My minimap is flaring up, it's... Pointing at something in the fog of war."

"Where exactly?"

"That way, seems to be in the high ground too, next to us."

Curious, Mike followed Kra'Ser to where his minimap guided him. The same scenery was ever present: Ashes, ashes, and more ashes, but as the fog of war was lifted, strange rubble began appearing. Further and further, horrifyingly damaged Protoss buildings came into sight. Worse yet, it was being razed down by a very small group of zerglings. The base was defenceless.

The sight of the zerglings was enough to send a cold chill down their spine. The Zerg were present, and they were also reminded that, being in their own universe, the possibility of death loomed over them.

"I can cast a psionic storm over them, you deal with them once they run to us." Kra'Ser stated.

"You got it." Mike answered, readying his rifle and aiming at the zerglings.

Kra'Ser focused and, immediately, engulfed the zerglings in a storm. As soon as the first spark struck them, they were alerted of their presence and quickly rushed past the storm towards them. Kra'Ser's storm was not enough to kill any of them, but it was enough to damage them. Mike easily dispatched of them with his rifle before they came close, eliminating the threat.

Before anything, Kra'Ser quickly teleported next to the Nexus and placed his hand on it, simply to figure out what happened. What he had not expected, however, was for the Nexus, and the entire base, to change allegiance to him in an instant. The remaining buildings were now his, comprised of a nexus, three pylons, and a gateway. Two probes were also his, who were hiding behind the mineral patch from the zerglings' attack.

"That's it!" Mike exclaimed. "Get those probes mining, give me 50 minerals when you have them, and we'll start our bases again."

"It will be done."

It didn't take long for their two bases to be reinforced as much as they could. It was obvious the presence of the Zerg was the most threatening factor in this world, and so they could not take chances in being caught undefended. From a simple base, and thanks to the unnaturally great supply of minerals and vespene geysers in their two bases, they managed to fortify their positions to defend against any potential assault from where it may come. Along the cliffs, siege tanks, bunkers with marines, turrets, and cannons covered the fields, with the two ramps that led to their base holding most of their effort: One of the ramps was next to Mike's base, and the other was next to Kra'Sers. Those were the only two choke points where land units would be forced to cross if they wished to arrive.

Mike and Kra'Ser knew this very well, as their years of military experience had shown. They both stood outside, in the ground between their two bases in front of a crude sketch of the map drawn on the floor with Mike's rifle.

Mike, of course, now had a proper Ghost helmet to fit his Ghost outfit instead of an incompatible reaper gasmask.

Fashion be damned.

"We can expect the Zerg to attack from points A and B." Mike stated, pointing at the two ramps. "My siege tanks and bunkers can take any ground assault by themselves without problem, although with this 200 unit cap that returned, that's the only thing I can defend against properly right now."

"I've spent my resources on a fleet to defend against the aerial units. The skies are ours, you can leave it to me."

But as soon as Kra'Ser finished his statement, a piercing pain struck his mind. The intensity of the pain was enough to force him to bow a small amount and bring his hand to his head, closing his eyes and letting out a small yell.

"Kras, you okay?" Mike questioned, worried.

In the next instant, both the Terran and the Protoss could hear and feel a strange voice inside their minds, as if it came from nowhere but at the same time, everywhere. They could feel the vibrations of a voice as if someone was talking to their ears, but at the same time the distance of hearing something from far away. It was an uncanny mixture of sound, unnerving and terrifying the same.

"The more I get rid of your kind, the more they appear elsewhere." The voice spoke, taunting, insulting them.

The fear of this unknown situation, added to the fright of having never felt such a presence or event ever before, made Mike and Kra'Ser quickly and desperately look around for the source of the voice, if there even was one.

No moment had passed until Mike had encountered a strange, eerie aura as he stared to the cliffs kilometres away, as if an entity or horror awaited there. He experienced a feeling that could only be describes as being trapped in a nightmare or suffering a night terror, just by looking in that general direction. Before anything, Mike zoomed in his vision with his Ghost's helmet to be sure that it wasn't his sanity slipping away, but as soon as he scanned the scenery he had, unfortunately, found the source of his horror. A tall woman dressed in ghost armor without a helmet, but with zerg features being clearly apparent all over her body.

"Th--Th--th...That's..." Mike stuttered, attempting to inform Kra'Ser but being left horrified. "You--...Time travel--...Future--...Woman--"

"...That's the infested terran we saw back then!" Kra'Ser completed his sentence with the same fright, staring at the same direction as Mike.

"Is... Is th-that the... Queen of Blades...?" Mike kept stuttering.

"We're going to die..." Kra'Ser sighed, defeated.

"Hmph." The Infested Ghost boasted with a smirk, amused at their reaction. Afterwards, she simply bowed, bringing her hand to her chest and extending the other to the air besides her. "My name is Charlotte. I'll be the last person you'll get to know."

"Oh, she's not the Queen of Blades. We're safe." Mike stated, regaining his composure completely in an instant.

"...What." Charlotte muttered as she returned to her previous posture, perplexed at his sudden change in behavior.

"Well if it's not Kerrigan, we can focus on a way to return." Kra'Ser told Mike.

Charlotte became furious at them, as their attitude had indirectly insulted her.

"Enough games." Charlotte stated, with her voice still echoing in Mike's and Kra'Ser's minds. With a single command from her mind, she had summoned behind her an innumerable horde that slowly came to view in the distance. Zerg lifeforms, even Ultralisks and Broodlords filled the horizon. Mike and Kra'Ser stared with their undivided attention at her doings, aware that she would have no reasons to not attack them at this point. "If you give up now, your deaths will be swift and painless. Otherwise... Infestation is coming to you--"

At a moment's notice, Mike gave an order. Immediately, a single siege tank turned its gun and immediately fired at Charlotte's general direction, missing her but striking an ultralisk that remained besides her. The gigantic beast had remained wounded, giving a loud howl as it slowly but steadily began regenerating with its Zerg attributes. It seemed as if the siege tank's range was not great enough to hit Charlotte.

"We surrender!" Mike yelled, taunting. "Come a little closer!"

"...So be it." Charlotte answered, furious, just as she and her Zerg backed off out of sight.

All that remained was the unnerving silence of the field, with not a single Zerg in sight as of yet.

Mike snickered and brough his hand to his helmet. "Man, the things we put up with, huh."

"You were in the Alpha Squadron, I'm sure you think this'll be easy." Kra'Ser remarked.

All of a sudden, a new objective appeared in their tactical view. It was a simple objective, almost too simple, even comprised of just a single word.

And the objective was...

'Survive'.

Mike and Kra'Ser were aware of the new objective, but had no words to share. Both were surprised and, at the same time, barely knowing of the implications of the objective as they silently stared at eachother. Until...

"Your forces are under attack." Mike's robotic Terran advisor stated.

Mike was dumbstruck and with a blank mind. All he could do was just turn around to see the source of what was engaging his forces in the ramp.

There he saw them, hordes and hordes of Zerg that covered the fields, as if there were no end to them. Even the horizon itself was made of Zerg organisms, and even then it was hard to see past a short distance because of the Zerg swarm covering the skies. It was unlike anything he had ever seen before, as soon as his forces killed one little Zerg, twenty more took its place in the frontline. The entire population cap of his base consisted of Siege tanks and the marines in the bunkers fortifying both his and Kra'Ser's ramp, but even then they could not even hold the line. The Zerg were too close, close enough to start destroying his bunkers and flood through the ramps, even using themselves as cannon fodder for the siege tanks to cause friendly fire.

"That's... Way above the population cap for any zerg..." Mike stated, seeing no end to the Zerg swarm.

As if the ramp being overwhelmed painfully fast wasn't bad news enough, he could see the line of siege tanks being destroyed even as the bunkers protecting them remained intact. Brood Lords were massacring them from afar, with no way to retaliate with anything Mike had.

"Kras!!" Mike yelled through the drowning sound of the conflict.

"Send them in, every single one of them!" Kra'Ser yelled to his forces.

In an instant, a fleet of phoenixes and void rays supported by carriers rushed to the frontline, with the phoenixes flying low enough to generate the vibrations and wind that forced Mike and Kra'Ser to brace themselves, lest they would have fallen to the ground.

And so it began. Mike's ground forces and Kra'Ser's air fleet against the fury of the Swarm. A painfully one-sided battle.

"How long do we have to survive for!?" Kra'Ser questioned, referring to the objective.

"I don't know! It doesn't have a timer!"

"Adun dammit, we need to find a way out of here, now! Listen, I just had an idea, I have my forces in Equestria and so do you, we can see them, we can use my teleportation and a battlecruiser's hyperdrive to jump to the other universe!"

"Why a battlecruiser!? You have carriers already, why can't we use them!?"

"Because the carriers use the same psionic energy as mine, they'll just cancel eachother out instead of merging! A Terran Battlecruiser's hyperdrive has more chances of fusing with my psionics!"

"...Alright, I'll get to it!"

Quickly, he used his tactical view to select the starport and quickly order a battlecruiser built. Simple as that.

"It will take 90 seconds!" Mike stated.

"90?! We don't have 90 seconds! We'll be dead by then!"

Because of Kra'Ser's statement, Mike decided to take a look at the frontline once more. Holding the line was far from reality, instead being seen as delaying the inevitable. The zerg were slowly pushing forward at a steady pace, with newly made siege tanks coming is as fast as they were being destroyed. The amount of ordinance thrown at the ramp would have rendered it concave against the ground if it wasn't for Koprulu physics. But even then, the Zerg were endless and kept on coming, pushing forward little by little.

"Send two nukes!" Mike ordered, losing his composure.

At his command, two Ghosts who were recruited by Mike's desperation rushed to a ramp each while cloaked, then began aiming their lasers at the ramps where the Nuke's blast range would not harm his units, but destroy the Zerg. Depressingly enough, it would only serve to gain time, for in the fields as far as the eye could see, there were still millions and millions of Zerg. The amount of Zerg in the planet was incalculable at best.

"Nuclear launch detected." Kra'Ser's protoss advisor stated, twice.

"If we weren't in this situation, I'd think you are insane, Mike." Kra'Ser remarked.

"Fools..." Charlotte's voice echoed in their heads at the very same time the Zerg horde broke into a retreat off the ramp. "I will just pull them off until they both land."

"God... Fucking..." Mike ranted, furious, seeing the Zerg retreating to barely outside the nuke's range. "Keep those tanks coming!"

In that instant, however, Mike could hear a static coming from his helmet's radio. Even Kra'Ser heard it from his transmissor.

"Kra'Ser?! Is that you?!" The voice asked, a voice that seemed to echo several times but giving a faint feeling of safety, contrary to Charlotte's aura of horror. "We thought you were dead! This is Aldiir, Executor of the 29th expeditionary fleet looking for survivors of the 27th. I didn't think we'd find you here! We will come out of hyperspace in 60 seconds, defend yourselves as best as you can!"

"Pfft... Sixty..." Mike muttered, knowing his battlecruiser would be finished in less than half that amount. Still, he caught Kra'Ser staring into the void with a joyful expression after that transmission, something that he found weird.

The two nukes fell. The last thing that prevented the zerg from advancing had ended, and resources were too tight with unit production to produce any more nukes. The Zerg, like a tidal wave, rushed against the Protoss and Terran bases unhindered by anything thrown at them.

"Your base is under attack." Mike's advisor stated.

"What?!" Mike questioned, already having enough of the battle and knowing that there weren't any bunkers remaining to trigger that alarm. Turning around, he faced the scenery of his factories and barracks being destroyed by Brood lords that had been flanking his base while the nukes fell.

"Fuck, no! the starport!" He yelled, seeing as the only thing between the Brood lords and the starport were the barracks and factories themselves. "Kras! Get them!"

Kra'Ser's air fleet immediately moved in to defend the starport. There were barely more than a couple phoenixes and void rays remaining, the Swarm had killed the rest, and no carrier had survived. The Swarm, now with complete air supremacy, laid waste to the fortifications on the two ramps as the Zerg flooded in. The line had been broken.

"Fall back! Fall back to the starport, that thing must not fall!" Mike yelled.

From Kra'Ser's base and his, the remaining ground and air units regrouped on the starport. In an instant, undefended, Kra'Ser's base was completely demolished. Even a great majority of Mike's base was destroyed, his command center included and his scvs pulled in to repair his units with the last resources he had. Now both Protoss and Terrans made their last stand, with every single loss they took now being irreplaceable.

Their last stand was all but glorious. As soon as they backed off, the Zerg poured in from the ramps and were able to surround them completely, allowing them to start massacring their way to the core of the formation: The starport, Mike, and Kra'Ser. All of that, happening in less than five seconds.

But one thing remained. The battlecruiser had finished its construction and slowly appeared from inside the starport, rising to the roof of it. A giant ship, the pinnacle of Terran technology, which was their last hope.

"It's here! Everyone get in, we are leaving!" Mike yelled as he rushed to the Battlecruiser's bridge hatch and stood besides it, shooting his rifle at the mutalisks that now attempted to kill him.

"Forty seconds!" Executor Aldiir stated through the transmission.

"Kra'Ser! Come on!" Mike yelled.

But Kra'Ser was immobile, silent.

"Kras! The zerg won't wait for you to make up your mind, get up here!"

"...We can leave, Mike!" Kra'Ser snapped from his silence, yelling. "Forget about Equestria, we can return home!"

"...What?"

"We can return to our normal lives before this all happened, to our people! To the lives we had before!"

Mike simply remained silent at his words, letting them sink into him. What he had just heard from Kra'Ser was shocking in more than one way.

"Don't think that Equestria is our home," Kra'Ser continued. "We just ended up there by accident! With Aldiir, we can return to where we belong!"

"...Shut the fuck up, Kras! It might not be my home, but it's the closest fucking thing I have to one!"

"Do you really think that!?" Kra'Ser yelled with more anger. "Do you really want to abandon the ones that need you the most--"

"Do you?! We ended up returning to our universe just as the ones in the other faced a threat they might not overcome! I don't know what will happen there, but I'm not going to risk it! In this universe, even if we give it our all, we're just a pair of generals among millions, but in Equestria we can make a change! If we leave this universe, the Protoss and Terrans will keep fighting without us, they are not weak! But if we remain here, we would be leaving the others on their own! You and I are Protoss and Terran, we are not weak, nor are the others in this universe, without us they can still fight back! Just as they have fought until now! But the ones in Equestria? They might not even have a chance to properly fight back, and maybe they never will if we don't return!"

At Mike's words, Kra'Ser remained struck silent. It was as if the conflict surrounding them had been drowned by the deafening silence that remained between them, as if time itself had frozen.

"Listen, Kras..." Mike continued, yet now in a calm tone. "You might not think it's your home, that you cannot relate in any way to them, I can understand that... But even with our differences, even by being of entirely different universes, they have grown to accept us among them. Just like a family. I don't want to explain to them why I was the only one to return... If I even return to begin with."

Kra'Ser simply lowered his head, tired of everything and letting Mike's words fill his mind. Thoughts and thoughts ran through him in an instant, clouding his mind and leaving him immobile.

"This is Executor Aldiir, we are out of hyperspace! Hold tight, we are getting you all out of there!"

Above in the skies, a Protoss Fleet came to view as it arrived. Past the Zerg Swarm's air units, the protoss fleet's fighters deployed from the carriers and began engaging the Swarm.

Without delay, Kra'Ser made his decision. He quickly ran and entered the Battlecruiser with Mike, before all hatches were sealed and the ship took off. Hyperspace was achieved in a matter of seconds.

"Kra'Ser, can you hear me?" Aldiir questioned. "Kra'Ser? Kra'Ser! ...Adun forgive us, we were too late..."

Back in Equestria, in the Royal Palace, a great multitude was present, witnessing the union of both Cadence and Shining Armor. On both sides of the long, red carpet that led to the altar where Princess Celestia, Princess Cadence and Shining Armor were present, were two crowds of ponies that remained silent for Celestia's words.

"Princess Cadence and Shining Armor..." She spoke with happiness. "It is my great pleasure to pronounce you--"

"Stop!" A voice yelled from afar, from a distance great enough to lower its volume.

All eyes turned to the voice, who had gained the attention of everyone for interrupting the wedding. Yet, what everyone found at the entrance of the room, standing on the red carpet with the doors wide open, was Twilight Sparkle. All gasped in surprise, until it devolved to chatter of annoyance at yet another of her attempts to disrupt the wedding.

Cadence grunted in irritation at this interruption. "Why does she have to be so possessive of her brother?" She rhetorically asked aloud, only to be met by Celestia's confused stare at her attitude.

Shining Armor was too high on something to even notice, with his eyes green and unfocused reflecting his state.

"...Why does she have to ruin my special day?" Cadence questioned, sobbing, as if trying to fit in with what Celestia would expect her to be.

"Because it's not your special day!" Cadence answered. Cadence Prime. The real cadence. The one who seemed to had run out of L'oreal shampoo midshower and had to make do with soap. The Cadence who walked in through the door past Twilight. "It's mine!"

All gasped. Again.

"...What?!" The Cadence who stood next to the higher-than-Cloudsdale Shining Armor questioned, shocked. "But how did you--..."

Everyone was cut silent by an unforeseen event. It was not noise, it was not something visible, but a vibration instead. An earthquake, they all thought at first. The intensity of the 'earthquake' kept increasing and increasing at a considerable rate, yet all unknowing of the source.

"Something is outside!" A pony stated loudly while staring out of one of the giant, stained glass windows.

Immediately after his statement, everyone ran to the windows in unison, as if they had completely forgotten of what had happened before. Outside, they could see a small object in the distance, flying right towards Canterlot at a considerable speed. As if their confusion wasn't enough, they all received a chill down their spine once they realized that, no, the object was not small at all, it was just at a far greater distance than they had imagined. It was big. Enormous. Bigger than dragons, bigger than an Ursa Minor, even bigger than an Ursa Major. It was bigger than any single object they had eber seen in their lives, striking fear into their eyes by the sheer surprise. But, not so long ago, they had seen an equally terrifying object of the same size. And that was...

A Terran Battlecruiser.

At the same time, inside the Terran Battlecruiser who flew at alarming speed, fast enough to make atmospherical reentry nearly turn it into a giant flaming ball, stood Kra'Ser and Mike, with the crew manning their stations. Through the windshield of the battlecruiser, past the flames of reentry and the horrifyingly violent shaking of the speed at which they were going, they could see Canterlot, still engulfed in its protective shield.

Such was the might of the Battlecruiser, that the only reason its crew were not cooked alive by virtue of it being almost a literal ball of fire, was because its AC unit was not built by Kel-Morians.

"The shield is still up, we won't break it!" Kra'Ser yelled, holding onto anything he could find. It was an earthquake inside the Battlecruiser, and the noise of the vibrations and air scraping against the armor of the ship were almost deafening.

"Prepare the Yamato Cannon!" Mike yelled at his crew.

"It's not going to work, we can't damage it! It's not a protoss shield, it's not from our universe!"

"Then we'll overload it with energy, it has to go somewhere!"

"If that fails we'll end up ramming the shield, we'll be stuck outside for Adun knows how long!"

"Yamato Cannon ready!" One of the crew stated aloud.

"Are you sure this will work?!" Kra'Ser questioned, worried.

"I have no idea!!" Mike yelled back. "Fire!"

From outside the Battlecruiser, on the end of the Yamato Cannon's firing mechanism, particles of energy began appearing and concentrating into a single sphere. It grew in intensity and brightness, until its stability became critical, shaking and bleeding off energy. All the energy that was concentrated was then released, fired from the cannon towards Canterlot, increasing in size almost twofold by the limits that held it in place being eliminated. The energy of a small nuclear explosion was transferred to the projectile which flew at almost tenfold the speed the Battlecruiser was flying at. In almost the blink of an eye, it travelled from the Yamato Cannon's magnetic field to Canterlot's shields, impacting and making the shield flow, as if it was covered by a small amount of water all over it. Immediately, the shield became brighter and brighter until it turned completely white. Such was the brightness of the shield that Mike, Kra'Ser, and the entire crew of the Battlecruiser had to cover their eyes. In an instant, the shield gave in and exploded, showering the skies with bright, searing, white shards of energy that burned out as they flew. The shockwave that it released was intense enough to be felt through the battlecruiser, leaving it to be questioned what the ones on the ground felt.

The shield was now gone.

"It's gone!" Mike yelled, victorious. Immediately after his statement, the entire crew of the battlecruiser broke out in a victorious yell of joy and glory.

"We're going to crash right into Canterlot!" Kra'Ser stated with eagerness.

"All part of the plan! Everyone, brace for impact!"

At his command, all of the crewmen fastened their seatbelts and held onto their helmets. Through the windshield and flames, past the blur and violent shake, they could see how the Battlecrusier kept descending and descending towards the ground, not losing a single fraction of its speed, but gaining it instead. The moment had come when the Battlecruiser finally struck the ground, right over the buildings of Canterlot that were conveniently empty. The force of impact, although not shattering the Battlecruiser, was enough to generate a vibration that rendered everyone almost blind for a few seconds by virtue of disorienting them. The massive vibration turned into an earthquake as the Battlecruiser surfed through the houses, bridges and roads of Canterlot, losing speed as fragments of buildings struck the windshield with no damaging effect. The Battlecruiser, by force of several houses impacting one side of the front more than the other, began turning sideways and drifting through the earth, carving an even wider trail. Eventually, its speed diminished, until it came to a complete halt.

"Alright, it stopped!" Mike yelled, standing up from the fall he had suffered when the Battlecruiser impacted the earth. "Open the hatches!"

At his command, a hatch had opened from the bridge that led outside. At the same time, the almost deafening sound of whirring gears, and slabs of metal scraping against eachother could be heard from inside. Every single hatch in the battlecruiser was being opened, for Mike's forces to flood out.

"Everybody go!" Mike screamed, running to the open hatch to the outside. "Let's go! This is not over yet!"

Kra'Ser followed closely from behind, but as they stepped outside, all they could see around them was a giant swarm of flying entities. They looked like ponies, but insectoid, with their skin dark as ashes and their numbers, while not as great as the zerg, clearly outnumbered by an order of magnitude. Yet, at the same time, Mike's forces ran out from the hatches. Marines, hellions, marauders, vikings that took it to the skies, siege tanks, and even Thors that opened fire to the hostile creatures as soon as they saw them.

"What the hell is happening?" Kra'Ser questioned.

"Imagine if we had not arrived." Mike spoke, before readying his rifle and opening fire at the swarm of flying... Things. "Show them Terran ferocity!" He yelled at his men, who now saturated the skies with bullets and shells.

By his actions, an insect had fallen next to him, unconscious. The two of them were reminded that it was not of their universe, thus being unable to be harmed, yet they could knock them unconscious. They could fight, despite their shortcomings.

"You said you have your men here, did you not?" Mike questioned. "Go teleport to your base, get them here! We'll wait!"

"Immediately." Kra'Ser acknowledged before disappearing in a cloud of electricity.

The sound of cannons and guns kept pounding in the air, with the sight of tracers and falling insects being the only thing seen in the situation. There were enough insect to almost darken the skies, with only a few openings among the swarm for the sunrays to sneak through. Everywhere anyone may shoot, chances of missing their target was none.

Despite the insane amount of ordnance thrown at the insects, it was barely enough to keep them from advancing, yet, the insects would not take a single step back. Until, breaking through the swarm and appearing seemingly of nowhere, entire squadrons of phoenixes arrived, carving a path with their guns. Eventually followed void rays, oracles, and even the dreaded carriers. Shortly afterwards, protoss ground forces broke through and linked up with Mike's men.

Kra'Ser's forced had arrived.

"You changed for the better." Mike whispered to himself, referring to Kra'Ser as he stared at the reinforcements.

"Don't get excited." Kra'Ser stated through a transmission in Mike's helmet. "It seems that Twilight and the rest were in the palace, something happened in there it'd appear. They managed to escape, but the changelings have them surrounded."

"Got it." Mike responsded through his helmet's radio before directing his voice to his and Kra'Ser's troops. "We are moving to Twilight's location, she and the rest are the priority as of now!"

Acknowledging his order, both Protoss and Terran forces slowly began pushing through the swarm of insects towards the palace, a grueling march that could only be compared to a meatgrinding process. In unison they marched while fending off the insects, until the wreck of the Battlecruiser was left behind, abandoned.

Eventually, even the swarm left, following the Terrans and Protoss who pushed their way to the palace and its surroundings. Yet, something remained. From under the burning wrecks, a Terran crawled out. A Terran unlike any other, a woman dressed in Ghost armor with her head uncovered, bleeding and exhausted. What differentiated her from other Terrans was one single trait, something no Terran would ever have by normal means, and that was her anatomy. Terran body, yet paired with Zerg DNA. It was an infested Terran Ghost, who kept crawling from under the Battlecruiser's wreck.

Charlotte.

"You're not..." She grunted and whispered to herself, remaining on the ground. "Going... Anywhere..."

From under the wreck, following her as they crawled out, five drones came to light.

"Go... Find a mineral patch, make a base... Move!" She order.

Immediately, the drones scattered.

Chapter 1: A glitch in the matrix

Inside HQ's Minotaur-class Battlecruiser orbiting planet... Something. 7:30 AM on-board time.

"Commander Mike, you will be sent to Ohana to take care of a Protoss expeditionary fleet for the 435th time. Like every other time, failure is not an option."

"You are going to send me there with just a command center and six SCVs again?"

"Yes."

"Why don't you just throw some 50 Thors in there and call it a day?"

"Dunno."

"..."

"..."

"Fine. Anything I should know?"

"Shoot everything that moves and isn't red."

"Understood."

Out of the battlecruiser, a command center was shot towards the surface. Engulfed in a sphere of fire as it entered the atmosphere yet receiving no damage at all. Once landing safely, six SCVs got out of the building and began collecting minerals while the Command Center began manufacturing more SCVs.

"Alright..." Mike said to himself. "I've fought in this map a hundred times. If my memory doesn't fail me the protoss expeditionary fleet composed of only a Nexus and 6 probes should be... There." He pointed at the other side of the field. Absolutely nothing was there. "Though normally to see it I have to scout it first and lift the fog of war. Only the dead can know peace from this lack of sensors."

A few minutes later...

"Wait, what was I supposed to do again..." Mike thought to himself, until he looked over to the marines and saw them sporting what would appear to be WW1 rifles. He slapped his forehead upon receiving the realization rather brutally. "Get five engineering bays up and running ASAP!!" He yelled to just a single SCV.

"Five?! We ain't needin' dat many to upgrade weapons and armor!" A marauder with his characteristic 'Ghetto brudda' voice said.

"Hmmm..." Mike thought as he scratched his neckbeard with his hand, being careful of not ripping his own throat by accident with his power armor. "Touche... Make it four engineering bays!"

"Uhhh sir..." A marine next to a sensor tower near a cliff worringly said. "Are those red circles with exclamation marks in them friendlies?" Hell knows how Mike managed to get a sensor tower without an engineering bay to begin with.

"Depends, are they red?"

"Yeah."

"Then they're friendli--"

"A blue zealot popped out of the fog of war, sir."

"SHOOT IT!"

"Can't."

"WHY?!"

"Out of range."

"IT'S LITERALLY 50 METRES IN FRONT OF YOU!!"

"Still, out of range."

"God f... Flaming attack!"

"Son we ain't got no Hellions." A marauder stated.

"On the contrary," Another marine interrupted, "The commander wants us to remind our enemy that he's a gaywad and a dickwee casual." As he said this, another person near the Command Center was already sending the message through a computer.

"Well... What does that do?" The marauder asked.

"It just pisses them off. Visual intimidation!" Mike ordered.

The entire force of marines and marauders supported by medivacs, nicknamed 'Bioball', began arranging themselves to form an odd shape when looked from above. A certain phallic member.

"Why are we doing this again?" A marine asked. Mike only shrugged.

"Protoss forces advancing on our position!" A medivac yelled through the radio. Out of the fog of war a great number of zealots, archons and stalkers popped out, later followed by the mighty Mothership.

"Mothership!!" Mike screamed. "Stimpacks! Spread out! Focus fi--" Before he could even complete his orders the Mothership casted a Vortex spell on the force of marines and marauders, clustered together. Every single one of them was sucked in, with Mike desperately clinging to the floor but being sucked in despite his efforts. Not a second later, the entire protoss force hurled themselves into the vortex too. Only the mothership remained outside.

"...Well this sucks." Mike ranted, stuck inside the Vortex with his and his opponent's forces. No fighting occurred. "Okay, a few more seconds and we Leeroy everything..." He meditated as he looked at his visor's clock. "Aaaany... Second now..."

The rift began stuttering, as if it froze in place and moved again, until it froze completely and stopped moving.

"...Oh come on!! Is that Protoss gonna drop now?!"

Three hours later...

A marine, a marauder, a stalker, a zealot, an archon and Mike sat next to a giant round table that appeared out of nowhere playing poker.

"Boom!" Mike exclaimed as he placed four aces on the table, the winning hand. The marauder and the marine slapped their foreheads in annoyance. The zealot threw his cards away. The stalker blinked out of existence. The archon, furious, grabbed the table and flipped it towards Mike, though it harmlesly bounced off him without making him even flinch, then off the marine, then off the marauder, and so on due to being immune to damage, physics, laws of thermodynamics, lawyers and 'balancing' patches in the vortex. Then, on a board where Mike's and his opponent's names were written, a 'Drop' button appeared all of a sudden.

"Finally..." Mike sighed in relief. He punched the 'Drop' button thinking it'd make his opponent disconnect and grant him a quick victory, though he was surprised to say the least once he saw everything stuttering like a TV signal in the 80's. Then, it all turned white, blinding him, and sending him somewhere... Stranger.

"Once upon a time..."

"CUT TO THE POINT!" Mike yelled at the female narrator.

He appeared in an overly colourful, bright and lively night, though he couldn't see where due to the tiny detail that the upper half of his body was literally buried into the ground, while his legs remained above-ground. Something, however, suddenly touched one of his power armor's legs.

"...What's this thing?" Twilight Sparkle questioned in utter dumbfoundness as she examined the strange two-legged inversed 'plant'.

"Hmph hph mhp, hpmh hhmhmph hphm." Mike actually tried saying 'Don't touch me, you filthy casual.', though being half underground certainly limited his speech.

"It talks?!"

"Hmph phm hmpp phm?! (Who you calling 'It'?!)"

"It talks, so..." She couldn't understand one word of what he was saying. "Are you stuck?"

"Hmph. (I'd appreciate if you could somehow get me out of here, I am not in the most comfortable of positions and I'd most likely die of asphyxiation should my oxygen levels drop enough. Naturally, I cannot get out of here by myself seeing as my arms are immobile.)"

By sheer coincidence, Twilight had the idea of using her levitation magic to try and get the poor soul out of the ground. With great effort she managed to slowly but steadily undig him, levitating him until he was out of the ground upside down with pieces of dirt falling off his suit, giving a thumbs up. She was petrified to say the least.

"Appreciated." Mike said.

Twilight's jaw was as open as it could get, speechless.

"Well hello hello." Mike tried striking up a conversation with the statue-like pony. Considering he saw many weird, strange, mind crushing things like the fabric of time being twisted, vortexes opened at will, and entire strategies being changed by a voice in the sky saying "Thou shalt not do X thing by our commandment.", and by commandment actually meaning patch that Protoss, Zerg and Terrans alike followed to the end of their lives, even if it meant their destruction one way or the other, he wasn't surprised to see a talking coloured pony with a horn on its forehead capable of using magic.

Twilight, seeing as the strange creature acted as if everything was alright, thought that maybe she just didn't know of its existence beforehand. Manticores, cockatrices, hydras, windigos, anyone who saw them for the first time would question everything. "...Uh huh... What are you?" She asked, skeptical.

"Mike, a Terran. You?"

"...Twilight Sparkle. A... Unicorn."

"Twilight!!" Spike yelled in the distance. "Hurry up!!"

"Alright listen, I don't have much time." Twilight explained to Mike. "Can you just follow me so I ask a few questions later? I don't think I'll be able to find you again if you wander off..."

Mike shrugged in approval, to which Twilight stopped levitating him, making him fall to the same hole he arrived in. She apologized and lifted him again, placing him on firm ground. Now, both him and her rushed to the Town Hall, with Mike clumsily running with the clank of his armor echoing in the night as he tried to dust off the dirt.

Once arriving, everyone stared at them only for a few seconds before shrugging it off. Twilight was the one who made a dragon grow the size of a castle in a split second and revert it, so anything that was related to her was not that surprising even if it meant something that nobody would even manage to understand at all.

"Twilight, who's your new friend?" Spike asked.

"Well--"

"Fillies and gentlecolts, as mayor of Ponyville it is my great pleasure to announce the beginning--"

"Get to the point already!!" Mike yelled. Though he was utterly ignored for some strange reason.

"--Of the summer sun celebration!!"

Everyone in the room began cheering.

"In just a few moments, our town will witness the magic of the sunrise--"

"I've seen suns going supernova and y'all get hyped up for a sunrise?!"

"--And celebrate this, the longest day of the year! And now, it is my great honor to introduce to you the ruler of our land--"

"Arcturus Mengsk or nothing!!"

"--The very pony who gives us the sun and the moon each and every day--"

"Boo!"

"--The good, the wise, the bringer of harmony to all of Equestria--"

"The casual!!"

"--Princess Celestia!!"

Rarity raised the curtains that would reveal the Princess behind them, though everyone was surprised that noone was behind them.

"...This... Can't be good..." Twilight said to herself.

Out of the place where Princess Celestia would have been, a dark blue fog made its entrace. "Oh no..." Twilight whispered. The fog dissipated, revealing a black pony with dark blue armor pieces on equipped. "Nightmare Moon...!"

"Shit just got real... I think." Mike spoke, judging by the reactions of everyone around.

"Oh, my beloved subjects." Nightmare Moon spoke. "It's been so long since since I've seen your precious, little, sun-loving faces."

"Yo, what's going on?" Mike asked Twilight, though his question was ignored.

"What did you do with our Princess?!" Rainbow Dash violently asked.

"Why, am I not royal enough for you? Don't you know who I am?" Nightmare Moon retorted. "Does my crown no longer count now that I have been imprisoned for a thousand years? Did you not recall the legend? Did you not see the signs?"

"I did. And I know who you are. You're the Mare in the Moon – Nightmare Moon!" Twilight spoke.

"Well well well, somepony who remembers me. Then you also know why I'm here."

"You're here to... to..."

Nightmare Moon chuckled a bit before speaking. "Remember this day, little ponies, for it was your last. From this moment forth, the night will last forever!" As she finished, furious thunderstorms covered the skies, almost sending a pony into an epileptic fit.

"Meh, I've seen better from a Protoss High Templar." Mike gave his opinion with his arms crossed.

Chapter 2: Friendship is Psionic

AKA Marine in the moon AKA Elements of Armory

Previously, in Of Archon Toilets and Bioballs...

Archon toilet sends Mike to Equestria.

...

That's pretty much it.

My little pony~ My little--

"NO!"

"Is this supposed to be a psionic storm or something?" Mike asked as he pointed at the thunderbolts and the small whirlwind of dark smoke created by Nightmare Moon above him. "I've heard people saying Psionic Storms were weak but... This is just embarrassing."

"Seize her! Only she knows where the princess is!" Mayor Mare exclaimed. Immediately, three royal guards flew towards Nightmare Moon, only to be shot off by thunder. Mike just bursted out laughing not because of the misfortune of the guards, but because the thunder did no damage at all appart from distracting them as she escaped.

"Man, saying that this was an embarrassement was an understatement..." Mike could barely speak as he cleaned the laughing tear off his cheek. "You're all pretty cool, you know that?" He failed to understand the gravity of the situation.

Twilight ran off the building as Mike laughed. Seeing as she was the only one he knew here he decided to follow her pace to wherever she went. Her house.

"Elements, elements, elements... Ugh!! How can I stop Nightmare Moon without the Elelements of Harmony?!"

"Nightmare Moon? So that's what that oversized black swan is called?" Mike asked, just lying on the floor resting.

"And just what are the Elements of Harmony?!" Rainbow Dash violently asked as she flew towards Twilight.

"How the HELL did you get in here--" Mike asked before being ignored and interrupted.

"And how did you know about Nightmare Moon, huh?" Rainbow Dash continued. "Are you a spy?!"

"Alright, I'm out. Enjoy your fancy hocus pocus while I try to figure out what the hell is going on around here." Mike ranted as he stood up and left the house, leaving his silhouette on the floor by sheer weight of his armor.

"Okay so..." Mike said to himself as he scratched his visor outside Twilight's house. "Normally when I'm deployed wherever it is, I get a Command Center and 6 SCVs... And by sheer coincidence a mineral patch and two vespene geysers where I start. Even more coincidence there are more places like that scattered around too. Hmmmm..." He shrugged to himself and began circling Twilight's house, until he peeked from the side to the back of the house. There it layed eight mineral patches and two vespene geysers, as if the mysterious things followed him around to his benefit. "Is good." He began walking towards it until he was where a Command Center would be placed, standing as he stared around. "Ok, all I need is a Command Center right here... And a few SCVs. Now, how am I supposed to get them here if I don't have any SCVs and minerals to begin with? Uhhh... Oh right, I'm new to this place." He walked a few steps away and clapped his hands. Magically, a Command Center and six SCVs appeared as he blinked, as if they were there all along yet not a few seconds ago. "Woohoo!" He said as he threw his arms up in the air as several SCVs harvested the minerals, an SCV finishing a supply depot, and then immediately start building the first barracks. "Say, I don't have any Zerg, Terran or Protoss opponent here.. What am I supposed to do?" he loudly thought. "Wait, I think Nightmare whatever she's called is the opponent of these pastel-coloured talking equines. Meh, might as well make it my opponent too."

"It is said, the last known location of the five elements was in the ancient castle of the royal pony sisters." Twilight spoke to her friends while outside the window a dark, shadowy fog silently stared inside. That fog turned away and floated to an unknown direction, though its action could also be confused as running away since Mike and no less than a hundred terran marines began shooting and chasing it.

"You cannot run forever!!" Mike screamed insanely loud as he clinged to a marine's back. "Get over here!!" The shots and scream of every single marine echoed in the night, waking everyone up and making them look out of the window to see what the ruckus is about, only to immediately shut their windows as stray bullets destroyed windows, clothes set to dry outside, trees, plants, doors, and almost hitting Lyra in the face. Though she didn't even flinch, she was just heartcrushingly staring at the hundred creatures which had hands. Every single one of them, with hands.

They kept on chasing for kilometres and kilometres, not realizing the entire force had entered the Everfree Forest. They all left great footsteps on the ground due to their incredible weight, somehow not running out of ammo even though they shot all their way here. Anyone would say they'd have already emptied the entire US arsenal by now. Following the fog, they ran and ran a great distance, until they reached a cliff. Normally anyone would stop but the force kept running until half of it fell to their deaths below.

"Dammit." Mike ranted as he threw his rifle to the floor, reaching a dead end. As the heavy rifle impacted the ground, great cracks could be seen and heard on the ground. Everyone knew what was going to happen. "Nobody move a muscle!" Mike ordered as he threw his arms in the air. The situation became stressful, the cracks stopped growing but they were forced to be immobile, Mike already sweating his heart out. A drop of sweat travelled his forehead, and then cheek, falling off his head and striking the ground. Apparently it was enough weight to make the cliff outright break appart, sending everyone down below as they screamed.

"God f..." Mike almost said, holding his head in pain. "The hell was that?" He yelled. Later, a group of ten marines appeared in the distance and walked up to him, they were fresh marine reinforcements from the barracks behind Twilight's house, who immediately dog piled on the poor commander. "Nonononowaitdontdotha-- AUGH-- GAH-- AEGH-- PAINPAINPAIN-- AAAGH--". After it cleared out, he stood up and dusted off his armor. "Damned rally points... Next time I won't set myself as a rally point... Anyone seen that fog?"

A marine pointed forward.

"Thanks chum. Move!" He ordered the force that were now the same size as before thanks to the reinforcements. They walked down a path until they reached something in the distance, though not close enough to be seen. Mike stepped forward and turned to his force. "Alright, we're about to meet something unkown. Everyone knows the protocols? Ok, what if it's a hostile?"

A marine raised his hand.

"Yes?"

"We shoot it."

"Perfect. What if it's neutral?"

Another marine raised his hand. "We shoot it."

"Splendid. And if it's a friendly?"

Yet another marine raised his hand. "We shoot it."

"That's the spirit. And if it's just a rock?"

"We shoot it out of the way." Everyone said in unison.

"You all make me so proud..." Mike said as he cleared a tear off his cheek. "Forward!"

The force moved forward until the object could be seen clearly. A manticore. Obviously Mike had no idea what it was. Everyone prepared their guns towards it and Mike prepared to give the order, though his mind changed as the manticore woke up and charged towards the force.

"Run for your lives!!" Mike screamed. The entire force scrambled. Shots and screams deafened and blinded anyone for hours, until somehow Mike and a small force managed to lose the beast. Hell knows what happened to the rest. Another batch of marine reinforcements arrived, apparently they were more like cannon fodder than true soldiers.

"Well, we managed to get out of that one with our limbs intact..." A marine said as they all kept on walking. "I don't-- Wait... Oh man, did I step on sh--" He was cut short by the image of furious and horrifying trees surrounding them, who would send anyone insane. The force kept silent with their faces straight, they didn't even shoot their rifles, only stared.

But not a second later the entire marine force screamed for their lives even louder than with the manticore, unloading their rifles with enough power to cut down an entire forest, this forest, if it wasn't for the fact that they just blindly shot their guns to the air, ground, and everything inbetween.

Mike crawled out of the forest with several marines running like little girls shooting around. He was panting, petrified, seeing horrors that no man should have ever seen. His mind was scarred, horrified, crushed, traumatized... But then he got better.

"Jesus, just what are these things..." He asked himself.

"Sir, obstacle in sight. The fog went that way." A marine said as he pointed to a turbulent river.

"A river... Seems easy enough." He said as he stood up and cleaned the mud off his armor. "Source of the turmoil?"

"A fabulously flamboyant sea serpent with half a moustache, sir. Shall we deal with it?"

"Nah, I got a better idea." He said. He then walked right up to the river and stared at it for a moment, before coming up with a plan. A masterplan. A plan with no flaw whatsoever, which not even Machiavelli or Sun Tzu would even dare to question. "Forward!!"

The entire marine force blindly rushed towards the river, sinking and experiencing an already obvious fate. The force kept charging and charging, hundreds and hundreds of marines throwing their lives away as if this was something out of the Imperial Guard of Warhammer 40k. "Keep moving!" Mike yelled, just standing there as he saw the great marine migration. Soon enough the amount of corpses piled up and made a makeshift bridge for him to cross. "This is the smartest plan I've ever made." He boasted as he crossed the 'bridge'.

The force kept walking, with marine reinforcements reaching them until it became the same size they started with. They walked and walked until they reached a cliff with a bridge, and on the other side, the Ancient castle of the royal pony sisters. "Finally!" Mike sighed in relief. "Forward, men!"

The marines began crossing the bridge, but the heavy weight made it collapse and sending the ones who were crossing it to the depths below. "God f..." Mike ranted. Now only half a bridge remained, supported by a single rope.

"Should we get transport?" A marine asked.

"I've got a better idea..."

A ridiculously high tower of marines who sat on top of each other's shoulder rose from the woods, desperately trying to keep balance, complaining as loud as their voice allowed, until it charged forward and threw itself on the division. Ridiculously enough, the plan was successful. A makeshift bridge was created. Mike and the force crossed it, but as soon as Mike reached the other side the bridge collapsed sending everyone to the depths below. Now only Mike remained, except for five flying barracks that flew towards him, landed next to him and began pumping marines once again. "Job well done." He said as he patted himself on the back.

"Rainbow~" A voice echoed in the mist.

"Who's there?" Mike heard Rainbow Dash asking. Trying to figure out where she was, he walked back to the bridge the mist covered. He was out of sight, but he could see Rainbow looking around confused. "I ain't scared of you, show yourself!"

"We've been eagerly awaiting the arrival of the best flier in Equestria..."

"Who?"

"Why, you of course."

"Really?! I-I mean, oh yeah, me!"

Mike rubbed his nose bridge at still not understand half of the stuff that was going on, and instead focusing himself on actually figuring out what to do next.

"No, Rainbow Dash, we want you to join *us*... The Shadowbolts."

Mike's not-so-bright mind saw the dark blue colours that reminded him of the fog, and with the snap of his mechanized fingers, he gave an order.

No less than 20 marines clad in steel power armor jumped out of the fog and ganged up on the three Shadowbolts, punching them into submission hard enough to make them turn into a certain dark blue fog. The marines kept punching whatever was left with such brutality that they ended up digging themselves to the ground, yet they didn't stop. Rainbow Dash was dumbfounded.

"Well hello there." Mike greeted Rainbow Dash while his marines punched the earth hard enough to dig to China. Or whatever the Equestria equivalent of it would be.

"W-wha...?" She tried returning to reality, until she snapped out of her trance by the remindal that she had to tie the rope. She tied it, and once she turned back to Mike and his force of a hundred marines, she returned to her trance once again. The mane six crossed the bridge cheering for her, only to enter the trance as well once they saw Mike and his force.

"H-h-how the-- when-- Where did all those 'Terrans' come from?!" Twilight thought Mike was the only Terran she knew. He only shrugged.

"Well... You put around 50 minerals in that building behind me and... That building flashes... And... A marine just appears. I dunno."

"..."

"..."

"So... Nightmare Moon..." Mike tried changing the topic.

"...Right..."

The seven of them awkwardly walked inside the Ancient castle of the royal etc., seeing before them a giant structure with the five elements of harmony in each arm. Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash, one by one, carried down the great stones to the floor in front of Twilight Sparkle.

"One, two, three, four... There's only five." Pinkie Pie stated.

"Where's the sixth?" Rainbow Dash asked.

Mike just hummed an old country song to himself without a care in the world as he ignored what the ponies were saying, figuring it was their business and he'd not understand anything anyways. After a while he saw that everyone but Twilight was leaving the building.

"Uhhh... Ponies?" He tried asking as he turned to the door, not understanding why they were leaving, nor why Twilight remained. But in the shadows, out of everyone's sight but his, he saw a dark blue fog rising, and somehow hear a dramatic chord ringing in his head as if it was part of the scene. "ROIGHT DEN, UP AN' AT 'EM, BOYZ!!" He screamed at the top of his lungs, aiming his gun at the fog and shooting, frightening Twilight. At this moment Terran Marines flooded in from the door, broke through the windows, rappelled down the roof, and tactically threw themselves to the ground through a hole in the ceiling. Hundreds upon hundreds of red-coloured terrans screaming gibberish as if they were drunk shooting at a strange cloud, drowning every single sound that might occur.

The fog kept moving towards the Elements. Marines climbing up the walls to get a better line of fire, others ninja-ing the structure to strategically redeploy at the cloud's position, and others just blasting death metal out of their suits. This is exactly the kind of stuff that'd happen if you gave an army gratuitous amounts of alcohol and guns, and worse yet, it seemed as if they'd never run out of ammo.

The fog became a whirlwind, marines throwing themselves at it and being caught in the tornado until it became a tornado made entirely out of marines and bullets, mostly bullets, until it shrunk and teleported somewhere else. The marines who remained broke through the walls chasing it. Needless to say the ponies who were outside already knew something bad was happening as part of the castle crumbled upon itself.

In another part of the castle, several marines, Mike, Twilight and the dark blue fog appeared, the fighting continuing upon every inch of the room. Bullets and gibberish flew side by side.

"INCOMING!"

"WE NEED A DETECTOR!!"

"THERE ARE NO CLOAKED UNITS YOU DUMB FUCK!"

The gibberish became incomprehensible at this point as bullets and bodies flew left and right, until all of a sudden three flying barracks embeded themselves to the wall of the castle, breaking through and pumping marines as the building flashed like a rave moshpit.

Nightmare Moon materialized right in a corner of the room, with the Elements of Harmony beside her. Every single marine in the room began stabbing her with bullets to no effect, she didn't even flinch.

"WHAT THE HELL IS THAT THING?!" A marine yelled.

"AN OVERSIZED BLACK SWAN, RETARD!! WHAT ELSE!?"

"THAT THING HAS 'INVINCIBLE' TRAIT! IT DOESNT EVEN HAVE HITPOINTS!!"

"KEEP SHOOTING!! WE'LL DROWN THAT THING WITH BULLETS AND BODIES!!"

The death metal and screams became louder and louder, with even more barracks kamikaze-ing themselves to the building. It was like the Battle of Stalingrad in WW2 seen through the eyes of a guy ODing in LSD and vodka.

A stray bullet, or to be more specific, around several hundred thousand stray bullets struck the Elements of Harmony, destroying them. Everyone stopped shooting and just looked at the mess.

"Whoops..." Everyone said in unison before blasting death metal and bullets again. Lead production sure skyrocketed that day. Or night.

"Hahahaha!" Nightmare Moon laughed to herself as she flew around the room dodging the falling debris and parts of the ceiling, not realizing Mike was clinging on her back with his cheeks almost tearing appart due to the wind of such speed.

He could not only say anything coherent, only gibberish mixed with pain of his mouth being distorted by the wind.

Not after long, however, Twilight began speaking, though the sound drowned her voice so Mike couldn't hear her. Then, Nightmare Moon suddenly stopped moving, sending Mike into a wall due to the inertia. He flipped the finger at her as he laid upside down in a corner. What caught his attention, however, were the shards of the destroyed Elements of Harmony gathering around five of the six pastel-coloured talking small equines. Then, they lit up, blinding everyone in the room and reappearing as a necklace on each one, and a crown on Twilight. Immediately thereafter, a rainbow was shot out of the group, aimed towards Nightmare Moon herself, who could only yell before she was struck. Twilight's eyes lit completely white, before a blinding light once again struck everyone.

"Augh... My head..." Rainbow Dash complained.

"Everypony alright...?" Applejack asked just to be sure.

"I'm not." Mike said with excruciating pain in his voice, just before a big bad ball of marines fell on top of him, knocking him out. The entire marine force in the room and outside was dead.

By their own stray bullets.

What a shame.

"I, Princess Celestia, hereby decree that the unicorn Twilight Sparkle shall take on a new mission for Equestria. She must continue to study the magic of friendship. She must report to me her findings from her new home in Ponyville."

Everyone began cheering, with the mane 6 grouping together to share the happiness.

"Thank you Princess Celestia, I'll study harder than ever before!" Twilight said with extreme joy.

"BEEP BEEP SUCKAS, GOLDEN EXPANSION IN SIGHT." Mike yelled as he rode a flying Command Center dangerously close to the surface, with a flying barracks and a flying factory following his lead.

"...What's that thing?" Both Luna and Celestia asked in unison.