A date with a pink pony

by TAW

Rating: mature
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Romance, Pinkie Pie, Sex
Length: 3369

2nd Person Human x Pony Waiffufaggotry goo

Because sometimes people experiment with different styles of writing, and sometimes it fails horribly because they aren't a good enough writer, but they figure they may as well post it anyway because let's be honest, perfect grammar isn't why you're considering reading this anyway.

Published 2012-01-08 05:21:26 UTC
Last updated 2012-01-08 05:21:26 UTC

Chapter 1

Picnic of Two

It's autumn, and the leaves are starting to go a crisp golden brown, indicating that it's almost time to knock them down and begin the yearly cycle of nature once more - but that's not for a week or so yet. The event, though, was in my mind, due to the pink pony presiding over it. She'd been making plans for weeks prior, from talking Twilight into letting her borrow the balloon again (After Pinkie-Pie-Swearing she wouldn't bring it back filled with cake crumbs like last time) to laboring over her script for hours on end. Most people think she makes it up on the spot, and most of the time she does, but she takes her announcing seriously. She made me swear not to tell anyone before she told me - just thinking back to that day forced a smile to my face, remembering her whispering me over across the counter of Sugarcube Corner and into her bedroom, before closing the door and checking the windows to make sure nopony was looking in, and making me promise not to tell a soul. When I asked about what, she wouldn't tell me - it was a secret. Of course it was. After I agreed, she pulled out a thick volume and set it down in front of me, paging through it with her nose until she reached this year's chapter, and asked me what I thought. They were a mix of brilliant puns for unlikely events (Though knowing Pinkie, there's more it than that) and some natural banter between her and her co-host, Spike. It was brilliant, and I told her so, and the grin on her face became larger than I ever thought physically possible.

That's something Pinkie always managed - to smile so wide it couldn't help but become contagious. That was one of, if not the, reason I agreed to meet her over her lunch hour. Rarity could be difficult, depending on stress, or just getting up on the wrong side of the bed. Applejack is always fun, but only if she has free time. Lyra and Bon-bon (For they're almost never seen apart) are almost always good for a laugh, but it's hard to escape the feeling of being a third wheel. Roseluck can be fun, but say one wrong word and she's as likely to be hiding in her house as she is running in panic. Not Pinkie, though - Pinkie Pie is always great, and I always looked forward to visits to Sugarcube Corner, because no matter how busy she was, she'd always make time to have a conversation, and she'd always have a big, goofy grin on her face, like all her Christmases came at once. Every time. Something about that energy always appealed to me, that childlike happiness that wasn't tempered by reality, or corrupted by cynicism, as mine had been so many years ago. In her company, though, the problems of the world suddenly seem so much further away.

Lost in thought, I didn't notice the pink smudge rushing towards me until it was too late, and she'd knocked me to the floor, unable to stop herself until it was too late. "Hi", she beamed, smiling that innocent smile, with those wide, hopeful eyes, "Come on, I've got the picnic set up in the park!"

Then she was gone, just a blur heading for Ponyville's largest park. I never was sure how she did it, but she can go fast enough to make Rainbow Dash jealous at times. Certainly more than fast enough to well outpace me. A brisk walk though Ponyville brought me to the park quickly enough, though - the architecture that normally fascinated me so seeming far less important. Issues of why a pony would design something that worked so well with hands taking a back seat to catching up with Her.

Clambering onto the top of the small hill, slightly puffing, as the brisk jog through Ponyville is more exercise than I normally went for, I found Pinkie sitting on the edge of the chequered blanket, a large basket lying in the center. Behind her was a tree, one of the larger ones in the town (Though nowhere near the largest - Twilight's house), casting a short shadow down over the blanket. As I sat down on the other side, she poked the basket open with a hoof, and smiled as the balloons within flew out and came to a comfortable hover over the basket. Oh, Pinkie. I give her a laugh anyway, it was certainly unexpected. What else is unexpected is that instead of her usual wider grin, and a bounce in her step, she blushed, before hiding it by burying her head in the basket and retrieving the various baked goods she'd brought along for the trip.

Luckily for Pinkie, the cakes, buns, biscuits, and treats were delicious enough to take my mind off of her for a moment as I watched her set them out onto various plates. All in all, there was far more inside that basket than there should be, especially given how she managed to fit her entire head in earlier. I chalked it up to Pinkie being Pinkie, something it took me months of knowing her to get used to. Twilight told me a similar story - Pinkie and the scientifically minded don't really mix until we can learn that she's a bit special, and luckily, I found her fascinating to watch, whether it be seeing her jump around town, or watching any number of her body parts wiggle. Both with and without her knowing, watching her was always an acceptable substitute for doing other things.

However, this time, she wouldn't make do with silent watching - she only has an hour for her lunch (Not that it's enforced, or that the Cakes really care, but she hated the idea of taking advantage of the ponies who'd been so dear to her) - and instead had a plan. A Pinkie-plan, complete with notes and a script, one she hadn't gotten me to look over. Sitting down, a wall of cakes between me and her, she cleared her throat and began to read. "I really kinda super like you like a friend but more than a friend well I'd like to be more than a friend but it's okay if you don't and I baked all these for you or for us if you want and I wrote a script! But this has to come from the heart and I can't do that from a script so...", she takes a breath as she shows me the blank sheets of paper, "I really super duper like you, kinda like Mrs. Cake super likes Mr. Cake... do you like me like Mrs. Cake?", she burst out with, before looking at me with the widest, most hopeful eyes I'd ever seen from her.

Thinking over her words in a stunned silence, she begins to make a little more sense. The way her smile always grew as I walked into the room - I'd always wondered how she managed to do that for everybody without actually breaking her face, and now I know. It's not everybody. The way she'd always make time for a conversation - how could she get any work done if she was being interrupted for half an hour every 5 minutes? It's not everybody. It's just me. Why was I allowed to see her scripts? I know that one too, now.

Similarly, I started to make a bit more sense. She wasn't fascinating, she was beautiful. And fascinating. And a lot of other things besides. It wasn't just that her smile was infectious, her happiness in general always rubbed off on me, far more-so than it does on most others. She reminds me of me, back when I was young, when I could look at a flower on the ground and think of how pretty it was, not the cruelty of nature that allows it to prosper. I still can't, but I can look at Pinkie while she does, and I see no cruelty there. No malice, no ill intent, no self-centered egotism or ulterior motives. Just Pinkie Pie. She's beautiful, in mind, and in body, and I'd be her Mr. Cake any day. Of course, the moment I opened my mouth to tell her, she already knew.

"Pinkie, I-unf" is all that escaped my mouth as she quickly pounced over the berliner wall, hitting me like a cotton candy freight train and knocking the air out of my lungs as I hit the ground, with her lying on top of me, her forelegs wrapped around my neck and her mouth kissing me. As soon as I'd noticed that, I started to return it, meeting her tongue halfway and tasting her flavours - a mix of saliva, sugar, frosting, and sweets. Kinda delicious. Unfortunately, I needed air, I didn't want to black out and ruin her picnic, so I had to push her off and start to gasp for breath.

"What's wro- oh, whoopsie, sorry!", she said with honest apology in her voice, which I tried to wave off with my hand, but her smile drooped anyway. "I didn't mean to hurt you! I'm sorry ponies are harder to hurt but I should have known I'd never hurt you I swear, cross my hooves and hope to-", she monologues without pause until my hand found the nearest treat and jammed it in her mouth. Sweet silence, followed by a curious sensation on my fingertips as she quickly chews through the treat and starts to nibble on my fingers, licking off the crumbs and frosting that'd fallen onto them, with a grin on her face and a mean look in her eyes.

I got the idea, and with a similar grin, grabbed Pinkie with one hand, and the nearest plate with another. She squealed an excited "Woo!" as I pulled her to my chest, flipping her around so that my arm was under her forelegs as she rested on top of me, her head falling on my chest. My other hand busied itself in finding the stickiest, most frosting filled bun there, as I grabbed it in my palm and forced it into Pinkie's mouth, her muffled moan of approval somehow an even more appealing sound than her previous giggles. Again, she got through the delicious confectionery in no time, but this time she took more care on the hand, running her tongue down each finger in turn, flicking it in between them and round them to gather everything present, before cleaning the palm in a single, long, slow lick. Then she giggled again, the sound still music to my ears - but no substitute for an untempered moan.

The now tried and tested method of feeding her didn't fail to produce it again, either, her body relaxing into my arms as she closed her eyes and began to chew, only getting halfway through before I'd brought another cupcake to bear, and pushed it at her, prompting an even louder moan, and a slower chew, while her tail began to flick back and forth across my legs, tickling them as she wriggled in my arm. Another cupcake, and then another, always making sure to keep her mouth full, Pinkie clearly enjoying it as she shivered in joy at the sensation of my hand at her mouth, the feeling of her body on my skin, unfortunately tempered by my clothes, was unreasonably... sensational, prompting an immense pressure in my pants to grow. Pinkie, of course, didn't notice a thing, her worldview having collapsed to include nothing but me, her, and cupcakes. At least, it did until the plate was empty and there was nothing left for me to feed her, and with her lying on top of me, I was in no position to reach anything else, so I raised my cupcaking arm up and completed my hug, holding her close while she finished off her snacks.

After her final swallow, she let loose a sigh - the only time I'd ever heard that from her - and wriggled around to hug me back, but got distracted halfway by the food remaining out of my reach. Upon seeing it, she gained a devious grin, and pulled herself free of my embrace to grab the plate and bring it over - clearly she wanted more feeding. "Just hold still", I told her, "I'll do thi-"

Just as I'd shut her up, she shut me up, taking a frosted good in her mouth, and jumping forward to push it down into mine, her less precise tools resulting in her getting frosting all over her face. I got the picture, we'd switched places, so after finishing, which took me much longer than it took her, I grabbed her head in my hands, and pulled her forward to give her a big, wet lick, scraping the sugary goodness straight off of her furry surface, the gigglesnort only inspiring me to lick ever harder, having to make a downward pass to un-ruffle her hairs and catch the last remaining frosting. Being fed cupcakes didn't get me any closer to hearing Pinkie's voice, though, and while I was hungry, it wasn't for food, so I used her disarmed stance to quickly pull her to my mouth for another kiss, this one far more energetic and passionate, and catching Pinkie unaware as she gasped into my mouth before returning the action.

Just a gasp is not enough, though - my realization that I loved her - I wanted to shout it from the rooftops, if there were any to shout it from - brought with it a desire to make her shout in pleasure. Seemed like as good a target as any, so I rolled over, taking her with me, until she was pinned on the ground beneath me, unable to move partially due to being stuffed full of cupcakes, and partially due to my weight pressing down on her. Pulling away from my mouth, I began to kiss her neck, slowly moving down her body as her giggles turned to light moans as my lips brushed against her skin, moving down across her belly as she shivered beneath me. Further down still, navigating my head between her pert breasts, getting closer and closer to my main target in the mission to make her scream.

Which she came close to as I plunged my tongue into the slit in her body - its pinkness almost invisible against her regular pinkness, and its taste a sweet cotton candy - as she bit her lip just a moment too late to avoid a loud, instinctual gasp. Not enough, she was still resisting, which only prompted me to dig deeper, running my tongue from the bottom of her folds to the top, as her sweet liquids started to seep through her coat, making its location far more obvious, and my job even easier, as my tongue found her clitoris and her self-muffled moans became audible, and stayed that way. Deciding to take that as my cue to keep going, I started to massage her flanks with my hands, rubbing over her cutie marks, feeling her silky fur under my fingertips and her warm skin just through it.

Growing impatient with my progress, her light moaning remaining at a constant low level, I raised my head out of the way and brought a hand up to her, working two fingers in, and, emboldened by the startled, high pitched gasp, attempted a third, her juices providing more than enough lubrication for the task as I began to work in and out, Pinkie's lip becoming unbitten as she began to moan unrestricted, her adorable noises timed to the thrusts of my hand as I held a steady rhythm in and out, cupping one of breasts with my other hand and massaging it, using her own liquids to reduce friction and heighten her pleasure as her moans translated into gasps and pants as she struggled to vocalize a short command: "S- ah! N...nngngggg, ah, oh! STOP!"

So I did, as she lay there panting, the effort of a single word pushing her to her limits, until she rolled over and struggled to her hooves, her tail holding itself up out of the way, her arousal overriding many of her conscious decisions as she jumped at the bulge in my trousers, struggling with the zipper as she pulled at it, only stopping when she noticed my willing hands begin to open them in front of her, my erection bouncing out towards her as I remove my underwear, her mouth shifting into an "ooh" of curiosity as her eyes light up, her lust-addled mind fixed on her pleasure, and her selfless personality means that included mine, too. I already knew what her tongue could do, but nothing could have prepared me for the sensation of her wrapping her mouth around my penis, her tongue rubbing over the entire surface at once, taking all of my willpower to not ejaculate there and then, as her wet, warm, slippery tongue ran up and down my length.

Hearing my increasingly sharp gasps, Pinkie pulls her head away, a few thin strings of saliva and precum arcing between the tip and her mouth, before they break into nothingness as she twists her body around, bending her forehooves to rest the front of her body on the ground and raise her hindquarters into the air, wiggling her behind invitingly as her tail twitches upwards, revealing herself with ever more enthusasm. Not needing to be asked, I quickly guided myself in, gripping her flanks with my hands, and starting to thrust, slowly at first, but - prompted by her rhythmical moaning - speeding up until I kept a steady pattern, punctuated by the squelch of skin on soaked through fur, followed shortly by a shout, her inhibitions leaving her as she started to moan and scream into the dirt, the ground muffling her high pitched, adorable yelps of pleasure.

Confident in my grip, I reached forward and grabbed her mane, pulling her head off the ground, and revealing her full volume, as her body began to quake, starting at her upper body and working its way down until, with a scream that left the birds fleeing the trees in terror, she came, the contractions on my penis quickly bringing me down with her as our legs gave way at the same time, our joint ecstasy lasting what seemed to be minutes, as I lay there on top of her, all I could feel was pink, all I could hear was her deep, happy breaths, and all I could think about was... sweet nothings.

Eventually, at some point later, I drifted back into consciousness to find Pinkie smiling up at me. Seeing her at her most animalistic hadn't made her any less beautiful, and the wide, true smile on her face relayed the same message back to me. Looking around, I found Pinkie was lying against the tree - I couldn't remember whether we'd ended up there in the throws of passion, or wondering if Pinkie had dragged us there while I wasn't paying attention. Either way, she looked quite comfortable, and I couldn't help but join her, swinging my tired body round to lie next to her, before she snuggled up, resting her head on my chest and wrapping her tail around my legs.

I suddenly remembered that she was on lunch, and should probably be getting back, but as if she could read my mind (Well, it is Pinkie), she whispered "I told the Cakes you'd say yes, we have the rest of the day all to ourselves", and nuzzled closer to my neck, getting more comfortable, before she closed her eyes and her breathing started to slow, her tight hug growing weaker as she drifted off to sleep, the wide grin on her face shrinking to nothing more than a happy smile. Shortly after that, I followed her, though I'm sure any onlooker would agree - she was by far the most adorable of us.