A quiet sigh trailed through the air, escaping through a cottage’s open window. The plants that lined the window sill were tinged with the sun’s gentle glow. Outside, birds chirped sweet melodies with nary a care in the world, as if celebrating another warm day in Ponyville.
Inside, things were a bit different. The relaxed atmosphere still held, but cracks of tension were beginning to slip through.
Fluttershy sighed again, this time with relief, as she placed her work down on the table. She wiped her brow and dusted her hooves off, trying to admire the object that sat absently before her.
A plush toy stared back with curious button eyes. Well, Fluttershy hoped they looked curious, anyway. Button eyes sometimes looked dead to her, but she dared not think this plush could stare back without an expression. She shuddered at the thought, stroking the plush’s yellow mane affectionately. Her fur colour was lighter than the mane, but the two blended together so perfectly; yellow on yellow. It was like she was stroking the real thing...
“I don’t think you look too bad,” Fluttershy murmured to the toy. “Not as good as the real pony, but given the circumstances, I guess I did all right...”
She could have asked Rarity to sew her plush, but questions held her back, as usual. Could Rarity sew plush toys? Would Rarity agree to it? But most importantly – and it was inevitable that Rarity would ask this – why would she need to sew Fluttershy a plush toy of Applejack?
Fluttershy blushed at the thought. She regarded the Applejack plush with warmth, almost as much as she did for the real thing. No, that was wrong. Applejack wasn’t a thing. She was a pony, and she was the best pony Fluttershy had ever met. Honest and dependable, strong and independent, caring and protective...
Fluttershy closed her eyes and bit her lip, holding the plush closer to her, revelling in its soft touch. She could almost imagine that she was hugging Applejack. Almost.
Now she only had one task left to do, and it was arguably even harder than sewing the plushie together.
She had to give the plush toy to Applejack.
I can’t do that, Fluttershy thought, biting her lip. She could feel the heat rising in her cheeks again and winced. What would she say? Hello, Applejack. I, um, I thought you might like this toy I made of you, er, for you, um... She shook her head, sighing once more. I can’t even think it out properly. I’ll never be able to say it out loud.
With a little resigned groan, Fluttershy carefully picked up the plush toy. It was small enough that she could hold it in one hoof, with the head a little larger than the body, and it was missing its model’s signature Stetson. Yes, it was definitely not perfect. I should hide it, she thought. It would be bad for anypony to see it. They might ask questions. She got up and headed for the cupboard—
“Hi, Fluttershy!”
“Oh my goodness!” Fluttershy squeaked as she caught sight of a familiar pink head poking through the window. She blinked stupidly, cursing her luck. It was as if fate heard her and decided it had other plans for her. Or maybe it was just the pink mare’s Pinkie Sense that had alerted her to Fluttershy’s secret. Either way, this was a very inconvenient time for Pinkie Pie to show up.
“Oh! Sorry, Fluttershy, did I spook you?” Pinkie’s body joined her head as she clambered carelessly through the window, landing on the cottage floor with an audible thump. “I’m sorry, I – hey, is that an Applejack plushie?”
Blood rushed to Fluttershy’s face as she whipped the plush toy behind her back, her heart hammering in her chest. “No!” she lied, fighting pointlessly against Pinkie’s curiosity. It was so futile; Pinkie could be terrifyingly relentless about this sort of thing – but it was all Fluttershy could think to do.
“Aw, come on, Fluttershy, you don’t have to hide it,” Pinkie Pie pressed, sitting upright on the floor.
“H-hide what?” Fluttershy swallowed, painfully aware of how obvious she was. “I’m not hiding anything...”
“That plushie of Applejack!” Pinkie Pie frowned for a second, but brightened immediately as she went on, “Is it soft? Does it have the three apple cutie mark? Does it smell like apples? Hey, isn’t it weird how Applejack smells like apples? I wanna smell like apples...”
Fluttershy shook her head and inched towards the cupboard door, one hoof held out to open it. She had to wait for the right moment. Distract Pinkie, and then quickly throw the plush toy in the cupboard and close the door! Yes, that would work!
“Do you think Applejack uses some kind of special shampoo?” Pinkie continued, evidently lost in her own mind. “Maybe she smells like apples because of her cutie mark! Then again, I don’t smell like balloons. Balloons have that weird plasticy balloony smell and – Fluttershy, when did you paint your face red?”
Fluttershy’s face supposedly painted itself even redder as she realised she was caught. Her ears flattened and she cleared her throat. She had been so close. One more of Pinkie’s tangents and she would have been able to hide the plush toy, and her embarrassment along with it.
“You’re as red as – what’s the saying? Oh, oh! You’re as red as a tomato, that’s it!” Pinkie Pie bounced towards her friend, and Fluttershy could do nothing but cower by the cupboard, her back pressed against its door.
“Fluttershy, what’s up? Why the scared face? Am I scary? Aw, no, I don’t wanna be scary, and I don’t wanna scare you...” Pinkie Pie pulled away, but Fluttershy didn’t let up, keeping her back pressed firmly on the door.
The yellow pegasus blinked slowly. She thought she might have upset Pinkie by appearing so secretive, but Pinkie smiled as brightly as always, appearing anything but scary. “No, it’s not you,” Fluttershy admitted, exhaling deeply, still slumped against the door.
“It’s the Applejack plushie, isn’t it?” Pinkie asked. “You don’t want me to see it, right?”
Fluttershy raised her eyebrows, surprised by Pinkie’s attentiveness. Then again, she was being painfully obvious. She was so tempted to lie again – she could feel a protest dancing on her tongue – but what good would more lying do? Besides, Pinkie Pie was her friend. It was cruel to hide things from her. Fluttershy knew she would be hurt if Pinkie was hiding something from her. “I’m sorry,” the pegasus whispered.
Pinkie beamed again. “Aw, Fluttershy! You don’t have to hide it from me,” she repeated. “It looks great!”
Fluttershy felt the edges of her mouth curving upwards in a smile. Pinkie Pie always knew how to cheer her up. Yet however high Pinkie sang her praises, she could not believe the plush toy was great. Certainly not up to Applejack’s standard of great, and definitely nowhere near nice enough to be even remotely related to her. “Thank you, but...”
“Can I look at it?”
Fluttershy hesitated, horribly aware that her uncertainty – brief and accidental as it was – was extremely rude. So with a sigh she relaxed her muscles and extended her foreleg out to Pinkie, with the Applejack plush toy in plain view.
Pinkie Pie did not take it from her. Fluttershy watched carefully as the pink mare inched closer towards the toy, her blue eyes so wide they looked as though they might pop out of her head. She was so close that her snout gently bumped the plush’s.
“It’s so-so-so-so-so cute!” Pinkie Pie complimented. “I love its button eyes. They give it life!”
Fluttershy allowed herself to smile fully. It was interesting that Pinkie should address one of her concerns without even knowing she did, but such was to be expected from the odd pony. “Thank you,” she breathed gratefully.
“Are you going to give it to Applejack?”
A squeak escaped Fluttershy’s mouth before she could close it.
Pinkie Pie tilted her head to the side at an almost impossible angle. “Why not?”
Fluttershy hadn’t meant for her squeak to be taken as a ‘no’. She shook her head instead. “I do want to give it to her,” she insisted, “but I don’t think she would like it.”
“Don’t be silly, Fluttershy! Applejack would love it!” Pinkie Pie chuckled and grabbed the pegasus in a one-legged embrace, pulling her close. “What makes you think she wouldn’t?”
Fluttershy didn’t meet Pinkie’s eye, mainly because her snout was close enough to poke it. Pinkie Pie did have a habit of pulling her friends a little too close. “It’s not good enough for—”
“Aw, don’t tell me you believe that?” Pinkie cut Fluttershy off, her tone strangely incredulous. “You wanna know the real reason for why you don’t wanna give the toy to her?”
Fluttershy’s chest tightened. Her vision blurred for a split second and her heart froze. Pinkie Pie was about to call her out on something, something that she didn’t have the courage to admit to herself. And that terrified her.
“You don’t wanna give Applejack the toy because you’re worried she might take it some specific way, right?” Pinkie Pie let go of Fluttershy and stared at her. Even her blue eyes smiled. “You like-like Applejack, don’t you?”
Pinkie Pie’s eyes were still smiling, but what with? Mockery or understanding? Fluttershy’s face bore the heat of a volcano as she tried to decipher Pinkie as easily as the pink pony had deciphered her. Was she really so easy to read? She tried to formulate a response, dragging words from the depths of her heart, her mouth a parched desert. Under Pinkie’s scrutinising stare, she eventually managed to choke out, “Yes.”
In a flash Pinkie Pie hugged Fluttershy again, this time even tighter in a full embrace. A flicker of a thought teased Fluttershy’s mind – if only Pinkie was Applejack right now, and she could admit her feelings to the orange mare and have them returned in a hug like this – but that was selfish thought, and Fluttershy shelved it away shamefully. It was nice of Pinkie to accept her when she admitted a secret she kept so close to her heart for the last couple of years.
“Fluttershy.” Pinkie Pie released the pegasus and beamed brightly at her. “You’ve gotta give the plushie to Applejack. It would mean a lot to her.”
“B-but, what if she...” Fluttershy trailed off. It was inevitable that Applejack would take it the same way as Pinkie did. Applejack would realise that, by sewing the plush toy, Fluttershy cared more for the orange pony than she did the rest of her friends.
She would realise that Fluttershy had feelings for her.
“It would be a big, big shame if the plushie just sat all lonely in your cupboard,” Pinkie Pie went on, “so I think it’s for the best!”
Fluttershy smiled cautiously, grateful for Pinkie’s encouragement. “Do you really think so?”
“I know so, silly!” Pinkie Pie grinned. “Promise me you’ll give it to her. Okey-dokey-lokey?”
Fluttershy’s throat closed itself up at the thought of giving the plush toy to Applejack. But with Pinkie egging her on, she couldn’t say no. Besides, maybe Applejack would think of it as a friendly gesture? But... do I really want that?
“I’ll give it to her,” the yellow pegasus sighed wearily. There was an air of finality to those words, and Fluttershy shuddered as she realised she couldn’t turn back now.
“Pinkie promise?”
“Pinkie promise.”
*
Gentle rushes of air teased the long stalks of grass in Sweet Apple Acres. The scent of hay and apples wafted with the breeze, blending with the crisp, cool smell of the night. Above, stars flecked the dark sky and Luna’s moon glowed as pleasantly as ever.
Fluttershy wasn’t so sure it was best to talk to Applejack at night, but Pinkie had urged her to give the plushie as soon as possible. Unfortunately, the evening of that same day was as soon as was possible, and Pinkie Pie would not let Fluttershy wait until the next morning. She had even claimed it was more ‘romantic’ to give the plush toy at night, but Fluttershy found herself doubting the pink pony’s words. Since when had Pinkie Pie been a romantic? She was probably spouting second-hand advice from Rarity, and rather confused second-hand advice at that. Fluttershy had always thought sunset was the most romantic time of day. But Pinkie was Pinkie, and Fluttershy wasn’t going to argue with the hyperactive pony, especially when she was so caught up in her own excitement.
Fluttershy flattened her ears and looked behind her. She had her wing furled tightly around the Applejack plush; it wouldn’t fall over. Satisfied, she turned back and stared at the great barn – the obstacle between her and the plush’s model.
Applejack would still be out. Though it was evening, the orange pony would be out tending to her farm. Fluttershy knew Applejack would accomplish all tasks to do with the farm until midnight if she had to, sometimes even into the morning, so with any luck she was busy bucking apples. “Or something like that,” Fluttershy murmured to herself.
She didn’t know where Applejack would be exactly, but with each step towards the barn, Fluttershy found herself half-hoping and half-dreading that she would find Applejack outside.
Perhaps she should turn back, go home and try again tomorrow? That sounded like the smartest thing to do. She could tell Pinkie that Applejack was asleep, and that it would be rude to wake her to give her the plush. Pinkie Pie would understand. Yes, that was a good plan!
Fluttershy felt the burden on her shoulders lift ever so slightly as she finalised her decision. Her limbs no longer leaden, she turned back slowly, ready to depart. She breathed a sigh of relief as the obligation to give the toy was lifted from her. She could not think anything more horrible than giving the plush to Applejack and finding that the mare understood her gesture and rejected her outright. Fluttershy’s stomach clenched at the thought.
Perhaps it was for the best that she not give the toy to Applejack at all? Keep it in a secret place, away from prying eyes. She would tell Pinkie that she lost the plush toy and so she couldn’t give it to Applejack. Or maybe she could lie and tell Pinkie she did give the toy, but to keep it a secret so nopony had to know, so Applejack wouldn’t ever have to know about this silly episode?
Just as she was about to nod to herself, a voice stopped her in her tracks. It was a voice so brilliantly familiar, and normally Fluttershy would have jumped for joy to have recognised it; but now it was the last voice she wanted to hear. “Hey, Fluttershy! What brings you to the barn this late in the day?”
I am having the worst luck, Fluttershy thought dismally. I knew I should have just run away... She turned to face Applejack with sluggish deliberation. She didn’t think prolonging this exchange would be very smart, but her mind was quickly fogging up with panic, and she couldn’t process her thoughts properly. “H-hello, Applejack,” she greeted, her heart skipping a beat as the mare’s green eyes met hers. They still shone brilliantly in the evening gloom. “I, um... I... I was j-just wondering if I could borrow some apples for Angel,” she fibbed hurriedly, almost tripping over her own tongue in her haste.
Applejack grinned broadly, panting from having galloped over to Fluttershy. “Why, o’course you can, sugarcube! One question though. Why couldn’t you wait ‘til the mornin’?”
Fluttershy almost squeaked. Her heart was heavy with her reluctance to lie, especially to such an honest pony. “Angel is a little impatient... you know how he is...”
“Couldn’t you just give him the Stare to keep him quiet ‘til mornin’?” Applejack asked.
“I... I could...”
Applejack raised her eyebrows.
Oops. Fluttershy slipped up. She was speaking too slowly and she was beginning to arouse suspicion. But she couldn’t help it. Applejack was one of the few ponies she felt she could be honest with, and every action the pony did felt so sincere. To lie was to throw Applejack’s help back in her face, and that was the last thing Fluttershy wanted.
“Fluttershy, ponies hardly ever come visit me in the evenin’, and you’re the last pony I’d expect to see doin’ just that.” Applejack sat down on the grass, adjusting her hat with one hoof. “Now sit down an’ tell me what’s on your mind. I’m always all ears, sugarcube.”
Fluttershy felt like embracing Applejack right then and there. She came over at an unreasonable hour to bother Applejack, but the orange pony was still willing to help her out in spite of that. And that was not all; she had the most warm and welcoming expression, as if she was genuinely happy to see Fluttershy. The pegasus wouldn’t let herself believe that even for a second, but it was a nice, albeit fleeting, thought.
She sat down, keeping careful distance between herself and Applejack. Now that the mare was, as she had put it, ‘all ears’, Fluttershy almost felt obligated to bother her with her troubles. But even as she thought about the plush toy, her blood turned cold and her breath caught in her throat.
“You wanna talk about it?” Applejack prompted gently, looking wide-eyed at Fluttershy. There was no judgement in those green eyes. No scorn or impatience. That was perhaps what Fluttershy liked about Applejack most of all: the mare was understanding and sincere to the core. Fluttershy felt like she could talk to her about anything, and since she could hardly talk to anypony about her troubles, she held Applejack dear for this reason.
It was best to just come out with it. Applejack deserved honesty. But Fluttershy found herself shaking as she tried to unfurl her wing, and her breathing increased rapidly. She felt cold, yet hot at the same time. Had her heart just stopped?
“Fluttershy, have you got a fever?” Before Fluttershy could do anything, Applejack put a hoof to her forehead. “You’re burnin’ up.”
Fluttershy bit her lip as Applejack withdrew her hoof. “You should come inside; I’ll get you somethin’ for yer fever.”
“No!” Fluttershy’s protest escaped her despite her insistence to keep her mouth closed. At Applejack’s startled expression, she went on, “no... no, I don’t have a fever.”
Applejack frowned. “You sure? Yer forehead is hot.”
Fluttershy shook her head solemnly. “I’m sure. I’m fine, Applejack, honestly. Actually...” This was it. There was no going back now. You couldn’t backtrack an ‘actually’ without sounding even more awkward than you already were. Fluttershy took in a shuddering breath in an attempt to steady her swiftly beating heart. I can’t do this, I can’t do this. What if she realises what the plush toy actually means? Her thoughts were a blur as her wing unfurled fully and she deliberately took the plush in her hoof.
Applejack saw her action and watched with interest. “What’s up, Fluttershy?”
Mustering all the strength she could, she held the plush toy out to Applejack. Her heart pounding, she watched Applejack’s puzzled expression warily. This was harder than anything Fluttershy had done, even harder than standing up to the red dragon, even harder than learning to be assertive...
“What’s this, sugarcube?”
Fluttershy had to look away as she explained in a strangled, high-pitched voice. She forced the words out, acutely aware of the consequences this would bring. “I-I made this plushie for you. It’s of you, but it doesn’t look too much like you, I did a bad job on it and it’s missing your hat and its head is too big and I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry...”
She felt Applejack’s hoof on her own as she took the plush toy. She couldn’t look, instead taking interest in a blade of grass by her tail that turned dark green, almost black, in the darkness. The blood pounded in her ears and flushed her cheeks, so her interest in the grass sharpened. She noticed some blades were shorter than others, as if somepony had pulled out stalks in boredom. She might do that. Maybe. Anything to distract her from the pony that sat beside her.
“Fluttershy, this is some mighty fine craftsmanship right here,” Applejack murmured. Fluttershy listened carefully for a tone of disdain, but there was none. “It’s adorable, too.”
Fluttershy cleared her throat and tried to withdraw into herself, her muscles taut with apprehension. All she could do was lower her head so far her neck ached, and her ears were practically plastered to her head. “Th-thank you,” she whispered.
“Sugarcube, why you bein’ so... well, shy about it?”Applejack’s voice was a smile. Fluttershy chanced a glance and found the apple mare was in fact grinning, looking at Fluttershy with... gratitude? Yes, that was all it was. It was too much to hope that the look held anything else.
Fluttershy wanted desperately for her face to stop burning. “I’m sorry,” was all she could think to say.
“Did you make one fer each of us?” Applejack asked.
It was at this point that Fluttershy wanted to bolt away. Her muscles were tight with the intention of doing just that, and she had to fight to stay in place. This question determined the outcome of tonight. No, not just tonight. This question determined the outcome of Fluttershy’s friendship with Applejack. If Applejack did not feel the same way, their relationship would never be the same...
Fluttershy’s eyes stung. How could she put their friendship at risk like that? It was such a silly – no, a stupid thing to do. But yet, it happened. And there was no way of going back to change things.
“No,” the pegasus choked out, her voice as heavy as her words. “I only made one of you.”
In the distance, the barn door creaked. A dog, possibly Winona, barked. Had that been Apple Bloom calling something out just now? Shouldn’t she be in bed?
Wind rustled the grass again, and Fluttershy took momentary relief in her pink hair blowing over her burning face.
“Do I really mean that much to you, Fluttershy?”
Applejack’s mild voice probed at Fluttershy, and the pegasus had no choice but to be completely honest now. “Yes.”
“As in...” Applejack trailed off.
Was she waiting for Fluttershy to fill in the blank? Either way, the yellow pegasus didn’t know if she could do that. Her tongue wasn’t working properly right now, and neither was her mind. Anything she said would come out a jumbled mess.
“I’m more than just a best friend to you, ain’t I?”
There it was. The question. It was not hopeful – as much as Fluttershy would have liked it to be – but it wasn’t contemptuous, either. Well, you had to acknowledge your victories, however small. Fluttershy decided to just shut down all her thoughts and fight through the pain.
“Yes.”
There was silence. Even nature decided to sit out for this one. There was no wind, only a stifling air that threatened to suffocate Fluttershy. The blade of grass was no longer interesting.
“Fluttershy... Fluttershy...”
“It’s okay,” Fluttershy amended flatly. “Let’s just forget this ever happened. It’s for the best. We should just stay friends—”
“Sugarcube, don’t be talkin’ such nonsense.” Fluttershy felt Applejack’s hoof on her own. “Fluttershy, listen to me. You’re the sweetest, kindest pony I ever had the pleasure of meetin’. You’re always ready to help me with my problems and you hear me out any time I have worries. You babysit Apple Bloom and look after Winona whenever I ask you to, even if it’s inconvenient for you. You’ve done so much fer me.”
Fluttershy didn’t know where Applejack was going with this, so she sat it out with careful detachment. It was best not to get her hopes up.
“You and I have had some great talks. I’ve connected with you on a level that goes deeper than the friendship I have with other ponies.”
A level that goes deeper than friendship...? For the first time, possibility opened ever so slightly in Fluttershy’s heart.
“Fluttershy, you’re an amazin’ mare. I’m gonna be completely honest with you, ‘cause that’s what you deserve. I...”
Fluttershy’s eyes widened and she looked at Applejack despite herself. It was difficult to tell in the darkness, but she thought she could make out a hint of red on Applejack’s face.
“I weren’t too sure until now, but I think I was startin’ to feel somethin’ sweet for you recently. Turns out...” Applejack fiddled with her hat, “... I was right.”
Elation. Relief. Amazement. All three emotions coursed through Fluttershy simultaneously, leaving her body a shaking mess. She couldn’t comprehend Applejack properly. Had she really just heard what she thought she heard? It was too much to hope for. It was too much to think that maybe Applejack had feelings for her, even little feelings as she said she did.
“Fluttershy, you makin’ this plush toy fer me means so much. I’m... I’m so glad you did.”
Fluttershy finally managed to speak. “You... you like me?”
“I think so, at least. I... Fluttershy, I think you’re a very special pony and the fact that you’d make a plush just fer me makes me so...” Applejack was breathing unevenly. “Makes me feel strange. Happy, I think? But not just happy. Ah, sugar, I ain’t never gotten to grips with my feelings like you or Rarity, and I ain’t one fer sappy stuff, but now I feel like one of them ponies in Rarity’s romance novels.”
Fluttershy still couldn’t believe it, but she was too happy to think reasonably. “Honestly?”
Applejack managed a chuckle. “I don’t lie, sugarcube. So...”
Fluttershy found that she could barely sit still as she finally admitted her feelings to the mare she’d kept close to her heart for some time. “I really like you, Applejack.”
Applejack edged closer to Fluttershy and pulled her into a hug. Fluttershy hugged her back tightly, hardly daring to believe that any of this was happening. She smelled the fresh scent of apples in the orange pony’s mane and leaned her head on her shoulder. Applejack sighed deeply. “I really like you too, sugarcube.”
Between them sat the Applejack plush toy with its overly-large head and curious button eyes, cushioned neatly by their bodies, its fur silver in the moon’s glow.
