Scootaloo and the School of Ghouls

by Silent Bob

The Captain's Third Option

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"Ready the captured Dalek stunning device and prepare to de-cloak the ship!" Starfire roared. "We aren't letting any nightmare-land scum harm the Elements!"

"Belay that order!" Jack called immediately.

Starfire's eyes widened as she turned towards Jack, her mouth agape in exasperation. "Jack?! You can't be serious!"

"Also, I have an order of my own," he grunted, giving her a glare. "Calm down and THINK for a second, Starfire!"

"Oh sweet Celestia! Give me one good reason why we're sitting here wasting time!" Starfire growled, the entire bridge crew now looking at her and her commander.

"Because," Jack continued, taking a deep breath to calm himself. "Look at the picture here: we have ghouls in the treehouse on a date that they are NOT supposed to be here. They must have a way to bring Scootaloo back to the Nightmare Realm!"

"Oh you gotta be kidding me!" Starfire practically screamed. "Jack! For all we know they could be more rogues! Perhaps they're working for Sleighbell. You know what's been happening. The murders have increased... the sightings have tripled! For all we know, there could be a massive rogue ghoul army readying for invasion! I've seen it before, Jack. I've seen a group of them try. They were only stopped because our leader had the guts to do something about it. However, who's to say she will this time?!"

"Is this what my organization is turning into?" Jack said, shaking his head in disbelief. "A huge ball of paranoid misconduct who’s only rule seems to be that old excuse: 'the ends justify the means'?! Damnit, I made this in Princess Celestia's honor of all ponies!"

"And you shouldn't have!" Starfire snapped. "She was never willing to do what has to be done for our survival. If we did things her way we'd all be dead by now!” She then began to storm about the bridge, pacing, before snapping back towards Jack. “I'm not allowing them to bring another vampire into their fold! Not one who may have a connection to..." She gave a quick shiver. "Winter...."

Jack took a deep breath. "Starfire, I know why you're doing this. You think you owe this side something for all the times you've slacked off doing what you were born for. But you don't need to overcompensate. Making peace with yourself doesn't have to come through the barrel of a gun."

Starfire glanced away from him at that, thoughts racing through her mind as she squinted an eyebrow. Jack continued to gaze at her as she did, the eyes of the bridge crew as well.

"No," she finally said, narrowing her eyes. "No! I'm not allowing it to happen again!" She then looked back towards Jack, giving a hint of a sigh. "You'll thank me for this, Jack. They'll all thank me for this!"

He gave a moan. "And what will that be?"

She took a deep breath. "You want to know? Well here it is! From this point forward, I am relieving you of command of Horsehood!"

Jack's jaw nearly hit the floor. "What?!"

She then began to glance about at every pony on the bridge with glaring eyes.

"Any objections?!" she called, before marching to one pony, meeting him at eye level an inch away. "You?!"

He shook his head.

She marched to another.

"Starfire... this is nuts!"

"And how about you?!" she continued, ignoring him. "Want to follow Jack into the dark?! Somepony who won’t even reveal who the buck he really is?! Anything about his past!?"

The crewmember shook her head as well.

Starfire then twirled about to Harness, not even meeting him eye to eye. "Then it's settled. Relinquish your weapons, or I will be forced to take them from you."

At that, Jack let out a growl before unholstering a stolen Ratzi Germane Luger, standing on his hind legs and aiming down its sights. "I'm not letting you do this. I've got my own skeletons in the closet to kill." He then narrowed his eyes. "However, I will relinquish one bullet: where do you want it?"

Starfire began fluttering in the air, a vein throbbing in her forehead as two green suns formed on her frontal hooves. "You can't take me, alone, Jack. What makes you think you can take on the entire bridge?!"

Chick-Chick!

Chick-Chick!

Chick-Chick!

A multitude of Thompsons were pointed at him.

"Drop. The gun," Starfire growled.

Jack gave a shiver, continuing to aim it at her.

"DO IT!"

Jack's eyes darted about, his mind calculating his chances.

A beat.

After a moment, he sighed, took a deep breath, and knelt down, setting the Luger on the floor.

They were too slim.

Starfire gave a smile, taking a deep breath as well, before turning towards the captain of the Nimbus. "Captain Brannihoof! Drop the Dalek stunning device."

"Will do, ma'm," he said, giving Jack a glare before hitting a button on a nearby console.

CLANK-CLANK!

Various gears and mechanisms then whirred to life, the bomb bay doors of the Nimbus opening steadily; and out of it dropped a small, metal sphere towards the treehouse below.

☼☼☼

...

...

CRAAAAAASSSHHHH!.!.!

"Woah!"

"EEEEEEP!"

A multitude of dust and wood fell down upon the gathering within the lobby,

THUNK!.!.!

A small, black sphere then crashed down upon its floor, forming a dent in its wood.

"Uhhh! What the heck is that?!" 'mortal' Spike cried, backing away from it.

"Whatever it is, that's definitely not a meteorite!" Dashie gulped.

At that, both Twilight and Soulshard galloped into the lobby, their eyes quickly widening.

"Oh night damnit! Do you think-" Soulshard cried.

Twilight gave a quick nod. "Yeah! It can't be a coincidence!"

She then narrowed her eyes, purple wisps of light forming about her horn.

"Twilight! What are you doing?!" Spike yelled.

"Whatever this thing is, I don't think it's a friendly neighborhood fruit basket," Twilight said, not even glancing at him, before giving a smirk. "Batter up!"

"Annnd Twilight Sparkle steps up to plate!" Apple Bloom smiled.

Twilight's horn began to glow brighter.

"Annnd she swings..." Sweetie continued.

A purple beam of light shot forth from it.

BUUUUUUUUZZZZZZ!.!.!

Only for it to strike an invisible barrier around the device, it breaking like a great wave around its form.

"And misses...." Scootaloo winced.

"W-What?!" Twilight gasped.

At that, an obnoxious, robotic voice emanated from it:

"HAW HAW HAW! PUNY PONY MAGIC IS NOTHING AGAINST THE MIGHT OF THE DALEKS!

"The who?!" Twilight gasped. "Who the heck are the Daleks?! I thought Horsehood sent this!"

"I-I don't know, but I think it might be time to skedaddle, Twilight," Spike gulped, pointing towards the door.

"PREPARE FOR YOUR IMMINENT CAPTURE AND SUBSEQUENT TORTURE IN THREE FRELS!"

Soulshard's eyes widened. "EVERYONE OUT!"

"THREE!"

"EEEP!" Scootaloo was tossed on Dashie's back before she flew towards the door.

"TWO!"

"What the heck is a frel?!" bone dragon Spike gasped, fluttering madly towards the exit.

"ONE!"

Pipsqueak's panted, closing in on it as well.... "Ooooh boy-"

"EXTERMINATE!"

ZAAAAAAAAAAAAP!.!.!

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!"

A great wave of blue particles shot forth in a three-sixty degree arc from the device, completely saturating the interior of the treehouse.

"ACK!"

Spike slammed down upon his chest.

"EEEEP!"

The Crusaders were hit as well, still panting as they fell to the floor.

"Bloody Horsehood!" Pipsqueak cried, him and everyghoul and pony else thudding to the ground… all except one.

And silence fell.

☼☼☼

"All but one target neutralized," a radio squawked. "It's taking flight..."

"Hmph," she grunted. "Did we get the vampire though? That's all that matters."

A second of silence.

"Roger that! Bringing her up now!" it squawked again, this time with a hint of pride.

"Mmmm, I never thought I'd say this, but thank Celestia for the Daleks!" Starfire smirked.

"You're making a huge mistake, Starfire," Jack Harness growled. "You have no idea what ghouls you're even capturing! Did you even bother to ID them?!"

Starfire rolled her eyes, giving him a look. "You can't let me have anything, can you?! Look Jack, I know they don't have a means of travelling between the realms. Their power source is used up on Nightmare Night and Nightmare Night alone."

"Unless they're making an exception," Jack said, raising a hoof. "Maybe they made a short-lived portal..."

"I don't think they would, Nightmare Night is too important to them to risk not having a full-fledged way to get over here," Starfire growled, before marching to a nearby console and pressing a button, activating the radio. "Ground teams, how close are you?"

As if to answer her, a voice immediately made itself known:

"Heyo!" it called.

A suited Horsehood agent flanked by three pegasi cronies walked through the entrance to the bridge, two of them carrying both Scootaloo and Twilight Soulshard.

Jack's eyes widened upon seeing them. "I-Is that?"

"Mph, that was quick," Starfire grunted, moving over towards the two as the Horsehood pegasi plopped them onto the floor. She then nudged Soulshard with a hoof, a hint of disappointment in her voice as she said, "Twilight Soulshard. The lover of my replacement... I never thought she'd go rogue..."

"Oh sweet Celestia, Starfire! There’s no way she went rogue!” Jack cried, his eyes practically pleading for her to look towards sense. "You saw her yourself trying to take down Prince Blackblood on Nightmare Night!"

"Yes, after she kidnapped the Element of Magic and had her dragged to the Nightmare Realm," she snapped, shooting Jack another look. "Obviously she's a volatile element, no pun intended."

Jack facehoofed... hard.

"Captain Brannihoof! Power the Nimbus' engines. Set course to Horsehood Headquarters!" Starfire ordered.

"Yes, ma'm!" he said, throwing a salute, before turning to a pale-green coated unicorn on the bridge. "Skif, power the engines!"

He returned the order with a blank look. "You're standing near a console that can do that, sir..."

"Yes, but it sounds so sexy when I make it an order!" Brannihoof replied, grinning smugly.

"Oh dear Celestia," the helmsman groaned, before hitting a few buttons, the loud hum of the engines soon filling the bridge as the zeppelin lurched forward.

Captain Jack shook an incredulous head, glancing downward.

"You'll thank me for this, later, Jack," Starfire smiled, trying to meet his eyes. "And when this is all over, and you've had a chance to see that I'm right, Horsehood is yours."

"Thank you for what?" Jack laughed. "Ruining some kid's life?” He shook his head again, before glancing down at Scootaloo. "Starfire, take a good long look at that kid, and tell me: what do you see?"

Starfire glanced towards her.

"I see a threat to Equestria-"

"What do you REALLY see?!"

Starfire remained silent, glancing away, though to defy all odds, a hint of sympathy actually scratched the surface of her cool, green eyes.

"Sucks to look at her that way, doesn't it?"

Starfire shot him a glare. "You're not talking me out of this."

Captain Harness shook his head. "I didn't think I'd be able to.” He then raised a hoof. “However, I still have a chance here to do something that's been a long time coming." At that, he took a deep breath, his mind wondering into the past. "A long time ago, some very wise words were whispered into my ear: that one day, all ponies with shattered consciences will have a chance to tip the karmic balance back into their favor.” He actually put on a slight smile. “Well, today is that day. I'm done trying to screw the pain away.”

He paused for a brief second, Starfire quirking a suspicious eyebrow.

“Remember when I said earlier; that I wished we had another choice? Well, I've thought of one."

He reached for something in his oldschool coat's pocket...

"Jack... what are you doing?" Starfire said, narrowing her eyes.

"Creating a beacon,” Jack smiled. “I'm taking the third option."

He gripped a cyanide capsule, quickly moving it to his tongue....

Starfire's eyes widened in horror.

"Don't you dare!" she roared, surging towards him. "DON'T YOU BUCKING DARE!"

And swallowed it.

The mouths of the bridge crew parted.

Starfire panted.

And Jack... smirked.

"See ya in a bit," he winked.

At first, it seemed like nothing was going to happen. However, soon, Jack began to gag, as if he were swallowing an invisible rancid meal, before finally thunking to the ground, his eyes rolling to the back of his skull.

Starfire stood still for a second, stunned, her eye beginning to twitch.

“Ma’m?”

A second later, she glanced towards the heavens…

"Starfire?"

And then... all Hell broke loose:

"RRRAUUUUUUUUGHHHHHHH!

CAPTAIN!

JACK!

HARNESS!.!.!.!.!.!"

And for a brief instant, her eyes flickered a pure BLACK!

☼☼☼

Two hundred miles away, Derpy's ear perked within the TARDIS. She turned towards the brown stallion within.

"Doctor, did you hear that?"

The Doctor squinted in thought for a second, brought a hoof to his chin, and then shook his head.

"Nope."

☼☼☼

"All hands! Prepare to be boarded!" Starfire roared into the intercom, red klaxons beginning to blare.

"Boarded by who, ma'm?!" Skif cried.

She narrowed her eyes, before summoning her starbolts once again. She looked as if she was bracing for a coming storm.

"Death."

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