The Elder Sign

by Mithos

Rating: teen
Tags: Princess Celestia, Princess Luna, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Comedy, Romance, Adventure
Length: 24640

An adventure of Lovecraftian scale! Emerald Shine's desire to meet Princess Luna drags him into a conspiracy involving the princess and his best friend Hex. Who are the Keepers of the Night, and what plans do they have in store for him?

Sometimes, you're not the special pony. Emerald is not the special pony. Between living with his dragon, being friends with an eccentric author, his job, life was not exciting. He dreamed of a different world, one where he was a hero, saving the princess and being rich and famous.

So when his friend ask him to go to the Grand Galloping Gala as his guest, he takes the offer. That's when things started to get interesting.

An odd letter. A death threat. A disgruntled officer. The name.

The Keepers of the Night.

For some, the Grand Galloping Gala is the best night ever. For Emerald, it was the beginning of his journey through a world that few ponies knew existed.

Cover art by James Corck, artist behind the Ask Movie Slate tumblr.

Published 2012-11-21 15:40:01 UTC
Last updated 2013-07-21 15:56:53 UTC

Emerald Shine, Monster Hunter

“Breaking news! Luna, Princess of the Night, has disappeared! Princess Luna disappeared during-“

I shut the radio off with a flick of my magic. How dare they? I wouldn’t let such an atrocity continue!

I spun my chair around to look at the city outside. Canterlot was busy tonight, and from my penthouse I could see ponies far below moving about the streets. Such a large city held many secrets, and I was privy to them all.

I turned back to my desk and grabbed up the small glass of apple cider, draining it in one gulp. The glass clattered loudly as it dropped back onto the desk with a little more force than intended, nearly spilling the ice onto the leather bound book open before me.

My horn glowed and the pages began turning on my command. The disappearance of the princess had me uneasy and angry. I couldn’t help but grumble my frustrations.

Before my mutters could grow to shouts, my penthouse office door opened and Princess Celestia trotted in, accompanied by her royal guard.

I rose from my chair and bowed. “It is an honor, Princess. How is the search going?”

She showed me a small scroll, saying, “I received this scroll shortly after Luna disappeared. What information can you glean from it?”

I unrolled it and began reading,

HA HA, YOU SUCK.

WE GOT LUNA.

YOU’RE UGLY AND SMELL.

WE’RE AWESOME.

HAIL CTHULHU!

-FUTURE RULER OF EQUESTRIA

“Well, it looks like a foal with no respect for proper etiquette wrote this,” I replied.

“I had hoped you would point out something less obvious. This is your expertise after all.”

I dropped the scroll onto my desk as I picked up the book with my magic. The pages began flipping quickly until it stopped on a drawing of a large squid-headed monstrosity on one page and an odd spell circle design on the other. “I apologize. Time is of the essence, and wasting it is a horrible idea. I feared the timing of Princess Luna’s disappearance, and my fears have been confirmed.”

The book turned to show Princess Celestia what I meant. Her eyes widened in shock, “You don’t mean…they intend to summon Cthulhu using Princess Luna?”

The book slammed closed, and lowered back onto my desk. “Don’t worry princess, I know exactly where the cult is operating. The stars are right tonight, and I was prepared for such an act to occur. I will rescue her, and stop the cult’s evil machinations!”

----------

BAM!

The door to the Evil Cult’s Headquarters shattered under my mighty attack. A single magic missile was all it took to gain entrance.

I had three objectives: Save Luna, stop the cult, and maybe get a sweet reward.

Suddenly, a hundred cultists dressed in matching, magenta robes swarmed the room.

One of them laughed, “Ha! They sent one pathetic unicorn to fight us!”

I laughed as well as my horn glowed a pale green color. One blinding flash of light and a few cries of “Oh no it’s him,” and all the cultists were reduced to ash. I grinned triumphantly as I charged through the room at the next set of doors.

Three busted doors later, and I was standing in the main summoning chamber. In front of me, a huge spell circle full of arcane symbols, odd designs, and other creepy images dominated the entire room. Torches along the walls ensured the entire design was illuminated before me. It was the same one as my book.

There were only the ponies in the room: yours truly, another cultist on the other side of the circle, and the beautiful Princess Luna. Luna was suspended in a brightly lit cage over the center of the circle, looking as sweet as ever.

I shouted up to Luna, “Don’t worry Princess, I’m here to save you!”

I heard laughing coming from the opposite end of the circle. I knew that cocky self-assured laughter…

“It’s been a long time, Emerald!” He called out across the room.

“Well, well, well, if it isn’t Leo,” I replied, “I was wondering what happened after graduation. So you left the school after I stopped your evil scheme and went on to lead a cult.”

“Yes. I decided to work towards a new goal. With my cult, I plan to take my revenge against the world that shunned me! I also have very special plans for you!”

“Do those plans involve being less of a loser? If not, get in line, there’s about a hundred others who want to take me down.”

“Sorry Emerald, but this rescue attempt will end in failure. It’s time to die, Emerald Shine!” With that last shout Leo stamped his hoof on the edge of the circle. Immediately the circle began glowing a sickly green color. The center glowed brightest, blinding me.

I saw the claws appear. From the center rose a gnarled green-clawed hand of monstrous size. It was reaching up to grab Luna!

Not on my watch!

I focused my magic in my horn and blasted it away with one shot. The claw landed perfectly on Leo, grabbed him, and dragged him into the center. Perfect reward, if you ask me, for trying to play with dark forces. After Leo was dragged into the portal, I focused my magic again and wiped the whole circle away.

I carefully lowered Luna’s cage to the floor with my magic. As she trotted out, she said, “Thank you for saving me. May we ask your name?”

I smiled, “I am Emerald Shine, Monster Hunter!” Man I feel awesome. I bowed to her and said, “I was sent to rescue you. I am here to escort you safely back to Canterlot.” I was suave, charming, and an all around hero.

Of course she smiled and asked, “As your reward, would you like to go on a date with me?”

Being a gentlepony I—

BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP

I jumped, knocking my desk lamp to the floor with a crash. I shook my head groggily. My boss had woken me up with an air horn, and he did not seem happy to have one of his data analysts asleep on the job.

“Is there a reason I shouldn’t fire you?” He asked, drawing out the last three words for added punch.

I started to sweat as I answered, “Sorry sir…I just fell asleep for a moment or two—”

He shook his head and said, “No excuses! You should be working, not sleeping! You got the latest figures back on the Buttercup case?”

I shook my head one last time to wipe my dream from memory. My magic lifted the file from my desk and I said, “Here it is. Some odd deposits, but nothing too suspicious.” My boss bit down on the file and walked out without a second look.

A yawn escaped as I lifted my lamp back onto the desk. The glass shade had shattered, but nothing a skilled unicorn couldn’t fix. I sighed and swept it into the garbage bin; I’d have to buy a new one. I stretched one last time before casting a glance around my cubicle. Nothing big and fancy; I was just a data analyst, not one of the bigwig lawyers. Then again, I didn’t want to be. All I had was my desk, my chair, a filing cabinet, and a few photos. Nothing special, just a photo of a landscape, another of me and my friend at our graduation a few months ago, and an article from a newspaper.

A passing secretary dropped a small note on my desk. I kind of hoped it would say I was fired. At least then I could go home and try to find a job I didn’t loathe. That, or maybe it could have been an invitation to dinner. However, it was a message saying I had a visitor at the front desk. I smiled, hopped off my chair and headed for a bathroom down the hall. I quickly checked myself in the mirror.

I rubbed the sleepiness from my eyes and let out another yawn. I ran a hoof through my mane, but the black hair refused to stay tidy. I was able to straighten my vest, so I no longer looked like I was just caught sleeping at my desk.

As I exited, I hoped my visitor was a cute mare. Boy was I wrong.

Just as I entered the lobby, a bright flash of light heralded the appearance of my visitor. I jumped away and spun around, trying to keep from yelping. Standing a few hooves away was my best buddy: Hex.

His full name was Hex Pen Lovecraft, or HP Lovecraft as most ponies knew him. He once tried hitting on a mare by claiming the 'HP' in his name stood for 'High Performance' Lovecraft. We’d been friends since our first year of school, but acted a bit more like rivals. He enjoyed playing pranks on me, and we spent a lot of time in verbal debates.

I grinned at him and said, “Still haven’t gotten that spell down, eh?” His light brown mane had small swirls of smoke coming off the ends, and his grey coat seemed disheveled. Then again, he always looked disheveled. Guess it comes with being an author.

He grinned back and said, “Just be thankful I didn’t teleport in the middle of you!” He added with a touch of seriousness, “You would be DEAD.”

I laughed and said, “Oh really? Please. Only the good die young. I have a lot of years ahead of me.”

Author's Note

4/30: Edited it again to add some extra exposition. Also, I can't get the formatting on the letter and the page break right. Sorry about that!

Emerald Shine, Data Analyst

“What’s three weeks from tomorrow?” Hex suddenly asked after we finished ordering.

Hex had dragged me to a café for lunch while I listened to a proposal. I was wary. His ‘proposals’ were usually plans, bordering on insane, for making money or something.

What had him so excited? I shook my head and said, “No idea. What is it?”

He moaned. “Shine! You should know!”

I rolled my eyes and said, “Sorry, I’ve been busy lately. Will you just tell me?”

He shook his head. I glared at him. “You’re gonna make me guess, huh?” He smiled. Bastard.

I sighed and said, “Your new book?” Nope.

“Some new movie?” No.

“The new The Legend of Celestia game?” Head shake.

This was getting annoying. “Birthday?” Shake.

I narrowed my eyes. “Funeral?” He paused for a second, then shook his head.

“Tell me now or it’ll be your funeral!”

Before I could guess again he exclaimed, “The Grand Galloping Gala!” I nearly fell off my seat. One or two other ponies at the café were not as lucky. He was grinning like mad, nearly bouncing in his chair. Ponies around the café were glaring at us.

I shook it off. When Hex got like this, it was impossible to calm him down. I sighed and said slowly, “And I should care why?”

His smile turned into a sly, evil grin as he said, “THE Grand Galloping Gala? WHY should you care? Hmm…oh, I don’t know, maybe it’s because the Wonderbolts are going to be there. Hmm…”

My expression had not changed as I replied, “That’s why you want to go. Why would I want to go?”

He gasped, acting as if I had insulted him. He laughed it off, joking, “Well, I mean, they are the best aerial stunt show in Equestria, who WOULDN’T want to go, you know?”

Now it was my turn for a grin, “Oh really? So you’re not, say, trying to get with the captain…” He started to sweat. Good. I continued, “Good ol…whats-her-face, what was it…” I tapped my chin with my hoof. Hex looked on the verge of screaming. Finally I said slowly, “Spit…Pyre?”

He blushed bright red and said, “SPITFIRE! Her name is SPIT-FIRE!”

I feigned surprise and said, “Oh…right. So you’re gonna try and hit on her at the Gala?” He nodded confidently.
“How are you going to get tickets?” I asked, a note of boredom in my voice.

His grin returned. “That’s what I wanted to talk to you about,” he said, chuckling. He leaned forward and said, “I got invited, and I have an extra ticket. Care to join me?”

“I don’t really want to spend another night watching you try to get her attention. Can we both just agree it won’t happen for either of us?” I sighed.

“Oh, come on Emerald!” Hex whined. He grabbed me by the shoulders and shook me, “You and I will have a lot of fun together, for the whole night!”

“Sorry, I don’t swing that way,” I said flatly.

He let me go and leaned back, “Don’t worry, I’m out of your league anyway. Even if I was into stallions, no thanks.”

I fired back, “You sound desperate. Spitfire still not giving you any?”

“How’s it with Princess Luna?” he countered with.

K. O! I choked on my drink. A few ponies were glaring at us, annoyed by our constant outbursts.

“Oh right! You’re desperate, like me!” He laughed.

I wiped my mouth and stuttered, “Sh-shut up!”

He smiled and said, “So you didn’t know that Princess Luna will be at the Gala this year?”

I perked my ears up. “Really now?” I asked. “Wait…how in Equestria did you get tickets?”

He waved his hoof in the air and said, “Bah. Details.”

I couldn’t believe my luck. Was this good or horrible?

I still hadn’t decided if I would go when I got back to my house later that evening. Hex had shoved the extra ticket into my hooves anyway, but I wasn’t sure. I was glad for the invitation though. Work had been killing me lately, so anything to take my attention away from it was welcomed. I was almost certain that the Gala would not go as I hoped, but I couldn’t completely resist taking Hex’s offer.

“The minute he said Princess Luna would be there, I knew there would be no denying it. Could I say it was fate? Or just luck? I always assumed such an opportunity would never happen, so now that it has, I have no idea what to do!” I explained.

“Stop being so depressing! Keep thinking like that, and I’ll freeze you,” Moorfrost threatened as I voiced my concerns.

I groaned loudly. That was her reaction to everything I said.

My ice blue dragon assistant, Moorfrost, had been with me since I entered Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns. The initial entrance exam was to hatch a dragon’s egg with magic. I passed and got Moorfrost. Her icy name was a joke initially by Hex, but I liked it so much I kept it. She started breathing ice after she ate my project for class on flower species of Equestria.

She pushed a few apples in front of me and said, “You never know what might happen! You may go and meet her, and it turns out she falls for you! Have some hope!”

I groaned again and slammed my head into the table. Probably should have moved the apples first.

The dragon had always been optimistic, even in the worst of times. I figured it balanced out my pessimistic attitude nicely, but it was always a little annoying. I still liked it though.

I lifted an apple (what was left of one) with my magic and took a bite. I put my thoughts together as I ate. Of course I would be happy to have that happen. I’d been dreaming about something like that happening since I saw Luna at my graduation ceremony. She seemed so delicate, so beautiful. But at the same time I was realistic. I was just a slightly above average unicorn data analyst. I had neither riches nor influence. She was a princess! She was an alicorn!

“It’s never gonna happen,” I mutter with a sigh, “The princess and the loser? Ha!”

“As Lovecraft would say, ‘Bah. Details.’ Love could bloom from such odd circumstances!” Moorfrost suggested.

I chuckled. Hex Pen wasn’t the type of pony to let small details get in the way. He would consider my worries to be details, and thus unimportant. But to me, they were game breakers. I wasn’t the kind of unicorn who sweeps the mare off her hooves, even with magic!

“Well, if you don’t want to go, I’ll be more than glad to take the ticket off your hooves! I’m sure somepony will pay a ton of gems for it!” Moorfrost said with a smile.

In an instant the ticket was snatched up in Moorfrost’s claw as she bolted from the kitchen. As I watched her run off I muttered, “Maybe I should just–”

I slapped myself. I needed to snap out of this junk! I shouted, “Get back here with my ticket!”

She hadn’t gotten far when I tackled her to the ground. “Give me the ticket,” I said, the words drenched in annoyance.

“NO! You don’t want to go anyway!” Moorfrost cried.

“Yes I do. Now give me the ticket before I break your legs.”

“No! You won’t go! You’re too scared!” She tried to roll onto her back, but I held her down.

“Nuh-uh. You’re not going to freeze me like last time. Now give me the ticket!”

“On one condition! You have to go and talk to Princess Luna!”

I rolled my eyes. I was going to anyway…probably…

“Ok, I will talk with Princess Luna.”

“And you have to confess your love!” She was grinning. I could see the edges of her mouth curled back!

I groaned, “Fine, I’ll go and confess my love. Now give me the ticket.”

Moorfrost opened her claw and released the small gold ticket. It floated in the air surrounded by my magic. I let her up and said jokingly, “You’re such a little brat sometimes.”

As the night dragged on, I was starting to feel better about the whole situation. Maybe the Gala would go better than I initially thought.

But then the letter came.

The scroll smacked into my ear with a chilly thud. It clattered to the ground as I cursed under my breath. I looked across the room at Moorfrost in her reading chair. She was acting oblivious, but how many ice dragons are in this apartment?

I grumbled and dropped the frozen scroll in the pail of water I keep by my chair. The only downside to having an ice-breathing dragon as an assistant is having to thaw the letters. Also having her burp them directly at you so they always hit something vital.

A few minutes later the smell hit me. I almost dropped my book. I looked over at the pail and noticed the green sheen now present in the water. I pulled the letter out and clamped my mouth shut. It was coming from the seal.

An acrid green seal bearing a squid headed monster with a face of writhing tentacles. The smell…was nothing I could accurately describe. All I could think of was wet, rotting leaves near a shore, a mix of disgusting odors and salty sea air. But even this description didn’t explain it well enough.

I opened it expecting it to be Hex’s neat writing. The entire letter was a single line in blocky letters:

THE STARS ARE RIGHT.

“The…stars are right?” I muttered as I read the only line.

Moorfrost rolled her eyes and groaned, “HP being weird again…” So she was paying attention!

I grabbed a quill and a blank scroll and wrote a quick response to Hex. Moorfrost looked it over once before finally sending it. She can be such a nag sometimes. We waited a few moments before the burp of icy coolness brought another scroll, this one bearing Hex’s usual simple red seal. After thawing, I opened it and read:

Sorry, I’m not sure what you mean. I haven’t sent you any letters all day. Are you sure this isn’t from the fan club or something?

-HP

‘When the stars were right, They could plunge from world to world through the sky; but when the stars were wrong, They could not live.’

I remembered those lines from one of my favorite Lovecraft stories, The Call of Cthulhu.

It was just a prank. Had to be. I must be tired to even consider such a thing.

Moorfrost walked over to my side and asked, “The letter wasn’t from Lovecraft?” I shook my head. She grabbed the letter and smelled the seal. She recoiled immediately, saying, “That isn’t normal wax. The foul smell…it’s nothing I’ve ever experienced. Scented wax usually smells…well, good.”

I looked out the window at the night sky. Even from my crappy place, you could see a good chunk of the sky, as well as the moon.

Were the stars right? Was it the beginning of some age of madness, ruled by the Great Old Ones?

Wait, am I believing this?! They’re fiction! Stories! They were made up!

Hex invented the whole Cthulhu Mythos when he and I were in school together. He spun tales of horrible monsters whose images could kill ponies simply by looking at them, and those that lived were driven to the depths of insanity. Hex invented all the different Great Old Ones and their cult followers. They were a flight of fantasy. They didn’t exist.

Only a madman would believe such tales.

Right?

Preparations and Execution

Three weeks passed slowly. My mind subconsciously checked the days off, the countdown clicking away the time before the disaster. It was like waiting for a nasty storm the pegasi had scheduled. You knew it was coming; there was no changing it. You knew it was going to be bad, but you couldn’t stop it. All you could do was wait, watching the clock tick time away.

All the while my attitude shifted up and down like a light switch. Some days I was excited and optimistic. I was expecting all sorts of awesome things to happen at the Gala that would open up an entirely new life for me. Life was great and beautiful and everything was going to turn out sunshine, smiles and rainbows.

Other times, the cruel reality set in. I was a loser and was going to stay a loser. I dreaded the Gala. I spent these days sicker than a dog and within galloping distance of the nearest bathroom. I feared what would occur when I met the princess, if I even did.

On the day of the Gala, I was at my desk. I focused more on my work now then any other day I had been there. Thoughts about the coming evening were kept at bay as I poured over lists of figures concerning a divorce. It was boring, but it was needed to keep me from imagining what would happen at the Gala. My last few nights alternated between nightmares involving Luna rejecting me to happy fantasies where we became a couple. Today was a down day though, and I could only focus on dark thoughts and misery.

I rubbed my eyes. These lists were hard to read. My eyes wandered over to the article I had pinned to my cubicle wall. I had looked at it probably a hundred times over the last three weeks. It was a simple thing; just an article talking about one of Princess Luna’s early appearances since her return, where she had presented diplomas to graduates of Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns. It even had a photo of her at the podium onstage.

I remembered that day well. After all the tests, the papers, the assignments, I was finally done.

I couldn’t be happier. I made a best friend, got a caretaker/assistant, got my cutie mark…

I passed. A diploma on stage from Princess Luna, up on stage, she was so cute…

The last thing I wanted to think about was that day!

I shook my head, making my mane even less tidy.

I focused my thoughts instead on the scroll I had received three weeks ago. Hex had asked me to bring it when we went shopping for formal attire the next day. He wanted to take a look, saying he knew who sent it. He smiled when I showed it to him, explaining it was just a prank his editor had done to drum up excitement for his next book. I accepted the explanation initially, but the more I thought about it, the more the whole thing bothered me. Every time I brought the letter up again, Hex would laugh it off. He told me to focus instead on the Gala, and what I would say or do to impress Princess Luna that will, “facilitate you two doing it.” (His words, not mine!)

I shook one more time and switched my focus back to the papers in front of me. I had more pressing matters to deal with.

The minutes and hours ticked away.

It was finally time.

I had dressed in a simple black tuxedo jacket with a red bowtie, combed my mane and tail so they were mostly straight, and was now in the carriage across from Hex Pen. He seemed just as formal and tidy as I was, save for his blue bowtie. I wondered if he chose it to match the blue flight suits the Wonderbolts wore.

As we rode along, I couldn’t help but feel ill. I was ready to throw up from the sheer dread of this night. In my mind, I saw it ending most likely horribly. All I had to do was suffer through it. Hex kept bringing up other topics, like his new book or the weather or, “hey, you look a little green. Oh wait! You’re always green! I’m hilarious!” As we rode closer, I seriously contemplated bucking him into the castle moat.

“I wonder how beautiful Spitfire is going to look in a dress…” Hex muttered for the bazillionth time.

Our carriage had reached the castle wall and was waiting in line behind several others. I moved my gaze away from the window and glared at him, saying, “Considering she’s always in her flight suit, I bet she’ll be in that.”

He smiled widely, “Then she’ll look great as always!”

That’s it. On the way back, he’s going in a ditch.

A thought occurred to me and I asked, “How did you get invited anyway?”

He seemed surprised, and replied, “I am THE talented author HP Lovecraft! One who was born to write stories to scare the sanity out of ponies! My cutie mark is the proof of my prowess and abilities! Why wouldn’t they invite me?”

Typical answers for Hex. Didn’t really answer my question, but I didn’t press the issue.

Another thought popped in my head. “Whatever happened to that scroll I gave you?”

Hex kicked the door open right as I finished and yelled, “This is gonna be THE BEST NIGHT EVER!”

Where in Equestria does he get this energy?

My sickness had not subsided as we entered the entrance hall of the Royal Palace. Hex was more excited than I had ever seen him, saying breathlessly, “I can’t believe it! The Grand Galloping Gala! The Wonderbolts! Spitfire! In person! I’ve seen a lot of their shows, but I mean, I’ve never been THIS CLOSE to meeting them in person, and isn’t this awesome, their show’s gonna start soon WE NEED SEATS!” Before I realized it, Hex had galloped at full speed through one of the doors leading out from the entrance hall.

I chased after him, but he was already long gone. I slowed to a stop and tried to catch my breath. My stomach was tightening, and I feared any more running would make me throw up.

“Was that the author, HP Lovecraft?” I heard somepony ask behind me.

I turned to reply, but whatever words I had died in my throat. It wasn’t just any pony that was standing there. It was a tall, pure white alicorn.

The ruler of Equestria, the sun princess, Celestia.

I opened my mouth to say something, anything! Everything I tried to say came out as garbled noise and stutters. Why did I have to be so awkward?!

She smiled, and said, “Relax Emerald Shine. You need to calm down, or else you won’t be able to enjoy the Gala.”

I stopped talking and simply nodded. “You…know, um, my name?” I asked, slowly piecing the question together with as few ums as possible.

She nodded, replying, “I’ve known your name since you came to my school.”

I’ve never met personally with the princess, even when I was at her school. The closest I had been was at my graduation…which I don’t want to bring up. It was surprising that she would know my name.

She looked over my head (it was weird being shorter than her.) and asked, “You’re still friends with Hex Pen, correct?”

I nodded immediately. I added, “He invited me.” Yes, I subtly worried she would kick me out.

She looked down at me again with a kind smile and said, “I’m glad to hear that. Perhaps you can get him to introduce you to my sister, if you can find her.”

“That sounds- wait, what?!” I gasped.

She seemed surprised, saying, “HP didn’t tell you? Princess Luna is a fan of his. She was the one that insisted he be invited.”

SON OF A MULE. Talented author my flank, the bastard was invited because LUNA likes him! Note to self: KILL HIM.

“Are you alright?” Celestia asked.

Drat, I suck at hiding my emotions! I shook my head, put on a smile, and said, “Yes, I’m just a little surprised that one of HP’s fans would turn out to be the dear Princess Luna. It is interesting, considering the legends surrounding Nightmare Moon mention the stars similar to Lovecraft tales. I didn’t think Princess Luna would want ponies to draw the connections.”

There was an odd pause. Celestia seemed taken aback.

Oh no, I brought up a touchy subject! WHAT THE HAY DUDE? I immediately bowed and apologized.

She shook her head and said, “No need, the connections were bound to be made.”

I nodded. I felt terrible, like I just brought up some festering secret that never should be mentioned. Or maybe it just seemed that way to me.

She brought her head closer to mine as she said; “I suggest you do not speak of that subject with my sister. Also, be warned if there are any repeats of last time, you will be imprisoned before sunrise.” Her expression startled me. She was deadly serious. Coming from the ruler of Equestria, those words didn’t feel like a simple warning. They were a threat.

Before I could say anything else, the Princess stepped back and said, “It’s nice to see you again, please enjoy yourself tonight.” With that, she turned and trotted away to greet other guests.

I need to find Hex.

My stomach lurched. I snapped my mouth shut tight.

Maybe a bathroom first...

Opening Gambit

A crack of thunder reverberated off the walls, signaling the beginning of the Wonderbolt’s show. I had stopped off at the bathroom before looking for Hex, but my pit stop had taken longer than expected. The stress of meeting Celestia and her threat had pushed me over the limit. I had just enough time to find a bathroom before throwing up.

It’s completely normal! It is understandable to feel nervous before the Princess, and even more normal to feel sick when she subtly threatens your life! I’m not a wimp or anything.

Now clean and vomit-free, I was ready to meet up with Hex.

If I could only find him…

“HEY!”

I had been galloping through empty passages trying to find my way outside when I turned a corner too quickly and slammed right into a light blue mare. I didn’t react in time to avoid the collision, even after she had yelled at me.

I shook the stars out of my eyes and got back on my hooves. I reached out a hoof to help her up and I got a better look at her. She was an earth pony, her mane was a darker blue and her eyes a light pink.

“Sorry, are you alright?” I asked as she got back up.

She opened her mouth to reply, but froze. I tilted my head. This was weird.

She immediately backed away several steps and said, “You’re…you’re his friend, aren’t you? You’re one of the Keepers!”

Eh? ‘Keepers’?

“Uh…I think you have me confused with somepony else…” I said slowly.

“No!” she shouted, “You aren’t going to stop me!” She was hysterical. She looked on the verge of tears. I started to reply, but she shouted me down, “NO! You can’t stop me! The stars are right! Tonight, the alicorn sisters will fall, and the age of Cthulhu shall begin!”

Eh?

Before saying anything else, she drew a stone dagger from her dress with her teeth. I immediately began stepping away slowly. She advanced towards me, the black dagger mirroring my expression of panic on its glassy surface.

Now, I will be the first to admit I am a coward. I may run my mouth, but I can’t back it up physically. When push comes to shove, I run like hell.

She had backed me into a corner though. I needed to distract her. Then I could escape.

“What are you talking about, I’m just a lawyer’s assistant! I’m not trying to stop anyone!” I cried. Lame, yes. Anything to keep her from killing me.

She replied, but it came out a muffled and garbled. Hard to talk with a mouthful of dagger handle. She dropped it and repeated, “You’re Lovecraft’s friend! You’re a Keeper, just like him! You won’t stop our plans!”

“What the buck is a Keeper? I have no idea what you’re talking about!”

“Don’t lie! You work for the Princesses! You were talking to Celestia earlier! You’re here undercover to stop me!”

“I’m not here to stop anyone! I got invited as a guest!”

“Liar! You and your damn agency keep stopping Their revival! We know a message went missing, we know you would show up to stop us!”

“What-” wait, why am I still talking to this nutjob?

I quickly grabbed the dagger with my magic and lifted it into the air. She immediately jumped back as the blade swiped at her.

I didn’t want to hurt her, just get her away. I swung it through the air in front of her a few times to get her to back up. I pushed her back into an alcove, using the dagger to ensure she can’t escape.

What should I do now? Get a guard? "Don't move. Once I get someone, you'll be locked up somewhere far away from here."

She smiled at me and replied, “The stars are right. You will fail, Keeper.”

She opened her mouth wide, revealing a blinking light on one of her back teeth.

There was a spy movie I saw once where the good guys had captured an enemy agent. They were going to interrogate him, but before they could he opened his mouth to reveal a detonator wired to one of his teeth. A quick snap shut, and the spy burst into flames.

I panicked. I jumped back just as she snapped her mouth shut.

The explosion was on par with the fireworks I had seen earlier. The force of the blast sent me flailing down the corridor. I slammed into the ground and rolled a few feet before finally stopping. My vision blurred as the flames burned bright, incinerating the mad mare. Even if she was screaming, the ringing in my ears prevented me from hearing it. I tried to get up, but my body wouldn’t comply. Slowly, darkness crept across my vision and I blacked out.

“Oi! Emerald!”

Argh…

“Emerald! Are you alright?”

Hex’s voice sounded distant.

I started to come back slowly. I could feel the aches in my body where I hit the ground. I opened my eyes and blinked. My vision was really blurry, but I could still make out Hex standing over me.

“Dude, you get drunk already?” Hex jokingly asked.

I rubbed my eyes and said, “N…no…it was…the blast…”

“Blast?” Hex sounded surprised.

I nodded, adding, “The…the mare was strapped with…explosives…” I looked at him and added, “She…flipped out…” I pointed a hoof down the hallway before me. It was too blurry to make out, but I’m sure the blast left a pretty big mess.

Hex’s eyebrow raised and he said slowly, “Yeah…what?”

I rolled onto my side and winced. I wasn’t too hurt, but I was going to be sore later. I didn’t feel like I was bleeding anywhere. I shifted and started to get to my hooves. “The blast” I repeated, “I ran into this mare…”

Hex looked down both ends of the hallway and said, “I don’t see anypony. She knocked you out?”

Standing, I blinked the blurriness away and said, “No…I mean yeah. I ran into her, and she started saying some weird stuff, claimed I was…something…my head is killing me…” I looked down the hall and said, “She set off some sort of explosive…killed herself…”

Looking down the hallway now, I can see why Hex is skeptical.

I scanned the hallway in shock. It looked completely normal. No burns, no scorch marks, no corpse, nothing! The walls were a clean white, the rug was pristine; everything was intact.

“But…” I muttered, “where…there was an explosion…”

Hex seemed concerned, “Are you ok? You’re acting really weird.”

My head pulsed painfully as the memories came back. I cleared my throat and explained, “I ran into some mare. She started acting weird, saying ‘the stars are right’ and ‘you won’t stop us’ and other crazy stuff. She pulled a knife on me!”

Hex simply looked at me like I was the crazy one.

I walked down the hall, scrutinizing everything as I passed. I continued, “I got it away from her, backed her into a corner. She opened her mouth…there was some…device…on her tooth. When she closed her mouth, BOOM!”

Even as I spoke, I began to doubt my story. There simply was no evidence to back me up. I expected to find something, but there was nothing. It was a fiery explosion; it should have scorched everything around it. Even me!

I quickly looked over my coat and tuxedo. A little ruffled, but neither showed any signs of fire damage.

Hex put a hoof on my shoulder. He sounded concerned as he said, “Are you ok? You sound like you hit your head and had some weird dream.”

What is going on? That had happened, right?

I ran into a mare. She flipped out. Threatened me with a knife. Blew herself up before she could say anything coherent.

It was real.

Ain't That a Kick in the Head?

“Look, you probably just slipped, hit your head, passed out, had a weird dream,” Hex said dismissively, “You tend to daydream. What’s to say this wasn’t a dream?”

I doubted my own memory. Hex was right; I daydream a lot. I found my life boring, so I routinely escaped into dreams and fantasies. It was entirely possible that I had imagined the whole thing.

But it seemed so real. I didn’t buy it.

“Hey, focus!” Hex ordered. He led me through a door back into the main ballroom. The party was still in full swing. Even more evidence that I was going insane. Had it all been in my head?

CRACK!

Hex hit me!

“FOCUS,” he growled, “Stop thinking so much or your brain will short out.”

I sighed. It was possible the whole thing was imagined…but it didn’t feel like that. The mare had mentioned, ‘We know a message had gone missing.’ Could that have been the letter I got weeks ago?

“What happened to that letter I gave you?” I asked Hex. I remember he didn’t answer earlier when I asked.

He groaned loudly and said, “Am I going to have to smack you again?”

“Be serious. I just had a run-in with a nut who tried to kill me,” I replied.

He rolled his eyes and said, “AGAIN, maybe you imagined it.”

I persisted, “I got a weird letter. The mare mentioned a message went missing. She knew I talked with Princess Celestia after you ran off.”

Hex stopped and stared at me, “You ran into the Princess?!”

I waved my hoof and said, “Yes, but that’s not important! This mare was watching me! She said something about bringing down the princesses! THIS IS SERIOUS!!” My voice had risen to a shout, causing several ponies around to stare.

Hex sighed and said quietly, “Look. You need to calm down. Put it out of your head, and we’ll talk later about it.”

I took a deep breath and tried to relax.

Hex started walking again, and said, “We’ll talk later, ok?”

I shrugged and followed him. He wasn’t in the mood to discuss it, so it will have to wait until later. There was no use forcing it.

“Cheer up dude!” Hex said, punching me lightly on the shoulder, “You ran into Princess Celestia! That’s pretty cool! Plus, you’re gonna meet Princess Luna in a second or two! One more, and you’ll meet the whole set!”

Huh?

HUH?

Lost in my thoughts, I failed to realize where Hex was leading me. We had crossed the ballroom and exited out onto a large terrace overlooking the valley below. There, standing in the moonlight in a beautiful ice blue dress that matched her mane, was Princess Luna. Any thoughts having to do with the odd situation I was in quickly vanished.

“I ran into her at the Wonderbolts show! I figured I’d introduce you-“ Hex stopped when I began walking back the way we came. I got three steps before Hex popped into existence between the door and me.

I quickly came up with an excuse, “Sorry, I don’t think I can meet her! I have to…go…” Think of something you moron! “It’s getting pretty late…and…Moorfrost! Yeah! She’s staying up for me, and I feel bad staying out late. She’s so nice to me.”

Hex’s eyebrow arched. He wasn’t buying it. He grinned darkly and said, “Emerald Shine! I’m surprised! Are you nervous about meeting the love of your life? The one you’ve been obsessing over for…what, half a year? Don’t worry! I’m here to help break the ice!” Suddenly, Hex’s magic surrounded me and spun me back towards Luna. “Who knows,” His evil grin had returned, “You might even get laid!”

Why was I friends with him again?

I stood rooted to the spot. There she was. The longer I looked at her, the more beautiful she seemed to become. Sure, I could go talk to her. It’d be totally normal. Say hi, chat a little, nothing big. What’s the worst-

GRADUATION CEREMONY.

My eyes widened in shock. Yes, it could be a repeat of that! My eye twitched. Oh no…what if she remembers me?!

“Hello?” Hex asked, waving his hoof in front of my face.

I didn’t blink. The scenario I was watching in my head had my attention.

She’ll recognize me.

Celestia appears.

She’ll protect Luna.

Banished to the Sun.

I felt Hex starting to push me slowly towards Luna. He said, “Whatever worst case scenario you have in your head won’t happen. Just go talk to her!” His light tone sounded to me like a horrible omen.

I dug my hooves into the stone as I said, “She’s not going to like me. Better to have loved and lost and however that saying goes.”

Hex groaned and said, “That saying really doesn’t apply. Just go talk to her.”

We were getting closer. Slowly. My vision started spinning. It always did that when I was panicking. I can’t do this!

“She’s talking to those guys! We’ll come by later when she’s free.” I replied.

“So? Those guys look like tools. I bet they have the IQ of brain-dead plankton. Be more interesting!”

“Uh…But…”

“NOT LISTENING LALALALALALA!”

“Please don’t do this.”

“TOO LATE!”

With that, Hex gave me a final shove.

With that, I was stumbling towards Luna.

Stumbling towards…

MY DESTINY.

Apparently my destiny was to stumble face first into the side of the stallion talking to Luna.

“Hey!” the stallion barked as I picked myself up from the floor. I blinked the stars out of my eyes. It felt like I ran into a brick wall. He shoved me hard and said, “Watch where you’re goin’ chump!”

“Oh! Uh…” I muttered. I hadn’t any idea what to do next. I considered my predicament before saying anything. The two stallions were solidly built earth ponies who looked like they spent a lot of time working out. Hex had taken a few steps back and was watching the situation from a safe distance with a smile on his face. Luna looked somewhat surprised and…wait, was she smiling? I must be imagining – no, she is smiling! Subtle, but it’s there.

That’s all the motivation I needed to pull a stupid move.

“You wanna start somethin’?” The dark orange stallion took my pause and shifty look as a sign of some resistance on my part.

“Start something? Ha!” I blurted out, “No. I intend to…end…something. Like you!”

Oh hey look! It’s me trying to take on two solidly built and athletic stallions in an effort to impress a pretty mare!

This isn’t going to end well.

They started laughing. Had it not been me in this position, I would be laughing too. “Oooh! You must think you’re a big shot to talk like that!” The other stallion, his coat a dark blue, jeered.

“Watch your tongue…” Peasant? Nah, I needed something with more punch and authority…cur? Foal? “Foal!”

That didn’t faze them. “Alright tough pony. I’m gonna kick your flank right here and teach you some manners,” the orange pony yelled as he reared back on his hind legs. I couldn’t react fast enough to dodge; the double hoof hit sent me rolling back in pain.

I came to an abrupt stop after a few rolls. I was lifted back on my hooves by Hex’s levitation magic. He stepped forward, his horn glowing a soft brown, and said aloud, “I apologize for the Master’s behavior.”

Hex! Whew. Glad I could get some…what is he doing?

“Oh yeah? Ya think?!” The blue stallion shouted. Both were advancing on Hex and myself menacingly.

Hex stood his ground, explaining, “Again, I apologize. Master Lovecraft has let his recent success go to his head. I fear he may use some nasty spell on you both if left unchecked.”

The stallions stopped. The orange one asked slowly, “Wait…Lovecraft? HP Lovecraft? The author?”

Hex smiled and replied, “Yes. His last expedition had him defeating a shambling monster from another dimension and saving the village of Stallion’s Gulch. However, the experience left him a little short with other ponies.”

The two stallions looked me up and down. The blue one said, “Nah, I don’t buy it.”

“Do you not see the mark of the Elder Sign?” Hex asked. His magic spun me around so my flank was visible to the stallions. There, set against my dark green coat, was a crudely drawn five-pointed black star with an eye set in the center. It was kinda weird having two stallions stare at my flank, but oh well. Hex continued, “The Elder Sign. It is the mark that grants Master Lovecraft the power to destroy those abominations that come from the stars. It is proof of his power!”

That hit must have made my brain stupid. It only just now clicked what Hex was doing. Man I’m clueless sometimes.

Hex advanced slowly towards the stallions, dragging me along with his magic. He bowed his head and said, “The master has private business with the princess. I ask that you humbly leave.”

The two stallions looked at each other, nodded and began to walk away. They looked a little fearful of what he had said about HP-er, me.

“Here,” Hex said as he handed me a handkerchief, “They got you pretty bad in the nose.” I guess I hadn’t noticed the sticky feeling and copper smell in my nose. Got me pretty good indeed.

“Thanks for the help,” I replied, dabbing my nose with the cloth.

He shrugged and smiled, “No problem. Just don’t impersonate me too often.”

I chuckled. Hex Pen can be a good guy sometimes.

“I thank thee for thy assistance,” A mare’s voice came from behind Hex. Hearing it, Hex stepped away and dropped into a full bow. I quickly wiped my nose and shoved the handkerchief in my pocket before bowing as well.

Time to meet Princes Luna. Weird stuff has happened, but forget it. Stay cool. Be confident, charming, suave, and stop panicking! Am I freaking out? Yes, yes I am. I can totally do this. Just talk to her, make friends, then something, something, BAM! Love.

The princess spoke first.

“I AM LUNA, PRINCESS OF THE NIGHT. IT IS A PLEASURE TO MEET THEE.”

I flinched. I’m not used to being yelled at. By my boss, yes. This was different and wholly odd. Did I do something wrong? Why is she yelling at me?

Hex stifled a giggle. He shouted back cheerfully, “HI LUNA! IT’S ME, HP LOVECRAFT!”

Why is he shouting back? Did she lose her hearing at the Wonderbolts’ show? What is going on here?!

“THIS,” Hex shouted, turning towards me and shouting in my ear, “IS MY FRIEND, EMERALD SHINE! I WAS TELLING YOU ABOUT HIM EARLIER!”

Sweet mercy, my ears! Dude, we’re less than ten feet from each other!

“IT IS A JOY TO MEET THEE, EMERALD SHINE!” Luna shouted, extending her hoof towards me.

I hadn’t said a word, and the conversation had already gone off the rails. Must be a new record for me.

“Uh…It’s nice to meet you as well, “ I replied. Should I have shouted back? Nah. I shook her hoof lightly and asked, “If I may ask, is there a reason that you’re shouting?”

“WELL EMERALD, IT’S-” Hex started yelling, but I shoved my hoof over his mouth to silence him.

“You, I understand,” I said darkly, “And you should be ashamed.”

Hex shoved my hoof away and said in a normal tone, “Why should I? I was just answering back.”

“You were making fun of her,“ I replied. Hex’s manners were severely lacking sometimes.

Hex voice dropped to a serious tone, “No, it is you who should be ashamed. How dare you not understand royal traditions?”

Before I could reply, Luna cleared her throat and explained, “It is the traditional Royal Canterlot Voice. It is for addressing one’s subjects.” She looked down at the ground before adding, “I apologize, my thousand year absence has left me somewhat difficult to speak with.”

Now I felt horrible. Of course Princess Luna would act a little different. A thousand years is a long time and a lot has changed. I do feel ashamed. I bowed my head and apologized, “I’m sorry princess. I was not aware of your situation.”

“Now that the apologies have been passed around,” Hex piped up, cheery as always, “Princess, you should ask Emerald here about his dragon assistant!”

“Ah, yes. Is it true thy dragon was born with the ability to breathe ice instead of fire?” Luna asked excitedly.

“Uh…” I stuttered. I still felt hesitant about talking, fearful I may hit another conversational landmine. I gulped and replied, “Uh…yes…my dragon assistant was born like that.”

She gasped and said, “Incredible! Such mutations are exceedingly rare.”

“Yeah, don’t let her hear that though. It might go to her head.”

Luna laughed. Her laugh made me blush. Hex was grinning like mad at me. I must have looked stupid, but I didn’t care. Everything was going better than I expected.

I was brought out of happy daydreams when Luna asked, “I am curious, how did you and Hex become friends?”

I paused before speaking. I was subtly ensuring that I wouldn’t say anything foolish before explaining, “Well, Hex and I met when we were at Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns. He and I had to work together on a project and became friends.” I scratched the back of my head uncomfortably and added, “I had trouble making friends, and Hex weirded out most ponies. So we stuck together.”

Luna smiled and said, “Ah, so you two went to my sister’s school? I remember…wait.” She stopped and suddenly became silent. She looked at me like she was trying to remember something. “Have we met before?”

CELESTIA HAVE MERCY, SHE REMEMBERS.

I panicked, “N-No! We haven’t!” I waved a hoof in front of me and said, “Nope, nope, first time meeting!”

Luna opened her mouth to speak, but a male voice from behind me interrupted, “Princess Luna!”

I flinched. I immediately dropped flat onto the ground, cowering and cried, “I’M SORRY, I DIDN’T MEAN TO! IT WAS AN ACCIDENT!”

Silence filled the air. I shut my eyes. My worst nightmares were coming true.

I wonder how long it will take to fry on the Sun.

I heard somepony clear their throat behind me. The voice spoke again, “Princess Celestia would like to speak with you.” There was a slight pause and the voice said, “Lovecraft.”

I opened my eyes and looked behind me. Standing there was a royal Pegasus guard dressed in bright gold armor. He had a bright white coat and what looked like a blue mane and tail. His eyes though were a light green. He looked down at me and sneered, “Another one of your…henchmen, Lovecraft?”

I heard Hex chuckle as he trotted up to the guard and joked, “Come now Stonehoof, where are your manners? You scared him half to death!”

The guard, Stonehoof, looked at Hex and said, “Do not talk to me about manners, Lovecraft." He glared at Hex and repeated, “Princess Celestia would like to speak with her sister. You have no objections, correct?”

Hex glared back, a slight smirk on his face. He bowed his head slightly and said, “Of course. Why wouldn’t I?”

“The way I heard it, you and your little…group…thought that there was some sort of threat to the princesses. Some nonsense about stars,” Stonehoof replied.

Hex nodded and said, “You heard right. Glad to see you’re doing your job.”

Stonehoof leaned towards Hex and growled, “Do you have a problem with how the Royal Guard conducts it’s work?”

Hex chuckled, “No, no. You do good work. Like the Nightmare Moon Incident? Great job there.”

“That is enough!” Luna shouted, not quite the Royal Canterlot Voice, but close.

I got back on my hooves as Luna walked by me. She looked at Hex and ordered, “Still thy tongue, HP.”

Hex shrugged and replied, “As you wish, princess.”

Luna trotted towards Stonehoof and said, “I shall return once I have spoken with my sister.” She looked at me and smiled, “Please, calm thyself. I’d like to speak with thou once I return.”

I nodded slowly. With that, Luna turned and left with the guard back into the main ballroom.

Hex pat me on the back and laughed, “Not as bad as you thought, eh?”

“I have to leave before she gets back,” I said quickly.

Hex walked in front of me and protested, “No way! Things were going great! Sure, you could be a little less stiff, but still!”

I shook my head and replied, “WAS. WAS going great. It’s about to go downhill fast, and I’m bailing. She remembers me!”

Hex was silent.

“You’ve met her before?” He finally asked.

“OF COURSE I MET HER BEFORE! YOU DID TOO!” I shouted.

“Oh…really?” Hex asked. Is he just trying to annoy me?!

I gritted my teeth as I growled, “You forgot graduation?!”

Hex stared at me blankly.

My eye twitched. Did I have to say it?

Right before I could speak again, Hex suddenly burst into a wide smile. Then he started laughing.

He’s such a great friend; I can’t wait to find a place to hide his corpse.

“Oh my- HA HAHA! Oh jeez, how could I forget?! HA HAHA! Oh man! If she remembers, your flank is grass!” He could barely talk between fits of laughter, “You…and her…and…HA HAHAHA! Best moment ever!”

“I didn’t mean to, ok?! It happened by accident!”

Hex was giggling now, but stopped long enough to exclaim, “You punched her! In the face! POW! Right in the kisser!”

“I didn’t mean to! I flinched and I accidentally hit her!” I cried.

“Who flinches by throwing a right hook?”

“I zoned out and when I came back, I flinched! I was reaching for the diploma!”

“You hit her in the face! Did your brain shut off and you forget you’re a unicorn?”

“So…you’re THE Emerald Shine.”

Stonehoof must have returned while Hex and I were talking. How else would his voice seem to emanate from the spot directly behind me? I gulped and turned slowly to face him. If he seemed like a no-nonsense Pegasus before, his expression now only reinforced it. The expression sat between ‘controlled anger’ and ‘loathing.’

“What do you mean…THE Emerald Shine…?” I asked, trying to keep my voice level and calm and HE’S GOING TO KILL ME.

He narrowed his eyes. “It’s time for you to leave.” The sound of clanking metal announced the arrival of two more guards. I slowly backed away, already starting to panic.

Hex stepped between us and growled, “Sorry, but he is my guest. Back the hay down, Stonehoof.”

“The palace and those within it are under our jurisdiction, Lovecraft. Your little club has no say here.”

Hex chuckled smugly. “Wrong. He is my guest. He is under MY jurisdiction.”

Stonehoof was starting to lose his temper. He gritted his teeth and glared at me, “If I realized who you were, I would have barred you from entering when you arrived, let alone let you near Princess Luna.”

“Speaking of Luna, I wonder what she would say if she saw this?” Hex muttered. Stonehoof blanched at this. Hex grinned widely and said, “I’m sure she would love to hear how you kicked out the personal friend of her second-in-command. Mares love hearing that. Turns them on.”

Stonehoof shook his head and replied, “This is an order from Princess Celestia herself! We are to remove Emerald Shine from the castle, by force if necessary!”

“Why?” I blurted out.

“Princess Celestia has made the order. Though, I am glad to be throwing you out.”

Hex rolled his eyes and groaned. “Take the hint already! SHE. DOESN’T. LIKE. YOU.”

Stonehoof growled as he glared at Hex. “This has nothing to do with-”

“Oh come on! Celestia and Emerald here were chatting quite civilly earlier. If she wanted him gone, he wouldn’t have gotten past the entrance hall.”

“The princess is allowed to change her mind, especially when the safety of her sister is threatened!”

“Her sister’s safety? Come now Stonehoof, don’t you mean the safety of your little fantasy?”

Stonehoof turned bright red under his armor. Their argument was reaching the limit. I just hope Stonehoof doesn’t put his hoof through my teeth and claim I was resisting or something.

“That will be quite enough!”

Luna voice rang out across the terrace. Stonehoof and Hex immediately fell silent, though Hex’s smirk had returned. Luna trotted forward and stopped between Stonehoof and Hex. “My sister gave no such order,” she said simply.

Stonehoof cleared his throat. “I am acting in her best interest.”

“You admit your lie?”

“W-well…”

“My sister is worried for my safety, yes, but she respects my decisions. I hope you would do the same.”

Stonehoof bowed and said, “Forgive me, princess.” He rose and left, the two guards following silently behind him.

I let out my breath loudly and collapsed to the ground. Tonight was turning into a rather long night. I don’t how much more my heart could take before it gives out.

Hex laughed and raised his hoof to Luna, cheering, “Woo! Up high!”

Luna looked at it for a moment before slowly raising hers and tapping his lightly. Hex pumped his hoof and gave another triumphant shout.

“I cannot believe Stonehoof would try to remove Emerald from the castle,” Luna said.

Hex shrugged and chuckled, “Eh, it happens. What can you expect from the Royal Guard?”

Luna turned to Hex with a disapproving look on her face and said, “I wish you wouldn’t keep riling them up like that.”

Hex shrugged again and replied, “Sorry, it’s just too easy.”

I got back onto my hooves with a heavy sigh. The night had already gone back and forth between ‘Best Night Ever’ and ‘Please Let This Be a Dream.’ I wish it would stop on one and stay there. I can’t take this emotional roller coaster much longer!

And what the hay is going on between Luna, Hex, and Stonehoof?

“Are thou alright, Emerald Shine?” Luna turned and asked. I hadn’t noticed Hex trotting after Stonehoof, and now found myself absolutely alone with Luna. And no, I hadn’t figured out how to relax.

I quickly dusted myself off (what is this, the eighth time?) and said, “Yes, thank you. So you know who I am?”

Luna smiled and said, “Of course. It’s not every day one is hit in the face. Such a thing is hard to forget.”

My heart sank. This is terrible. She must hate me.

“Well…if you knew who I was…why’d you let me stay? I mean…I could be a nutjob or something…” I asked slowly.

Luna smiled again and said, “The past is the past. Hex said it was a rather funny accident.”

I take back anything bad I ever said about Hex Pen. He is the best friend a pony could ever have!

Hex apparently hung around long enough to hear us talking and shouted from the doors, “YOU TWO SHOULD JUST MAKE OUT AND GET IT OVER WITH ALREADY!”

You know, I think I might be able to hide his corpse under the floorboards of my apartment.

Respite

“What’s the deal with that Stonehoof guy?” I asked Hex when he returned and I had finished smashing him over the head with my hoof.

He wiped the blood from his face and replied simply, “He’s just an ass.”

“Hex! I hoped you would approach the situation more delicately,” Luna admonished.

Hex sighed and said, “Fine.” He turned to me and said, “Stonehoof is a captain of the Royal Guard. He’s pretty high up, and is on good terms with the princess. He IS kind of an ass though.”

Before Luna could chastise Hex again, I interrupted, “What’s up with the two of you?”

“Well, Stonehoof has a little problem with me. He’s probably attracted to me and doesn’t know to reconcile those feelings. You’d be surprised how often that happens,“ Hex explained with a smug grin on his face.

I rolled my eyes. I’m guessing it never happens.

“Ok. Different topic. You and Luna. How are you two connected?”

“What do you mean, connected? We just met a little-“

“You two know each other. Princess Celestia said her sister invited you personally.”

“Well, I am famous-“

“You’re her ‘second-in-command.’ You know each other!”

“I think you just misheard…”

Why is he still fighting this?

“I’m surprised Hex. I thought you would have told him, being friends and all,” Luna cut in.

Hex let out a deep sigh and groaned, “Luuuuuuuunaaaaa! What happened to the whole, ‘secret agency’ thing?”

Luna smiled, “Secrets between friends? I’m sur-“

Before Luna could finish, a mighty crash from the ballroom droned her out. I jumped three feet in the air and immediately dropped low to the ground. What the hay was going on?!

“C’mon Emerald!” Hex shouted as he galloped away. I felt the tug of his magic as he dragged me into the ballroom.

Inside, the ballroom was in a state of absolute chaos. Guests were running around, being chased by exotic birds and other odd animals. Royal guards were flying left and right to catch them. In addition to the animals, I also noticed a large sculpture had fallen over, and several of the columns were also toppled. Several ponies began fleeing the ballroom through a door on the opposite side.

It was pretty funny to watch.

“Man, we miss the best parties,” Hex whined next to me.

I scratched my mane and asked, “Uh…should we be doing something?”

Hex shrugged and said cheerfully, “Not our jurisdiction!” He puffed up his chest and said in a gruff voice, “The castle is under the jurisdiction of the Royal Guard! How dare you do anything! I’m an inconsiderate ass who thinks too highly of himself blargablargablarga!”

I found it hard not to stifle a chuckle at Hex’s little impersonation. But what he said only increased my curiosity about Stonehoof and Hex.

A cardinal landed on my head and began chirping loudly.

“He says a yellow Pegasus has been harassing them and the other animals in the gardens.” Luna had arrived in the ballroom and stood beside me.

I looked up at the cardinal (or tried to) and asked, “You speak bird?”

Luna smiled and said, “Over time, you pick up these things.”

“Princess! I’m not sure it’s safe for you to be here!” Hex shouted.

“So it’s safer we leave her alone on a terrace?” I asked.

“I am quite fine defending myself, Hex,” Luna sighed.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Hex sneered, swatting a few birds away with his hoof, “It’s just, you know, MY JOB.”

So it’s Hex’s job to protect Princess Luna? He’s not part of the Royal Guard, judging by what Stonehoof said.

So who is he with? Does this have to do with what that mare said?

Is he of the Keepers? Keepers of what?

“Uh…you ok Emerald?” Hex waved his hoof in my face.

I snapped out of my inner monologue.

The guards were finally calming down the ballroom, and the animals were being taken back to the gardens. Many of the guests were shaken; such high-class ponies rarely see such chaos. Luna had disappeared while I zoned out, having been summoned by her sister.

‘You alright? You’ve been acting out of it all night,” Hex asked.

I rubbed my eyes and said, “You know why I’ve been weird.”

Hex stayed silent. He was looking at me curiously. He only makes that look when he’s trying to figure out a problem.

The night had been nowhere near what I had expected. Between the mare, Stonehoof and Luna, I was exhausted.

“I hope you don’t blame him,” Luna said as she appeared by Hex, “All will be explained, in due time.”

“I don’t mean to offend, but I’d really like to go home and go to bed,” I sighed.

So Hex knew Princess Luna. Is that really a big deal? Of course it is! I never knew he led an organization. I thought he was just a writer.

That reminds me…what about that mare I ran into earlier? How was she connected to Hex, or his organization? She mentioned a letter…the same one I got weeks ago, perhaps?

What does-

“What is that?!” I muttered.

One last incident to round out the night.

Best night ever indeed.

The Stars Are Right

“What in the world…?”

I muttered those words absentmindedly. I already had an idea of what I was looking at. I just couldn’t believe it. This can’t be serious.

“It’s a shoggoth,” Hex said simply.

Hex’s books were known for containing bare descriptions. The monsters were abominations known for causing madness in ponies simply by looking at them. As such, the descriptions were often just enough to cause the reader to begin filling in blanks, usually creating a horror no words could describe.

And I was looking at it.

The columns…it was oozing from the columns…

They were hollow…and…that noise…!

Slopping…horrifying…disgusting…

“Snap out of it!” Hex’s hoof slapped across my face.

Chaos was running wild. What ponies were left in the ballroom were running for the exits. The thing…the shoggoth…was coming from the fallen columns. It looked like they were hollow, and no one noticed the pinkish fleshy ooze coming from them until it reached a pony…and consumed him.

“Get Luna and get out of here!” Hex shouted. He wasn’t joking anymore, this was him serious.

“I’m not leaving you to die here, Hex,” Luna immediately shouted back.

“Too bad. Emerald!”

I nodded and immediately pushed Luna towards the closest exit. If anyone could kill this thing, it was Hex.

The doors slammed shut before I could force Luna another step. And another. And another.

The exits were closed.

I galloped full speed and threw my weight into the door, only to bounce off with no effect.

I got myself up and said, “Luna, you need to get out of here! Blow open a wall or something!”

She shook her head and said defiantly, “No! I will not leave Hex here to be killed by that thing!”

“Look, if Hex is supposed to protect you, he’ll want to do his job and protect you. So will you please just break open a window and fly out of here!”

“What’s wrong with the doors?”

“They slammed shut in my face and refuse to open.”

“The windows won’t open either. No reason to try.”

I was confused, and panicking pretty badly.

“The stars are right. It was just as Hex and I feared,” Luna muttered. She turned back into the ballroom and gazed at Hex. I turned to look at him and gasped.

The thing had grown in size. But Hex wasn’t backing down. His horn glowing brightly, he was standing right in front of the monster.

A blast of light caused it to shrink back momentarily, but it advanced again. It started to surround him on all sides.

Luna was awestruck for a moment shorter than I. When I snapped out of it, she had already started galloping back towards Hex.

Instinct told me to stay. I’d probably live if I stayed far enough away.

But, I’m an idiot.

I caught up to Luna just as we had to jump over the shoggoth to get to Hex. Luna cleared it easily; I clipped it with my back hoof.

“Ugh, that’s…IT BURNS,” I screamed.

I collapsed on my side as my hoof that touched the shoggoth seemed to burst into flame. I shut my eyes tight, trying to bear it. The pain was excruciating, like that time I accidentally spilt acid on myself in class.

The pain subsided as quickly as it came. My hoof cooled.

“Try not to touch it. A shoggoth is nothing more than a moving, living stomach. It’s juices are highly acidic,” Hex’s voice lectured.

I opened my eyes and found it extremely dark…WAIT I WASN’T EATEN WAS I?!

I took a deep breath and was about to hyperventilate when I noticed Hex’s face in the gloom. He wasn’t smiling anymore. The light from his horn barely lit the grim expression he now wore.

It scared me.

Luna face came next, rising from where my hoof was. She thankfully healed it…or at the least stopped the pain.

“What happened to all the lights? We weren’t…” I started.

Hex shook his head, “No, but we may be shortly. I was able to throw up a shield just in time to protect the three of us.”

Hex's shield cast an extremely faint light brown glow. The shield was tiny, with barely enough room for Luna to stand. Beyond it, I couldn't see anything.

Luna’s horn glowed brighter, and a light blue bubble formed around us. Hex's shield beyond it began to flicker and crack.

I got to my hooves and asked, “So what happened to the-“

The words died in my mouth when Hex's shield disappeared. I thought maybe the roof had collapsed, or the lights went out, or I was eaten. It was worse. The shoggoth…the gooey monstrosity…it had surrounded Hex and when we jumped in was just as it attacked. Hex threw up a shield to protect us. The shoggoth attacked anyway.

On the other side of the barrier…the eyes…everywhere…I was stuck in a glass dome surrounded by a living stomach!

Hex stumbled slightly as his magic died away. He started coughing loudly. Between coughs, he muttered, “I hope we can keep this up until help arrives…”

“Why wouldn’t we?” I wondered aloud.

Hex looked at me (I think. Without his horn alight all he was to me was a dark shadow) and said, “Shoggoths are pretty strong. Dense. A lot of weight to try and keep back like this…a minute was too much for me and Luna can’t last forever.”

I looked over to Luna. She had her eyes closed tight, but beyond that showed little expression.

“So how do we get out of here? Teleportation?”

Hex shook his head and took a deep breath. “I don’t think I can get us to a safe place in the ballroom. Plus I can’t teleport multiple times in the speed necessary to get us all out alive. Luna can’t either. The moment she shifts focus to try, the barrier will likely shatter and we’d probably die.”

“Probably?”

“The chance is slight-“ Luna began, but the second she broke her concentration a crack appeared at the roof of the barrier. She stopped speaking and became expressionless once more.

“It’s not going to work. The best we can do is dig our hooves in and stay alive long enough for backup to arrive,” Hex sat down. His tone didn’t carry the usually light-heartedness that I knew him for.

I looked up. The eyes shifted left and right and up and down and around at dizzying speed. I tore my gaze away when my head started to pulse painfully.

“Help will come…right?” I asked.

“Yes,” Hex said quietly.

I heard a slight cracking sound coming from the shield. I looked up again and saw the cracks beginning to spread.

“Emerald!” Hex said loudly. His horn glowed brightly, illuminating his features. I could see the panic on his face.

He drew a small journal from his coat and dropped it in front of me. It glowed slightly as the pages opened and started flipping.

“I need you to help Luna by reinforcing the shield with your own,” Hex explained, the pages stopping. A lone symbol was scribbled onto the page. “Focus your mind on this rune, and you’ll produce a shield.”

“Uhh…” I looked down at the page. “I’m not really-“

“Now’s not the time to doubt yourself!” Hex yelled, “I can’t do it, Luna’s getting exhausted, and you’re the only other unicorn here! Focus for once in your life or…”

Hex fell silent. I took a deep breath and stared at the page.

To create a spell, you had to focus on the ‘structure’ of the spell. Basically, you had to visualize the desire result. For more potent and focused results, you could use a rune. Simply focus on the symbol, visualize it, and it will produce the spell. Best to know what spell is produced before you stare too hard at a rune!

I closed my eyes. The symbol floated in my mind.

Now focus…

Visualize…

Focus…

I strained my mind as I forced my thoughts to stay locked.

We’re going to die…

No! Focus!

Dead…

Focus!

DEAD.

I was losing it…

The cracking is getting louder!

I can’t do this! We’re going to die and it’s my fault because I’m a bucking useless unicorn!

“That spell will not save you. It will only stall the inevitable.”

Hex? No…the voice I just heard buzzed in my ears. It was like the person was whispering in my ear…way too close for comfort…I didn’t recognize it at all…

“Focus not on prolonging your life…instead: protecting it.”

A new symbol popped into my head. Instead of the odd squiggle from Hex’s book, a five-pointed star with an eye in the center.

I knew this symbol. My cutie mark.

It was comforting. Familiar.

“You know this symbol. Use it.”

I focused once more. It came easier, like I had done this hundreds of time before. It was automatic, like breathing.

The power was building in my horn. I could feel the magic burning at the tip. I’d never been able to pull off anything like this before, well, not on purpose.

I opened my eyes.

The bubble was gone. The shoggoth had shrunk back. Hex was looking at me with a surprised look on his face, his mouth hanging open slightly. Luna was…I couldn’t tell. She was looking at me…like…she…it looked kinda like she was waiting.

I spared them a single look before focusing on the shoggoth.

The eyes were no longer whizzing around frantically. They were all fixed on me.

I dropped my head and aimed my horn at the largest section before me.

A beam of light shot from my horn. The shoggoth…it made this squelching noise…and it started to turn darker. Where my magic had hit, the shoggoth looked to have a dark burn. Within a few moments, the dark color began to spread outward. The shoggoth’s skin turned from a wet dark pink to a dry crusty black.

It was hardening.

The shoggoth kept making that squelching noise. As the color spread, it began separating itself, moving away from the damaged part.

I felt myself grin.

I lowered and fired again. Another section began to turn black.

It separated again, trying to stay alive. I suppose each smaller part was able to operate alone…or something…

Whatever! Thing tried to eat me, it’s gonna die!

I fired again. Another dying blob.

It separated.

I turned and blasted another section.

It separated.

My grin grew bigger.

I fired. And another. And again. And how about some more? Gonna keep separating? I’ll just keep going! Again. And another. And some more. And another.

It couldn’t separate fast enough. I wasn’t waiting for it to run, I wasn’t trying to keep it at bay; I was exterminating it.

All that was left was a single pinkish red blob with a single eye. Everything else was black and dry and dust.

I trotted over to it and stood over it. I grinned like a madman. It looked up at me and made that noise again. I wouldn’t be surprised if it was a whimper of fear.

One last shot.

I let out a sigh as the power flowed away.

I turned and looked back at the center of the ballroom. Luna and Hex hadn’t moved. I took a step towards them.

Was I always this heavy?

I collapsed onto my side. My vision blurred for the second time in the night as I heard Hex shouting my name.

Best night ever.

A Night To Forget

I hate hospitals.

It’s not the fact ponies die there.

It’s the smell.

Needles too. I hate needles.

I took a deep breath and blinked the sleepiness away. Nightmares were never fun, but the last collection seemed to linger and weigh on my mind. I pushed them away as I considered my surroundings.

The machines around me seemed like standard medical equipment meant to ensure I stayed alive. I can’t tell much beyond that, I never really bothered with medicine. Just take the meds and shut up, that’s what I always did.

I lifted my head to look at one of the monitors and found I couldn’t move. Attempting to lift my hoof to check why was also impossible.

Waking up strapped to a hospital bed is not good.

At least I could see around the room a little. Not that there was much to see beyond the machines and a door. Not even a window.

The door opened loudly, announcing the arrival of an orange pony in a lab coat, “Good to see you’re finally awake!” He trotted over to the machine on my left, a clipboard floating behind him glowed a light orange color.

“Don’t worry, I’m just taking down all your vitals. Nothing to worry about,” he smiled. He must have noticed my apprehension.

A stool slid over to the side of my bed. The doctor sat down on it as he said, “My name is Dr. Sawbones. Doc Saw for short.”

I opened my mouth to speak and instead ended up coughing a lot of gunk up.

A small handkerchief cleaned my face immediately, and the doctor continued, “Please take it easy. You’ve been in a coma for quite some time. If you push yourself, you may end up getting hurt.”

“Coma…?” I grumbled, my voice scratching the sides of my throat.

“Ah…yes, you’ve been…unconscious for some time,” Sawbones said slowly, “Before I explain, I need to ask you some questions to check for any memory loss.”

The clipboard floated down as Sawbones asked, “Do you remember your name?”

I went to nod, but immediately remembered I couldn’t, “Emerald…Shine.”

He nodded with a smile and asked, “Where did you grow up?”

“An orphanage…” I coughed loudly, “On the outskirts…of Canterlot…”

“Good…and what is your current address?”

I wheezed, “A block away…from Lunar Square…in the Friendship Arms Apartment Complex…Apartment…301…Canterlot…”

“Good…now,” as he asked, the quill on his clipboard straightened up, “What do you remember right before you woke up here?”

“I…” I began, but stopped. I felt like I remembered, but every time I went to grab the memory it drifted further away. Trying to remember anything kept drawing blanks. All I could remember was Moorfrost nagging me about my bowtie. Why was I wearing a bowtie?

My head pulsed painfully. I squeezed my eyes and mouth shut tightly. If I could have moved, I would probably be writhing and shouting obscenities. It felt like a jagged rock was shifting around in my skull.

The pain disappeared quickly. I blinked the spots out of my eyes. The machines were beeping like mad and Sawbones’ quill was scratching away.

“I…I can’t…” I muttered, blinking away tears.

Sawbones leaned over and put his hoof on my shoulder, “It’s ok, that’s why I’m here. We expected some memory loss when you awoke. Alcohol poisoning on this scale is extremely dangerous you know!”

“What?” I asked, completely bewildered by his last statement.

He looked down at his clipboard and said, “Alcohol poisoning. You were brought in after passing out on the way home. You drank yourself into such a stupor…well, it took five days for you to wake up!”

“Five days?” I repeated.

Sawbones nodded.

“I don’t remember anything,” I said simply.

I heard the rustle of paper as a newspaper floated in front of me.

“Maybe this will jog your memory,” Sawbones said, “It’s from the day after you were brought in.”

It was a copy of the Canterlot Chronicle. A single article reporting on the Grand Galloping Gala the night before took up the entire front page. I quickly looked over a summary at the top:

CATASTROPHE AT THE GALA

For years, the Grand Galloping Gala has been regarded as the premiere event in the social calendar of Canterlot. This year’s Gala will most likely go down as one those who attended would like to forget. We present here a short list of our stories covered in the following pages.

• Prince Blueblood claims a cake-covered maniac attacked him. Witnesses do corroborate the prince’s story, but several claim the prince brought it on himself when he grabbed the nearby unicorn and used her as a shield to protect himself from a flying cake.

• A cyan Pegasus is accused of property damage. The Pegasus tried to save a large statue from falling over, but instead caused several thousand bits worth of damage and endangered several bystanders. Princess Celestia has already pardoned her however.

• A yellow Pegasus is accused of causing an animal uprising. The Pegasus was trying to capture several of the rare animals on the castle grounds, causing several to flee into the Gala, creating panic amongst the guests. She has also been pardoned.

• An apple vendor and a pink pony are wanted for cake-related assault. The illegal vendor had created the cake and wheeled it into the main ballroom when a pink pony dived off the stage and landed on the cart, sending it flying towards Prince Blueblood. Questions remain as to whether the ponies caused an accident or were part of an insidious cake based assassination.

• A green unicorn had to be removed from the grounds for drunken behavior. The unicorn drank several bottles of hard apple cider before arriving and had to be removed after approaching Princess Luna and making several distasteful remarks. After he was determined to be drunk, the guards removed him. Princess Luna will not press charges.

• A runaway carriage crushed a blue pony shortly after the Gala. A stallion was tying himself in when it came loose and rolled down a hill, striking and killing the mare. The incident has been ruled an accident, though the investigation continues.

• Four ponies were killed after their carriage veered off Sunset Bridge. The cause is linked to a faulty wheel that came loose, causing the carriage to drag to the right. The stallions pulling attempted to compensate, but were unable to as the carriage veered the opposite direction and off the side. The carriage was submerged in the water for fifteen minutes before several bystanders pulled it out. An investigation has yet to conclude whether it was accidental or possible sabotage.

I read over the articles. As I did, I felt something come back to me. All at once, the night came rushing back in fragmented pieces.

I was nervous. I got myself a bottle and took a few swigs to relax.

I hopped into the carriage with Hex. I took another few swigs as he tried to calm me.

We arrived. I greeted Princess Celestia and nearly fell over when I bowed.

I ran into a mare. I can’t tell what I said, but she seemed offended.

I downed the bottle. The night wasn’t going well for me.

I stumble to Luna. I said something to her, got too close. Guards pulled me away.

The carriage was spinning. I slid over in the seat and blacked out.

Sawbones pulled the paper away. He asked, “Now, what do you remember?”

I paused as the memories floated through my mind again. I opened my mouth to speak, but closed it immediately. Something didn’t fit about the memories.

I don’t drink. I like regular apple cider, but the hard stuff has an edge from the alcohol that I don’t like. So I never really drink. Also, despite being wasted, the memories were pretty clear. Even when I’m falling over and can barely stand, the memories are as clear as film. I've never been drunk, but shouldn't it be less clear what happened?

Wait…didn’t...I was just told something like this, wasn’t I? Alhazred had said…something about me not getting removed from the Gala early…

“What do you remember?” Sawbones repeated, a tone of force in his question.

Alhazred said I wasn’t removed from the Gala early…that I hadn’t been drinking…

He saw this coming! How is that possible? Was it just a lucky guess? Who is he anyway? WHAT is he?

I noticed out of the corner of my eye Sawbones was looking at me oddly. His eyes were narrowed, as if he was scrutinizing my every twitch. The expression on his face reminded me of a teacher ready to punish a student for misbehavior.

“What do you remember?” Sawbones wasn't asking anymore, he was demanding an answer.

“I…barely remember...most of the Gala…” I muttered.

The quill stopped.

“I can’t believe I got so…drunk…I remember making an ass of myself in front of the Princesses…”

The beeping from the machines picked up slightly. Sawbones shook his head with a sigh. The quill scratched heavily across the paper.

That’s not good.

“It seems we have a small problem, Mr. Shine,” Sawbones said as he stood and walked back towards the door.

I started to panic, “That’s all I remember!”

Sawbones didn’t respond. The door swung shut behind him as he left.

I licked my lips nervously. I just realized I was rather thirsty.

Oh, and I’m freaking out about the fact I’m in an isolated room being interrogated by some quack.

I have to get out.

I try to lift my head, my fore legs, my hind legs, anything to loosen the bonds. Nothing. I’m strapped down so tight I can’t move at all. My magic won't work at all. Every time I try to focus, nothing happens.

My only plan failed.

I stopped and tried to relax.

What’s going to happen now? He kept asking me about what I remember. All I can remember is getting drunk at the Gala. But Alhazred said that was a lie. He said I was attacked by a-

My head threatened to split apart as pain shot through my body. The machines went crazy, beeping and flashing like mad.

Hex was being a pervert about Spitfire during the ride. I was sick.

Princess Celestia greeted me. She warned me about mentioning the stars to Luna.

I ran to a bathroom to throw up from nerves.

I ran into a mare on the way back. She flipped out.

“The stars are right. You will fail, Keeper.”

There was an explosion. I got knocked out.

Hex found me. There wasn’t any evidence of an explosion.

Hex thought I was crazy. Led me out to a balcony.

I got in a fight. Lost. Hex saved my flank.

Luna talks at level eleven.

She was nice! Stonehoof was a dick.

Stonehoof hated Hex. Hex hated Stonehoof.

Stonehoof knew me. Hex told him off.

Luna stopped him. She was kind, despite what happened.

Screams. A mass of flesh and acid. “It’s a shoggoth.”

We couldn’t get out. Luna wanted to help Hex.

We were trapped. About to die. I couldn’t do it.

The Elder Sign.

I turned it to dust. Collapsed again.

I wheezed heavily as the pain subsided. The images rushed through my head at high speeds, little more than blurs. But I comprehended and understood what had happened instantly.

I had fought and defeated a shoggoth to save Hex and Luna.

“You look like hell Emerald.”

Hex was sitting on the stool by my bed. Sawbones was standing behind him. They must have come in when I was zoned out.

He grinned when he saw me looking back, “You really are being a problem, aren’t you Emerald?”

I had a million questions. I knew which to start with.

“Who are the Keepers?”

The Keepers of the Night

“So what do you actually remember?” Hex asked in response.

“Everything,” I answered curtly, “And then some.”

Hex groaned, rubbing his eyes in frustration, “Emerald, Emerald, Emerald…a one in five chance and you win the loony lottery.”

Hex rose to his hooves and started pacing in and out of my vision at the foot of my bed.

“I can probably guess what you remember,” he began.

“You remember two versions of the night. In one, you started drinking before I arrived. Hoping to gain a charisma boost, trying to calm your nerves, whatever the reason, you drank yourself stupid. You embarrassed yourself in front of Princess Celestia, you said some naughty things to Princess Luna, and you threw up all over yourself, just to name a few highlights.

“Plausible, right? Believable?” A small smile appeared on his face with these words like he was trying to lead me into some joke. It scared me. I don’t know why, but the look was simultaneously familiar and so unlike him.

“On the other hoof…” Hex continued, “You also remember a different series of events for the night. But you gotta wonder…did that night really happen? After all, you remember running into Blue Sky in the first memory, but this time she detonates an explosive charge that nearly kills you! The best part? You wake up to find no evidence whatsoever!

“This time, you do meet Luna, and you do have a rather pleasant conversation. She was pretty nice, even though you hit her when you originally met oh so long ago at our graduation.”

HP began grinding his teeth as he growled, “You even met that fffffffff-annoyance, Captain Stonehoof.

“Yet…that wasn’t all that happened…was it Emerald?” Hex said slowly, stopping at the foot of my bed. He became quiet, staring off into space.

I stayed silent. Hex didn’t want an answer. He knew the answer already. This was his little performance.

“And then…” he said quietly.

“And then…” he repeated slightly louder.

“And then…” again, this time at normal volume.

A twisted, toothy smile appeared on his face. He nearly screamed, “And then! A shoggoth! A shoggoth in the main ballroom! How crazy is that! How insane! How MAD! Such a story couldn’t have happened, couldn’t be true!”

He began laughing, a laugh devoid of anything resembling joy. It was the kind that made your coat crawl, the kind that comes after the evil villain has explained their master plan to destroy the world, the kind you would expect to hear coming from a murderer standing over a fresh kill.

Hex calmed down slowly, the laughter dying down into a small chuckle before becoming silence. He took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, running his hoof through his mane as he trotted back to his seat and sat down.

“So tell me Emerald,” He asked slowly, “Which one is the truth?”

I was scared. I have never seen Hex act like this before.

But I didn’t hesitate, “The shoggoth. Stonehoof. Luna. The mare. That’s what happened.”

“Are you sure?”

I looked Hex in the eye as best I could (I was still strapped down after all) and said, “I have no doubts.”

Hex sighed deeply. He closed his eyes.

Silence filled the air. The only noise was the low hum and occasional beep coming from the machines I was hooked up to. Hex seemed to be thinking; he gets like this whenever he has to make a decision he considers ‘serious.’ All other times he usually just goes with the first choice that pops into his head. Sawbones hadn’t moved very much from where he was standing, observing silently.

But it was he that finally spoke and broke the silence, “Director, might I ask what you are thinking?”

Hex shook his head. His hoof began tapping the floor. He didn’t respond beyond that.

After another short silence, Sawbones said, “You know there isn’t anything that can be done.”

Hex shook his head again. The tapping became louder and more forceful. I knew better than to bother him. Did Sawbones?

Nope.

“Captain Stonehoof said that-” he began.

Hex suddenly stomped his hoof loudly, exclaiming, “I don’t give two bucks what Stonehoof wants! This falls under my prevue, as part of the Incident Clean-Up standard operating procedure! If I deem him sane, he’s free to leave!”

Sawbones posture immediately straightened and stiffened. His mouth clamped shut and his eyes widened. He looked scared.

“And if I recall correctly,” Hex continued loudly, “Emerald here took down a shoggoth three times the size of any we have seen before. He saved not only my life, but Princess Luna’s as well.”

He looked back at Sawbones, “Considering he isn’t drooling out of the side of his mouth and hasn’t shown any major indicators, I think my analysis is not only correct, but completely valid as well.”

Sawbones gulped and stuttered, “Y-yes, but the…the princess wanted to ensure…”

Hex waved his hoof impatiently, “Yeah, yeah, bias and blah blah blah.”

He turned back towards me and said, “Princess Luna trusts my judgment. In all these years, I have never faltered. If I thought him a danger, I would have wiped his memory personally. In my opinion, he is sane.”

There was a slight pause as a sly smile appeared on his face, “And…this works out rather nicely…”

Sawbones looked confused, “But…sir, you don’t actually intend to-”

Hex nodded. Sawbones stopped talking and nodded in agreement.

Hex leaned towards me and said, “You asked, ‘Who are the Keepers?’ If you want to know, I will tell you. I’ve pestered you and misdirected you long enough since you awoke today. In the past, I’ve deceived you, misled you, and even called you crazy. It’s time you knew the truth…if you really want to know it.”

Before I could respond he raised his roof and said, “But! Once I finish answering that question, I am going to ask you to join us. You’re destined to do great things. I want to ensure they’re the right things for the right ponies. You’ll do that, with us.”

I had to ask, “Uh…what will happen if I refuse?”

Hex leaned back and said, “Well…first we, as in I, would probably rip out your memories. ALL of your memories. We haven’t figured out a good middle ground yet…so when we have ponies like you, who are…stubborn…about false memories, we either leave them alone to go mad or wipe their memory completely. After that we would pop in a new back story and characterization, relocate you, give you a new identity, and let you loose!”

“Huh…I see…” I mumble.

“Yeah, and we couldn’t be friends anymore,”

“Oh well, in that case that sounds pretty good. Seems like a bonus to not be your friend anymore,” I said, a small smile on my face.

HP punched me in the shoulder for that, “Very funny featherbrain!”

Hex and I started laughing. Despite being strapped to a hospital bed and most likely a prisoner, I was relieved. Hex hadn’t really changed very much. Of course, he hasn’t made any sexual references, so that was different, but that was a good thing.

“Oh! That’s right…” Hex suddenly said, clapping his hooves together, “seeing as you won’t keep that false memory either way, lemme just…get that out…”

Hex stood and moved to a spot right next to my head. “Now…I want you to clear your mind…” he said quietly, “and imagine…a peaceful, beautiful beach…”

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. I haven’t been to a beach, but I’ve seen photos and stuff. So I quickly picture what I think being at as beach would be like. The waves, the sand, the sun…it’s all very relaxing…

“Now imagine…somepony you’re attracted to…in a swimsuit…”

I snapped my eyes open, “NO.”

“Emerald, you have to do it. Trust me; I know what I’m doing.”

“Didn’t you just say you’ve lied and deceived me and a bunch of other not trustworthy things?”

“Yeah, but that was less important stuff!”

“I don’t really think this will work. I can’t trust you. How is this supposed to remove whatever you did to my brain?”

“Emerald, who is Director of the Keepers of the Night here? Hmm?”

“I don’t know, you haven’t actually told me anything!”

“Ok, I’m the Director, I’m trustworthy, now shut up and imagine it or you’re gonna have that memory in your head for the rest of your life!”

I grumbled under my breath.

“Look, the process requires you to be relaxed. Normally, we would knock you out and wait for you to wake up in a couple hours, but I know you want answers ASAP, so just do this, relax and we can move on,” Hex explained.

I rolled my eyes, “You’re sure this is necessary?”

Hex smiled and nodded. I still don’t trust him.

I let out a long sigh and closed my eyes. I imagine the scene again. And…I imagine…something…

“Yoink!” Hex suddenly exclaimed. The image disappeared from my mind.

I also feel dizzy. VERY dizzy. I open my eyes and see the room spinning out of control and shut them again. I clench my teeth to prevent from vomiting.

I hear Hex say brightly, “Hmm…black is classic, but I feel Luna would look better in…perhaps dark red?”

I quickly open my eyes, still dizzy, and focus on the spinning image of Hex holding…WHAT IN THE WORLD?

“Yeah, I ripped the thought clean out of your head,” Hex said as the image rolled itself up and disappeared in his coat pocket, “Isn’t that cool? We use it for interrogations and- Whoa, calm down Emerald!”

If I wasn’t trying to escape earlier, I sure am now. Forget the Keepers, I just want to get free and beat the living snot out of him!

All my thrashing and struggling got me nowhere. Nowhere and tired.

“Emerald, if you don’t calm down, I’m going to shoot you full of morphine and come back in a few hours,” Hex looked over to Sawbones and motioned him over. Sawbones had a stern look on his face and only shook his head. “Ok, I can’t shoot you full of morphine, but I will leave and just let you lay here for a few hours.”

He muttered out of the side of his mouth, “Never lets me do what I want…”

I slowly relax again. But I’m still probably going to kill him when I get free. I hope this glare translates that to him…

Hex stepped back to the spot he was in before messing with my head. “Alright, all you need to do is try to bring up that night. Just focus on you getting wasted and acting like an ass.”

I didn’t close my eyes. I hope this glare can set him on fire.

Hex rolled his eyes, “Emerald, the sooner you cooperate, the sooner we can finally get to the point of this chapter.”

OK, that confused me, “What are you-”

“Don’t worry about it, something a friend taught me about walls. Now just think about that memory.”

I give Hex one last glare and close my eyes. The memory comes back clear and in unreal focus. Before the first part finishes the image disappears again. The dizziness sets in and I almost lose my lunch…or…whatever I have in my stomach.

“There we go,” Hex said brightly.

Once my vision stopped spinning, I opened my eyes to find Hex holding a small strip of movie film. Though I can’t see it in detail, it looks like each frame is moving!

“Will the wonders of science ever cease?” He said as he moved it closer to me, “We call it a false memory. This is just the physical manifestation of it. See, sometimes ponies remember things we may not want them remembering, so we implant a false memory in their heads. Normally, the false memory takes over and seems like the only thing they remember. Whenever they call up that event, the false memory comes to light. Some ponies are stubborn though, and the false memory never really takes hold.”

The film was only a few frames long, but each frame contained one of the events I remember from the false memory. Now with it removed, all I can I remember is the events with the shoggoth and the like. I was more interested in how such magic works than scared…but I was a little scared. The idea that there was a spell that allowed one to replace a pony’s memory was unsettling, to say the least.

The film floated back to Hex. With a tap of his horn, the film burned into flames and turned to ash.

“Now that you’re brain is all better and I have deemed you sane, let’s get you up,” Hex said brightly. He seemed to take this whole situation in his usual manner. With a quick flick of his horn, the bindings on me were released and I was finally able to move.

Easier said than done of course. I was lying comatose in a bed for five days, so I wasn’t exactly able to get up and go galloping. Most I could was sit up and get a little more comfortable. Hex thankfully got a pillow for me and Sawbones left to get something for me to drink.

Hex settled back onto his stool as I finished the water I was brought. “Now that you’re free and relaxed and not trying to kill me, it’s time I finally answer your question,” he said.

He took a deep breath and began, “The Keepers of the Night is an organization dedicated to the protection of Equestria from behind the scenes. I am the Director, technically the second-in-command. The Keepers works to protect Equestria from the various threats that the ordinary public doesn’t or shouldn’t know about.

“We use covert methods to deal with threats in a quick, efficient, and clean manner. Any witnesses are dealt with, and all evidence of our existence is wiped. The only ponies that know what has happened are the Keepers. We seal away dangerous magical artifacts, fight cultists, and defeat the monsters that are unnatural to Equestria and our world.

“To put it simply, the Royal Guard is the visible force of Equestria. They’re the ponies you see stopping criminals and wear shiny armor and stuff. The Keepers have no uniform. We are faceless. We are everywhere. For twelve centuries we have worked in the shadows. Every village in Equestria has at least one of our agents there on surveillance. Larger cities obviously have more. Unicorns, earth ponies, pegasi, griffons, dragons, anyone and everyone can be one of us.”

Hex stopped and asked, “Any questions?”

I was still trying to understand everything I was just told. I didn’t know where to start next. I just went with my gut, “What do you mean ‘monsters unnatural to Equestria?’”

“The Great Old Ones,” Hex answered simply, “They came long before ponies from beyond the stars. They have been and will always be. We wage a constant, never ending struggle with them since Alhazred first wrote the Necronomicon.”

“Wait, what? I thought you made up all that stuff for your books!”

“Ah! An ingenious idea, if I say so myself. You see: I was raised to be in this position. A member of the Lovecraft family has always led the Keepers of the Night. When my father…stepped down…I took over while I was still in school. I decided then to try a new strategy with information control.

Think of it this way: somepony runs up to you in the street and raves about the return of Cthulhu. What do you think? ‘This pony is crazy! It’s just a book!’ See, It’s not that we dress up lies as the truth. We dress truth as fiction.”

I didn’t know what to say. That’s exactly what I would think. The books were known as simply stories. Most ponies thought Hex a twisted writer. No pony thought they were real, except the really weird ones.

“Who was Alhazred?” I asked next, remembering the zebra from my dream.

“Alhazred was a scholar in the Zebra Lands. He traveled around the world, visited several ruins and saw many terrible things. The visions he saw…drove him mad. He wrote a book. A cursed book. Any who dealt with this book were driven mad by what was contained inside. To this day, he is remembered in many villages simply as The Mad Zebra. The book was translated by the first of my family and became known as the Necronomicon.”

“So the Necronomicon exists?”

“Of course. It’s a veritable encyclopedia of the Great Old Ones and their minions. It contains spells, anecdotes, descriptions, and illustrations, everything that Alhazred learned about them.”

I became silent again. I felt like I knew this already. Well, I did. Hex wrote about it in his books, but it’s weird hearing it’s now real. I still had one question to ask.

“How does Luna fit into all this?”

A grin appeared on HP’s face, “Oooooo! Wanna know about your special somepony hm?”

I could feel myself blush. Especially after remembering the junk he pulled on me trying to get that false memory removed.

Hex cleared his throat, “We originally started as an underground organization. About sixty years later Princess Luna took over and we became official. When she disappeared, Princess Celestia led us. With her return, Princess Luna is once again leading the Keepers of the Night. I run it day to day while she comes in for most major decisions. She herself has faced many monsters the two of us can only barely imagine.”

I became silent again. I was trying to take everything in, but even then I felt like I only scratched the surface. The Great Old Ones, The Keepers of the Night, Luna, HP Lovecraft, Alhazred…

“Now…I told you a very brief history of the Keepers of the Night. I have answered several questions, and I feel I have given you a picture of the organization I run. Now comes your decision.

“I want you to join the Keepers of the Night. You’ll be trained in magic, espionage, combat and secrecy. You have a talent for this. The Elder Sign appeared as your cutie mark after I gave you my rough drafts. It’s your special talent, not Arcane Magical Research or whatever story you made up. I was born to lead the Keepers, you were born to fight as one of us.”

Hex straightened up a little, “However…I have to warn you. The missions I’ll send you on may end in your death. You will be fighting monsters that drive ponies insane with a single look, cultists that follow no laws of logic, and face things that should never have been in existence. Death is always possible…but that may be better than the alternative.”

He fidgeted a little. Hex was nervous, slowly picking his words as he spoke, “The…most of the unicorns in the Keepers are dedicated to magic combat, especially with the Elder Sign. It is powerful, one of the few spells that works against the Great Old Ones. But…it comes at a price. Every time you use it, the magic saps your strength. I’m not talking physical or even magic, but your mind. Most ponies working in the field actively fighting…they go insane after a few years. Some barely survive their first year without some level of insanity. First nightmares…then hallucinations…hearing things…and then you’re gone. Very few ponies have survived long in the field, but we need them. I won’t lie; you’re going to be in the field.”

Hex suddenly perked up, “But maybe with your special talent being the Elder Sign, you may be immune to the effects! When you fought that shoggoth, it was running from you! Even I couldn’t defeat it! You not only protected us, you repelled and destroyed it!”

He took a breath and calmed down a bit before continuing, “If you do decide to join, you’ll have to give up your job. No one can know what you do. You can still live with Moorfrost at your apartment, but you will be traveling a lot. Before that of course, is training.”

Hex stopped talking and asked, “I can give you some time to think it over. You want me to come back later?”

I shook my head. I already knew my answer. Hex warned me he would ask, and despite the dangers, I didn’t change my mind.

“I’ll do it. I’ll join you.”

Hex tilted his head, slightly surprised, “You sure? I mean, you may die or go crazy!”

I nodded.

“You’ll have to give up your job and other jobs you may want or have.”

I nodded again.

“There’s a lot of training, and classes, and tests and it’s all very difficult.”

Nod again.

“We get paid pretty well, so that’s good…but don’t think you’ll have a ton of mares throwing themselves at you like there are with me!”

Does the Elder Sign cause narcissism? Perhaps narcissistic delusions?

“It’s a commitment Emerald. Once you join, you can’t leave. I just want to warn you now!”

I groan and say, “I know the dangers, I hate my job, will you just shut up and let me join already?”

I shake my head and say, “Look, I spent a good portion of my time since graduation wishing something incredible would happen. I wanted to be important! But it wasn’t going to happen. Now you offer me an adventure and a chance to make my mark on history, even if only a select few will know about it. Why in the world would I give that up to be some loser desk jockey?”

Hex smiled and said, “Alright then. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

He offered me his hoof. I reached over and shook it.

“Welcome to the Keepers of the Night.”

How to Apologize to Your Dragon

How do I explain this to Moorfrost?

That question had been bothering me all day.

Would I even have to? Did Hex modify her memory along with most of the Gala attendees?

I shuddered whenever I thought of telling her the truth. Or should I say ‘the truth’? Seeing as everypony thinks I was thrown out for offending Princess Luna and public drunkenness, I wasn’t sure if I should tell her what happened or let her believe the story Hex had cooked up.

I’m still very annoyed that Hex decided to cast me as a drunk. He claimed it was a rush job and it was the best possible idea. Makes me wonder what the other ideas were…

Hex shipped me out a day after I woke up. He said I seemed well enough to get up and moving, and I admit I am very glad to get out of the hospital.

However, considering I am now carrying a box on my back filled with my personal effects from my old job, I’m not exactly riding on a high note. Not only was I fired, which was OK considering I was going to quit and I hated that job, I also got slapped with a lawsuit. Yes, my former employer is claiming my indiscretion at the Gala caused her to lose business. Being a lawyer, she’ll try anything to make money off me.

So I got fired, had all my stuff from my desk thrown in a box, and was escorted off the premises by security. Oh, I also got to hear how my identity as the “Drunk Green Unicorn” got leaked through a tabloid and now everypony knows it’s me. My former boss said if I ever landed another job, I may want to go to Las Pegasus and try my hoof at roulette. My sheer dumb luck would make me more money to pay her back with.

Though I do feel…hopeful? I don’t know if that’s the right word.

Now that I’m free of my old job, I can join with the Keepers of the Night and do…whatever it is they do. Not only would I get to do something exciting and cool, I’d be working under Princess Luna and Hex. I know, chances are still pretty bad, but I can’t help but think that the Gala did help get me closer to her. I did save her life. That’s got to count for something!

My little monologue distracted me until I was standing at my front door, when I realized the gravity of my situation. If Moorfrost does know the story as Hex skewed it, she’s going to regard me as a drunk. A drunk who made an ass of himself and nearly got arrested. A drunk who’s been in a coma for a week due to alcohol poisoning. A drunk who just lost his job and has little prospect of finding another.

I took a deep breath. Pray she has mercy on me.

I opened the door slowly, quickly entered, and shut it silently behind me. I poke my head in the kitchen and find it empty. The thought pops into my head that she left, frustrated or disgusted at me for what had happened. It persists as I pass the kitchen and enter the living room, finding it empty as well. Just as the panic was rising, I heard a soft snoring coming from the bedroom.

I push the door open and find Moorfrost snoring away on my bed, despite it being the middle of the afternoon. Not wanting to wake her, I focus and create a dim light at the end of my horn. It gave off just enough light to allow me to see her, as well as the small pile of papers next to her. I quietly picked one up and found a letter from Hex:

Emerald is still in intensive care. For some reason, the guards won’t let anypony near him, not even me! It’s been five days for crying out loud! I know you’re worried about him, but they still won’t let anypony see him. They tell me he’s doing fine, though that’s what they’ve BEEN telling us. I’ll send you a message once the situation changes.

-HP

I guess Hex didn’t bother to tell Moorfrost anything. Other then I was in the hospital of course. The rest of the pile had similar messages, mostly Hex telling Moorfrost I was fine and that she wasn’t allowed to see me. Personally, I’m surprised she didn’t go on a rampage trying to check on me.

I heard a groan and immediately drop the letter I was reading. Moorfrost had rolled over and was rubbing her eyes as she sat up. She looked over at me blearily and muttered, “Emerald…?”

I was suddenly gripped by the urge to run out, fearful of her reaction. Considering she harped on me about everything, I expected her to get angry and lecture me. All I did, however, was smile.

She immediately launched herself at me and hugged me. I got one of my forelegs free and hugged her back. I missed her after all that craziness with Hex and the Keepers.

After a long time, she finally let me go and took a step back. As she wiped her tears away, she said, “Emerald…I…I heard you were taken to the hospital…they wouldn’t let me or Hex see you…”

I had to ask, “Did Hex say why I was there?”

She shook her head, “No! I read in the paper about the accidents, and all the weird stuff that happened, and I…I…” She started sniffling again as she finished.

“I’m alright, don’t cry! Nothing broken or misplaced, I just…” I stopped. What do I say?

Before I had to continue, Moorfrost’s stomach let out a loud rumbling growl.

“Let’s go get something to eat,” I said with a small smile.

“When you didn’t return after the Gala, I was worried. But I thought you were with Hex and safe! I didn’t find out you were in the hospital until Hex contacted me early the next morning,” Moorfrost explained as we left my apartment building. She was riding on my back as we headed to a nearby diner for salads. “When I got to the hospital, Hex was there and said that you got sick and that the guards weren’t letting anypony enter.”

“Ah, sorry about that. I really didn’t want to have you worry,” I replied nervously. I’m still not sure what I should tell her. It sounds like Hex didn’t tell her much, and the only other source of information she had was the news.

“Of course I would worry! Why in Equestria wouldn’t I? Between you being gone and that weird news article, I didn’t know what was going on!”

“Weird news article?”

“The day after the Gala, there was a really long article in the paper about a bunch of accidents that happened. There was flying cake, rampaging animals, carriage crashes; I didn’t know what to make of it.”

“Oh yeah, I saw that…”

“By the way…” she said as she poked the back of my head, “What actually happened to you?”

“I got sick and was taken to the hospital.”

I let out a small whimper as pain shot through my ear. Moorfrost had pinched it with her claws and gave it a small yank as she asked, “You and I both know you don’t like the taste of hard cider. So what actually happened?”

I couldn’t help but hesitate as I was reminded of the interrogation Sawbones had given me. All I could say was, “Well, I was pretty nervous. Maybe I figured that drinking might relax me and…stuff.”

The pain intensified. She wrenched my ear and twisted it. I immediately stopped walking and sat down off to the side of the road.

“Listen Emerald, you raised me since I was hatched, and I’ve picked up on all your little quirks and nervous tics. I know you’re lying.”

Would it have been better if she thought I was a drunk, or the situation now? Why didn’t Hex just tell her? Or at the very least, did that memory replacement thing?

“Ah! How nice to see you two!”

I hadn’t noticed Hex standing a few feet ahead of us, the usual grin on his face. Normally, I would attribute this to chance, but I couldn’t shake a subtle paranoia that he was keeping an eye on me.

“Hey Hex. What are you doing here?” Moorfrost asked brightly. She still had her claw fastened tightly to my ear.

Hex walked closer and replied, “I figured I would head down to see how Emerald’s doing. If he was well enough, I wanted to grab dinner and celebrate his release from the hospital.” He noticed Moorfrost had my ear pinched tightly and added, “What are you two doing?”

“Emerald’s lying to me about what happened at the Gala. I don’t believe for a second he got sick from drinking too much,” Moorfrost said, twisting my ear slightly. I let out a small whimper of pain.

“Really? Did you read that article in the newspaper?” Hex asked, tilting his head slightly. The smile had disappeared. Hex now looked…curious.

Moorfrost rolled her eyes, “Listen, I was with Emerald right up till he left. He was nervous, scared out of his mind, but he wasn’t drinking. Also, when we talked you made it sound like some exotic disease or illness that made him sick.”

Hex nodded in agreement. As much as I wanted Moorfrost to leave me alone about the Gala, I was more concerned that Hex would scramble her brain or something.

He suddenly perked up and said, “Well, seeing as Emerald’s out and about, why don’t we go grab something eat? My treat!”

I rubbed my ear dully as we sat down at the restaurant Hex picked. For some reason, he insisted on a fancy upscale restaurant with private rooms for everypony willing to pay for them. He brushed aside any protest from Moorfrost and I for a more modest place out of courtesy, saying that he wanted to celebrate. It was odd coming from him, as he hated upscale restaurants and treating me to a free meal. He also avoided most of Moorfrost’s questions on the way over, instead talking about the weather, the economy, the new book he’s working on, and other topics focused around him.

As we sat down, I expected the restaurant to be a trap, meant to capture Moorfrost and adjust her memories so she believed the fake story he cooked up about the Gala.

Moorfrost and I sat opposite from Hex at a fine wooden table in the private room Hex asked for. The room wasn’t too large, but it was spacious enough to be comfortable but not too big to seem empty. It did feel odd to be sitting on fine cushions rather than the usual hard seats I was used to, but I shrugged it off.

“Isn’t this place nice?” Hex asked, a smug smile on his face, “Pretty upscale eh? The food here is pricy, and the portions pretty small, but it is worth it!”

I rolled my eyes and chuckled. I found his bragging quite welcome. At least Moorfrost wasn’t asking about the Gala anymore.

“What happened at the Gala?” Moorfrost asked.

She’s persistent.

“What kind of gems do you like?” Hex asked, ignoring her question entirely.

A small black plate landed gently in front of Moorfrost with a quiet clatter. The simple plate had several different types of gems on it, glittering softly in the light. Moorfrost and I both gasped loudly. She immediately grabbed a topaz and gave it a long, sloppy lick like it was an ice cream cone. I quickly yanked it out of her claws and dropped it back onto the plate.

“Emerald!” Moorsfrost whined.

“Something wrong?” Hex asked.

“She’s not actually supposed to eat them, is she?” I replied.

Moorfrost went to grab the plate, but I grabbed it and held it above her head.

Hex smiled and said, “As I said, this place serves very pricy, but delicious food.”

Moorfrost didn’t appreciate me stealing her meal. She scratched my leg with her claws, breaking my concentration, and allowing her to catch the plate before it fell. I cursed under my breath as she started crunching loudly on an aquamarine.

As I rubbed my newest wound, I heard somepony ask, “Would you like me to bandage that for you?”

I jumped, knocking my glass of water over. Before it could tip, a hoof shot past me and caught it. The voice belonged to the waitress standing behind me…whom I didn’t even realize was in the room. When I turned to thank her, I noticed she was a zebra. Though a waitress, she didn’t seem friendly or approachable. Her brass-yellow eyes didn’t seem happy and warm, but cold. I found myself wondering this as she quickly wrapped my foreleg with surprising speed and efficiency. Did this sort of thing happen often at this restaurant?

A waiter entered to take our orders as she finished.

Moorfrost had barely finished licking the plate clean when she said, “Can I get some more topaz and rubies?”

The waiter looked at Hex. He nodded slightly in response, and the waiter wrote down her order. Noticing me watching, Hex winked with a small grin on his face.

I ordered a simple salad, and Hex ordered himself a gourmet Panini.

The waiter bowed and left.

Moorfrost leaned back with a dreamy expression, “I can’t wait for the gems to come. I haven’t had any in months.”

“Sorry Moorfrost, gemstones are kinda expensive to have for three meals a day,” I remarked, a slight tone of guilt in my voice.

She waved a claw in my direction, “Don’t worry about it, you’re trying your best at work and…”

She paused for a moment and became silent. After a few seconds, she snapped her head towards me and demanded, “What are you not telling me about the Gala? Explain right now what happened.”

The force with which she asked stunned me. I instinctively leaned back and threw my hooves in front of my face, scared I would spend another week asleep in a block of ice.

Instead she focused on Hex across the table and asked, “What happened at the Gala? You haven’t answered a single question and it’s starting to make me mad.”

Hex crossed his hooves and said, “Why don’t you ask Emerald?”

I looked at him for some sort of answer. Do I tell her the story he had fabricated? Should I tell her what actually happened?

She focused on me again. Despite being larger, I cowered back as green sparks popped from the corners of her mouth.

I took a deep breath and said, “I guess it won’t make any difference. I’ll tell you the truth.”

She backed off, allowing me to straighten up and explain, “You know how I was nervous about the Gala? How I was afraid something terrible would happen? Well something terrible did.” I told her everything: Princess Celestia’s warning, the mare that blew herself up, meeting Luna, Stonehoof…and the shoggoth. I told her how Hex, Luna and I were trapped and soon to be dead and I fought it back and destroyed it. Every time she tried to interrupt, I talked over her to silence her. When the story reached me waking up, I left out my dreams and the false memories Hex had stuck in my head.

“…and then I got fired. Diction’s going to sue me for what happened since she thinks I was drunk at the Gala and hurt her firm. After that, I went home and found you,” I finished with my story and emptied my glass of water in one gulp.

No one spoke. I kept looking at Hex, fearing I had committed some mistake telling Moorfrost what had actually happened. He had the same smile on his face through the whole story. Moorfrost was quiet, trying to understand everything I had said.

After a few minutes, all Moorfrost had to say was, “So what you’re saying…is that the letter you got weeks ago was a signal to some cultist, that you got by accident, to try and assassinate the princesses at the Grand Galloping Gala with a shoggoth. And you used some deus ex machina magic to not only save them, but destroy the supposedly unkillable monster. A monster that didn’t exist until Hex made it up for his books.”

I nodded and added, “It is quite the odd story.”

“And it’s a LIE!” Moorfrost shouted.

She took a deep breath. Before she could exhale and freeze me solid, Hex clapped his hooves together. The zebra waitress immediately grabbed Moorfrost and forced her mouth closed. Moorfrost struggled to get free, but the zebra wasn’t allowing her to escape. Heavy metal bands shot out of my seat and wrapped me tightly to the chair.Moorfrost got free long enough to release a single green fireball, but it missed her captor entirely and instead engulfed one of the candles on the table. The flames snuffed it and turned it an icy blue color. The metal bands now restrained her to her chair as well, with an extra one to cover her mouth.

Hex laughed as he rose from his seat, “Nicely done Pyrite. Not the first time you’ve had to deal with a dragon, eh?”

“No sir,” The zebra responded, her voice cold and businesslike. She shook the ice crystals off her hoof and took a step back behind Moorfrost and me, “First time I have ever dealt with an Ice Drake though.”

Hex looked at Moorfrost, and then at me and said, “I told you the project was full-proof. No pony will ever believe that story. It’s just too crazy to be real!”

“Look, I didn’t feel right trying to lie to her so I--”I said, but Hex cut me off.

He shook his head and said, “Stop. I have to say, for trying to join a ‘secret’ organization, you really suck at keeping it secret.”

Moorfrost was glaring at him through the metal bands that tied her to the chair.

“Hey, don’t blame me. Emerald told you the whole truth! Well, almost all of it. He left out the part about me and my little organization from the story.”

Moorfrost’s eyes shifted over to me.

“He was telling the truth. While I admit I didn’t tell him to tell you, I sort of implied no pony would believe him and he shouldn’t bother trying. But he did anyway!”

The doors opened and a waiter wheeled in a small cart with our food on it, “Dinner is served.” He paused when he noticed Moorfrost and I strapped to our chairs and asked, “Will you two not be eating?”

Hex chuckled, took his seat and said, “They will, if they promise to be nice and not try to freeze me.”

The waiter quickly placed our plates down onto the table. Moorfrost’s plate was glittering so brightly from the gems that my eyes started to hurt from looking at it. My salad looked very tasty, same with HP’s Panini. When he finished, the waiter bowed and left, shutting the doors behind him.

Hex picked up a slice of his Panini and took a bite, chewing very slowly to savor the taste. He swallowed and said, “It’s a real shame you two are so tied up at the moment. Your food would probably taste delicious!” He took a sip from his water glass and tapped his hoof on the table. The bands constraining Moorfrost and I retracted.

I expected Moorfrost to immediately attack Hex, but I was surprised when she hesitated. She took a deep breath, prompting the zebra named Pyrite to shift slightly, but she didn’t attack. I was confused why until I noticed her eyes darting between the plate and Hex’s smug grin. The inner conflict between her dragon instincts and her desire to punish Hex ended when she snatched up a few gems and began eating.

“Don’t take this as I forgive you! Either of you!” She yelled between mouthfuls of topaz.

With Moorfrost subdued, I took a few bites of my salad. I was hungry, and it was delicious, but I was worried about what would happen to us. Hex made me think I had broken the rules of the Keepers by telling Moofrost about the shoggoth. And what was up with this…Pyrite? The restaurant too! Why did the waiter seem unfazed when he entered and found us bound to our seats?

Hex noticed my slow pace. He quickly finished his meal and said, “Emerald, when you finish your salad, I’d like to take you and Moorfrost on a tour.”

“Tour?” I asked nervously. Was that code for ‘I’m going to rip out all of your memories’?!

He nodded, “Yes. As a Keeper-in-training, you need to be shown the HQ and go through a small orientation. Once that’s done, you can begin the rigorous training procedure.”

I looked at Moorforst out of the corner of my eye. She seemed to be pretty engrossed in her meal. I asked, “What about Moorfrost?”

Hex scratched his chin and said, “She seems trustworthy enough. I’m sure we can at least let her know what you’ll be doing.” He added, “Also, the memory adjustment spells don’t work on dragons. Better just let her in on the secret or she’ll freeze us solid!”

Author's Note

It has been far too long. I apologize for the huge gap between chapters, I had a lot of stress going on and couldn't focus on writing. Once everything clams down with me and I get settled into a new place and a new job, I should be able to get more chapters out quicker.

The next chapter is largely written, and was to be released at the same times as this one, but the word count probably would have hit 10000 words, if not way more. I had to break it up. Who wants to read that much in one chapter? No one.

Big thanks to Aslfrasle for editing and help. If you haven't read any of his works, please do so. He writes stories that are much more interesting.

If you'd like to help edit and critique, feel free to send me a message or leave a comment about what horrible mistakes I've made while writing. If you don't want to help, leave me a message or comment anyway saying I'm an awesome author and other nice things that will boost my confidence. I might get these chapters out sooner!

Hell Frozen Rain

“Hush now quiet now….”

It was raining. Every drop felt like ice on my coat.

“It's time to lay your sleepy head…”

“Has he said anything else?” A female voice said.

“No, he keeps repeating that lullaby over and over. He hasn’t said anything else since we found him in the woods.” A male voice replied.

I couldn’t stop shivering. I couldn’t get warm. I was rubbing my shoulders and forelegs constantly trying to warm them. I just couldn’t do it.

The rain stopped over me. I paused and looked up. She was looking at me with such sadness and pity.

I looked down immediately. The face reminded me of my mother’s.

I couldn’t bear to think of her.

“Hush now quiet now…”

“Don’t worry, he can stay here until we find his family. I’m sure they’re worried sick about him.”

I heard a pony trot away, hooves splashing in the puddles along the street.

I couldn’t stop shivering, even with the umbrella now blocking the rain.

“Hey there, what’s your name?”

I stopped for a moment.

I shook my head and muttered, “Here is a candle…to light you to bed…here comes a chopper…to chop off your head…”

“Are you feeling better?”

I just finished eating. Soup was never a favorite, but I was too cold and hungry to care.

I looked at her and nodded. She had brought me dinner in bed and didn’t leave. She kept looking at me so sadly.

“What’s your name?” She asked again.

I stared at the bowl in front of me. I have to give her my name.

“Emerald…Shine.” I muttered.

She smiled and said, “That’s a very nice name.”

She paused before asking, “Do you…know where your parents are?”

I kept staring at my bowl. I didn’t want to lie.

She sighed, “It’s alright Emerald. You’ll be safe here.”

I hated rain. Nothing good happens when it rains. It had to be raining today.

“So what is the actual test?” One of the colts next to me asked his friend.

The second colt quickly scanned the hallway. It was only the four of us. I was staring out the window, and the filly on my left was buried in a book.

He said in a hushed voice, “My brother said it was to hatch a dragon.”

My eye twitched slightly. Could somepony our age to do that? Should I be able to do that?

“Seriously? How do they expect a colt to do that?” The first colt asked.

“I don’t think they actually expect you to hatch it. It’s more about how you try to hatch it. I heard there have been a few ponies that could hatch them.”

The door opened and a voice called, “Next!”

I got up and trotted through the door.

I just entered the ground floor of a lecture hall. Along the furthest row in the back were the judges. Each wore a stern look and a clipboard floating in front of them.

The dragon egg was sitting on a wagon in front of me. Time to see if I’m cut out for Celestia’s school.

I closed my eyes and imagined the desired result.

I want that egg to hatch.

Hatch.

Seriously. Hatch.

Now.

I opened my eyes. Nothing happened.

I quickly looked over at the judges. They did not seem impressed.

I closed my eyes and tried again. I wanted this to work so badly.

I could hear the cracking. Even before I opened my eyes again I knew it worked. I have no clue how, but it was the desired result.

Sitting in the remains of its shell was a small ice blue dragon. As I looked at it, it began suck on one of it’s claws.

It’s actually really cute. I smile a little looking at the small dragon.

Huh.

It stopped raining outside.

Another day of boring classes.

I yawned as the teacher continues to explain different magical theories I have no drive to actually understand. Earth energies this, Lifestream that, balance between Order and Chaos, blah blah blah.

“For the next assignment,” the teacher said, turning to look at his class, “I’d like each of you to pair up and work together.”

Immediately, friends began grabbing each other to ensure they would be paired up. In the chaos, everypony quickly moved their desks together to be with their friends.

I hadn’t moved. Nor did anypony come over to work with me.

It always happened that way.

The teacher came over and said, “Still no partner, Emerald?”

A small mocking grin appeared on my face, “Sorry, sir. It seems I’ll be alone again, as always.”

“Don’t worry about that. We have a new student today, and I’ll be he would like to be your partner,” my teacher replied with smile on his face.

Darn it.

A desk dropped down next to me with a loud clatter. The new kid had brought his desk over and was smiling at me.

“What’s your name?” He said, still smiling like a mad pony.

I stared for a moment at him. The gray colt was nearly bouncing in his chair he was so excited to be here.

“Emerald Shine. And you are…?” I replied.

“Call me HP,” he said.

“What does that stand for?”

His smile turned into a grin, “To the mares, it stands for…High Performance.”

“To…just mares? Is that a pick-up line?”

He ran his hoof through his mane and said, “To you, it’s Hex Pen Lovecraft.”

“Hex? That’s a weird name.”

“It’s a tradition of sorts in my family. My dad’s name is Hay Paper.”

I chuckled slightly. Hex didn’t seem like such a bad pony.

I awoke with a start.

I was home, in my living room. I guess I fell asleep in my chair.

Now would be a really bad time to find out the Gala had turned out to be some long winded delusion or something like that.

I let out a long sigh as I rubbed my head. “Really need to stop sleeping in this chair,” I muttered, “Gives me the weirdest dreams…”

“What were you dreaming about?”

“I was dreaming about…” I began.

I jumped out of my chair and turned to face my guest.

Where is the other half of my living room? A few steps ahead of me, the carpet and walls abruptly ended and became cobblestone. Half my apartment had been replaced with a simple cobblestone room with a chair and my guest.

A zebra? I’ve never met a zebra before. They were rare in Equestria, but I have seen a few around Canterlot. He was sitting in the cobblestone half of the room, leaning back with his hooves crossed in front of him. Though I've seen many zebras, almost all of them have black and white stripes in their coats and manes. My guest’s coat did have the stripes, but his mane was a ghostly white.

Why is a zebra sitting in…what’s left of my living room?

“Hello Emerald,” he greeted me with a warm smile.

He knows my name. Wonderful. “You know my name?”

He nodded, “Of course I do.”

“And you are…?”

“Ah!” He exclaimed with a laugh, “I forgot, it is rude to invite yourself into a house without introducing yourself first!”

“Yeah, it kinda is,” I muttered sarcastically.

“Allow me to introduce myself,” he said, standing from his chair and bowing, “My name, is Alhazred.”

I tilted my head slightly.

“I’m insane. This is crazy. I have gone mad!” I said, rising to a shout, “WHAT IS GOING ON?” I dropped back into my chair and began rubbing my head.

Alhazred shook his head with a sigh and said as he sat back down, “You are not insane. At least not yet.”

He leaned forward and stared at me, “Do you recognize my voice?”

I stared back. This can't be happening. I replied, “You were the voice. The one I heard when the shoggoth almost killed us.”

He smiled, “Yes, I revealed to you your power. If not for me…well, it is not a pretty thought.”

“This is a joke isn’t it?” I said desperately, “This is all a joke. Hex probably hit me with some…hallucination…spell thing as a prank! The Gala, the shoggoth, you, it’s all him bucking with me again! Alhazred? Do you seriously expect me to believe that?”

“Hex Pen Lovecraft would not use a shoggoth as part of a prank. He and the Keepers have worked too hard to keep the spawn of the stars at bay,” Alhazred replied, a touch of annoyance in his voice.

It shut me up immediately.

Alhazred looked to his left and said, “We don’t have very much time, so I will be brief.” I followed his gaze to the large door on my right. I don’t remember that door existing…not that it surprises me anymore.

He leaned back and began, “You have heard that name before, correct? Hex Pen Lovecraft and the Keepers of the Night have ensured the safety of Equestria for over a thousand years. From behind dark shadows and closed doors, they work to destroy the spawn of the stars, and the Great Old Ones who threaten your world.”

He paused, took a deep breath, and continued, “You were not imagining the meeting with that mare and her committing suicide. You were not hallucinating a monster when the shoggoth appeared. You didn’t hallucinate any of it because of intoxication, and you were not removed from the Gala early. When confronted, you rose up and struck down a monster with the power of the Elder Sign.”

I instinctively dropped my gaze to my cutie mark.

“A cutie mark represents your special talent, what you were born to do, something you can do without any effort. Some would call that destiny,” the zebra said with a small smile, “When the time came you wielded that power without effort. You were able to protect your friends, and you were able to destroy the shoggoth.”

“I…” I muttered, “Something was…”

“Your father would be proud. Of your skill, at least. But the purpose? He would be angry. Wouldn’t he?” Alhazred asked.

My eyes widened in shock. I started tapping my hoof on the arm of my chair nervously, “I…never really knew my father…”

I looked up at Alhazred. He seemed disappointed.

“I’m sorry to hear that,” he said simply. He looked over at the door again and added, “I had hope things would be different this time.”

“What do you mean?”

Before he answered, the door began to rattle. Somepony was trying to open it, from the sound of the handle being wrenched every which way.

Alhazred clapped his hooves together and said cheerfully, “Our time is up, the real world has come to collect you!” He waved and asked, “You will not mind me coming by tomorrow night, correct?”

“Do I have a choice?” I replied with a small grin.

Alhazred smiled back, “Of course. You can deny yourself the truth. But such things cannot be ignored forever.”

I sighed and dropped my gaze to the floor. I didn't know what he meant. But the more I thought about it, I did.

When I looked back up, the zebra had disappeared.

I got off the chair and trotted to the door. The handle glowed with my magic, and the door swung open.

A bright light blinded me. I instinctively raised my hoof to cover my eyes, but I couldn’t. The soft hum of a machine and gentle beeping filled the air. The smell of disinfectant filled my nose. My eyes adjusted slowly to the terrible light, allowing me a chance to finally figure out where I was.

A hospital. I was lying in a hospital bed, hooked up to several machines with various lines and images on them.

Before I considered anything more, I grumbled, “I really hope I’m actually awake this time.”