Hatred. Pure, bleeding hatred seeped from the magician’s emotional wounds. Her head hung low as she dragged her hooves across the rough path in a daze that only shattered dreams can bring. Cold, broken and alone, the pony meandered across a desolate wasteland of her own exile and creation, mentally condemning that purple unicorn who had punched a pony sized hole in her world, the night only backhoofing her with her own loneliness as she stared at the slowly moving ground.
Stumbling in blind and empty rage, the unicorn cursed as her hooves slowly lost traction in her trance of anger, her mentally weakened form flailing and falling to the dirt as she continued to curse the wretched mare. Never before had the weary pony felt such comfort in the feeling of gravel against her fur, her motivation to stand up and continue aimlessly winding down the path fading quickly. She watched as a cloud of dust rolls over her, irritating her purple eyes shut as she slowly began to give up any hope of salvation.
Anger, rage and fear collided in her mental battlefield, the physical world melting away in her blurry fog. The blue mare’s thoughts continued to spin, the name of one mare embedded in her consciousness:
Twilight Sparkle.
The horrifying image of that pony haunted the magician as she reflected upon her trip to Ponyville’s pathetic outcome; she was shamed and humiliated, and it was all because of the atrocities of that unicorn. She had the town right at her hoof-tips, only for her crowd of beautiful spectators to be wrongfully stolen from her. The thought of the sound of their cheers fading away made her cringe in the dirt.
A painful, claustrophobic darkness continued to surround her, a persistent feeling of empty suffocation falling upon her as her walls continued to close in, leading her eyes to jolt open and forelimbs to flail about. In her attempt to break out of her glass prison, her eyes caught something; in the distance floated a faint, yet drawing light on what could be the horizon; one that may hold promises of shelter from the cold and wind.
Haphazardly, the wizard put her hooves to the ground and forced herself up, overcoming her wounded mindset just enough to allow her to move. Each hoofstep was agonizingly hopeful, both her fears and wants coming together for a match of tug-of-war, her legs taking the strain as she pressed on, consumed in emotional trauma.
As the intensity of the bright light increased, shapes and forms began to materialize in her vision. She watched as the form of a building, an inn and tavern, was sewn together, her hooves picking up the pace, hoping that the structure could offer her shelter. The restraining weights that previously sat upon her mind were shed, hope gleaming in her eyes.
The pony put on a facade of her usual cockiness as she entered the building, holding her chest and head high to make sure the ponies inside knew that, above all, she was better than them. She trotted over to the counter to find a gruff barcolt, if he was even deserving of the title.
“The Great and Powerful Trixie desires a room.”
After a quick look over of the blue mare, the colt behind the bar found himself having a hard time to suppress a laugh.
“Hate t’ break this to’ ya’ filly, but ya’ don’t look so great an’ powerful.”
Isolated snickers were heard throughout the room, most ponies too focused on their card games or hoof wrestles to notice or even care about the silver haired unicorn that trotted in. Trixie found herself stammering much more than she would like before quickly snapping back to her upright pose.
“I’ll have you know that I am the most powerful unicorn in all of Equestria!”
The rough pony chuckles once more. “Yeah? You th’ clown for th’ birthday party?”
More quietly chuckling voices pick up, a room full mares and stallions turning their attention to the bar and the flustered magician.
“The Great and Powerful Trixie demands a bed for the night!”
“You’re great an’ powerful an’ Luna’s my sister. Just last week we ‘ad a poor bloke claimin’ t’ tussle wit’ a manticore. Guy was a riot.”
The colt’s harsh consonants crackled against the unicorn’s ears as nods, murmurs and some isolated laughter showed through the room, the ponies agreeing with the barcolt’s words.
“I’ll show you Great and Powerful...” the wizard muttered under her breath, her horn slowly beginning to take on a familiar blue aura.
The bright light, drawing attention from all ends of the room, crescendos into an intense dark glow, ponies dropping their ale to gaze upon the spectacle. Some ponies elect to tip the tables to use as cover, should the insane unicorn unleash that charged spell upon the poor bar colt.
“Hey now, I was jus’ teasin’, honest. Don- Don’t do anything crazy,” was all he could stammer out, staring down the barrel of a loaded horn.
Trixie almost smiled as the room went near dead-silent, the only noise being that of her pulsating horn. She took in a deep breath, pulling the trigger of her magic.
Nothing.
A fizzle, a spark plopped out of her magical weapon, silence overcoming the room before roaring laughter forced the stillness away, ponies rolling on the floor at the folly of the unicorn.
The target himself began to wipe tears from his eyes. “Know what? I was wrong! You’re the one who’s a riot!”
A deep shade of crimson flashed across the unicorns face as she spun in fear, observing the faces of her bullies. She looked upon them in terror, the failed magician’s own vision becoming blurred with salty pain as another frantic pirouette allowed her to find the door.
Their laughter continued to ring in her head as she sprinted out into the darkness, her tear ducts spilling out to the ground. With a silent plea for help the pony fell to her knees, a crackle of thunder jolting her back to her hooves. Shelter suddenly became a priority again.
Trixie’s eyes found themselves locking onto a small canopy on the outside of the inn. Her stomach twisted in knots at the thought of more humiliation, but she found her options to be painfully limited. Hateful and disgusted, she trotted over to it, laying herself on the hard ground as she cursed the very dirt that she sprawled herself out upon as the clinking of rain resonated in her ears.
“Trixie is Great and Powerful... She’ll show them. She’ll show them all.”
Looking upon her own face in a nearby puddle, the distraught unicorn examined her features, painfully taking note of the dirt and mess that covered her face. With a growling stomach she threw herself upon her back, groaning in agony.
“I am Great and Powerful.”
***
She was surrounded; laughing faces were all around her. Her eyes drifted from pony to pony, watching as they ridiculed her. Ponies of all colors and types clouded her vision, their harsh teasing forcing her to an impossible floor as she curled up, trying to shield herself just to find their faces swirling around her no matter where she looked.
“No redemption for evil ponies.”
The blue mare looked up to see that purple unicorn scowling at her, the pony’s vision slicing right through her being. With tears in her eyes, Trixie reached out, wanting the lavender mare to take her away from the awful place she was in. In horror, she watched as the unicorn turned her flank and began to trot away, the magician lunging for her only to fall short.
“No! Don’t go! Don’t leave me here!”
As the mare left her sight, the wizard’s bullies returned, their laughter drowning out all of her senses.
***
“No!”
Blinding light flooded her vision, her hoof shielding her eyes as her body jolted up with that emotional scream. Breath heavy, she allowed her body to fall back to the dirt, her eyes tightly closing in an anxious sadness.
“I’m not evil...”
The thought of the unicorn condemning her as such wounded her, even as her mind dismissed the event as what it was. The sudden urge to chase after the mare overcame her, only for the pony to slowly grasp her situation: she was still lying under a canopy attached to a tavern outside of Ponyville city limits.
Slowly, Trixie forced herself to her hooves, wobbling on them as she stood, her own heaviness becoming apparent as her breath returned to normal. The blue mare looked outwards, taking note of the path and soaked ground as she wallowed in her sorrow, internally struggling to make peace with the lavender mare while she debated running back to Ponyville.
She nearly facehoofed as a realization dawned on her: she had no reason to return to that town that shunned her. The image of Twilight Sparkle slowly began to turn itself into one of loathing as she began to fume, her veiled resentment for the pony becoming clear to her while her memories of her exile returned.
Soon her vision was that of the moist dirt path below her as her hooves kept pace upon it. A new motivation had swept over her, energizing her limbs as she strove towards another goal. On the horizon lay the large silhouette of the skyline of what could be her salvation:
Manehattan
The performer smiled at the sight of the city, her inner excitement slowly rising.
“I’ll show her redemption.”
In a flash of smoke, a pony in a tattered robe hopped onto the stage, sparks and light emitting from her form. With a trill of her tongue, she announced herself to the milling crowd, most of whom continued to eat their meals or talk amongst themselves at the bar. A few small families seated themselves around the establishment, away from the bar, their children watching with wrapped attention.
The magician lifted her hooves as a swirling sparkle emitted from her horn. She forced a smile as she addressed her crowd, or rather, the crowd that happened to be present.
“Ladies and Gentlecolts! Prepare to be amazed at the powerful magic of the Great and Powerful Trixie!”
As she spoke streamers materialized and flew from space behind her, drawing the attention of some ponies, only for them to return to their cider or meals. With a flash of smoke, the streamers transformed into a sparkling dust, which floated back down to the stage.
Trixie excitedly looked out into the restaurant, only to be met with blank stares and a couple of coughs. Concealing her frown, she continued:
“Watch in awe as Trixie defeats an Ursa Major!”
It was painful for her to resurrect that story, knowing how she was foiled back in Ponyville, but it was the best trick she knew.
Enveloped by her magic, the dust lifted up, glowing blue and forming into the shape of an Ursa Major, or Minor, as it turns out to be. Making the form dance with her magic, Trixie created the illusion of life in front of her, drawing more stray glances from the crowd.
With a silent roar, the Ursa lunged at the magician, the pony taking a practiced sidestep. Glow emitted from her horn she fired bolts of magic at the beast, it recoiling from the blows while magic sparkles flew into the air. More ponies turned to see the spectacle of light and illusion as the battle raged, the pony in ripped clothes attempting to subdue the monster in front of her.
A hidden smile formed upon the blue mare’s face as she caught a glimpse of the crowd who was finally paying attention to her. Her redemption finally seemed to arrive.
She shook the lapse in focus too late, her hoof landing upon her cheap cloak as she stumbled over, falling to her back. The magic dust fell to the floor, dispersing across the stage as she lay in fear: fear of more torment.
Like a crashing boulder, laughter rippled through the crowd, every pony in the room taking a break from their salad or ale to look at the failure of the pony in front of them.
“I didn’t know this was a comedy!”
“Looks like the Ursa slayed her!”
“You couldn’t pay me enough bits to watch that again.”
Hearing the harsh words of her onlookers, Trixie rolled over, facing away from the rest of the restaurant. Her memories were thrown back to those of the tavern, that week or so ago. She was reminded of all the pain she felt; all the humiliation she faced on that awful night.
Not wanting to repeat that time, she stood herself up and carried her head high, partially so that the ponies in the room wouldn’t see her tears. In a flash of smoke the streamers and dust disappeared behind her as she stepped off the stage, heading towards the door. The magician didn’t even bother going to the restaurant owner to collect her pay; she knew she wasn’t coming back.
As the door shut behind her, she immediately felt the chilling wind. The distraught mare tightened her rough robes around her body, hoping to find some sort of safety from the cold. She looked out upon the vast streets of Manehattan, a true emptiness filling her as she realized how alone she really was in the heavily populated city. But worse, alone with nowhere to go.
The magician had hoped to make some sort of pay that night, at least enough to get her a room, but sadly, fate seemed to have other plans. It was in the thriving city that she barely scraped by, struggling on street corners to make enough bits to even purchase her clothes, however horrible they were. It was only by luck that she managed to land the show at the restaurant and bar, and she completely blew it.
Her torrent of self deprecation was interrupted by a young voice.
“Great and Powerful Trixie?”
The mare turned, not knowing what to expect, to see a young colt; one who had been in the restaurant. Trixie gave the pony a blank stare, not wishing to be ridiculed any more this day.
“What?”
“I really liked the show, and I wanted to give you this. You’re awesome!” the young pony stated and exclaimed in a little, yet confident voice as he pulled out and offered a bit in his mouth.
Trixie allowed herself to smile, enveloping and accepting the bit with her magic.
“Thank you, young colt.”
“When I grow up, I want to be a magician just like you!”
Surprised, the blue mare found her allowed and almost forced smile turning into a wide and happy one.
“Well, I’m sure you could be a great magician one day,” she told him, kneeling down to pat him on the head.
The colt turned his head to see his parents beckoning him. He slowly started walking towards them, a spring in his step.
“Goodbye miss! I can’t wait to see more of your shows!”
Trixie smiled at the colt as she watched him happily trot away, retaining that smile as she played with the bit in her hooves.
“Me too.”
She winced as she thought of the alley she would be sleeping in that night.
“Me too.”
***
“Trixie! Trixie, help me!”
The cry for help brushed against the magician’s ears, herself instantly recognizing the voice of Twilight Sparkle.
“Twilight? Where are you?”
The blue mare immediately began frantically searching for the pony from which the call of distress had come from, her eyes being met with the sight of Twilight in the clutches of the Ursa Minor.
In desperation, she charged at the cosmic beast for it to only disappear as she reached it, Celestia’s student falling to the floor. She screamed out the pony’s name as she hurried over to her limp body.
With raspy breathing Twilight turned to Trixie, a scowl on her face. “Some great and powerful unicorn you are.”
The wizard’s eyes widened as she watched the pony slip away from her, fading into darkness.
“No! Twilight, don’t go!”
She looked at the emptiness she held in her forelimbs, quickly realizing how hopeless she was.
“I’ll make this up to you. I’ll fix this, I promise.”
***
A sense of reality slowly returned, the heaviness of the dirty air and the rough feeling of her makeshift bedding immediately becoming apparent to the pony who slept there. Slowly, she pulled herself up from the floor, her mind weighed down by the imaginings her subconscious forced upon her sleeping brain.
The tired magician looked out into the street; she was worried, but ready.
She had some auditions that needed to be tended to.
Excited cheering echoed through the amphitheater, a blue mare’s ears twitching at the sound of their encouraging shouts. She looked over herself as she stood behind the curtain, examining the new, star-laden fabric that hugged her body while she adjusted the new hat that seated itself upon her head. Her horn almost glowed with anticipation as she drew one more deep breath.
Mist filled the stage as the curtains opened, the crowd quieting down only to loudly cheer their hearts out when a fiery spark and a flash of smoke revealed The Great and Powerful Trixie. Fanfare-styled horns sounded as she basked in their adoration, her eyes happily scanning all the smiling faces as a grin of her own streaked across her muzzle.
With a lift of her forehooves, confetti cannons shot out from behind her, the crowd cheering at the simple display. In another flash of light, the magician disappeared in a flash of glitter and shine, only to reappear moments later on the other side of the stage, lifting her hooves as the crowed cheered once more.
“Watch in awe, young ponies, as I, The Great and Powerful Trixie, vanquishes the Ursa Major!” The pain of this trick had long melted away, herself finding it to be the only one she could truly count on to dazzle the crowd again and again.
In a flash of illusionary dust, she once again conjured the bear-like form of the Ursa on the stage, drawing gasps from the crowd. The magician trotted up to the creature, entering an exaggerated battle stance as the monster silently roared.
“Insolent welp! You think that you can defeat the Great and Powerful Trixie?”
The Ursa lifted up and stomped on the stage, Trixie’s magic shaking the theater. A few ponies fell from their seats at the display, quickly clambering back up to not miss the show.
Beams of magic shot from the wizard’s horn as she dodged and weaved around the legs of the stomping dust model, more silent roars flying from its maw. The beast clawed at the blue mare, only for her to roll out from under it and fire one final beam of energy at it.
In another flash of light and dust the monster toppled, falling over, spreading dust all over the stage. The shiny blue dust disappeared with a smokey explosion, leaving a ring of ashes where the illusion had been slain. Taking in her success, Trixie turned to the crowd leaning into a deep bow.
The crowd immediately stood up, roaring with applause at the display of magical illusion. Cheers echoed through the hall while a smile overcame the performer’s face; this is what she had always wanted.
Their applause and cheering died down as she exited the stage. Slowly, ponies began to exit the theater, altogether satisfied with the performance they came to see. It was as she heard the noise of the crowd begin to die down that she decided to stick her head out of the curtains once more, just to take a peek and accept any flowers that would be thrown at her.
As her eyes scanned the emptying theater, they locked onto the door just in time to see the flank of a lavender pony exiting. Driven by nothing but instinct, she sprinted out from the curtains, shedding her magician’s robes in the process.
Trixie frantically swam through the sea of ponies, desperately searching for the purple mare that had been occupying her dreams. She looked upon the different faces of the crowd, finding none of them to be that pony. Out the door she continued to scan, hopefully hoping to find that late-evening-streaked tail and celestial cutie mark.
Hours seemed to go by in a flash of smoke, the ponies in the busy street being constantly replaced with others. Out of breath, out of time and out of hope, Trixie slumped herself against the wall of the theater she had just performed in, her mind fogged by thoughts of that purple mare.
As she stared at the street, she questioned what she would have done, even if that had been Twilight. She wondered what she could have even said to her had they met.
‘Hello, you ruined and fixed my life. Nice to see you again,’ she thought to herself, running her hooves down her face at the stupidity of the notion.
‘Get a hold of yourself, Trixie. You had a good show, now is not the time to worry about such trivial matters.’ Her stomach softly growled as she thought. ‘Now is the time to go pick up your paycheck.’
The path of dirt and dead leaves crinkled under a determined magician’s hooves as an unfortunately familiar building came into view over the horizon. Although she carried herself with pride, a sneaking nervousness crept around her as she approached it, taking in a gulp of air before she pushed the wooden door open.
The creaking door of the tavern opened slowly, a bell chiming to alert the workers of the presence of a new customer. Trixie slowly walked inside, her cloak flowing as stares from around the room locked onto her.
“Well, would ya’ look at that. The great an’ powerful filly is back!” The same barcolt immediately took note of the pony entering, isolated chuckling on either side of the inn ringing out as they recalled the last visit of the pony. “Looks like somepony cleaned ‘erself up.”
To the barcolt’s surprise, the unicorn smiled as she approached the bar, an obvious confusion and discomfort being shown upon his face.
The earth pony shook his head to disperse his disease. “So, what would ya’ like t’ demand this time around? Another room? Maybe some ale or somethin’?” More ponies chuckled at the barcolt’s teasing.
“Actually, I wanted to thank you,” Trixie stated calmly as her horn glowed, the comedic stallion in front of her hopping back in mock fear. Her magic enveloped a small bag of bits, it jingling as she placed it upon the counter.
“An’ what would this be for?”
The magician retained her smile as she slowly turned away with a tip of her hat. “For telling me the truth.”
She couldn’t see it, but she was positive that a look of confusion slapped across the face of the stallion. Just as she intended.
Her mind fell to that of the young colt that had graciously and freely given her that bit outside of the restaurant as she exited the bar, herself wondering if the pony ever did get to see her perform again. That bit may have saved her life.
She shook the thought from her brain, her head turning to where her true objective was.
Ponyville.
Wind whipped in the face of the blue mare as she stared at the Ponyville library, her magic pulling her cloak tightly around her to keep out the cold gusts of air. Time melted away as she stared at the massive tree-home: the home of Twilight Sparkle.
She had received a tip from a helpful little mailmare as to where the home was, finding it to be only a few blocks off. She was quite glad that she had remained unrecognized in the town during her near desperate search. So far.
Her eyes followed the strong limbs of the tree as she stood, amazed at how a pony could call that grown building her home.
‘Not just anypony,’ she thought to herself, continuing to admire the structure.
With a gulp, she began to step forward, the wind continuing to lash out at her. Each movement was even more agonizing than the last as she thought of all the possibilities of what could happen. Silently hoping that nopony would open the door, she questioned what she would do when Twilight did.
“What if she shuts me out?” the mare said to herself as she stopped in her tracks. “Or worse? What if she doesn’t even want to see me? What if she has me thrown out of town? I wouldn’t blame her considering what I did.”
Mere feet away from the doorstep, she seated herself, her anxious mind racing as it ran through every possible outcome. She stared at the simple door, wishing it would just open and Twilight would hop out and accept her apology.
Her voice lowered to nothing more than a whisper. “What if... What if she does accept me? What will I do then?”
Tears slowly began to well up in her eyes, the wind continuously reminding her of how exposed she was. Slow moments of contemplation passed before she stood up quickly, shaking off her tears and tightening her cloak around her body as she took the remaining commanding steps up to the door.
The magician slowly lifted her hoof, preparing to knock as she sniffled in the cold, a shiver running down her body in anticipation. She swayed with the wind as she stood, frozen in place, her hoof shaking.
Exhaling a rough breath, her forelimb painfully dropped to floor, the tears returning to her eyes. The wizard slowly let herself fall to the floor, her hoof rubbing her forehead as she mentally contemplated the prison she had placed herself in.
Seeing no other option, her horn glowed, levitating out a pre-written note from her robes. The biting air entered her lungs one more time before she stood up, quickly pasting the note on the door before dropping a bit on the matt, swiftly turning and almost galloping away from the doorstep.
Her hooves slowed to a trot as she turned back to take one more peek at the treehouse just in time to see her hoof-written letter flapping in the wind. With a shaky breath, she lowered her head, ready to return to her self-imposed exile.
She walked back down the dirt path.
Cold, broken and alone.
