Appleloosa

Chapters

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6

Chapter 1

Appleloosa
By Kraken Albatross
Chapter 1

Dear Ms. Applejack,

We regret to inform you of the death of your cousin Braeburn. He fell from a ridge in his apple orchard and sustained fatal injuries. In his last will and testament, he left his entire estate to you. This includes his orchard, farmhouse, and a small sum of money found on his body. You may retrieve the will and his effects at the mayor's office on West Dragon Boulevard when you are next in town.

Our most sincere condolences,
The Town of Appleloosa

Applejack finished reading the wrinkled letter for the hundredth time and crumpled it up with a sigh. She turned to gaze out the window of a passenger train as it barreled across the prairie, heading west. As the sun slowly emerged from below the horizon, an eruption of brilliant rays painted the sky with countless shades of orange and purple. The earth pony took in the beautiful landscape as it rushed by her, unable to prevent the smile that crept to her lips. Hearing a murmur to her right, Applejack glanced over just in time to see Fluttershy nestle deeper into the adjacent seat cushion, fast asleep. Her smile broadened as she leaned back, attempting to discern just how long it had been since she first took the train with her future wife and the rest of her friends.

"Ten years..." she whispered so quietly that she wasn't quite sure she had said anything at all. The earth pony's eyes widened and she almost gasped, realizing just how quickly time flies.

After failing miserably in an attempt to not feel old, she looked down at the balled up yellow paper clenched in her hooves. The more Applejack stared at the letter she had received a month earlier, the more she wished it wasn't the sole reason the couple was moving to Appleloosa. After a brief moment of hesitation, she quickly uncrumpled the death notice and read it yet again, as if it would finally say something different. The mare simply couldn't help herself.

Applejack had trouble believing that her life could change so drastically in four cold, impersonal sentences, barely a paragraph. She also couldn't believe that of all the ponies in Equestria that Braeburn could have left his estate to, he had chosen her. While they had become close after Applejack's relationship with Fluttershy alienated her from most of the Apple family, she had always assumed that there must have been somepony in Appleloosa or any place else that knew him better. Then she considered his salt addiction.

Appleloosa had grown rapidly in its early years, and after the discovery of colossal gem deposits in the hills surrounding the town, ponies from all over the world came to stake their claim and make their fortune as the Equestrian frontier exploded. Consequentially, this meant that apples were no longer the dominant product of the region as gem hungry prospectors flooded the town and growers of all manner of crops set up farms to feed them. The town only kept the name ‘Appleloosa’ out of tradition. Braeburn apparently had trouble coping with the fierce, and at times, cutthroat competition and all of the stress combined with mare problems and who knows what else turned him to the salt, which lead to a slow and steady decline. Applejack sighed and hung her head, wishing it hadn’t come to that.

Regardless, Braeburn had entrusted her with all of his possessions and she was not the kind of pony to let down a dead cousin, even if he had gone astray. Besides, Applejack knew that it was time for a change of pace and an excuse for a new life had been delivered right to her mailbox. As the family at Sweet Apple Acres grew to include Fluttershy as well as Big Mac’s wife and two foals, money on the farm became tight. The income from one orchard simply wasn’t enough to support so many ponies, and Applejack was more than happy to lighten the load and pave her own way in Appleloosa. She was simply relieved that her wife had agreed to leave all of her woodland critter friends behind in order to join her. As Applejack considered her good fortune, Fluttershy stirred and groggily opened an eye to look up at the mare beside her. Applejack ran a hoof through the pegasus’ hair and smiled.

“Mornin’ sugarcube.”

“What time is it?” Fluttershy asked sleepily, wincing and raising a hoof to shield her eyes from the garish sunlight.

“Just past dawn. I reckon we’ll be pullin’ into Appleloosa any minute.” She sighed, obviously frustrated. “At least I hope so. We're already hours behind schedule! After all the fancy improvements to the rail and the engine and everythin’ else, the darn thing still ain’t on time!” She shook her head and looked back down at her wife, the scowl evaporating from her face. “You should try to get some more sleep. It’s gonna be a long day."

“What about you? Have you even slept at all?” Fluttershy couldn't mask the concern in her voice.

“Ain’t tired,” Applejack dismissed casually, looking back out the window.

“Oh.”

During the long pause that followed, the yellow pegasus searched her wife’s face. “If you’re nervous, Applejack, please don’t be ashamed, okay? I’m nervous too. Anypony would be,” she reassured, snuggling against the earth pony. Applejack couldn’t help but smile as she turned and draped a foreleg around her.

“Aww shucks, Fluttershy. I ain’t nervous. I’m just... strategizin’... Ya know... Gotta go over our plans for the day... And all that...” Applejack trailed off in her pathetic attempt at a white lie. She didn’t even know what she was saying. She simply shook her head and patted smaller pony. “All I'm sayin' is, don’t you worry your pretty little head ‘bout me, darlin’. I’m finer than a frog hair split four ways!”

"Frogs don't have hair," Fluttershy corrected sleepily with a gentle yawn as she rested her head on Applejack's lap and quickly drifted back to sleep.

“Pumpkin and cream cheese! Duh!” exclaimed an elated voice to the couple’s right. Applejack turned her head and chuckled as she looked across the aisle at Pinkie Pie scribbling furiously in a notebook, pencil in mouth.

“How’s the menu comin’ along, Pinkie?” Applejack called over to her.

“Superly duperly! I can’t wait till everypony in Appleloosa tastes my mega-delicious cakes, and pies, and cookies, and donuts, and muffins, and brownies, and eclairs, and churros...” Pinkie Pie rambled on. She had managed to stay extremely enthusiastic and energetic throughout the years, much to everypony's surprise. Age was apparently irrelevant to her.

“With your skills, Pinkie, I'd wager that the Appleloosans don’t right stand much of a chance. They’ll be throwin’ you all their hard earned bits once you set up shop!” Applejack cut off, grinning at the pink pony until a scoff shattered the pleasant atmosphere.

“Oh yeah... There’s nothing more lucrative than a bakery... We’ll be millionaires in no time...” drawled Rainbow Dash sarcastically, gloomily staring out the window at nothing in particular.

“Come on, Rainbow...” Applejack pleaded, her eyebrows furrowing and her grin shifting to a frown.

“Oh she’s just cranky because it’s early and she’s not a morning pony. Isn’t that right Dashie?!” Pinkie asserted, lovingly nuzzling the multicolored mane. Rainbow Dash uttered nothing more than a few grumbles and continued to blankly gaze at the horizon. Applejack sighed and reflected on the blue pegasus’ bitterness, spying a crooked wing that pressed up against the seat cushion. Ever since the accident that obliterated any hope of her ever joining The Wonderbolts, Rainbow Dash had become significantly more morose and distant. However, although everypony missed the brash and arrogant Rainbow Dash of their youth, Pinkie never relented in her seemingly unconditional adoration, and Applejack thanked Celestia for that. She didn’t even want to imagine what would happen to Dash without the pink pony in her life.

Pinkie Pie had suggested that the pair move to Appleloosa along with Applejack and Fluttershy almost immediately. Dash’s impaired flying ability made it impossible to keep her job with Ponyville’s weather crew and Pinkie could barely make enough money for both of them managing Sugarcube Corner. Unfortunately, Mr. and Mrs. Cake weren’t going anywhere and her marriage to Rainbow Dash created a sizable rift between them. The earth pony’s dream of one day owning the establishment was dimming every day, so the chance to open up her very own bakery in a pioneer town of apparently countless opportunity was was too good to be true. Also, Between Twilight Sparkle’s promotion to Princess Celestia’s chief advisor in Canterlot and Rarity’s explosion onto the Manehattan fashion scene, there wouldn't be much left in Ponyville for them once Applejack and Fluttershy left town. It was simply the most obvious course of action. As for Dash, she would naturally follow wherever her wife chose to go. Although she would never even dream of showing it, much less admitting it, all of her friends knew that Pinkie was the only thing in Dash’s life that mattered to the pegasus anymore.

Just as everypony went back to their own business, the train lurched and began to slow down. The prospect of their imminent arrival caused the passengers to clamor to the windows excitedly, all trying to catch a glimpse of their destination. However, once the train began to pull into Appleloosa, the hopeful smile on Applejack's face began to droop into an expression of horror. The town was so... different. She tried to think back to the adventure in her youth when she brought her favorite apple tree to Braeburn's orchard, and from what she could recall, it was hardly the same Appleloosa. For starters, the town was exponentially bigger, with muddy streets and alleyways sprawling in every direction. The buildings were crowded together and showed their age. The cheerful and animated settler ponies of her memory were replaced by grim and dirtied individuals, mostly stallions, shuffling through the crowds indifferently. Even the sky looked grayer. Although the rest of the passengers seemed undeterred by the sight, Applejack bit her lower lip and brought up a hoof to rub her head.

"Oh horsefeathers. What have you gotten yourself into, AJ?"

The swarm of bright eyed travelers flooded out of the train cars, eager to begin their own adventures. None of them appeared to be offput by the appearence of the town. Applejack and Rainbow Dash navigated the throng to find their luggage and arranged for it to be delivered to their respective lodgings. Upon meeting back up, the group looked about the station, admiring its brilliantly sleek design, a direct contrast with the rest of the town.

"Well at least the train station is clean..." Applejack commented under her breath, mostly to herself.

"It's not just clean! It's amazing! Everything is so stupendously awesome and pretty and I mean, just look at all the gold!" Pinkie Pie shouted a tad too loudly, apparently having caught the orange mare's quip. She twirled around shaking her forelegs at the entire station, especially the gleaming golden sign mounted at the entrance that read "Atlantis Locomotives."

"It is very... nice." Fluttershy agreed.

"The most nice!" Pinkie giggled. "I could just live here and sleep on the benches!" She pantomimed an exaggerated snore after flopping down on the nearest bench. Everypony but Rainbow Dash laughed.

"Then you'd be a bum." The pegasus looked around skeptically. "Sure, it looks fancy, but what good is that when the train doesn't even get here on time?" The other three looked at each other quizzically. She did have a point.

"Four hours behind schedule! Four!" Accused an angry voice behind them. The party turned to see an irate turquoise pegasus mare glaring at the team of stallions that had pulled the engine. Her striking seafoam green mane flowed in the light breeze that ran through the station, falling like water over her shapely frame. Even Applejack was impressed by her beauty, almost contradicting her impatient and commanding demeanor.

"Well at Prankton, the mayor demanded that we stall in town to let a magistrate from Canterlot finish his dinner and catch the train," one of the stallions defended.

"Do you work for the mayor of Prankton?" she asked, incredulously.

"No, but he said that if we didn't wait, he'd-"

"Then you tell him that I'll take full responsibility! I can handle blowhard politicians and nobles!"

"Well there was also this hot air balloon that-" began another member of the engine team.

"I don't have time for your excuses. I have a freight train that needs to be in Stableleen by noon and I need this engine to pull it. Not to mention the miles of track we're laying to Coltorado Springs and Hoofstone as well as maintenance on the entire Armadillo line. The last thing I should be worrying about is something as trivial as the trains being on time. So please, do your jobs," she interrupted, turning to leave.

"Yes, Ms. Atlantis," the team replied obediently in unison. The four Ponyvillians stood mouths agape upon hearing the pegasus' name, looking up at the sign and back down to the mare and her train track cutie mark. Applejack began to trot over to her and called out.

"Hey! You run the whole railroad!" was the only thing the earth pony could think to say. Atlantis stopped her brisk pace and rolled her eyes.

"Yes. Yes I do," she deadpanned.

"Name's Applejack! Us four just took your fancy train! It was mighty comfortable!" she beamed, gesturing to her wife and friends, introducing them one by one.

"Glad you enjoyed it," Atlantis responded impatiently, tapping her hoof and looking at the large golden clock at the center of the station. After a moment, she sized up the group, and judging by their eager smiles, she knew they weren't going to leave her alone. "So... Are you tourists?" she asked to speed up the conversation without being rude to her own customers.

"Nopey dopey!" Pinkie chimed in. "We're opening a bakery!" she informed enthusiastically while putting a foreleg around Rainbow Dash endearingly.

"And we're takin' over management of Appleloosa Orchards!" Applejack added. Atlantis took a step back and her eyes widened, obviously surprised and impressed.

"How do you like that? Some industrious entrepreneurs! Celestia knows, this town needs them. It's a pleasure to meet some capable ponies, since apparently none work for me," she said with a genuine grin as she warmed up to the group.

"Oh, we didn't mind the delays. It was just nice to be able to enjoy the scenery," Fluttershy reassured.

"That's all well and good, but it's still completely unacceptable for a legitimate railroad operation. Some ponies would rather die than make one rational decision for themselves... If only I could be everywhere at once to think for them!" The pegasus let out an exasperated groan.

"If communication's the problem, why don't you just hire some unicorns?" Rainbow Dash asked matter of factly. It was the first time she had spoken in the conversation.

"Excuse me? I employ many-"

"No, no, no. I mean, just put a unicorn on each train so they can wizard letters back to HQ, then you have your own unicorn to wizard the response back. There are spells for that, right?"

Atlantis raised an eyebrow and smirked. "Oh. Magic. Why didn't I think of that?!" She chuckled, attempting to minimize the embarrassed blush that flared up im her cheeks. "Well thought out, Ms. Rainbow Dash. I'll keep that suggestion in mind. Thanks for the input." She offered a nod to blue pegasus.

"No problem, lady. That was nothing! I guess you could call me a problem solver. A pretty great problem solver!" Dash responded, the bitterness slipping away for a moment as she flashed one of her old cocky grins.

Atlantis laughed. "Apparently so!" she conceded before turning to Pinkie Pie and pointing a hoof at Rainbow Dash. "Keep this one around. She's got a good head on her shoulders."

Pinkie giggled and nuzzled her wife. "For forever and ever and beyond and infinity plus one!"

"Good. Well I need to be off preventing the utter collapse of my railroad, so unless you need anything..." She trailed off, her eyes once again darting to the clock.

"Actually, since you're from 'round these parts, can ya point us in the direction of the town doctor?" Applejack's thoughts drifted back to the crumpled letter in her luggage.

"Oh no! Are you sick Applejack?" Fluttershy cut in, legitimate concern in her eyes.

"'Course not! I just want to ask the doc a few questions is all," the earth pony reassured with a confident nod.

"You'll be wanting Doctor Nevermore. He's set up at the end of Dead Mare's Alley, just around the corner there," Atlantis informed, gesturing out of the station at the street. The group gaped at her in horror. "Hey, I don't name the streets. I just work here!" She shrugged with a smirk before a thought struck her. "Just know, the doc is a real ass."

"Beg pardon? You mean he's a donkey?"

"No. He's just a jerk. And trust me, I know. I married him!" She winked before exploding into a gallop, spreading her wings and taking off. "I'm sure I'll see you around!" the turquoise pegasus called down as she waved goodbye and flew away. Rainbow Dash's eyes narrowed as she watched Atlantis enviously. Seeing her wife slowly lower her head, Pinkie quickly changed the subject.

"So how about all that stuff we have to do and stuff, huh?!" she abruptly spat out.

"We do have to shop around for vacant lots to build the bakery on," Dash confirmed with an ounce of enthusiasm after an awkward pause. Pinkie sighed in relief, grateful that she was spared the sight of a miserable Rainbow Dash, at least for now.

"While ya'll do that, I s'pose we can pay a visit to Doctor Nevermore," Applejack agreed. "Sound like a plan, Fluttershy?"

"Oh, of course. Whatever you want to do is fine," the yellow pegasus submitted.

"Okey dokey lokey! Let's split up gang! Meet back at the mayor's office at oh-noon-hundred-hours! Let's go, team!" Pinkie shouted, sticking a hoof out for a group cheer. The other three just blinked at her.

"See you guys at noon," Rainbow Dash said flatly, nodding at Applejack and Fluttershy. She turned to go, leaving her wife still frozen in place as she waited for three more hooves to bring it in.

"Take it easy, Dash," Applejack replied, chuckling as Pinkie Pie snapped out of her pose and hopped after her wife.

"Wait for me, my love!" she called out dramatically, chortling along the way. Applejack watched Pinkie go and scratched her head.

"Ya know even after all these years I still wonder how those two ended up together."

"I think they're such a cute couple," Fluttershy beamed dreamily.

"I reckon 'cute' is the proper word," Applejack conceded. "But it must be exhaustin'. For both of 'em."

"Unlike our relationship?" Fluttershy asked coyly.

"'Course, sugarcube. Lovin' you is as easy as fallin' off a log." Applejack chuckled and winked at the furiously blushing pegasus who was too embarrassed to reply. "Why don't we mosey on over to Dead Mare's Alley?" With that, the pair made their way out of the train station and into the crowded street.

The moment they emerged into the bright morning light, a pair of eyes from across the square zeroed in on Applejack and narrowed into slits.

"Now she finally decides to show up..."

Chapter 2

Appleloosa
By Kraken Albatross
Chapter 2

Fluttershy bit her lip as their hooves sloshed through the muck of the thoroughfare, trying not to let her repulsion overcome her. Applejack didn't seem to mind. The friendly encounter with such an admirable pony had mostly dispelled her initial reservations about the town. She hummed happily while trudging onwards until she was struck by an inexplicably ominous feeling, almost as if she was being watched. The mare stopped in her tracks and swivelled about in attempt to confirm or banish her fears. She searched through the crowd but couldn't find anything to suggest that her paranoia was well founded. After several moments of frantic scanning, she was beginning to think that she had been mistaken or even going crazy, nervously laughing off her silliness. Then she saw him.

Her gaze made its way to a two story building fastened with a large wooden sign that read 'The Pearl Saloon.' It was on the second floor balcony where she locked eyes with the dark gray unicorn stallion that had been watching her. Upon being discovered, the stranger's eyes did not waver and he continued his fixed gaze. Applejack couldn't put her hoof on the nature of the stare. It didn't appear to be inherently malicious or malevolent, but there was not an ounce of joy or kindness in it either. It was simply... intense. Applejack felt as if his eyes were piercing her very soul and she was suddenly overwhelmed with a bizarre terror. She broke off her futile attempt to stare him down and lowered her eyes, ashamed. The earth pony hadn't been that scared since she was a little filly.

"What's wrong Applejack?" asked Fluttershy who had kept her head down to navigate the terrain until now. Applejack didn't respond at first. She was lost in her thoughts, trying to make heads or tails of what had just transpired. She didn't dare look back up to the balcony.

"Applejack?" the pegasus asked again in a nervous tone, nudging her wife. The earth pony quickly shook her head, snapping back to reality.

"Huh?... What?! No! Nothing's the matter! Everything's just swell! Just a bit of a headache is all," Applejack finally responded, grinning awkwardly.

"How fortunate that we're already on our way to visit the doctor right now," Fluttershy beamed, never one to push a subject. She turned back towards their destination and resumed her meticulous navigation.

"Yep... how fortunate indeed..." Applejack warily followed after her wife. She could feel his eyes on her every movement until they turned down Dead Mare's Alley, letting out a sigh of relief when they finally got out of sight. Although the strange gray pony haunted the back of her mind, she could finally focus on the task at hand. The couple made their way down the alley until they hit a dead end.

"Is this it?" Fluttershy asked, confused. The structure in front of them was less of a doctor's office and more of a cabin connected to a large tent.

"I s'pose so," Applejack answered, spying a crudely painted image above the door depicting two snakes wrapped around a scepter. "You'd think that he'd have a nicer office, bein' married to a railroad tycoon and all," she added with an arched eyebrow. Fluttershy simply shrugged, waiting for the earth pony to make a move. She was clearly unsettled by the dilapidated facade of the building. Applejack sighed and took the initiative to approach the cabin and open the door, beckoning her skittish wife to follow. Fluttershy was even more unnerved by the darkness of the room before her, but after a gulp, she hesitantly followed the earth pony inside.

They were immediately met with the sight of a eggplant colored unicorn stallion busying himself at the far end of the room. The glow from his horn flickered on his shaggy dark blue mane as it lit up the cramped workspace, plucking various herbs that had been strung up from the ceiling and dropping them into a mortar. Not quite sure if the doctor had heard them come in, Applejack cleared her throat to get his attention. However, he continued to take no notice as he hobbled over to a nearby cabinet to fetch a jar of some nondescript liquid. Applejack squinted to peer through the dim room, observing the busy unicorn. She noticed that he was very thin, appearing almost withered, and that in place of a right hind leg was a wooden prosthetic. Her eyes widened in surprise, especially in light of the fact that he was apparently Atlantis’ husband.

“Beg pardon sir, but are you Doctor Nevermore?” she finally asked, tired of employing subtly.

“You can call me Pegleg,” he answered dryly, not even turning his head to look at them as he continued his work. Applejack hesitated awkwardly, not sure if he was serious or not. “What do you want?” he snapped in an irritated tone as he ground the herbs in the mortar with a pestle.

“Well, I was wonderin’ if you had happened to see to a pony who died from a fall ‘bout a month ago.” The mare fidgeted nervously, thrown off by the doctor’s gruffness. Fluttershy even stepped out of the claustrophobic cabin into the adjoining tent which housed a handful of sleeping patients in order to escape the uncomfortable atmosphere.

“You mean the idiot that tumbled from a ridge in a dehydrated stupor?” he asked indifferently, quickly added some liquid to the powdery mixture. Applejack was completely taken aback.

“Now you wait just a minute, mister. Braeburn was-”

“Oh no! Were you a friend of his?!” Nevermore asked in an overly dramatic and patronizing tone, turning to look at her for the first time since the mares had entered his office.

“Cousin...” Applejack corrected sharply, firing a glare at him.

“And what could you possibly have to gain from my autopsy on - Do not touch my patients!” he shouted, looking past the orange mare at Fluttershy who had begun to wipe the sweat off the forehead of a feverish colt, fast asleep on a cot.

“Oh my gosh! I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean-! I was just trying to-! I’ll wait outside...” Fluttershy stumbled over her own words as she darted out of the cabin on the verge of tears, the heavy door slamming behind her. Applejack was absolutely livid.

“You know what? Your wife was right about you!”

“That I’m a wonderful husband, an incredibly skilled doctor and an even better lover?” Nevermore mocked, not affected by her anger in the slightest.

“No! That you’re a real ass!”

“I knew she only liked me for my body,” the doctor pouted with an exaggerated expression of false anguish. The orange pony sighed and slumped forward, realizing that her anger was getting her nowhere. Nevermore acknowledged her resignation and spared her further sarcasm. “Why do you care about your cousin’s autopsy?” he questioned bluntly. Applejack looked at the ground dejectedly, digging her hoof into the floor. She swallowed her pride and decided to just get the whole encounter over with as fast as possible.

“It’s just that Braeburn was always so good on his hooves, even when he was... on that stuff. Seems a bit fishy to me is all..."

“You mean to suggest that he was m-m-murdered?!” Nevermore gasped, employing dramatic emphasis and faux shock to mock the earth pony further. He simply couldn’t help himself. Rather than take offense, Applejack blushed and looked away, embarrassed.

“I didn’t say ‘murder’ or anything of the like! I only wanted to make certain that his wounds were seen to after he died. Rule out foul play an all,” she asserted without looking up at him.

“Foul play is murder,” the doctor informed, sighing. “Listen. I did perform an autopsy and the body had no stab wounds, he wasn’t strangled, and everything that I saw would point to a death from impact. How your cousin came to fall from the ridge, I can’t say for sure, but there’s an obvious answer. He was a junkie and an idiot. He got dehydrated and wasn’t looking where he was going. It’s as simple as that." Nevermore turned back to his desk and continued his silently. He jotted a few things down on a large scroll before pouring the new concoction into a vial.

“Thank you kindly for your time, doc.” Applejack knew that the conversation was over. She headed for the door, careful not to make too much noise as she exited.

“You’re welcome,” Nevermore responded after a long pause. She turned around, taken completely by surprised that he had offered her any courtesy at all. “You sure chose a hell of a time to come to Appleloosa. Pretty soon, ‘foul play’ will be the least of your worries,” he added ominously with a shake of his head and grave but knowing grimace. Applejack didn’t even have an inkling of what the doctor could possibly mean, but she was not about to begin deciphering riddles. The mare simply nodded and left. As the earth pony stepped back out into the sunlight, she glanced over at Fluttershy who was moping about the entrance.

“Y’okay, sugarcube?” she asked, reassuringly nuzzling the pegasus’ neck.

“Yes... It was my fault.... I shouldn’t have interfered with the doctor’s practice. I just felt so bad for the sick little colt,” Fluttershy answered, looking up at Applejack morosely.

“You meant well and that’s all that matters as far as I’m concerned. I don’t care how busy the doc is, there ain’t no excuse for him bein’ such a sore ass.” The earth pony laughed, trying to at least slightly comfort her wife.

“Maybe...” Fluttershy conceded, the hint of a smile sneaking to her lips. “Did you find out what you wanted to know?” She eagerly changed the subject, hoping that the doctor had helped Applejack make peace with her cousin’s death.

“Yep. I s’pose Braeburn just hit rock bottom and he let it kill him...” the earth pony answered bluntly. “At least I know for certain...” she added, somewhat satisfied. “Well, we should be gettin’ to the mayor’s."

The couple made their way back down the alley out onto main street. As they turned the corner, it took all of Applejack’s resolve to crane her head towards the The Pearl. She let out a deep sigh of relief upon discovering that the balcony was vacant. The mare was grateful that she could continue her trip through the crowded streets with at least a little more peace of mind.

“I love it! Let’s buy it!” Pinkie Pie exclaimed, bouncing around a vacant lot on the other side of town.

“You said that about the last seven...” Rainbow Dash commented wearily, carefully inspecting every inch of the lot as well as meticulously calculating all of the pros and cons of its location. “And they all had severe flaws... Like being across the street from the town dump... Or being at a dead end on the edge of town... Or being right next to direct competition...” she continued monotonously, barely paying attention to the skipping pink pony.

“Pfffft! A restaurant isn’t direct competition, silly! It’s more like... indirect competition!” Pinkie retorted playfully.

“Even if it isn’t another bakery, somplace that serves food right next door will hurt business. You need to think about these things, Pinkie!” The pegasus turned to her wife with a look of desperation.

“That’s why I have you, Dashie! Because of your clevery cleverness, I don’t have to think about those things! I don’t have to think at all! Yay!” The earth pony giggled as she slung a foreleg around Dash’s shoulder. The pegasus quickly shook her off and sighed.

“So... I’m an enabler? I enable your... Pinkieness?” she asked, arching an eyebrow as she began to lighten up, her usual gloomy disposition slowly fading.

“Yup, yup, yup! Didn’t you know that’s the only reason I married you?” Pinkie teased with a devious smirk.

“Thank Celestia I have at least one use...” Rainbow Dash deadpanned. "And for your information, you wouldn't have such an awesome enabler at your beck and call if you didn't have such a fine flank. Just keep that in mind," she added with a grin before the couple broke out into laughter.

"In that case, I'll make sure to take extra good care of it!" Pinkie assured as the giggling subsided. "So what is your judgement on this plot, oh so wise enabler?" Pinkie asked, getting back to the task at hand. Rainbow Dash put a hoof to her chin as she attempted to appraise the lot's value.

"It's a corner location so there will be a lot of traffic, there appears to be no competitors in the area, and it's right by the orchards for faster and easier resupply..."

"Soooooo?" Pinkie Pie was almost falling over in anticipation.

"I say we buy it. We'll be well bought at five thousand and we don't go over seven," Rainbow Dash judged resolutely.

"Hooray! We finally did it! We have our bakery!" The earth pony exclaimed, throwing her hooves into the air in the middle of the barren plot.

"Don't get ahead of yourself, Pinkie. We don't even own the lot yet. Come on, it's almost noon. We can ask the mayor about the it once we meet up with Applejack and Fluttershy." She sighed and started for West Dragon Boulevard with a bouncing pink pony in tow.

A deafening clang erupted from the tilting decrepit clocktower that loomed over Appleloosa. While the apathetic townsfolk went about their business without so much as batting an eye, a certain yellow pegasus in the crowd squeaked in terror and leapt several feet into the air, taken completely by surprise. This repeated eleven more times as the bell tolled twelve o'clock. Conveniently for Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy's nervous fit was the perfect beacon to locate her friends in the crowded square.

"There they are! Looks like we can add clocks to the list of things Fluttershy is afraid of." The blue pegasus sighed and shook her head as Pinkie Pie fell into stride beside her, walking on her hind legs with wide exaggerated steps. The earth pony's front hooves hovered inches from her hips, apparently ready to whip out a pair of invisible pistols.

"Why are you walking like that?" Rainbow Dash arched an eyebrow upon noticing her wife's ridiculous posture.

"Reach for the sky, partner! It's high noon!" Pinkie Pie ordered in her best outlaw voice. Rainbow Dash could only gape at her with a blank expression.

"Really? Really? Is it going to be like this every day?" She groaned and brought a hoof up to rub her temple.

"We don't take kindly to Gloomy Gusses 'round here!" Pinkie responded, apparently ignoring the question as she drew an imaginary gun on her wife. "Bang! Bang!" was all she could get out before breaking down into a fit of giggles with a few snorts peppered in.

"Gloomy Gus? I'm not a Gloomy Gus!" Rainbow Dash scoffed angrily before feeling stupid for using Pinkie's... unique terminology. "You know what? Nevermind," she resigned with a sigh.

"Cause that's totally not the shmillionth time you've sighed today! Not gloomy at all! Or Gussy! Not one bit!" the pink pony teased sarcastically.

"Whatever." Rainbow Dash threw up a dismissive hoof as she passed Pinkie and approached the other couple. "How'd your visit with the doc go? Is he as much of an ass as Atlantis said he was?" she asked after greeting them with a small nod.

"Swell. And yes." Applejack confirmed curtly, not quite in the mood to recant the tale of her embarrassment at the hooves of the snide doctor.

"He wasn't so bad," Fluttershy meekly defended after quelling her bell induced trembling.

"You jokin' sugarcube? He made you flee his office!" The orange pony scoffed in disbelief.

"No way! For real?!" Rainbow Dash snorted as she failed to suppress her amusement. "He sounds awesome! Wish I met him!"

Applejack rolled her eyes. She knew that the blue pegasus would get a kick out of their awkward encounter, much to the earth pony's frustration. "Ya'll would be like two peas in a pod..." she drawled before turning to Fluttershy. "And I know kindness is in your nature and all, sugarcube, but ya don't have to defend him!"

"He was just doing his job, really," the yellow pegasus retorted after wincing at Applejack's scolding. "What if the foal had some horrible condition that makes him die if he's touched on the forehead?" She whimpered as terrifying and ridiculous scenarios flooded her head and caused her eyes to widen in mild panic. "I could have killed him!"

"Don't be silly!" Applejack groaned before realizing she would not be able to convince her overly forgiving wife. Deciding to changed the subject, she turned to Pinke Pie. "How'd lot shoppin' go?"

"Greatmazing! I would be all like, 'This is perfect!' then Rainbow Dash would be like 'No, I hate it!' over and over again until I was all like 'This is perfect!' and Rainbow Dash was all like "I guess I don't hate it too much! Let's buy it!' and then I was like 'Yipee!'" the earth pony explained enthusiastically with an an exaggerated deep voice for Dash's lines in the story.

"Well I'll be! That's wonderful! Do ya know who owns the lot?" Applejack smiled at her friends unwavering chipperness which she was envious of. If only everypony could tap into Pinkie's eternally good mood.

"Nope. It didn't say on the sign. I figured we might as well ask the mayor about the lot while we're here. The town probably owns it anyways," Rainbow Dash answered after firing Pinkie a glare for the terrible imitation of her voice.

"Guess there's only one way to find out," Applejack said before the group turned to the building before them. It was large, green and adorned with two gaudy, golden dragons. In between the gaping jaws of the statues rested glittering letters that spelled out ‘MAYOR.’

Upon entering, the four ponies took in the elaborately decorated lobby with faces of disbelief. The room, lit by bright paper lanterns and draped in fine silk, had carefully painted murals elaborately sprawled on the walls. Not only did it appear much more extravagant than the rest of the town, it also seemed foreign. As the group admired the extravagent decor, the door to the inner office shot open.

"-into an absolute mockery!" shouted a voice within the room before a white pegasus stallion with a neat gray mane adorned with a large top hat stormed out with a bitter scowl on his face. Muttering to himself, he made his leave so quickly the group barely caught a glimpse of the star shaped badge that gleamed on his chest.

“Was that... the sheriff?” Fluttershy meekly asked, disturbed by the stranger’s tumultuous exit. Before anyone could answer, a dark orange unicorn stallion also wearing a top hat appeared at the doorway, his head, still turned to the inner office.

"Terribly sorry about that... I know... Still on for tea tomorrow?... Excellent! See you then!" He finished his conversation and quickly departed, his face twisted in embarrassment.

"And I 'spose that was the deputy. I wonder what all that fuss was about," Applejack mused.

“Mr. Oolong will see you now,” the attractive young mare at the front desk called to them before anyone could guess. The group simply looked at each other and without further conversation, rose from their seats and entered the office.

Chapter 3

Appleloosa
By Kraken Albatross
Chapter 3

At the far end of the room, behind a very low table, sat a portly old earth pony stallion atop a large floor cushion. His mane was as brilliantly golden as the various statues in his office and even his jade colored body seemed to glimmer, despite his old age.

“Howdy, Mr. Mayor. We’re-” Applejack began, attempting to get the meeting underway as fast as possible.

“Hello young Applejack and friends! Would any of you care for a nice, hot cup of relaxing tea?” the mayor interrupted with a broad smile. His accent was as foreign as the decor of his office. He gestured to an ornate porcelain teapot before him, the steam still rising from its spout. Pinkie Pie immediately darted to the sit on the floor cushion across the table and beamed back at him.

“Tea?! For me?! Yes, please!” she exclaimed before Rainbow Dash quickly yanked the earth pony up by the scruff of her neck.

“Oh, no you don’t. Caffeine is the last thing you need.” The pegasus gave her a look of exasperation, as if she stood at the precipice of a terrible calamity. Pinkie Pie drooped with a pouty face as she sulked quietly.

“I apologize, Mr. Mayor. Thank you kindly for the offer, but we simply don’t got time for tea, or relaxin’ for that matter,” Applejack explained.

“The time to relax is when you don't have time for it,” Oolong responded, his smile never fading. "So young and full of purpose, driven on without a moment to waste." He slowly rose from his seat as his deepset eyes studied Applejack. "Perhaps when you reach my age, you will realize the importance of slowing it all down, like a captain whose ship runs aground... You can always wait until the tide comes around," the elderly pony mused with a wink. The orange mare arched an eyebrow and was momentarily speechless, not quite interested in the mayor's proverbs.

"...Maybe... But for now I just need Braeburn's effects, mister," she bluntly responded after a drawn out pause. Oolong's grin disappeared as he turned away from her and approached a large wooden chest behind the table.

"Such a tragedy. Braeburn was a kind and passionate boy." He heaved a sigh as he rummaged through the chest. "We all gather demons in the mirror everyday, but for some of us, the light fades before we can vanquish them. Such a pity," the mayor continued, shaking his head slowly as he retrieved a small parcel. "This is what you came for, yes?" The question was apparently rhetorical, as he handed it to her before she could respond. Applejack quickly placed the package into her saddle bag.

"Much obliged." There was a hint of sadness in her voice.

"I am certain that you will honor your cousin's legacy and make your family proud," he assured with a gentle smile as he sat back down and poured himself a cup of tea. His wisened eyes appeared free of any doubt.

"I appreciate the vote of confidence," she responded with a half chuckle, her mood recovering slightly.

"You emit an aura of aptitude, young Applejack. If I were a gambling pony, I would bet my fortune on your success." The mayor nodded before taking a sip of his tea. "Oh, wait... I AM a gambling pony! Speaking of that, who is up for a game of mahjong?!" he asked with a cheesey grin as he whipped out a set of tiles from under the table at lightning speed. The jaws of everyone but Pinkie dropped as they gaped at each other incredulously. Once again, the pink pony zipped to the floor cushion across from the mayor.

"It's on!" she challenged, hefting a sack of coins onto the table.

"Do not worry young mare. I will try to go easy on you," he said after a hearty laugh, impressed with Pinkie's enthusiasm. The mare gasped and furrowed her brows.

"As if! You're going down Oolong!" She intensified her determined expression before she was once again yanked up from her seat by Rainbow Dash.

"No, Pinkie! Do you even remember why we're here?" Dash asked with a long sigh. The earth pony blinked vacantly.

"...Mahjong?"

"No! Oh my gosh..." The pegasus groaned before turning to Oolong, who had been entertained by the display before him. "Look, Mr. Oolong, sir. We're looking to buy lot fourteen right off Sarsaparilla Avenue." Her patience was wearing thin. The mayor placed a hoof to his chin and began to think. The room fell silent as the group anxiously awaited his response.

"I am afraid I cannot help you."

"What?" Rainbow Dash asked as she rose an eyebrow.

"I believe that lot is owned by Black Hill, the proprietor of The Pearl Saloon." He nodded resolutely before taking another sip of tea.

"What?!" Applejack exclaimed, her eyes wide almost to the point of frenzy upon recalling the occurrence earlier in the day. Everyone turned to stare at Applejack, utterly confused. "I mean... how 'bout that..." She awkwardly looked down at the floor, blushing in embarrassment and cursed herself silently.

"To be honest with you, I am surprised that you are surprised. He owns half of Appleloosa's real estate," Oolong admitted.

"What?!" Four voices rang out in unison.

"In our humble town, we foster an environment of entrepeneurship. Ponies should reap the benefits sewn by the sweat of their brow and the strength of their back." he explained before finishing his tea.

"But a lone pony ownin' half the town? Sounds like a whole can of worms just askin' to get opened." Applejack wasn't sure if it was her place to tell the mayor how his town should be run, but at the time she just didn't care. Oolong didn't seem to mind, chuckling at the mare's anxiety and shrugging it off.

"Mr. Hill is indeed a... shrewd businesspony. However, that is what makes him such an asset to the town. There is no reason to fear free enterprise if one is truly competent. That is the reason Appleloosa expanded so quickly. We do not care where you are from, what you have done in the past, or what you aspire to do in the future. All that matters are the actions of the present. Concentrating your mind on that one simple truth is the only way to achieve your full potential." The mayor finished with his eyes closed, bearing a peaceful smile.

"Well I reckon you have a point there, Oolong," Applejack conceded as the other ponies reflected on the mayor's words.

"Not like it matters. We have to deal with this Black Hill chump anyways. He's probably going to try gouge the hay out us," Rainbow Dash grumbled in irritation, seemingly unaffected by the imparted wisdom.

Oolong gave a heavy nod as he carefully examined the blue pegasus. "I wish you luck, miss. You seem to have a fight in you that will not be easy to overpower. Remember this when you conduct business with him: Keeping one's wits is very important, but nothing is more necessary than keeping one's nerves. If your nerves go, you will not stand a chance..." Rainbow Dash simply narrowed her eyes and smirked with determination.

"Oh my... I'm glad I don't have speak with him " Fluttershy gulped as she cowered behind her friends.

"We all are, Fluttershy. We all are." Applejack chuckled at the idea of Fluttershy keeping her nerve in any situation, much less confronting an intimidating businesspony. "We best get goin'. Thanks for your time, Mr. Oolong," she added, turning towards the old stallion.

"My pleasure. If any of you would like to stop by for tea, mahjong, or friendly conversation, you are always more than welcome." He flashed a hospitable grin and wished them well as the four mares took their leave.

"Well that was hardly what I was expectin'," Applejack commented as the party stepped out into the thoroughfare.

"Some mayor! If he let's everypony do whatever they want, like I don't know, maybe buy half the town, what's the point of even having a mayor?!" Rainbow Dash huffed as she stared angrily off in the distance. "...Talking like we can't handle some sleazy businesspony..." she added mostly to herself.

"I'm sure Mr. Oolong does many things like... make laws," Fluttershy suggested quietly.

"Apparently, the laws don't sit well with even the sheriff if that dramatic exit was any indication," Applejack responded, not sure why she felt the need to side with Dash. The yellow pegasus submitted through silence, not wanting to perpetuate an argument.

"Well I liked him! He was like a friendly cute grandpa!" Pinkie Pie bounced along with a giggle which was met with a groan from her wife.

"You would. You'd just LOVE to gamble away our savings while sucking down tea with that senile, old coot, wouldn't you?" Dash snapped bitterly, dismissing Pinkie's approval. "Come on, let's get to The Pearl and size up this big shot." She gestured for Pinkie to follow.

"Actually, I was thinkin' we could join ya at the saloon," Applejack suggested somewhat awkwardly, a hint of nervousness permeating her voice.

Rainbow Dash stopped and quirked an eyebrow at at her friend. "Why? You have the key to the farm house. Don't you want to go check it out?"

The earth pony turned her eyes toward the ground. "Well I figured we weren't in a rush and maybe y'all needed some backup," Applejack answered before turning to her wife. "If that's all right with you, hun," she added.

"That's fine. I've never been in a saloon before," Fluttershy responded cautiously with a touch of naive curiosity.

"Whatever." Rainbow Dash shrugged and led the way. As the group made their way down Mane Street, Applejack bit her lip in anticipation. She was glad that her excuse was bought without much consideration. She could never admit that her true motivation was the stranger on the balcony. She had a hunch that he was the same pony the mayor had mentioned but she had to be sure. For some inexplicable reason, she felt the need to meet him face to face.

When the group finally arrived at The Pearl, they took a moment to take in the building. It loomed over them, casting an enormous afternoon shadow that engulfed much of the street. Even the carving of a giant clam, pearl included, possessed an unsettling quality. They could hear the low wail of a piano as the muffled notes sailed over them from inside. The music almost sounded sad. Even Rainbow Dash was beginning to be affected. The pegasus quickly shook off the ominous feeling that was beginning to creep up her spine and the four ponies stepped inside.

"Well slap me thrice and hand me to me mum! Four mares, here, and to top it all off, it's only three o'clock! It must be my lucky day!" A burgundy earth pony stallion stood behind the bar, grinning at them

"Uh... howdy," Applejack said awkwardly, surprised by the bartender's sudden and enthusiastic greeting. His extremely short, blood red mane contrasted with his enormous size. He was at least two feet taller than the mares and his broad frame was complemented by a set of huge muscles.

"'Ello there! Welcome to The Pearl! Tray of salt for you? Maybe one on the house for the pretty little thing in the back?" He shot a wink at Fluttershy who immediately blushed and turned away with a flattered smile.

"Oh my. I mean, oh no. I mean, no thank you... sir." She kept her eyes glued to the door, still bright red.

"As you wish, poppit. Anypony else?" He looked around, unfazed by Fluttershy's awkward rejection.

"No!" Applejack spoke for the group sharply, a twinge of jealousy in her voice.

"Actually, we're only here to speak with Black Hill." Rainbow Dash cut to the chase.

The bartender's smile gave way to a serious look of consideration. "To what purpose, love?" he asked slowly. Dash had to roll her eyes and shake off his manner of speaking. She didn't particularly enjoy being called 'love' by a stranger, especially a stallion.

"We're going to buy one of his lots," she explained bluntly, attempting to stare down the enormous pony.

Without saying a word to Rainbow Dash, he looked over to the brown pegasus stallion seated at the piano who gave him a subtle nod. "Black! Some mares here to see you! Looking to see about a lot, they are!" he immediately shouted up at the exposed second floor to an open door that was presumably the proprietor's office. The few saloon patrons that were in the building turned to the four mares with bewildered expressions before nervously turning back to their own business at the bar, poker table, and the like.

"Okay Pinkie, because this is your bakery, you need to do the talking at first. It's how you deal with guys like this. You soften him up, then we unleash the secret weapon, me, to swoop in for the close. Do you think you can handle it?" Rainbow Dash explained her master plan in a low voice. Applejack gave her a perplexed look, not entirely sure if Dash really knew what she was doing.

"Duh! Talking is what I do best, silly!" Pinkie replied playfully. Her face composed into an intense expression of determination that evaporated when a loud thud rang out through the saloon. It was followed by another, and then another as the slow and heavy footsteps grew louder until the open door was darkened by a dark gray unicorn stallion. His greasy, black, slicked back mane shone with a glint as he emerged from the office and leaned on the railing to observe the entirety of his saloon. Applejack's heart sank to her stomach upon realizing that it was the same unicorn who had been watching her. She made sure not to make eye contact with him as he surveyed the room.

"So these are the Ponyvillians I've been hearing about! Come from their civilized world to bestow culture, courtesy, and every other fucking thing to us uncouth savages, squatting like beasts out on the fringe of society!" the unicorn called down with a grin as he made his way to the stairs. No one had any idea how to respond. He appeared to be jovial and outgoing, but there was something sinister about him. All of the mares could sense it, but they couldn't put their hooves on exactly what it was.

"You've heard about us?" Pinkie asked cautiously, remembering her orders to do the talking whilst taking great pains to suppress her 'Pinkieness'.

"When you have a hoof on the throat of the town, you tend to hear things." He gave her a slow nod.

"You mean pulse of the town," the pink mare corrected helpfully with a smile.

"What did I say?" the stallion asked coyly, a sly gleam in his eye as he arrived at the table they had been standing at. "Black Hill, owner and proprietor of the joint in which you now stand," he introduced, locking eyes with Pinkie whose constitution was already beginning to crumble.

"Hi there! My name's Pinkie Pie and-"

"Pinkie Pie..." Black repeated with a bemused smirk.

"Umm... yeah. And this is Rainbow Dash, my wife." Pinkie gestured at the pegasus.

"Your wife?" he asked as he arched a brow.

"My wife," she confirmed with an uncomfortable nod.

"...Your... wife?" The unicorn seemed to be in disbelief.

"Yes, her wife!" Rainbow Dash shouted, glaring at him. After some thought, Black Hill's eyes widened in a moment of clarity.

"Ah." Turning to Applejack and Fluttershy, he shook his hoof in their general direction. "And you two as well?"

"...Yep..." Applejack finally responded with a sigh. However, the mare was less insulted by his bluntness and more surprised that the saloon owner acted as if their encounter earlier in the day had never occurred.

"Must be something in the fuckin' water over at Ponyville, huh?" A snide smirk crept to Black's face.

"Hey! Who do you think you are, buddy?" Rainbow Dash stepped forward with a scowl, fed up with his audacious crudeness. The unicorn raised his eyebrows in genuine surprise.

"The proper fuckin' question to be asking is not who I think I am, but simply, who the fuck I am. It'd do you good to discover that some time, buddy," he uttered menacingly right before his demeanor immediately shifted back to joviality. "Let's forget the whole thing, huh? No fuckin' offense intended. You’ll have to cut me some slack. I am stupidest when I try to be funny," he continued amicably before turning to the bartender. "Let's have a sack!" he called over, before the earth pony withdrew a brown sack from under the bar which was then hoisted into the air by Black's magic. The four mares could only watch as the unicorn took over the conversation. Even Rainbow Dash prevented herself from giving him further rebuke after his apology, regardless of how insincere it was. "I'm surprised Gladius didn't scare you out of the joint before I made it downstairs." Black Hill nodded to the bartender and opened the bag.

"Not at all. He was very nice," Fluttershy spoke up, blushing slightly. The unicorn turned to her with an amused expression.

"Sure, his cheery oafishness is endearing at first, but it gets old very fuckin' quick." Gladius let out a hearty guffaw at his own expense. No one else laughed. "Salt?" he offered as he began pour white cubes from the sack into a small tray on the table. The mares looked at each other awkwardly before Applejack chose to speak up.

"Thank you kindly, but none of us partake," she informed.

"Well I hope it don't shatter your dainty sensibilities if I 'partake,' myself," Black Hill said before immediately licking up the tray and letting out a contented sigh.

"...Go right ahead..." Applejack deadpanned as he was setting the tray down. The saloon keeper eyed the orange earth pony carefully.

"Judging by the adorable hat, drawling accent, and little apples plastered on your flank, I take it you're the salt fiend's relation?"

"You mean Braeburn?" She was beginning to be numbed to irritation after having the same conversation over and over. "He was my cousin. Name’s Applejack." The orange mare pursed her lips, uncomfortable with the fact that Black had decided to single her out. She realized that his watchful gaze earlier in the day must not have been coincidence.

"I fucking knew it. All of you apple picking cocksuckers have the same way about you. Come to take over his orchard then, no doubt?" Black said with a hint of inexplicable frustration in his voice, seemingly oblivious to the irony in his word choice.

“Yessir. Braeburn left me all his earthly possessions in his will."

“His will...” the unicorn repeated loudly, shooting a sideways glare at Gladius who hung his head sheepishly.

“Uhhh... Yessir.” Applejack was utterly confused. Black Hill looked back to her as his expression went from frustrated to compassionate.

“It’s got to be quite the ordeal, abandoning your home to relocate in the fuckin’ hinterlands, not accounting for the fact that there ain’t a single acquaintance, relation, or even simply a soul that doesn’t want to rob you fucking blind awaiting your arrival."

“I’m mighty grateful for the concern Mr. Hill, but I’ve got all the friends and family a pony could ask for right here.” The group of mares smiled as the saloon keeper struggled to suppress a gag.

“Isn’t that just darling?” he commented through his teeth, rolling his eyes. “Have you even considered the fucking headache of managing an entire apple operation on your own?” Black added, the feigned sympathy beginning to fade.

“I’ve done it before, sir... Pardon my askin’, but what exactly are you gettin’ at?” she asked hesitantly, beginning to see some sort of ulterior motive.

“Getting at? Oh, I’m not getting at anything! I’m just a concerned old pony who loses sleep every fucking night over the troubles and hardships of the young folk. It would just give me some precious peace of mind if I could take that cumbersome old orchard off your hooves, fair recompense included, of course...” Black Hill's intense, almost flaring eyes contrasted sharply with the mellow sweetness of his voice.

“Meanin’ you want to buy Appleloosa Orchards?” Applejack asked incredulously.

“How does one hundred and fifty thousand sound?” The unicorn's face hardened with icy resolve. Applejack almost choked as her friends’ jaws dropped.

“You’re pullin’ my leg...”

“Serious as a slit throat,” Black's stony expression did not change. Applejack closed her eyes, extremely tempted, but after a pregnant pause, she shook her head.

“Your offer is mighty generous, Mr. Hill, but that orchard is an Apple Family orchard, and no amount of bits could make me sell away my family’s honor."

“Honor being a couple of fucking apple trees?!” the unicorn hissed, venom dripping from every syllable. Applejack was taken aback by the sudden dissolving of Black Hill’s mood and simply blinked at him. After a moment, the unicorn sighed and and composed himself, pouring a few more salt cubes into the tray. He raised it up as if to toast. “Let’s hope you run it better than your fucking cousin,” he muttered before downing the salt. Applejack didn’t understand the implication.

“You knew him well?” she asked carefully, wondering if Black's interest in her stemmed from her relation to the dead pony.

“Braeburn? Of course! He was a regular here. How else do you think he became a salt fiend? He just couldn’t get enough of Big Kahuna’s music. Isn’t that right B.K.?!” he called over to the brown pegasus with the curly black mane who was seated at the piano.

“Correctamundo, boss! Old Braeburn did enjoy a tune or two,” Big Kahuna confirmed without ceasing his playing or even turning his head.

“Only when he was dehydrated out of his fuckin' mind, that is... See? Us degenerate lowlifes are all acquainted in some form or other. So glad you could join our humble ranks... Welcome to fucking Appleloosa!” he exclaimed in a resigned tone, toasting yet again with a third downing of salt. The unicorn grimaced as his cold eyes darted around as if he was deep in thought until Pinkie Pie finally spoke up.

"Ummm... Wasn't this meeting supposed to be about the lot...?" The earth pony wished she was anywhere else but the saloon. Black Hill snapped back into focus and narrowed his gaze at Pinkie.

"Of course! The fuckin' lot! You'll have to forgive me. I'm an old bastard, losing my train of thought and going off on tangents and the like. Which one did you have in mind?"

"Lot fourteen, pretty please with sugar lumps on top!" Pinkie replied before darting a hoof to her mouth, embarrassed that she let her 'Pinkieness' slip through. Black, however, didn't seem to notice with the potential transaction on the table.

"Prime fuckin' location! If there was anymore foot traffic, they'd have to call it a riot! Rent's seventy dollars a day to The Pearl. Tent only. No construction." The unicorn's amiable, businesspony demeanor returned.

"Actually, we want to buy it! A bakery can't bake many baked goods in a tent!"

"...A bakery?"

"Mmhmm! We'll be giving out free samples to everpony when we open up so you can come by and have all the tasty tasteables you can eat!"

"You hear that boys?! Finally! Our barbaric lust for cupcakes can be sated at last!" he shouted to Gladius and Big Kahuna who simply grinned as they worked. "How do I find myself perpetually beset by bewilderment?" he groaned to himself while rubbing the top of his snout.

"I'm prepared to pay..." she trailed off as she looked over to Rainbow Dash helplessly who then mouthed a silent number. "...five thousand."

"You'd pay seven," Black countered as he paced thoughtfully.

"What if I told you we would?" she asked slyly, beginning to feel more and more comfortable.

"I'd tell you that price isn't the present fucking issue," he snapped at her, visibly bothered by something. "What's your connection with Canterlot?" he asked suddenly, turning to her.

"Ummmmm... what?" She gaped at him.

"In the process of hearing things about you filly foolers, I happened to hear that you have friends in high places, specifically at the right hoof of Princess Celestia herself, that haughty cunt," he seethed. Pinkie and her friends were baffled.

"I'm sorry Mr. Hill, but I don't understand..." Pinkie's confidence began crumbling once again.

"At least she has her backwoods, inbred, bumpkin 'honor' to account for her presence in the town!" he shouted, waving a hoof at Applejack before turning back to Pinkie. "What's your excuse?! A fuckin' bakery?! You honestly expect me to be fooled by that fairy tale and set you up in a prime location not a block from my joint with backing from the cocksuckers in Canterlot?!" His eyes turned wild. Pinkie could only shrink back, speechless and dumbfounded. Rainbow Dash quickly stepped in between the two.

"You better watch your tone, Black. I don't care who you are, you do not speak to Pinkie Pie like that. I'm not sure what sort of ridiculous rumors you've heard, but we aren't spies for Canterlot, or secret competition, or whatever the heck you think we are. Pinkie is just trying to live her dream and open up her own bakery. That's all. You have our offer." The pegasus finished passionately with an intensity in her eyes that matched Black's. The two stared at each other for a long while until the unicorn finally broke his silence.

"As touching of a story as that is, spare me the fucking waterworks. Here's my counteroffer to your offer: go fuck yourself!" He glowered at her furiously before turning around to ascend back up the stairs, the door slamming behind him as he entered his office. The entire saloon turned to gape at the four mares. Even Gladius appeared to be shocked by his boss's wrath, and Big Kahuna went as far as taking his hooves off the piano keys.

"Somepony needs to wash that fella's mouth out with soap and water. His mother must be ashamed of him!" Applejack announced to the silent saloon with a huff. Satisfied with her awkward last word, she quickly turned to leave with her friends in tow.

Chapter 4

Appleloosa
By Kraken Albatross
Chapter 4

"What was that all about?! He was actually willing to sell the lot at a fair price, but because we know Twilight, he goes full psycho! How does that make any sense?!" Rainbow Dash let out a frustrated roar before hanging her head dejectedly. "Now what do we do?"

"I'm sure you'll figure out somethin', Rainbow. There's got to be other, more sane landowners in Appleloosa," Applejack reassured with a confident nod.

“What I don’t get is why that jerk head was such a meanie!” Pinkie shouted off to the side at no one in particular. “I mean, come on! Why does he care that one of our bestest friends is a fancy pants in Canterlot?!”

“I don’t know, but there is something really weird going on with that pony. Why did he want to buy your orchard so bad? Also, did you really just turn down one hundred and fifty thousand bits?!” Dash couldn’t help but stare at Applejack in befuddlement when she remembered that the earth pony had refused all that money.

"Like I said, there ain't no price that would make me sell one of my family's orchards... 'specially not to that foul mouthed saloonkeeper.”

“I thought you made a wonderful decision, Applejack,” Fluttershy agreed as she nuzzled her wife’s neck.

“Thanks sugarcube. Besides, if he was willin’ to pay such a hefty sum for an orchard, Braeburn must’ve had himself one profitable operation.”

“Whatever you say, AJ.” Rainbow Dash shrugged, hoping that her friend didn’t make a huge mistake. “Can we go to the hotel now? I’m exhausted,” she added wearily.

“We best be headin’ home too,” Applejack agreed. After exchanging farewells, the group once again parted ways as the sun began to sink in the sky.

Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash made their trip in silence, both of them lost in thought as they trudged through the muddy streets. Even the endlessly talkative party pony was in no mood for conversation. After a short while, they arrived at the Pioneer Central Hotel, a modest building with a rustic charm to it.

"Not bad, for having such affordable rates, huh Pinkie?" Rainbow Dash flashed a smug grin, pleased with herself for having found a decent hotel within their budget. However, the main goal of her comment was to simply break the awkward silence. For wanting nothing but quiet earlier in the day, Dash became concerned and bothered when her wish was actually granted.

"It's perfect. You did a great job, Dashie." Pinkie Pie couldn't help but stay supportive, even though her forced smile let on that something was wrong. It looked completely alien on a pony that was normally so genuinely pleased. With a frown, the pegasus opened the door for her wife and the couple entered the establishment.

In the lobby, a decrepit old unicorn stood at the front desk, staring off into space. Rainbow Dash hesitantly approached him and coughed to make her presence known. It seemed to have no effect, as the ancient beige stallion continued his vacant stare.

"Hey, I booked a room here for a few weeks. Are you-"

"Name?" The unicorn snapped to attention, turning towards Dash, but never focusing his eyes.

"Rainbow Dash." She tapped her hoof as she looked around the ground floor. The lobby opened up into a quaint buffet style restaurant populated by what appeared to be grizzled gem miners.

"I'm Gumbo Gravy. I make soup," he drawled with slow and heavy blink.

"Umm... That's nice. Any chance we could get the key to our room?" She arched an eyebrow, wondering just how many Appleloosans were touched in the head. Gumbo swiveled around with a hunched posture and snatched a key from a nearby hook, levitating it shakily over to the pegasus.

"Room twelve. Fill this out." He brought up some sort of document from underneath the counter. Rainbow Dash tossed the key to the pink pony who had been silently waiting in the corner.

"I'll take care of this, Pinkie. Go ahead. I'm right behind you." She tried to give a warm smile, not exactly her most natural expression, as her wife nodded and made her way up the stairs without a word. Dash's worried eyes followed her for a moment before turning back to the paperwork on the counter. It had a plethora of vacant lines for personal information as well as an enormous wall of legal disclaimers in almost illegibly fine print.

"Why do you need to know all this, anyways?" She eyed the form suspiciously. "Occupation? Former address?"

"Protocol." Gumbo's blank eyes were probably as vacant as his mind, the pegasus figured. There was no point pressing the issue, and besides, he probably didn't even know what protocol even meant. She heaved an all too common sigh, snatched up a pen with her mouth, and began filling out the form. As she wrote, she could feel the old pony's unfixed gaze on her.

"I like you... You're purdy..." His expression didn't change when she looked up at him with an expression of pure disgust, dropping the pencil onto the counter.

"Excuse me?" Dash was getting down to her last nerve. These Appleloosa creeps seemed to be endless and the pegasus wasn’t quite sure how much more she would be able to take.

"Not much mare folk around-"

"Shoo, louse!" An angry voice rang out from the rear of the lobby as a short sickly-yellow earth pony shuffled behind the counter and began to lightly smack the old unicorn. "I told you not to harass customers, you blithering simpleton! Go! Slither on back to the kitchen and don't come out, reptile!" He furiously chased the terrified Gumbo Gravy out of the room before quickly turning to Rainbow Dash with an apologetic frown. "Pardon me, madam. I'm afraid I am understaffed, and sometimes must enlist my cook to tend the front desk when I am preoccupied with more urgent matters. A bit of a buffoon, but still dear to me. What you might see as a grotesque abomination, I see as a beloved family pet..." the earth pony apologized, wiping sweat from his brow during his rambling while nervously darting his eyes back towards the lobby's back entrance. "Rattletrap at your service. This is my hotel," he added as he slipped back to the front desk, still sweating.

"Uhhh... Hi. And it's fine... I guess." Rainbow Dash suppressed a groan and picked up the pencil to continue her task, wanting only to go upstairs and lie down. Apparently sensing the pegasus' frustration, the innkeeper pleasantly gestured to the restaurant.

“Once you tackle that elaborate but necessary chore, feel free to help yourself to the buffet. Delicious soups! Warm biscuits, piping fresh!”

“When both of us was young, maybe,” quipped a grimy prospector sitting at a table within earshot as he poked at his plate with a grimace.

“Quiet, you!” Rattletrap snapped with an eye twitch before turning back to Rainbow Dash.

“Some of my guests are fond of jesting.” Rattletrap forced a chuckle for the sake of the pegasus who wasn’t even paying attention. Filling in the last blank space, she scribbled her signature and spit out the pencil. As she was turning to leave, a loud groan echoed through the lobby. Dash glanced to the rear exit where the noise had come from and saw a burly stallion pulling a sledge out the open door. On the rickety wooden platform was a squirming bundle covered with a white sheet.

“What is that?” Rainbow Dash asked as the innkeeper’s face dropped into a look of absolute horror. As she narrowed her eyes to examine the rustling heap, it emitted another bellow and a hoof shot out from beneath the cover. Rattletrap whipped back around the counter and stepped in between Dash and the door, blocking her view before she could get a good look. The mare thought that she had seen splotches on the draped hoof, but couldn’t be sure.

“That? You mean that business by the back? Oh... That’s just.... A salt fiend. Yes. Lapped up a heaping helping of the vile substance and raised a commotion. Had to be escorted from the premises. Yes.” Rattletrap fidgeted nervously as the rear door closed with a thud. Rainbow Dash arched an eyebrow, but was not in the mood and certainly did not care enough to pry further.

“Whatever. I’m going to bed.” She shrugged and started to make her way towards the stairs. However, much to the mare’s dismay, the innkeeper fell into step behind her as if he intended to follow.

“Of course! Getting adequate rest is well advised! So... A Ponyville native, eh?” the short stallion blurted in some attempt to continue the conversation for reasons Rainbow Dash couldn’t even begin to fathom.

"Coudsdale actually, but yeah, close enough.” She didn’t slow down as she trotted up the stairs, hoping in vain that she might be able to lose him.

“And both so close to Canterlot! It must be wonderful to have Equestria’s capital be only a short trip away!”

“I guess...”

“So you do often visit, I take it?”

“Only when I get invited by the princess or one of my friends. Way too fancy a place for me to hang out at. Not really my scene.”

“Ah! So you’re a personal acquaintance of the Princess? What an immense honor!”

“I don’t really think about it like that... And why do you even care about all that?” She stopped to face him with an appraising eye when they reached the hallway of the second floor.

“Just my natural curiosity, I suppose... As I peered out the fourth story window at the thoroughfare, mid scrub in the wake of the salt fiend’s upchuck, I saw you come into my hotel with another mare. I must warn you that room twelve only has one bed.” He immediately changed the subject with a grin that was far too wide to be natural.

“That’s all right.” Rainbow Dash couldn’t help but smirk.

“I could always rent you an extra room at a discounted rate!”

“That won’t be necessary.”

“Very well. Shall I wheel up a cot then?” Rattletrap asked naively as she gave him a sideways glance, not sure if she should be amused by his seemingly naive ignorance or insulted by his attempt to squeeze more money out of her.

“No, thanks.” By the time she made it to her room, the innkeeper was still right behind her. Placing a hoof on the doorknob, she gave him a weary look. The earth pony simply beamed at her for a moment before coughing awkwardly.

“Well... Feel free to ring if you need any fresh linens... or toiletries... or-”

“Good night, Mr. Rattletrap.” She didn’t let him finish his thought as she closed the door in the short stallion’s face. Once inside the room, she quickly bolted the lock and heaved a relieved sigh. Just as she slumped forward, completely drained by the weirdness of the day, she heard a loud sniff from behind her. Rainbow Dash hesitantly turned around to see Pinkie crying on the bed, her hair straightened and her face buried in a tear stained pillow.

“Oh no... Ummm... Pinkie Pie?” Rainbow Dash asked awkwardly, taking a careful step towards her. Although they had been together for almost ten years, the pegasus was still tremendously uncomfortable on the rare occasions that her wife actually cried.

“I’m so sorry...” The earth pony's voice was muffled by the pillow. “I ruined everything. I said I could handle him and I couldn’t. Now we'll never open ‘Pinkie Pie’s Party Pastry Palace’... I hate this place... And it was my idea to come here and I dragged you along! I’m so sorry...” she repeated with a sob as she curled up into a ball.

“Oh, come on Pinkie. Don’t say that,” Dash replied with a twinge of pain in her voice as she approached the bed. “You did great back there. That Black Hill guy is just psychotic or something. If anyone messed up, it was me getting ticked off at his dumb, snarky comments. I should have played it cool. But you totally nailed it. I’m really proud of you.” The pegasus climbed onto the soft mattress and draped a foreleg over her wife.

“...For real and for true?” Pinkie Pie asked with a sniff, rolling over to face Dash. Her red, puffy eyes searched for any form of solace.

“You bet, gorgeous.” The pegasus shed a tear of her own. "Trust me. We’ll figure it out. We always do,” she added with a confident smile, closing her eyes and pulling her wife in tight.

Applejack and Fluttershy were no more talkative than their friends during their long walk through the various alleyways and avenues of Appleloosa, stopping at several shops along the way. Braeburn’s old farmhouse was on the outskirts of town, so Applejack had ample time to plan the reopening of the orchard. She considered Black Hill’s offer and came to the conclusion that Appleloosa Orchards must have been a lucrative business before her cousin's death, despite his personal habits. Why else would the saloon keeper be so adamant about it? The earth pony assumed that she wouldn’t have to work too hard to get the place up and running again and began to feel her spirits lighten. Some of her anxiety was finally aleviating, regardless of how poorly their meeting with Black Hill had gone.

As the couple drew nearer, Applejack could barely contain her excitement over seeing her new home and the beautiful green sea of treetops peppered with gleaming ripened apples. The mental image was enough to make her heart race as she quickened her pace to gallop down the street that led to the agricultural district. Black Hill may have scoffed, and even her friends could never fully understand, but it simply was all about a couple of apple trees. They were a part of her very being, and she would gladly accept her calling with all of the passion it deserved, no matter how ridiculous anypony thought she was.

Sensing that she was closing in on her new legacy, Applejack forced her legs to work triple time as she rocketed toward the next chapter in her life. Once she made it out of the alley and onto the ridge that overlooked the orchard, Applejack immediately dug her hooves in and skidded to a dusty halt. For the first time in ten years, she gazed out over Appleloosa Orchards and her face contorted into a mixture of disbelief and agony. There was no vibrant green sea and no glinting ruby apples. Instead, she stood above a cemetery. Most of the orchard's trees appeared sickly and withered with many of them dead and completely barren. Their gnarled and twisted branches rattled in the breeze like outstretched forelegs begging for mercy, casting enormous and terrifying shadows as the sun began to slip behind the distant hills.

“No... How could you, Braeburn?...” she breathed as Fluttershy finally caught up, completely out of breath.

"Oh my..." The pegasus gasped and looked up at Applejack with a sympathetic frown. She knew how her wife could get when it came to apples, so she understood that it was best to give the earth pony some space. "May I have the key? I'll tidy up a bit and start dinner," Fluttershy said as gently as she could, knowing that her wife would need some time.

"Thanks, sugarcube." Applejack sounded far away as she mechanically passed on the parcel that mayor Oolong had given her, her eyes still fixed on the ghastly orchard below. Fluttershy silently nodded and turned toward the white farmhouse. As soon as the pegasus disappeared behind the musty door, Applejack bolted down the winding path into the orchard. She galloped past the countless wilted trees, her terrible destination burning in her mind. The earth pony clenched her eyes shut as she ran, attempting to dispel the whirlwind of thoughts that gnawed away at her.

Darkness had fallen over Equestria by the time Applejack reached the large hill that stood at the heart of the orchard. The earth pony could hardly believe that her old memory of the place was reliable enough to guide her. Yet, she had successfully arrived at her dreaded destination, almost to the mare's dismay. A lone tree topped the crown of the hill, illuminated by bright moonlight. When Applejack finally worked up the nerve to reluctantly examine it, her face dropped. The barren tree lay cleaved in two by an apparent lighting strike, leaving a putrid, rotting core exposed. The earth pony wanted to run away, getting as far as she could from the sight before her. However, just as the churning maelstrom of emotion threatened to engulf her, Applejack took a deep breath and was overcome by a sudden calm. Rather than flee, the mare slowly ascended the hill.

"Howdy Bloomberg..." Applejack's voice was free of any panic as she approached the sundered tree. "I'm mighty sorry 'bout not comin' to visit. I meant to. It's just that with Sweet Apple Acres, and Applebloom growin' up, and Granny Smith gettin' sick, and then Fluttershy... and everythin' else... I've just been so busy." She took a seat next to the splintered trunk and looked up at the stars as they emerged in the twilight sky. "And Braeburn would always make certain to visit us and not the other way around. I 'spose he didn't want me to see this, huh? Time sure does have a way of gettin' away from ya."

Applejack hung her head and placed a hoof on a gnarled root. "Momma missed you, ya know. I never did get another favorite tree or anythin' like that. I 'spose back then I reckoned that I would've had foals by now... Ain't it funny how life never turns out how you expect it to?" she asked with a forced chuckle as a single tear rolled down her face. "...But Fluttershy's great though. Best thing that ever happened to me. Y'all should've spent more time together. You would love her. I know I do..." The earth pony wiped her eyes and stood back up. "Anyways... I should be gettin' back. Don't want the misses to start frettin'. Goodbye, Bloomberg. Momma loves you... I'm so sorry." Without so much as a glance back, Applejack turned to leave as the full moon shined down indifferently.

Chapter 5

Appleloosa
By Kraken Albatross
Chapter 5

By the time Rattletrap made a hasty exit from the Pioneer Central Hotel, the lively nighttime bustle of the townsfolk had all but dissipated. The innkeeper's beady eyes darted apprehensively to every shadowed alleyway and darkened windowsill he came across as he hurried through the quiet town. His inherent paranoia came closer to panic with each step he took. Every ghoulish scenario imaginable ran through the earth pony's mind until he was convinced that an equally macabre fate awaited him at any moment. All it took was the hoot of an owl to send him cowering with a yelp behind a pickle barrel outside of the closed general store. Upon realizing the cause of his terror, the innkeeper angrily reached into the container and flung a wet pickle in the general direction of the hoot.

“Shoo, annoying bird!” he roared as the unlikely projectile impotently bounced off a barber pole several meters away. Realizing his own foolishness, Rattletrap sighed and rubbed his head before dusting himself off and continuing on his way. As his thoughts raced, he began to mutter to himself.

“Summoned like some mongrel pup in the dead of night! Exposed to assault by any desperado or monstrosity that might lurk about while the town sleeps... And for what do I risk life and limb? Nothing more than rebuke and unwarranted insults, despite my continuously proven loyalty and diligence!” Rattletrap spat as he flung a hoof through the air in frustration. “And yet... If I ignore his beckoning? A far more gruesome fate awaits me! More gruesome than the demise of the salt fiend Braeburn!” His breathing became coarse and choppy as fear swelled in his eyes, far more horror than any owl’s hoot could evoke. “Therefore... I must choose endless reprimand and humiliation as the lesser of many evils... For there is no evil more heinous than the evil of Black Hill... Damn him!” The innkeeper finished with a stumble as he turned the corner to face The Pearl Saloon.

It was the only lit building on the block and Rattletrap could see darkened silhouettes moving about in the second floor windows. He fumbled for a handkerchief to wipe his damp brow and hurried around the saloon to the back door. He found it unlocked as it always was, for no pony was foolish enough to try to steal from The Pearl, and those that were normally went missing. The instant his shaky hoof pushed in the door, a furious voice, Black's voice, erupted from upstairs.

"I gave you simple fucking instructions for a simple fucking task! How you managed to botch your one duty is beyond my fathoming!"

"Come on, Black! What do you want me to say? You've been chewing me out about this since we found out he had a will!" Gladius' accent was unmistakable. Rattletrap couldn't help but shake his head in begrudging agreement with Hill's assessment of the dim-witted bartender. As he began to quietly slink up the stairs in the empty saloon, a third pony, who he recognized as Big Kahuna, spoke up.

"It's because of your dumb ass that we have ourselves a situation. And when we have a situation that boss has to deal with, boss get's angry. And when he's angry, punk-ass chumps like you get chewed out. I don't know why you'd expect anything different, Gladius! Sure beats a knife to the throat!"

"You were there, too! You could have helped me look! It's bollocks that I have to catch all the flack for this!"

"Listen. It was my job to throw the motherfucker off the ridge. It was your job to find the motherfucker's will."

"But I-"

"Shut the fuck up! Both of you!" Black finally broke up the bickering with a loud sigh. Rattletrap used the momentary silence to announce his presence from the hall.

"Is now a bad time?" he awkwardly called out with a hopeful step backward. He could only dream of the potential response of 'yes' and the excuse to return to the safety of his hotel, away from such hostile environments.

"I called for you. How in the fuck could it be a 'bad time'?! Get in here!" After the roar of a response, Rattletrap immediately and regretfully zipped into the room he had been trying so desperately to avoid. Six eyes zeroed in on him as he fidgeted to once again mop the sweat from his forehead, accompanied by a nervous chuckle.

"Hello, Black. You're looking well. Might the cause be-"

"What did the butch say?"

"...The pegasus?"

"Why do you feel the need to repeat what I've just said back to me in different fucking terms?" The unicorn's glower was enough to send a shiver down the innkeeper's spine.

"She didn't reveal much. Just that she had been invited to Canterlot by Princess Celestia on several occasions in the past..." he answered after an audible gulp.

"And? Was the nature of this invite personal?" The distance between them shrank with several eager paces forward.

"I... don't know. That's all I could garner from our brief exchange. I swear I did everything I could! She expertly evaded my inquiries at every turn as if she was suspicious of my intentions!" Rattletrap's pleading eyes did nothing to temper the molten fury in Black's glare.

"Outmaneuvered by a gimp! You really are a fucking wonder, you know that, Rattletrap?" The saloon keeper gave the earth pony a look of disgust before turning away and pounding a hoof on his desk. "So at the end of the day, we still know nothing concrete about the filly foolers' personal connection to the high and mighty cunt aside from a vague fucking 'invitation'!" A blood vessel bulged on his neck as he downed a full tray of salt that had been waiting on a nearby windowsill. Black Hill seethed as he gazed out at the empty thoroughfare through the dirty glass and tried to focus his swirling thoughts.

"If it's the orchard you want, why not deal with the mares the same way you dealt with the salt fiend, Celestia be damned? I hold the key to the room of two of them and the other two reside on the outskirts of town, away from prying eyes! It shouldn't be too difficult a task for Gladius and Big Kahuna to bushwhack them without detection!" The yellow earth pony's voice cracked as he was swept up into his scheme more than anypony was expecting, violently waving is hoof about to mimic a brutal stabbing.

"My, aren't you a saucy one?!" Gladius chuckled in surprised amusement as the innkeeper struggled catch his breath.

"For real! Check out the big balls on Rattletrap! Little dude is cold blooded!" Big Kahuna nudged the bartender and joined in the laughter.

"You have no fucking clue, do you, Rattletrap? I'm beginning to doubt that you even hear yourself when you open your fucking mouth." Black Hill turned back towards the three in weary frustration. "Believe you me... I, more than any, long for the days when a cut across the throat meant resolution, but that idea is fucking terrible." Rattletrap could only blink at the unicorn.

"But... Murdering the Ponyvillians and conducting a far more thorough search for a will, along with its subsequent destruction, would finally put the orchard up for auction... Which was the intended goal of the original plan, correct?" His pleading eyes searched in vain for some manner of vindication.

"Let's assume assassins as competent as you three manage to slaughter the lot of them without any difficulty. Then let's assume that you don't leave a trail of evidence leading directly to my doorstep that is so fucking glaring, even that imbecile sheriff Muttonchop would be remiss not to notice. So having eluded the gallows, we execute our master stroke and all live happily ever after, rich beyond our wildest dreams!" The patronizing sarcasm in his voice caused Rattletrap's confidence in his idea to shatter. "Is that how this fantasy scenario plays out in your empty fucking skull?" the saloon keeper spat out, the blunt venom returning to his tone.

"I suppose... Well not exactly-"

"So you never even considered why I asked you to help me fucking gauge their connection to Canterlot?!"

"I had merely assumed-"

"Did you then assume that if these cunts were personal fucking friends of the princess, her godliness might be upset to learn of their sudden disappearance? Did you then assume that upon her seeking answers, she might not be as easy to fool as the sheriff, considering that she knows the unsavory fucking lot that we are, having learned that lesson nearly a decade ago when she ran us out of Canterlot?!"

He whisked a salt tray off the desk and sent it flying into a wall, shattering it instantly. All eyes were on Black as he heaved slow, deep breaths. "...So... If you'd prefer that your flesh didn’t get incinerated by the fury of a thousand suns... probably obliterating the whole fucking town in the process... the dykes from Ponyville are not to be harmed. Do you fucking understand me?" He leveled a piercing stare at all three of his wide-eyed subordinates. The room was silent as they wordlessly nodded in obedience. Black sighed, slumping into the seat behind his desk, making sure to smooth out his normally tidy mane, which had become disheveled in the course of his rant. He knew that he had to at least try to calm down once the ratio of 'fucks' to non-profanity became obscene. However, he couldn't help but twitch as the three other stallions simply stared at him.

"Well? Why the fuck are you still here?" He groaned as he reached for another tray of salt, hoping in vain that it might make the ponies in his employ seem at least slightly less idiotic.

"Just one more item to report, sir! A gues-"

"Get the fuck out, Rattletrap..." Black cut the innkeeper off yet again as Gladius and Big Kahuna slipped out, lest they reignite the fury of their boss.

"It's just that one of my guests seems to have come down with the same ailment as that patron of yours did yesterday morning!" The earth pony spoke quickly as he slowly shuffled toward the door. "Horrible red boils! Foul fits of vomiting! Scalding fever! I fear plague..." Rattletrap disappeared behind the doorframe as Black Hill's eyes widened with a gleaming flash.

"Get back in here!" he shouted before a yellow head darted back into the room.

"I just thought you should know..."

"The cocksucker that came down with the 'plague', did you send him to the Doc's?"

"Well, yes. I assumed-"

"You and your fucking assumptions..." The saloon keeper rolled his eyes and bit his lip in frustration. "...Regardless, I want you to stop by Nevermore's first thing in the morning."

"Doctor Nevermore doesn't like me! He always makes a point to mock and belittle me, no matter how cordial I try to be!"

"We wouldn't want your feelings to get hurt, would we?..." He smacked his forehead with a hoof, bringing it down over his face. "Nevermind. I'll send Gladius." He shook off his disbelief and rose from his seat with renewed animation, an incredibly pleased look on his face.

"...To what purpose?" Rattletrap could not contain his curiosity in Black Hill's sudden shift in disposition.

"You'll learn soon enough... Now get the fuck out."

"Another tray, Braeburn, ol' chum?"

"You always know just what I need, Gladius..." slurred a yellow stallion that was slumped over the bar, too far gone to even lift his head, a filthy wide-brimmed hat drooping over his bloodshot eyes. Such a scenario had become a nightly routine in recent years, so much so that the earth pony was becoming unfamiliar with any part of town that was not The Pearl.

"Not like it's any fuckin' accomplishment to guess that just what a salt fiend needs... is more fucking salt..." A greasy haired unicorn strode up beside the patron amidst the noisy saloon crowd and rolled his eyes.

"Only you would judge me and my... personal habits as I fill your coffers with hard earned bits..." Braeburn shook a dismissive hoof as he stuck out his tongue to lap at the salt cubes in front of him, nodding along to the piano.

"Generally when I conduct business with other ponies, I expect them to be at least moderately fucking sober." He smacked the tray off the bar and gave Gladius a stern nod. "He's cut off. I can't have him passing out in the middle of negotiations." The horror in Braeburn's eyes multiplied as each cube of salt fell to the ground and scattered across the room.

"Noooo!!!!" Braeburn yelled as he heaved off the barstool in a heroic attempt to leap to the salt's rescue, but instead fell squarely on his face with a loud thud.

"Oh, for fuck's sake! Get the fuck up, you loopy cunt!" Black gave an aggravated sigh before hoisting the yellow pony off the floor with his magic and placing him back on the stool.

"Don't worry so much! I'm okay! I'm okay! All in one piece!" He swiveled around erratically to face the saloon keeper with a sloppy smile.

"Have you even considered my offer?" Black's steely expression betrayed that he was clearly unamused by the shenanigans.

Braeburn took a moment to process the question, bringing a hoof to his chin in serious concentration. When he finally comprehended what was asked and actually remembered the offer, his eyebrows suddenly furrowed and he reached out to poke Black in the chest. "...You think you're so great, dontcha?"

"...What?"

"The mighty Black Hill thinks he can take my orchard away from me, even though he knows it's all I have left!"

"At a fair price that nopony else would even dream of paying, after you ran that shitshow of an operation into the fucking ground!"

"Then what would I do, huh?!"

"Buy enough salt to finally fill the emptiness in your soul? I don't fucking know, and that really is none of my concern. You should be fucking grateful that I'm willing to pay you as much as I am."

"You can’t have everything Black. Everypony thinks I’m so stupid! ‘Who cares what Braeburn thinks?! He’s an idiot!' Well let me tell you something, mister... I was one of the first settlers to Aaaaaaaapleloosa! My family named the town, and now you’re tryin’ to buy me out! Well, I’m not stupid enough to miss the glow of your horn in the hills my of my orchard at night! What were you doin’ up there?!”

The unicorn’s expression went from bewildered exasperation at a drunkard’s harmless ramblings to deadly composure in an instant. “I have no idea what you’re talking about. Have you ever considered that it might be the salt, fucking with your head as it so often does?”

“I know what I saw and I even know why you want my orchard so bad. You were lookin’ for gems and you must have found em!”

“...Accept the offer, Braeburn.” Although Black Hill’s mouth gave away no emotion whatsoever, his cold and calculating eyes behind the command made even Gladius uncomfortable. The burgundy earth pony looked back and forth between his employer and his regular and chuckled nervously.

“I think you should listen to him. You’re not think-”

“No! Not this time! It’s my property and I’m gonna be the one to get rich off it! And if you try to use any of your fancy business tricks to swindle me out of my own property, forget it! I’m gonna ask my cousin Applejack to help me, and she is a close friend of Twilight Sparkle. You may have heard of her. She's only Princess Celestia’s advisor! So don’t even try nothin’! Ya hear me?! Nothin'! Good day, sir!” Braeburn dramatically kicked over his stool and headed toward the door, with a few wobbles in his step. Black gave one look toward the piano and the music stopped. Big Kahuna intercepted the earth pony at the exit and put a friendly hoof on his shoulder.

“Hold up, Braeburn. You aren’t looking too hot. How much salt have you had, dude?”

“I dunno. Lost track a few hours ago...” Braeburn’s head drooped as the adrenaline from his conversation with Black began to wear off and his stupor reclaimed him.

“Why don’t I walk you home, make sure you don’t hurt yourself or anything unfortunate like that?” The piano player’s bright white teeth gleamed as he grinned. Braeburn thought for a moment, acknowledging that he had to be escorted to his farmhouse many times in the past.

“Well sure, I guess... Thanks kindly..." He gratefully, if not awkwardly, patted the pegasus' wing, before slumping forward into him.

"No problemo! Just gotta clear it with the big guy first. You understand." After pushing off Braeburn, he made his way toward the bar, his eyes fixed on Black's emotionless face. Big Kahuna offered his boss a subtle ear, and without so much as a blink, in a hushed voice devoid of any emphasis, Black Hill gave the order.

"Make it look like an accident."

Chapter 6

Appleloosa
By Kraken Albatross
Chapter 6

For the first time, Applejack dreamt of her mother.

The orange mare stood in the middle of a verdant apple orchard, each lush tree brimming with gleaming ripened fruit. Her grin spread wider than what most would consider physically possible as she let her mane down and just ran. As she galloped through the pristine valley, the landscape ahead of her inexplicably swelled up to form a hill topped with a lone tree. With wide eyes, the earth pony darted to its peak and was face to face with a healthy apple tree that seemed to smile down at her.

“Bloomberg! You’re all right!” She leapt through the air and tightly wrapped her hooves around the base of the trunk.

“Of course I am, momma! What would give you the silly notion that I wasn’t?!” boomed a loud, pleasant voice from the tree.

“Never you mind about that, sugarcube. All that matters is that you’re safe. I’ll never abandon you again. I swear.” Applejack’s tears ran down the smooth bark as she clutched tighter.

No reply.

“Bloomberg?” A knot of fear landed in the earth pony’s gut and she hesitantly opened her eyes, looking up towards the apple tree’s canopy. To her horror, there was no fruit, no leaves, nothing but gnarled branches snaking up from a cleaved husk. Almost immediately, the sky morphed from crystal clear to swirling, crimson clouds. Then it rained fire. The entirety of the once perfect orchard erupted into writhing pillars of flame.

“No! Everythin’ was fine a minute ago!” Her eyes filled with disbelief and terror as she bolted through the sea of burning trees. In the chaotic panic of her galloping, she tripped over something large and tumbled forward into the dirt. She looked down at her hooves to see that they were covered in blood, slowly turning back in morbid anticipation of what she had stumbled over. It was her cousin’s twisted, bloody corpse.

“Braeburn?!” The sight of the mangled mound of limbs and hair made Applejack nauseous. She brought a hoof to her mouth and fought back a gag when she heard a low, snide chuckle behind her.

“A lot of fucking good that ‘family honor’ is doing you now, huh?” It was Black Hill, casually dusting himself off. “Looks like you gambled wrong.” Applejack simply roared and lunged at him, viciously swinging her legs at the saloon keeper, only to see her blows land ineffectively. He didn’t even flinch. The stallion’s snide chuckling turned to full-blown, demonic laughter as the flames of the firestorm engulfed him.

“What’s happening?!” the mare screamed as she collapsed, covering her face as the oppressive heat from the surrounding inferno overwhelmed her.

“Don’t be afraid, Applejack.” A strange yet familiar feminine voice echoed around the mare as she felt the ground disintegrate below her. She carefully removed the hooves from her face and was met with the sight of a reddish orange earth pony mare floating in a black abyss.

“You don’t recognize your own mother?” the spectre asked with a warm smile. The question made Applejack realize that she, in fact, didn’t. It had been so long since her parents had died, she could barely remember their faces. She couldn’t even be sure if the mare before her was actually her mother, or a loose approximation of her subconscious.

“Why are you here? You’re not real. You died.” Applejack turned away, only to see the apparition facing her once again.

“You should be askin’ yourself that question. You’re the one who called me here.” She hovered closer, her eyes filled with concern. A translucent hoof rose to brush the hair from her daughter’s face before gently tracing the stress lines that marked it. Applejack flinched at the touch and lowered her eyes, hoping that she could simply will her alleged mother away. “You look terrible, Applejack. Have you been gettin' enough sleep?”

“Oh yeah?! Well unlike you, I have responsibilities! Ponies who depend on me! An orchard that’s in one heck of a mess! And also unlike you, I don’t plan on dyin’ on those responsibilities! So excuse me for havin’ bags under my eyes and a few wrinkles!” Applejack didn’t understand why she was suddenly overcome with such a furious anger at this creation of her own mind, but she certainly didn’t care.

“Still so stubborn after all these years. That’s my girl.”

“Yeah, well somepony has to figure out how to fix everything...” The orange mare hung her head wearily, her rage subsiding.

“If you want, you’ll find a way.” The phantom placed a reassuring hoof on her daughter’s shoulder.

“You always used to say that. But I ain't a filly no more. You can’t just spew candy coated lies and expect me to believe em’ and actually think that everything is gonna be okay!” Applejack bitterly spit out as she knocked away the motherly hoof and clenched her eyes shut.

“But everything is gonna be okay, my little apple. You just need to learn how to let ponies help you. You try so hard to be strong all the time. Why not let your guard down just once? Swallow your pride? You didn't even talk to Fluttershy about the orchard bein' in shambles. You just pretended like nothin' was wrong!" Her voice rose with stern parental authority, but there was a hurt, pleading sympathy in the tone.

"...So? ...I-I didn't want her to worry." Applejack lowered her head sheepishly, her ears down. Her thin excuse didn't even manage to convince herself. She would have glued her eyes to the floor if there had been one beneath her.

"You and I both know that she'll worry about you even if there ain't a proper reason to. If you weren't so proud, you might be able to let somepony shoulder your burdens with you." Applejack’s mother reached out to give her daughter one last hug, but before she could make contact, the ghastly figure began drifting back into the nothingness that surrounded them.

“Why should I trouble anypony with my burdens when they’re mine to bear?” the younger mare asked softly, more to herself than anything else.

The voice that called back was faint as it slipped into the void. “But they aren’t. You have so many wonderful friends who would help you if you’d only let them...”

Applejack’s eyes cracked open, only to snap shut immediately. The quaint master bedroom of the farmhouse was bathed in golden morning light, and her sleep had been far too restless for her to greet the day with any enthusiasm. After a groan, she groggily stretched her legs out to grab the pegasus that normally slept beside her. To her surprise, her cast yielded no catch.

"Fluttershy?" The bed was empty besides the mare who couldn't remember the last time her wife had actually woken up before her. Sensing that something was off, Applejack glanced at the dusty clock on the wall.

"Eleven Thirty?!" Fully awake, she rubbed her head and mentally kicked herself for her own laziness. The farmpony was accustomed to rising at the crack of dawn. Wasting almost half the day in bed was inexcusable, even if her sleep had apparently been more restless than she had thought. No longer concerned about Fluttershy's whereabouts, Applejack promptly leapt out of bed, tossed on her hat, and trotted downstairs as she went over the day's agenda in her head.

"Just need to rustle up them addresses..." she muttered to herself as she rummaged through Braeburn's old desk. When she found an address book, she let out a sigh of relief. For being a degenerate ‘salt fiend’ that allowed his orchard to fall into decay, he was at least organized enough to keep a few records. After flipping open the cover of the musty book, she saw the ‘Lady Types’ section denoted in large, barely legible letters.

“Movin’ along then...” She blushed and choked a little, carefully skipping over the chunk of pages that that composed a majority of the book. Applejack decided that after all, it was best to respect the privacy of other ponies, even dead ones. After hoofing through the worn notebook for a moment longer, she came to the 'Farmhands' category. She'd be the first to admit that the grin that spread across her face was much larger than the small victory warranted, but the earth pony couldn't help but feel optimistic, even in light of the previous day's events. The mare was even beginning to forget her bizarre dream.

Applejack removed the appropriate pages and made her way to her way to the door before spying a note that rested on the endtable by the coat rack. She bent down to read Fluttershy's tiny, flowery handwriting.

Gone to the market to pick up some things I missed yesterday. There's a salad for you on the kitchen table. Please eat something before you leave.

-Fluttershy

"Yes ma'am." Applejack chuckled to herself as she went to obey her wife's orders, discovering a hearty bowl of lettuce, fruit, and nuts on the table as promised. The earth pony normally preferred sugary apple pastries, but she didn't mind Fluttershy's healthier creations. Still, she couldn't help but wonder if the pegasus was trying to send a message. She quickly looked back to examine her figure and concluded that she hadn't let herself go as she sat down to eat. Before Applejack took a bite, she noticed that there was another note next to her bowl.

Thank you. I'll be back sometime this afternoon. Please don't work yourself too hard. Everything's going to be fine. I love you.

-Fluttershy

"Everything's gonna be fine, huh? You know somethin ain't right when she’s tellin' me that." With a soft smile, she shook her head and sighed contently. "What did I ever do to deserve that mare?"

"Oh, Fluttershy. You're so bad." A butter yellow pegasus scolded herself as she walked through Appleloosa's crowded market square, a dainty basket slung over her wing. "But she just looked so exhausted last night. I had to let her sleep in." The retort was convincing enough to allow the pegasus to grin as deviously as was possible for her.

"Yes. It was for her own good. Well done, Fluttershy." With a satisfied nod, she began to peruse the various booths and stands of Appleloosa's merchants.

After an hour, her basket was filled with a potpourri of mostly necessities as well as a few items that were not so necessary. The pegasus was experiencing particular buyer's remorse about the 'soap with a prize inside,' as the especially grimy vendor put it. It just sounded so enticing at the time. Right as she resolved to scold herself later for her impulsiveness, Fluttershy saw a three legged unicorn stallion hobbling directly towards her.

"You!" Doctor Nevermore began poking and prodding the pegasus as soon as he reached her, moving around to examine her body with an appraising look.

"Ex-excuse me?" was all Fluttershy could say as she repeatedly flinched and began to shut down from the sudden invasion of her personal space.

"You touched my patient yesterday, right? The colt?" He ignored her whimpering and reached a hoof up to feel her forehead.

"Y-yes, but I already apologized for-"

"Have you experienced any fever, vomiting, fatigue, or back pain since then?" He lifted up her forelegs to check the pegasus' underside. Fluttershy was completely flushed and bewildered, but answered him anyways. He was a doctor, after all.

"No-ooauuuughll" Nevermore used that opportunity to levitate a wooden tongue depressor into her mouth and use his horn to light up her throat. After a thorough inspection, he took a step back.

"Lucky you. You're immune. Let's go." He turned and beckoned her with a scrawny hoof before heading back out of the market.

"Well thank goodness! ...Immune from what?" She had only just recovered from her overwhelming sense of violation when she yelped and scurried to catch up to him. She wasn't one to ignore doctor's orders and her curiosity about what had just happened certainly didn't help.

"Fallpox." He didn't bother slowing down or even looking at her as they hurried through the town.

"Fallpox? I've never heard of that. Is it anything like the cutie pox?"

"Sort of. But instead of getting a bunch of amazing talents, you die."

"Oh my." Fluttershy gasped and thought of the sick colt she had just seen a day ago, realizing that he must have had fallpox. She hoped he wouldn't die.

"Hurry up. You're lagging behind a cripple. Please tell me you're better at other things than you are at walking." Nevermore shot a glance backwards as his prosthetic clacked on the wooden planks of the boardwalk below them.

"Other things? Where are we going?" Apprehension crept to her voice.

"I'm hiring you on as a nurse. Congratulations. I can't pay you much, but I'm sure you understand. Just think of the greater good and harmony and friendship or whatever. You Ponyville types are into that collectivist crap, right?" His pace slowed as they stepped back into the mud of the thoroughfare, giving Fluttershy a chance to catch up to the stallion again.

"Nurse?!" she squeaked. "Oh no. I'm not qualified to be a nurse. My only medical experience is with animals!"

"Ponies aren't animals?" He stopped to quirk an eyebrow at her before continuing back towards Dead Mare's Alley. "Even better. It's not hard. Just try not to let anyone die."

Fluttershy gulped. "Surely there has to be somepony else..."

"You're immune to fallpox, you aren't typical vile Appleloosan scum, you have some medical experience that I didn't even know about, and my wife gave you and your gal pals the ‘Atlantis Seal of Approval.’ Good enough in my book."

"She did? We only spoke for a few minutes..." Fluttershy was grasping at straws to pull out any excuse she could muster.

"She can tell you're trustworthy and competent just by looking at you." He turned to face her with wide, dramatic eyes. Waving his hooves around ridiculously as if he were a magician casting a spell. "OoooOOooOo!" The unicorn's face immediately returned to its typical cold scowl and the pair finished their trek down the alley, finally arriving at the doctor's meager office.

Nevermore suddenly stopped dead in his tracks, casting out a foreleg to block Fluttershy from getting closer to the cabin. It took the pegasus a moment to realize that the door to the office was ajar and when she pricked up her ears to listen closely, she could hear somepony moving around inside. In a halting motion, he silently ordered her to stay where she was as he snuck up to the door. With a burst of magic glow from the unicorn’s horn, the door swung open and Nevermore rushed inside.

"'Ello, Doc!" Gladius' grinning face met the him as the enormous burgundy stallion towered over the bony doctor in the middle of the room.

"What the hell are you doing in my office, Gladius?! Get out!" He shoved past the earth pony and went to the adjoining tent which was now filled with a slew of sleeping patients. He feverishly began checking on each of them. "What did you do?!"

"Aw, nothing to fuss over, Doc. Black's stomach just started acting up again. You weren't home so I was looking for the medicine you give usually give him. I was gonna pay you, honest!" The earth pony beamed at the doctor who finished his hasty examinations and stormed back over to him.

"Well the next time your boss' 'stomach starts acting up,' you tell him to wait until I'm available to make a house call instead of sending one of his thugs to snoop around my place," Nevermore spat out as he angrily ushered the larger stallion out the door.

"Come on, Doc! Thug?! You're hurting my feelings!"

"Or would you prefer goon? Now leave!"

"I think I like thug better, honestly... But as you wish, Doc. You should learn to lighten up a bit. I heard meditation works great." Gladius casually strolled past the doctor and tipped his head to Fluttershy as he passed her. "Morning, love." As he left the pair, he wore an inexplicably smug expression, as if he was somehow satisfied with his seemingly failed medicine run.

"Is that bad?" Fluttershy asked nervously as she watched him go.

"Probably, but we don't have time to be worrying about that right now." Nevermore shambled over to his supply cabinet and began a quick inventory. "Well it looks like he didn't take anything."

"Umm. I'm still not exactly sure... what is going on... at all." She helplessly looked to the doctor in whom she was trusting far more than she thought she should. Regardless, turning a blind eye while ponies got sick and died was unthinkable.

"It looks like there's been a fallpox outbreak. It's a contagious disease that only crops up - surprise, surprise - in the autumn. Normally an illness like this wouldn't be a huge deal. However, the ingredients for the cure and antidote are incredibly rare and will cost a fortune to mass produce, which we'll need, considering the filthy, crowded conditions of our beloved town. We could have quite the epidemic on our hooves. Therefore, we'll most likely be at way beyond maximum capacity soon, so I'll need your help tending to the sick, changing their bandages, giving them water, keeping them as comfortable as possible. Does that sum up everything nicely for you, Butter Pie?"

"Oh. Yes. That was very helpful. Thank you, Doctor... But, um, Butter Pie?"

"Yeah, I forgot your name so I took a guess. No dice?"

"It's Fluttershy."

"Eh, I like 'Butter Pie' better. You look more like a 'Butter Pie' to me." He wearily slumped over the alchemy table and removed his wooden leg. The unicorn winced and rubbed his stump tenderly before taking a swig from an unlabeled bottle out of his medicine chest. Fluttershy shifted her weight awkwardly and looked away, trying not to wonder what was held within the murky glass and all the implications that came with it.

"This is going to be bad, isn't it?"

"Yep. Just don't tell anyone. We don't want mass panic..." His eyes unfocused and he smirked. It was the first time Fluttershy had seen anything on his face resembling a smile. "Like I said, Butter Pie, you sure chose a hell of a time to come to Appleloosa.”