The Great Changeling Shipping Experiment

by Dusky Flower

Rating: teen
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Other, Romance, Changelings, Original Character, Comedy, Queen Chrysalis, Random, Main 6
Length: 7454

The MPVRD has come to Ponyville! It stands for Magic-Powered Virtual Reality Device!

The MPVRD has come to Ponyville! It stands for Magic-Powered Virtual Reality Device!

And Queen Chrysalis has a plan. A new game has come out. A game where everypony is shipped with everypony, and the pony with the most ponies dating them at "the end" wins. Everypony is playing, and everypony thinks most of the ponies are computer simulations. It's easy for a few changelings to get involved, right? Nopony will even notice!

Warning: I am a novice writer. Some of this may suck. Constructive criticism is appreciated.

Published 2012-12-09 00:40:01 UTC
Last updated 2013-03-31 01:54:06 UTC

Twilight Sparkle: Logging In

Twilight looked over the rules. She sighed. "I can't believe I let Spike talk me into this," she said. "Oh well. I better try it out, I suppose."

She levitated up the MPVRD goggles and tightened them over her eyes. She then levitated the game chip and inserted it into the slot on the left side of the thick goggles. Instantly, a silver bodysuit began to expand out from the goggles and cover her body, leaving only a hole over her nose and mouth to breathe through. The goggles vanished, showing her glowing white eyes.

Twilight Sparkle looked in the mirror.

"Huh. I wonder why my eyes are- whaa!" The white glow began to thread through the bodysuit, expanding and swirling, as if it was weaving a complex tapestry. Then, suddenly, it began to glow much, much brighter than before...

*RSHKLKISKSHILSHIE*

That, apparently, was the sound of a certain purple librarian crashing into the kitchen.

Twilight reached up a hoof, rubbing at a bump on her head.

"Owwww..."

She slowly rose to her hooves, trying to survey the damage.

It was... normal?

With all that clattering, something should have been broken. Twilight narrowed her eyes. Her keen mind would unravel this puzzle. String... by... string.

A slight smile curved the corners of her mouth upwards. This puzzle was going to be fun!

*****************************

Twilight trotted out of the kitchen, determined to check every room of the library. The bathroom where she had put on the goggles sounded like a good first place to start.

Upon entering the bathroom, she saw what appeared to be a luminescent portal hovering about five inches off the ground.

It was very purple.

WELCOME PLAYER NAME HERE

"Gah!" she shrieked. Her body, reacting to the surprise, flung her upwards, and she hit her head on the ceiling.

PLEASE INSERT YOUR HOOF INTO THE PORTAL

Twilight scrambled backwards, and considered the strange... talking glowing portal in her bathroom.

Her hoof found its way to her face.

This had not been a very good day.

And it wasn't over yet.

Rainbow Dash: Logging In

Rainbow Dash stretched her hooves up into the air, rising late as always.

"Aw, yeah. That was the most awesome dream, and this is the perfect time to be up."

A tortoise with a propeller attached to his shell rose up to eye level.

"Hey, Tank. What's up?"

He didn't reply, but instead dropped a pair of "rainbow-zig-zag" (as she had put it) goggles on her bed.

"Hey, thanks! You're the awesomest turtle a pegasus could have," she said, grinning, as she rubbed the top of his head.

Tank gave her a slow smile.

Rainbow Dash roughly shoved the rainbow goggles onto her face, and her eyes gleamed white as a bodysuit colored cyan a shade darker than her coat with a streamlined rainbow cone in the center spread over her body. Feeling the slick new fabric, she wandered over to a mirror to check herself out. Seeing herself in the mirror, a wide grin spread across her face.

"Whoa! I look like the awesomest pegasus in Equestria! I mean, not that I don't normally look like the awesomest pegasus in Equestria."

The rainbow cone started to glow white, and a rainbow whirlwind swirled around her.

*****************************

With a crack of lightning, Rainbow Dash appeared in a virtual cloud home just like hers. She flexed, and struck a cool pose.

A wide grin spread across her face.

"Aw yeah! This is so amazing!"

A rainbow portal appeared in front of her, and small sparks of lightning began to flicker inside it.

HELLO PLAYER NAME HERE PLEASE PLACE YOUR HOOF INSIDE THE PORTAL

Rainbow Dash raised one eyebrow, but stuck her hoof inside the portal anyway, just to prove how brave and awesome she was.

In fact, she not only stuck her hoof, but her entire upper body inside.

"hElLo RAinbouw Daaaash. Howwow are yooooooouuu doing tODay?

The portal fizzled, and it swirled into a blank rainbow pony.

"stAAte the COLOR you wouuuuld like mE to be.

Rainbow Dash feigned thoughtfulness for a moment, then exploded, "Blue! Definitely blue!"

The pony turned the same color as Rainbow's coat.

"Staaaate the *kzzt* maaaaaaiiiiiii-" It crackled, and then the link established when Rainbow had stuck her upper body inside the portal kicked in. It knew.

It knew how She wanted it to look.

It knew how She wanted it to talk.

It knew how She wanted it to think.

It knew exactly who it should be.

It would be the pony that Rainbow Dash would want it to be.

A rainbow mane and tail appeared, the exact same style as Rainbow Dash's.

Two cyan wings appeared.

Two eyes appeared, the exact same color as Rainbow's eyes.

A cutie mark appeared, and it was the only thing that showed that she was not identical.

It was a storm cloud with rainbow lightning bolts jutting out from odd angles.

The eyes fluttered open, and the portal said her first true words. They seemed too reverent, too awestruck for what they were.

"Hey, Rainbow Dash. What's up?"

Applejack: Logging In

Applejack could not figure out what to do with the goggles. She was wearing them, a red bodysuit had appeared, so now what?

"Why, ah bet this is just some silly prank. These goggles don't do nothing but put ya in some weird outfit thing, and make yer eyes glow."

As the universe had a sense of comedic timing, it took this moment to start logging Applejack into the virtual world.

*****************************

Apples. Apples and apple trees as far as the eye could see. Yep, she was definitely still in Sweet Apple Acres. But wasn't Big Mac out doing his chores just a moment ago? It all just didn't add up.

WELCOME PLAYER NAME HERE PLEASE PLACE YOUR HOOF INSIDE THE PORTAL

Applejack jumped backwards, unsettling her hat from where it rested atop her blond mane.

"Oh hay no!" she shouted, shoving the door open, and she began to gallop down the road.

The portal took this as an order, and turned into a hay-colored pony with no features. It looked like a yellow mannequin.

Looking over to where its quarry had gone, it galloped through the open door and down the road after her.

*****************************

Applejack looked back over her shoulder to where the straw-colored, pony-shaped portal was galloping after her.

"No way in tarnation are ya gonna get me, ya hay-portal thingy!" She tried to speed up, but the portal was faster. It leapt right over her, and landed in front of her, turning back into a portal.

Applejack, though she desperately tried, could not stop before she crashed right into the portal.

It swirled around for a moment, then turned into a straw-colored earth pony with a grass-colored mane, a hat much like Applejack's, and a cutie mark of a rope tied around an apple, one end of the string trailing off into a loop at the end.

"Why, howdy there! My name's Haystack, and Ah presume yer Applejack?"

Applejack's face changed from terrified to still-terrified-but-confused.

"Uh, yer right. Ah'm Applejack, mighty pleased ta meet ya and all, but do ya mind explainin' just what in the hay is going on?"

Haystack chuckled. "All in good time, sugarcube. All in good time."

Fluttershy: Logging In

Fluttershy looked at the goggles with faint fear. She had heard about these, and sometimes you went someplace with scary monsters!

She looked at Angel.

"A-are you sure I have to?" pleaded the pegasus.

Angel gave her an unimpressed look.

"W-well... okay. I'll try."

And with that, Fluttershy squeezed her eyes shut and reached out, fumbling for the light pink goggles.

She ended up tripping, and crashed into the table the goggles were resting on. She emitted a soft "eep" on impact.

Fluttershy took several seconds, then opened one eye just a tiny smidgen.

Angel looked even more unimpressed, then pointed very firmly to her flank. Fluttershy looked behind her. It seemed that the goggles had flipped upwards, soared over her head, and landed on her flank perfectly.

Angel gave her a flat stare.

"Okay... you sure?"

The rabbit rolled his eyes.

Fluttershy sighed, and very slowly put the pair of pink goggles on, squeezing her eyes shut as soon as she knew she had them. Upon reaching her face, she peeked through one eye for just a second, then quickly shoved the goggles onto her face.

She quickly curled into a ball as soon as the light pink bodysuit began to appear on her body, and shivered as the glowing tapestry began to weave itself over her.

As she began to fade into the virtual world, she firmly clamped her eyes and mouth shut, barely holding herself together.

Angel watched until the pink bodysuit became a shell-seeming capsule, protecting her physical body while she entered the virtual world.

*****************************

Fluttershy came in standing, knees trembling. A pink portal hovered lightly in front of her. Her blue eyes wandered to the portal, then squeezed shut once more.

PLEASE PLACE YOUR HOOF WITHIN THE PORTAL

Fluttershy squeaked, dropped to the ground, and covered her face with her hooves.

The pink portal hovered over to her, and extended a tendril of pink energy to lightly tap the terrified pegasus.

Fluttershy eeped, and buried herself farther into her hooves.

The portal seemed to sag a little, then turned until it was facing the floor, and lowered itself onto her.

Soon, a yellow pony with a short pink mane and tail formed in front of her.

"Hello," she whispered in a voice that would be soft at any volume. "My name is Butterfly."

Fluttershy peeked up a little, then whispered in a tiny, tiny voice, "I'm Fluttershy..."

Butterfly smiled and sat down next to Fluttershy, curling one hoof around her.

"Don't worry. It'll be okay. It'll be okay," Butterfly murmured as she gently stroked Fluttershy's mane. "It'll all be okay."

Rarity: Logging In

Rarity stood before the mirror, admiring the sleek silver and purple bodysuit. The silver curled around into a shimmering spiral, then wove out again, twisting and turning in a beautiful dance. Yes, Rarity definitely looked good.

Rarity smiled to herself, and took her favorite comb, pulling it through her mane. After all, she had to look her best for all the charming mares and stallions.

Why, she could just see it now...

*****************************

"Care to dance, my lady?" inquired the absolutely handsome, absolutely gorgeous stallion, his perfectly styled black mane almost shimmering.

"That would be a great honor, Duke Star Runner," replied Rarity.

"The true honor is meeting a perfect lady like you," murmured Duke Star Runner.

*****************************

Rarity sighed. Yes, this would be amazing. It would be splendid balls and silken gowns. It would be truly wonderful. It would be-

The silver on her bodysuit started to glow, first dimly, and then a luminescent white. The strange feeling of being pulled into another world clouded Rarity's mind- a very good thing, for otherwise it would be painful.

It was like that single second of weightlessness, that tiny moment of flight. And then she fell.

*****************************

Not every pony reacts well to being translated into the virtual world. Some experience happiness, some sadness. Some don't feel anything.

But some, some feel the translation, and instead of merely appearing in the virtual world, they fall into it.

Rarity, dimly, was aware that something was happening around her. It didn't really seem important, because, well, the fact that she was falling to her certain death seemed much, much more important. Absently, she began screaming.

...and what will happen to Sweetie Belle? Our parents are gone so often, what will she do? What will Fluttershy do? Who will run Carousel Boutique? When will this endless falling end?

Rarity had no time to answer any of these questions, as the voice ringing through her mind... was very insistent. What was it saying? She couldn't quite hear it...

PLAYER IN DANGER. INITIATING RESCUE.

Out of nowhere, a silver-blue portal appeared, and instead of the dreaded impact...

She hit the surface of the portal, and the world righted itself.

Once again, she stood on the floor of Carousel Boutique.

It was too much. Rarity was spent. Her adrenaline was gone.

Her eyes closed, and she landed on the floor.

A white crystal pony she had not seen, a unicorn, walked calmly over and placed the unconscious mare on the fainting couch.

Three words escaped her lips.

"Don't worry, Rarity."

The crystal unicorn smiled, and took some fabric from a drawer, placing it over Rarity's unconscious form.

"It will all be alright."

Pinkie Pie: Sailing Ships

"-and that's why your life is not complete without a party!" Pinkie grinned, convinced that her explanation would make Dreamer want to have one of her Patented Pinkie Pie Parties for sure.

Dreamer gave a nervous smile. "Um, okay? You parties sound... really... fun? So, uh... you're going to throw one? F-for me?"

Pinkie wrapped her hooves around her. "Of course, silly filly!"

Dreamer smiled. "That sounds nice."

Pinkie's grin became even wider.

"...But I'd rather go out to a restaurant with you or something."

Pinkie gasped. "Are you asking me out on a date?"

Dreamer bit her lip. "Er... yes?"

Pinkie gasped even harder. "Even though we just met today?"

A nervous expression became even more apparent on Dreamer's face. "...m-maybe?"

Pinkie jumped up and hugged her really tight. "Of course! That sounds really fun!"

Dreamer let out a breath, relieved that she had not failed to find somepony so early..

Whew.

*****************************

Dreamer had showed up at Sugarcube Corner at exactly 6:30. She wore a tight-fitting dark silver-blue dress that looked very much like it had been made by Rarity. (It had, as it was one of her designs that had become popular in Canterlot.)

Just the right amount of nervousness...

The door opened, and there was Pinkie Pie.

"Er, hi?" Dreamer asked, one hoof fidgeting with the neckline of her dress.

"Hi, Dreamer! Ready to go?"

Dreamer grinned. Suddenly her cheeks felt hot, as if she were blushing. "Yeah!"

Too eager, she mentally berated herself.

Dreamer toned down her smile. "Er, yeah."

I'm an idiot. She'll see right through me.

Pinkie wrapped her hooves around Dreamer.

"Then let's go!"

*****************************

The restaurant Pinkie had chosen was a rather famous chain called Lady Daffodil's Daffodils. A giant gold-painted archway adorned with similarly-painted daffodils stood before them. Lady Daffodil's Daffodils had gotten many great reviews, and with Ponyville's reputation for good food, it was no surprise one of their restaurants had opened there.

The fanciness of the place was not lost on Dreamer, who despite being dressed up like one, was not a pony used to going to a place like that. Pinkie Pie gave her hoof a reassuring squeeze.

"Don't worry about it," she whispered. "I know how to act fancy!"

And with that, they stepped through the restaurant's doors.

*****************************

The inside of the restaurant was incredible. Despite the cheesy name, it was nothing to snicker at. There were golden daffodils painted on the walls, and even the chandeliers were upside-down daffodils. The benches had beautiful wooden daffodils on their sides, and the tablecloths were clean, crisp, white sheets. Each table had a centerpiece of a wooden daffodil on a wooden plate.

The greeter was a yellow earth pony mare with an intricately styled darker yellow mane.

She gave them a superior gaze.

"And what can I do for you?" she asked, a haughty tone corrupting her voice.

Pinkie winked at Dreamer.

"Just leave this to me."

Pinkie brought her head up high.

"Madame, we seek a table for two."

The greeter rolled her eyes, but brought them to a (daffodil-patterned) booth.

"Here are your menus." She set them down and strode back to the desk where she "greeted" the guests.

Pinkie grinned. "See? I told you I could act all fancy and haughty and silly and stuff!"

Pinkie stuck her nose in the air. "Why madame, your daisies are the finest I've ever tasted. And your cider, so- bwahahaha! I just can't keep a straight f-a-a-ace!"

Dreamer joined in on the laughter. Something about this mare just made it so easy to laugh. So easy to... well, be at ease.

Yes, this was going to work out well.

*****************************

They had placed their orders, and the food had arrived. Dreamer had the rose petals and greens, and Pinkie had their famous daffodils in soy sauce.

"M-mh-mmh-mh!" Pinkie swallowed. "This is good!"

Dreamer cautiously levitated her fork up and stabbed the rose petal. She stared at it for a minute, sniffed it suspiciously, and took a tiny nibble.

Her face lit up.

"This is great!"

Pinkie giggled. "Well, of course it's great! I wouldn't have taken you here otherwise!"

Dreamer laughed too, not sure if she was playing along or not.

She scooped another bite into her mouth. Suddenly,

"Open wide!"

Dreamer opened her mouth reflexively, not quite sure what was happening. Instantly, a wonderful taste assaulted her mouth.

"Mrm!"

Pinkie giggled. "Now it's your turn!"

Dreamer gulped the wonderful food down. "What?"

"To feed me a little bit of your dinner, silly!"

Dreamer bit her lip. "Well... okay..."

Cautiously, she picked up the fork in her mouth, stabbed a bit of rose petal, and slowly, ever so slowly, brought it toward the pink earth pony's mouth.

"What are you waiting for, silly?"

Quickly, too quickly, Dreamer shoved the fork forwards, too far into Pinkie's mouth, and their lips met.

Dreamer didn't know quite what to think about this turn of events.

Pinkie, however, seemed quite pleased, jumping into the kiss with gusto, but eventually pulling away, the food sliding off the fork with her.

She swallowed the rose petals. "Mmm!"

Dreamer just looked at her.

She still had no clue what to think.

But she was pretty sure that things were going to turn out alright.

*****************************

Outside the restaurant, Dreamer lay her head on Pinkie's shoulder as they walked, a full moon shining above. Nothing had ever been like this before. It was all already there, before. Now she didn't know what to think. It was all just so... strange. Did this pink party pony really like her?

"Hey." Pinkie looked at her.

"Hm?"

"Why are you thinking so much, silly filly?"

"...I don't know."

"It's not thinky time right now. This isn't a library or school or other thinky place. This is a date."

Dreamer wasn't sure what to say to that.

And then, like the dreams she was named for, two pink hooves wrapped around her, and a pair of pink lips planted themselves firmly on hers.

And like a tiny stream of the heart, Dreamer felt just a tiny bit of love curl around her, and then inside.

And ever so gently, she began to kiss Pinkie back.

Discord: Logging In/Twilight Sparkle: Sailing Ships

Celestia had a plan. After all, if Discord wasn't in the real world, he couldn't cause trouble. And with the special ward on the goggles, he would not be able to re-enter the real world. He would be trapped in his own paradise, where he could wreak as much chaos as he wanted.

Or at least, he would, if Changeling Spy #51 hadn't snuck in and replaced the chip in the goggles. And there was no question about what chip it was.

The chip was very innocuous. It was unmarked, and came in a box labeled "All Equestria Dating Sim," which was only slightly suspicious. It was just another little black chip, the kind that comes in the boxes of games that ponies really didn't want anypony else to know they were playing. 51 was good at her job, and was in and out in a flash. She even took the liberty of replacing the one in Celestia's set of goggles with another "All Equestria Dating Sim" chip.

Heh. What a scandal it would be if it got out what the Princess was playing...

51 flicked the "Very Neon Nightmare Night Crazy Banana" chip back behind her, and continued on towards the statue gardens. She slipped her own green goggles on, and grinned to herself. After all, who knew what chaos would unfold?

Heh. Discord in a dating sim. I wouldn't miss this for the world.

*****************************

Twilight Sparkle was busy re-reading the rulebook for the tenth time, when suddenly a very familiar pink cloud zoomed in and started raining chocolate milk all over the library.

Her first reaction was to stare blankly at the cloud. It did not fit the rules of reality, even virtual reality, so what was it doing here?

Her second reaction was OhmyfreakingCelestiait'sDiscord

Her third reaction was Wait, if it was Discord I would have been logged out by now.

Twilight cocked her head, still staring blankly as a million and one thoughts raced through her mind.

Then, Discord's head came through the suddenly open window, followed by his body, and not by his legs and tail.

After going halfway through the window, he snapped his fingers, and the rest of his body appeared.

"Well well, if it isn't Twilight. I think this will be quite entertaining."

With another finger snap, a tuxedo (complete with top hat) appeared on Discord's body, and he conjured up a mirror.

Striking a dramatic pose, he commented, "Well, if I don't look just ravishing."

Twilight's head snapped up, as she finally broke out of her stupor.

"Discord! What are you doing here?"

Discord smiled. "Why, just paying a visit to an old friend."

Twilight scowled. "I don't know what you're playing at, Discord, but- Mmmph!"

Discord had shoved a pie into her mouth.

"Now, Twilight, would you do me the honor of accompanying me on a date tonight?"

"MMMPH?"

He smiled. "Wonderful. See you at ten."

He then snapped his fingers and disappeared.

Twilight spat out bits of pie.

"What."

*****************************

Discord changed his mane style one more time, just for the fun of it, before snapping it back to the original style.

"Why, I just keep looking better and better."

He conjured a bouquet of roses, before knocking on Twilight's door.

A purple aura surrounded it, and the library door swung open.

Twilight glared at him. "Discord."

"Ready to go, my lady?"

Twilight rolled her eyes. "...Fine. But only because I want to know why you're being so nice."

Discord draped one arm over her shoulders. "Why, my fair lady, I am insulted you would imply that I am not normally nice."

Twilight gave him a flat stare. "Quit the act and cut to the chase, Discord."

And down the road they went, arguing all the way.

*****************************

"-And so, my fair lady, I have graciously decided to allow you to win this argument."

"Good! Now will you please just tell me what in the hay is going on?"

Discord swept a bow. "Why, my fair lady, I have had a change of heart! I have come to sweep you off your hooves, and-"

Twilight looked at him.

Discord sighed. "You aren't believing a word of this, are you."

Twilight just kept giving him that look. "Nope."

"Ah, well. I'll charm you to me eventually."

Twilight rolled her eyes. When pigs fly.

*****************************

Discord had brought her to the movie theater, which was showing The Sunset of a Canterlot Heart, which was another one of those romances.

Discord got them two medium popcorns from the popcorn vendor.

"That will be ten bits, sir."

Twilight glared at him, but didn't say anything as Discord paid.

"Here, my fair lady," said Discord as he handed her the popcorn.

She caught it in her magic aura.

"...Thank you."

Discord swept another bow to her, ignoring the sarcasm in her voice. "Anytime, my fair lady."

Twilight didn't notice, but throughout the movie, Discord edged closer and closer to her seat. As Sunset Harmony finally kissed Heart's Flight, Discord leaned closer and closer to her.

"I love you, Sunset Harmony," said Heart's Flight on the screen.

"I love you... my heart's flight."

And then, ever so gently, Discord kissed Twilight.

*****************************

Roughly, she shoved him away.

"What were you thinking? Assuming you can, anyway! What possible thing could I have done to make you think I am at all interested-"

Twilight saw the seemingly, maybe even sincerely, sorrowful Discord.

Twilight blinked, and then, not knowing what was coming over her, kissed him back.

*****************************

OhmygoshwhatwasIthinkingI'mkissingDiscord! Why am I kissing Discord? This makes no sense!

Discord gave her a smile. Literally. He plucked a smile from thin air, and handed it to her.

"Until next time," he said, before vanishing into a puff of golden smoke.

Twilight just stood there, holding the smile in her hoof, not knowing what to think.

He used mind control magic on me. Yes, that has to be it. It just has to be.

Twilight caught the smile in her magic, standing firmly for a second, then slumped back into her seat.

Then why am I blushing?

Fluttershy: Running From the Shipyard

In a cottage at the edge of Ponyville, a yellow pegasus and a white rabbit were staring at a book.

"I-I have to... date somepony?"

Angel glared at Fluttershy, tapping his paw on the page.

"I-I have to date everypony?" she squeaked.

Angel grinned, nodding.

What Fluttershy then said was so inaudible, so high-pitched, that it could only be translated as "eep."

Angel flashed his paws furiously at the mare, glaring at her in between gestures.

Fluttershy slowly peeked open one eye, looked at the gestures, and then shut it again, one wing twitching in utter fright.

"You... invited ponies to a party here?"

Angel nodded, and stepped over to bar the doorway.

A streak of yellow and pink was all that he saw before he heard the window clatter.

Fluttershy streaked along the path at a speed that was halfway passable, noting the sheer numbers of the ponies coming down it.

There were buff stallions and smooth Romareos, pretty pegasi, gorgeous high fashion mares and a few down-to-earth Apples. How had Angel invited all these ponies? Fluttershy's teeth began to clatter against each other, and then began to grind. There were too many ponies. Way too many ponies.

Fluttershy darted forwards again, whirling her wings like she was caught in a tornado, or perhaps trying to make one. She glanced franticly behind her, head darting back and forth. The world blurred around her, and she couldn't quite keep an eye on where she was going.

*WHOMP*

"Oh no, I'm so sorry! Let me help you up," said an earth pony mare. Her orange mane curled cutely around her shoulders, and her pale yellow coat shone in the sun. Three carrots adorned her flank. She reached a hoof down to help the dazed pegasus mare up.

"I-I'm really sorry about that, I wasn't looking where I was going. I-I'm really sorry! Please don't be mad at me..."

The earth pony mare grinned. "How could I be mad at such a pretty mare? Come on, let me buy you something at Sugarcube Corner to make it up to you."

"It was my fault, really... you don't have to do that..." Fluttershy murmured, blushing slightly.

"I'm fine, really! My name is Golden Harvest, by the way. What's yours?"

"I'm Fluttershy..."

Golden Harvest sighed inwardly. Would this mare hide and squeak and stutter the whole date? If everypony in this dating sim was so shy, she'd be giving that company a bad review, that was for sure. Still, either they'd decided to include the Elements or the Elements had joined multiplayer, and she did need the dating practice...

"Soooo... you're the vet, right?"

Fluttershy popped her head up above the table, her former bubble of shyness seemingly popped.

"Oh, I'm not technically a vet, I never could deal with the big schools, but I do enjoy taking care of animals! It's just that I mostly take care of the wild ones..." Fluttershy trailed off, looking away uncomfortably.

Golden Harvest tapped her hooves together. "You... like animals, then?" She almost facehoofed at the sheer stupidity of her question.

"Oh, yes, very much!" The yellow pegasus didn't seem to mind the comment's awkwardness, but shrank down the moment after she responded."

"Hehe, sorry for being such a boring date. A mare like you doesn't deserve all these uncomfortable silences, and since I was treating you..."

"Oh, no! You're not boring at all! I'm sorry for being so quiet... date?" As the word snapped into focus in Fluttershy's mind, her pupils seemed to shrink. "D-date?"

"Er... sorry? I- I thought you knew it was a date..." Argh! Now she'd think she was being blamed! "I- I should have been more obvious, what kind of ice cream do you want?" This time Golden Harvest couldn't hold back the facehoof, no matter how hard she tried. Why must she be plagued with horrible dating skill?

Fluttershy blushed and turned her eyes towards the ground, avoiding the gaze of her... date. She flicked her eyes upwards just slightly, and let out a squeak as goldenrod-colored hooves gently wrapped her into a hug.

The yellow mare tensed in Golden Harvest's hooves and jerked backwards, shivering slightly.

"Hello?"

Golden Harvest knelt down beside the trembling mare, resisting the urge to put a hoof on her shoulder. I've traumatized her enough today, she thought bitterly, resisting the urge to cry at ruining yet another date. She was charming, sweet, kind... why did it always go wrong?

"Excuse me," said Mrs. Cake. "Are you ready to give me your orders?"

Golden Harvest couldn't keep the misery out of her face anymore. The dam behind her eyes broke, and out poured a torrent of tears.

Mrs. Cake sighed. "Oh, honey, don't worry. How about I get you two a little hot chocolate? On the house, of course."

Golden Harvest looked at Fluttershy. "I... I'm sorry. I should have been more thoughtful about what you would be comfortable with. You're a really nice mare, and I ruined this. Not you. Don't blame yourself. I understand if you don't want to be my marefriend or even my friend, and... I'm sorry."

Fluttershy made a slight squeaky noise and looked up at Golden Harvest. "Um... it's okay. You seem like a really nice pony too... and I don't think that it would be nice for me to just walk out now," Fluttershy murmured, before awkwardly patting Golden Harvest's shoulder.

Golden Harvest, to her credit, did not hug Fluttershy, but instead wrapped one of her hooves around one of Fluttershy's.

Fluttershy blushed, and smiled a little bit. "Um... I think our hot chocolate is ready."

Golden Harvest smiled warmly back. "I think that would be perfect. Let's turn this day around."

Fluttershy didn't really know what to say back, so she just grinned awkwardly and moved a little closer to her new friend.

The hot chocolate tasted delicious.

Chrysalis: Logging In

Chrysalis, contrary to popular belief, was not hiding out in some dank cave, nor infiltrating Canterlot in another foolish attempt to gain power. She was greedy and occasionally power-drunk, not stupid. They sometimes amounted to the same thing, but if ponies had also learned to harness the power of love she wasn't going to go try to take them over again.

No, Chrysalis was not in a cave, sewer, back alley, brothel, or whatever all those paranoid ponies were constantly insisting. She was in a comfortably middle-class apartment reserved in the name Crystalline Chroma, who happened to be the CEO of Crystal Chaos Studios. Her right-hand mare was a mare named Screwball, who used to be called a Discord worshipper. Whatever she was, half-changeling or half-dragon or full-blooded crazy mare, she was excellent at adding the randomity necessary for a game to keep its audience. And, yes, they had created two real games. They were both excellent profit and a source of fans, which while did not give a huge amount of love gave enough to keep her alive. But Chrysalis was not reformed, not by any means. And if she could gain more power and achieve her goals, why, that would just be an added bonus.

The changeling queen flipped her mane out of her eyes, and pushed on a pair of white-and-green goggles. With a swirl, a white bodysuit patterned with emeralds of varying shades of green fitted itself onto her pony form,

The unicorn mare seemed quite ordinary, if attractive, with a white coat and a shimmery clean purple mane. Her cutie mark was a prism with light coming in on one end and a rainbow shining out on the other.

Not bad, "Crystalline" thought. Now I just need a plausible excuse to be in my own game...

"Wow! It's Crystalline! She must have put herself in as a bonus! Or maybe she's actually here! Squee!" A mare, probably teen-aged, had decided to squee over Chrysalis.

Oh, just leave me alone. You're nothing but a pathetic little pony fanfilly, she growled inwardly. Outwardly, she said, "Well, I do need to check up on these things, sweetheart." Ugh. Just pretending to like them... she keeps me alive, she keeps me alive...

"Ms. Chroma, can I have an autograph? I loved Fall of the Crystal Empire! And Knights of Chaos was really awesome too!"

Oh, she can talk without squeeing. Trying desperately to keep the venom out of her voice, she replied, "Alright. Here you go." An autograph signed "To my biggest fan. -Crystalline," appeared out of thin air. She had used the same signature she always did- it's not like they really were special.

"Squeeeeeeee!"

Ugh.

I wish they'd stay away from me... maybe I should reconsider this plan. Or at least have a viable plan B this time.

With a sigh, the disguised changeling queen trotted over to a park bench to meet her AI assistant, who was also her portal to the outside world.

Of course her portal, Data Web, was already set up and ready to go.

"Hello, Mistress!" chirped a cheery voice from a green mare with a darker emerald green mane.

"Ah, Data Web. Ready to venture the wide, wide world of VRquestria?" She cringed inwardly, wondering how she'd manage to keep the facade up for the week or two she planned on being in the virtual Ponyville.

"Always ready, Mistress!"

Together they seemed an eccentric developer/CEO and a joking assistant. How easily appearances can deceive... How do all those ponies deal with not being changelings?

Rainbow Dash: Paperwork Blues Part One

"Ugh, this is lame. I thought this 'VRquestria' stuff would have, action, or adventure, or something other than boring, normal, everyday life. I mean, I'm not even a Wonderbolt! What gives, Crystal Chaos? I mean, with a name like that-"

With all of her complaining, Rainbow Dash failed to notice that the cloud she had flopped herself down upon was right over the doorway into Ponyville City Hall, and when she remembered it was supposed to rain today, well, she also didn't notice all of the paperwork for the last month, or the beige earth pony carrying it.

Mayor Average Mare stepped out of the doorway, grunting slightly under the weight of the paperwork she was carrying, and was subsequently drenched.

Wait, I thought I told Rainbow Dash that the rain for today was called off, based on the fact that all the various paperwork is being delivered today. Wait, the paperwork!

Mayor Mare quickly darted her head back to where she had been balancing the paperwork, and almost screamed in horror when she saw that the water was quickly seeping into the towering pile.

"AIEEEEEE!"

Okay, maybe not almost.

Ponyfeathers! I totally forgot the rain had been called off! And that was all of last month's paperwork! For the entire town, which includes the weather service! And now it's all ruined!

A look of horror slowly crossed Rainbow's face.

Including... my paycheck. No paperwork, no bits. No bits, no new, radically awesome, super cool, amazing Wonderbolts Official Training Gear!

Her eyes narrowed with steely resolve.

I have to fix this.

Ever so slowly, a plan formed in the cyan pegasus's mind.

"Alright. Twilight, since she's just settled back into Ponyville after her Princessifying, has been getting the copies of the paperwork. Derpy's got the note, and while she's occasionally late, she always gets it there eventually. Now all I have to do is make up the extra hassle to Mayor Mare."

"Rainbow? Sorry to interrupt your monologue, but I only have Mayor Mare's paperwork. I don't have the paperwork for Cloudsdale Weather, the AIs, the random ponies that used to be portals, the damages caused by the self-regenerating cake pony, or the paperwork for the three drunk changelings that wandered in the day before we got our goggles, or-"

Twilight's list of paperworks she didn't have was interrupted by a blue hoof.

"Yeah, I get it, you're missing a ton of paperwork. Stick a hoof in it."

Twilight pulled her mouth away from Rainbow Dash's hoof with a loud pop. "You already did."

Dash facehoofed. "Eurgh, I know that, that's why I said it!"

"Also, it's called a Coronation. Not a 'Princessifying' or whatever you called it."

"Same difference. Anyway, you got any idea as to how to fix this?"

"Well, you could just go apologize to her..."

Mayor Mare sighed. Paperwork, paperwork, and more paperwork. With extra added paperwork. It was even on her cutie mark, which she had gotten by fixing a teacher's end-of-the year paperwork and preventing her from being fired. No, there was no escaping the paperwork, no matter what she tried.

Ordinary Mare, Celestia's second-greatest spy, flattened herself against the green, goopy floor.

"I know you're in there," hissed a raspy voice. "Why don't you come out and play?"

"I'll stay here, thanks," the spy cooly retorted. After all, an abandoned cocoon wasn't the worst place to hide from a Changeling-

The beige earth pony was roused from her memory of her mother's tales of spydom by a loud knock at a door.

Somepony else with more paperwork, like as not. If only I'd disguised myself as Pencil Lead instead to plead her case, instead of just fixing her paperwork, maybe I would have been a spy, like my mother wanted. At least spies get their paperwork done by somepony else, though like as not I'd be the one doing it for all of them. Or get assigned to steal paperwork, or destroy it, or something.

No, Average Mare knew that the paperwork would always haunt her, no matter what.

The knocking came again, more insistently this time.

Mayor Mare sighed, and plodded slowly over to the door, taking care to avoid the various piles of paperwork, bills, and other miscellaneous pieces of paper lying about. Pulling the door open, she fixed the pony standing there with a hopefully neutral and not Oh-My-Celestia-ALL-THE-PAPERWORK expression. "Yes?" she asked the cyan pegasus standing there.

"I... I'm sorry I ruined all of your paperwork. Twi's got Ponyville's, at least, so at least that's something, right?" Dash fixed her with a nervous grin.

Mayor Mare's eyes narrowed. "Well, it is something, but it's a lot less than I would have had done if somepony hadn't activated a raincloud right above it."

Dash looked down, fidgeting with her hooves. "I... yeah. I guess I just... forgot the rain was cancelled."

"You... forgot."

"Er... yup?"

"You forgot that the rain had been cancelled on Paperwork Day."

"Yeah, and I'm really sorry! Mistakes happen, right?"

"Mistakes."

Mayor Mare fought the urge to facehoof.

"Well, it was!" Rainbow Dash protested. "I'd never drop a rainstorm on all your paperwork on purpose, you know!"

"An entire month's paperwork quite literally down the drain, and-" Mayor Mare stopped.

For once, I have an excuse for the paperwork being late. Maybe, just maybe, I can take a day off for once and let Fine Print handle the paperwork.

She turned her attention back to the cyan mare looking at her with a sheepish grin.

"Well, I suppose mistakes do happen, and I'm sure that your boss is going to give you enough rotten hay about this without me adding more to the pile, and it is almost lunchtime, so shall we discuss how you're going to fix this over dandelion sandwiches?"

Rainbow Dash gave her a determined nod. "I'll do anything I can to fix this mess." Even if it does mean I have to do paperwork.

Author's Note

Oh, hey! I just noticed this author's notes box! *is a total n00b*

Anyways... yeah. DashxMayor Mare. Requested shipping, and so totally bizarre I had to do it.

So tell my if you think I did well, or just totally failed and made everything weird and too too-much-paperworky!

Also, I totally intended Dash to just take Mayor Mare out to dinner to make it up to her, but Twilight informed me that she did not, in fact, have all the paperwork. And Mayor Mare informed me that she was not willing to forgive the hassle just yet.

So... yeah.

Prologue: The Rules of the Game

Warning: This is a multiplayer game, and there are many highly advanced personalities among the computer-generated ponies in here. Good luck.

-MPVRD Game Reviews, A Button.

Rule One: Everypony has relationships with everypony. While not strictly a rule, the one with the most relationships at the end of the game wins.

Rule Two: You will not directly sabotage another pony's efforts. Of course, there are plenty of indirect ways...

Rule Three: There are many ponies here that do not actually exist. They are still part of the game.

Rule Four: You are not allowed to say if you are a player.

Rule Five: Foals are off limits to adults, and vice versa.

Rule Six: Married ponies are referees, and it is against the rules to have a relationship with them. If you don't get caught, however, it still counts at the end of the game.

Rule Seven: If everypony you are dating breaks up with you, you lose. You have one week to enter your first relationship.

No harm will come to you while you are inside the game. You will gain sustenance whenever you eat within the game, and your energy is restored whenever you sleep. You may exit the game at any time, simply by willing yourself to. Anything that happens outside the game will also happen inside it, so if a new pony enters, or an Ursa Major attacks, they will appear within the game, and anypony affected will be transported out.

Good luck.

-Crystal Chaos Studios owns this game. All standard copyright rules apply.

Pinkie Pie: Logging In

Pinkie Pie had already deciphered the strange goggle instructions, and was wearing a pink-and-blue bodysuit. Her eyes glowed, and she began to fade into the virtual world.

For a brief moment, she raised her legs up, and pretended she was on a roller coaster.

Pinkie giggled, and she shouted one last thing as she faded into virtual reality.

"Wheeeeee..."

*****************************

She appeared in Sugarcube Corner, and a pink portal was hovering serenely, as if waiting for her.

WELCOME PLAYER-

Pinkie Pie bent her knees for a brief second, then launched herself headfirst into the portal.

The portal began rapidly flickering, and then it turned into a pony made of cake.

The cake-pony grinned at Pinkie Pie, and unfurled its wings. It then began to fly around the room in circles.

"Hi! Hi! Hi!" it said.

Pinkie grinned. "Hi! I'm Pinkie Pie! What's your name?"

"I know who you are, silly filly! I'm Cakeamina! You can call me Cakey!"

Pinkie wrapped one of her hooves around Cakey's midsection, and pulled her out the door.

*****************************

Pinkie and Cakey were having a wonderful time bouncing around in the park. Pinkie was currently going through all her jokes, which Cakey found hilarious... even the terrible ones.

"And then I said, to get to the other side!"

"Hahahahaha!"

Pinkie's head spun around, and her eyes locked onto a new pony.

"Hi what's your name I'm Pinkie Pie do you like parties?"

The light blue unicorn mare seemed rather overwhelmed, and she took a moment to pull her dark blue mane back into order.

"Er, I'm Dreamer. I... I've never been to a party."

Pinkie gasped and propelled herself into the air.

"You've never been to a party? Like, never never? This is terrible! Come on Dreamer! We've got to get you an emergency party! Stat!"

And with that, she began dragging the helpless mare towards Sugarcube Corner.