The Angels Sang a Whiskey Lullaby
A grin that could rival Pinkie Pie was plastered across Applejack's face as she cantered toward her house. The war was coming to a close, and she had finally, after many years of servitude, been sent home. Home...to her Dashie! The farm pony could barely contain the yells of joy that threatened to burst from her throat as she pushed the door open, looking around.
"Rainbow Dash...?" she called quietly, unsure if the other was sleeping. No one had told the Pegasus that her lover would be coming home, so Applejack planned to surprise her. She trotted quietly inside, gently pushing the door closed behind her, and began to make her way to the kitchen. She'd bring some apple pie with her, to make it all the more special.
Staring around the kitchen, Applejack let out a soft sigh. She was finally home. Memories flooded back, all the good times she had spent here. Before the war. Before...Shaking her head, the farmpony pushed the thought away and set to making her pie.
Applejack quietly headed upstairs, a pie tray held in her mouth.It was hard to walk silently when she was this exited, but she did her best. She heard a soft noise, coming from her and Rainbow's bedroom. Smiling, she headed over to the door.
"I'm home, Dashie..." she whispered quietly, before pushing the door open.
"How could you!!!!"
The high-pitched screech, obviously coming from someone on the brink of tears, was followed by the loud clang of a pie tray hitting the ground. The noise broke Rainbow Dash out of her concentration on Spitfire, who was currently nuzzling her neck and massaging her chest. She knew that accent anywhere.
The two Pegasi looked up to see a very distraught orange earth pony standing in the doorway. Her eyes, with pupils much smaller than they should be, were filling up with tears. A camo jacket and army boots were the only things she wore, aside from the gun in a holster which was attached to a strap that wrapped around her chest, under one fore-leg, and over the other shoulder.
"A-Applejack! I can explain!!" Rainbow Dash exclaimed, pushing Spitfire off of her and jumping up. But she was too late. Applejack turned and ran, slamming into the walls and breaking two vases as she went. Hoofbeats pounded loudly on the wooden floor, soon joined by a second set as Rainbow chased after the distraught earth pony.
"Applejack! Wait!" she yelled, slamming into the curio cabinet. Glass shattered, spraying over her, and cutting up her shoulder. She barely noticed, instead opting to keep running, completely forgetting about her wings in the her mad run to get to Applejack before she got too far away.
She hadn't noticed the pictures - thousands of good memories - that had spilled all over the floor when she broke the cabinet, several ripping under her hooves. Small red drips from her shoulder hit the ground as she ran for the stairwell, splattering with a small noise that couldn't even be heard over her hoofbeats.
She fell down the stairs, tumbling over and over again, feeling something in her shoulder crack as she hit the floor - but still she kept running. She only stopped when she reached the doorway, seeing an orange blot heading away at high-speed off of the farm.
"No..." She choked out. Her knees shook, her shoulders starting to involuntarily hunch as tears began to sting her eyes. "No...NonononoNOOOO!" she screeched, falling over and screaming repeatedly. "Come back!!! Don't leave meeeeee!!!" Her voice grew in volume and pitch, until it cracked, leaving her a crying mess on in the doorway.
Applejack ran. She needed to get far away, away from this place...She heard it, though. All those screams, following her. It was worse than the screams from the war, worse than any gunfire or stench of blood. Because this was Her Dashie. Her Dashie was screaming for her!
Part of her kept telling her to go back, that it was a misunderstanding, that she could forgive her. But the larger part of her told her to run - and oh, how she ran. Years of war had made the farmer even stronger than before, even faster. Her hoofbeats pounded so hard that her bones shook, but she didn't look back - not once.
Something which she would regret, for the rest of her days.
Spitfire, who had been laying on the floor until Rainbow started screaming, got up and ran down the stairs, only to see her one-time fling crumpled in the doorway. She shifted from hoof to hoof, unsure what to do. She's never seen the strong mare like this before. Actually, she'd never seen anypony get this bad before. She left silently through the window, leaving Rainbow Dash alone, to bask in her sadness and memories.
When Applejack finally stopped, she found herself in front of Ponyville's bar. Gasping, panting breaths escaped her mouth, her eyes squeezed shut in an attempt to stop the tears. She was, however, unable to quell the flow. Hardly able to breath, she sobbed her heart out, leaning against the wall and collapsing into the mud.
"Da...Dash....Rainbow Dash...." she sobbed out, body shaking with the effort to breath. She lay there for what felt like hours, but really could have only been thirty minutes or so. Eventually, she ran out of tears. And when she couldn't cry anymore, she stood up.
Numbly, she walked into the bar, passing many different ponies on her way to the counter. Many stared, but none said a thing. The bartender looked up as she slipped onto the bar stool, taking in her ragged appearance. She was obviously a soldier - the boots, cameo jacket, and gun told him that. Her eyes were red from crying,, which told him she was very upset. And she was covered with mud, which, paired with everything else, told him she was very upset.
"Give me a bottle of whiskey. The strongest you've got."
Applejack staggered across the empty street, the smell of whiskey in a cloud around her. She didn't even notice it, though, as she practically dragged herself back home. For the past three months, it had been all she'd done. Drink. Sob. Drink some more. Sob some more. Sleep. Drink some more. The same cycle repeated, until all she could smell was whiskey...But still, all she could think of was Rainbow Dash.
"Gosh darnit'..." she muttered, voice barely audible as she slammed her front door open, breaking it off its hinges. She was so drunk she didn't notice, and walked straight over it. The pouring rain filled her ears as she made her way to her the kitchen. She grabbed two more bottles of whiskey, draining both on the spot. She stopped, wavered for a moment, then barfed all over the floor. The only thing to come out was liquid. She'd been too upset to eat for days.
"Plehh." Spitting, Applejack shook her head. Instead of rinsing her mouth out, however, she went for another bottle of whiskey. By now her stomach was starting to hurt, but she paid it no mind, guzzling down another whole bottle before heading toward her bedroom. After what seemed like forever she made it up the stairs, fighting the urge to upchuck more whiskey, and pushed her way into her room. She didn't bother to shut the door, instead heading straight for her bedside table and drinking another whole bottle. She knew what she was doing - She didn't care.
"More..." she growled out, tears beginning to flow from her eyes. Despite her state of mind, clear thoughts still forced their way in - memories, mostly, all about Rainbow Dash. "More whiskey, damn it!" she yelled, though no one could hear her, and slammed her hoof on the ground. Pulling open the doors to the nightstand, she found her last five bottles. She grabbed one, drinking the whole thing, before heading on to another.
After she drank them all, she could feel her stomach burning. Hastily, she grabbed a small paper and wrote a short sentence. She smiled, tears in her eyes, before climbing into the bed. She buried her face in the pillow, leaving the note beside her. And there she stayed, until her last breath left her lungs. And with it, she whispered softly...
"I'll love her till I die..."
"Ah... Ahh.... Applejack.... Ahahh..." Rainbow Dash, alone now, couldn't hold in her tears as she hung on to the chest-height stone, pressing her face into it. "Applejack... Applejack, WHY!!!" she creamed out, slamming her head into the name she spoke. The gravestone was silent, allowing the distraught Pegasus to cry alone. And that she did, for hours on end, until her throat burned and her eyes wouldn't allow any more tears to flow.
Just as the pale light of dawn began to illuminate the now-dull rainbow of her mane, she stood up. With a last sniff, she looked around, taking in the beauty of this place for one last time. She could never come here again - that she knew. For if she did, she wouldn't be strong enough to stand up again. This...this was the place it had happened. The place the truth came out.
A willow tree, older than the town itself, stood in this clearing. Surrounding it was a small valley of grass and flowers, surrounded by trees. A beautiful place...
"Nearly as beautiful as the body it now holds..." Rainbow Dash whispered, her voice quiet and raspy, barely recognizable. She slowly walked off, without even the energy to fly. Somehow, she found that she didn't even want to.
Years passed. Rainbow continued to grow more and more distant, rarely ever flying, a mere shadow of her former self. She knew that this was her fault, and it ate her away inside. Every time she slept, she dreamed of what their life could have been, had she only not cheated on Applejack... And every morning, she woke up in tears.
There were rumors about her, how she spent every night cooped up in the bar, drinking and dancing with anyone who would dare come close. But everyone pretended not to know when she was around. All her friends tried to help her, but eventually gave up and move on. She wouldn't see the light anymore.
And now, it was just another night, and she was heading to the bar. She walked with her head low, ignoring everyone who she came across on her way. The rain pounded down hard, splashing mud up her legs as she trudged towards the bar.
Once inside, she threw all her bits on the counter, ordering a bottle of whiskey. "I want whiskey. Give me the strongest you've got." The bartender blinked, remembering such a scene from years ago, but said nothing, pulling out a bottle of whiskey and giving it to the mare. She took it, turning around and staring off into the crowd as she drank it straight from the bottle.
As she stared among the masses - the bar was quite full tonight - something caught her eye. A splash of orange. A hay-colored mane. A cameo jacket. Jumping up, she ran into the crowd. Pushing her way through the people, she dared to hope...
"Applejack!" she yelled, but it was just another noise in the loud bar, and no one heard her. The hallucination was gone. Feeling her eyes begin to burn with tears, Rainbow Dash threw down the bottle and ran off, pushing through the doors and out into the night.
Two months passed, since that first hallucination. They were happening more and more often - whenever she went to the bar, whenever she was in a crowd, whenever she saw an orange pony... Rainbow Dash couldn't take it anymore. It just had to stop.
And she knew exactly how to.
"Guess I'll just take a lesson from you, Applejack..." she muttered darkly, emptying out her savings case. “You always did love whiskey..." She collected the bits and headed out to the bar.
Like always, she walked with her head down - but she was different this time. Dark circles beneath her eyes told of countless sleepless nights, thin waist telling of days without eating. Everyone backed away from her on the streets, unsure of what to say. As always, she ignored them all.
Entering the bar, she headed straight for the counter. "Oh, you're here early, Rai..." the bartender spoke, stopping mid-sentence as Rainbow Dash poured a large amount of bits on the counter.
"Give me as much whiskey as this can buy me. Keep the change," she said darkly, never looking at his eyes. He nodded, dumbfounded, and pulled out several bottles of whiskey - more than anyone had ever purchased at one time before.
"Y-You must be stocking up, huh..." he said, quietly.
"Yeah, something like that," Rainbow replied, shoving bottles into her saddle bags. Once she'd taken them all, she headed back home. Ignoring the strange looks she got, she eventually made it back to her small apartment.
Immediately after closing the door she dropped her bags, pulling out a bottle and gulping it down. Then another, then another, until she was so drunk she couldn't think straight. "I'll be with you soon, love..." she muttered quietly, dragging her bags across the hall. Once in her bedroom, she drank two more.
Stumbling across the room, she kicked open her nightstand, pulling out a picture frame which had been laying face-down. She picked it up but dropped it, shattering the glass everywhere. Growling in frustration, she leaned down and took the picture out, laying it on the bed. On it was Applejack, smiling away at the camera, not a care in the world.
"Why... Why'd you have to go..." Rainbow Dash whispered, tears beginning to fall from her face onto the blankets. She turned around and drank the rest of her bottles, as quickly as possible, pausing only to vomit up pure whiskey onto the hardwood floor, before turning and drinking more.
Stumbling to the bed, Rainbow Dash gave a soft hiccup before climbing up onto it. The pain in her stomach began to intensify, but she barely noticed it over her drunkenness and tears. She lay her head down on the pillow, holding the picture onto her chest.
"Hello, Applejack... Lovely to see you again..." She murmured softly as she closed her eyes.
Fa la la la la la la, fa la la la la la. Fa la la la la la, fa la la la la la...
Author's Note
...You expected a happy ending, didn't you...?
Sometimes, people don't get happy endings.
But that doesn't mean you shouldn't strive for one.
This is in no way portraying suicide as a good thing - rather, showing the hurt it can cause.
Remember that, even when it seems dark, there is always a light. There is ALWAYS someone who still cares.
Please, point out any spelling mistakes you see, so I can correct them. I have no proofreader.
