Arc 2; Friends on the Other Side: Chapter 8, Drinks All Around

(Michael’s POV after rolling away)

        My little rolling session was quickly ended by a house that managed to place itself in my way. I was now walking around town simply enjoying the scenery and learning the layout of the town. After a couple minutes I had found myself in an apple orchard, and was standing in front of a barn.

        “What the hay?” An orange pony with a blonde mane walked over, “Howdy! Welcome ta Sweet Apple Acres!”

        I nodded, “I’m Michael... Nice place you got here.”

        She grinned, “Why thank ya, we’ve been growing apples for years.” She looked at me for a second, “Um... Do ya know Dean by any chance?”

        “Yeah... Not personally though. Just met him twice now.”

        She nodded a bit, “Ah thought so, ya don’t seem like the others. Ya come here for somethin’ or where ya just walking around?”

        “Just walking,” I shrugged, “But I am kinda in the mood for an apple.”

        She grinned and walked over to a bucket before pulling out an apple, “That’ll be two bits.”

        I reached into my pocket of holding and produced the money, “Here.” Grabbing the apple I went to take a bite before a person literally jumped out of the apple bucket.

        “Sup Fuckers?” He was a sixteen year old kid with a tricorn hat and brown leather jacket with black jeans.

        I stepped back, “How in the everlasting fuck did you get in there!?”

        He stepped back over to it and stuck his head in saying, “No smaller than your mom’s ass, so it wasn’t hard. I’ll tell you what was hard though...”

        Applejack looked at him, “What?” ‘YOU DOOMED US ALL!’

        He spun around and did a Michael Jackson crotch grab, “MAH DICK!”

        I facepalmed, “Oh sweet jesus.... Look, who are you?”

        He stood straight and gave a bow, “I am Porndar, first king of the Dickhead race, proud people of Fellatio VII. Are you not ready to get a mouthful?”

        I twitched a little, trying to keep calm. “I want your real name... Not a fake one.”

        “And I want to have sex, but we can’t have everything we want, can we?”

        Applejack walked up to him, “Lookie here! You just popped out of my apple bucket and start spewing filth. Now ya have five seconds to vamoose!”

        He put a hand to his ear and leaned down, “Could you repeat that? The southern accent is so thick I can almost hear the burning crosses and racial slurs.”

        She stammered as I sighed, “Why the hell are you here?”

        He did a pelvic thrust, “Me want fucky-fucky.”

        I grinned internally, “Well... I know this one girl who wouldn’t mind. Her name’s Sarah, she’s in town.”

        He got right in my face and smiled, “Who said I was looking for a girl?”

        ‘NOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPE!’ I pushed him away a little, “You seem like the type to fuck bitches and hoes.”

        “Well,” he put a hand to his chin in thought, “dogs and garden equipment are pretty far down the list, so not yet. Soon, maybe.”

        I twitched, “J-just go away please.”

        He shrugged, “Guess I’ll find some other hot piece of ass. See ya around!”

        ‘I fucking hope not.’

        He pulled out an umbrella and opened it, “PORNDAR, AWWAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYY!” He flew into the air like Mary Poppins.

        I looked at Applejack, “Please for the love of god tell me you got booze.”

        “CATCH YA LATER HOT STUFF!” He shouted back.

        I shivered, “Really strong booze.”

        She shook her head, “Ah think Big Mac sold the last of it. Alex might have some.”

        Out of nowhere, the guy was back, “Did someone say Big Mac? Oh my~ That just sounds delightful in itself...”

        ‘OH SWEET JESUS!’ I turned to him, “Just go please! Now! You can fuck everyone in Ponyville for all I care!”

        He pouted, “I would much rather come than go~”

        I screamed in rage and pulled my hair, “JUST FUCKING LEAVE ALREADY!!!”

        He held his hands up and walked backwards, “Alright, alright, jeez... I’ll leave.” He pulled his umbrella out, but looked at me again, “And my name is Joshua Volpaig, sex extraordinaire.”

        I sighed, “Michael.... Michael Fritz.” I looked at him, “Only fair I say mine.”

        “Yep, would be rude otherwise. Like jumping out of a strangers basket of assholes- I mean apples and scaring the shit out of everyone. Except that was good comedy. Anyway, see ya later.”

        I just waved him off as Applejack looked at me, “Um... Ah think ah’ll come with you to Ponyville. Ah need a drink.”

        I nodded, “I swear this place is trying to drive me insane.”

        I knocked on the library door and Alex opened it. “Oh hey Michael, Applejack. What do ye need?”

        I walked past him, “Booze. Lots of booze.”

        He grinned and pulled out a few glasses, “Alright then...” He handed Applejack and I a glass and poured in some kind of fruit smelling drink. “To booze.”

        I clinked my glass against his, “To memory loss.”

        Applejack clinked to, “To good lives.”

        We drank the liquor and the night became a blur.

(Paige’s POV)

        I woke up with a yawn as Dean gently shook me, “Come on Paige. We’re going to get Kate today.”

        I groaned as I looked at him, “Give me a minute... I need to get ready.”

        He smiled, “Sure thing.” He then left the room.

        I got up and put on my wizard's robes and grabbed my cutlass before walking into the hallway. I looked at Dean, “I’m ready.”

        Dean smiled, “Not yet you aren’t. I got some toast for you in the dining room if you want some.”

        I grinned, “Yes please!”

        He then picked me up and placed me on his shoulder as he grinned, “Then lets get you some toast.”

        He walked down the hallway and we passed by Beth, “Hello!” I waved.

        “Morning Paige.”

        We kept walking and we finally made our way into the kitchen. Dean set me down at a table and I stared at the plate of French Toast in front of me before eating.

        “I take it you like it.” Dean laughed.

        I looked at him, “I love French Toast... I’m somewhat glad they had it at Ravenwood.”

        Dean frowned, “They were the ones that took you, right?”

        “More along the lines of pulled.” I looked at him, “Did you know they had talking owls there?”

        Dean groaned, “Talking weapons are enough. I don’t need to know an animals opinion on why humans “Are such strange creatures!” thank you.”

        “Oh Gamma was very nice. I just hated the Kroks.”

        Dean sighed, “Me and Death are going to have a nice long chat about this place...”

        “They’re nice people. They take kids who have the ‘gift’ and train them on how to use it in magic.” I shrugged.

Dean’s eyes narrowed, “That doesn’t excuse the fact that they kidnapped you...” He sighed, “Kate and I really missed you Paige.” He hugged me, “I’m just glad you’re safe... ish.”

I hugged him back, tears forming in my eyes. “I missed you too Uncle Dean...”

He wiped my eyes as he smiled, “Come on, no more crying. Let’s go get your sister.”

I smiled, “Sure... Want to hear about some of the adventures I went on?”

Dean grinned, “Every funny detail you can get in.” He lifted me up to his shoulders again as all three of us walked out of the manor, “I’ll even tell you some of mine!”

I grinned, “Where to start... Oh I know! How about the time I went to Marleybone.”

Dean groaned, “Why does that sound like a pun...”

“Well... The setting is based around victorian England, but with talking cats, rats, and dogs.” I think I saw his eye twitch a little. “I even met their greatest detective, Sherlock Bones.”

“WHAT IS MY LIFE!?!?” Dean exclaimed as he face palmed.

“I also learned this.” I held my breath as I felt the sensation of falling leaves over my skin before appearing in front of Dean, causing him to stop.

“Ughhhhhhhh........” Dean grimaced, “That is so amazing yet so strange...” He shook his head, “Then again, I’m not one to talk.”

I grinned. “Anyways... At the end of my travel across Marleybone I had to fight Meowiarty.”

Dean gritted his teeth, “PUNS... THE PUNS...”

“Afterwards I had to go and talk to the emperor of Mooshu.”

“Let me guess. Cows.”

“Plus pigs and goats. Also the oni... Giant. Elephant. Demons.”

“Eesh...” Dean flinched, “I remember those. Had to do a drinking contest with one... I thought I would have died from Alcohol poisoning...”

I blinked in confusion, “I just killed about four of them, War, Plague, Death, and Jade.”

He laughed, “Well now I know they just called themselves that to scare people.”

“Not really. War started a civil war, Plague killed thousands with an incurable disease, and don’t get me started on Jade.” I shivered, “He was boosted from the water and fruit of life.”

Dean shook his head, “As I was saying, there’s no way they could be the true horsemen. If they were, the world would have been wasted.”

I blinked, “I never said they were horsemen. But anyways, enough of the depressing stuff! How about I tell you about my house.”

(Michael’s POV)

        “Ughhhhhhh Where am I?” I blinked as I noticed I was laying on top of a statue. “The fuck?” I looked around and saw a crowd had gathered around me, “Sorry, sorry!” I got off and looked at the ponies. “Nothing to see here move along!”

        They all walked away and I looked at where I was. I had woken up near the center of town just a few dozen feet away from the library. I sighed and raised an eyebrow when I saw my hammer sitting at the statues feet. I grabbed the hammer before walking to Sugarcube Corner for breakfast.

        I looked up and saw the sun was past it’s prime. ‘Holy shit I slept that late!?’

        I blinked in shock when I heard Sarah’s voice, “Hey Michael!”

        I looked and waved, “Hey Sarah!” I saw a woman in gangster clothing, “Who’s the new girl?”

        It looked like Sarah was about to speak but the girl cut her off, “The “new girl” is Alexandra Eisenberg, and  I’ve been a Wraith for about five years, kid.” I blinked at her thick German accent.

        I raised my hands, “I meant it like you had just arrived, not like you just became a wraith.”

        Alexandra narrowed her eyes, “What is your name? I feel like I’ve met you before...” ‘What?’

        I blinked, “Michael Fritz.”

        Her eyes widened, “Are you related to Nathan Fritz at all?”

        “How do you know my dad?” I said suspiciously.

        She started laughing, “W-what? Your father? Oh Lord... Did he not tell you about his connections to us?”

        I shook my head, “No. My father always kept things from me.”

        She laughed harder, “You’d think practically being a member of the German Mafia would be something to tell your children!” WHAT!?

        “What!?” I twitched. “What? I don’t even... Fuck my unlife.”

        “And,” she continued, “and now... that makes you an honorary member, according to family rules. Glückwünsche, Michael Fritz, und willkommen in der Familie.”

        I don’t know what she said, but I think it’s ‘Welcome to the Family.’ I sighed, “Tài bàngle.” ‘Lets see the confusion...’

        She smirked, “Не пытайтесь ввести в заблуждение меня, мальчик, это не будет работать.”

        I blinked before smiling, “فهمت. ومعوجة السر؟"

        She tilted her head to the side, “Hversu mörg tungumál þú veist í raun?”

        I shrugged, “שלוש.ואנחנו צריכים להפסיק במקרה שרה מתרגזת.”

        Alexandra pouted, “Por kjo nuk është e bukur...”

        I sighed, “Ja, og Sarah kan drepe oss i løpet av sekunder.”

        She smiled, “Ίσως, αλλά έχω μια καλύτερη ευκαιρία.”

        I was about to speak, but Sarah shouted. "Licuit, licuit vos volo facere stupri lingua cacas? Peius 'adicies ad illud, faxo mea conlationem! Suus' solum lingua scio praeter Anglorum, sic utar stupri Latine! Quam operor vos stupri similis eam!?"

        I blinked, “Paenitet.”

        “YOU’D FUCKING BETTER BE!” She yelled.

        I blinked a couple times before motioning to the library, “Well, I’m going to go and find Alex so I can remember what happened yesterday.”

        She took a few deep breaths, “Right. Before you go, do you know where Paige is? Arlosia wanted to meet her.”

        I shrugged, “She went with Dean yesterday, I think she’ll be here soon though...”

        I blinked as a bunch of leaves came from an alley and reformed themselves into Paige, “Oh cool! So this is the commons area.” She looked at Sarah and waved, “Hello!”

        Sarah sighed, “Uhh... I’m not going to question how the hell that just happened, because I just got my sanity back and I want to keep it. And hi.”

        Paige looked and saw Arlosia and grinned, “Oooh, who’s that?” She looked at Alexandra. “And who’s that? I’m Paige!”

        Sarah gestured to them, “This is Arlosia, and that is Alexandra.”

        Alexandra nodded as Arlosia waved, “Hi.”

        Paige blinked, “Oh wow! You look so cute!”

        Arlosia glowed purple and looked away. “Uh, thanks?”

        Paige smiled, “You’re welcome.”

        “So... You use magic to?” Arlosia looks really flustered right now.

        Paige nodded, “Yep! Thurgatury and Pyromancy the most, but I can cast some Conjuration and Necromancy.” Wait what!?

        Arlosia looked at her in surprise, “Wait, what?”

        Paige grinned, “Yeah... I can summon a ghoul, maybe a banshee if I concentrate.”

        “Huh... I tried demonology, a type of conjuration, but that just ended up killing me. I stick to destruction now.” Wow...

        Paige grimaced, “Ooh... I had to wait five minutes before the comet I was on crashed into a planet.”

        Arlosia looked at her blankly, “What the fuck...” Oh god damn it...

        Paige blinked, “What? My legs were trapped under unmelting ice.” She grimaced, “I don’t like remembering that.”

        “Again I say: what the fuck...”

        Paige waved her hands, “Anyways! What spells can you do?”

        Arlosia shook her head, “Oh... Uh... Well, I can do this.” She pointed her hand at a trashcan. “Demon’s Roar.” A symbol appeared on the trashcan before a tiny ball of energy flew from her hand and caused an explosion, sending the trashcan flying.

        ‘Holy shit...’

        Paige clapped her hands, “Cool! Do you want to see what I can do?”

        Arlosia blinked, “Uhh, sure.”

        Paige grabbed her cutlass and looked at us, “You might want to stand back a bit.”

Sarah nodded, “Alright then...” they stepped back as I joined them.

She took a deep breath and started drawing a symbol of what looked like a flame in the air before piercing it with her cutlass. “Phoenix!” I stepped back as the ground began to rumble and my jaw dropped open when a giant bird made of fire burst outwards, spreading it’s wings over the town. The bird looked at us before raising it’s head to the air and cawing, shaking the nearby windows and causing a jet of fire to launch itself into the air.

It stopped and looked at Paige before slowly fading away into ashes.

‘HOLY SHIT!’

Arlosia closed her dropped jaw and stared at Paige, “That... Was fucking awesome!”

Paige glowed a little, “Thanks.... I can teach you if you want.”

“Really!?”

‘By god she looks happy...’

Paige nodded, “Yeah. I have an entire book filled with spells like that. We just need to see what school you belong to....”

Arlosia ran up to her and gripped her arms, “Holy crap I think I fucking love you!”

Paige glowed, “Um.... Thank you? Anyways! I think you might fit the bill for Storm magic. But by your attitude I’d say Fire.”

Arlosia tilted her head, “That’s how you classify magic users where you’re from? We do it a lot differently...”

Paige grinned sheepishly, “Yeah, it’s weird. But we have other names for them, There’s Theurgists, Pyromancers, Conjurors, Diviners, Thaumaturges, Necromancers, Sorcerers. And just recently we got the astral schools of Sun, Moon, and Star.”

        “Huh. We classify them as Arcane, Fire, Frost, Nature, Shadow, and Holy. Then they’re split into Abjuration, Conjuration, Divination, Necromancy, Enchantment, Transmutation, Evocation, and Illusion. Then there are fourteen subschools, Descriptors, Rune Magic, and Divine domains. It gets kind of complicated after a while.”

        She blinked, “That does sound complicated... Our’s base off of each other, Fire and Storm combine into Life where as Storm and Ice combine into Necromancy. Then I belive Fire and Ice turn into Myth. Balance simply does it’s own thing by taking from every other school, then after that Sun boosts spells, Star boosts the wizard, and finally Moon transforms the wizard into something else.”

“Cool. Magic back home is-”

        Sarah interrupted them, “Okay, can we please not talk about complicated shit I don’t understand? You saw what happened with the languages, let’s not make it worse.”

        Paige shuffled her feet, “Sorry....”

        Sarah spoke up, “It’s fine. I think we should go now, you two, there was some stuff I actually wanted to get done, and we’re kind of wasting time here.”

        Paige looked at Arlosia, “Aww... It was nice meeting you.” She hugged her, “I can teach you later.”

        Arlosia glowed brightly, “Uh, right.... See you later then.”

        Paige let go, “Later.”

        Sarah walked over and picked up Arlosia, “See you guys later than.”

        I waved them off, “Later.”

I blinked as Sarah walked over to a pretty large shadow and stepped into it before popping out of another. “Well,” She said, “that’s pretty useful...”

Paige clapped her hands as I facepalmed, “Oh god....”