My Little Crull - Friendship is Chaos

by McNeil

Rating: teen
Tags: Other, Comedy, Rarity, Gummy, Fluttershy, Adventure, Pinkie Pie, Crossover, Twilight Sparkle, Gore, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 9103

Chaos Lord Crull shows up in Equestria and forms an odd friendship with Pinkie Pie...

Chaos Lord Crull of the World Eaters appears in Equestria for unknown reasons (probably due to Warp travel gone awry). Stranded on this strange world, he slowly discovers the meaning of the word 'friendship' as he forms bonds with a certain pink pony.

A Warhammer 40K crossover. What fun is there in making sense?

Proofreading done by Dramaideale. Big thanks to you, man.

Published 2012-01-12 07:29:32 UTC
Last updated 2012-02-03 21:45:53 UTC

Chapter 1: Can I keep him?

"Forces of Chaos, FILL ME WITH POWER!"

Chaos Lord Crull woke up surrounded by darkness. He took a deep breath. The air felt damp and... clean. As he rose to his feet, his eyes adapted to the darkness. He gave his surroundings a glance. The place that has been honoured by his presence happened to be a forest of sorts. It was far from pretty, being rather swampy, having crooked trees and thorny bushes with little to no leaves as most of its flora.

Crull did not mind the eyesore. He was not one for admiring views, he was a fierce warrior meant to spill blood for the glory of Khorne. In fact, the man fit in with the forest's ugliness. The Chaos Lord was bald, his face wrinkled and pale, looking like a demonic skull. The resemblance was intensified by his lipless mouth in which he sported jagged, pointy teeth.

His hideousness was only matched by his impatience and lack of wits. Crull grunted, scratching his head and started to pace back and forth, pondering how he ended up on this world.

Then it hit him. He'd forgotten how dangerous Warp travelling is and apparently this time it did not go smoothly. Probably because of that new Psyker Navigator's inexperience. He couldn't even remember where he was going with his warband and to make matters worse, his bolter and Khornate mace were missing. It filled the warlord with rage, or rather raised his rage to levels higher than usual. He was always pissed off. With his armoured fist, he punched a hole in a nearby tree.

“I'LL HAVE THAT NAVIGATOR TORN TO PIECES!” he screamed at the sky in a sickening, gargling voice. “I SHALL SUCK HIS EYES OUT OF THEIR SOCKETS AND CHEW ON HIS HEART!”

Crull struggled a bit in order to free his fist from the tree's trunk. Only then he got the idea that he could contact his ship. He opened a communication channel, but he received no damned signal, nor could he send one. In yet another fit of fury, the warrior reduced the damaged tree to a pile of splinters with repeated forceful punches, accentuating the pounding with a flurry of obscenities. Now angered by the fact that the tree did not bleed, he stomped its remains into the ground. Only then did the Chaos Lord decide it'd be best to simply march forward in hope of eventually finding a way out of the forest.

***

Crull did not know how much time he spent wandering the forest. The Chaos Lord was a tough man, forged in the fire of battle. It would take more than mere woods to tire or stop him. He fed on the denizens of the forest when he could and drank the foul water from puddles he found on his path. He marched on unhindered, barely getting any sleep, adamant in his resolve to get out.

“I will get out of here, and when I do, I shall find a way back to my warband, even if I have to DROWN this whole world in BLOOD”, he kept saying to himself.

And yet the damned place would not let go of him. It seemed he would be forced to walk this forest for eternity if not for one fateful encounter.

The warrior heard some rustling that did not come from him roaming the forest. Quite some time had passed since his last meal, so he welcomed the potential prey. He moved on in the general direction of the sound, trying to be sneaky despite having no stealth training and being clad in full armour.

Eventually he discovered the source of the noise. It was a strange hoofed creature, its fur shades of grey, its mane a mohawk striped grey and white. To his surprise, it was wearing what looked like golden jewellery. It did not matter though. He hungered and the animal was twice the size of any living thing he encountered here so far. It seemed to be occupied with picking leaves off of some plant with its teeth, so it didn't notice him.

Crull tried to sneak up on the thing, but he froze as he stepped on a twig that snapped under his heel. The animal looked behind it and noticed him. Its eyes widened. It started to run.

“ACCURSED TWIG!” roared the man as he gave chase. “Come back here, you damned animal! I SHALL SUCK THE MARROW FROM YOUR BONES!”

As he chased the creature, he snapped off both of the metal spears attached to his armour's backpack. They were getting tangled in the forest's canopy, making the chase difficult. After he tossed them aside, he realized he could've used them for hunting his prey down. The Chaos Lord let out a roar of rage, but it was too late to retrieve the spears.

Suddenly, a large figure appeared between him and the animal he was chasing. It happened so fast that he didn't have time to stop and crashed into it. It was surprisingly soft and... furry. Crull heard the thing roar. He backed off and gave the beast a look. It appeared to be a lion with bat wings and a scorpion's tail. And it had the height of two men.

“Perfect!” he gave a shout. “Finally a challenge worthy of my prowess! YOUR SKULL SHALL MAKE A FINE ADDITION TO THE SKULL THRONE!”

Crull noticed the hoofed animal watched him with curiosity from a safe distance. Even better. He would chase it down after he'd dealt with the monstrosity in front of him.

The beast let out another roar and gave him a swipe of its clawed paw. He dodged, grabbed the paw with his hands and sunk his teeth in the monster's arm. He heard the creature howl in pain, as it raised the limb he was biting into. He was now dangling above the ground, held in place only by his teeth attached to the beast's arm.

“Ah wohnt leht gho,” the warlord said, trying to sound as clearly as he could without letting go.

He noticed the flaw in his plan when the monster lashed out at him with his tail. He felt a prick on his neck. Everything went dark as the Chaos Lord slipped into unconsciousness.

***

Crull started to regain his senses slowly. He was too weak to even open his eyes, but he could smell the aroma of various herbs filling the air. He could also hear voices.

“He attacked a manticore on his own? Oooh, he must be soo brave!”

“Brave or stupid, I do not know. He did, I must say, put on quite a show.”

So someone rescued him. Good. He would grant them the mercy of swift death, as opposed to a long and gruesome one. He could feel his strength slowly coming back.

“But but but, you said he was aggressive. Is he really, really, REALLY dangerous?”

“The manticore's poison messed with his brain. All his bloodlust will now be in vain.”

That sentence was enough to fill Crull with burning rage that instantly energized him. He opened his eyes, rose to his feet with a jump and subsequently banged his head on the ceiling.

“AGH! WHAT IS THIS PLACE?!” he roared. He had to bow his head a little to fit in. He turned to face the source of the voices. The rage that dwelled inside him has now been replaced by pure shock.

Before him stood the same creature that he chased through the forest and another one, a bit different from it. This one was pink and had a mane and tail of a darker shade of the color. It looked at him with something that appeared to be a mix of shock and curiosity. He could not, however, sense any fear.

“WHAT ARE YOU?!” Crull yelled.

“Oh, he's so silly,” replied the pink one. “Haven't you seen a pony before?”

“Ponies?! I HAVE BEEN RESCUED BY PONIES?” He walked up to the pink creature as the grey one looked at him with anticipation. The warrior raised his fist to deliver a deadly blow to the pony, looking straight into its eyes. But something was wrong.

He was one of the toughest warriors among the World Eaters. He had slain countless Space Marines, Eldar, Tau and members of other sentient races of the universe. He enjoyed slaughter in the name of Khorne, he drank the blood and chewed on the livers of his enemies. And yet he could not land a punch on the creature standing before him.

He fell to his knees, dumbfounded, his clenched fist still in the air.

“Oh, look, Zecora! He wants a high-hoof!” said the pink pony and hit his armoured fist with its hoof.

Crull looked at the one called Zecora.

“WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME?!” he screamed.

“To the poison I put a stop,” she said. “And now you're as dangerous as a mop.”

The Chaos Lord could not believe it. Why couldn't he kill them where they were standing?

“You foul creatures! WHAT PURPOSE DO I HAVE IN LIFE NOW?”

The pink pony put on a wide grin, obviously having something in mind.

“You can come with me to Ponyville! I'm sure Gummy will love you becauseyouhavesuchbeautifulteethandI'llintroduceyoutomyfriendsandmakepartiesforyouand-”

“Pinkie Pie, are you sure this idea is sane?” Zecora interrupted. “This creature is dumber than a candy cane.”

“Oh, I'm sure everything will be alright! Just look at this hubbly-wubbly face, do you think he could hurt me?”

As the two were discussing whether or not the pink thing should take him with it, Crull pondered about what he heard. Ponyville was probably some kind of settlement. Maybe he could devise a way of getting off of this world there.

“Very well,” he interrupted the two creatures. “I shall take up your offer, but heed my words! I shall look for a way out of this place and will not stay here a second longer than necessary!”

The one called Pinkie Pie started jumping around in joy, squealing. Zecora sighed, looked at him, then at the pink pony. Finally, she spoke to her friend.

“I see there is no stopping you. I can only hope that his words are true.”

After she bode Zecora farewell, Pinkie led Crull out of the zebra's house.

“Go forth, pink pony! LEAD me to this PONYVILLE of yours!” Crull yelled in his 'casual discussion' voice.

“Oh my, you're so energetic!” Pinkie Pie said happily. “I'm so glad I asked Zecora for those mint leaves, because you see, if I hadn't asked her, she wouldn't find you and if she hadn't found you, I wouldn't take you to Ponyville and thatwouldbesadbecause...”

The pony talked all the way while leading him out of the forest. Almost without catching a breath, as if she did not need air to survive. Normally, Crull would be irritated to the point of ripping her head off, but somehow, he felt different. For the first time in his life, he did not feel rage. Well, he kind of did feel it, to a much lesser degree than usual though. And he also felt warm inside. It was not the blood-boiling heat of fury. It was something different.

“I wonder what that strange feeling is!” he yelled inside his head.

Chapter 2: So many wonders

„CAN NO ONE OFFER ME A CHALLENGE!?”

“...And that's how I discovered that the dreaded cupcake thief was actually me all along! Isn't that a doozy?”

“YES, it indeed is a... doozy!”

They'd been walking for quite some time now and not even once did Pinkie Pie stop talking. Strangely, Crull found her stories interesting. They were appealing to him for an unknown reason.

Suddenly, Pinkie stopped.

“Wait wait wait wait,” she exclaimed. “I didn't even ask you for your name!”

“I am known as Lord Crull! You better remember it, little pony!”

Pinkie stood on her hind legs, pressing her hooves against Crull's armour. She looked into his eyes.

“Oh, I'll NEVER forget it, Crullie!” she said with a wide smile, her eyes sparkling. “We are friends now, you and me! Friends don't forget each other's names!”

She hopped further along the path, singing some song to herself. Crull simply stood where he was, too confused to take a step. Friends? Were they really friends? And more importantly...

“SHE CALLED ME CRULLIE!” his mind boomed. “HOW COULD SHE FORGET MY NAME IN SUCH A SHORT TIME!?”

He heard Pinkie's voice. It snapped him out of his muse.

“Crullie, what are you waiting for? We're almost there!”

The pink pony was far ahead of him. He caught up to her, noticing that they were about to leave the woods. Not far ahead laid what seemed to be a town.

“We will reach Ponyville soon!” Pinkie said. “I'm sure you will love it!”

“This Ponyville... I want to KNOW what it is like!”

Pinkie Pie started jumping around him energetically as she replied. Crull could swear that at one point she somehow ended up in his armour's backpack and stuck her head out so that he could hear her.

“Ponyville is the best place ever! Unless Canterlot is the best place ever, then it would make Ponyville the second best place ever because the Princess lives in Canterlot and that's why it would have to be the best place! But Ponyville is so pretty and lively and all my friends live there and we hang out and party and-” she stopped for a moment to catch her breath - “I LOVE IT!”

She was standing on his head as she yelled the last sentence. Crull did not know how the pony ended up there.

Pinkie hopped off of his head and continued talking as they made their way to Ponyville.

“And I'm sure you'll love it too! It will leave you speechless!”

And once they reached their destination, leave him speechless it did.

He never saw the likes of the structures that made up this town. Everything was so colourful and... what did Pinkie Pie say? Pretty?

And there were also ponies, of course. Ponies of various sizes and colours, they all looked different, yet strangely similar to each other. Each one was occupied with their own business. One was pulling a cart full of round, red things, another one was busy commending some bottled substance to other ponies in a loud voice. However, most of them stopped in their tracks and stared at Crull when they noticed him. There was fear in their eyes. Or maybe it was curiosity?

As he was gazing at his surroundings in awe, Pinkie led him further into the town.

“Mr and Mrs Cake went to Fillydelphia to open a new shop there, so they won't come back for a looong time!” She giggled. “And that means you can stay at Sugarcube Corner for now!”

Crull's brain was too busy processing all the sights, sounds and smells of his new surroundings to form a response, so all he did was nod with a blank expression, his mouth wide open.

***

“Helloo-ooo! Is anyone there?” Pinkie knocked her hoof on Crull's head. “You've been sitting silent for an hour now! What's wrong with you?”

They were in Pinkie's room on the first floor of Sugarcube Corner. Crull had not yet recovered from his state of intense thought, which involved a lot of noise going on in his brain. He was just sitting there on the floor, not even minding this green, toothless thing that stuck to his forehead with its soft gums.

Finally, he slowly rose to his feet. He approached the window and looked at the town beyond it.

“Pinkie Pie!” He said in his indoor voice, which was no different from his outdoor voice actually, “This place INTRIGUES me! I WILL STAY HERE FOR LONGER!”

The pink pony giggled. “I knew you'd love it!”

She hopped up to the window, stood beside Crull and detached Gummy from his forehead. The alligator retreated to his corner.

“I also know another thing you'll love! An introduction party! But that will have to wait until tomorrow, the shop opens in an hour and I need to bake some fresh cupcakes for the customers!”

Before she headed downstairs, the mare gave him a glance. “I think you should get some rest for now, you still look kinda weak from the poison.”

“ME?! REST?! Ignorant creature, a warrior of Khorne does not rest until he's slain all of his enemies!”

And yet as he exclaimed that last sentence, he felt a surge of dizzines. He had to lean on the wall to keep his balance.

“See, Crullie? You get some sleep, I must take care of the shop!”

And with that, she left. Crull sat on the floor.

“Damn you, Pinkie Pie! If not for that wretched manticore's influence, I'd show you what I'm capable of!”

He wouldn't admit it, but he did feel tired. Slowly, he gave in to the embrace of sleep on the spot where he was sitting.

***

Crull was woken by someone violently shaking him by the shoulders. Turned out it was Pinkie.

“Crullie, wake up! This is a disaster!” she said with an expression of distress on her face.

“Let go of me, Pinkie Pie!” As soon as she let go, he jumped to his feet. “What is going on!? AN INVASION!?

“No, silly! Something worse!” The pony stood on her hind legs and clutched her head with her hooves. “I AM MISSING THE MOST IMPORTANT INGREDIENTS FOR MY SUPER SPECIAL ORDER!”

“Ah, yes!” A grin of understanding appeared on Crull's face. “You want me to get those INGREDIENTS for you!”

She looked at him as if he'd said something funny. “No no no, I can get them myself, but It'll take time and I won't be able to take care of the shop!” The mare pounded his armor with her hoof. “I need you to sell our sweets to the customers, there's no other way!”

Crull couldn't believe what he'd just heard, although it seemed like the only thing to keep him occupied for now. “How do you expect me to do it?!”

Pinkie took him downstairs and quickly explained how to manage the shop.

“And remember,” she finished, “When you are in the back room and hear this bell” - she pointed at the bell on the counter - “You MUST come here, give the customer a nice, big smile and say a hearty hello!”

“I understand!” exclaimed Crull. “By Khorne, I SHALL SELL THOSE PRODUCTS TO ALL THE WEAKLINGS WHO DESIRE THEM!”

Pinkie Pie giggled. “Good to know! Okay, I must go now, good luck!”

And with that, she darted out of Sugarcube Corner, leaving Crull behind the counter.

***

An hour has passed since the pink mare left him in charge of the shop. He'd sold some sweets to two ponies so far. His gentle, friendly words quickly convinced the ponies to buy huge amounts of sweets they didn't really need. However, they seemed disturbed for some reason. Crull suspected it might had been his looks, but he decided not to think about it too much.

Besides those two ponies, there were no customers. Bored, he started cleaning the emblem of Khorne on his armor, but it detached itself and came falling to the floor. He knelt to retrieve it, but he could not see it anywhere. It was as if Tzeentch himself hid it somewhere.

As Crull was kneeling on the floor behind the counter, looking for the lost emblem, he heard the bell. He quickly jumped to his feet, opened his mouth wide, exposing his teeth as much as he could and yelled “HELLO!”

He heard a squeal of fright and saw a yellow-pink blur that darted towards the door. Unfortunately, the door opened to the inside, so the pony slammed face-first into it. It sat on the floor in confusion, dizziness in its eyes.

“LITTLE PONY!” Crull tried to urge the pony to stay as much as he could. “Come, buy those delicious sweets! FEEL THE TASTE!”

That last yell must've snapped the creature out of its confusion. It quickly opened the door and ran away at a speed that astonished the Chaos Lord.

Shortly after that, Pinkie Pie returned. She burst into the place, anxiety in her eyes.

“Crullie!” She yelled. “I met Fluttershy and she told me there was a monster at Sugarcube Corner and I was worried that you were in trouble so I came as fast as I could!” She stopped to catch her breath. “Where is it?”

“There is no monster!” Crull replied. “And if there was any, it would be no match for ME! I WOULD SPILL ITS BLOOD FOR KHORNE!”

Pinkie laughed. “So she must've taken YOU for a monster, Crullie! And here I planned on introducing you to her today. I think that after I'm done with the baking we should go to her house and prove that there's nothing to be scared of.”

Crull gave her an uneasy glance. “I AM MEANT TO BE FEARED! WHY SHOULD I DO THAT?!”

“So she could become your friend, silly! The more friends you have, the better!” She pondered something for a second. “Friends make you stronger, you see!”

The Chaos Lord thought for a second. Stronger? In that case...

“FINE! Lead me to that coward's house!”

Pinkie nodded. “I think I'll let you do the talking. But remember, you must be kind to her or she'll go nuts!”

“Very well! I will be kind! PONYVILLE WILL TREMBLE WITH MY KINDNESS!”

Pinkie sighed again. “I think it would be good if you also ask her to give you some lessons in kindness.”

***

“FLUTTERSHY!” Crull roared as they reached the pony's house. “I DEMAND THAT YOU TALK TO ME!”

There was no response. Pinkie Pie shook her head.

“I think I will go talk to her first. You wait here, Crullie.”

And so he waited. And waited. And waited. Finally, as the sun was setting, the door slowly opened. The yellow pony he saw earlier that day slowly came out of the house, looking scared out of its mind. Pinkie followed, staying close to her, as if to give her courage to face the terrifying man.

“FINALLY!” exclaimed Crull, content that his wait was finally over. “Know this! I could easily FLAY your skin and wear it as my trophy! But instead I have come to assure you that you don't have to fear me! I want to be your friend!”

“F-friend?” Despite what he thought a perfect encouragement, she seemed even more frightened. She turned her head to Pinkie Pie, who gave her a reassuring nod. When she spoke again, her words were soft and quiet as a breeze.

“Um, Pinkie told me a lot about you. She said that I can trust you and that you're good at heart.” She smiled anxiously. “I think I'll need some getting used to you, but I can be your friend if you want me to.”

Crull smiled. “Then it is settled! May we benefit from this friendship FOR THE GLORY OF KHORNE!”

Pinkie Pie sighed with relief. Everything went better than expected.

Fluttershy flew up to him and gave him a nervous hug, as if she still feared him. Crull couldn't understand her fears, but as her mane brushed his cheek, he felt a sensation that no battle had brought him yet. He felt warm and soft inside for a moment.

When the yellow mare let go, she smiled. The smile was a little less fretful now.

“You could try to be a little more... gentle,” she said. “Um, I mean... If you want to, that is.”

“VERY WELL!” said Crull with one of his gentler shouts. “Khorne DESPISES weaklings, but I shall be gentler just for you!”

Fluttershy giggled nervously. “Uh, yes, of course. Now, excuse me,” she said, as she slowly backed away. “I... have to feed the dishes and wash Angel.”

When the pony entered the house, she gave both Pinkie and Crull a little wave and slammed the door shut.

Pinkie chuckled. “Great! Now you have another friend besides me and Gummy! Let's go, I want to throw an introduction party for you tomorrow, we've got some preparations to do!”

Crull grinned. “PERFECT! I will have a FEAST dedicated to myself! Let us go then!”

And with that, they headed to Sugarcube Corner to start the preparations for a party that would forever stay in the memories of Ponyville's inhabitants.

Big thanks to Dramaideale for proofreading and pointing out oddities in Crull's behaviour. This chapter would've been a disaster without you, man.

Chapter 3: Chaos looks good

„Unrelated quotes add spice to the story.”

Crull stared at the scrambled eggs on the table in front of him. Pinkie Pie made sure that his breakfast wouldn't consist of the usual pony fare and he appreciated it. However, he couldn't get himself to eat the eggs. He had a nagging feeling that something was just not right.

The source of his uneasiness turned out to be Gummy, neatly stuck to Crull's head with his toothless jaws. Pinkie detached the alligator from the man's forehead in order to feed it.

The feeling had finally passed and Crull efficiently gobbled down his delicious meal. It was better than eating small creatures in the Everfree Forest, but he would've preferred some true meat.

„So how do you feel, Crullie?” Pinkie asked when he was done eating. „Today is your special day! There will be a party just for you and you will meet so many new friends and I'm so excited ohmygoshIcan'twaituntiltheevening!”

Of course, she exclaimed that last part without catching a breath, happily bouncing around the table at which Crull was sitting. He'd already gotten used to this behavior.

“It feels GLORIOUS! I cannot wait to have a celebration just for MYSELF!”

The warrior rose to his feet, picked the pony up and held her in front of him.

“Khorne will surely REWARD you for this, Pinkie Pie!”

“Oh, I'm sure he will!” she replied with a grin which quickly turned into a thoughtful expression. “Whoever he is.”

When Crull put Pinkie down, she inspected him from head to toe. What she saw was a man wearing dirty, clumsy armor with unfriendly, threatening ornaments that signified slaughtering others rather than befriending them.

“I think we need to get you a new outfit, Crullie. This one just doesn't give off the right vibe.”

She knocked her hoof against his armored leg.

“And you'll have trouble hugging anypony!”

Crull looked at his apparel. It looked fine to him.

“Mad pony! I will not put away my armor! Doing so would be FOOLISH beyond imagination!”

“Oh, then we will just have to make it look better somehow! And I know just the pony for the job! You must look good at your own party, you know!”

***

“Here it is!” Pinkie said excitedly. “Carousel Boutique!”

Crull eyed the building they arrived at. It was different shades of pink, blue and yellow, ornamented with various geometrical figures and what seemed to be pony mannequins slapped here and there. He didn't feel like he belonged there. Then again, he hardly belonged anywhere in this world.

“What is our business here?!” he asked his companion.

“My friend Rarity lives here! She will surely find some way to make you look better!”

The pink mare approached the building and knocked on the door. She went inside once she apparently got the permission to. Crull stood in front of the boutique, adamant in his belief that he looked just fine. What was Pinkie Pie thinking?

The party pony looked out the door and waved for him to get inside. Crull hesitantly moved forward and went in. The interior was really spacy, full of clothes, mirrors and more mannequins. Across the room stood the pony Pinkie told him about. Her coat was white, her mane and tail purple. The man also couldn't help but notice that the mark on her flank was different than Pinkie's. He didn't pay attention to those marks on ponies before, but he thought it an interesting feature. Did every pony have a different symbol?

The mare's back was turned to them as she was finishing cutting a square of silk into complex patterns. Crull noticed that both the silk and the scissors floated in the air in front of the pony, covered in a bluish aura.

When the fashion designer put down the accessories, she turned around. As soon as she saw Crull, she flinched and let out a terrified gasp. This pleased Crull.

“You do well to be AFRAID of me, little pony! That's a sign of wisdom!”

“Oh, but I am not afraid of you... whatever you are.” replied the mare when she regained her composure. “Just look at yourself! You look terrible! That attire needs some good maintenance!”

Pinkie giggled. It seemed like the scene was nothing new to her.

The realization that the pony was scared of his outfit's ugliness was like a chainsword to the head. Crull didn't even notice when a metal wash-tub full of foamy water slid through the floor to him, covered in bluish hue.

“My name is Rarity and, by Celestia, I will not allow Pinkie's friend to walk around Ponyville in something so insulting to fashion!” the pony said with an expression of righteous fury towards all things unfabulous. “What's your name?” She added, her muzzle suddenly expressing an honest, friendly smile.

“I am Lord Crull of the World Eaters! And I shall not-”

“Very well.” A sponge levitated over to Rarity, her expression changing back to the furious one. “Pinkie. Grab the second sponge. It's time to restore some shine to this apparel.”

“NEVER!” yelled Crull. Pinkie, who was happily hopping over to take the sponge, fell over and Rarity dropped hers, surprised. “I will NOT have you clean my armor! I SHALL DO IT MYSELF!”

He picked up the sponge that Rarity wanted to use on him, soaked in the water and started scrubbing at his armor with an expression of hurt pride. He proceeded to thoroughly clean his outfit as the two ponies indulged in a conversation. He could hear Rarity whisper “What, exactly, is he?”, to which Pinkie simply shrugged.

After half an hour, his armor was so shiny that it could act as a mirror.

“Now, this is much better,” Rarity exclaimed as she admired her own reflection in the armor.

“Do you think you could do something pretty with it?” Pinkie asked her friend.

“Oh, I already have something in mind. Some silk here and there, maybe gold linings and those bloodstones that I haven't used for anything in a while...”

Crull smiled as he heard the word 'bloodstones'. He decided he might like this pony after all.

Rarity took measure of him and trotted away to get the needed supplies, humming some song to herself.

“Better not interrupt her when she works,” Pinkie whispered to Crull in a conspirator's tone”. “Let's go back to Sugarcube Corner to make preparations for the party.”

Being a creature unable of whispering for whatever reason, Crull agreed with a nod.

***

Crull was taking the last batch of muffins out of the oven as the doorbell rang. He put away the apron he was wearing. Earlier he deliberately smeared ketchup on it so it looked bloodstained. He approached the door, but Pinkie was there first. Not surprising.

The pink mare opened the door. In front of them stood Rarity, obviously content with the results of her work. A brown package was mounted on her back.

“I came here as soon as I finished my work. I'm sure you will love it!” she said as Pinkie let her in.

The white pony laid the package on the table using her magic and opened it. She lifted what was inside, held it suspended in the air and unfolded it. Crull's mouth has been left agape when he saw the results of Rarity's work.

In front of him levitated a crimson tabard with a gold outline. The neck was encrusted with green-red bloodstones. On the chest were emblazoned two gold unicorns standing on their hind legs and crossing their horns as if they were locked in a duel. With the cloth came a gold sash for tying around the waist, holding the whole thing firmly in place.

Crull and Pinkie stared in awe at the tabard. Rarity was fully aware of the effect it had on them, having a smug expression plastered on her face.

“Come on, try it on. It's yours.”

The Chaos Lord did as he was told. He helped himself into his newly acquired garb and looked at his reflection in a mirror that Pinkie Pie seemingly conjured out of nowhere.

“Now aren't you simply dashing?” Rarity asked.

Pinkie seemed to share her sentiment. “Wow, Crullie, you really look great! Much much much much better than before!”

Crull was very content with his new attire. “This tabard,” he said, “it is a thing of MONSTROUS beauty!” He looked at Rarity. “What do you demand in exchange for this GORGEOUS clothing?! Trophies? Skulls? HIDES?!”

Rarity smiled. “Oh no no no, nothing at all, darling! You're Pinkie's friend, it's a gift from me to you!”

Crull looked at the pony, dumbfounded. He then directed his gaze at Pinkie, but she only nodded with excitement.

“A gift?! I have never received a FREE offering before! You have my thanks, little pony!”

“Oh, you're most welcome,” Rarity replied, her eyelashes flapping as she blinked charmingly. “I will be most content if you wear it proudly. That's all I'd ask of you.”

“You have my word! I SWEAR TO KHORNE, I SHALL BEAR THIS TABARD WITH PRIDE!”

“Um, yes.” the mare looked a bit uneasy at that moment. “Now, I've still got some orders to complete, so if you will excuse me...”

Pinkie Pie saw Rarity to the exit while Crull was still busy contemplating his gift.

“I'm so glad you like it, Crullie! Poor Rarity would be heartbroken if you refused it. She must've worked so hard on it...”

“Say, Pinkie Pie!” Crull asked calmly as he finally averted his gaze from the mirror, “Was this offering a sign of SUBMISSION or AFFECTION!?”

“Silly Crullie!” Pinkie apparently thought he said something funny. “It was a sign of friendship! Rarity is very generous, she might not usually look like it but it's true! And I can see that she really put extra work into this. And all that because you're my friend! And now you're her friend too!”

Crull smiled, exposing his pointy teeth. “I am starting to ENJOY this... friendship!”

“Well duuh! It's awesome, I don't know why you would think otherwise!” She took a look at the clock standing in the corner. “I think it's about time we started preparing the backyard for the party. I just finished preparing the punch when Rarity dropped by and I see that the muffins are ready too.”

As Crull was carrying the long tables over to the backyard, he realized that he felt something else in addition to the satisfaction of getting such a glorious present. He felt something warm inside him, a feeling almost identical to the one he experienced the previous day when he first listened to Pinkie and when Fluttershy gave him a hug. The Chaos Lord then thought that this friendship thing might actually have some properties unknown to him. He decided to think the topic through after he'd learned more about it. His skull was at risk of bursting from intense thought at that point anyway.

Pinkie laughed excitedly when everything was ready for the visitors. The tables bore delicious confectionery, cupcakes, muffins and pie among them, and punch bowls were placed in strategic positions. There were many games prepared, including Pin-The-Tail-On-The-Pony, Twister and even Bingo. A gramophone was elevated on a pedestal, giving a strange vibe of anxiety, as if it couldn't wait to play cheerful party songs.

The pink pony sat on a chair beside Crull, shivering in anticipation. They couldn't have been more ready. The only thing left to do was wait for the ponies to come to the party.

Again, big thanks to goes to Dramaideale. This fic would be pretty messy without the guy.

Chapter 4: Fear of the Dork

“Finally a challenge worthy of my prowess!”

The sun was already setting when the party proper started. Ponies had been arriving slowly at first, but eventually the crowd had gotten quite impressive. The mood was very cheerful, set by colorful paper lanterns and music booming from Pinkie's gramophone. Ponies were really enjoying the party, dancing, drinking and having friendly conversations in small groups.

Crull and Pinkie did an admirable job preparing Sugarcube Corner's backyard for the celebration. Three long tables stood there, each bearing huge bowls of punch and tasty snacks, varied enough to appeal to widely differing tastes. Confetti, streamers and balloons complemented the lanterns with a wild array of colors. As the sun finally disappeared on the west, Luna's moon shed its light upon the yard, adding to the atmosphere.

Crull was sitting in his place at the head of one of the tables, sipping his punch. Pinkie had wandered off into the crowd to look for those of her friends he hadn't met yet, or something like that.

“I'm sure you will get along with them! I mean, you managed to befriend Fluttershy and Rarity, so you'll have it easy now!” she said before trailing off. It was about fifteen minutes since she'd left.

The Chaos Lord did not socialize much when Pinkie wasn't around. It wasn't hard when she was present, but things weren't so bright during her absence. The pink mare made sure to present him in front of 'everypony', but despite this being his introduction party, the ponies avoided him. They seemed nervous and scared while in his vicinity. Although Crull liked being feared, this state of matters didn't just sit right with him for some reason. He tried relieving the tension by yelling a hearty greeting every time a pony made eye contact with him, but it only made matters worse, to his surprise. 'Anypony' (Crull was starting to get used to the pony-specific terminology) greeted that way would back off awkwardly, looking for 'somepony' else to talk to.

“Why do they fear me?!”, he kept thinking. “They surely have not heard of me before I arrived here!”

He scratched his bald head and took another sip of the punch. Holding the glass with an armored hand was a challenging task. It was too easy to apply too much pressure and cause the liquid container to shatter.

“I will not stand for it!” Crull yelled in his head as he stood up. He was proud of the fact that he was starting to form progressively more complex thoughts without vocalizing them. It seemed convenient in this... society. “These ponies... are going to LOVE ME!”

On the other hand, their love would be too much. He froze in his standing position, hands resting on the table, as he gave the matter some consideration. If love was too much to ask for, he'd at least settle for...

“ADMIRATION, if possible!”

After that thought, Crull ventured into the crowd of ponies, looking for those suitable to become his friends, sure of the fact that Pinkie would easily find him if need be. He still didn't understand why he was doing this, but something inside him was compelling him to form friendships. He'd already come to terms with that. Fighting this world's influence hadn't yielded positive results.

Crull noticed a small group of ponies indulging themselves in some small talk. He walked up to them, making sure to expose all of his huge, sharp teeth in an outgoing, friendly smile.

“HELLO!” he started. “I'm here to make FRIENDS!”

The ponies looked at him with confused expressions on their faces.

“Uh, that's okay...” a yellow mare with orange mane and tail replied, hesitation in her voice.

Crull was content that the pony was willing to cooperate, oblivious to her tone of voice. He remembered one of the many things Pinkie told him while they were waiting for the ponies to come. Hugs are one of the best signs of close friendship.

“So you do want to befriend me! This PLEASES me! Let me give you... A HUG!”

“Wait, what?!” the mare only managed to let that out before Crull embraced her in a gentle, friendly hug that squeezed the air out of her lungs. The other ponies gasped, expressions of terror visible on their faces.

The yellow pony squirmed, trying to free herself of Crull's loving embrace, but it was clear that she was getting weaker with each second. The Chaos Lord himself was painfully oblivious to the fact that he was hurting her, having closed his eyes in an expression of bliss.

Finally, a brown stallion stepped out of the group.

“Let go of her, you brute! You're hurting her!”

Crull dropped the mare abruptly, surprised by the male pony's words.

The stallion walked up to his friend, who was now lying on the ground, trying to catch her breath and get over the shock caused by her hitting the ground.

“You okay, Harvest?” he said.

“Just... give me... a sec...” she managed to mutter, gasping for air.

Another mare from the group, a cyan-coated one, looked at Crull with disdain.

“You should be ashamed of yourself! You could've seriously hurt her!”

Crull backed away a bit before answering.

“Are you really that... FRAGILE to be left breathless by a simple hug?!”

The ponies looked at him with disgust. The brown stallion helped the mare he called Harvest get back on her hooves.

“Let's go, everypony,” he said. “There's no reasoning with this guy.

As they walked away, sending Crull angry glares, the Chaos Lord realized that he didn't take one factor into account when hugging the pony. Wearing his armor while giving others embraces was probably not the best idea.

“By Khorne!” he yelled at the sky. “I was such a FOOL!”

This attracted the attention of other nearby ponies, who looked at him funnily. Crull noticed that and backed away, looking for another group of ponies he could try to befriend, hopefully with better results this time.

***

Crull was sitting in his place at the head of one of the tables, sipping his punch. Alone. It looked as if there was an invisible forcefield around him, through which ponies couldn't pass. Of course, that was not the case. The party guests were simply too angry or afraid of him (sometimes both) to come close. The warrior couldn't understand it. He did his best to make friends, but his efforts were always in vain, only making the ponies back away from him.

He noticed Pinkie emerging from the crowd. She walked up to him slowly, head lowered. She was not her usual, cheerful self.

“Dashie and Applejack are busy putting out that little fire you started at the lantern display,” she said, looking around nervously. “And Twilight is busy fixing those winged cider mugs you made by squeezing magic out of Lemon Daze.”

She looked up at him, sadness in her blue eyes. “Things are not going well, Crullie. This party is turning into a disaster.”

Crull could read a lot from her expression and tone of voice. He'd managed to make a bad first impression on Pinkie's closest friends without even meeting them.

“I... apologize.” he said, not yelling for the first time in his life. Seeing Pinkie in that state of sadness and disappointment did that to him. It felt like having the Ultramarines tear at his heart with their chainswords.

Pinkie's eyes widened in shock upon hearing Crull use an indoor voice for a change. She gave her odd friend a sad smile, stood up on her hind legs and hugged him.

“It'll be alright,” she said, trying to sound reassuring. “I'll just help with the clean-up and we'll fix everything. You will see, you'll have lots of friends once everypony gets to know you better.”

With that, she trotted away, off to help set straight something that Crull had unwittingly broken in his attempts at making friends.

The Chaos Lord felt terrible. The realization that he was responsible for Pinkie's sadness made his throat feel tight, his head heavy. He wanted to set right what he'd done wrong, just to make the pink mare smile again.

But he'd probably end up making matters worse, just like before. And the thought of causing Pinkie even more sorrow kept him in his place, unwilling to do anything besides waiting for things to develop.

Suddenly, he heard a scream. A scream that was not caused by him. He looked up to see three mares cantering up to a purple unicorn.

“Twilight, it's a disaster!” one of them exclaimed, waving her hooves frantically. She had a cream coat and burgundy mane with a hint of pink.

Crull froze. Twilight? Wasn't that one of Pinkie's friends?

The purple mare looked at the newcomers with some reserve before she voiced her question.

“What's the matter this time, Rose?”

One of the mares who arrived with the cream pony was the one to give the answer. This one had a pink coat, her curly mane light green.

“The train station attendant just got a message that the Canterlot Express train headed here has damaged its brakes!” The information met with a collective gasp of the gathered crowd.

The third mare continued where her friend left off. Her coat was a darker shade of pink and she sported a lily in her yellow mane.

“And to make things worse, an overloaded cargo train snapped the rails just before it reached the station! They already sent it on its way, but the rails are still broken and the attendant didn't have time to inform Canterlot about the issue!”

All the ponies let out another terrified gasp, which was followed by impulsive yelling and running around as they tried to decide what to do. Twilight looked terrified as well, but an expression of thought was visible on her face nevertheless.

Rose finished the story. “The attendant already sent some stallions to fetch a set of replacement rails, but they won't attach them in time. They need some strong unicorn magic to quickly adjust them if the train is to pass safely!” She started poking her hoof at the ground nervously. “That's why we came to get you.”

Twilight nodded, having apparently made sense of the chaotic presentation the trio put up. “We've got no time to waste then.” She turned to an orange mare wearing some kind of a hat. “Applejack, try to calm everyone down, then meet me at the station, I might need some help.”

The name poked at Crull's attention. Another one of Pinkie's friends.

Applejack adjusted her hat. “Ah'll do mah best, Twilight.”

The purple pony nodded again and cantered into the town. Crull stood up. He realized that this was his chance at redeeming himself. In the general chaos, nopony seemed to notice the huge, armored man as he followed Twilight Sparkle into the night.

***

The Chaos Lord arrived as Twilight was inspecting the rails. The station workers cut out the broken part, making a long gap in the track. It was at least ten meters long.

The purple mare started as Crull appeared beside her. She gave him a surprised look.

“Oh, you must be Pinkie's new... friend.” She exclaimed. “I must say, you caused some interesting things to happen at the party.” The unicorn giggled nervously. It seemed she was trying to cope with the stress of having to save a train full of ponies.

“Save it for later, little pony!” Crull yelled, finding some relief in returning to his usual voice. “Where are the new rails?!”

The unicorn's expression changed to that of determination as she remembered to focus on her current goal. “Mr. Stockton and his helpers should be here any minute with a new set. I must say I'm glad you came to help, though that was quite... unexpected.”

She opened her mouth to add something, but was interrupted by a brown stallion who led four earth ponies. Every one of them was dragging a set of rails.

“Twilight, I'm so glad you came! We can't waste any more time, the train will be here in less than five minutes!”

A set of lights gleamed in the distance, as if to prove the pony's words. The lights seemed to be getting closer with each second.

The station attendant jumped in place. “We will set the rails in their place and I'll tell you how to adjust them. Quick, boys! The train is coming!”

As they worked, the lights drew closer and closer. Twilight tried to fix the rails as fast as she could, but it was clear she wouldn't make it in time. Tears started welling up in the mare's eyes, frustration mixing with terror inside her.

“I need more time!” she yelled.

Crull looked at her, then at the impending train. He made his decision on the spot. The Chaos Lord hopped onto the rails and ran along them, facing the speeding Canterlot Express.

At the same time, the crowd from the party arrived at the site. Pinkie was there too. He could hear her scream “Crullie, no!” as he ran. But it was too late to turn back.

As the train was close enough to blind him with its lights, he stopped and threw his hands in front of him. He braced himself for the impact.

Then the train hit.

Crull managed to stay on his legs thanks to his armor's weight and endurance, but he couldn't keep his arms outstretched. Instead, the space marine let the machine press against his chest. Crull's legs were breaking the wooden planks that made up the track, but the World Eater was doing his best to offer as much resistance to the speeding vehicle as he could. It seemed to be working. As his feet started to get buried in the ground, the train slowed down slightly.

It was apparently enough. He soon heard Twilight scream.

“Crullie, enough!”

A bit off-put by the unicorn using the name he'd only heard Pinkie exclaim before, he responded during the second he spent speeding in front of the crowd.

“I CAN'T LET GO NOW!”

He then noticed a purple hue surrounding the train. Soon the glow gained more colors and the machine started slowing down. It stopped at the outskirts of Ponyville, with Crull buried to his waist in the ground.

The Chaos Lord helped himself out of the hole and leaned against the train. He noticed the Crull-shaped indent he left at the front of the vehicle.

He started hearing voices. It wasn't his voice, which he usually heard in his head. Those seemed to come from outside. He looked up to see the ponies in the train cheering and waving at him. One pegasus mare flew out and gave Crull a kiss on the forehead and hugged him. The engineer in charge of the machine gave the Chaos Lord a salute.

Crull smiled. This felt surprisingly good. All the tears he caused in his life up to this point were tears of unspeakable sorrow, caused by the slaughter in the name of Khorne. Not tears of joy.

Soon, the crowd from Ponyville appeared, cheering as well. Pinkie was running on the front, Twilight beside her. The pink mare jumped at Crull. The impact somehow managed to do what the train could not – it threw the Chaos Lord to the ground.

Pinkie stood on him, looking him in the eyes.

“Oh, Crullie, I'm so glad you're safe!” she said, tears welling up in her eyes despite the smile of wild joy and relief plastered on her face. “Don't you ever go doing something like that again!”

Crull laughed. “Foolish pony! It had to be done!”

Pinkie smiled again and got off of him. As he stood up, he could see Twilight Sparkle smiling gratefully.

“Thank you... Crull.” It seemed Pinkie told her his real name on their way there. “If it wasn't for you, we wouldn't have made it in time.” She eyed the gathered crowd.

Pinkie started to explain the situation as well.

“The other ponies helped with setting the rails, too! And then all the unicorns agreed to stop the train when it passed safely! They couldn't do it earlier, because it was too far away and it was going too fast, but you slowed it down and it all ended well thanks to you!”

She stopped to catch her breath. Twilight took that opportunity to speak. She addressed the gathered herd this time, though.

“I think we all made the mistake of judging the book by its cover, everypony. I know that... Crull has caused some trouble tonight, but Pinkie told me that he was just trying to make friends. He helped save a train full of ponies, so he can't have bad intentions. I think we should all give him another chance.”

Everypony cheered in agreement. Crull stepped forward.

“Ponies of Ponyville!” he yelled. “My most important desire right now is to make FRIENDS with you! I am a fierce warrior by nature, sworn to fight for the glory of KHORNE, but I do not wish for you to fear me! This feeling I cannot EXPLAIN in full, but I do not aim to hurt you! I want to learn about friendship from you all!”

The cheering boomed even louder as even the ponies who hesitated earlier joined in. They surrounded him, giving him hugs and shaking hands... hooves with him.

It was the happiest moment of Crull's life. He didn't feel that happy even when he and his troops savaged a whole squad of Crimson Fists, bathing in their blood. Or when he sucked the Eldar's eyes from their screaming skulls on Lorn V. Nothing compared to the sensation he felt among the cheering ponies.

Among all the cheering and loud, happy celebration, he noticed Rarity walking up to him. She inspected him from head to toe and let out a sigh.

“Come to the boutique tomorrow, darling. You got your tabard all dirty and torn. I'll have to take care of it.”