Alastair Equus

Glaring at the sand-trap, Alastair spotted his golf-ball, sitting in the dead centre. Figures… He quickly trekked his way to the middle, picked up the ball, and placed it on the edge closest to the hole.

“No, no, no!” A fat priest shouted at him. “That would be cheating!” The priest grabbed up the ball and took it to the other side of the bunker. Placing it on the ground, he stomped on it until only a tiny portion remained above the grass. “Perfect! And use this one!”

Alastair eyed the club the priest was holding out dubiously; not only was it a putter, but it was only about a foot long. Sighing, he grabbed the club, doubled over, and eyed the hole. Excellent! There was a Raider standing right in front of it! Drawing back the club, he swung as hard as he could.

“Nice shooting, kid.” Sully mumbled around the cigar that was perpetually clenched in his teeth. “You missed the Raider you were aiming for, but stunned six others!”

Alastair looked around for his ball, then to Sully. The man in the Hawaiian t-shirt pointed out of the canyon they were in, and over the nearby cliff. Shoulders slumping, Alastair started trudging his way towards the edge. “Oh, and kid, one more thing…” Glancing over his shoulder, Alastair saw Sully open his mouth, and…

* * *

Alastair bolted upright on the couch. Struggling not to let loose a string of swears that would have made a veteran sailor blush, he still got his point across. “HOLY SWEET SON OF A… mother loving… mongoose!” He thought he heard a similar explosion from elsewhere in the room, but couldn’t tell over the sound of a polka marching band.

Twisting around, he glared absolute murder at the offending party; Pinkie Pie had somehow acquired a tuba, a set of symbols, an accordion, a harmonic, as well as a bass drum, and was merrily playing them all at once while marching around the room.

As Pinkie completed one more circuit of the room, she stopped in front of the door to the kitchen, where Alastair saw most of the other girls had clustered. “Both up at once! I WIN!” she happily cheered.

“You cheated! Purposefully waking them was against the rules!” Applejack argued.

Alastair, in the meantime, was still piecing together just where he was. Ok, still in Horse Land or wherever… in the Library… so that wasn’t some epic dream, then… A hazy memory floated up to the surface of his conscience. Already knew that… Wait, what are they talking about?

“But they were taking so looong, they both should have been up by now! I’ve been up for hours and hours and hours waiting for you guys!”

Flopping back down on the couch, Alastair threw an arm over his eyes, blocking out the light, but the sounds remained, keeping him awake. Irritably throwing his arm back off, he rolled his head to the side, noticing a blue Pegasus similarly trying to bury her head in a cloud-pillow.

“Pinkie, you have five seconds to explain why I’m up at this horrendous hour…” a gruff voice emerged from the clouds.

“We-ell, we’ve all been awake for hours, and you two were the only ones left asleep, silly! So we had a bet going as to who would wake up first, and I won!”

“You cheated!” insisted the farmer pony.

Alastair cracked one of his eyelids open, glancing at his watch; the digital display read ’11:26a’. “She’s right, it’s an ungodly hour, back to sleep.” He muttered, rolling towards the couch’s back. At that moment, however, he smelled something wafting from the kitchen. “On the other hand, food’s always good!”

“It’s true what they say,” Applejack nudged Twilight as Alastair rolled off the couch. “Fastest way to a man’s heart is through his stomach!”

* * *

Alastair stared at the plate in front of him; an omelette topped with melted cheese, mixed in which were several chunks of red and green peppers, as well as some mushrooms, with a raw carrot off to the side.

With a shrug, he dug in. Not my regular choice, but heck! Not my regular world either! Worriedly chewing at the peppers and mushrooms, he nevertheless swallowed, smiling at Twilight. “It’s delicious, thanks!” She smiled, nodding at his gratitude. The others (save for Rainbow Dash) had already had similar breakfasts, and the last two meals had just been keeping warm on the stove.

“Oh, not a problem; it’s just regular fare around here!” She left the human alone to his meal, heading back to the main room to try and help the others entice Rainbow out of her cloud.

Chewing another couple of mouthfuls, the human nodded. Not bad, could do with less peppers, but a little more pepper. Frowning at how odd that sounded, even in his head, he shrugged before taking another bite.

“Who?”

Glancing around, Alastair spotted an owl on the windowsill. “Hey there, little guy! Who’re you?”

“Who?”

Chuckling, Alastair grinned. “You. I guess you’re Owloysius?”

“Who?”

“You? Twilights assistant.” (Halfway across town, an angry dragon bolted upright. “I’m Twilight’s number one assistant!” “Who’re you talking to, eh?” One of his companions asked.)

“Who?”

Alastair ruefully shook his head. I can see where this conversation’s going… but heck, I’ve never talked to an owl before! “You.”

“Who?”

“You.”

“Who?”

“You.”

* * *

Applejack chuckled, shaking her head as her friends tried and get Rainbow Dash’s attention; knowing the multi-coloured Pegasus as well as she did, Applejack could confidently say that Rainbow wouldn’t be up for another hour at least, just to show that she could ignore them for that long.

Furtively looking to see if anypony was watching her, she took a tentative step towards the kitchen. Now’s as good a time as I’m gonna get… She didn’t really want to confront the human about the previous night, but darn it all, she held the Element of Honesty, and the Apple Family Tradition also dictated that she be truthful and upfront.

There were a number of reasons why she didn’t want to have that conversation. Firstly, there was no way it wouldn’t be embarrassing. Hey, so, Ah noticed you were sleeping on me last night! Comfy? And secondly… she knew (or at least thought she knew) that Alastair and Dash had a thing for each other, but darned if it didn’t feel nice last night! And the feeling that she got when he said her name…

Darn it AJ, just do it! You’re both grown, sensible ponies! …well, you are, he’s a human, but that’s beside the point! Just talk to him, you’re both mature enough to handle this!

Reaching the doorway to the kitchen, she peeked inside.

“Who?”

“You.”

“Who?”

“You.”
Now might not be the best time…

* * *

After an invigorating conversation with Owloysious, Alastair emerged from the kitchen to a slightly different scene from which he’d left; the cloud, which drooped a rainbow-coloured tail, had risen all the way to the roof, and had doubled in size. Twilight was busy perusing several books, Rarity and Fluttershy were sitting on the couch, talking, Applejack was leaning against the wall near the kitchens doorway, and Pinkie Pie… Pinkie Pie was missing, as far as Alastair could tell, and that frightened him.

Glancing around nervously for an incoming ball of pink, Alastair leaned next to Applejack. “Still can’t get her down?”

“Nope. Twi’s tryin’ to find a spell to disperse clouds, but…”

A sly smile crossed the humans face as an idea entered his head. “Well, darn!” He raised his voice, making sure it could reach the roof. “If Rainbow’s not getting up, I guess she doesn’t want her breakfast. Guess I’ll just have to eat it myself!”

“Over my dead body!” A multi-coloured trail was all that they could see, leading from the cloud to the kitchen; hair, clothes, and books were all blown into disarray from the passage. Applejack laughed at the chaos around her, looking at the human with a bit of respect.

“Well, why didn’t any of us think of that?”

“Sometimes all you need is a fresh perspective.” Alastair smiled, and then dropped his joking tone. “Hey, I was wondering… since it seems like I’ll be staying here a while, I don’t want to be mooching off other people for my entire stay. Any chance you need some help around the farm?”

Applejack shot the human a wary look. “Are you saying I can’t get all the work done by myself?”

Alastair quickly shook his head. “Nope. I’m saying I need the money, since you probably don’t accept Canadian currency.”

“Well…” Applejack was still hesitant. “What about with the others?”

“Well, let’s see;” He ticked the other girls off on his fingers as he went through the list. “To work for Rarity, I’d probably need to know how to at least sew, and I’ve never so much as picked up a sewing needle. Pinkie Pie works with pastries, and the closest I’ve come to that would either be eating cookies that my mum or sister made, or cooking a batch of semi-burnt pancakes. Twilight already has help, and Rainbow…” he pointed over his shoulder, “Well, I’d probably need to be able to fly… something my lack of wings hinders.”

“What about Fluttershy?”

Alastair frowned, looking off to the side. “Honestly? I have no clue what she does. We’ve barely spoken five words to each other… Is she… scared of me?” I’m not that frightening… Alastair thought. Ah, but what about that co-workers complaint? Shut up, she didn’t know that’s how I act around all my friends!

Meanwhile, Applejack was having a slightly different argument of her own. Why don’t I want to take his help? Well, Big Mac and I already finished most of the work before he left… but then again, Dashie said there’s a big dump of snow on its way, should get it all done before then… and imagine the look on Mac’s face if it was all done by the time he gets back! But it would mean being alone with him all day… then again, it would mean being alone with him all day! Coming out of her internal monologue, she gave her head a quick shake. “Naw, that’s just how she acts ‘round new comers. Give her a few days; she’ll be the same ‘round you as the rest of us!” With only the slightest bit of hesitation, she added “And sure, could always use an extra pair of hands.”

* * *

After a twenty minute trudge through a light curtain of falling snow, courtesy of Rainbow Dash (“Don’t want to attract any more attention to myself.” Alastair had explained his odd request. “Probably be best if I hid my… odd appearance under my umbrella and jacket”), and several minutes of setting up the equipment, Applejack turned to Alastair. “So, have ya ever Apple bucked before?”

Trying not to show his amusement at the name, Alastair shook his head. “No, we don’t do it like that back home; just pick ‘em. But, seeing as we’re in a ‘magical’ world and all, and how easily you made it look yesterday, I figure it can’t be too hard, right?” Seeing the look Applejack was giving him, Alastair started to feel a bit less sure of himself. “…right?”

Taking a step back, the farmer pony gestured to a tree with an amused grin. “Give it a go!”

Eyeing her warily, Alastair approached the tree. “Alright… didn’t look so tough…” Taking a deep breath, Alastair drew back, and kicked the tree with the heel of his foot. The tree shook a little, but not a single apple dropped. “Alrighty then, let’s try this again!” Swinging his leg as hard as he could, he felt that yes, there would be a bruise on his heel tomorrow… and still no apples to show for it. “Fun time’s over!” He snarled, backing up several meters. Crouching into the traditional runners starting position, he eyed the tree. “Let’s see if all that rugby practice finally paid off…” Pushing off as hard as he could, he ran straight towards the offending tree, angling his shoulder towards the trunk.

“I didn’t think that through very well…” He muttered several seconds later, as he lay on his back in the snow, several feet away from the tree. His shoulder felt like it was on fire, but he thought (and hoped) that nothing was broken. To add insult to injury, Alastair saw a single apple above him bounce around on its branch, before falling straight towards his head. Throwing up his left hand, he managed to catch it before the tree hurt him (and his pride) any more.

“Hah! I WIN!”

“Not quite, sugar cube.” Tilting his head to the side, he saw Applejack tip over one of the buckets that were around the base of the tree; empty. “How ‘bout I buck, and you carry these here buckets back to the barn, once they’re full?”

“Sounds good.”

They spent the next several hours going through this pattern of Applejack bucking, Alastair carrying, occasionally stopping for a short break and some chit-chat. Alastair soon found his arms to be burning, but trekked on despite this. ‘Bout time I got whipped into shape! Settling into the repetitive pattern, Alastair was surprised when, trudging back with an empty bucket, Applejack stopped in front of him. “Well, that’s it!”

Looking around himself, Alastair noticed for the first time that all the trees were, in fact, bare. “Really? I thought there was a lot more to do! This place looked huge!”

Applejack shrugged. “Well, to be honest, Big Mac and Ah got most of it done before he left. Just a little bit left to do, and it’s done! Here.” She handed him a small cloth pouch. Taking it warily, Alastair peeked inside it, so see a handful of thick, gold-coloured coins. Quickly eyeing them, he guessed there were about twenty in the sack. “Your pay for the days’ work!”

“Uhh… thanks?”

Applejack was startled by this reaction. “What? Expectin’ more?”

Hearing an insulted tone enter her voice, Alastair quickly shook his head. “No! Not at all! …well, maybe? I don’t know!” Throwing up his hands to ward off any outburst, he explained. “I’m new here, right? No clue what the currency is. For all I know, you’ve either given me five cents, or five hundred dollars. If the first, then yes, was hoping for a bit more, if the latter, then waaay less.”

“Oh.” A bit mollified, Applejack nodded slowly. “Makes sense. Sorry. Let’s see… that there would probably buy you an entire new set of clothes from Rarity. Maybe two.”

Eyes wide, Alastair shook his head. “No no nonononono, I can’t take all this! It’s way too much! Here.” He dug out five of the coins, then held the rest, still in the bag, back. “That should cover my wages. We didn’t even do a full day’s work!” Glancing at his watch, he was shocked to see it reading ‘7:42p’. “Well, almost a full day’s, but still!”

Applejack grinned, backing up. “No can do, sug’. You earned it. Besides, if you want to give it back, you’ll… have… to… catch me!” With that, she spun on her heel, dodging off among the trees.

Alastair was left standing, bag still in hand, staring after this baffling girl. “Really!” He shouted after her, “I was a winger!” That said, he sprinted after her.

Twisting his way among the trees, he had little difficulty following her. Thanks to Rainbow Dash’s weather patrol, there was still a light dusting of snow on the ground, imprinted in which were the hoof prints of the girl ahead of him. It had shocked him the night before, learning that these girls were just so much more like horses than he’d imagined, (“What are you, satyrs?” He’d asked at the time) but no more so than they’d been that he had feet. Now, though, he just took in all in a stride, lengthening his as he went. Remember, Crazy Legs, longer steps! Use those spindly legs you're famous for! His rugby coach had instructed him one session, and the advice came floating back. Pushing off with the balls of his feet, he did just that, and found himself to be covering more ground as he went.

He soon saw the blonde tail darting among trees ahead of him as he approached one of the hills on the property. Panting now, he shortened his stride to account for the grade of the hill; even so, he was still catching up. Reaching the crest, he saw that they’d reached the edge of the orchard, for stretching before him was a wide open field; without the cover of trees here, the snow was much deeper, reaching up to mid-thigh on him, he estimated. Glancing down the hill below him, he saw that the distance between him and his target had narrowed considerably. In fact, if he jumped, he could probably catch her… Ezio would be so proud of me… he thought, taking a leap of faith.

His prey let out a surprised squawk as he tackled her from behind. They rolled over each other on the way down the hill, before settling in a snow drift. Sitting up, Alastair was pleased to find Applejack pinned beneath him. “I have a sudden sense of déjà vu…” he grinned down at her.

Giving him a sarcastic glare, Applejack then turned her head to the side. “Well, I’m still not taking back your pay! After that chase, I’d say you earned it!”

Alastair smiled, an odd thought entering his mind. This scene, the two of them lying in the snow, seemed like something straight out of a romance movie. If he were the main actor, it would probably be at this point that he leaned down… it would be so easy to just lean in… and…

Kill her.

His eyes widened at the thought. Did I just…?

The darker voice came back. Wrap your hands around her neck, and squeeze…

Fuck.

Quickly pushing himself off her, he took several steps back. “Yeah… uh, fun and all, right? You’re right, I guess… Umm… is there somewhere I could go… to, you know, wash up?”

Levering herself up in the snow, Applejack gave the human a confused look. What in tarnation? “Sure, back at the house. Upstairs, second door on the left, there’s a washroom.”

“Thanks.” He sprinted away from her as fast as he could. Why are you back? I thought you were gone!

I’m a part of you, I’ll never be gone! Kill her, kill, kill, come on, grab an apple, choke her with it! The poetry of it, come on!

Angrily shaking his head, Alastair ran even faster, trying to block out the voice.

Following the tan ponies directions, the human soon found his way to the washroom, and locked the door behind him. Gripping onto the edges of the sink, he stared at his hands for several seconds, before looking in the mirror. Yes, it was back; the hidden look of anger, the pinching around the eyes, how they seemed to be glaring at everything and anything.

Fuck, why are you back?

I to-old you, I never left!

You did! After I quit!

Right, because doing something as simple as that would change who you are.

You aren’t me! You are nothing like me! I’m happy here, I have friends! Close friends! They care about me!

Alastair?!

Shutting his eyes, his head fell forwards. Great; not only do I have a psychopath in my head, but now I’m hearing other people, too.

No, silly, it’s really me! It was you she sensed?!

Raising his head, he stared into the mirror once more. Great, I’m hearing Pinkie. Crazy goes with crazy, I guess.

What are you doing here? How are you here? He frowned at this. That angry voice, the one that had plagued him for years… it reacted as though she were…

Is that really… you?

Yes, silly!

HOW?

Not the problem here, Al, don’t you think?

Kill her! Kill here with cake! Choke her, strangle her-

Yeah, you’re right. But… how?

Do you want my help, or not? Picture a room.

Shrugging, Alastair closed his eyes, and pictured a box-shaped room; white walls, a table in the middle, with several chairs set up around it, and only one door leading in or out.

Now see yourself, and the other voices in your head, in the room.

Frowning, he did as she said… and suddenly was in the room. Eyes darting around, he noticed there was someone sitting in the chair across the table from him; himself. Only, not him; he, the other he, was wearing a black business suit, with a white shirt, black vest and tie underneath. His hair was a darker shade than his own, and was slicked straight back; something Al had tried to do several times himself, but never managed to. Looking over a pair of black aviator sunglasses, the other he smiled. “Nice to meet you, me! And might I say, he,” the other Alastair pointed next to the original, “is one ugly mother fucker.”

Looking to his left, Alastair jumped backwards, shouting in fear and surprise. Looming right next to him was… well, again, it was him, but most definitely, certainly not him.

This newest Alastair looked to be a sick perversion of the original; dressed only in the tatters of what Alastair (the original) thought to be a strait jacket, Crazy Al stared at him with eyes like none other that he’d ever seen. Where normally the outer rims were white, Crazy Al’s were pitch black, and his irises, where normally Alastair saw either green, blue, or grey (staring in the mirror for what seemed like hours at a time, Alastair had frustrated himself countless times trying to solve the riddle of what colour his eyes were), Crazy’s were blood red. His hair, which had always been a vanity of Alastair’s, had grown long and lank, trailing down to his cheek where it feel over his right eye (Alastair quickly felt his own hairs curl, relieved to find it still only stopped at his eyebrow). His entire body was long and lean; more so than Alastair’s normally was. He stood slanted, askew, almost with a feral stance, his hands almost constantly clutching and unclenching, a habit which Alastair regrettably found that he’d developed from time to time. And Crazy Al’s fingers… Where Al’s were normally long and slender, Crazy Al’s were abnormally so, looking to be nothing but flesh and bones. His fingernails had grown long and ragged, forming something along the lines of claws; Alastair suddenly regretted all the times he’d tried to rebel against his parents orders, by hiding his hands and growing out his nails.

“That… that’s not me.” He said, turning back to Slick Alastair.

Slick shrugged. “He’s you, I’m you, you’re you.

“I’m you.” Alastair cringed; even Crazy’s voice grated on his nerves.

A knocking at the door drew all of their attention. Looking askance at the others, Slick turned to Al. “Someone you know?”

With a shrug, Alastair nodded towards the door. “Won’t know unless we answer it!”

Sighing, Slick stood up and opened the door. Immediately, the sounds of a carnival floated through, as well as several streamers and balloons, and one Pinkie Pie.

“Hi Al!” She piped up, waving at Slick as she sauntered past. “Hi Al!” She waved merrily at Alastair. “Hi- whoa!” She, too, took a step back from Crazy, who’d slunk up to her shoulder.

“Can I kill her?”

“NO!” Both Slick and Al shouted simultaneously.

“Three of you? Weird, never encountered that before!” She took a look around herself for the first time, noticing her surroundings. “Ugh, did you have to make it so bland?”

Alastair was automatically defending himself. “Well, it’s what you said! And sorry if I’ve never been here before! Didn’t know I could come here, actually… don’t think I could back home…”

Happily shrugging it off, the prancing pink pony look at the three Alastair’s. “So, who’s the problem?”

Slick and Al both pointed to Crazy, who in turn pointed to Pinkie.

“I see… and the original?”

Slick and Al both pointed to Al, while Crazy pointed at himself.

“Excellent! Thought so, just wanted to make sure! So,” She sidled up to Alastair, looking around conspiratorially. “What’s the deal with that guy?” She pointed at Slick.

“Oh, he’s fine; kind of who I wish I had the courage to be. He, however,” he nodded towards Crazy, who was gnawing on the table’s leg, glaring at Pinkie “Just came back. I thought he’d left years ago.” With a shake of his head, he suddenly seemed to realize where he was, and with who. “How is this even possible? Any of this! And how, did you, get in my head?”

“Oh, Pinkamina was growing restless, as she usually does whenever she senses a kindred spirit, and so I tracked down who the spirit belonged to! It was you!”

“Pinkamina?”

Suddenly, there was a fifth person in the room; as Slick and Crazy were similar in appearances to Alastair, so was the new-comer to Pinkie. She, though, lacked the fun-loving attitude of Pinkie’s, Alastair could tell right away; he entire being seemed darker, almost as if she were constantly standing in a shadow. Her hair, where Pinkie’s was bright and bouncy, was flat and dark, falling straight down past her shoulders. She was wearing similar clothing to Pinkie, but they were covered with a patchwork, multi-coloured apron, which looked to be covered in something suspiciously along the lines of blood. She idly twirled a large kitchen knife in one hand, which was also dripping red.

Crazy stopped his ministrations on the table leg, looking at the new Pinkie with interest. “I’m gonna stab you with that.” He said in a matter-of-fact tone, pointing one clawed finger at the knife in her hand.

Glaring at each person in the room, she paused for a moment, smiling a wicked smile at Crazy. “Only if I get to make you cupcakes.”

And just as suddenly as she appeared, she vanished. Staring at the spot she’d been standing, Alastair turned to Pinkie. “Were they just...? Never mind; that was disturbing on so many levels… and that was you?”

“As much as he is you, silly!” She pointed to the man sitting cross legged on the table, now chewing on a chair, while staring at where Pinkamina had been. “She only comes out on occasions like this! So, want to put him away for good?”

“YES!” Alastair shouted, grabbing his friend by the shoulders. “Put him away where he’ll never come back!”

Laughing, she shook her head. “I can’t do that!” Alastair seemed to droop, until she added “But you can!”

“How?”

“Picture him somewhere secure, and lock him up!”

Closing his eyes, Alastair focussed on the first place that came to mind. Suddenly, the floor under him was rocking from side to side, and he could hear waves outside. Opening his eyes again, he found them to be in the hold of a sailing ship, with Crazy, snarling and biting at the air, shackled to the wall. Slick… Slick was still Slick, but attired as a pirate captain. “Nice choice, matey.”

“Is he locked up?” Pinkie asked from next to Al. Frowning, Alastair concentrated, and more shackles appeared around his ankles. “Locked?” A key appeared in one of the locks, and clicked shut, before moving on to the next lock. “Ah ah ah, different keys!” Nodding, Alastair focussed again, and three more appeared. “Secure enough?” Slick, Alastair, and Pinkie were suddenly back in the first room they’d appeared in, sans Crazy. On the table before them, however, was a ship in a bottle, a cork securely stopping up the neck. Almost instantaneously, a dozen more identical bottles appeared, and then were dropped unceremoniously into a wooden chest. The room around them shifted again, and they were suddenly standing in the middle of a warehouse, looking down at a chest on a shelf. A plaque sat next to it, reading “Crazy Man’s Chest”. Curiously glancing at the other items around them, Alastair noted they seemed to be in the Pirate aisle. He also noted that they’d all changed clothing again; he was wearing a grey suit, with a light blue shirt, while Pinkie was wearing a black suit, with a purple blouse. Slick was wearing jeans, a navy blue tank-top, covered with a small leather jacket, and didn’t look happy.

“Really? I’m Claudia?”

“Shush, old man, she’s awesome.”

They were then outside of the building, and another key appeared in the lock on the door, sealing it. The scenery shifted once again, and they were back in the white room, with a model of the Warehouse sitting in a glass case on the table in front of them. “Good enough?” Alastair asked Pinkie.

“Yup! Looks awesome! Keys, please!” She held out her hand expectantly, and Alastair, noticing that he held all of the keys on a ring in his hand, passed them over. Depositing them in an inner pocket of her coat, she then reached into another pocket, retrieving a similar ring of keys, which she then handed to Alastair.

“What’s this?” He asked, mystified.

“They keys to Pinkamina’s cage!” She laughed at the expression on his face. “Seems only fair, right? I hold your demon, you hold mine!” All three of them looked about the room simultaneously, as a single, sonorous knock sounded. “Well, I should be going!” She cheerfully piped up, heading back towards the door. “Sounds like someone’s trying to get in!” Another knock sounded as she pulled open the door, almost drowned out by the carnival. “See you later, Al!”

As the door shut, Alastair shook his head, finding himself back in the bathroom. Sure enough, someone was knocking at the door. “Hold your horses! I’ll be out in a second!” he shook his head, muttering. “Really have to watch what I say here…” Looking back in the mirror, he was shocked, and pleased, to notice that he no longer looked perpetually angry. Quickly turning on the tap, he splashed cold water over his hands and face. The knocking came again as he shut off the tap, louder this time. “Give me a moment, would you!” briskly toweling off, he unlatched the door, pulling it open. “Couldn’t wait one… more…”

He’d been expecting Applejack, or the little filly (Apple… bumpkin?), and so had been looking downwards. All that he saw, however, was a wall of red. Alastair looked up… and up… and up, until he finally saw the face of the stallion before him.

Alastair was a bit miffed, to say the least; at 6’4”, graduating high school, he’d been one of the tallest people in the school. He was the tallest member of his entire family, and had passed his tallest friend in height several years ago. At his two old jobs, everyone else had been shorter than him, and at his latest, there’d only been one person who’d been remotely the same height. But this guy… he had several inches on Alastair at least, and the human absolutely hated feeling short. But where Al was tall and thin (his old friends had joked that hugging him put them in danger of getting a paper cut), this red behemoth was huge; Al would say he was even more buff than his strongest friend back home.

“…You’re not Applejack.” Was all that he could think of to say.

“N-nope.”

“…I can explain?”

* * *

Applejack heaved a sigh as she carted the last bucket back into the barn. Wiping her arm across her forehead, she contemplated how the day had turned out; they’d managed to finish all the Apple Bucking before the big snow dump, although not as fast as she and Big Mac could have, but that was beside the point. The human had been a help around the farm, and it was nice to have some new company while working on chores. But… What the hay happened back there? She glanced back towards the hill. They’d been having a fun time, or so she thought, with maybe just a hint of… but then he’d run off. Why? Was he scared? Something I did? Still confused, she made her way back to the main house.

Opening the door, she paused, sniffing. Apple Pie? “Hey, Al? You in here?”

“In here!” He entered the doorway from the kitchen, a slice of pie on the plate he held out to her. “Care for a slice?”

She eyed him momentarily; his joviality seemed a bit forced. “I thought you said you couldn’t bake!”

“I can’t.”

“Braeburn can.”

A third, lower and slower voice came from the kitchen. Alastair chuckled at the expression on Applejack’s face, stepping aside as she burst into the kitchen.

“Big Mac!” she giddily leapt into the awaiting stallions arms, giggling as he spun her around. “What’re ya doing home so soon, ya big galloot?”

“Brae got tired of me.”

“I called it!” Applejack crowed, shooting a triumphant look at Alastair. Her victory was cut short, however, by a low chuckling from the other male in the room.

“Nope; just finished ahead of schedule.” With a wry grin, he nodded towards Alastair. “He told me how y’all first met.”

The human in question shrugged, swallowing a mouthful of pie before forcing a chuckle. “Guilty as charged?”

Shaking her head, Applejack squirmed her way out of her big brothers embrace. “Well, Ah don’t think introductions are in order here, seeing as how you two’ve gotten so chummy so fast, but heck! Mountain of Muscle, meet Human. Human, meet Mountain of Muscle.”

Laughing softly at this, Alastair set down his empty plate, and stuck out his hand. “Nice to meet you, Mr. Muscle!”

“Likewise, Mr. Man.” Alastair grimaced briefly; I’m fairly certain that that’s what having all the bones in my hand broken feels like… Gently clenching said hand, he tried not to let the pain come through in his smile. “Well, it’s been nice and all, but I should probably be heading back to Twilight’s.” Glancing out the window, a corner of his mouth rose into a smirk. “Let’s just hope I get lucky with the weather again!” Giving a quick nod to the two farmers, he set out, but not before Applejack heard him muttering under his breath; “Oh, the weather outside is frightful, but the fi-ire, is so-o, delightful…”

She rested her arms on the window sill, watching the departing figure of her friend. To her surprise, a light dusting of snow started to fall; Rainbow said there wouldn’t be any more ‘til the weekend! She was even more baffled when the human, seeing the flurry of snowflakes before him, started dancing around. “It worked!”

Shaking her head in bemusement, Applejack turned away from the window, and almost crashed into a giant wall of red. “Sweet jumping petunias, Mac, ya gotta stop sneakin’ up on me like that!”

The giant merely shrugged, looking out the window. Muttering about how impossible it was for someone so big to be so stealthy, Applejack started towards the doorway, only to be stopped by a low rumble behind her. “You like him.” It wasn’t a question, but a statement.

Spinning around, Applejack shot a glare at her brother, but found it lost to his back. “Now why’d you go throwing ‘round accusations like that?”

Rolling his shoulders, he stayed where he was. “You let him work for you.”

“So what? Ah’ve let all my other friends lend a hand ‘round here, too!”

“Not when they weren’t needed.”

“I… I wanted to get all the work ‘round here done before you got back!”

“You paid him triple.”

“He needed the money!”

“So do we.”

Finding herself to be growing frustrated with her brother’s non-argumentative form of arguing, she tossed her hands in the air, storming out of the room. “He’s new here, doesn’t have any money, or anywhere ta stay! Of course I’ll help him out!”

Big Macintosh stayed where he was, staring out into the gently falling snow. It had grown lighter since the human departed, but looked to be following him; Mac could barely make out Ponyville in the distance through all the white. Shrugging thoughtfully, he turned back to the kitchen.

“E-eyup.”