Chapters One year. It’s been one year since Dashie left, and even after all this time I haven’t adjusted to her leaving. There will be days where I will open the front door after a long day of work and expect to see her lounging around on the couch watching TV or playing video games. Sometimes this will make me chuckle, sometimes it will make me cry. However, this time hit me the hardest; maybe it’s because of how long it’s been, I don’t even know. I dropped down to my knees, crying from all the memories of her flooding my mind at once. I felt worse than the day it happened, crying out her name between sobs, begging for her to come back. The feeling of utter helplessness filled my person as my vision went blurred from the salty tears.
Eventually, I got up off the ground and turned towards the door. I wiped away tears as I began to do something that I mindlessly did in my youth; I began to go for a walk. I remembered what had happened when I went to work the next day, I was heartbroken but I couldn’t talk about why for fear of them thinking I was crazy. As they kept on asking, I eventually had to tell them something, so I told them that I had lost my 20 year old daughter. After a few weeks I began to stop socializing with them completely, only talking with them about work related topics. That stage lasted no more than a month, and soon enough I was able to return to a semi-normal life.
As I walked along a trail, I let my mind wander with those thoughts while taking in the scenery. Occasionally I would find a spot which held a memory, and I would stop there and look back with nostalgia to the point where I practically saw Dashie in front of me. About an hour into the walk, I found the tree. It was the most prominent spot in all these woods, where Dashie and I reunited after our biggest fight. I sat down underneath it, reliving the event and how emotional it was for the two of us. I hadn’t stepped under this tree since the incident, which reminded me that I really needed to get out more often. I chuckled as I scolded myself for not getting much exercise, and slowly stood up deciding that it was time to head home.
I walked back into my home, reminding myself that, no, Dashie still wouldn’t be there, and yes, I was still alone. I went into my living room and sat down at the fireplace, looking over the seats which had once been filled by Celestia and Dashie’s friends. On the table in front of me were my last two physical reminders of Dashie’s existence, the letter and the photo album. Since she left, I had added a few more pages to the album of me at national parks, at parties, and at the indie 500. On that page was a ticket to the indie 500 that I was going to go to with Dashie, the other one having gone literally god knows where. When Celestia took Dashie away, she erased all evidence of her being here, so that may have disappeared too. However I was reminded of the shoebox that she carried with her before she left, maybe she brought it with her. Deciding not to dwell on it, I dropped the subject and put down the album.
For a while I just sat there, undisturbed, just enjoying the silence. I looked at the wall opposite to me, trying to force the pictures that once hung on it to reappear. However, before I could master my telekinetic skills, I heard something that I hadn’t heard in a long time- A knock at the door. Since friends had recently been dropping by for casual visits, I did the normal drill of hiding the album and letter to avoid answering some questions I’d rather not answer. As I walked down the hall the person at the door knocked again, the same tempo as before. Rolling my eyes, I called out to them “Who is it?” There was a brief moment of silence before the person spoke “Can I please come in?” The voice was obviously feminine, and oddly familiar, but that didn’t answer my question, so I told her “Today’s a bad day for me, and you still didn’t say who you were.” Another brief silence pursued, and the woman responded calmly “I know, that’s why I’m here.” I thought for a bit, debating whether or not to open it. It’s probably one of my co-workers or friends coming over to see how I’m holding up. It took a couple seconds to make a decision, but I chose to open the door. “Okay, seriously. Why won't you tell me who you are?” I said as I opened the door. However what I saw was not what I expected at all. Before me, once again, was Princess Celestia, looking at me with a smile on her face.
“Now may I come in? We need to talk.” She said, waiting for my response.
I was speechless, but almost instinctively I gestured for her to come in, and along with her trotted Twilight, Applejack, Fluttershy, Rarity and Pinkie Pie. As I watched them come in I was brought back memories of that fateful day when they took Dashie from me. Now, one year later, they have come back. As they entered the living room and sat down, I cut to the chase. “Why are you here? More importantly, where is Dashie?” I said, looking at them with mixed emotions. They all looked at each other, then turning to the Princess as if asking for guidance. Eventually, Celestia spoke “We’re here because of her. She doesn’t want to stay in Equestia anymore. She claims that she doesn’t belong with us, and that she belongs here, with you.”
Chapter Two - Desperation of Harmony
I felt a mix of emotions swelling through my mind, the most prominent ones being joy, anger, and fear. They came back to talk about Dashie, but why wasn’t she here? I tried to comprehend the question, maybe find the reason for Dashie’s absence hidden within the statement. If she wasn’t here, maybe they wanted me to convince her to stay in Equestria. It was her home, after all, and I remembered what I told her to try and make her feel better.
"It's your actual home, Dashie. You don't belong here. You need to go back to where you belong."
They were just words. How could I expect them to instantly make her feel better? However, I wondered how much time it has been for her since she left for her home. Surely, it couldn’t have been the same difference as the first time they came. Yes, she would have been devastated, but would they have returned after a day of her resisting the change? Or did something happen in Equestria? Wanting to know the truth, I escaped my thoughts to look at the ponies and asked them, “How long has it been?”
Twilight spoke up. “It’s been a year. As for here?”
I looked at her curiously. “A year? That’s how long it’s been here.”
I suppose you could say I was confused. According to her, one day in Equestria was a year on Earth. If that were still true, then I would have been dead for decades. That may actually explain why they didn’t bring Dashie with them. They must have been worried that they would return here to find out that I had been long since deceased. I couldn’t imagine how much that would have devastated her, but I remembered something I had been worrying about earlier. Why is Dashie still dwelling on this? The last I remembered, they had used a spell to restore her memories of Equestria. I saw Twilight perform the spell, so wouldn’t she be ready to be back home?
Wait a minute. They allowed her to keep her memories of this place, or at least, I assumed. Could that be the reason behind her pain? Was she torn between the two lives that she had lived, being forced out of what she thought was real and being filled with all the experiences of herself in Equestria? Trying to move back into the life she was told she lived, being told that what happened here shouldn’t have been. I could imagine her pain, and I felt the urge to yell at them for doing such a thing to her. However, something was wrong with them. Surely, their friend’s identity crisis would take a toll on them, but they seemed guiltier than they should be. Something bad had happened to Dashie, and I needed to find out what it was and why they’re actually here again to talk about her. Clearing my throat, I tried to think of how to word what was on my mind. As if Celestia was reading my mind (and she very well could be), she spoke softly, “I’m sure you want to know why we’re here now. Twilight, I suppose you should explain the situation.”
Twilight looked up at the princess and then back to me before starting. “Well, as you saw we tried to perform the memory spell on Rainbow Dash. At first, we thought it had worked. She seemed to know that we were in my library when we returned, and we asked her if she wanted to go back to her house. It wasn’t until we asked her that we realized that the spell had failed. She knew very little about Ponyville, only recognizing a handful of places and people. Even then, she was getting people’s names wrong, calling Time Turner ‘Doctor Hooves’ and Sweetie Drops ‘Bon Bon’. At first, I thought the spell just got cut off by us returning home, but I must have tried a dozen times, each time getting the same result.”
Applejack was the next one to speak. “After Twi’ tried, I took Rainbow around town to try an’ jog her memory. Brought Scootaloo to ‘er and asked if she remembered little Scoots. Poor filly, musta been mighty painful to see your friend not even recognize ya.” She stopped for a while, as if trying to gain the courage to continue. “Ah kept doing this for ‘er for about a month, jus’ hopin’ she would remember somethin’, anythin’. She saw that, but no matter how hard she tried nothin’ changed. Ah tried mah hardest, but it jus’ didn’t work…”
One by one, the ponies shared with me their attempts to restore Dashie’s memories, each attempt bringing them no closer to recovering their Rainbow Dash. All feelings of anger were gone; I begun pitying them for their loss of a friend. As their stories went on, it seemed like they ended up driving a wedge between them and Dashie. I had no idea what to say to them. What could I say? By the time Fluttershy had given up, they had all but lost hope in getting their Rainbow back. They went a whole month without any attempts to try and restore her memories. Twilight explained that she and Celestia had been discussing the matter to great lengths, looking for any possible ways to get the memories back to Dashie. As I listened to their ideas, I saw the desperation growing, the two even looking into forbidden magic to find a way to get her back to her old self. Eventually, they found it, a spell that allowed the caster to enter the mind of a pony and unlock parts of the brain. The spell had traditionally been used for interrogating ponies, being banned as it was deemed immoral, but Celestia saw it was a necessary action.
“So after we agreed that it was the only way out, I gathered every pony to get Rainbow Dash. She had spent the time away from every pony in her house, not leaving it once since we stopped trying to help her,” Twilight said, tears welling up in her eyes. “She put up a fight, saying that we were torturing her enough as it was…” I wanted to stop her from talking, not willing to bear another second of this painful story she was telling. However, part of me wanted to know what had happened after that, so I waited for her to continue. After a couple minutes, she started talking again. “We went through her head, trying to find any sign of who she once was. I don’t even know how long we spent looking, but there was nothing in the end. She had no memories of her original life, every thought and memory was of your upbringing of her. I just couldn’t stand to put her through any more pain, so I released her and asked her what she wanted. She didn’t want to stay in Equestria; she had no memories of her life there beyond the last year of us torturing her. After letting her go, we decided that we would have to return her here; it was the only right thing to do. Equestria wasn’t her home. She had kept saying it, but only then had it really sunk in. All of our actions up to that point felt justified, as we were hoping that we would be able to somehow return things to the way they should be. What we learned was that she wasn’t our Rainbow Dash that we once knew and loved; she was your daughter. She had almost no ties to the original Rainbow Dash, and we were trying to merge two different things. It took us this long to realize, we weren’t bringing her home. We were taking her from it.”
I sat there for what felt like an eternity, processing the events that were just told to me. I felt void of any emotion. I was unsure whether to hate them or pity them; both options would be completely justified. They took away my daughter, tortured her for a year, tried to force these memories into her mind, and now they want to return her to me. I felt like I was asleep, but whether it was a dream or nightmare was undetermined. The actions they had taken seemed unlike themselves, going to such desperate attempts to get their friend back. Just listening to their helplessness was painful; even the goddess was becoming desperate as time dragged on. I couldn’t bear to see them like this; it was just too horrible. These were not the same ponies that I saw on the TV show or the ones that came to my doorstep. The ones in front of me were mentally worn down, giving up their hopes of their Rainbow Dash ever returning. I had hoped Dashie was in a better place, living her life the way it was supposed to be.
I could not have been more wrong.
Chapter Three - Mutual Agreement
Thoughts swirled through my mind, attempting to figure out what had just been told to me. I was hoping that if I thought about it more it would make more sense, but all it did was fill me with a mix of anger and pity. They tortured Dashie, and had succumbed to the fact that for all intents and purposes their Rainbow Dash was dead. I wanted to hate them, but I just physically couldn’t. I wanted to comfort them for their loss, but I was finding myself unable to do that as well. I was stuck sitting on my couch looking down and thinking, trying to find a reprieve from all of this information. Eventually, I decided that the only way to overcome this was to go deeper in. Taking a breath, I looked at Celestia and asked her in a voice that was little more than a whisper:
“Wh… What happens now?”
Celestia stood up and looked at me with a calm expression, then asked me “Will you be able to continue to care for Rainbow Dash like before she left?” I responded almost immediately “Of course I can do that.” What a ridiculous question, she was practically my daughter. With my response, Celestia smiled and said “Good. We will return her to you as soon as possible.” However, her smile faded into a sorry expression. “I would like to apologize for any harm I have put you and Rainbow Dash through. It was my fault we separated you two, and it was my fault she was tortured.” I nodded, telling her “I forgive you. You were desperate, and felt what you were doing was justified. However, you might want to tell that to Dashie.” I then turned to the other ponies in the room “And I am sorry for you girls losing your friend. If there was a way to make things alright with you I would try my hardest.”
The ponies began to smile for the first time in what seemed like forever. Twilight stepped forward and said “Thank you. It’s sad that we lost Rainbow Dash, but if this is what she wants then we’re with her every step of the way. It’s what friends are for.” That last bit stung, and I was reminded that they were losing their friend while I was getting her back. However, the ponies seemed to have resigned their attempts to get their Rainbow Dash back, and genuinely wanted to make her and me happy. This brought another tear to my already stained cheeks; such generosity they displayed was rare in humans. They understood that they wouldn’t get their friend back, and they were ok with the fact that she didn’t want to stay with them anymore.
We sat together for a while, just looking down not saying anything. Eventually, Celestia began to get up again, walking towards Twilight. “Twilight, I think we need to get back to Rainbow Dash. I’m sure she will be glad to hear this news.” Nodding, Twilight looked at the other ponies, who stood up and walked to Celestia. Knowing that they were going to go, I had to make sure of a few things. “Before you guys go, can you do tell me when you’ll bring her back?” I asked, looking back and forth between Celestia and Twilight. Celestia thought for a bit, and then said “I believe a day or two. That should give you time to prepare for her, correct?” I thought for a bit, and then replied “Well, she did have a room. However you took that away when you left the first time.” Celestia gave a small smile, “I will fix that then. I believe we should leave now.” She said, motioning with her wings for the other ponies to get closer to her. Her horn began to glow with a golden aura, and a bright flash of light shone through the room.
Once the light faded, I was once again alone in this room. As I looked around, it was exactly how it was before, everything in its proper place. I then walked up to the office, where Dash’s room had once been, and was greeted with a surprise. Instead of the desk, chair and ugly ficus, there was a bed, a couple boxes of various knick knacks, and posters of different TV shows and sports teams. It looked almost like it did before Dashie left, minus a few cardboard boxes which I assumed held photos and other items that were scattered around the house. I sat down on her bed, looking out the window at the dark field surrounding my house. I was finally going to see Dashie again, after a whole year of separation.
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I awoke the next day, still lying in Dashie’s bed. I found myself resting my head at an awkward angle on top of a cardboard box, which hurt like hell the second I sat up. I wondered what time I had fallen asleep, since it looked like I had just passed out where I was. However, I couldn’t bother with figuring that out as I had to find something for my neck. I ran downstairs and into the kitchen, looking for some painkillers. The medicine cabinet had some vitamins (which tasted like ass), cough medicine (which tasted like ass), aspirin (which I would swallow before being able to taste, but I assume it also tasted like ass) and some Tums (which didn’t taste like ass, but they were a bit too chalky for my taste). Since the aspirin was the closest thing to relieve my pain, I popped the lid off and poured a few pills into my mouth. Seeing as how the pills wouldn’t count as a whole meal, I started cooking myself something to eat. Some eggs, bacon, and toast later I finally remembered that Dashie was coming home soon. I felt like I should clean up the house, but there was nothing really to clean and she wasn’t exactly the neatest mare.
I spent the next few hours watching My Little Pony. Having stopped watching it shortly after Dashie first came to me, and only briefly starting before she left, I still had a lot to catch up on. I started with season 3, with King Sombra and the Crystal Empire. I remember hearing about him from various websites as having “less screen time than Gak”, however for the life of me I couldn’t find any reference to “Gak” that the people were talking about when I looked it up. I personally thought that Sombra was an alright antagonist, especially since he wiped an entire city out of existence for 1000 years.
I was once more engrossed in the show; however I was forced to turn off my TV when I heard a knock at the door. At the present, there were two possibilities for who was knocking: Dashie and company, or one of my friends coming to pay condolences. Not wanting to get my hopes up, I expected the latter, and headed to the door. As I stepped into the hallway, the person knocked at the door again, this time a bit quicker and harder than the first time. I opened the door, and looked out at who was in front of me.
Words cannot describe the feelings I was going through. Standing in front of me was Dashie, the same way she was before she left. On her back was a simple saddlebag which seemed to be filled with a large amount of items. Her expression was a mix of happiness and pain, but the pain slowly dissipated into delight for seeing her Dad.
Before I could react properly, I was knocked over by Dashie jumping at me in a teary embrace. We both sat there in the hallway, not letting go of the moment. I could feel her tears run onto my shirt, and I felt my tears roll down into her mane as we tightened our grip. We were crying for what felt like hours, neither of us being able to say anything; everything escaping our mouths just turned into a jumbled mess.
I finally stopped crying, and pulled away from Dashie, who seemed to still be tearing up from all that had happened. I was the first one to speak, “My little Dashie… I’m so sorry…” I said, choking up at every word. She hugged me again, this time softer, and she sniffled a bit before replying. “I… I missed you Dad… I’m never leaving you again…” I chuckled, and patted her on the back, looking over her shoulder. I almost wish I hadn’t as, to my horror, I saw that we weren’t alone.
“What the hell is going on here?”
Author's Note
HOLY SHIT! I NEED A FUCKING NAME FOR THE GUY!
Also, I'd like to apologize for the last few chapters being short. Especially this one, seeing as it's a week late. However, I had to pretty much rewrite this chapter as the previous draft sucked major ass in my opinion. I'd like to say, though, that from this point on I'm gonna try and get the chapters from now on to be at least 2000 words.