The Conversion Bureau: Caught in the Middle

by no sh*t sherlock

Rating: everyone
Tags: Mayor Mare, Other, Princess Luna, Original Character, Adventure, Princess Celestia, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Human
Length: 2671

When you're doing something illegal with a lot of money involved, trouble will find you. Especially in Equestria.

When you're doing something illegal with a lot of money involved, trouble will find you. Especially in Equestria.

Based in a Conversion Bureau Universe.

Published 2012-12-17 00:10:01 UTC
Last updated 2013-01-21 06:52:08 UTC

Chapter One: Immigrant

The Conversion Bureau:

Caught

In

The

Middle

Immigrant

Six Years ago...

I stood at the bow of the mini yacht and let the warm night air wash over me. It felt amazing out here. The sea was perfectly calm, so serene. So nice that I nearly forgot my situation.

"Hey Jay." Ed called. I turned around and saw him walking up from below deck. I waved to him and he smiled. "Coast guard just cleared us and Immigration sent your papers. You're all set."

I turned and continued looking over the railing. "Great, thanks Ed." I said flatly. Edward Morrison had been a close friend of my dad's and had co-founded their multi-billion dollar software company. He was good guy and I liked him, but I just couldn't be happy at his latest news.

"You don't seem to excited." He said as he joined me at the railing.

"I don't want to live here." I said coldly, turning away from the water.. "I was fine back in the states."

Ed grabbed my shoulder and turned me back to him. "Don't kid yourself, Jay!" He said angrily. "With the stuff you do, you be dead or locked up in two month. I saved you."

Old feelings came back to me. "Maybe I wouldn't have to steal if that old bastard had left me something." I said bitterly.

Ed sighed. "Dammit, Jay, that was four years ago!"

My anger flared. "What does that matter?! He left me with nothing, Ed. Nothing at all. Rozek and Morrison has consistently made over two billion each quarter for the past sixteen years and I don't get a cent!"

Ed was silent for a moment. He looked away from me and back to the sea. "I'm sure he had his reasons."He said quietly.

"I hate him." I said quickly as I watched the water again.

Neither of us said anything for a while. We just stood at the railing. I liked Ed and I hated prolonged silences. I needed to start a different conversation.

"The name on your boat says "Triple 8"" I started. "That's the year they popped up, right?"

"Yup." He said. "1888. And since then the world's been nothing but fascinated."

We both kind of chuckled at it even though it wasn't very funny. I didn't want to live here, but there was still so much I wanted to know.

"So what's it like down there?" I asked.

"Oh its great. So peaceful." He said with a smile on face. "Like nothing I've ever seen before."

I smiled. "I guess that does sound nice."

Ed nodded. "Sure its expensive and there are some rules you have to follow,but other than that its amazing."

My smile dropped off my face and fell into the water. "How expensive?" I raised an eyebrow.

"How much do you have on you?" He asked.

I reached into my pocket and pulled out 48 dollars. "Not much." I said, embarssed.

"Hmm that'll get you about 19 Bits." He said as he reached into his own pocket. He pulled out some bills and handed them to me. "Here's 300 more, now you got around 140 something."

"Thanks, Ed." I nodded to him. "I appreciate that."

"That should hold you over until you get some more."

I looked down as something hit me "What am I going to do for money out here?"

"Oh, there's plenty of options."He said. "You could work in gem mine."

I looked at him with a flat face. "Not for me."

"Train dragons?"

"No."

"Breed dragons?"

"Hell no!"

"I've got it." He said proudly. "Fight dragons."

I sighed. "Ed, I'm serious here."

"Alright fine." He turned away "...You could work in a bureau." He said softly.

My eyes widened with interest. Conversion bureaus had gained popularity in the past couple of years. I thought the whole concept of it was pretty cool, though I could never afford it. The procedure cost over 30,000 bits. That's over $75,000 in the states. Even though I thought conversion was cool, I didn't see the point of a rich person, or anyone for that matter, going through it. I'd prefer to keep most of my rights.

"Really?" I asked. "You know if they got a Dual Result ones down there?"

"Nope, HADC is fighting against it."

I nodded. "Yup and PIER is fighting right back." I said. "But at least if I worked there I could see the rallies up close." We both laughed again.

"But no." I said. "I don't want to work there either."

Ed got quiet for a while after that. He kept opening his mouth, but then closing it again, like he didn't quite know how to say it.

"Well then I have a proposition for you." He finally said uneasily.

"Go on." I encouraged.

"The rules they enforce here... sometimes they can be hard to follow".He said looking ashamed. "Some are pretty easy, but others, not so much."

"What are the hard ones?"

"To name a few. No alcohol, no meat, no fossil fuels and no human property can be more than 10 acres.

I rolled my eye at his wealthy person problem. "Oh gosh." I said sarcastically. "Only 10 acres!"

"Yeah." Ed said with sorrow. "And perhaps you can't can't help with my land problem, but you might be able to help with the others."

"What are you asking?" I said, though I already had a good idea.

"Jay, I won't lie to you. The humans here are mostly old, rich guys who just want to live out our days in this green peaceful land." He said. "Sometimes we just want to have a drink at night or have some bacon in the morning when we wake up."

"How would I help with that?"

"There are people here, Jay, including myself, who would pay generously for items like these."

I pushed away from the railing in anger and pointed a finger at him. "You didn't bring me out here to save me" I yelled. "You brought me in to run errands for you and your friends!"

"Jay, I did save you!" Ed said loudly, matching my tone."You wouldn't have lasted back home, you know that! I just saw a way that many people could benefit."

I shook my head. "So you took me from doing crime in my own country to doing it in a foreign one?"

Ed turned away from me." It was just a suggestion. If you don't want to do it that's fine. I'll get you a dragon breeder application."

I sighed. "So get killed by a dragon or go to an Equestrian jail when I get caught." I said.

"Or just don't get caught." He said softly.

I lowered my head. I knew I could do want he wanted. Smuggling some items wouldn't be too hard for me. I just thought that maybe I could do something else when I got here. But the same mentality from the states still followed me around. I wouldn't tell Ed, but I knew I would do it.

When I admitted it to myself, I sighed again.

"Come follow me." Ed said when he heard it.

He walked to a small table and pulled a bottle of scotch and two glasses from underneath.

"Come take what could be your last drink for a while." He said as he poured. Ed held his up and when I took mine, I did the same.

"Welcome to Equestria." He said smiling. I nodded and we both downed the liquor. I turned around back to the enormous island in front of us. I could the buildings and bright lights of the city of Manehattan. There were honks and beeps from Equestrian cars and even sirens from their police.

We were maybe two miles away from a large harbor. In a couple minutes I'd be going through Customs. I took it all in and shook my as I looked to Ed again.

"Pour me another."

End Chapter 1

Author's Note

Just an idea I had. I'll explain more of the universe and how Equestria has cars, Customs, police and a Coast Guard later on. Might take a minute before I update again though. Oh and "HADC" stands for Humans Against Dual Conversion and "PIER" stands for Ponies for International Equal Rights. Dual Conversion Bureaus can make ponies into humans and vice versa.

Chapter Two: Work

Work

I looked at my watch. 10:27am, the guy was seven minutes late. This made me slightly nervous. I already didn't like when people were late. I unfolded the news paper and held it front of my face. I didn't really care what it said. The ongoing legal battle between PIER and H.A.D.C over the Dual Conversion Bureaus didn't really interest me.

I could see past how PIER looked on the outside, I knew about all the shady shit they kept hidden. They brought in huge shipments every month, usually alcohol, drugs or meat, to then resell around Equestria. The money helped fund their huge organization. Usually they resold to places like far away places like Appleoosa or even as far as Saddle Arabia, so they were no threat to me and the area that I stayed

But sometimes, like two weeks ago, they ship in something else. What the hell would an equal rights group need with Equestrian Military grade weapons? I wondered. Buts that's another reason why hardly anyone messed with them. No one wants to do a job for them when they're holding the both the money and the weapons. One might deliver something for them, then find themselves taken out so PIER wouldn't have to pay.

I was in my thoughts when I heard a voice from behind my newspaper.

"Here's your cup of warm water." a female voice said. I put down the paper to see a unicorn levitating my cup onto the table.

I smiled. "Thank you." I nodded.

"So you ready to order yet?" she asked.

I looked out the window from the booth I was sitting at. I still didn't see them. I sighed. "No not yet, but I will be soon."

She nodded and started walking away when I got a good look at her. She was kinda cute. A nice light blue mane, darker blue body. In a split second I decided to try my luck.

"But you're welcome to sit down, beautiful." I called. The entire dinner towards us, waiting for her response. I sunk down a little in my seat, maybe I'd spoken a bit too loud.

"Maybe not." She said simply and kept waling. Ah, so rejection feels the same coming from human or pony. I thought.There were a couple snickers from humans and ponies alike, but I wasn't too fazed. There were other females out there.

I sighed and folded up the paper. I took a sip of the water and looked out the window. Finally I saw what I wanted. A sleek, black Equestrian car rolled into the parking lot. It parked a couple spaces down from my van and three guys got out., a pegasus, unicorn exited the back and a regular dude squeezed out from the cramped passenger seat They all wore some type of dark suit and took a look around the parking lot. After they checked everything out, the regular guy headed for the door.

I reached down on the seat next to me and grabbed my blue and gold Wonderbolts hat. I thought it was pretty ugly, but it would attract attention like nothing else. The guy came in and looked around. I tilted my head down a little so he could see the front better.

When he did, he came to my booth and sat down. I held my watch up so he could see.

"17 minutes late." I said. "That stuffs got to stay refrigerated."

"Yeah sorry about about." He said."I think it'll be fine.

"So." I said as I took off my hat and scratched my head. "I've got what you want, but do you have what I want?

He reached into his pocket and brought out a small brown bag. "50 bits for the Pork." He said as he tossed it on the table. I opened and brushed through it as he brought out two more. "Another 100 for the chicken and 100 beef steak. All in 10 bit pieces" He tossed the other two bags.

After I felt each one, I placed my keys on the table. I picked it up by my car remote and ran my finger over a red button.

"When I push this, the back of my van will open." I said as he looked out the window. "Its the blue one."

"Alright then. "He said getting up from his seat.

"Whoa whoa whoa. There's more than that." I stopped him and he quickly say back down. "When it opens, there will be a handle on the floor. DO NOT pull it up." I said firmly. "Instead push the entire area down and slide it back. You'll see your stuff there."

The guy looked towards the van, then back at me. "And if it isn't?" I asked trying to sound hard. I had to keep myself from laughing. Guys like this always tried to intimidate me.

"It'll be there, so lets just not think about it." I said calmly.

The guy looked annoyed, but made no objections and went back outside to his guys. He conversed with them and them moved their car next to my truck. I cringed as the parked very close. I didn't need any scratches on my stuff.

They popped their trunk and stood behind my van looking at me through the window. That's when I pressed the button and they all followed my instructions. I watch the pounds of meat being transferred from my possession to theirs.

When it was all done, they got in their car and left. My job was over. I closed my trunk again and raised up my hand.

"Excuse me, miss?" I called to the pony again. "I'm ready to order now."

Chapter Three: Paycheck To Paycheck

Chapter Three: Paycheck To Paycheck

Chapter Three: Paycheck To Paycheck

Six years ago, Ed Morrison put a down on a house. Actually a more correct word would be shack. At 220 sq feet, it wasn't too much, hell, it was hardly anything, but I loved my shack anyway. I had put a lot of work and money into making look at exactly how I wanted it, inside and out. It had become a part of me. So when I'm driving home from a trade and I see an Equestrian car parked on the curb with a pony walking up to my door, I get a little suspicious.

I kept driving at just under the speed limit and watched the suited earth pony start knocking. I intended to stop and ask who he was, but then I saw what was on the side of his car. There was "FR" in fancy looking gold letters with three bags of money next to it.

I stopped looking in that direction entirely and kept driving. Filthy Rich technically owned my little shack and he was not a pony who like to be kept waiting on his money. He frequently sent associates to peoples homes to collect payments. Usually I could pay the 320 Bits a month, but this particular month happened to be the one where Equestria's national property tax was due. I barely had enough to pay the 390 bit tax let alone Mr. Rich. I'd have to get it to him when I did my next job.

But when I thought more and more about it, that was the problem. My jobs didn't pay well enough. I had carried over 100 pounds of illegal meat and had gotten less than 300 bits for it. The jobs I did for people paid shit. I could hardly make ends meet each month. My problem was clear. I needed more money.