Dawnstar

by Winged Anomaly

Rating: everyone
Tags: Princess Celestia, Twilight Sparkle, Princess Luna, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Sad
Length: 4946

One thousand years ago, two Princesses entered a room, and only one walked out. This is what really happened.

One thousand years ago, something happened in Canterlot. Two Princesses entered a room, and only one walked out again. The people were told something to keep them quiet, to keep them from talking, but it wasn't the truth... only Celestia remembers what actually happened.

Dawnstar is a much darker take on the story of the two sisters - opening with a more believable set of events that may have occurred the day Luna was banished, then following Celestia as she lives a thousand years without her sister. Unlike my other stories, it's almost completely lore compatible - it fits so well it's practically a conspiracy theory.
The only thing that doesn't click in perfectly with show lore is the conversation between Luna and Celestia at the end, but the one that took place in the show's second episode no longer made sense, so I call artistic liscence ;)

Hope you enjoy it!

Published 2012-12-15 03:30:01 UTC
Last updated 2012-12-15 03:30:01 UTC

Dawnstar

Dawnstar
Ken Atkinson

T-Minus 1001 Years

My name is Celestia. To my people, Princess. To my sister, equal. I rule during the day cycle, using my immense magical potential to shift the sun in the heavens... but when night falls, my vigil ends, and hers begins. Luna's begins. She is young, younger than I – not that that means much of anything to an Alicorn – but she rules well, even if her job is simpler than mine by an order of magnitude. The night cycle is usually empty, quiet... the occasional crisis crops up in the darkest hours, but when such things happen, she acts with sense, diligence, and precision. She rules with a firm, but kind hoof – not that there is much to rule in the time the sun hides.

My quarrel with her is not in how she does her job.

Luna has always been... ambitious. She rules all of Equestria during the night, but she has always been called to more. She has never spoken of such things, but I see it in her eyes. She wants control. She wants the day cycle. She has yet to act, yet to contest my rule or prod my boundaries, but it will happen. Soon. I am sure of it, and when it does happen... I must be ready. She is my sister, but I must not hesitate to make an example of her. Such are the duties of the vigilant. Such are the duties of a ruler.

T-Minus 1000 Years

I always knew it would happen. Knew she would grow weary of being the lesser sister. This morning, I awoke early to find one of her soldiers, prodding about in my things! Searching for letters, no doubt... letters to my men, exposing some weakness, or flaw in my defences. Something to exploit; some excuse to wrench me from the throne and install herself as the ruler of both cycles. She was foolish to even try.

“This isn't what you think, Tia,” she pleaded, her eyes cascading, “I'm worried for you! You're so cold, so distant, so paranoid...”

“I am no such thing,” I snapped. She wasn't going to worm her way out of this one. She just sobbed in reply.

“You have one chance,” I growled, “One chance to prove to me that you deserve to be spared.”

“My man was in your things so I could know you were okay,” she cried, “You've been off for years, Tia, and it's only gotten worse... this just proves it! I don't want your throne, I don't care, I just want to know my sister is alright...”

“Pitiful,” I spat, “Your lies cannot help you now! You want control of both cycles, ADMIT IT!!”

She sniffed, and looked me in the eye. Golden-armoured soldiers moved up on both sides, prepared to take her away.

“I will do no such thing,” she whispered, “Because I want no such thing. You're sick, Tia... all I wanted was to help you. All I wanted was to make you better.”

“To the dungeon, Ma'am?” one of the soldiers asked. I was about to nod, but paused. Somehow... the dungeon didn't seem like enough. One who would usurp the throne deserved more.

“No,” I said coldly, “I'm going to send her somewhere a little further.”

Luna's eyes widened with panic.

“You can't...”

“I CAN,” I roared. I turned to my soldiers, who stood at attention.

“Men, bring me the Elements of Harmony. Restrain Luna, lest she try to escape her fate.”

“This is madness, Tia,” Luna screamed as the ponies on either side of her took a firm grip of her shoulders, “These spells were designed centuries ago to banish great evils; it was magic as dark as the world around it – do you remember how hesitant you were when we banished Discord!? Banished Sombra!? They were monsters, both of them, and it needed to be done – but would you truly awaken the horror of the past yet again for callous and petty paranoia!? Answer me!!”

I remained silent. A soldier arrived moments later, bearing a painstakingly crafted box of red wood, edged with gold, and bowed as he presented it to me. My horn flared as I opened the lid with my magic, and lifted out the six Elements of Harmony.

“I don't want your throne,” she whimpered, “I never have. The night is my home, and I have always been content...”

One of the soldiers leaned in close as I lifted the Elements.

“Ma'am,” he said quietly, “Don't we need the Bearers of the Elements to wield them properly?”

“Don't be foolish,” I muttered angrily, “I'm an Alicorn. Not all the rules apply to me. Now get out of my sight and let me focus, unless you'd like to join her.”

“I'm begging you, one last time,” she said, strangely composed, “Don't do this... I love you, Tia...”

As I reached deep into myself, channelling the immense magics this spell would require, I hesitated. Was this... really necessary? I found an answer quickly. Yes, it was. Fear wasn't enough – if she wasn't gone, she would try again. This had to be done, and I had to be the one to do it.

“For what it's worth, I'm sorry,” I said quietly... and cast the spell. There was a blinding flash of light... when it cleared, where she had once stood, there was emptiness. She was banished to her beloved moon. I hoped she loved the night as much as she claimed she did.

T-Minus 980 Years

I needed a story to please the people; to convince them there was a need for this. Even if Luna only ruled during the night cycle, she was well known and liked. Unfortunately, the common pony is not particularly bright – they needed a threat that was imminent and visible. They needed her to do something so big, so terrible, that banishment became the right choice, and given what I'd caught many of my guards saying when they thought I was not listening, many believed the action was excessive. Unjustified. Wrong. No, the history books needed something special. I needed to be the hero, and she needed to be the villain – it couldn't be ambiguous for a moment. Ponies didn't just need to understand the banishment, they needed to think, “I would have done the same thing.”

Trying to take control of both cycles was strong, but it was distant, and not dramatic enough. Perhaps that could be modified? I spent long hours on my throne considering ways that the story could be altered to raise the stakes. It had to be something that would affect everypony in Equestria... then it clicked. Luna had refused to lower the moon. She had declared that the night would last forever, and with it, her rule – to stop her, I had been forced to wield the Elements of Harmony myself, and banish her to the moon. The guards that had witnessed the truth were sworn to silence and deep within my reach; they knew that nopony could know, knew what would happen to them if they spoke... the truth would go to their graves along with them at the termination of their short, miserable lives.

I turned to the closest guard.

“Summon the Archivist,” I commanded, and he bowed, before quickly leaving the chamber. It was time to change history.

T-Minus 900 Years

My altered history had taken brilliantly. The guards involved died many years ago, loyal to the end of their days, and the public believed my every word. I admit, I felt a twinge of unhappiness as various statues, paintings, and other works of art depicting my estranged sister found themselves defamed or destroyed, but she had brought this upon herself. If I chose to remember her as she was before her betrayal, I could do so privately. Let the ponies take to their streets, raise hell, and teach their children never to say her name. She had brought it upon herself.

She had brought it upon herself.

T-Minus 800 Years

Something had happened to my mane and tail – where it once had been a pale magenta, it now contained prominent streaks of blue and green. What did this mean? Did taking on Luna's role somehow affect me magically? On some level, it didn't surprise me. Sending Luna away changed... well, everything. Shifting the sun and the moon had been our duty together for longer than I could remember – many, many lifetimes. We'd even done it in the dark days when Discord ruled Equestria – it wasn't like that oaf could manage it himself. It had always felt right that we were to do what we did, but it had never occurred to me that we could be bound magically to our roles. My thoughts travelled skyward for a moment – had Luna been affected by this somehow? I shook the encroaching pity from my head. She had tried to take both cycles; she had betrayed her own sister, who she claimed to love.

Now that the anger had had much time to drain from my system, I just felt... pain. I had loved Luna dearly, and that she would do this hurt me deeply. She deserved the isolation, the loneliness, I knew she did, and I knew that I could have been the only one to confine her like that... but at the same time, somehow, I wished somepony else could've done it. Nopony should have to do something like that to somepony they care about. But I straightened my spine and 'sucked it up' as they say – she'd put me into that position all by herself, and as a ruler, you sometimes have to do things you don't find appealing. Sometimes you have to do things that nopony finds appealing.

I missed her.

T-Minus 700 Years

My job was beginning to weigh on me.

Needing to manage issues during both the day and the night cycle left me little room for rest or personal reflection, but what time I did get to think was clouded by conflicting emotions. She was so alone up there... not alone like I was alone, it would be much worse. Even if I had nopony I cared for or loved, I had my role as Princess, and I had my royal guard, with their silent, eternal loyalty. Up on the moon, there was... nothing. Nothing but the dust of a dead world. No duty to lose yourself in... nopony to confide in, or even to speak to... none of the materials needed for a passion to pass the time. How did she manage? Had she gone mad? Or did she simply... think? Think endlessly and deeply about everything that had gone wrong? Everything that she would change if she had the chance? I felt a pang of deep, resonating regret. I shouldn't have sent her to the moon. To the arctic, maybe, or somewhere else far away, but somewhere she could be retrieved...

That was when I realized. She wouldn't be thinking about what she had done wrong, like a filly sitting in the corner. She would be thinking about her hatred. Her hatred for me. She would be imagining all the horrible, terrible things she could do to me if she ever saw me again. She would remember why I banished her, but she wouldn't care. I wouldn't wish a fate that would reduce somepony to that on an enemy, much less a family member... but there had been no other option. Sending her away wouldn't have been enough. Imprisoning her wouldn't have been enough. If she wanted my throne, then if she could come back, she would try again. If she ever, somehow, came back from the moon, then... well, she would be too preoccupied with trying to destroy me to seek my throne. What had I done?

T-Minus 500 Years

I had made a terrible mistake.

She had been right.

Damn it all, she had been right...

Our reign started with an act of defiance. When we banished Discord, we had forced him aside and taken his seat of power. We had usurped HIS throne. If beginning a rule like that didn't plant the seeds of paranoia, I'm not sure what else would have. From there, I became obsessed with my rule, drunk with power... so drunk that I claimed my sister, my own sister was trying to steal my power away. I was a foolish, cowardly, paranoid, heartless, traitorous, presumptuous monster. I had damned Luna to this exile, this hatred, this madness, for what? For the security of my throne from some imagined threat? Even if she HAD been trying to take my throne and steal the day cycle, what of it!? She was my sister, the only family I had left... I lay curled in my chambers for hours the day I realized, ignoring every thump on the door and every concerned shout. I didn't understand how I could go on knowing what I had done. All I could see were the tears in my eyes when I sent her away.

In futile defence of my power, I had destroyed the only thing I cared about. All I wanted was to go back and face myself; tell myself what a fool I was, the implications of what I was doing. I wanted Luna back, for any price... if she wanted treasure, I would give her the royal reserve. If she wanted my throne, she could have it. If she wanted me dead, I would do the deed myself. But it was too late – it was all too late. There was nothing on this earth that I could do to get her back, and there was nopony to blame but myself. I pondered suicide for a short while, but chased the thought from my mind. If Luna had a hope, any hope whatsoever of returning, it lay with me... and somepony had to tend to Equestria in the meantime. If there was one thing in my mind stronger than my guilt, it was determination that this land and its people should never again fall under the thrall of a being such as Discord.

So I got on my hooves, and I walked out of my chambers. Life would go on, whether I liked it or not. At least one thing was certain – I would no longer believe my own lie.

T-Minus 300 Years

Living with the guilt was not easy, but it was... possible. It became simpler over time. I began to learn to accept what I had done – but I wasn't going to stop 'beating myself up', as my retainers told me, because the fault was mine and mine alone. The false history I had installed certainly made the story a lot more appealing, and if they knew the truth, I doubted they'd feel so sympathetic. The only reason I didn't stand before my people that very moment and tell them what had actually happened was that I feared a full-out revolt was in store. It had been centuries and generations of ponies between the event itself and now, but if the ponies of Equestria learned that I had banished my own sister to the moon to secure my own power... even if they didn't take to the streets, I doubted they would ever trust me again, and with good reason. I didn't trust myself. No, nopony could ever know... this was my burden to bear and mine alone.

T-Minus 200 Years

It took a long time, but I think I finally came to terms with what I had done. I didn't try to deny it or justify it, I accepted it. I did a bad thing. I made a bad call. I 'screwed up', as they say. My sister was suffering for it, but tearing myself apart with regret wasn't going to bring her back. For the time being, I focused my energy on running the kingdom, while in the little spare time I had, I researched magic. Mountains of ancient, dusty tomes collected in my study as I pored over each and every one, focusing on mastering my control of magic and endlessly hunting for a spell that could bring my beloved sister back to me.

After exhausting the entire royal library of magic tomes, I started to send my men abroad – no specifics, of course – their mission was simply to bring back the most obscure, ancient, and feared texts on magic that they could find, and deliver them straight to me. Some brought me books they'd found in ancient ruins, miraculously preserved by the magic they contained. Some came back with scrolls and manuscripts scratched out by magical prodigies, living deep in the woods. A few even came back with books nearly falling to dust, claiming they were about the Elements of Harmony themselves. As I immersed myself in the greatest collection of magical literature ever assembled, I quickly realized that not one of these books had what I wanted... all of them had what I wanted. I was going to need to do what had not been done in millenia and design a new spell.

Oh, dear. I was going to need help.

T-Minus 100 Years

I told them all our objective was to retrieve Luna from the moon. When they asked why, I told them it was none of their concern. I'm fairly certain they all think I've gone soft in the head, but I am their Princess, and they swore to aid me in this endeavour. Besides, what magical scholar wouldn't relish in the opportunity to delve into ancient powers and craft the first new spell in six thousand years? The objectives didn't matter, this was a groundbreaking collaboration of the greatest minds in magic, and anyone I'd invited would've been a fool to refuse. It probably helped the situation that the pay was nothing short of remarkable – only two of the fifty ponies I'd asked to join me declined, and that was because one was ill and the other was dead.

They worked for months, and when I could, I put aside matters of state to devote time to studying and experimenting with them. It was a fascinating science... more than a small amount terrifying, as ill-composed spells can maim or even kill, but fascinating nonetheless. I was thrilled when a framework was completed, and the scholars informed me that the spell could be completed without the aid of the Elements of Harmony. If necessary, I would have channelled them again... but if at all possible, I'd wanted to avoid it. By now, there were too many awful memories associated with those mysterious, form-shifting objects, memories of dark times of chaos and war – memories of mistakes made. Yes, I was more than content to let them lie.

T-Minus 50 Years

It took us nearly two decades to finish the spell. I thanked them all for their work and sent them home to their lives and families... I almost cast it at once. But that... that would have been a mistake. I remembered the many times I'd thought about Luna, about how vengeful she might have become, the insanity that probably gripped her mind after a millennium alone... when she came back, I was going to have to face her down, but I wasn't strong enough to do that. Wasn't strong enough to bear the thought of killing her in a battle to save her life. I sighed heavily as I realized what I was going to need to restore her mind to what it had been before. Yes, the Elements of Harmony. But I couldn't do it myself.

The Elements of Harmony act like an amplifier for magic, but they have an effect on the magic passing through it. The Elements of Harmony are Honesty, Kindness, Laughter, Generosity, and Loyalty, driven by the sixth core element Magic – all very positive things. When they are wielded properly, by the Bearers of the Elements – six ponies who match the traits valued by the Elements – it is very difficult to use them to amplify magic with dark intent. The positive wills of the other five ponies override the darker will of the pony using the Element of Magic, and the spell is altered to have less negative consequences as it passes through the system. But when a single Alicorn uses all six Elements, when I use the Elements, all six wills are my own... and even if I intend to do something horrible, like send my sister to the moon, they can do nothing to stop me, or soften the impact.

If it came down to a magic battle with Luna, even after all my guilt, all my regret, all my longing, I was not certain I could stop myself from killing her in defence of my own life. No, I could not face her myself. When Luna was returned to earth, I would need other ponies to face her; I needed the Bearers of the Elements... but it had been a thousand years since the royal court appointed Bearers of the Elements. I was going to need to assemble a new team, as soon as possible, and hope for the best.

T-Minus 10 Years

I have finally found a possible bearer for the Element of Magic. Her name is Twilight Sparkle. She is young, and she lacks control, but her raw magical potential is immense – possibly greater than my own. I have taken her on as my personal student, and she learns very quickly, but almost as quickly, she... grows on me. We have become very close, and sometimes she... feels a little bit like a daughter. But I must not let these feelings get in the way of her training; if she is one day destined for a battle of wills with my sister, then she needs to be prepared – needs to be ready to face down an Alicorn who may well be in a violent rage. I am confident she is capable, but I can't risk taking any chances... for both our sakes. Her training must be rigorous, and very much complete before I let her do this. Her life will depend on it. I think about telling her what I am truly preparing her for every single day, but... it seems it would be cruel, somehow, to put that kind of pressure on the filly. Perhaps I will tell her someday, but... not yet.

T-Minus 1 Year

My search for Bearers for the remaining five Elements ended when I finally sent someone to search the small, but pleasant, town of Ponyville. How had I overlooked it for so long? It stands practically in Canterlot's shadow. At any rate, there live a group of five ponies – close friends, and each an excellent example of the trait the remaining Elements desire. Once Twilight's training is complete, I'll have to try and acquaint her with them... unfortunately, 'try' is a critical element in that statement. Twilight is an extremely dedicated student and is rapidly nearing the completion of her magical training, but unfortunately, this dedication makes her... difficult to socialize with. She would immediately like these ponies if she got to know them, I know it... I'll just have to figure something out. Pulling this off depends on that.

I've set the date – this year's Summer Sun Celebration, and I've established that the location will be Ponyville. I can send Twilight to aid with the preparations in the days before... the rest is in her hooves. I hope I haven't turned her into too good a student.

T-Minus 1 Day

Mare in the Moon? 'The Stars Will Aid in Her Escape'? Eternal night? Somepony must've known – not one of my guards, it was the wrong story... but who then...? And how had they predicted the timeframe...? Some magic unfamiliar to me? How had I not found out about this during all my research, or during the spell project? It did not matter. Whoever had written that prophesy was clearly not confident my faithful student would succeed. I, however, was. I have told Twilight to shake off this discovery of hers, head to Ponyville, and make some friends. I sincerely hope this works. It has to – we won't get another shot. We fix her, and everything goes back to a simpler time... or we don't, with disastrous consequences. Perhaps the night really would last forever.

This was when I realized I could turn Twilight's curiosity to my advantage. A few modifications to the plan, and I would have no part in it – she and her friends would be the ones to save the day, and there would be no risk of exposing my manipulation to my dear student. According to the guide to prophesy Twilight found, Luna would simply 'escape' during the Summer Sun Celebration. Nopony need know that I was the one who let her out. And since she'd written me that this book mentioned that the Elements of Harmony were the only thing that could stop her, which was correct... all I needed do was have someone add one of my books – 'The Elements of Harmony, A Reference Guide' – to her library. After all, the book's information on the location of the Elements was correct. The old castle was a wreck, certainly, but that wasn't going to affect anything.

For a moment, I considered calling the whole thing off. Twilight was very dear to me, and though I had trained her well and trusted her implicitly, if she were to fail... not only would it mean her certain death, it would mean change. Destruction. Probably civil war. I only then realized how selfish this was. I was putting my student at risk – all of Equestria at risk – so I could have my sister back. And even if she was truly suffering in her celestial prison, what is the pain of two Alicorns that the whole of a nation might know peace? I closed my eyes and sighed. It would be so simple. That night, I would simply not cast the spell, and on the moon she would remain, as Twilight enjoys time with the new friends she's hopefully made and the world turns on... No. After all this work, all this pain, over the course of centuries... I was allowed a moment of selfishness.

Zero

Perhaps, in hindsight, the weakest element of the plan was releasing Luna in Ponyville without being present personally, but it had to be done or Twilight's friends would never have gotten onboard. But as I ripped through space, my body converted to pure magical energy to make the trip, I knew that my confidence in my student had been justified. She and her friends had successfully lured Luna's magically-altered alter-ego, Nightmare Moon, deep into the forest with them as they sought the Elements of Harmony, and the quaint little town remained untouched, much to my relief. So far, the plan was working. As I watched them traverse the dangers of the Everfree Forest, I was even further relieved – the path was vastly more dangerous than I would've hoped, but then again, so was the bond Twilight had formed with the other five. They helped each other through each hurdle with little more than scrapes and bruises.

Things came dangerously close to catastrophic when the six entered the old castle, and Luna followed them. I nearly panicked when I saw Luna and Twilight charging each other, preparing for a one-on-one confrontation... but Twilight managed to outsmart Luna at that turn. I cringed when I saw Luna shatter the Elements, as I knew what Twilight would think, but I knew that the Elements were beyond such simple methods of assault. Even in the time since I banished Luna, they had swapped forms many times. But then, my heart swelled as I saw Twilight begin to understand the process... and saw her stand, along with her friends, and successfully restore my sister to her former self. That was when I chose to finally return to my physical form before them.

With a brief speech, I congratulated them. I told them no lies – I had never told them any lies - but they were not ready to hear the whole truth. Not yet... maybe someday. But that was not what was in the forefront of my mind, because there, stripped of the dangerous magics she had brought into herself as she lost her mind, and even stripped of the insanity that had brought that magic forth in the first place, was my beloved and long-lost sister. As I knelt behind her, I felt none of the anger, the rage, or the disappointment I once believed with confidence I would feel were I ever to see her again... I only felt bitter, agonizing regret, and guilt for what I had done to her. My words to her were few.

“I'm sorry,” I whispered, tears in my eyes, “Can you ever forgive me?”

She met my gaze. For a moment, in her eyes, I saw everything. I saw one thousand years of loneliness and suffering - one thousand years of all-consuming hatred and anger, of dangerous magical experimentation and plotting, of tears and self-doubt... but in the end, the same as me, she had become wise through her torment. And she chose to forgive me.

“Yes,” she said quietly in reply, “I forgive you, Celestia... my big sister. I forgive you.”

The End.