Sparity and the (Un)Holy Grail

“Alright, Spike, do we have everything?” Twilight asked as she ran through her second checklist for the fourth time.

“I think so, Twilight,” Spike said, smiling as he finished setting up the last foldable table in the middle of the room. “That was the last one.”

“Great!” she beamed as she quickly checked ‘Set up Table’ off her list. “I think that’s it for moving and setting up furniture. But just to be safe…” she filled over the page of her notepad. “It never hurts to quintuple check!”

Spike groaned. “Twilight, I swear, if I have to move all these tables again…”

“But you’re so good at it!” beamed Twilight. “Ever since your last growth spurt you’ve gotten so much better at physical labour.”

“Don’t remind me,” the dragon muttered. Still it was true about his recent growth. He was now roughly the height of an average pony and twice as strong. Having two large, muscular arms definitely made him the prime choice to help with any sort of menial, physical task that was thrown at him. He still didn’t have his wings yet, but he tried to not let that get to him, even if Rainbow Dash tended to give him a hard time about it. Regardless his life was fairly good in Ponyville, if not a bit mundane. But tonight would hopefully change that.

“This is going to be the best New Luna’s Eve ever!” said Twilight as she ran over her list again, making sure that there was enough space at the bar that she had Spike construct. “Did you remember to send all the invitations to everypony?”

“Yep, did it all yesterday,” said Spike.

“Did you double check?”

“Why would I double check?”

“WHAT?!” gasped Twilight, her jaw dropping down to the floor as she rushed over the dragon’s side. “How could you not double check the checklist, Spike?!”

“Because I’m not obsessed with lists?”

“There is no excuse in Equestria for not double checking a checklist!” growled the violent violet mare. “Double check it. Now.”

“Why? I’ve got everypony in town!” argued Spike. “C’mon Twilight, this is stupid.”

“Well then, if you won’t check it then I guess I will,” said Twilight, summoning the Guest List with her magic. “More fun for me anyways! Now let’s see here… Allie Way, Amethyst, Applejack, Berry Punch, Big Mac, Blossomforth, Bonbon, Caramel, Carrot Top, Cheerilee, Colgate, Cloudchaser, Cloud Kicker, Davenport, Ditzy, Flitter, Fluttershy, Lyra, Mayor Mare, Mr. and Mrs. Cakes, Octavia, Rainbow Dash, Raindrop… Why are there so many hearts around Rarity’s name?”

“Oh that…” blushed the dragon. “I did that to make sure that I didn’t forget to invite her.”

“Well,” grinned the purple unicorn, showing the list to Spike. “You forgot to invite her, lover boy.”

Spike face grew pale. “W-what?”

“Yep, you got everypony in Ponyville—except Rarity.”

“That’s impossible!” gulped Spike, grabbing the list from Twilight’s telekinetic grab. “I would never forget to invite her Twilight, not in a million years!”

"Well you did,” she smirked. “Suddenly my list obsession doesn’t look so bad now does it?”

“This is horrible!” moaned Spike. “I have to get to invite her, the party’s in a few hours!” he said, rushing to the door out of the library.

“Hold your horses, mister!” said Twilight, surrounding the purple drake with her magical aura, stopping him dead in his tracks. “If you’re going to be heading out to town, you can run a few errands for me.”

“Like what?”

“They’re just a few things that need to be done before the party,” she said. “Consider it a punishment for not double checking your list.”

“Okay then…” muddled Spike, as he took the lists that Twilight gave him. “Check food and decorations from Pinkie… Get drinks from Applejack… Twilight, these things seem kind of important to be left at the last minute.”

“Well we were too busy checking to make sure we doubled checked the triple check of the first checklist we made to organize the third batch of checklists,” said Twilight as if she weren’t borderline insane.

“Okay, I have no idea what the heck you just said but I’m going to go do that stuff you said to do anyways,” said Spike as he quietly slipped out the door, leaving Twilight to her quizzical thought patterns and overabundance of checklists.

“Be sure to double check the checklist!”

“Okay!” he shouted. “You loony pony. Now let’s see here… Hard Apple Cider, Shirley Temples, Peppermint Schnapps, Cuba Libres, Eggnog, Champagne, Moonshine, Coconut Rum, Strawberry Margaritas… Twilight must have every liquor and cocktail known to pony on this list. Why do I get the feeling… ah, whatever makes her happy,” he said, stuffing the lists down into some of his duller and looser scales. “I have more important things to worry about, like the beautiful Rarity…”

His heart went aflutter at the very mention of her name. The two had been in a loving relationship for years, even if one of the them was unaware of said relationship. For she was the sweet, generous white unicorn that was his deepest; if still unclaimed, love. He had been trying to work up the nerve to finally confront her with his feelings for her, but to no avail. Every time he had been presented an opportunity to do so, he would become nervous and tongue-tied, unable to say the four simple words that his very being ached to say, ‘I love you Rarity’. He had said it in his sleep, he said it in his dreams, and he had even said it to the picture that he kept of her from that one summer they all went to the beach and she had worn that skimpy, yet stunning bathing suit and he took a picture saying he was going to delete it . Sadly it had just disappeared and certainly not been hidden under his mattress.

But tonight would be his night; he just knew it, for there was a tradition, a sacred tongue-caressed ritual that he would finally partake in, the New Lunar Kiss. A kiss conceived between two paramours at the very stroke of midnight. It is said that those who kiss on this magical hour are blessed to be each other’s soul mates, and would live long and happy lives together. At least, that’s how the legend goes. Spike never really considered himself a believer of myths and legends, except for zombies, that shit was real. But tonight he would throw caution to the wind. After all, what’s the worst that could happen?

He finally approached the Carousel Boutique, his secret crush’s place of residence. He gently knocked a few times on the door before it swung open.

And the mare of his dreams answered. “Well, if it isn’t my little Spikey-wikey!”

“Hi Rarity,” he sighed, goggling at the sophisticated beauty that stood before him. Everything about Rarity was well kept and dignified; a true lady befitting of royalty. Her white as snow coat must have been groomed and pampered twice daily to keep up its radiance, her purple and springy mane and tail. There was not a stray hair out of place in the remarkable piece of art that was her hair, and her eyes, the eyes that shimmered with the beauty of a thousand sapphires. Celestia herself would envy her grace and beauty as Rarity was unparalleled by any, or at least in the eyes of her admirer.

“Spike,” giggled Rarity. “You know it’s impolite to stare at a lady.”

“S-s-sorry!” stuttered Spike, shaking awake from his trance. “I didn’t mean to.”

“It’s alright, darling,” smiled Rarity. “So Spike, to what do I owe the pleasure?”

“It’s always a pleasure when I’m with you…”

“Oh, Spike, you flatter me,” the white mare said.

“Yeah…” dreamed the dragon, “I’d flatter you…”

“What was that?”

“What?”

“You muttered something Spike,” said Rarity. “I wasn’t quite able to make it out.”

“Oh… umm, I was saying… umm, dang it!”

“Dang it?”

“No! I was umm… INVITATION!” he screamed, quickly reaching into his scales and fishing out the Rarity’s invitation. “I’m here to invite you to Twilight’s New Luna’s Eve party at the library tonight!”

“Really?” hummed Rarity. “When I heard gossip of a New Luna’s Eve party at the library, I had thought somepony else had rented it out. I never thought that it was our very own Twilight throwing this year’s party.”

“Yeah, we usually go to Twi’s parents house for New Luna’s, but this year they’re vacationing in Saddle Arabia so we decided it would be fun to throw a party here in Ponyville,” said Spike, handing the white mare her invitation. “So will you come? Please?”

“Of course I’ll come Spike!” beamed Rarity. “As if you had to ask, I’m sure it’ll be a marvellous party!”

“Really? Great!” Spike cheered excitedly. “I’ll see you there then!”

“Of course Spike! Goodness me! What will I wear? Oh how terrible it would be if anypony were to see me in some old get-up. I guess I’ll just have to make a new dress! Ooo, I have just the most splendid idea! Ta-ta Spike!” she said, closing the door and running off into her studio.

Spike listened through the door as Rarity’s angelic voice eventually moved out of earshot. “Rarity,” he sighed, as he skipped away from the Boutique. “Now what else did I have to get done?” he reached back into his scaly pocket, pulling out the rest of the lists. “Should probably see how Pinkie Pie is doing.”

The dragon set off towards Sugarcube Corner, easy enough as it was located in the heart of town and not too far away from the Boutique. He opened the door as a little bell rang to make notice of his presence, but the shop seemed strangely deserted.

“Pinkie, are you here?” he called out. It was strange how quiet it was considering The Cakes had two kids and a Pinkie living there. “Hello? Seriously, where are everypony?”

“HI SPIKE!”

The dragon nearly jumped through the roof in fright. “Pinkie! Don’t sneak up on me like that!”

“Sorry Spikey!” laughed the pink mare. “But it was too much fun to resist.”

“Well I almost had a heart attack, but as long as you had fun...” droned Spike. “Anyways Twilight wants to know how everything coming along on your end?”

“Great!” grinned Pinkie, pushing Spike towards the kitchen. “Here let me show you what we’ve been working on all day!”

“P-Pinkie!” gasped Spike as he was forced into the back of the bakery. “I just needed to check up on things. I know you’ll do a—holy hayseeds that a lot of cupcakes!”

“Thanks, I know!” smiled Pinkie, looking over her handiwork. There was an ocean of multi-coloured frosted treats in the bakery, all ranging from every different colour on the spectrum, if it was a real colour or a combination of colours, chances are they were in the sea of cupcakes. “Can I cook or what?”

“This is incredible!” said Spike. “How many are there?”

“I don’t know, a pony would go crazy trying to count them all,” she said. “But you didn’t come here to talk cupcakes, did you?”

“Well actually—“

“You wanted to talk about Rarity!”

“No I didn’t!”

“Well, my P.P.S. was picking up on it anyways,” she said.

“Your what?”

“So tell me Spike, are you going to make the move on her tonight?” Pinkie smirked.

“I don’t have to tell you anything,” grumbled Spike. “It’s not really your business.”

“Just a yes or no, it’s not like I’m asking for a fully detailed game plan,” said the pink mare.

Spike sighed, looking at his pink bubbly friend. “Yeah…”

“Oooo! Spike, you dog!” giggled Pinkie, causing the dragon to blush. “Are you going to kiss her at midnight?”

“I’m going to try, but every time I try to confront her I get all guppy and can’t talk,” sighed the dragon. “What if that happens tonight?”

“Well…” wondered Pinkie Pie, suddenly getting an idea. “Let your Auntie Pinkie tell you a little secret,” she said mischievously. “Some of these cupcakes are… super special.”

“What do you mean like super special?”

“I mean…” winked Pinkie. “They’re super special.”

“Did you drug them?”

“What!? No! Maybe… a little. Yeah, a lot.”

“Which ones?”

“Not really sure…” said Pinkie. “It could be any of them really.”

“How is that supposed to be helpful?”

“Because now you know the cupcakes are ‘special’, and if you’re ever in a bind, eat one!”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” muttered Spike. “Is there anything else you need from me?”

“Nope! I can get the rest of these to the library by myself!” Pinkie said as she swept the dragon out of the kitchen and out the front door, throwing him out onto the streets. “See you later Spike! And good luck with your Rarity problem!” she called out before slamming the door closed and flipping the open sign to closed.

“Well that was weird,” mumbled Spike, dusting himself off. “Still, I’m glad she told me about the cupcakes. I guess I’ll just eat something else… unless she did something to the rest of the food as well…. Dang it Pinkie!”

The disgruntled dragon made his way out of town and towards Sweet Apple Acres. He managed to catch Applejack just as she was heading out the gate, doing her best to pull two carts filled to the brim with different liquor bottles and cans.

“Well howdy Spike!” grunted the cowpony as she tried to get both carts through the front gates. “Don’t suppose y’all want to lend a hoof?”

“How about a claw?” smiled Spike, unhooking and grabbing the extra cart.

“Much appreciated, Spike,” said Applejack as the two pulled the carts side by side. “So y’all excited for the party?”

“Of course, isn’t everypony?”

“I bet there’s a certain somepony y’all are planning to pucker with,” snickered Applejack.

“So what if there is?”

“C’mon sugar cube, everpony knows you’ve got a crush on Rarity, not sure why.”

“Because she’s the most beautiful pony that ever lived and her very existence brings joy to the world…” awed Spike.

“Wouldn’t have gone that far,” grumbled Applejack. “So you think y’all be able to confess your feelings this time?”

“I hope so,” said Spike. “If I can’t ask her out tonight, I don’t know what I’ll do.”

“Well I reckon the odds are in your favor Spike,” said the cowpony. “We’ve got enough booze here to kill a pack of elephants. If this doesn’t loosen you up then I don’t know what will.”

“Thanks,” he said. “So what about you? Any special pony you have your eye on tonight?”

“Yep, my brother.”

“WHAT?!”

“Just kidding cowboy,” laughed Applejack. “Boy, I got you better than a rattler in chicken wire.”

“Thank Celestia,” sighed Spike as they pulled up to the library. “We’re here.”

“Alright, I’ll ride these up to the back and get unloaded,” said Applejack. “You leave that second cart and make sure Twilight isn’t having another panic attack.”

“Okay, see you in a bit,” said the dragon, dropping the handle to the cart and heading inside.

“Well it’s about time!” said Twilight as Spike entered the door. “We had to start decorating without you. Did you do all the things I asked you to do?”

“Yes, master,” he said sarcastically.

“Good, did you remember to double check?”

“Umm…” gulped the dragon.

“Spike!” yelled Twilight. “It’s almost eight o’ clock! The party’s going to start soon and you haven’t gotten everything done yet!”

“Yes we do! I checked on Pinkie and I came here with Applejack with all the drinks. I even invited Rarity, still have no idea how I could forget to invite her?”

“Let me see the list,” muttered Twilight, snatching the list from Spike’s claw and reviewing them. “Huh, I guess that was all. Good work Spike, I had every confidence in you!” she smiled.

“Ya-huh,” said Spike, rolling his eyes. “I’m going to get ready, call me when everypony gets here.”

“Good idea, I should take a quick shower too. Oh Spike I’m so excited! This is going to be our first real New Luna’s Eve party!”

“And I’m sure it’ll be great,” said Spike as he walked into his room to prepare himself for a night to remember.