Regrets

by DiscoDash

Rating: everyone
Tags: Human, Sad, Other, Rainbow Dash, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 1675

Anonymous and Rainbow Dash were hanging out, until Rainbow asks a strange question. What will happen when Anonymous tells his greatest secret?

Anonymous and Rainbow Dash were hanging out, until Rainbow asks a strange question. What will happen when Anonymous tells his greatest secret?

Published 2012-12-21 23:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2012-12-21 23:50:01 UTC

Chapter 1

It’s been a while since you were thrust into this strange world. The ponies here are a peaceful race. Now, at this moment, it's mid-afternoon, you're in your living room with your good friend Rainbow Dash, You both have been passing the time drinking some Applejack Daniels: Hard Cider, telling stories when she suddenly speaks up, "Hey, Anon, we’ve been friends for a while now right?"
You nod. "Yeah, why?"
"Well, it's that I don't really know anything about you..." she says, looking to the ground.
"What do you mean? You know more about me than anyone in Ponyville," you say, wondering what she was talking about.
She takes a sip of the hard cider, as if to gather up the courage to speak. "Well, that's not what I mean... I want to know something a little bit deeper than that... I wanna know some of your secrets."
"Dash... I think you've had too much cider," you say, looking at her glass.
"Aww, come on Anon! It'll be fun!" she persists.
Letting out a sigh, you recall all the fun moments you've had with her, all the small fights, and especially all the awkward moments. Seconds have passed, but they felt more like minutes before you finally spoke up. "Fine... I'll tell you the biggest secret I have." You say, hoping you wouldn’t regret this choice.
"Really?!" she blurted out, scooting to the edge of her seat.
Raising your hand you set a rule, "On the condition that you keep your word, and tell no one what I have said here."
She nods her head rapidly in agreement. "I promise!"
You clear your throat and start talking. "Well... Let’s see... I think it would be a good idea to start with what happened before I arrived here..."
You pour some more cider into your glass, and take a long drink from it, and resume talking. "Before... Before I arrived here, I was... I was on death row."
There's a small pause before Dash speaks up. "Death... row?"
Right, it’s peaceful in this world, so they don't have that type of system here. You take a another sip of your cider, the alcohol burning down your throat, then you start explaining, "From where I come from, Earth, there's a system for punishing criminals that have done crimes that are so bad, that they have been deemed unrepentable. I... I was one of them."
The silence lasts for a long while.
"What'd you do?" she finally asks, softly, eyes darting over you, as if she was trying to read your body language.
You down the rest of the cider in your glass, and reach for more. Pouring some, you drink the glass and continue, "It was late December, about a week before Christmas... Err; Christmas is a holiday where you give gifts to friends and family members. It's like Harthswarming eve. “You said, voice nearly in a whisper.
She nods.
"Anyway, during that week, I had gotten to work. As I walked into the complex, I ran into my boss. He told me I had 20 minutes to pack my things and get out. That I was being laid-off. I had planned on using the check to help pay for my Ma's heart surgery... So you can guess what kind of mood I was in." You drink more cider, the drink fighting your urge to stop talking. "Well, I got my stuff, and left. I had to walk back to my apartment. I dropped off my stuff and laid in my bed."
"...What's this have to do with your crime...?" She asks a questioning look on her face.
You sigh, fingering your empty glass before looking up at her with red rimmed eyes. "Motive," you say in a dull voice, before continuing. "Now, a few days later, it's Christmas Eve, the day before Christmas. I was sulking around a bar, like I had been ever since I got fired. It got pretty late, and I don't really remember what happened all that well. What I do remember is standing in front of my ex-boss's house, watching it burn, and listening to the screams inside."
She lets off a half-hearted laugh, probably trying to convince herself you're lying, "You're... you're joking right?" she asks, still trying to convince herself.
You only looked into her eyes with your own, as tears pooled down your cheeks. "I wish I could take it all back, I wish that never happened..." your voice starts to crack.
You’ve never been a crying type of person, but you’ve changed. A lot has changed. You reach for the cider, but she swipes away your hand, "I... I think you've had enough..."
You look at her, and see something in her eyes, It looks like fear, and... sorrow?
"I... I don't know what to say..." She says, sullenly.
"You don't have to say anything, just let me finish up."
She nods.
Taking a long breath, and wiping the tears from your eyes, you continue. "I stood there, waiting... I stayed there until the cops came and tackled me to the ground. They said I was laughing, tears flowing down my checks. The trial was hard... I had sobered up, and like I said, had little memory of that night. I was scared witless, not knowing what was going on. It didn't help that my lawyer didn't seem to like me. The trial ended with me getting death by lethal injections.”
"Wha-"
"I don't want to explain that, so don't ask, it hurts bringing this up as is. I don't want to remember that... I will say this: as I was on the table, I was thinking of nothing... I heard the signal for the injections, and closed my eyes. Then... then I felt a gentle breeze. I opened my eyes, and saw a mane that looked like an aurora. It was flowing in the wind."
"Wait, that's not what you told us..."
"I was told to say something else... She pointed me in the direction of Ponyville and told me to walk. I had millions of questions, but only one came out of my mouth. I asked only for her name. She replied with a smile on her face, ‘Celestia,' and before I could ask anything else, she disappeared."
You look down, lost in your thoughts. You hadn't really thought much of that day, wanting to forget it. You're pulled from your thoughts when you hear her laughing. Looking at her, you ask, "Something funny?"
"Now I know you're joking!"
You glare at her, "Dash, I already said I'm not." You nearly yell it out, anger rising slightly.
"How can you NOT be joking? You just said that the princess saved you!" She said, still laughing.
"The… princess?"
"Really? You didn’t know that?" she replied with an amazed look on her face.
You shake your head, "No."
"Dude, how long have you been here?"
You think about her question for a moment before replying, "About a year?"
She practically yells out, "How have you NOT heard of her!?"
You shrug, "I don't know, nor do I really care."
She punches you in the shoulder, "Aww, come on man! Cheer up! How about we go out somewhere?" She said, trying to raise your mood, a blush on her face.
You raise an eyebrow, "Excuse me, but... did you just ask me out?" a smirk on your face.
Her face turns a darker shade of red, as she tries to form a reply, "I.. Uh... N..n.."
You cut her off, "I'd be happy to join you... Anything to get my mind off this..."
She smiles at you, and flies to the door and opens it, "Meet me at the Drunken Mare ASAP then! I have to get something!"
"Alrighty then,” you say, letting out a nervous chuckle.
You smile at her as she leaves. You get up, and close the door. Leaning against it, you slide to the ground, crying. You held out some of the details, knowing it'd surely make her run. You withheld telling her that you recalled seeing your boss and his kids running inside, burning. Neglecting to tell her that you enjoyed the sight of watching the greedy bastard burn…
You stay on the ground, crying for a while. After you snap yourself out of it, you stand. You set your mind on it. Making your way to your room, you get a few of your ties. Binding them together, you tie one to the rafters in ceiling and put your head though the makeshift noose.
"Sorry Dash, but... I'm not going to be able to make it..."
Closing your eyes, the tears resuming their flow, you step off your stool.
This isn't what hanging should feel like... It feels like you're bound to a table. You open your eyes and see you're back in the room for your execution. The time you spent in Equestria, what the hell did it mean? It couldn’t have been dream, dreams don't feel that real. You see the injections start. Before you set your head down, you swore you saw a reflection in the glass. You thought you saw the one who saved you, Celestia, with a disappointed look on her face. It seems that is what you are, one big disappointment.
Your head hits the back of the table, and you let your thoughts wander.
It was fun, Dash, you thought, if you even existed.
The final injection is pushed in, and your heart stops. You shut your eyes, feeling tired, and your breath stops. Before your brain shuts down, you hear a familiar voice call out your name, "ANON!"
"R… rain…bow…” you gasp out with the last breath you had.
Your final words. The name of the mare that you loved, hallucination or not, you could not deny that. Wishing you could take it all back, regretting every choice you made. Your brain shuts down and you die with all your regrets, and as a disappointment to the one who saved you.