The Gunslinger who saved Christmas

by Trigger_Finger

Rating: teen
Tags: Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Human, Other, Princess Luna, Adventure
Length: 30983

Jack, a human from earth, must save Christmas for Equestria

As Christmas, or whatever it's called in the MLP universe, approaches an unknown mastermind plans to stop Christmas. Jack, a human from earth, who is now part of the Equestrian special forces takes time off for the holiday but is soon thrown back into the action to stop this Christmas stealing menace.

Yeah yeah I know, someone plans to steal Christmas? How original, but it's pretty awesome because it's more along the lines of an action book rather then something like The Grinch who stole Christmas. I'm gonna try and have it done for Chrsitmas, ironic right?

Published 2012-12-21 23:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2012-12-25 12:41:10 UTC

The Chase

A layer of fresh snow coated the ground, ponies walked along the streets of Canterlot calmly. On the 2nd story balcony of a restaurant stood a human with an old style western duster coat and a black desperado hat.

“I have eyes on the target” Jack replied into his headset. “Can you confirm target?” Shining Armour replied back, Jack chuckled to himself. At least in this world it was a lot easier to depict targets then it was back on earth. “Dark Blue stallion, medium build, short brown combed mane, unicorn, cutie mark is a white cloud with rain” Jack informed Shining Armour via the headset.

There was a moment of silence, then an answer came “Apprehend the target” Shining replied and Jack walked along the balcony, following the direction the stallion was. The stallion turned a corner and Jack cursed to himself, he flipped his body over the railing and fell to the next story of the building then lept to the snowy ground and rolled to break his fall.

A mare screamed as he rolled in front of her but Jack paid no attention and raced around the corner. The stallion looked back to see Jack racing towards him and began to gallop away down the alleyway.

The stallion, known as Monty Spade, broke through the back door of a building. Jack followed him through the building, which happened to be a clothing store. As they raced into the clothing section Monty levitated out a Mk .23 and quickly fired off 3 rounds at Jack. Jack lept to the floor and slid along the tile flooring as .45 caliber rounds tore through apparel, a seemingly large amount of feathers burst into the air.

A mare screamed and Jack lept to his feet only to see the blue stallion rush through the front doors. “Shit” Jack cursed to himself as he raced towards the door. Suddenly 4 more rounds ripped through the front window of the store, the glass shattered to the ground and rounds whizzed past Jack.

Jack lept through the window that had just been shot down, only to see his target redlining it down the streets of Canterlot. Gunshots went off as Monty fired recklessly at Jack but the shots were terribly inaccurate and ricocheted of pavement and building walls.

Jack cursed to himself again and chased after Monty. Monty raced around a corner and Jack soon followed.

But just as Jack turned the corner a motorized sports carriage raced towards him. “Gah” Jack gasped as he lept up and rolled along the hood and roof of the carriage. Jack fell off the back of the carriage and landed on the hard street pavement with an ‘Oomph’. He snarled to himself as he watched the carriage race away at continuously higher speeds. He looked down the alleyway to see a larger truck like carriage and smiled.

The sports carriage ripped through the streets of Canterlot at speeds ascending 70mph. Monty looked over to his driver, “I think we lost him” Monty said with a smile. His smile turned to a frown as he saw a large road block set up by royal guard ponies. “Blow through it” Monty ordered. The driver gave him a look of concern but Monty’s mind wouldn’t be changed.

Due to the sports carriage’s aerodynamic body it was almost like a wedge and it slipped right through the road block, and as its front end hit the large combat carriages it simply flipped the carriages over and continued on.

Monty laughed, “They won’t be giving us any problems” he chuckled. The driver drifted the carriage around a corner and raced down the street. There was a taxi carriage driving at a slow pace. Monty’s driver passed him at a speed of 65mph and Monty laughed at the recklessness of their driving.

As they went to turn back into their lane a large truck carriage raced through an alleyway and T-boned the driver side of the carriage, killing the driver instantly. The sports carriage was ruined and the driver’s body had been crushed in the crash, his blood now soaked the insides of the carriage. Monty groaned to himself and his vision was blurred from the force of the impact. His vision returned and he looked to his driver, or what was left of him. “Oh shit” he swore as he kicked the door open and made for a timely getaway.

He raced down an alleyway and unholstered his Mk .23. Breathing heavily he swung the pistol back towards the carriage crash hoping for the other driver to be stupid enough to exit the vehicle.

Suddenly the door beside him burst open and Jack tackled Monty to the ground. Losing his concentration he dropped his pistol as Jack slammed him into the ground. Monty threw a heavy punch into Jack’s face then blasted him with a magical energy blast from his horn, Jack wasn’t injured but his coat now had a large burn hole in the chest.

Jack fell onto his back but used the momentum of the force to roll backwards and lept back onto his feet and got into a combat stance. Monty was a little less talented and struggled to his hooves, but as he did Jack tackled him through the door of the building behind Monty.

The door broke off from its hinges and landed beneath them, Monty gave Jack a knee to the side then head-butted him. Jack began to punch Monty in the face and broke Monty’s nose. Monty snarled and blasted Jack with another energy blast, knocking him off his body and onto his back a few feet away from his body.

Monty staggered to his hooves and began to race up the stairwell, blood from his busted nose trailing behind him. Jack cursed to himself, spinning up and landing on his feet he unholstered a Desert Eagle .50 caliber from a chest holster hidden in his duster coat. He charged up the stairs, his mighty pistol leading the way.

Monty burst through the roof doors of building and looked around only to find out he had been cornered onto this roof. “Shit” he muttered to himself as he looked to find a suitable exit but could only think of one, the stairwell.

Jack burst through the doorway of the roof. He lifted the Desert Eagle and held it in his hands as he extended his arms to full length and scanned the area for his target. Suddenly a burst of energy hit him in the side and knocked him to the ground.

He grunted as he rolled himself backwards and back onto his feet only to see Monty trying to make a timely escape. “Not this time” Jack muttered as he charged towards Monty and tackled him to the ground, Monty tried to blast him with another energy blast but Jack grabbed his head and directed the energy blast into an electric box, which burst into sparks as the blast hit it.

Monty threw a punch into Jack’s exposed throat and Jack gagged at the impact and Monty bucked his hips and knocked Jack off his body. Jack rolled sideways then spun to his feet. As he tried to line up a shot Monty threw a spin kick and knocked the pistol out of Jack’s hands.

“Let’s see how much of a badass you are without your gun” Monty laughed and got into a combat stance. Jack positioned himself in a defensive stance and waited for Monty to charge him. Monty did just that, charging at him with full force and launching energy blasts towards Jack with ineffective accuracy.

Jack effortlessly dodged the energy blasts simply by tilting his body left and right. As Monty made for a ground tackle Jack grabbed Monty by his shoulders and swung him to the side and pulled both their bodies over the side of the building roof. They fell 2 stories before crashing through the glass roof of a greenhouse.

Their bodies landed on trays of roses and the plants were crushed under their body weight. “Son of a bitch” Jack groaned as he stood up, wincing a little in pain. As he stood up and a flower pot, containing more roses, smashed against his head and broke into pieces, dirt getting into his eyes and blurring his vision.

Monty took this moment to charge Jack and try to knock him to his back. Monty charged him and tried to perform a ground tackle but despite being temporarily blinded by the dirt Jack reacted to his tackle and reversed the tackle and slammed Monty into the ground with tremendous force.

Monty gasped for air and Jack staggered around. Finding a watering hose he grabbed it and lined it up with his burning eyes. “Please don’t have fertilizer chemicals in this” Jack prayed as he flushed his eyes out with water from the hose.

Jack finished washing his eyes but as he turned a shovel slammed him square in the face. Jack stumbled back but as Monty swung again Jack grabbed the shovel by the wooden handle and tore it from Monty’s grip and tossed it away. Monty took that moment and threw multiple punches into Jack’s chest then blasted him with another energy blast.

Jack flew down the aisles of plants and slammed against a wall. He slid down the wall and slumped on the ground in pain. Monty raced towards him but just as Monty tried to curb stomp Jack’s head, Jack rolled to one side and lept to his feet. Jack preformed a roundhouse kick that dislocated Monty’s jaw.

Monty staggered back in pain and Jack charged into him and smashed both their bodies through the large glass window of the greenhouse and their bodies plummeted to the streets below. Jack arranged both their bodies midflight so that Monty would hit the ground first but unfortunately it was garbage day and there was a large pile of trash bags outside on the street which their bodies coincidently landed in.

“Figures” Jack groaned as he got up but Monty was already high tailing it down the street but he wouldn’t get far.

Monty turned and raced down an alleyway. He stopped for a brief moment and stretched his back, the fall from the greenhouse really did a number on his back. He shrugged off the pain and continued running down the alleyway. He reached the street and began to run down the street but suddenly Jack burst from a group of ponies and tackled Monty through a restaurant window, which smashed beneath them.

Jack began to pummel Monty’s face but Monty rolled their bodies so that he was on top but it didn’t last long as Jack wrapped his leg around Monty’s hindleg and rolled their bodies again. As he began to pummel Monty’s face again, Monty blasted Jack in the chest and the blast sent Jack smashing through the other front window of the restaurant.

Jack laid on the ground and groaned as a group of ponies gathered to see what the commotion was all about but Jack quickly lept to his feet and pushed through the crowd. Monty had burst through the employee section and began to make his way to the roof but Jack was hot on his tail.

Monty burst through the roof door only to find the same problem as the last building. As he turned around Jack jumped through the air and kicked him hard in the side of the head, knocking him to the ground. Monty rolled on the ground and staggered to his hooves as Jack waited for him to make a move.

Monty was breathing heavily, he had no idea how this… human could have this sort of endurance level, it was near impossible to push any-pony’s body to this extreme and then be able to continue like they had just started the fight. “Give up, it’s over” Jack said in a cool, icy like voice. The order sent chills down Monty’s back, or maybe that was simply the winter weather but either way he had shivers going down his back.

“Not even the slightest chance” Monty said his statement muffled a little due to his broken nose. He spit some blood out of his mouth. Monty charged him again but this time Jack let Monty tackle him but as Monty slammed Jack into the ground Jack rolled his body backwards and kicked Monty off his body. Monty flew through the air and crashed into an electric box, Jack spun to his feet and rushed Monty and tackled him as Monty stood up.

Monty blasted Jack with another energy blast and sent Jack spiraling backwards. Monty looked to his side and saw a conveniently placed fire axe in a fire emergency box that, for some odd reason, was on the roof. Rather than opening the box Monty threw an elbow and smashed the glass of the fire emergency box and grabbed the fire axe.

Jack stood up and saw Monty heave the fire axe back then throw it forward, the axe spun through the air, it’s deadly blade cut the air and made an iconic spin noise that you always hear in movies when someone throws a bladed weapon. Jack groaned as he leaned backwards and fell to his back, just as the axe blade missed his body by mere millimeters. Jack reached into a hip holster and unslung a .45 cal. M1911 and took aim on Monty’s chest.

The gun thundered and Canterlot was filled with the thunderous cracks of the M1911 as it spit out .45 ACP rounds. BLAM BLAM BLAM BLAM, Jack fired in a rapid succession, each round ripping a fine hole through Monty’s chest.

It was almost as if time slowed down, BLAM…BLAM…BLAM, Jack fired the remaining rounds in a seemingly slow-motion way. The slide it seemed moved at an incredibly slow pace as it ejected the spent brass casing which tumbled through the air and each round tore through Monty’s upper body. Blood splattered out in the slow motion effect as blood fluttered through the air and Monty’s body fell backwards and over the railing of the restaurant’s roof.

Time seemed to come back to regular pace and Jack reloaded his empty pistol with a fresh magazine and walked over to the edge of the roof and looked downwards, to see that Monty now laid lifeless on the alleyway path below. Jack holstered his pistol and lit a cigarette, as he took a drag from his cigarette and blew the smoke in the air he chuckled to himself “Celestia is gonna have a hissy fit about this”

Home for Christmas

Celestia’s face was beat red as she screamed “DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MUCH MONEY THAT COST, WHAT DID YOU THINK THAT IT WOULD SIMPLY GET FIXED MAGICALLY AND ALL THOSE…” Celestia continued her rant of anger as Jack lit a cigarette and took a drag but suddenly Celestia snagged it from his mouth with her magic.

Jack stood up instantly, “Hey I was smoking that” Jack retorted but Celestia crushed the cigarette with her magic. “Do you have any idea how bad smoking is for your health?” Celestia asked, rather she scolded him but hid it in a question form. Jack rubbed his forehead and groaned, “Don’t worry my new year’s resolution is to quit” Jack chuckled.

Celestia scoffed at the comment and turned to her window to look to the streets of Canterlot. It was snowing beautifully and the snow covered the street as ponies walked along, doing their Christmas shopping and what not. Celestia turned back to Jack and flopped down on her throne with a sigh of exhaustion.

“Hearth’s warming is coming up soon” Celestia informed Jack. “Uhh what?” Jack asked, rather confused, Celestia rolled her eyes and shook her head letting out a little chuckle. “Hearth’s warming, you know when the magical mare goes into every household of those who have been good this year and gives them presents” Celestia informed him.

“What like Christmas?” Jack asked and Celestia gave him a confused look. Jack sighed “It’s what we called it back on…” Jack trailed off as he thought of earth, his home and of his brothers and sisters. “Back on earth” Jack said, completing his statement, Celestia nodded.

“Yes well to any of which, do you have any plans for the holidays?” Celestia asked and Jack shrugged. “Was planning on more law enforcement duties” Jack replied, Celestia stood up and approached Jack. “Follow me, I’d like to show you something” Celestia told him and led him to a large window and pointed down into the streets. “Do you see all the ponies? How happy they are? They are all socializing and getting ready for Hearth’s warming. Wouldn’t you too like to go out for the holidays?” Celestia asked, obviously wanting to shoo him away while she cleaned up the large mess he had made in downtown Canterlot that afternoon.

“I get the weirdest feeling that you’re ashamed of me” Jack chuckled and Celestia sighed. “I’m not ashamed of you. It’s just that your actions are rather… destructive, and it takes a while to clean up after you and I’d like Canterlot to be clean and not destroyed for Hearth’s warming” Celestia told him and Jack rolled his eyes. “I’ll take that as a yes” Celestia said.

As Jack considered taking the holiday off he wondered to himself ‘what the hell am I going to do for the holidays if I’m not crime fighting?’. “Alright Celestia just one question, what will I do when I’m on holidays?” Jack asked the princess who shrugged “Do what you did back on your own planet” Celestia suggested as she led him out of the throne room.

Memories flooded Jack’s mind of when he would take leave from the military on the holidays to spend time with his family, though he never had a wife or girlfriend he didn’t mind it all that much, the military had taken up much of his time and he didn’t get out all that much. A tear rolled down Jack’s face as he remembered his brothers and sisters, how they would wait for him at the door while it snowed until the taxi dropped him off and how they’d all jump on him in joy that he was home for Christmas.

“I… I don’t think I can” Jack muttered sadly as he wiped the tears from his face. Celestia noticed this, “My sincerest apologies… I never thought about that… predicament… hmm well you could always go to Ponyville. I hear that Pinkie is throwing a party and that lots of ponies will be there, maybe it will get your mind off things” Celestia offered.

Jack considered it for a moment, he had first made residence in Ponyville before being hired by Celestia as a special forces member. He considered it a while longer and figured his old friends he met in Ponyville might be thrilled to see him, “Okay Celestia… I’ll go to Ponyville” Jack replied and began to walk away.

Celestia followed him out of the throne room but just as Jack went to open the throne room doors Celestia stopped him. “Oh Jack, one more thing” Celestia replied and Jack sighed, ‘what the hell could it be now?’ he wondered. “If you’re going to Ponyville I have a request to ask you” Celestia informed him. “Well reckoning on how I probably don’t have a choice would you mind enlightening me?” Jack asked and Celestia opened the throne room doors where the other princess stood, waiting patiently.

Jack gave a salute “Good afternoon Princess… Luna. It’s Luna right?” Jack said, having a little difficulty remembering her name, since she was usually secluding herself in her room or something along those lines. “Jack, I need to ask you if you’ll take Luna with you on your travels during the holiday” Celestia replied and Jack groaned. Luna backed away, rather saddened at his gesture. “No offence princess but I didn’t accept holiday leave just to show Luna the sights and sounds of the holidays” Jack replied.

“Don’t be rude” Celestia scolded him and Jack chuckled, “Like I said ‘No offence’” Jack said with a little humor in his voice. Luna began to step further back, her social skills were relatively bad and she didn’t quite know what to make of Jack’s gestures. “Jack listen to me, Luna is more of a recluse than you are” Celestia told him and Jack chuckled. “It’s not funny, my sister spent 1000 years on the moon alone” Celestia told him but Jack interrupted her before she could talk anymore “Yeah but you sent her there” Jack chuckled and Celestia sighed.

“It was for the best… anyway feel free to reject this offer, but please first consider it” Celestia said. Jack closed his eyes and rubbed his nose as he let out a sigh. He took his hand away from his nose and looked to the younger princess, he was about to say ‘cancel my holiday leave’ but something about her look, whether it was the look of sadness in her eyes or the way her head was drooped downwards, made him reconsider.

“Alright Celestia… I’ll do it” Jack replied rather reluctantly. The comment made Luna’s ears perk up and her face brightened. Luna pounced on Jack “We thank you Jack, your kindness shall not go unrewarded” Luna said in excitement. Jack groaned and gave Celestia a rather annoyed look, “Don’t make me regret this” Jack groaned.

Luna released her grasp from Jack and stepped back from him, her look of happiness spread all across her face. “Merry Christmas Celestia” Jack said and began to walk away but Celestia placed a hoof on his shoulder and stopped him. Jack turned around and Celestia was holding out her hoof.

“Uhm…” Jack trailed off and Celestia rolled her eyes, “For obvious reasons I have to ask you to relinquish your firearms” Celestia ordered and Jack sighed and handed her his Desert Eagle and nodded. “All of them” Celestia scolded and Jack let out another sigh as he handed her his M1911. “Now have a happy holiday” Celestia said as they left the throne room.

Jack grumbled to himself, “Time of giving my ass… god damned princess taking my guns… leaving me with her sister and no guns… stuck in a magical world of talking horses” Jack complained to himself. Luna stopped at the comments and a look of sadness returned to her face “We apologize for angering you… we shall not irritate you any longer… we hope you have a happy holiday” Luna said depressingly. Jack groaned, he didn’t want to seem like a dick and Luna didn’t seem all that bad, a little socially awkward but not that bad.

“No… I… come on, I want you to come with me” Jack said, somewhat lying but for the better good. Luna’s face brightened up again and she raced up to Jack’s side. Despite the princesses both looming over the other ponies of Equestria, both Celestia and Luna stood a little shorter than him, but just barely.

They exited the castle and Jack exhaled and he could see his breath in the cold air. Luna pranced up to a carriage that was attached to 2 royal guard Pegasus. “I’m taking a train just so you know” Jack replied and Luna quickly hoped off the carriage and followed Jack through the city of Canterlot. Several ponies starred at Jack and Luna as they walked down the streets towards the train station.

They approached the train station and walked inside the terminal building. Jack looked to Luna who looked at the terminal with curiosity. “Never seen the inside of a train terminal before?” Jack asked and Luna shook her head. “We usually are transported by carriages” Luna replied, “Who’s we? Like you and your sister?” Jack asked and Luna looked to him. “Sorry we… I meant to say I” Luna replied and Jack just shrugged and rolled his eyes.

“Well the train won’t be here for another… 20 minutes. You want a sandwich?” Jack asked as he went up to a market vendor and ordered himself a sandwich. “Please” Luna replied and Jack held up 2 fingers “Two please” Jack ordered and the vendor handed him 2 sandwiches.

Jack sat down beside Luna and handed her a sandwich which she took hold of with her magic and began to chow down on her sandwich. Jack looked at the sandwich then back to Luna, surprisingly she had just started eating her sandwich moments ago and was now wiping the crumbs of her face. Jack looked to his sandwich with disgust, since all the ponies, or most all the ponies, in Equestria were vegetarian there was no meat produce and hence he never got to eat meat since he arrived in Equestria.

He looked to Luna and handed her his sandwich. “You don’t want it?” Luna asked and Jack chuckled “You look hungrier than I am, besides if I get hungry I’ll just order another sandwich” Jack replied. Luna took the sandwich and devoured it. She gave him a rather unexpected hug, “Uhm?” Jack mumbled and Luna broke away from the hug. “We thank you for your kindness, not many ponies would have accepted our presence during the holiday, they are too frightened by us” Luna told him and Jack sighed “Yeah well… consider it like your Christmas gift or something” Jack replied as they sat and waited for the train.

* * *

The train was running 5 minutes late but that didn’t bother Jack. He led Luna to the far back of the train and sat down further away from the other train occupants. “Why must we sit so far away?” Luna asked curiously and Jack shrugged “Most ponies scream when they see guns” Jack informed her. “But we don’t have any guns” Luna replied but Jack rolled down the sleeve of his duster coat and unveiled a Colt 1875 single action.

“Celestia ordered you to relinquish all your firearms” Luna exclaimed and Jack chuckled as he loaded the revolver with a full load of six .357 magnum rounds. “I keep it handy for situations like this” Jack laughed and Luna gave him a curious look. “What kind of situations?” Luna asked curiously as Jack placed the Colt peacemaker in his hip holster.

He rolled up his pant leg revealing a custom Mossberg 500. It had a shortened 14 inch barrel and a pistol grip rather than a stock, with a 3 round tubular magazine. He unstrapped the shotgun from his leg and slung it to his chest, hidden underneath his duster coat, which was still torn up from his fight with Monty.

“You are rather disobedient” Luna told Jack who chuckled. “Oh well what could yah do?” Jack laughed and Luna sat back in her train set across from Jack “We could always have you arrested” Luna replied and Jack leaned his head back and sighed ‘This is going to be a LONGGGGG holiday’

Train Robbery

Jack awoke suddenly to the sound of gunshots. He rose out of his seat and unholstered his Colt peacemaker. He looked to Luna who was also arising from her seat, he reached over and pushed her down. “Stay down, I don’t think your sister wound approve if you came back with gunshot wounds” Jack ordered her and she knelt down.

Jack elbowed the window out from beside his seat and looked out the window to see a heard of buffalo armed with western styled weaponry: lever action 30-30s, double barrel shotguns etc. “Shit” Jack muttered as rounds began to slam into the train. He crouched down and looked down the aisle of the train, the occupants all screamed and he doubted that any of them could help him stop the train robbery, or whatever this was.

He quickly crept along the aisle towards the back of the train. As he hoped from train car to train car buffalo would try to crack shots off at him but they missed terribly.

Jack reached the back of the caboose where a .30 cal. Browning M1917 was mounted. “Well this is… convenient” Jack muttered as he cocked the machinegun and kicked the caboose door open. The buffalo that were unluckily behind the train screamed as they saw the terrifying sight of the machinegun.

Jack triggered the machinegun and it began to spit lead death out at a speed of 450 rounds per minute. Buffalo started to collapse and tumble as .30 caliber rounds tore through their bodies, the remaining buffalo behind the caboose were smart enough to move to the side and out of Jack’s line of fire.

Jack cursed to himself and removed the machinegun from its mount, strapping the ammunition box to his body and holding the gun by its front carry handle and its trigger handle. He walked out onto the back of the caboose and several buffalo screamed as they saw his presence, buffalo tried to take snap shots off at him but their firepower was soon hindered by Jack’s M1917 machinegun as he held down the trigger and let the death machine do its thing.

One of the train attendants rushed to the back of the caboose and began to fire off a Schofield model 3. As Jack continued to fire the machinegun he looked back to the train attendant. “What the hell do you think you’re doing here?” Jack yelled over the sound of the gunfire. “I’m a police officer and I’m doing my duty” the pony replied and Jack turned back to the buffalo he was blindly firing at.

One of the buffalo wised up and lit a stick of dynamite and hurled it at the caboose of the train. The stick of dynamite landed in the rear part of the caboose and Jack discarded the machinegun as he charged towards the train car in front of the caboose. “RUN, IT’S A BOMB” Jack yelled and both the officer and Jack lept towards the next train car just as the dynamite erupted and propelled their bodies even further.

Jack groaned as he got up and looked to the officer, whose body was smoking and his face was covered black with soot. “I was 2 days from retirement” he groaned then his head fell to the ground and he died, a funky jazz chorus played as the officer died. Jack rolled the pony’s eyelids shut as the jazz chorus continued.

Jack looked up to a pony playing the saxophone, “sorry” the pony replied and stopped playing the saxophone. Jack got to his feet and looked out the window, the herd of buffalo had started to ascend towards the front of the train.

Jack grumbled and he raced up the aisles of the train towards the front. As he got closer buffalos began to fire recklessly at the train in hopes of hitting Jack but to no avail. Jack lept through one final train car and looked out to see the buffalo begin to slam into the train engine. Jack raced to the front of the train car and kicked the door open. Jack stood on the train linkage and lept up and grabbed the edge of the train car roof and lifted himself up, the buffalo were too busy trying to ram the train off the rails to notice Jack.

Jack reached the roof and rolled up the other sleeve of his coat and pulled out a second Colt 1975 and loaded it up with 6 rounds as well. Wielding both his revolvers he took aim on specific buffalos and began to fire off his revolvers. Buffalos who struck by .357 magnum rounds collapsed to the ground, others that were close behind tripped over their bodies and began to make a pile ups.

The buffalos looked to the train roof and began to fire their rifles and shotguns at Jack who flopped down on the roof of the train to avoid being shot. He leaned cautiously over the edge of the train and took multiple pot shots and buffalos. They to collapsed and created more pileups. Suddenly a barrage of gunshots slammed into the train and Jack rolled to one side to avoid the incoming gunfire.

“Well I’m a little outmatched here” Jack grumbled to himself as he began to reload his revolvers. He heard one of the buffalos order something and suddenly a younger more sprightful looking buffalo hoped up and onto the train roof with a single leap. Jack looked to him with a surprised look, ‘okay this kid is good’ he thought to himself.

Jack stood up onto his feet and attempted to line up a shot on the young buffalo but he was quick and lept through the air and over Jack’s head. As he passed over Jack he gave him a kick to the head, Jack stumbled forward and due to the ice that had accumulated on the train roof he slipped and fell on his face.

Jack rolled to one side but as he did the buffalo jumped on him and began to punch him in the face. Jack brought his arms up in front of his face to block the punches and as the buffalo continued to punch he grabbed one of his hooves and threw him off the train roof.

Jack sighed to himself but suddenly the buffalo youth lept back onto the train roof and threw a heavy kick at Jack. Jack blocked the kick with one arm then punched with his opposite fist, hitting the buffalo in the gut and knocking the wind out of him. The buffalo staggered back but managed to keep his footing despite the icy conditions. “You’re good kid” Jack grumbled and the kid lept through the air for another jump kick but Jack grabbed his hindleg and flipped him over his head and slammed him into the roof of the train.

Jack stepped back and almost slipped on the ice but managed to keep his own footing. The buffalo spun to his hooves and somehow managed to do so with great balance control. “Just give up kid I don’t want to” Jack began but the buffalo charged and at the last possible second leaned back and slid into Jack, tripping him and making him loose his footing.

“Shit” Jack yelled as he slid off the train but caught himself by an edge rail, he looked into the train to see a mare covering her baby foal, the foal waved to Jack and jack waved back. “Wait why haven’t the buffalo shot me?” Jack asked outloud and looked behind him to see the buffalo running away from the train.

“Maybe they gave up” Jack said with a boost of confidence but as he looked forward to the train engine he saw that the buffalo were leaving because the train was about to head through a tunnel.

“SHIT” Jack yelled as he attempted to get back on top of the train car but the young buffalo slid down and began to stomp on Jack’s fingers. “You little shit I…” Jack began but then realized he didn’t have time to argue, he had to escape “MacGyver time”.

The buffalo looked to the train tunnel and laid down, leaving Jack to his fate. The train entered the tunnel and exited the tunnel a few moments later. The buffalo peaked over the edge to see that Jack wasn’t holding on to the train car anymore, most likely he was killed when the train past into the tunnel.

Suddenly a kick slammed into the side of the buffalo and he slide along the roof of the train car. The young buffalo looked up to see Jack standing there before him. “How did you…” the buffalo gasped but Jack simply shrugged.

Moments earlier:

Jack looked to the tunnel then back to the buffalo, he pushed himself back then as he came forward he booted the window of the train in and swung himself into the train. The train car passed into the tunnel just as he swung into the train. He looked to the mare and her foal and made the gesture to tip his hat but realized he wasn’t wearing it.

He turned around to see a very young colt, probably the age of 5 with his hat on. The hat was obviously too large for him but Jack chuckled and tipped the hat up so the colt could see better. “Merry Christmas” Jack quoted, leaving the colt with his desperado hat and ran to the back of the train car and as the train left the tunnel he lept onto the roof. The buffalo was peering over the side of the train, probably thinking he was dead.

Jack charged forward and threw a mighty kick into the buffalo’s side and he skidded along the roof of the train, the buffalo looked to him “How did you…” the buffalo tailed off and spun himself up again.

Jack readied himself in a defensive stance and the buffalo charged at him again.

The 2 began to fight in a hoof-to-hand fight, the buffalo started by slamming multiple quick jabs into Jack and Jack paced back, keeping his balance on the icy rooftop. Jack threw a heavy punch across the buffalo’s jaw which knocked him to the train top and he spun himself back up.

The buffalo paced back but then lept forward and kicked Jack heavily in the chest, sending him flying through the air and he landed on another train car’s roof.

The buffalo lept through the air and attempted to land a slamming punch into Jack but he rolled his body backwards and flipped into the air, landing on his feet and looking towards the buffalo. Jack rose to his full height but as he did the buffalo charged at him, Jack front flipped over him as he charged and landed on his feet. As the buffalo turned to him Jack spun and threw a heavy haymaker punch and knocked the buffalo to his back.

The buffalo kicked out one of his hindlegs and tripped Jack, who fell and landed just inches from the edge of the train. The buffalo lept on top of him and held his head off the edge off the train.

Jack looked off towards the distance and saw another tunnel approaching. “Why are there so many goddamned train tunnels” Jack yelled out and began to struggle with the buffalo. The other buffalo had simply been watching rather than shooting, whether it was for entertainment or so they didn’t shoot their comrade. As the train tunnel grew ever closer Jack mustered a large amount of strength and slammed a punch into the buffalo’s side, he gasped and his grip lightened from Jack’s body.

Jack swung his body and he once again missed the train tunnel by mere inches. He sighed to himself. “There’s too many fucking train tunnels” he muttered but suddenly the buffalo grabbed Jack and pushed his body upwards, his duster coat began to shred against the cement tunnel walls. Jack threw an elbow into the buffalo’s chest and the youth yelped as he released his force on Jack and grabbed for his sore chest.

The train exited the tunnel and Jack lept up and began to race for the back of the train and the buffalo chased after him. As jack reached the back of the train the buffalo sneered “I’ve got you now”.

But just as the buffalo charged for the kill shot Jack lept into the air, time once again seemed to slow as Jack began to perform a backflip over the buffalo as he passed by underneath him. Time seemed to travel at an incredibly slow pace as Jack pulled the Mossberg 500 out from his duster coat, and holding the shotgun with one hand, he pointed the shotgun towards the youth and pulled the trigger back.

The shotgun let out a terrifying, BOOM, and 00 buckshot propelled out the barrel of the shotgun. At this range it wouldn’t matter if you were an Ursa major, shotguns at point blank were simply lethal. The buckshot tore through the buffalo’s body, ripping through his back and bursting out the front of his chest. Blood spurted from his chest wound as he gagged and collapsed onto the roof of the train.

The blood that now leaked from his body acted as extra lubrication and his body slid off the slippery roof of the train. Time returned to a normal pace and Jack pulled out a cigarette and lit it. The buffalo saw their young comrade fall and all retreated from the train to retrieve his body, leaving the train alone for the time being.

Jack pumped the shotgun and removed the shell from the chamber to make it safer to carry around with him. He slung the shotgun back underneath his duster coat and smiled as he took another drag from his cigarette and let the cool night breeze blow through his hair as the train continued on towards its destination.

Cold train ride

Jack returned to his seat across from Luna and flopped himself down and let out an exhausted sigh. “What happened?” Luna asked curiously, looking at Jack with a slight bit of curiosity. Jack chuckled, “We had a slight disagreement over politics” Jack informed her. Luna scrunched her nose “Ohh… well it seems more like you had a large disagreement” Luna replied and Jack chuckled “Don’t worry, they promised to vote for you in the next election” Jack joked humoressly.

Luna didn’t quite go along with the joke and curled up and shivered a little. Jack sighed and removed his duster coat and placed it over top of Luna. “What are you doing?” Luna asked and Jack rolled his eyes. “I’m trying to suffocate you” Jack joked sarcastically but Luna didn’t quite understand the joke and her head perked up with a look of worry. Jack hit himself in the forehead at her inability to understand sarcasm.

“I’m joking… chill” Jack replied and she curled up again. “Yes we are very cold” Luna replied and Jack groaned ‘Why do I have to be stuck with a princess that doesn’t understand modern language?’ Jack asked himself as he tucked his duster coat around Luna. “What about you? Won’t you be cold?” Luna asked and Jack shrugged and sat down by himself in the seat across from her. Luna got up and sat beside him, “Here, take half, we can share the warmth” she offered.

Jack held her back “No, no, no… you just… stay over there. I’ll be fine sitting here alone… just…” Jack stuttered as he tried to keep the princess from doing anything else that was rather absurd.

“We apologize for our… wanting to help?” Luna apologized, a little confused by the way Jack pushed her away. “Don’t sweat it, it’s just I don’t really feel like sharing the warmth” Jack said and shuddered at his own comment. “You’re very generous but always remember that you need to take care of yourself as well” Luna replied as she cuddled up on the seat across from his.

Jack grumbled to himself as he leaned his head up against the cold window, the window in front of him was broken from the gunfight and cold air now blew in his face and sent shivers down his back. Jack grunted to himself in discomfort and tried to get some sleep as the train continued on down the tracks.

* * *

Jack awoke as a sudden cold breeze brushed past him and sent shivers down his back. For some reason he felt warmer than he had when he passed out. As he went to get up he felt extra weight on his body and looked down to see Luna nestled up against him. ‘What the hell is she doing?’ Jack thought to himself as he tried to wake Luna up.

He gave her a gentle nudge, “Hey kid… wake up” he whispered but to no avail, she was either in deep sleep or she was faking. He grumbled to himself and Luna rustled a little and rearranged herself and continued sleeping, Jack sighed as his legs began to feel numb. He body weight had cut the circulation off from his legs and they were feeling tingly.

He lifted her body up off his legs and set her down beside him. He grunted as he stood up and began to walk down the aisle to stretch his legs. He walked to the back of the train and stood on the edge of train and took a deep breath and he could see his breath.

Shivers went down his spine and he figured it was time to head back inside and try to get some more sleep. As he was about to sit down he noticed Luna restlessly tossing and turning. “Okay, obviously you’re faking, knock it off” Jack told her but she didn’t listen and a small smile crept up on her lips, and she let out a quiet groan of discomfort.

Jack looked to the empty seat across from her and sat down, he wasn’t going to give into her stupid games or whatever the hell she was doing. He leaned his head against the window but kept his eyes slightly open and within a minute Luna perked her head up and looked to Jack. She let out a sigh of sadness and cuddled up against the cold wall of the train.
She looked up to the moon and a tear trickled down her face as she watched the beautiful moon which she had brought

up earlier that night. She set her head down on her hooves and began to fall asleep sadly. Jack cursed himself, somewhere deep down inside he felt sorry for the princess, though he didn’t quite know why.

He grumbled to himself as he got up and sat down beside Luna. As soon as Luna felt Jack’s body presence her head perked up and she looked to his face with a curios look. “I knew you were faking” Jack muttered and she let out a small giggle as she nestled her head up against his chest.

Jack let out a groan, “Do you have to be so… affectionate?” Jack asked with irritation in his voice and Luna looked up to him. “If you didn’t care for our well-being then why did you come over to comfort us?” Luna asked and Jack simply rolled his eyes. “Yeah well I guess I have a soft spot for lonely ponies on cold winter nights” Jack muttered and Luna rested her head on his lap and began to sleep.

Jack grumbled to himself as Luna slept peacefully on his lap. He leaned his head back and was about to try and sleep when he remembered that the last time Luna had decided to fall asleep on his lap that she cut the circulation off in his legs.

He tilted his head forward and slid his right hand under her neck and cradled her head in his arm like a newborn baby, though it looked absolutely ridiculous and he hoped that no paparazzi got a photo of this, it was a little more comfortable than her sleeping on his lap. He stroked his left hand through her mane and she cuddled up against his chest, “God I despise myself right now’ Jack thought to himself as the train continued on.

Luna was sleeping peacefully as Jack cradled her in his arms and stroked her mane, it was incredibly soft and almost felt like a silky substance. Strangely enough it was like her mane had a translucent appearance and someone could almost see right through her mane. Jack started to hum a Christmas carol to himself (12 days of Christmas) as he sat there with Luna resting in his arms.

Jack thought to himself as he stroked Luna’s silky mane, ‘she’s kind of cute, in a weird sort of way’. “Well at least she doesn’t drool” Jack muttered to himself.

The train continued on, a large fume of black smoke coming out of the train engine’s chimney. The lone headlight on the train pierced the darkness of the night and snow was falling from the sky. It was truly a beautiful night.

* * *

Jack had barely gotten any sleep but that didn’t faze him. The train finally came to a stop and the engine whistle blew. “Hey kid… wake up” Jack told Luna as he gave her a gentle nudge. Luna awoke and rubbed her eyes and looked up at Jack with tired eyes., “We’re at our destination” Jack informed her and looked at his watch. “It’s 3am” Jack muttered and Luna rolled off Jack and handed him his duster coat.

A wailing siren caught Jack’s attention and he looked out the train car window to see a police carriage race past towards the center of town. Jack stood up and grabbed his duster coat and flung it over his body. “We thank you for your company” Luna began but Jack ignored her and raced off the train.

Luna looked out the window, then to Jack and raced after him. Jack ran up to a mare with a very light aquamarine fur coat and the cutie mark of a golden lyre. “Hey Lyra” Jack called out and Lyra looked over to him with stunned eyes. “I shouldn’t be surprised that you’d show up now of all times” Lyra said in a frantic voice.

“Lyra what the hell is going on?” Jack asked, rather worried at the sight of all the police carriages that passed by. “Some idiot is holding a bunch of ponies hostage on the roof of the town hall” Lyra informed Jack and with that she galloped away frantically. “Where the hell are you going?” Jack asked and Lyra turned back to him “Well duh, I’m going to see what happens”

The hold-up

The police chief held up his megaphone “Lay down your weapons and surrender” the police chief ordered. A faint voice could be heard, “Hey copper, I got your present right here” he yelled out and suddenly a barrage of auto fire erupted and bullets began slamming into police carriages, smashing their windows and destroying the sirens.

“SHIT” the police chief screamed as he ducked behind his police carriage. Several officers were shot by the barrage and fell to the ground, 2 were dead and the rest groaned in pain. “Have a happy holiday” the voice from the roof yelled and the figure tossed a young foal off the roof.

“SHIT” the police chief roared but suddenly a blitz of rainbow flashed by and caught the young foal. The police chief sighed in relief as Rainbow Dash zipped past the wall of police carriages and brought the foal to safety.

An acoustic guitar solo played and a set of legs began to walk across the roofs of all the carriages. The guitar played a D-minor as the figure stepped down onto the hood of a police cruiser and trotted onto the ground, his spurred leather boots packed the snow beneath his feet. The guitar solo continued and the figure puffed on a cigarette and looked to the town hall with a stone cold face.

He dropped the cigarette to the ground and stomped it out. The guitar continued its note and Jack looked over to the pony playing the guitar, which happened to be the same one who had played the saxophone on the train ride. “Do you mind?” Jack asked with irritation in his voice.

“Oh sorry” the pony replied and stopped playing the guitar solo. The police chief looked over to Jack as he started walking towards town hall. “PAULSONNNNNNN” the chief roared and began to chase after him, sputtering a jumble of angry retorts that literally made no sense.

“Listen, if you go in there I’m calling the princess” the police chief yelled. Jack pulled out a cell phone and tossed it over his shoulders, the police chief caught it in his front hooves and looked at the cell phone. “She’s on speed-dial, oh and Haggard? Tell her I said hi” Jack chuckled and continued on.

Mayor Mare raced over to Jack as he continued walking towards town hall. “Listen Jack I know that as Mayor you don’t really like me because I’m with the politics but this is the co-executive chief of the royal guard” Mayor Mare informed Jack and a fat, plump stallion stood in his way. “Jack I’m ordering you not to go in there, if you do go in there will be severe” he began but Jack punched him in the face and the force knocked him to the ground.

“When Celestia gets here call me” Jack replied and continued walking towards the town hall building. Luna trotted up behind him, “What are you going to do?” Luna asked and Jack chuckled, “I’m going to say please” Jack replied.

Haggard got on his walkie-talkie and radioed to the police pony at the door, “Paulson is trying to get in, don’t let him enter goddammit” Haggard yelled into the walkie-talkie. The pony at the door was a large brute-like pony, his muscles bulged and he smiled “Yeah no problem” he replied. Though his wings were tiny and his fur was a snowy white his gigantic bulging muscles more than made up for the small problems.

Jack walked up and Snowflake turned around but had to look up to see Jack standing in front of him and gulped. “Hey Snowflake, long time no see” Jack replied and Snowflake stood to his full height to try and be more intimidating but still stood a full 2 feet shorter than Jack.

“Hey Snowflake” Luna called out and Snowflake redirected his attention to Luna just as she gave him a mighty buck with her hindlegs. Snowflake’s body flew back and slammed against the wall. Jack looked to Luna with a surprised look, “Believe me, we won’t get in as much trouble as you would” Luna replied and went to open the door.

As she opened the door Jack gasped and pulled her back and swung her body behind a wall. Gunfire erupted and bullets flew past where they had both recently been standing. “I appreciate the help but I think Celestia would kill me if you got shot” Jack told her and pulled out his revolvers as he swung his body back into the doorway.

He cocked back the hammers back and began firing the revolvers at any of the ponies that were stupid enough to stand in the open. The ponies, whether they were here to rob the place or for whatever reason, were armed with G3 assault rifles and 2 seconds after Jack began shooting them down they returned fire but were stupid enough to just stand in the open.

Jack swung his body behind the wall as auto fire ripped through the air. “Shit, outgunned again… to bad this place doesn’t have a conveniently placed Gatling gun or something” Jack muttered and reloaded his revolvers. He waited for the ponies inside to stop firing.

They were foolish enough to all fire at the same time and shoot until their ammunition was depleted. Jack swung his body back into the doorway and fired both his revolvers at the remaining ponies.

They screamed, their bodies twisted and turned as .357 magnum rounds tore through their bodies and took their life from them.

Within seconds it was over. Jack stood there in the doorway, a lone silhouette, his arms extended and a smoking six shooter in each hand. He brought the guns up to his face and blew the smoke out of the barrels then began to spin the revolvers on his index fingers and holstered both revolvers.

Suddenly he saw movement on the balcony of the second floor of the building. “What the fu” was all Jack managed before the entire building lit up, a crank operated Gatling gun began to spit out .30 caliber rounds and Jack lept behind a stack of metal crates.

“Fuck it, I take it back, no conveniently placed machinegun” Jack yelled and the machinegun continuously tore away at the crates. Jack crawled along the ground doing his best not to be spotted and peeked around the corner of one of the crates to see that the pony operating the machinegun was simply firing blindly at the metal crates.

Jack quickly shuffled across the floor and rolled into an office without being noticed. Jack groaned to himself and crawled along the ground and out the second door of the office which led to another.

He continued going office to office until he reached the last office and looked up to the machine gunner who was still stupidly firing at the metal crates. Jack eased the door open silently and crept up along the staircase towards the balcony.

He crept up behind the machine gunner silently and unslung his Mossberg. He cocked the shotgun and the machine gunner froze and stopped cranking the machinegun. Jack pulled the trigger on the shotgun and the machine gunner’s body was devastated by the blast. 00 buckshot tore through his body and propelled his body over the edge of the balcony, his body fell to the ground below with a thud and blood began to pool around his body.

Jack looked towards the staircase that led to the roof and began to race up the stairs.

The door to the roof got booted open and several ponies screamed in fear as Jack entered onto the snowy roof. A pony with a long blue overcoat turned to Jack, he was holding Scootaloo by the chest and had the blade of a machete to her throat.

“Morning” Jack said in a cold voice. “Oh, but what have we here? Another police officer sent to arrest me?” the crazed criminal laughed and Jack snarled. “The name’s Jack” Jack told him and the criminal sneered, “Well Jack I hate to have to waste time with introductions so I’ll keep it brief, the name’s Slicer, now die” Slicer laughed and threw a driving knife at Jack with deadly accuracy.

Jack lept back and fell to the ground, the knife missed him by a mere fraction of an inch. Jack rolled up to his feet unholstered his Colt peacemaker. “They call it a peacemaker because it makes peace” Jack snarled and Slicer laughed. “You know, I promised Scootaloo here that she could watch me kill Rainbow Dash… but I think I’ll have to disappoint her and just kill you” Slicer said.

“Now lower the gun… or the filly gets it” Slicer said in a completely insane voice. Jack crouched down and placed his revolver on the snowy roof. “There I’m unarmed… now stop this madness” Jack ordered him but Slicer laughed. “Please don’t make me laugh, I know you have another revolver and that shotgun” Slicer sneered and Jack snarled and unholstered his revolver, dropping it to the ground then unslung his shotgun and dropped it to the ground as well.

“That’s it, I have no more weapons” Jack replied and Slicer pondered a thought for a moment. “Alright Jack, get on your knees and place your hands behind your head” Slicer laughed. Jack got down on his knees and placed his hands behind his head.

“See how it feels to be on the other side of the law?” Slicer laughed. Jack began to slide his right hand up the opposite coat sleeve. “This isn’t what it feels like to be on the wrong side of the law” Jack told him and Slicer let out a small chuckled and his mouth had a smile spread across it.

“Jack, don’t tell me what it feels like, I was in prison for 15 years… I know what it feels like to be on the wrong side of the law” Slicer said, insanity in his voice. “If you were on the wrong side of the law then how are you still alive?” Jack asked as he slid his hand further up his sleeve. “Jack… I’m alive because no-pony in prison had the guts to come after me. Yeah that’s how I survived” Slicer said as he began to chuckle.

“No, what I meant was you don’t know what it’s like to be on the wrong side of the law because if you ever had been then you’d be dead” Jack told him with a cold look. “Jack, the reason they caught me was because they surrounded me with an entire platoon of armed soldiers, they wouldn’t have caught me any other way” Slicer laughed and Jack looked to him.

“You want to know what it truly feels like to be on the wrong side of the law” Jack told him and Slicer’s eyes widened as he realized what Jack’s statement had meant. Jack grabbed the handle on the Desert Eagle .50 cal. that was hidden in the upper arm of his coat and ripped it out of the coat as Slicer tried to throw another knife at Jack.

But Jack was faster, lining up a shot on Slicer and pulling the trigger only once. The massive handgun boomed in his and a single .50 cal. round burst from the muzzle of the gun and slammed into Slicer’s shoulder. It blew away a large chunk of his shoulder and Slicer gasped, blood spewed out of his mouth as the devastation of the bullet ripped apart arteries in his neck.

“That’s what the wrong side of the law feels like” Jack quoted. As Slicer fell backwards over the edge of the roof his grip on Scootaloo tightened and she was pulled over the edge along with him. “SHIT” Jack yelled as he lept up and jumped over the edge of the roof and slid down the angled roof. The ice sped up his pace and he fell of the very edge of the roof slant.

Grabbing Scootaloo by her front hoof with one hand and the roof’s edge with his other hand he dangled there. His arm throbbed as their combined weight stressed out his muscles to the max. Actually Scootaloo only weighed around 90 pounds but Jack was 230 pounds, and the fact that he was holding them up with his left arm made it even harder. Slicer fell with a gurgling scream and splattered against the hard ground below.

“Luna I take back what I said earlier… HELP ME” Jack yelled out as his grip on Scootaloo’s hoof began to slip. Luna rushed out from the town hall and looked up at them. He tossed Scootaloo up and grabbed her around the waist so he wouldn’t drop her.

Luna flew up and tried to get underneath Jack. “No, get the kid” Jack ordered and Luna looked up to Jack, “But what about you?” Luna asked with worry in her eyes. “Just trust me, I’ll be fine” Jack told her and Luna flew up beside Jack and took Scootaloo from his grasp and fluttered back down to the ground, bringing Scootaloo away to safety.

Jack grunted to himself as he grabbed the edge of the roof with his other hand and launched himself up onto the roof. However due to the ice that had accumulated over the past few days the slant to the roof was impossibly slippery and was ridiculously difficult to get a grip on and Jack slid back off the roof.

He tried to grab the edge of the roof but missed the edge by a fraction of a second. “OH SHIIIITTTTTT” Jack yelled as he plummeted down 4 stories downwards and his body slammed into a police cruiser’s roof. Glass from the windshield shattered as Jack’s body made a huge indent in the roof of the carriage.

“JAAACCKKK” Luna screamed and she rushed over to the motionless Jack.

The party

The falling snow had begun to coat over Jack’s body as Luna rushed to his side. She felt for a pulse but couldn’t feel one. “No… Jack don’t you die on us” Luna cried as she began to shake him, obviously never hearing of CPR. Luna pulled Jack off the carriage and laid him on the snowy ground, “Jack, you can’t be dead… you haven’t shown us the holidays” Luna cried as she tried furiously to shake him back to life.

Jack didn’t move, Luna rested her head on Jack’s chest and began to sob. Jack groaned and put a hand on her shoulder, “You know that you’re really annoying when you cry?” Jack chuckled painfully and Luna looked towards his face. Tears still ran down Luna’s face as she looked Jack in the eyes. Jack shivered “And your tears are really cold” Jack said as he stood up.

“You’re… alive, but why didn’t you answer us when we tried to wake you” Luna asked through her sniffles. Jack stretched his back and chuckled “Figured I’d have to get you back for the train ride” Jack laughed and walked towards the line of police carriages. Haggard ran up and began sputtering angry phrases. “Got dammit Jack, that was irresponsible. Ponies could have died, goddammit Jack are you even listening to me, JACK!” Haggard yelled and Jack walked past him, Jack stopped for a moment and looked back to Haggard “Tell it to Celestia”.

With that he walked off into the crowd that had formulated to watch the commotion. He began to walk through the crowd but suddenly an erratically jumping pink mare bounced in front of him. Jack’s head bobbed up and down as he tried to keep his line of sight on the pink mare. “Hey Jack, guess what I’m having a party! Want to join, you’re invited of course, here’s you invitation. Oh boy when I heard that some bad stuff was going on and that some guy was totally saving the day I knew it was you and” Pinkie continued on her rant as Jack looked at the invitation.

“Yeah, thanks Pinkie I’ll make sure to drop by” Jack replied and Pinkie stopped her rant. “Okay seeya, oh hi Princess Luna! if you want to join the party you can to” Pinkie told the princess and with that she zipped away. Jack looked at the invitation, December 23rd at Sugarcube corner. “Oh shit that’s tonight” Jack muttered and began to pace away when suddenly Rarity stepped in front of him.

“Oh dearest Jack… it’s so good to see you again” Rarity said in a rather royalty like voice. Jack sighed “Okay I’ll bite what do you want?” Jack replied and Rarity was taken back by the comment. “What in Celestia’s name… Jack I simply wanted to say hi, you really don’t think I’d want something from you when you just got back” Rarity gasped.

“Well considering you were probably sleeping and heard about the commotion and thought you’d see it tomorrow on the papers, then you heard that there was a human law bringer and you thought ‘oh I really need him to try on a dress that I was making’” Jack replied and Rarity sighed. “Okay you win… Yes I’d like you to try on a new suit I’ve been designing” Rarity said and looked to his tattered duster, “And by the looks of things you need some new threads” Rarity said and whirled around and began to trot back to her boutique.

She stopped and looked back to Jack, “Well are you coming or not?” Rarity asked and Jack sighed and turned to Luna. “This won’t take long” Jack told her and she nodded, “Please do not worry, we need to lower the moon soon so that our sister may raise the sun” Luna replied and Jack followed Rarity, with Luna following him closely.

They finally arrived at the boutique and Jack flopped himself down on Rarity’s panic couch. “Hey… get up, I need you to try these on” Rarity ordered as she levitated out a custom crafted: black jacket suit, black dress pants, a white dress shirt, black tie and some beautiful made black dress shoes.

“Who am I dressing up as? James Bond?” Jack asked sarcastically, “Who is this James Bond you speak of dearie?” Rarity asked and Jack rolled his eyes and grabbed the suit. Luna tapped him on the shoulder and Jack turned to her “Pardon us for a moment, we must go lower the moon” Luna told him and Jack shrugged. Luna trotted off and Rarity watched Jack patiently.

“Well go ahead try it on” Rarity offered and Jack looked at her with a blunt expression. “What? Don’t you like the suit?” Rarity asked and Jack motioned for her to look away. “Oh right… you humans and your… morals” Rarity laughed and turned around as Jack undressed.

His duster coat dropped to the ground with a THUD, several handguns and revolvers hidden in the coat. He took of his trousers revealing a sawn off double barrel strapped to his left leg and as he removed his boots he untethered a bowie knife off his ankle sheath. He slipped on his suit and grunted to himself.

Rarity turned around and gasped, “Oh darling you look absolutely breathtaking” Rarity commented and Jack tried to fit himself a little more comfortably into the suit but it was a little tight, like suits were supposed to be. ‘How the hell did 007 always do those action stunts in a suit like this?’ Jack thought to himself.

Rarity looked to the cluster of run down clothes and levitated them up, “Darling I promise to have your clothes fixed up for the party this afternoon, but until then you’ll have to wear those… please don’t scuff them up too much” Rarity said and was about to depart when Jack rushed up. “Wait” Jack called out and Rarity stopped. Jack rummaged through his duster coat and pulled out a Walther PPK and 2 extra magazines.

He grabbed a shoulder holster and concealed it inside the suit. “If I gotta look like 007, I might as well be 007” Jack chuckled and Rarity rolled her eyes at the comment, not having any idea what he was taking about.

Jack chuckled to himself as he left the boutique and started humming the 007 theme song. Luna had lowered the moon and the sun had begun to rise, Jack looked to his watch ‘5:39am’ and as he looked at the watch he muttered “Maybe I can make this thing shoot lasers or have a built in magnet gun thingy” Jack chuckled, remembering the various watch gizmos 007 had for his movies.

Luna turned to him and Jack yawned “Come on let’s go get a rented room so I can get some sleep” Jack muttered.

* * *

Jack opened the door to Luna’s motel room, “Okay now I know that being a princess you’re probably used to 5 star hotels and shit but” Jack began but Luna squealed and ran over to the Christmas tree and looked at the decorations. “Yeah well anyway… I’m gonna be in the next room so if you need anything just call or whatever” Jack muttered and left Luna to her mingling.

Jack sighed as he walked through the door to his room and closed the door behind him. He didn’t even take off his shoes and simply flopped down on the bed, which was rather comfy considering it was a motel.

* * *

Jack felt hooves begin to shake his body, “Ahhhh 5 more minutes” Jack groaned but Luna kept shaking him. Jack groaned “Why can’t you be gentler like when I wake you up” Jack muttered as he looked to his watch and realized it was 5 in the afternoon. “We apologize Mr. Jack, but we wanted to know if you would accompany us to Ms. Pinkie Pie’s party” Luna offered and Jack slid off the bed and got up, a little drowsy but he still managed to go to the washroom and splash some water on his face to wake himself up.

“Alright let’s go” Jack muttered and Luna followed him out the door of the motel room. As they walked down the street Luna constantly tried to hold his hand with her hoof, Jack would constantly pull away. “Stop it” Jack muttered and Luna looked to him with a confused look. “In Equestria holding hooves is a way of showing friendship” Luna informed him and Jack groaned, “Fine whatever… just don’t uhhg” Jack mumbled and Luna took his hand and held it with her hoof. “See isn’t this more comfortable” Luna asked and Jack shook his head “No it’s… freaky” Jack muttered.

They entered the store known as Sugarcube corner were the party had obviously just begun. Jack held the door open, “Mares first… I think” Jack muttered and Luna smiled as she stepped through the doorway. The party went quiet as the entire group inside looked to Luna, whether in fear or out of respect they all kept quiet.

Jack stepped forward “What? You guys look like you just seen a ghost or something… oh wait this is perfect” Jack muttered as he grabbed a white table cloth and put it over his body. “Ooooo” Jack laughed, making scary ghost like noises and walked around like a ghost.

Only Pinkie laughed at the ridiculous actions but the others stayed quiet. Jack pulled the table cloth off his body. “Oh come on, you guys are a bunch of party killers” Jack laughed and Pinkie came dashing through the room spraying confetti everywhere but still the others remained silent.

“Please do not fear us, for we wish to take part in your joyest holiday known as Hearth’s warming” Luna informed them but still they didn’t move or talk. ‘Okay quick thinking Jack’ Jack thought to himself. He looked around and grabbed a red Santa hat and a few gifts from under a Christmas tree.

He snuck up behind Luna as she tried to talk the others into livening up the party again. He quickly slid the hat on her head and lifted her body up onto her hindlegs. “What do you think you’re doing, put us down” Luna boomed in her royal voice, which frightened many ponies.

“Hey shut up and go with it” Jack whispered and Luna kept quiet. Jack tried to do his best Santa Claus voice “Ho ho ho, merry Christmas, Merry Christmas” Jack said in a fake Santa Claus voice and began to toss presents towards the frightened group.

It still didn’t make them budge and Jack set Luna back down on all fours. “Hmm come on Jack think” Jack thought outloud then snapped his fingers. “Luna try and… try and coo them or something” Jack said as he ran outside. ‘What in Equestria could he be thinking?’ Luna thought to herself and looked towards the frightened group. “Please do not fear us, for we simply want to join you in your festivities” Luna began.

Jack walked outside and lightly packed some snow into a snowball. “Oh boy, desperate times call for desperate measures” Jack muttered to himself and ran back inside. “Hey uhh Luna?” Jack asked and Luna turned her head. Jack gave the snowball a light toss and the snowball hit her in the side of the face, the snowball was in no means hard and when it impacted her head it puffed into a cloud of snow.

The group stood there silently as Luna gave Jack a cold stare.

Snowball fight

The tension could literally be felt in the air as Luna starred coldly at Jack. “OH-IT-IS-ON” Luna said in a playfully dark voice and lept through the air, tackling Jack onto the snowy ground outside. Jack rolled to the side and lept off Luna and packed another snowball but Luna used her magic to her advantage and as Jack turned to throw the snowball at Luna he was greeted by the sight of literally 100 snowballs as they pummeled his body relentlessly.

“SNOWBALL FIGHT” Pinkie screamed and immediately joined the fight, getting some odd contraption that acted like an automatic catapult, launching snowballs like a machinegun. Jack rolled to one side and dodged a barrage of snowballs Luna threw at him. Suddenly a heap of snowballs buried Luna.

Jack looked just in time to roll out of the way as a barrage of snow flew at him. Luna burst from the snow and looked to Pinkie then to Jack. “Enemy of my enemy” Jack said and they both gave a truce nod and darted in separate directions in a pincer movement and launched snowballs at Pinkie and her automatic catapult.

As the fight raged on several ponies looked fearfully out the window to see the princess of the night playing joyfully in the snow. Several ponies joined in the snowball fight and snowballs were hurtled left, right and center.

Jack got slammed in the head by a snowball and looked to see Applejack smile, he lept to the side as she tossed more snowballs at him. He ducked behind a snow pile as Applejack tossed snowballs at him. He grunted to himself and packed together multiple snowballs and lept over the snow pile to see that the southern pony was no longer there.

His senses blared and he ducked as a snowball flew past the air above him, where his head had been only moments ago. He turned to see the orange pony snickering as she tossed another snowball at Jack who dodged it with utmost profession, ‘Guess 007 never thought about snow conditions’ Jack thought to himself as he felt the wetness of the snow seep through his suit.

Applejack grabbed for another snowball but realized she was out. Jack snickered and tossed a snowball which impacted on her chest. Jack turned his attention to Pinkie as she launched a barrage of snow at him, he lept through the air and tackled Applejack out of the way.

“Yah know yah don’t have tah be so dramatic? It’s just a snowball fight” Applejack laughed and Jack nodded, “We have an automatic catapult to take over” Jack laughed and Applejack gave him a look of curiosity. “Weren’t we just fighting?” Applejack reminded Jack and he simply shrugged. “Consider it a temporary truce” he told her and they both got up and charged head on towards Pinkie’s snowball catapult machine.

As Applejack and Jack charged past groups who threw snowballs at each other they leaned down and each of them curled up a single snowball. “Only one shot” Jack said, Applejack rolled her eyes.

Time seemed to slow for that sort of dramatic effect and in the distance, or rather 5 feet away from them, ponies threw snowballs and were struck by snowballs. Pipsqueak tossed a snowball at Rarity but it was grabbed mid-flight by her magic and redirected back towards him. It hit Pipsqueak center mass and he made an epic fall and landed in front of Jack’s path.

Jack lept over Pipsqueak’s body and continued on. Pinkie laughed hysterically as her automatic catapult launched a continuous barrage of snowballs. Applejack and Jack bother lept over the sides of the catapult and tossed snowballs into Pinkie who cried out in laughter.

Time seemed to return to normal as Pinkie Pie rolled on the ground as she continued to laugh in the pure ecstasy of fun. “Sometimes I worry about that mare’s well-being” Jack commented and Applejack nodded “We all do”.

Twilight got a mischievous smile on her face and launched a large cloud of fluffy snow into the air, almost like a smokescreen (or snowscreen). She ran through the snowscreen and lept over snow banks as she charged towards Rainbow Dash who was dominating on her turf.

Rainbow Dash laughed as Sweetie Bell and Applebloom created snowballs which Rainbow Dash as Scootaloo tossed at incredibly high rates. It was almost comical.

“Oh no, Scootaloo look out, it’s Twilight” Sweetie Bell called out and Scootaloo looked to Twilight who was charging straight for them. Scootaloo tapped Rainbow Dash on the shoulder and the 2 Pegasus began to launch a barrage of snowballs at Twilight, but she blocked the barrage with a shield spell.

“Hey… that’s not fair” Rainbow Dash called out but suddenly Twilight grasped the stockpile of snowballs with her magic and turned them against their creators. Rainbow Dash gulped “Oh this is not good”.

Snow literally covered them as Twilight covered them with snowballs. Rainbow Dash’s head poked out of the snow pile, “Oh I’m gonna sooo get that mare” she scowled.

Twilight brushed off her hooves, proud of her work. Suddenly a snowball hit her in the side of the face and she turned to her aggressor. “Face me, student of Celestia” Luna challenged in a playful tone. “Oh you are on Princess of the night” Twilight said, accepting the challenge.

Twilight tossed clumps of snow at Luna but she flipped through the air and took flight, using her own magic, Luna launched a barrage of snowballs at Twilight. Twilight lept to one side and slid along the slippery ground and slid to a stop, snow fluffing up like dust.

“Give up Twilight, for you are a student and I am a master” Luna laughed and tossed more snow at Twilight but Twilight grabbed the snow from her magical grasp and launched the snow back at her. Luna dive bombed for the ground and landed on the snowy ground blissfully.

Snow had begun to accumulate on her back and she shook like a dog to fluff the snow off. The classic tune ‘Let it snow’ began to play in the background as the group continued their snowball fight. Snow still poured down from the sky and the streets outside Sugarcube corner were illuminated by streetlamps as the group playfully fought in the snow.

Jack looked up to see Twilight and Luna battling. Jack raced up beside Twilight and tossed a snowball at Luna who dodged it. “I thought you were on my side” Luna gasped and Jack chuckled “In snowball fights there are no sides” Jack told her but as he did he gave her a wink. A mischievous smile formulated on her face and the two began to launch snowballs at each other. “Twilight, go around and hit her from the rear” Jack told he but just as she spun around Jack grabbed her and lifted her body in front of his. “Double agent” Twilight scoffed as she realized she had been tricked. “The name’s Bond, James Bond” Jack laughed, trying to do his best James Bond impersonation.

“Your name is Jack” Twilight told him and Jack sighed as Luna threw a snowball at Twilight who was being held in place by Jack. At the last possible second Twilight used a teleportation spell to teleport away and the snowball smacked Jack in the face.

Jack grunted and wiped the snow from his face, he looked to the side as Twilight called out to her friends. Luna and Jack backed into each other as the element bearers surrounded them, well minus Fluttershy, she had been hiding behind a snow bank the entire fight.

“Back to back” Jack told Luna and she lept up onto her hind legs and the duo locked their arms together. “Wait… bad idea, how are we supposed to make snowballs?” Jack asked. “Just kick the snow, I’ll make it into a snowball mid-flight” Luna informed him and the duo began kicking snow at the element bearers and as she said she would, Luna began to form the flying clumps of snow into snowballs mid-flight.

Snowballs flew through the air and collided with their targets, Pinkie got her contraption running again and launched a large barrage of snowballs at Luna and Jack and it resulted in them being buried in a heap of snow.

Jack muttered something to himself that kind of sounded like “Stupid catapult” but his voice was muffled by all the snow. Luna tilted her head back so her mouth wasn’t buried in the snow, “Hold on to me” Luna ordered and Jack rolled his eyes and gave a muffled response as Luna performed the teleportation spell and transported them both out of the snow pile.

The element bearers were all looking at the snow pile where they thought that Luna and Jack were still buried under. “Should we get them out?” Rarity asked and Rainbow Dash laughed “Nah let’s leave em in there for a little while longer” she chuckled and Luna and Jack created a small stock pile of snowballs as the element bearers continued to look at the snow pile.

“Well I guess it’s been long enough, let’s unbury them” Twilight said and the group let down their guard to unbury the empty pile. “Hey Twi” Jack called out and the group turned to see Luna and Jack standing with a large barrage of snowballs. “Uh-oh” Rarity gulped and Luna and Jack launched the barrage of snow at them.

The fight only lasted a few minutes longer before ponies started to get wet and travel inside Sugarcube corner to dry off and warm up. Jack sat against the wall of Sugarcube and sighed. Luna sat beside him “That was fun… I enjoyed it” Luna said, saying I instead of we. Jack nodded “Well, I guess we should go inside and cause some more havoc” Jack chuckled and stood up and shook off the snow on his suit.

As they entered inside the group looked to Luna and the party became quiet again. Jack sighed to himself then looked up at the group. The group suddenly began to cheer and Jack was flushed with relief as Luna walked over and began socializing with ponies.

Jack sat across the room, by himself because that’s the way he liked to be at parties. Rarity walked over to him, “I have your clothes ready and clean back at the boutique so when you’re ready just stop by and pick them up… oh for Celestia’s sake I thought I told you not to ruin this suit” Rarity giggled and walked off back to the crowd.

“So princess tell us what it’s like being a princess” Rainbow Dash suggested and Luna began her tale about the regular everyday life of a princess.

Jack sat alone and pulled out a pack of cigarettes but looked to them with disgust, they were soggy and wet due to the snowball fight. “Well I guess I better start quitting now” Jack said and tossed the cigarettes into the garbage and instead took a breath mint.

The conversations went on and the shy Pegasus known as Fluttershy approached Jack as he sat and muttered to himself. “Hello Jack… uhm beautiful evening” Fluttershy commented, obviously trying to make small talk. She was terribly shy and was never good at talking with Jack. “Yeah… it really is something isn’t it” Jack replied, “Uhm so… any plans for the holiday?” Fluttershy asked and Jack pointed over his shoulder to Luna.

“Got orders to show Luna the holiday festivities and what not” Jack replied and Fluttershy nodded. “How about you?” Jack asked and she shied away from comment and blushed “Oh well… I uhm was just going to spend Christmas with my friends” Fluttershy stuttered shyly.

Suddenly some classy jazz music played and ponies began to dance. “Oh… excuse me Jack, but I love this song” Fluttershy told him and got up and walked over to Rarity and the 2 began to dance along with the others. Jack sat by himself and poured himself a cup of hot chocolate and sighed as he watched the snow fall beautifully to the ground.

“Now imagine if there was a tiny civilization on one of those snowflakes” Jack chuckled. Suddenly Luna tapped Jack on the shoulder and Jack turned to look at her. “What’s up kid?” Jack asked and Luna extended her hoof. “What? You want me to hold your hoof again or something?” Jack asked curiously. Luna stuttered at first but then managed to put together a sentence.

“Would you dance with me… there is no-pony else to dance with” Luna asked, Jack leaned back and saw several ponies sitting on the sides. He leaned forward again and sighed as he stood up. “Alright… we’ll dance, but just one song” Jack said and the duo went to the dance floor and began to slow dance. ‘Man this is too… romantic’ Jack thought to himself.

As the night went on Jack lost count of how many songs he danced to with Luna, each time just saying to himself ‘One more couldn’t hurt’. Ponies began to head home and soon the crowd had shrunk to a few idle ponies. “Hey Jack heads up” Pinkie yelled and Jack looked to her with a confused look.

She rolled her eyes and pointed upwards, above his head hung a mistletoe. “Uhm I don’t really know what to say” Jack replied as he looked down to Luna who at the moment had her forelegs wrapped around his neck. She looked up to him and fluttered her eyes. “Well don’t you know? You have to kiss her silly” Pinkie Pie called out and Jack blushed, he had considered Luna cute (for a horse, or pony or whatever) but this was borderline for him.

Luna leaned closer towards him and closed her eyes and Jack looked side to side for a good excuse to not kiss her. Suddenly the lights cut out and the music stopped. ‘Whew saved by the bell, or rather the power outage’ Jack thought to himself and Luna removed her forelegs from around his neck and dropped down to all fours. A dark purple haze filled the room and blackish smoke seeped along the ground.

A guitar solo could be heard as a dark cloaked figure stepped forward and a reddish horn illuminated the room. Purple smoke emulated from his eyes, his mane was a jet black and his fur coat was dark grey. “Fear me, for I am King Sombra” he hissed and the guitar played a low note. Jack looked over to the pony who had constantly followed him around and made epic musical notes that corresponded perfectly with the moments. “Hold that thought” Jack said and raced into a back closet.

Seconds later he returned with a Mexican sombrero and an accordion. He placed the sombrero on Sombra’s head and raced over to the guitarist and whispered something in his ear. Jack then stood back. “1, 2, 3, 4” Jack said and they began to play Mexican mariachi music. Sombra roared at the obvious insult, tossing the hat away and stomping his hooves to the ground. “SILENCE” Sombra roared and Jack and the guitarist stopped.

A hologram image of northern Equestria was brought up via magic from Sombra’s horn. “I have recently taken over the northern pole and this year there shall be no Hearth’s warming” Sombra laughed and as the group watched the hologram. They all gasped as a black cloud loomed over the North Pole and melted away the snow. “By Hearth’s warming everything will be covered in darkness and there shall be no presents and no Hearth’s warming” he informed them then let out a maniacal laugh.

The plan to stop Christmas

“Hold on” Twilight yelled out and Sombra gave her a cold look. “I thought we beat you, what gives?” Twilight asked and Sombra gave and irritated sigh. “Do you remember when you teleported this fellow Jack to hell?” Sombra hissed and Twilight nodded, “It was an accident” Twilight replied.

Sombra rolled his eyes “Yes well, anyway, when Jack here shot his way out of hell I simply followed him and I’ve been building my power for the longest time… AND NOW NO-PONY CAN STOP ME” Sombra yelled. Suddenly a gunshot went off and Sombra’s horn was shot off. “GAH, MY HORN… WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?” Sombra screamed and looked to Jack who was holding a still smoking Walther PPK. “Maybe no-pony can kill you… but I ain’t a pony” Jack said as he shot at Sombra again, this time striking him in the chest, however his plated armour stopped the 9mm round.

Sombra staggered back as Jack unloaded the pistol into him, but his armour proved too much for the small 9mm cartridges. Jack looked at his gun then back to Sombra, “Shit” Jack muttered as he reloaded a fresh magazine into the pistol. Suddenly Sombra’s horn levitated off the ground and healed itself back onto Sombra’s head.

“Whoa, hold on… how the hell’d yah do that?” Jack gasped and Sombra chuckled. “You really didn’t think that I’d just come here unprepared, I knew you were my biggest threat so I’d have to kill you first” Sombra laughed and a blast of energy from his horn slammed into Jack’s chest and propelled him out the door, a trail of smoke following him.

Sombra turned to the others, his horn began to glow but before he was able to shoot them down Luna charged into his side and tackled him to the ground. “YOU SHALL NOT HURT OUR FRIENDS” Luna bellowed but she was not very combat effective and Sombra simply kicked her off his body and lept on top of her. “Time to die, Princess of the night” Sombra sneered and his horn began to glow a dark red.

Suddenly a gunshot went off and Sombra’s horn was once again cut off. Sombra screamed in agonizing pain as he grasped for his horn but Jack took another shot and the round slammed into the shoulder of his armour and knocked him over. Jack stood in the doorway, snow blew past him and he held his still smoking Walther with one hand. There was a large burn hole in the center of the suit chest but it appeared as if Jack was relatively unharmed.

Sombra got up, “How did you…” Sombra growled and Jack shrugged. “If that’s your best than give up now because you aren’t going to win” Jack ordered and Sombra took a cautious step back, “We shall meet again… Jack” Sombra laughed and with that both he and his broken horn vanished.

Jack chuckled to himself and holstered the pistol. Several of the ponies in the room were still cowering under tables and what not, “Okay… the bad guy is gone” Jack said outloud and slowly ponies began to come out from their hiding spots. “Oh this is not good” Twilight exclaimed and Jack gave her a not so worried look. “Why, I could just shoot him and he’d be dead” Jack laughed, but Luna interjected.

“No you couldn’t” Luna told him and Jack turned to her, “And why not, this little pee shooter seemed to work pretty damn effectively against him” Jack laughed but Luna didn’t find humor in his statement. “The last time he was in Equestria we only beat him by sheer luck, if he has been to hell and has returned then we fear that his powers may have doubled… only one thing can beat him and that is the elements of harmony” Luna explained and Jack sighed.

At that time Celestia burst through the doorway, “Where is he?” she asked frantically and Jack raised his hand. “Hey Celestia, yeah I know I never” Jack began but Celestia cut him short “No, where is Sombra” Celestia replied and Jack sighed. In his best Australian voice he replied “Oh he’s at the bloody North Pole mate and I think he’s planning to” Jack began but Celestia cut him off. “Enough of your games Jack, this is serious… Twilight where is Sombra?” she asked and Twilight looked to Jack then back to Celestia.

“He’s at the North Pole, he’s using some form of dark magic to melt the snow and encase Equestria in darkness” Twilight replied. “Then our worst fears have come true… Shining Armor” Celestia barked and Shining Armor stepped forward. “Yes ma’am?” Shining Armor replied and she nodded to Twilight.

“Take a dozen of your best soldiers and escort the element bearers to the Northern Pole and eliminate Sombra before he destroys Equestria” Celestia ordered and he nodded. Celestia turned to her sister and looked to Jack, “I’m going with them, Jack take care of my sister in this time of darkness” Celestia replied. Luna interjected “No sister, we wish to come with you. We can help” Luna replied but Celestia shook her hoof. “No, little sister. If something were to happen to me Equestria would still need a ruler… Jack I’m trusting you with my sister, don’t bring her in harm’s way” Celestia ordered and with that they began to depart.

“Hey wait” Jack called out and they turned back. “Rarity pass me the keys to your boutique, I need my clothes” Jack called back. “Oh of course, I nearly forgot” Rarity said and levitated over a set of keys.

The element bearers, along with Celestia, Shining Armor and a couple of royal guards boarded some flying carriages and departed. “Well… that’s one way to crash a party… Come on, I need some clean clothes” Jack told Luna and the duo walked out of Sugarcube corner and made their way to Rarity’s boutique shop.

* * *

Jack fumbled with the keys and found the proper key for the front door and opened it. The lights were turned off and Jack stumbled around in the darkness looking for the light switch. “Hey Luna, would you mind lighting the place up a little?” Jack asked and Luna’s horn lit up and the store was illuminated with a beautiful dark blue haze. “Hmm, well that’s a little nicer” Jack said and gave Luna a nod as he found the light switch and flicked it on. The store lit up and Luna stopped producing the blue haze of light.

“Hmm” Jack mumbled as he looked at Luna. “Why are you looking at us so… strangely?” Luna asked and Jack walked up beside her. “By chance do you know your size?” Jack asked, “We beg your pardon?” Luna gasped. Jack rolled his eyes “Well how the hell am I supposed to find you some winter clothing if I don’t know your size” Jack replied.

“Oh… I’m not quite sure… we could always just try things on” Luna replied and Jack sighed “Alright let’s get some winter clothes”

* * *

Jack finished rolling down the sleeves on his duster coat and looked at Luna. She was wearing a ridiculous red outfit, really it was a Santa outfit but they called it something else in Equestria. She also wore a red Santa hat with a white cotton ball on the tip of the hat, her appearance was absolutely hilarious and Jack couldn’t help but to laugh a little. “Is something funny?” Luna asked as she fit comfortably into the Santa suit.

“Yeah you look like Santa” Jack replied, Luna gave him a curious look “Who’s Santa?” Luna asked curiously. “Well back on my world there was this guy named Chris Cringle, anyway a long time ago he went home to home and gave children presents one night and then it just kind of became like a special occasion every year that people would give presents. Of course Chris Cringle was dead long after the holiday continued but people would tell their children that if they were good all year that Santa would bring them lots of presents” Jack informed her, leaving out the part that in Christianity the 25th of December was also the day of Jesus birth but he really didn’t want to explain to Luna how it all worked so kept it short and just explained the Santa part of it.

“So it’s much like our Magical Mare who gives out presents to the young colts and fillies who have been good” Luna replied and Jack shrugged. “So how do I look?” Luna asked as she gave a ridiculous pose. “Like a Santa Clause… or a Santa who is somehow a unicorn with wings” Jack replied and Luna frowned. “They call us alicorns, and I was hoping for something a little closer to the Magical Mare of Hearth’s warming” Luna replied and looked at herself.

“Hmm well if the Magical Mare looks anything like the Santa back in my world I guess you’d have a striking resemblance” Jack replied. Jack thought to himself and wondered if his house he had in Ponyville was still his or if they had sold it. “Well time to go” Jack replied and Luna stopped looking at herself and looked to Jack. “Where are we going?” Luna asked and Jack smiled “Oh I have an idea, don’t worry”

A trip to the North Pole

Jack flicked the light on and his shabby little shack lit up. “Uhm… nice place” Luna said, obviously lying to cover up how hideous it was. “Yeah I know right, real mansion, anyway I got some things I need in the basement” Jack muttered and rolled up the carpet. “There’s a basement in this house?” Luna asked and Jack nodded.

Jack pulled out a crowbar and broke open the floor boards. “Just what in Celestia’s name do you think you’re doing” Luna gasped as Jack continued to sever the floor boards. “Well Celestia wasn’t too keen on letting random ponies own firearms and well let’s just say she’d probably throw me in prison for longest time if she ever found out what I had in my basement so I covered up my basement before any-pony found out what was down there… never really contemplated digging it up but with things the way they are…” Jack trailed off as he got the final floor board off revealing just plain dirt ground.

Jack pulled out a small shovel and dug 3 feet down until his shovel hit a metallic object. Jack swept away any loose dirt and revealed a security safe door, like on a bank. Jack dialed in a combination and pulled the door open. He hopped into the basement safe room, or whatever it was, and looked up to Luna.

“Hey pass me a light” Jack called out but instead Luna fluttered down and illuminated the room with her horn. She gasped at the sight, the room wasn’t extensively large but the contents were breathtaking. “Where… where did you get all this?” Luna asked and Jack shrugged, “Well when I first came to Equestria they were already producing small firearms but rather ineffective ones: cannons, muzzle loaders etc. so all I did was use a little common knowledge and showed them how to produce these sort of firearms” Jack replied and Luna levitated out an M16 an looked at it curiously.

“The designs came from my world and didn’t quite work well with ponies, except unicorns, so we had to redesign them but I made sure that they produced some rifles that I could use” Jack replied and pulled out a large duffle bag. “If you see on you like feel free to take it” Jack told her and he began tossing Desert Eagle magazines into the bag along with .45 magazines and .357 rounds.

Luna browsed the selection of guns but couldn’t find one that fit her fancy. Jack looked at a set of S&W 500 magnums and sighed as he grabbed the massive revolvers and extra ammunition, tossing them into the bag. Jack browsed the rifle selection, he contemplated between the AK47 and the M16. “Hmm, M16 has accuracy but it might jam during the fight, were the AK47 has the durability and reliability but is heavier and less accurate…” Jack muttered to himself but then his attention was drawn away.

“Ohhh baby… it’s like Christmas but Santa is giving me everything I want” Jack said as he walked up beside a table. On the table laid a classic M60 machine gun, though the gun itself weighed around 25 pounds Jack didn’t care in the least. He grabbed the machinegun and slung it on his back and grabbed ten, 100 round link feeds and placed them in the duffel bag.

He only needed a shotgun, or maybe a very effective submachine gun. He looked to his Mossberg which he had collected at Rarity’s but knew that 4 shots would probably be terribly ineffective in combat. He browsed through the Benelli M4s but figured them to be ‘not his style’ and continued on.

He wanted something that could stop a pony dead, or rather knock Sombra on his ass. He sighed to himself but then remembered one specific shotgun that always had a special place in his heart, despite weighing a near 9 pounds and being just a tad bit bulky. He walked over to a rack of shotguns and pulled out a classic Spas 12 and racked the slide back.

The gun still actioned like it was brand new and, despite some dust build up, was perfectly clean. Jack had replaced the lever safety with a button safety, it had an 8 round tubular magazine, a collapsible metallic folding stock and barrel heat guard. Jack grabbed a loaded bandolier of shotgun shells and tossed them in his bag along with the shotgun.

He grabbed 2 old styled ballistic vests with heavy Kevlar plates, ‘shit, these things must weigh 50 pounds’ Jack thought as he tossed it into the bag as well. “Find anything you like?” Jack asked out loud, “Nothing yet” Luna replied. Jack tossed some other items into the bag and browsed around the room a little longer.

He walked to corner were Luna was browsing through the heavy machine guns. She turned and looked to an object that was covered by a blanket and walked over with the utmost curiosity. Pulling off the blanket revealed the object to be an M134 Gatling gun, a sly smile tugged on the end of her lips and she levitated out the machine gun and rotated the barrels, the gun cocked and Luna looked to Jack with her sly smile.

“Oh please, can we please have it” Luna begged as her eyes formed into puppy dog eyes and she began to pout. “That is so you” Jack said and rolled his eyes “But you’re carrying that thing around” Jack replied and grabbed the ammunition feeder box, his duffel bag and led Luna out of the basement room.

Jack closed the safe door and covered the hole in but didn’t bother putting the floorboards back in. “Where to now?” Luna asked and Jack chuckled, “The garage” Jack laughed and turned off the light in his garage, leading Luna out of the shack and towards a small garage.

Jack lifted the front sliding door and turned on a single light bulb in the middle of the small garage. In the garage sat an old 1979 Ford Bronco, “What is that?” Luna asked and Jack shrugged. “It’s an automobile… actually it’s a truck” Jack said as he pulled off the box cover, revealing that the back seats had been taken out and an M2 heavy machine gun had been mounted on a pivotal mount.

“I got a motorized carriage manufacturer to build me it, replaced the metal body with bullet proof material, 460 big block with supercharger, basically… she’s the whole 9 yards” Jack said as he lifted some gasoline jerry cans into the back. Jack leaned into the truck and turned the ignition but it only turned over, almost starting but not quite making it. “Dammit” Jack cursed. He hopped in the truck and pumped the accelerator pedal a few times then tried starting it again.

The truck roared to life and Jack leaned back with a sly smile and revved the truck. “Where are we going?” Luna asked and Jack chuckled “Why isn’t it obvious? To the North Pole of course” Jack laughed, ‘Hmm that line seems vaguely familiar’ Jack thought to himself.

“But our sister ordered us to stay here” Luna reminded him and Jack sighed. “Are you really going to follow every order your sister gives you?” Jack asked and Luna nodded. Jack gave an irritated sigh “Well… grow some balls already and let’s go” Jack groaned but Luna was taken back by the comment. “We beg your pardon” Luna gasped, “Oh sorry… I didn’t mean grow and actual pair of… forget it just hop in” Jack replied but Luna stepped back.

“Oh come on… it’ll be fun” Jack offered but Luna shook her head again. Jack tried to give her the puppy dog eye treatment but he wasn’t very cute and was unable to appeal to Luna. “Luna… oh come on, let’s adventure together, like Daring Do and… whoever the hell she had for a sidekick” Jack said and Luna sighed. “We are sorry Jack but we will not go against our sisters wishes” Luna replied.

Funny that only the other day he didn’t want Luna coming with him, but now he was trying his hardest to get her to come with him. Jack stepped out of the truck, he walked over to her.

“Luna please… I could probably do this on my own but…I want you to come with me” Jack said but Luna stepped back and again shook her head. Jack sighed and walked back towards the truck. “Well see you later Luna” Jack replied, turning off the shop light as he hopped in the truck and drove it out of the garage. “Hey wait… you can’t leave us here, Celestia said to watch over me” Luna called out and Jack put the truck into neutral and stopped the truck. Looking out the door window he called back “Yeah but you didn’t want to come with me so I’m leaving you here” Jack told her with a straight face.

“You wouldn’t” Luna exclaimed and Jack shrugged, “I would, and I’m going to. See yah later” Jack said but Luna rushed up to the side of the truck, opening the passenger door and hopping in the seat across from Jack. “Thought you weren’t coming” Jack teased and Luna rolled her eyes, “Yes well… You were leaving and you said you would take us with you on your holiday. So I’m coming with you” Luna replied.

“Ha ha, reverse phycology” Jack laughed as he pulled the truck away from the garage. “Reverse what?” Luna asked and Jack shrugged, “You didn’t want to go so I said you weren’t going and because of that you wanted to go” Jack laughed and Luna shook her head. “That’s not why I went” Luna replied and Jack looked to her “Yeah then why’d you go?” Jack asked and she simply shrugged “Because you were going and we aren’t going to let you go anywhere without us” Luna replied.

Jack opened the glove box, revealing a bunch of old records that he had various musical ponies play in rip off of the music that was played back on earth. Jack looked to Luna, “How far is the North Pole?” he asked and Luna shrugged, “We’ll be there tomorrow morning at about…” Luna trailed off and looked at the digital clock on the radio of the truck and made a quick mental calculation “About 10am tomorrow morning, but it’ll still be dark because not much sun shines up there”

* * *

Jack drove most of the way but part way through he taught Luna how to drive, which she enjoyed somewhat but obviously found it somewhat difficult. He pulled the truck over and got out. “What are you doing?” Luna asked and Jack looked back to her, “Taking a leak” Jack replied and let out a chuckle as he unzipped his pants and began to piss into the snow. “Hey Luna, watch this I’ll write my name in the snow” Jack said immaturely and began to write his name using his urine.

“J…A… C…K… Hahaha” Jack laughed and Luna landed beside him. Luna turned around and lifted her leg, “oh come on that’s… weird” Jack replied and Luna looked to him with a curious look “why? You asked us to watch you while you urinated and you say it’s strange for us to?” Luna asked and Jack thought about it for a moment, he wasn’t quite sure why he was uncomfortable with Luna taking a leak beside him, perhaps it was because she was female or maybe the fact that she was a talking horse.

Luna finished and looked to her handy work “Haha, the fun has been doubled” she laughed and Jack shuddered at the comment and hopped back in the truck along with Luna. They drove a while longer before they saw large factory complex in the distance.

Luna pointed to the factory, “That’s the Magical Mare’s toy making factory… if Sombra has taken over than he’ll most definitely have spread his darkness in there… we must save the elves” Luna replied. Jack got up and crawled into the back of the truck. He opened the duffel bag.

He locked a 100 round box magazine onto the .50 cal. M2 mounted onto the truck. He placed the large ballistic vest over his duster coat and placed the shotgun bandolier over top of it. Pulling out his Spas 12, he loaded it with 8 rounds and strapped it to his side. He loaded both the .500 S&Ws and placed them in the chest holsters of the combat vest. He loaded two .50 cal. Desert Eagles with chrome finishes and placed them in shoulder holsters. He put two large K-bar knives into chest sheaths, located below the revolvers, then grabbed a sheath and strapped it to his lower leg and placed his foot long bowie knife in the sheath.

He hooked up multiple frag grenades in chest mounts on the ballistic vest. Cocking a fresh feed belt into the M60, he leaned the massive machinegun over his shoulder and looked to Luna. “You drive” Jack said and Luna pointed at herself. “You want us to drive?” Luna asked and Jack nodded “Yeah I trust yah” Jack replied and Luna gave him a heartwarming smile. “You’ve only known us for a day… you know that right?” Luna said and Jack simply shrugged, “Yeah well… whatever it only takes a day to get to know someone” Jack said as he grabbed a certain cassette and placed it in the radio.

The tunes of ‘Paint it black’ began to play and Jack leaned up against the mounted machine gun as Luna pressed the accelerator to the floor, the trucks massive engine roared and got the attention of guards at the factory gates. Jack smiled and cocked the machinegun. The 2 shadow guards, obviously Sombra’s henchmen lifted their assault rifles and pointed them at the oncoming truck.

I see a red door and I want it to painted black

No colours anymore I want them to turn black…

Battle royal

The guards screamed something that sounded like stop but Jack paid no attention and mounted the M2. He pressed down on the trigger button and the Browning roared to life, spitting out .50 cal. rounds with deadly results. The guard to the left spun and was taken off his hooves and tossed through the window of the border crossing building. The Bronco smashed through the flimsy wooden gate and Jack swiveled the Browning back towards the other guard and tore his body apart with a burst of .50 caliber rounds.

I see the girls walk by dressed in their summer clothes

I have to turn my head until my darkness goes…

Jack swiveled the Browning back around and took aim of a group of shadow guards as they rushed out from behind large snow hills. Jack let out a war cry and held the trigger of the M2 down as it spit out lead death. The shadow guards screamed as their flesh and muscle was ripped from the bone, blood covered the snow and the snow turned from beautiful white to dark red.

I see a line of cars and they’re all painted black

With flowers and my love both never to come back…

A barricade of carriages was set up to block their path and ponies took cover behind the carriages, Jack motioned for Luna to turn down another path and lined up a shot with the barricade and unloaded on them. The carriages were no match for the mighty .50 caliber rounds and the rounds simply tore holes straight through the carriages and riddled the bodies of any shadow guards unlucky enough to be behind them.

I see people turn the heads and quickly look away

Like a newborn baby it just happens every day…

A group of ponies began to pursue the Bronco with a motorized armoured carriage but its armour was light and meant to stop small caliber rounds like .45 and 9mm, not .50 caliber. Jack swiveled the gun around and took aim on his pursuers, squeezing the trigger down and letting off a barrage of ammunition, brass casing littered the truck box along with spent ammunition linkage.

I look inside myself and see my heart is black

I see a red door and must have it painted black…

The carriage was torn apart and the occupants inside shook violently as .50 caliber rounds tore through their bodies and ripped them apart. Luna drifted around a corner to where yet another barricade had been foolishly set up to try and stop them. Jack swiveled the gun again, “What do we do?” Luna asked and Jack began to fire the M2. “Drive through it” he ordered.

Maybe then I’ll fade away and not have to face the facts

It’s not easy facin up when your whole world is black…

The M2 shook violently and spat out rounds at a rate of fire around 500rpm. Jack continued his war cry as the Bronco slammed into the carriage blockade and smashed through it. Carriages flew flimsily through the air as the Bronco ceased to slow its pace and continued on. Jack pivoted the gun and fired on the guards still foolish enough to stand around. His ammo box ran dry and he began to reload it.

No more will my green sea turn a darker blue

I could not foresee this thing happening to you…

Luna drifted around another corner of a snow bank and continued on, Jack loaded a new belt of ammunition in the machinegun and cocked back the charging bolt. “GET SOME” Jack roared out.

A lone shadow guard lay prone on top of a snow bank, wearing a pure white winterized camouflage suit. He took aim on the truck as it continued its rampage.

If I look hard enough into the setting sun

My love will laugh with me before the morning comes…

The shadow sniper cocked the bolt on his rifle and peered through his scope, he took aim on the truck and figured to take out the driver, and then pick off the gunner while the truck slows to a stop. He slowed his breathing as he took aim on the alicorn princess driving the truck.

I see a red door and I want it painted black

No colours anymore I want them to turn black…

The sniper took aim and led the target by an inch or so as she came ever closer, he saw her say something to the gunner but he couldn’t make it out. He steadied his aim further and waited for the exact right moment to strike.

I see the girls go by dressed in their summer clothes

I have to turn my head until my darkness goes…

His moment had arrived, he prayed a quick prayer to Sombra as he pulled the trigger. His 30-06 rifle boomed and kicked in his hooves, the round projected at high speeds and slammed into the windshield of the truck. The windshield spider webbed and cracked, the truck lost control and drove up a snow bank and came to an abrupt stop. The sniper smiled. The landscape almost seemed to zone out as the lone melody of ‘Paint it black played’ for a seemingly infinite time.

I want to see it painted, Painted black

Black as night, black as cool

Jack’s voice could be heard giving out a terrifying roar as he squeezed the trigger on the M2, .50 caliber rounds tore apart the snow bank that the sniper was on and his body was eviscerated by the barrage of lead death, blood erupted into the air in a fine mist.

I wanna see the sun, blotted out from the sky

I wanna see it painted

Painted

Painted

Painted black…

“LUNA!” Jack yelled and grabbed for the alicorn mare in the driver seat. He ducked his head inside the truck to see her body. She looked to him and gave a weak smile “sorry but… We can’t see out of the window” Luna replied and Jack sighed as he remembered he had installed magically enhanced bullet-proof windshields on the truck.

The music of ‘Paint it black tuned out as Jack pulled out his M60 and slammed the butt stock of the gun into the window until it fell out. “Make sure to have a protective shield over yourself” Jack said and Luna gave him a teasing smile “We… I never knew you cared so much about me Jack” she replied and he chuckled to himself as he mounted the machinegun once again, “Guess I have a soft spot for you” Jack chuckled. The tunes of ‘Satisfaction, by the rolling stones’ began to play and Jack smiled to himself as multiple shadow guards tried to take vantage points on top of snow banks and Luna reversed the truck and sped towards them.

A guard called out to one of his comrades and pointed to the truck, he leveled his M16 assault rifle and fired off a quick burst, the shots were terribly inaccurate and didn’t strike anywhere near the truck. Jack took aim and began to fire the M2 once again. The guard with the M16 screamed as rounds ripped apart his chest and he tumbled down the back side of the snow hill.

Painted black…

Satisfaction

I can’t get no

Satisfaction…

Jack leveled the M2 on another guard who was firing at them with an MP5 sub machinegun and fired off a quick burst into the guard, his foreleg was torn off as a 50 cal. round ripped through his shoulder and severed the limb from his body.
Cause I try

And I try

And I try

And I try…

Several guards burst from an outside office building and fired at the truck as it past, “Turn around” Jack ordered and Luna cranked the steering wheel, the truck skidded in a 180 degree motion and began to race back toward the office building.

I can’t get no

I can’t get no

When I’m driving in my car

And that man comes on the radio…

The guards stood foolishly outside the office and as the truck past they exchanged fire, but Jack had the obvious advantage and his mighty M2 destroyed the guards and shredded them to pieces.

And he’s telling me more and more

About some useless information

Supposed to fire my imagination

I can’t get no…

Luna cranked the steering wheel and they drifted around another corner, Jack lined up his targets and shot them down like dominos, that exploded horrifically with blood and guts. Luna sped up and Jack took aim on a small pocket of guards that had dug into some fox holes they had created. It was a little more effective than the carriages, but not by much. The .50 caliber rounds devastated their bodies and left a crimson of blood and gore as a tribute of the guns massive firepower.

Oh, no, no, no

Hey, hey, hey

That’s what I say…

A group of shadow guards had positioned themselves behind a large barricade of carriages in hope that it would stop them. “Drive up in front of them and stop” Jack ordered and Luna did exactly as he ordered. The truck stopped in front of the barricade and several ponies where stupid enough to peek over the top of carriages. Jack began to unload into the barricade and shadow guards screamed as they were chopped down by the onslaught.

I can’t get no

Satisfaction

I can’t get no

Satisfaction…

Jack finished up with the barricade and pointed for Luna to turn around and continue driving. She spun the truck around and Jack spotted a guard on top of a rock crusher. ‘Wait, okay hold on… why the hell is there a rock crusher on the north pole?’ Jack asked himself but quickly shook off the thought and filled the guard with hot lead. The guard fell back into the rock crusher which for some reason was running and crushed the shadow guard’s body. As the song went on, Luna drifted around a corner but as she did a sleek sports carriage slid underneath the truck’s tires and flipped the truck on its side.

Jack fell out of the truck and rolled. He spotted the sports carriage spin around and several gun-ponies leaned out windows of the car and began to fire sub machineguns. Jack raced back to the carriage and grabbed his M60, cocking back the charging bolt, holding the M60 in one hand and the belt feed in the other he charged out from behind the truck and hip fired the machinegun at the sports carriage.

The carriage was totalled within seconds and the occupants inside were torn up by the smaller 7.62mm rounds. Their bodies shook violently as the rounds ravaged their bodies into a bloody mess, the car came to a stop and black smoke emulated from under the hood.

Jack watched as a group of 7 shadow guards charged around the snow bank and took aim on him. Jack once again began to hip fire the massive M60 from hip level as the shadow guards took aim and began to fire. But for some reason, despite the guards taking aimed shots and Jack simply firing from the hip, the shadow guards never scored a single hit and Jack tore them down with a barrage of lead.

He raced back to the truck where Luna crawling out from the truck. Jack crouched down and began to pull the truck upwards, or at least trying to. The truck began to tilt back onto all four tires but despite Jack’s immense strength he wouldn’t be able to lift the 2 and a half ton behemoth of a truck. Luna’s horn glowed and a magical aurora encased the truck and tipped it back on its tires, amazingly the truck was still running.

Luna hopped in the driver seat and Jack lept into the box and once again mounted the machinegun. “Wait… Luna, turn the truck off” Jack ordered. “Why?” Luna asked and Jack simply motioned for her to do as he said. She obliged willingly and Jack listened to the quiet breeze. “What do you hear?” Luna asked and Jack shook his head “Nothing” he replied.

“Is that bad?” Luna asked and Jack nodded, “yeah cause right about now we should have just about every Shadow Guard on our asses” Jack began but suddenly a distant gunshot went off, “Luna start the truck, and head towards where that gunshot went off”

Defying orders

“Pistachio” Shining Armor called out, his elite royal guard-pony had been shot through the head by one of Sombra’s shadow guards armed with and AK47. “Don’t fucking move” one of the shadow guards hissed. Shining Armor had explicit orders to stay outside and protect the outer perimeter while Celestia and the element bearers fought with Sombra.

They had been ambushed and Shining had lost most of his stallions in the fight and now they were being held prisoner. Shining Armor gritted his teeth “You can’t kill prisoners of war!” Shining yelled, one of the shadow guards sneered and shot another one of his soldiers in the head. Shining lept to his hooves and charged the shadow guard but he simply rammed the stock of his rifle into Shining’s stomach and the blow knocked Shining to the ground.

“I’d kill you, but Sombra wants to do it personally… after he kills your sister that is” the guard laughed. He stopped laughing as he listened, the entire group started to listen. In the distance the roar of an engine could be heard, but as it drew closer loud speakers could be heard playing rock and roll

Back in black

I hit the sac

I’ve been to long

I’m glad to be back

“What the fuck is that shit?” one of the shadow guards hissed as the thunderous music got closer. “Uhh I think it’s the song ‘Back in black’” one of the other guards retorted. “Shut your fucking mouth I know what music it is, but what the fuck is playing it” the other guard replied.

Yes I’m let loose

From the noose

That’s kept me hanging about…

The music drew ever closer and the guards raised their rifles away from prisoners and towards the sound of the music. “Whatever comes around that corner… kill it” the head shadow guard ordered and they all kept their rifles trained on the corner of the snow bank.

I’ve been looking at the sky

Cause it’s getting me high

Forget the hearse cause I never die…

The leader shadow guard gritted his teeth as the music could be heard just on the other side of the snow bank, but suddenly the engine revved out and thundered at an incredibly loud rate and all the guard’s jaws dropped as a Ford Bronco burst from over the top of the snow bank.

“Oh shit!” the shadow guard leader screamed at the machine gunner began to fire his mounted death machine.

The thunderous rattle of the M2 hindered the music as Jack held down the trigger on the Browning .50 caliber machinegun. Shadow guards screamed as they were ripped to pieces. Luna pulled the truck up beside Shining Armor and his remaining four elite guards. Jack ceased fire on the already shredded guards and looked to Shining with a wink.

“Looks like I’m saving your ass again” Jack laughed, Shining Armor rolled his eyes as he and his soldiers mounted into the back of the truck. “Luna, get us into the factory” Jack ordered and Luna slammed the accelerator to the floor, the engine roared and hindered the musical tune as Jack swung the machinegun forward towards the massive factory.

Guards stood on the edge of the factory roof and began to fire pot shots at the truck. Jack tilted the machinegun upwards and fired on the guards. One of the guards let out a comical scream (The one from star wars that the storm troopers always make) and fell to the ground. The other guards were either torn to shreds or wised up and retreated back into the factory.

A sports carriage raced out behind them and several gun-ponies leaned out the windows and fired at the truck. Several elite guards returned fire but the carriage had been customized with bullet proof metals and their assault rifles didn’t even dent the armour.

Jack swung the massive machinegun back around and riddled the carriage with .50 caliber rounds. Some rounds ricocheted off but the majority ripped through the car and annihilated the occupants inside. Suddenly, for whatever reason, the carriage exploded and flung upwards in an epic explosion. “Now that’s what I call action” Jack quoted.

“Jack… we have a problem” Luna called back and Jack turned to her only to see her predicament. In front of the factory doors stood a massive barricade of carriages along with several dozen armed shadow guards.

Jack unzipped his duffel bag and pulled out the second ballistic vest, “Lean forward” Jack ordered and Luna obliged. Jack slipped the ballistic vest over top of her body, though she wouldn’t be able to use her wings she would be protected from rounds that struck her exposed chest.

Jack ejected the tape, “Shining… get off” Jack ordered and Shining nodded and he and his elite soldiers disembarked the truck. “Hey uh Shining, if I die… tell Celestia I said hey” Jack laughed and placed a cassette tape into the radio and a somewhat depressing melody began to play. “Alright Luna, ram through that barricade and don’t stop going until we die” Jack replied.

Luna looked to him and quickly leaned over and gave him a kiss on the cheek. Jack gave her a look of curiosity, “For luck” Luna replied and Jack gave her a wink and patted her on the shoulder. He mounted the machinegun and took a deep breath as he loaded a fresh belt link into the machinegun. “Alright Luna let’s meet our makers… even if it is at the hooves of dark evil shadow guards” Jack replied and Luna floored it towards the barricade.

If I leave here tomorrow

Would you still remember me…

Several shadow guards lined up their rifles and one of the shadow guards began barking orders. Guards loaded fresh magazines into their rifles and other checked the load on their guns. One of the guards loaded a bolt action rifle and took aim using a carriage trunk as a hoof rest to steady his gun.

For I must be travelling on now

Cause there’s to many places I’ve got to see

But if I stayed here with you girl

Things just couldn’t be the same…

“FIRE!” one of the guards ordered and the sound of gun fire silenced out the tune of music. Jack gritted his teeth and held the trigger down on the M2 Browning.

One of the shadow guards fired an AK47, it rattled in his hooves but suddenly a barrage of .50 caliber rounds tore through his body and shred him to pieces. Another guard fired a G3 assault rifle, he ran dry of ammunition and knelt behind the cover of a carriage to reload but a burst of rounds tore through the carriage and tossed him across the ground, his lower half literally ripped of his top half. “Kill them god dammit” the leader called out. The guard with the sniper rifle took aim but suddenly a .50 caliber round tore through the optical lenses and tore his head off. Several guards began to dash for cover but there was no cover against the unstoppable might of the .50 caliber rounds.

Small caliber rounds bounced off the hardened armour shell of the Bronco and Jack continued to fire his massive machinegun of death. He swept back and forth in a horizontal sweep and held the trigger down. The machinegun was letting out a thunderous tone that hindered that of everything else but the roaring engine of the truck.

The leader shadow guard lifted up a G36 assault rifle with a 100 round double drum magazine and began to fire it at the oncoming truck. Jack concentrated his fire on the leader and he was eviscerated into a fine red mist as the .50 cal. rounds ripped his body apart. He let out an agonizing scream and several others panicked at the sight of their dying lieutenant.

Jack grabbed 2 belts of frag grenades from the canvas sac as the truck barreled through the barricade with unrelenting force. Jack pulled the pins on multiple grenades and tossed them separate way, landing by the hooves of several shadow guards who screamed at the sight of the explosives.

The explosion was thunderous and carriages were tossed through the air as the explosives set themselves off and detonated the other grenades. Jack spun the M2 around and fired off more rounds towards the shadow guards, rounds slammed into shadow guards and carriages alike and tore through them with unstoppable firepower. One of the carriage’s gas tanks caught fire and exploded, flying up into the air comically and landing on several shadow guards.

“Okay well that worked better than I thought” Jack replied and swung the machinegun back around and fired upon guards who had taken refuge in the factory. The machinegun roared in the factory and the echo of the gun seemed to go on forever, it was a truly terrifying sound and several shadow guards simply threw their guns down, got on their knees and surrendered to the awesome might of the machinegun.

However several others weren’t so terrified and were just plain stupid as they tried to stand up to the awesome firepower of the machinegun, only to be cut down in seconds.

“Okay Luna… let’s save the elves” Jack replied and hopped out of the truck. Luna turned off the truck and Jack slung his Spas 12 on his side, holding the M60 in his right hand and a fresh belt link of ammunition in the left. Jack looked to Luna “Okay so where’s the elves?” Jack asked and Luna levitated her M134 out and pointed to another factory door. “In the toy making facility” Luna replied and Jack chuckled “Let’s save Christmas”

Saving the elves

“The door’s locked” Luna informed Jack and he tried to open the door but it wouldn’t budge. “Nah, it ain’t locked it’s just… temporarily stuck in place” Jack replied as he tried to open the door. “Just face it… it’s locked” Luna told him but he refused to believe it.

“Hurry up slaves” one of the shadow guards said as he whipped one of the small ponies, which were dressed in green suits similar in style to that of Santa Claus’s. “Please… have mercy for we are just the elves” one of the elves cried but the shadow guards showed no mercy and whipped the elves harder.

Suddenly the front door burst down and Jack and Luna walked slowly through the front door and, for no apparent reason what so ever, there was a tremendous explosion behind them just to make their entrance even more epic.

The shadow guards turned their attention to them but it wouldn’t have mattered even if they had been waiting for them. Luna levitated the Gatling gun forward and activated the massive machinegun, at rates exceeding 6000 rounds per minute, the Gatling gun mowed down the guards.

Jack followed close beside her and, holding the M60 at hip level with one hand, he opened up on the remaining guards and withing seconds all the shadow guards were slain to pieces. The elves, now covered in the blood of the shadow guards, stood up and gasped at the horrific sight.

Jack and Luna simply walked past them as guards appeared on the watch balcony above the workshop and fired down on the duo. Jack tilted his machinegun upwards and held back the trigger and annihilated them with a burst of deadly 7.62mm ballistic rounds. They screamed as their nerves twitched after they died and as they fell to their deaths their assault rifles still rattled due to the death grip they had on the rifles.

A group of shadow guards burst from the other side of the workshop and fired rounds at the duo, Luna simply levitated her Gatling gun and fired an immense burst of ammunition at them and they were cut down where they stood. Body parts flew as the massive pony killer gun cut down guard after guard.
Another group burst through a shipping door but one guard had come prepared and had an M79 grenade launcher and fired of a grenade round at Jack. The round exploded and sent Jack’s body tumbling through the air. His M60 wasn’t damaged but slid away across the floor and out of his reach. He grunted in pain as he ducked behind a metal shipping crate and the group continued to fire on Jack. “Luna… shoot them” Jack called out but Luna didn’t reply, he looked over to see that Luna had also been tossed in the blast and now lay motionless against a steel assembly line.

“FUCK!” Jack yelled and unholstered both his S&W 500s and burst up from the cover. The revolvers were double action but due to the excessive recoil it wasn’t smart to pull the trigger as fast as you could because the guns would likely just snap your wrist. The revolvers let out thunderous KA-BOOMs as Jack triggered each revolver.

A round from one of the revolvers slammed into the chest of shadow guard who had been utilizing the grenade launcher. A hole was torn in his chest larger than the palm of a hand and his body was thrown across the floor. Multiple other guards shared the same fate. Jack’s revolvers ran out and he cursed as he holstered the revolvers and drew his favoured .50 caliber Desert Eagles with chrome finish.

The guns were relatively quiet compared to the larger 500 magnum but the results were just as deadly. One of the remaining shadow guard’s head was taken clean off as a .50 cal. AE round tore through his skull and the force burst his head apart. Another shadow guard screamed and began to turn and run but Jack fired a round into the pony’s rear and the force of the round flipped him and his body skidded across the floor.

Jack ejected both magazines and loaded fresh ones. He holstered the handguns and raced to Luna’s side. He gave her a nudge “Okay kid come on… Luna?” Jack asked but she didn’t move. His heart sank, “Oh fuck no… come on kid you can’t be dead… not from an attack like that” Jack said as he tried to shake her out of faking but she obviously wasn’t faking this time.

He felt for a pulse but didn’t quite know where to feel on a talking horse… or alicorn, or whatever the hell she was. He couldn’t feel a pulse “shit… shit, shit, SHIT” Jack cursed as he laid her body flat on the ground and began to perform CPR. “Come on… Luna you’re not dying on me… partially because I think your sister would kill me” Jack muttered as he tried furiously to bring her back.

He stopped pumping her chest and a tear rolled down his cheek. “FUCK” Jack yelled and his tears began to drip down onto Luna’s fur. A smile rolled up on the sides of her mouth and Jack noticed this. “Son-of-a-bitch” Jack gasped and Luna sat up “You god damned faker” Jack chuckled and Luna brushed her flowing mane out of her face. “You really do care about me” she teased, saying ‘me’ rather than ‘us’. “Uhm I uh don’t” Jack stuttered and Luna gave him a nudge. “Don’t worry about it… I won’t tell my sister” she teased, again using singular term rather than plural when addressing herself.

Jack stood up and helped Luna to her hooves, he dashed off and grabbed his M60 and loaded a new belt linkage into it.

In a room further into the factory the element bearers along with Celestia battled with Sombra’s top Hench-pony Victor. Victor was a powerful demon from the underworld that Sombra had risen from the depths of hell itself to help him conquer Equestria.

The demon fired a blast of molten lava at the group and Celestia formulated a magical shield around them and effectively stopped the damaging lava. Twilight produced a teleportation spell and transported them away to a safer location and launched a volley of energy shots at the demon. It had literally no effect other than pissing it off further.

Back in the other end of the factory Jack and Luna heard the commotion and were beginning to dash off that way but stopped when they were ambushed by a large group of shadow guards.

Luna’s Gatling whirred to life and spat out a stream of 7.62mm rounds while Jack’s M60 rattled out the same ammunition. The guards were torn apart and stood literally no chance against the onslaught.

Jack checked his watch, they had spent the last little while fighting and it was now 3pm in the afternoon. “Shit” Jack cursed and Luna looked to him, “What’s wrong?” she asked and Jack pointed to his watch. “We have to save Christmas but we need enough time for The Magical Mare to give out presents.

They approached a door where they thought they heard the fighting come from and kicked down the door only to see their friends in a dire situation. Celestia had been knocked down, Twilight had exhausted herself and the others stood no chance against the behemoth of a demon which was now lumbering towards them.

“Hey hothead, hey bozo… over here” Jack yelled out and the demon turned its attention to Jack. They demon let out a terrifying roar and lumbered towards Luna and Jack. “On 3?” Jack asked and Luna looked to him. “3!” Luna said and dashed away, “Shit” Jack cursed and darted away in the opposite direction.

Jack fired his M60 and drew the demon’s attention to him as Luna went to check on the others. The rounds punched through its volcanic rock body and it let out a howl of pain as fire burst from its mouth. “Figures I get the leviathan or whatever the hell this is” Jack muttered as he continued to shoot the monster in the face.

The giant behemoth fell to its knees and Jack dropped his M60 and charged up beside the monster, pulling out both combat knives and using them like ice picks to scale up the monster’s side. The beast howled in pain and tried to swat Jack but it was too clumsy and slow.

Jack easily reached the monster’s head and drove both the knives into the demon’s head which resulted in another pained howl. Jack unholstered both his Desert Eagles and unloaded both pistols into the beast’s skull. The rounds were surprisingly powerful enough to kill it, Jack was thinking he might need a holy relic weapon or something but these worked just fine.

The beast let out a final howl as it collapsed, Jack rode on the beast’s head and the head conveniently collapsed right in front of the group. Jack hoped off the beast and Rainbow Dash’s mouth gaped open, “That’s… that’s impossible, we fought that thing for like an hour and didn’t even scratch him and Jack just up and annihilated the guy” Rainbow Dash exclaimed and Jack simply shrugged.

“Celestia” Luna gasped and Celestia groaned and looked to her younger sister. “Oh my sister… I thought I told you not to come here” Celestia groaned in pain. “Please forgive me sister, but I needed to follow Jack” Luna replied and Celestia smiled. “Dearest sister… you just said I, rather than we” Celestia groaned and Luna smiled. “Jack has really taught me some wonderful things about the holidays, sister” Luna told her happily as a tear rolled down her cheek.

“Luna… it is forbidden love” Celestia replied and Jack gulped, “Eh, no-one’s talking about love here” Jack stuttered but Celestia simply gave him a weak smile. “My dearest Jack… I see it in both your eyes, you love each other very much… but your love could never be simply because of Luna is an… an alicorn… and she’d live… a lot longer than you… when you die of natural age… she wouldn’t and would have to live… without her soul mate for the remainder of her life… please don’t be foolish” Celestia gasped.

“Sister… we know what love is, please let’s not talk of this now, we have a shadow king to stop” Luna said with a weak smile but Celestia shook her head. “No… sister, you mustn’t hate… you mustn’t give in to the evils that have corrupted so many souls… rule Equestria with a passionate hoof… not an iron one” Celestia gasped. “No sister… please we can help you” Luna replied but Celestia’s head leaned back and she passed away.

“Oh shit” Jack muttered, he put his hand on Luna’s shoulder and he wept for the passing of the princess. He wiped his tears away and unslung his shotgun just as Shining Armor and his remaining 4 guards entered the room. Jack pumped the Spas and stepped back from Luna. He looked to the others, “I’ll stop Sombra, I promise” Jack said and dashed off, looking for the shadow king.

Battle of titans

Jack kicked down a door and inside sat Sombra as he chuckled to himself at the sight of Jack’s primal entrance. “Ah Jack… it’s good to see you on this fine evening” Sombra chuckled as he stood up. Jack unbuckled his combat harness and dropped the shotgun bandolier along with his revolvers and handguns to the floor. Pulling off the combat ballistic vest he also managed to unsling his Spas 12 and lastly he removed his bowie knife from its ankle sheath.

“Ah… so you want a fair fight, so be it” Sombra laughed and Jack snarled “Knowing you you’ll probably use some sort of magic to your advantage” Jack retorted and Sombra simply shrugged. “You know me too well, Jack” Sombra laughed and a blast of energy shot through his horn and slammed Jack through a wall and into another room where an alicorn sat, tied up in a chair and had obviously been beaten severely. “Please child… come here” she moaned and Jack stumbled to his feet and staggered over. The alicorn looked at him with deathly eyes, “Child I am… the Magical Mare of Hearth’s warming… before I pass I need to know… if you had one wish what would it be?” The Magical Mare asked and Jack didn’t need to be asked twice.

“A friend of mine, Celestia, was killed recently… I would wish her back to life” Jack replied and the Magical Mare’s horn glowed and a burst of energy flew away out the door. “Oh Jack” Sombra laughed as he trotted closer towards the hole in the wall. “Child… you are true of heart… and only a true warrior could defeat an evil emperor like Sombra… please… don’t waste your… powers” she said as she stabbed him through the chest with her magical horn.

It was almost as if she had pieced his heart but for some reason his skin wasn’t cut and he didn’t die. The alicorn pulled her horn back and smiled, “Jack… defeat Sombra… save Equestria and Hearth’s warming… you are the hero that Equestria needs to defend it… don’t let Sombra defeat you… or Equestria… will… fall” she said and with that he head drooped down and she passed away. “Hey wait… what the hell did you do to me?” Jack whispered.

A blast of energy struck him from the side and he was thrown across the room but it was as if it didn’t hurt all that much. He landed blissfully on his feet and clenched his fists, his muscles bulged and it felt as if his power was limitless. He felt immensely strong, like he had been given a key to ultimate power or something.

“ARRRRR SOMBRA!” Jack roared and as he continued to roar his power felt as if it was rising even further. The ground shook and gusts of wind began to blow and it was as if Jack was the center of a tornado. “NO, THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE… NOOOOO” Sombra yelled as a dark blue aurora began to surround Jack. Jack roared even louder, reaching the top of his vocal chords and the ground beneath him began to crumble away like it was smooth dirt, the ground began to push away, leaving Jack on the highest point of ground as the powerful gusts broke the flooring, the building shook violently as Jack’s immense power past un-foretold strength levels for any creature or soul.

“It’s impossible” Sombra yelled and looked to the Magical Mare and realized what she had done. “No… no that fate was reserved specifically for me… It can’t be given to you” Sombra roared. Electric energy crackled around Jack as the shaking building felt more like it was in an earthquake, Sombra continued his rant about how it should have been him and Jack continued to roar. Jack’s muscles bulged even further and his biceps ripped through his duster coat, veins bulging out and his chest burst from the confines of his shirt and his duster was reduced to something that looked like a duster coat without sleeves or most of its front.

Finally Jack calmed down a little and the gusts of wind ceased and the ground had destroyed, it looked like a small crater except that were Jack was standing hadn’t been affected. Jack looked to Sombra, his blue eyes seemed to pierce right into the soul of Sombra and his very sight gave Sombra the shivers.

Jack’s muscle mass had expanded 3 times its original size and he now looked ridiculously terrifying, electricity crackled around his body and Jack unclenched his fists and looked to the palms of hands and electricity crackled in his palms.

Jack gasped at the own feeling of his power. “No… no it’s not possible, it should have been me… I’m the most powerful” Sombra screamed and Jack looked to him with a cold look, a blue jagged aurora surrounded him and flashed brilliantly as a testament to his new found might. Sombra sighed “Well no matter… I’ll just have to kill you off before any-pony sees what new powers you have” Sombra muttered and lept at Jack, Jack simply stood there with a straight face as Sombra slammed his hoof as hard as he could into Jack’s face.

Jack didn’t even move an inch and Sombra pulled back his hoof and gasped. Jack rushed forward and slammed his knee into Sombra’s gut and he slammed into the ground with increased momentum. Sombra growled as he got up and spun to Jack. “I’m surprised… I didn’t think you could’ve survive 3 hits” Jack taunted and Sombra spit blood onto the ground, “What do you mean 3? You only struck me once” Sombra hissed and Jack rolled his eyes “Maybe I’ll have to slow it down so you can see it” Jack taunted and once again rushed forward.

Though he was significantly slower this time he was still much too fast for Sombra to react, and just like a flash of lightning slammed his knee into Sombra’s gut but this time he made it apparent that before he had been traveling so fast that his eyes and body reflexes couldn’t tell that Jack had struck him 3 times. Jack slammed his knee into Sombra’s stomach once more then elbowed him in the back of the neck, slamming his body into the ground just like before, all in under a second.

“Feel it that time?” Jack taunted and Sombra stepped back up, “FEEL THIS” Sombra roared and blasted at Jack with an energy shot from his horn. Jack leaned his body to the left and dodged Sombra’s energy blast effortlessly and Jack simply chuckled. Sombra let out a battle cry and charged at Jack. Before Sombra could slam into Jack, Jack simply swatted Sombra with a back hand and sent Sombra flying through a wall and into another room.

Jack stepped through the massive hole in the wall and gave Sombra a disappointed look. “Don’t look at me like that… you haven’t seen my true powers” Sombra yelled and Jack yawned at his threat, “You wouldn’t be taunting me if I had my full power” Sombra hissed. “Fine… get your full power” Jack sighed and Sombra stepped back, his plan to poke at Jack’s pride had won him a gamble that he knew would pay off.

Sombra, in the same manner that Jack had powered up started to roar and a darkened red aurora surrounded his body much like the blue on that surrounded Jack, the only difference was that Jack had electricity crackling around his body as a sign of his power. “Now we can battle like titans” Sombra hissed and Jack stepped his left leg back and brought his hands up in front of him in a combat stance. “Try me” Jack taunted.

Sombra flew forward, somehow gaining the power of flight, and charged Jack. Jack gasped at Sombra’s increased speed and lept to the side and threw a kick into Sombra’s face as he passed. Sombra crashed to the ground but regained his balance and flipped upwards and landed on his hooves.

Jack stepped back and looked to Sombra with a hesitant smile, “Come on Sombra… where’s that power you ranted on about… all I see is some low class martial arts shit” Jack teased and Sombra roared at the insult and his horn flared and a volley of shots blasted at Jack and began erupting, the explosions literally rocked the factory and nearby walls and the flooring was destroyed by the immense destruction of Sombra’s blasts.

“Take that” Sombra spat but as the smoke cleared Jack stood there, somehow managing to float in mid-air. “What… how did you…” Sombra gasped and Jack shrugged, “Guess the Magical Mare must’ve given me flying powers as well” Jack replied casually, “No… how did you escape my attack” Sombra gasped and Jack gave him a curious look, “You aren’t serious… you didn’t think that that attack could kill something did you?… man if that’s your best than you’re screwed” Jack taunted and Sombra’s face turned beat red and veins began to bulge out from his forehead as he began to lose his cool.

“Why is this happening… it should be me… I should be the one with the Magical Mare’s powers not you” Sombra snarled and Jack sighed, “Because you’re evil… duh” Jack said insultingly and pushed Sombra over the edge of his mental limit. Sombra flew through the roof and Jack floated up peacefully to the rooftop of the factory and set himself down on the roof.

Sombra’s horn began to glow an ever darker flare of red and a large energy sphere formulated above him. “From the depths of hell I summon the power to destroy you” Sombra yelled and Jack sighed as he floated himself down to the snowy ground. “Alright… I’ll make a wager, that bomb thingy won’t even put cut my skin” Jack taunted and Sombra simply laughed as his energy ball continued to grow in might.

Further away Luna, Celestia and the rest of the group dashed out and watched as Sombra gained more power. “What the hell is Jack waiting for… that thing has enough power to destroy the entire planet” Celestia gasped and Luna calmed her sister “Jack knows what he’s doing… I know it” Luna replied as a tear rolled down her cheek. For some reason, about 5 minutes ago Celestia returned from the dead and then seconds later the factory began to shake like it was in an earthquake and all that could be heard was Jack’s roaring voice.

“Take… THIS” Sombra yelled and tossed the red energy ball down on Jack. The ball crushed Jack beneath it and began to dig into Equestria’s surface like a drill. “In a few moments that energy ball will explode and destroy Equestria… but I won’t die, no I’ll be far away on Earth, eating burritos” Sombra laughed but suddenly his sneering smile turned to a dire frown as the energy ball began to float back off of Equestria’s surface.

Underneath the deadly ball was Jack, holding it up with one hand. Sombra’s jaw slacked down and he gasped as Jack tossed it effortlessly into the air like a small stone, it began to fly further and further into the air. Jack cupped his hands together in front of him and a sphere of blue energy formulated in the cup of his hands. Jack let out a terrifying roar and a large beam of energy shot out from his hands.

As the beam connected with the ball of deadly energy the two energy sources erupted into a brilliant explosion that was harmless unless you had sensitive eyes. Sombra’s mouth was still gaping open and Jack rushed Sombra at an incredible speed and slammed his fist across Sombra’s jaw and dislocated it.

Sombra staggered back and mustered a powerful blast of energy that took Jack by surprise and launched him back into the factory.

Sombra flew after him but as he entered multiple bursts of energy struck his body and tossed him back into the factory wall. Sombra fell to the ground with a THUD then staggered back to his hooves. Blood dripped down his face and he popped his jaw back into place with grunt of pain.

Jack flew through the air and gave him a flying kick to the chest and Sombra was hurled across the room. Sombra stood up without wary and gave out a thunderous roar, his power rose to try and match Jack’s. His power rose to a power that could conquer planets but was far below the energy output Jack was producing. “How… how is this possible, I have power seeping into my body from the depths of hell itself yet you stand there like my power is a joke” Sombra hissed and Jack shrugged, “Your power is immense but when compared to me” Jack said as he flew through the air and slammed his fist into Sombra’s chest, resulting in a choking gasp and blood splattered out of Sombra’s mouth as he fell to the ground.

“Compared to me… you’re evil and you are a joke” Jack said with a cold, icy tone. Sombra lept up and with an immense power output, blasted Jack with a powerful beam of energy from his horn. Jack flew through the walls of the factory until he caught himself and levitated himself to the ground.

Sombra raced in and Jack held the Spas in his hands, “weapons are useless” Sombra hissed but Jack paid no mind and slung the gun across his back. Sombra charged at Jack with every ounce of strength he had but Jack simply gave him a powerful uppercut that sent him through the roof. Jack flew upwards and as he met Sombra in the sky he held both his fists together and slammed Sombra’s body to the ground. He unslung his shotgun, the electricity emulating from his body began to course downwards into the shotgun.

“It’s over Sombra… the killing, the murdering… everything. You’re done” Jack told him as he lifted the shotgun and pointed it at Sombra. Sombra stood up and his horn began to emulate with one final energy ball. “Don’t even try it” Jack replied, holding the Spas with one hand, pointing down towards Sombra. “Sombra, this is the end of the road for you, it’s a damn shame… maybe you’ll come back one day as… as a better soul, I’d like that… maybe we’ll have a little one on one” Jack said with a smile.

“Don’t give me your pity” Sombra yelled and launched his final blast, Jack pulled the trigger on the shotgun. It was as if the shotgun had become part of his body and it launched a beautifully powerful, rainbow coloured beam towards Sombra. Sombra’s blast was absorbed into the ever powerful blast from the shotgun and the beam slammed into Sombra’s body, he let out one final roar and within a fraction of second his body was vaporized into dust.

Saving Christmas

Jack floated down to the ground and let out a relieved sigh, his muscles relaxed and his powerful aurora disappeared along with the electricity. Celestia was the first to run up beside him, “Oh hey, Celestia… oh man guess Magical Mare’s wish came true” Jack chuckled. “What?” Celestia asked curiously, “Oh well I met the Magical Mare and she said I had one wish so I wished you back to life… kinda seems like something out of Dragon Ball Z” Jack laughed. “Dragon what?” Celestia asked and Jack just shook his hand “Trust me, you wouldn’t get it even if I told you” Jack informed her.

“Jack… your power level was… beyond anything known to Equestria” Celestia began and Jack shrugged, “I can feel the energy seeping off your body now… what happened in the factory?” Celestia asked and Jack shrugged. “Okay well for starters the Magical Mar is… was an alicorn but she died, but before she did she stabbed me in the heart with her horn” Jack replied and Celestia sighed. “Okay… I know that you told me to stay behind but” Jack began but Celestia cut him off “Jack… do you realize what the Magical Mare has done?” Celestia asked in a serious tone.

Jack gave her a curious look, “Brought you back to life?” Jack asked. “No” Celestia told him and Jack guessed again “She… died?” Jack asked, a little uncertain of his comment. “Uhm no, well yes but… she gave you her powers to save Hearth’s warming” Celestia informed Jack as the others ran up to Celestia and Jack. “Jack… it is important to know that now you must be the Magical Mare” Celestia told him and Jack sighed. “Yeah well… I… dammit… WAIT” Jack gasped and Celestia gave him a frightened look.

“Hearth’s warming is tomorrow and I just kind of… blew up the factory” Jack said in a depressed tone. “We can help you with that… there may not be many presents this year but there will be enough for all the ponies on the good list” said a small pony elf. “Okay… so where are the reindeer?” Jack asked and the elf led the group to the stables where the reindeer had been kept, or rather it was Pegasus ponies with antlers.

The bodies of the reindeer were strewn across the blood-soaked floor and they had lifeless expressions on their faces. “Well… this sucks” Jack replied, “Jack I have an idea” Luna replied and Jack chuckled “well that’s a first” he teased and Luna gave him a friendly punch to the arm. “You have the power of flight, am I correct?” Luna asked and Jack sighed “Yes… oh no I am not… don’t even give me those eyes” Jack said but Luna began to give him the puppy dog eyes. “Okay fine… just don’t do that… you know that you can get what you want because I’m a softy and it’s not fair” Jack muttered as he walked over to the sleigh.

Luna grabbed a fake Santa beard and stuffed her red Santa suit with cotton to make her look plump like Santa. “Hey how’d you know what Santa looks like?” Jack asked and Luna pulled out a small photo, “Where’d you get that?” Jack asked and Luna shrugged. “Found it in the glove box of your truck” Luna replied and Jack sighed, remembering that he had a record with a picture of Santa on his sleigh. Jack strapped himself up to the sleigh but Luna shook her hoof. “Ah-ah-ah, you’re not getting off that easy” Luna teased and she pulled out a red button nose. “Oh you did not… no I’m not wearing that” Jack replied as he crossed his arms and turned his head away.

“Pleeeease?” Luna begged, “No… I’m not wearing that ridiculous thing just because Santa had a reindeer with a red nose” Jack told her. But she persisted and kept poking the red nose towards his face. She stepped in front of him and gave a pouty face, “You better not shout, you better not pout, you better not… yeah you get the point” Jack replied as he continued to refuse the nose.

Her eyes grew wide as saucers and tears began to formulate in her eyes. Jack grumbled and grabbed the nose and stuck it on his face. Rainbow Dash laughed hysterically along with Pinkie, but the others simply stifled their laughs. “I despise you” Jack muttered, “Oh no, you love me” Luna said as she hoped in the sleigh. “At least I only have to deal with this for 25 more years… then I can just get old and retire” Jack muttered. “Uhm… Jack I have some bad news for you” Celestia said and Jack rolled his eyes, “Great let me guess I can’t retire until I die” Jack scoffed and Celestia looked to him with a small grin.

“Fine 30 years, then I’ll die and not have to humiliate myself anymore” Jack muttered. Celestia sighed “Jack, when the Magical Mare transferred her powers to you she also gave you the prolonged life of an alicorn” Celestia said with a small giggle and tapped his nose “but don’t worry, the nose looks good on you” Celestia giggled. “Great dressed like a clown for the next thousand years” Jack muttered.

“Well you best hurry if you want to give presents to every-pony on the list” Celestia said and pulled out a ridiculously huge list. Jack sighed and clenched his fists, he powered up slightly, just enough so that he could fly and pull the carriage.

“Well giddy-up Rudolf” Luna teased and Jack pulled away, the sleigh wasn’t heavy for Jack but the sheer embarrassment of wearing the nose made him sigh to himself. “Alright first stop… Crystal Empire” Luna told Jack and he pulled the sleigh as fast as he could towards the Crystal Empire, which actually was an incredible speed of over 300mph.

* * *

The streets of the Crystal Empire were empty, “Okay, where’s this house?” Jack asked and Luna shrugged, “It doesn’t say… it just says Hanky Jones” Luna replied and Jack grabbed for the list but Luna tugged it back while she continued to look at it. “Hey let me see the list” Jack told her but she didn’t listen, “Hey, let me see that damn list” Jack said again but she shook her head “Only Santa is allowed to look upon the list of naughty and nice” Luna snickered.

Jack sat down on his ass and groaned, “Fine then, be like that. I just won’t get you a Christmas present” Jack said, Luna gasped and leaned over the sleigh. “You’re getting me a Christmas present… Ooo can I guess… is it a” she began but Jack shook his hand. “Nope I’m not getting you it anymore… to bad cause it was super awesome” Jack taunted. “Hey that’s not fair… come on please” Luna began but Jack covered his eyes so she couldn’t give him the puppy dog eyes.

“Ha… my new shield is impervious to your stare” Jack laughed playfully but Luna lept on top of him and pried his hands away from his face. “Haha, but I counter your shield with my bypass spell” she laughed and Jack wrapped his leg around her hindleg and rolled their bodies over so he was on top of her. “Haha I counter you spell with… run away” Jack laughed and got up and began to run around the sleigh as Luna chased him.

Quickly losing track of the task at hand the duo played together like 2 children in the snow, quickly forgetting about the presents and making snow angels and even a snow-pony. Jack chuckled to himself but then glanced past the sleigh and remembered the presents. Quickly looking to his watch and realizing it was 10:30pm and they hadn’t even delivered the first present. “Oh shit” Jack muttered and Luna looked to him with a happy grin but then she too remembered that they were supposed to be delivering presents.

Luna pulled up the list, “Okay… Hanky Jones” Luna replied and Jack grabbed the list and looked at it. “Oh shit” he muttered as he looked at the size of the list. “We’ll never have this done by morning… figures the Magical Mare couldn’t have given me a map or something” Jack chuckled. “What are you going to do?” Luna asked and Jack looked to her. “Me… hey don’t forget that you’re the one who wants to be Santa so you make up the plan” Jack laughed as he thought of a possible solution.

“I could keep the moon up longer but no later than 10am” Luna offered but Jack shook his head. “That still doesn’t solve our problem… we don’t know where the hell any of these ponies are” Jack replied then groaned to himself. “Alright that’s it every-pony is on the good list this year” Jack replied and he went to the first house on the street. “Luna… a little help” Jack said and she teleported him inside. Jack started placing the presents under the tree when Luna teleported in with him and pointed to the glass of milk and cookies. “Oh shit… I am not eating the cookies and milk in every house” Jack said but Luna zipped over, pulled down the fake Santa beard and quickly gobbled back the cookies and slurped the milk back and whipped away milk above her lip.

* * *

For the remainder of the night and into the morning Jack and Luna delivered gifts to every-pony in Equestria, stopping at every house, every hut and even stopping to give gifts to the homeless. Each house they went into Luna would share the cookies with Jack, for some reason flying and being in his powered up stated burned more energy so he needed a constant supply of food.

As they finished the night in Manehatten Jack pointed to the huge penitentiary. “Jack… you can’t be serious, we both know that those ponies aren’t good” Luna gasped and Jack shrugged. “Why not” Jack said and pulled the sleigh over top of the penitentiary. With a grin he looked to Luna and she sighed as she teleported them inside the prison. Jack and Luna snuck around the prison and delivered presents to every prison cell. The inmates all had a plates with cookies and milk set out in front of their cells.

Jack went for one of the cookies but Luna snatched it before he could get it and ate it. “Hey I was going to eat that” Jack whispered, Luna shrugged “Well… you can have the milk” she offered and levitated the milk towards him. “I wanted the cookies, it was my turn” Jack complained jokingly. “Fine if you don’t want the milk…” Luna trailed off and drank the milk back. “HEY, that’s not fair” Jack replied and Luna giggled.

“Oh you think that’s funny…” Jack grabbed a cup of milk from another jail cell and drank it back. “Hey that was mine” Luna laughed and Jack gave her a mischievous smile and they both began to run around, tossing presents into the jail cells and grabbing the cookies from each other, not really ever eating them just fighting playfully with each other and making a large mess. They threw a present into the final cell and there was one glass of milk left along with some cookies.

Luna looked to Jack who sighed and Luna squealed with delight as she devoured the cookies and drank back the milk. The prison inmate awoke to the noise they had created on their ‘adventure’ and looked at the present on the floor. “Magical Mare?” the inmate asked tiredly and Jack looked over to the inmate. “Nah… I’m Santa and” Jack began but Luna put her hoof in his mouth. “No I’m Santa and this is Rudolf my lead reindeer” Luna said and the inmate nodded and opened his present. It was a pair of beautiful sparkly pajamas. The inmate’s face was expressionless and he looked up to Luna and Jack.

“Uhm… hope you like it” Luna said uneasily but the inmate burst into tears. “I love it… oh thank you sooo much” the inmate cried as he held the pajamas tightly to his body. “Well our job is” Jack began but suddenly a lone light pierced on their bodies. “HEY DON’T MOVE” screamed a prison officer. Jack nudged Luna and she teleported them away to the sleigh.

The prison alarm blared and prison guards swarmed outside and clustered trying to find the invaders. “Luna hold on tight” Jack told her as he zoomed them away.

Author's Note

Ah but alas I shall have the ending tomorrow morning for Christmas because it's Christmas tomorrow and that coincides with the book ironically... and the book is ironic... happy face :) ahhahaha... I'm entertained way to easily

Christmas day

They had decided to retreat to Canterlot castle for the remainder of the morning until Jack got the energy to fly the carriage back to the North Pole.

Jack kicked the door open to a room and stumbled over to the bed and flopped down, not bothering to take off his wet clothes. “If you don’t mind, I’d appreciate it if you took you clothes off” Luna replied and Jack shot her a look. Luna blushed “I meant… uhm not like that but… could you take your wet clothes off, that way you don’t get my bed wet… along with the carpet and the pillows and the blankets...” Luna told him and Jack kicked his boots of and let out a moan of tiredness.

His duster coat was in need of dire repair along with his pants… well he wasn’t taking off his pants for obvious reasons. He tossed his duster coat to the floor and his groan was muffled by the pillow that he stuffed into his face. He reached into his pant pocket and pulled out a small gift and tossed it to Luna who caught it in her magical aurora. “What’s this?” Luna asked. “An engagement ring” Jack said sarcastically, “that’s a terrible joke” Luna said as she began to unwrap the gift. Under the wrapping paper was a small little casket box.

Jack rolled off the bed and walked over to her as she opened the box revealing a beautiful diamond necklace. She gasped at the sight of it, “Oh Jack… you shouldn’t have” she gasped. “Eh why not?” he asked and she levitated the necklace to Jack. “This is a universal gemstone necklace… one of the rarest types of gems in Equestria” Luna informed him and Jack shrugged. “Yeah well… when I showed it to Rarity she made it sound like a doomsday device or something. Just the way she went on about it made me want to hid it so I hid it in my basement but when we were leaving I grabbed it thinking maybe you’d want it” Jack said casually with a shrug.

“Jack… these are considerably the most rare item in Equestria… this is something you’d give a pony if you were married… are you really certain you wish to give this to me?” Luna asked curiously. “Oh well if you don’t like it just say so” Jack laughed, “No that’s not what I meant” Luna said hastily, Jack rolled his eyes. “Will you help me put it on?” Luna asked and Jack walked over and slid it over her head and around her neck, swishing her mane out of the way. She stepped back and leaned her head to one side “How does it look?” she asked and Jack shrugged. “We could ask Rarity but I think she’d have a seizure if she heard I just gave this to you for a Christmas gift” Jack laughed and sighed to himself “Mare I have no idea how you go around every night, raising and lowering the moon”.

Luna blushed and Jack gave her a weird look. “Well I’m gonna hit the sack” Jack said and began to stumbled towards the bed but Luna grabbed him by the neck and pulled him back. “Huh?” Jack mumbled, Luna pointed upwards where a mistletoe hung from the ceiling. “Hmm I have a terrible feeling that you set that up there” Jack muttered as he looked down to Luna who stood on her hindlegs, her forelegs wrapped around his neck.

“You know… you can’t break my heart now with your extended life thanks to the Magical Mare… maybe you can give me another Christmas present?” Luna asked. Jack still felt a little uneasy about ponies and humans and how it all worked out but he had to admit she was rather cute and he had become quite fond of her.

In the hallways outside Celestia walked with Princess Cadence. “I don’t really want to force them to love each other… it just doesn’t seem right auntie” Cadence whispered but Celestia shook her head. “I know, but the fact that Luna loves him and now that he has extended life it won’t break her heart because he won’t die in a few decades… it was almost as if it was meant to be” Celestia replied but Cadence still felt uneasy about it. “Well auntie, if it was meant to be why not just leave it to be?” Cadence asked and Celestia approached her sister’s door. “Because I don’t want to risk it” Celestia said and without knocking opened the door and led Cadence into the room where Luna and Jack stood under the mistletoe, kissing passionately.

Luna broke away from the kiss and looked to her sister and her niece. “Uhm oh hello sister I was just… uhm showing
Jack… it uhm” Luna stuttered hastily. “Jack… what’s going on here?” Celestia asked in a serious tone. Jack scratched the back of his head “Well, you see… I gave Luna this necklace and it was some special one… so she got me to help her try it on… then there was this mistletoe and… well you know how it works with mistletoe right?” Jack replied and Celestia nodded. “Well in that case… I’ll leave you two alone” Celestia replied and left the room with Cadence.

Celestia closed the door behind and looked to Cadence and shrugged “Guess it was meant to be” Celestia muttered and the 2 of them proceeded down the hallway.

Back in the room Luna turned to Jack and shrugged and the duo begun to furiously make out again. “Luna… it’s weird because you’re a talking horse”

“Alicorn” Luna interrupted him, “Right anyway… I think that I love you” Jack told her and her face turned red as she blushed even more. “Well I know it’s all romantic and all but I gotta go to bed, I’m exhausted” Jack mumbled and flopped himself down on the bed. Luna jumped up onto the bed and cuddled up close to him, wrapping her forelegs around him and resting her head on his chest. She cooed quietly, almost like how a cat purrs. Jack leaned his head down and gave her a kiss to the forehead, though he still found it a little weird that she was a talking… okay she was an alicorn but he was a human, but the thought subsided as he made peace with himself and the fact that he loved her dearly made him feel better. “Merry Christmas Luna” Jack whispered but the beautiful princess was already fast asleep on his chest. He thought to himself how lucky he must be, a princess and a gunslinger that managed to save Christmas… strange but in the end it worked out.

Giving her one last kiss to the forehead he finally called it quits for the morning and leaned his head back against his pillow and passed out.

Across the room there is a small hole in the wall where a giggle can be heard. On the other side of this hole sits Celestia, giggling as she watches her sister and Jack contently. Completely breaking the fourth wall she looks to you and quotes “Have a Merry Christmas” and with that final statement gives you a wink.

Author's Note

Merry Chirstmas everybody and have a happy new year

Prologue

His name was Jack, Jack Paulson. He was 40, he was 6'4" tall, had a large muscular build, his face hadn't aged that much though his face had 2 scars, 1 from his forehead down and the other that went on a diagonal. Though he was born in Canada his family moved to USA and when he was 18 Jack joined the military. He served with distinction for many years and at the age of 40 retired, figuring 22 years in the infantry was enough, and resided to a life of a gunsmith. He mostly stayed to himself but in no way was considered anti-social and if offered he would go out with his friends for a drink or a party.

This all changed last winter, when he was out and about on a daily walk when a flash of light struck him. When he awoke he was greeted by a strange dark forest. After a little exploration he found his way out of the forest and into a town.

At first the town looked to be a ghost town, not a single person was there but suddenly a box landed on him and he noticed some weird horse looking thing with wings in the sky. As it fluttered down to him he realized it had crisscrossed eyes but was rather polite and friendly. Despite being rather freaked out that he was taking to a horse with wings Jack introduced himself and the 2 became quick friends and soon the town became bustling with life.

He was later informed by the local librarian that he was in the town of Ponyville and he was in the lands of Equestria, wherever the hell that was. And after multiple teleportation spells, one of which sent Jack right to the depths of hell, he came to the conclusion that he’d never see his world ever again and that he’d have to live his remaining life in this new world of Equestria.