Most Wonderful Time of the Year
Mecha looked over his house, admiring his decorations. Gingerbread plastered onto his walls via marshmallow plaster, candy-canes for corners and supports, mistletoe hanging from the door, and most importantly, the giant tree... burning in his fireplace!
“Um... dad...?” Sugary Spice said, staring at the giant fireplace he'd installed only to burn the giant tree. “Don't we need a tree to put presents under?”
“Eenope!” Mecha said, taking a bit too much glee from the burning tree. “We've got a perfectly usable non-tree tree to put them under!”
Blinking, Sugary Spice looked through the window to see their Hearth's Warming Eve non-tree tree. Turning back to face her dad, she said, “Really? All your broken mechanical legs fused together? Greed's treasure chest are you cheap!”
“Hey, I'm not cheap, I'm creative!” Mecha retorted. “Besides, it was that or a fake tree tree... and you know I hate trees!”
Shaking her head, Sugary Spice looked back at the giant tree burning in their fireplace, before asking, “Why didn't you chop it up and give it to Wolfgang for his dinner?”
“Because it's pine, and I hate pine,” Wolfgang replied, walking around the corner with a frozen Diable on his back. “By the way, what do you want me to do with Diable?”
Mecha rubbed his chin lightly, before an evil grin appeared on his face. Picking Diable up, Mecha replied, “I know just how to thaw him out...” before walking inside. Sugary Spice and Wolfgang shared a look, before running inside just in time to see Mecha chuck the frozen devil into the fireplace.
“Wrath's flamethrower! What are you doing?” Sugary Spice yelled, rushing forward to the fireplace.
“Two things,” Mecha replied, watching as the color slowly returned to Diable's face. “One, there is no such thing as a flamethrower... yet that is. Thanks for the idea!” At this point, Diable was unfrozen, and let out a content sigh, before his eyes went wide and he jumped out of the fire place, his tail on fire, screaming, “HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT HOT!”
“And two... he's a devil. It's impossible to burn him alive!” Mecha finished, laughing merrily.
Wolfgang sighed, before turning to Sugary Spice, and said, “You dad's crazy.”
“Yeah,” Sugary replied, nodding her head. “Probably more so than Wrath on a battlefield.”
LINEBREAKER
Mecha was going through town, whistling a cheery little tune. Spotting Cheerilee, he grinned, before sneaking behind her and covering her eyes. “Guess who?” he said, chuckling lightly.
“Hmm... I dunno...” Cheerilee started, giggling lightly. “Doctor Whooves?”
“Eenope,” Mecha replied, laughing at his marefriend's sense of humor.
“Oh, you must be Big Macintosh!” she tried again, getting the ponies around them to laugh at the merry couple's fun.
“Wrong again,” Mecha said, “You get one more try before you miss out on your gift.
“Well then,” Cheerilee started, grin visible on her face, “There's only one pony willing to make that threat Mecha!”
Laughing, Mecha removed his hooves from her eyes, before spinning her around and giving her a kiss. “Righty oh!” he said, “How'd you like your gift?”
Shaking her head, Cheerilee replied, “Well enough... but it seemed like it was missing something...”
Raising an eyebrow, Mecha asked, “Really now?”
Nodding her head, Cheerilee's eyes lit up with a mischievous glint, before dragging Mecha under a nearby piece of mistletoe, and kissed him once more, before saying, “Perfect now...”
“You know, I wouldn't have pegged you two as a couple of romantics,” came a familiar voice.
“Twilight, you wound me!” Mecha replied, hoof over his heart. “Don't you know that it's the holiday season? When else can we act like giddy little foals and not be reprimanded for it?”
Shaking her head, Twilight asked, “Aren't you two heading to Minot again to visit your family?”
“Eenope,” Mecha replied, shaking his head. “We celebrated with family early this year since my parents got a cruse that's taking up the whole month as a gift. Which means this year, I get to host a Hearth's Warming Eve party!”
“Did somepony say party?!?” came Pinkie Pie's voice, as she came into view out of the mistletoe. “I want in!”
Chuckling, Mecha told Pinkie, “Feel free to drop by! We'll have some simple holiday games, a white elephant exchange, some drinks both alcoholic and non-alcoholic, and plenty of mistletoe for the couples!”
“Mistletoe?” Spike inquired, speaking up for the first time. “That's the stuff that if you stand under your supposed to kiss who ever is under it with you, right?”
Nodding his head, Mecha replied, “That it is! Have your eye on somepony?”
Rubbing the back of his head and blushing, Spike said, “Well, uh, you know...”
Chuckling, Mecha rubbed Spike's head, saying, “Tell you what, you come on over tonight and I'll see about what I can do about getting you and your intended target under the mistletoe tonight!”
Spike brightened up, asking, “Really?!? You'd do that for me?”
Nodding his head, Mecha added, “Just don't ask for any help with somepony who's already dating somepony else, okay?”
Shaking his head, Spike replied, “Not a problem!” before running off.
“You know he's going to invite Rarity, right?” Twilight asked.
“Oh yeah,” Mecha replied, “I figured as much. Odds are that she'd show up anyways, since Big M is bringing Fluttershy, Applejack is likely to tag along with her brother with Rainbow Dash right behind her. When you throw in the fact hat Pinkie Pie here wouldn't dare miss a party...”
“Your darn right I wouldn't!” Pinkie Pie cut in, poking her hoof in Mecha's chest.
Blinking, Mecha continued, “Anyways... you're showing up since Spike is going, which means Rarity is the only one not already going, and if her friends are going...”
“Then she's going,” Twilight finished, shaking her head. “Well, that makes planning out the holidays so much easier this year.”
“Eeyup!” Mecha replied.
At this point, Cheerilee turned to face Mecha, and asked, “Did Celestia and Luna ever get back to you about whether or not they could make it?”
“Not yet,” Mecha replied, “But I'm expecting...”
Spike suddenly back to the group, passing a scroll to Mecha, saying, “Mail for you!” before running back the way he came.
Shrugging his shoulders, Mecha opened the scroll, before sighing. “They hope to make it,” he started, “But are stuck with last minute paperwork. If they can finish it in time, they'll show up.”
“Well then,” Twilight said, “I'll see you guys later!”
“See you at the party!” Pinkie Pie replied, waving goodbye.
LINEBREAKER
Everypony was gathered right outside Mecha's house, looking up onto the roof. There, sitting in what looked like a mechanized chair was Mecha. Waving to the crowd, he shouted, “Enjoy the pre-party show!” before snapping something into place and swinging around to face the sky.
“Show?” Rainbow Dash asked. “What show?”
“Hay if ah know,” Applejack replied, “In fact, ah think he's the only one who knows!”
At this point, all conversation stopped when a sleigh was spotted, being pulled by nine pegasi. In the sleigh was Mecha's brother Shine Sight, whose horn was glowing as he spoke, voice magically amplified so that all could here him say, “I'll win this time brother! I will deliver you present the classic way!”
“You've failed every year so far, and I intend to see you fail again this year!” Mecha replied, before pulling the trigger on his machine causing it to fire... candy canes.
The pegasi pulling the sleigh swerved to avoid getting hit by the sticky candy, rushing forward. “I know all your tricks brother! I won't fail!” Shine Sight shouted.
“That's what you think!” Mecha replied, before slamming down on a button, causing every candy cane attached to his house to shift into guns similar to the one he was manning, firing upon the sleigh.
“What... are those two doing?!?” Twilight yelled, barely being heard over the noise of the candy cane machine guns.
“Shine Sight's been trying to sneak down Mecha's chimney to deliver his presents for years...” Cheerilee replied, as Mecha bailed from his machine gun in order to hop into another machine. “Mecha stopped him on accident the first year he tried, and did so as a joke the second time. Ever since, they've gotten more and more elaborate in their attempts to either deliver the presents or stop the delivery.”
Pinkie Pie blinked, before saying, “That makes sense.”
BOOM!
Everypony's attention was on Mecha, as he loaded another shell into his cannon, the previously fired shell exploded in mid-air, a large amount of slime narrowly missing the pegasi. “WHAT WAS THAT!” Shine Sight shouted, having been jostled violently by the sudden shift in flight pattern.
“Do you like it!” Mecha laughed, pulling the lever to launch another round. “I tested them out on Celestia herself!”
The pegasi flew straight up, Shine Sight hanging onto the sleigh. “YOU'RE CRAZY!!!” he shouted.
“Old news bro! Old news!” Mecha replied, pulling the lever again, the explosive goo round impacting this time, causing the pegasi to crash, unable to fly with the goo in their feathers. Upon landing, a cage was launched from the housed, capturing them.
“Okay... this is so not worth an extra pay check!” Sorain said, stretching out, his back popping.
“Yeah, you didn't warn us about your crazy brother!” Misty Fly added.
“Look, as far as I knew, all he had was candy cane launchers! The goo grenades are new to me!” Shine Sight replied.
“Do you give up?” Mecha asked, walking up to the cage. “Or do I need to whip out my flamethrower prototype?”
All ten ponies immediately shook their heads, causing Mecha to smirk. “Righty oh then,” he said, “I believe you have something for me?” he asked.
Sighing, Shine Sight passed over a pair of presents. “There, you happy now?”
“Eeyup,” Mecha replied, grin on his face.
“Great, you thwarted your brother once more, could you let us out now?” Misty Fly asked.
“Depends... you guys sticking around for the party?” Mecha asked.
“Will there be pie?” Soarin asked.
“Eeyup,” Mecha replied, nodding.
“Then we're staying!” Soarin said.
Mecha threw a lever, causing the cage to fall apart. “Alright everypony!” Mecha shouted, “Come on in, the show's over!”
No pony moved, until Cheerilee let out a sigh, saying, “Why are we surprised?” and walked in.
Sharing glances, everypony shrugged their shoulders before following her lead and walking inside.
LINEBREAKER
The party was in full swing, and everypony was having a good time. Mecha was smiling, before letting out a shrill whistle. Getting everypony's attention, he announced, “If you brought a present for the white elephant exchange, bring it on over to the next room and let's get started!”
A round of cheers answered him, as a group of ponies made their way towards the room Mecha gestured. Taking seats around the pile of presents, Mecha said, “Normal rules, first pony picks a present and opens it, second pony either opens another present or steals the first pony's present. This keeps going until every last present is opened, and no present can be stolen more than three times or stolen back right away. Any questions?”
“OH! OH! Pick me! Pick me!” Pinkie Pie yelled, hopping about.
“Okay... Pinkie Pie?” Mecha said.
“Can I go first?” she asked.
Laughing, Mecha tossed her a present, saying, “Knock yourself out!'
Catching the present, Pinkie let out a giggle, before opening it. “Aw...” she said, revealing the gift. “What am I suppose to use a bird bath for?”
“Well uh, if you don't need it,” Fluttershy said, grabbing it and sitting down.
“Heeeeey!” Pinkie Pie said, “That works!” before grabbing another present and opening it.
LINEBREAKER
Mecha was the last pony in line, and seeing nothing he wanted (that wasn't already “stolen” three times that is), went and grabbed the last present before opening it. Shaking his head, he asked, “Alright, who's the wise guy who brought a white elephant to the white elephant exchange?”
Everypony laughed before walking back into the main room, a few asking Mecha what was next. With a grin, he told them, “Why, the mistletoe maze of course!”
Upon hearing the word mistletoe, everypony gathered round quick. “It's quite simple,” Mecha started, “Everypony get a partner before heading into the maze. From their, you go about your usual maze business, only every time you hit a dead-end, you'll be under mistletoe and have to kiss before making your way back! First couple through... obviously don't like kissing each other!”
A round of laughter went through the room, and Mecha watched as couples went into the maze; Fluttershy and Big Macintosh, with Fluttershy blushing madly, Applejack and Rainbow Dash, both running into the maze (debatable on whether if they wanted to get through first or find the first dead end), Doctor Whooves and Ditzy Do... and it appeared that Spike had convinced Rarity to go through with him.
“Huh... guess I won't need the mistletoe gun,” Mecha said, as he and Cheerilee walked in.
Raising an eyebrow, Cheerilee asked, “Do I want to know?”
Shaking his head, Mecha replied, “All you want to know is that it was the original plan for me to get Spike's wish of being under the mistletoe with Rarity to come true... didn't think she'd go through the maze with him.”
Laughing, Cheerilee replied, “Speaking of which, aren't we at an advantage since you built this maze?”
“Depends,” Mecha started as the turned the corner, “Does knowing where each and every dead end is count?” before they stopped at the dead-end, finding them selves under some mistletoe.
“Oh, it certainly does,” Cheerilee replied, giving him a quick kiss, “because that means we'll get the most out of this...”
LINEBREAKER
Much to Mecha's and Cheerilee's shock, they weren't the last couple through the maze, despite going to every dead-end in the maze- twice! About ten minutes after they got through, Applejack and Rainbow Dash stumbled through the exit, both with silly grins, and Rainbow Dash wearing AJ's hat. “Best... Maze... Ever!” Rainbow said, leaning into Applejack.
Blinking, Mecha shrugged before making his way into the main room, only to blink when he entered.
Apparently, every full grown mare and stallion had been in the maze, for there was no other explanation for how the fillies and foals had gotten a hold of the alcohol without anypony stopping them. As it was, Sweetie Bell, Applebloom, and Scootaloo were all under a piece of mistletoe, arguing how it worked when three ponies where under it instead of two, bottles of hard apple cider laying empty next to them.
Snips and Snail were both unconscious next to the fireplace, both with giant lumps on their heads and what appeared to be... a giant slab of iron and large log of oak laying next to them, origins completely unknown, and Wolfgang gnawing on the log.
Finally, Lively Spirit and Sugary Spice were both watching the scene, shaking their heads with a bottle of 130 proof moonshine in hooves, Sugary Spice saying, “Bunch of lightweights.”
“Cut them some slack,” Lively Spirit replied, taking a sip from her bottle. “This is their first time drinking.”
“That doesn't excuse this!” Sugary Spice said, gesturing towards the scene in front of them. “I mean, come on! Come on! Come on!*”
Mecha cleared his throat, causing the two fillies to turn and face him. Raising an eyebrow, Mecha asked, “Who gave you permission to drink?”
“No one, which is one hundred percent legal as this is a private, non alcohol-selling premise, due to Ponyville law 21, section G, subsection 18**,” Sugary Spice replied, sipping her drink.
Mecha glared at her for a few seconds, before nodding his head. “I assume you've been sneaking drinks for a while then since you're not blathering like those three or out cold like Snips and Snails?”
“Eeyup,” Sugary Spice said.
“And what about you?” Cheerilee asked Lively Spirit. “I know I don't keep alcohol around at home, so why are you so tolerant of it?”
“My parents used to run a brewery,” Lively Spirit started, “And we'd often try the newest batches together.”
Sighing, Cheerilee rubbed Spirit's head, muttering, “What am I going to do with you?”
At this point, the clock stuck midnight, startling everypony. Shaking his head, Mecha yelled out, “I think that's the cue for you to leave! I hope everyone of ya had a good time, but it's time for you to skedaddle! You don't have to go home, but you can't stay here!”
Gathering up their jackets, hats, and presents, everypony began to leave, making sure they had their right foals, and saying goodnight to their friends. When everypony had left, Mecha chuckled, before giving Cheerilee a kiss, and saying, “Happy Hearth's Warming Eve...”
*If you can name the character and show this quote is from, you'll be eligible for an OC in your choice of the prequel Past the Gates or the yet-unnamed sequel.
**This is in-fact the law in 6 states- however I do not encourage underage drinking in any way shape or form.