Equestrian Death Battle

by The Rubber Brony

Rating: teen
Tags: Dark, Alternate Universe, Other, Original Character, Comedy, Random, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 25847

Inspired by RLYoshi's series, two oppositions battle it out to see who the winner is.

Inspired by RLYoshi's series, two oppositions battle it out to see who the winner is. Analysis' are done on the two and then the story of the battle begins. Oppositions can come back from the dead and OC battles are also done. Join the two pony researchers, Milky Wings and Static Horn as they research the pony battle.

Published 2013-01-02 18:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2013-06-03 17:10:45 UTC

Battle 1: Mane 6: Battle Royale

NOTE: THE FOLLOWING IS AN INSPIRATION OF RLYOSHI'S WORK. THE MAIN IDEA COMES FROM RLYOSHI

They're the Mane 6. The elements of harmony. They have managed to defeat powerful foes but which one of them is the most powerful.First there's Twilight Sparkle, Princes Celestia's most prized student

Applejack, the farm girl.

Rainbow Dash, the cloud clearer and Wonderbolts tryout

Rarity, the dressmaker

Fluttershy, the animal hugger

and Pinkie Pie, the party animal.

I'm Milky Wings and he's Static Horn, And it's our job to analyze their weapons armor and skills to find out who would win a death battle.

Twilight Sparkle

Pony Type: Unicorn

Special Talent: Magic

Occupations: Librarian, Student

Element: Magic

Princess Celestia's most prized student

Suffers from OCD

Knows a variety of spells

Terrible Physical Fighter

Twilight Sparkle was born gifted and is a prized student of one of the rulers of her kingdom, Princess Celestia

When she was a filly she went to a gifted school run by Princess Celestia for her talent in magic.

Due to being mostly anti-social, Twilight has taken it upon herself to be very intelligent, knowing a variety of spells from books she read when she was just a filly.

Not just when she was a filly though. Even today, she's still learning spells and knows a lot.

WIth that in mind, you'd think Twilight would be unstoppable...

Far from it. Despite knowing many spells, she has no physical ones. And none of the spells she knows can even kill anything.

The closest she has is her rays which can not kill the opponent but stun them, as shown with the changeling fight.

She also her forcefield which covers her terrible defenses. When used it penetrates all attacks until Twilight turns it off.

Then there's her teleportation spell, able to move her to a different location. As we've seen before, it only moves her when she's completely focused and it can only teleport her to a place she can see in her head.

She also knows the levitation spell. Able to lift objects or ponies and move them up and down, or back and forth.

Her most recent spell learned is her gravitational spell.

This spell can cause Twilight to twist the laws of gravity. Looks like Pinkie Pie's got some competition.

But it doesn't end there. From her own mentor, Twilight managed to learn dark magic, able to find hidden locations and able to project a dark memory.

Even more to say. Twilight has transmutation powers, able to transform an object into something else.

Along with that, she has her want it need it spell, able to make ponies addicted to a certain object.

Then there's her spell to make ponies walk on couds. This makes her even with certain pegasi. Going back to not doing physical spells, she really can't. She can't punch or kick very well. This is why she uses magic in the first place to gain an advantage.

Along with this, Twilight is very accident prone and is not very lucky most of the time.

But she still has some good qualities. She is the leader of the group and as such, normally plans out things for them. And yet, her strategy is still not very good.

While Twilight has good strategy, sometimes, things don't exactly go in her favor. When this happens, she normally starts to lose some intelligence and rushes in hastily without thinking of the consequences.

There's some good reasons though. Missing a deadline of a report on friendship and going back in time to fix a problem we were all expecting because Twilight overreacts to everything. Just kidding, these reasons are terrible.

As such, Twilight suffers from OCD.

And her friends are fully aware of it, especially Applejack. Hah, she moved the ink one inch and Twilight reacted.

Back on topic, while Twilight has OCD, bad physical and defense tactics, is accident prone, and has a complete lack of strategy, there's her biggest flaw of all for battle - she can't fully complete a task without her friends.

But hey, atleast she has really good intelligence, great magic, and knowledge. Too bad that knowledge is being wasted on books and not thinking of something to do if a frog is falling, if she's about to fall into a ditch, if mud's about to splash on her, if she's about to get hit by an opening door, if she's about to get hit by an opening door a second time, if she's about to fall from a door that hit her, if she's about to get stung by many bees, if she's about to fall down a count of 10 flights of stairs and falling unconscious, if a plant pot, anville, pile of hay on a cart, and a piano are falling at the same time, and if she's about to fall on two rocks and then hit against a wall.

"Clock is ticking, Twilight. Clock.Is.Ticking!"

Applejack

Pony Type: Earth Pony

Special Talent: Physical Farming Work

Occupation: Farmer

Element: Honesty

Best physical fighter

Is honest and a hardworkwer

Is Skilled in Rodeos, Herding, Apple Bucking, Rope Swinging and other farming skills.

Suffers from stubbornness

Has Powerful Kicks

Applejack. Born as a filly, she learnt the ways of farming, being living and raised in a barn.

Not joking.

She has learnt a variety of farming skills growing up.

Like her rope. Used to herd animals and catch them. The have been used to hold on to ponies. The rope has huge accuracy and is able to catch even an agile Rainbow Dash in the sky. If I threw a rope in the sky it would fall. If a human can't do it, how can a pony do it?

Because Applejack.

...Oh yeah.

That's not all. She can use her rope to catch an entire tree and bring it up.

Holy shit!

And it's not just ropes she has good accuracy on. It has good accuracy because of the way it's swung. It has good accuracy because Applejack has good accuracy. She can find the right place to throw it and get it right. This is proven from the fact that Applejack has good accuracy with other things she throws. She can also jump very high over hurdles and with these skills has won a ribbon in every rodeo match she's ever done. This means that Applejack also has decent speed. But then there's her most powerful weapon. Despite being a farmer, Applejack's best weapon isn't a tool at all. It's her kicks.

These bad boys have the power to kick an apple tree and make all the apples fall. They're also powerful enough to kick small rocks at a large distance. Like... a freaking pro.

The reason that Applejack has this powerful of kicks is because she was raised in it. She has been kicking her whole life because she has always bucked apple trees. But hearing this, just like Twilight, Applejack sounds even more unstoppable.

She has some flaws just like all of the Mane 6.

She is very stubborn and even when tired, will continue to push herself to the limit. And while she has learnt to properly gain help from others, she still has stubbornness as a proper character trait. She also hates to lose. When she once didn't come first in a rodeo competition but still earnt some ribbons, she was still dissapointed. Another thing, Applejack is definitely the most mature of the six, with Twilight the most intelligent but one of the least mature. That would mean Applejack isn't very intelligent. She doesn't even understand the word French when Apple Bloom speaks in it. Or simple math that Big Mac can solve.

And she's friends with a french pony who's the most fanciest out of all of them and another pony that knows the square route of 546. Back on track, she's also stubborn. Pushing herself to the limit until she get's tired. Wow, Applejack's almost as bad as Rainbow Dash when it comes to losing.

And with Applejack always pushing herself, she still tries to be a perfectionist.

She's also with her bucking skills, the best physical fighter of the six.

With all that in mind, she seems very powerful with not much battle flaws. Sounds great. I only have one question.

Yes?

How does she always have that rope with her?

Giant hat?

"How do you like them apples?"

Rainbow Dash

Pony Type: Pegasus

Special Talent: Speed

Occupations: Cloud Clearer, Student at Wonderbolt Academy

Element: Loyalty

Has arguably the best speed out of anyone in Equestria

Suffers from narcissism

Can change the weather and when dashes leaves a rainbow trail behind

Rainbow Dash, as a filly, was a member of Flight Camp, a training facility in Cloudsdale for pegasi fillies. Since then, speed and flying fast has been Rainbow Dash's best quality. As a filly, she learnt that she was naturally a strong flyer.

Now she's still fast and agile and idolizes the Wonderbolts. She aspires to join them one day and become their leader.

Most of her skills are revolved around speed. She can clear clouds better than an average pegasus.

And that's not all she can do with clouds. She has managed to sit on them and move them with her, well ass, without even flying.

And even with not flying but just riding on a cloud, she's still naturally fast.

Speed is her greatest strength and defense. She can easily avoid attacks with her speed and build up enough speed to attack.

By calculations, her speed can reach a highest of Mach 10.

Wow. And I always thought Sonic The Hedgehog was the fastest.

Her wing power, according to Hurricane Fluttershy, is 16.5

Theirs one weapon though that's not to do with speed. She is a black belt in karate and has supposedly trained for a long time. Wow. Applejack actually has competition with her legs. This pony's awesome.

Not quite. Out of all the Mane 6, she has the most flaws. Just like Applejack, she's always pushing herself to the limit. She hates losing, even more so than Applejack. She is narcissistic and is a strong boaster. She normally gets arrogant and brags how she's better than everypony. She is very immature and arguementative. But this doesn't stop her from pulling out her most powerful and unstoppable weapon - Sonic Rainboom. This is what makes her reach Mach 10. She has managed to save lives, win races, and destroyed a barn in one go. Not just that, but when the sonic rainboom is utilized, Dash manages to break the sound barrier. There's even a circle representing it when she goes through it.

And even with all her flaws her element is almost hard to believe from what I said. Rainbow Dash's element is loyalty. She never backs away from a task given by her friends. She may be cocky, arrogant and a tiny bit annoying on occasion but she puts her friends before anything else.

Wait, I just realised something.

What?

When she pulls out her strongest weapon, she breaks the sound barrier. When Sonic pulls out his strongest weapon, he breaks the light spectrum. Which is faster, light or sound?

Uh... let's, just, move on to Rarity.

"Never fear, your friendly neighbourhood Rainbow Dash is here!"

Rarity

Pony Type: Unicorn

Special Talents: Gem Finding, Dressmaking

Occupation: Dressmaker

Element: Generosity

Is skilled in karate

Is prone to mental breakdowns

Has the ability to use her feminity to her advantage

Creative

Rarity, as a filly, was a junior dressmaker. She used to make outfits for a school play. She wanted the outfits to be better but couldn't think of anything. But she learnt that her horn was naturally able to find gems. Since then, her career is a dressmaker in Ponyville and hopes to be famous for dressmaking.

Out of all the ponies, she has the least amount of weapons. Well Rainbow Dash doesn't have many either but we mean that Rarity doesn't have much power to use to her advantage.

She doesn't exactly have much power to use. Being a dressmaker and mostly doing dress spells, she doesn't know that many. She has levitation, and can manipulate magic. which she learnt from dresses and can find gems from another place. But that's really the only magic she knows.

However, a good thing about Rarity is that she can manipulate more than one object at once, without even looking at them.

Physically on the other hand, she's pretty powerful for a unicorn. Just like Dash, she's skilled in karate. She also suffers from a short fuse. So when she's angry, watch out.

Rarity is also very resourceful. She can pick a few pieces of equipment and can manage to use them all to her

advantage. Her creativity comes from her years of dressmaking. She also, just like Applejack, has really good accuracy when using objects.

She also wears scarves, her most technical weapon, able to deal with cold weather, although this isn't really a weapon. Uh...

Her punches, yeah. In the changeling battle that's what she used. So that means it's not just chops, it's punches. Back to her dresses, because she always tries fitting the deadline with them, she gets thing done fast and to the point.

She's also the best at stealth out of all the six. Even having a costume for it. With her getting things done pretty fast, her stealth is more than decent.

However, while she's resourceful and creative, with her feminine behaviour, when she get's even a bruise, she becomes either ashamed and distraught, or if she's concentrated on a fight, even more concentrated and angry. So in any case, her defenses aren't too strong. She also has a limited battle supply since she's really not the battling type. She's also prone to mental breakdown if she fails at something. But let's see how she'll turn out.

On the bright side, Rarity carries needles. Lots... of needle.

"Look upon me Equestria, for I.Am.Rarity!"

Fluttershy

Pony Type: Pegasus

Special Talents: Animal Carer, The Stare

Occupation: Animal Carer

Element: Kindness

Known mostly for being shy and quiet

Weak flyer

Switches simultaneously between quiet to too assertive

Fluttershy is... shy.

She's normally known to be shy. Other than that, she's known to be a weak flyer. Although she has improved over time. As a filly, just like Rainbow Dash, she trained in Cloudsdale where she was picked on by everypony but Rainbow Dash.

She normally switches between shy and assertive all the time. Continuity's been helping her more and more lately though. But there's one fatal problem with her assertiveness, Fluttershy is very apologetic. After being assertive, she'll apologise straight after. She also never says her ideas. It's not because she's hiding to reveal them later on as a surprise. It's that she never mentions her ideas because she normally get's rid of them straight away.

Just like Rarity, she doesn't have much weapons to use to her advantage. Despite that, her most powerful weapon is her stare. She can use it to make animals do her bidding. Although it has been shown that it doesn't work on ponies but more, like Twilight's magic rays, simply temporarily stun them.

Does she have any weapon with no flaws?

Not really. She hates to fight, even more than Rarity. She will leave a fight the first chance she gets.

Damnit she's adorable. And yet she still doesn't have a chance. I'll miss you Fluttershy.

"Oh, Fluttershy. You're such a loudmouth."

Pinkie Pie

Pony Type: Earth Pony

Special Talent: Happiness

Ocupations: Cupcake Seller, Baker, Cheering Other Ponies Up

Previous Occupation: Rock Farmer

Element: Pinkie Pie

Can defy physics

Can defy gravity

Can break the fourth wall

Is the comic relief of the show

Laughs about nearly everything remotely funny

Pinkie Pie - full name Pinkamena Diane Pie - was  surprisingly a sad filly growing up. She lived on a rock farm with no happiness but after seeing a rainbow, managed to gain a part of her lost. Since then, she has been the happiest pony in Ponyville, having a skill of cheering up others.

So with happiness being her main skill, and with her being an earth pony, you'd think she'd be the one with the worst fighting skills? Wrong.

With Applejack, what makes up for her being an average earth pony is that she has farming skills. What Pinkie makes up for as an Earth Pony is her ability to occasionally do every single thing. She has no logic for any action she does. And that's why she's awesome.

Despite her lack of weapons being an earth pony, her main weapon is breaking the fourth wall.

She still has some artillery though. Like cake, used to blind the opponent.

Or the party cannon. When moved, it has the strength to knock down others. It shoots deadly confetti. It also is known for being the greatest thing in the universe.

But she does have a flaw. She is immature. Being as childish as she is, Pinkie isn't very strategic. And as we've seen with her fourth wall breaking, she doesn't exactly realise that she's breaking the fourth wall most of the time. When other characters do it, like Iron Will, Pinkie looks confused. She just goes along with whatever occurs. Another problem is that she's not a battling type. She's very gullible and easy to fool, simply because she acts like a child. Her fourth wall breaking powers have also never been seen to hurt anypony. And out of all the ponies, Pinkie has had the least amount of battle experience. See, because she lived on a rock farm for her childhood, her life then and now has had no type of training unlike the others.

With Pinkie, you don't know what'll happen.

Last thing to mention, even with Pinkie's happiness, when she's not fully noticed, she becomes sad and quickly turns to insanity. And no, we're not going by fanon. We're going by the canon of the show. It is unknown whether Pinkie has this kind of power in her actual personality, but her ass can really crush a pony. Her alter ego also has good defenses, with Rainbow Dash not even able to drag it. Plus, having an alter ego and being insane, maybe she does have the power to kill ponies.

Yeah. WIth the real Pinkie, she wouldn't kill anypony. I just have one question. Why do they call her alter ego Pinkamena Diane Pie if that's her actual full name?

Uh... let's just get on with the battle.

"What kind of welcome party would this be if it were quiet? I mean, duh, bo-ring. You see, I saw you when you first got here, remember? You were all, hello, and I was all, [gasp], remember? You see I never saw you before, and if I never saw you before that means you're new, 'cause I know every pony, and I mean every pony in Ponyville, and if you're new, then it meant you haven't met anyone yet, and if you haven't met anyone yet, you must not have any friends, and if you don't have any friends then you must be lonely, and that made me so sad, and I had an idea, and that's why I went [gasp], 'I'll just throw a great big ginormous super-duper spectacular welcome party and invite everyone in Ponyville'. See? And now you have lots and lots of friends!"

Alright the six combatants are set. let's end this debate once and for all.

IT'S TIME FOR AN EQUESTRIAN DEATH BATTLE!

A field outside The Everfree Forest had a breeze whistling from the wind. The rainbow pegasus Rainbow Dash dashed into the battlefield, with a determined look as she flew in midair, waiting for her opponents. A magic burst appeared in front of her. Twilight Sparkle used a teleportation spell to show herself. Applejack galloped in fast, carrying a rope in her mouth, ready to attack with it. Rarity made a grand entrance in a stealth outfit, to fit the scenery. Pinkie Pie hopped in happily and reached her arms out wide to the outside of the battlefield and grabbed her party cannon out of nowhere. Fluttershy came in last, walking in slowly, not flying.

FIGHT!

Rarity immediately hid in the bushes. Fluttershy flew up to hide in the clouds not wanting to watch terror happen. Pinkie Pie hopped happily around the battlefield, managing to carry the string on the party cannon with her mouth.

This left Rainbow Dash, Twilight and Applejack. Twilight noticed Rainbow Dash above her and created a force field spell. Rainbow Dash immediately went for Applejack instead. Applejack defended the shot by bucking Rainbow Dash away and crashing her against Twilight’s force field. Twilight turned off her force field and fired a ray at Rainbow Dash, stunning her.

Twilight pushed Rainbow Dash down with her hooves. Rainbow Dash bit Twilight’s hooves and sent her flying as Twilight crashed on the ground. Rainbow Dash zoomed up high. Twilight noticed Applejack galloping towards her. Twilight quickly thought and teleported away.

The unicorn appeared to Pinkie. Twilight shot a ray at Pinkie which Pinkie jumped away from to dodge, as she normally hopped happily. Twilight glared at her happy-go-lucky foe. Twilight grew annoyed and levitated her foe and threw her forward. Twilight got her horn ready and turned a patch of grass into a wall, with Pinkie slamming into it.

Rainbow Dash had flew up high, not noticing Fluttershy along the way. Rainbow Dash was up high and zoomed down fast into Applejack, unexpectedly. Applejack could hear the breeze Dash was making with her wings, so Applejack got her legs ready for a kick. Rainbow Dash charged into the legs, injuring both herself and Applejack. The two raised up simultaneously and punched both of each other with their hooves.

The injured Pinkie lifted herself up and shot out of her party cannon at Twilight. Twilight teleported away from the attack in an unknown area.

Pinkie was bored of her foe. She hopped away with her party cannon and tried shooting it at the others. Fluttershy was already in the clouds and quickly flew to another one. As the ammo came to Applejack and Rainbow Dash, the two dodged too. Applejack jumped using her reflexes and Rainbow Dash flew up fast away. The confetti managed to hit Rarity who was hiding in a bush.

Pinkie Pie hopped over to her, completely ignoring Twilight. She helped Rarity up from the ground but Rarity immediately kicked her away and chased after Pinkie fast while Pinkie hopped away slowly, easily avoiding Rarity.

Rainbow Dash was speeding fast but accidentally bumped into Fluttershy, the yellow pegasus blocking Rainbow’s view of any potential attackers. Rainbow Dash finally noticed Fluttershy and went for an attack by building up speed against her. Fluttershy crashed onto the ground. Rainbow Dash knocked Fluttershy with her hooves, but took her time slowly, expecting to win. Fluttershy thought of this as a tease and turned angry. Fluttershy crashed fast into Rainbow Dash. Fluttershy raised her tail and slapped Rainbow Dash. Her tail grabbed RD and threw her in the air.

Rainbow Dash sped away fast fearfully. Fluttershy nodded to herself. Fluttershy noticed Rarity chasing Pinkie. Fluttershy took her anger out on Rarity and popped in fast. Rarity heard her, and grabbed a needle to defend herself.  Rarity gave a fearless face, frightening the yellow pony. Rarity whispered into Fluttershy's ears while looking at Pinkie Pie. Fluttershy began to go back into her frustrated personality, and sped after Pinkie Pie, while Rarity noticed Twilight, as she tried to recover her magic. Rarity levitated Twilight unexpectedly, but Twilight tried breaking the spell with her own magic. The two charged at each other with all of their power.

Fluttershy followed Pinkie Pie in close pursuit, who looked a little bit frightened. Pinkie Pie immediately ran off fast, easily escaping Fluttershy. Fluttershy stubbornly searched for Pinkie.

Applejack swung her rope and threw it at Rainbow Dash, who was caught by the rope by her legs, which were the closest to get. The rope tugged on Rainbow Dash as she tried to let go. Applejack tugged harder. So much so, that one of Dash’s hooves peeled off her skin. Rainbow Dash wasn’t able to stand as well. Applejack walked towards her to finish her off but noticed the angry Fluttershy charging towards them. Applejack gasped and threw Rainbow Dash into Fluttershy as a shield. Fluttershy charged into Rainbow Dash, still running, not breaking a sweat. The injured Rainbow Dash fell to the floor after Fluttershy's assault. Fluttershy continued to charge into the southern earth pony. Applejack thought for a second and had an idea. Applejack took this time to buck Fluttershy away. Applejack grabbed her rope and strangled Fluttershy to death while she had the chance.

Applejack laughed but saw Rainbow speed into her, using her wings. Applejack crashed back. Applejack grew angry and kicked Rainbow Dash away. Applejack was tired though. She had bucked Rainbow Dash more than once, tiring her out, yet she still felt determined.

Meanwhile, Twilight and Rarity had crashed into each other with their strength. Rarity had overcome Twilight's physical strength, and bounced up into the air to body slam Twilight. Twilight teleported to avoid the attack, and teleported to Pinkie Pie.

Pinkie Pie got her party cannon ready, to spread her cheer. Twilight created a forcefield to protect herself, yet some of the confetti got through anyways. Twilight levitated Pinkie Pie and tossed her forward, landing her on the ground.Twilight lit her horn up, and sparked it at PInkie Pie, turning her head into an orange. Twilight grabbed a nearby stone, and beat Pinkie Pie's head down with it. Twilight then ate the orange to give herself energy.

Rainbow Dash collapsed, low on her strength. Applejack galloped towards her but was levitated by Rarity. Twilight shot a couple of rays at her three remaining enemies. Rainbow Dash, with her quick reflexes, dodged, but didn’t fly too high. Rarity levitated te incoming rays and tossed them back at Twilight, while she wasn't looking. Applejack was shot by though, having nothing to defend herself.

Twilight was now shot also, and Rarity noticed her two opponents. She levitated Twilight, and Applejack up in the air. Twilight sensed this though, and recovered. Meanwhile, Applejack was attacked. Rarity threw Applejack up high, as she spun around in the air. Applejack crashed to the ground, dead.

Rainbow Dash noticed Twilight, and Rarity on the ground, beside each other, glaring in anger. Rainbow Dash dashed down on the two. Rarity got a rock ready, and threw it up at Rainbow Dash, while Twilight lit her horn to ready a spell. The rock beat the rainbow colored mare down on the ground, as Twilight casted a want it need it spell on Rainbow Dash to fall in love with the rock, not paying attention on anything else. Twilight noticed Pinkie Pie's party cannon nearby. She manipulated the object to bring it over. Meanwhile, Rarity lifted Rainbow Dash to fall into the cannon. Rarity shot the cannon. Rainbow Dash came out, head first, decapitated.

Rarity and Twilight stared each other down. Twilight shot many rays at Rarity, but Rarity simply managed to levitate all of them, as she shot them at Twilight. Twilight cast a forcefield spell to defend herself, as the rays vanished. Rarity cast a spell to locate gems, and ended up finding a few. This time though, she tossed the objects in different directions. Two of the gems shot forward. Twilight cast a forcefield spell. When the two gems failed, Twilight turned off her spell. However, it turned out that Rarity had trapped Twilgiht, as it turned out that she shot a few gems in the air, slamming on Twilight, and putting her in a trance.

Rarity grabbed hold of Twilight's injured head, and tossed it with her hoof, crushing Twilight to the ground. This second blow caused Twilight to recover. Twilight teleported away from where she was, confusing Rarity. After this, Twilight landed from the sky, and shot a ray to stun Rarity. Twilight noticed Applejack's nearby rope beside her dead body, and used it to break Rarity's spine, and kill her. Twilight stood proudly over the dead carcass of Rarity.

K.O.

Holy shit. That was awesome. I was not expecting this.

Let's briefly go over everypony's death. First dead was Fluttershy. While she managed to lose her temper, and go berserk on a few ponies, keep in mind that Fluttershy is also very gullible. Applejack used her tactics to overpower Fluttershy, because, compared to Applejack's strength, Fluttershy is nothing.

Pinkie Pie died next... in a rather, gruesome way. Twilight used her magic skills to turn Pinkie Pie's head into an orange. What more could the pink pony want? Unfortunately, Twilight killed the giant orange, and ate out of it. In other words, Twilight sucked Pinkie's blood, and ate her flesh.

Applejack died next. Even though she's the strongest of the Mane 6, she lacked any way to stop magical attacks, and was thus murdered by Rarity in the end.

Rainbow Dash died next. Although she had incredible speed, she lacked any type of strategy, relying too much on brawn over brain.

This left Twilight, and Rarity- the two unicorns. Although Rarity had great cunning, managing to manipulate a few of her foes, not to mention incredible at defending herself, she lacked the variety of powers Twilight had at her disposal. And this ultimately led to Rarity's downfall.

Rarity's magic just didn't have as big of a "sparkle" as Twilight's.

The winner is Twilight Sparkle.

Next time on Equestrian Death Battle!

"Three Powerful Rulers of Kingdoms"

Battle 2: Princess: Battle Royale

NOTE: THE FOLLOWING IS AN INSPIRATION OF RLYOSHI'S WORK. THE MAIN IDEA COMES FROM RLYOSHI

They are the three rulers of kingdoms. Princess Celestia, ruler of Equestria and bringer of the sun.

Princess Luna, co-ruler of Equestria and bringer of the moon.

And Princess Cadence, the crystal princess.

He's Milky WIngs and I'm Static Horn.

And it's out job to analyze their weapons, armour and skills to find out who would win a death battle.

Princess Celestia

Pony Type: Alicorn

Special Talent: Raising the Sun

Occupations: Sun Bringer, Equestrian Ruler

Often strays away from fights

Handles the paperwork amongst the two sisters

Is Twilight Sparkle's mentor

Princess Celestia is the upper ruler of Equestria over her sister Luna. She has overcome obstacles in the past.

Like when the spirit of chaos and disharmony Discord came making Celestia and Luna try to stop him, using the elements of harmony.

And when Luna turned evil making Celestia have to use the elements of harmony again. Celestia's power has been shown to be immensely huge in the past, as was Luna's. Both were able to harness the elements of harmony before any of the bringers were even born.

Celestia also had some amount of courage in the past. Having the courage to defeat her sister and send her inside the moon.

With her sister gone, the princess managed to be able to handle her country all by herself.

And then when Luna came back, what happened? She became lazy.

After her sister came back, Celestia never did anything to help and still doesn't. The closest she's ever done after Luna came back was face off against Queen Chrysalis. But lost, due to Chrysalis gaining alot of love power.

How did Celestia become a ruler? Was it a competition for whichever pony would troll 5 others and whoever would win would become ruler?

Speaking of that - yes. Princess Celestia may be high and mighty, but that doesn't stop her from being the occasional jokester. Even at welcome gatherings of her, she has managed to troll ponies who have been too nice to her.

She also held a gathering like that just to trick a shy pony into stealing a sick bird that would eventually become a badass.

This may explain why Celestia doesn't always jump into action at the very beginning. The only reason she went against Chrysalis was because Chrysalis had gained full control of Equestria. WIth someone like Discord, who was focused on Ponyville before Equestria and King Sombra who focused on The Crystal Empire, Celestia most likely didn't jump in because it wasn't fully serious to her.

We're focusing way too much on her flaws when the ruler of all of Equestria most likely has a lot of powers. Well Milky Wings go ahead and tell them the powers of a mixture of a unicorn and pegasus.

She doesn't have many powers.

What?!

Celestia can raise the sun at any given time. She can also use a giant magic ray more powerful than Twilight Sparkle's and fly high. That's about it.

Tell me why again?!

Well, Celestia and Luna did focus alot of their power on the elements of harmony. Considering they're no longer connected to the power of them since the true bringers have been discovered, Princess Celestia can't exactly access the elements, even with her huge amount of possible power.

I guess all of her power is troll power.

"Good morning Twilight, love the new hairstyle, well, happy Tuesday!"

Princess Luna

Pony Type: Alicorn

Special Talent: Raising The Moon

Occupations: Moon Bringer, Dream Enterer

Always wants to be part of something

Can enter dreams

Anti social and insecure

Old fashioned

Still youthful

Princess Luna is the younger of the two Equine sisters. With Celestia's assistance, she managed to defeat Discord. After that though, she was corrupted by envy and sent inside the moon for 1000 years after becoming evil.

When she came back, she always wanted to be part of the action... and Celestia never gave it to her.

As such, Luna hides alot of potential she has. Similiar to Celestia, she's an occasional prankster but ironically, despite being the younger of the sisters, Luna is less of a jokester. She appears to be the opposite of Celestia, her being more prone to action likely coming from her inability to get along with others.

Between the two sisters, Luna has darker powers. Such as how she can raise the moon.

And the fact that she's able to summon spiders.

Her Royal Canterlot voice can shockwave opponents and scare them.

As for other night powers, she can ride on thunderclouds and spark others with it. Her most powerful power though apart from the moon, is the ability to enter one's dreams.

When an opponent is asleep, Luna can enter the dream and do anything. Like be freaking headless!

Similiar to the Celestia in the past, Luna is brave and is probably braver than Celestia. As mentioned earlier, she always wants to get into the action, but normally fails. When Celestia tells her not to go into action, Luna never argues back, making her a slight pushover.

No wonder Fluttershy's advice on friends was the advice that made Luna bear hug and strangle Fluttershy.

Luna also doesn't realise her full potential. Being younger and spending alot of her life evil and in the moon, she hasn't realised any true power she has in her. It's also strange that Luna wants more leadership and would easily fit the leader role better than Celestia.

Seriously Luna, stop playing video games and you might discover power.

"Ha ha! The fun has been doubled!"

Princess Cadence

Pony Type: Alicorn

Special Talent: Creating Love

Occupations: Protector of The Crystal Empire, Spreader of love and light

Can hold ponies close to her height on her back

Can use love as help and an attack

Wife of Shining Armour

Princess Cadence was, when she was younger, Twilight's foal sitter. SInce then, she fell in love with Twilight's brother Shining Armor and married him.

Considering she has only appeared in four episodes so far, there's not much to work on here.

At some point, she was attacked by Queen Chrysalis and trapped inside what seemed to be remains of destroyed parts of The Crystal Empire. Cadence was trapped here until found by Twilight Sparkle. With this, she finally shown her true power. She can carry ponies the same height and weight as her on her back, along with able to use her most powerful power, love.

Too bad that just makes ponies fall in love.

But where that's an asset, it's also an attack. When the power of her love is mixed with Shining Armor's, it can destroy others with immense power. If this were a double battle Cadence and Shining had with somepony else, they'd probably win. But considering that power needs two ponies, we can't count it.

Too bad since it can annhiliate anybody!

Cadence, being younger than Celestia and Luna, still has power to the artificial object, The Crystal Heart. However, it is unknown whether this affects others besides King Sombra or not.

With her youth, similiar to Luna, she hasn't realised her full power yet.

Except with Luna, she has alot of power nonetheless. Nevertheless, Cadence, despite her youth, has still shown signs of being stern, however, there's still her biggest battle flaw to keep in mind - if Cadence loses her power of love, she loses all of her power unless she sees something like The Crystal Heart.

""One of these days, we need to get together when the fate of Equestria isn't hanging in the balance."

Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all!

It's time for an EQUESTRIAN DEATH BATTLE!!!

A mountain was seen with clouds above it. Princess Celestia flied in, looking normal and smirking to herself.

Luna flew in, looking the angriest and staring at Celestia with disbelief and frustration.

Cadence flew the most fast in, ready to fight and was determined

FIGHT!

Cadence attacked straight away, charging into Celestia and Luna. She managed to hit Celestia but Luna flew up and dodged. She flew high and rushed down, crashing into Cadence. Cadence was pinned down. Luna was about to finish her off but Cadence used her swiftness to kick away Luna.

Celestia got back up from the attack and pushed Luna back, punching her along the way. Cadence charged into both of them, flying up and down, back and forth. Celestia and Luna's hooves collided, holding onto eachother, trying to pin the other down.

Meanwhile, Cadence was still flying into them. Celestia got annoyed and fired Luna away with a low magic ray. Celestia fired a giant magic ray at Cadence. Cadence dodged it and tried crashing into Celestia. With the sun already up, Celestia brought it down to burn Cadence. The sun crushed Cadence and heated her to death.

Celestia looked over at Luna. Luna raised her hoof with a smirkon her face. Both charged into eachother. Celestia went as fast as she could but Luna flew up onto a thundercloud. She rode on it down onto Celestia. Thunder was crashing down. Celestia leaped over to dodge the blasts.

Luna decided to ride the thundercloud into Celestia. The cloud hit her. Celestia became frustrated and shot a ray at the cloud destroying it. Luna fell and looked up at Celestia walking over to her. Celestia brought the sun up from the murdered Cadence and tried crashing it down on Luna. Luna saw this and flew off.

Celestia grew into a seething rage and galloped over to Luna. Celestia grabbed her tail and shot a ray at it. Luna was severely damaged. Celestia punched Luna over and over again until it looked like she was dead.

Celestia smiled and flew off. Luna slowly got up. "Hey Celestia", she sighed. Celestia looked over angrily. "I'm not finished with you", she laughed.

The two charged. Luna got on a cloud and rode on it. She tried crashing it into Celestia. Celestia shot a ray to get rid of it. Luna jumped off and tried to summon spiders. The spiders crawled onto Celestia. The princess was surrounded.

Luna looked down and hit Celestia down with her hoof. She held onto Celestia. The princess became angrier and kicked Luna away.

She raised her sun over the murdered Cadence and tried crushing it on Luna again. Luna grabbed a cloud and flew off on it to dodge. Luna summoned the moon.

Both readied their magic. The sun and moon crashed against eachother, both princesses not giving up. Celestia continued on and so did Luna. Suddenly, Luna started to lose grip... She tried and tried again but started to lose herself. Her horn gave off power as Celestia crashed her down with the sun. Luna was dead. Celestia smiled and flew off as glimmering sparkles were over the dead princess of the night.

K.O.

Well that, was amazing, and unexpected.

This battle was something no one thought would occur.

Well first out was Cadence.

As we've seen before, Cadence hasn't reached full accomplishment without Shining Armor. And considering outside help isn't allowed, Cadence was bound to lose.

She caused some amount of damage with her speed but in the end, she didn't have the experience of Celestia or Luna.

With her gone, it was a 1on1 between Celestia and Luna.

Both gained advantages but Celestia won.

Allow us to explain. In the real world, Celestia has the upper hand since she is more skilled at it, gaining her an advantage. With Luna spending most of her time in the moon, and Celestia being older and wiser, Luna didn't have Celestia's magic experience. It came down to experience when the sun and moon crashed. Whoever held on longer meant they had more experience. Celestia learnt the moon spell herself and was able to overpower Luna

Luna might've gained some advantage in the dream world but that would be if the battle was at night. Even if they fought in the dream world, Celestia would fight back there despite Luna's advantage. Celestia has force, she will overcome obstacles despite carelessness. But her careleness comes from organising not from her fighting skills.

Luna put up a good fight.

And she put fear into Celestia a little.

However, fear did not make Celestia stop. Having more natural experience than Luna being older, Celestia had an advantage at one point. But again, Luna's dream ability is a spell Celestia never learnt. Like it or not, even if Luna is more likeable and has stranger abilities, Celestia is an all-around good fighter at any measure. giving her the upper hand.

Sorry but Trollestia's trolled everyone's favourite princess.

The winner is Princess Celestia.

Next time on death battle!

"Two masters of rhyming"

Battle 3: Big Macintosh vs Shining Armour

NOTE: THE FOLLOWING IS AN INSPIRATION OF RLYOSHI'S WORK. THE MAIN IDEA COMES FROM RLYOSHI

They're the two brothers of main characters with amazing power. Shining Armour, Twilight Sparkle's brother and captain of Royal guards.

And Big Macintosh, brother of Applejack and Apple Bloom. He has the power force behind the hard work of his hometown.

I'm Milky Wings and he's Static Horn, and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle.

Shining Armour

Pony Type: Unicorn

Special Talent: Knight

Occupation: Royal Guard Leader

Twilight Sparkle's BBBFF

Gullible

Shining Armour is Twilight Sparkle's brother. Due to her anti-social behaviour, he was her only friend and had a soft spot for her. As she went further into magic and left to go to Ponyville, Shining Armour actually joined the Royal guards, growing up to be their new captain.

His wife is Princess Cadence and just like Twilight, he has a soft spot for her. His most powerful weapon, just like hers, requires the others help. Considering Cadence was crushed by the sun, I don't think she can help him.

His most powerful spell was the power of love. Although now, Shining Armour can't use it. Even if Princess Cadence was alive, no outside help is allowed.

Considering he's a royal guard, he uses a spear like other royal guards. With this, he is still not without problems.

Firstly, most of Shining Armour's power comes from his horn. When that power goes away, Shining Armour can be pretty defective.

He has a protective spell to put up forcefields. He can also levitate objects and ponies. Remember that time he took off those Star Wars goggles? Levitation.

He can also, like Twilight, shoot a magic ray, but like Twilight's, this merely stuns the opponent.

Another flaw with him is that well, even with his skills, he's not very useful.

Due to his power coming from the source of his horn, he normally needs help as he gets caught a lot. Shining Armour is gullible and can fall for a situation.

Nevertheless, he is still powerful. With Twilight not in this fight though, who knows how he'll save himself.

"You've gotta stop saving my rump like this. It's starting to get embarrassing."

Big Macintosh

Pony Type: Earth Pony

Special Talent: Farmer

Occupation: Heavy Jobs for Apple Family

Brother of Applejack and Apple Bloom

Silent

Skilled with kicks

Big Macintosh is a member of the Apple Family and the one responsible for heavy jobs.

He prefers to not talk much, his quiet nature coming from shyness. But even with a small amount of shyness when talking, this doesn't stop him from being a badass.

Big Macintosh has been trained to be able to carry the heaviest things in Ponyville, including houses.

He's able to carry houses across all of town. Not to mention giant cakes, train doors, able to kick every apple tree without exhaustion and able to carry barrels.

And out of all the family, Big Mac is probably the most intelligent, knowing how to do a task without others help. With all of his training, he has a lot of power and many like his character for this.

Even though he barely speaks full sentences. Seriously? Why won't you talk more.

"You're my shmoopy-doopy sweedy-weedy pony pie."

Ah! Take it away.

"You're my cuddly-wuddly boopsie-woopsie pumpkin pie."

Big Mac, stop!

"You huggy-wuggy snuggy bunny!"

Please? Take it away!

It's fun seeing your reactions.

"Eeyup".

Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all.

It's time for an Equestrian Death Battle!

The red horse Big Macintosh stood in an apple orchard, waiting for his opponent.

He heard a breeze. He noticed Shining Armour galloping in, getting his hoof ready for a charge.

FIGHT!

Shining Armour charged into Big Mac. Big Mac bucked him away. Shining Armour caught himself before he hit the ground. He fired a ray at Big Macintosh. Big Mac tried to dodge but was too slow and got fired.

He stood there stunned, as his eyes derped in circles. Shining Armour picked him up and punched him over and over again as he threw him on the ground. Shining Armour was about to stab Big Mac and finish him off with a spear but Big Mac kicked him away. Big Mac galloped quick towards Shining. Shining protected himself with a force field. Big Mac started fighting off the force field by kicking it. The power of the force field was being fended off. Shining turned it off and kicked Big Mac away.

Big Mac, looking as annoyed as ever, kicked a nearby apple tree and made apples fall. He kicked them at Shining and blinded him.

Shining couldn't see. Big Mac kicked him into an apple tree. Shining's head started to hurt from this attack. Shining continued to fight and fired a ray. Big Mac, far enough away, dodged it. Shining made many rays. Big Mac jumped and dodged them.

Shining Armour galloped towards Big Mac. Big Mac did the same. Shining Armour smirked and tried levitating Big Mac. Big Mac was heavy and still moving so easily fought off the spell. He kicked Shining away.

Big Mac smacked Shining Armour. Shining Armour, seeing that Big Mac was now standing still, levitated him. Shining Armour hit him against a tree.

Shining Armour was sick of repeating what he was doing last time and charged again, this time, being serious about it. Big Mac did the same. Both galloped into each other. A cloud of smoke appeared. There was nopony dead yet.

Big Mac and Shining Armour collided their hooves. Big Mac was gaining the advantage but Shining Armour was above Big Mac, trying to push him to the ground. Big Mac let go by moving a few inches out of the knight's grasp as Shining fell to the ground, holding onto nothing. Shining tried a magic ray while on the ground but Big Mac stomped on him with his hoof before he had the chance.

Big Mac gave a devilish grin and deposited one hoof on Shining Armor.. He lifted his two hind hooves and kicked Shining Armour into the air. Shining dropped from the air. He tried a force field but due to him not standing still, he couldn't do so. Falling, he was not focused enough. He collapsed to the ground. A dead Shining Armour fell to the floor as Big Mac kicked a tree, picked up an apple and ate it while sitting on a dead Shining Armour.

K.O.

I think it’s safe to say that no one was expecting that. And everyone probably has questions to ask.

Allow us to explain. Firstly, you may be wondering about when Big Mac charged into Shining Armour, how when Shining tried his spell, it didn't work. This spell depends on a pony's weight, and normally, it works better on a pony not moving. Big Mac with strong weight and who was moving, was able to escape from the attack easily. Besides, Shining Armour doesn't have as much magic focus and skill as his sister.

Then there was his force field. Okay. When a pony is falling, it would be hard to make a force field, especially when that requires a lot of focus like any other spell. Similar to the levitation spell, the pony using it was not standing still and was falling. Magic takes studying and when you're falling from the air and don't have much magic experience, it's pretty hard to use.

Shining Armour may have had the potential to win but Big Mac beat him. Shining Armour could've won with his spear but Big Mac's kicks overpowered him. And remember, this is the same pony who's kicks are stronger than Applejack's.

Damn...

Big Mac has trained in skills for combat since he was a filly, just like, Applejack. Shining Armour spent his childhood being a good brother to Twilight. He didn't learn to be a royal guard until later on in his life, from what we've seen so far.

Well, it looks like the Sparkles just aren't as big motherbuckers as the... Macintoshes? Smiths? Jacks? Blooms? Uh, the Apple family.

The winner is Big Macintosh.

Next time on Death Battle!

"A group looking to fight eachother out of curiosity".

Battle 4: Cutie Mark Crusaders: Battle Royale

Apart from the Mane 6, there’s another smaller group in Ponyville, the CMC.

They are four fillies trying to discover their special talent but just about never succeed.

Apple Bloom, the young southern filly.

Sweetie Belle, the singing expert.

NOTE: THE FOLLOWING IS AN INSPIRATION OF RLYOSHI'S WORK. THE MAIN IDEA COMES FROM RLYOSHI

Scootaloo, the scooter speeding demon.

And finally Babs Seed, the newest member.

It’s no surprise that these four are fighting. When we asked them why they were asking us to make them fight to the death, they responded that they're trying to get cutie marks in fighting to the death. This won't end well.

I’m Static Horn and he’s Milky Wings.

And it’s our job to analyze their weapons, armour and skills to find out who would win a death battle.

Apple Bloom

Pony Type: Earth Pony

Special Talent: Building, which she’s unaware of

Occupations: Farmer, Cutie Mark Crusader

Sister of Applejack and Big Macintosh

Granddaughter of Granny Smith

Able to kick trees and make apples fall without stress despite her age

Can talk fast and loud

Just like her brother and sister, Apple Bloom has been trained in kicks, packing a powerful punch for someone of her age.

Like many earth ponies, she doesn’t have too many powers. She is incredibly resourceful though, mostly coming from her sister.

She carries out the leadership of the crusaders, being the most used to thinking of some sort of solution to a problem.

Like Applejack though, she suffers from stubbornness. Ponies have told the crusaders time and time again to just wait until they discover their talent. Apple Bloom, being the leader, normally tells them to just do something else and not listen to anyone. Applejack has overcome pride to her utmost authority but Apple Bloom has unfortunately, still not. Gee, kids not listening to reasoning. These characters are realistic.

But despite her flaws, she is the quickest on her feet of the crusaders. Scootaloo may be able to ride on a scooter fast but Apple Bloom can run the quickest. She can recover from something easy and has incredible endurance. Due to her young age, this comes from her being hyperactive. Out of all the crusaders, Apple Bloom wants a cutie mark the most and is the most desperate for it, which is what makes her the quickest.

However, being focused on quickness and farmer duties, she doesn’t focus on her intelligence. She doesn’t have as much intelligence as Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo or Babs Seed. Sweetie Belle simply goes by Apple Bloom’s decisions but has shown to not agree with them. Scootaloo has been wise enough to be able to think while on her scooter on how to do stunts and Babs Seed doesn’t think about her talent too much like the others.

But like we mentioned, Apple Bloom is the most stubborn and determined. This couples with her unwise nature.

You may have a Rainbow Dash fangirl, a filly who’s only good at singing when she sings in private, and someone who became a bully even though that was the obvious wrong path.

They would be above average intelligence, compared to Apple Bloom.

"But I don't want one eventually! I want one right now!"

Sweetie Belle

Pony Type: Unicorn

Special Talent: Singing, which she’s unaware of

Occupation: Cutie Mark Crusader member

Sister of Rarity

Voice breaks every so often

Works to please her sister but normally fails

Most cunning of the crusaders

Sweetie Belle is a more... clever crusader. She’s not too much like her sister.

However, there’s one attribute she has in common with her sister – both don’t like dangerous things. Now for Rarity, she’s faced off against danger with big enemies since she’s one of the elements. Sweetie Belle on the other hoof, is not. She actually has been shown to hate danger more than Rarity. Whenever the crusaders do something dangerous, she’s always the most scared of all.

And living with Rarity, she doesn’t even have any fighting skills. The worst danger she brings is loud singing. She sings great when she’s on her own, but when she has stage fright, doing it in crowds makes her a bad singer.

Sweetie Belle also suffers from laziness. She can’t sit still for a few seconds. With Apple Bloom doing apple business and not getting bored, wanting to do something different for once, Scootaloo having a prone objective of only paying attention to Rainbow Dash, never getting bored of that, and Babs Seed, living in Manehatten, normally sits for hours with her family doing nothing and has most likely been forced to be silent.

Sweetie Belle on the other hoof, has become lazy because she lives in an area not comfortable for most children. And due to her having stage fright, she’s the most shy.

She may not have too good physical strength, but she can run at a decent speed as shown when she competed in the sisterhooves social, so she at least has charisma.

But remember, all of the crusaders have a sense of charisma anyway so no big accomplishment. As we’ve seen recently though, her reflexes are quite strong, being able to do more than one task, that Rarity gives her, very quickly. So it can best be said that she can dodge attacks the best so that’s one upside.

But back to downsides, she’s not good with magic. Being a filly, she hasn’t really learnt much magic. She once did say though about an event that she was so excited, she could magic burst, so maybe it’s from being excited that makes her use a magic burst. Besides that, there’s nothing that can be said about her magic. She may be ditzy but she’s more of a Fluttershy, rather than a Rarity or Derpy.

I really like her mane!

Scootaloo

Pony Type: Pegasus

Special Talent: Acrobatics, which she’s unaware of

Occupation: Cutie Mark Crusader

Owns a scooter she uses for action

No 1 fangirl of Rainbow Dash

Hates everything sappy

Hides her true personality

Crippled in flying

Just as arrogant and prideful as Rainbow Dash

Scootaloo is most known for being a fan of Rainbow Dash, even dedicating herself to having a fan club for her.

And in many ways, she’s just like her. You know, cocky, egotistical, brash, narcissistic, and non-sappy.

Everything Static says is true. Scootaloo suffers from the same flaws Rainbow Dash does. However, there’s a chance that she simply wants to act like Rainbow.

Another flaw is that Scootaloo is not too good of a flier. She’s like a Young Fluttershy with Rainbow Dash’s personality. She can glide for a few seconds with her wings luckily, making a buzzing sound but that’s the best she can fly.

The best way she uses her wings is to operate her scooter. With her scooter, Scootaloo performs near impossible stunts, at least for a filly anyways. It’s not just her scooter that she’s good at with stunts though.

You see, although her scooter is what she’s most inclined to do stunts on, she can still do stunts without it. She can dance very well and is acrobatic, despite her limited wing capabilities. One time I recall, she was so powerful with kicks that she managed to kick a bowling ball to make it go around the room. So I guess it’s safe to assume that Scootaloo’s kicks are the same strength as a Filly Big Macintosh.

But like anyone, she has flaws in her personality too. Scootaloo is very aggressive, and not the biggest thinker. She is the most argumentative out of all of the crusaders, clearly shown by how she has no limits to danger. Just like Rainbow Dash, Scootaloo never wants to take things easy or soft. She goes hard on everyone and loves the most dangerous things. Whereas Rainbow Dash has managed to control herself a little better as she got older, Scootaloo still seems like she loves danger alot.

And people call her a chicken. Worst.Joke.Ever.

“No matter what we try, we always end up without our cutie marks. And, surprisingly enough, covered in tree sap."

Babs Seed

Pony Type: Earth Pony

Special Talent: Unknown

Occupation: Cutie Mark Crusader Member

Once former bully

Has a thick Boston/New York accent

Apple Bloom’s cousin

Babs Seed is the newest member of the cutie mark crusaders.

With that in mind, she is the most limited when it comes to skills.

Like any earth pony, Babs Seed can kick well. There you go. That’s every good thing Babs can do.

Not so fast, Static. Babs has other skills apart from her kicks, even if there’s very few of them. For starters, Babs Seed is the CMC member that has basically lived in fighting. Allow me to explain. As mentioned before, Babs Seed was bullied in Manehatten. When she came to Ponyville, she had the bullying thing pinned down. Therefore, it’s safe to assume Babs knows a thing or two about fighting. Her throw of weapons are very accurate. When in combat, she has the best reflexes. She attacks quickly, and is a quick thinker.

Really? She’s that powerful? Well let me tell you her problems. First thing is that while Babs may have become powerful because she likely learnt it so much from other bullies, remember that bullying is something she has grown used to. So Babs may actually take a while to think. Not with reflexes, but battle behaviour. Second and lastly, there’s Babs’ hair. If she moves so fast, that will go down and blind her, making her have to spend a few seconds to blow it.

Wow. Constructive arguement. I'm surprised by you.

Hey!

Alright the combatants are set. Let’s end this debate once and for all

It’s time for an EQUESTRIAN DEATH BATTE!!!

There was a breeze whistling through Sweet Apple Acres. Big Macintosh was kicking apples from a tree. The orange pegasus Scootaloo drove in swiftly, right beside the apple tree. Next in was Sweetie Belle, who galloped in with a smile on her face. Babs walked in thirdly, with a glare at the others. They waited on Apple Bloom. Big Macintosh was nearly finished filling his apple bucket. He bucked the tree again and Apple Bloom popped out, doing a somersault into the apples, with a few falling out. She had a determined look on her face until she saw her brother with a stern look on his face. Apple Bloom helped him put the apples back in. He put the bucket on his back as he walked off, slightly frustrated. Apple Bloom blushed at the others, embarrassed.

FIGHT!

Scootaloo immediately drove her scooter forcefully into Apple Bloom, who was right beside her, slamming her against the nearby tree. Apple Bloom climbed up the tree.

Babs ran after Sweetie Belle. Sweetie Belle ran away with Babs having trouble catching up with her. Sweetie Belle became frightened of her danger and decided to sing a happy song she knew, “99 Buckets of Oats on the Wall.” The loudness of her singing accidentally pushed Babs back, landing her head first on the ground.

Meanwhile, Scootaloo was trying to fly up to Apple Bloom who couldn’t reach her. Scootaloo decided to reverse back and drive into the tree with hard pressure, to make Apple Bloom fall. The plan succeeded but when Apple Bloom fell out, she landed on Scootaloo. Both were on the ground.

They both slowly got up. Scootaloo tried to kick Apple Bloom as Apple Bloom did the same. The kicks were even in power and both were equally injured.

Scootaloo hopped back on her scooter and drove after Apple Bloom. Apple Bloom galloped away in fear. The scooter went after her.

Sweetie Belle continued singing, getting in the spirit of it, Babs ears getting hurt by the loudness. Babs tried to fight away Sweetie Belle’s shockwave singing but her ears were starting to bleed.

Babs grew frustrated as she saw her ears bleed. Babs stepped back and ran around the loud shock waved area. Sweetie Belle was too distracted on singing to pay attention. Babs charged into Sweetie Belle from a different angle and knocked her down.

Sweetie Belle looked fearful. Babs punched her over and over again.

Sweetie Belle wanted to do something productive to stop this. She tried singing again but because Babs was punching her as she did so, she couldn’t concentrate too well.

Sweetie Belle saw one of Babs bleeding ears. Sweetie Belle tried punching it. Babs started to bleed again. She fought back the slightly more intense ear injury and picked up Sweetie Belle.

Babs wanted to get this done as much as possible. She punched Sweetie Belle solid in the face. Babs continued her onslaught and Sweetie Belle was dead.

Apple Bloom had once again climbed up another tree. Scootaloo was sick and tired of this riutine and decided to reverse and launch herself in the air with her scooter. The scooter landed inside the tree, bonking Apple Bloom on the head. Scootaloo punched Apple Bloom as she had caught her.

Babs ran over and kicked the tree as she saw both fall out. Scootaloo hopped on her scooter again and crashed into Babs and Apple Bloom. The two were on the front of her scooter.

Babs and Apple Bloom traded blows on one another while on the front of the scooter. Apple Bloom turned around to kick Babs. Babs fortunately dodged, grabbed hold of Apple Bloom’s hooves and bit on them. The scooter was leaving Sweet Apple Acres.

In town, Scootaloo finally brought her scooter to a halt. Babs took the most of the situation and immediately jumped out before Scootaloo. Babs tried kicking the scooter and knocked it away a few feet. Scootaloo used the brakes to stop any potential danger and sped her scooter towards Babs.

Apple Bloom was still on the front and was slightly frightened. Apple Bloom risked it and jumped out, landing on Babs. Scootaloo knocked her scooter against the two fillies, knocking them back again. Scootaloo got off her scooter and galloped towards them.

Apple Bloom tried to kick Babs as Babs tried doing the same. Apple Bloom overpowered Babs and kicked her away. Apple Bloom saw Scootaloo approach and dodged her. Apple Bloom galloped towards Scootaloo’s scooter to ride it. Scootaloo saw Babs Seed at a corner but saw her scooter at another. Scootaloo eventually picked fighting Babs instead.

She jumped high and landed a kick on Babs, launching her in the air. Scootaloo jumped her highest and continued to punch Babs up until she no longer could. Babs fell from the sky and landed dead, covered in blood.

Scootaloo saw Apple Bloom riding on her scooter. Apple Bloom built up speed on it but Scootaloo glided with her wings to dodge as she watched Apple Bloom crash. Apple Bloom didn’t know how to brake.

Apple Bloom spun in a dizzy trance after the crash but eventually snapped herself out of it. Apple Bloom galloped towards Scootaloo and Scootaloo did the same. As she got closer, Apple Bloom turned around to try to kick Scootaloo. Scootaloo quickly dodged her by gliding slowly above her. Scootaloo dropped down fast and crushed Apple Bloom. Apple Bloom treated this like a bull fight and lifted her back up to throw Scootaloo in the air.

As Scootaloo was falling, Apple Bloom galloped over and bucked her. Scootaloo zipped high in the air. She was falling high from the air like Babs was. As she got lower and lower, Scootaloo flapped her wings to make her fall less painful. It worked to her advantage.

Apple Bloom, a few feet away, galloped towards her. Scootaloo ran as fast as she could and got her scooter and helmet ready. She sped on her scooter with intense force. Apple Bloom turned around and got her kicks ready. Scootaloo saw her do this and made her scooter fly in the air, using a nearby houses roof. She flew her scooter over Apple Bloom, reversed it and ran over Apple Bloom.

Apple Boom became angry. She galloped into the scooter. Scootaloo tried to dodge her but unfortunately for Scootaloo, Apple Bloom did a karate kick to prevent this, demoloshing the scooter. Scootaloo lost her scooter and was on the ground helpless. Apple Bloom walked over to her. Scootaloo was helpless without her scooter, but then she remembered what Rainbow Dash would do.

Scootaloo kicked Apple Bloom away before she had the chance to finish her off. Scootaloo charged into the grounded Apple Bloom. Apple Bloom tried a karate stunt but Scootaloo did a stunt of a somersault in the air to dodge Apple Bloom. Apple Bloom immediately kicked Scootaloo when she was beside her but Scootaloo suspected this by now and kicked Apple Bloom back and knocked her down.

Scootaloo grabbed one of the wheels that fell off her scooter and crushed Apple Bloom with it many times until she was dead.

K.O.

These are children looking for their special talent. Why did we accept their offer of challenging each other to a fight to the death?

This was clearly an intense fight, especially considering these are fillies. Let’s go down the lines. First out was not surprisingly, Sweetie Belle.

Oh, poor Sweetie Belle. Sure she did some damage. She bled Babs’ ears with her singing. But what ultimately killed her was the fact that unlike the other three, she never lived in an environment combat took place in. Babs easily just ran away from her singing area and attacked her at the angle that wasn’t being affected. Sweetie Belle didn’t want to not do anything so then did some damage to Babs’ ears. But because Sweetie Belle doesn’t have the best kicks, it didn’t do enough damage, making her lose to Babs Seed. Next out was Babs Seed herself.

Scootaloo, after crashing into the two other fighters, halted. Apple Bloom and Babs fought each other. The reason Apple Bloom has such an advantage was because Babs is from Manehatten. She was secretly bullied there, but that place is fancier. Babs didn’t get the full combat experience like Apple Bloom and was extremely injured.

Now because Scootaloo was driving her scooter, Apple Bloom was able to dodge because she got so much into the fighting spirit and wanting to get her cutie mark. Babs Seed wasn’t able to because she was highly damaged. With her weakened by Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom, Scootaloo did the finishing blow by making Babs fall from the sky, killing her.

In the end, it was between Apple Bloom and Scootaloo. Apple Bloom may have gained an advantage to some extent but it was ultimately Scootaloo winning because of her acrobatics. Apple Bloom is an earth pony and didn’t manage to be as quick on her feet as Scootaloo.

Scootaloo is a fangirl of Rainbow Dash. What do fangirls do? They try their best to be just like their idol. And that’s what Scootaloo did. Apple Bloom did destroy Scootaloo’s scooter but what needs to be reminded is that Scootaloo’s acrobatic skill doesn’t come from her scooter, it comes from her herself, she just spread it onto her scooter.

In the end, both can be classified as well... dumb. But when both quick-thinking is put in perspective, it needs to be worked out which kind of thinking is best for battle, Scootaloo’s. Scootaloo may do dangerous things but that just goes to show that she’s braver than the other crusaders. We also need to look at the special talents. Okay, Babs isn’t yet confirmed but as for the others, Sweetie Belle’s is singing (which is only slightly useful), Apple Bloom’s is construction, and Scootaloo’s is acrobatics. And because construction is only good in technical situations, it just can’t match to the speed Scootaloo manages to have, despite her wing disadvantage.

Sorry crusaders, but you need to scoot over and let Scootaloo take the spotlight.

The winner is Scootaloo.

Next time on Equestrian Death Battle!

“Two assertive fighters that can be classified as the opposite of “shy”.

Battle 5: Gilda The Griffon vs Iron Will

NOTE: THE FOLLOWING IS AN INSPIRATION OF RLYOSHI'S WORK. THE MAIN IDEA COMES FROM RLYOSHI

When it comes to assertive characters, there’s surprisingly quite a few of them in Equestria.

Like Iron Will, the master of assertiveness techniques.

And Gilda, the rage filled griffon.

It’s no surprise that these two are fighting. They are incredibly angry, and their actually the first non-pony characters we’re pitting against each other.

I’m Milky Wings and he’s Static Horn, and it’s our job to analyze their weapons, armour and skills to find out who would win a death battle

Iron Will

Creature Type: Minotaur

Occupation: Assertiveness Teacher

Special Talent: Assertiveness

Is a kid show’s version of Mr. T

Assertiveness technique is to stand up for yourself

One of the most intelligent characters in the show

Iron Will is the one we’re rooting for here. Go Iron Will! Barbecue that griffon into KFC.

I take it you still haven’t gotten over Gilda since what she did to Fluttershy...

Don’t get me started on her in the show, compared to Iron Will. At least when Iron Will faced Fluttershy he actually accepted his defeat. Gilda is a basic bitch.

Calm down Static! We need to talk about Iron Will for now.

Ugh, you’re right. Let’s talk about Iron Will.

Right. Iron Will, unlike Gilda, is trained in teaching assertiveness.

His basic method is that if someone is being an asshole to you, then you be an asshole back to them, pure genius.

He’s also basically Mr. T as a minotaur, and believe it or not, he is actually pretty intelligent.

Yeah. His training actually worked on Fluttershy until she let it get to her head.

Iron Will actually occasionally relies on his goats to help him. But if we counted them, the battle would be too one sided in Iron Will’s favour.

Too bad as well.

Iron Will, following the previous assertiveness lessons we explained, is skilled in physical combat. He has trained on this his whole life. But his one major flaw his that he can be very gullible. If tried to be reasoned with, he shows his weak spot - being non-persistent

We’re not sure if he’s gullible because of his natural behaviour, or Fluttershy.

Like any minotaur though, Iron Will’s charge is deadly, because of his horns.

Another glaring flaw with Iron Will is that despite his size, he has very low weight. His goats are able to carry him with no problems whatsoever.

A final part of Iron Will’s problems is that due to him teaching assertiveness, he suffers from anger problems.

Maybe he would get along with Gilda, because of what they have in common. Or maybe they’ll just try to beat the shit out of each other insanely.

"When somepony tries to block, show them that you rock!”

Gilda

Creature Type: Griffin

Special Talent: Unknown; most likely something to do with speed and force

Occupation: Unknown

Former childhood friend of Rainbow Dash

Is half-eagle, half-lion and no awesome

Dialogue is that of a punk kid from the 90’s

Hated by Static Bolt

As I said before, bitch.

Gilda was Rainbow Dash’s past rival back when Rainbow Dash was a filly. Gilda normally hid her true colours, until that bit her in the ass.

She hides the fact that she sucks.

Gilda’s strength relies on sheer brute force. She has a short temper and when it goes, she lets loose.

She represents the negative aspects of Rainbow Dash.

Gilda’s general problem is that she’s not very mindful. She’s more brawn than brain, if anything.

Gilda’s very paranoid and can get easily jealous. She can fly a speed close to Rainbow Dash’s level herself. Her roar can make the foe tremble. She also has griffon claws to claw an opponent. Her tail can be useful to pick up objects.

Gilda always wants to be part of the action. She is very severe with her attacks and when in flight camp, she probably trained more on strength rather than speed.

Deep down though, Gilda probably does like fun, but if angered in the slightest, she will let loose, even if the opponent did nothing wrong. Making Fluttershy cry! I’m going to kill Gilda.

Calm down Static, at least Gilda got what was coming to her.

It’s not enough. I want this griffin’s head on a silver platter.

"When you decide not to be lame anymore, give me a call."

I feel the same about you, dumb bitch.

Alright the combatants are set. Let’s end this debate once and for all.

IT’S TIME FOR AN EQUESTRIAN DEATH BATTLE!!!

Iron Will stood outside his maze, ready for his opponent. The furious griffon dropped in, ready to attack.

FIGHT!

Iron Will immediately charged at his opponent with his horns. Gilda zoomed up quick and flew behind Iron Will. The griffin aerial kicked the minotaur with one of her claws and left a scar on Iron Will.

Gilda landed next to Iron Will, about to charge into him. She went to go for Iron Will’s legs. Iron Will held his fists together and tried enduring Gilda’s charge. When the time came, Iron raised one of his legs and kicked Gilda into the clouds.

Gilda quickly caught herself while in the air. Iron Will looked at his foe above him and had his arms folded, waiting for Gilda to make her move. Gilda attempted to zoom and crash into Iron Will. As she peered closer however, Iron Will slammed her on the ground, proceeding to kick her into the maze.

Iron Will got his horns ready for a charge but when he entered the maze, he noticed his foe had vanished. Iron Will peeked at two different paths in the maze and couldn’t see Gilda in either one. He attempted to go to the right to find his opponent. It turned out however, that Gilda was above him. She dashed hard into him and forced him on the ground. She was about to punch him but Iron Will kicked her away before she had the chance.

Iron Will slammed Gilda down and knocked her with his fists many times. Gilda started to bleed. She sniffed the blood on her and grew into a fit of rage.

It was unlike any other. She grew red in her already frustrated face. Her wings raised and she escaped Iron Will’s hold by pecking him so hard it was like he was being drill pecked. Iron Will’s nose started to bleed. He took a glimpse up at the outraged griffin before she dashed at the speed of Rainbow Dash into the fearful minotaur. He tried holding Gilda back but it was no use. She had him caught. Gilda forced Iron Will onto the ground and snapped his throat with her talons by strangling him. She punched his throat where it opened. Gilda decapitated Iron Will.

K.O.

No! Why? Why is Gilda still alive? It would’ve been a glorious celebration if she was dead.

There’s a perfectly good explanation as to why Gilda won. Iron Will may have abs and horns, but he easily lacked the wing advantage and speed. His defences were low and made him an easy target for Gilda to overpower. At one point, Iron Will did gain the advantage. Iron Will had good reflexes but once he had Gilda pinned down and was already weakened as well, she had lost her temper after seeing her blood appear, causing her to annihilate him. Neither of us are happy with this result but this is simple logic. Gilda is quicker than Iron Will and can fly, and while it may have been close towards the end, Gilda was the ultimate winner.

Neither of us had enough “iron will” to watch as Gilda won.

The winner is Gilda.

Next time on Equestrian Death Battle!

Gilda has managed to defeat someone as assertive as herself. But next week, she will face her biggest obstacle; ‘another former rival of Rainbow Dash’

Battle 7: Braeburn vs Soarin'

They're the two lovers of apple pie. Two stallions who are normally members of hardworking societies or groups,

But are just less serious and hardworking. First you have the Wonderbolts member Soarin'

And Braeburn, the less hardworking member of the apple family.

I'm Static Horn and he's Milky Wings.

And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armour and skills to find out who would win a death battle

Braeburn

Pony Type: Earth Pony

Occupation: Unknown

Special Talent: Unknown; likely something to do with apples

Member of the Apple Family

Is jolly and hyperactive

More playful than other members

Braeburn, unlike his other apple family members, loves fun activity more than anything else. He likes anything that seems remotely satisfying, which means that he is very easygoing, just like his cousin Big Macintosh.

But downright insane like his cousin Apple Bloom. What do you get when you have easygoing and hyperactive? A pretty cool guy.

Braeburn hails from Appleloosa. This is mostly where his hyperactive and jolly behaviour comes from. Here, he doesn't do as much buck work as say, Applejack or Big Macintosh. No, he represents the more party element of country.

Braeburn loves his town so much that he even loves screaming it whenever making the slightest mention of it. Like most Apple...uh...loosians?loosans? Hm... Citizens of Appleloosa, his main weapon is apple pie. We may have never seen him use the pies but what we do know is that he is aware of the weapon.

What else can he use? Being from Appleloosa, his weapons are more practical and joking. However, despite him having this whole hyperactive personality, he still holds some matureness. No matter how hyperactive he is, he's still pretty calm. Braeburn has never once lost his temper. He always goes with what's going on around him.

But that doesn't stop him from being a bit to jolly for an Appleloosanloosian.

"Hey there. Welcome to Appleloosa."

Soarin'

Pony Type: Pegasus

Occupation: Wonderbolt Member

Special Talent: Speed

Loves apple pie

Is jolly and hyperactive

Prefers eating apple pie on the ground rather than on a table

Soarin' is a top-class member of the Wonderbolts,

But probably not the most serious.

Soarin's favorite food is apple pie,

And whaddayknow? Braeburn's weapon is apple pies.

Soarin's upside though is that he is trained in flying and an elite member of The Wonderbolt's.

But even they get their asses kicked every so often.

Soarin' - being part of the Wonderbolts - is skilled in speed and normally takes to the air when performing a feat.

Nevertheless, he's not really that concentrated. Soarin' tends to, just like Braeburn, be more into fun rather than anything else. And just like Braeburn, we wouldn't want this stallion to be anything else than upbeat. Too bad the male characters are represented in this show as either wimpy punching bag dragons, one dimensional farmers, and the two colt equivalents to Lloyd and Harry.

"I'll take that big apple pie."

Alright the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all.

IT'S TIME FOR AN EQUESTRIAN DEATH BATTLE!

The sun was shining in the town of Appleloosa. Braeburn was hiding behind a lump of hay, waiting for his pegasus opponent.

Soarin' burst in, looking determined and noticing his opponent behind the lump of hay.

FIGHT!

Soarin' sped in fast to the lump of hay. Braeburn dodged the attack by hopping away from the hay and following this by bucking Soarin' and knocking him down.

Soarin' lay on the ground as Braeburn approached him. Braeburn slapped an apple pie on Soarin' . Soarin' was blinded. Soarin' loved the smell of the pie though and ate it, despite his injured eye vision.

Soarin' dashed back into Braeburn again. Braeburn tried to put his legs out to deflect the hit but Soarin's head overpowered the hooves by a long way as Braeburn fell straight down.

Braeburn thought to himself and noticed some apple pies. He threw five of them fast at Soarin' , but Soarin' simply used his speed to dodge every last throw. He did flips somersaults, and ate the last pie thrown at him. Soarin' once again tried crashing into Braeburn but Braeburn jumped immediately to dodge as Soarin' missed. As Soarin' slowed down to turn around, Braeburn quickly bucked him again and sent him flying. Soarin' once again collapsed to the ground.

Braeburn approached Soarin' and picked him up to punch him. Soarin' quickly opened his wings though and slapped Braeburn with one wing as he flew up. Braeburn couldn't reach Soarin' since he was in the clouds.

Soarin' flew up fast as he began to try and find an area that Braeburn couldn't see him in. Soarin' dashed at immensely powerful speed as he reached down to Braeburn. Braeburn tried to grab another apple pie and throw it but as it hit Soarin' , all it did was hit right off his face. He went so fast the pie couldn't even stay on his face. He exploded the field as smokme appeared.

Soarin' still stood as he saw a dead, decapitated Braeburn. Soarin' picked up Braeburn's hat and threw it on his head as he winked

K.O.

I'm gonna miss them.

You mean Braeburn?

That and the wasted apple pies.

Let's simply go over this battle. Soarin' managed to overpower Braeburn for many reasons. For one, Soarin' is a skilled Wonderbolt. Therefore, he has incredibly good flying ability, along with equally as great speed.

Next, Braeburn didn't have much good going for him. He may have managed to blind Soarin' with apple pie, slowing him down a little, but come on! Soarin' loves apple pie.

And with pies not working, all Braeburn had left was his kicks. As mentioned earlier, he has not gained as much experience with apple bucking as Applejack, Granny Smith, or Big Macintosh.

Soarin' may be a jokester. He may be a tad childish. But since he's a Wonderbolt, one thing's for certain; he get's the job done right.

And since he was up against a simple earth pony, it would be easy to know who would win.

Looks like Soarin' just "burnt" him

The winner is Soarin' .

Next time on Equestrian Death Battle!

"A good friend of Braeburn's seeking vengeance on Soarin'

Got a suggestion for a Equestrain Death Battle? Comment below on who you want to see next.

Battle 8: Little Strongheart vs Soarin'

Well, we’re still on the subject of apple pie,

And it looks like somebody’s trying to avenge a death. We have Little Strongheart, avenging the death of her new friend Braeburn.

She’s up against the Wonderbolt member, Soarin’ , as he faces another opponent.

It’s a good thing we’re not wasting apple pies anymore.

I’m Milky Wings and he’s Static Horn, and it’s our job to analyze their weapons, armour and skills to find out who would win an Equestrian Death Battle.

Little Strongheart

Creature Type: Buffalo

Occupation: Stampeding

Special Talent: Stampeding and Speed

Former Enemy of Apploosans/Apploosians

Worker of Chief Thunderhooves

Little Strongheart is a definite example of more than meets the eye when it comes to strength,

Even though she’s a buffalo, so it would be pretty obvious that she’s strong. Heck, her name has strong in it.

Actually Static, even if she is a buffalo, she still has flaws. She doesn’t appear to have much muscle.

Her speed on the other hand, is better than other buffaloes, even managing to outclass Rainbow Dash herself at speed. And this is where her strength lies.

This is how the little buffalo matches the others in strength. While she doesn’t have much muscle, her force is her best aspect.

To explain this, let’s briefly look at the strength of Rainbow Dash. She causes more success with hits with the speed she builds up before crashing into something. It all lies on how much force you carry. And Little Strongheart definitely has it.

This is exactly why she has managed to be close to Rainbow Dash in speed and strength.

As for her other pros, she appears to be able to use her surroundings to her advantage. Why?

Simple. Being a buffalo, she has been trained in stealing and trained to be a ruffian too.

She has a strong heart too. Even though... that’s in her name... those damn puns Equestria has. Everypony, Anypony, Las Pegasus, Canterlot, Ponyville, Equestria...

“I think they get the idea chief”

My thoughts exactly.

Soarin’

Pony Type: Pegasus

Occupation: Wonderbolts Member

Special Talent: Speed

Loves apple pie

Is jolly and hyperactive

Prefers eating apple pie on the ground rather than on a table

Soarin’ was our previous fighter against Braeburn. In that battle, Soarin’ managed to beat him using agility and speed.

And as we mentioned, he mostly relies on that since he’s a Wonderbolt. Nevertheless, as we mentioned, he’s still very much of a jokester.

He may be able to get the job done, but he’s not as into battling as a Wonderbolt like Spitfire. Soarin’ is generally a Wonderbolt with a few quirks. He seems to be a bit of a klutz, not thinking before doing something. Such an example would be him dropping an apple pie when he starts not paying attention to it.

I hate to say it again, but... Think of the pies!

Now despite this quality, Soarin’ still has some energy to spare. After all, he has the speed of a Wonderbolt.

But the intelligence of a Cutie Mark Crusader.

“You saved it, thanks”

Alright, the combatants are set. Let’s end this debate once and for all.

It’s time for an Equestrian Death Battle!

The small buffalo, Little Strongheart, stood outside Appleloosa, waiting for her pegasus opponent.

Soarin’ tore into the stage from the sky, looking as confident as ever, still wearing Braeburn’s hat. Little Strongheart glared at him.

FIGHT!

Little Strongheart ran fast into her opponent. Soarin’ responded to her assault by flying fast to the clouds.

Little Strongheart decided to reach Soarin’s level by galloping into Appleloosa. Soarin’ looked confused and tried speeding into Appleloosa too. He noticed Little Strongheart now on a roof. Soarin’ dived down to attack her but she immediately jumped down from the roof as he got closer, using her quick reflexes.

Soarin’ broke down the roof and was inside an empty room. He was injured and had neck pain from the roof. His amount of speed into the room caused a cloud of smoke to appear. He looked around, searching for the area of his opponent.

Suddenly Little Strongheart dived into him crushing Soarin’ down on the ground immediately. As he was on the ground trembling, she kicked him immediately in the face. Soarin’ answered her attack by quickly grabbing her legs and attempting to throw her at a wall and break it. As he did so though, she immediately recovered from the spin Soarin’ caused on her and slapped her hooves off the wall.

She stampeded fast into Soarin’. Soarin’ quickly flew fast up. Little Strongheart slapped her hooves off a wall again as she did another stunt on him. As Soarin’ flew away fast, he thought he was high enough to escape her clutches.

Just then, he noticed Little Strongheart was gone from where she was. Soarin’ looked around from the sky to find his opponent but couldn’t see her anywhere. Soarin’ dropped down from the ground to check through the area where she was.

He was walking past a hay bale when suddenly Little Strongheart jumped out and pounded Soarin’ down. She kicked him hard in the face. Soarin’ tried letting go but she had him pinned down.

An idea struck inside Soarin’s head though. He bit one of Little Strongheart’s hooves, making her lose part of her grip. He now had her pinned down. Soarin’ immediately kicked her in the face and pounded her down, just the same as she did with him.

Little Strongheart noticed though that Soarin’ wasn’t exactly concentrating too much on half of her hooves. She kicked him away since he didn’t have enough grip. Soarin’ tried flying off with now weakened wings, but only managed to fly a little high.

Little Strongheart somersaulted from the ground up to reach his level. She opened her mouth for a bite and managed to hold him. She swung her opponent and dropped him down. Soarin’ was nearly dead. Little Strongheart finished her weakened opponent by coming in from the sky with a basic buffalo head butt, slamming him down dead.

K.O.

The buffalo would be proud.

Soarin’ may have gained some wing advantage but he was ultimately defeated by how gullible he is, along with the fact that Little Strongheart could reach his level using her acrobatic skill.

And being a buffalo, her reflexes were incredible, being able to confuse and blind Soarin’ from his attacks. At one point, when he had her pinned down, he didn’t pay enough attention to the fact that he didn’t have enough control to trap her down. Buffaloes are always active, so it would be tough to pin Little Strongheart down because she’s so active. Why was it so easy to pin down an active pony like Soarin’? Because buffaloes are precise with their actions, especially ones like Little Strongheart. A buffalo like her would want to get things precise when attacking.

And even with Soarin’s hyperactive nature, it just wasn’t enough against an acrobatic master like Little Strongheart.

Looks like that Wonderbolt will be “soaring” no more.

The winner is Little Strongheart.

Next time on Equestrian Death Battle!

“3-on-3 Battle of One Species Versus Another”

Got a suggestion for an Equestrian Death Battle? Comment below on who you want to see soon.

Battle 9: Big Macintosh vs Snowflake

Physical Fighting is a common thing in Equestria. Be it bucking, cloud clearing, or both. We have Big Macintosh, Apple Family member and Ponyville resident applebucker.

And Snowflake, the juiced pegasus.

I'm Milky Wings and he's Static Horn. And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armour and skills to find out who would win an Equestrian Death Battle.

Big Macintosh

Pony Type: Earth Pony

Special Talent: Farmer

Occupation: Heavy Jobs for Apple Family

Brother of Applejack and Apple Bloom

Silent

Skilled with kicks

We use the same stuff in his first battle because of how one note he is

Big Macintosh is one of our former fighters, managing to defeat Shining Armour and earn victory. The first apple family member to do this too.

And for good reason; he's a fucking beast. It's like if Rainbow Dash, Spike, Discord, and Gummy were put in a blender... except instead of being dead it creates Big Mac...

As we mentioned before, Big Macintosh is incredibly strong. Heck, he's easily the most physically powerful in Ponyville. He's older than Apple Bloom and Applejack, has more energy than Granny Smith, and is the one pony who handles applebucking duties. Considering he's done this his whole life, he's pretty powerful.

And considering Applejack's work is only a quarter as powerful as his, he can lift a fucking house! I know we already mentioned this but we cannot stress this enough! Big Macintosh is a bigger badass than the ones we mentioned earlier, except, to some extent, Gummy.

While he suffers from shyness, that does not stop the determination he displays. His shyness is talking to others. The bad thing about this is is that Big Mac isn't a really big go-getter. Most of the time in his previous battle, he didn't exactly face Shining Armour head on. The only times he did was when he was in a rough situation. Which means that his lack of being a go-getter is not a fully terrible thing. In fact, it's great. Big Macintosh is surprisingly very wise and is able to handle a situation well.

They should name a burger after him.

"Nope"

Snowflake

Pony Type: Pegasus

Occupation: Wonderbolts Tryout

Special Talent: Unknown, likely something to do with flying

Tryout for the Wonderbolts

Team Player

Brave

Snowflake, at first glance is one walking joke by the show that so far has appeared in two episodes. On closer inspection, he appears to be a tragic character.

How is this even possible?

Allow me to explain. Snowflake appears to not be able to take criticism very well. Evidence shown by one simple sentence said by Spitfire to him.

"Think you're hot stuff?!"

Followed by a whimper by the pegasus. And considering he was shown originally to be a confident pegasus in the past, this must be something he's hiding. Snowflake hates to be downgraded and is only confident in presentation. In performance, not so much. Snowflake's positive though is that he appears to have a big amount of strength, just like Big Mac. However, his wings are the size of a filly. Interesting....

Enough with your ideas. Let's just move on with the battle.

"YEAHHHH!"

Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all.

It's time for an EQUESTRIAN DEATH BATTLE!

Big Macintosh waited in his apple orchard for his opponent. Snowflake zoomed in and stayed in mid-air, ready to attack.

FIGHT!

Snowflake sped from the air. Big Mac picked up one of the apples in his bucket and threw the apple at Snowflake to evade the attack. Snowflake quickly dodged it and continued to charge.

Big Mac simply stood there as Snowflake got closer. As Snowflake started to reach his level, Big Macintosh quickly trotted fast and hid behind the tree. Snowflake crashed into the tree, with a few apples falling on him, landing him to the ground.

Big Macintosh calmly walked over and bucked Snowflake away. "YEAHHHH!" yelled Snowflake, as he charged back into Big Macintosh.

Big Macintosh attempted to buck Snowflake away but Snowflake quickly dodged the kick. He attempted to confuse Big Mac by flying back and forth fast.

When Snowflake thought he had Big Macintosh confused he dashed into Big Mac's spot. Only problem was that the stallion wasn't there. He had hidden himself soemwhere. Snowflake looked around but couldn't see Big Mac. Snowflake walked around but couldn't find Big Mac.

Suddenly, Big Macintosh appeared behind a tree that was behind Snowflake. He quickly bucked Snowflake into the air, damaging him.

Snowflake recovered from the spin and quickly flew back down. Big Macintosh turned around and got his legs ready. Instead of actually charging this time though, Snowflake stopped slightly above Big Mac. He quickly flew in front of Big Mac and head butted the stallion before he had a chance to counter the attack.

Big Macintosh landed onto the ground. He tried getting up but noticed a speeding Snowflake incoming. Big Mac quickly dodged the attack and trotted off, thinking of how to counter Snowflake's wing power.

But then when the stallion galloped back, he couldn't see Snowflake anywhere.

Suddenly, Snowflake charged in fast from the air, speeding fast into Big Macintosh, the attack knocking Snowflake back a few feet in the process.

Snowflake stood proudly. But there, in that moment, he saw an incredibly injured Big Macintosh. He was still not dead. he was somehow able to endure the attack. Snowflake gave a fierce look, but felt tired after everything Big Macintosh had done to him. He charged fast into Big Mac with the Applebucker doing the same. Both collided with each other. Smoke cleared. Inside the smoke were two stallions pushing their heads against each other, trying to overcome the other's attack. Snowflake opened his mouth and bit on Big Mac's fur. Big Macintosh responded with a bite on Snowflake's forehead.

Both tried holding on for a while. After a while the smoke finally cleared. One pony stood, and it was a proud apple farmer. Snowflake lay lying on the ground, dead after his fight.

K.O.

"Eeyup".

Well... this was awesome.

Both fighters shown amazing work. In the end though, Big Mac, once again, came out on top.

In the end, both fighters were pretty equal. Snowflake, to some extent, had an advantage with him having wings and a student of the Wonderbolts. However, Big Mac had enough strength and endurance to withstand the attack. He didn't hurt himself as much as Snowflake, which is why he won when both collided. Big Mac has just as quick reflexes and more endurance, since, like we said, he's trained in this aspect.

Big Mac is calm about a lot of things but once something becomes intense, he can't stop. Big Macintosh is close to unstoppable when it comes to strength. He can withstand serious blows like the ones Snowflake did. As we mentioned, Snowflake doesn't have good defense. They are abysmal compared to Big Mac's. Also, Snowflake, most of the time, challenged Big Mac without thinking. He thought Big Mac was as big of an idiot to be tricked by him. But since Big Mac is wiser than some think, he knew what to do. Snowflake was an opponent easier to identify than others. Big Mac knew his weaknesses easily.

And in the end, we learnt that Big Macintosh can beat some of the hardest opponents, especially if their as delicate as a "snowflake."

The winner is Big Macintosh (again)

Next time on Equestrian Death Battle!

"Annoying Bitches versus Annoying Dumbasses

Battle 10: Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon vs Snips and Snails

Sometimes, there's battles where it's hard to wonder who you want to root for... and not in a good way.

A primary example is the fight occurring today.

We have Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon, the resident schoolyard bullies of Ponyville,

And Snips and Snails, the resident schoolyard idiots of Ponyville.

He's Milky Wings and I'm Static Horn,

And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win an Equestrian Death Battle.

Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon

Pony Types: Earth Ponies

Occupation: Students

Special Talents: Unknown; likely something to do with being total bitches. I can't fucking stand these two. They annoy me to the point of sheer frustration. Oh no, here comes Static Horn. Um, I'm only typing an analysis of these two while you take a bathroom break. Heh. I'm answering you through writing because it's customary. Don't give me that look. I can type as much as I want. Excuse me for hating characters. Oh, you think Gilda was annoying? At least she had a motivation for her actions, and had a decent backstory for a one-note character. What do these two have? Nothing. In fact, I'm done. I'm leaving. Do this yourself. I don't want to waste time like you did. Shut up, I am not being a hypocrite, and wasting time.

Uh... I guess I'll continue... Um... yeah. Everything Milky Wings said is true. Even maybe the part about Gilda... Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon are bullies of the Cutie Mark Crusaders. They have little to no redeemable qualities in their characters. Even when it's been proven that the crusaders are more powerful than either, these two still continue their work. However, despite how big of bullies they are. They never actually hurt anyone. They make threatening statements but that's it. The two have just about no defensive power, shown with such incidents like Babs Seed's confrontation, or if something jump scares them like a photo flash for example. But that doesn't mean they don't do the same. While the two are definite cowards, I think we can all agree that they have no trouble confronting others, especially if their as wimpy, and one-dimensional as these two. If faced by a tough opponent however, this will immediately paralyze them from battle. Diamond and Silver are quick-thinkers, yet idiotic. Terrible at fighting, but spoilt. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to get Milky Wings to stop worrying about the outcome.

Those morons better not screw this up!...

"Bump! Bump! Sugar-lump, rump!"

Snips and Snails

Pony Types: Unicorns

Occupation: Students to Miss Cheerilee

Special Talent: Unknown; with Snips, it's likely something to do with scissors. With Snails, it's likely something to do with being slow.

Eager

Always pick the newest popular thing

Always end up causing disasters

Snips and Snails are students of Miss Cheerilee,

And they are some of the most enthusiastic characters on the show. But maybe a little too much...

Snips and Snails are very accident-prone. In the majority of their appearances, something bad always seems to happen to them. They are foolish, idiotic, annoying, with a hint of loyalty.

Unlike Diamond and Silver, these two actually mean well. Snips and Snails always try to help the situation at hand, but it always leads to disaster.

Snips and Snails also represent the children always going with the newest fad. They appear to simply suck up to anyone who impresses them, no matter what it risks.

Not only do they do anything to get closer to their role models, but they will follow anything the impressive pony says.

As for magic purposes, the only spell we've ever seen used was Snails, lighting up his horn to show light. Extensive proof that they know barely any spells is when they entered a talent show. In that, they performed no spells and did magic tricks instead.

But there is one major upside to these two. Snips and Snails antics doesn't only cause trouble for them, but it causes trouble for others. What better contenders to be the Lloyd and Harry of MLP?

Snails, are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Why is it they call it a flea market when they don't really sell fleas?

Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all.

It's time for an Equestrian Death Battle!

Diamond,  Silver, Snips, and Snails stared angrily at each other in the playground. Scootaloo, Featherweight, Twist, and a few others watched from the sidelines. "Miss Cheerilee, why aren't you stopping this fight?" asked Scootaloo. Cheerilee felt dizzy and started shaking. "Hey, if I can replace your education with watching Apple Bloom throw hoops, then why not do it with this fight to the death?" she wondered as she drank some alcoholic cider.

FIGHT!

Snips and Snails pounded on their opponents and weakly hit them. Diamond and Silver grabbed the active hooves and tossed Snips and Snails in the air, as they crashed on the ground. Snips whispered in Snails ears. Snails nodded and the two galloped off. Diamond and Silver were confused, but followed in close pursuit.

"Well that didn't last long did it?" yelled Cheerilee in frustration, as she walked to her office. "Where are you going?" asked a young filly. "I need another drink", answered Cheerilee in response.

Snips and Snails galloped through town with Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon in close pursuit. Snips and Snails were too fast for their liking however. Eventually, they lost track of their opponents.

Suddenly, Snips and Snails jumped off a nearby roof onto their opponents. In response, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon flung their foes in the air. Snips and Snails crashed against a wall, as they noticed Diamond and Silver running at an extreme speed. Snips and Snails attempted using their reflexes and tried bucking them away, managing to do so. Diamond Tiara had lost her fuse now. She walked on Silver Spoon's back, as her ally bounced her forward with a push.

Diamond Tiara lunged at her opponents, while picking up her tiara. Snips and Snails screamed. It came at Snails. Snips closed his eyes and pushed Snips out of the way, as the tiara sliced Snips' throat, landing him on the ground. Snails gasped and looked at his dead buddy. Snails shed a tear and looked at Diamond Tiara with anger on his face.

The tiara was on the ground after the aerial assault Diamond Tiara caused. Snails put it in his mouth and charged for his opponents. Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon screamed. Diamond thought for a second, as she looked over at Silver Spoon. Diamond Tiara bucked Silver Spoon in front of her, as the tiara managed to slice Silver Spoon's throat too.

Snails looked around confusingly, wondering where his coward of an opponent was. Suddenly, Diamond Tiara popped in surprisingly, karate bucking Snails. Diamond Tiara picked up her tiara once more and charged at the opposition. Snails jumped up energetically. He shut his eyes tight and stretched his hooves out. Diamond Tiara charged fast at him with her tiara, with intense fury.

As she got closer, Snails began to speak. "...For Snips". He bucked Diamond Tiara back along with her tiara. The tiara started to fall and sliced all across Diamond Tiara's stomach, killing her.

K.O.

Wow. That was just as gruesome as the cutie mark crusaders fight.

Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon appeared to have some ounce of an advantage against foes as as gullible as Snips and Snails. However, it was Snips and Snails close bond that managed to let them win.

Snips was noble enough to save his friends life. Much more noble in comparison to what Diamond did to her ally. This forced Snails to lose his fuse, like any average pony. It may have been dangerous and nearly killed him, but then again, what would you expect from Lloyd and Harry?

What stopped anything bad from happening to Snails was the fact that him and his former ally have, not only do things that get themselves in trouble, but things that gets others in trouble. These two are complete idiots and use what they can to get somewhere.

Diamond and Silver, on the other hoof, have no real type of battle advantage. The two may have had some work done when Diamond Tiara's tiara was pulled out for battle, but it was the bond between Diamond and Silver that made them lose.

Diamond Tiara, as we know, is a selfish little brat. She puts herself before anyone else. And because Snips and Snails are loyal to each other, and everyone else, their teamwork and nobleness out-shined their opposition.

In loving memory of Snips, played by Jim Carrey.

The winner, is Snails.

Next time on Equestrian Death Battle...

"Battle of the sidekicks".

Got a suggestion for an Equestrian Death Battle? Comment below who you want to see next.

Battle 11: Pets: Battle Royale

Where there's heroes, there's sidekicks to heroes.

An example of a type of sidekick is a pet. A simple lower working class species that works as a great companion. Equestria has tonnes of these. The Mane 6 have pets themselves.

Twilight's pet owl, Owlowiscious is competing in this battle.

Along with that, we have Applejack's pet dog, Winona.

We also have Rainbow Dash's turtle, Tank.

Tortoise.

Whatever.

Other fighters include Rarity's pet cat, Opalescence,

Pinkie's pet baby alligator, Gummy, the biggest badass in the show.

And Fluttershy's unlikable bunny, Angel.

I'm Static Horn, and he's Milky Wings,

And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armour, and skills to find out who would win an Equestrian Death Battle.

Owlowiscious

Species: Owl

Special Talent: Flying

Twilight's No. 2 assistant

Generally calm

Good at rustling Spike's jimmies

Owlowiscious was discovered by Twilight one night, and was taken up as an assistant for late nights.

Owlowiscious is very relaxed around others, but that doesn't mean he doesn't get angry, especially when Spike is being a complete dumbass. Heh. Don't blame him.

Owlowiscious, like all owls, is nocturnal. Yet, despite being nocturnal, he is actually able to stay awake in the day, showing that he's quite energetic.

And not surprising, because he has wings, he can fly.

Owlowiscious has fairly good reflexes and can travel at a decent speed, even able to get a letter that's at a distance in a small amount of time.

That's not the only example of how good his speed is. Owlowiscious, not surprisingly, is just as wise as other owl's, and wiser than the other pets, even wiser than Spike. Though that's not much of an accomplishment. But how does this affect Owlowiscious' speed? Owlowiscious is so wise and fast, that he can dodge quick attacks, even managing to beat a giant dragon in a fight. Thought he just a walking running gag? You thought wrong.

"Hoo"

Static Horn, that's who. Wait... damnit.

Winona

Species: Dog

Special Talent: Herding

Loyal

Energetic and joyful

Agile

Awwww. She's soooo cuute.

Uh... are you okay...

Winona's soooo adorable...

Wow, and I thought Sweetie Belle had problems with Angel...

But Winona's cuuuuuter.

Ugh. I guess I'm going to have to do this. Winona, like any pet, is loyal to her master, in this case, Applejack. But out of all the pets, Winona appears to be the most loyal.

Tank may have been really loyal to Rainbow Dash, even though she treated him like shit at the time, but Winona is sooooo much more loyal.

Can you please just shut up? Anyways, such evidene of Winona's loyalty is when Spike takes care of the pets. He tries ordering them to stand right in front of him. Winona is the first to do this, symbolising just how loyal she is.

Along with this, she's great at herding animals. She's also sooooo adorable when she does it.

You're starting to creep me out a little...

"Roof!"

Tank

Species: Turtle Tortoise

Special Talent: Nothing

Can fly using a motor propellor

Enjoys Rainbow Dash's company

Misguided

Awwww, Tank is adooorable.

And you complain about my views of Winona...

But they're adooorable together.

Anyways, Tank is a pet of Rainbow Dash, and shares plenty of cute scenes with her. As the name suggests, Tank can take a lot of hits due to his hard shell. And because he's Dash's pet, and is fairly bad, speed wise, he uses a motorised propellor to help himself fly. This gives him more of an advantage. There's only one problem... Tank is very misguided when it comes to flying.

Despite being one of the cuuuutest characters you'll ever see in the show, Tank can't control his flying well. Why? Because he's a fucking tortoise and doesn't know how to fly.

Indeed. Tank is a bad flyer but that still doesn't stop him from having, to some extent, an advantage.

And even with him being slow, Tank appears to be very determined, like when Rainbow Dash treated him like shit. Didn't stop him from giving up. Awwwww.

Going back to his defensive strength, Tank, when he goes into his shell, can withstand any average attack.

I hope the cuuutesy pie doesn't die...

He may... See, there's a backfire to Tank being an incredibly good wall. See, if Tank is caught off guard and doesn't have his head in his shell, others can easily push and shove his shell around, even though he has a hard shell that claws can't injure. Want proof? Look at a few small moments when Spike takes care of the pets. In one scene, when the ponies are coming on a train, and Spike asks the others to hide, Opalescence appears to have the strength to push Tank's shell quickly.

Tank needs to win! God damnit, he really does!

"..."

Opalescence

Species: Cat

Special Talent: Nothing

Quick-tempered

Prefers more relaxing areas

Curious

Opalescence is Rarity's pet cat, curious as can be, like most cats.

Except when Rarity humiliates her. Guess Opal will never live like a normal cat.

Due to this, Opalescence's quick-tempered and persistent aspectof a cat is relied on much more heavily. If angered, Opalescence turns into a demon and attempts attacking anyone that comes near her.

She learnt well from her owner.

And due to her attitude, Opal prefers nothing more than curling up and relaxing, with her anger only able to develop when pushed by someone else.

Along with that, Opal is as curious as other cats, going after what ever comes to mind. Let's hope curiosity doesn't kill the cat. Get it? Get it? Huh? Huh. Aww...

I hate you...

"Meow"

Angel

Species: Bunny

Special Talent: Nothing

Spoilt

Lazy

Inconsiderate

Sneaky

Here it is. The grand one. The character a lot of people hate. I fucking hate Angel. He's a short, selfish brat, who puts himself before others. In the past with characters we hate, one of us would go into a rage while the other would agree but ask us to calm down. But I'm sure Milkywings will agree with me on this, right?

...Not really...

What? But Angel is...

A spoilt kid who enjoys the misery of others.

...Yeah, and...

He cares about noone other than himself, and is ungrateful.

...Yeah, but there's also the incident of...

Fluttershy going to so much trouble to make a recipe for Angel after him being already ungrateful. When she misses out on one tiny ingredient, Angel kicks her out, along with the recipe. But this is why I like Angel.

Say what?

Angel is a spoilt kid, and is a different turn of events. To me, it's always fun to watch him. I definitely agree that he deserves some karma, but he's entertaining.

That's it. I'm leaving. See you in the next battle..

Oh. Guess I have to handle the rest of this. Angel, as we said earlier, is a spoilt kid who's selfish, ungrateful, and always gets his way. To add to the points we made earlier, Angel appears to be able to pack a punch, even managing to overpower Fluttershy, a pony five times bigger than him. Damn. But there is a problem. Angel, while being a really good physical fighter, is very vulnerable on the inside. If he sees an opponent with a likely chance of hurting him, he doesn't fight back, due to him being a young and spoilt child.

"*cough*"

Gummy

Species: Alligator

Special Talent: Being a badass

Doesn't give one buck

Is an alcoholic party animal

Toothless

Wait, it's time for the Gummy analysis? Never mind I'm back!

Um, okay... anyways, Gummy is...

The greatest pet in the show. Tank may be the most adorable, but Gummy is the best. I mean, seriously guys, he can do so many awesome things. He can dance with his tail without making any other body movement, can rip off pages of books with simple claws, can hold a straight face no matter what's going on, and can chew on the bottom of a balloon to make it look like a...

I, think they heard enough... It's a little disgusting... Anyways, hearing everything you said is true...

Of course it's true Gummy is the best pet ever and the best character oh my god he's a bigger badass than Discord that's how amazing he is holy shit I love Gummy sdfklavj;dfgvkfal;ekdmvj;aklewdz,fgmvaio;kldfj,cvmadizklfxcvjm,aewdklzxfc

Uh... why are you saying random letters. How are you making a word out of it.

DON'T QUESTION THE POWER OF I AND THE GODS. OTHERWISE, WE WILL SMITE THEE!

Uh... okay. Anyways, what you said is true. Gummy can do all of those badass things, which is surprising for a baby. But there are a lot of problems to keep in mind. Gummy is an alligator. An alligator's main weapon is its fangs. With this in mind, you'd think Gummy would automatically win, considering its difficult for small animals to overpower an alligator. There's just one problem; Gummy's a baby allligator. It's fangs haven't grown yet so its main weapon is immediately useless. To add to his baby problem, he is much younger than the other pets, meaning they're ahead of him, both in strength, agility, and defensiveness. He may be a great character, but these are flaws to keep in mind.

I'm leaving again...

Ugh, again? Look, I'm not saying Gummy's completely useless... okay maybe I am. Gummy doesn't really do much. He doesn't move very fast, can't fight very well, and is extremely docile. A few good thing to say is that Gummy's gums can chew more sensitive items, like balloons. Also, Gummy sometimes tries his best to mimic actions others do the only ways he knows. This is the best thing about Gummy. He is a delightful copycat to watch. Too bad he has a lot of bad features about him.

"..."

Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. IT'S TIME FOR AN EQUESTRIAN DEATH BATTLE!

Outside Twilight's library, there was rustling in her tree. Owlowiscious flew out calmly, as he hovered above the ground.

Winona came in next, as ecstatic as ever.

Next came Tank, flying in on his propellor, nearly bumping into Owlowiscious, with the owl fortunately dodging the accidental attack.

Angel hopped in next, giving off a determined expression.

Opalescence walked in casually into the battlefield.

Finally came in Gummy, walking slowly in.

Fight! Is that godly enough...

Winona ran at Opalescence, chasing her around in a circle. Angel jumped up fast and kicked Tank at Owlowiscious. Owlowiscious dodged quickly, as Tank began to fall to the ground. Tank put his head in his shell to give it more weight, as he withstood the attack. Gummy simply stood there.

Angel glared at Owlowiscious and began to try and attack him, as he bonked Owlowiscious on the head. Owlowiscious began to lose his cool. He glared at Angel and opened his mouth, chewing on one of Angel's legs, disabling any chance of Angel hopping as high. Angel tried escaping the gras, but Owlowiscious began to chew more, as he bit the leg off.

The three-legged Angel hopped away with fright, but the owl was pursuiting the bunny with its keen eyes. Owlowiscious attempted another bite, but Angel managed to hop above the ground a little, and cause him to hit off the owl's head. Angel crashed into Winona and Opalescence, with the two animals licking their lips in delight. Angel gasped and ran off with the three pets now chasing him.

Tank struggled to get up, and was met by Gummy, who laid on the floor, also struggling.

Owlowiscious, Winona, and Opal continued to chase Angel. Winona bit on one of Angel's legs and started gnawing the leg. Owlowiscious went for one of the ears, as did Opal with another. Angel looked frightened, but noticed Opal with a sign on her saying;

Good luck to my cutest little kitty. Pack a punch. Or paw in your case, Opal

Love, Rarity

Angel grinned, and kicked the three fighters with its legs, injuring them. This was shortlived though as Owlowiscious grabbed hold of the bunny and tossed him in Tank and Gummy's direction, crashing him against the two, and helping them stand again. Angel had a nose bleed after falling to the floor. Gummy slowly walked over and nibbled on the nose, making the bleed slightly worse. Tank tried hovering over to Angel to get a closer look but accidentaly bumped into him, making the pain even more severe.

Suddenly, Owlowiscious crashed in on Angel's back, ipping the bunny in half. Opal and Winona came over. Owlowiscious generally split the dead carcass into three, as the animals ate Angel's flesh, murdering the bunny, nodding while doing so.

Before long, the animals got back into combat. Winona tried biting Opal but she hissed at her, followed by scraping Winona across the face. WInona grew frustrated and began barking even louder, attempting to herd Opalescence, frightening her, as the dog attempted yet another bite.

Owlowiscious and Tank flew up to fight with Gummy watching from below. Tank pushed forward at Owlowiscious, with the owl easily avoiding the attack. Tank crashed on Gummy. Gummy struggled from below but eventually succeeded, with the downside being that he had a now nearly broken back.

Owlowiscious flew down after Tank, who was struggling on the ground. Tank had no other choice. He hid in his shell, causing the owl's attack to do nothing and cause Owlowiscious to bounce off the shell and onto Gummy, breaking his back and spine, killing Gummy.

Winona bit on the shook Opalescence, but soon enough, Opal began to have enough as she let off a growl. Opal lunged at Winona and started scraping the dog across the face. Winona kicked Opal away and gnawed at the cat's fur. Opal opened one paw and wrapped it around Winona, attempting a choke hold. Winona bit the paws away, so Winona tried scrapes from her sharpened claws and tried to hurt Winona with this tactic. Both fighters continued what they were doing until it was no more. Both fighters were down.

Tank and Owlowiscious hovered above the ground and looked at each other with a determined look. Tank attempted an assault with his shell by flying it into Owlowiscious, but the owl easily dodged the attack, and followed it with a kick. Tank crashed into a wall and gave a frustrated look. Tank attempted another attack, but, as usual, Owlowiscious dodged it. Tank expected this, and immediately lifted his head up for a headbutt, and injured Owlowiscious. Owlowiscious maintained its balance and dashed at his opponent, pushing the tortoise away.

Tank and Owlowiscious were neck and neck now. The two fighters pushed themselves at each other with all of their might. Suddenly, Owlowiscious flew back up, tricking Tank. Owlowiscious pecked the now vulnerable shell. Tank was dizzy after going so high and couldn't keep track of his opponent.

To confuse him more, Owlowiscious flew in circles around Tank, giving the tortoise a headache. Owlowiscious finished it off by holding Tank and tossing him to the ground flattening the tortoise, and killing him, leaving nothing left but the remains of a tortoise and an opened shell.

K.O.  Static will be pissed.

This was the most disturbing fight to watch. But it was fucking awesome. Let's go down the lines. I'm on my own, so I guess I'll be the only one discussing this. First down was Angel. He may have packed a punch and was confident about what he was doing, but, under these circumstances, Angel would lose. With Winona, Opal, and Owlowiscious eating Angel, since those animals eat rabbits. Plus, Angel went into the fight without thinking. He never thought true any plans and faced the problem head on, making him lose. Next down was Gummy, for obvious reasons. He was too nimble, too slow, incredibly vulnerable, and just not a good battler in general, with Owlowiscious and Tank killing him. Meanwhile, Winona and Opal were fighting in the grand cat vs dog fight. The match between the two ended in a tie. Winona may have managed to corner Opal, but it was Opalescence's rebel behaviour that made the herding not work 100% in Winona's favor, leaving the two to clash with their teeth and claws. Both were even, and the fight ended up a tie. Hey, I'm not complaining. At least Winona managed to beat someone by herself. This left Owlowiscious and Tank, the two aerial fighters. In the end though, Owlowiscious easily came out on top. Tank is extremely gullible, while Owlowiscious is wise and sassy, managing to outsmart his foe on a number of occasions. Tank may have been hard to take out, but Owlowiscious was stronger, faster, and smarter, resulting in his win. Plus, Tank is not used to the air and can't control it very well, while Owlowiscious can't. This left Tank at a huge disadvantage with no chance of winning. Guess Tank had a h"owl"ing problem. C'mon, I can't think of anything else since Static isn't here. He'll be pissed at the outcome. Anyways, the winner is Owlowiscious.

Next time on Equestrian Death Battle.

"Love Interests of Rarity"

Got a suggestion for an Equestrian Death Battle? Comment below who you want to see next.

Battle 12: Prince Blueblood vs Spike

Equestria may not have the most focus on love interests, but it does give it some insight.

This is the case with two in Equestria that are in love with Rarity. We have the whiny, bitchy, selfish, and feminine asshole, Prince Blueblood.

Against the wimpy, passionate, kind, selfless sidekick, Spike. Gee, I wonder who we should root for?

He's Static Horn, and I'm Milkywings, and it's our job to anlayze their weapons, armour and skills to find out who would win an Equestrian Death Battle.

Prince Blueblood

Pony Type: Unicorn

Special Talent: Unknown; likely similar to Diamond Tiara's

Occupation: Unknown; he likely sucks up to other celebrities for money

Is afraid to get dirty

Knows levitation

Prince Blueblood is another pony hated by everyone.

He's like a male Rarity. Only... without any redeeming qualities.

It is shown briefly that he knows levitation though. So there's that at least.

But what unicorn doesn't know levitation?

Good point. But remember, Blueblood is going against a baby dragon.

But remember, the baby dragon can breathe fire, and can carry many objects.

I guess these fighters are even then.

Maybe so.

Blueblood, apart from having a levitation spell, is very frail. He doesn't like confrontation and instead prefers to be a weakling asshole. He's afraid to get dirty and doesn't know how to punch or dodge properly.

Blueblood does have one really positive factor about him. Sometimes, he can be so annoying, tha he can make you want to kill either yourself, or him.

I think we know who we should root for here...

"Ewww...! Uh, stay back! I just had myself groomed!"

Spike

Species: Dragon

Special Talent: Letter Sending

Occupation: Assistant

Hatched by Twilight

Suffers from possible multiple personality disorder

Spike was found by Princess Celestia. From there, she took him to her school to use as a subject for an entrance exam. When Twilight Sparkle got a burst of energy from the sonic rainboom, she managed to hatch the baby dragon. Ever since, Spike has been Twilight's assistant.

Quite so. Spike does all of the hard work for Twilight, and sleeps in a small basket, rather than a bed.

He's been mentally scarred since.

Spike, like Blueblood, is very frail, and can fall to the floor quite easily. However, he's decently offensive, with the ability to breathe fire. A drawback to this though is that Spike needs to go through some sort of shock or reach a crucial situation to breathe actual fire. He needs to concentrate a lot to breathe fire properly.

He sure is a good fire lighter if you use him properly though. Nice work, A.J.

However, if Spike breathes fire at a different moment, then all that will happen is letters from Trollestia. This leaves Spike very vulnerable from attacks. He's just as vulnerable as Blueblood.

But he sure is braver than Blueblood.

When Spike's obvious love interest, Rarity, was kidnapped by Diamond Dogs, Spike did everything he could to save her life. He used his decently sharp scales, and drilled the Diamond Dog's tails with his own.

But that's not the only time Spike has shown that he's a badass.

Spike managed to save an entire empire from disaster. No matter what happened, Spike saved the crystal heart from impending doom. He risked being eaten, and even while falling to his death, never gave up. Spike breathed fire at Sombra's crystals, jumped off the crystal castle's dark stair without a scratch, and saved the empire. Cadence may have saved his life, but he risked his for the whole empire.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why Spike is a boss.

"Another Donut! Extra Sprinkles!"

Boss.

Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all.

It's time for an Equestrian Death Battle!

Spike kicked the door open of the library, carrying rows of paper. "Well, I'm finally finished writing my fanfiction. I can't wait to get my response", he said gleefully. Just then, Prince Blueblood came in and tossed Spike with his horn, and made Spike accidentaly send the letters. "Not my life's work. It's all I have", Spike said in dissapointment.

FIGHT!

Spike charged at Prince Blueblood, angry at what he did to Spike's life work. Blueblood simply raised a hoof to block Spike, as he smirked pompously. Spike flailed his arms in anger. Blueblood tossed Spike away once again.

Spike was more irritated now. Just then, he remembered the fight he had with Diamond Dogs. He smirked, as he charged at Blueblood once more, this time with his scales pointing at Blueblood. The royal pain tried blocking the shot, but Spike lifted Blueblood up with his sharp scales and knocked the unicorn away. Blueblood got on his feet, and now wanted to fight more.

Blueblood charged ruthlessly at Spike. Spike bounced off the ground and drilled with his tail on Blueblood, lowering the pony to the floor.Blueblood noticed a scratch on him. He felt hurt, almost annoyed. He ran away, screaming like a girl while doing so. Blueblood ran in a circle in fear.

Spike attempted walking over, and trying to continue the fight, but Blueblood was just running in circles. Spike stuck his hand in to try and get another small scratch, but instead got caught by Blueblood's horn, which Spike bounced off of. Blueblood charged in another direction, not knowing where he was going.

Spike became agitated. He tried talking to Blueblood. "It's alright Blueblood, it's jsut a scrath", Spike said.

"Shut it baby", Blueblood ordered.

Spike felt tense. He felt himself feel red in the face. His heart pounded fast. He felt anxious, angry, and irritated. Spike opened his mouth and blew out colossal sized flames. Blueblood screamed, as Spike burned him down completely, murdering the prince. Spike looked over a dead carcass. He looked up, and smiled, proud of his work. Spike grabbed a pair of sunglasses, as he moonwalked off the stage.

K.O.

Well... that shown a different side of Spike...

Blueblood, while being bigger and older, was just not as defensive as the baby dragon. He may have been bigger and older, but he had nothing to really give him the upper hand besides that. He could block Spike's basic physical shots, but when Spike used his own strategy, he overpowered him. Not only that, put he managed to drill Blueblood's tail and cause a scratch.

This caused Blueblood to go on a full on hissy fit, accidentaly injuring Spike for a while. And since Spike is always the negotiator in things, he tried fixing the problem in his loyal nature. But when that happened, Blueblood injured Spike more on the inside, by calling him... a baby.

This caused Spike to shoot the biggest flame he's ever shot. See, Spike is a dragon. When in a crucial situation, Spike's flames grow. This is evident in the King Sombra fight. Besides, Blueblood had nothing to defend himself. No matter how small the flames were, Blueblood would've reached his death eventually.

Sorry Blueblood, but you just couldn't handle the "heat".

The winner is Spike.

Next time on Equestrian Death Battle!

"Battle of Background Pony Duos".

Got a suggestion for an Equestrian Death Battle? Comment below who you want to see next.

Battle 13: Derpy Hooves and Doctor Whooves vs Vinyl Scratch and Octavia

Battle 13: Derpy Hooves and Docter Whooves vs Vinyl Scratch and Octavia

Sometimes, there's duos out there that you love. From the time travelling team of Derpy Hooves, and Doctor Whooves,

To the musical roommates, Vinyl Scratch, and Octavia.

I'm Milkwings, and he's Static Horn, and it's our job to analyze their weapons, armour, and skills to find out who would win an Equestrian Death Battle.

Derpy Hooves                                                     Doctor Whooves

Pony Type: Pegasus                                           Pony Type: Earth Pony

Special Talent: Mail Delivery                               Special Talent: Time Travel

Occupation: Mailpony                                         Occupation: Time Traveller

Klutzy                                                                  Possibly Based off of Doctor Who

Loves muffins                                                     Loves running in mud

Derpy, and Doctor Whooves are a time travelling duo. The two come from two different worlds. Doctor Whooves always tries getting down to the point, but Derpy Hooves just likes going in all directions. But this sense of difference brings the two closer.

You ship them, don't you?

Shut up.

Anyways, let's start with Derpy. Derpy's main job is to deliver mail to others, though she sometimes makes mistakes, such as causing a box full of luggage to fall on Twilight Sparkle, and put her in a wheelchair.

She also enjoys muffins, unless they're baked bads.

Derpy's one big flaw is her klutziness. She can't do something without getting herself and others into trouble. She even once crashed into Ponyville's Town Hall, and broke it. I'll never forget that.

She is Doctor Whoove's Time Travelling assistant, but can't do things right. Nevertheless, The Doctor never fires her because of his inner feelings inside... god damnit, I'm doing it again!

Next, there's Doctor Whooves. Doctor Whooves is a time travelling genius, who is very impatient, and can get easily scared, as shown with when Apple Bloom tries selling him apples.

There appears to be these weird instances where Doctor Whooves is occasionaly a pegasus. So let's just say that he can turn himself into an earth pony, and pegasus.

Doctor Whooves always tries to keep a straight attitude, but normally gets just as eagerly excited when he sees something, as much as he is easily frightened. He has his own time travelling device, to help him, and Derpy travel to different periods of time.

Wow, this  doesn't remind me of a certain "doctor".

"I just don't know what went wrong".

"Could you please just leave me alone?"

Vinyl Scratch                                                      Octavia

Pony Type: Unicorn                                          Pony Type: Earth Pony

Special Talent: Music                                        Special Talent: Music

Occupation: D.J.                                               Occupation: Violin Player

Owns a Bass Cannon                                       Likes to live a more fancier life

Loves to party                                                   Occasionaly depressed

Ah, Vinyl Scratch, and Octavia. how I love them. From Octavia's fancy attitude, to Vinyl Scratch's randomnes, these two are perfect together.

Hah, and you call me a shipper.

Do not disrespect Vinyl Scratch, and Octavia, or you will meet doom!

...

Anyway, let's start with Vinyl Scratch. Vinyl is essentially Pinkie Pie, but instead of a baking interest, it's a musical interest. Vinyl Scratch is outgoing, and optimistic, along with being a lover of parties.

She owns her very own bass cannon, used to shoot a giant plasma ray from what seems like a normal bass. It can vaporize it's opponents. The downgrade is that it shoots in one direction, and also needs some time to recharge before it can be used again.

She is easily oblivious to Octavia's pessimistic nature, and instead treats her in as much of an exaggerated way as possible. Like most unicorns, Vinyl Scratch knows the levitation spell.

Meanwhile, there's Octavia. Octavia is similar to Rarity, in that both want to live a fancy life, but mostly never do. Octavia fits into that category.

While Vinyl Scratch plays the loud dubstep, Octavia plays a soft, and gentle harp. She's very pessimistic, and just wants to live a normal life, but alas, she cannot. More people should call her best background pony.

Octavia generally has a short temper, but keeps patient in whatever random things come her way.

Aww, she has the little bow-tie.

"We crank that bass up to 11, and it cleans the dishes on a microscopic level. Yeah!"

"I was going to be first chair cellist for the royal Canterlot symphony. How is this my life".

Alright, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all.

It's time for an Equestrian Death Battle!

Vinyl Scratch, and Octavia walked into the entrance to The Everfree Forest. Vinyl was pushing along her bass cannon, while Octavia was carrying an unusually big saddle bag.

Doctor Whooves, and Derpy came in to the battlefield, carrying a box of supplies. Derpy chewed on a muffin, while Doctor Whooves looked at Octavia, who also stared at him confidently.

FIGHT!

Octavia left her bag behind, while Vinyl Scratch took care of it. She watched as Octavia charged at Doctor Whooves. Doctor Whooves noticed a nearby mud puddle, as he smiled eagerly. He waited for his opponent to get closer, as he splashed the mud on Octavia, blinding her.

Derpy finished her muffin, but didn't know what to do with the paper. Doctor Whooves grabbed it, and threw it down on the ground, in front of Octavia, who was having trouble seeing. She tripped, and fell. Derpy cheered in delight, as the doctor performed a body slam on Octavia.

Vinyl Scratch took off her glasses in surprise, and glared. She couldn't use her bass cannon yet, as that could potentially hurt Octavia. Instead, Vinyl Scratch opened Octavia's big bag, revealing a violin. She had an idea.

Vinyl Scratch levitated the violin upwards, and threw it at Derpy to distract the doctor. The violin soon came to pieces, as it smashed on the klutzy mailpony. Doctor Whooves gasped, and attended to Derpy's needs, as she scratched her head.

Meanwhile, Vinyl Scratch trotted fast to Octavia's need as she helped her up. Vinyl Scratch grabbed a wub to clean Octavia's face so that she could see. The duo noticed Doctor Whooves trying to help Derpy, but the mare had gained a headache.

VInyl Scratch, and Octavia galloped behind the bass cannon, as Vinyl Scratch pressed the button to fire it. Doctor Whooves noticed this, and tossed Derpy up in the air, making her able to fly again. He grabbed hold of her as the two swiftly avoided the bass cannon while in the air.

Vinyl was now angered. She put her bass cannon aside until it could recharge. Octavia noticed Derpy carrying the doctor up to her box, where an amount of supplies were. Derpy grabbed a piano, while the doctor grabbed a piano.

Doctor Whooves, while being held onto by Derpy, threw the anvil down on Vinyl, and Octavia. The anvil came flying in Vinyl's direction. Octavia suddenly picked up the broken pieces of her violin, and connected them together, so she could shield herself. The anvil broke the violin more. Vinyl gave a sigh of relief.

Derpy held up the piano, but was struggling to hold onto it because of Doctor Whooves being held by her by one hoof. She dropped the piano down on her, and Doctor Whooves back, making them fall to the ground. Derpy looked at Doctor Whooves who was gasping for breath in shock. Derpy gave a fierce look, and held onto Doctor Whooves, as she threw him. The piano came flying down, hurting Derpy.

Doctor Whooves walked over to the mess. His companion opened up the piano. She was covered in blood but managed to hold herself up. Doctor Whooves helped her up. Vinyl, and Octavia stood behind the bass cannon. Vinyl pressed a button, as the bass cannon shot it's ray. Doctor Whooves, and Derpy hugged each other, as they waited for the final blast to vaporize them.

Vinyl Scratch, and Octavia stood proudly at their vaporized opponents. Vinyl turned her cannon off. Octavia looked at a sheet that was falling from the sky. The bass cannon appeared to have hit it, causing it to be creased, with smoke on it. Octavia read the page. Her eyes widened in shock, and slight fear.

K.O.

Well... at least they died together.

Although Derpy, and Doctor Whooves had some heavy weapons, and Derpy could bring the Doctor up in the air for an advantage, the duo ultimately lost.

When a piano came flying downon them, Derpy threw Doctor Whooves to safety. Unfortunately, the piano left her severely injured. But because she's so klutzy, Derpy withstood the attack.

In the end, Vinyl Scratch, and Octavia won. Using Vinyl's weapons, and Octavia's wit, the two ponies managed to triumph. Octavia used her resourcefulness to defend herself from the anvil, and Vinyl had a weapon that could have easily killed them at the beginning.

The funny thing is that Derpy, and The Doctor didn't lose because of Derpy being a featherhead. They naturally lose because they aren't good in fights. They may be likable characters, but both have flaws that contribute majorly to a loss.

Derpy does more than one thing at once, and ends up hurting herself. The Doctor is easily shocked by what's around him. These are two of the worst things to have in a fight. They didn't have much else to help them in the battle, other than Derpy's wings, and their box of supplies.

But even that's ruined by their flaws. In the end, Vinyl, and Octavia ultimately anniliated them with Vinyl's secret weapon.

Vinyl's bass cannon left way more than a "scratch".

The winners are Vinyl Scratch, and Octavia.

Next time on Equestrian Death Battle!

"Battle of the Boasters"

Got a suggestion for an Equestrian Death Battle? Comment below who you want to see next.

A shadowy figure stood looking outside their window, noticing Octavia, and Vinyl Scratch walking home. Octavia had a shocked look, and began talking to Vinyl.

The shadowy figure sighed. "They know." The figure turned to its minions, and some new ones that they had acquired. "We're getting closer. Our plans are almost complete..."

Battle 14: Trixie vs Lightning Dust

Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.

Battle 15: Antagonists: Battle Royale

Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.

Battle 6: Gilda the Griffon vs Lightning Dust

NOTE: THE FOLLOWING IS AN INSPIRATION OF RLYOSHI'S WORK. THE MAIN IDEA COMES FROM RLYOSHI

Well, we’ve seen Gilda defeat Iron Will. But lately we got a submission from Lightning Dust, claiming Gilda looked strong for a Rainbow Dash rival and she wanted to challenge Gilda.

And you accepted it. Need I go into another Gilda rant.

Please don’t. Look, I’m aware that you hate Gilda but our executives told me that your hatred of her is downright disturbing. To avoid viewers getting any more disturbed, they’ve asked that you do no personal hatred towards her. Otherwise, you’ll be fired.

But I have to suffer looking at her fight again. The sad thing, is that I think she may beat Lightning Dust. Can i at least be the one to point out the flaws she has from a combat perspective?

Ugh... sure. Let’s just go over the battle.

Okay then. There’s Lightning Dust, former rival of Rainbow Dash, who even acts like her,

And Gilda, the former rival of Rainbow Dash, only caring about being cool.

He’s Milky Wings and I’m Static Horn.

And it’s our job to analyze their weapons, armour and skills to find out who would win an Equestrian Death Battle.

Gilda

Creature Type: Griffon

Special Talent: Unknown; most likely something to do with speed and force

Occupation: Unknown

Hates anything un-cool

Suffers from peer pressure

Suffers from jealousy

Suffers from narcissism

As we’ve seen, Gilda managed to absolutely destroy Iron Will using her brute strength and anger.

She still has flaws though. Gilda not only has problems with her bullying, it’s that this comes from peer pressure, jealousy and narcissism. Her narcissism is even worse than Rainbow Dash’s. Hah, get it? Get it...?

A little heavy don’t you think?

Uh... yeah I guess...

Good. Anyways, what Static says is true. Gilda hasn’t really matured fully in behaviour. She always wants attention from others. Along with that, she has a tendency to be a slight show-off, going to great lengths to be the best. As we’ve stated before, Gilda represents a few negative aspects of Rainbow Dash.

Nevertheless, Gilda has trained in brute force for a long time. Her beak is very powerful, as is her talons, which we’ve seen. Gilda, if tempered, will lose her temper and go insane. I mean, insane. May you rest in peace, Iron Will. Another thing is that Gilda, when angered, has the power to do just about anything with her force. She is someone to be very careful with.

See how easy role reversal was?

...No.

"Don't you know how to take "get lost" for an answer? Dash doesn't need to hang with a dweeb like you now that I'm around! Now make like a bee, and buzz off!”

Lightning Dust

Pony Type: Pegasus

Special Talent: Speed

Occupation: Unknown, once Wonderbolt tryout

Represents more negative aspects of Rainbow Dash

Former friendly rival of Rainbow Dash

Leaves a lightning trail behind as she speeds unlike a rainbow trail

Lightning Dust was once a tryout for the Wonderbolts as she entered the Wonderbolt Academy. Unfortunately, she was discovered to be too reckless, no matter how much she pushed her limit.

Just like Gilda, Lightning Dust represents the negative aspects of Rainbow Dash

As mentioned by Spitfire, Lightning Dust likes to push herself to the limit. She goes to great lengths, even if it means endangering one’s working with her. As such, Lightning Dust is one who only cares about herself. She never gives up on a task, no matter how hard it may be.

She is also childish. On the bright side though, her speed is equal to that of Rainbow Dash. Her reflexes with Dash are also equal, able to recover from dizziness in near seconds. No matter what the consequence, Lightning Dust never gives up.

If she didn’t have those flaws, she would be even better than Rainbow Dash at combat.

This pony... means business.

“Let me show you what I've got, ma'am."

Alright, the combatants are set. Let’s end this debate once and for all.

It’s time for an Equestrian Death Battle!

Cloudsdale appeared, looking as peaceful as ever, when suddenly, Gilda landed in, with a straight glare. Lightning Dust zipped into the battlefield, looking as confident as ever. Pegasus ponies flew away in fear, aware of the danger that would befall on them if they stayed in the same area.

FIGHT!

Lightning Dust immediately circled Gilda, making the griffon not know where her opponent actually is. Gilda laid out a leg to trip Lightning, making her foe fall down.

Gilda grinned and proceeded to try and swipe Lightning Dust in the face. Lightning Dust dodged all of Gilda’s hits. Gilda grew annoyed and used both her claws to try and swipe Lightning Dust. One claw managed to swipe Lightning.

Lightning ignored the scar on one of her cheeks and charged straight into Gilda from the air. Gilda swung her talons the whole way around, slamming Lightning Dust. Lightning Dust dashed fast into Gilda, with Gilda trying to defend with her claws. The two continued to tussle before they reached a gap at Cloudsdale and dropped down. Both got their wings ready before they could fall and hurt themselves.

Lightning Dust flew away fast, confusing Gilda. The griffon moved forward slowly, wondering where her opponent was. Just then, Lightning Dust lunged in fast to kick Gilda. Gilda grabbed Lightning Dust’s hoof to spin her around, and then threw her down fast.

Lightning Dust was falling from the air fast, spinning. Lightning Dust, after eight seconds, got her wings under control, although she had a major headache. Lightning Dust zoomed up fast to reach Gilda’s level. She tried a head butt but Gilda blocked her from it by putting her claw out, blocking the attack. Lightning Dust tried to force through Gilda’s claw but it was not working. Gilda kicked Lightning Dust with one of her legs and sent her up in the air.

Lightning Dust was sick of this. She sped down at Gilda. Gilda expected Lightning to do the same routine so she put her claw out again. Instead though, Lightning Dust left before colliding with the claw. Gilda was once again confused but then she noticed Lightning Dust circling her. Gilda shook her head in disbelief, knowing Lightning was doing the same thing as before. Gilda put out a leg to trip Lightning. Unfortunately, Gilda didn’t know that Lightning wasn’t at the same level as the claw. She was at the same level as Gilda’s neck. Gilda tried headbutting Lightning again but Lightning Dust quickly slapped Gilda with her hoof before she had the chance, using her reflexes.

Gilda pecked Lightning Dust quickly in response but Lightning Dust deflected the hit by kicking the beak away from her. Gilda tried to slap Lightning Dust with her talons but Lightning Dust quickly manoeuvred away from all the assaults and grabbed Gilda’s tail, spinning Gilda around and throwing her down.

After twelve seconds, Gilda recovered from the spin and was even more annoyed. She dashed back up at Lightning Dust. Lightning Dust quickly dodged Gilda at the right moment, just a few inches away. Lightning Dust dashed into a Gilda red in the face. Gilda went with her final option. Gilda opened her mouth and got Lightning Dust caught in her mouth. She didn’t want to waste time chewing her opponent as she simply wanted to get this over with. She waited until she thought Lightning was dead and smiled. Suddenly, she heard a rumbling in her stomach. Lightning Dust sped out of her throat, covered in blood. Gilda was bleeding. Lightning Dust finished Gilda off by attacking her with a wave of dashes.

Lightning smiled as she looked at the dead Gilda. In the air though, she suddenly heard a breeze. Rainbow Dash had swooped in. It turned out that Discord had used a resurrection spell to make Rainbow Dash come back to life. Rainbow Dash grinned at Lightning Dust, wanting to settle this.

Lightning Dust dashed in fast to Rainbow Dash but Rainbow Dash immediately kicked her away. Lightning Dust flashed around Rainbow Dash in a circle like she did with Gilda but Rainbow Dash followed the pattern, following Lightning Dust in the circle, until eventually catching her. Rainbow Dash flipped Lightning Dust by spinning her. Lightning easily caught her grip but before she could fly back up, Rainbow Dash immediately crashed fast into her to prevent this from occurring. Rainbow Dash slapped, punched, kicked and headbutted Lightning Dust.

Rainbow Dash punched her foe down as she made her way to the ground. Her foe was dizzy on the ground, incredibly injured. Rainbow Dash flew in and out of bushes and then made the clouds spin to build up speed. She flew up fast and sped down fast, trying to push through the sound barrier. Rainbow Dash pushed harder and harder until she finally broke through.

Lightning Dust recovered and noticed her opponent. Lightning Dust sped up fast into Rainbow Dash. The two dashed fast into each other. An explosion occurred, with smoke covering their area.

Eventually the smoke cleared. All that was left was Rainbow Dash. A dead Lightning Dust was on the ground.

K.O.

Rainbow Dash?! I thought she died?

Well, Discord used resurrection and he is the master of trolling...

Fair enough. Now let’s go over the outcome.

Lightning Dust managed to kill Gilda. Sure, Gilda did gain an advantage to some extent when her anger grew again, but because Lightning Dust is such a quick thinker, she used her speed in the end to fool her opponent. Gilda is strong, sure, but she’s not as quick of a thinker.

She ate Lightning Dust... and then Lightning Dust dashed out of her throat...

Then there was the surprise visit of Rainbow Dash.

Rainbow Dash ultimately managed to beat Lightning Dust from being smarter. I mean, yeah, Lightning Dust was weakened, but even if she still had the same amount of energy, Rainbow Dash would win for the basic reason that she has better strategy.

Static, I just asked Discord about why he randomly brought a pony back to life.

Why?

He said that he was bored.

Oh... well... uh... Looks like Gilda should’ve been as quick as “lightning” to catch up,

And it looks like Lightning Dust relied too much on ‘dashes’ rather than being a better thinker.

Darn. I’m not allowed to insult Gilda in this battle and you stole a pun I was going to use. This is not my day.

The winner of the first battle, is Rainbow Dash

Next time on Equestrian Death Battle!

“Two battlers that love apple pie”