Last Hearth's Warming
The lights of the department store flashed on with an electric buzz, lighting up row by row by row. They revealed trees decorated in garland and bobbles, displays trimmed with gold and white, and shelf upon shelf styled with fake ice and snow. Great, sweeping sheets of red and green and silver hung across the walls, declaring various holiday sales for all the ponies who would trot through the store that day. The store had all the latest toys, all the seasonal classics, and a heaping helping of every little thing a mare or stallion could possibly need to fulfill their loved ones' wishes – material or otherwise.
An Earth-pony stood in the store, rubbing his eyes as they adjusted to the light. His mane and coat were blue, his mane a darker shade than his fur. His cutie mark too was dark blue: a pair of beamed quarter notes. He seemed terribly tiny in the emptiness of the store, though truth told he would have seemed tiny even without the vastness of it beside him. A kinder pony might have called him svelt; a less-kind pony would have noted his build was almost effeminate. Whichever it was, his name was Blues, and he made a mental note to put away some of the more sultrily-adorned mannequins before the store opened.
For now, though, he sat, basking in some small sort of wonder at the majesty of the place. True it was nothing special when compared to the other seasonal decorations of Canterlot, but there was something captivating about it nevertheless. The cerulean colt unwrapped his scarf and shrugged out of his warm coat. A small, sad smile played across his lips.
He found himself sniffling a bit as he trotted out into the store, the chilly mountain air clinging inside his nose. He rubbed it, plodding idly in and out of the aisles. He took a mental stock of everything as he passed through, mostly for his own curiosity. A proper account would need to be taken before the store opened, though fortunately there would be more ponies involved than just himself.
Lets see, he thought as he entered the toy section, We've got twelve Golden Guard toys, eleven Smarty Pantses, ten Mare-Do-Well dolls... He smirked, chuckling to nopony in particular as he recounted the toys. There were indeed twelve, eleven and ten of each respectively. He trotted out of the toy section and into the book section. Nine Daring Do tales, eight Crimson Wonders, Seven Joy of Bakings...
A wide grin was plastered across the colt's face as he pranced through the store, his thoughts becoming song in the silence of the morning. “Six Cookie Cutters, fiiiiiiive icing piiiiipes, four sets of stockings, three beard trimmers, two knockoff albums...” He trotted gleefully around a corner, mouth open wide to sing the last note, when he nearly ran smack-dab into an outstretched hoof.
“AND A NOVELTY LUMP OF COOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAL!”
“Gah!” Blues shouted, starting violently and jumping backwards. His hooves caught on a rut in the rug, sending him stumbling, tripping, and finally crashing into a nearby display of stuffed animals. The table flipped, lions and tigers and bears taking to the sky like a colony of bats, only to come crashing back down on the colt's head in a heap.
Blues wheezed, pounding at his chest as though to restart his startled heart. He struggled to return to an upright position, flopping through the pile of plush to stare at the pony who had startled him: A great, rotund stallion with a beard as thick as a wild bush that somehow completely failed to hide the wide and joyous grin behind it. His coat was the colour of a fir tree, his mane tucked up under a crimson tyrolean, matching the suspenders that ran along his shoulders and gut. Completing the image and true to his lyrics, the stallion held a lump of candy coal in his outstretched hoof.
“Princesses, Mr. Tannenbaum,” Blues said as he finally managed to pull himself out of the pile. “You scared the life out of me. I didn't think you were in yet.”
“Hah!” The stallion laughed, withdrawing the coal and helping blues to his hooves. “No, no, I got in hours ago! So much to do these days, you know. Getting close to Hearth's Warming!”
“How come you turned the lights off?” Blues asked. He tipped the table back upright, beginning to gather the stuffed toys as his employer spoke.
“Would you believe me if I said that I wanted to see which of my employees would be the first to show up today?” he asked. Blues looked back over his shoulder, smirking.
“Lucky me,” he said. “So what do I win?”
“My respect, of course!” Mr. Tannenbaum replied, trotting over and patting Blues heavily on the back. He paused, reaching over and turning a stuffed bear to catch the light a bit better, and grinned. “But no, I just wanted the new decorations to be a surprise. Today's a big day you know, Blues.”
“First day of the Hearth Warming's shopping season?” Blues asked as the last of the stuffed animals was replaced.
“No, no,” the stallion replied. “Hearth's Warming shopping begins the day after the last Hearth's Warming!” Blues' ears tilted back a little, his smile fading almost imperceptibly. If Mr. Tannenbaum noticed he made no mention of it, continuing in his usual boisterous manner. “No,” he said, “today is the day we get the new employees for the rush!”
The ponies began to walk, Mr. Tannenbaum leading Blues through the store. As they walked the colt looked around, inspecting all the nooks and crannies of the decorations he had not seen from the back door earlier, and he found himself wondering if the rotund businesspony had found the time to sleep the previous night. The department store was no dismal place, true, but there was something to the new decorations that made the place feel less like a simple store and more like something communal. There was a hoof-hung quality to the decorations, done without care for scrutinizing ponies. As though the decorator content in the knowledge that the spirit of the season would help ponies to look past an old stallion's clumsiness and appreciate the thought that had gone into it. The colours were warm and the store was a toasty haven away from the winter's deep chill, and in just an hour's time it would be filled to the brim with holiday shoppers and holiday cheer.
Blues sighed wistfully, his hooves slowing just a tad. “Well Mr. Tannenbaum,” he said, “let's just hope that they share your eternal enthusiasm for the holidays.”
“They ought to,” Mr. Tannenbaum declared, “I hoof-picked most of them! You know after last year that we all need all the holiday spirit we can get these next few weeks, eh Blues?” He nudged the colt cheerfully, who smirked.
“Uh, Mr. Tannenbaum,” he said, “I wasn't here last Hearth's Warming. I didn't start working here until this May.”
“You didn't?” The evergreen Earth Pony tapped his chin idly, thinking back over the year.
“Nope,” Blues said, shaking his head. “I lived in... um, I lived in Ponyville last Hearth's Warming. I moved here late February.”
Mr. Tannenbaum nodded, furrowing his brow in concentration. “Well... well shoot, so you didn't!” he laughed, throwing a hoof around the colt's shoulders and shaking him. Blues' ears pinned back against his neck shyly, and he rolled his eyes. In spite of himself, though, he couldn't help but grin at the old stallion's good cheer.
“I'm sorry, Blues,” Mr. Tannenbaum said. “You're such a good employee here that I figured you'd been around a lot longer. How'd you get so trustworthy in just six months?”
The colt almost took the moment to point out he had the time to spare for dedication, but bit his tongue. He instead grinned in an approximation of cheekiness. “Um... all your other employees are city ponies?” he said. Mr. Tannenbaum laughed.
“That's right!” the stallion said, patting Blue's chest heartily. “You're a country pony, like me! Maybe not old country like me, but country is country! We know how to rise with the sun, eh Blues?” he chuckled again as though at some private joke. “I'll bet you also know to drink coffee with the best of the country boys.”
At this Blues smirked more genuinely. He rubbed his eyes, and flicked his ears. “Hey, I'm a musician, Mr. Tannenbaum. Country or city, coffee is one thing I know.”
“Wonderful!” Mr. Tannenbaum said. He patted the colt's back heavily, causing Blues to stagger a bit, but he recovered as his employer started to take off. “Come with me, Blues,” Mr. Tannenbaum said, “and I'll show you how we make coffee in the old country!”
The pair trotted through the rows of the department store, plodding along to the employee lounge. As they did, Blues began to notice the odd stallion or mare weaving their way through the aisles, clipboards in hoof and aprons tied around them. While Blues had been distracted, it seemed, his coworkers had begun to file in for their morning duties. Many of the older employees had an air of dourness about them, a sort of wariness. In spite of the festivity of the season, holiday cheer was the last thing on their minds. They were preparing for the rush to come.
Blues was about to ask Mr. Tannenbaum if he shouldn't start helping them get ready when they entered the lounge. The rotund stallion closed the door firmly behind them, his bright smile fading a tad. Blues' ears lowered faintly as mr. Tannenbaum gestured for him to take a seat at the table.
“Er... is something wrong, Mr. Tannenbaum?” Blues asked. The stallion shook his head, his belly swaying to and fro from the unfamiliar action.
“No, no,” Mr. Tannenbaum said slowly. He was silent for a while, save for the clinking of spoon against mug as he fixed the promised coffee. He placed two mugs on a tray, which he carried to the table and offered to Blues. The colt took one, nodding thankfully as his employer sat down.
“No,” Mr. Tannenbaum said again. “Actually, I simply had a favour to ask of you.”
“A favour,” Blues repeated, sipping at the coffee. It was strong and tasted thick, like syrup. No, more like pitch: jet black and powerful smelling. His fur stood on end, and he suddenly felt several degrees more awake. He leaned in, listening to Mr. Tannenbaum's request.
“Now, I don't know what things tended to get like this time of year in Ponyville,” the bearded stallion said, sipping from his own coffee, “but here in Canterlot things can get... a bit hectic around this time of year. Ponies mean well enough, but they get stressed. We hire on extra hooves to take care of the rush, make things go a little smoother for all of us.”
“Right,” Blues said. “You mentioned that earlier, that you'd hired them already.”
“Of course, of course I did,” Mr. Tannenbaum continued. He leaned back in his chair, patting his belly idly. “Of course, like I said... ponies mean well. The spirit is there, or else they wouldn't be out here. Lot of 'em forget, though. They get stressed out in the rush and they get... impatient. It can be rough on the new hires if they aren't prepared for it.” He scratched his beard, as though buying time to consider his words. “Now, Blues,” he said, “I know you haven't been with us as long as some of the other workers here, but you're one of the best. I was sort of hoping that you'd train one of the new hires.”
Blues stared at his employer over his mug, his eyes wide and brows high, as though they too were surprised by this development. “you'd like... me to train the new hires?” he asked.
“Not all of them,” Mr. Tannenbaum corrected. “Just the one. Each one of them'll get a specific teacher to shadow, I just want you to be one of 'em.”
Blues rubbed his neck, staring down into his mug. “I... I dunno, Mr. Tannenbaum. I'm... not sure I'd be that great of a teacher.”
“Bah!” Mr. Tannenbaum scoffed, leaning in. “Blues, you'd be great! You're great with ponies! The customers love you! The music sales have gotten quite the boost since you started working here. Plus, you're the best in that department by a long shot, the way you throw yourself into work! If anyone could show him how the store runs, it's you.”
“Eh...” Blues shrugged. “Being good with customers and being able to teach aren't... really the same thing.” He sipped at his coffee, unspoken words dashing through his head. For a start, I don’t have to see customers ever again...
“Well, look,” Mr. Tannenbaum said, wringing his hooves. “Just give it a chance today, alright? If it looks like things aren't working out, we can shift him over to someone else. But you're one of my best, and he'd be working nearby you.”
“Nearby?” Blues asked, raising an eyebrow.
“That's right,” Mr Tannenbaum said. “Music won't really need that much of a bump. He's working in toys, right next door to you.”
But not withme, Blues thought to himself. “Well... I guess...” He shifted uncomfortably in his seat, taking another deep sip of the coffee. It's warmth pooled in his belly, ebbing gently out through him. With the warmth in his limbs, he could feel himself growing bolder. Not much, but just enough. “One day couldn't hurt, I guess.”
“Wonderful!” Mr. Tannenbaum said, clapping his hooves. He downed his coffee in a single gulp, nearly dropping it against the table in haste. “I have to get off to assign the other new hires, but I'll introduce you to him right away.” He looked over his shoulder, cupping a hoof to his mouth and belting out, “HEY, CREME BRULEE!”
There was a soft clattering sort of noise behind the door, followed by a brief pause and an even briefer click. The door crept open, pushed by a broad nose. A stallion came into view, and Blues felt his eyes bug out. If his mouth did not hang open, it was only due to conscious effort on his part.
The stallion was a handsome shade of orange, the same colour as his namesake. His mane was a deep and chocolatey shade of brown, draped thick and long over his broad neck, and a trio of horseshoes was emblazoned on his flank. The store's apron uniform was tied over his chest, for all the good it would do; It barely even began to cover the stallion’s bulging barrel, which stood supported by thick legs and cream-coloured hooves. Even in his dumbfounded state Blues found it appropriate that the stallion reminded him of sweets.
“Yes?” the stallion asked, shaking Blues from his thoughts before they dared to wander to imaginings of other treats. Blues shook his head, snapping back to earth as Mr. Tannenbaum stood.
“Morning, Creme!” the manager said, giving Creme Brulee a hearty pat on the shoulder. As he done with Blue he draped a foreleg around the stallion's shoulders, leading him over to the table and sitting him down. "Creme, this is Blues. He works in the music section right next to you."
"Uh, hi," Blues said, hoping desperately that the warmth he felt in his cheeks was not a blush. He sipped at his coffee. Creme smiled a calm sort of smile, lifting his hoof.
"Hey," he replied. His voice was soft, and just husky enough that Blues imagined it might be quite intimidating if the stallion ever thought to raise it. Fortunately he seemed content to leave it at that, allowing Mr. Tannenbaum to do what he did best.
"Blues here is gonna show you the ropes of the store before we get started this morning, and he'll be keeping an eye on you throughout the day as well. Make sure that you get everything operating smoothly. Blues is one of our best employees, so you're in good hooves."
"That's good to hear," Creme said, smiling wider. "I've never really worked retail before, so it'll be nice to have someone experienced to work under."
"Oh, well," Blues said, looking down, to the side, anywhere but at Creme, "Mr. Tannenbaum is a flatterer, really. I've been here awhile, is all."
"Well, even still," Creme replied. "Experience is experience, after all."
"Aheh," Blues said. "Right..." He coughed, rubbing his neck. Creme was silent as well, though his silence seemed significantly less awkward. In the end it was Mr. Tannenbaum who would end the silence, as usual. He clapped his hooves smartly together, taking a step back and nodding to the pair. "Well," he said cheerfully, "I've got more teams and trainers to get set up. There'll be a quick pep-talk by the doors ten minutes before we open, but until then, Blues, you can give Creme the lay of the land and give him the rundown on what we'll be doing here. Got it?"
"Er, yeah," Blues said. He stood, draining the last of his coffee and smiling. "Sure thing Mr. Tannenbaum."
The stallion in question flashed a toothy grin through his beard, tipping his hat. "Ah, company policy, Blues. It's Uncle Tannenbaum for the next three weeks. Just remember!"
In spite of himself, Blues couldn't help but chuckle as the old stallion cantered out of the room, laughing heartily. Something about his boundless enthusiasm, his endless fountain of Hearth's Warming spirit, put a smile on the colt's face in a season that had thus far left him dour. Still, Blues supposed, the season was only just beginning. Perhaps smiling was the menu of the month. Goodness knows it was what he needed, lately.
With these thoughts in mind he turned back to his charge, who was sitting at the table with a soft, contented smile on his face, staring at the door their manager had left through. "Quite the character," he said. Blues' smile faded a bit, but he tried his hardest not to let it show.
"Mr. Tannenbaum?" he asked.
"Uncle Tannenbaum," Creme corrected, chuckling quietly. Blues smirked.
"Heh... right. Uncle Tannenbaum." He shook his head. "But um, yeah. He's... an interesting guy. Good boss, though. Cares about his employees." He shuffled his hooves idly for a moment, searching for some conversation to make, or at least something to break the silence. "I, um, know getting hired on for a rush is a pretty raw deal, but if you work well I'm pretty sure he'll see what he can do about about bringing you on at least part time."
Creme chuckled again, louder and longer this time. The noise was like a rumbling of thunder in distance. "I don't think I'm too worried about that," he said. Blues tilted his head, raising an eyebrow.
"Not here for any longer than the holiday?" he asked. Creme shook his head.
"No," he said, "I'll keep the job here as long as I need to. I mean I'm not worried about not doing well enough to keep it. After all," he winked at Blues, whose ears drooped slightly. "I've got one of the best employees showing me the ropes, right?"
"Er... he. Right," Blues replied, rubbing his neck. He hummed, trying to dispel, or at least ignore, the faint twisting in his gut, but it didn't seem to work. Instead he put on a smile, trotting over to the door. "Right, well... I guess we'd better get started if I'm gonna... um, impart it all to you, right?" he asked.
Creme nodded, standing up from the table. He trotted after Blues, somehow managing to plod slowly and still cross the gap with surprising speed. Blues opened the door quickly, almost jumping through as Creme trailed after.
This close, Blues gained a new perspective on the bulky stallion. He had looked big from a distance, certainly, but what Blues had been unable to tell was just how big he was. Blues' head scarcely cleared his shoulder. Ears and all he was still a good head shorter than Creme. Even the orange stallion's breadth was more impressive up close, though it was less a matter of measurements and more a matter of a general feeling of bigness.
Creme had a sort of presence about him: a strange, warm contentedness. It was as though he was fully aware of his size, but rather than lord it as a meaner pony might, or hide it as a meeker pony might, he had simply learned to come to terms with it. He was at peace, deft in his bigness. It was a strangely comforting feeling to be around a stallion so calm, though Blues was far from comforted himself.
His ears flicked back faintly, more limp than held down. He stared straight ahead, trying his hardest never to look at the form beside him - even if the sheer mass of it made this difficult.
"So," Blues said suddenly, trying to break the silence. They turned onto the store's main floor, heading for the sweeping, circular aisles that encompassed the music section. "I'm gonna, um, take you to my department and show you how I do things there. Then we'll swing by yours, and see you do the same... does that sound good?"
"Sure," Creme said, nodding. "I'm sure you know what you're doing. Seems like a good enough plan."
Blues smiled wryly. "Right," he said. Right... I totally know what I'm doing. He shook his head, sighing under his breath. Fortunately for him they had arrived at the music section. Already he could feel his mind beginning to sharpen, focusing on the day ahead. He smiled genuinely as he felt the twisting in his belly even out.
"So," he said, rolling his shoulders, "most of what we do is honestly pretty simple. We start with checking the register." He trotted behind the wide desk of the checkout, leaning up on the counter and letting his hoof hover over the open button for a few moments, to demonstrate its position to Creme. The stallion nodded gently in understanding, and Blues pressed down. It opened with an almost musical chime, revealing an empty tray.
"Each of the rows hold 20 bits," Blues said idly, already opening a drawer under the desk. "The register holds a total of 200 bits. Once it's full, you empty it into the cash box, and mark down that you have. At the end of the day you'll be able to tell how much is in the cash box by how many times you've emptied the register. Seem simple enough?"
"Ooh, I dunno," Creme said, rubbing the back of his neck. "They didn't tell me I'd be doing math at this job."
There was a silence for a time. Blues stared, unblinking, at Creme. Creme stared back. The stallion coughed eventually, rubbing his neck once again.
"Right," Creme said, "So I don't make jokes. Yeah, that um, makes sense. Easy enough to do, as long as I can empty the register into the change box fast enough not to hold up the customers... you're an earth pony too; did you have trouble with that part of it at first?"
"Huh?" Blues asked, shaking his head. "No, I'm, uh... er, no. No, it's not as hard as it seems once you get used to it. I mean, I'm probably not the best colt to ask, though. I play the guitar, so my hooves were already a bit... you know."
"Adroit?" Creme offered. Blues stared at him for a while again, but shrugged.
"Sure," he said, chuckling awkwardly. "I'll take your word for it. And, um, sorry about not getting your joke."
Creme smiled, shaking his head and leaning over the counter. "Don't worry about it too much," he said. "It's my fault for making a joke like that. I mean, looking like I do, ponies assume..."
Blues winced visibly, his ears dropping back. He was acutely aware of the stallion's meaning this time, considering how he had just demonstrated it. "No no," he lied desperately, "I just, uh... I'm a bit tired this morning. Or, well, out of it." That's... almost the truth, he thought to himself. He ducked behind the counter, ostensibly to put the changebox away, but in reality it was to wait until the guilty blush had faded from his face. Just... focus on work, Blues. Store opens in fifteen minutes, and then you can ignore him for the rest of the day.
He emerged from behind the counter, a smile only mildly disingenuous on his lips. "Well," he said, rubbing his hooves together, "next we have to take stock of what we've got on the floor. We need to know how many we start the day with and how many we end with. It's only really necessary at the end of the day, since Mr. Tannenbaum gets everything restocked every night anyways, so he knows how many we start the day with. I like to do it in the mornings anyways. Helps me pass the time until the store opens."
"You come in early?" Creme asked.
"Um... yeah," Blues said, blinking in surprise at the sudden question. "Yeah, usually. Why do you ask?"
"Oh, I dunno," Creme answered. "Just curious, I suppose. I mean, kinda wondering why you come in so early if you need to find something to do."
"Oh..." The colt shrugged. He felt a sudden tenseness in his shoulders. "I... don't like spending more time than necessary in my apartment."
"Not a nice place?" Creme asked.
"Something like that. I don't really wanna talk about it."
"Hey, I get it," Creme said. "I heard you and Uncle Tannenbaum talking in the break room. Heard you say you only moved here earlier this year. You're new to the city, any apartment will do, and you get stuck in a lease at a junky place. It happens."
"Yeah," Blues said a bit sharply. "We'll go with that. Can we, uh, get back to the training? We've got ten minutes before the store opens, I just wanna make sure we've got everything. Let's go over to the toys section, okay?"
"Sure," Creme said, taking a few tentative steps. Blues walked slowly around the counter, falling in stride with the stallion. "...Just trying to make conversation, is all," Creme said. Blues sighed.
"Sorry," he said. "I don't mean to be short. It's just..."
"Holiday season stress?" Creme asked. Blues shrugged.
"Yeah, I guess that's the long and short of it," Blues said. This, too, was almost the truth. He sighed again, rolling his shoulders to try and alleviate the tightness. "Still, I'm sorry I snapped at you."
Creme merely shook a hoof, smiling. "Let's make sure I've got this, huh?" he asked. Blues smiled, nodding.
"Right," he said. "So, to open the register is..."
"This button," Creme answered, tapping the key in question, opening the register with a clack and a ding.
"And the changebox?"
"Under the counter here, right?" Creme asked, leaning down and producing a heavily locked box.
"I guess so," Blues said. "So that's, um... that's training, I guess.”
Creme chuckled. "What, not gonna drill me on company mottos and corporate philosophy?"
Blues paused, tapping his chin and humming thoughtfully. "Um..." He grinned awkwardly and swung his hoof. "Sell stuff?" he said. Creme laughed, tossing his head back. His laughter was deep and booming, almost shocking compared to his normal soft-spoken tone. The sound was not unpleasant, though. There was an almost musical quality about it, not unlike the beating of a drum in the distance.
"Alright," he said. "No advice on selling stuff?"
Blues grinned a bit wider, shrugging. "Being nice usually works for me," he said. "Also, ponies seem to like it when you suggest that they buy the thing they were thinking of buying." Creme grinned wider, reaching across the counter to nudge the colt.
"Now there's some sales advice," he said.
Blues flushed faintly at the gentle push, flicking his ears. He grinned cheekily, and was about to reply with a remark when the soft crackle of the PA was heard. A soft gong rang out through the store, and Blues' cheeky smile faded just a bit.
"Ah," he said, "That's our cue, I guess. Mr. Tannenbaum is gonna be giving his pep talk soon."
"Do we need to do anything?" Creme asked. His smile had faded more noticeably, but there were lingering traces of it nonetheless, hiding in the corner's of his mouth and waiting for their time to return. Blues shook his head.
"Naw," he said. "Afterwards the greeters will unlock. We just need to be at our stations. Which reminds me, I won’t be able to pay a lot of attention to you from Music. You gonna be alright?"
"Yeah, I think so," Creme said. "I think I can manage a bit of math."
"Hey, if you're sure," Blues said. "I'll be right over there if you need me. Don't hesitate to ask. Better to hold up the line a little bit then to make a mistake and bring the whole thing down around our ears.”
"Thanks," Creme said, smirking. Blues winced faintly, and was about to apologize when he heard the PA chime again for the pep talk. Apologies would have to wait for later, it seemed. The pair cantered towards the front doors, settling into the back of the crowd of employees as Mr. Tannenbaum addressed them.
***
The day passed in a blur. When the Hearth's Warming rush came, it seemed, it came hard. The few times he dared to consider it Blues shuddered to think of what it become like the closer the fateful day came. As it was there was enough to do to keep him busy, occupied with gentle encouragements, musical recommendations and informing ponies that they offered gift wrapping for only one Bit extra.
Still, the day was not completely taken up by work. More than once Blues found his eyes drifting away from the register, glancing over the rows of the section next to his. Of course, he told himself, he needed to pay attention to Creme, at least out of the corner of his eye. The stallion had been left under his care, after all. Not that one would guess from Blues' imaginings. No amount of reasoning or validation could hide the lingering glances, the slow consideration, going far beyond mere appraisal.
Creme was good at his job. Truth told, Blues knew that he would have been able to ignore the stallion for the rest of the day, and everything would turn out fine. Creme's gentle demeanor translated well to salesstallionship, it seemed. Blues found himself glancing over again, only to find the stallion hunched over and deep in conversation with a young filly. She was holding two stuffed toys in her grasp, one a bunny and the other a bear. She seemed to be having quite the time deciding on which to get. The two bantered back and forth for sometime, and while they were too far away for Blues to hear, he felt as though he could hear Creme's soft voice drifting out, gently reassuring her. In the end she set down both of the toys, instead picking up a big blue and green plush dragon. Together they took it to the counter, where Creme wrapped a big red bow around it, and the filly's parents paid - each and every moment with a smile across all their faces.
Creme looked up from the counter, his eyes meeting Blues'. He smiled, lifting a hoof in that calm half-wave of his. Blues' face flushed, and he turned away sharply, his ears drooping back against his neck. He tried to occupy his mind with thoughts other than how Creme had come to be here instead of on the cover of some cheesy romance novel, and he was found himself aided by the sharp "hem" of the mare waiting at the register for him. He greeted her with something approaching genuine cheer, happy to have his mind off of the stallion. She was gone soon enough though, leaving him alone. He sighed wearily, feeling his eyes once more wandering for the stallion as the time continued to slip away.
The sun fell soon enough, as it was wont to do this time of year. The soft light of the early evening filtered through the windows as the last few customers mulled around the floor. Mr. Tannenbaum was going from pony to pony, gently prodding them out the door with a combination of good cheer and a broom he had taken from the hardware section. Those few who were subjected to him seemed in good humour though, and overall the atmosphere of the store was a pleasant one. Perhaps even more so than that morning the store felt like a home, in spite - or perhaps because of - the slight state of disarray the place had been left in by the swarm of customers.
The employees slowly left their posts, crossing the floor to mingle with one another, or simply to stretched their legs after a long day of sitting and standing behind a counter. Some took to cleaning their departments, pitching in with their friends’ efforts so they could all be off sooner. Others made for the lounge, weaving tales of what had transpired throughout the day. Others still simply left, their friends and passions laying out in the crispness of the night.
Blues sat alone at his counter, silently counting the last bits in the register. He scooped them off the table into the changebox, marking the total down with a slow-moving hoof. There was a weariness in his back, the warm stiffness one feels after a hard day’s work. He stretched, yawning broadly. Out of the corner of his eye, a hint of orange came into view, moving closer. It was Creme. Blues sighed.
"Hey," Creme said softly as he trotted up to the counter. Blues nodded to him.
"Hey," he said in return. "How'd the day go?"
"Good enough, I think," the stallion responded. He leaned against the counter, revealing a folded sheet of paper in his hooves, no doubt his total for the day. "We just have to hand in our sales list?"
"Well, we should take stock first, yeah..." Blues responded. He paused then, blinking. "I'm sorry, sales list? You mean your earnings?"
"Well, those too," the heavy orange pony replied. "But I also marked down what I'd sold during the day - items. Basically took stock while I was doing the job. Should I, uh, be just plain taking stock instead?"
Blues considered this. "I, uh... don't know, actually," he said. "I've never done it like that... but it might work. You sure you got everything?"
"Pretty sure," Creme said, unfolding the paper. His eyes scanned it for a while, his lips moving silently. "The numbers all add up, at least. So I'm pretty sure it's all right."
"Well, alright," Blues said. He smiled wryly. "Anything to get us out of here a bit faster, right?"
"Right," Creme said, re-folding his list. He tucked it into his apron, folding his hooves over the desk. "So, you wanna drop them off and grab some coffee?"
Blues stopped. His ears twitched, the sound of the words playing inside them, tickling them strangely. His stomach seemed to be doing tricks. "Uh..." he said slowly, careful not to look directly at the stallion. "I uh... think we're out of coffee. The stuff here is pretty lousy anyhow."
"Actually," Creme said, coughing a bit, "I wasn't thinking of getting coffee here. I was actually thinking of a place I saw just a bit down the street from here. I think they'd still be open."
Blues rolled his shoulders uncomfortably. His mind raced, looking for an excuse, any excuse, for why he couldn't go. Truth told he didn't want to turn Creme down. He wanted to accept the offer, to have coffee with him. Or hot chocolate, maybe, sipping from steaming mugs and chasing away the chill. Staring at each other over the table, smiling happily as snowflakes fell.
He shook his head, banishing the thought. "I should get home," he said hurriedly.
"I thought you didn't like spending time in your apartment?" Creme asked.
"I have to feed my cat," Blues said sharply. "Besides, rent is due. Don't wanna miss my landlady."
"On a Monday a week into the month?"
"My landlady is weird," the colt snapped. "Why do you care?"
Creme took a step back, his head dipping gently. "I'm sorry," he said. "I was just curious. I'll... let you get home, I guess." He took a slow step back, turning away. His tail hung limp between his legs, and his head had still not risen up again. Blues sighed.
"I'm sorry, Creme," he said. "I'm just... look, I told Mr. Tannenbaum that I wasn't good with ponies, but he insisted. I'm just... not feeling it tonight."
Creme turned back, a hopeful smile on his face. "Not today," he repeated, "but... maybe another day?"
"Tomorrow?" Blues said, before he had time to think. Creme's smile widened, and his head lifted again.
"Sure!" he said eagerly. "Tomorrow sounds good!" He grinned, trotting away from a dumbstruck Blues. The colt sat behind the counter, wondering for a moment if he should first slap his hoof over his mouth, or over his forehead.
"Tomorrow," he whispered. "Oh, nuts..."
***
Tomorrow... tomorrow...
The word echoed through Blues mind, sounding over and over and over, repeated in a maddening, endless loop. He shook his head, trying to chase it out, but to no avail. Nothing chased it away; not the sound of the whipping winds, nor the rumble of carriages, nor the soft popping of the lamplight fires that lined the street. He pulled his coat tighter around him, more out of habit than truly to banish the cold.
In truth, Blues liked the cold air of Canterlot. It bit and stung, yes, but if one could bear the chill there was something softly numbing about it. There was a wholeness to the cold, sweeping over everything else. Out in the cold, nothing could pierce through. In the cold and the dark, nothing mattered but the bite on one's flesh and the soft feeling of paranoia. Well... almost nothing.
Tomorrow... tomorrow...
Blues blew steam, cursing himself internally for the word. Part of him hated it, not for today but for what seemed like a thousand other things. It felt like he had always been cursing the word, honestly, like the word had been his nemesis from birth. More than once he had told himself it was a silly thought, the kind of lyrics he wrote when he was fourteen and languishing in unwarranted self-pity. There it was, though: the hatred of the word tomorrow.
He fumbled through his pocket, producing a tiny key. He jammed it into the lock of his worn and battered door with no small degree of reluctance, letting the ancient wood swing open. He stepped in, leaving the cold behind him and kicking the door shut.
"Tomorrow," He grumbled, yanking off his coat and tossing it over the back of the nearby kitchen chair. He paused for a while before picking up the coat again, wadding it into as tight a ball as he could manage, and pitching it across the room.
"Tomorrow!" he shouted, stalking through his tiny kitchen and into the tiny living room. He flopped down onto his sofa, sighing.
"Brown mane," he moaned, draping a foreleg over his eyes, "light orange fur. Gods... he's multiplying. Or following me. I'm not sure which is worse. Couldn't he have been like... green, or something? I like green. Green is a nice colour." He rolled onto his side, staring at the back of the sofa. He wasn't angry anymore, if he ever really had been. In fact, he felt very little of anything, save for an all-too-familiar tiredness. A battle too long fought, a war too long waged. He moaned, curling up.
"Why won't he leave me alone?" he asked nopony in particular. "It's been a year... why won't he just go away? Why is he allowed to move on?"
"Mow?"
Blues rolled over again, looking to the source of the sound. At the foot of the sofa was a small striped cat. Blues smiled faintly, reaching out to scratch the cat's head.
"Hey, Pluck," he said. "Don't worry about me. I'm just.. you know. Moping like usual."
"Mow," Pluck said in response, licking at Blues' hoof. The colt laughed, rolling over onto his back. Pluck jumped up, curling into a tiny ball on Blues' chest. He began to purr softly as the colt stroked him, sighing.
"What do you think, Pluck?" he asked. "Should I go through with it? I could... probably come up with something, get out of it somehow. Hell," he said, chuckling humourlessly, "I could probably call in sick tomorrow... spend the whole day in bed with you, huh? Or play a little? I haven't had much practice lately, have I?" He smiled. "I bet you miss me playing, huh Pluck?" The cat simply yawned, snuggling into his chest. He sighed.
"Course... Creme'd probably want to follow up on another day or something... he seems like the type. Or... maybe not, I dunno." He sighed, letting his head fall back. "You know Pluck, I don't even know if he's gay or not. I could be thinking about this all wrong. Maybe... maybe he just wants to make a friend?"
Pluck grumbled quietly. Whether he was annoyed by his owners chattering or it was simply a matter of a cat being a cat was unknown, but Blues seemed to take some message from it.
"Yeah," he said, "I know. I'm being stupid. But... I dunno. It's his mane, you know? Or... not just his mane, but everything. Creme just looks so much like him... and I have such a hard time forgetting about him anyways..."
Now there was an understatement, if ever an understatement existed. That hard time was more akin to an impossibility. The memory lingered everywhere in the apartment. That table, where a pot of flowers he had given Blues once sat. That bookshelf, he had put together for Blues' birthday the first year they were together. The plates they had shared meals from, the laundry they had done together. Even the sofa and which Blues now lay, where they had made love for the very first time. The scent of him hung over the whole apartment, a desperate stink, painfully nostalgic. Terribly vivid memories, scenes repeating themselves over and over in the ghostly realms of the past. The yesterday, almost as painful as tomorrow.
Blues sighed, wrapping his forelegs around Pluck, holding him close. The cat stretched, splaying himself out across the colt's blue belly and snuggling in. Blues stroked the cat's back. "He... couldn't be gay, right? Not someone like him. And even if he is... someone like him would never be after me, right?" He rolled his head to the side. "Or at least... he'd never stick around..." He sighed. His mind began to drift away again, to thoughts of Ponyville in the years past, and to long-gone lovers, only for his mind to be brought sharply back to Equestria as he felt Pluck's claws enter his chest.
"Owowoowowow! Alright, alright, you've made your point!" He winced sharply as the cat pulled his claws out, retracted them with a terribly satisfied grin. Blues stuck out his tongue, chuckling a bit. "Alright," he said, "So no moping. Fine. But... I still don't know if I should go, or not. I mean..."
Pluck reached out, claws bared menacingly. Blues rolled his eyes.
"Fine," he said. "I'll go. I guess... a cup of coffee won't kill me, right?" He sighed, smiling wistfully. Outside, the wind blew fiercely.
***
Wintertime had come to Canterlot in the night, a thick sheet of snow covering the streets and sidewalks and painting the world a brilliant white. Colts and fillies frolicked in the snow banks while parents citywide reminded them to wear their scarves and their toques, and early commuters grumbled and groaned at the piles of snow they now had to slog through,
Still, despite some mild nuisances one could not deny that the spirit of Hearth's Warming had struck the city just as the snow had. There was an amiable cheer to the air, hanging like a mist. Ponies bid season's greeting to one another as they passed in the streets, smiling merrily at their own plans and pleasant memories. Even the malls and markets, forever the last refuge of cynicism in the season, seemed to be at least a little bit more cheerful.
True, mares and stallions still clamoured over one another at the staff, and true, confused parents were still desperately trying to decipher what exactly was the difference between the Evergreen Ranger and Deciduous Ranger toys, but one could not deny the certain feel of levity to it all. Things would not get truly hectic for another week. For now, everypony was happy to simply be, well, happy.
Even Blues, normally so ambivalent during the working hours, wore a faint smile. Stranger still, he couldn't deny that the smile was genuine. He had slept well last night, with calm dreams of gentle snowfall and soft lamplight. Every so often, as it had the day before, his gaze would drift away from his tasks to 'check up on' his trainee.
Creme was doing well, as he had the day before. Once more he seemed to get on particularly well with the children, chatting amiably with the little colts and fillies, dwarfed as they were next to his bulk. It was almost a comical sight to see the massive stallion at the beck and call of the little filly of the hour, directing him to this or that toy she wanted from the top shelf.
Even on the occasions Creme's eyes met Blues', he didn't find himself turning away. To say he didn't feel a tad ill each time it happened would not be wholly true, but nevertheless it was a great improvement on the day before. Blues smiled a bit wider at the thought of it.
Slowly but surely the day waned, the ponies once more filtering away in a slow trickle, and the store closing its door for the evening. Once more Blues found himself alone at his register, going through a list of items he had sold that day, and counting the last of the money in the register. Out of the corner of his eye he saw a hint of brown, a slowly moving blob of pale orange.
"Hey," Creme said, setting down in front of the register. "How's it going? Didn't talk to you this morning."
"Yeah," Blues said. His voice was quiet, vaguely unsure. He gave a small half-smile to the stallion, who smiled back.
Creme leaned on the counter, gesturing to the paper in the colt's hooves. "You doing the item counting now?" he asked. Blues chuckled.
"Yeah, it um, seemed to work for you. So, I figured I'd give it a shot. Might help me get out of here faster, right?"
"Right," Creme said, smiling. "I checked the hours on that place, though. It's open for a while still."
"You mean the coffee place?" Blues asked, his voice fading further. It was not that he was unsure; he had decided the previous night that he would attend the alleged date, and he didn't intend to renege on his promise. Even so, there was a lingering worry in the pit of his stomach. He couldn't help but think back, to dwell, as much as he tried not to.
"Yeah," Creme said. "You still wanna go? We can just drop off our stuff to Uncle Tannenbaum, and then head out if you like."
"Yeah," Blues said, doing his best to banish, or at least suppress, the worrisome thoughts. "Yeah, that sounds good. I could do with a warm drink, heh."
Creme smiled, dropping down from the counter. "Great," he said happily. "Let's head out - I could use a nice coffee myself." He smirked, almost too faintly for it to even register. "I tried the stuff in the lounge this morning... you were kinda right about it being bad. I've had a lot better, at least."
Blues grinned as he cantered around the counter. "Heh, maybe we should be getting Mr. Tannenbaum to make it, from now on. His stuff yesterday was pretty good."
"He made you coffee yesterday?" Creme asked as they both trotted out of the music section. At least, Blues trotted. Creme's gait was more akin to a plod, a good-natured slowness that long-legged types tend to adopt so shorter souls might keep up with their strides. Blues began to notice that his head bobbed as they walked, dipping up and down like a workhorse pulling a plough. The colt found himself wondering if Creme had ever worked on a farm - certainly, it would explain his not-inconsiderable bulk. "I guess you really are his favourite employee," the stallion continued.
Blues tucked his ears back, lowering his head a bit. "I... wouldn't really say that," he said. "He was honestly just trying to butter me up, I think. So that I would agree to train you."
"You needed buttering up to train me?"
Blues shrugged. "I'm... not good with ponies. Or personal relationships. Course... it might have been more by way of apology for knocking me into a stand of stuffed animals."
Creme laughed, once more that deep, soft booming. "A stand of stuffed animals? Now there's a story I'd like the hear." Blues grinned sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck.
He wove the tale, albeit with some minor adjustment to make it less embarrassing on his part, as they trotted to Mr. Tannenbaum's office to drop off their sheets for the day. Strangely, Blues didn't actually feel all that embarrassed by the story once he had begun to tell it. Something about Creme's patient listening, perhaps. Or, perhaps he was simply glad to be able to tell a story again after so long. He had begun to realize he had missed it. He had missed talking with other ponies, and laughing with other ponies. Things seemed to move so much faster. Before he realized it, in fact, he was greeted with a rush of cold wind to the face as the pair trotted out the door and into the evening.
Blues shook his head slightly, his ears twitching at the sudden cold. He barely even remembered putting on his coat and scarf, but here they were, out in the dim evening light. There was a chill in the air, but not a biting one. It was faintly damp, settling into a pony's shoulders and sticking around for the hours to come, but not so obtrusive as to send one running indoors. No, the night was cool, and calm. In spite of the damp, no snow fell, a fact that Blues found himself just a bit disappointed in.
"So, what happened then?" Creme asked, tearing the colt away from his thoughts on the weather.
"Huh?" Blue asked, looking up at the stallion. "Oh, uh. Well... I was so taken aback that I kinda jumped back, and landed on a display of stuffed toys. Before I knew what was happening, I was buried under a pile of animals. For a second, aheh, I thought I was under attack or something."
Creme chuckled. "So what you're saying," he said, "is that Uncle Tannenbaum didn't so much knock you into the pile so much as he scared you into it?"
"Well, when you say it like that," Blues said, flushing a little. He smiled though, flicking his ears. "I guess it's not such a good story. Still, I think I can be fair in blaming him for me winding up there."
"Maybe," Creme said. "But I doubt you can blame Uncle Tannenbaum for you singing in the store first thing in the morning. "
"Yeah, well," Blues said, poking his tongue out at the stallion. He chuckled again. "But, uh, I don't think you need to call Mr. Tannenbaum ‘Uncle’ when we're outside of the store, though. It's just for the foals, you know? I think he wants to make himself out to be some kinda Hearth’s Warming figure."
"Actually, Uncle Tannenbaum is a Hearth’s Warming figure where we come from," Creme said. "Or where he comes from. I was born here, but Uncle Tannenbaum came over with my Dad."
"What, really?" Blues asked, laughing. "That's kind of a funny name to give your foal, then."
"Eh," Creme replied, shrugging. "He was born pretty close to Hearth's Warming, so I guess it made sense. Plus, he's always shown up on Hearth's Warming eve since I was a foal, so the association always made sense to me. It was like he really was Uncle Tannenbaum, honestly."
Blues chuckled. "So what, you've known him for awhile? He's a family friend or something?"
"Oh, no," Creme said, shaking his head. "He's my actual Uncle. My Dad's little brother."
Blues blinked. "Oh, huh. So you’re Mr. Tannenbaum's nephew?"
"That's... how it tends to work, yeah," Creme said with a smile.
The colt shrugged. "Well... good to know nepotism is still alive and well, I guess." He paused for a while, before wincing violently. "No - crap," he said. "I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking. I didn't mean it like, I don't think you're good enough to get the job honestly, I was just... um..." He slapped his hoof against his forehead, sighing. "Being stupid, apparently."
Creme laughed, twitching his ears. "Don't worry about it. Truth is, while the timing is convenient I'd be lying if I said my being his nephew didn't have any say in the matter. We're here, by the way."
Blues blinked, not that he was distressed by the change of subject. "What, right here?" He looked back over his shoulder. The department store was barely a block away.
"I said it was close, didn't I?" Creme asked.
"Yeah.... but, well, I would think I'd have seen a place that was this close..." He turned back to the store, appraising it silently.
It was a small place, tucked away between two much larger storefronts. Indeed, the only thing that marked it out at all was a tiny sign, and a small table in a window. Blues peered in through that window, spotting a portly little old mare sitting behind a counter. "How did you even spot this place?" Blues asked. "It's barely even here."
Creme chuckled. "I was looking," he said. "Besides... I've gotten used to spotting small things."
Blues looked up at him, a faint smile playing across his lips. "I... guess you would, wouldn't you?" he said. He was getting more effective at putting the brakes on certain trains of thought. Creme merely shrugged, chuckling.
"Want to head in?" he asked. "Or would you prefer to stay out in the cold for a bit longer?"
"Mm, I think we should head in," Blues replied.
Just as the cold had been, the warmth of the little shop was like a wall, accompanied by the soft sound of Hearth's Warming songs playing from a record player on the countertop. A tiny bell tingled over their heads as the door swung open and shut, alerting the little mare behind the counter. She beamed out at them, clapping her hooves together. Blues and Creme, it seemed, were her only customers at the moment.
She beckoned them up to the counter, folding her hooves happily. "Good evening, colts. How are you, hm?"
"We're just fine, ma'am," Creme replied, dipping his head slightly. "Or at least, I am - I can't speak for my friend - he's apparently a bit jumpy."
Blues grumbled a good-natured grumble, nodding to the mare. "I'm fine as well, miss."
"Wonderful to hear," she said. "What can I do for you, hm? Nice coffee, maybe a dessert?" She move aside, gesturing to the menu behind her, written out in chalk on a dusty old blackboard. Blues was a bit surprised by the sheer amount of items, almost too surprised to know where to begin with it.
"I, um," he said. "Wow. Do you just have... plain old coffee?" He smiled shyly. "I'm not quite what you'd call a connoisseur..."
The mare smiled, nodding. "Of course. Sugar? Cream?"
"Um, a bit of cream, please," Blues replied. "No sugar, thank you." the mare nodded again.
"And you, dear?" she asked Creme. the stallion had been staring at the menu silently, his eyes flicking about.
"I think," he said, his voice becoming soft again, in a contemplative sort of way, "that I'd like to try the caramel tea. With, ah, cream and two sugars, please."
"Are you sure about that sugar?" the mare asked. "Caramel tea is already a bit sweet."
Creme smiled, looking more than just a bit embarrassed. His head dipped even further, and he nodded. "Um, yes Ma'am," he said. "I'm sure."
"Bit of a sweet tooth, hm?" the mare asked, smiling knowingly. Creme didn't respond, save for to nod. the mare laughed, throwing her head back. "Well, don't you worry. If I'd had a bit for every lump of sugar my colts put in their tea, why I'd be a rich mare by the time they were three! Why don't you colts go have a seat in the window? I'll have your drinks in just a moment."
Blues nodded thankfully, following behind Creme as they went to take a seat. the oversized Stallion had to squirm a little bit to fit between the window and the table, eliciting a small chuckle from Blues, who politely pulled the table towards himself. Creme smiled, and leaned back into his chair.
"So," Blues said, folding his hooves on the table. "You have a sweet tooth?"
The stallion’s head dipped again, and he smiled bashfully. “Sweet… teeth is more like it,” he said, chuckling. “Bit of a family curse, I guess. I inherited it from Uncle Tannenbaum. He would always give me sweets when he came to visit.” The stallion’s eyes seemed to become warm, glazing over faintly as he recalled his foalhood. “He always loved to play up the Hearth’s Warming figure image, and all.”
“And here I was thinking it had to do with your name,” Blues said. He found himself smiling as well. He was vaguely aware of something that seemed to be missing, but he couldn’t bring himself to think of what it was. His eyes scanned the stallion’s face, taking in every detail. The sharpness of his muzzle, the way his nose twitched and his eyes shrank when he smiled. “Creme Brulee is a dessert, right?”
Creme rolled his eyes. “Yeah,” he said. “It’s, aheh… traditionally eaten on Hearth’s Warming eve where my family comes from. My mum says they named me that because my coat is the same colour as it, but I honestly think that they might have been pushing for a theme with my uncle. It’s… kind of embarrassing, honestly.”
Blues chuckled. “I dunno,” he said. “You seem to like your uncle a lot, so I think it’s nice.” He smirked a bit. “Or maybe I should say it’s sweet.” Creme laughed, rolling his eyes.
“There’s a new one,” he said, a hint of sarcasm in his voice. He leaned back in his chair, rubbing his muzzle. “I’ll have to come up with a Blues joke now, you know.”
The colt laughed, perhaps a bit too eagerly. He rubbed his shoulders, his eyes flicking back and forth as he tried to find a way to turn the conversation away from the inevitable comparison to his demeanor. Fortunately for him, the old mare arrived with their drinks. She set them down on the table gently, giving both ponies a bright, eager smile.
“There you are, dears,” she said, “Can I get anything else for you?”
“Um, no thank you,” Blues said. He was simply happy for the distraction, however brief. Creme shook his head as well, and the mare nodded.
“Well, if you change your mind, you know where to find me,” she said, turning away. Blues sipped gratefully at his coffee, letting the warmth of the drink and the peace of the sudden quiet calm his nerves.
“Actually,” he said suddenly, a thought flashing into his mind, “you’re not from Equestria, right? And you mentioned that Uncle Tannenbaum is a Hearth’s Warming figure in your country… but Hearth’s Warming is an Equestrian holiday. What’s up with that?”
Creme chuckled, wrapping his hooves around the delicate teacup. “Well, I’m Equestrian,” he said. “I was born here, but my parents weren’t. They moved from Furheim in the Northeast.” He sipped from his cup, humming happily at the taste, and leaned back.
"Well," he said, his voice taking on an orator's quality about it, repeating from memory a story he had known from birth, perhaps even before. "See, the future Equestrians weren't the only ponies affected by the Great Winter. Lots of ponies went elsewhere. They dodged the Windigoes, or in some cases adapted, but they didn't really get the benefit of the Hearth's Warming. So things just went on as they had been before.
"Except, that all changed when Uncle Tannenbaum came along. See, Tannenbaum was an Equestrian. A scholar. After the Hearth's Warming, he became fascinated by it. He absorbed everything there was to know about it, however little that was.
"Eventually, he took to traveling. Lots of ponies came with the three leaders to what would become Equestria, but not all of them knew about the Hearth's Warming, so he told them. Of course back then, countries didn't really exist yet, not like we know them today, so he didn't stop at the borders. He just kept traveling, telling the story to whichever ponies he came across.
"The story is different in every country, since something different happened in each place. But in Furheim, they say that he came from the Frozen Norths. It was winter when he arrived... Furheim gets cold in the winters. Deathly cold. In those days, they thought it was the Great Winter returning to them, hunting them down. They still hated one another, they just happened to tolerate the other tribes. They stayed apart, never bothering to support one another. They were always on the lookout for more travelers from their tribes, though.
“When Uncle Tannenbaum arrived, he was wrapped up in an enormous cloak, too big to tell what tribe he was. So when he arrived, the representatives from each tribe went to him, and asked him what race he was. He refused to answer, though. He said he needed to get warm first. Of course, nopony wanted to risk bringing in a member of another tribe, so they brought him to a meeting hall, expecting him to take off his cloak. Instead though, he started to tell them the story of The Hearth’s Warming. Well, all the ponies thought he was bonkers, but none of them wanted to turn him away. So they sat and listened while he told his story."
Blues found himself leaning in, listening intently to the stallion's story. "And... what happened?" he asked. Creme smiled, taking another sip of tea.
"Nopony believed him at first. Not for a long time. But winter was upon them, so they couldn’t turn him away, and he wouldn’t take off his cloak. He refused to take it off for the entire winter in the hall, and he told the story every time he could. Eventually, the ponies started to realize something: they were all warm. Much warmer sitting together then they would have been alone. They started to talk, and they realized they weren't quite as different as they had thought. By the time spring rolled around, the three were downright inseparable. Every year since then, Furheim has celebrated the Hearth's Warming. They just do it a bit differently than we do in Equestria."
Blues sat back, rather at a loss for words. "Wow," he attempted, but found nothing else came after it. Creme simply chuckled, sipping at his tea and looking out the window. He fell quiet, perhaps exhausted by the effort of stringing together more than two sentences, leaving Blues to his thoughts.
Hearth's Warming carols drifted through the air, but they seemed somehow paltry compared to what had come before. Blues had always loved carols. He loved all music, of course, but there was something special about them. They could be cheerful and happy, or dour and melancholy, or simply the tiniest bit hopeful, but one could always tell a Hearth's Warming song. There was a quality about them. Association, he supposed, but even so. He sighed, sipping at his tea and basking in the vaguely blue afterglow of the story.
The silence continued as Blues sipped at his coffee. His ears twitched, and he shifted in his chair. He was beginning to grow uncomfortable. Not that the silence made him uncomfortable. No, he was alright with silence. It was more a strange tickling in the back of his mind. A tiny nagging thought, as he watched Creme stare out the window. The stallion's eyes were a thousand miles away, thinking of something much different from where he was. That alone, perhaps, was what made Blues uncomfortable. He tried to turn his mind away, not think of it. In spite of everything else, he was happy. It had been so long since he had done this. He was determined to enjoy it. He leaned back, listening to the carols gently sway through the air. The sound of a drum rum-pum-pum-pumming met his ears, slowly fading away. He smiled faintly, naming the carol in his head and twitching his ears to the tune. There was a soft hissing, the sound of a record stopping, and the click of a needle swinging away. Blues peered over as the old mare took the record off, replacing it with another from the below the counter. Blues settled in, sipping at his coffee as it began to spin, and almost choked as the song reached his ears.
Last Hearth's Warming, I gave you my heart,
But the very next day you gave it away,
This year, to save me from tears,
I'll give it to someone special...
Blues' ears snapped back against his head, trying fruitlessly to block out the song. All at once it came upon him. He remembered what had been missing all too well: The anxiety, the loneliness, and the anger. He rubbed his shoulders, as though trying to warm himself from some unseen chill, lowering his head. His stomach was doing flips.
"Miss?" Blues called out. the mare looked over, her ears perking up.
"Yes, dear?" She asked. Blues rubbed his neck.
"I'm... sorry, Miss," he said, "But could I ask you to skip this song?"
The mare stared at him for a while, lifting an eyebrow in a look of confusion that Blues could make out clear from across the room. Still, she complied, moving the needle deeper into the record and starting on the next song. Blues relaxed slightly, but sighed. The mood was already gone, much to his dismay. He was back to his usual mopey self. He sighed, looking up, and spotted Creme's rather pointedly confused expression.
"What was that about?" the stallion asked. "You don't like the song?"
"I... don't want to talk about it," Blues said, looking away. His stomach had calmed some, but he still felt bile in the pit of his gut. He sighed heavily, as though trying to expel the feeling, but to no avail. "I don't really like it, no."
"How come?" Creme asked. "I... actually always liked that one, myself. It's... I dunno, appropriate."
It's personal, Blues thought, almost bitterly. A thousand words ran through his mind. A thousand different lies, even a few truths. True to form, the worst ones decided to come out. "It's pathetic," he said. "A loser still hung up on his ex a year later? What's so appropriate about that?"
Creme blinked, running his hoof in circles along the table. "Well..." he said softly. "He gets over it, doesn't he? I mean, he gives his heart to someone special the next year. Learns his lesson, moves on, finds love. He has a happy ending. Isn't that Hearth's Warming enough?"
Blues snorted. No small part of him wanted to agree with Creme. It wanted to agree with Creme a lot, but he couldn't. Of all the words he could say, "You're right" just weren't among them, no matter how much he wanted them to be. "I dunno," he said. "It just seems... silly. Like he should have gotten over it a long time ago."
Creme didn't say anything. He simply sipped at his tea, staring out the window again. His eyes barely moved, his face impassive.
He smiled faintly, then. It wasn't a happy smile, though; in fact, it was a little bit sad. He sighed, folding his hooves in front of his face. "Blues," he said slowly, "You... don't like me much, do you?"
Whether the sick feeling in Blues' gut had gotten worse or whether it had been replaced by something else, he couldn't say. All he knew is that the question struck him like a slap to the face. He blinked, staring at the stallion.
"It's just," Creme continued, "whenever I talk to you it seems like you're looking for an excuse to get away from me. Like you get angry as soon as I open my mouth. I know I've been kinda pushy, but... Well, I just figured that you moved here a little while ago too. I figured maybe we could be friends. But... if you don't like me, then I shouldn't push. And... I apologize." He stared down at his tea, sighing.
Blues groaned, letting his head fall into his hooves. He swore at himself internally. "Creme, it's not that," he said. He tried to focus, tried to find his words, but to his surprise they came unbidden. "I'm... I told you, I'm bad with ponies. I've got... issues." In spite of the tone of the conversation, he couldn't help but laugh at the truth of his words. Issues is probably an understatement, he thought to himself.
"I'm sorry," he said, shaking his head. "I honestly am. I just get... nervous around ponies." Especially big, attractive stallions...
"So," Creme said slowly. "You're saying you don't dislike me, then."
"Not at all," Blues said, shaking his head. "Like I said, I... you make me nervous, but..."
"I scare you," Creme cut in. Blues slapped his forehead.
"No," he said, "that isn't what I meant at all! I mean I, it's not just you, it's..." He peeked through his hooves, his brow furrowing. Creme was smiling, a faintly impish grin. He chuckled, draining the last of his tea.
"That was a joke, Blues," he said. He scratched his chin, sighing a bit. "Still... I'm sorry I've been so pushy about it. I should'a guessed I was making you nervous. But I mean, another pony from Ponyville here in the city..."
"Wait, you're from Ponyville?" Blues asked. His eyes narrowed. "How did you know I was from Ponyville?"
The stallion blushed, coughing. "I'd... seen you around town," he said. "Playing your guitar. Sometimes I'd... stop to listen. My uncle told me he was getting someone from Ponyville to train me, and so I kinda... recognized you right off." He coughed again, and Blues rubbed his forehead.
"Have we... met?" he asked.
"Uh, no," Creme shook his head. "Just crossed paths. I'm not surprised you didn't notice me. I usually kept to myself. But I figured new city, new life, maybe I ought to make a friend, you know? Or at least, make more of an effort, heh."
Blues frowned, still racking his brain. Suddenly, it struck him. "Wait... I do remember you!" he said suddenly, clapping his hooves. "I've seen you around town... Pulling carts." He frowned again. "Um, not sure of what, though..."
"Anything, really," Creme said, laughing. "But you did see me around? Ponies tell me I usually just blend in."
Blues chuckled a bit. "Well... I did have to think awfully hard to remember you..."
"Better than most ponies do," the stallion replied. His calm demeanor had returned, content, apparently, in the knowledge he was neither hated nor forgotten. He chuckled silently to himself, playing with his empty teacup.
Blues watched him silently. His stomach still felt funny, and his shoulders still felt cold, but they were getting warmer. He felt guilty to being so harsh with the stallion, though. Creme had been friendly with him, had managed to pull him out of his shell, and to make him happy for a while - really, genuinely happy. That was something that nopony could have claimed for a long while. He sighed.
"Hey, Creme?" he asked. The stallion looked up, and Blues rubbed the back of his neck. A faint flush crept into his cheeks, bringing a long-lost warmth with it. "I..." he murmured. "I'm glad you invited me out, tonight," he said. "I'm enjoying this."
"Yeah?" Creme asked, smiling.
Blues smiled back. "Yeah," he said. "Except... well, I kinda wish I hadn't snapped at you like that. I kinda wish I could do something to make it up to you." He peered up, wondering if Creme had managed to pick up the hint. From the glint in the stallion's eye he imagined that was the case.
"Well," Creme said, "Maybe we could... do this again? I, uh... well, I needed to do some Hearth's Warming shopping myself, but I don't know where to go..."
"We get an employee discount, you know," Blues pointed out. He chuckled. "But I guess buying all your gifts from the place where you work is kinda tacky, huh?"
"Yeah, sort of what I figured," Creme said. "Besides, I'd sort of like for Uncle Tannenbaum to not be able to name the price of his gift off by heart." He chuckled, rubbing his nose. "But anyways, I was thinking... you probably know the lay of the land better than me, so maybe... we could get together this weekend, do some shopping?"
"Sure," Blues said. "I... have some to do myself yet, heh." He pointedly refrained from mentioning that one of those gifts left to get was for his cat, and instead drained the rest of his coffee.
"And, uh," Creme continued. Blues raised his eyebrows questioningly from behind his mug. Creme coughed shyly, continuing. "I was thinking, after we're done... if you don't have any other plans we could... get dinner? Maybe bum around the city for a while, see if there's anything interesting going on?"
Blues' heart jumped into his throat. It pounded very suddenly, his face getting hot. He held the cup higher up, covering his blush - to say nothing of his enormous grin. "Do..." He asked, swallowing. "D-do you mean like... a..." He grappled with the final word, trying to force it out. Creme seemed to understand, though, hearing the word long before it was said.
"If you're not... interested," he said quickly, "It doesn't have to be. Or we can not. I don't mean to be pushy, and I know it's rude to assume, but I thought... you know." He grinned sheepishly, a hint of blush on his cheeks. "It was worth a shot? But yeah, I sort of meant as a -"
"I'd love to," Blues said quickly, almost surprising himself with the words. He blinked, but smiled. "I'd love to," he said again, more slowly this time. "Dinner sounds nice. And... hanging around. I hear that the Upper Quarter is beautiful near Hearth's Warming. We could look at the decorations?"
"Yeah," Creme said. "That sounds nice. So... it's a date?"
"It's a date," Blues agreed, nodding.
And so it was. the pair chatted for a time, but soon the night grew long. Both had homes to get to, warm beds to fill now that their bellies had been warmed. They payed the mare, who waved goodbye to them as they trotted out the door and into the night. The air was cold, but refreshingly so. They bid farewell to one another, turning down their respective paths.
Blues smiled into the night. Yes, he was anxious. The coffee was sitting hard and heavy in his belly, but his heart was warm, fluttering softly in his chest. For the first time in what felt like far too long, he was excited.
***
He was terrified.
The week had passed without much incident. Day by day the crowds in the store got a bit bigger, but it was never unmanageable. In fact, after a while the hustle and bustle of the shoppers began to put a smile on Blues' face. Oh, the odd irate customer was a tad annoying, yes, but amidst the swarm of "Happy Hearth's Warming"s, it seemed a meager nuisance. Indeed, compared to everything else he hardly noticed.
Day by day the store grew a bit more haggard, evidence of the activities held within. Mr. Tannenbaum and all his merry employees did their best to keep it tidy, but there was only so much time in the day - or the night, for that matter. The old stallion seemed understanding, even eager, that the workers leave before it was done, though. To each cited shopping trip or visit with family he would merely chortle happily, giving the pony in question a pat on the back and a hoof out the door. Every time, too, his nephew was right there with him, smiling calmly and silently off to the side.
Creme and Blues chatted often throughout the week, on lunch breaks and before and after work. Often it was merely a cheerful greeting as they passed one another by in the store, but every one of them warmed Blues heart. The big orange pony had a twinkle in his eye, a little brighter every time, as though he was planning something, and every time Blues' heart would patter just a bit faster. Excitement, for the most part. Now, however, the pattering was as far from excited as a pony could get.
Pluck was curled up on the foot of the futon, his tiny golden eyes following Blues back and forth, back and forth. The colt chewed at his lip, pausing occasionally to tap his hooves nervously.
Even he was not fully sure what he felt, precisely. There was fear, yes, a deep anxiety, the lurching feeling of butterflies in his stomach. It was tempered with something else, though. Excitement? Perhaps. Dread? Maybe. Affection?
Affection? Yes, perhaps it was affection. It certainly calmed his nerves some to imagine finally meeting up with Creme, though perhaps that was simply for the sake of getting it over and done with. Finally taking the plunge, jumping headfirst into the waters as it were.
Pluck yawned widely, stretching out and plucking at the bed with his claws. Blues halted his pacing, trotting over to the bed and prodding at the cat's claws.
"Oh, stop that," he said. "I've got enough on my mind without thinking about getting a new mattress, thank you."
Pluck meowed loudly, his ears flicking back. He tucked his paws beneath himself, flicking his tail sourly. Blues sighed, crawling up onto the bed beside him.
"Yeah, yeah," he said. "I know I'm being silly and snippy. I'm just... nervous." he rubbed his hooves together, staring across the room at his closet. "Is it stupid to say I want to make a good impression?" he asked, as much to the room as to the cat beside him, who merely began to clean himself ambivalently. Blues chuckled.
"Yes, that's exactly it," he said, rolling onto his back. "I just wanna look my best. You'd wanna look good for a nice molly cat, huh? And you'd do your best... whatever it is cats do when they want to be impressive." He sighed, folding his hooves across his chest. "I'm just... nervous."
Pluck stood up, stretching in a poor attempt at looking casual, and plodded over to cuddle into Blues’ side.
"I dunno, Pluck," Blues said, smiling and reaching down to scratch Pluck's head. "I don't think playing hard-to-get is gonna help me out.
"I'll probably be fine, honestly," he said. He frowned, letting the words float about the room. "I'll be fine," he said again, as though the reassure himself. He nodded slowly. "He... he asked me out, right? That means he likes me. It's not like he's gonna change his mind now... not unless I... do something really stupid."
Blues' eyes shifted back and forth suddenly, the anxiety bubbling up again. He flipped off his back, leaving behind a very displeased cat, and trotted over to the closet.
"I won't do anything dumb," he said, nodding sharply. "But, it won't hurt to have a bit of help, right?" He opened his closet, almost leaping into it in the rush he was in. Fortunately his wardrobe was a fairly small affair, so it took hardly any time at all to find what he was looking for: a wide-collared, deep-blue peacoat.
The coat had been his favourite for a long, long time. He stared at it for a while, wondering just why it was, exactly, that he he had put it away for so long, sitting unused in the back of his closet for so many months in favour of a dumpier old jacket he had picked up for a few bits at a surplus store.
There was the obvious answer, of course: the peacoat hadn't been designed for mountain climates. It was made of a thinner material, and would probably only just block the wind enough to Blues to refrain from freezing. He had put it away long before that, though. In fact, he remembered picking up his current jacket as soon as he'd gotten into Canterlot. He tilted his head, wondering why as he ran his hooves across the soft felt. He had so many memories of this coat...
There it was, then: the memories came flowing in, marching along like a parade of freaks and follies, exposing themselves for his mind's eye. Evenings spent bundled up in the coat, yes. Cuddled up close to another, a shared mug of cocoa. He remembered seeing the coat for the first time, a gift for his birthday, so late into the autumn. He remembered being told how well it went with his fur and his scarf...
His ears drifted back, his shoulders sagging just a little. He continued to run his hooves across it, but slower now, carefully, as though it would unravel if he pressed it too hard; as though the coat were something unreal. A dream, an illusion, a painting on glass.
"Oh," he said softly. "That's why."
He was silent then. There was no sound at all, save for the soft humming of his clock on the nightstand. Even Pluck was quiet, appreciating the moment. Eventually though, the cat got up and jumped down off the bed. He walked over to the quiet colt, rubbing firmly against his side and purring like a motorboat. Blues smiled faintly, looking down at the cat. Pluck reached out, patting the colt and stretching out his claws. He looked up at Blues, meowing loudly.
Blues chuckled, shaking his head. "No... no," he said. "No, I... it's about time I got over him, right? He doesn't get to decide what I wear... and it's not about the stuff. It's just... stuff." He smiled, still a bit sadly, and slipped the coat on. "If he thought that I looked good in this, Creme will too, right?"
Pluck meowed again, batting at the buttons of the coat. Blues laughed, picking him up and moving him away.
"That's right," he said. He got to his hooves, tucking the coat tightly around him. "To hell with him! Living well is the best revenge, and living well means looking good!" He grinned, feeling strangely genuine in it. the coat was every bit as soft and cozy as he remembered it being, and a quick glance in the mirror confirmed that he looked as good as ever - and with the quick addition of his scarf, even better. He chuckled, scratching Pluck's head again.
"Thanks, Pluck," he said. "I've gotta head out - don't wanna keep Creme waiting. You've got food in your bowl, and water in your dish. Don't wait up!" With that he was off, trotting out the door and down into the streets.
Like the traffic in the department store, the volume of snow had only increased as the week had worn on. Hardly a day had passed where the sky did not fog over and a flood of snowflakes did not descend from the sky. Over a few short days the landscape had been transformed from a majestic and imposing capital to something softer, more serene. the hard edges of the buildings disappeared under thick winter blankets, piling up in snowbanks that reached nearly over Blues head. the weather crews had even started to step in, for all the good it was doing. Even now a light snowfall drifted in the breeze, the tiny flakes dropping and melting on Blues' nose.
He smiled faintly, his eyes crossing for a moment to watch a flake disappear. He laughed, a puff of mist escaping his lips. He felt a strange sort of levity as he trotted through the streets, weaving in and out of the way of happy ponies. His coat was soft and just the tiniest bit chilly, the frosty mountain air cooling his skin. It was a good cool, though, a sort of freshness. He felt clean, and in a way almost new. He was barely aware of his anxiety. He hardly even remembered that he had ever been anxious.
Of course, he suddenly found himself glad of the cool as he was given a sharp reminder of his anxieties. He turned the corner to the little coffee shop by the department store where he had agreed to meet Creme, catching a glimpse of the stallion through the window. Creme was sitting at the table alone, sipping at a teacup. A thick woolen scarf was wrapped around his neck, a creamy off-white colour against his orange. He looked up, spotting blues and waving silently.
Blues watched through the window as Creme paid for his drink quickly, trotting outside. Blues’ heart fluttered in his chest, spreading a familiar warmth through him. He grinned, pawing at the ground as Creme approached.
"Heya," Blues said, flicking his ears.
Creme smiled warmly, wrapping his scarf a bit tighter around his neck. "Hey," he said softly. "How're you doing?"
"I'm doing alright," Blues said. He chuckled, almost at himself, and swished his tail eagerly. "Actually... really good." He grinned. "Really good," he repeated. "How about you?"
"Hm?" Creme said, as though surprised Blues would take an interest. "Oh, I'm good." He reached up, brushing his hoof along the thick scarf around his neck. "Got this in the mail just today... my mum heard it gets cold on the mountain, heh."
"It looks good," Blues said. Creme looked up at him, smiling a bit strangely.
"Thanks," he said. "Hey... your coat is new too, right? It looks really good on you."
Blues heart leaped in his chest, and he found himself having to focus on not doing a tiny victory dance at the compliment. "Oh... thanks," he said, trying - and likely failing - to sound calmer than he was. "It's not actually new, though. It's... a bit old actually. I just pulled it out of my closet."
"How come you didn't wear it before?" Creme asked, tilting his head. "It, uh..." He coughed. "It looks much nicer than your other one?"
"Oh, well..." Blues said, shrugging. Because it was the only way I'd have a snowball's chance on the sun of being nearly as attractive as you?
"It's a bit cooler than my other jacket," he said. "So I figured since I'd probably wind up carrying some bags, it might be a good idea to wear something thinner so I didn't overheat." He looked down at himself, a grin breaking across his face. "Plus I haven't worn it in a while, and it's kinda my favourite coat, and it does look nice, so I just thought it'd be nice to wear it again..." He looked up, only to find the burly stallion smiling strangely at him. His expression was warm, and not without a hint of amusement.
"Wow," Creme said. "You are in a good mood, aren't you? Managed to get you to string two whole sentences together."
Blues laughed, rubbing his foreleg. "You're one to talk," he said. He smiled a bit bashfully, though. His face flushed just a bit, and he smiled. "I've been looking forward to this," he said.
"Me too," Creme said. "It's gotten so busy around work..."
"Oh, yeah," Blues said, smirking. "Hardly any time for shopping, so this is nice." There was a brief pause Creme blinking silently at blues, before the colt raised a hoof awkwardly. "That was a joke?" he said.
"Oh!" Creme said, laughing suddenly. He gave a brief sigh of relief. "Sorry, just... "
"Yeah, I know," Blues said, rubbing his neck. "I guess I should have expected, with how I acted last time..." He took a small step closer to the stallion, smiling up at him. "I really am sorry about that, Creme. But I do want to be here with you, and I am looking forward to today. So... Think we can, I dunno..." He rubbed his foreleg. "Put the past behind us?"
Creme smiled wider, flicking his ears at Blues. "I think I can do that," he said. He turned faintly, lifting a hoof as though to give Blues a place by his side. "Shall we?" he asked.
Blues trotted up, happily settling into the theoretically offered place. "Uh-huh," he agreed.
They chatted idly as they walked, making their way higher up the mountain that Canterlot rested on to the Upper-Middle Quarter, where all the best shopping was located. As they walked, Blues found himself pointing out the odd sight - a particularly old building, or an interesting landmark. While not a path Blues walked frequently, it was one he had taken before, and he found a kind of cheer in sharing it with somepony.
"So, what's the story behind this?" Creme asked as they approached a particularly large structure. It was made up of three building across a large courtyard. Two of the buildings, on the side, were fairly simple - at least for the style of the day they had been built, meaning they sported the swooping arches and peaked domes the Canterlot Architects had been so fond of, but little else. The third building, however, was much more impressive. It, like its brethren, sported a domed roof on either side. These domes however were flat on top, serving as pedestals for two massive statues of ponies, apparently supporting the clock-tower that rose between them. The face of the clock looked out, brilliantly ornate and gleaming for all to see.
The buildings were connected by covered walkways, encircling the courtyard. Most of it was covered by snow banks, the thick sheets of white hiding the parks that existed here in the summer. The centre of the courtyard, however, was every bit the showcase that it was in the warmer months. It was sunken down, a wide walking bridge covering the gap, which was filled with tiny restaurants and tables, all scattered around the edges of an enormous skating rink.
Blues smiled, peering over at creme. The stallion, as Blues had been the first time he saw this place, stared in a soft sort of awe, a recognition of the beauty of the building.
"I'm not sure," Blues said. "A lot of the historical buildings in Canterlot have plaques saying what they used to be used for, but I've never seen one here if they have it. I'm not even sure that it is, honestly. Historical I mean." He chuckled. "I think they might have built it recently, but made it look old... either way, it's one of the biggest malls in Canterlot."
"One of?" Creme asked, his normally stoic expression broken for just a moment. "There are bigger ones?"
"In the Upper Quarter," Blues said, nodding. "But... I think the shops up there are a bit out of our price range." The two shared a chuckle. A breeze blew up then, causing Blues to shiver a bit, and Creme smiled.
"Well," he suggested, "I guess we'd better get started, huh? Probably only gonna get busier in there."
Blues nodded in response, grinning up at the stallion. They trotted quickly inside, momentarily stopped by the wall of warmth that rushed out of the building, and continued in.
The interior of the mall was every bit the equal of it's exterior, with tall arches that stretched up for three floors of shops.
While it was not truly packed, the building was far from empty. Blues found himself with another reason to be thankful for Creme's company as they plodded through the crowd. Ponies seemed to give the stallion a wide berth, presumably aware that even if they did not it would do them no good to attempt to push him aside. So the pair existed in a perpetual eye of the storm of shoppers, making their way this way and that. Their first stop - with the exception of a large map stand placed confusingly far from the entrance - was a record store.
This place at least was a bit less busy, only a dozen or so ponies trotting between the aisles. Most of them were situated around the more modern records. The rock sections, or electronic. Creme, however, meandered to a less populated section.
"Jazz?" Blues asked.
"Uh-huh," Creme replied. "For my mum back in Ponyville. She's always been a big fan of jazz music, and always complained that she never had a chance to go to any shows. Uncle Tannenbaum finally convinced her to get a record player before I moved, but she doesn't have many, so I thought I'd send her one."
"That's a nice idea," Blues said. He smirked, adding, "Your mum has good taste in music."
"You're a fan?" Creme asked. Blues nodded, and the stallion smiled a bit shyly, rubbing his neck. "Then... would you mind helping me pick something out?"
Blues laughed, trotting up to the shelves beside the stallion. "I'd be happy to," he said. "You'll have to give me some hints though, Jazz's been around for a while... does she have a favourite instrument? Musician?"
Creme tapped his chin quietly, considering this. "Um," he said softly. "Now let me think... I seem to remember a couple of years back there was somepony who came to town that she was really excited to see... John MacCloppin, maybe?"
Blues face lit up like a Hearth's Warming tree, tapping at the ground excitedly. "John McCloplin?" He asked. Creme laughed at his exuberance.
"I think so, yeah. You know him?"
"Oh, man," Blues said. "I remember going to see that show, it was amazing. The things that stallion can do with his hooves..." Blues paused, blushing and laughing a bit. "On a guitar, of course. John McCloplin is a guitarist... so let's see if we can find some more guitar..." He grinned broadly as he flipped through the records, naming them off as he saw them. "Let's see... they've got some Herd Ellis, he's pretty good. Kinda mellow, though. There's some Greene... some Jim Halter..." He paused, narrowing his eyes. "No," he said. "No way."
"What's up?" Creme asked, peering in. Blues chuckled, pulling out what he had found and showing it to the stallion.
"They have a recording of the show McCloplin played in Ponyville," he said, laughing. Creme laughed as well.
"Well shoot," he said, his ears flicking happily, "I guess I know what I'm getting her! Thanks, Blues."
"Aw, it was nothing," The colt said, looking away happily. "Honestly, you'd probably have seen it on your own anyways, so it's not like I helped."
"You jogged my memory about the show," Creme said, nudging him gently. "I might have seen it, but I doubt I would have known to get it otherwise. Seriously, thanks."
Blues blushed faintly, rubbing his leg. He found himself strangely anxious again, unable to find anything to say. Instead he simply smiled up at the stallion. Creme smiled back, turning away slightly.
"Do you need to get anything while we're here?" he asked. "If not, I'm gonna go buy this."
Blues chuckled. "There's not another copy of that record, is there?" he asked. Creme chuckled, peeking in between the records.
"M'afraid not," he said. Blues gave a false sigh, stepping away from the shelves.
"I'm good, then," he said.
The pair trotted up to the counter. Creme paid and thanked the cashier quietly, and then they were out into the crowd again. Creme peered down at his bag for a moment, something apparently on his mind.
"Say, Blues," he said. "You play guitar, don't you?"
"Huh? Yeah," Blues asked, a bit surprised by the question, "why do you ask?"
"Just curious, mostly," Creme said. "You seemed to know a lot about Jazz Guitarists right off the top of your head, and I think you mentioned it earlier this week. Plus..." he coughed, nodding his head back and forth. "I remember seeing you playing sometimes back in Ponyville." He chuckled. "Usually for some little orange-and-brown colt..."
Blues winced a bit at the mention of the colt, his head sinking. "Yeah," he said. "My, uh... my ex-coltfriend. I used to play for him a lot. He liked Jazz too... or he liked my playing, least." The colt fell silent, Creme blinking at him.
"I'm sorry, Blues," he said. "I didn't... know it had been a rough -"
"Eh," Blues shrugged, cutting the stallion off before he could touch on anything else sensitive. "It was... almost a year ago now." Part of him wanted to insist that he was over it, but the fact of the matter was he wasn't sure that was true yet. He sighed faintly, but shook his head and smiled. "The store I need to stop by is just around this corner."
"That candy shop?" Creme asked, catching onto the change of subject without missing a beat, something Blues was quite happy with. The colt nodded.
"That's right," he said. "Just a little treat to go with my sister's present - she's got a weakness for this sort of wafer dessert that they don't sell anywhere in Ponyville, so I figured I'd get her a bit."
"That's a good thought," Creme said. He paused as Blues passed into the shop, staring in as though there were an invisible wall upon the threshold. "Ah," he said softly, "I think I'll wait outside. If I went in, well..." he smiled. "Sweet tooth."
Blues chuckled, nodding. "Alright," he said. "I won't be too long."
He headed directly for where he knew the wafers to be, picking up a bundle. He was about to turn around to the counter, when he paused. He looked around for a moment, catching a glimpse of the stallion waiting just outside. Creme was staring into space, waiting patiently.
Blues mulled for a moment, and then a minute. He came to realize that Creme couldn't see him - he was hidden behind the shelves. He looked down hurriedly, scanning the shelves, and grinned. Butterflies fluttered in his stomach, but this time the feeling was good. There was a warmth to it, an excitement. He grabbed a small package off the shelf - a small bundle of chocolates - and carried it up to the counter along with the wafers. He paid for them, thanking the mare behind the counter cheerfully as she deposited the item into a bag.
With that he was gone, nearly dashing out of the store to join Creme. He took a brief moment to shift the bag to the side away from the stallion before trotting alongside him.
"And, back!" he declared cheerfully. Creme smiled and nodded.
"Wow, that was quick," he said. Blues grinned.
"Hey, I said I would be, didn't I?"
"True enough," Creme agreed, smiling a bit wider. "So what's next on the list?"
The rest of their day went much the same. They chattered happily as they slowly made their way through the mall, popping into this store and that. As the day wore on the shops only got busier, just has Creme had predicted. Indeed, by the time they both had finished their shopping they only barely escaped from the mall, swamped as it was with ponies popping in after late shifts and long days.
They managed to squeeze out into the courtyard, which thankfully was severely less populated. The sun was beginning to set, and a chill was settling into the landscape. Blues barely noticed, though. As he had predicted, the weight of his bags was keeping him warm.
"So, what now?" he asked Creme. The stallion smiled, looking up.
"Well," he said. "I was, ah... sort of hoping you might have dinner with me before we went our separate ways... if you happen to know anywhere nearby."
Blues grinned, leaning towards the lowered area. "I think I happen to know somewhere quite nearby," he said. "And I'd love to have dinner with you." he smirked. "We did agree to it earlier this week, after all."
"Heh, right,"Creme said. "There are restaurants down there?"
"A few," Blues said. "It's a food court, basically. They've got lots of places." He led Creme towards the stair down, looking back over his shoulder. "You in the mood for anything special?"
"I might be..." Creme said idly. He coughed. "But I'll wait to see what they've got, I think." Blues raised an eyebrow, but smirked and shrugged.
"Anything you care for, I think," he said. "I've seen Fancee food, Trottingham food, Furheimian..." he laughed. "This is probably the only place in Equestria they serve more non-Equestrian food than Equestrian."
"Probably the only place they serve any non-equestrian food at all," Creme chimed in, chuckling. "Maybe I should give a shot to something Furheimian. You know. Family history and all that."
"Mm, I think that sounds nice too," Blues said. The pair trotted up to the Furhemian stand, both ordering some different strange combination of vegetables and grains, taking the meals to sit down beside the skating rink. the lights surrounding the rink were beginning to flicker on, casting a soft glow over the ponies that glided past. they moved like ghosts over the ice, drifting effortlessly and endlessly in a frictionless sort of ballet. After a while, even the clumsier ponies seemed to blend into the flow and rhythm of it all. Blues watched silently for a long time as he and Creme ate, neither one saying a word. It was a comfortable silence, a content one, a well-deserved break from the conversation of the day. The sun dipped lower in the sky, and Blues sighed.
"Something the matter?" Creme asked. Blues blinked, looking away from the skaters and to the stallion. He blinked, realizing suddenly that they had finished eating.
"Huh? Oh, no," he said. "No, nothing's wrong. I'm just, uh... just..." He was silent for a while, but he smiled. "I'm happy," he said. He looked down. There was a weight to the words, and honesty. He felt good. He felt strong. He felt... strangely free. The coat around his shoulders felt lighter than air, pulling him off the ground and making him just a little bit lighter. "I liked spending today with you," he said. "It made me happy."
Creme raised an eyebrow at this, but smiled back. "It... shows," he said. "You seem a lot different today, Blues. Did something happen this week?"
Blues chuckled. You happened, he thought to himself. He didn't say it, though. Instead he just shook his head. "I guess," he said. "I can't put my hoof on it, though. I mean, I guess I could, but..." He shrugged, folding his hooves.
"But what?" Creme asked. Blues chuckled.
"It's stupid. And embarrassing."
Creme frowned a bit, and leaned in. "Well, I won't make you say if you don't want to," he said, "but I'll admit I'm a bit curious." He paused for a bit, then coughed. "Would it..." he asked softly, "help convince you if I told you a silly embarrassing story of my own?"
Blues chuckled. "You don't have to do that," he said.
"Maybe, but I'd like to hear your story," the broad stallion said again, shrugging. "I... wanna get to know you better, I suppose."
That, it seemed, was all the motivation Blues needed. He blushed faintly, but rubbed his neck. "Well... alright," he said. "It's not... much of a story, though. I mean, it's more of just a weird thought that's been following me around... for a long time." he chuckled. "A long time." He stared down for a while, as though analyzing his empty plate. Eventually though he looked back up, his smile turning a bit wistful.
"You know Creme... for a long time I was convinced this whole year was just gonna be a waste. That it would just be one crappy event after another, but..." he shrugged. "Well, I met you I guess. See, I..." He grappled with his words, trying to find a way to put it. To find a way to finally vocalize the silent ghost that had haunted him for nearly a year. Eventually, he sighed.
"Do you remember the stallion I would play my guitar for back in Ponyville?" he asked. Creme nodded silently. Blues nodded in return. "His name was Caramel," Blues said. "He was my coltfriend... and last Hearth’s Warming I found out he had been cheating on me."
Even saying the words aloud sent a shot through Blues chest, and looking at Creme he could see that the stallion was shocked as well. Somehow, knowing that Creme felt for him made it easier to bear, and Blues found himself continuing.
"We had been together for a... long time by that point," he said. "About a year and a half. I had really wanted to spend Hearth's Warming day with him that year, but we both had family. I got to see him, and wish him a happy Hearth's Warming, but not to spend the day with him. He made a promise to me, though: we would spend the whole next day together. He asked me to come to his apartment at ten in the morning." He chuckled. "I'm not sure how long he would have kept it up if I'd have come at ten, or how long he'd been doing it before that. But I was impatient, so I went early... and I found him in bed with a mare for my troubles."
"A mare?" Creme asked, raising an eyebrow. There was a look of concern on his face, but Blues paid it no heed. The anxiety had returned to him en force, but for once he felt as though he could handle it. He felt as though he needed to handle it, needed to be brave just this once. If he could then he would finally be rid of it forever, banishing it from his thoughts for good. He breathed deep, and continued.
"A mare. He tried to explain, I think. I think she might have too, but it was hard to hear her with her mouth full..." his ears drooped back, but he shook his head. "I left Caramel right then and there. I was angry... really angry. But I was also..." he sagged. "I dunno. Disappointed.
"I tried to get over it, but every time I saw him, or her, I'd just get so angry... I couldn't. I kept... thinking about him, even when I was alone and knew I shouldn’t. I couldn't figure out why he'd done it. I felt like... like..." the words caught in his throat and he swallowed hard, shaking his head.
"The last straw was Hearts and Hooves day. I was still alone, and I saw... I saw the two of them, together. They were happy. I just couldn't take it anymore. I decided that I wasn't going to be able to get over him as long as he was still around, so I left. I came here to Canterlot, trying to start over."
He sighed, staring down at the table. "But I wasn't able to. Everytime I came close to making a friend, I would remember him. what he did to me. I got... scared. I got so afraid, that I just couldn't do it. I would push them away. Act aloof, or mean, and they would stop talking to me." He shrugged. "After a while I got used to it, I guess. Being alone isn't really so bad in the end, and I've got Pluck - my cat. I was... dealing with it. I wasn't happy, but I wasn't so afraid anymore."
"Until I came along?" Creme asked quietly, almost hopefully. "Or... are you gonna act aloof with me too?"
Blues chuckled, shaking his head. "No," he said, some humour returning to his voice. "No, I... you're different, from everypony else. I don't know why, I just feel..." He looked up, smiling softly. "I feel safe with you. I don't feel like you'd do anything to me. I trust that."
Creme blushed vividly, covering his face. He was obviously grinning broadly, and he looked away to hide it. He was strangely cute when his calmness was broken like this, when he was more vulnerable and alive. His ears flicked happily, and he nickered.
"I... thank you, Blues," he said. "I'm glad that you trust me. I... was afraid for a while you wouldn't, when I met you. That you didn't like me, I mean. Or that you'd be afraid of me." He chuckled. "Ponies have been known to be a bit... intimidated by me."
Blues chuckled as well, but shook his head. "No," he said. "I was afraid for a while, I guess... that same anxiety as it always was. But I think I'm over it now. I think I'm over... him, now."
"That's good," Creme said softly, nodding. "I... have never been unlucky enough to have that happen to me. I can't imagine why someone would ever do something like that... and I can't even begin to imagine how much it must hurt." He reached slowly across the table, laying his hoof on Blues'. The little colt stared at it for a minute, smiling. A breeze ran through the tiny square, cutting through his coat and causing him to shiver gently. the cold of it seemed to stick with him, mulling around in his shoulders and back.
"It... hurt a lot," Blues said. "But like I said... A year is a bit silly, isn't it? A whole year later... like some silly song."
Creme paused, laughing suddenly. "I guess that explains it, huh?" he asked. "With the Last Hearth's Warming song?" Blues grinned, dropping his face into his hoof and laughing like a dope.
"Yeah," he said. "Yeah, I can't say that didn't have something to do with why I don't like the song. I used to love it, though. There are times when I honestly think that how much I loved that song is part of why I feel so stupid about all this. I mean... really? I'm playing out a song, now? Is this the kinda stuff that really happens?"
He laughed, rubbing his shoulders. "I feel like I should have gotten over him a long time ago... that's why I was worried this year was gonna be a waste." His smiled turned into a smirk, more than just a little bit wry. "Especially with everything considered..."
"Everything considered?" Creme asked, tilting his head.
"Well, yeah," Blues said. "I mean... I kinda feel like I should have seen it coming. You know? It's not like he didn't tell me well ahead of time..."
"That he was cheating?"
Blues shrugged. "No - well, maybe he gave me some hints. But he told me he was bisexual a little while after we started dating. I guess I should have figured I'd need to share him eventually."
Creme raised an eyebrow at this, but if there was something on his mind he didn't say it right away. He pulled his hoof away just a bit, not enough for Blues to really notice. “Well, no,” he said finally. “You should never have to 'share' if you don't want to. It's not like he was a toy firetruck.”
“Bicycle might be more appropriate,” Blues said, smiling a bit more genuinely at the quip. Creme blinked, but continued.
“Well, either way, He was your coltfriend. If you can share love, that's wonderful, but not everypony can. And even if he did want to have a more open relationship, then he should have told you outright, and discussed it with you.”
“Maybe,” Blues said, leaning heavier against the table. “Course... maybe he did when he told me he was Bi. Maybe he just figured I coulda’ put two and two together.” He sighed, shaking his head.
“He should have at least told you he would be with a mare,” Creme said. “If he was dedicated to you up to that point, then he should have either kept being dedicated or broken it off first instead of abusing your trust in him. My first marefriend left me for another stallion, sure, but she at least left me before she went to him.”
Blues froze, stopping dead in mid-thought. The wind whipped through the rink again, cutting into his shoulders. He trembled, and he was uncertain if it was the cold that had done it, or the sudden sinking in his stomach.
“Y...y-you,” Blues stammered. "Your first marefriend? But I thought you were... gay?"
"I'm bisexual," Creme replied. His face was impassive, save for a slight furrowing of the brow. Blues pulled his hoof away, his shoulders shaking.
He felt as though Creme had punched him in the stomach. His gut ached, his heart pounded. The cold feeling in his shoulders and chest was a freezing pain, like somepony had driven icicles into them.
"I... had no idea," he said.
"I'm not Caramel, Blues," Creme said. Blues shook his head sharply, leaning back.
"No," he said. "No, no, of course you're not. I-I never thought... thought you were." He rubbed his shoulders, shivering violently. "Of course you aren't."
"I'd never do that to you, Blues," Creme said, leaning in.
"That's not what I meant," Blues said quickly, perhaps too quickly. "I never meant that. I never meant you. I just meant... I just meant... I just, I..."
There it was. The anxiety. The fear. In the night, silence. A beating, a pounding, a drumming in his chest. His heart clenched, aching fiercely. His stomach twisted itself into a knot, and amidst it all there was silence, save for that tiny, nearly lost voice in his head.
He'll hurt me, it said. Just like Caramel did.
He shook his head, trying to chase it away, but it would not go.
He’ll leave soon enough, now. It’s just a matter of time.
"Are you okay, Blues?" Creme asked softly.
"I'm fine," Blues insisted. "I'm just cold. Just cold. The coat isn't that warm..." A lump was forming in his throat, making it hard to speak, but he tried his best to gasp out the weak assurances.
The coat that Caramel gave me. The pony who hurt me first.
"I..." Blues said weakly, "I need to go. I need to go home. I'm cold here. I'm sorry Creme."
He didn't wait for the stallion to respond. He grabbed his bags, dashing off before Creme could make a sound, up the stairs and out of the courtyard.
He dashed away from the mall, back down the mountain. He dashed out of the Upper-Middle Quarter, past the ancient building and landmarks. He dashed through crowded streets and empty alleyways, until his breath had gone. He collapsed to his knees, panting and wheezing.
He still hurt inside. His heart still ached, and he was still cold... but he was getting better. The anxiety was still there, but it was fading now that he was away from Creme. He bit his hoof, wheezing through it, and peered up.
He was in a familiar place, he realized. He supposed, through a weak and weary mind, that this was no surprise. This was the street he knew best of all, of course he would return to it. He was in front of the department store, closed early for the night. The insides were darkened, not that he needed to see in to know what the place contained, especially not now. A holiday that wasn't for him, not this year. Perhaps never again.
Perhaps, he thought miserably, he would never be able to share it with a friend. He stared into the window, sighing miserably.
"Why won't you leave me alone?" he asked the air. "I tried... I tried so hard! I thought you left me, but... but... You're still here! Why are you still here!?" He grit his teeth, slamming his hoof against the window. It rang like a gong, and he opened his eyes, staring at his reflection.
What a pathetic pony stared back at him. What a weak, miserable little pony. Pining away over some colt who had moved onto bigger and better things, who had gotten over a bad breakup in a few short months - if that. Had it taken Caramel any time at all to get over Blues? Had he ever been the least bit guilty over what he had done? Had he even stopped to go after Blues?
And yet here was that same pony, the one who had actually been wronged a year later, still obsessed with his ex. It made Blues sick. Everything about him, it all had to go back to Caramel. Even that coat... that same stupid coat.
Blues grit his teeth, seething at the reflection. "Fuck you, you loser," he growled. "Just... just get over him already, why don't you!? He's the one who hurt you, not the other way around, you have nothing to be ashamed of! So why can't you just let go? Why do you have to hold onto everything? Why are you still wearing his Celestia-damned coat!?" He shouted furiously at the reflection in the glass, ripping the coat off. He bunched it up, throwing it furiously at the reflection and stomping on it on the ground.
"I hate you!" he screamed into the night. "I hate you I hate you I hate you! Just leave me alone! You shouldn't be allowed to be happy when I feel like this, you should be the one who's miserable! I hate you!"
He sank against the ground, tears welling up behind his eyes. "Why won't you go away, Caramel?" He asked quietly. "Why didn't you let me at least run away?" He sniffed, laying his head on the coat. It was cold, and wet, and dirty, and probably completely ruined, but it was there, just as it always had been. One way or another, it wasn't going away.
"Blues?"
The colt looked up, to the source of the voice. It was Mr. Tannenbaum, standing in the door of the department store. He must have just been preparing to leave for the night when Blues had arrived. The colt sniffed, looking away.
"Sorry Mr Tannenbaum," he said. "The window isn't damaged, is it?"
"The win... Blues, what are you doing laying in the snow this late at night?" The portly pony trotted out, rubbing his shoulders. "And without a coat? It's freezing out, Blues." He sat down beside the colt, laying a hoof on his back. "What's the matter?"
"Nothing's the matter," Blues replied. Mr. Tannenbaum frowned deeply.
"Don't you dare lie to me, Blues," he said. "Not when you're sitting out here like this. Nopony lays out in the snow unless they have a damn good reason. Now, you're coming inside and you're going to tell me what it is."
"Mr. Tannenbaum, I -"
"Or you're fired."
Blues blinked in shock, staring up at the bearded stallion. For once, there wasn't a hint of a joke in the old pony's face. He was gravely serious. Blues sighed, sniffling again, and got to his hooves. "Alright," he said softly.
Mr. Tannenbaum gathered up the bags, leading the colt inside and into the break room. As soon as they were there he began to fix a pot of coffee. He disappeared while the coffee prepared, heading off into the store. After a few minutes he returned with a large blanket, which he wrapped around blues' shoulders, pouring the colt a cup of the coffee.
"So," Mr. Tannenbaum said. "What's wrong?"
"I..." Blues said, the words refusing to come. He swallowed hard, rubbing his shoulders. "I had a... fight, I guess, with Creme." He shrugged.
Mr Tannenbaum raised an eyebrow. "A fight?" he said. "You two? You seemed thick as thieves... at least by Creme's standards. You know he was never a very social colt, on account of his size... I was glad to see you two getting along... what happened?"
"Something... came out," Blues said. "And... I kinda... freaked out. And I left. I ran away."
"And you regret it?" Mr. Tannenbaum asked. Blues nodded. Mr. Tannenbaum sighed.
"Let me guess," he said. "You found out he was bisexual?"
"Y... yes," Blues said, nodding. "How did you..."
"You're not the first, after all," he said. "His first marefriend left him when he came out... the poor colt. She said she needed a 'real' stallion. Then proceeded to find herself some scrawny little something or other." He sipped from his cup, sighing. "Do you know why I asked you to train him, Blues?" he asked.
"Why?" Blues asked, after a long pause.
"Because I knew that you both had trouble with ponies. I thought - maybe it was dumb - I thought that you would be good for each other. That you could share in that... help each other." He sipped his coffee again, then sighed. "I suppose not."
"Are you disappointed in me?" Blues asked. Mr. Tannenbaum raised an eyebrow.
"What an odd thing to ask," he said. He paused for a while, scratching at his beard. "Are you disappointed in you?"
There was silence in the room for a long time. Blues stared at the table, breathing softly around the heavy lump in his throat. "...Yes," he answered quietly. "Yes, I am. I shouldn't have run. I shouldn't.... shouldn't have judged him like that. I didn't want to push him away, but I did. I still couldn't let go."
"So tell that to him, not me," Mr. Tannenbaum said. "Tell him you're sorry."
"He won't listen now," Blues said. "It won't matter.
"You'd be surprised."
Blues' ears perked. This voice was not his employers, but a different one. It came from behind the break room door.
There was a soft clattering sort of noise behind the door, followed by a brief pause and an even briefer click. The door crept open, pushed by a broad nose. A stallion came into view, and Blues felt his eyes bug. If his mouth did not hang open, it was only due to conscious effort on his part.
"C...Creme?" Blues asked. "What are you doing here? How did you even know I’d be..." He turned to Mr. Tannenbaum, who wore a very faint smile.
“Always helpful folks, pegasi,” the old stallion murmured. “Always willing to pass on a message. In fact, I should go thank her.” He stood, trotting past Creme and out the door, shutting it tight behind him.
Creme kept his head low, trotting quietly up to the table. "I wanted to talk to you," he said.
Blues turned away. He couldn't bear to look at the stallion. His heart ached when he did, his body trembled. "Creme, I'm sorry," he whimpered. He felt the stallion's hoof on his shoulder, slowly turning him around.
"But why?" he asked. "Why are you sorry?"
"Because I ran away?" Blues asked. "Why wouldn't I be sorry? I... I insulted you. Just for being bisexual. And then I didn't even have the decency to face you for it, and I ran away."
"But why did you run away, Blues?" Creme asked. Blues stared into his eyes, and realized for perhaps the first time that the stallion wasn't pressing for information - he was truly, genuinely asking. He was truly and genuinely confused, and wanted to know. This, somehow, made Blues feel so much worse.
"Because... because... because I was afraid," Blues said. Tears rose behind his eyes, his throat filled with a hoof-sized lump.
"Because you were afraid I would hurt you?" Creme asked. Blues shook his head. He felt sick. He felt like he was going to vomit. He felt like his heart was going to burst.
"Because I was afraid had hurt you!" Creme shouted. "Because I spat in your face after you'd been nice to me. Because I... Because I..." He rubbed his shoulders. "Because I would have deserved it if you hurt me."
"Blues," Creme said, his voice going quiet. He took a step closer, sitting down beside the shivering colt. "Blues, nothing you could do would make you deserve to be hurt. Why would you ever think that?"
"Creme," Blues whimpered. "When Caramel cheated on me I was angry, yeah, but... I also felt guilty. I felt like I'd done something to deserve it." He sniffed loudly, and tears began to roll down his face. "He made me feel worthless, Creme... like I wasn't good enough for him. Like I would never be good enough for him. Because if I was enough, then he wouldn't have cheated on me. So It must have been my fault, somehow. I felt so useless, for the longest time. I felt so scared of meeting new ponies, because I felt like eventually they'd find out I was useless too, and then they'd leave. Like they'd always leave." He sobbed, choking on the words. "I wanted so badly to be better, but I was so scared that I never would be. I pushed everyone away so that they wouldn't see how worthless I must have been, and they could never hurt me... But then you came along.
"And you were so amazing, Creme! You have no idea. you were so attractive, and so strong and so cool, and in spite of everything you liked me. You liked me even after I kept sticking my hoof in my mouth. In a whole year, you were the first pony who really made me feel like I was worth something. Like I was good enough for somepony.
"And then..." He sniffed, trying to rub the tears out of his eyes, but they kept coming. "And then I had to go and fuck it up. It wasn't even because you were bisexual... I don't think bisexuals are all cheaters, I swear I don't, I just wanted there to be some reason for him to have cheated on me... and I took it out on you. Perfect, amazing, gorgeous you... I knew you'd drop me right there, I knew it... so I ran."
Creme shook his head, pulling the crying pony into his chest. Blues sobbed, but snuggled into the thick barrel, letting his tears soak into the fur. "Blues," he said softly. "I... I can't say I wasn't hurt by the things you said... but I know that you were just angry at Caramel. I knew that wasn't how you really felt. I was never going to 'drop you', I just wanted to understand."
They were silent then. Creme held Blues close, the colt trying his hardest not to cry. He would sob now and then, but after a while he managed to calm himself. "I'm so sorry," he said softly. Creme hugged him tighter.
"I know you are," the stallion said. “But you don’t need to be.”
Blues sighed sadly, clearing his eyes. The tears had stopped now. He felt empty, but... clean. “Can I...” he asked, “make it up to you anyways?”
“If you like,” Creme said. “Do you have plans for this Hearth’s Warming? Spending it with anyone?”
“My cat?” Blues asked, chuckling. “No... I didn’t have any real plans to spend it with anypony... why?”
Creme smiled, hugging the little blue colt. “I know how you can make it up to me, then,” he said.
***
A fire popped and crackled in Mr Tannenbaum's fireplace, burning bright and warm to stave off the chill of the morning. Blues sat close by it, staring out over the room a bit awkwardly. It was not that he particularly minded his position - it was undeniably better than the Hearth's Warming he had had planned alone. It was simply that he felt very peculiar sitting in the home of his employer, wearing a sweater knit by said employer’s wife, at the invite of said employer’s nephew.
Still, as Creme took a seat beside him by the fire, the colt didn't find himself complaining. What he did find himself doing was leaning in against the stallion's side gently. Creme chuckled, offering him a cup of cocoa. Blues took it gratefully, sipping as Mr. Tannenbaum entered to room.
"Well," He declared, clapping his hooves together as he took a seat by the tree. "Are you young stallion's ready for a little bit of gift-giving?"
"You bet!" Creme said. Blues grinned as well.
"Yup," he said.
"That's good," Mr. Tannenbaum said cheerfully, "because otherwise we were starting without you! Now, this first gift is from..."
Blues was silent for the most part as the gifts were exchanged, save for laughing and oohing where appropriate. He felt as though he had been swapped with Creme, with how excited the brawny stallion seemed with every gift given and received, even those not for or from him. Blues smiled as he watched. Their 'fight', such as it was,seemed so far away now for something hardly a week gone. The stallion was as warm and gentle with him as though nothing had ever happened. Indeed, there were times Blues wondered if he even did remember, or if it had truly happened at all and not been some dreadful bad dream.
"Now, we've just got a couple more gifts," Mrs. Tannenbaum - a downright scrawny pegasus mare with a long, flowing mane - said, pulling a small bundle and a box out from under the tree. She checked the tags on them, grinning, and handed the bundle to Blues and the box to Creme. "Why don't you two take care of the giving, hm?"
Blues chuckled, staring down at the bundle. It was the gift he had gotten Creme from the candy store. He grinned up at the stallion, offering the package. Creme took it gratefully, handing the box to Blues.
The colt undid the ribbon wrapped around it, tearing off the packaging. It was a rectangular white box, completely unmarked. Tilting his head, he pulled the lid off, and gasped.
Inside was a vivid, midnight-blue peacoat with shining buttons and soft felt. Save for a small patch sewn over the right elbow it looked brand-new, but that one patch was all it took for Blues to recognize it.
“It’s... it’s my coat,” Blues whispered.
"I found it outside the store," Creme said softly. "It was in pretty bad shape, but I managed to clean it and fix it up... you said it was your favourite."
"Creme," Blues said, smiling from ear to ear, "I... I don't know what to say."
"How about Happy Hearth's Warming?" the stallion suggested. Blues laughed, pressing his face happily into Creme's shoulder. "Happy Hearth's Warming," he chimed. "But now I feel bad I just got you a little bit of candy..."
"Oh, pish," Mr Tannenbaum said, waving a hoof. "It's the thought that matters, not the price tag. You Equestrians." His wife smacked him, and he laughed wildly, but Blues and Creme didn't seem to notice.
"If you really feel that way," Creme suggested, "I do have an idea."
"What's the that?" Blues asked.
"Well," Creme replied, "Uncle Tannenbaum owns a guitar... and even since we talked in the music store, I've wanted to hear you play."
A slow smile drifted across Blues face, spurred on by the awkwardly smiling stallion. "I think I can do that," he said. "And I think I know the perfect song."
Mr Tannenbaum jumped to his hooves, trotting into another room. Creme and Mrs. Tannenbaum shifted around, making room for Blues to relocate to the centre of the floor when Mr. Tannenbaum returned, guitar in hoof. He handed it to Blues, who accepted it gratefully. After a moment of playing with the tuning knobs, he ran his hoof along the strings, strumming it. He looked to Creme, then, his smile becoming so wide it could be seen from miles away. He plucked the strings, and began to sing.
"Last Hearth’s Warming
I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away.
This year
To save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special..."
