Adventures of the screw

by Scourgefan

Rating: everyone
Tags: Random, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Other, Adventure, Derpy Hooves
Length: 965

follow Screwloose and her friends on multiple weird journeys. please only constructive criticism, this is my first fanfic on this site, okay?

this is about Screwloose and her friends doing the weird stuff that crazy ponies do. this is not a one shot, to let you know(but you probably can guess that already) i am using OC's and such, so don't be afraid to ask if you can be in it. please don't criticize too much, okay?

Published 2012-12-25 01:20:02 UTC
Last updated 2012-12-25 01:20:02 UTC

chapter 1

Screwloose had been in the asylum for 2 weeks now. Screwball look at her in the Strait jacket leaning against the padded wall.

“it's not fair Loosey, they can't just lock you in here.” Screwball said.

Screwloose barked in agreement.

“we need to get you out of here, you could do so much more.”

again, Screwloose barked.

“I'll get Derpy and we'll come tonight.”

Screwloose whined as if she were saying “but what if it fails? Then you guys will be trapped too”

“don't worry about that Loosey, I have it all covered.”

Screwloose then barked twice as to say “great, it's a plan!”

~~~
it was 3 in the morning. Screwball and Derpy were hiding outside the hospital.

“i just don't know, Screwy, what if we get caught? Then we'll be the three craziest ponies in equestria.” Derpy said.

“no, those are Pinkie, Twilight and Fluttershy....don't ask.” Screwball said.

“but I still know, if we fail, then we'll be the laughing stalks of Ponyville.” Derpy said.

“no, we'll just be locked up in a squishy room with no escape, ponies constantly coming in to tell us how crazy we are, with abusive doctors and nurses who do electroshock therapy or fun, it could be a lot worse though.” Screwball said casually.

“okay, now tell me 1 way it could be worse than that.” Derpy said.

“well, we could be stoned.” Screwball said.

“have you been eating my special muffins?” Derpy asked.

“what, no. I mean they could tie us to a stick and throw rocks at us while we beg for mercy, what did you think I meant?” Screwball explained.

Derpy had a terrified expression in her crossed eyes. “great, now you've managed to scare me even more.”

“relax, they don't do that anymore, they just put a helmet on your head and send currents of painful electricity through your veins and don't let you die from it, it's not nearly as bad as stoning.” Screwball explained.

“okay, going home and eating pot muffins is sounding better and better.” Derpy said.

“shut up and pick the lock.”

“what, I thought you were gonna do that!” Derpy exclaimed.

“no, I'm gonna get the strait jacket off.” Screwball said.

“i am so going to murder you in your sleep if you get me stuck here.” Derpy said as she picked the lock.

“yeah, yeah, for now, let's focus on not murdering each other.” they walked down the halls of the hospital until the came to room 4-A, then Derpy picked the lock with her Swiss army knife(don't ask)and they walked into the room. “where did you get that knife?” Screwball asked.

“THE WORDS SAID DON'T ASK!” Derpy screamed. “do you WANT to be murdered by Celestia?”

“.....they're just words. Now tel me, where did the knife come from?”

“well, it's for a project in my basement, I have lots more knives and such, but this is my favorite.” Derpy explained.

“I'm probably gonna regret asking, but, what's the project, and, can I help?” Screwball asked.

“well....i can't tell you and you can't poke your snout into it, risky business.” Derpy explained.

“so in other words, Pinkie pie?” Screwball asked.

“pretty much, I got the idea from her, and I have to say, my muffins are tasting better than ever.”

Screwloose barked, as she was getting annoyed of her friends talking about Pinkie, she had been chosen once, she wouldn't tolerate talk of it.

“oh, right, the reason we're here, well, Derpy, gimme your knife.” Screwball said.

“my lucky eyeball gouger, no way!” Derpy exclaimed.

“well what do I use to cut the jacket?” Screwball asked.

“use your teeth or something, you are the element of chaos.”

“oh yeah.” Screwball muttered. She focused and in seconds the jacket was shredded in bits on the ground. “chaos always has it's advantages.” Screwball said.

The three ran out of the room and towards the exit. They were all shocked when they saw someone blocking the exit. It wasn't a pony though. It was a cat thing. It was the size of a pony. It was white with black spots and blue eyes.

“escaping, huh? Easier said than done.” the cat said in a low voice.

Screwloose growled and barked at her.

“crap, the doctors....run, I'll stall.” the cat stepped toward the entrance as the other three ran.

A orange pony with a gray Mohawk looked at the cat. “trying to escape again claw? You know we're one step ahead of you.” he said.

“i know Firebolt, but I wasn't escaping.” Claw said.

“well then what were you doing?” Firebolt asked.

“i was helping somepony who still had a chance at life, but why explain to you, you would probably kill me now just to get a lunch break.” Claw growled.

“back to your cell, fool.” Firebolt told her.

Claw just stared at him, unmoving. It looked as if she wasn't breathing she was so still.

“so you're going statue on me? Coward.”

Claw glared deep into his eyes. “it's not statue.....it's Stephano.” she said.

“are you STILL watching that one guy on YouTube?” Firebolt asked.

“duh, he's awesome, and one more thing.....”Claw said looking at the moon. After a few seconds she turned back to him with yellow eyes. “you're dead.” she sprang upon him and slashed his Jugular. “rest in pieces, son of a barrel.”

~~~
the other three were still running. "let's go to my place." Derpy said.

"fine by me, as long as you promise not to show us the basement." Screwball said.

"fine, whatever you say, not that i would do that to you guys anyway." Derpy agreed.

"good, i don't wanna be turned into a muffin, but i would like to try these special muffins of yours."

"whatever, just keep walking."