Secret Crush

The timber wolf snapped its large jaws down at Joe but despite all his injuries Joe was easily able to outpace the large timber wolf and swung the axe into the side of its head. The timber wolf stopped for a moment and it was as if its life drained out of its eyes. Joe let out a sigh but suddenly the timber wolf let out a howl of anger and swatted Joe away, leaving the axe tuck in the side of its head.

Joe tumbled along the ground and he skidded to a stop, staggering to his feet Joe managed to ready himself in a combat stance. The timber wolf snarled and swatted the axe, knocking the axe blade out of its skull and propelling through the air. “Oh shit” Joe mumbled and the timber wolf was about to charge again when a voice called out “WAIT!”. Both Joe and the timber wolf stopped and looked to the voice’s origin.

Standing close to their battle stood the light yellow Pegasus known as Fluttershy. “Fluttershy?... run” Joe ordered but Fluttershy stepped forward, “Joe sometimes violence doesn’t solve anything, it only makes it worse” Fluttershy replied and stepped a little closer to the timber wolf. “Fluttershy… this is one of those times when violence solves the problem” Joe informed her but Fluttershy ignored his warning and stepped up to the mighty timber wolf and began to coo it.

At first the gleam of death still lingered in its eyes but soon its eyes grew into a look of love and compassion. Fluttershy turned to Joe, “See? sometimes you just need a loving touch” Fluttershy told Joe. “I don’t fucking believe this” Joe muttered to himself, Fluttershy turned back to the large timber wolf, “Okay now little one, you can go back to your den and” Fluttershy began but suddenly the massive timber wolf swatted her against a tree. Fluttershy screamed as the timber wolf pounced on her, Joe groaned to himself as he charged the timber wolf and slammed a punch right into the side of the timber wolf’s head.

The force of his punch dazed the timber wolf and sent it staggering back. “Fluttershy it’s time to” Joe began but the timber wolf regained its posture before Joe could finish and swatted him to the side. Joe looked to Fluttershy “RUN… GET TO THE… BARN” Joe yelled, he was about to yell ‘GET TO THE CHOPPA’ but didn’t think she’d understand the badly timed joke. Fluttershy looked to Joe then to the timber wolf. “No, I won’t leave you” Fluttershy replied valiantly, Joe rolled his eyes.

The timber wolf charged Joe and he rolled to the side and dodged its charge, turning back to Fluttershy he yelled again “Go… I got this, don’t worry about me just run… or actually don’t run, fly” Joe ordered her but she disobeyed his orders and charged right up to the timber wolf and looked it straight in the eyes. “HOW DARE YOU!” Fluttershy yelled and gave the timber wolf those creepy eyes that Joe had seen her do before. Joe got up and was about to just let Fluttershy do her thing but then he caught a glint of evil in the timber wolf’s eyes. “NOOOO” Joe yelled and jumped in front of Fluttershy as the timber wolf swung its claws at Fluttershy. The claws cut up Joe’s chest pretty bad and sent him tumbling across the ground.

Fluttershy gasped and the timber wolf changed its attention back to her but suddenly a steel toed boot hit it in the side of the head, then another. The timber wolf growled and looked to Joe who had taken of his boots and thrown them at the timber wolf, “Yeah that’s right Christmas tree, I’m still kicking… so fight me” Joe yelled and the timber wolf charged at Joe. Joe lept to one side dodging the timber wolfs charge, rolled then quickly got back to his feet. He looked to Fluttershy “This is the part where you fly away” Joe told her. She finally accepted the fact that she was more of a distraction to Joe than a help, “I’m sorry” Fluttershy apologized. “Just run… I mean fly” Joe said as the timber wolf charged him again.

Joe lept into the air as the timber wolf was about to tackle him again and landed on its back. Fluttershy took off into the air and looked sadly back to Joe, she had seen how much he was bleeding, though not fatal he would need medical attention and soon. Joe wrestled with the mighty timber wolf and even though he was injured and fatigued worse than the timber wolf, Joe easily over powered it. Getting the timber wolf into a head lock Joe began to apply extreme amounts of pressure around its neck in an attempt to kill it, or whatever the hell you call it when the timber wolf dies before it comes back.

The timber wolf squirmed and Joe’s wounded arm flared up in pain. Joe lost his grip with his left arm and the timber wolf bit down hard on his already wounded arm. “STUPID MUTT” Joe roared and began slamming his right fist into the side of its head. The timber wolf became dazed but still held onto Joe’s arm with its teeth. Joe stabbed two fingers into the wolf’s eyes and it howled in pain and let go of his arm.

Joe pulled his arm out of its mouth but then used both fist to pummel the wolf’s head. “Every-pony freeze” yelled an uneasy voice. Joe looked to the voice but the timber wolf used the distraction and bucked Joe of its body and stood up but then saw a pistol being held in a magical purple aurora. “Wait a minute Twilight?” Joe asked in the confusion, the timber wolf knew what the handgun could do and despite its regenesis powers the pistol still hurt beyond belief and it didn’t want to be shot again.

“Joe… a little help?” Twilight asked Joe quickly knew what she was talking about and lept on the distracted timber wolf. It struggled but Joe wrapped his arms underneath the front legs of the wolf and upwards, like a full nelson. “Joe… what if I hit you?” Twilight gasped, Joe considered it for a moment then shook off the thought. “Just aim for its head” Joe ordered. Its head stood at least another foot and a half above Joe’s, now that Joe was holding it up. Twilight levitated up the pistol in front of her so she could zero in a shot. “DO IT” Joe yelled as his muscles burned in exhaustion but in her lack of knowledge for firearms, Twilight pressed the magazine release button and the magazine ejected from the handle of the pistol and fell to the ground.

“Oh you have got to fucking me” Joe muttered to himself, Twilight looked at the gun curiously. “Well this is a silly design, how in Equestria do you use this thing” Twilight asked and began examining the gun further. Joe groaned to himself and then Twilight looked down the barrel of the gun. Joe, in his fear for Twilight’s safety, let go of the timber wolf. “Don’t look down the barrel” Joe yelled but the timber wolf took advantage of Joe’s outburst and head-butted him forward, sending him tumbling to the ground.

The timber wolf stalked forward like a predator about to pounce on its prey, which technically it was. “Give me the damn gun” Joe muttered as he grabbed the fresh magazine from the ground. Twilight levitated the pistol down to Joe just as the timber wolf lept at them. He wouldn’t have time to load the magazine into the pistol and one round wouldn’t be enough so in his desperate situation Joe kicked the timber wolf with his foot, landing a powerful strike into its side and sending it propelling away from them for the moment being. “How do you kill these things” Joe asked Twilight and she shook her head. “Only fire can kill a timber wolf” Twilight informed him frantically. Joe chuckled “If it bleeds, we kill it” Joe laughed but Twilight shook her head “It doesn’t bleed though” Twilight informed Joe and he sighed, ‘Well thanks for ruining the punch line’ Joe thought to himself. “Well then… let’s burn old FIDO” Joe chuckled as he got to his feet, he spotted the axe and charged over to it.

“Hey FIDO, your owner called, said he wanted you put down” Joe said as he picked up the axe. “Come on pouch… it’s time to put you down the hard way” Joe said as the timber wolf charged Joe. As the timber wolf charged Joe swung the M1911 up and lined up a quick shot, BLAM. The handgun thundered in the rather quiet forest and the .45 caliber round ripped through the air and smashed through the timber wolf’s left eye. The timber wolf screeched in pain as the vision for its left eye was taken, Joe shifted his aim a little to the right, BLAM, another .45 round ripped through the air and took out the timber wolfs other eye.

Joe charged forwards, his mighty handgun thundering in his hands and kicking violently as it spat out lead death into the timber wolfs face. Spent brass littered the ground as the slid of the gun cocked back with each shot, ejecting the spent casing and loaded a fresh round into the chamber. The creature screeched as rounds tore through its skull. Joe emptied the magazine and loaded a fresh one, the .45 handgun began to thunder out more rounds again and the creature fell back in pain. Joe rushed up to it and put his knee down on its chest so it couldn’t move, putting the gun right up to its forehead and whispering “Goodnight Mr. Wolf”. Pulling the trigger until the slid of the gun locked back, signaling that the gun was out of ammo.

Joe holstered the gun and held the fire axe in both hands and hacked at the body of the timber wolf. The pieces of forest that created the body fell apart but Joe continued to hack it apart until they were simply little pieces of kindling. Joe was breathing heavily and his blood was dripping onto the ground profusely.

Joe staggered up to his feet and stumbled over to Twilight and collapsed on the ground in front of her. “It’s over… it’s finally over” Joe muttered but a look of fear entered Twilight’s face as the timber wolf reformed its body. “Joe… we have to go now” Twilight whispered and Joe looked back but simply smiled. “It can’t hurt us” Joe muttered.

The timber wolf stepped forward but as it did its leg fell apart and its body collapsed onto the ground and shattered apart. “How… how did you do that?” Twilight gasped and Joe chuckled, “Cut it up so bad that when it reformed its body would simply fall apart” Joe informed her as he loaded a fresh magazine into his pistol.

Joe staggered to his feet and grunted in pain, “Hey Twilight… think you can heal my wounds?” Joe asked and she looked to his body wounds. “Yes but I’ll have to extract all the teeth and fangs from your body first” Twilight informed him and he nodded. The timber wolf tried to reform its body as Twilight and Joe left but once again its body crumbled. The green haze of life that held the timber wolf’s body parts together left the current body of the timber wolf and flew back into the Everfree in search of a new body.

Joe and Twilight walked back to the apple family barn, at this time most of Joe’s body was covered in blood and he was staggering badly. Applejack and Scootaloo rushed out of the barn, Applejack had gotten a bunch of supplies: lasso, another axe etc. “Oh good gravy Joe… what happened?” Applejack asked worriedly and Joe staggered past them. “I killed it” Joe chuckled and collapsed on the barn floor.

Twilight levitated him up onto a table and pulled of the remains of his tattered tank top and jeans. “Joe… I’m going to have to put you to sleep so your body doesn’t go into shock… you’ll probably wake up in the hospital but your wounds will be healed, okay” Twilight informed him and he nodded. “Wait” Joe muttered and looked to Scootaloo, “What was all that about anyway?” Joe asked and she looked at him with an angered face. “You played me… you used me, made me feel like we had something then it turned out you were bucking Applejack” she scowled. Both Joe’s and Applejack’s eyes went wide in shock. “WHAT!” they both gasped, “Don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about… I saw both of you… in the back of Sweet Apple acres” Scootaloo said as tears began to roll down her face.

“Whoa… just hold yer horses there sugar cube… what in tarnation did yah think ah was doin with Joe?” Applejack asked and Scootaloo gave her a rather uneasy look. “Isn’t it obvious… you two were bucking” Scootaloo replied, Joe chuckled “Yeah that’d be the day”. The group looked to Joe, “What… you didn’t really think I was bucking Applejack did you… I mean you heard that from one of the football guys right?” Joe asked, pretty positive that she probably over heard one of the guys saying something like “Joe’s bucking with Applejack again” or something along those lines. “No I heard it from Tiara” Scootaloo replied.

Joe groaned in anger, “I am going to kill that bitch” Joe mumbled. “Listen kid… I wouldn’t be bucking Applejack for two reasons: one she’s my boss that took me in when I had no place to go and two… well actually I can only think of one reason” Joe said and chuckled. “So if you aren’t bucking then why was Joe holding you up like that?” Scootaloo asked and Applejack chuckled. “Ah can’t shoot a gun without his help” Applejack informed her.

Scootaloo’s look of anger turned to one of sadness as she realized that she had been fooled by Tiara and almost had Joe die to save her. She grabbed Joe and began to cry. “I’m so sorry Joe… I didn’t know what I was thinking and” she began but Joe grunted in pain, “Hey kid… I still got teeth stuck in me… tell you what. When I get all the teeth and fangs pulled out then you can hug me all you want but for now let’s hold of the hugging” Joe chuckled painfully.

Fluttershy landed blissfully down and Joe looked to her. “Yeah speaking of which… why were you there… and Twilight why did you show up?” Joe asked them. “Oh well… I was actually just having a tea party with some of my animal friends when your gun shots scarred them off. I was going to scold you but when I showed up I realized that you were in a bad situation so I came to help you out” Fluttershy replied shyly as she rubbed her hoof through the sandy ground timidly.

“Well actually I came to talk to Applejack about the next batch of apple cider but Big Macintosh told me she was out back shooting with Joe so I simply followed the gun shots” Twilight informed them. “Well thanks… I don’t know if I would’ve made it without your help” Joe told them both, “No… despite my better knowledge, I think you could’ve taken on the timber wolves without our help and made it back in one piece” Twilight replied. “Well doc… heal me up” Joe chuckled.

As Twilight cast the sleep spell on Joe he began to fade out and at seemingly the last possible moment Scootaloo rushed to his side and kissed him full on the mouth, but Joe didn’t remember it too well since he was already fading out and he didn’t remember much after her lips met his.