Bum

by FirePenguin

Rating: teen
Tags: Sex, Random, Adventure, Anthro, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Spike, Comedy, Cutie Mark Crusaders, Other, Romance
Length: 856

Spike, now with no responsibilities, finally bears the fact that he's...a bum.

Spike, now with no responsibilities, finally bears the fact that he's...a bum. Coming to terms with reality, he realizes that this cannot go on for much longer, and makes plans to mature, rather than sulk in the tedious amount of free time he has.

Published 2012-12-30 14:30:01 UTC
Last updated 2012-12-30 14:30:01 UTC

1. Sunset

That all too familiar ceiling came into view.
The dim light emitting from a half closed window illuminated the dragon's accommodation.
The cold air drifted across his scales.

Slowly, and I mean SLOWLY, Spike woke up.

He blinked once. Then twice, trying to focus his salty, dry eyes.

Spike then rolled onto his side, stretching his legs, arms, and of course, his tail.

He stared at his room. He noticed how unclean it was, and made plans to clear it up.... eventually. He then focused on a pile of jewels that accumulated the corner area of the room, and felt a sense of pride. His stash had grown, and just staring at it, he had the desire to crawl atop of it, providing the ultimate protection for cherished gems. Then, on his workspace (never been used) were picture, neatly framed and positioned. The photos depicted his friends, whom he had neglected to spend time with over the many, many years he's been "busy."

Agonizingly, Spike sat up, and lifted himself from his so, so, comfy...bed, distancing himself from the somber thoughts.

The moment he had stood up, he felt unbalanced, almost as if he had forgotten to stand without falling over.

He then made his way over to his bathroom, making creaking noises with every sluggish step.

It's so quiet...

Finally, he was there. The six steps it took to trudge to the bathroom felt like it was an expedition.
Spike turned on the light, illuminating the entire room with a bright white glow.
Slowly, he looked up at the mirror, and that face staring at him.

Dark circles around the eyes.
Messy Spikes.
And...dirty. All the signs of someone who sleeps more than 12 hours a day.

Then he took a look at his body.
Unhealthy.

When was the last time i ate?
Well i know it was a weekend. If only weekends meant something to me anymore.

Lingering in the blazing room, with that drowsy face staring back at him, he forgot why he went in there.
With a sigh, he turned and headed out.

More sluggish steps, more creaking footstep notes.

The first thing his eyes met was the window.

Did i really wake up that early? Do i finally get to see a sunrise?!?!

He rushed over to the small window, noting that one of his legs had become cramped. No surprise.

Spike gazed out into Ponyville, seeing the large orb rise, casting its mellow orange glow across the whole town.
Except it wasn't rising, it was setting, and the scene was getting darker.

Really? You slept through an entire DAY?!?!?!

Emotionally paralyzed, he remained at the window, just peering out at the display.
It seemed like hours, bitter, dismal hours.
Eventually, it was dark. Completely dark.

Spike removed his hands from the window, and glumly made his way to his bed.

The melody of the creaking wood was now bothersome to the peaceful silence.

The dragon lay down, taking up the entire bed, and then some.

I cant sleep. . I always fall asleep! Whats going on?

You fell asleep for an entire day!

So?

"SO"? Dont you feel bad?

Well, kinda.

You should! You moron!

Is it normal for a dragons conscience to be bitterly hostile toward them?

Only the bums.

Are you calling me a...

A bum? Yes.

Well, I guess you're right.

Heh. never thought I'd hear that.

Well um....What should i do?

You figure it out, it's not that hard, dimwit.

Um... so do I just not sleep as often?

That's a start. But there's lots more to do if you want to be successful.

Lot's? How many?

Make a list.

A list? I'm not turning into a Twilight. I think i'd rather be a bum.

MAKE A DAMN LIST

Remind me to get bigger quills.

That's not your job. Speaking of jobs, GET ONE.

Oh, okay, that's number one on the list. Next?

Take a shower?

That's a little rude.... even for me.

Well , you do kinda need one.

Okay, sure. Ill take one eventually. This is serious though.
Maybe I should visit my old friends, AppleJack, Rarity, and the others.

Others?

Yea, Uh.... Rainbow CR-Dr-Dash. Rainbow Dash. Yea. And the Pink one.
And maybe I should exercise more... And eat more...
I wonder how Twilight's been getting her letters to the princess. I haven't breathed fire in years...
Oh, i forgot to thank Rarity for my birthday present, two years ago. I wonder if they still fit...

Spike continued like this, making a lengthy list of any desired act toward becoming an improved, sophisticated, employed dragon, and he would take as much time as he needed, if he needed it. He kept detailing his list, making sure it had everything, and kept writing, until his claws were so cramped they wouldn't abide to his brain's commands, and slumber soon followed. You would think a dragon could stay up more longer than an hour after sleeping for a day, but no. Spike, for once in a long time, conceived a dream.

Author's Note

Re-Re-Edited.
Much better, I think. ;3