Dash's New Pets

by Servomoore

Rating: teen
Tags: Derpy Hooves, Applejack, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Tank, Rainbow Dash, Comedy, Scootaloo
Length: 10132

That falcon and eagle that Rainbow Dash didn't adopt are back. This time, she'll adopt them or really regret it.

The hawk and eagle that Rainbow Dash rejected as pets in favor of Tank are back. And this time, they will become her pets. They will be her only pets, whether Dash wants them or not.

Published 2013-05-29 21:40:02 UTC
Last updated 2013-05-29 21:40:02 UTC

Rainbow Dash's New Pets

Dash's New Pets

Scootaloo was riding on the stretch of road that ran along Sweet Apple Acres, looking forward to hanging out with Apple Bloom and trying to make Cheerilee's latest assignment fun. There wasn't much she could do for on normal road for scooter tricks and nopony to show them off to anyway, so she was just flapping her wings and going a good clip. She came to a sudden stop when several squirrels ran onto the road a ways ahead of her. They were carrying an apple with them.

"Give that back, ya varmints!" Applejack yelled as she gave the squirrels chase. Looking at the squirrels as they went past, Scootaloo had an idea.

"Heads up, Applejack!" she yelled, going fast enough she was already almost past the squirrels. She took a hard right and then took another hard right to intercept the varmints. With precision timing, she executed a dynamite spin kick and knocked the apple out of the squirrel's grasp, sending it flying towards Applejack. The squirrels continued fleeing as Scootaloo braked hard, turning to her friend's older sister in the hope of receiving a thanks, wink, or maybe a hoof up. Instead she saw that Applejack was rubbing her nose, Apparently yelling 'heads up' hadn't been enough warning to allow Applejack to catch the apple.

"Thanks, Scootaloo," Applejack said half-heartedly, sliding a hoof under the apple and placing it on her back.

"Squirrels are real bad this year," Scootaloo said as she saw another group of squirrels dart away from the orchard.

"Worse than mice, the lil' cusses! Overpopulated the Everfree Forest like crazy, now we all gotta bust our flanks to keep 'em away from our apples." Applejack saw the worry that came over Scootaloo's face at that and sighed. "Yeah, even Apple Bloom's taken part now, and it'll probably take her all day. Although-"

"Sis, halp!" Apple Bloom screamed. Scootaloo and Applejack looked over to see the Crusader being borne away on what seemed a wave of squirrels being chased away from the orchard by Winona. Winona was on stilts so as to convinces squirrels running into the trees wouldn't help as per Twilight's surprisingly effective suggestion. Applejack growled in frustration.

"Not again," Applejack muttered. "Y'all better take off 'fore somethin' like that happens to ya." Scootaloo hadn't really needed the suggestion as she went scootering away while Applejack went to rescue her sister.

***

Ten minutes later, Scootaloo was riding along a nameless cliff overlooking the Ponyville River. She was feeling in the zone and begining to descend downhill and on the way she would reach some really breakneck speed. She was becoming delighted with her speed and the ease with which she'd gone uphill. Her wings must have had a considerable growth spurt lately. Maybe that went to show that it wouldn't be too long before she would be flying u-

A squirrel ran into the middle of the path and then stopped as Scootaloo came right at it as squirrels are wont to do. Startled by its sudden appearance and already going fast enough it was hard to control her scooter, Scootaloo swerved less than gracefully to avoid the little rodent. Thereupon she wiped out, sent rolling from her scooter.

"Augh! Ouk! Waaaaauugh!" Scootaloo rolled off the cliff, plunging down to the river on her back. Halfway in her plummet, her front right leg struck a small rocky outcropping, fracturing her radius bone. The pain was so sudden and intense that it knocked her unconscious even as she was sort of spun by the impact so that she faced downwards when she landed in the river. She bobbed to the surface a few seconds later, still face down.

***

Rainbow Dash's pet turtle Tank was flying over Ponyville, looking this way and that. The sky was free of clouds, which meant that she'd finished taking care of the clouds and was hopefully free now. But where in Ponyville was sh-

"LOOK OUT!" Rainbow yelled. With too much momentum to stop in time, she crashed hooves first into the butt of Tank's shell, sending her pet flying like a hockey puck. After shaking out her hooves and taking half a second to recover, Dash darted after her pet and caught him before he crashed into the side of the Ponyville Library. "Sorry, Tank. You okay, dude?" Dash turned her turtle around. Tank had a smile when she turned him to face her, and she sighed in relief. Then Tank's head ducked back inside his shell. It came back out with a yellow and green ball in his mouth. Dash beamed. She loved to play catch with Tank! So far, she'd caught the ball every time Tank had thrown it! But then she remembered what she'd been doing before colliding with her pet.

"Oh, catch is gonna have to wait. I've gotta ask Spike to send my report to the Cloudsdale Weather Control Center. But it should only take five." Tank nodded, and then smacked his lips in thirst. He gestured his head over in the direction of the Ponyville River, since it would take him about five minutes to get over there and back and get a drink of fresher water than the pond provided. "Yeah, I'll meet you there." Feeling in a giddy mood, Tank stretched out his neck and began nuzzling Dash's nose. Startled, Dash pushed him away while looking around.

"Not here! Later!" She saw a couple ponies scattered about, but none of them seemed to be paying any attention to them, When she looked back at Tank, he'd already taken off for the river. Dash smiled wistfully, glad she had a pet like Tank. Then she swooped down to the library's front door.

***

The scene picturesque as Tank landed at the riverside and began to drink greedily, as was only natural after Dash had done a full sky clearing. The sunlight dappled in the water, a pleasant breeze bringing the smell of apples from the Acres, and sound of birds rehearsing for their next show with Fluttershy. It was perfect for a game of catch.

Then Tank heard the sound of a filly shrieking, then crying from pain, the sound coming nearer. He looked up in time to see Scootaloo, unconscious from the pain, falling limply into the water face down. Not the fastest creature in Equestria, it took him a moment to get his propeller going and to fly over to her body as it drifted down the river. Not being well-trained in first aid, the first thing he did was turn her head, lifting her snout out of the water. He screamed, his attempts to push or lift her beyond turning her head fruitless. And it was getting worse, for the narrowing river was slowly but steadily increasing the current's strength.

***

High in the air, the hawk and eagle were gliding about aimlessly. Fluttershy had, as with all the creatures she'd taken in, indoctrinated them with the notion they should only hunt fish (because Fluttershy knew those were evil even if she couldn't prove it) or eat animals that had died nonviolently. Not in the mood for fish and with no scent of carrion in the air, they were mostly killing time and sulking. They'd been sulking for awhile now. It had hurt their pride deeply when a Colombia blue pegasus had not adopted them, and the occasional glimpses they got of that accursed flying tortoise or the sound of it's little helicopter motor just rubbed salt in the wound.

Having the senses if no longer the instincts of adept hunters, they heard Tank's screams far below them and recognized them immediately from when they'd occasionally bullied the reptile back when it had shared the experience of Fluttershy's benevolent captivity. Their hearing allowed them to pinpoint his location though a low hanging cloud that Dash hadn't been scheduled to clear up since it was away from Ponyville which obscured their view. The eagle smirked at the hawk. Whatever was happening to that cur, it was clearly in distress, so it would be a shame to miss. They dove as one to get a better look.

As soon as they'd cleared the cloud, they were flabbergasted to see that the stupid turtle was apparently trying to fish a  filly out of the Ponyville river. After a half second to gather their wits, Fluttershy's diligent training of them to feel compassion for all ponies kicked it. They dove like they'd been fired from a bow, and were at Tank's side before he even knew what was happening. Shoving the tortoise aside, they took careful hold of Scootaloo and hauled her effortlessly out of the water.

Then they were stymied. They had not the slightest clue where Ponyville Hospital or any hospital was located. Was she just short on oxygen? They looked around, trying to decide what to do.

***

Outside the library, Dash had been surprised to find Tank had not returned. In fact, she'd been expecting him to try and

pull some prank on her by maybe dropping the ball on her while she was looking around or something. Almost immediately she became concerned something had attacked her pet, and tore through the skies over to Ponyville River.

She'd almost reached the river at the same time she heard the combination of the eagle and hawk shrieks along with Tank's. Dropping down into the canyon, she saw the birds dragging Scootaloo through the water as Tank looked on and gasped. At the sight of her surrogate sister looking at least unconscious and possibly grievously hurt while well intentioned animals were handling her incorrectly, Dash's brain dumped a huge load of adrenalin into her blood stream. Almost before she herself knew what was happening, she was among Scootaloo's impromptu rescue team.

"Not like that! She might have a spinal injury!" When you crashed as often as Rainbow did, you couldn't help but learn some first aid. The hawk and eagle were briefly stupified. The fastest creature they'd ever seen was there, and talking to them! In their admiration, their grip on Scootaloo weakened so that the filly slipped away from them, dipping beneath the water. Dash gasped in response. She zoomed past the distracted birds and with a splash went beneath the water.

The animals had scarcely turned back around when Dash emerged from the water, flying upside down. She was cradling Scootalo on her stomach, her forelegs clamping her down to prevent any part of her moving in the event she had a fracture.

"Hang in there, Scoots," Dash said as she carefully flapped her wings while staying upside down to Ponyville Hospital . Zooming past the animals again, the hawk and eagle's mouths went agape at how fast Dash was going while flying upside down. They flew their fastest after her, but Dash was already a rainbow blur in the distance. Finally, Tank came after the four of them as fast as his rotor would allow, which was not particularly fast.

***

Inside Ponyville Hospital's waiting room 3, Dash jumped back up out of a chair after being told to sit down three times and resumed pacing.

"Now Rainbow, dear," Rarity said, being the first of her friends to arrive since she'd been closest to the hospital and had seen her pegasus friend fly like a bat into hell, "you'll not be helping anypony by working yourself up into a tizzy." Seconds later, Sweetie Belle was pacing the waiting room as well, impressionable filly that she was. By the time Fluttershy arrived, Rarity was pacing as well.

After another five minutes of pacing later, Nurse Redheart entered the waiting room.

"Mrs. Dash," she said with what sounded like a heavy heart, barely finishing before Dash's face was half a hoof from hers. "We did all we could for poor little Scootaloo..."

"No," Dash whimpered, her head dipping.

" ... which is why aside from a simple fracture of the right foreleg, she's fine. No evidence of brain damage or permanent  injuries. She's a very lucky little filly. You can visit her in Room 205 right now." Redheart finished sadly. Dash was already in Scootaloo's room while her relieved friends followed, with the exception of Fluttershy who paused at the nurse.

"Why did you say that so sadly?"

"After five years in this job, I can't turn it on or off anymore," Nurse Redheart sighed with a shrug.

***

"Great to see you're alright, Scoots!" Sweetie Belle practically screamed in her friend's face.

"Hopefully you'll be sure to be more careful next time," Rarity reproached kindly with closed eyes.

"Now, since you were brought in unconscious, we're going to keep you under observation for the next twenty-four hours

to monitor for potential brain bleeds and other unforeseen maladies..." the doctor told her. She continued talking as another filly popped up in front of her, seemingly from nowhere, wearing a press hat.

"Scootaloo! Ink Blot from the Free Foal Press! Would you care to make a statement on your near brush with death?"

From there what everypony had to say sort of merged together into a mass of noise. Scootaloo glanced from face to face to face trying to keep up, occasionally getting a word in edgewise. Only Dash remained silent. She seemed frozen by the sight of the her adopted little sister. Aside from a couple glances, she was almost forgotten by almost everypony else in the room. Then a minute passed, which was time enough for Dash to make her decision.

"... Which reminds me of the time that Sweetie was running along the roof and sh-" Rarity was saying.

"... Just like that time that Apple Bloom thought we could get out cutie marks in mountain climbing-" Sweetie Belle was saying.

"OUT!" Dash yelled out of nowhere. Everypony's attention snapped over to her then. "GET OUT! EVERYPONY BUT SCOOTALOO, OUT!" She stomped on each word, her eyes glaring daggers, her wings unfurled and her back arched like she was about to attack. The fillies scurried out. The other ponies slunk out under her withering glare or walked out politely if a little indignantly. After the last of them had left, closing the door on the way out, Dash turned to Scootaloo, still glaring. Scootaloo had shrunk back as if she was hoping she could hide from her angry surrogate big sister in her pillow.

"HOW COULD YOU DO SOMETHING SO DUMB!?" Dash yelled. Then she winked and all the anger seemed to drain out of her except for in her voice. Scootaloo caught on immediately and relaxed. "SERIOUSLY, YOU ARE REALLY JUST LUCKY THAT THOSE BIRDS, TANK AND I WERE THERE! WHY CAN'T YOU BE MORE CAREFUL!?"

"IT'S NOT MY FAULT!" Scootaloo yelled back as Dash walked over to her. She smiled, and it was hard to do that and not laugh. "THERE WAS A SQUIRREL THAT RAN OUT IN FRONT OF MY SCOOTER! WAS I SUPPOSED TO RUN IT OVER!"

"YOU SHOULD HAVE GONE AT A SPEED WHERE YOU COULD STOP IN TIME IN AN EMERGENCY! EVERY FILLY PEGASUS KNOWS THAT!" Dash carefully put her forehooves around Scootaloo. Then she started to squeeze. Scootaloo put her good foreleg around her and hugged Dash back.

"I'm so glad you're okay, I was so scared," Dash whispered quickly.

"WELL APPARENTLY YOU DON'T, RAINBOW CRASH!" Scootaloo yelled back before whispering. "Thank you so much for saving me!"

"OOOOOH, THAT IS NOT COOL, YOU LITTLE INGRATE!" Dash broke off the hug and took a step back. "Anytime, Sis! And when I told you not to fall into anymore rivers in the middle of the night, I didn't mean that it would be okay during the daytime."

"Y-YOU'RE N-NOT COOL!" Scootaloo yelled back, stuttering from the effort of not giggling in delight. She sighed then. "You know, I think you can let ponies see you give hugs. You didn't have to tell them to get out."

"I'M TOO COOL FOR YOU!" She cocked her head over to the door. She could just faintly hear scratches from it indicating ponies were listening. "You know I can't let just anypony see me give hug! My reputation could be ruined! But yeah, wish I didn't have to do that too. We should talk to somepony about it."

"HA!" Scootaloo yelled. "Fluttershy, maybe?"

"I'M GOING TO TAKE YOUR SCOOTER AWAY UNTIL YOU CAN SCOOT YOUR AGE!" Scootaloo's eyes went a little big at that. It sounded serious. "Maybe Twilight, seems like more something she'd know."

"YOU'RE NOT MY MOM! YOU CAN'T TAKE MY THINGS!" Scootaloo's head hung a little. "Seriously, please dont!"

"I CAN, I WILL!" DASH sighed. "Well, now I've got to for all those ponies that heard me. Sorry, wasn't thinking."

"Ms. Dash," the hospital administrator and thus the bravest employee in the building said as he opened the door and came in, " I understand you're upset, but you do not have the right to bully staff and visitors like-" His lecture to the colombia blue pegasus was cut short by the sound of loud scratching at the window.

"Hey!" Dash yelled after glancing out the window, "It's those birds that helped to save you! They must WANT TO CHECK ON YOU SCOOTS!" She remembered half way through the sentence that she was supposed to still be angry. She walked over to open the window and let them in, but was intercepted by the administrator.

"No: We don't allow animals in, especially not birds with their lice-ridden feathers. Anyway, we'll need you to leave while we run an EKG test on Scootaloo," Dash was about to protest, but decided that actually made sense. She turned back to Scootaloo.

"I'M GOING TO GO SAY THANKS TO THEM FOR YOU AND I'LL COME BACK LATER! DON'T BREAK ANY MORE BONES WHILE I'M AWAY!" Scootaloo giggled at the dark bit of humor, but then scoffed. having remembered she was supposed to be mad as Dash shot out of the room. After she left, the many visitors shuffled back into the room, several of them trying not to laugh at how transparent Dash's charade had been.

***

Outside the hospital, Dash flew straight to the birds.

"Hey, Scootaloo's doing great! Thanks a ton for helping her out!" They shrieked joyously. Flying to either side of her, they began to nuzzle the object of their worship. Dash's feelings about that were pretty mixed, but she definitely wished she hadn't just heard that birds tend to have lice. Still, it would be pretty uncool to push animals that had helped saved Scootaloo.

"Eh... yeah, okay..." Dash said as their heads rubbed on her neck and cheeks. "Geez, everypony's being touchy-feely as heck today." Just when Rainbow was becoming uncomfortable enough to consider pushing the birds away, she heard Tank coming. Impulsively, she flew over to her pet, leaving the eagle and hawk to accidentally lean into each other, nuzzling. They moved apart in supreme embarrassment.

  :"She's doing great, Tank! She's already up and they'll let her out tomorrow." Tank smiled in his usual slow style. "We'll have to go get her scooter, cause I said something kinda dumb, and then we can go play ca-" Dash was cut off by a shriek from the hawk from right behind her. She turned to see them only hooves away. Dash guessed then that, in fact, they weren't really too concerned about her filly friend, and more interested in approval from her. She did like fans, but this was getting a little too clingy for her taste. Still, they had helped save Scootaloo...

"Hi, uh, again. This is my pet Tank and..." Dash trailed off when she saw that the birds were glaring at Tank, and he didn't look comfortable either. Then she made the mental connection. "OH, you're those two awesome birds that were competing against Tank to become my pet!"  Their faces brightened smugly at being called awesome, and Tank was slightly miffed by that.

"Well, Tank and I were gonna play catch in a bit," Dash said. The birds got in her face, squawking and imitating catching as best as bird could. "Oh, you want in too? Ooookaay... Be right back." Moments later Dash was off collecting the abandoned scooter. While she was away, the birds of prey and the turtle exchanged hostile but calm stares.

***

The problems with having creatures with sharp beaks and even sharper talons try to catch a green ball probably don't need to be explained to you, but everyone involved made a sincere effort at it. It still resulted in about eight seconds of play before the hawk's talons had popped the ball like it was no tougher than a soap bubble. Trying to cover, the Hawk still tossed the scraps of rubber it was holding in Dash's direction, which a light breeze picked up and sent fluttering away.

"Worst game idea since dodgerocks," Dash muttered to Tank. The slightly relieved turtle smiled and nodded in appreciation of the birds of prey sort of being mocked. Dash looked over at the birds. "Well, that was, uh, fun. We're gonna-" In a clop of the hooves, the birds were back in Dash's face, squawking enthusiastically. Then they flapped away a bit. The hawk mimed swooping past the eagle, whom then cut the air with his wing. They looked expectantly at Dash after that. She glanced over at Tank in incomprehension.

"Uh, is it bigger than a bread box? I- OH, you wanna race?" There was more enthusiastic nodding from the birds. "Yeah. Yeah! Haven't had a good race in awhile! Sounds fun! You want to do sprints or endurance?" Looking from Rainbow to the birds manic at receiving her attention, Tank lost a little bit of green in his face.

***

It turned out that the hawk and eagle wanted to do both endurance and sprint races and lots of both. They flew from Cloudsdale to Cantelot. They soared over Rainbow Falls and around Canterlot Falls. They dove beneath the treeline of the Froggy Bottom Bog and swooped over the Rambling Rock Ridge. While Dash won all the initial races, as time wore on, she couldn't resist an urge to show off doing things such as letting the birds have a head start so she could have the satisfaction of blasting past them or to slow down and show boat. This resulted in her losing one race to the hawk. She felt like kicking herself for letting that happen, and of course immediately demanded a rematch.

The fun started to drain away after Dash noticed the sun was beginning to set. She felt that was enough racing for one day, and the novelty of racing two awesome predators was wearing off. Plus, she'd told Scootaloo she was going to visit later, and in this case "later" seemed to imply another time in the day during visiting hours. When they had finished something like their tenth endurance race, Dash felt that was enough.

"Okay, good race," she said while the three of them were hovering over Ponyville, "That'll be enough for today, wanna go with me to visit Scoota-" Once again, the birds were right in her face screeching, squawking, and shaking their heads. It was very clear to the mildly startled pegasus that they wanted to keep racing. In fact, their eagerness to race was almost unsettling.

"Alright, alright!" Dash said, pushing them away gently. "One last race around Ponyville, okay?" They nodded wildly, flew a proper distance away, and flapped in place, waiting for Dash to join them. Dash groaned, glancing down at the hospital. Still, she owed these birds. And what would one more race hurt? Fast as she was, she'd be done with plenty of time to visit Scoots.

***

Eight races later, Dash glanced down at the Ponyville clock tower and saw that it was fifteen minutes past the end of visiting hours. She growled at that, as the last five races had each involved her two feathered "friends" getting in her face to make sure she flew one last race with them. She'd barely finished growling when once more they returned to in front of her face, squawking and gesturing for her to race again.

"That's enough racing! I got other stuff to do! Leave me alone!" That shut the flying pests up. Dash prepared to dive for the hospital when she got a glance at their faces again. They looked deeply wounded by what Dash had said, on the verge of tears. Dash couldn't help but feel a bit of regret, and then, for about the twentieth time that day, mental images of the pair holding Scootaloo popped up in her mind.

"Hey, don't be down! I, uh..." Dash rubbed the back of her head as the bird's looked up at her expectantly, their heads still hung, "How about we race some more tomorrow? Okay?" With excessive eagerness, they nodded at Rainbow, causing her to have to draw back a little bit to avoid being accidentally pecking her a dozen or so times.

"Great. How about right here tomorrow at two?" They nodded again. "Well, I'm gonna go see if I can visit Scootaloo. See ya!" Dash dove towards Ponyville Hospital. The birds of prey watched her go, then smiled at each other and grasped each other's feet in a talon shake. It went on much longer than a normal talon shake would.

***

Since Dash figured she wouldn't be very welcome in the hospital after her outburst and maybe some lingering resentment over the book burglary, she decided not to try and convince nurses or anyone to let her visit. After a few minutes of pressing her snout against windows to see if Scootaloo was asleep her, she found it. She wasn't asleep at all, but sitting up, her good foreleg and chin resting on her knees, sadness and disappointment seeming to radiate from her. Dash couldn't relate every well. Her stay in the hospital had just been boring, and it had been awhile since she'd really felt alone and let down.

Dash tapped softly on the window. Scootaloo started, and then smiled when she recognized her visitor. Dash waved meekly, embarrassed in spite of herself that she'd taken so long to stop by. Scootaloo returned the wave, wincing a little because she'd used the wrong foreleg. Dash saw the wince but knew better than to show concern or regret. Scootaloo still wanted to appear tough around her and probably would prefer thinking that Dash hadn't noticed that pain got to her. Dash then pressed her front left hoof against the window and Scootaloo pointed her good hoof at Dash's, a long distance hoofbump.

A moment later, Dash sighed and then had to go. You didn't have to be touching the ground to be trespassing as far as Ponyville hospital was concerned. Scootaloo leaned back into her pillow, content. She was asleep in a few minutes.

***

Outside her home, Dash was only half pleased to see Tank waiting for her, with the other half being embarrassed as he looked a little annoyed at having been seemingly forgotten about.

"Oooh, sorry Tank. Lost track of time." She lifted the rock she had tied to a big balloon outside her home which she kept the key under and unlocked the door. When she looked back at Tank, he took the opportunity to get a surprise nuzzle in on her. Dash smiled and nuzzled back.

"SKREEEEEEE!" tore through the air a few dozen hooves behind them, causing the pair to look over in surprise. It was the hawk and eagle from earlier that day swooping towards them, looking for a moment like they were going to attack. Then they stopped short, glaring but not on the attack. Not that Tank wasn't reassured enough that he didn't hide Dash and then pull his head and limbs inside his shell. Dash would have been annoyed by them again and maybe angry, but having recently revisited Scootaloo and having been in a good mood previously, she was in the mood to be appreciative to them again for helping to save her surrogate sister.

"Uh, hi guys! Great to see ya," Dash said. That seemed to improve their moods a bit, for they flapped a bit less frantically and their faces seemed a bit happier. Without even noticing, Dash had pushed the door open. Seeming to take this as an invitation, they flew into Dash's home. Since Dash hadn't turned the lightning yet, in the darkness they went straight through a near wall, leaving whisps behind them. Then they

"Alright, I guess you can spend the night," Dash grumbled.

***

"There you go, bit of hoofy unicorn magic that lets non-Pegasi stand on clouds," Dash said as she attached the gifts from Twilight to the birds that thought of her as their owner. "So, what to do now that I've got some guests? Let's see..." All of Rainbow's music was more meant for a working out than for hanging out and everybody was already kinda tired if not sleepy. All of her books were about Daring Do, and of course Tank and the birds had already read all those several times. At a loss for anything else, Dash decided she'd keep up playing at being a good host and make her new friends something to eat and drink.

"Okay, I'm guessing they won't want apples, carrots, hay, grass, or any of that good stuff," Dash mumbled as she looked through her fridge. Then she thought she saw something and decided to ask about it. "Would you like shakes made out of raw eggs and energy drinks? Eggs are the closest things I've got to meat."

Actually, they didn't just wait. They resented and they fumed. While Dash was away, they studied the one that had wrongfully been adopted instead of them. The hawk slightly more, but the eagle's hate alone would have been enough to burn. It had been an infuriating humiliation to lose to the turtle before, to think that this green, sluggish, cowardly wretch had been judged superior to them. But to see it nuzzling their idol had risen the bird's blood from "boiling" when they thought about it to "boiling over" as they looked at Rainbow's pet.

"Guys?" Rainbow called, expecting some kind of response. Tank was certainly not blind to their hostility and not feeling particularly brave or territorial, and thus her backed into the farthest corner under the hateful gaze of the unwanted guests. When their glares did not abate as time went on, and in fact they began to tremble as if they were barely containing rage, Tank discerned that would not be enough. He began to slink along the cloud wall towards the kitchen. The shell was good for protection, but those claws looked like they could reach him from the farthest he could retract into his shell, so he'd really appreciate whatever protection he could get from Dash.

Being more instinctive hunters than thoughtful creatures despite all Fluttershy's influence, the sight of cowering prey compelled the birds to swoop at Tank, claws out and screeching, intending to kill. Tank's head ducked in along with all his limbs in time to avoid a potentially fatal slash. Rage and frustration at Tank's lead to them clawing savagely, almost blindly at Tank's shell, probably the only thing that kept them from sticking talons into his head and practically scalping him.

"Hey!" Rainbow yelled, the sound of their idol's fury cutting through the red mental haze of anger. The pair turned towards her, practically stupefied to be caught having lost control like that and having angered the most important creature in Equestria to them right then. "No, that is not cool! No one gets to hurt Tank! Get out of my house, now!"

The birds stared at her, then looked at each other, and then back to her in confusion. What had just happened? They barely realized they still had their talons on Tank's shell, the hawk having the tip of a razor sharp talon millimeters from Tank's left eye. Dash's wing's unfurled in her impatience.

"I said get out!" Dash was on the birds in a second, pushing them to the front door. They were halfway out when they started flailing wildly in her hooves and screeching again. "I never want to see you again! We're even, got it!? And if I ever see you try to hurt Tank again, you're chow mein!" Dash tossed them outside, leaving the pair to continue wondering what had happened as Dash slammed the door shut.

The birds were slow to resume fury, but when they did, they tore at the door for minutes on end and screeched like hens trapped in a house with a fox. How could Tank have manipulated them out of their rightful position as Rainbow's pet a second time? For minutes, they only became more manic and shrill, desperate to get back and have another shot at giving the false pet what was coming to him. On and on it went.

***

"Tank? You okay, dude?" Dash was not exactly a pet psychologist, but she was as comforting as she could manage with Tank, who was quivering inside his shell after the attack. "I'm sorry I let them in, I should have known they were seriously messed up birds." Dash wasn't sure if she should fly and try to chase the birds away as they went nuts on her door but decided that it was like how her parents had told her back when she was a filly that it was best to someone angry get it out of their system and flap away instead of making power plays and giving them more to be mad about. The fact that the sound of the angry birds outside seemed to die down after a few minutes followed by what sounded like the pair flying away.

Rainbow and Tank usually wouldn't have been the type to need to do this, but Dash let Tank spend the night in bed with her because he remained in a seemingly shaken state. It was hard to tell since his shakes were so slow. Anxiety about the incident and the day in general kept the pair up later than usual, especially Tank, but they both drifted off eventually.

***

In the morning, Rainbow and Tank did their usual morning routine. Pushups in and out of shell, jumping bucks, etc. They had a good breakfast of apples and lettuce, brushed their teeth, and looked forward to a great day. Dash went to collect Scootaloo's scooter while Tank went to the front day to collect Dash's mail.

"I think I know how to get this back to Scoots right after she gets out o-" Rainbow was cut off by the sound of the door slamming behind her and then the sight of Tank cowering in front of her. She looked back at the door.

"No way," she said flatly. But when she went up to and opened the door, she saw there was indeed a way. For the hawk and eagle were staring right her. Glaring, actually. They'd clearly been glaring at her house all night, for their eyes were so bloodshot even the pupils had some red in them.They were standing on a cloud, able to do so thanks to the trinkets Dash had given them last night, and hunched like buzzards. Perhaps because they thought at least one of the animals in the house was already dead meat.

"Why you big mean... " Dash leapt into the air and flew towards them, ready to either give the pair a good chasing off or a good thrashing if they stood their air. The birds didn't quite go either way. Instead, they slipped their trinkets off and ducked down into the cloud. It being a solid nimbus cloud, they managed to give Rainbow the slip in it, though she made sure it wasn't easy for them.

A few minutes later, Dash popped back out of the cloud with a growl of frustration. Two dumb crazy birds weren't going to get away with threatening her and Tank! She'd put a stop to whatever-

Had they just led her away from her house so that they could hurt him?

Dash bolted back home and was deeply relieved to find Tank perfectly alright and no sign of her new enemies. As she tried to think of what to do with her day in light of this new threat, a question struck her.

Would this be a matter for the Cloudsdale Police Department or Animal Control?

***

An hour later, Dash was right outside Fluttershy's Cottage, giving Fluttershy the scooter. Tank was right behind her, both having decided it was better for him to be accompanied by her at all times for at least awhile.

"Okay, here's how it's gonna work," Dash whispered although nopony was nearby to hear them or care. "You give Scootaloo the scooter when she leaves the hospital, but tell her you went to my place and swiped it. Make it sound like you're being all secretive, but make sure at least a couple ponies can hear you. That way, everypony will know I tried to take it away from her and didn't give it back, but Scootaloo will still have it. Got it?"

"... O...K," Fluttershy said, as Dash had known she would. She'd selected her to do the deed mostly because she knew Fluttershy would be the most willing of all pegasi to go along with anything. "But Rainbow, won't you be there when Scootaloo leaves the hospital?"

"I don't think I should. It might not be safe." From there, Dash brought Fluttershy up to speed on the birds of prey. Several times, Fluttershy put her hooves over her mouth in worry.

"So my suspicion was right; it was them that made all those drawings of Tank on the side of the aviary. I thought those might be by some misunderstood fillies that didn't like your pet, so I didn't confront them. You might want to see them, they're-"

"I'm actually pretty sure I don't," Dash interrupted with a shake of her head.

"You're probably right."

"Got any info on these crazy conniving carnivores that can help me stop them? Like, habits, hang outs, fighting techniques," Dash mimed a couple martial arts moves in front of Fluttershy as she illustrated the point which were of course required at the Wonderbolt Academy while Fluttershy stared in bewilderment. "Weak spots, tragic histories I can exploit, something to get inside their heads. Anything?"

"I don't think so. I didn't have to fight them much." Fluttershy scratched the back of her head. Then she brightened quickly when something occurred to her. "Mr. Hawk is ticklish! Perhaps, if you could pluck one of his feathers, you could..." Fluttershy saw Dash's mouth curl into a deeply unimpressed frown. When Fluttershy looked away in embarrassment, Dash sighed.

"Sorry, Fluttershy. The whole thing's just got me so angry." Fluttershy nodded emphatically.

"Understood. Do you really think it's safe to have Scootaloo by herself?"

"No, she should be with somepony." Dash thought for a second. "Tell her... to stay indoors somewhere. Those birds probably want to hurt Tank more than her, but we're not taking any chances!" Fluttershy caught the implication of that.

"I'll make sure she has a nice visit." She said with a sigh.

"Great! Thanks, Fluttershy! Now, the early pegasus is about to get the early birds!"

"Huh?" Dash blinked and then blushed.

"It sounded better in my head." With that, Tank took a tight hold on Dash, and then the pair blasted into the air leaving behind a rainbow streak.

While all that had been happening, Mr. Hawk and Mr. Eagle sneaked into Fluttershy's tool shed. They swiped certain needed items, scratched the eyes out of one of their drawings of Tank on the side of the shed again, and then took to the sky keeping a comfortable distance from their quarry and her false pet.

***

Inside Ponyville Library, Spike looked from the gem that had just been put into his hand to Rainbow who'd just given it to him to Tank at her feet.

"Everypony knows you're the best pet sitter in Equestria, Spike!" Dash insisted. "While I get those birds, I want to make sure Tank's as safe as possible!"

"Well, thanks for saying so Dash, but..." Spike trailed off, glancing over at Twilight Sparkle in the hope she'd bail him out.

"While I'm sure Spike's very flattered you feel that way, isn't this more something you should be asking the Cloudsdale Guard to take care of?"

"Nope. They're too scared. Said it's too dangerous to try to fight off a hawk and eagle." Dash flapped a few hooves into the air then to better mime out what she was going to say. "I don't blame 'em, and you wouldn't either. Remember these birds? They've got claws that look like they can tear through steel with a single swipe. Beaks that look like they could punch a hole in a brick wall from like unicorn horn through bread, swooping down at--"

*ting* *ting*

That was the sound of the gem Spike had tossed to the ground bouncing off the floor. He'd run and hid too quickly for his feet to make audible contact with the floor. Rainbow and Twilight looked at where he'd been standing in embarrassment.

"Best pet sitter my flank," Dash muttered. She was about to usher Tank outside when Twilight put a hoof on her shoulder.

"Despite how you managed to accidentally spook Spike, we'll take care of Tank. I promise you that even if they somehow manage ingress to the library, I'll get them with a bit of horn magic." Twilight made a wicked little smile and made her horn glow threateningly. Dash returned the grin.

***

Outside, Dash looked around for the right direction to start her search. She thought the better of it after a moment: she needed to be airborne. That was where she did her best thinking. She flapped to above the library and had another look around. She instantly ruled out the direction of Cloudsdale. They definitely wouldn't be lurking where there were plenty of other pegasi around in case she called for help. She shook her head at the idea of going over by Canterlot for the same reason. Probably not over by Froggy Bottom bog, where there'd be the stench of swamp stink at this time of day. Rainbow groaned: The skies of Equestria sometimes seemed so big.

Dash sniffed. What was that new and powerful smell? Oh horseapples, it was chlorofo-

The eagle's talons grabbed her shoulders in a death grip while the hawk slipped dropped the cloth in front of her mouth and then pulled it back like tying a noose around. He tied it to her head in a moment and then joined his partner in kidnapping in holding the bucking mare's shoulders. Dash fought as well as you'd expect, but her new pets had the drop on her so completely and Fluttershy's chloroform was so strong that she was unconscious in only a few seconds, still managing to twist a few times and almost throw her attackers off.

Having caught their prey like the ace hunters they were, the eagle took the cloth from her face as the hawk retrieved Fluttershy's rope. Then they began to fly her high into the air where they'd explain things in a manner that would persuade the most stubborn pegasus in Equestria the reality of the situation.

Down in the library, Twilight stood over her anxious new guest trying to think of what they should do.

"So, you wanna play a turtle game?" Twilight asked. Tank looked up at her incredulous, an expression that Twilight mistook for enthusiasm and thus she tried to think of something. She guessed peek-a-boo would be much too easy for a turtle. She didn't have any balls about to play catch with. She assumed that Super Mare-io Kart might be insensitive  what with all the weaponized shells in it.

While she pondered, Tank looked through one of the high windows near the door to Twilight's balcony. He saw the eagle and hawk carrying the recently ambushed Rainbow into the air, her looking distressingly limp.

"Heeessssss!" Tank said as he pointed up.

"Can turtles read? Wait, no, Tank's a tortoise, isn't he? Those definitely can't," Twilight said, too lost in her thoughts. Then she heard the hissing noise and looked down. She followed where Tank was pointing up to the balcony just in time to miss the birds carrying Rainbow away. "No, tank, we can't use the telescope. It's outside where it's not safe for you."

"Heeeeeesssssss!" Tank repeated.

"Sheesh, you can use it all day next time you come over," Twilight replied indignant.

***

A few minutes later, the familiar feel of high altitude winds on her face brought Dash back around. She blinked and smacked her lips. She was gong to stretch her wings and legs when- oh Celestia, they were tied up! She was completely tied up! With no leverage, she could strain all she wanted against the ropes and not feel them give at all until next week. Nevertheless she gave struggling a game try, managing only to make herself rock and squirm helplessly. She remembered her Wonderbolt Academy training and immediately looked down. She was at least a mile and a half in the air without a potentially fall-breaking cloud anywhere below.

"Skree!" screeched the eagle. She looked up, and with a strain of her neck could see that the pair of them were holding the rope, looking down at her sternly. Rainbow being Rainbow, her fear gave way to cockiness.

"So there you are. you sneaky, dirty fighters!" Dash growled. They smiled ruefully at that. They would have expected nothing less from the pony worthy of owning them. Dash knew better than tell them to let her go or something from the Daring Do stories, so she tried going a different tack. "What do you want from me?"

"Skreee!" the hawk shrieked. Dash was taken aback at that.

"You don't seriously mean..." Rainbow said, stopping when she saw them unruffle their feathers and reach behind their backs. They brought them back around to reveal that they were wearing two of Fluttershy's leashes and collars, rare things in Equestria but still recognizable as symbols.

"Skreeeee, skree skree," the eagle shrieked threateningly. To emphasize the point. the pair of birds loosened their holds on her briefly, letting it slip through their grips before seizing it tightly again.

"Woah!" Dash yelled as the whiplash hit her midsection when her descent was stopped. After another glance down, she steeled her nerves, and looked back up at her tormentors.

"Skreeeeech?" the hawk enquired.

"No." Dash proclaimed. "I'll never adopt you. I already have my pet, and it's Tank. It will always be Tank, you big chickens!" They blinked at that and looked at each other. They'd expected courage from their owner, but this was suicidal foolhardiness.

"Skree?!" the eagle shrieked in disbelief.

"No, I'm not being stubborn!" Dash raised her chin proudly. "I'm being loyal. The fact you can't tell the difference is a big part of the reason why you'll never, ever be my pets!" They really shook their heads and clucked in consternation at that.

"Look, you jive turkeys, you going to leave me hanging all day or you gonna drop me and get it over with!?" Rainbow glared arrogantly up at them then. She had their number now. She knew they weren't going to drop her. She might be completely tied up, but she was in charge of the situation.

The hawk and eagle did the bird of prey equivalent of sighing. This clearly wasn't going to work. They'd need to land and think not only of some way to apologize, but impre-

"Hold on, Rimbow Dish!" came a voice Dash recognized, "I'm coming to save you!"

"Oh, no..." Dash said under her breath.

Ditzy-Doo came clumsily darting across the sky wearing the closest thing she had to a war face. The hawk and eagle were almost as scared as Dash at her approach. She bowled into the pair of birds, hoofs swinging. The hawk and eagle's attentions being torn between evading blows from a well-meaning pegasus and holding up another one, their grip on the rope couldn't help but weaken a bit as they flapped and dodged about. Dash could feel their grips slipping as if the rope was a part of her body.

"Derpy, stop trying to save me! It was alright!"

"Don't worry, Rimbow! I've almost got 'em!" Ditzy swung a lucky/unlucky blow and caught the eagle and hawk square on the beaks. That loosened their holds completely, and Dash began to plummet down.

"AAAAAUUGGHHH!" Dash yelled without a shred of dignity or her old confidence. She was not used to falling without any ability to fly at all and the sensation scared her as much as it would have any Earth pony.

"SKRRREEECCCHHH!" the hawk and eagle shrieked. They made to dive and try to catch the rope, but Ditzy threw their dazed heads into a headlock.

"No you don't!" Ditzy proclaimed.

***

Scootaloo was scooting along Ponyville, her broken leg propped up by her scooter handle. She'd found it easier than she expected to escape Fluttershy's cottage, what with only needing to ask for a few minutes by herself. From what she remembered seeing that hawk and eagle from the hospital room window, they were some tough-looking birds, so Dash might just need her help. The fact anything was more fun than staying in Fluttershy's cottage was only like a tenth of the reason she'd sneaked out. Right now, she was near the ramp that Dash had once saved a foal on, eyes and ears peeled for anything.

"Auuuuuugggghhh!" She heard faintly. That sounded like anything. In fact, that sounded like Dash. She looked up and saw the little Colombian blue dot in the air that was Rainbow, which was growing quickly. She looked around below her. Dash would be hitting the ground very, very hard in less than ten seconds. She didn't see any pegasi that could fly up to catch her, and no unicorns seemed to be forming a magical landing pad or anything beneath her.

Scootaloo's eyes fell on the ramp then. Her rational brain shut down at that second. Instinct and stupid, stupid love took over then. She began scooting as hard as she could.

***

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUGGGGGH!" Dash continued to yell, about all she could say with her cheeks flapping. She was a cruelly aerodynamic figure with all her appendages tied to her.

She would be a greasy smear on the ground in nine seconds. Eight. Seven.

***

Scootaloo had never had the nerve to use the ramp and less than a wing and a prayer that this would work. Her cheeks were flapping as well, though not nearly so much as Dash's. She narrowed her eyes from the wind and grit her teeth. As she reached the end of the ramp and went flying into the air, she had her first thought since she'd seen the ramp.

"What am I doing!?!"

Six.

***

Five. Four.

Dash's continued to struggle vainly against the ropes, still making preciously little headway against them when she saw an orange and purple blur coming up at her. Coming together at the speeds they were, Scootaloo was almost at her before she recognized her surrogate sister.

"Scoo--" was all she got out before Scootaloo collided with her front hooves first. She began to tumble across Dash, and having no other way to grasp her hero, she bit down. She caught one of the ropes encircling Dash.

Three.

Looking at the rapidly approaching ground, Scootaloo's brain dumped enough adrenalin into her blood stream that it became about 80% proof. With that much muscle power going into her jaw, even her blunt equine teeth had  enough power to bite through the rope like it was made of cotton candy although as tight as it had been it unwrapped like a broken rubber band..

Two.

Dash's wings and legs, having been pushing so hard against the rope before, exploded out from the unwound rope as if they were spring-loaded.

One.

Dash flapped as hard as she could. She threw every last thing into that flap, and it sent shockwaves through the air that would have knocked any pony beneath her off their hooves.

Zero.

Dash and Scootaloo stopped a few hooves from the ground and began to rise quickly immediately after.

"--taloo." Dash said. She blinked, surprised that she wasn't dead. Then relief began to surge through her, hitting her almost as hard as the adrenalin had Scootaloo. She laughed, the laugh gradually becoming manic. She felt Scootaloo legs wrapping around her neck, and feeling a wave of giddiness, placed her hooves firmly against them and then blasted into the air.

Scootaloo's scooter, having no one to save it, crashed into the ground and exploded into a pillar of fire and smoke.

"Woo! Yahoo! Hahahahahahahahah!" Dash laughed and screamed as she jetted, looped, cartwheeled, spun, and made figure eights in the sky. It was quite the impromptu rainbow airshow above Ponyville, too erratic for any sonic rainbooms but filling the sky with color almost as well.

Eventually Dash got control of herself enough to fly down to the ground. Scootaloo jumped off, but then Dash caught her in mid air and threw her into a bear hug, her wings wrapped around her as well.

In awe of the air show, Ditzy's hold on the birds had loosened. They broke free and began her grasp and began to fly down, hoping to apologize properly to Dash.

"Scoots, that was- I was- you- should be so dead but- squeeee!"  It hurt Scootaloo's front leg a bit the way Dash was hugging her, but she wouldn't have let that spoil the moment for all the world . She was too busy nuzzling Dash's chest and savoring the feeling. "That save was so awesome, it made ME more awesome just for being the one being saved!"

"Dash!" Scootaloo said in a mock whinny voice with a giggle, "everypony that sees us will think we're being softies!"

"Let them! In fact..." Dash looked around. There were indeed a few confused, amused, or impresssed ponies looking at them, including a couple pegasuses that had scrambled way too late to save her, Fluttershy among them. "I love h- no, I wuv Scootaloo like she was my own little sister! Better! Scootaloo is best sister!" Then she gave Scootaloo a powernuzzle, which she returned in kind.

"Aaaaaahhh," the crowd said as one, Applejack among other ponies that had joined by then.

"But never do anything like that again. Way too dangerous," Dash whispered to Scootaloo.

"I love you too, Rainbow Dash."

"I'll do anything for you. Name it," Dash whispered. Scootaloo looked over in the direction of the fire.

"A new scooter would be great." Scootaloo said as her old scooter burned in the distance. Dash chuckled a little bit at the smallness of the request.

"SKRRRRREEE!" The hawk and eagle shrieked from above, expressing their pleasure that Dash was alright. That stopped her chuckle dead. Dash didn't look up at them. She merely gently, carefully set Scootaloo on the ground.

"Be right back," Dash said cooly, "I've got to go inflict a Rainbow Bash. You'll want to look out." Rainbow lifted off then after her feathery adversaries, her red irises glowing like lava and her teeth in a sneer that actually literally could kill if looked directly into.

The eagle and hawk bumped into each flapping wildly to try and get away before they went in opposite directions.  All the sharp beaks and talons in Equestria wouldn't have made them feel safe against the Rainbow missile that was coming for them. They'd barely flown a dozen hooves apart when Dash caught the hawk. Clamping her forelegs around it, she spun him like he was her partner in an air ballet and then flung him into the eagle. He'd barely struck his target in the back when Dash had caught up with them. She bucked the pair for all she was worth, sending them plummeting down into the earth where she'd been standing with Scootaloo seconds ago. Dash had told her to look out, though, so she dodged easily as the birds hit the ground and were dazed by the impact.

"That's step one." Dash said in the air, popping the tendons in her forehooves. "And for step two..." Dash dove down, her hooves outstretched to continue the bashing. The rainbow bolt of pain was stopped from reaching its target by a veritable wall of ponies popping up in front of her.

"Rainbow, stop!" they all yelled or minor variations on that. Rainbow tried her best to stop but ended up crashing into the Equestrians anyway. But they served their purpose of keeping her from hitting the birds. Afterwards, Dash was not feeling in an apologetic mood, flapping back into the air.

"Why are you guy protecting those mangy buzzards?" Dash asked in anger, her forehooves on her hips.

"Dash, please! They don't deserve to be hurt like that!" Fluttershy shouted timidly.

"You crazy? They tried to hurt Tank and they dropped me from miles in the sky!" Dash shuffled side to side, looking for an opening through all the ponies and not finding it.

"They're under control now! Not gonna do any good to keep hurtin' 'em! Yer better than that!" Applejack offered. As always, an appeal to Rainbow's ego got through, and she began to have second thoughts. Out of the corner of her left eye, she saw Scootaloo looking up at her in fearful befuddlement, shocked to see her idol resort to such savage violence, which settled the matter. Dash crossed her forelegs in front of her, hunched over, and pouted.

"Hmpf," was all she had to say.

Of course, the ponies weren't just protecting the hawk and eagle so that they could recover and have a second shot at Rainbow. Pieces of Fluttershy's rope had been collected and used to bind them. From there their claws and beaks were placed in cork, although the pair were so dazed and demoralized that they were hardly going to lash out even if that step weren't taken. Finally they were placed on the backs of some tough pegasi to be taken to Ponyville Animal Control. As they were being carried through the crowd, their eyes wandered up to Dash's. She sneered again.

"You got lucky my friends were here, pets!" The hawk and eagle had a glimmer of hope in response to that, but couldn't shake the feeling there was a hint of sarcasm in her tone.

Dash looked down to Scootaloo then.

"Let's blow this bleeding heart stand, Scoots. Wanna go check out Rainbow Falls?"

"Yeah!" Dash hoisted her sis onto her back and then shot through the air towards the falls, thinking of how she'd tell every pegasi there how she had the coolest adopted sister ever.

Meanwhile, Fluttershy turned her attention to Applejack, needing some honest advice.

"I don't know if I can take them back in. It doesn't seem like it's providing them a healthy environment, and I wouldn't want to not allow Rainbow over." She sighed then. "This happens sadly often when I take in predators, particularly ones that have an ego about it. It's especially bad for the little critters, but-"

"Sayyyy...." Applejack interrupted. A gleam entered her eyes along with a rather slimy smile. "Ah might just have an idea for this little predator problem."

***

Six Weeks Later

The last of a now rather small group of squirrels fled from the last of the Sweet Apple Acres trees. Too full to give proper chase, the hawk and eagle alighted on a tree and burped contentedly. Whatever insecurity they'd felt over not becoming the pets of the fastest pegasus in Equestria was long since buried by the seemingly endless smorgasbord of squirrel meat and other orchard pests. This was the life.

Down at the base of the tree they'd perched upon, Applejack and Apple Bloom munched cheerfully at apples, pleased by the especially good harvest they'd brought in with fewer varmints to take their crop. At the tree next to them Rainbow Dash, Tank, and Scootaloo were also happily enjoying apples of their own. A few hooves from Scootaloo her Scootamax 3000 shone in the afternoon sun, still looking as new as the day Rainbow Dash had bought it for her.

THE END