“Human mating?!” I practically screamed.

“I need to know how you humans...mate with another” Twilight said calmly.

Great! now I have to give her the birds and the bees crap! I sat on the couch thinking of some way say to tell her about mating in an easy fashion. Of course there is nothing ‘easy’ about sex but I may as well give it my best.

“S-So...when the man wants to...y-you know...he puts his thing in the women's...I CAN'T DO THIS!”
I jumped out off of the couch and started pacing. Walking back and forth I tried to think up a better way to go about explaining this to her.

Maybe I could draw it out –no! That would be considered pornography. I could probably write it out but I’m not that good of a writer. Agh! This is so frustrating. My cheeks were probably full flush by now because my face felt like the front of a furnace.

I was sweating profusely and my hands were getting balmy. And to add to it all I probably looked like I had Parkinson’s with the way I was shaking.

Twilight noticing the state I was in tried to calm me down. “Josh... It’s ok, all I need to know is how humans mate, it’s a natural thing. Please.”

I looked at her, my cheeks ablaze. “Trust me...it’s a little complicated... human mating is just like...what you ponies’ do...THE END!”

I sat back on the couch and sighed, this is not going to be easy. My hands rubbed my eyes in attempt to alleviate the stress…nope, still there. Opening my eyes I found a smiling Twilight in front of me.

"Josh... would it be better if I would ask you on a date...just as friends of course!"

My eyes practically bulged out of their sockets. "WHAT! You're asking me out on a date hoping that it would help explain how human mating goes...and with a pony?!"

"Well... yes!"

"I'm sorry Twi... but I have to say no on this one"

I jumped out off of the couch and headed upstairs to my room. I laid on my bed thinking to myself, ‘Just when everything was settled...now I have to explain human mating to Twi...and she asked me to go on a date with her, but I’m just not ready for that kind of stuff.

It is getting late though. I'll sleep on it and maybe I'll have the mating talk after a conversation in the morning.

*********

The next morning I was getting ready for the mating question and... the date. I really just wanted to get this over with, but first I'm going to take a nice, hot shower and get changed!

*Third Pony View*

Twilight was trotting back and forth. "I hope he’s not mad or anything! I shouldn't have asked him about human mating!"

At this spike walked in, "Twilight, I'm sure he's not mad or anything about what you ask him. What did you ask him about anyway?"

Twilight came to a halt, looking at him. "Nothing spike... I'll tell you when you're older"

Before she had a chance to get worked up again, there was knocking at her door. Opening it she was greeted by her one and only rainbow friend.

"Rainbow, what are you doing here?!"

Rainbow Dash smiled and replied, "Well duh, it’s the weekend! Just thought I might stop by and see if Josh was home!"

Twilight gave her a confused look. "Why?"

"Well yesterday I asked Josh if we could hang out on the weekend, so I'm here to see if he's awake."

It was Twilight’s luck that she got an opportunity like this and she wasn't about to give it up.

"Hey Rainbow, can you do me a BIG favor?"

Rainbow Dash smiled, happy to be of assistance to her friend, "Sure Twilight, anything! What is it?"

"Well, last night I asked Josh about...human mating and he overreacted a bit...so I volunteered myself to go on a date with him so would be easier in the study of human reproduction.

Unfortunately it made him extremely nervous. So since you’re close friends with him, I was wondering if you would go on a date with him?"

Rainbow Dash went silent for a few seconds. "How can I put this, hmmm...NO!”

"Rainbow I REALLY need your help on this, you're hanging out with him today anyway, why not make it a date!" Twilight pleaded.

Rainbow was getting annoyed. "Look Twilight, no matter what you say...you'll never convince me to take him out on a date!"

Twilight searched her brain for a way to make Dash want to go on a date with Josh. Wait, is it really that simple?

"Ok Dash, if there's ANYTHING you want, just say it"

A disturbingly mischievous smile formed on the cyan pegasus’s face.

"Anything I want eh?"

"Yes Rainbow, anything.

I really need this for science, please"

"Uurrrrrg, FINE...but I want VIP pass for the cider season line!"

"OK Dash, you got yourself a deal! I'll talk to applejack about it."

They both shook their hooves on the bet and they heard Josh coming downstairs.

*Josh’s Point of View*

"Ok Twi I've been thinking...if you really need to know about human mating...then I’ll accept your date to discuss it”

"That’s ok Josh; you don't need to date me"

Thank you Jesus!!!

Then I notice Dash was here, "Sup Dash, ready to hang out today!"

She gave me a smirk and replied, "Hi to you too bro!, and Yeah I'm pumped!"

I turned to Twilight "So Twi, you sure you don't need to talk about human dating and such?"

She shook her head. "No need to Josh"

"Phew!" That’s a relief.

"Cause Dash is taking you out to do it!"

What did she just say!

"Wait! Me and dash… on a date"

Twilight knew I was going to panic and tried to calm me down.

"Josh...I'll pay you if you go." I calmed down a bit. I do need the money, so I decided to get this over with.

"Fine...you got a deal Twi!" We both shook on the deal.

Dash and I took off into town. It was a little awkward walking without saying anything so I decided to break the ice.
“So...how’s the weather business?” She turned to look at me.

“Good, sometimes it gets boring, but it's a living!” I nodded to the agreement and we both continued walking.

We went to Sugarcube Corner to get something to eat for breakfast. When we entered I noticed Mrs. Cake near the counter and she welcomed us with a cheerful smile.

“Well hello there Rainbow Dash!, nice to see you here...and who’s your friend?!”

“I know, you’re that human that everypony has been talking about! So what brings you here to Sugarcube Corner hon!”

“I’m...just getting breakfast with...Dash”

“Well how delightful, just take your seat and Pinkie will be with you shortly!”

Dash and I approached our table, sat down and waited patiently. It was quiet up until Dash broke the eerie silence between us.

“Josh, thanks for hanging out with me today. I know I would usually be hanging out with my other friends but I wanna get to know you better!”

I sighed “sure I guess. JUST to be clear…We're just hanging out as friends, right?!”

“Of course were just friends!” She then turned away from me with a frown. The facial expression doesn't suit her well.

“Dash, is something bothering you?”

She faced towards me slowly “What? I’m fine Josh! You don't need to be worried about me! I am Rainbow Dash after all!”

She’s lying!

I stared at her for a drawn moment. She gave me a quizzical gesture. “Why are you staring at me like that?”

“No reason, just got distracted by something beautiful”

She blushed a bit. “Oh, what is it?”

“It’s the sweetest thing I ever laid my eyes on!”

She blushed even harder and her eyes widened a bit “Who?”

“It’s, IT’S!”

Dash had the biggest smile. “YES?!”

“It’s, a creamy filled cupcake!!!”

Dash turned to the table behind her and saw bon-bon eating a cupcake. She quickly turned back to me with a serious face and punched me in the arm.

“I guess I deserve that. Sorry, just thought a little tease might cheer you up!”

She looked at me. “Well thanks for trying, but what did I say about flirting with me!” I giggled a bit and dash got a little annoyed. “Let’s just get this thing over with.”

Just then Pinkie trotted in front of us saying in excitement, “Hey Dashie, Hey Joshie. I’m super glad seeing you’re her- Oh My Gosh Are you two Dating? How sweet!!!”

“IT’S FOR SCIENCE!” Both Dash and I yelled out in unison. Pinkie’s only response was a smile. “Oh, why didn't you say so silly willys!! Now what can I get you?!”

Since it’s Ponyville, have to eat what they eat!

“I’ll have um …pancakes!” I said in a happy voice.

“And what will you be having Dashie?!”

“I'll have what he’s having Pinkie, thank you” Pinkie smiled happily and replied “Okie dokie; I'll let you know when they're ready!”

As Pinkie left, I give Dash a confused look. “What is it now, another cupcake bon-bon ordered?!” I shook my head.

“You're having what I'm having? How come?” She shrugged.

“Josh, can I ask you something”

“Sure Dash what is it?”

“Since you're the only human here, Have you ever thought of... having a relationship with a ..mare?”

Why would she be asking me that?!

“Dash, is there something you're trying to tell me?”

Before she could answer, however Pinkie yelled out “PANCAKES ARE DONE!” She trotted over and delivered them to our table. Boy do they smell good! I grabbed my fork and took a bite out of the pancake.

Holy Shit these are delicious!

I noticed Dash ‘pigging’ her food away and eating with her mouth open. When she finished she licked the plate clean, literally! She then noticed me staring at her and I gave her a grossed out face.

“...What?” She asked, oblivious to the obvious.

“Ever heard of table manners?”

She gave me a smirk and replied “Nope, ever heard of bruises?!”I looked at my arm where she punched me and we both giggled a bit.

When I finished my pancakes I asked Dash if she wanted to go for a walk. She smiled brightly and said yes. When we left Sugarcube corner we went for a walk around a park, Dash turned to me with a smile and said.

“Thanks for hanging out with me today...you're really awesome”

“No problem Dash, you're like my best friend!”

“Awesome, lets be Best friends then!!!”

We both brohoof to make us official best friends. We continued our walk until we reached Twilight’s place. We both stop by the door with Dash frowning.

“Sucks that the date is over…”

I looked at her in a confusing manner and she panicked a bit saying “umm well… I’m glad it’s over, now I can collect my reward!”

“What reward?”

“I told twilight that if I go on a date with you, she will have to get me a V.I.P. pass to the cider season line!”

“Cool, I'll get my reward to, BITS!”

“Nice!”

I was a bit upset that she only went on the date for the reward, but I guess she got what she wanted and so did I. We made our goodbyes with us bro hoofing and she flying off into the sky. When I was about to open the door I heard her coming back.

Why is she coming back?

When she landed she faced me and gave me a quick kiss on the cheek.

What just happened?!

She faced me again cheeks crimson. “Well, see ya!” She then flew back into the clouds again. I put my hands on my cheek and smiled a bit. Rainbow Dash kissed me... on the cheek. What a day!

I accepted it as a kiss of friendship.

I then entered Twilight’s house only to find her waiting for me. “Sooo... how was it?”

I shrugged and replied “It was ok I guess.”

She smiled. “Splendid! You have to tell me all about it!”

I sat on the couch next to her and I then told her about my Date with Dash.

When I finished telling her about the date she had begun to finish her research journal on human mating. She put the book away with her magic. “Well, WE'RE DONE! All the information about humans is complete!”

All the information about humans? I only told her stuff that I know.

She got up off of the couch and headed toward the door. “Now if you excuse me, I have to talk to Applejack about Rainbow’s V.I.P ticket. You can come if you want!”

“Sure! Just go ahead and I'll catch up!”

As she left I turned to the bookshelf to read what she had written about humans. I however, had no luck finding the darn thing. Suddenly I felt a tap on my leg. Peering down I saw spike holding the book in one claw. “Looking for this?”

“Thanks spike...you really are Twilight's number one assistant!”

He smiled and left me alone with the book. I opened it and began to read the part on human mating. To be honest, everything she wanted to know was there… but how?

I closed the book after I was finished and headed out toward Applejack’s.

Off to sweet apple acres again!

Author's Note

sorry for the wait!!!, and if you haven't read Chapter 5.5 I suggest you read it.

p.s. This Chapter took awhile then I thought. but its here!, now to get Chapter 7 edited, while I work on Chapter 8 :)