Diseased

by Billblok

Rating: teen
Tags: Queen Chrysalis, Alternate Universe, Sad, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark
Length: 7143

How dare they speak of me as a diseased creature!?

Diseased. How dare they call me diseased!? I am surely cleaner than them! They continually speak of my changelings as rabid, ravenous animals! How dare they call them diseased! How dare they call me a creature infected by a pestilence!

...How dare they be right. How dare they know so much about me in a single glance...

Note: This is at least partially experimental, so don't count on super-regular updates (like none of my other stories). Also, This might be flame bait, but I do not appreciate personal slander, people calling the characters in the story "bitches", "dicks", etc, or any sort of distasteful riffing hidden behind the excuse of "I'm not hating, I'm just trying to make him think".

Published 2013-01-17 03:10:02 UTC
Last updated 2014-05-08 00:01:40 UTC

Prologue: Holes

Pain. There's so much pain.

It hurts to even think. My forehead stings.

I can barely breathe. My ribs hurt so much.

I try to lift myself from the ground. Pain shoots up my front right leg.

None of that hurts as much as the sickening pain of defeat. I tasted the love Shining Armor had for his wife, and got drunk in it. I lost all judgement. I thought I was truly going to defeat an entire country, and therefore let my guard slip, ultimately exposing me and...

...I can't really remember much after that. Celestia must have escaped and struck me in the back. Dirty, sneaky little brat.

It takes some time before I realize somepony is waiting in front of me. I crane my neck to gaze into the blue eyes of an alicorn I don't even know exists. She's just sitting in front of me, as if this were a common occurrence.

"...What do you want?"

"So you're awake. I was hoping I wouldn't have to bury you."

That miserable-- How dare she taunt me?! I speak through labored breaths. "Do you... even know who... I am?"

"Chrysalis, queen of the changelings, and your title does very little to impress me. Especially considering what you did to my niece, and her extended family, including the majority of the population."

Oh, you should be impressed. I could suck you dry if you showed me even the slightest hint of affection... I struggle to stand up. My ribs feel like they are on fire. She's still watching me.

"...I fail to see how such a thing as being able to torture or kill will earn you respect. Do you not find it curious, Chrysalis?" She's walking closer. Why are you coming closer? She's sitting right next to me, eye to eye. It's a good thing she bothered to keep her breath clean... "All this careful planning, months on end of infiltration to weaken our defenses... There were bound to be casualties, yet none of our soldiers were even wounded."

That's it. Time to show her exactly how I feel. I don't need to attack... a well-aimed shot of saliva in her eye should do.

She flinches, but she never hits me. It's relieving, but disappointing at the same time. Others would get mad. She didn't. Why didn't she? She continues on, as if I never did anything to her in the first place.

"I knew weeks ago that this would happen. It is after all my duty to watch over the dreams of ponies, and changelings alike."

"Where does Celestia think you are then?"

The pony gazed at the sun, which was currently setting. "My sister thinks I'm still resting in preparation for the next night. We both agree that it is not really her place to know what I do behind the scenes." She turns back to me, and for some reason her gaze softens. "But I think it's time I told you what I'm here for. You must face your fears."

My ears fall flat against my skull. Don't you dare talk about that, you monster!

"You're diseased, Chrysalis; you and every one of your changelings."

No, we are NOT! Stop saying that!!

"It's quite clear to me and anypony who has ever glimpsed you. I know those holes aren't just how you look."

"Shut up..."

"You need help, and quickly."

"SHUT UP!!"

She stops for a moment, and then she still continues! "Chrysalis, I have no power to fix this. Only the elements of harmony could possibly help you. However, most ponies think you and your kind are cruel, self-centered, cheating, greedy, and cynical."

"SHUT UP!!" I scream. I shiver uncontrollably as my hooves clamp over my ears, trying to drown out whatever horrible words she's saying. How dare she?! Who is she to come to me, queen of the changelings, call me these things, and dare say that I need anyone?! That blue wretch!! I've had enough!!

I've had enough of this...!

Stop... Please...

My body suddenly feels warm. I stare in shock. Is she hugging me?! No, I had to get out. I struggle for a few moments, then pain shoots up my leg again. My head's rested under her chin. Am I crying? I feel exposed... Her hoof gently rubs my back. Her words fill my ears once more, but more in a whisper than anything else. I make no more effort to drown out the voice. What's the point?

"Do not despair," She soothes. "You can always prove them wrong. Aside from that, there is one pony I know personally that does not care what you did, and I'm sure there are plenty of others."

My words come out as if I'm a scared little nymph who had came to see the queen for the first time. "H-how do I f-find that pony...?"

She chuckles a little. "There's no need to find her, Chrysalis; she has already found you. You've been in a coma for the past week, and she's about to wake you up." I gasp as I feel her lips touch my forehead with all the tenderness of a mother to her newborn. "Good luck," she whispers, smiling.

The world flashes white, and my eyes slowly and agonizingly open. I hear crying. Who's crying? My eyes focus, and there's a pegasus mare next to me. She must have been crying for a while. What's the matter? Did her rabbit die or something?

"N-n-no... Don't die on me... You have to be alright, you have to; I gave you f-first aid, P-please open your eyes!!"

I tried to move. My body burned. I whimper in pain. Then I see her face. I lay there, stunned as she cries with overjoyed relief.

A spirit of harmony wants me to live? Why? There must be some other motivation, Ponies don't just weep over a nearly dead changeling...

Author's Note

Yup, New story, I know. I have two others going on, I know that too. But I decided the only way to properly function with writing was to have at least three different projects going on at once. Here's hoping that I don't make the ex-villain ex-villainy too soon.

Do spend the time contributing your opinions on this story, I'll need some proper suggestions to keep this going at a pace that everyone likes. (be warned, I will not try to please everyone *cough*lesboshippers*cough*, There are some things I do not appreciate, and I intend to keep those things out, so don't even try.)

Day 1, Morning: Kindness

Please note: Bright yellow text incoming! I suggest you use the dark color format!
-Firefanatic-

Fluttershy cried in overjoyed relief. It worked! It really worked! Not only had her bleeding stopped, but she opened her eyes! She could barely contain her happiness. She didn't know what she would have done if she actually stopped breathing. Fluttershy wanted to bring her in to her house to heal her and make sure she was in peak condition. All she needed was to carry her to her bed, and she could sleep on the couch for a week or two. There was one problem though.

She reached to help her onto the makeshift stretcher she had with her when Chrysalis' hoof knocked her back. "Don't touch me," the changeling growled. She shrank back in alarm.

"I'm sorry... I didn't know you didn't like being touched by ponies." She stood up. "I'll just get some of my animal friends to do that for me, if that's okay with you." She started to walk away.

Animals? No, animals are far worse than ponies, they don't even offer any love to us!

No, I have to get up. I have to get out of here. I roll myself onto my belly, which is a struggle to begin with. My legs feel on fire as pull myself up. Hopefully I can get out of here in relative ease before she's done talking with those beavers.

"No wait, please stay down," the pony calls. Just my luck. My legs quiver as I try to walk faster, preferably away from the mistreatment of animals. She tells me to stay down again, but far more firmly. I feel a hoof touch my shoulder, and I shake it off.

"I don't need your help!"

"Yes you do. If you didn't, you would be walking without a limp, your horn wouldn't be cracked, and I wouldn't have had to wake you up from unconsciousness." So I made her mad. Not my problem really. She's got to learn that not everyone will blindly obey.

I turn around to look into the mad eyes of a pegasus. I speek through gritted teeth. "What little you did was enough. Now leave me be so I can go back to my people."

She growls. That's not natural. In an instant she's in my face, Yelling at the top of her lungs. I can only stare back. All I can see are her eyes, forever piercing my mind.

"YOU WILL NOT! YOU ARE HURT! YOU WERE BLEEDING TO DEATH AND YOU HAVE A SERIOUS INFECTION! NOW STAY DOWN OR SO HELP ME, I WILL TIE YOU UP JUST TO MAKE SURE YOU RECOVER!"

By that time, I was on my back, because I had fallen over trying to pull away from her. My back burns from the landing. She gasps, her hooves covering her mouth, and quickly rushes over to where I am.

"I''m sorry, I'm so sorry... Are you injured? Oh no, Your back! Did you snap your back-plate? We've gotta get you in as soon as possible..." She fawns over me like a concerned mother, as I stare, entirely dumbstruck by what she just did.

My shock had rendered me immobile, so I sit, waiting for her to make her next move.

Fluttershy very carefully reached with a hoof, just to make sure she was okay with it. Seeing that she made no move to push her away, she very carefully lifted her onto the stretcher, apologizing for every time the changeling made any grunt of pain or groan of discomfort. Slowly, she brought her inside the house, and put her to rest on her bed. She left and was soon back with a medicine box. She examined the changeling's back, frowning at what she saw. "Um," She started awkwardly. "This may sound strange to you, but does your chitin grow back on it's own?"

She waited for her answer. There was but a nod in confirmation. "Well," she replied. "I'm going to have to remove the broken parts, or your chitin will never properly heal." She pulled out a pair of tweezers, and the changeling's eyes narrowed to pinpricks. Delicately holding the tweezers in her feathers, she reached around to the changeling queen's back and got to work, wet cloth also at the ready. Being an unprofessional veterinarian, blood was not something the typically timid pegasus was squeamish of. With the utmost care, she picked at the cracked pieces, discarding the dead chitin in a wastebasket. For a while she continued this, swabbing up the blood from the seeping wound, and then something caught her eye.

She shook her head, thinking that it couldn't possibly be. But just to make sure, she took a closer look, being especially careful. She gasped almost inaudibly. Underneath what she removed, there appeared to be... a coat of fur?

She tried not to think about it till she was done. Dressing the would, she then left. Chrysalis probably needed some time alone, anyway.

She's left me. Why did she leave me? I sit in silence for a time before slowly sitting up. My body protests at the movement, but I eventually prop myself up, allowing the blanket to lay spread across my back legs.

I'm all alone. What do I do now? Looking around the room, I notice it's quite small, wooden, and around the walls are a few holes, which I suspected were for mice to come and go at their leisure. The room is mostly wooden, and a few bird houses hang in a corner and out the window. I sigh to myself, idly tucking the covers around my legs; my mind retreats to what I last recalled before waking up in the yellow pony's front yard. Diseased? How dare she call me diseased... I feel entirely fine! I've been bashed and bruised up plenty of times before, this is nothing! Sure my legs hurt, and so does the rest of my body, but I know what diseased feels like, and this isn't it! Maybe I can shut her up for good when I recover...

As if by some cruel twist of irony, my body tenses up, and I feel a sharp pain in my chest which burns up into my throat. That is soon followed up by nausea and a burning headache. It's only half a second before my stomach suddenly decides to purge itself of its contents. Recently consumed love like a mist is the first to leave in dry heaves. Then came the sickeningly sweet bile best described as "changeling honey", in pony terms. In any other case, the expulsion of love would be second nature to me and my children; however after wiping the sickeningly sweet taste from my mouth and opening my eyes, I come across an old problem I've been having for a while. The honey that I regurgitated is a dull grey rather than the usual green color, and black crystals were forming from it. It's with a small struggle that I lay my head back down, considering my plan to get out of this mess. There's only ever been one way to fix the problem so far, and that's always been love. I pull the covers up to my neck and lay to one side, feigning sleep. She'll come back soon, all I have to do is wait...

Fluttershy was busy pacing around the living room of her cottage, pondering what exactly she saw when caring for the changeling queen in her bedroom. It was fur, there was no mistaking it; but that didn't mean it hadn't left her confused. Why would a changeling have fur? Was it some safeguard for a broken exoskeleton? Or is there some sort of secret she's hiding? Those questions left Fluttershy when she heard retching from the bedroom. Oh no! I didn't remember to get a bucket! Holding back her overwhelming amounts of concern, Fluttershy took slow steps up the stairs to her bedroom, cloths ready to clean up the mess. With the job done, she peered at the bed. The changeling queen's eyes were shut, her mouth in a frown.

Fluttershy smiled sadly at the resting figure. Poor mare, she must be so tired. I hope she gets her energy back soon... She walked up to the queen, gently placing a hoof on her side, rubbing slowly.

The changeling queen giggled with glee. "Gotcha."

Fluttershy felt her energy suddenly seeping from her body, replaced by a tired sleepiness. Her legs gave out from beneath her, and she fell to her side, flopped on the wooden boards below her. Weakly, she reached a hoof up to the queen. "W-wait..." She begged. "I still have to help you..."

Oh that's so delicious! My mouth waters as the taste floods down my throat in a mix of sweetness and a refreshing flavor like lemonade. I've sometimes found myself a connoisseur of love, having tasted many different flavors of love. Each pony has a different sort of love, and even the different expressions of love are unique in their own way, each one with its own delicious taste. I quickly find my energy returning to me, the pain in my body turning into a dull ache. Tolerable, but I still need more. I continued my consumption until I heard my prey whimper, barely audibly.

"W-wait... I still have to help you...!"

I chuckle, leaning down to her on my good hooves. "Help me? But you already have! And what good it did, I feel quite refreshed! My fever's all gone, and I don't feel dizzy at all! Thanks to you," I pat my hoof on her little head. "I feel like I can conquer the world!"

"You shouldn't leave yet..." The pegasus mumbles. I laugh, standing back up again.

"Oh don't worry about that."

"Why not...?"

My lips turn into a snarl as my smile fades to my real feelings: This pony would be a threat to me and my mission. I raise a hoof into the air. "You shouldn't worry, because you won't be around to see me go!!" My horn glows green with the energy I took from her, ready to snuff her out.

UNNECESSARY.

...What? Unnecessary? Of course it is! She's a threat! I snarl, ready to release the energy.

UNNECESSARY.

I... What?! My horn's glow fizzles out as I sand there confused. I look around, trying to find the source of the voice. I... I guess it is unnecessary, but only as much as trophy hunting, is that so wrong?

CRUEL.

It is not!! I live on love, sometimes I have to kill, that's life!! It hurts!!

CRUEL.

SADIST.

MURDERER.

...What...? My hoof drops to the floor. I speak audibly. "...Why? What... what are you against...?" Five concepts fill my head.

DEATH. GRIEF. FEAR. TORTURE. PAIN.

I slump to the foot of the bed, bending my bad leg with a jolt of pain. She's a pony... Why should I care?

QUEENS.

Yes, I am a queen. Why does that matter?

NO. An answer of denial and the rejection of my position. I feel very insulted. "But... I am a queen, not some dirty butt tattooed mud animal!"

NO SUCH THING. I flinch from the sudden fact that I was deluding myself. It makes me angrier. "Well WHAT IS A QUEEN IF I'M NOT ONE!?" Another wave of concepts bombard me, only making me more frustrated.

KIND. TENDER. MERCIFUL. COMFORTING. NURTURING.

OPEN YOUR EYES. LOOK. SEE. EMPATHIZE. PITY.

Clutching my head, I snarl, staring the pony in the eyes. "FINE!!" I scream. I continue to stare, hoping that the entity putting the concepts in my head will go away.

Something clicks. Before me lies a sobbing pony, too weak to even properly cry. She shivers, eyes wide with fear and tears streaming down her face. Her eyes are puffy, and she's biting her lip, terrified of what I would do to her next. The last thing I expect is for my gaze to soften and my breathing to slow. By some unknown force, my forelegs reach out, gently picking up the pegasus and holding her to my chest. My voice forms the words of an apology and a plea for forgiveness, to which she simply nods, laying her head on my shoulder. "I... I never actually got your name," I start. The pegasus is asleep, however, and I stare down at my back legs. My eyes widen in shock, and I hold the pony closer.

The holes in my leg have gotten larger. That's not good. I'd better take this pony with me... She might help me more.

Author's Note

Sorry folks, this wasn't really the update you were expecting, was it? But hey, it's much better than Waiting an extra MONTH for nothing, so here you go. I can't say I go very deep into dark tags, but it'll at least be dark for my standards. Anyway, I hope this chapter isn't much of a disappointment.

Day 1, Afternoon: Kindness in Captivity

Sorry folks, more bright yellow text. Probably best if you keep the reading color at dark.

-Firefanatic

Fluttershy's eyes slowly opened, but no light greeted them. The space around her was quite restricted, and she had to stay curled up in a little ball to actually fit. She was too tired to make any sort of struggle or search for some way out, so she just lay there. The worst part was how she thought that being in such a claustrophobic situation would be uncomfortable, but it wasn't. Whatever she was in supported her body just right, and she was gently rocked back and fourth as it carried her along an unseen path. She was sure something was wrong, but she had no idea what it was yet.

The rocking was soon replaced by a steady buzzing sound, and her thoughts drifted to Chrysalis. She had been in an awful state, her legs broken and chitin cracked along the back. She had a terrible gash along one side of her face, too, and her horn was cracked. But that wasn't everything. She wasn't sure what was normal, but when the changeling queen vomited up that black slime, she was certain it wasn't healthy. It was obvious she was fighting an infection of some sort. It amazed her that she was somehow able to stand up after ingesting her small amount of love that she could offer.

Her world shifted, and a green flame flickered next to where her head was, opening up to a hole large enough for a pony to fit through. Fluttershy winced at the light outside the hole, but was nevertheless eager to leave the small space and get on to stable ground. With some measure of struggle, she crawled out, falling awkwardly between the Changeling Queen's front legs. Staring up she looked in confusion as the hole in Chrysalis' abdomen shrank to nothing, licked away by green tongues of fire. Then she looked at herself, sitting in the sand in the desert. She gasped in horror.

Instead of the yellow coat she was familiar with, her body was entirely black with hard chitin covering every square inch. Her mane and limbs had holes going cleanly through them. The only things that were spared from the transformation were her eyes, and strangely enough, her cutie mark. Her heart had began to race. What were the implications? Had the queen... converted her while she was inside of her? Would her mind soon connect to this foreign species, and make her lose herself? Would she have to live off the love of her friends? would she hold part in the next invasion?? She shivered, trying to hold back tears.

"I hope you don't mind the little change to your body that I gave you," Chrysalis began. "But I thought would probably get less flack if I claimed you were my daughter rather than a pony." She stared up at the queen, her ears flat against her skull. A hoof pulled her up to her shaking legs. "Come on; I have things to show you."

I don't know why I spared her in the first place. But here I have that pony, hidden in plain sight, right inside the empty cavity where most of my organs used to be, now blended in with the rest of my body; still functional, but more compact. I've always wondered how ponies could live with such limitations to their bodies. I mean, who would ever be able to go without an immediate way to store things on their person? Clothing's just redundant.

To not attract attention from the ponies, I spend the first leg of the journey walking, preferably a little ways into the forest; That way, they won't catch a changeling walking, or hear suspiciously buzzing wings. Ponies and animals frequently ignore out-of-place things if you act like it's your normal route. But I'm confused. Ever since consuming her love, I've been having foreign thoughts. They're more subtle now, but it doesn't keep me from noticing them.

Protect her.

Keep her safe.

Keep her comfortable.

As I walk further into the forest where no ponies can actually see me, I idly check my occupant's vitals. She seems fine, but I stir her awake from her love exhaustion. It's been a few hours, of course she would probably be able to wake up by now. The vegetation starts to be the sort that handles dry climates better, and that's my cue to take up on my wings and fly. I wince from the pain as my cracked wing covers open up for my delicate, lightweight appendages to unfold, thankful that the semi transparent wings came out of the disaster unscathed.

I lift off, set for one destination in mind, and wonder how I'll get the pony into the hive, and stay in. An idea strikes me. I know, I'll make her look like a changeling so she thinks she is a changeling! Then she'll think she isn't fit for pony society any longer, and she'll stay with me, safe and protected!

What's wrong with my head...? I shake my head to clear my mind and cast a changeling spell to disguise the pegasus. She won't be able to change back without my command, so she should be fine. Then I land, allowing her an opening to get out of. She appears properly convinced that this is permanent. Telling her that I changed her body is all it takes for her to give up going back to where she came from.

With a hoof, I help the pony up to her legs, staying close to her for support. It's quite obvious she's still quite fatigued from my... consumption of her love, especially since her sclera(1) is very much green. Her eyelids droop, and her legs quiver. It'll be some time before she stops blindly obeying commands, or for her to be able to survive any more feeding. It doesn't matter, I'm not doing much better anyway, and it takes a lot of work to hide my own exhaustion from the trip from the little town to my home.

Or at least, what's left of it. Looking at the naturally dark and barren place, I see some glints of my soldiers returning to the hive, some limping on, before falling and having to be carried by the more fortunate, some flying on injured wings. My workers and care-takers rush to these changelings, their eyes wide in fear and concern.(2)

Some of those soldiers had spouses and children, which they would probably never return to, if the Equestrians caught them. Those soldiers send reassurances to my mind that they would recover, and I should do what I always did, which was to lead on. It isn't necessary; the tears stopped falling long ago.

I continue to limp, my body aching again after what seemed like hours of feeling perfectly healthy, until I hear crying next to me. The pony can't keep her eyes off the changeling soldiers, their eyes pierced and their legs snapped nearly all the way through. Some leave violet trails of blood as they drag themselves home. A mother and a nymph cry over the body of the nymph's father. The pony sobs, even as I open up the cracked covers on my back to lay a glittering wing over her.

"They... they look s-s-so sick..." She whispers. There's that word. Sick. I'm not sick, that was just a frequent problem of mine, and who cares that the holes in my body are bigger, that changes nothing! I retract my wing, urging her forward and through the entrance to the hive. I don't know why I'm so quick to get to my living quarters; my children already believe that the pony is actually my daughter.(3)

By the time I get to my chambers, giving reassurances I am in fact all right, my stomach feels sick. It appears that the problem has come up again. Luckily, I'm strong enough to cast an anti-nausea spell before I have a repeat of this morning. I then promptly collapse on one of the couches I have, before any of the other symptoms can pop up. I'm just glad to be home after two weeks away, even if I couldn't remember the second week.

I watched as the pony slipped up on her tired hooves, awkwardly falling over. Then with my magic, I picked her up and rest her on my bed, again driving myself into confusion over such an act. No one, and I mean no one was ever allowed on my bed, not even my own sons and daughters. What makes her so special? Whatever, I can feel her gratitude, and she needs it, right?

Despite her grattitude, the question still comes up from the pony. "...Why did you spare me...?"

...That's a real good question.

Fluttershy walked into the spacious room as the changeling queen fell unceremoniously on a couch. The room was round, with green stain-glass windows at the other end of the room. In the middle of the room lay several lounging couches, one of which Chrysalis was in, and a hearth to the right of those. At the left and back was a wardrobe, and to its left was a bed with four tall posts, a roof, and a curtain for shutting out the daylight. Everything was colored in a scheme of black, blue and green. On the ceiling was a green crystal with one long spire and eight smaller spires which jutted out diagonally from the base of it; probably a chandelier. She only managed a couple more steps before fatigue made her lose her footing and fall to her side.

The emerald aura of the changeling queen lifted her up, gently placing her down on the bed. The bed was adorned with black covers and dark green pillows at one end. She felt uncomfortable actually properly laying down, feeling it might be some sort of forbidden thing to even be on the queen's bed in the first place.

...Why?

Why had Chrysalis allowed her to sit on her bed?

Why did she place a comforting wing over her when she was upset for the changelings?

Why was she there to make sure she didn't fall on the way to her chambers?

Why had she helped her up in the first place?

"Wh- why... Why did you spare me...?"

There was a long silence from the changeling queen, lost in her thoughts. Eventually, she dodged the question with one of her own. "What's your name, pony?"

She shrank down. "Fluttershy..."

The changeling queen nodded. "Do you know why you're here?" Fluttershy shook her head. "I suspected not. I was honestly hoping you'd know." The queen sighed. "It would be rude to not give you my name. I'm Chrysalis."

Fluttershy said nothing, simply staring at the quilt. So much had happened. First, she was dragged to this hive. Second, she lost all semblance of her identity by being converted into a changeling. Now she was being held against her will, after nearly being killed because of a little bit of kindness. But she could bear those facts. Chrysalis was now full, and won't seek out another victim for a while. Fluttershy's life was spared; and as of late, She was being treated far better than she expected. But there was still the question of why. Why... why had she been spared? Why choose her first to separate and capture the elements? Why treat her so well? Why had she been giving the fortune of living without worrying about food, when the changelings sometimes went for days without it? Why did they suffer, while she prospered...?

It wasn't fair. Fresh tears left her tired eyes. She was sick of crying. Furiously, she rubbed at her eyes, trying to hide her tears. It wasn't fair. Her breath hitched from the oncoming crying. She was sick of it. Sick of crying, sick of her heart so easily breaking, sick of the fact she had such danged good fortune.

"It's not fair..."

Chrysalis looked back at Fluttershy. "What's not fair?"

"Why do your people have to suffer...?"

"We're not suffering..."

"Y-yes you are, I'm the only changeling who *hic* doesn't have any problems, and I have to watch you all get sicker and sicker, trying to get f-food to help heal yourselves."

"We're not diseased."

"But it doesn't work; and h-here I am, unable to d-do a *hic* a thing about it! It's not fair!"

"We're not--"

"It's all wrong! I c-can't live on knowing you're all *hic* dying! it's not fair!!"

"FLUTTERSHY, BE QUIET!!" Fluttershy jumped, staring at her in fear. "We are not diseased. Is that clear?"

"Y-y-yes, Queen Chrysalis..."

Chrysalis sighed. "No, I'm afraid that will not do. The changelings think I'm your mother, so you'll have to act like it. Now let's try it again: is that clear?"

"Yes... Mom."

"I'll... be back later. Get some sleep." Without any hesitation, Fluttershy's eyes sagged, and she tipped over, drowsy, compelled by the same force that sapped her energy from her body. Before she had truly fallen asleep though, one thing had spoken in her head, and she let it out through her mouth.

"Only the meek can truly inherit the universe..."

"...What?"

"T...Tuck me in...?" Fluttershy's eyes closed, and she fell into silence.

Chrysalis sighed, taking in the sight of her "guest"'s slow breaths as she slept. Then she lit her horn to leave the hive on her continued mission.

The door closed behind the pegasus, now sleeping beneath silken quilts; her own body dwarfed by the size of the bed.

What is going on? I feel so sick to my stomach. It's as though I barely have any control over myself.

I know what I'm like. I remember quite clearly what I do and have done to ponies who have no more use to me. It used to be the same old routine. Drain their love, then leave their husks to die helplessly. Since when have I cared for them? Since when did I care for any but my own changelings?

My lips curl into a snarl, and my knees shake. It was her. It must have been her. She's responsible for my sudden loss of control! How dare she toy with my mind! With silent rage, my horn lights up, once more to smite my so-called "daughter". I won't even care that she leaves filthy pony-blood on the bed, she must be executed for high treason!

But I stop myself. This time there's no voice to do that for me. No argument with myself, or anyone else... just me. I can't bring myself to do it... I would just bring about more pain.

My horn's glow fades to a gentler color. It was so easy to do before... what changed in me? Why am I behaving like this? Am I so far gone in desperation for love that I can't dispose of something beyond use for thought that there just might be a measly scrap?

No... not something... someone. With a sigh, I walk towards the doorway, trying to justify my strange actions... but I can't. There is no reasoning behind it, no cause for it; it is but empty... kindness. I'm not sure what to do. Should I go with it, or try to reject it, and return to what I once was? After all, what benefit is there to possibly being nice to ponies?

Without even knowing it, I've already answered my own question, having just finished tucking the pony in. My hoof is only just barely touching, when she subconsciously closes the distance with her muzzle. A strange, warm feeling flows inside of me... and I think I like it. Now I see. There is no true reward for kindness... when kindness is its own reward.

I make a decision then, this time without any doubt or confusion, to never hurt her again. I know why I spared her now. Not because she is useful... Not for my amusement... not because of any sort of madness...

I spared her because I am kind. It's a good thing, kindness. But the warm feeling in particular is quite nice. It's a merciful thing too.

I lean in close to whisper "Sleep well, Fluttershy", before I leave and close the door gently behind me.

I am Queen Chrysalis. Chrysalis, the kind queen. I think I could get used to that title... But I wonder, if kindness is so good, then why didn't I realize that sooner? I'm a queen, I'm supposed to think of these things on my own.

As I decide to set out to my next destination, whatever that is, I hear the most horrible thing one could possibly hear in their minds. A cry of anguished pain and distress. Without any hesitance, I pinpoint the source of distress and speed my way down the corridors. I arrive upon many changelings, all gathered in a small circle. In a strong authoritative voice, I speak: "Minions! What is the cause for such noise?"

A reply, ragged and barely loud enough to hear, returns from inside the circle. "My q-queen... help..." I push through the crowd to find the one that can barely lift himself up at all. I can't blame him, I already notice how weak he is. His body shivers with pain, and there's a cold sweat on his forehead. But that is the least of my concerns. I look at his legs, and find that his holes too have grown bigger; and they don't stop there. The blood leaves my face from seeing the holes along his neck, upon his face, and down his back. Where the holes were too big, his body cracked and fractured.

I barely manage to compose myself, sickened by the poor changeling's state. "Are... are you--"

"Dying, my queen... H-help me..."

No... No, it can't be... "You heard, get him help!"

None of them moved, I get angry. "What are you doing?! Don't the care takers know anything?!?"

"We're sorry, my queen," One of them says. "You were our last option. And if you don't know how to heal him... then who does?"

My head sank, and as carefully as possible, I lift the changeling, trying not to do more damage. I try desperately to patch up the broken being in my arms. Please don't die, oh please don't die, I'll do anything, just please don't die! I was so terrified for him, that he would have to die so painfully, and I could do so little to help. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry; you poor thing, I'm so sorry..."

"My q... queen... are you crying...?"

I gasp, bringing a hoof to my irritated eyes. "I... yes. Yes, I'm crying."

The broken changeling's gentle laughter turns into a sick cough. "It's alright, m-my queen... You've d... done all you could... I... I was only going to live so long..."

"O-only so long? What do you mean?"

My subject's heartbeat is getting weaker. He's got minutes, at most. "H-holes grew bigger... couldn't fly... Couldn't...walk..."

Th-that means--!

"H-holes in m-my lungs...It's too l...Late for me...G-goodbye... m...my q...Chry...salis..."

There have only been a few times I have ever witnessed death personally. The end of a life. The final action before the cutting short of existence. But those times, I only saw at a distance. Feeling the air leaving the changeling's lungs in a long drawn out release makes my own breathing stop for a moment. I wait for him to take another breath. "minion...?"

There's no reply from the changeling. I jostle him gently.

"...minion?" There's still no reply, and finally the tears start falling. My hooves curl around my fallen subject, and I cradle him, whispering apologies over and over. There is nothing I could have done... "I'm so sorry... I'm so sorry... I wish I could have done more... At... at least your suffering's finally over... right?"

I'm not sure how long I cry, but the the hooves of the other changelings on my shoulders tell me that I may cry, so I do so. I remember his name; Thorax, it was. A worker, stayed at home; had a mate and three children; now present and mourning his death like I am. Remembered by many as a loving father and a devoted worker. Probably what did him in.

I'm broken out of my mourning when I hear a crack noise. I look at Thorax's body in alarm.

Little by little, the changeling's chitin was fracturing into little pieces. I try to keep it together; put him down, heat treat the chitin to melt the cracks together, anything at all.

His body crumbles in front of me, and a dark purple powder is released. One of the changelings accidentally inhales it, and the holes on her legs grow.

I let out a shrill scream

Author's Note

Yeah, you thought I wasn't going to have any sort of dark in this dark story, did you?? Sorry to disappoint. :P

Anyway, I've finished a chapter on this story, so I guess it's no longer on hiatus.

Further notes below.

-My general headcannon explanation with the first scene is that since a changeling can turn into a different form of pony, then why shouldn't they be able to morph their body in such a way to smuggle items or kidnapped ponies?

-Apparently, It's excruciatingly difficult to keep tenses in check. I have gone, will go, or am going mad.

-Brightly colored text is now a thing, and probably will be a thing for the rest of the story, I think.

-And here we have a demonstration of just how bad this disease is.

Reference materials here:

Also known as the whites of the eyes. [Click me for proof!] I'm using this word simply because Changelings do not have white sclera usually, so there would be no reason for a changeling to call them the whites. Same body part, different name.

Changelings differ in body type depending on what sort of position they fulfill in a hive, those being workers, caretakers, soldiers, drones, and royalty. Workers have larger, more beetle-like body. Care-takers have a sleeker, dragonfly like body, caring for injured changelings. Soldiers are the conventional design. Drones are like fireflies, negotiating with other hives on their queen's behalf and lighting the way in the night. Royalty is about a mix of all of these, and responsible for leadership and growth of the hive. The color of their hair defines a changeling's eye color in the hive, and their eyes and magic define the color of the hive's magic. Changeling hair color varies among them, but does not stray very far from the queen's hair color.

While changelings can have children, changeling royalty are required to expand the hive. Changeling royalty have a great number of children born from eggs, and queens often over their lifetimes give live birth to other royalty, typically averaging fifteen or twenty royalty and over ten thousand eggs. Therefore, only the royalty are personally named and raised by other royalty.