Partypocalypse

by Crosis

Rating: everyone
Tags: Slice of Life, Princess Luna, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Pinkie Pie, Random, Princess Celestia
Length: 5008

Two souls find themselves restless on a lonely summer night. Luna wishes for some excitement, and Pinkie Pie just wants to party. Both will get what they desire, but in the end, one is going to really, REALLY wish she hadn't.

When Pinkie Pie tragically finds herself without a reason to party, a flash of (literal) divine inspiration leads her to a veritable treasure trove of party potential.

Meanwhile, Princess Luna grows melancholy with the solitude of night. She longs for excitement. But will she soon discover that it is quite possible to have too much of a good thing?

Published 2013-01-06 23:10:02 UTC
Last updated 2013-01-06 23:10:02 UTC

1. Luna meets the Perpetual Party Pony

So sometime in the past day this particular idea wormed its way into my head and refused to leave. It seemed like a pretty plausible Pinkie Pie plot, so I decided to run with it. Hope everyone enjoys!

The day is okay

and the sun can be fun

But I live to see those rays slip away…

Blue Öyster Cult- I Love The Night

Luna meets the Perpetual Party Pony

It was a typical summer day in Ponyville. The sun was shining, the sky was cloudless, and ponies of all ages romped about in carefree contentment.

Well, except for one.

There was one particular mare that was quite frankly in no mood to frolic. This mare had suffered a tragedy. Due to the cruel machinations of fate, her pastime, her passion, indeed the activity that defined her very being, had been taken away.

Was it Applejack, confined to the house and unable to buck apples after breaking her leg stepping in a gopher hole?

Don’t be ridiculous. Everypony knows that she would hobble out on three legs and head butt fruit off the tree if necessary.

Rarity, then? Was some large fashion show on the horizon, only for tragedy to occur when she suffered the fashionista version of writer’s block?

Plausible, but fortunately, no. Equestrian ears could never withstand that degree of dramatizing.

Perhaps it was Twilight! What if, in her usual overzealous pursuit of knowledge, she mistakenly cast a spell that removed her inability to read and was now on the verge of a total psychotic breakdown?!

Not even close. This was even more serious. Even more tragic!

Pinkie Pie… had no reason to party!

It was a very difficult truth to accept. Pinkie’s eyes darted between the pages of her Party Planner, certain that there had to be a mistake. She flipped through the book at a rapid pace, checking birthdates, national holidays, important days in history, but to no avail.

She just couldn’t believe it. She was in a party dead zone! No birthdays for another week and a half, and Coltlumbus Day was over a month away!

Frantic, she continued searching. International holidays! Unimportant days in history! Planetary alignments! Doomsday prophecies! Anything that would make this day significant enough to warrant some manner of festivity.

Not. A. Damn. Thing.

Pinkie’s jaw twitched, her eyes sliding out of alignment. This had to be a mistake. Or a bad dream. Or some fanfiction writer screwing with her again!

But she’d show them, she’d show them all! With Celestia as her witness, she would party before the night ended!

Rushing out of Sugarcube Corner, she made a beeline for the Carousel Boutique. If she couldn’t find a reason to throw a party, then she’d make one instead!

Maybe Rarity would be putting the finishing touches on a project, and she could throw a ‘Congratulations on making a dress’ party. Or if Sweetie Belle was helping, it would be the perfect chance for a ‘Way to not wreck the entire shop this time’ party.

Her spirits improving with each hypothetical, she cackled madly, bounced up to the entrance and drew back a hoof to knock.

And smacked Rarity square in the face as the unicorn opened the door.

Even clutching her face and yowling in pain, Rarity was the picture of feminine grace and beauty. She did not so much fall as sink elegantly to the ground like a ballerina ending her swan song.

Well, that’s how Spike would have described it. To Pinkie it looked like Rarity was rolling around on the floor, shrieking like a banshee. The party pony doubted that Opalescence would have carried on that much if somepony had slammed her tail in a door.

Although… it did look kinda fun. Indulging herself, Pinkie Pie flopped down beside Rarity and began screaming and moaning and rolling about. This served two useful purposes.

First, it was quite enjoyable, managing to occupy Pinkie’s hyper-excitable mind and infinitesimally short attention span for an entire minute.

Second, the complete absurdity of the situation was enough to bring Rarity out of her exaggerated suffering. Realizing that the moment had been completed ruined, she straightened up, brushed dust off of her coat, and pretended the whole thing had never happened.

“Good afternoon, Pinkie Pie,” she said with a slightly pained smile. “Might I ask what brings you here on this lovely day?”

Pinkie stopped in mid-scream, a look of confusion passing over her face. That was a good question. Why had she come over here? She bit her lip, her bright blue eyes momentarily crossing…

Of course, she remembered now! She was looking for the perfect premise to prepare a party. Bouncing to her hooves, she gave Rarity what she considered to be her most innocent and disarming smile.

In reality, it looked about as innocent as a vampire inviting you to a blood drive.

“Hey Rarity, my super-duper best friend who I totally didn’t mean to use as a door-knocker just now! I was thinking about throwing one of my awesome Pinkie Pie parties, and was wondering, in a completely innocent kinda way, what you and your sister were doing today!”

Good job Pinkie. Keep it vague, don’t let her know you’re fishing for ideas.

Rarity’s smile faded. “Oh, a party sounds like a lovely idea, darling, but I’m afraid neither of us would be able to attend.”

She gestured behind her, and Pinkie could see a small number of suitcases and trunks stacked up in the foyer. “You see, Sweetie and I will be leaving shortly. Our parents have invited us on a vacation of sorts, and I’m sorry to say that we shall be gone for the rest of the week.”

Pinkie was discouraged, but not dissuaded. She could make this work! It would be short-notice, and it might not be extravagant, but she could totally whip up a ‘Bon Voyage and have a good trip’ party before the two unicorns departed.

In a cruel twist of fate, however, Sweetie Belle chose that moment to arrive, pushing a massive trunk that looked full enough to burst.

Rarity’s face paled. “Sw… Sweetie Belle? What on earth is that?”

The filly grinned proudly. “I wanted to help you pack, sis! Then I saw all those bags and things of yours, and decided that’d be WAY too hard to carry. So I stuffed everything in this one!”

Ignoring Rarity’s look of horror, she pumped a hoof in victory. “Cutie Mark Crusader luggage organizer, yay!”

Rarity shrieked and galloped back inside. “Sweetie, no! Oh please, please tell me you didn’t just toss them in without folding…”

The trunk glowed blue and swung open. Rarity’s scream was nearly too high-pitched to hear. On the verge of hyperventilating, the unicorn began tossing clothes in every direction.

“Oh this is horrible, terrible! Just look at these wrinkles! Ghastly! Vulgar! I cannot be seen wearing anything in such a state!”

Magically gathering them into a giant ball of fabric, she rushed to her workroom. “Quickly, Sweetie Belle! Fetch my ironing board, we have to hurry!”

“Hi Pinkie! Bye Pinkie!” Nonplussed by Rarity’s panic, Sweetie gave a quick wave and trotted up the stairs after her.

Pinkie was left staring at the door. Well, that certainly hadn’t worked. But she wouldn’t be stopped by setbacks. After all, you can’t make an omelet without catching two birds in the hand with a rolling stone! Time for Plan A! Or was it R? Shrugging to herself, the party pony turned and bounced away.

Her next target was Fluttershy. After knocking on the door, Pinkie readied a noisemaker in her mouth and inhaled. The moment the yellow pegasus opened the door, she let loose with a blast of festive noise that caused Fluttershy to faint and topple back into her house.

“Oops,” Pinkie said.

“I... um… I’m sorry I fainted on you like that,” Fluttershy said after awakening. “It was so very rude of me.”

Pinkie giggled. “Don’t be sorry, Shy-Shy! It was totally my fault for scaring you like that!” Her expression turned serious. “And I’m gonna make it up to you! I’ll throw the biggest, bestest ‘I’m sorry for making you faint so let’s party’ party!”

Fluttershy turned away, letting her mane hide her face. “Oh… that’s very nice of you to offer, but, well, you really shouldn’t. If… uh… that’s alright with you, Pinkie?”

“Ohhhhh but I SHOULD,” the earth pony insisted.

Fluttershy shook her head. “No, you shouldn’t.” She pointed to the west end of the cottage, where a small pile of blankets and pillows were piled together like a large nest. Amid the multicolored fabrics, the small white shape of a rabbit’s head could be seen, its eyes closed and face in a pained grimace.

“You see, Angel is very sick, and I couldn’t possibly leave him alone. I hope you understand,” she said hesitantly.

Fortunately, Pinkie was prepared for this curveball of fate. “Oh, I understand,” she said. “And you’re right; Angel’s health should be our top priority! And you know what always makes me feel better when I’m sickish?”

“Um… a nice warm bowl of vegetable soup?”

“Well, yeah, I guess…” Pinkie trailed off. “But also A PARTY!”

She snatched up the noisemaker and blew a loud, discordant blast, only to have Fluttershy yank the object away from her.

“No,” the pegasus said sternly. “What he needs right now is peace, quiet, and rest. I’m sorry Pinkie, but Angel cannot party until he’s all better.”

To her credit, Pinkie did not mope and pout and whine about how that could take FOREVER. She was certainly thinking it though. So with a heavy heart, she bid goodbye to Fluttershy and headed back to Ponyville.

Sadly, Plans R, T, and Y were just as unsuccessful. Rainbow Dash was in Cloudsdale for the day, something about a Wonderbolts convention or the like. The Apple family was hard at work and far too busy for any celebrations.

And Twilight Sparkle? She and Spike were currently holed up in the library, engaged in what was doubtlessly a very delicate and ludicrously dangerous experiment, at least if the flashes of light and muffled explosions were any indication. As tempting as it was to investigate, Pinkie knew that it would only end in a polite rejection at best, and an incendiary display of Twilight’s frustration at worst.

Thoroughly discouraged, Pinkie trudged slowly into Ponyville Park, unable to even muster the energy for signature bouncing. Her mane fell straight and flat over her face, her coat losing its normally bright coloration. Flopping down on a bench, she glared up at the sky.

The entire day had been one failure after another. Try as she might, Pinkie had been unable to secure that most precious of prizes. The sheer unwillingness, inability, or unavailability of every pony in Ponyville was too suspicious to be coincidence. No, Pinkie knew that this dearth of festivity was the work of some vile puppet-master who was manipulating the day’s events. A cruel, fickle persona known only as… author.

Well, she wasn’t going to stand for his abuses any longer. Leaping up from the bench, she shook a hoof angrily at the sky.

“Hey, hey you! Yea, I know you can hear me! Stop typing on your stupid little keyboard and listen up! I want a party, and I’m not jumping through anymore hoops until I get one!”

There was no response. And why would there be? Pinkie knew quite well that she was yelling at an empty sky like a madmare. She understood that she probably seemed one-hundred percent batshit crazy, but when had that ever stopped her?

“Enough with the insults,” she yelled. “Party, now! I don’t care what you have to do! Round up the usual suspects, violate the Prime Directive, paint me a Birmingham, whatever! Just give me a reason to party or I swear I’LL DRAG YOU IN THROUGH THAT MONITOR, TIE YOU DOWN AND FORCE-FEED YOU CAKE UNTIL FROSTING COMES OUT YOUR EARS!”

Just then, whether in pure luck or out of fear of death by pastry, the moon peeked out from behind the clouds. Pinkie’s eyes widened as a thought came into her head. Possibly the greatest plan to have been plotted by any pony who had ever schemed a scam.

There was something calming about the night. Perhaps it was how the sky opened wide like a canvas, spotted with millions of bright, twinkling stars. Perhaps it was the somber darkness that covered the land, muting all the colors into uniform shadow. Perhaps it was how the world below lay quiet and asleep, with only the gentle breeze whistling through the streets.

Whatever the reason, this time of night lent itself to quiet introspection. It was peaceful, tranquil, and boring as hell.

Princess Luna sighed and blew a stray bit of mane out of her eyes. Crossing her forelegs on the railing, she leaned out over her balcony and counted the streetlights below for the seventeenth time.

She did not regret her station, nor her duties. She knew that the task of raising the moon and ruling the night was an important one, and she felt it was both an honor and a pleasure to do so.

That was not to say that she enjoyed the mind-numbingly dull hours before sunrise, however. Once the main elements of the Canterlot nightlife dried up after one a.m., her vigil became tedious in the extreme. On the level of excitement, it was somewhere between watching grass grow and paint dry, and the paint was only worse because of its smell.

Turning her gaze up to the sky, Luna smiled as a shooting star flashed across the heavens. In a bit of childish indulgence, she closed her eyes and wished for something exciting to liven up her nightlife.

She had no idea her request was about to be granted.

Because somewhere, far away, two hands hovered over a keyboard. Slowly, sadistically, they began to type.

Luna was on the verge of dozing off when a flash of movement came from her right. Her head spun to the side, eyes widening in shock.

A dark shape was climbing up and onto her balcony. It was an earth pony, dressed in black from head to hoof. Its gaze met hers, and she could see bright blue eyes glinting maniacally from the slits in its mask.

The pony leapt over the railing and pointed a hoof at her. “AHA! There you are,” it said. “I’ve got you now!”

Luna gasped. An assassin! Acting on instinct, she jumped back towards the open door and braced her legs. Her horn lit up with a flash, and she prepared to strike the intruder down.

But her assailant was faster. Reaching behind its back, it pulled out a large cannon-like device from… somewhere. Before she could react, it planted the weapon on the ground, aimed and fired.

The blast caught Luna in the chest, sending her flying back into the room. She landed on her bed, ears ringing, head spinning, and with pieces of… confetti… falling around her.

Lifting her head, she could see the black-masked pony bouncing towards her. Stopping at the bed, it looked her over, and Luna winced in anticipation of the killing blow.

The pony whipped off its mask, revealing a pink-coated mare with a raspberry mane.

“SURPRISE!”

Luna gaped in astonishment as the pony giggled and squirmed out of her sneaky stealth suit.

“Hahahaha, that was the best prank ever! I can’t wait to tell Dashie about this! You were all ‘Eek!’ and I went ‘Rawr, we meet at last!’ and then you were about to go ‘Pew, Pew, Zap!’ but I was all ‘Kaboom!’ and then you were like ‘Oh, woe is me!’ but then I said ‘Boo!’ and now you’re all ‘HUH?’”

Luna scowled and slid off the mattress. “IMPUDENCE! What madness hast taken thee, to accost thy princess in such a manner,” she thundered. “We demand to know thy name, varlet, and what thine aim was in coming here!”

Pinkie snickered. “Wow, and I thought AJ talked funny! Come on, princess, you know me!

Luna only glared.

“Aw, you forgot? Oh well, I’ll give you a hint! Ooh, ooh, or TWO hints! Okay, here we go! The last time you saw me was on Nightmare Night! Remember me then, huh? You kept trying to introduce yourself and I’d scream and run away?”

That didn’t help much, as there were so many ponies running away from her at the time that Luna could scarcely remember one from the other.

“Everypony didst flee from our presence that night,” she remarked drily.

“Oh. Well, okay, that was a bad hint! I guess you can pass on that one! Okay! Here’s a replacement AND the second hint! Twilight and you lured me into an alley with candy so we could talk! I was dressed up as a chicken!”

Luna peered closer. Come to think of it, she did recognize this mare. They had indeed crossed paths several times that night, with unfortunate coincidences inevitably sending the earth pony racing away in fright.

Now she remembered! This was one member of that group that stopped her reign of terror as Nightmare Moon. Her irritation vanished, replaced by curiosity.

Satisfied with her conclusion, Luna asked, “Then thou art one of Twilight Sparkle’s friends? An Element of Harmony?”

She grinned. “Yep! I’m Pinkie Pie, the Element of Laughter, which also includes giggling, guffawing, chortling, chuckling and snickering. I’m also the queen of cupcakes, gator-wrangler extraordinaire, patron saint of ticklish tummies, and the party-hardiest pony to ever…”

“A true pleasure to meet thee again,” Luna interrupted. “But we doth not understand why thou hath come. Please, explain what deviltry hast brought thee at such an hour to intrude upon our domicile?”

Pinkie stared at her blankly, and Luna sighed. Choosing her words carefully, she tried again.

“Forgive us. What we meant to say is that while we are overjoyed you wished to visit us of your own free will and desire, we do not understand why you have come so late into the night.”

Pinkie’s face lit up. “Ooh, ooh, I almost forgot!” Reaching around, she pulled a large canvas bag out of seemingly nowhere. Digging inside, she quickly withdrew a card table, several boxes of board games, a ridiculously large stereo, a three-tiered chocolate cake, and what appeared to be a glass bowl filled with punch.

Turning back to the dumbstruck Luna, she threw out her hooves and announced, “I’m here to throw you a birthday party!”

Luna blinked, still trying to comprehend what in the hay was going on. When she wished for excitement, this wasn’t quite what she had in mind. Still, there was one problem with Pinkie’s idea.

“Well, this is certainly a kind and thoughtful gesture,” she said carefully, hoping that a polite refusal wouldn’t set this mare off. “But we regret to inform you that it is… poorly timed. You see, our birthday is still more than half a year in the future.”

If possible, Pinkie’s smile got even wider. “Oh, I know that! In fact, I counted on it! This isn’t just a birthday party, silly billy! It’s a make-up birthday party!”

“A… what?” Was this some new tradition that had originated during her banishment?

“A party to make up for the ones you missed,” Pinkie explained. “See, I was looking up at the moon earlier, right? And I thought, ‘Huh! How did Luna celebrate while she was stuck up there?’ Then I realized that you probably didn’t have very good options. You were probably sitting up there eating moon pies and whatever kind of nasty, stinky cheese the moon is made out of. And you probably had to give yourself presents, which stinks because you’d have already ruined the surprise knowing what they are, and then having to sing to yourself? Blah! What kind of party is that? So now you and I are gonna fix things!”

Though still bewildered, Luna quickly found herself warming up to the idea of a party. There was something infectious about Pinkie Pie’s mood; it was heart-warming and sincere the way she had planned this. Luna could see there was no hidden agenda, no attempt to flatter or cajole. She simply wanted to have fun, and to make Luna happy in the process.

And besides, it wasn’t like she had anything better to do…

“Very well,” Luna said. “We accept your offer of a party and will participate fully! What would you have us do?”

Pinkie clapped her hooves together. “Great! This is gonna be so so so so so fun! Okay, first thing! We can’t party alone, that’s a big no-no! So we need guests! Lots of guests!”

The earth pony’s brow furrowed. “But where do we get them this late at night? Is there somewhere we could order guests and have them delivered?”

Luna chuckled. “Leave that to us.” Moving to the door, she opened it and called down the hall.

“Leonid! Perseid! Attend me, please.”

Two unicorn guards marched into the room. Their stern expressions shifted into confusion when they saw their princess was in the company of a pink mare who was literally bouncing off the walls.

“Your highness… what the…”

“Woohoo! The boys are back in town! Now we can get this party rolling!”

Luna put a hoof on Pinkie’s back, halting her in mid-leap. “One moment, Miss Pie.” She turned to the guards. “We would be most grateful if you would gather all the guards currently on night patrol and request that they come at once to our chambers? We wish to reward them for their dedicated service.”

With a quick salute, the two raced down the hall. Within minutes, the room was full of unicorns and pegasi, each stallion looking about in barely concealed amazement.

Sharing a grin with Pinkie, Luna stood and addressed the crowd. “Loyal soldiers! In recognition of your devotion, we hereby decree that you all have the remainder of the night off, and invite you to celebrate until dawn with ourselves and our new friend Pinkie Pie!”

Jumping to the front of the crowd, Pinkie threw up her hooves. “Alright! Let’s get this party started! Raise the roof, guys!”

Taking the term literally, Luna removed her crown and tossed it into the air. “Do as she says!”

Several dozen helmets followed.

Three hours later, the party had finally devolved into a case of last mare standing. The royal bedroom had been turned upside-down. The bed was propped vertically against the wall. Eight unconscious stallions were piled atop the discarded mattress, two more were splayed across the table, one wearing the empty punch bowl as a jaunty hat. The rest of the squadron lay haphazardly about the room, most groaning and moaning while in the throes of a sugar crash. The walls were spattered with chocolate frosting; the floor was damp with spilled punch. Scattered everywhere were game pieces and bits of discarded armour.

It was a housekeeper’s worst nightmare. Rarity would’ve taken one look and ran for the hills. The royal guard, the toughest stallions in Equestria, were as incapacitated as frat colts during finals week. Born for combat, trained for war, they had been no match for the primal fury of a Pinkie Pie party. If the changelings had picked that moment to invade, they would have been faced with living speed bumps rather than actual challengers.

The two mares, however, showed no signs of stopping. Instead, they looked to be partying all the more furiously, as if trying to pick up the slack left by the guards.

Pinkie had confiscated Luna’s crown and necklace, and was now tripping over her own hooves as she tried to dance in the alicorn’s bulky shoes.

Luna was right beside her, using one hoof to keep her friend steady while the other used Pinkie’s ninja mask as a sock puppet, pretending to sing along to the still booming stereo, with amazingly cacophonous results.

It was pure chaos, the good kind, the type of stuff that would make Discord nod his head and beam in approval. But like all the best parties, it had to end before its time.

The door to Luna’s room swung open with a deafening bang. The assorted stallions were shaken out of their stupor, and the two mares turned to the new arrival with identical looks of guilty fright.

Celestia stood in the doorway. The alicorn’s mane was frazzled and sticking out in all directions. The robe over her nightgown was inside-out, the belt already coming loose. Her eyes were half-lidded and bleary, and she was glaring at the partygoers with the sort of angry disgust one would use after finding a particularly loathsome insect in one’s laundry basket.

If looks could kill, the entire room would have immediately burst into flames.

“It is four o’clock in the morning,” Celestia said through clenched teeth. “SOME of us have been trying to sleep, and this infernal racket has made it impossible!”

“What are you, foals whose parents have left home for the night,” she continued to rant. “Look at this room, no self-control at all! Such a mess! I ought to teach the lot of you a lesson!”

“Guards! On your hooves, now,” she barked. “Such uncouth behavior! I should reassign you all to manure detail in Baltimare!”

“And you,” she continued to Luna. “Is this the sort of mischief you cause at night? Well, it ends now! You are a princess, and you had best behave as such, or so help me I’ll put you right back on that moon so fast it will make your head spin!”

Lastly she turned to Pinkie, luckily not noticing Luna sticking out her tongue. “And you, Pinkie Pie! I expect you to keep these parties of yours under control! If this happens again, I’ll, I’ll, I’ll outlaw pastries forever! Ban them all from Equestria!”

Pinkie screamed in horror.

“This party is over, AM I UNDERSTOOD?”

She looked over each of them with a scathing glare. Luna was dragging a hoof over the carpet and avoiding her sister’s eyes while Pinkie hid behind her. The stallions were stumbling around the room and quietly retrieving their equipment.

Satisfied that she’d managed to scare the living shit out of them, Celestia nodded her head. “Good. Now, I am going back to bed. If I hear ONE peep in the next two hours…”

She left the threat hanging and stomped out of the room. Meekly, the guards followed suit, each one quietly thanking the mares as they left.

They waited until the last of Celestia’s hoofsteps faded into the distance. Hesitantly, Pinkie stepped out from behind Luna and peered around the room.

“Wow,” she said weakly. “She sure is mad at us, huh?”

To her surprise, Luna threw back her head and laughed. “It is nothing to be concerned about, dear Pinkie Pie.”

“But, but she threatened to send you back to the moon,” Pinkie argued. “And she was gonna outlaw pastries! That’s evil! EVIL!”

Luna patted her on the shoulder. “Empty threats, we assure you. You must understand, our sister leads a most stressful and busy life, and so she greatly covets the hours in which she is allowed to rest. If something disturbs that rest… well… she reacts quite harshly. We would almost certainly have done the same were you and her to have awakened us with a party.”

Some of the fear left Pinkie’s face. “So, it’s normal for her to act like a grouchy old nag if you wake her up early?”

Luna laughed again at the choice of words. “Indeed. Why, we remember one night long ago when a delegation from the zebra embassy made the mistake of holding a limerick contest directly beneath her window. She cursed at them like a sailor, vowing to declare war on their country if they did not cease and desist.”

The two shared another laugh before Luna stood, gently levitating her accessories off of Pinkie.

“Still, she is correct in saying that this party is over,” the princess admitted. “There are but a few hours remaining until dawn, and we still have duties that must be completed.”

Pinkie nodded and began shoveling objects back into her bag. After storing it… wherever the hell she stored it, she turned to Luna and smiled.

“Happy belated birthday, princess! I hope you enjoyed it.”

Luna smiled and pulled the earth pony into a hug. “It was absolutely wonderful, and we are most thankful for it.”

“Yay! I knew this was a great plan,” Pinkie blurted, bouncing out towards the balcony. “And if you liked tonight’s party, trust me, you’re gonna looooooooooooooove tomorrow’s!”

Luna balked. “Wha.. what do you… tomorrow?”

Pinkie nodded rapidly, her head blurring with motion. “Yep yep yep! That was just ONE missed birthday we replaced! There’s still nine hundred and ninety nine more parties to go! Then we’ll be caught up!”

Luna’s jaw dropped. She tried to stutter out a response, but her throat felt like it had seized up.

“Don’t worry,” Pinkie reassured her. “I’ll make sure to keep the noise down so Princess Celestia doesn’t scold us again! But trust me, each one of these parties will be twice as super as the last!”

With that, she swan-dived off the balcony and out of sight. Luna raced after her, expecting to see the earth pony plummeting towards the ground. But when she looked over the railing, there was no sign of her.

Luna stepped back, wondering just what she had gotten herself into. One-thousand parties? She had barely survived the first!

Suddenly, she found herself wondering if quiet, peaceful, boring nights weren’t so bad after all.

Alright, that's part one of this twoshot. The second installment should be arriving within the next week, detailing Luna's noble but increasingly futile efforts to contain the force of nature that is Pinkie Pie.

See you then!