Stevie Stone's Strange Story

by InsaneInTheMembrane

Rating: teen
Tags: Random, Human, Comedy
Length: 2897

Stevie Stone tell a story to the mane six and the CMC.

Strange Music's own Stevie Stone tell a weird story to ponies.

Random ass shit and hardee har hars ensues.

—————

Take this story however you want. I don't give a fuck.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2013-03-20 21:36:22 UTC

Stevie Stone still stays strong

Once upon a time, in the far away town of Strangeland, a young unicorn woke up startled from his deep sleep. Panting heavily, with sweat dripping down from his back and his face, he looked around to what he thought was his bedroom.

Unfortunately, for the colt’s dismay, he wasn’t in his bedroom anymore, but, if he could guess, there was a greater chance that he wasn’t in his apartment. Looking at all the weird stuff in the surroundings, he could make out some strange black dragon symbols that occupied all the blood red walls in the small room.

He also saw several posters on the wall, all of them different from one another - from a black man with a white painted face with the word ‘RAGE’ on his forehead, to another man, with a longer face and a machete near his face, with blood marks on it. There was even a poster with two creatures that he thought were the creepiest - one of them had white irises and ‘The Deevil’ tattooed on his neck and a devilish smile, and the other one with a bird-like mask with a long yellow and orange beak. Underneath every one single one of those pictures were what seemed like the town he was in, and a warning:

‘Welcome to Strangeland. NO HATERS’

Confused and with no knowledge of anything that had occurred during his sleep, he tried to piece together the events of last night to see if there was any connection to his current location. Sadly, the stallion couldn’t remember anything, because every time he envisioned his past, an oddly hypnotic voice would always invade his mind, and stop his thoughts, and every time, he chanted. The unicorn couldn’t understand most of the things that he said, from the speed that it was going, but he understood enough to know ‘Who do I catch now?’ and ‘They treat me like I got a red nose’ were two of the main things.

Feeling as though he wasn’t getting anywhere anytime soon, the colt did the next thing that came to his mind – get a drink.

With a sigh of frustration, he threw the covers off of him, and jumped out of bed… only to find his face colliding with the bedside table. The action caught him by surprise as he quickly rubbed the damaged area, moaning in pain, eyes tightly close, while the table just sat there… like an inanimate object.

After a moment of pain and anger filled muffled out curses, the stallion opened his eyes to look at the nightstand in anger. How he wanted to tear that wood splinter by splinter, burn down its house to ashes, murder its children until they were a bloody mess, rape its table wife and-

all of his rage towards the piece of furniture slipped out of his mind after he noticed a very conveniently placed glass of… liquor – it seemed like it – on the nightstand. ‘Awesome, booze!’ the stallion thought before using his hooves to pick up the glass - completely disregarding the fact that he had a horn - and gulp down the beverage in a swift motion.

His face then contorted into one of disgust. The unicorn proceeded to spit out any content of the drink left on his mouth onto the hardwood floor, creating a small pool of slightly reflective whatever that was.

He started franticly scrubbing his tongue with his hooves – again, completely forgetting he had a horn – to get the bad taste out of his mouth. That wasn’t booze. That wasn’t booze AT ALL. It tasted like some kind of a… energy drink of sorts. Boy did he HATE energy drinks.

Finally, after having enough tongue scrapping, he trotted out of the bedroom and onto the streets of the mysterious city.

The outside was the strangest place that the blue unicorn has ever been.

He had seen weird things about the weather before, but none of them could compare to the weather there. The entire sky was enveloped in a deep red, giving the appearance that the clouds had been absorbing a large amount of blood from unknown origins. The several tall, modernized buildings that literally scrapped the sky with their roofs, along with the roads, were both a dull, but somehow sick, grey, and a sinister, evil black color that covered them with an evil aura that could be felt from a million miles away.

The streets and the shops through the horizon in view were paved in the same shade of unholy grey – one that the stallion was growing to despise. The bipedal creatures that were walking on the pavements looked lifeless in the eyes of the unicorn – them not really going anywhere or doing anything, just… walking aimlessly.

As he started to trotted on the same path that they were, the attention that he was getting was growing stronger by the minute as they slowly turned to the source of the light clopping sounds that hit the floor. Immediately the stallion’s confusion turned into full-blown fear – the monotonous eyes that stared at him were as white as themselves. Their pale faces that were completely devoid of life showed no emotion towards the strange horse that they were looking at. They weren’t even thinking where it can from or anything like it, all they wanted to know was if it was hater.

The creatures stood there and watched his every move, as if they were expecting him to run away.

Fortunately, he didn’t do that.

He did something else.

Something much worse.

“WHAT THE HAY IS GOING ON HERE?” he shouted angrily to the heavens – if there was any. “If there is at least one pony to tell what the buck is going on here, I would very much appreciate it.” The creatures took that as a sign of hate as they surrounded the misunderstood stallion.

The unicorn, who previously wanted to get out of this Celestia forsaking place, now he wanted to REALLY get out of this Celestia forsaking place when he had gathered a crowd around himself. Not wanting to die in an unfamiliar town, he tried to use his magic to move them all out of his way, but he found the incapability of doing anything with magic. He tried again, but nothing happened. Again, and nothing. Again, and something did happen… no wait, that was just a spark.

By this time, the creatures had already taken a firm grip on different parts of the pony’s body. The blue stallion thrashed and shuffling out of their hold for salvation, but all he do was scream and shout with all of the breath that his lungs could take.

It was futile.

Then they took him to Brotha Lynch Hung’s chamber, where he was mutilated, eviscerated and eliminated.

“The end.” said Stevie Stone as he finished his tall tale, closing the book that was on his lap, with a smile on his face. Shuffling his position on the couch in Twilight’s library, he turned to his audience for the happy grins that he always saw on the ponies’ faces, but instead, he only got one – from Rainbow Dash. The rest were filled with scared expressions, shaken little bodies … and a certain missing pegasus. His smile never left his face as he chuckled. “Creepy, isn’t it?”

Slowly, all of them nodded, unable to come up with any sort of response to the question thanks to the MC’s story – which most of them are regretting to listen to in the first place. Rainbow Dash was the first to speak up after a moment of silence. “That was so awesome.” her excited demeanor was not transmitted to the rest of the group as they stared at the rainbow-maned pegasus in shock. Rainbow noticed them. “What? I like scary stories.” She then turned to Stevie. “You really have a knack for writing.”

Stevie chuckled once again. “Oh no, I didn’t write this.” he stated in a matter-of-factly. ”Travis did. I think he was trying to test out his writing skills for a book… I think.” Unsure about his answer, he continued with a dismissive hand. “Whatever it is, he keeps it secret for some reason.”

“I think it’s pretty cool. Can I get a copy?”

Stevie patted her head as he laughed. “When I come back, I will give you one.” Rainbow squealed out as a reply, causing Stevie to d’aw. As Rainbow returned to the group with a smile, the rapper turned to the rest of the girls. “So, what did you all think?”

The CMC raised their hooves simultaneously, but Rarity beat them and was the first to speak up. “Well, darling,” Behind her, the three fillies sat down with humph, their forelegs crossed on their chests. “although I do like the… creativity and the author’s way with his words, and I adore the way that he portrays something that somepony else created, but I can’t find myself liking something like that.” her eyes went wide at this. Feeling as though she insulted him, Rarity corrected herself with a flail of her forelegs. “I mean it’s not like I didn’t like it but… it’s not my kind of story.” She smiled sheepishly.

Stevie smiled at her. “Hey, everyone’s got their own preferences on certain kinds of things. It’s completely normal.” Rarity sighed in relief before sitting back down. Stevie was about to let another pony ask him a question until realization struck him. “Where’s Fluttershy?”

A shaky yellow hoof appeared behind Applejack. “I’m r-right h-here.” Applejack moved out the way to see a cowering and shaking Fluttershy on the floor. When the shy pegasus saw that everypony was looking at her, she eeped and dashed back to Applejack’s back (Tech N9ne would be proud of me).

Applejack pushed her back to her former spot with one of her hind legs “C’mon sugercube, ya’ don’ need t’ be afraid. Ah’m pretty sure that that Strangeland huey ain’t real.” she glared at the MC. “Is it?”

Even though he knew that Strangeland wasn’t real, he was still afraid at the mare’s glare. “Y-Yeah, that place isn’t real at all.” he said in panic. “It’s just the title of one of my friend’s album that he made for our label, that’s all.” he laughed nervously in the end. He could still remember the day where he ended up in Equestria. The scars (soreness) on his soul and heart (dick and head) shall always be a constant reminder of his struggles (stupidity) throughout the land (he was stealing apples from Sweet Apple Acres).

The new information made Fluttershy calm down and come out of her ‘protective’ shell. Applejack turned towards the MC and gave a single nod as if to say ‘Thank you, I would’ve kicked your ass if you didn’t do that’. The Rollin’ Stone sighed in relief, quickly changing the subject. “Next question?”

Once again, the fillies were about to ask their question but Twilight stepped in their way. “Yes, I have two.” Moans and grunts sounded behind her, and she ignored it. “Why did the story end like that? Surely the author didn’t write that as an ending.”

He hissed, rearranging the sideways hat on his head with one hand. Stevie dreaded that one of them was going to ask that. “Yeah… about that.” he got close to her and whispered in her ear. “That was where it got really graphic, and I didn’t want to give the fillies any nightmares.”

Twilight nodded. “Ok, and two, who is this… ‘Brother Lunch hang’?”

The one whose voice could be confused with Rainbow Dash’s if it was female chuckled (he’s doing that a lot lately). ”No, you’re pronouncing it wrong. It’s ‘Brotha Lynch Hung’, and he’s one of the rappers in tech’s group.” Once Stevie had answered her questions, she took a seat in her usual spot. “So, anypony else got anymore question?”

“Wedowedowedowedowedo.” Said the CMC, bouncing in their places, finally taking their chance to gain knowledge.

“What would you three like to know?”

“Ah was wondering what… wait, no that’s not it… why did… who…” Applebloom stumbled on her own words as she tried to remember what she was going to ask. “What was it again?”

Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle opened their mouth to respond, but closed them once they couldn’t figure it out either. The fillies rubbed their chins in thought, trying to come up with the simplest of things to see if they trigger something in their memories.

After a moment of dead silence, Stevie inquired “You know, I can’t stay in here for much longer. I really need to go back to my world and get on with my life.” The cutie mark crusaders sighed in desperation from that statement, but the rapper quickly reassured them. “But you don’t need to worry. Whatever it is, I think it can wait for my comeback.”

Sweetie Belle gazed him with her trademark puppy eyes and the sad smile. “Are you sure you’re gonna come back, Mr. Stone?” Applebloom and Scootaloo joined in on the puppy look and did their deadliest move ever – The Diabetes Cannon. Boy did Stevie hate that. It was just too adorable. He could swear every time they did that he could feel his heart literally melt.

“Hey, don’t you do that. You know what that does to me.” They giggled, he cursed the parents who raised them. “But seriously, I am definitely gonna be back. Don’t you forget it.” He then turned to Twilight. “Twilight, if you may?” Twilight nodded. Her horn starting glowing purple before a portal appeared in the middle of the tree house. Stevie turned to his friends. “Well, it’s been fun hangin’ out with all you. I’ll see you next time.”

All of them bid the MC farewell before he walked to the portal. Just before jumping, he looked at the fillies. “Do you still remember what I told you when you’re confronted by a bully?”

The CMC gasped, somehow remembering that but not the thing before… weird. “Keep my name out your mouth, girl.”Their yelling could be heard by the ponies outside.

“And?”

“GET BUCK!”

“Alright.” With a wave of a hand and a ‘goodbye’ to everypony, the performer who was featured in the ‘Midwest explosion’ video with Tech N9ne jumped trough the portal and disappeared from sight.

Then karma decided to screw with their minds.

Applebloom looked at her friends. “Girls, ah jus’ remembered what we were supposed t’ ask ‘em.”

“Me too.”

“Me too.”

…

“BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-“

Pinkie pie burst through the library, interrupting the CMC’s raging shout, with her trademark party cannon, confetti, cake – you know, her party supplies, probably for a party emergency. “Hey, Mr. Stone, your story was so cool that I just HAD to throw you a party for how AWESOME it was. I got cake, cupcakes, muffins, cakes- Oh wait, I already said cakes, but I didn’t say that I had two cakes that-“ Pinkie’s insane rambling stopped once she noticed that Stevie Stone was no longer inside. “-hey, where did he go?”

What the- two pinkies? How did that happen?

The Pinkie that was sitting near the girls deflated like a balloon.

Ooooh.

And they laughed.

Back in the StrangeMusic HQ, Stevie Stone was sitting on his desk, casually flipping through the book that his boss made. He scanned every detail, every action and expensive word that he used to accomplish something that everyone in the independent label thought it was impossible. And yet…

… they were all wrong

He laughed.

The story that he told the ponies was not entirely. Yes, there was somepony who was in a place he wasn’t the night before. There was somepony who didn’t like energy drinks. There was somepony who didn’t like that place one bit.

The only difference was – it wasn’t some’pony’. He can thank the rap game for his freestylin’ skills

“Hey Stevie,” Tech N9ne called out on the office’s door. “where the hell have you been, man?”

Stevie snapped his thought out of the book and looked at Tech. “I’ve been doin’ things.”

“What kinda things?”

“… manly things.”

Tech only stared with a raised brow at Stevie Stone for his strange reply, but then shook his head. “Ya know what, whatever the fuck that is I don’t give a shit.” he said dismissively. “C’mon, we gotta get ready for the tour.”

“A’ight, but before you go, could you tell Travis to get me a copy of his book?”

Tech furrowed his eyebrows. ”Why the fuck would I ask ‘em that?

“Because… my kids liked the story.” Was the best lie he could come up with. Surely, saying that his kids enjoy scary and very graphic stories for fun is completely normal… right? Although, now that he thinks about it, he could’ve said his wife.

“Your kids‘re weird.” he laughed at the lie, believing it was the truth. Safe- “I guess they get that from their dad.”- but insulted. As Tech left Stevie’s office, the Rollin’ Stone got prepared for the Independent Powerhouse tour, silently praying to God that Rainbow was gonna get what’s coming to her.

Question

Should I make this into a series about rappers coming to Equestria?