I Have No Idea What I'm Doing
“I have no idea what I’m doing.”
Lyra thought to herself as she sat at a picnic table. She was attending a get together that Pinkie Pie had planned. It wasn’t her usual party; this was just a simple camp out. There were plenty of ponies walking around and just having fun. Lyra however was stuck at the table sitting next to her fillyfriend, or at least the pony considered her fillyfriend. She wasn’t quite so sure about the relationship anymore. Her fillyfriend had become emotionally abusive, getting upset if she so much as talked to another pony. Lyra hadn’t initially wanted her to come to the camp out, as she knew it would just make things awkward for her and for anypony involved. So she sat there, not talking to anypony because if she did she’d get her head chewed off.
That however, is when she was surveying the crowd of ponies gathered around and saw her. Right away she knew there was something different about this pony. The way her cream coat reflected the light, the way her pink and purple mane curled around her hair. The way her cutie mark of… bows? Candies? Well whatever it was of, it looked damn good on her flank. Lyra wanted to get to know this pony. Even if she could never manage to pull herself out of her nose-diving relationship, she wanted to know that she at least met this pony. At least let the pony know she existed. The problem that Lyra ran into was that she couldn’t just go up and talk to her; this would make her fillyfriend furious. It didn’t help that Lyra also found herself flustered, feeling too shy to go up and talk to this pony while she talked to other ponies she obviously knew more. So for the time being, Lyra just sat there and played on the lyre that someone had donated to the charity auction.
It was the last day of the camp out. Lyra sat on the curb next to her “fillyfriend” (Lyra wasn’t too happy with her at this point; she had thrown a pretty bad fit at the camp out over nothing). She was waiting for her ride, Colgate, to finally be done talking to all of the ponies to just take her home. She sat there upset and tired, when who should sit beside her but that incredibly attractive mare she had seen earlier. Lyra again found herself flustered and nervous, but knew that if she didn’t say anything now, she might as well be making sure she never saw her again. Lyra reached down deep for the last bit of courage she could muster, and introduced herself.
“Hey there, my name is Lyra. What’s your name?”
“Oh hi Lyra! My name is Bon Bon!”
“Bon Bon, eh? That’s a pretty awesome name! So what do you Bon Bon?”
“Well, as my cutie mark of candies may suggest, I make and sell candies! Nothing official or business-y at the moment, just make them when I have free time.”
“Ah ha! They’re candies! Not bows!”
“Yeah, they’re candies. Wait, bows? Who says they’re bows?
“I dunno, somepony in the second paragraph brought that up. I don’t know where they got the idea.”
“Anyway… So what do you do Lyra?”
“Well, as my cutie mark may suggest, I play the lyre! I have only played one or two shows in front of ponies, but I practice a lot at my house.”
“That’s awesome! Well Lyra, I have to go now. I hope to hear from you! Maybe you can play some lyre for me someday!”
“That would be awesome! And I’d love to try some of your candies!”
“Alright! See you later Lyra!”
“See you, Bon Bon!”
As Bon Bon left, Lyra sat there a little more elated than she was. She was still stuck in the dumps about her current failing relationship, and just completely lost on what to do next. She sighed and placed her head in her hooves, too tired to think of what to do now.
“I have no idea what I’m doing.”
I Have No Idea What I'm Doing
Lyra sat at her desk, head resting on it, eyes closed, thinking. She had been through a lot in the past couple of months. It was now about 3 months since she had broken up with her “fillyfriend”. Since then she thought she had found someone else who was nice, but that ended abruptly when the mare decided to randomly stop talking to her. Then she did it a second time. Lyra was at the end of her chain, she had no idea what to feel anymore. Her heart had been broken too many times in a short period of time, and she had no idea where to go from there. She had been trying incredibly hard to get a job to pay her bills, but it just seemed like no matter how hard she worked to get one, no one wanted to hire her. She tried her best to keep practicing her lyre and write new songs, but it was just hard when all she could do was thinking about the pain she felt.
“I don’t even feel like trying to play my lyre tonight. I’m feeling particularly bad. Maybe I should just go to bed.”
But as Lyra was getting ready to go to bed, she heard a knocking at her door.
“Who in the hell could that be? It’s the middle of the night…”
Lyra walked over to the door and opened it up for the middle of the night intruder. Standing there at the door was Colgate, one of Lyra’s closest friends, despite the fact that they hadn’t really hung out since the camp out. It’s not that they didn’t want to, it just never panned out. This made the fact that she randomly showed up at her doorstep in the middle of the night all the more odd.
“Colgate? What are you doing here in the middle of the night?”
“Hey Lyra! What have you been up to? Can I come in for a bit?”
“Uh… sure I suppose…”
Lyra stepped aside and let Colgate come in and find a nice place to sit.
“Thanks Lyra. How have you been? It’s been a while since we’ve hung out.”
Lyra dreaded this question. She never liked lying to her friends, but she just didn’t want to take the time or deal with the pain of recounting her last couple of months.
“Oh, you know, just been busy. Working on music stuff mostly.”
“Really? Have you written anything new?”
“Well I’ve got a couple pieces I’ve been working on, but nothing finished.” Lyra sat down in her own seat and remembered what she asked Colgate initially. “But back to my previous question, what are you doing here in the middle of the night?”
Colgate sat up in her chair enthusiastically. “Well, I wanted to know if you wanted to join me in some urbex!”
“Urbex? What’s that?”
“Well… urbex is where you go and explore abandoned buildings! It’s really neat; you never know what you’re going to find!”
“Wouldn’t that be illegal or something?”
“Not unless they have a No Trespassing sign up, or it’s locked! If the building is unlocked, it’s not technically illegal.”
Lyra sat back in her chair and thought about this. On one hoof, this activity was borderline illegal and quite possibly dangerous. But on the other hoof, it was true that she was stuck in a depressing rut, and this urbex thing seemed like a nice way to hop out of that rut. Plus she hadn’t hung out with Colgate in a long time, and she could use some companionship right now.
“Hmm… alright Colgate. I’ll go urbexing with you! Just tell me what I need to bring, and we can go at it!”
Colgate stood up from her chair, excited.
“Alright! Don’t worry Lyra; I’ve got a perfect place in mind. It’s where I take all the first timers! It’s long since abandoned, and it’s unlocked, so it’s not even illegal!”
Lyra got all the supplies she would need together in her saddle bags, and they were off for the abandoned factory that Colgate wouldn't stop talking about since Lyra agreed to go. Lyra was unsure what to think of what was going on and was unsure as to what would happen; all she knew was that she needed to do something with herself, and she might as well start here. She stepped out of her house behind Colgate and closed the door behind her, leaving her house to go do something she never thought she would do.
