Mushroom Cloud: Hopeless

Mushroom Cloud awoke in the guest bedroom of Fluttershy’s cottage again. Cloud really wanted a place of her own, just she wouldn’t be able to afford it until she got a steady job. Being a student was going to be rough for a while, so Fluttershy decided to let her stay as long as she needs. Cloud felt bad about using Fluttershy’s hospitality, so she had begun to help out with some of the nocturnal animals and staying up late. She hasn’t been able to really sleep lately anyways.

Cloud had a killer headache slowly forming into a migraine, and was trying to collect her thoughts, but her head was pounding too hard. She looked around to see the sun was already up, and could hear Fluttershy singing with her birds outside. She could really use a cup of tea. She rolled out of bed to sort of flop on the floor and struggled to stand up. She was exhausted; it must be from the day or two before when she flew all the way from Cloudsdale. Her wings ached, her hooves ached, and even her eyes felt like they were going to pop out of her head. She slowly made her way to the bathroom to take a quick shower. She turned the water on and let the warm water run over the back of her neck and down to her wing's joints. She stretched them out and heard a small crack. She folded them back in and sat for just a few minutes to plan what she should do today. In her head she imagined that she would go into town to buy Fluttershy a gift, and from there try to learn the towns lay out. Zecora asked for a few days to get everything ready for her to learn the art of potion making. She would then return to take her shift for the nocturnal animals.

Her thoughts then took a turn and begun to think about her father, her headache finally tipped over to a migraine. Her blood boils at the very thought of her father, and then she finally opened her eyes. She gave out a sigh.

“What are you doing?” She closed her eyes and took a few deep breaths. The warm air lifting up past her face filled her nose and felt relaxing. She shut off the water and hopped out of the shower, dried off, and brushed her mane out. It didn’t require too much work; it was short enough to really just run her hoof through. Her short hair derived from a guy she once knew. He was kind and sweet, and she even tried to attract him, but to no avail. She cut her mane short, because he liked mares with short hair. He just gave her one look over, and went about his day. She felt oddly abandoned because of it. She liked the short hair, and just kept it that way.

She opened the bathroom door, and decided to head back in her room for one more glance over at her body.

“Ugh…” She hated her body, she wish she could be something else. She hated the fact her body wasn’t slim and sleek, and she hated the fact she wasn’t very tall. Her wings felt like they were oversized for her body type and that her face was too wide. All of these features about herself she hated. She really was one depressing looking pony. No wonder she was named Rain Cloud. She then picked up a small bag off her side table. She threw it in her saddlebag witch then it made a rattle noise. It was her life savings and it as enough to live with for a while. She put her saddle bag on, and gave a yawn. She didn’t ever get good sleep.

As many problems as Cloud had, she was always determined to make things better, even if they kept getting worse. She decided to go downstairs to make a pot of tea. She then looked out the kitchen window to see Fluttershy tending to her rodent pets. She noticed Cloud and gave her a smile and mouthed out the words ‘good morning.’ Cloud forced a smile back and even a wave. She then went back about her business of making tea, she had become an addict for it now. It kept her body warm, and somehow made her headaches subside pretty well.

Cloud had just threw her bag aside, and sat down to start drinking her tea. Then there was a knock at the door. It startled her a little. ‘Who could that be this early?’ She trotted over to the door and opened the door slightly. She gave a quick glance and recognized the pony as being Twilight.

“Oh, good Morning Twilight.” Mushroom opened the door all the way, she recognized her from the party Pinkie threw the other night.

“Hey there Cloud!” Twilight gave her a smile.

“Fluttershy is out back.” Cloud assumed that’s why she was here.

“Actually, I wanted to talk to you.” Twilight lost her smile, and she had a more serious look on her face.

‘Uh Oh’ Cloud thought. “Sure, what could it be?” She stepped out of the doorway to allow Twilight to step inside.

“I feel like there is a lot that you might need help with. I was wondering is there anything I can do. After all I am supposed to be learning about the magic of friendship.” Twilight came in and turned towards Cloud. “I mean it just seems like you’ve faced more than just a little hardship.” Cloud was a little confused, she didn’t remember telling Twilight anything like that.

Cloud closed the door and replied “Well, no I am feeling fine.” She lied through her teeth, and must not have been very convincing, because Twilight looked skeptical.

“Look, you don’t have to put up a defense against me. I am just trying to help.” Cloud got a little angered by this.

“No, I am fine.” Cloud's voice was more serious. “I don’t need to spill out my emotions, they bring up bad memories. Honestly, the only thing I can do is focus on bettering myself, and no amount of talking is going to help.” Twilight furrowed her brow, and just looked at Cloud. Cloud did just about the same thing.

Twilight gave a sigh, she rearranged her face to look concerned with a hint of seriousness. “What is your problem? I am trying to connect with you in order to be your friend.” She then gave her a more concerned look.

“Look, I find it hard to trust anypony really, Fluttershy just caught me in a moment of weakness.” Cloud looked down. “I don’t have any friends because this is what I do. I put up defenses in order to keep myself inside and away from the world around me.” Twilight cracked a tiny grin.

“There you go, it doesn’t matter the problem. Look, I know it’s hard to trust new people. I had just made friends with the girls, and finding out that they are the elements of harmony is a weird experience to have with strangers you hardly know. I had to step up, and put my trust into every single one of them, even when I didn’t fully trust them. Sometimes friendship is forced upon you, and you never really get a chance to say no. Lucky for you, you have the opportunity to make friends, and if I were you, I wouldn’t blow it.” Twilight patted Cloud on the shoulder, which made Cloud look up. She had tears welling up, and she quickly wiped them away.

“Thank you Twilight; I’ll keep that in mind.” Cloud was being sincere about that; it’s the first time she realized she actually had a choice in her life about who she befriends, and that the ponies around her wouldn’t discriminate against her. That thought actually relieved the stress she had been feeling for a couple of days now. She didn’t consider herself friends with any of these ponies until now.

“No problem, and like I said, if you need any help at all, please don’t hesitate to ask.” Twilight made her way to the door, and this kind of saddened Cloud.

“Wait.” Cloud called out, making Twilight turned around, “Would you maybe show me around Ponyville, I kind of want to talk a little more.” She felt embarrassed, but she really did need to know the layout of Ponyville a little better, and seeing as how she had time to kill waiting on Zecora to get everything ready for her.

Twilight gave her a smile, “Of course I can do that.”