Fifty Shades of Twidash

by Silvernis

Rating: mature
Tags: Slice of Life, Sex, Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Romance
Length: 4734

A simple "slice-of-clop" collection featuring kinky Twidash.

A simple "slice-of-clop" collection featuring kinky Twidash.

NSFW, read at your own risk, etc. Contains light BDSM.

Updated when I feel like it and have chapters to add.

Original artwork by v-invidia. Defaced with stupid title by me.

Published 2013-01-11 05:30:02 UTC
Last updated 2013-04-12 05:53:03 UTC

All Good Things

ALL GOOD THINGS

Rainbow Dash was fast. She loved it, too, loved the total rush of hurtling through life and looking back to see the world dazed and amazed in her wake. On general principle, she simply didn’t do slow (naps and new Daring Do novels excepted). She didn’t like taking her time, waiting, or being patient.

. . . all of which made Twilight’s new game absolutely maddening.

“C’mon, Twi,” she whined, fidgeting on the end of the bed. “I’ve been waiting all day for this. What the buck are you doing?”

The unicorn chuckled and continued circling the bed. “Trying to teach you some patience, little Miss Ten Seconds Flat.”

Rainbow scowled. Patience wasn’t really going to work, not when Twilight was wearing those plum-colored socks and bobbing her shapely little plot back and forth as she sauntered around the bed. Rainbow felt a familiar warmth starting to grow between her back legs.

Twilight flashed her a knowing smirk, then slowly, deliberately, lifted her tail, leaning forward and splaying her back legs for maximum effect.

Rainbow’s wings flared noisily. “Screw patience!” she shouted. She dove off the end of the bed, aiming for that delicious purple slit—or rather, she tried to. She got within a hoofspan of her goal before a familiar magic aura blazed to life around her, leaving her flailing helplessly in the air.

“No fair!” pouted Rainbow. “Twi, lemme go!”

Twilight waggled her just-out-of-reach rump, then straightened up and turned to face Rainbow. She gently kissed the suspended pegasus, then pulled back and looked at her.

“Do you want me, Rainbow Dash?” she asked in a throaty whisper.

“Yes,” Rainbow whispered back, drowning in those bottomless violet eyes.

“Do you need me?”

“Yes!”

Twilight kissed her again, deeper this time, curling her tongue around Rainbow’s. Rainbow moaned, her wings so stiff they hurt. She could feel a telltale wetness starting to trickle down her back legs.

All too soon, the unicorn pulled out, breathing heavily. “Do you need me right now, Rainbow Dash?”

“Yesyesyesyesyes!”

“Well, that’s too bad,” said Twilight, grinning wickedly and prancing back a step, “because you’re going to have to wait a bit.”

“What?” Rainbow howled. “Twilight, you—you dumb egghead!”

Twilight laughed and magically pushed the pegasus back onto the bed, belly up. Rainbow felt more ropes coil around each of her legs, slowly but inexorably pulling until she was fully stretched out. Another rope wrapped around her belly and wings, gradually tightening until her stiff wings were forced back against her flanks. She thrashed, but the knots were tight and unyielding.

Twilight hopped onto the bed and straddled her, leaning down to plant a delicate kiss on her nose. “Are you comfortable, Dashie?” asked the unicorn, her voice soft and serious.

“Yes,” whispered Rainbow, and, strangely enough, it was the truth. They’d been doing this for weeks now, and she still didn’t understand how being bound and helpless could be comfortable, but somehow it was. Lying here on Twilight’s bed, tied down and utterly vulnerable, with Twilight’s warm weight on top of her . . . it somehow felt safe.

“Good,” said Twilight. She pressed her body against Rainbow’s and kissed her again, and again, and again. Rainbow gasped as the kisses started sliding downward and Twilight began using her teeth. Ever so slowly, the unicorn wriggled backwards as she kissed and licked and nibbled her way down Rainbow’s neck and belly. She stopped abruptly just shy of the pegasus’s folds.

Rainbow whimpered. “Do it,” she begged. “I need you so bad, Twi. I wanna feel you.”

“Patience,” said Twilight. She ran her tongue lightly over Rainbow’s wet lips before pulling away again.

“Twilight, please!” shrieked the pegasus, yanking uselessly at the ropes. The heat inside of her was already pushing her to her limit. Every inch of her was consumed with hunger for this beautiful, teasing, stupid sexy unicorn.

“Patience,” said Twilight again. “We’re going to take our time tonight. After all, getting there is half the fun . . . ” She gave Rainbow another gentle lick. “ . . . and I promise you’ll like where we’re going.”

* * *

Rainbow didn’t know how long they’d been at it. All she knew was that her entire body was on fire and completely desperate for sweet release, release that Twilight still would not give her. All this time, the unicorn had kept her on the brink, on the very edge, dangling her over but never quite letting go. It was at once agonizing and amazing.

“Thirty-seven minutes!” Twilight cried, still ravaging the pegasus’s dripping slit with one hoof while the other worked frantically between her own legs. “You’ve—you’ve lasted thirty-seven minutes, Rainbow Dash! That’s—a new record!” She groaned and panted, obviously on the edge herself.

“Let me come!” begged Rainbow. “Pleasepleaseplease just finish me! I can’t take any more!”

“I think—you can last—a little longer!”

“Twilight!”

“Okay, okay!”

Twilight suddenly shoved her muzzle into Rainbow, took the pegasus’s nub between her teeth, and gently bit down.

Rainbow screamed. Waves of hot, electric ecstasy exploded through her, as if a sonic rainboom had just gone off in her very core. She shuddered and arched her back and heaved against her bonds as the sensation burned through every fiber of her being. After a long minute, she finally fell back onto the bed, happy and utterly drained. Her breath came in ragged gasps.

Twilight, looking similarly exhausted, slowly dragged herself up and collapsed next to Rainbow, wrapping her sock-covered legs around the pegasus and snuggling against her.

They lay like that for a while in comfortable silence. Eventually, Rainbow turned her head and smiled tiredly at Twilight.

“You were right,” she said. “I did like it. That was . . . incredible.”

Twilight kissed her, and Rainbow could taste her own wetness on the unicorn’s lips. “See, Dashie?” she said, smiling back. “Patience.”

“Lesson learned, mistress.”

Twilight giggled. “Speaking of which, let me get you loose.” Her horn glowed, and Rainbow felt the ropes start to move.

“Wait,” said the pegasus. “Just . . . leave it for now.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. I just . . . wanna be here like this for a while. With you.” Rainbow grinned, closed her eyes, and leaned her head against Twilight’s. “I wanna take my time with you.”

Applebuckin'

APPLEBUCKIN'

As the supremely cheesy title should indicate, this short features a special "guest appearance"
by everyone's favorite hat-wearing, tree-kicking, lasso-twirling mare. Enjoy!

Applejack felt her breath quicken uneasily as the rope tightened around her, binding her forelegs to her sides and forcing her to sit back on her haunches. It was . . . well, a peculiar sensation. The rope was strange, too, soft and supple and completely unlike the rough hemp she’d always used around the farm.

“I—I’m not sure about this, Twi,” she blurted out, her normally strong voice quavering a little.

Twilight’s horn immediately stopped glowing, and the rope went slack.

“It’s okay,” said the unicorn. She whisked the rope away and gave Applejack a kindly smile. “We don’t have to do this if you don’t want to.”

“Aw, c’mon, AJ!” shouted Rainbow Dash from across the barn. “You know you wanna!” The pegasus was already trussed up, standing upright on tip-hoof against one of the big columns supporting the roof. Her rear legs were spread wide, held in place by an old broom handle, while her forelegs were tied above her head. A thick strap around her middle held down her wings.

“Quiet, you,” said Twilight. She jerked Rainbow’s tail with her magic; the pegasus yelped and fell silent, though she kept grinning at Applejack. “This isn’t a joke, Rainbow Dash,” continued the unicorn. “We are not doing this if Applejack isn’t comfortable with it. Is that clear?”

“Yes, ma’am.” The grin disappeared, and Rainbow’s face went carefully neutral.

Twilight smirked ever so slightly, and Applejack felt a sudden twinge of heat between her back legs. Her emerald eyes widened in surprise. That . . . that was hot, she thought, shocked at the realization. She knew Twilight was good at organizing and taking charge, but she’d never seen the unicorn get into it quite like that. And the way Dash had instantly complied, bound and helpless and obedient to the librarian . . .

Applejack shivered, and she realized it was from eager anticipation this time, not anxiety.

She took a deep breath, then said slowly, “Actually, RD’s right. I do wanna try.”

Rainbow winked at her, but otherwise remained motionless.

“You’re sure?” Twilight asked, her obvious eagerness tempered by even more obvious caution. “I don’t want you to feel pressured into this.”

Applejack nodded. “I’ll admit I’m a bit nervous, but . . . I really do wanna try this, and you two’re the only ponies I’d trust with it. Besides,” she added, grinning, “it might be fun.”

Twilight positively beamed.

“Just . . . two things,” continued Applejack on sudden impulse.

“What?”

The earth pony fidgeted. She could feel her face getting as red as the apples on her flanks. Eventually, she mumbled, “My hat.”

“Um . . . what about your hat?”

“I . . . Oh, I can’t believe I’m sayin’ this. I want you to wear it.”

Twilight looked surprised. “Really?”

Applejack nodded, flushed with embarrassment—and, she had to admit, more than a little nervous excitement.

“Well, if you want me to,” said Twilight. She took the hat in her magic, lifted it off the earth pony’s head, then set it on her own at a rakish angle. Grinning, she struck a pose clearly inspired by a cheesy cowpony film and asked, “How’s that?”

“Mighty nice,” said Applejack hoarsely. In truth, she thought Twilight looked a little ridiculous, but the simple fact that she was wearing Applejack’s hat was oddly arousing. Applejack had surrendered a piece of herself to the pretty purple unicorn, the same unicorn who would soon be doing Celestia-knew-what to her while wearing her own hat. The thought sent a shiver through her nethers.

Twilight’s sharp violet eyes noticed. Smiling knowingly, she stepped close, nearly touching her muzzle to Applejack’s.

“And the second thing?” she whispered. The earth pony could feel the unicorn’s warm breath on her nose.

Applejack fidgeted again, avoiding Twilight’s eyes. She opened her mouth, closed it, then opened it again and whispered back, “Use my rope.”

“Huh?”

“I want you to use my rope.” She pointed.

Twilight glanced over, and sure enough, there was a coil of rope hanging on a peg. She grabbed it with her magic and floated it over.

“This?” the unicorn asked, looking at it doubtfully. “It’s a little, uh, rough.”

Behind them, Rainbow cackled. “I bet that’s just how she likes it. Right, AJ?”

“Hush,” said Twilight over her shoulder, yanking Rainbow’s tail again. The pegasus groaned and wriggled, and Applejack thought she heard something drip to the floor. Twilight turned back to Applejack. “Are you sure, Applejack?”

The earth pony nodded. “I want that rope,” she muttered, mortified at the throaty hunger in her voice.

“Well, it’s a bit heavier than what I normally use,” said Twilight, “but I’m sure I can manage. Just remember, Applejack: if you want me to stop at any time, just say smartypants.”

Applejack couldn’t help chuckling. “Like yer crazy doll?”

Twilight sighed, ignoring the bound pegasus snickering behind her. “Yes, like my crazy doll. Look, it was Rainbow’s idea. Just remember it, okay?”

“Smartypants. Got it.”

“Good.” Twilight magically shook the rope out and twirled it over her head in a fair imitation of Applejack’s lasso-spinning. “Ready?”

Applejack nodded, swallowing. “Yes, ma’am.”

Twilight leaned closer and smiled impishly. “Don’t worry,” she said. “I’ll be gentle—though I can’t promise the same for that naughty pegasus back there,” she added loudly.

Applejack opened her mouth to respond, but she was suddenly silenced by Twilight’s lips, and Applejack promptly forgot whatever she’d been about to say. The unicorn pressed against her, kissing her hard. Applejack moaned softly and kissed back, relishing the wet warmth of Twilight’s tongue against her own. Heat flashed through her nethers again, and she instinctively reached out to wrap her forelegs around the other mare.

Twilight pulled back and gently swatted them aside. Applejack tried again, and again the unicorn pushed her back.

“Keep your hooves to yourself, Applejack,” said Twilight, licking the earth pony’s nose.

“But I want you, Twi,” growled Applejack, reaching out again.

Twilight smirked, and with a flare of magenta magic, started tying the rope around Applejack, once again forcing the earth pony’s forelegs to her sides.

Applejack had known it was coming, but she still felt a wave of cold, primal panic rush through her as the coarse fibers tightened around her body. She gulped a quick, gasping breath, every instinct telling her to scream smartypants, but she suddenly stopped as the panic gave way to an unexpected lightness. A quick wiggle confirmed that she still couldn’t move her legs, but that somehow made her feel . . . free. Relaxed. Now she didn’t have to think about her legs; she just had to think about Twilight.

Applejack smiled at Twilight and whispered, “I think I get it now.”

The unicorn smiled back, looking relieved. She tenderly kissed Applejack again and stroked her cheek with a hoof. The hoof slowly slid down the earth pony’s neck and over the rope binding her forelegs, lingering just above her slit for a long moment before finally plunging down.

Applejack groaned as Twilight stroked her folds. The unicorn was slow but relentless, her hoof gradually pressing harder and harder against Applejack’s slick mound.

“More,” gasped the earth pony. She began rocking her hips, trying to push herself against that tantalizing hoof.

“More?” purred Twilight.

“More!” Applejack rocked harder, desperate, but with her forelegs bound, she suddenly overbalanced and fell forward onto Twilight.

“Careful, Applejack,” said the unicorn, giggling. She laid the earth pony down on the floor, turned her over onto her back, placed a single, torturous kiss on her sopping slit—

—then trotted over to Rainbow Dash and began nuzzling the flushed, panting pegasus.

Applejack stared in horror.

“Twilight!” she shouted. “Please, Twi, don’t—don’t leave me like this! I need more!”

“Then come get it,” said Twilight, grinning wickedly over her shoulder as she waggled her rump.

Applejack howled and thrashed and tried not to listen to Rainbow gasping. After struggling for a minute, she managed to roll herself over onto her belly. Scrabbling madly, she got her rear legs up and awkwardly started pushing herself towards Twilight. A small part of her was vaguely embarrassed to be squirming face-first across the barn floor with her rump in the air, but the rest of her didn’t care. She needed that unicorn, and she’d crawl to her like a bug if she had to.

She wriggled as fast as she could and finally reached her goal. Breathing heavily, she looked up and saw Twilight preoccupied with her face buried in Rainbow’s dripping folds, Applejack’s hat half-off her head. The pegasus writhed noisily in her bonds.

Grinning, Applejack scooted forward and licked one of Twilight’s rear legs.

Twilight gave a loud eeep! and spun around. Her face was soaked with Rainbow’s juices.

“Twiiii!” wailed the pegasus.

“Please, Twi,” begged Applejack, doing her best to look piteous.

Twilight considered for a moment, then smiled and sat down on her haunches between Rainbow’s legs. Horn glowing, she gently picked up Applejack, turned her around, and brought the earth pony’s rump close to her face.

Applejack moaned in relief as she felt Twilight’s muzzle push aside her tail and press against her slit. The unicorn licked her delicately, then slipped her tongue inside. Applejack gasped as Twilight found her swollen, tender nib.

“Careful, AJ!” called Rainbow, chuckling weakly. “She’s a biter!”

Twilight pulled out just long enough to growl, “That, I’m saving for you,” then resumed her ministrations.

Applejack could feel the fire growing between her legs, a fire Twilight was energetically stoking with her darting tongue.

“You’re close, Applejack,” breathed the unicorn in between licks.

“I—I reckon I am,” the earth pony bit out.

“Remember, you can’t come—until I say so.”

“That’s—not fair.” Applejack squealed as Twilight suddenly nipped her folds. “I mean—yes, ma’am.”

“Very close, Applejack.”

“Yes, m-ma’am.”

Applejack’s tired rear legs began to tremble; she could feel the fire boiling within her.

“Twilight—”

“Not yet.”

“Twilight—”

“Almost, but not yet.”

Applejack squirmed, the tremors in her rear legs growing worse as the unicorn ravaged her slit. “Twi, please!”

Without warning, Twilight yanked her head back.

Applejack wailed. So close so close so close—

“All right,” said Twilight breathlessly. “Go ahead.”

Applejack felt the unicorn’s tongue brush her once more, and the fire exploded.

* * *

When she finally stopped shaking, she wriggled around to look at Twilight. The unicorn was sitting there watching her with an oddly nervous smile on her wet, pretty face while one hoof gently teased Rainbow’s folds.

Applejack smiled back, tired but satisfied. “That was somethin' else, sugar cube.”

Twilight giggled, and relief flooded her face. “I’m glad you enjoyed it, Applejack. I . . . well, I was a little worried about doing this with you,” she admitted.

“Well, I don’t know if it’s somethin’ I’d wanna do everyday, but I certainly have a better idea of why you and Dash enjoy this kinda stuff. Speakin’ of which . . . ” She looked up at the pegasus, who at this point was looking more than a little desperate.

Twilight followed her gaze, then arched an eyebrow at Applejack.

The earth pony nodded. “I’m game for another round.” She grinned. “Ma’am.”

You're Really Good at This

YOU’RE REALLY GOOD AT THIS

“You’re really good at this, Twi,” I say in between gasps. I’ve never had my wings tied down like this, and it’s amazing. They’re twitching and jerking so much that they almost hurt, but they don’t, not quite. The almost is the important part. Twilight knows what she’s doing. She’s giving me all the pleasure and just a hint of pain, and I’m already dripping all over her bed.

Twi blushes and smiles, but she doesn’t stop. “Leg, please,” she says. I obediently hold out a foreleg, and she uses her magic to slip another rope around it. I watch the rope move. It slides over and under and through and around again, forming this crazy complicated knot, and I can feel it getting tighter and tighter.

It’s kinda weird, watching yourself get tied up. The ropes just keep going around and getting tighter, and every knot takes away more of your freedom, and you’re just sitting there letting it happen. There’s this little part of your brain shouting at you to shove the ropes off and fly away, but the rest of you is just getting more and more turned on. That’s what it’s all about, though—you don’t really wanna move. You want be helpless, because you know the hot unicorn tying you up is gonna do incredible things to you. You want her to be completely in charge, because she’s amazing, and you know you can trust her to push you just hard enough.

I look up at her. She’s totally focused on the rope, biting her lip as she concentrates. Her eyes . . . her eyes are beautiful. I could drown in them. I know it sounds cheesy and uncool, but I really could. They’re deep and wonderful and they get this shine in them when she’s excited, and it just makes me wanna hug her.

I can’t right now, though, because she’s gently tugging my leg behind my back and tying it to the rope harness already binding my wings. I settle for leaning over and kissing her. She giggles and kisses back, and we forget everything else for a minute. She’s hungry, pushing her tongue deep into my mouth and feeling every corner of it. I push back, tasting her, and we moan into each other. My wings yank uselessly at the ropes.

“You’re really good at this,” I say again as we separate. She’s flushed and sweaty and super sexy, and she has drool running down her chin. I know some of it’s mine.

She just grins and says, “Leg, please.” I grin back and give her my other foreleg. She ties a knot around it like the first one, then pulls it behind my back and ties it in place. I wiggle, trying to move my wings and forelegs, but I know I won’t be able to, and it’s insanely exciting. My body finally starts to figure it out: I’m hers now. She can do anything she wants to me. She can drive me wild with pleasure me or break me with pain—or both—and there’s nothing I can do to stop her. I’m completely in her hooves. I’m hers. Until she lets me go, I belong to Twilight Sparkle, the best marefriend in the world.

I look at her, panting. Her eyes are bright, and I know mine are, too.

“Lie down,” she whispers, stroking my cheek.

I flop face-first onto the bed. The ropes dig into me, reminding me of just how helpless I am now. The bed bounces a little as she shuffles around, and then suddenly she’s sitting on my back, straddling me, with my head under her pretty purple tail while she faces my rump. She’s not a big mare, but I still groan at the extra weight, and at the way the ropes tug at my pulled-back forelegs. She’s really wet, too—I can feel it dripping from her slit and down her thighs and into my mane.

“Are you all right, Dashie?” she asks. “Want me to get off?” She sounds a little nervous, and her legs tense around me.

“I’m fine,” I say before she can kill the mood, “but I was kinda hoping we’d both get off, ya know?”

She laughs, and her legs relax again. She leans forward across my back, pressing her sticky slit and warm belly against me, and then I feel her kissing my rump and flanks. She moves from one cutie mark to the other, kissing and licking and biting the whole way, with her forehooves rubbing my sides. Suddenly she returns to my tail and starts nibbling on my dock, right where it sticks out of my rump.

I yell something into the blanket and instinctively try to flick my tail, but she holds on with her teeth. My slit and my tail hole and my whole rump are practically buzzing. My forelegs and wings are tied down, I have a horny unicorn (ha!) sitting on top of me, and she’s got my tail in her mouth—sweet Celestia, she’s licking it now, too—so the only thing I can do is thrash my back legs.

“Uh-oh,” she says. “We can’t have that.”

She shifts a bit, and then I feel more rope twisting around one of my hinds. Once she’s satisfied with the knots, she pulls the leg up against my side and ties it to the harness, just like she did with my forelegs. She does the same thing with my last leg, and I struggle a little, testing the knots, but they’re tight. I’m even more helpless than I was before.

It’s perfect. I know it sounds weird, but it really is. It’s hard to explain, but the only other time I feel this free is when I’m soaring through the clouds. When I’m up there, it’s like it’s only me and the sky, and nothing else matters. When I’m down here, tied up on Twi’s bed and completely at her mercy, it’s only me and her—me and the mare I love. Twilight is the world right now. There’s nothing else I need to think about.

I wriggle in my ropes and let out a happy sigh.

“Do you like that?” she asks, ruffling my mane.

“Mmmmm,” I say. Her thighs are still dripping.

“And what about . . . this?”

My tail suddenly tingles as she lifts it up with her magic. She gives it a gentle tug, and I whimper. She does it again, just a little harder, and then I feel another rope wrap around my dock. I squirm as she runs the other end through the harness—I’m pretty sure I know what’s next. Sure enough, she starts pulling on the rope, pulling my tail with it. She keeps going, and I moan as my tail hole and my slit get stretched. It hurts, but it still feels so good. Everything is being pulled and exposed and it’s making me hot, and by the time she finally ties off the rope, I’m stretched tight and panting and gasping and shaking.

“You’re . . . you’re really, really good at this,” I manage to say.

She giggles. “You keep saying that,” she says.

“Because it’s truuuuuuuuoh sweet Celestia!” I squeal as she slowly brushes a hoof over my holes. They’re both twitching like crazy. “You’re—oh wow wow wow—you’re amazing, Twi. Nopony else could make me feel this good.” I chuckle into the blanket. “It’s like you should have a cutie mark in this.”

The goofy egghead actually tries to hug me. She mostly just ends up sticking her face in my tied-up tail and squeezing my rump between her forelegs, but it’s still a real hug—I can feel the love in it, and it makes me smile. Twi’s adorkable like that. She can tell you she loves you by hugging your rump.

“What would that even look like?” she says into my tail. Her breath is warm and tickly, and then her tongue, yesyesyes, her tongue, warm and wet and sliding all over . . .

“I—I dunno,” I say. “Maybe it’d be me or something.”

“A cutie mark of Rainbow Dash?”

“Why . . . why not?” I wheeze. She’s doing things to my folds and my tail hole, and it’s getting hard to think straight. “Who wouldn’t want me . . . mmmmmm . . . want me on their flanks?”

“But Dash, I thought you liked my cutie mark,” she says in between nips at my rump.

“I do!” I shout. “I love your cutie mark!” I know she’s just teasing, but I think sometimes she really does worry about not being pretty, which of course is completely stupid. Twilight Sparkle is beautiful. I make sure to tell her that a lot.

“Good,” she says, and I can hear the naughty grin in her voice. “But I think I want you on my flanks after all.”

She gives my tail hole one last lick, then lifts herself up and starts shuffling backward over my head. She goes slowly, giving me plenty of time to lift my muzzle and stuff my face between her legs. She’s completely soaked now. I nuzzle her and lick her everywhere I can reach, slurping up everything. She gasps, and I can feel her shiver as she passes.

She sits down on her haunches in front of me, spreading her legs wide. She leans back for a minute, grinning and watching me as I pant and stare at the juices trickling out of her cute little slit. Slowly, she closes her legs again and turns to the side so that one of her sexy flanks is almost in my face. I could lean forward and lick it—which is probably the idea.

“Go on, Dashie,” she says. She pats the pink star on her flank and gives me a warm, happy smile. “Show me how much you love my cutie mark.”

So I smile back and do what she says.

She really does taste . . . magical.

Author's Note

In case anyone's wondering: yes, I am working on that Rarity chapter I promised. It's about halfway done at the moment. Like I said before, I'm sloooow.

...except when I have a stomach ache, apparently. See, this chapter was completely and utterly unplanned. I had a terrible stomach ache the other day, and somehow I came up with a chapter idea (doubling as a response to an SMP prompt) AND smashed out 95% of it in half an hour. Compared to my usual pace, that's slightly beyond the speed of light. Maybe I should have indigestion more often.