“Pinkie!” Mrs. Cake screamed.

“Sorry, Mrs. Cake. I didn’t think you’d be home today. I was just looking for my…” Pinkie Pie noticed the magazine that Mrs. Cake didn’t have a chance to hide. “There it is. Why didn’t you just ask if you wanted to borrow it?”

Pinkie Pie stood in the doorway of Mr. and Mrs. Cake’s room. The older mare was lying on her back with her hind legs spread and a suspicious looking magazine opened flat over her chest. Mrs. Cake blushed and couldn’t find the words to explain herself. Pinkie Pie hopped over to her side and peaked at the page Mrs. Cake was looking at. Mrs. Cake didn’t even bother to pull it away as Pinkie lifted the magazine up with her hoof. It of course was none other than “Hung Hunks,” and it was opened to a page with one of the more tame images: two stallions sitting on the edge of a bed with their legs spread, and they were holding their royal guard helmets over their private parts.

“You can hold onto it for a while,” said Pinkie Pie. “And don’t worry. I won’t tell anypony. I know most ponies like to keep this kind of thing a secret.” She did an exaggerated zipper motion over her lips.

“Actually,” said Mrs. Cake, in a hopelessly nervous voice. “I think I’m done with it. It’s uh, much more…graphic than I was expecting. Please just take it. Please. Take it…now. Please.”

“But that’s the best part!” Pinkie accidentally flung the magazine up into the air with her enthusiasm.

“Well I don’t know about that…” The magazine landed back onto Mrs. Cake’s chest, and she casually tried to push it away.

“Did you see the page with the stallions piled on top of each other?”

“No. I…must have missed that one.”

“Here. I’ll show you—.” Pinkie Pie took the magazine in her mouth and yanked it away from Mrs. Cake.

“Pinkie...I don’t know if I feel comfortable with this.”

“Sorry. You’re right. I should leave you alone.” Pinkie carefully placed the magazine beside Mrs. Cake on her bed.

“It’s just…I don’t want you thinking of me like this,” said Mrs. Cake as she finally closed her legs back together.

“Like what?”

“You know…the kind of mare that does this sort of thing behind her husband’s back.”

“Oh. I wouldn’t worry about that. I found Mr. Cake with one of my magazines a few weeks ago.”

“You what?” The married mare sprung up with a sudden intensity that was quite unlike her.

“Oops. That was supposed to be a secret. At least I assume Mr. Cake would want that to be a secret.”

“You caught him…you saw him…” Mrs. Cake trembled.

“No, no, no. I didn’t see anything like that. I just noticed one of my magazines was missing one day, like today, and I saw Mr. Cake bringing it back to my room. He didn’t see me though, and he didn’t know I saw him.”

“Show me the magazine.”

Pinkie Pie took Mrs. Cake to her room and pulled the magazine in question from her massive stack. She found it on her first try. It was an issue of “The Mare,” featuring Spitfire on the cover in a provocative pose. Mrs. Cake frantically flipped through every page as if she hoped to find a specific mare that had betrayed her.

“What’s wrong, Mrs. Cake?” asked Pinkie as her eyes darted back and forth along with each page turn.

Mrs. Cake noticed Pinkie hovering over her shoulder and put the magazine down in defeat. “I just can’t believe this…”

“Why? Seems to me that the two of you have the same hobby. Isn’t that great?”

“Not when it’s like this.”

Pinkie Pie put her hoof to her chin with a puzzled look on her face.

“It’s just,” continued Mrs. Cake, “when I have my private time…” She put down the magazine as the words stuck in her throat.

“You can tell me,” said Pinkie, taking her front leg and wrapping it around Mrs. Cake.

“I don’t know… It feels strange knowing that he does the same thing. It makes me worry that he doesn’t see me in that way anymore.”

“In what way?”

“You know…like a mare worth wanting.”

“Oh that’s silly,” said Pinkie, giving Mrs. Cake a sudden pat on the flank.

“Pinkie! Personal space! Please…”

“Sorry.” Pinkie Pie shuffled a few inches away. “But don’t you think Mr. Cake might feel the same way if he knew you were a fan of Hung Hunks.”

“Well…I guess you have a point. But I love my hubby. He knows that.”

“So you should know that he loves you too. Right?”

“I know... You must think I’m just a sad old mare.”

“Of course not. What you need is something to spice up your love life. Or at least that’s how my magazines put it.”

“Spice…?”

“Yeah! Something to remind each other that you’re both still hot stuff.”

Mrs. Cake blushed and watched as Pinkie Pie dove head first into her special private toy chest.

“I’ve got all kinds of stuff in here. There’s got to be something to help you.”

Mrs. Cake waited patiently for Pinkie’s sudden burst of energy to yield some results. The issue of “The Mare” that her husband had been ogling caught Mrs. Cake’s eye again. She was reminded of the young mare showing herself off on the cover. Pinkie Pie said something unintelligible in her high pitched voice, jolting Mrs. Cake back to the task at hand. She turned around and saw it: the round pink shape of Pinkie Pie’s flank swaying from side to side. Mrs. Cake slowly turned her head and looked back down at the magazine’s cover and then back to Pinkie Pie.

“Pinkie dear…” Her voice was bursting with hesitation.

“Yeah?” Pinkie still had her head in the toy chest.

“I think I know how you can help…”

Author's Note

I'm still not sure where I'm going to go with the main storyline, so I decided to write this little side story for fun.