My Little Twisted Sweet Tooth

Returning to this colorful world took some adjusting. I forgot what it felt like to be a flying horse – zebra. The body was just as I remembered it and didn’t seem to change with time spent away. My wings even retained their metal tips. How much time went by I wondered. My body felt the same but the world seemed a bit different. It was much calmer. I looked around taking in the sickeningly calm surrounding area: A few ponies passed by me giggling in joyous laughter, the birds sung harmonious songs, and the sparse white fluffy clouds high above offered a sense of tranquility. Boys and Girls, I'm in hell!

It took a few moments of experiencing shock for me to remember my rightfully-given new powers. I was so excited to try out those powers in this world! Alas, Boys and Girls, I tried everything to use those powers but ended up stamping a hoof down in absolute frustration. Nothing happened; the powers were gone. Why? Did this world only exhibit its own energies barring and disregarding outside ones? Fuck! Calypso, I can hear you laughing in your grave! I didn’t realize coming here would mean being stranded. Anyways, I knew what I needed to do so I set off to find my Queen. She would set things right remembering that my Queen always knew what was best. I could rely on her as she could on me. Both our worlds rejected us and I knew finding her would be like reuniting with a dependable best friend.

I couldn’t find her.

My Queen, she was nowhere to be found though my search proximity was rather limited. I decided to wait until night as either spotting her in the sky or in my dreams would provide better results. The night came around sooner than I thought it would. I had spent all day searching for my Queen letting time pass by quickly. Seeing the moon rise above the horizon, I scanned the skies for any indication of her presence. Most of the night was spent in this activity of night-sky observation. Finally, after plenty of time waiting, I saw a purplish pony fly across the sky. It was her! At first, excitement rose in me but…something seemed off. If it truly was her, she looked different with a somewhat unfamiliar aura. Not only that but she flew to Canterlot? Was she truly a queen now? That is where I headed curious as to what changes occurred in my absence.

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The sun had risen by the time I reached Canterlot. I wasn’t sure what to expect…or even how I should approach that city. Certainly the ponies there would take offense to my return considering the atrocities I committed. Unless, of course, the freaks realize they should be honored to have their throats cut by my ~~hand~~ hoove. Boys and Girls, why does simply returning back to this colorful world transfigure my body into such a ridiculous form?

A couple more questions on entering the city of Canterlot came to mind. Should I hide my identity? Does subtlety matter? I feel like a lot of time has passed. You know what, Boys and Girls? Fuck this shit! My fine art should not have a need for such secrecy. As I approached the city's gates, I walked by some guards at the entrance who didn’t flinch or recognize me. They merely said I should enjoy my day.

Oh, I will! ...I will! There's enough sweetness to go around for everyone! Even all of you, Boys and Girls! Every. Single. One. Of. You.

I was in the clear. A sizable number of ponies appeared to be gathering in the city center so that is where I went next. There I saw my Queen standing on the palace’s balcony observing the gathering crowd. Her appearance had changed quite a bit. It had returned to the point in time when I first came to this world nearly landing into the side of their moon. I continued watching her elegant movements wanting to speak with her badly. I wanted to be with the only one I could ever call a friend. Continuing to watch, my Queen turned to her left as she made room on the balcony for Celestia…what is this bullshit!?

I didn’t pay any attention to Celestia’s speech. I was absolutely pissed, infuriated, confused, upset, and at a loss for words. Obviously something important happened after I left this world! Something I should have been here to prevent! There was one moment in Celestia's speech when she seemingly caught a glimpse of me among the crowd. Immediately I backed away further into the crowd and saw her eyes shift quickly as if searching for what was momentarily seen. This was not the time or place for anything so I made my way out of the crowd. Just as I was at the the city center's exit, I peered one last time in the balcony’s direction to eye my changed Queen. She took on a look of shock as Celestia whispered something into her ear. For the first time in my life, Boys and Girls, I felt a slight pang in my heart. It was like what I held most dear was taken away much like how many fathers felt in finding what remained of their children.

Aimless walking was my only resolve at this point. I could try and reach my Queen again. However, should I? How much of this world - my Queen - has changed since I left? Walking around Canterlot, I stumbled across a labyrinth and what looked like a sculpture garden. It was here I heard a voice calling to me in a mocking tone.

Well now, this is certainly a treat. Never would have guessed you would return and here of all places…(laughter)…Are you lost? Did you lose something? No. Must be someone, it said as though from inside my head.

Already frustrated I snapped back, “Whoever you are I don’t like your tone! Let your presence be known!” I was not in the mood for games of hide and seek.

It spoke after a moment of silence, My dear confused little colt, you’re standing right before me.

Looking up, I saw a statue of what seemed to be a goat, serpent…something. Its grotesque features made me want to puke. A sudden urge rose up to break the damn thing. Before I could act on these urges, it continued in its own rambling.

Yet another one comes around that doesn’t know who I am. Such a shame Celestia. What are you teaching the ponies these days? I am Discord, lord of all that is chaos and disharmony. You are Twisted Sweet Tooth, confused and lost because your princess is not how you remember her. A lot has changed. How sad. Thing is she is not herself. The elements of harmony saw to that and me as well. Hmm, say, seeing as to your reputation in the past, would you kindly do something for me? I guarantee you will find what you seek after all is said and done.

“How about no and I break some pieces off that statue body? Maybe I should kick that head around in a game of hockey?”

First, no. Violence will get you nowhere as you will still be stranded in this world. Second, stop the rhyming. You are only half zebra. Three, why not listen to what I offer before flying off the handle?

“Fine. I’ll listen. Make it quick before I change my mind.”

There’s a good pony! Now…you remember those six pieces of jewelry used against you long ago? Well, Celestia hasn’t been able to use them these days giving the task to six ponies living in a town called Ponyville each representing the elements of harmony: Generosity, Honesty, Kindness, Laughter, Loyalty, and Magic. What I would like you to do is kill these six ponies. Should be simple for you if the legends and stories still hold true.

“Just kill them?”

Yes, just kill them. Do I have to spell it out? K I L-

“-Sounds like your problem. I think you’re lying to get out of your cage.”

Believe what you want, but you will be forced to stay here forever unless you do it. Besides, it’s your problem too. Breaking up the elements of harmony would release Nightmare Moon, otherwise it will not happen. Doesn't the lonely little zebra want his best friend back to cuddle up next to on starry nights telling stories of past experiences, future goals, and wishful aspirations?

My anger was reaching its peak. If I didn't get a real answer soon, this statue was going to find out how easy it is to grind stone into dust.

“Break up the elements of harmony by killing the holders of them? How so? There is more to it than that! I'm a clown but not a fool! I'll let you know I search the insides of those who hide things from me. And there is something you're definitely not telling me.”

Not really. As cruel and vicious as you are, you will fulfill the second requirement.

“What second requirement?”

The unbreakable friendship bond this is all it has ever been. Much like magnetic attraction, do not make the same mistake again.

”Make sense!”

“Make sense? Oh, what fun is there in making sense? Off with you now. I grow tired of your presence.”

In sudden silence, I couldn't decide whether to go kill the elements of harmony holders or smash this statue into small pieces. Truthfully, it was the first real lead I had. I decided to kill the holders and come back for the statue if it was lying. The most important thing right now was to get my Queen back.

Elements of harmony? So that is what Celestia used against me instead of facing me head on like a cowardly bitch. Make no mistake Boys and Girls they were powerful and I needed to take caution if I were to go through with what that statue was suggesting. My thoughts were consumed with the longing to be reunited with my Queen. She was the only one I felt a connection. The loneliness felt right now needed to change. There was no doubt in my mind. I had to save her from her own ‘Marcus’ no matter the cost or risk. I made my choice. I decided to kill the six ponies. After getting directions from a Canterlot citizen, I headed to Ponyville.