My name is Pinkie Pie, and I'm in love with an alligator.
And let's be frank: Who isn't? Who doesn't just adore Gummy!
That sweet little alligator has been part of my life for a year now, and I don't regret a single day. He's the one up first in the morning to make fresh coffee; who is there late at night if you are in need of comfort. He is the one who massages your shoulders after an especially taxing day. Just what you'd call an all-around sweetheart.
Ever since I adopted Gummy as my pet, things just haven't been the same here at Sugarcube Corner. His special, joyful aura is an incredible enrichment to my everyday life. He knows just the word to say to make you laugh after a gloomy day! And even the few times when he's silent, he just has that special affectionate gaze. A gaze that seems tailor-made just for you. With him, you feel loved. Those who love you, you should love back -- isn't that what they say?
Yes, I love Gummy with all of my diabetes-ridden pink heart! He's the Jekyll to my Hyde, the frosting to my pie, the petal to my rose. He is the dawn to my night, the sugar in my coffee, the antiperspirant to my armpits. He is the apple of my eye, the taste buds on my tongue, the anvil inside of my ear. It's true! Which colt could ever love you the way Gummy could?
But there is one thing I failed to see. Something that lay hidden behind the thin veneer of the intelligent, friendly and outgoing alligator. Underneath all of that flippant kindness, there was a deep and brooding secret. In the following lines, I, Pinkie Pie, will shed light on the recent mysterious events that have unearthed that secret. They have made me see charming Gummy in an entirely different light. Not that he has become any less desirable to me -- on the contrary.
It all started two weeks ago. When I came home that faithful day, after an exhausting day standing next to Applejack while she was working, things were different. I noticed that the moment I entered Sugarcube Corner: sweet Gummy stood there waiting for me alright, but there was something different about his behavior, about his gestures, his expressions. He seemed strangely detached. Usually, his face would light up and he would recite to me a particularly sweet love poem he had just composed. He was such an artist, my Gummy! But that day, something seemed off. He looked distant, as though he wasn't really there. I decided to employ my awesome Pinkie likability powers to get him back on track.
"Hey cupcake," I said, lifting him to give him a kiss. "How's your day been?"
Silence.
"Fine," he said after a while. His voice was strangely hollow. "How has your day been."
I was surprised by the flatness of his tone. "It's been exhausting, sweetie. I've been helping Applejack at the farm all day. And you?"
"I see, honey. I have been standing in a corner all day and stared indifferently into the distance."
That was definitely unusual behaviour. I was getting worried. What could be the matter with him? A depression? Or maybe I just didn't spend enough time with him? That would be it, it bolted through my head -- he was feeling left alone by me!
"Oh Sweetie, I'm so sorry," I whispered. "I'll stay home more often."
"I see, honey. That is good."
"Yeah..."
"The others must not know."
"Must not know what, honey?"
Silence.
"You mean they must not know that we have a secret relationship?"
"Yes."
"Because you're my pet? Cause you're an alligator, and I'm a pony?"
"Yes."
"Or because of something else?"
"Yes."
I gave him an exasperated look. My little Gummy could be tricky like that! But that made him all the more endearing. I gave him a snuggle-wuggle on the snout and cuddled up to my Gummy-wummy-lummy.
"Here comes blowing on the Gummy-tummy!" I proclaimed and blew a raspberry on his belly. He giggled. "Seems like somealligator's ticklish!" I teased and blew once again. "Heh heh," came the reply. But I could feel that something was different; his heart wasn't really in it. Disappointed, I dropped him back to the ground.
"Gummy, dear, whatever it is that makes you gloomy-doomy today, you know you can talk about it with me, right?"
"Yes."
"Yes? Would you like to talk about it?"
"Yes."
"... well, go on."
Silence. Gummy stared off into the distance. "What's the matter with you today, cupcake," I sighed, exasperated. "I just don't understand... are you hungry? Is that it? D'you want mammy to bake you a cookie?" I smiled warmly.
"NO!" he screamed and ran off.
"Gummy! Come back this instant!"
"NO! NO! NO!"
"What is it with you today! Come back!"
"I don't like your cookies."
"You don't -- but -- now, now, Gummy. You're just saying that because you're upset, aren't you?"
I had finally managed to grab him by the tail and set him on the kitchen counter. Bravely ignoring his hurtful comments, I gave him an understanding smile. He nodded slowly, his eyes the size of saucers. (His pupils, though, were the size of beads.)
"Why are you upset, Gummy? It's okay, you can tell me."
Wasn't there a trace of guilt in his gaze? A telltale sign of a bad conscience? I decided to take the bull by the horns and ask him outright.
"Gummy," I said. "What are you hiding from me? Just tell me already! Whatever it is, you'll feel better after just telling me! We don't have secrets in this house, do we?"
Gummy was a sensitive one; there was no denying it. Barely had I finished my sentence did tears start to fill up his large, expressive eyes. "No," I stammered. "Oh Gummy, don't cry -- I didn't mean to -- to be mean --"
I reached for his beautiful neck and started petting it in long, drawn-out strokes. His sleek scales felt fantastic against my fur; the grooves in between his scales provided for an almost orgasmic texture. He started to purr. As I leaned in to share a long, deep-tongued kiss with him, I could finally feel that familiar spark of passion in him again. I leaned closer and intensified the kiss, exploring his mouth with my skilled, sweet-tasting tongue. His own taste was reptilian and slightly mineral in nature, but I loved it: it was the salt to my sugar.
For a few moments, we continued like this, eventually rolling around on the ground. But soon, I realised that his passion had died out as quickly as it had kindled. "Oh come on," I said, almost desperately. "Please tell me what's happened, honey! I promise i won't be mad or anything. Just tell me, okay? You can tell me anything, baby!"
There was a pause. I felt his breath on my face, and was very aware of his lucid, violet eyes that were no doubt searching my feelings. Even now, his peculiar gaze gave me the distinct impression of being x-rayed — and I still loved it. Finally, he spoke, his voice hesitant.
"I cheated on you."
At first, I believed I had misheard. "What?" I said, a sheepish grin on my face.
"I cheated on you."
"Okay, it's not funny, cupcake... cut it out..."
"Not a joke," said Gummy, and met my disbelieving gaze with a sheepish display of indifference. "I am sorry, Pinkamena."
I gave an incredulous, fake laugh. The hollow warmth of personal disappointment spread through me. Gummy! Out of all ponies and alligators, him! I couldn't believe it.
"How -- how could you," I stammered after a while. "I have feelings, you know. You know what feelings are, right?"
"Of course," Gummy asserted with utmost conviction.
My eyes were swimming in tears by this point. "Just tell me... just tell me... with whom..."
"With your friend, Pinkamena."
"Don't -- oh don't call me that -- just say honey or cupcake or dear or whatever -- but not -- Pinkamena," I said, my face full with barely contained tears. I laid a hoof on his forehead; I needed emotional comfort, and he was the only one around right now to provide it. I tried to bring my tears under control and smile bravely, but that was difficult.
"Which friend, sweetie? It's okay, you can t-tell me," I sobbed with a feeble smile.
"The bunny."
I stumbled back.
The bunny?
TO BE CONTINUED
Nudge nudge wink wink
IMPORTANT DISCLAIMER: This story contains or will contain explicit alligator-on-pony, alligator-on-bunny, alligator-on-cat, alligator-on-Pinkie plus solo alligator scenes. If you are offended by any of that, absolutely do not read, you prude!
