The Broken Bird

by Fedoraman

Rating: mature
Tags: Fluttershy, Sex, Tragedy, Big Macintosh, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Main 6, Romance, Original Character, Comedy
Length: 73465

Salad Shooter follows her brother's example and settles down. Then the natives start getting restless. VERY restless.

(Direct sequel to The Oldest Crusader. Read that first or you will have no idea what's going on.)

Salad Shooter accomplished her life's goal of finding and making peace with her estranged brother. Now a part of his life again, she has no more reason to travel, and settles into Ponyville to ensure he remains a part of hers.

...Now if only the rest of the town would just accept the fact that she didn't want anything to do with them, things would be pretty much perfect. Too bad for her that Ponyville is crazy.

A story of melting through a cold exterior, discovering the meaning of 'home', and trying not to murder one's parents in the most gruesome ways that come to a fairly imaginative mind.

Image by the talented Castalyne

(Set before season 3. Also pretend the Tragedy tag up there is Sad. For some reason, I can't pick both that and Comedy, so I had to make due with Tragedy. kthx.)

Published 2013-04-22 22:50:02 UTC
Last updated 2013-05-09 12:30:51 UTC

Things Escalate Quickly

Chapter Two: Things Escalate Quickly
or
The Absolute Scariest Thing In Equestria

Desperate times called for desperate measures.

Mother was scared to the point where she wouldn’t leave the cottage. This was depressingly normal, but every other time she at least had the presence of mind to make sure the pantry was stocked before she gave up the outside.

He was halfway through the last carrot. He only had one shot at saving mother and the others from starvation.

And when he did, they would look to him and know.

Angel owned them.

The bunny leapt out through an open window, scanned the sky, wound up his little arm, and let fly their salvation.

A passing Rainbow Dash took the vegetable in the side of her head and fell spinning into the ground.

“What the horsefeathering- a carrot?! Angel! If that was you I’m gonna stuff you for Pony Easter you-“

She trailed off when she saw the little white bunny glaring at her and pointing a paw toward the cottage.

“…Flutters needs help?”

Angel nodded.

“Then I’ll let this go. Next time just wave the flag I gave you.”

The way the bunny looked at her plainly said ‘this way is better’.

Rainbow ignored him and took off again, making for Fluttershy’s open window.

Angel sighed to himself. Mother was lucky he loved her. She wouldn’t have survived this long otherwise.

--

“Hey, Fluttershy, open up. Angel threw a carrot at me, now tell me what’s wrong.”

“Oh, hello Rainbow.” The yellow pegasus greeted as she opened the window as if nothing was out of the ordinary at all. “I’m terribly sorry, I’ll have to have a talk wi-“

“Alright, so, how does it go?” The athlete cleared her throat. “Ahem. You've reached Equestria First Response Rescue, what is the nature of your emergency?”

“I, um… don’t know what you mean?”

“Fluttershy, every time Angel’s shot me down, it’s because you need help but can’t leave to go get it.” Rainbow flew in through the open window and relaxed herself in Fluttershy’s bed. “So, how can your favourite flying friend improve your life?”

Fluttershy shook her head. “Nothing’s wrong. I, um… just didn’t feel like leaving the cottage.”

Dash raised an eyebrow, and looked behind her friend. Angel had found his way back into the house and was giving the back of Fluttershy’s head the evil eye.

“You’re lying to me.”

“I’m… I’m not.”

“What, did something in the forest spook you? Do you have another stalker? Did somepony threaten you? Di-… what.” Dash received her answer when Fluttershy flinched at the mention of threats.

“…It’s… really not as bad as it sou-“

“Who threatened you?” Angel was now perked up and paying attention. And possibly regretting using his last carrot. Part of Dash smiled. Sometimes the ball of fluff had the right idea.

“Really, it was my fault and sh-“

“She? It was a mare? None of the mares in town have a problem with you so I…”

“Rainbow, really, it’s-“

“Hey, was it that sister of Ivan’s?” Dash asked calmly as she rolled off the bed. “She’s the only one I can think of who’d possibly threaten you.”

“Rainbow, calm down-“

“Just say the word Fluttershy.”

“It was my fault, I was the one who bumped her so-“ And just like that, Rainbow Dash had rocketed out of the room with enough force to tilt the pictures on her wall and blow about the papers on her desk.

This was bad.

“Oh dear.”

--

Salad, finding herself with another empty day off, was on her way to Sweet Apple Acres. It was becoming a habit of hers to go there to hang out.

She was beginning to suspect that she was the only one who ever visited Big Mac.

She also wondered why that orange sister of his hadn’t walked over to say hello. Granted, she truly didn’t care whether she did or not, but everypony on the farm seemed to be happy pleasant folks, and those normally said hello when one came to call.

Applebloom did from time to time, usually to ask about Ivan. Whatever.

She was just thinking about how odd it was for an apple pony to be coloured like an orange when something ploughed her in the side, sending her sprawling in into a nearby tree.

Oh yeah. Somepony was begging for spiked shoes. Lucky them, she had just enough for everypony.

“Oh, you again.” Salad said as she recognised Rainbow. “Last I checked, ‘buck off’ means ‘buck off’.”

“Last I checked, we’re on eastern pain time, and it’s Dash ‘o clock.”

“…I’m going to start hurting you now.” Salad said. “I’m pretty sure I’m not going to stop.”

Dash responded by moving at her trademark speed and nailing her again towards another tree.

She didn’t however expect Salad to land on it and spring back just as fast.

She also didn’t expect spiked shoes to hurt so much.

Addled by the strike to the head, she tumbled painfully to the ground, and looked up to blearily see something pink coming at her fast.

Is she flying with one wing?

She barely managed to move her head out of the path of a pink hindhoof, and flipped herself back upright.

Then she took another hit to the face when Salad moved again.

Dash landed painfully, baring her teeth as blood dripped into her eye.

“You know, I’m glad you’re here. Popping out of nowhere and attacking me without a reason. You’re the most convenient stress relief I’ve ever had. It’s great, really.”

Dash’s problem wasn’t Salad’s speed, nopony could out-speed her. The problem was that Salad was moving unpredictably. A flap of her wing had her rocketing wherever she wanted.

…she wasn’t flying. She was taking off. Dash had never considered taking off in any other direction then up. The way Salad was doing it, she could zip around and, with the aid of her cleats, turn on a dime.

Salad also appeared to have no problem hitting ponies when they were down, as Dash heard the telltale woosh of a pegasus using the wind.

A flap of her own wings had her in the air and out of the danger zone, but she heard the woosh again and sure enough, Salad was flying up right at her a split second later.

Dash just barely managed to move out of the way, but this time there was nothing for Salad to bank off of for a second attack.

Dash wrapped her forelegs around the pink pegasus’ barrel and whipped herself back so they were both upside-down in the air.

Aerial suplex, Dash thought with a grin. Buck yes.

The ground seemed to shake as Dash evened the score.

--

Big Mac paused as he was about to buck a tree.

Whatever that was, it was loud, and close. And it’s gettin’ the hay off mah property.

--

Salad landed a vicious hook to Dash’s face, only to take a pair of hindhooves to the face when the athlete whipped around.

And to make matters worse, Dash was starting to take off across the ground too.

Oh bucking moon, did I teach her how to do that?

Dash, bloodied and bruised, took to the sky and watched her warily.

She’s luring me for another grab. I think I’ll teach her something new.

Salad took off twice, once forward, and again to sharply angle herself into the air.

Dash dodged her, and made to get ready to grab her.

Salad twisted around, spread her wing as far as it could go, and gathered as much wind as she could.

Most pegasi never learn how to take off in mid air. They can just fly.

The look of shock on Dash’s previously smug face was priceless.

I’m not like most pegasi though.

Salad hit her like a speeding arrow, forehooves first, and sent the both of them digging a long trail in the ground.

She grit her teeth and raised a hoof to hopefully take a few teeth out for good measure.

“That’s enough outta both of ya.” Salad paused, blinked, and noticed that Dash had done the same. By the look of it, Dash was about to clock her too.

At the same time it looks like. Probably would’ve looked funny.

“Hi Red.” Salad coughed, clamouring off of Dash, and leveling a casual hoof at the other pegasus. “She started it.”

“Don’t care. It ain’t happenin’ on mah land.”

“She has it coming Big Mac!” Dash yelled. “Go get Applejack and we’ll make sure this jerk never even looks to Fluttershy again!”

“Wait.” Salad said. “Who?”

“Fluttershy! The one you threatened!”

“…you’re going to have to be more specific.” Salad said, rolling her eyes. “Was it Tuesday? It was probably Tuesday. I threatened a lot of ponies that day.”

“Pegasus mare. Yellow. Pink mane.” Big Mac supplied, eyebrow raised.

“Oh, her.” Said Salad. “She bumped me and stared at my wing for a while. Then she was about to ask me about it so I told her to shut it up and move it along. What, did she think that translated to ‘I’m going to cut you up and bake you into cupcakes’?”

“You’re lying.” Rainbow said. “She’s been shut up in her cottage for I don’t even know how long.”

“Since Tuesday.” Salad said. “And how is that my fault?”

“Because you threatened her!”

“Then she’s the liar.” Big Mac saw Rainbow tense up and probably almost start round two.

“Go talk to her.” He said before the cyan mare pounced. “I’ll deal with Salad.”

“What the buck did you just say?” Salad growled at him. “Deal with me?”

“Somepony has to.” Big Mac said. “Can’t have ya all covered in blood and dirt when we get this all sorted.”

Her indignation faded, ever so slightly. At the least, she was quiet now.

“This isn’t over.” Rainbow said. Something about Big Mac told her that trying to start the fight up again was a bad idea. Instead she took to the air, deciding to drag Fluttershy over and get the truth.

Maybe then Mac wouldn’t step in the way again.

--

Big Mac helped Salad remove her shoes and herded her into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him and fishing a washcloth out of a cupboard.

“Do you think I was lying?” Salad asked, surprisingly co-operating with him as he sat her down and started wiping her cuts clean.

“Ah think somepony’s mistaken. Ah don’t think either of ya’d lie about somethin’ like this.”

“…She looked worse then I did, right?”

“Maybe a little.” Honestly, Big Mac thought she gave as good as she got, but humoring her would probably help her mood. Dash certainly had more blood on her at least.

“Good. You kno- hey, watch that around my eyes!”

“Sorry.”

“…she really did start it.”

“Yeah?” Big Mac noticed she kind of looked like a little filly, the way she avoided his eye. He quashed the notion she might be afraid of his disappointment. Making assumptions like that could be hazardous to his health.

“She just flew in out of nowhere and hit me in the side. Then she made a reference and basically told me she was going to take me apart.”

“…Hm.”

“So yeah. You’re not cleaning up the cause. Just wanted you to know.”

“Wouldn’t matter if ya did.”

“What?” She turned back, looking up at him as he rubbed some mud out of a particularly nasty cut above her eyebrow.

“Ya said we’re friends. If ya did start that, Ah’d still stick by ya.”

“But I didn’t.”

“Ah believe ya. Ah’m just sayin’.”

“…I don’t start fights anymore.” Salad said, looking away again.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. So… so don’t tell Ivan, alright?”

“Ah won’t. He’ll probably find out anyway though.”

“Maybe.”

“…Ya need help with yer wing?”

“You back the buck off or I’ll murder you!” In a flash, Salad was backed up against the door looking ready to kill.

Big Mac didn’t bat an eye.

“Did Ah offend you?”

“You asked to feel up my wing, of course I’m offended!”

“…Would it help if Ah said Ah don’t know what yer fussin’ about?”

“…really? How could you not know, that’s like, lesson one about dealing with pegasi.”

“Most of the town’s earth ponies, and Ah don’t get around much to begin with.”

“…Well, uh…” Salad looked uncomfortable. Only Mac’s titanic self control enabled him to keep his face straight at the sight.

“Alright, so… it’s like… you ever been with a unicorn?”

“Yeah.”

“Like, been with.”

“Ah know what ya meant.”

“Did they ever want you to…” She paused, awkwardly, probably not liking this at all. “…play with their horn?”

“Ooooh yeah.” The stallion allowed a smirk as fond private memories started playing back in his head.

Then he frowned.

“…really?”

“Yeah.”

“…Sorry. Wasn’t mah intention.”

“…I believe you.” Salad echoed as she visibly relaxed. “…I’ll take care of it myself though, if you don’t mind.”

“Not at all.”

“…would you, ah… get my back though? Hard to reach. Watch the wing though.”

“Sure.” He said, wetting the cloth as the mare trotted back to him.

With her back turned, he ran his eyes over the wing in question. To be honest, half the reason he offered in the first place was because he had never taken a good look at a pegasus wing before. Or any wing for that matter.

Aside from how dirty the plumage was, the wing seemed… like a wing. Big Mac didn’t have an eye for such a thing.

The feathers looked soft though. He idly wondered how they’d feel.

…he also let his mind play with how similar they might be to a unicorn’s horn, as far as foreplay went.

“Feel better?” He asked, putting the thoughts aside for later.

“Huh?”

“Ya looked madder then a kicked hornets nest before. Ya feelin’ better now?”

“…a little.” She said.

“…Right. Ah’ll leave the rest to you. Dash’ll probably be back pretty soon.”

“Kay.”

--

“…oh dear oh dear oh dear.” Fluttershy paced the floor, at a loss of what to do.

If she left, and found Rainbow, she could possibly explain things before they escalated too far. This was good.

If, however, Rainbow had found that pink mare before Fluttershy found her, that would involve being in the general proximity of said pink mare. Which might lead to even more unpleasant things for everypony.

That was bad. Very bad.

“Hey, Fluttershy, can I use your bathroom while I’m here?”

“Oh, of course Rainbow, I’ll ju- oh my gosh what happened to you.”

“Huh? Oh…” The cyan mare looked herself over. “Yeah, I guess I did get worked over a bit. Hey, take a picture, I could look like this next Nightmare Night.”

“You’re bleeding!”

“Oh, sorry, look, I’m not getting it on anything that’s not hardwood floor, so that’s easy to clean up.”

“You’re bleeding what happened to you are you alright is anything broken are you dying please say you aren’t-“

“Alright. Not dying. I look a little corpsey, but I’m not dying. Come on, you’re a vet that lives next to Everfree. You’ve seen worse then this.” Fluttershy bit her lip as she avoided Dash’s eye.

“Um… well yes, but…”

“Great, tell me about it sometime. Right now though, wanna help me get cleaned up?”

“Oh, of course. I’ll get the first aid kit. You look like you need stitches.” Fluttershy said as she started digging through a cupboard.

“Yeah, well, blame it on the cleats she was wearing. Cheater.”

“…I beg your pardon?” Fluttershy said as she stopped searching. If Rainbow had been paying more attention, she would’ve noted Fluttershy’s voice had the same chill her own had when she heard about the alleged threats. As it stood, she was already trotting her way toward the bathroom.

“Yeah, that sister of Ivan’s. We threw down at Sweet Apple Acres. Don’t worry though, I totally hit her harder then she did me- …Fluttershy?”

Dash turned to see a rather surprised Angel looking at the open window.

“Oh buck me, she went after her, didn’t she?”

Angel nodded.

“Well. I guess I’m going for a rematch. Wish me luck.” Angel idly held up a paw, which Rainbow bumped with her hoof as she passed. “I’ll make sure nothing happens to her.”

The bunny’s look plainly promised bad things if anything did. Dash chuckled and took off.

--

Salad, now presentable, walked out of the farmhouse to see Big Mac looking out in what looked like a random direction.

“Where are my cleats?”

“Put ‘em aside for washin’. Also so ya wouldn’t scratch up mah floors.”

Salad grumbled, but seemed to accept it.

“Birdwatching?”

“Waitin’ for Fluttershy.” He said. “That’s her right there.”

Salad squinted and saw a yellow shape approaching at a decent speed.

“Do I have to do this? If her first impression was any indication, she’s just going to cower and stutter. Then that rainbow freak’ll pop up, think I’m the bad pony, and attack me again.”

“Maybe.”

“If she does, I’m using my blade. There won’t be anything left this time.”

Big Mac sighed.

“Alright. Yer just gonna sit there and play nice, and we’ll get this all sorted, and it’ll never happen again.”

“Oh, is that the plan?” She scowled. “When it rains, it pours. This is gonna go sour.”

“Just sit tight. Fluttershy might surprise ya.”

Salad decided this was unlikely.

A minute later, the pegasus landed softly and trotted towards them with a purpose. Salad noted she didn’t look happy.

Neither her or Big Mac expected her to march right up to Salad and Stare her down.

“Did you hurt Rainbow Dash?” Salad knew that tone. That was the tone Rainbow had earlier before they started brawling. The tone of a pony who had shoved aside everything else in the entire bucking world, including reason, for the sake of one single objective.

She wanted to answer and tell the twit exactly what she’d done to Rainbow, but the words wouldn’t come. And a feeling unfamiliar to her slowly started creeping up her spine as she found herself unable to look anywhere except a pair of wide angry eyes.

“Rainbow Dash is my friend.” Fluttershy said stepping forward as Salad slowly tried to back away. “And nopony…”

Salad found her back up to a wall, both figuratively and literally. Fluttershy continued, looming over her.

“…but nopony…”

Those eyes seemed to consume her entire world, and Salad had never found herself in a position like this.

That unfamiliar feeling, she realized, was fear.

Fluttershy, using some blighted magic she had never even heard of, had made herself the most threatening thing Salad had ever encountered in her life and she was terrified.

The wall of the farmhouse pressed up against her back, and Fluttershy had her trapped.

She had to escape. She had to get far far away from this sunless demon so the world could start making sense again, otherwise she could be trapped forever.

Run. By the moon, run run run run run run run run run run

“…hurts m-hurk-“ Big Mac’s eyes widened further as he saw Salad break eye contact with the Stare, and buck Fluttershy in the chest with enough force to probably empty an apple tree.

The yellow mare barely had enough time to land on her back before Salad had bolted. She was out of sight in mere seconds.

Bic Mac shook the surprise aside as he realized that desperate wheezing he was hearing was Fluttershy. He walked over and knelt by her prone body.

“Easy there. Yer alright. Just give it a second.”

Slowly, propped up against Bic Mac’s foreleg, she managed to start breathing again. And after a few moments to calm down, she looked up at him.

“That’s… never happened before.”

“The Stare not workin’, gettin’ winded, or gettin’ hit at all?”

“…yes.”

“…Huh.” He said contemplatively. “Well. What do ya suppose we do now?” He asked as Fluttershy shakily got to her hooves.

“Hey, I’m back.” Said a much cleaner Rainbow Dash as she landed. “Sorry I took so long, Rarity roped me out of the air when she saw how dirty I was. She even gave me those stitches you said I needed Flutters.”

She looked the area over for a moment. “So, what’d I miss?”

Big Mac and Fluttershy exchanged a look, wondering how they could possibly explain anything without Rainbow taking off again while swearing revenge.

“And where’s that pink mule? Did she go home or something? Did I miss all the fun?”

Big Mac sighed. Pa warned him about days like this.

Author's Note

Hey, quick question, anybody have an actual idea for Pony Easter? I'll edit it in later, but I couldn't come up with something decent myself before posting this. Please and thank you.

The Breaking Point

Chapter Three: The Breaking Point
or
This One Made Me Hungry

Big Mac studied the door. Really it looked like pretty much every door he had ever seen. Ordinary wood and knob.

Fluttershy shifted awkwardly behind him, and Ivan watched silently nearby, leaning idly against a wall. Once he heard something had happened concerning his sister, he considered himself at least somewhat involved, given that he was one of three ponies in the entire world who could properly handle her.

Mac raised a hoof and knocked on the door.

“What?” He heard Salad say. She sounded normal enough, though that didn’t say much. In Big Mac’s limited experience, her mood swung more often then the pendulum of a grandfather clock.

He glanced at Ivan, who hadn’t visibly reacted. Smooth sailing so far, the draft pony supposed.

“It’s Big Mac.”

“Sup?” Even he could tell she only asked because she didn’t know what else to say. He pressed on.

“Ah’m worried about ya. Ivan said ya’ve been shut up in there since the, ah… incident.”

“Yeah? Maybe I just don’t feel like leaving.” Big Mac sighed.

“Could Ah come in then?”

“What is it with you and inappropriate questions lately?” Ivan’s eyebrow raised, but he said nothing.

“Ya know what Ah mean. Ah’m sure ya like talkin’ through a door as much as Ah do.”

“I thought I was the only one who loved it this much. Great to know I’m not alone here.”

“Salad.” Big Mac said, tone sharpening a bit. “We need ta talk.”

“We’ve been talking for a good few minutes now.”

“Are ya gonna be difficult?”

Ivan winced. Big Mac guessed that meant he misstepped.

“Maybe you could tell me what you want? Might be a good place to start.” The door said. “Or are you going to tell me I did something wrong? Do I need to apologise for something? Is that rainbow idiot trying for a rematch? How about that yellow witch?”

“…Witch?” Big Mac asked. Of all the words he expected Salad to use, he hadn’t expected that.

“Yeah, witch. I can’t think of anything else that’d have eyes like that.” The eyes in question widened, and Fluttershy’s expression betrayed her racing thoughts. Big Mac opened his mouth to stop Salad, but the damage was already being done.

“Did she ever do that to you? Look you in the eye?”

“No, but-“

“I can’t be the first. She strutted right up to me and did some… thing, and suddenly all I could think about was sitting there and hoping to the bucking sun that it would stop. It’s like mind control. I can’t remember ever feeling anything like that and…” Big Mac could almost feel the shudder in her voice.

“It’s not natural…”

Hooffalls sounded loudly as Fluttershy turned and bolted, tears running nearly as fast as she was.

“Who was that?” Salad asked as Big Mac’s teeth grit. Just another thing on the pile of stuff to sort through, and he was the only one who could play mediator. Perfect.

He took a deep breath.

“Salad, why are ya angry?”

“I’m angry because today, some yellow freak of nature set a colourful guard dog on me, and when that didn’t work, she came up to me with some evil voodoo and tried to break my mind, and I only barely got away before she forced me to do whatever she wanted. And now you’re here probably getting ready to tell me that somewhere here, I bucked up, and I need to make it all better. Nevermind that I got attacked by two strangers. Nevermind that anything I did was in self defense. Never-horsefeathering-mind that all I wanted today was to go somewhere where nopony stares at my back and wonders if all my probably rock bottom self esteem needs is a compliment or two to get me in bucking bed!”

Big Mac, taken aback, glanced at big brother. Ivan seemed to be contemplating some form of painful murder. Normal for him, he supposed.

Salad, recovering from the outburst, didn’t say anything else. Big Mac decided it was his turn.

“Ya told me earlier that ya don’t start fights. Right?”

“Yeah.”

“And Ah believed ya. Ah still do.”

“…and?”

“All Ah want is ta talk Salad. Ah’ve got their sides of the story, and Ah need yers so we can get this buried behind us. Ah’m not gonna make ya say sorry, not gonna tell ya that anything ya did was just plain wrong, and Ah’m not gonna tell ya that yer the bad pony here. Do ya believe me?”

Salad said nothing. Then Big Mac heard hoofsteps approaching the door.

A light click told him it was now unlocked.

“Get in here before I change my mind.”

He sighed in relief and nearly obeyed. Then he paused.

“Ivan?”

“Mm?”

“Keep a lookout for Rainbow Dash, would ya? And anypony else?” A crying Fluttershy would probably attract a lynch mob. He decided to cover his bases this time around.

“Mm.” The green pony nodded, turning and heading towards the front door.

Satisfied that the situation would finally start improving for a change, Big Mac entered Salad’s room.

Salad hadn’t lived in it for long, and it showed. A bookshelf stood against the wall, mostly empty except for a set of textbooks that Cheerilee had presumably set aside. Nothing else really stood out except for a pair of green saddlebags on the desk, and a black leather photo album on the bedside table.

The mare herself was settled on the bed, polishing her wingblade. Big Mac approached, tugged out the chair from the desk, and seated himself nearby.

Salad hadn’t looked at him when he entered. He would almost say she was ignoring him if she hadn’t invited him herself.

“Are ya alright?” Big Mac found himself asking. Her responding glare spoke volumes.

“Weren’t you listening when I-“

“Ah was.” He cut her off. “Ya’ve been through a lot today. Fight with Rainbow Dash, the Stare-“

“Oh, is that what it’s called?”

“Stop bitin’ at me Salad.” Big Mac said, eyes locked on hers. Seconds passed before she broke eye contact first, huffing. She set aside the wingblade, so he supposed he had her attention now.

“Ah’m not here for ya ta vent on.” He continued. “Ah’m here because if this don’t get sorted, more trouble’s probably gonna come yer way. Ah wanna help.”

“…Yeah?”

“Ah wanna know if yer alright. Ah’ve been where ya are now before. Misunderstandings all over the place, and yer caught in the middle? Feels like nopony’s takin’ yer side?”

“Is this the part where you offer me a hug?”

“Do ya want one?”

“No.” She said. “So… I’m alright. Aside from wanting to stab somepony, I’m pretty alright now.”

“Ah thought that was normal.”

“You’re learning.” She said. She didn’t smirk, but he could hear the ghost of one in her tone. Mood successfully lifted, Big Mac pressed on.

“Now… could ya tell me what happened? Don’t leave anythin’ out.”

“Fine… I guess it started Tuesday. That yellow pegasus bumped into me and…”

--

The only reason Angel wasn’t out there putting to motion one of the many plans he had for this mystery mare’s demise was because he had to hold down the fort. He also had to be there for when mother came back to remind her to do the shopping. His stash was now empty and he hadn’t had a carrot in over an hour. And that was terrible.

…off in the distance, he could just barely make out a shade of yellow he was quite familiar with. Well great, something could actually get done around the house for a change.

Also mother totally owed him a salad sundae for cleaning up that blood. He was patient though, he didn’t mind at all waiting until mother got the shopping done before coll-

“I’m a monster!” cried Fluttershy as she flew in through the open window and buried herself in blankets, sobbing.

Angel watched her quivering form under the covers for a moment before making his way downstairs and to a small chest with his belongings in it.

He extracted a rainbow flag and hopped to the window.

“See how easy that was?” Said Rainbow Dash a few minutes later.

Angel didn’t even bother glaring. He thrust the shopping list at the pegasus.

“…so I guess Flutters isn’t back yet?” Angel shook his head no, pokerface up and deflecting suspicion.

“Well I guess everypony around here’s getting hungry? Fine, I can do this. Might take a bit though, some of those salesponies are pretty stubborn. Tell Shy she can pay me back later.”

Angel nodded his acceptance, and Dash was off.

He hopped his way back up the stairs, made sure there was nobody watching…

And he crawled into the blankets and hugged his crying mother. Before long, she’d calm down, and tell him what on Equestria convinced her that she of all ponies was a monster.

Then he could wave the flag again (or throw a carrot, as he would have those by then) and see about correcting a mistake or two.

--

“Did Dash come at all?” Big Mac asked when he exited the house. Ivan, like he usually was, had been resting under a tree nearby.

“No.” He replied, not looking away from the sky. “She alright?”

“I’m fine bro.” She said from behind the farmpony.

“Good.” He said. “Needed?”

“We’ll take it from here.” Big Mac said.

Ivan nodded, took a look at the sun’s position, got up, and started walking.

“Where’s he going?”

“School’s out soon. He’s probably gonna go see Cheerilee.”

“Huh. Well whatever. Where does the witch live?”

“Salad…”

“I’ll decide if she’s a witch or not after we talk to her.” Big Mac sighed, as he began to suspect he had found a mare even more stubborn than his sister.

Sisters save them all.

“So, where’s she live?” She asked as they started walking.

“Just on the edge of Everfree. Over there.”

“…the edge of Everfree?”

“Eeyup.”

“You mean that crazy killer forest that nearly got my brother turned to stone?”

“Eeyup.”

“…and… you’re saying she’s not a witch?”

“She talks to animals.”

“So she’s crazy.”

“It’s her talent.” Salad groaned.

“What is it with this town and cool talents? Hey, what’s yours? Can you bench-press a barn?”

“Ah can pull a house 'cross town.”

“…that’s your special talent?” She said, naked surprise written all over her face. Big Mac committed it to memory and smirked.

“Pullin’ a house is just a thing Ah can do.”

“…Well then.”

“Just like a thing you do is jumpin’ like some sorta hero outta Applebloom’s comic books.”

“Well that makes me feel better.”

Big Mac raised an eyebrow at her.

“Seriously, it does. So, what, does she tell everything in the killer forest not to eat her?”

“…Ah… don’t know.” The stallion said, with a bemused look on his face. “Ta be honest, Ah don’t think anypony’s ever questioned her ‘bout this.”

“…really? You’re all talking about her like she’s some prissy little princess waiting to get kidnapped and locked in a tower, hits like a summer breeze, delicate and pretty butterfly… And she’s living next to a killer forest? And none of you are questioning this?”

“Well if she can scare you, Ah think she can take care of herself.”

“…Touche. Also you’re a jackass.”

“Ah learned from the best.” Salad snorted a laugh to herself, and Big Mac started feeling like everything was going to be alright.

--

“…really? A dragon?”

“That’s what mah sister told me.”

“…this town is bucking nuts. That the place?”

“That’s the place.”

“…That… looks like an awesome place to live.” Salad said as she laid eyes on Fluttershy’s cottage. The large house nestled in a corner of the forest’s edge granted what was undoubtedly a wonderful view of the surrounding countryside from the balcony.

“Sure does.” Big Mac agreed as they got closer.

“So… she’s not mad about any of that from before?”

“Nnnope.”

“She won’t do that thing again?”

“Nnnope.”

“…so how do I handle her?”

“Just walk up there, knock on the door, and do what ya normally do.”

“…what’s that?”

“Don’t stop till ya get what ya want.”

“Oh har har.” The mare droned as she stepped forward.

She hesitated, something that made Mac raise an eyebrow, before raising a hoof to the door.

“Don’t you even think about it.” Big Mac turned to see Rainbow Dash making sure a rather large set of packages (they looked like Dash would normally need a wagon to carry them all) stayed where they were, before turning towards the pink mare.

“’Sup Stiches?” Salad quipped, looking over the other mare.

“What are you even here for?” Rainbow asked. “I thought this was over with.”

“Apparently it isn’t.” Salad said. “We fighting again? Because I’m not starting it. And I’ve got a bayonet I’ll go get that says you starting it is a bad idea.”

“Don’t think you can win without it?”

“…You know what?” Salad asked, eye twitching. “Just go away.”

“…huh?.”

“I’m not here to start a fight. If I was, do you think Red would be here with me?”

“…why are you here?”

“Because she did something earlier that I didn’t like. And apparently I said something that she didn’t like. Red says I have to deal with it before more idiots like you come out of nowhere to defend her honor.”

“…alright, fair enough.” Dash said.

“…really?”

“Yeah. If you’re not gonna step over the line again-“

“I didn’t step over it at all.” Salad cut off. “Now go away.”

“Nah. I’ve got a delivery to make. Tell ya what, I’ll go in there and send her out. She’s gotta make sure everything’s there anyway. Then you can talk to her, settle everything, and go back to doing whatever unlikable jerks do.”

“…Sounds good.” Salad said, leaning against a fencepost. “After you.”

Dash walked up to knock on the door as Big Mac thanked the sisters that the two weren’t currently brawling in Fluttershy’s front yard.

Both of Salad’s eyebrows rose as a little bunny rabbit answered the door.

“Hey Angel. Got the supplies right over there. Also could you get Fluttershy out here?”

Angel cocked his head to the side.

“That pink mare over there’s the one all the fuss is about. Apparently she’s here to settle things.”

The door slammed shut.

“…so should I just jump to the window then?” Asked Salad.

“…you know, come to think of it, I think I might’ve phrased that wrong.” Said Dash. “I think I might’ve made it sound like you were here to-“

The growl of a vicious beast silenced any attempt of conversation. Then from behind the cottage, out stomped a very angry grizzly bear.

Angel was on its head.

“…what.” Said Salad. “What.”

Angel jabbed a paw at Salad and the bear started charging. Salad stood there shaking.

Big Mac was about to intervene when a wooshCRACK again caused silence in the area. The bear was knocked onto its back.

Salad landed a few meters away, cracking her neck.

“I am sick of these motherbucking friends in this motherbucking town. Ever since that yellow witch happened, all I’ve had is trouble. It ends here.” Salad pointed her hoof at the grizzly, which was now picking itself up off the ground and growling angrily.

“You just cut to the front of the line, teddybear. Let’s get dangerous.”

--

Fluttershy awoke from her afternoon nap (since she didn’t leave the bed, sleeping seemed like the only option) and decided perhaps sleeping on her current problem was a good idea.

She was calmer now, and could think things through.

She could work on her apology, make sure Rainbow Dash didn’t pick any more fights, go out and do the shopping…

She could get her life back on track now. And after some more thought, maybe she could write a letter to Celestia about proper Stare usage. Or something.

Her thoughts paused when she heard a roar from the front of her house. She wondered if Mr. Grizzles’ back was out again. First thing was first, she supposed.

She opened her front door tooh my Celestia.

Big Mac and Rainbow Dash stood on the sidelines, the mare’s mouth opening and closing in disbelief. Big Mac was more composed, but looked like he was at a loss as to what he should do.

Salad, deep gashes littering her body, stood on the fallen form of Mr. Grizzles, screaming victory to the heavens.

And Fluttershy recognized the look on Angel’s face. That was the look of him trying to come up with a plan b.

She flew into action.

“Angel.” The bunny turned and suddenly looked quite terrified at the mare suddenly standing behind him. “You are grounded.”

Fluttershy turned, slowly, at the now silent Salad. “And you. You.” The yellow pegasus’ eyes started to widen, and Salad stumbled backwards in her attempts to get as far away as she could.

She landed at Big Mac’s hooves. And she looked up at the stallion, pleading for help.

“Ah’ve got ya.” He said, before looking up at Fluttershy.

Fluttershy met his gaze, and he was taken aback at how angry the mare looked.

She took deep breaths, and Big Mac could see her counting to ten in her head.

“…Are you alright?” She asked, turning away and kneeling down by the bear’s head. A rumble in the bear’s throat sounded like he was ready to get up and hurt something, but evidently, Fluttershy knew better.

“We’ll talk about what happened later.” The pegasus said. “You don’t look too bad. You just need a rest. I’ll be by later with something for the pain.”

Fluttershy turned and whistled sharply in the direction of the cottage. Several animals poked their heads out from hiding places all around them.

“May I please have some help getting Mr. Grizzles to his bed?”

The other ponies watched as dear came out and supported the bear under his arms, birds tried to haul him up by the shoulders, a raccoon used it’s tail to sweep clean the path before them of sharp rocks.

Fluttershy walked with them, comforting the groaning bear.

She turned back.

“Please wait inside.”

Nopony argued.

--

Big Mac and Dash seated themselves, but Salad couldn’t relax, pacing nervously and twitching her feathers.

Neither of the other two told her to stop, even if she was dripping blood all over the place.

There was a light click from the back door, and Salad’s head whipped up and in the direction of the noise. They heard some clutter from the back, and Fluttershy emerged balancing a first aid kit on her back.

“Would you please sit over here?” She asked.

“…why?” the pink mare asked cautiously.

“You need those wounds looked at.”

Salad slowly made her way to the chair Fluttershy pulled out. And tried to control her breathing as the other mare set to work.

“Rainbow, could you please go get some water and a cloth from the kitchen?”

“Sure.”

Fluttershy opened the kit and started taking things out. Gauze, bandages, a needle, some thread… Salad wondered how bad she was messed up. She supposed it was the adrenaline that was dulling the pain.

“I’m sorry.” Fluttershy finally said. The water and cloth was set next to her and Dash returned to her chair, saying nothing.

“…yeah?”

“I… haven’t been very nice to you.”

“…kay.”

“Why did you hurt Mr. Grizzles?”

“I did what I always do when something attacks me.” Salad replied. “Ask Skittles over there.”

“You were attacked?”

“There was a bunny on his head.”

“…I’m sorry.”

“I don’t care anymore.” Said Salad. “If you’re going to fix me up, that’s great. After that, I’ll do you all a favor and just keep my distance.”

Fluttershy fell silent after that, wringing out the cloth and grabbing disinfectant.

“…I don’t have my cleats. They’re still at Red’s.” Salad said, after a while. “And my bayonet’s at home. So I didn’t hit the bear with any of that. He’ll have a headache, but that’s it, really.”

“That’s good. I didn’t have a chance to take a close look at him.”

“No?”

“You looked worse off.” Said Fluttershy as she threaded the needle.

“Even if I might’ve hurt your friend?”

“None of this is about what I want. You need my help more than him.”

Minutes later, nothing else was said, Salad was stitched and bandaged, and the three left the cottage as the sun was starting to hang low over the horizon.

Rainbow Dash awkwardly scratched behind her head with a hoof, before giving Salad and Big Mac a nod and taking off toward home.

Mac walked Salad to her door, wished her goodnight, and headed back to the farm to eat and sleep the entire ordeal behind him.

Salad, deciding that ‘Red’ had the right idea, cooked the biggest meal she had ever made, comprised entirely of comfort food, and ate herself almost sick.

And she bedded down, content that she would never have to deal with any of them ever again.

--

Salad awoke the next morning, called in sick to work, and spent the morning relaxing.

A knock sounded at the door and since Cheerilee and Ivan were out, it fell on her to answer.

“Hi Salad!” said Ditzy. “How’s your day going?”

“It goes.” She replied. “Got something for the teacher?”

“Something for you!” She said.

“Huh, I guess mom and dad finally got around- wait there’s no return address.”

“It was a favor. I got a muffin for it!”

“I’m sure you did. So wh-“

“Sorry, but I’ve gotta fly! Enjoy your gift!”

Salad watched her go, wobbling in the air, before looking down at the package. It was warm.

Soon it was unwrapped on the table, revealing a sealed envelope and a freshly baked vegetable pie.

Ignoring how appetizing it smelled for the moment, she turned her attention to the letter. Cutting the envelope with her nearby blade, she looked over the page.

I talked to Angel and found out everything that happened. I’m making sure he knows better from now on.

Mr. Grizzles doesn’t hold anything against you and won’t be angry with you if you ever find yourself in the area.

I’m sorry. I hope this helps make it up to you.

-Fluttershy.

Salad set the letter down, wondering if she should just ignore it altogether. She was quite convinced that interacting with that mare might be bad luck.

…In the end though, the pie smelled too good to resist. She served herself up a slice and took a bite.

…Yams. Her favorite.

Salad groaned.

In Which No Progress Is Made

In Which No Progress Is Made
or
Oh Wow, I Just Made That Pie Up But Now I Really Want One

“Mom? Is that for me?”

“Non. Ripple Skip down the way gave us zis dish. I am returning it.”

“…but there’s a pie in it.”

“And z'ere was a pie in it when we received it, oui? It is polite, Sally. A good way to say thank you for zat cinnamon pudding pie you enjoyed so much”

“Ooooh.”

“While I am zere, I will ask for ze recipe. Would you like to learn how to make it?”

“Yeah. Ivan’d love to try it when he comes home.”

“…Indeed he would. Come, walk me zere. I will need protection.”

“But you fence like nopony’s business mom!”

“And you are impossible, Sally. More then a match for any villain.”

“…well since you put it that way…”

--

Ding!

Salad set down the newspaper and trotted her way to the oven, lifting out a pair of freshly baked cinnamon pudding pies.

She had put every bit of effort she could spare into it. Her mother would’ve been proud. And probably hungry. It took more than a little willpower for Salad not to take a little taste of home.

One pie was set into a wooden box Cheerilee had handed her for the task. A little something to prevent accidents and keep it warm. The other was put aside with a note to her brother.

The pegasus stepped out into the open air, box balanced on her back and held steady with her wing.

Trying not to think about how against this she would normally be if not for her mother’s influence, she set off for the cottage.

The day was perfect. A little cloudy, but the weather team would probably be done soon. The walk was actually pretty relaxing. Quiet.

“Hiya.” If she weren’t walking and carrying something, she would’ve facehoofed.

“What do you want?”

“Look… we got off on the wrong hoof.” Rainbow started, treading air and keeping pace with her.

“Nope. We didn’t.” Said Salad. “You flew by the farm, I took one look at you, and decided knowing you was more trouble then it was worth. And golly gee, you attack me next time I see you! I’d say we got off on just the right hoof.”

“…are you always this much of a jerk?”

“I go with what works.” Salad said.

“It might’ve had something to do with getting mauled by a bear. And me.”

“No approach is perfect.”

“I’m just saying that maybe if you-“

“Alright, are you honestly telling me that ‘we got off on the wrong hoof, but I’m totally blameless here’? Because if so, just go away.”

“I’m not, just- argh! You’re worse then Gilda!”

“Forgetting how much I don’t care who that is, do I win something?”

“Yeah, a reality check!” Rainbow growled, landing in front of her. “What did I ever d- alright stupid question, but how do you expect to make any friends like this? I’ve heard about you. You treat everypony this way.”

“Not Ivan.”

“Well-“

“Not Cheerilee. Not Red. Not Ditzy. And I don't even care about the mailmare. The other two, though, I’m pretty friendly with.”

“I’m surprised you can be friendly.”

“Look, I get what you’re trying to do.” Salad said. “And I still don't care. If you were planning on saying sorry, you would’ve done it by now. Since you’re not, get out of my way. I’ve got stuff to do. Or do you want to run through a few of my character flaws again?”

Rainbow grit her teeth, wings out and trembling, and Salad hoped the other mare wouldn’t deck her. The pie might get ruined if a fight started.

…Salad was surprised when, though with visible effort, Rainbow calmed down.

“I’m sorry.” She said. “I acted before I knew what was going on and hit you blind. Knowing you, you probably needed a buck in the head for something, but I had no business being the one to give it to you.”

“…Apology accepted.” Salad said with a sigh. “I’m no longer sorry I didn’t hit you harder.”

“I’ll take what I can get I guess. So what’s in the box?”

“My way of returning a favor.”

“Does it have anything to do with that pie Shy sent?”

“…Maybe.” Dash laughed, falling into step beside her.

“I know all about that. I was the one who ran out to get the yams for her, actually.” Dash didn’t notice Salad’s eye twitch.

“…yeah?”

“Yeah. So what, you baked her a pie too? I thought you hated us.”

“The pie came in her own dish. This is how you return dishes.”

“…it is?” Salad rolled her eyes.

“You just gave ‘em back licked clean, didn’t you?”

“No!”

“Eh. Well, now you know you’re inconsiderate. We’re both horrible ponies.”

“Can that be from both of us?”

“As if you could make anything this good.”

“…so no…?”

“Buck no.”

“Be a friend.”

“We’re not friends.”

“We could be. I could’ve taken that bear too, but seeing you do it was hardcore.”

“I want nothing to do with you. It’s great you’re sorry, and now I don’t wish your head would explode, but that doesn’t mean a whole lot. Why are you still here?”

“Because Fluttershy told me to try.” Dash said with a shrug. “If I can’t make her a pie, I can try being nice to an unlikable mule.”

“…she said that?” Salad asked, finally turning to look Dash in the eye.

“Yeah.” The cyan mare said with a nod. “She said it was her fault everything happened, since she could’ve stopped everything by going out and dealing with it. And… she was kind of right. You won’t hate her, will you?”

Salad still had most of Fluttershy’s pie waiting for her at home. She denied that she was looking forward to it after this awkward business was over with.

“Eh, I kind of beat up two of her friends. We’re cool.”

“Two?”

“Yeah Stitches. Two.”

“You’re one to talk.”

“None of these are from you.” Salad said, looking over her own bandages.

“You had spiked shoes.”

“You can fly.”

“You… I’m bigger then you.”

“Another point to me.”

“Changing the subject.”

“Be my guest.”

“So what happened to your-“

“Changing. The subject.” Salad growled. Dash made a mental note to never cross that line again.

“…I was gonna say brother.” She lied. “I heard something about him leaving home and you coming after him.”

“That’s personal.” Said Salad.

“…Well I also wanted to know if you knew about his cutie mark.”

“…What are you talking about?”

“Pfft, why wouldn’t I take a look at that flank?” Dash said chuckling. “You might not want to hear this, but your brother’s not bad for eye candy.”

“Doesn’t bother me.” Salad said. “I’d tell you, but loose lips and all that.”

“Haven’t mentioned it until now. It’s a secret to everypony. All I know though is that he didn’t have it when I met him. Then he came back from some field trip, those two snob fillies wouldn’t shut up about how beast he is, and he’s marked with something pretty cool.” Salad shrugged. Might as well, she thought.

“He got it fighting that lamia he came back with. That’s all I’m gonna say.”

“…wow. That’s almost as good as the Crusaders.”

“You’re just jealous.”

“Pfft. Mine’s the best around.”

“Put up then. We’ve still got a while before Fluttershy’s, and you're not leaving like I want, so you might as well be entertaining.”

--

“…alright, no.”

“No what?”

“No you did not shatter the light spectrum by going mach ten.”

“Now who’s jelly?”

“And it gave your five best friends their cutie marks?”

“I’m kind of a big deal.”

“Fluttershy making a dragon play nice is more believable then that.”

“I kicked that dragon in the face. Sure it made things worse but I totally did it.”

“…just… just go away. We’re here, we had our ‘we don’t totally hate eachother’ bit, we’re done.”

“Don’t want anypony to see you giving a gift to a mare? You sure I shouldn’t stay? Rare’d want to hear all about it. She’s the kind who reads so far into things like this she hallucinates. Mayb-ow!”

“Thanks fluffy. You’re alright.” Salad said to the scowling Angel. She had just managed to whip her head out of the thrown carrot’s path. The miss had the added bonus of shutting Rainbow up. “Go get the doctor. I’ve got something for her.”

The bunny responded with the universal sign for ‘up yours’.

“Classy. Eh, guess I’ll find her myself then. Throw something at me again, and you better hope you’ve got something bigger then that grizzly bear backing you.”

“I’ve got stuff to do. If I hear you did anything to Shy, I’ll buy a set of cleats and see how you like it.”

Salad didn’t tell Dash exactly where she could stick it, since she didn’t detect any actual threat in the statement. Dash didn’t think she’d try anything.

“Couldn’t hurt. Literally. You hit like my grandma.” The other pegasus waved the comment off and took to the air. Salad turned and started exploring before the bunny found more ammo.

The more she saw, the more it began to feel like Fluttershy’s cottage was more like another Ponyville altogether. Habitats for animals surrounded the house, and Salad wondered how on Equestria the pegasus could afford to take care of them all.

…then again, Salad herself had been fixed up so well that she could barely even feel the healing wounds. Treatment like that could go a long way to having fifty hundred pets.

Knocking on the door hadn’t gotten any response, and the area around the house had several animals (all of which gave her the evil eye and refused to offer assistance), but no ponies.

It was as she started to stray from the yard that she heard singing.

She happened upon her target, back turned and seated in front of a tree full of birds, conducting and singing with them.

The performance was beautiful in a way quite different from the orchestras and plays her parents had taken her to on occasion. It was something born entirely of nature, organised by a pony whom could understand. Instead of the music conveying feelings and motivations, it seemed to convey an entire way of life.

The box was set aside, and Salad took the opportunity to indulge her curiosity. She settled herself under a different tree and listened. Fluttershy would probably tell her to leave if she knew Salad was there, but the birds seemed to be happy to have an audience. They must’ve been unaware of who the one winged mare was.

Minutes passed, until another bird landed nearby and tweeted for Fluttershy’s attention. Salad surmised the bird was speaking to her, since a few tweets later had Fluttershy whirling around in alarm.

Salad avoided her eyes. Neither said anything for a moment or two. The birds waited patiently.

“C-can I help you?” The other mare barely managed to get out. Given the scowl on Salad’s face, she wondered if Fluttershy thought she was angry about something.

“I’m returning this.” Salad said, nudging forward the box. Fluttershy slowly trotted closer and Salad hogtied the part of herself that was telling her to run like the sky was falling.

“You d-didn’t like it?” The pegasus looked like she was about to cry for some reason.

“It was good.” Salad said.

“O-oh…”

“I’m giving the dish back.” Fluttershy’s eyes widened.

“You made something fo-“

“Yes, why is everypony shocked about this? I can’t be the only one to do this.”

“Well… Applejack does, but…”

“Look, just bucking take it.” Salad said, tapping the box impatiently. The fact that the she was afraid of this stuttering mess was shameful.

When Fluttershy didn’t move for the box right away, mind probably tripping over itself, Salad flipped the lid off the box to reveal the pie in question.

“See, it’s a pie. A totally not threatening, innocent pie. Stop overthinking this and just take it so I can go.”

“Why won’t you look at me?”

“You know why. Now shut up and take the pi-“

“Would you like a slice?” Salad almost turned her head.

“Say what?”

“I don’t think I could eat this all by myself right away. A-and it wouldn’t be good for a lot of my friends here. And pies are b-best fresh, right?”

“…no.”

“I-I’ll brew some tea, an-“

“No.”

“B-bu-“

“Don’t ask me again.” Salad said as calmly as she could manage. Fluttershy’s proximity was threatening her composure, and she just wouldn’t take the stupid hint.

“P-please, I just want to-“ Fluttershy stepped closer, eyes seeking hers out, and Salad soon found herself up against a tree, wing spread wide.

“G-get away!” she yelped in a panic and Fluttershy jumped back, startled.

Salad heard the beginnings of sobbing and decided it was time to go.

“I’m gonna go. J-just send the box over when you’re done with it.” Salad, so eager to leave, ran a safe distance away (since ruining the pie would defeat the whole purpose of even going through that) and jumped as far as she could manage.

She landed a good half of the distance between Ponyville and the cottage.

And there on the side of the road, she took a few minutes to calm her racing heart.

“…Buck it all. I hate you Mom. This is gonna come back and bite me in the flank.”

A Vacation

Chapter Five: A Vacation
or
I Kind Of Feel Like I Just Punched A Baby

“I j-just don’t know what to do…” Fluttershy sobbed. “She’s… I’ve never… had this problem before…”

“Can’t see why you would.” Big Mac said, before taking a drink from his coffee mug. “Yer just about the least threatenin’ thing Ah can imagine.”

“But… she’s…”

“Look.” The stallion said, setting down his mug. “Nopony really knows much about that thing ya can do. Ah’ve never even seen it, so Ah just take what Ah hear. But Ah do know ya’ve never used it on somepony like Salad before.”

“W-what-“

“That one’s used to doing whatever she wants. Swingin’ from cold to hot to whatever takes her fancy. How would a pony like that react to somethin’ she can’t fight that forces her ta do something she don’t wanna do?”

“U-um…”

“Salad ain’t like the animals ya deal with. Considerin’ what she had to grow up with… think about what it might feel like to be trapped like that.”

“I’m so sorry, I-“

“Ah’m not tellin’ ya to make ya regret nothin’. Ah’m tellin’ ya so ya’ll understand. Ya didn’t mean no harm, she just didn’t know that. No approach is perfect.”

“So… so what do I do?”

“Don’t rightly know. Leave it fer now. Ah’ll see about softenin’ her up in the meantime.”

“Thank you. I don’t know what I’d do if I had to go on knowing I…”

“No trouble. That slice o’ pie ya brought by’s more then enough.”

“She made it, actually.” His eyes widened.

“Really now?”

“She gave it to me in the dish she was returning. But… she was only doing it because she felt like she had to.”

“Tha’s too bad.” He said. “Wonder how good it might’ve tasted if she made it with love?”

“Ivan might know.” Fluttershy mused, as she began drying her eyes. “…that wasn’t the only reason I came by.”

“Yeah? So the pie was to butter me up for a favour?” He smiled kindly, and Fluttershy averted her gaze bashfully.

“Well, um… remember last year when I needed your help?”

“…Ah. Yer ‘special patient’?

“Yes. Um… it’s time again.” Big Mac sighed.

“…Ah wish Ah could. Really Ah do. Ya’ve caught me at a bad time though.”

“Oh, it’s no worry, I shouldn’t have asked, and I brought the pie because I wanted to, not because I thought it wou-“

“Cool off Fluttershy, Ah would, but the situation’s a bit different this time around. A.J.’s off on some adventure she couldn’t talk much about, so that means Ah’m keepin’ the farm up while she’s gone. Granny Smith’s good for lookin’ after A.B., but she ain’t much for the jobs ‘round here.”

“I understand…”

“Anypony else you can ask?” Fluttershy shook her head.

“No. Ivan’s out helping Rarity with something, and Twilight’s um… busy.” She didn’t elaborate. Big Mac shrugged. It was all the same to him.

“Pinkie said she’s in the middle of a friend emergency, and I couldn’t even talk to Rainbow Dash…”

“So Ah was yer last resort?”

“…I’m sorry?”

“Hm…” He put a hoof to his chin and leaned back in his chair, closing his eyes. Not a lot of ponies aside from the already exhausted prospects were up for an adventure. Moreover, the situation was a delicate one. Fluttershy couldn’t just take anypony along. Secrets would be blurted out in a heartbeat.

“…There’s… one Ah can think of.”

“Oh?”

“She’d be good to have around. Strong, capable.”

“…you’re talking about Salad.”

“Not a lot o’ options open.”

“Well… I don’t mind. But convincing her…” She sniffed back a tear and Big Mac frowned.

“How much time do we have?”

“The trip would take three days. And while I should get there as soon as possible, it would be better if I arrived sooner then later. The deadline is in five.”

“Mmm. So we got time. Ah’ll see what Ah can do. Ya’ll should see about gettin’ the cure together.”

“I’m already getting help from Zecora. Ever since she arrived, she’s been such a help to me.”

“Good ta hear. Not that Ah want ta get rid o’ ya, but Ah’ve got quite the job ahead o’ me. Best to start now.”

“Oh, I can’t thank you enough.”

“Ya could try warmin’ up that oven o’ yers. Ah never say no to somethin’ tasty.”

“I’ll see what I can do.” The pegasus said, smiling gratefully. The stallion nodded, and walked her to the door.

--

“Oh, ‘sup Red?” Salad said when she opened the door.

“Not a lot.” He replied. “Feelin’ alright?”

“Totally. No reason I wouldn’t be.” Big Mac coughed. Salad ignored it, and let him in.

“Cheerilee’s out doing Cheerilee things, and Ivan’s out doing… I suppose Ivan things. Maybe he’s raiding a tomb somewhere, I dunno. I’ll take a message.”

“Ah’m here fer you, actually.” Salad paused as she made her way to the kitchen. Possibly to get something to drink for him. She glanced over her shoulder.

“…yeah?”

“Mm.”

“…oh. Do you take coffee?” Big Mac smiled.

“Black, please.”

“Kay.”

The stallion sat himself in the living room and waited, hearing the clinking of mugs and other things.

Before long, two steaming servings of coffee were cooling on the table and Salad was looking unsure of herself.

“So… you needed something?”

“Ah’m sorry I gotta ask ya. If there were anypony else, Ah would.”

“Don’t sweat it. You had my back the other day. Even if I did have to fight that bear all by myself.” Big Mac took a breath.

“Flutters-“

“Oh, Celestia, that’s why you’re sorry.” Salad fell back in her seat, hoof over her face. “Look, I’m not going near that mare if I don’t have to. I’m saying it now. Spread the word.”

“Salad, it’s not like that.” Mac said. He was surprised when the mare let him continue.

“Well, I’ll at least hear you out, I guess.”

“…Thanks. See, this is a… ‘sensitive’ thing.” The pegasus raised an eyebrow.

“How ‘sensitive’ are we talking?”

“Normally there’d be a warder on the case.”

“…that’s pretty sensitive. Begs the question though. Why isn’t there a warder on the case?”

“Warders leave a paper trail.” Big Mac explained, leaning forward. “If one of ‘em came out here on business, there’d be reports. More ponies would know than necessary. And there’s too many variables in doin’ it under the table.”

“So warders are out, but the staring wonder’s on the trolley? What aren’t you telling me here?”

Big Mac paused, and Salad saw he was trying to figure out the best way to begin. And she felt that unique thrill a pony felt when they were about to learn something beyond secret.

“What do ya know ‘bout gods?”

“…I swear, if it were anypony but you, I’d say you were pulling my chain.” Salad took a long drink from her mug. “As far as I’m concerned, they’re one of those things that probably exists, but hay if anypony can prove it.”

“Last year, a god got sick. They’re like alicorns. They can still get sick, ‘n the like. Unlike the alicorns though, every now and again, they’ll catch somethin’ bad, and it’ll stick. Fluttershy can communicate with ‘em like she can… just ‘bout anythin really. Ah went along with her to make sure nothin’ happened.”

“So what, now it’s sick again?”

“Still sick. Yearly dosage for a good decade, or so Ah was told. An’ time’s up.”

“…where would I come in?”

“Ah can’t leave the farm, since A.J.’s gone on a trip. Mah family’s livelihood’d be at stake. An' we’ve got no other options.”

“…Alright, I see where you’re coming from.” Said Salad. “Why me though?”

“Ah trust ya.” Big Mac said, simply. “And ya can fight as good as the rest of us. Ya took on that bear unarmed. Yer resourceful. She’ll need that.”

“… you trust me?” She asked, expression unreadable. Big Mac supposed that was one way she differed from her normally expressive brother.

“There’s still a lot o’ ya Ah want to get to know. But Ah wouldn’t be friends with ya if Ah didn’t see somepony trustworthy.”

“I…” She started, eyes narrowed. She seemed to be struggling with herself.

“Salad?”

“…I know what you’ll say.” Salad said. Her mood seemed to darken as she went on. “But I have to ask anyway. She’s… safe, right?”

“The safest. Ah trust her just as much as Ah trust you.”

“…How much time do I have?”

“The trip’ll take three, and the delivery needs ta happen in five. Fluttershy says though it’d be better if it happened sooner.”

“I’ll take a week off work then. They won’t argue. Can we leave tomorrow?”

“…Ah’ll stop by her cottage later and let her know. The cure’ll be ready by tonight, so it can happen.”

“Alright. I’ll stop by her cottage at dawn then.”

“…Ya sure now?” Big Mac asked, concerned.

“It’s… bigger than me. Right?” Salad answered. “But even if it wasn’t, there’s a life at stake. This is what Ivan would do.”

“…Thank ya.”

“Yeah, whatever. Drink that before it gets cold.”

“Much obliged.”

“…so… that’s what you came for, right?” She asked, gaze off to the side, studying the walls. Big Mac nodded.

“If ya said no, Ah’d have to go and think o’ somethin’ else.” The stallion said. “Since ya said yes though, Ah’m pretty free right now. Why, ya tryin’ to get rid o’ me?”

“Teasing me is the sixth most dangerous thing in the world. My blade is in the kitchen.”

“Yer safe from me. How’s yer day been?”

“Well, until you came in here and dropped the god bomb, not too bad.” Salad shrugged. “Rarity and Ditzy needed my bro for something, so they went off to do things. I plan to come at him with all sorts of junk about immoral love affairs.”

“Ah heard somethin’ ‘bout that. Ivan was one of the prospects for the errand.”

“He would be, I guess.” She smirked. “So I guess I’m Ivan for the next little while.”

“Tell me what it’s like when ya get back.”

“Will do. So, your sister’s gone?” The stallion nodded.

“The princess needed somethin’ done. A.J. didn’t say much since she wasn’t really sure what was goin’ on. ‘Cause o’ this though, Ah know what it’s like ta have ta be hush hush.”

“Does this kind of thing happen often?” Salad wondered. “Ivan’s put up with a lot since he got here. Am I gonna have to start smacking monsters on a regular basis too?”

“That’s nothin’.” Big Mac said with a chuckle. “Let me tell ya what happened the day Twilight Sparkle came to town...”

--

Getting up with the sun wasn’t anything new to Salad. It wasn’t something she necessarily liked though, as it was a habit she only got into because she was chasing her brother.

Even if she had finally caught him, getting up early still had the feel of a prelude to doing something unpleasant.

Six or seven days with the only physical fear she had was pretty up there, she figured. At this rate, she’d swear off mornings altogether.

The witch stood outside the cottage, a slew of animals out and ready to see her off. Red was there too, probably to see both of them off.

Something stirred at the back of her heart, but she ignored it. There was a time for sappy friendship feels, and it wasn’t then.

Among the assembled animals was the grizzly bear. He lazily looked over at the approaching pegasus, and at least Fluttershy was telling the truth about smoothing things over. The bear looked indifferent, if anything.

Curious, Salad walked over to the bear first and studied him for a bit. Red and Fluttershy were talking off to the side, and hadn't noticed Salad was there.

“Doing alright?” Salad asked, catching the attention of the other two ponies.

The bear yawned.

“Good to hear. Let’s not fight again. That was kind of bad for everypony involved.” The bear did a sort of bear-shrug. It was hard to describe what the bear did any other way. Salad nodded and turned to an astonished Fluttershy.

“…you can hear them too?”

“You don’t need a voice to be understood.” Salad replied. “Something dad taught me.”

“Ya like animals?” Red asked. Salad looked up at his eyes.

“They don’t care about how many wings you have.”

Neither of them had a response, so she paused to let them take it in. A quick count to five later, and she spoke again.

“So, are we leaving or what? Cause this isn’t what I left a warm bed for.”

“Right, yes, um…” Fluttershy trotted off to a large bundle Salad didn’t notice at first, leaning against the fence. The thing looked heavy, especially when the demure mare had trouble walking with it slung over her back.

“…you’re not gonna die under that, right?”

“I’ll… be fine…”

“Ask fer help if ya need it.” Said Red. “Ah carried it last time.”

“If it’ll get this over with faster, yeah, I’ll carry the huge mysterious… thing. What is that anyway?”

“A harp.” Red replied, walking over to Fluttershy to help secure it better.

“…why are we bringing a harp?”

“He won’t come if we don’t.” Fluttershy replied, shifting the weight on her back.

“…eh, whatever. Lead the way.”

“Angel.” Said Fluttershy, and the bunny hopped out from the assembly of animals. “Please help look after the others. You know what to do.”

The bunny nodded, and nudged her hoof with his paw. Probably the closest thing to a hug he was willing to give in public. Salad pretended to be blissfully unaware of the way the bunny turned a threatening glare on her.

“Be safe you two.” Big Mac said in parting, and the two mares started down the road.

Fluttershy may have looked back a few times, but Salad was trying to keep her mind and eyes as far away from the mare in question as she could.

“…um…” Salad heard after a while, causing her skin to prickle and her feathers to fluff as she was reminded that she would be with this mare for days.

“What?”

“I j-just wanted to than-“

“Don’t.” Salad said.

“O-oh. But-“

“I’m not doing this for you. And I’ve been thanked already.” Salad said, facing away from the mare behind her. “If you still wanna thank me somehow, just don’t look at me.”

“…alright.” Fluttershy said sadly, and the pink mare ground her teeth at the sound of it. Every time Fluttershy opened her mouth, it made Salad hate her just a little more.

The spineless excuse of a pegasus cried and cowered at the slightest display of anything that wasn’t sugar and rainbows. A hint of steel whenever one of her little friends took a knock or two, and even then she had to rely on some weird superpower, but she couldn’t do anything for herself.

This was what Salad was afraid of. The thought brought her blood to boil.

Everything Salad had worked for, learned, accomplished, ripped from the grasp of ponies who said she wasn’t good enough, who said that she couldn’t hope to seriously try for, who called her incomplete. Everything she had become crumbled in front of those eyes.

“A-are you alri-“

“How long as it been?”

“Five… minutes?” Salad almost groaned.

--

It was barely fifteen minutes later before Salad was forced to take the harp from the wheezing Fluttershy.

…It wasn’t actually that heavy at all. How weak was that mare?

“You’ve done this before, yeah? The trip I mean.”

“Yes…”

“Where are we bedding down?”

“U-um…” There was a note of panic in her voice. Salad braced herself for disappointment.

“I, um… hope you don’t mind. But, we’ll be sleeping… outside…”

Turning back and raising an eyebrow would involve facing the pegasus. Salad settled for speaking.

“…that’s it?”

“…yes.”

“Huh. Got me expecting something bad there. I’m used to sleeping outside when I’m between towns. As long as you don’t stop us on an anthill or something, we’re good.”

“M-me?”

“I don’t like it, but I don’t know where we’re going, and I’ve never been to this area before. You’re leading this little expedition. If you don’t screw up, maybe you’ll survive.”

“meep.”

“Oh, right, forgot you’re a coward that can’t detect sarcasm.” Salad was well aware she was being far too blunt for the likes of her travelling partner, but she couldn’t bring herself to care. “This is how I’m wired. Deal with it.”

“…alright.”

Nothing of note was said after that.

--

What to do… what to do…

Celestia was starting to lower the sun, and it would soon be time to stop for dinner. And they had almost arrived at the place Fluttershy and Big Mac had camped last year.

If they stopped, Fluttershy had a chance to maybe do something to lighten Salad up. It was plain to see that the pink mare thought the trip was the worst possible thing.

And Fluttershy was responsible for it. Well no, not really, it’s not as if she made the dreamer get sick, or made herself the most suited pony to the job of healing him, but it was because Fluttershy couldn’t make the trip on her own that she was forced to take along somepony who…

…Fluttershy had never encountered anypony who felt such distaste towards her. It went farther then fear.

What to do… I must do something…

…she enjoyed the pie I made her…

She had said that, hadn’t she? Salad herself was, from what the yellow pegasus had heard (and tasted, the return pie was delicious), a very good chef. So she’d perhaps have a more discerning palette.

Fluttershy wasn’t proud of much… at all. Nearly nothing, really. Though nopony had ever told her that she wasn’t capable in the kitchen.

Would Salad appreciate it if she cooked for her tonight? Since she was bodyguard, it was the least Fluttershy could do. Repayment for possible protection (knock on wood) would work nicely.

“Um-“

“Hey, you want to cook first, or will I?” Salad asked. “We’re stopping soon, right?”

“Well, y-yes, but-“

“Good. I’m hungry. I’ll go first if there’s no objections.”

“I, um… I wouldn’t mind c-“

“Cool. Where are we setting down?”

“…I, um… could cook for both of us?” Salad’s head turned ever so slightly. She still refused to look at her, so Fluttershy imagined this was the closest she would get to eye contact.

“…if that’s alright with you?” Fluttershy added, averting her gaze from Salad’s imaginary judging eyes.

“No, I’m good.” Salad said, facing forward again.

“…are yo-“

“Yeah.”

“…okay.”

--

Now full, Fluttershy had precious little time to think of something different. It wouldn’t be long before they bedded down.

Think think think. What could I do to make sleeping easier?

…A lullaby?

She barely managed to catch herself before she tried asking. That wasn’t a good idea.

…could I make a bed for her somehow? It’d have to be something quick. A lot of small pine boughs would make something soft…

Salad yawned, out of the corner of her eye.

Not fast enough. She’d already be sleeping by the time I got back.

What to do…

The pink mare was already making her way to a nearby tree base.

What to do…!

“Um…!”

“What?”

“…Could I… um…”

“Spit it out. I’m tired.”

…perfect!

“Could I get you a cloud?”

“…why?”

“To sleep on.” Fluttershy clarified. “It would be better than the ground.”

“I’ll be fine.”

“O-oh…” Is she offended? Is it because she’s never slept on a cloud before? Because she can’t fly! Oh you’re terrible Fluttershy, look what you’ve done now-!

“Oh for the moon’s sake…” Salad said, and Fluttershy’s racing mind stopped.

“What-“

“I’m not even looking at you and I can tell you look like a kicked puppy. It’s annoying. Relax.”

Banishing the extremely depressing mental picture of a kicked puppy, Fluttershy wondered if that meant she had been angering Salad the entire trip. She had felt rather sad the whole way, so…

“I’m so-“

“Just stop.” Her wing wasn’t folded anymore, now raised to half-mast. Considering the situation, Fluttershy supposed that meant Salad was agitated.

“I… I can’t help it…” Fluttershy said.

“Why am I not surprised…?” The other mare growled. “I’m going to sleep. If you wake me up, it had better be good.”

“…alright.”

Why… won’t she let me…?

Please let me help…

Please…

Gentle Cure

Chapter Six: Gentle Cure
or
Also Kind Of An Ironic Cure, When You Think About It, I Guess

There was a bird yelling into her ear.

Part of her wondered what would have the bird so panicked. She didn’t think she knew the bird in question, only that it was there, telling her that they were surrounded by-

“Salad!” Fluttershy hissed, now wide awake. Thankfully, the other pegasus was a light sleeper and took note of the panic in her voice.

“What?”

“T-timberwolves!”

“Where?”

“We’re surrounded!”

“The tree!” Salad barked, already jumping.

Fluttershy wasn’t far behind. And perched in safety, they saw the wooden animals crawl from the shadows.

There were at least a dozen, circling the tree.

“…they’re not stupid.” Salad said. “They know I can’t fly. It’s the only reason they’re even trying at this point.”

“…what do we do?”

“Well.” Salad began. “This is why I didn’t take off my bags to sleep.” A second later, Fluttershy saw the glint of something on Salad’s wing.

“W-what-“

“I’d tell you to go on ahead, but the cure and harp are both down there. Can you tell me which one’s the alpha?” Fluttershy didn’t even think about the question, and quickly scanned the pack.

“T-that one.” She said, pointing a shaking hoof at a wolf holding his head a little higher then the rest.

“Turn away, and close your eyes. You don’t want to watch this.” The clearing brightened, and Fluttershy noticed that a cloud had moved away from the moon. Her eyes, barely adjusted to the darkness before, could now see clearly.

Salad had removed her bags and slung them over a branch. And with a bayonet on her wing, she was poised to attack.

She was about to attempt to kill the entire pack.

“Y-you can’t!” Even besides an entire pack of animals getting slaughtered, there were so many things that could go wrong for Salad, it couldn't have been worth the risk.

“You can just fly away from this. I can’t. And timberwolves can wait for days.” Salad said. “This isn’t even about you. It’s them or me.”

“I’ll get a cloud!” Fluttershy stammered. “A-and I can fly you out of here!”

“Bucking moon, we don’t have time for thi-“

“We have days you said.” The vet continued, calming down as the reality dawned on her. They couldn’t be touched up here. The wolves would wait.

“…You’re going to cloud-taxi me out of here?” Salad said in disbelief. “Really?”

“You don’t have to hurt them. Or risk getting hurt or killed. This is the best way.”

“In case you haven’t noticed, there is a pack of wolves down there, and the cure and harp are at the base of the tree we’re trapped in. Are you saying we leave them behind?”

“…I-if… I…” Fluttershy took a deep breath.

…What would Rainbow Dash do?

“You have five seconds to convince me not to go down there and make some kindling.”

“If… if I can scare them… could you get the harp and bags?” Fluttershy asked, looking up at the surly mare.

“…you’re serious.”

“Yes.”

“You couldn’t scare a-“ Salad stopped there, thankfully. Though Fluttershy could feel how ashamed she was of the unintentional admission.

“…I can.” Fluttershy said, keeping an even rhythm of breathing. Her nerves started to calm. “Or… I can at least make a diversion.”

“What are you going to do?” Salad asked. “If you’re going to try something, I might as well sit here and get ready for it.”

“I’m going to get a cloud.” Fluttershy said. “Wait here.”

“…go before I change my mind.” Salad hissed, stowing her blade.

Fluttershy took off from the tree and flew up high.

Happier memories came to mind as a younger Dash flew to her cottage every day she learned something new and tried to teach her ‘how to be a more awesome pegasus’.

Something she had previously thought was scary would possibly save Salad’s life. Or at least keep her from getting injured.

Fluttershy landed on a collection of clouds and got to work.

--

Salad was almost ready to get her blade out again. Staring at the alpha for the better part of a couple hours had got her more than ready for action.

All she had to do was land one good blow out of the tree. With the alpha dead, the others would be shocked and brainless. Disorganised. And while she’d still be surrounded with ravenous wolves, she’d already be starting on thinning the ranks. And maybe work on intimidating the rest once she was covered in wolf blood.

It wasn’t the perfect plan, but she didn’t see any better options available. Once Fluttershy tried her hoof at scaring a group of vicious predators, hopefully she’d realize that Salad knew what she was doing and would just let her get on with it.

“I’m… I’m back.”

“Bucking finally, what took you so lo-… whoa.”

Fluttershy was perched on a thunderhead roughly the size of a small house.

There was also a smaller white cloud nearby. Salad presumed it was for her.

“…alright.” Salad said. “I admit this is a good plan. But that’s too much.”

“Um… what?”

“Look at that thing. Just… just look at it. That’s like trying to skip stones with a boulder.”

“O-oh. Um…”

“Can you break it up? Something smaller? Even I know controlling lightning is hard work. If you buck that thing, you might end up hitting me or our stuff.”

“…I, um… I don’t think…”

“…Alright, look. Just, fly it out over there. A good distance away.” Salad said, exasperated. “Give it a few bucks. I’ll get the bags and harp, and sit on that other cloud over there. Then we can get out of here like a couple of tree hugging pacifists.”

“…okay.” Fluttershy said, looking unsure of herself. The imposing stormcloud drifted over, a decent distance away.

For the most part, the wolves ignored her. Salad was the only meal they were sure to get, so it was natural.

Salad secured her bags and got ready.

The first cracking discharge was like a starting pistol, Salad thought as she dove from her branch.

Fluttershy couldn’t have aimed the bolt, the shot was so perfect. It arced and struck right between the alpha and another wolf, and suddenly the entire pack was in a panic.

Salad nearly groaned when she heard the other pegasus apologising for the near hit. Though the shot was perfect, even if unintentional. The harp was slung over her back, and she had just enough precious seconds to grab Fluttershy’s bags in her teeth and jump before the jaws of a nearby wolf snapped at her.

The weight made the jump awkward, but she landed neatly on the cloud.

Fluttershy tentatively approached, fidgeting with her hooves. Salad slammed her eyes shut and tried to offer the bags. She had been forced to keep holding them in her mouth since she couldn’t set them down on the cloud.

With yet another apology, Salad had her speaking privileges back as Fluttershy secured the bags to her back.

“…So.” Salad started, eyes still closed.

“…um… yes?”

“Why are we still above the angry snarling pack of timberwolves?”

“…good point.” Fluttershy said, and she took a minute to get her bearings.

And then she started pushing the cloud towards their destination.

--

Fluttershy was… actually a little proud of herself. The plan she had come up with worked. Nopony got hurt! (well those wolves almost did, and Salad almost took a wound or two when she grabbed the things but…)

Over the horizon, the tell-tale signs of impending sunrise were making themselves known. And she was now aware how much sleep the ordeal had made them lose.

She chanced a look over at the top of the cloud to see if Salad was grumpy (or more grumpy than usual) but instead found her snoozing. She had evidently fallen asleep during the ride.

Fluttershy found herself studying the mare for the first time. She hadn’t looked directly at her since the one day she had first tried the Stare.

Salad was resting on her back, harp clutched to her chest. Something Fluttershy was thankful for, since the harp, special though it was, would’ve fallen like a stone out of the cloud. And though they weren’t very high off the ground, twenty feet at most, Fluttershy wasn’t keen on finding out just how durable magical artefacts were.

Even at rest, Salad’s face seemed locked in a scowl. Fluttershy thought back to something her grandmother had said about how sad and angry little fillies that didn’t know how to cheer up would look like that their entire lives.

Of course, her grandmother had been joking, and had normally tickled her to get her laughing again. It was something that happened often whenever her mother had… disciplined her.

She shook the morbid thoughts from her head, instead turning them back to the sleeping mare.

Her side was covered in ugly scars. Fluttershy knew this already, but from what she had heard, Salad responded with threats at best whenever anypony took too long looking at it.

She wondered when it had happened. Rarity let slip once that she knew the circumstances behind whatever had claimed the angry mare’s wing, but hadn’t elaborated. And if Rarity wasn’t willing to talk about it, it was normally something serious.

Fluttershy looked again at the harp, wrapped in black cloth. And pondered something.

When Celestia had presented the harp to her, and talked about the magics it possessed, she had mentioned it was once used to help heal minds.

Given the creature it called, Fluttershy could believe this. The sound of it when Celestia had first played it for her evoked feelings of security. She had felt as if she were resting at home, in bed.

Salad wasn’t insane. But Fluttershy was sure there was pain that could be eased.

…she wondered if a lullaby would be appropriate if Salad was already asleep.

…I want to help her. Even if it’s something as small as this.

Salad wasn’t holding the harp very tightly. And by some miracle, she didn’t wake up when Fluttershy gently took it from her sleeping grasp.

The cloth fell away, revealing the polished golden hue of the wood. And Fluttershy managed to get comfortable on another cloud she had grabbed, positioning the harp so the weight didn’t bother her.

The first few notes were like greeting a friend. And Fluttershy smiled as she picked a song and began her experiment.

She played as softly as she could, but there wasn’t any doubt the music reached Salad’s ears.

Her face lost the minute tension that Fluttershy hadn’t even noticed until it was gone.

A breathy sigh as Salad turned on her side and made herself comfortable.

…the revelation that Salad’s guard was down almost made Fluttershy stop playing entirely. The song continued as the mare stared transfixed at the sight.

This wasn’t something she had the right to see, but she couldn’t look away. She wanted to see this side of a mare who had only ever looked on her with dislike.

I can help you. I’ve found a way.

Was it a paradox? To want to help a pony so badly it became selfish? Salad had made it clear she wanted nothing to do with her.

I will not let this be.

Regardless of the reason, Fluttershy had harmed her. She had done something on a level that she could only guess at.

…but she knew, oh did she know, what that fear felt like.

And now, even if Salad wasn’t here for her sake, she was looking after Fluttershys well being. Big Mac had said the thing that had convinced her was that there was a life at stake. Salad was here because she believed it was right.

You deserve this.

There was a good pony underneath the sarcasm, glares, insults, and hate.

“A pinch of kindness, dear, is sometimes all that’s needed. Sometimes more than a pinch, but I digress.”

Her kindly grandmother’s life lessons came back to her, and with them, a bit of hope.

“If there is even the barest possibility that it will work, than it eventually will. Time and patience, and it will all be worth it in the end. And you’ll see that kindness returned.”

Fluttershy idly wondered, as her spirits started to lift, if she would ever see that face of Salad’s when she was awake.

--

Salad slowly woke, though it took her a little while to realize she had.

She had dreamt of formless contentedness, and she lay baffled as to where it came from and what it meant.

One of the reasons she wasn’t sure she was quite awake was the fact that she still felt the sensation of idle soft drifting.

She remembered that, yes, she had eyes, and opened them.

She was still in the cloud, and another had been placed above her to shield her from the sun.

Fluttershy, Salad thought. And then she realized that the mare in question wasn’t anywhere to be found.

…a slight humming met her ears. A tune that rung a bell in her head, but she couldn’t place it.

Fluttershy was below, and Salad could hear the sizzling of a skillet. Peering over the side of the cloud, she saw the other pegasus next to a fire, cooking up an omelet and a few strips of hay bacon.

A glance to the sky said the time was about ten o’clock.

A bit late for breakfast…

Salad noticed she was still wearing her bags. They were a little damp from sleeping in the cloud, but her bags were waterproof anyway. The harp was down with Fluttershy. Everything accounted for, Salad leapt from her bed.

Fluttershy jumped at Salad’s sudden appearance, but managed to keep the food from falling or burning.

“Good morning.”

“Or what’s left of it. We lost a lot of time, why didn’t you wake me?”

“Oh, um… we actually covered a lot of ground.”

“…huh?” Salad asked as she gave the area a once over.

“I made sure we were far away from the timberwolves before I stopped pushing your cloud.” The mare explained. “So we’re still on schedule. Could you please get a plate? This is just about finished…”

“It’s your food. Get it yourself.”

“U-um…”

“What?” said Salad as she brushed the droplets of water off of her bags.

“It’s your food, actually…”

“…what?”

“I’ve already eaten.” Said Fluttershy, timidly. “And I-I thought that if I had breakfast ready for you when you got up… we could start moving again sooner? If that’s alright with you, of course…”

“You made me a full breakfast because you’re impatient?”

“You… don’t really seem to like it when I’m nice.” The vet replied, growing quiet. “So I thought… if I were practical…”

Salad blinked.

“…still no?”

“…fine.” The pink mare sighed in defeat, flipping open one of her bags and fishing out a plate. The eggs and bacon smelled like just what the doctor (Oh ha ha, brain, nice one) ordered, and Salad had to really try and be nonchalant about digging into it.

…why does this have to taste so good?

She could hear cheer in the way Fluttershy hummed and busied herself in cleaning up, and wondered just what put the mare in such a good mood.

Not that Salad actively wished misery on her or anything, but her prancing around with a pep in her step would make it that much harder to pretend she didn’t exist.

“Did you sleep well?” Fluttershy asked while she was packing up.

“No more than usual.” A lie. Salad had never slept better in her life.

“Hmm.” Fluttershy somehow knew that was a lie. Could the witch read minds now? “I hoped last night wouldn’t make it too hard to sleep.” And now it was ambiguous. Was the yelllow mare playing games with her?

“I’ve had worse then a pack of wolves.” Salad said, hoping the other pegasus would just shut up.

“Oh?”

“Yeah.” Fine, she would shut up. Conversations couldn’t happen with one pony.

…well they could, but they normally weren’t good signs. Salad remembered this one pink earth pony from town that seemed to do it from time to time. Something about that one was unsettling. Salad took special care to avoid her.

With Salad refusing to elaborate, the conversation ended. And Fluttershy re-wrapped the harp (when had it been unwrapped?) and slung it to her back.

Checking a map and nodding to herself, Fluttershy turned back to her.

“Ready?”

“Yeah.” Salad replied.

--

It was around two when Fluttershy mentioned lunch. The demure mare had offered grilled cheese sandwiches, and by the look of them, they were made relatively recently.

“…when did you make these?” Salad found herself asking.

“Before I started on your breakfast.”

“…I’ve got apples.”

“I made too much for me.”

“…you didn’t sleep, did you?” While Fluttershy was in high spirits, she was obviously tired. It made sense.

“Um…”

“So what, you were scared of getting attacked again, so you just stayed up and cooked? What else did you do?”

“I… might’ve practised for a while…” Fluttershy admitted, nodding to the harp now leaning against a tree.

“…for that long?”

“I like playing it.” It would explain why the harp had been unwrapped when Salad awoke. Hay, if she liked playing it that much, maybe it was why she was in such an insufferably good mood so far.

Weird mare.

Salad reluctantly accepted a sandwich, if only so it wouldn’t go to waste. She could just snack on the apples later. Now if only the mare wouldn’t look so blighted happy about it all…

…oh buck me. I’m making her think this is working.

Fluttershy accidentally put her to bed in a cloud, and then spent her own sleeping time making food for her, and…

…and she was trying to friendship her.

Salad was already halfway through the (buck, still delicious) sandwich, and the revelation almost made her drop the thing.

Alright… options.

Salad did not want this. Just up and shattering all the mare’s presumed aspirations though would make her super sad or something though, and that’d make Red mad.

She could just… not accept any more attempts? Though…

The mare was being crafty about it now. Practical. ‘I made food so you might as well take it instead of wasting time making more’. Well, that was a paraphrase, but…

And Salad didn’t have any reasons to just say no aside from ‘Buck you and everything you stand for’ and that just wasn’t good enough. Especially not now that she was forced to not-turn-her-back-and-jump-for-greener-pastures.

…the only option really open was to just grit her teeth and endure it until the end. Then avoid the mare like the plague to cement the message. So, basically, her original plan from the beginning.

Red couldn’t be mad at her for that. Ivan probably wouldn’t have any problems either. And that was pretty much all her concerns addressed right there.

She’d pass the time thinking up counters to anything the mare tried on her. Even if she couldn’t outright win, she could still put up a fight.

--

Salad had managed to make dinner for herself by insisting she cook first and suddenly become too busy and involved to really pay attention to Fluttershy’s protests.

So Fluttershy took off to find a nice fluffy cloud to offer, since she thought it might be harder for Salad to say no if it was already in front of her.

By the time Fluttershy had returned though, Salad was already settled underneath the tree and getting ready to go to sleep. Somehow, the meal and cleanup had been wrapped up in the short span of time the flight had taken.

Salad, already settled, mentioned she preferred the ground. And Fluttershy knew that was a lie, but calling her out on it would be rude.

The surly pegasus was trying everything to resist Fluttershy’s attempts to make nice, but the vet knew there was one thing she couldn’t refuse.

By the time she had finished cleaning up after her meal, Salad was already sleeping. And though Fluttershy was very tired from the meagre amount of sleep she had gotten the previous night, having flew them onward, played the harp, and cooked the rest, this was a chance she couldn’t ignore. Just ten minutes or so wouldn't hurt matters.

She was about to start the song when a muffled groan caught her attention.

--

“Goodness, look at you.” The voice jeered, and Salad could see a thin disturbing grin in the darkness. “All caught up with nowhere to go.”

She wanted to leave, but couldn’t. One of her wings was a chain, attached to the ground. She couldn’t fly or run.

“It’s not so bad only having one, right? It’s a pegasus’ worst nightmare to lose a wing. But now that you have, what’s left to be afraid of?”

The voice wasn’t adjusting in volume, and the grin hadn’t moved. But something inside said she needed to go. Danger was getting closer.

“Can’t you think of anything?”

A pair of eyes opened above the unflappable smile, and suddenly Salad could barely think of anything at all.

“Maybe there’s nothing. Even if you’re not really a pegasus anymore, you no longer have anything to be afraid of. Isn’t that amazing? I envy you.”

She couldn’t even tell what was happening anymore. She felt cold. The chain was still there, secure, even though the idea of running away seemed impossible.

“What do you have left?” The voice asked, and Salad felt breath tickle her ear. “You can still run. Would you be afraid of losing that?” Something sharp she couldn’t see pressed against one of her forelegs.

Whatever spell was cast on her let her retain enough awareness to scream when the blade began to draw itself back and forth.

“Soon you’ll be without that fear.”

She struggled, she couldn’t do much else, but she still felt herself unable to break contact with those maddening eyes.

“Would you be afraid to lose your voice?” A few sharp points started dancing around her throat. “You probably didn’t give much thought to foals, but I hear most mares don’t like the idea of losing that choice.” Something wet trickled down one of her hind legs when something jagged bit into her abdomen.

“You spent years looking for him. Would you be afraid if he died?” Between one scream and another came a third that wasn’t hers.

“Oh you’re going to love it when I’m done. So many-“

Salad was left a shattered mess on the ground as the voice died away, and it took her a moment to realise she was whole (or as whole as she normally was) as she attempted to pull herself together.

Soft music found her as the edges of her vision softened and the cold faded. Tension vanished and she fell forward into nothing, cradled by the dulcet notes of a harp.

She reached with her hooves, trying to return the embrace she felt, but nopony was there.

Strange. Who was holding her?

--

She wondered when their roles had reversed. Once Salad was asleep, Fluttershy took up vigil at her side to protect her from the nightmare.

It felt… empowering, being able to protect somepony. Did Rainbow feel this way? She hoped so. Seeing Salad relax and stop that cringing and whimpering was just… great really. Spectacular even.

…unfortunately, Fluttershy didn’t know how long she’d have to play the harp for to make sure the nightmare didn’t come back. Could they come back?

It was fine, she supposed. She could go without sleep.

She wondered what she should make for breakfast tomorrow. Salad wouldn’t be in a position to refuse, after all.

From Beyond

Chapter Seven: From Beyond
or
Bricks In Your Pants When You Click The Song Link

Again, Salad awoke refreshed, in a good mood, and in the shade.

Her mood wavered when she remembered who she was still with.

…come to think of it, where was the witch?

“Good morning!” Called Fluttershy, and Salad was for once glad she refrained from eye contact for reasons other than the magic stare.

Her plumage was frayed, her hair was unkempt, she shook at odd times…

It probably wasn’t a good thing for her to be hovering near a fire in her condition.

“Bucking hay, you pulled another all nighter again, didn’t you?”

“…maybe?”

“Close your eyes.” Salad growled. “And don’t open them until I tell you, or I’ll feed you your teeth.”

Trembling, the mare obeyed, and Salad busied herself with studying her face.

Dark circles. They had only had an hour or two when the wolves attacked, and they had left at dawn that day. She had three hours at the very most and she was on her third day.

Moreover, the first night she had spent most of her time pushing Salad around on a cloud, flying nonstop.

“What did you do last night?”

“…harp.”

“That’s it?”

“Y-Yes.”

The previous night hadn’t been strenuous at least, but the fact still remained the vet was due for a crash.

“You’re a bucking idiot.”

“…p-pardon?” And now that she actually had her eyes closed, she was fighting the urge to nod off.

“I can tell by looking at you. You don’t do this normally. What’s wrong with you?”

“Nothing!”

“Is it me? Are you staying up because of me?”

“N-no!”

“I’m supposed to be looking after you, and you’ve gone and made yourself walking dead. And now we have to make the last legs of a journey and, if what Red told me was right, climb a bucking mountain!”

“C-can I open my eyes please?”

“What?”

“B-breakfast’s burning…” Salad raised an eyebrow and looked over to the fire. The skillet was crammed full.

“…you made enough for two.”

“S-sorry?”

“…Right, you can’t take care of yourself. I’m calling the shots from here on in. After we’re done with that…” Salad said, pointing at the cooking food, “…then you’re giving me the map, and I’m getting us through this before you kill yourself.”

“U-um-“

“I’m not looking, open your eyes and do what you gotta do.”

“…alright.”

And while she was tending to that, Salad rummaged through her things.

She pulled out a length of rope, and set it down with her bags. Then she jumped into the still present cloud and lounged for a little while.

Considering what was ahead, she’d indulge.

--

Fluttershy’s thoughts came slowly. She had never been in a state like this before.

Once or twice she was too scared to go to sleep, but that wouldn’t remain for long.

Working through two nights though…

She didn’t regret it a bit. Even if Salad was unaware, she wasn’t. She’d do it again in a second.

Now all she had to do was… right, climb a mountain.

That’d be… easy…

A hoof lightly slapped the side of her face.

“Falling asleep in front of a fire is dumb, even for you.” Salad said. “Come on now.”

“Thank you.” Fluttershy said, and she meant it. That was almost a disaster.

“Don’t do it again.”

“…could you please get a pla-“

“Here. Hurry up before you keel over.” Salad said, taking a plate in her teeth and holding it at the ready.

Fluttershy didn’t ‘keel over’ during breakfast. Whatever keeling over was it sounded bad.

…though she didn’t feel very good, so maybe it was a concern.

“Done? Good. Let’s get this cleaned up.” With Salad’s help, soon everything was clean and packed away, and Fluttershy was awaiting orders. Thinking was kind of hard at the moment, so orders were actually a little welcome.

“Alright, bring out the map and show me where we are and where we’re going.”

She had made sure to keep special track of the locations, and Salad nodded as she stowed the map in her own bags.

She told Fluttershy to close her eyes, and the yellow mare felt something wrap around her saddlebag strap.

When she opened her eyes again (which was getting harder and harder by the minute), she noticed the thing was a rope. The other end was in Salad’s teeth, and it almost felt like she was on a leash.

“A’ight. Go shleep in ‘a cloud.” She said around the rope.

“B-but-“ Salad spat out her end, probably for easier speaking.

“You go sleep in the cloud, and you’ll weigh like, nothing. I know where we’re going, so I’ll just tow you.”

“A-are you-“

“Yes I’m sure, now get in the bucking cloud before I throw you in.”

“O-oh…” Fluttershy said as she ducked her head and made her way to her new bed. “T-thank you.”

“You had better be thankful.” Salad muttered.

Fluttershy was only sad for a moment before she settled, and then the feeling of ‘oh Celestia I can sleep now and it’s going to be totally awesome’ overtook her entire system.

Rainbow Dash told her about this feeling before, and as her consciousness quickly faded, she could see what all the fuss was about.

--

Salad watched out of the corner of her eye as Fluttershy hopped into the cloud, snuggled into the fluff, murmured something intelligible, and fell asleep.

Mere seconds and she was already sleeping like a foal. Just as adorably too, a traitorous part of her suggested.

Just let me bucking hate you already. Salad made a frustrated grunt, more to herself than anything. You could at least snore or something.

But no, ever since the trip started, aside from the sleep thing, Fluttershy had been… Salad wouldn’t say perfect, but…

She was co-operative, constantly trying to help (even if it was unwelcome, the thought counted for something against Salad’s will), cooked awesome, was mindful of Salad’s desire to avoid her eyes…

If only Salad didn’t hate her guts, she’d be a fantastic example of eye candy to top it all off. Seriously, the doormat could be a bucking model or something.

…As Salad pulled the dead weight along, she found herself thinking of things that could’ve been.

Her first impression of the pegasus was an idiot who overreacted and responded to her problems by sticking her head in the sand until they stopped being problems.

Then the pegasus showed her the meaning of fear. That was among the most unexpected things that had ever happened in her life.

…and then Salad beat up a grizzly bear, and the mare had patched her up. Upon retrospect, Salad decided the reason she had managed to not bolt out of the chair and for the hills with Fluttershy so close might’ve had something to do with the blood loss. And even if the witch was mad at her for what happened, she did it anyway because Salad needed it done.

…if she had more time to think on it after that, instead of being thrust into a random quest so quickly…

Moreover, what might’ve happened if Salad had gotten a better impression of the mare to start?

Dangerous thinking. It’s better this way. You know what she can do.

Red said she was on the level. So did Ivan. Salad trusted them both.

…so… Fluttershy was probably on the level.

She could end you.

So could Ivan. If he attacked her, she wouldn’t be able to fight back. She’d probably just let it happen.

You wouldn’t even have the choice with her.

Salad knew at the back of her head that Fluttershy was good, and that Red and Ivan were telling the truth, and that this entire time she had been spurning the honest efforts of a kind and pure hearted mare who was earnestly trying to make up for a mistake she made. Were it not for Salad's pride, fear, and annoyance at Fluttershy's constant pressing...

…Salad could probably just forgive her then. Just, take a leap of faith, look her in the eye, say it wasn’t a big deal, and then it could all stop. Fluttershy would just go back to doing whatever she did, and Salad wouldn’t have to deal with her anymore. Red said she was safe. It’d be fine.

It can’t be that easy.

So, when Fluttershy woke up, Salad could forgive her, and then all the spontaneous good deeds could stop and she’d go back to being like everypony else.

Once guilt was out of the way, she’d go back to maybe using her for a conversation or two, and dancing around the issue of where her wing went. Irritating, but something Salad knew how to deal with.

…if the wimp knew Ivan took it, she’d probably faint.

…maybe she wouldn’t change? Another part of her piped up. Something hopeful. Salad frowned. She thought she had stopped hoping for things a long time ago.

She had dealt with ponies like Fluttershy before. Wastes of thought that couldn’t stand the very idea of anypony having a problem with them.

She lost two days of sleep. Think back to how she acted. Maybe she’s actually this nice?

Salad snorted. Nopony was that nice. Period.

Ivan and Red are. They said she is too. You trust them.

She was thinking in circles. She’d come back to that later.

She’d have plenty of time on the return trip.

--

The rest of the journey was uneventful. Salad found herself stepping onto the road leading up the mountain, found she made a wrong turn, and started back. Once she got back to Ponyville, she could sort through this mes-

…hold the phone.

Salad turned back to the mountain.

I’ve still got business on that thing. Eye on the prize.

She stepped on the road leading up the mountain and realised she left something back with Ivan that she needed, so she started back an-

What the buck?

She stepped on the road leading up the mountain and decided that this was a beautiful place to live and that she should build a-

Alright, no.

She stepped on the road leading up the mountain and it dawned on her that playing the harp was awesome and she had a harp like, right there on her back, so she should dedicate a few years to just sitting there and-

Huh. Wonder what I’ll get this time?

She stepped on the road leading up the mountain and she remembered that there was a very hot pegasus sleeping in a cloud behind her, and if she got in the cloud that was just big enough for two, she could probably start slow and Fluttershy would probably be too shocked and half asleep to say no so-

…I’ve got one hoof already in the cloud. That was close.

Salad decided tempting fate for fun was a bad idea from that point on, sat herself down a good distance from the slumbering Fluttershy, and tried to figure out what was wrong.

So, probably magic or something. What to do?

Salad hesitated, and tried stepping onto the mountain just a little to the left of the road and wondered what it would be like to have foals and decided to jump the next stallion she ca-

Whoa! Calm down mountain! Just checking! Geeze!

…She decided that hilarity would ensue if she kept trying to get onto the mountain. Hilarity for everypony but her.

And since buck everypony but her, Salad trotted over to the cloud to wake Fluttershy. Salad had hoped to keep her unconscious until the very last minute, but whatever spell the mountain had on it was getting an attitude.

It had been a good nine hours anyway.

“…mmmm, Macintosh…”

Salad recoiled and stared in disbelief.

…on one hand, I could see if she says anything else and have a load of fun at Red’s expense. On the other, I could wake her up and get this over with.

Ah, decisions…

“Wake up.” Salad said, shaking Fluttershy awake.

“…um… Salad?”

“Dream about Red later, we’ve got a problem.”

“H-how did yo-“

“Because I’m spectacular. Now this mountain’s got some kind of spell on it. Explain.”

“Um…” The pegasus took a few moments to shake the sleep from her head. “…oh.”

“Well?”

“You haven’t been invited.” Fluttershy said. “So the mountain won’t let you in.”

“I don’t suppose your reservation has a ‘plus one’ I can take? Or should I wait here?”

“N-no, you should come! Just… touch me while we step onto the road.” Fluttershy said, eyes downcast. “O-once you’re over the line…”

“Fine.” Salad sighed, quashing her suspicion at the mare's insistence as she dispersed the cloud with a kick. “Come on.”

All Salad had to do was rest a hoof on Fluttershy’s wither and hobble forward a few steps.

Fluttershy looked up for a moment.

“We made good time.” She said.

“I want this over with as soon as possible.” Salad replied.

“Well… we’re almost there now.”

“Still have the trip back. So, what’s this god thing about?”

“I’m sorry?”

“What is it? What’s it look like, what’s it do… that sort of thing.”

“Well… he protects dreams.”

“…he protects dreams.” Salad repeated, eyebrow firmly raised. “There’s a god for that?”

“There are monsters that can attack ponies while they sleep.” Fluttershy explained as they walked. Salad noticed that it was starting to get hard to focus on their surroundings, but the other pegasus didn’t seem alarmed.

If Fluttershy wasn’t scared, it was probably pretty tame.

“No joke?”

“He prevents them from doing so. Before he was awakened, those demons could appear and possess or poison the mind. While he exists, our dreams are safe.”

“Huh. Who told you that?”

“…P-Princess Celestia…”

“I should’ve known that, really.” The edges of her vision were blurring a bit. The colouring seemed just a bit off.

“Oh?”

“Red told me things. Nightmare Moon, writing letters, that she’s the one who asked you to do this, all that good stuff.”

“O-oh…” Fluttershy was embarrassed of that?

“What?”

“S-so… you know about…”

“… the Element of Kindness? Is that what you’re getting at?”

“Y-yes.”

“Well yeah. What about it?”

“If you… if you know…”

“If you’ve got something to say, just say it. Beating around the bush like that frosts my cookies.”

“…is th-“

“That’s bad.”

“Well… w-why would you be…” Fluttershy couldn’t finish. At that point though, she didn’t really need to.

“…I just am.” Salad said. “You will never have any idea just how much I hate that I feel this way.”

“…but…”

“I’m here because there’s no other option. You know that.” The scarred mare stated. “Besides that though, Red and Ivan say you’re not going to kill me. I’m having trouble really taking that, but I trust them.”

“…I… don’t like that you feel that way either.”

“I’m sure.” Said Salad. “You can’t be liked by everypony.”

“That’s not it.”

“…Well then what is it?”

“…I’m scared of them too.” Salad, before she could stop herself, whipped her gaze over to the other mare.

Fluttershy had stopped, and couldn’t bring her eyes up to meet hers.

At the back of her mind, Salad was aware they had reached the summit, but the issue as to how they scaled a mountain so fast could wait.

“You’re having me on. Wha-“

“Please.” The mare asked. “I… please let me tell you. Please don’t interrupt me. I won’t ask you for anything after this.”

“…Why?”

“I-I want… Sorry isn’t enough for this.” Tears wet the ground at Fluttershy’s feet, but weren’t visible for long.

It had started to rain.

“…I’ll listen.”

“Thank you.”

--

“Mommy!” Shouted a little yellow filly as she flung open the front door. “Sticks and Stones won’t stop pulling my hair!”

“…And?” Asked the mare from her seat.

“A-and…” Honestly, little Fluttershy hadn’t thought that far. “The… the teacher said…”

“Are you in trouble?”

“No!” The filly shouted, stamping her hoof in indignation. “No I’m not!”

“You’re being loud again.” Fluttershy’s eyes widened in panic.

“N-no, I’m sorry!” she cried. “It just makes me so mad! I’m-!”

“What did I tell you about shouting at me?”

“P-please, I-!” She knew if she didn’t lower her voice, it’d be bad, but she couldn’t calm down.

The teacher said she had to tell her mom to go talk to the parents of those bullies, and Fluttershy was trying to do just that, so why-!

“Fluttershy, you aren’t doing what I told you.” Her mother’s eyes locked on hers and Fluttershy found it impossible to look anywhere else.

Her mouth opened and closed, trying to form words and ask her mother to stop, but it was hard to even breathe.

“If they’re pulling your hair, then you must have done something to make them not like you.” Her mother said. “Just like what I’m doing to you now. You only have yourself to blame.”

Fluttershy was sure she hadn’t done anything to them, but her teacher always said that her mother knew what was best for her.

And if Fluttershy disagreed, she’d get the stare again…

“Are you this loud in class?”

She couldn’t answer.

“The nail that sticks up gets hammered down. You’re making yourself noticeable and they don’t like you for it.”

“I-“

“Do not talk back to me.”

The filly cowered, trapped.

“We’re going to practice being likeable. Once I stop, you’re going to make sure I don’t even notice you until tomorrow. You’ll do your chores quietly, complete your homework, go to bed on time, and I won’t have to tell you to do any of it. And I won’t hear a peep out of you. I don’t even want to see you if you can help it. Am I clear?”

Fluttershy barely managed to nod.

“Good.” Her mother said, turning her eyes aside. “You’ll thank me for this one day.”

She was gone before her mother finished talking.

--

“…I found out I could do it too, one day.” Fluttershy said. “The day I met Mr. Grizzles, he was about to hurt a little white baby bunny by accident. So, I stopped him.

“…he… he told me later that… it was alright.” The mare’s voice started to quiver. “T-that… that I wasn’t like… her…

“A-and, and that little bunny… h-he followed me home, and… I thought… it could be…”

“You thought it could be good?” Salad finished. Fluttershy nodded.

“M-my little Angel… he’s… he’s difficult, sometimes, but… but I love him so much, and… if I didn’t… he wouldn’t…”

“…You’re not perfect.” Salad said. “You’re… you’re kind, thoughtful, you care.”

“I-“

“I believe you now. You care. You don’t… you don’t know…” The scarred mare shook her head. “Just… just look at me.”

“But-“

“I’m not asking.”

Salad watched the mare hesitate, but waited patiently for her to lift her head.

Honest blue eyes met hers as she walked forward.

“You’re… wishy washy. It’s a stupid way to say it, but I can’t come up with a smarter way right now.” Salad said, stopping a few feet from the mare. “Like before, when a problem pops up, you panic and hide until it goes away or until you can’t put it off anymore.”

“I’m sorr-“

“And you can’t do anything for yourself.” Salad continued. “I heard you couldn’t even leave the cottage until you found out I had messed up your friend. You left for her.”

“Wha-“

“You’re an indecisive timid cowardly little pile of… something.” Fluttershy’s eyes closed as she started to cry harder. Salad drew a breath before continuing.

“Looking at you now, I don’t even remember what I was afraid of.”

“…w-wha, S-Sal-“

“You aren’t perfect.” Salad repeated, still watching when Fluttershy opened her eyes again. “You thought I came out of nowhere and bruised and cut up your friend for no reason other than I’m a horrible pony. So you swooped in and wanted to make sure I never did anything like that ever again. You didn’t think about it, but you wanted me scared. You made a mistake. There were consequences.”

“I’m… I’m so sorry, please-“

“I’m not afraid anymore.” Salad said. “So we’re done with that.”

“I don’t…”

“We’re cool. So… let’s forget it happened.” Salad said. “I’m making eye contact and everything. It’s fine.”

“A-are you sure?”

“I’ve forgiven worse.” Salad said, shrugging a load off her back. “Need a minute?”

“N-no. I’m f-fine.”

“Take a minute anyway. I’m not in any hurry.” Salad settled against a boulder, taking her bags off for the first time in days.

“Nothing’ll attack us up here, right? I don’t need to keep my bags ready?”

“No…” Fluttershy said, sniffing. “T-this is a sanctuary.”

“Is that why everything’s all weird here?”

“S-sanctuaries are different for, for whatever they belong to…” The mare said, as she started to calm down. “This is a place for dreams.”

“So that’s why everything around here’s all like… wavy and stuff.”

“I guess…”

“…Alright, you’ve had a minute.” Salad said, getting up again. “Here, have a harp. Let’s get this done.”

“Alright…”

The rain seemed to fall harder, and Salad felt herself getting soaked in it, but it was warm in a way that made it feel as if it almost wasn’t even there.

She wondered how well Fluttershy could play the thing, as she set herself up to begin.

The song Fluttershy played was new to her, but the feeling Salad felt when she heard the mare play was unmistakable.

The rain didn’t slacken at all as the clouds parted and the sun shone through in patches.

I felt this. When I was sleeping.

A shape descended from above, and the sky changed to a zebra like pattern of day and night around the clouds.

And… I had a nightmare. But it stopped. It stopped when I heard this harp. Because I heard it.

“Hello, Windfish.” Fluttershy greeted as she trotted forward. A bottle of something was pulled from her saddlebags.

And she… she stayed up. All night. Playing the harp she said. Even while I was…

The supposed god was a giant whale. It returned Fluttershy’s greeting with a warbling cry of it’s own. It seemed pleased.

I called her names, right after I woke up to steaming breakfast and an exausted mare who spent the entire night making sure…

Salad could do nothing but stare dumbly at the scene in front of her. More accurately at the most unselfish pony she had ever met.

The whale turned on it’s side and Fluttershy flitted to the top, and carefully poured the bottle’s contents into the god’s eye.

They chatted while this was going on. And when the deed was done, Fluttershy returned to the ground and continued talking about this and that.

It took Salad a moment to realise she was being waved over.

Salad, still in a state of mild shock, obeyed and walked forward until she was standing next to the pegasus, just a foot or so from the god.

Fluttershy took one of Salad’s forehooves and pressed it against the Windfish’s side.

Salad felt the god idly peruse her mind, but he refrained from touching or looking at anything the mare would deem personal. Weird that she could tell. Even weirder that he could tell.

…It almost felt like Salad was introducing herself as she let it happen.

Another soft sound from the whale, one that seemed to go right through her.

Pleased to meet you.

“…Likewise.” Salad replied, barely above a whisper, as the mountain around them started to crumble.

At some point, they both had ended up on the god’s back, and Fluttershy was laughing, loud and happily, like Scootaloo once did when Ivan had took off at a run with the filly on his back.

All Salad could bring herself to do was watch the lights and stars and planets fly by in the slowest blur she had ever seen.

The display was beyond her imagination.

--

Her eyes opened and she found herself curled up at the base of the mountain.

…a dream?

…Appropriate, she figured. Given the circumstances.

Fluttershy hummed as she got to her hooves, and she looked totally rejuvenated.

“I didn’t think he’d be so happy to see me.” The pegasus said with a smile. “It feels… nice.”

“Hey.” Salad said, catching the other mare’s attention.

“Yes?”

“…what does that harp do?” the scarred pony asked. “Don’t lie to me now.”

Fluttershy looked a little like she had just been backed into a corner.

“…It… The Surf Harp can… influence sleep and dreams.” Fluttershy said. “I, um… when I found you had fallen asleep in the cloud, I wanted… to see if it would… work.”

“…and?”

“You looked… well, relaxed. And you looked good when you woke up, too.”

“And last night?”

“I was going to play for you again, but then you… were having a nightmare so, so I…”

“…I’m sorry.” Salad said, looking into the mare’s eyes. “Thank you.”

“…What are friends for?” Fluttershy asked, as her smile returned at double the volume.

Reunion

Chapter Eight: Reunion
or
It's Always Blowing In The Wind. At All Times.

The trip back to Ponyville had been uneventful, and Salad was thankful.

For some reason, she suddenly cared about whether or not she might have to kill something in front of the squeamish mare she travelled with.

A few days after the Windfish, Fluttershy came within a mile of her cottage and was immediately picked up by a bear, several dear, and a monkey, and quickly carried back towards her home.

Salad watched her go while Fluttershy tried to bid her good day and thank her amidst giggling and happily assuring each animal following and carrying her that yes, she did miss them just as much as they missed her.

Angel stood nearby, glaring at the pink mare.

“She’s fine. Hey, can you get somepony to take this?” Salad said, shrugging the harp off of her back.

Angel waved an arm at a nearby bush, and an armadillo of all things came lumbering out and waited expectantly at her hooves.

Salad shrugged and positioned the wrapped harp on it’s back, before nodding towards it and the bunny.

She set off towards the farm.

--

Big Mac noticed the scarred mare’s approach. And soon after, he noticed a few more things.

Things like how the mare still wore bags, meaning she probably hadn’t settled at home before coming to visit. Something that brought a smile to his face.

One other thing he noticed was her attitude. Gone was the tense air around her, the narrowed eyes and tightened jaw that suggested she was coming over to get away from the town and it’s inhabitants in general.

She didn’t look happy persay, more neutral than anything. Aside from giving her a slight resemblance to her more stoic brother, it meant he was looking at a Salad for whom nothing was wrong.

It was probably the best he’d ever seen her, to be honest.

“Howdy Salad. Safe trip?”

“For the most part. There was a thing with timberwolves, but she scared ‘em off.” He raised an eyebrow, and she gave a short laugh. “I know, right? It was weird.”

“Ah take it there’s a story there?”

“One or two. Also… I met the Windfish.”

“Did’ja?”

“…yeah.” Salad said, angling her eyes to the side and giving a short nod. Big Mac returned it.

He’d met the Windfish last year. He knew.

“Anythin’ else happen?”

“I’m… I might be… friends. With her. Or something.” She scowled and huffed. “I’m not even really sure.”

“Did she say yer friends?”

“…kinda, yeah.”

“Welp, yer friends then.”

“That simple?”

“For some, yeah.” The stallion answered. “For me. For her. If Ah recall, for you too.”

“…huh.” Big Mac smirked, and reached a hind hoof behind him to give a tree a calculated tap. A single apple fell into his waiting hoof.

“Oh the house. Ya earned that much at least.”

“Just one?”

“Ya also met the dreamer. The apple’s icin’ on the cake.”

“…yeah, I guess…” Salad agreed, taking a bite.

Big Mac wondered why he could hear thanks when she plainly hadn’t said it.

“So, did I miss anything?”

“Ivan applied.” Big Mac said. Salad’s eyes widened.

“…Huh. When?”

“The day ya left, actually. Maybe he thought he’d surprise ya if they got back to him.”

“…huh.”

“Hey kids, while we’re on the subject-“

“Oh what the buck Dad?!” Salad yelled turning at the sound of the new voice. Big Mac followed the sound.

Treading air a short distance above was a pegasus a deeper red than him. A mane as white as a cloud flowed dramatically, despite there being no wind.

“What kind of greeting is that? You haven’t seen me in a while Sally.”

“And you say hi by sneaking up behind your daughter and eavesdropping like some creeper. There’s a reason mom blames you for me turning out the way I did.”

“Sneaking? Pfft, like I’m going to make noise when I fly. That’s silly. You’re silly.”

“What are you even doing here? I mean, yeah, I guess you’re here for big bro, but you couldn’t have sent word?”

The red pegasus raised an eyebrow as he landed.

“We did send word. You should’ve had four or five days notice.”

“…we? Oh buck don’t tell me-“

“Yeah, she’s here. Good thing too. I’ve got a job to do, and she’s gonna make it easy and entertaining!”

“…dad I’m going to kill you if he dies.” Salad said, before she turned and jumped towards town.

“…So. You were talking to my daughter. Alone.” Said the stallion.

“Ah was.” Big Mac answered.

“I can cause a hurricane in seven seconds.”

“Ah delt with one o’ those once.” Mac recalled with a hoof on his chin. “As Ah recall, tore a house clean off the foundation and threw it. Nearly crushed mah baby sister.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Ah bucked it in half.” Mac said.

“…I like you.” Salad’s dad said with a roguish smile. “Gale Force.”

“Big Macintosh.” He returned with a nod and a hoofshake. “Care to tell me what’s going on?”

“Better yet. Want to see Ivan get the stuffing beaten out of him?” Big Mac had actually seen that before, given Memry, but something told him this would be twice as good.

“Lead the way.”

--

Ivan was out on a casual stroll through the park with Cheerilee. Sun shining, crusaders nowhere to be found…

A chill ran down his spine. Whenever he realised a day was perfect, it suddenly took a turn for the horrible.

“’Allo.” That chill from a second ago returned and froze his bones in place.

“Oh, hello.” Cheerilee said as she turned, completely oblivious to the impossible horror. “Can I help you?”

“Non. I have found everything zat I need.”

She was exactly as he remembered. A light green coat, violet eyes, platinum blonde mane… She'd aged gracefully, he noticed. Part of him noticed laugh lines, and he was happy that his leaving hadn't taken her smile.

He knew that expression presently on her face though. He was proper bucked.

“Mother.” Ivan greeted, evenly, betraying nothing, even though inside he was screaming at fate for mercy.

“…your mother? Really?” Cheerilee said with a rapidly widening smile. “Well! Pleased to meet you! I’m Cheerilee!”

“Riposte.” Ivan’s mother returned, not taking her eyes off her wayward son. “I would love to talk to you, Cheerilee, but I have business with mon fils.”

“…Oh?”

“Ivan, you’ve been very naughty.” Riposte continued, horn starting to glow as she approached.

Cheerilee’s eyes widened in alarm when, for the first time ever, Ivan stepped back.

“…missed you?” Ivan tried.

“I have missed you too, my darling boy. It is natural. I love you to pieces after all.”

“…oh moon.” Ivan whispered under his breath.

“If you are not careful, Ivan, I may just love you to death.” Riposte lunged, a violet rapier thrusting out of the aether and towards Ivan’s head.

Ivan, having dealt with more terrifying (or Memry should have been more terrifying, but no, this was different) creatures charging him, reacted on practised instinct.

A green shield barely stopped the rapier. Meaning that the blade penetrated and stopped an inch from Ivan’s face.

And a rather new spell of Ivan’s, a simple wave of kinetic force, shot forth with a bang and blew Riposte off her feet. She barely had time to gasp in surprise before she was tumbling head over hoof to land in an undignified heap several meters away.

She pulled herself up, laughing in a way that slowly declined in sanity. Ivan found himself wondering what the flying buck he had just done.

“Ah, my boy! How you’ve grown!” A gauche appeared to support the sword, and Ivan’s mind fell out of general paralysis and into ‘your life is in peril, be a stallion’.

Riposte’s grin widened as Ivan’s halberd appeared.

Cheerilee stared for a moment, before walking away and sitting under a tree to watch. This wasn’t the first time one of their dates was interrupted by a maniac out for blood, and she was quite sure it wouldn’t be the last.

…This was a bit of a special case though, so she’d forgive him. He’d probably need a hug later anyway.

Ivan analyzed his opponent while she stood there possibly doing the same.

Riposte’s special talent was dueling, as illustrated by the rapier on her flank. Combat against a single foe.

…Ivan’s though was combat in general. He wondered if this was how Twilight felt.

Either way though, he remembered once upon a time that Salad mentioned their mother had taken a championship of some sort. Meaning he was probably on his way to a pretty harsh beating if he didn't get creative.

…But then… it would be nice to play with his mom again, after so many years.

“Are you ready boy?”

“Yes.” Ivan answered, fear gone. “Enjoy yourself.” He was still intimidated, oh hay yes, and he had just given her general permission to go all out, but he was thrilled in ways he couldn’t explain.

Freud could suck a lemon though, this wasn’t a complex. This was a game.

“You will regret zat.” An odd twist to levitation was used to quicken her steps, and Ivan decided to ask her about it later. The blades left a trail as they swung, on purpose he guessed. It made it more difficult to see where she was attacking from.

It was a beautiful show of technique and ingenuity as she positioned herself to strike from a direction Ivan hadn’t been able to anticipate.

He aimed his horn and blew the ground apart at her hooves.

Riposte flew much in the way she had before, forward this time. Ivan made to catch her in his forehooves, but instead got a flying buck to the chest as she righted herself in midair.

The wind left his lungs but the blades didn’t stop moving. The halberd and shield were hard pressed to catch them all, but her hooves still found his head as she twisted herself into a more favourable position.

Ivan, still stunned from the first kick, could barely defend from the blades as he took blow after blow on his body from his mother’s hooves.

Riposte’s eyes widened as Ivan’s grit teeth curled into a smile. Memry hit so much harder than this.

It was the first time he had ever seen a unicorn backflip, as a huge green hammer fell where she had been standing a moment ago.

“…what have you been doing, boy?”

“Getting hurt.” Ivan replied.

A whip lanced from his horn and led his charge, seeking one of Riposte’s forelegs.

It was the oddest thing that blocked it. A wide ribbon of magic, shimmering as it wove through the air and intercepted the tendril. A tricky shield that could move the same way her blades did.

Ivan had closed the distance and lashed with his shield, throwing his halberd out from below. Both were blocked by blades, leaving her unprepared for the hammer that was falling from above.

Riposte smiled in a way that radiated quiet pride.

Then a third blade appeared and forced Ivan to move his head out of the way. A fourth nearly skewered him from above. A fifth and sixth spun in and forced his retreat.

She stood there, admiring him as the blades and ribbon orbited her in shifting patterns.

“Ah! ‘Ow foolish of me. This is no match, there is no judge. There are no rules.” She giggled in a way that Ivan was sure probably scared the hay out of his marefriend on the sidelines. “’Ow quickly I forget I can fight ‘ow I please. ‘Ow did you learn to fight like this?”

Ivan's shifted his weight anxiously. “Brutally.”

“I approve.” Riposte said as more blades began to appear. “Grandfather would be proud.”

“Fares?” Ivan asked, his horn glowing ever brighter as spells unburied themselves from his mind and were reviewed as possible options.

“He took ill for a time. A burglar attempted to rob him. He climbed out of bed and beat every shade of black and blue I could zink of into him. Right as rain the next day.” The blades were varied. Rapiers, daggers, pikes… Ivan squinted and thought he saw a katana in the mess somewhere.

“Expected.” Ivan answered. A heavy looking axe thudded into the ground at his side, next to a floating second halberd.

He chuckled as it all came back to him. Old grandfather Blood Knight was a fountain of happy memories.

“He told me to treat you extra rough when you were finally found.”

“Try.”

Ivan fancied he heard a bell for round two. His horn glowed brighter and Riposte laughed her surprise when the ground lurched under her feet.

The blades moved like a hive of wasps, numbering at least twenty and fanning out to attack him from multiple directions. Halberds twirled and the hammer flew forward and cleared the path as Ivan ran. The axe fell but was stopped cold by the ribbon.

Ivan spun around to attempt giving his mother two hinds to the chin, only for the ribbon to lengthen and stop the kick a millimeter from her mad grin.

Ivan smiled in a way that showed the apple hadn’t fallen far, as he tilted his head down and fired.

Riposte shielded her face from the debris, and wondered where her son had gone.

Then she looked up and saw the oddest thing.

Whisping clouds of cold and raging streams of fire twisted and danced with eachother as they came rushing down at her.

The ribbon warped and wavered and managed to stop and smother flames while another spell emitted enough heat to dull the sting of the cold.

And through the swirling chaos above her shot Ivan, halberd pointed down and held in his hooves.

The ribbon was busy, and his shield deflected her raining blades.

She couldn’t move. The ground around her hooves was frozen. She would slip and it would be over.

Riposte cackled as she crossed a pair of swords above her head. The last time she had been in this much trouble was the time she had that spat with her husband.

Ivan’s screaming descent stopped cold against his mother’s defense and the explosion was deafening as both weapons shattered, and the force of it bounced Ivan off in another direction.

Riposte felt the shock of her weapon breaking jolt through her system, and couldn’t stop the resulting shockwave from crushing her against the ground.

And several meters away, Ivan landed hard on his back.

Both were obviously breathing, and conscious, but neither were about to do much of anything for a while.

On the sidelines, Cheerilee and Salad’s mouths hung open. Gale looked the scene over with a discerning eye.

“…I honestly didn’t expect a tie. Ivan got huge while he was gone...”

“…I… what?! You knew this was gonna happen?!” Salad hissed. Gale shrugged.

“Ivan applied for the bracer. I volunteered to scout the talent. And I knew just how overjoyed your mother would be to meet her long lost son after so many years.”

“…I’m… I’m convinced.” Salad said, a trembling twitch in her eye. “I’m the only sane one in our family. You’re a bucking evil mastermind, mom’s an insane psycho, and Ivan’s some crazy idiot who power levels off of lamia and does things above his pay grade. I cook. I cook bucking awesome, but I still just cook. Why are you all so…”

“Bad? We are pretty bad. One time I was bad enough to- wait, did you say lamia?“

“Yeah. They're just as vicious as rumours say. Ivan hasn't managed to beat her yet.”

“...Eh. Point is, Ivan’s in. He’ll still have to go through basic training, but given the work out he just gave your mother, he could probably accelerate through that. Then we’ll hand him a shiny new bracer and he can start doing what our family does best.”

“Almost die while smiling like it’s your birthday?”

“Be bang out of order, yes. Big Macintosh?”

“Yeah?” The other stallion answered, still not altogether sure what to make of what he just saw.

“Could you go on ahead and tell the hospital to expect some business?”

“They’ve already got a room reserved for Ivan. Plaque an’ everythin’.” Gale Force shed a single stalliony tear.

“…so much like his mother…”

Afternoon Tea

Chapter Nine: Afternoon Tea
or
HAH HAH... Multiple Entendres!

The diagnosis was magical whiplash. Ivan and Riposte both would be forced to take it easy on magic for perhaps the rest of the day.

Then Nurse Redheart found out that Riposte was Ivan’s mother and they had done that to each other.

“You have your work cut out for you.” Redheart said when she stopped banging her head on the wall. “That one’s got a hereditary death wish that somehow beats Rainbow Dash.”

“Believe me. If you saw what actually happened…” Cheerilee shook her head as she just decided to leave it at that.

The company walked out of the hospital.

“So, Ivan, know an-“

“I do.” Riposte said. “I found a hotel on the way to our son.”

“Oh, well then, how abo-“

“Non.” Riposte interrupted, a gleam in her eye similar to the one she had during the battle. “We go. Now.”

Gale Force found himself slung over his wife’s back and moving toward parts unknown.

“Huh. I guess we’ll talk later. Bye kids!” Gale looked totally alright with getting kidnapped. Their daughter groaned.

“Careful Dad, you might approach subtlety one of these days!” Salad yelled after them. “Honestly, bro, do you-“

She stopped talking immediately after she noticed Ivan wasn’t listening. He was far too busy exploring the back of Cheerilee’s throat.

The teacher, probably taken by surprise, was unable to resist.

And so it was that she found herself slung over Ivan’s back in very much a similar manner then his father was.

“Bye.” He said, turning and strutting his way back to his marefriend’s bed, Cheerilee’s dazed protests trailing off into the distance.

“…I hate my family.” Salad said. “How did he turn out like that? He was gone for ten bucking years. They didn’t even really raise him. This defies explanation.”

“Does it bother ya?” Big Mac asked, somewhat amused by the whole thing.

“It doesn’t really bother me at all. It’s just…” They started walking in no particular direction. “It’s like, they’re throwing it in our faces. You don’t care?”

“Means they’ll be in a good mood when we see ‘em next.” Mac said with a shrug.

“Well yeah, I guess… Ugh, it’s just going to be a long string of ‘that fish was this big’ stories next time they’re together. Mom and Dad get into fights all the time, and so does he.”

“Well, ya could always open up with yer fights with Dash an’ that bear.”

“That’d make it worse. Then I’d be like, one of them.” Salad shuddered. “I kind of want to be defined by more then the things I beat the hay out of.”

“So far yer defined by death threats an’ cookin’ like nopony’s business.”

“How would you know?”

“Welp,” He said, leaning his head back, “death threats seem to be a part of who ya are.”

“Flattering.”

“An’ Ah got a slice o’ that pie ya made Fluttershy.”

“…when?”

“She brought a slice over when she asked me to go with her to the windfish. Ya got a lot o’ skill there.”

“I, um…” He couldn’t fathom why the compliment made her prickle up the way she did. “I only did that becau-“

“She told me.” He said. “And Ah wouldn’t expect ya to just up an’ make her a pie before the trip mellowed ya both out.”

“Y-yeah.”

“What’s got ya so worried now?” He asked. Salad huffed to herself.

“In my experience, anypony who heard about something like that’d immediately think I was after her plot.”

“In mah experience,” Mac echoed, “there’s a lotta ponies who see what just ain’t there for the hay of it.”

“…True that, Red.” Salad said.

“…while we’re on the subject, ya’re really alright?”

“Yeah.” Salad nodded, tension leaving. “We’ve… kind of got an understanding now.”

“An ‘understanding’?”

“Whatever it is, I can look her in the eye now. I’m, well…” She sighed.

“Mm?”

“I’m… I don’t know if I’m really friends with her. She says she’s friends with me, but… am I making sense here?”

“Ah got ya.” He said. “What are ya gonna do about it?”

“…She’s…” Her eyes fell to the ground. “…she’s worth it.”

“Yeah?”

“You’re worth it. It’s why I hang around you. And she’s worth it too. She’s really…”

“Careful now.” The stallion chuckled. “Anypony else’d get the wrong idea, the way ya trail off like that.”

“…is it weird I don’t even know what the idea is in the first place?”

“Could be.” He said. “Mah feelin’s have always bin cut and dry. Never really had much trouble with ‘em.”

“You saying I’m weird?”

“The world ain’t a very normal place.” Mac countered. “Ah got mah comfort zone. Mah farm, the fields, mah own little world with it’s own ways and direction it turns… everythin’ outside it is different.”

“Different how?”

“Jus’ different. Like red an’ blue. Hard to explain, ya just look at it an' it’s different.”

“…your point?”

“Fluttershy’s world might not be somethin’ ya’ve ever seen before.” He said. “Somethin’ so different ya don’t know what to make of it. But ya look at it, and the mare it revolves around and think ya might want to get to know it a little better.

“It don’t mean yer sweet on her, not really. It means ya jus’ wanna see ‘bout makin’ sense of what yer seein’. It’s what got ya started talkin’ to me, right?”

“I… well, yeah, I guess. Something like that…”

“Then it’ll get ya started talkin’ to her. She spends most of her time at home, and ya know where it is now. Pop in for a visit sometime.”

“…I don’t know if she’d like me at all.” Salad said. “She kind of… she did something for me, the whole trip. Gave up a lot of sleep doing it. And I didn’t know she was doing it until the very end. And the whole time I was… well you know how I was.”

“Ah do.”

“…Do you know what it’s like for everypony to lie to you?”

“…huh?”

“You know it’s not true. But they’re lying to you anyway, and they believe they’re telling the truth when they do it. And every time you hear the same old lies they start sounding a bit more…”

Mac said nothing, changing direction toward the farm. The quiet road there would be a better place for whatever Salad was trying to get off her chest.

“I sort of… grew up. With all that. And when I got out in the world and started looking for Ivan, it didn’t change. That’s my world. My world is just a bunch of ponies treating me like either a charity case, or some unfortunate victim. A few more look at me, and I know. I know they think I’m better off dead.

“You’ll never know what it’s like. You can’t lose a wing or a horn. And I’m so glad you don’t need to know what it’s like. You don’t deserve that. And…

“…that’s what my world is. And I don’t think I want her to be a part of that.”

“But it’s good enough for me?” the stallion asked.

“You’re harder then she is.” she replied. Big Mac hummed his agreement.

“…Ya grew up with all that?” he asked after a few seconds. She laughed bitterly to herself.

“…it’s all I really knew.” She said. “…might be my fault. After a little while I kind of decided I was done trying for better. Ivan was all I really had left. For the longest time I thought he was the last chance I had at having a pony in my life who I knew didn’t have to care. I didn’t even know if he would. I didn’t hope. The journey wasn’t just for him. I wanted… closure, I guess.”

“…ya forgave him.”

“I did. Ivan’s the reason I had to deal with all of that. But he’s never lied to me. Not once.

“We met up and… we talked about a lot of stuff when we finally sat down together. And he still trusted me, when I could’ve been a crazy broken mare out for his blood for some twisted revenge. He trusted me with his back. Up there on that bucking robot with Fusion, I told him I could take care of myself, and he believed me. And he trusted me with his back. And… I don’t think he’ll ever really know how heavy that was.

“Forgiving him was… easy. I couldn’t believe how easy it was. Ivan didn’t tell a bunch of ponies that a one winged pegasus was a travesty. Ivan didn’t lie to me. That was every pony I talked to for more then a few sentences, most of which he never even came into contact with. He took my wing, but… he wasn’t any of the ponies who ruined my life. And I’m glad I didn’t have to stop loving him.”

“…Ya alright?”

“I’m fine.” She said. “I don’t… I don’t even really know why I told you all that. Kind of went off on a tangent.”

“Maybe a little.” He said. “It’s yer world though.”

“But yeah. I think that might be a bit much for Shy.” Big Mac shrugged.

“Might not be an issue of yer world bein’ a bad place. Might be an issue of makin’ it better.”

“And how the hay would I do that?”

“Friends tend to be a big help.”

“…So, that stuff about worlds and stuff? Did you come up with that yourself?” Mac gave a short laugh.

“Ah just got a wise granny. Come on, Ah’m free now. We’ll go together.”

“Uh, I did kind of just see her. Trip and all that.”

“Maybe, but Ah feel like visitin’. Hearin’ the story. An’ the only place ya got left to go is Cheerilee’s.”

“…Good point, let’s go.”

--

“Good evening Macintosh. And hello again Salad. What brings you by?”

“Everypony else I know is having-“

“Ahem.” coughed Big Mac.

“-a hard time with how busy they are, so I got out of their way.” Salad finished, rolling her eyes.

Fluttershy looked back and forth between the two, unable to shake the feeling she was missing something.

“…would you like to come in for tea?”

“Much obliged.” Mac said, slipping off his yoke and leaning it near the door.

Salad stepped in after him, looking over the inside of the cottage.

…Hearths Warming Eve’s cards look less homey and cozy than this.

“How has your day been?”

“Uneventful, for the most part.” Mac said, settling himself into a chair.

“The most part, yeah.” Salad deadpanned. “Then I came back and it all went to Tartarus in a tea trolley.”

“Did you… um…” Poor Fluttershy couldn’t bring herself to voice the concern, probably wanting to ask if Salad stirred up some kind of trouble.

The other pegasus took pity on her.

“Nah, I didn’t fight anypony.”

“Oh thank goodness.”

“My brother did though. Oh did he ever.” Salad wondered if it made her a bad pony that she thought it was so hilarious Fluttershy’s pupils contracted the way they did when she gasped in horror.

“Oh heavens! Nopony was hurt, were they?”

“Ivan and mom both got magical whiplash, or something. Easy magic for a day and they’ll be better in no time. Though it really isn’t stopping them from getting-“

“Ahem.”

“-all the essentials done for today.”

“I-I’m sorry to hear that.” The vet said. “Um… did somepony attack them?”

“They attacked eachother.”

“W-why would they do that?!”

“Ivan was a bad pony.” Salad shrugged. “Ask Cheerilee. She probably knows all about how low he can go by now.”

The pink pony glanced at Big Mac, whom looked satisfied enough. Innuendo seemed to be just fine.

“The aftermath left a crater in the park.” Big Mac informed. “So ya ain’t shocked if ya see it before it gets fixed up.”

“You could say they’re making the earth move.”

“What, um… actually happened?” Fluttershy asked, eyeing Salad oddly.

“Something that’s going to take a lot of time in bed to get over.” Salad said, thinking that she might have been having entirely too much fun with it. Big Mac shook his head.

“Ivan did somethin’ crazy, ya’ve probably heard it all before. Just so happens his mom’s even crazier than him.”

“Don’t even worry about it Shy.” Salad said, waving a hoof in indifference. “For them that was kind of like saying hello. Everything they’re doing today is just getting it out of their systems.”

“Oh…” Fluttershy didn’t seem to understand really. Which was a good thing, it meant she was sane.

Here in this cozy house with the only two sane ponies she knew she could recover from the train wreck that was her family.

…a cup of tea sounded really good about now, actually.

“Oh, please excuse me.” Their host said when, right on cue, the kettle started to go off.

“…yer gonna be doin’ that the entire time we’re here, aren’t ya?” Mac asked, eyebrow raised.

“It’s the little things that keep me going.” She smirked. “Making you uncomfortable?”

“Ah just ain’t much for jokes just for one pony.”

“Not just a joke for me.” Salad said as the smirk turned just the slightest touch evil. “It’s a set up.”

“For what?”

“Possibly finding out just how priceless this mares reactions can be.”

“Fluttershy is not a toy.” He paused. “…Ah can not believe Ah just had to say that.”

“Was it good for you?”

“Stop that.” Fluttershy chose that point to walk back into the room, a tea tray on her wing.

“I, um… I hope you like this. I don’t have any other tea, so…”

“Won’t kill me.” Salad said, pouring the water. “So, how good’s that bunny you left the place with?”

“Oh, he’s very resourceful.” Fluttershy said, stirring her cup with a fond smile. “The animals all listen, and he knows what needs to be done. The place runs itself if I ever have to go anywhere.”

“How often do ya have to leave?” Big Mac asked, curious. “Ya get any more jobs like the special one?”

“Oh no.” She said with a shake of her head. “But I do sometimes have to make house calls. And sometimes the animals have friends they ask me to look after.”

“How do you have time for it all?” Salad asked, taking a sip of her unexpectedly delicious tea.

“Most of what I have to do is just… um, go take a look?” she said with a hoof on her chin. “Sometimes there’s a scratch, or something like that. It doesn’t take long to take care of.”

“…I’ll buy that.” Salad said. “You didn’t take long to deal with me after that bear of yours and I had it out.”

“Ah, I’ve had practice.” Fluttershy said. “Rainbow Dash used to get hurt all the time before she got so good at flying. I learned to help her, and then… well…

“…I started wanting to help Angel one day when he hurt one of his paws, so I learned how to do that, and then I found out there were courses I could take at home, and before I knew it I was a qualified vet.

“My job got easier though when I started talking to Zecora. She knew all sorts of herbal remedies, and ointments…”

“Ones that work?” Salad asked. “I hear about herbal stuff all the time and most of the time they’re just more expensive sugar tablets.”

“They don’t have the best reputation, but Zecora knows which ones work best. She was the one that made the cure for the trip.”

“Come to think of it…” Big Mac mused. “Doesn’t she live in the forest? Ain’t that dangerous?”

“Um… I asked her about that one day.” Fluttershy said, frowning. “She knows which plants and things are harmful. And she told me that, um… Everything else ‘knows better’?”

“…sounds like a pony with the right idea.” Salad said. Fluttershy shook her head no.

“Zebra, actually.”

“What’s she doing this far from home?” Mac asked. “To be honest, Ah ain’t heard much about her, aside from her causin’ a scare when she rolled into town.”

“Like, the whole town?” Salad asked. Big Mac nodded. “Oh wow, tell me what she did. I want to know if it’s still too late for me to do it.”

“Um… she… sort of… just walked into town.” Fluttershy said, fidgeting with her hooves.

“…just like that?”

“She was wearing a cloak. It was… very mysterious.”

“…I didn’t hear about anything like that happening when Ivan came into town.” She said. “And he looked like a mysterious stranger too. He still does.”

“We learned after the first time. We love and tolerate.”

“Don’t be sad now.” Said Mac. “Just fight another bear an’ ya’ll have everypony scared good an’ proper.”

“Oh no, please don’t-“

“Relax Shy, I was joking. Geeze.” Salad sighed, finished her cup, and reached for the teapot. “This isn’t bad by the way.”

“Oh, thank you. It’s my favorite.”

--

Big Mac detected a slight flutter in the demure mare’s wings at the praise. Curiosity piqued, he started discretely paying attention.

Salad said a pegasus’ wings were personal, but they were on display all the time. Possibly a thing of ‘look but don’t touch’. Though staring might be rude. He wasn’t sure.

“When in doubt, don’t.” his pa said one day a long time ago. “Or don’t get caught.” He had added with a wink.

Words to live by… the farmpony mused.

Fluttershy didn’t seem to be too nervous, odd for a pony like her. Especially around a loud and blunt personality like Salad. It might’ve had something to do with the unique circumstances around the way they had got to know each other. The flutter meant she was pleased then.

“Oh yeah? Where’d you get it?” Salad asked.

“I’m not actually sure… I get some every year for my birthday from my grandmother.” Fluttershy said.

“You wasted birthday tea on me?” Salad’s single wing didn’t move at all. Big Mac himself could tell the admission probably made Salad a little uncomfortable though. There were other signs.

She tapped her hoof on the table, seeming impatient. Mac decided it meant she had been worked up a little.

She was apprehensive and overanalysing, he thought, given her admissions earlier about Fluttershy. Probably wondering if the tea meant something, and what it might be.

...wouldn’t the wing have moved then?

…do you know what it’s like for everypony to lie to you?

She wasn’t good at opening up. Part of the reason he was here was because he didn’t think she’d go talk to Fluttershy on her own.

He wondered if one of the things she did was learn to restrict body language. To partial success, he decided, as now that he thought about it, the only times he ever saw the wing move was when she was about to jump, or if she was angry.

Pegasi might pay attention to wings for body language. In turn, pegasi would probably be most aggressive toward her, given her state. So she would’ve made herself more difficult for pegasi to read.

…what else had she done?

“I'll get more later.” Fluttershy said. “The less often I have it, the more special it is.”

“Still, you just gave up magical grandma birthday tea to a pony you barely know.”

“O-oh…” Fluttershy’s wings, normally loosely folded at rest, tightened up to her back as she brought in her forehooves. That was nervousness. She was probably second guessing herself now.

“Could’ve saved it, just sayin’.”

“Well… aren’t we friends?” The way her head was bowed and she looked up at Salad through pink tresses probably would’ve killed the scarred mare if she had a softer heart.

“I…” And Salad looked pretty lost. Big Mac raised an eyebrow when her wing finally moved, little minute taps against the back of her chair. She was backed into a corner of sorts, and was trying to find the best way out.

“I, uh… guess so…?”

“Y-you don’t have to, um… if you don’t want to be…”

“I, I wouldn’t say it if I didn’t mean it.” Big Mac fought back a chuckle.

Now that Salad actually cared about the other mare’s feelings, it was fun to watch them trip over eachother.

…he wondered if the pink mare was rubbing off on him.

“Oh, good.” Fluttershy said, sighing her relief as her wings relaxed. “Then you can have as much tea as you like.”

“Don’t just offer that to anypony.” Salad muttered.

“But we’re friends. You’re not just anypony.”

“That’s not the point, it’s like, special to you. So you could totally hoard it and it’d be fine.”

“But I want to share.”

“But you only get this stuff like, once a year, right? And you’re like ‘oh, grams gave it to me and I love it so’, how do you think that makes me feel, taking something like that?” Fluttershy’s pupils seemed to vanish, they shrank so much, and Salad looked like she experienced a feeling not unlike missing the last stair.

Oh boy, here we go. Big Mac thought.

“oh my Celestia, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to-“

“No, stop, that’s not what-“

“-make you feel bad I just really like it and so-

“-I meant, just, wait-“

“S-should I take it back?!”

“No, just, you’re not listening-“

“I’m so sorry-“

“Would you stop!? I’m trying-“

“you’re yelling at me oh sun please-”

Big Mac wasn’t normally one for tea, but the cup he was currently trying wasn’t half bad. Not something he’d get again, he was a coffee stallion for life, but not too bad at all.

“-I’ll do anything please don’t be mad-“

“I’m not, sun, you’re such a-“

“-at me I promise I’ll make it up to yo-“

“Angel.” Big Mac called. “Could Ah get a hoof here?” The rabbit soon appeared, carrying a brown paper bag.

Much obliged, critter.

--

A minute or so of breathing into the bag later, a calmer Fluttershy once again tried to apologise. Big Mac coughed, and both mares looked to him.

“Fluttershy.”

“Y-yes?”

“Salad was afraid that ya offered us that tea outta some sense o’ obligation. She don’t think, since ya both’ve only been friends a few days, that her visit needs that kinda hospitality.”

“T-that’s not-“

“Oh what the bu-“

“Salad.” He cut off, turning to the other mare.

“What.”

“Fluttershy wants to treat her friends well so that they treat her well in return. While she does have friends more near and dear, she still values ya, and likes tryin’ to share herself with ya. Like lettin’ ya taste her favorite tea. She’s doin’ it ‘cause she likes ya.”

“Wait, what?”

“M-Macintosh, I-“

“An’ just now, Ah was invasive, and had no real business just up and tellin’ ya both how ya tick like that, but if Ah didn’t, ya would’ve probably spent a good hour doin’ what ya just got through doin’, one o’ ya woulda left, an’ ya’d probably spend like, a week pussyhoofin’ around eachother. An’ since Ah’m the only common friend between the two o’ ya, Ah’d probably have to do somethin’ anyway. This way is easier.”

“…O-oh… thank you?”

“You’re still a jackass.”

“Yer both welcome.” Big Mac said. “Now hug.”

“No.” Said Salad. Fluttershy actually looked a little hurt, but Big Mac supposed he couldn’t ask for much better in the way of outcomes.

“Fair. Now drink yer tea.” Salad appeared to mutter something, Big Mac couldn’t catch it, but the scarred mare didn’t argue.

Fluttershy hesitated, before picking up her cup and taking a dainty sip.

Mac waited a bit until her wings relaxed.

“Now. What’s this Ah heard ‘bout timberwolves?”

--

They left the cottage around five, given that Mac would probably have dinner on the way, and Salad was quite convinced that the house would be quiet by the time she arrived.

He walked her home and smiled when she hesitated, before politely nodding and shutting the door.

On his way back to Sweet Apple Acres, he glanced at the tree near Ponyville Square, and something occurred to him at the back of his mind.

He approached and gave the door a firm knock.

“…Oh, Big Macintosh? I was just about to close up…”

“Sorry Miss Twilight. Don’t suppose there’s enough time for me to take a look around?”

“Of course! Please, come in!”

A few minutes of exchanged pleasantries, a few questions about what he was after, and soon Big Mac found himself holding a book he was already looking forward to perusing.

“You read this one?”

“Oh yes. Quite enlightening, actually. Helped out with a few of my friends, I’m sure you can imagine.”

“Might help with a couple o’ mine. Much obliged Miss Twilight.”

The unicorn smiled amiably, and made her way to the checkout log.

Big Mac looked again over the book he had been given.

“Hm… Mood Wings…” It certainly sounded promising…

Sleeping In

Chapter Eleven: Sleeping In
or
Something I May Be Hated For...

Salad woke up warm, but it was a different kind of warm than she was used to. Not the comfortable warmth of blankets she had spent the night under.

…she didn’t flinch or start when she remembered how they had all fallen asleep. She now noticed that breeze blowing through the top of her mane was Fluttershy’s breathing, as Salad’s head was nestled in the crook of the other mare’s neck. And her other ear was listening to Red’s heartbeat.

Am I getting used to this?

While the hugging had only happened twice, for a decent stretch of time both instances…

…She supposed it was ponies actually caring that she was getting used to. She wondered if she would start taking it for granted.

She did have Ivan, but he couldn’t really do this with her if he was involved with Cheerilee. And maybe there was the sibling thing, whatever.

…maybe she was reading too far into this. Maybe when she didn’t tell them she was done, they just didn’t let go. And they kind of fell asleep?

…do I ask?

The breath blowing through her mane changed it’s rhythm. Fluttershy was awake. Or maybe half asleep, as she squeezed Salad a little tighter. She wouldn’t normally do that, right?

…she squeezed back, unsure if she would get another opportunity like this.

“Good morning.” Shy whispered.

“…G’mornin’.” Red returned.

Huh... they're both awake? Why hasn't this stopped yet then?

“…yeah.” Salad said.

“…Ah think Ah may have overstayed mah welcome.” Red noted, his tone hinting at a sheepish smile on his face. Salad couldn’t see it. Even if her eyes were open, she’d just see a bunch of pegasus throat.

“It was… nice.” Fluttershy said, idly nuzzling Salad.

“…Is this what friends do?” Salad asked, wanting to get it out of the way before the butter mare gave her any more mixed signals.

“Not normally.” Red said, shifting his weight. His forelegs, wrapped around both mares, didn’t move. “Wanna make a habit o’ it?”

“…I don’t know.” Salad answered truthfully, thoughts reeling nowhere.

“The way ya apparently eye mah flank says otherw-ow.” Salad shifted a hoof to give him a good punch in the side. He totally deserved it.

“What about you, Shy? Shouldn’t you be… I dunno, hiding somewhere right now? This seems out of character.”

“Um… You…”

“Yeah?”

“You… make me feel…” Salad’s heart started to race, and she imagined imaginary background music swelling for what was about to be a confession of deep feelings.

“…assertive.”

“…Ah.” Heart rate dropped. Music stopped unexpectedly. Subconscious gave her an uneasy pat on the withers.

Better luck next time.

“…how’s that?”

“Um… I…”

“Might be that yer… kinda worse at this than she is." Big Mac supplied. "Don't hit me again."

Salad snorted back irritation. “Well that explains why you’re cuddling me. Wouldn’t Red make you nervous though?”

“…Normally. I think so… but… I didn’t…”

“Ah mighta took advantage o’ the situation.” Mac said, not ashamed at all.

“Wanted both of us? Shy’s probably met foxes less sly than that.”

“Ah’m holdin’ two, so there ya go.”

“Oh, flatterer.” Salad deadpanned as she tried to puzzle out why flattery was suddenly working. It never did before.

Might be because these two matter. Might also be because you’re wrapped up in a pair of wings, and a set of the most honest forelegs you’ve ever met.

…seriously he could probably buck a house in half.

“M-Macintosh, I-“ Shy stuttered and trailed off.

“Ah, there ya are. Knew it wouldn’t last forever. Should Ah let ya up?”

“U-um…”

“…Ah kinda like it like this. Ah won’t let go unless ya want me to.”

“…I, um… don’t… mind?”

“She wouldn’t.” Salad said. “I caught her saying your name in her sleep during the trip.”

“S-Salad!” She sounded scandalised. The only reason Salad said it though was because she knew the big stallion wouldn't react negatively.

“Now Ah feel flattered.”

“Suppose you would.” Salad said, finally getting together the will needed to do something that wasn’t more snuggling. “Let me up Shy, I’ll just get out of the way.”

“…um…” She didn’t let her go. Red didn’t move either.

“What makes ya think yer in the way?”

“…are you running?” Shy asked, and something in Salad froze at the question.

“…what-“

“You… what you said… that was mean.” She said. “Just… just saying that and leaving isn’t fair.”

“…figured you’d want to, you know, just keep the cuddle fest going. Maybe do something else, I dunno.” Shy stiffened, probably quite embarrassed at that point.

“Like what?” Red asked, and she could hear the joking tone in his voice.

“Use your imagination.” She growled. “You’re kind of… being obvious. Both of you are. Why are you making me stay when you two are fixing to make out or something? Need a chaperone?”

“Ah’ll let ya up if ya wanna go.” Red said, sounding serious.

“Cool. Let go.”

“Nnnope.”

“…what’s your game here?” Salad, to her credit, didn’t punch him again.

“Ya don’t wanna go.”

“…if you don’t let me-“

“Please don’t fight.” Shy said. “Macintosh, if she says-“

“Then why haven’t ya let go of her?” Shy’s protests immediately died as she tried to figure out why exactly she hadn’t. “Yer holdin’ her with yer wings. That’s a bit more personal than a regular hug.”

“How would you know?” Salad said. “Wasn’t too long ago you didn’t eve-“

“Ah took out a book at the library.” Red replied. “An’ you don’t get to talk if yer holdin’ her with yer wing.”

A moment of shock as she realized that yes, she was in fact doing just that. When did her wing get involved?

Feathers spread, trying to cover as much of Fluttershy as she could… when did she do that?

“…What’s your point?”

“Yer obviously fine with where ya are. Ya don’t wanna go. So I ain’t lettin’ go.”

“I said I do.”

“Yer lyin’.”

“How do you figure?”

“Mah special talent.” He said. Salad punched him again.

“Oof… alright, it’s cause yer still holdin’ Fluttershy after Ah brought it up.” Salad almost let go right there. She didn’t because that’d be like admitting her hoof was in the cookie jar. It wasn’t because Fluttershy was huggably soft.

He can read you like a book and he isn’t even looking at you.

Her subconscious wasn’t helping and needed to shut up.

The truth hurts, doesn’t it? This is what you get for letting this happen.

Red was beating around a bush, but Salad couldn’t pin down just which bush it was.

You know which one you’d like it to be.

That was about as likely as the rabbit not hating her.

“…what are you trying to do?”

“Ah’m barely sure mahself.” Red drawled. And Salad believed him.

“And you need me to do whatever it is?”

“Feels like lettin’ ya go like this is a mistake. Don’t ask me how.”

“W-why… do you want to go?” Shy asked. Salad felt her grip shake a little, as if she were contemplating whether holding on was right.

“…Am I in the way?”

“…I, um… if you were… would we be here?” Salad’s eyes finally opened, and she looked up at the other pegasus, eyes questioning in general.

“…what do you mean?”

“If… you were in the way, and you aren’t please don’t think that, then… wouldn’t Macintosh just… let you go? Or… Or would he have done that sooner? And then you would’ve got up and left.”

Fluttershy turned her head down and Salad found herself captivated. It took a moment to realize that there wasn’t a stare of any kind involved.

“Um… I’m here because I’d like to be. Macintosh… I don’t think he would’ve put us in this position if he didn’t want to be here too.”

“Nnnope.”

“And if it bothered you, you would just force your way up… right?”

“Y-yeah…”

“…what do you want?” Fluttershy asked. “I, um… I’d like…”

“If ya ask, ya might just get it.” Red said, and there was a chuckle in his voice. And Salad fell into thought, lowering her gaze and gently putting her head back into Fluttershy’s neck.

“…My…”

“Mm?” Fluttershy hummed. A gentle prompt.

And Salad, like she had been doing a lot lately, decided to take a risk.

“…Ivan’s not the reason my wing’s gone.” Fluttershy gasped, lightly. Red, who already had a general udnerstanding, simply waited.

“…it’s… my fault.”

“Ivan… what?” Shy sounded pretty lost, probably wondering where this had even come from. Salad pressed on.

“His special talent is combat. You both know that, right? We didn’t back then, but… it kind of makes sense now.”

“You don’t have to-“

“I do. You’re not giving me a lot of other options here. So shut up and let me talk.”

Fluttershy complied, holding Salad a little tighter. The scarred mare imagined that was her trying to apologize without saying anything. Either way, Salad still appreciated it.

“…I saw the first time Ivan got in a fight when we were in school. I was too young to fly, so I was still on the ground, since mom and Ivan didn’t have wings. I guess if I got older, I would’ve been sent to flight school for a few courses. I’m getting off track though…

“Ivan destroyed the colt who tried to take his lunch. Got in trouble for it, but Dad patted him on the shoulder and told him that sometimes fights just find a pony and there isn’t a lot to do about it except dig in your hooves and fight back if you can.

“…The second fight Ivan was in… he was protecting me from that same colt. That jerk decided to pick on Ivan’s little sister since he couldn’t beat Ivan. So Ivan nearly put him in the hospital. Ivan said later that he wanted to make sure that colt got the message. It… it was the first time I remember him not smiling at me. I was… young though. And stupid. Really stupid. I didn’t see my brother making sure I was safe. I saw an excuse to do whatever I wanted.

“I was sneaky about it. Most everypony knew who Ivan was after that second fight, and that I was his little sister. So I picked fights and if I couldn’t back my smack, I’d make it look like I was being bullied and call in my brother and he’d go kick in their teeth. It worked for a while. I was princess of the school. Then... well...

“One of the mares I was dealing with had an older brother too. This huge earth pony. Puberty made him a monster, and she called him in when I wouldn’t leave her alone. So he starts roughing me up and Ivan couldn’t hear me until I started really getting hurt.

“He tried to get him off me, but he got a good kick to the face and I’m pretty sure his mane hurt after that. I saw him get up shake the stars out of his eyes, and then I saw his horn glow and all I could think about was how satisfying it would be to watch this jerk get good and blasted off of me. Then everything hurt. And I think I passed out at some point.

“…Next thing I know, I'm in the hospital later. Ivan missed. I found out that… well you know what I found out. All I’ve got is a bit of a stump. I was told that I’d never fly. Mom cried. Dad looked like he wanted to bring down the building, or something. And… and Ivan…

“…I… I’ll never forget that look he gave me when he found out what he really did to me. It hadn’t really sunk in yet. The only think I really thought of was that I put that look on his face by being an idiot. I reached out my hooves and wanted to hug him, tell him everything was alright, but he ran out of the room.”

Salad paused a minute, and noticed that at some point, Fluttershy had started to cry. Even as she did though, her wings held tightly, and her hooves rubbed into Salad's back in a comforting way.

“I got out of the hospital later. I didn’t want to stay. I didn’t like the way the nurses were looking at me, I said. So they left Mom and Dad a set of directions to make sure I was cared for, since all the heavy work was already done by the time I woke up. I think some of them were glad I was leaving. Ivan was in his room. The door was locked. He said he didn’t want to talk to anypony, so we just kind of left him alone.

“I remember a couple days later, Dad had to use a key to get into his room, since he hadn’t been out to eat anything and stuff, and then he noticed his window had been left open and Ivan wasn’t anywhere to be found.

“He had the call out as soon as he could manage, but Ivan already had a head start, and we were in a big city, so there were all sorts of ways he could get out of the area. He told me a while ago that he stowed away on a ferry and just kept moving. Avoided the police and warders. Somehow managed to drop off the radar.

“…As soon as I was old enough, I told Mom and Dad I wanted to go out and drag his sorry flank home. They said I could if I could prove I could take care of myself. So… so Mom made sure I was fluent in Prench, since you know, that’s a good thing to know. I was already an awesome cook, and it’s really easy to find work doing that. As far as self defence, most bayonet styles needed two wings, so Mom and Dad both kind of worked together to teach me something unique. And I got a set of spiked shoes to help out.

“…some years later, here I am.”

“…why… I’m, I’m glad you told me, but…” Fluttershy asked with a sniff and a sob.

“How do you feel about Ivan?” Salad asked. “Tell me honestly.”

“…He’s… well…” Shy swallowed, and Salad started paying careful attention.

“…He… I think he’s the kind of pony who would run into a dangerous forest and nearly get petrified to save a bunch of fillies. I, um… think he’s a nice pony.”

“…Good.” Salad said.

“…um… why-“

“I can’t be with anypony who’d hate him for that.” Salad said. “Not even just friends.”

“O-oh…”

“…are you still crying?” Salad asked, when she looked up.

“A little…”

“…I don’t think I like making you cry.” Salad decided out loud. “Don’t let me do it again.”

“I’ll try.” Fluttershy replied, smiling just enough to convince Salad that the story might've been a good idea.

“And you. Red.”

“Eeyup?”

“You’re still a jackass.”

“Eeyup.”

Salad nodded, content, and lay her head back down on Red’s chest, nuzzling into Fluttershy’s throat.

“…S-so… what now?” the butter mare asked.

“Now I’m going to catch a little more sleep.” Salad said. “And then I’m going to wake up later, and wonder what the hay I just got myself into. You two probably want to do the same.”

“Eeyup.”

“That… sounds nice.” Fluttershy yawned, Salad could feel it. Red released his embrace just long enough to stretch out his limbs. Then he resumed holding the two of them, and it was almost like they had never awoken.

Wonder if Red thinks this makes him a pimp? Salad thought as she started to drift off.

…whatever. He’s probably just thanking his lucky stars or something.

Celestia knows why they’d want me in on this. They’re too good for me.

I’m… glad I didn’t meet them sooner. Probably wouldn’t have been able... to find him… if I had to leave them behind…

…should bake them something later… wanna keep ‘em…

…smell nice… wings’re soft… warm…

Friction

Chapter Twelve: Friction
or
It's Like A Megapony Piloted By Multiple Fluttershys

“Hey, bro, need advice.”

Ivan looked up from the pot he was stirring, since he had offered to help with dinner, and waited.

“…so I’m, uh…“

“…pregnant?” Ivan guessed.

“You’ve been spending too much time with dad. Also no.”

“Hm.” He sounded almost disappointed. Salad facehoofed.

“No, I’ve got a coltfrien-“

“Who.”

“Red.” Ivan, who previously looked to be calculating what possible accidents he could send a pony through the mail, softened up as he considered the admission. He shrugged. Salad supposed that meant she didn’t have to bargain for anyponys life. “…and…”

“And?”

“Well, I’ve also got a marefriend.”

“Herd?”

“Sort of... I kind of get the feeling we're just kind of feeling it out right now.”

“Ah.” He said. “…problem?”

“Uh…” There wasn’t a problem really. Actually, upon reflection, she had it a load better than she deserved.

“…how… do I keep them?”

“Work the shaft.”

“…Alright, there are two reasons I’m not kicking you.”

“Mm?”

“One is that you’re standing next to a stove and I don’t want to burn you.”

“And?”

“If you had sprung that on anypony else, I would’ve laughed my flank off.” Salad conceded as she chopped vegetables. “Seriously though. What do you do to make Cheerilee happy?” And though that question left her open for all sorts of double meanings, Ivan had his fun already and took her seriously.

Ivan paused a moment before he answered.

“…Love her.”

“…I don’t know if I can do that.” Said Salad. “It’s a… well…”

“Took time.” Ivan said. “Eventually.”

“Huh. Really?”

“Mm.” He said. “Don’t try. Won’t work.”

“…just let it happen?”

“Enjoy the ride.” He said. “Comes natural.”

“Like you’re some expert…”

“Pot and kettle.” He shot back. Salad sighed.

“…anything I could make Red? I’ll grill him later on maybe making something for Fluttershy, but I’d like to… surprise him with something.”

“Peaches.” Ivan said.

“…not apples?”

“Not predictable.” Ivan said, looking back at her. “Don’t start.”

“…so he likes peaches?”

“Yes.”

“Just making sure. I’ll see if I can find something interesting. You can maybe have first taste to make sure I get it right.” And Ivan appeared to already be looking forward to it.

“…is there a library around here somewhere?” She asked after a bit. “Cheerilee doesn’t have any cook books, and I want to try something new for the peach… thing.”

“Town Square. Tree.”

“…Oh, that huge tree? The library near it?”

“No. Tree.”

“…You’re bucking with me.”

“Never.”

“Alright, that’s a lie. You told me to work the shaft.”

“Works.”

“…I’m not talking to you anymore.”

“Kay.”

“…alright forget that.” She said after a few minutes. “So if I go into town, and there isn’t a library that is also a tree, I’m holding you responsible”

“Neat.”

“Don’t take me lightly. I’ll knife you.”

“Cool.”

“…I’ll ruin dinner.” That got his attention.

“…monster.”

“Don’t you forget it.”

“Ivan, I hate your parents.” Cheerilee said as she walked in the door.

“Why?” Ivan asked, looking almost like he was expecting this.

“Because your mom wouldn’t stop trying to see if I had the ‘soul of the warrior’ and wouldn’t leave me alone until I finally got fed up and bucked her in the mouth. Knocked out one of her teeth. After Colgate put it back in, your dad wouldn’t stop going on about how hot the whole thing was. Then they started bugging me about our sex life.”

“Yeah that sounds like them. Also mom doesn’t actually believe in the ‘soul of the warrior’, she and Dad probably just wanted to see where your breaking point was.” Salad said over her shoulder.

“…now I really hate them. The worst part is they aren’t letting me keep hating them.”

“Oh?” the stallion asked, eyebrow quirked.

“…well we talked a bit after that, because they wouldn’t really let me leave just yet, they told me how thankful they were that I was around for you when you needed somepony. Then they hugged me and said they’d always owe me for helping bring their son back to them.” Cheerilee frowned. “I think that whole thing with the warrior spiel was only because they knew they could say that and get out of trouble instantly.”

“…sounds like them.” Salad concluded. “Dad’s a professional troll and Mom just likes to have fun. You should’ve seen what they did to me.”

“Oh?”

“Well they kind of did this thing where they painted me as some sort of whorse out for Red and Shy’s respective plots and wouldn’t stop until I pulled out almost every dirty thing I knew how to say in Prench, which made Shy faint because somehow they planned it and knew she was bilingual and then… after… we…” Salad then came to the saddest realization of her entire life.

“…what happened?”

“…afterward we had a talk about feelings, fell asleep in eachother’s hooves, had another talk about our feelings when we woke up, and decided to give being a herd a try. I just realized that I owe the fact I’m dating two of the most attractive specimens in maybe all of Equestria to my borderline abusive trolling parents. Buck my life.”

“…yeah, you’re right, that really does beat what they did to me.” Cheerilee said. “Ivan, did they do anything to you?”

“Nope.”

“…you’re making it up to me later.”

“Gladly.” Ivan said, reminding himself to thank said trolling parents. All the cards seemed to be coming up him ever since they arrived.

…though the card that came up Salad getting a former model and Big Bucking Macintosh (if Mac wasn’t kidding, that actually was his middle name) was kind of a big one.

--

Salad stepped out of Cheerilee's house and into the afternoon sun, wondering to herself how sweet Red and Shy liked their dessert.

Here, it's almost as sweet as you.

Ugh. Cliche. If she weren't in public, she'd probably bang her head against a wall or something.

Besides, that wouldn't even work on Red. He was a guy.

I made a lot of this, and figured you might want some.

“Oh, good afternoon!”

No, that made it seem just a bit too much like she didn't care. The whole point was letting them know she did care while avoiding turning into some half-witted bimbo over the prospect of romance.

“Erm... excuse me?”

Hey, felt like doing something nice.

...but she just didn't do nice. They might think she was some kind of changeling in disguise or something-

“Oh, did you want something?” Salad realized that there was a unicorn in front of her, attempting conversation.

“Well, not in particular. A word, if you aren't busy.” White coat and violet curls. Also a good friend of Ivan's. The name escaped her though.

Something itched at the back of her mind. A warning.

...can't be any worse than Rainbow Dash.

“Eh, I'm not too busy as long as the library stays open.” She had pretty much everything she thought she'd need to make the dessert, no matter what it was. She hoped at least.

“We have ages, dear. I've actually been meaning to speak to you for some time now.” The unicorn smiled charmingly, falling into step alongside the scarred mare.

“Oh yeah?” Salad asked, tilting her head.

“Your brother and landlord are personal friends of mine. And from what I hear, you've been growing close to two other friends of mine.”

“Red and Shy?”

“Indeed.” She said, somewhat amused by the nicknames. “On that note, I don't believe we were ever properly introduced. My name is Rarity. It's a pleasure, darling.”

“Salad Shooter. Don't call me 'darling'.”

“Ah, my apologies.” To Salad's mild surprise, Rarity didn't look very put off.

“...You talked to them first, didn't you?”

“Best to consult the knowledgeable before traversing new ground. I was warned you might be a bit abrasive. Provided you don't intend to offend, we'll have no problems.”

“...well good, I guess.” One of the entire reasons she did it was because ponies a little put off were easier for her to deal with. Equal ground was something she didn't do often.

“Now, I was curious, what exactly sparked that brawl with Rainbow Dash?”

“You heard about that?”

“Though Fluttershy is far more qualified to be stitching wounds, she isn't the only one who knows how. Speaking of... what was that I heard about cleats?”

“I happened to be wearing them when that idiot jumped me. So I put them to good use.”

“Why ever would she do a thing like that?”

“Misunderstanding.”

“What about?”

“Things.”

“Involving...?”

“Stuff.”

“...Are you goi-”

“No.”

“...I begin to see the resemblance.” Rarity said with a sigh. “Ivan is much the same at times.”

“We haven't seen each other in ten years. How could we resemble eachother?” Salad asked.

“Some things, I find, are meant to be.” Well that would explain Ivan taking cues from Mom and Dad, despite their absence.

At the very least, he was taking the cues that wouldn't make her want to slice him tip to tail and ditch him in a ditch.

“...true that.”

“Are you free for tea? Perhaps we could find something you're actually comfortable talking about?”

“Ah...” Salad decided that, since Rarity was Ivan's friend, she should at least try nice. “Alright, gonna be honest here, I'm trying to figure out a good reason to let me say no.”

Baby steps. Technical progress?

“...I can't say I've ever been turned down so... directly before.”

“Yeah, it's just, I don't really know you at all, I get the feeling we have nothing in common, and I just think it'd be better for the both of us if we just pretended this never happened.”

“Goodness, you're acting as if I'm asking you to a lunch date.”

“So yeah.” Salad continued, ignoring that entirely, “We'd probably just spend five or so minutes talking about nothing, run out of nothing to talk about, and then it'd get awkward, and that's not really worth the trouble, is it? It's not you, it's us.”

“It really is a good thing there's nopony really listening in, there would be all sorts of misconceptions...” Rarity mused.

“...so, uh, bye.”

“Oh, before you go, I do believe there are one or two things we have in common.” Rarity said offhandedly, looking a bit devious.

“...and those are?” Salad asked skeptically.

“Fluttershy and Big Macintosh, of course.” She said with a smile. “Granted, I don't see him as often as I see her. However, one of my other best friends is his sister. I'm sure we could have much to talk about.”

...Her first instinct was spot on. This one was dangerous.

Yes, there was the temptation to get to know Fluttershy and Red better through Rarity, and then surprise them both by saying and doing the right things. Endear herself to them so it would take longer before they realized letting her in might be a mistake.

And for what?

Rarity was after something. Tossing that name around in Salad's head had her recall the other times she had seen this mare in greater clarity. A gossip hound was inviting her into her parlor.

She... possibly wasn't that bad, considering that she hadn't condemned Ivan after discovering his crime. The fact remained though that she was attempting to manipulate Salad into something, and whether it was good or not, Salad didn't dance to strings.

“...Pass.” She said, and Rarity's face fell. She probably hadn't expected another refusal.

...now that Salad thought about it, that moment was the first sign of Rarity losing her composure. It had been calm confidence up until an unexpected failure.

She expected all of what happened except for my saying no. Was this planned? How far back? How far forward?

...Paranoia started setting in, even if Salad herself thought the conspiracy idea was a tad ridiculous. But... it didn't seem impossible.

“...Might I ask why?” Rarity inquired, having made herself look somewhat detached. Salad took a guilty thrill at the sight of it.

I don't even know what your plans were, but they were totally foiled, yeah?

“I've got things to do. Talk to you later, maybe.”

“Indeed.” Rarity said, and they parted ways.

And as Salad made her way to the center of town, she wondered if she had done the right thing.

She snorted, shoving the doubt away. Whether it was right or not, it was safe.

--

Oh, what to do...

Rarity had heard a story here and there about the antisocial sister of her friend Ivan, sometimes involving some form of creative threat or whispers on her missing wing as if it wasn't something anyone could see for themselves.

Then one spa session later she had heard from Fluttershy that she had befriended the mare in question. Rarity admitted to a double take at the news.

She herself had planned to approach Salad at some point, given her attachment to Ivan, but somehow her totally-opposite-of-Salad friend had managed to get through that impenetrable shell first. And she was also uncharacteristically tight lipped on the circumstances that had allegedly made them friends.

Rarity did indeed have an ulterior motive to attempting afternoon tea with Salad. And that was to get to the bottom of something that didn't quite add up.

And, if Fluttershy were in danger somehow, she would deal with the mare in an appropriate manner.

--

Salad walked into the square, moving toward the tree. Sure enough, she could see a door at the base and windows here and there...

...Literal treehouse. Where were you when I was a filly?

There wasn't an open or closed sign, no hours posted nearby... and from what Ivan said, the librarian actually lived in it. So what did she do?

Just walk in? It's a library, yeah, but then it's also somepony's house. Would I get arrested?

...buck it, I can't be the first to make the mistake if this is wrong.

Salad turned the knob and walked in.

...that's a lot of books.

She had never actually been in a library before, given that involved going out into the general public more then necessary. Whenever she wanted a cookbook, she asked one of her parents to get one for her.

She ignored the fact that there was nopony around and browsed the titles. The door was unlocked, so there was probably somepony around somewhere.

“Oh, welcome!” Said a purple unicorn that had just walked into the large room.

Speak of the draconequs.

“Hey.” Salad returned as she moved her way down to 'C'. Seemed like a good place to start looking for a cookbook.

“...can I help you find anything?” Salad almost said no, but then she remembered that the sooner she found what she was looking for, the sooner she could leave and get working on whatever recipe looked best.

“...I'm looking for a cookbook. Desserts. Any hiding around here somewhere?”

“Oh, those are just over here...” The unicorn walked toward a part of 'C', drawing out a few tomes with magenta magic.

...why do I even know the word 'magenta'? I don't even think I've ever heard it said. Ever.

“Those'll probably do.” Salad said, glancing at the titles.

“Great! Let's get these checked out...”

“Hang on, I'd actually like to look at 'em first.” Salad said with a raised hoof. “I don't have room for three books in my bags.”

“Oh, alright. Table's over here...” Twilight floated the books across the room, resting them on the nearest table, and Salad nodded to her as she followed.

Alright, let's see what we got here.

...Peach Pie? I already made a pie. Next.

“So, um...” And the unicorn was still there.

“I'll call you if I want to take something out.”

Smoothies? I don't need a recipe to know how to throw stuff in a blender.

“Well, actually... you're Ivan's sister?”

“Forgot me already? Kinda thought I was memorable.” In order to make the unicorn feel extra awkward, Salad stretched her single wing for emphasis.

“Well, no, I didn't forget...”

Peach Bruschetta? Yeah, might work, but it'd be like I brought by a plate of hors d'oeuvres. Rejected.

“I, um... actually heard that you made friends with Fluttershy-”

“Alright, how does everypony know who my friends are?” Salad asked, beginning to get a bit irritated. “Rarity already cornered me earlier trying to get me to spill all the juicy details, not that there are any, and it's like everypony tells everypony everything.”

“Well, we are kind of a small town...”

“Oh, great, that means that I have to keep even more clammed up then I already am to keep my personal life a total secret.” Salad sighed.

“...Is this really such a big deal?”

“A lot of the jimmies rustlers aren't, usually. But at the end of the day, your jimmies are still rustled.”

Peach crisp gets an honourable mention, but... maybe I can find something better...

“I'm Twilight Sparkle, by the way. One of Fluttershy's best friends.”

“Salad Shooter.”

Alright, next book.

“So... what exactly are you looking for?”

“A recipe.”

“Do you like baking?”

“Sure.”

“...is... is this what you did to Rarity?”

“You're obviously the smart one.”

“Well I don't like to brag-”

“Good to know there's going to be no bragging.” Salad cut her off as she flipped a page.

...Peach and blackberry custard? Looks delicious and it's something different. This'll do.

“Hey, I'm gonna take this book out.”

“Do you have your card on you?”

“...it's always something...” Salad sighed. “Fine, this probably won't be the last time I'm here, is there a form or something I need to fill out?”

“Um... where did I put those...?” Salad rolled her eyes, and wondered if it would be better to just copy the thing down.

Just then a card floated by and set itself on the table in a green aura.

“Oh, sup Bro?”

Ivan shrugged in response as he approached.

“Oh, hello Ivan! What can I do for you?”

Ivan replied by taking out a book with magic and setting it on the table, open to a particular page. Salad didn't pay attention, instead wondering if it would be possible to get out before the librarian tried to pry into her personal life again.

A totally hidden trap door in the floor suddenly opened and out popped a pink pony with a frizzy mane.

“It's time for a party Twilight! Here's your invitation!”

The tossed card hit the lavender unicorn in the face and slowly fell to the floor. By the look on Twilight's face, she hadn't noticed despite it maybe hitting her in the eye.

“...Pinkie. We are going to sit down right now and you're going to tell me how there is a trap door in the floor of my library, where it leads, how you found it, and how many other ponies have access to it.”

“Okie Dokie Lokie!” Pinkie replied, climbing out of the hole. “Oh, but first, here's your invitation!”

“Thanks but no than-” Salad cut herself half way through her rejection when her eyes noticed something suspicious about the card. More accurately, what was written on it.

“...this is a party for me.”

“Yuppers!”

“...This... you're throwing a...”

“Are you shocked speechless? Is your heart about to grow three sizes?”

“Don't be so surprised, Pinkie throws a party for everypony at some point.” Twilight said, finally recovering from the shock of Pinkie coming out of her floor and picking up her own invitation. She was already looking forward to the party, ready to learn a new lesson about friendship and write a letter to-

The card read: 'Celebrating Fluttershy, Big Macintosh, and Salad Shooter finding happiness in eachother's hooves! B.Y.O.B.!'

“You...” Salad began, visibly shaking in anger. “...how... how many of these have you given out?”

“Just two...”

“Just these? Great, let me tell you-”

“...bags full of 'em!” Pinkie finished, grinning.

Salad nearly tackled the foolish pony down the trap door, out of sight of her chivalrous brother and the random librarian so that she could make sure she would regret taking her personal life and literally handing out invitations to strangers to come and be a part of it.

Regret it every second she spent recovering in the hospital.

But no. She had a creed of not throwing the first stone, and this mare was completely unaware that what she did made Salad want to commit murder. Also Ivan's reflexes were good enough that Salad might not be successful in the initial lunge.

“...do you realize what you've done?” She asked instead.

“I planned a party to celebrate two of my friends finding somepony special enough to jump into a big bowl of lovey dovey cake batter and try to bake themselves into something delicious and wonderful for everypony involved?”

“No.” Salad said. “What you did was take something that none of us wanted spread around because we're still bucking figuring it out, and gave two bags of invitations worth of random ponies permission to start sticking their noses into it.”

“...that's bad?” Pinkie's smile started to disappear as she began to realize just how angry she had made the one winged mare.

“Shy and Red are going to have to deal with a bunch of ponies invading their privacy. And then they're going to deal with a bunch of ponies telling them exactly what they think about them throwing in with a cripple like me. And I'm going to have to deal with a bunch of overprotective friends swooping down and trying to threaten me about things that everypony who isn't an idiot knows I wouldn't do anyway.”

“You're dating her?!” Shouted Rainbow Dash as she zipped in through an open window and right up into Salad's grill. “If you hurt her, I'm gonna-” Salad, having had quite enough of Dash poking her in the chest with each word (and really, everything up to that point in general), spun around and suckerbucked her in the face. Her space was invaded, and Dash was threatening her with physical harm. That counted as the first stone.

Taken by surprise, Dash flew backwards headfirst and hit a wall.

“Point bucking proven!” Salad announced as the chromatic pegasus tried to shake the stars out of her vision.

“Y-you... I...” Pinkie, in a state of shock, babbled intelligibly to herself as Salad turned to her, eyes cold.

“I'm going to go home until this blows over. And you are going to cancel this party and never talk to me again.” Rainbow Dash had recovered by that point, and was stopped an inch from Salad's skull by a green shield.

And Salad, unopposed, exited the library and jumped away.

“What the buck is that mare's problem?!” Dash growled when it became apparent Ivan wasn't going to let her pulverize Salad.

“Pinkie.” Ivan said, ignoring Dash. The party mare turned to him, still in a state of shock.

“Um...?”

“Told you.”

“But this isn't a welcome party! This is a party for two of my friends finding-”

“Told you.”

“B-but...”

“Needs this?” Ivan asked. Pinkie had surprised him once before, and he wondered if there was an ulterior motive this time.

But he was disappointed to see that she shook her head, on the verge of tears.

Ivan sighed.

“Cheer up.” He told her. “We'll fix this.”

“I didn't mean-”

“You wouldn't.” Ivan agreed.

“Is... is she always like this?” Twilight asked, having finally put aside the fact that the rude pony that had done a masterful job of brushing off every attempt at conversation she made was dating her incredibly emotionally fragile friend, and a pony who was reputed to be one of the most polite and honourable male specimens in existence.

How does that even happen? It boggles the mind! Romance can't possibly work that way in real life!

And she was getting off track again. She snapped herself out of it fast enough to catch Ivan slowly nodding.

“Not bad.” He said. “...Rough.” Yes, that probably about summed her up.

“She... I've heard a few things about what's been going on with her.” Twilight went on. “She hasn't... really been doing anything wrong. But because of that, she feels justified in dealing with it in any way she wants, whether it exacerbates the problem or not. Acting badly in a way that's hard to call her out on.”

“Mm.” Ivan nodded. He was about to add his own two cents when something occurred to him.

“...Rarity?” He asked Pinkie.

“Nope... I wanted to deliver hers last. She gets kinda loco in the coco about relationships and stuff like that... She'd spend the whole time trying to find out how I know every time something like this happens.”

“...so how do you-”

“Twilight.” Ivan interrupted the pursuit of scientific knowledge from the checkout counter, with the cookbook Salad had been looking through just before Pinkie happened.

“...Now?”

“Cooks when angry.” Ivan clarified. “Will help.”

“Well alright... Where did you put your card?”

--

Salad almost made it home. But even before she hit the ground, she noticed the front door was barred.

“Howdy.” Mac offered as he got to his hooves and dusted himself off. Fluttershy turned to see her, but avoided her eye.

Salad found it odd that her first instinct was not in fact to check if there was an open window she could leap into.

“...Hiya.”

“Pinkie find ya first?”

“...yeah.”

“Ah.” He said. “Well, c'mon.”

“Where are we going?”

“Fluttershy's cottage. If she'll have us.”

“Of course...” Shy murmured just loud enough for them to hear.

“Not like... I don't want to or anything...” Salad said, craning her head to see if she had been followed. “...but why are we heading way over there?”

“'Cause it's the most out o' the way place we got, we'll be the only ponies there, and neither of us want to see ya all locked up in yer room again.”

“...Good reasons. Lead the way.”

Minutes passed as they took the long way around, avoiding the town.

“So, what happened?” Red asked. “When Pinkie found ya Ah mean.”

“I didn't hurt her, if that's what you're wondering.” Salad said.

“Did ya hurt anypony?”

“...Dash popped in the window and started threatening me. I bucked her in the head.”

“Salad...” Fluttershy started, definitely disapproving.

“She was up again a second later, she was fine. I hit her way harder that one time we actually fought.”

Mac shrugged. It was the sort of thing that would probably be commonplace between the two.

“I was beyond angry, and Dash was trying to be the alpha mare.”

“How was Pinkie?” Mac asked.

“Buck, I dunno. She regretted it when I told her what kind of mistake she made. Wasn't paying much attention after Dash busted in. Left pretty much right after.”

“Fair.” Mac said. “Ya alright?”

“I...” Salad remembered the last time she had been in a mood like this. When he had asked her that and explained that he wasn't taking sides, just worrying.

She almost told him yes to stop his worrying, but the word was too heavy to force out.

...I don't want to tell lies to them.

“...No. I'm not.”

“Wanna talk 'bout it?”

“I don't know.”

“Well, say what feels right, or don't. We've got a walk ahead of us.”

“A-and... and you could, maybe, if you want to...” Fluttershy tried, fluffing and fidgeting her feathers nervously, “...spend... the night?”

“...Like... with you?” Salad asked, turning back to the trailing pegasus.

“Macintosh told me that... you, um, don't like to be around other ponies when you're upset. It's why we waited for you outside Cheerilee's house.”

“...so...?”

“If you wanted... you could take my bed for the night, and take a day away from town. It's very quiet. A-and... you wouldn't be all by yourself.”

“...I'll think about it.” Salad said. The offer wasn't anything but innocent, and it sounded worlds more appealing to staying within the town's limits and potentially having to fend off Dash again. Or... anypony, really.

A few more minutes passed as Salad spent a bit of time thinking. Her rage was all but gone, and she felt relaxed with her-

Friends? Lovers? Kindred spirits? Something else?

For now, she'd settle for friends until she was sure their arrangement was good to last.

Fact was, she was relaxed in their presence. And the thought of spending another night with at least one of them nearby after the earlier events sounded incredible compared to her original plans of locking herself in her room again and brooding for a day or so before work forced her out of hiding.

They just made the hard stuff easier.

...Ivan. I think I'm starting to understand.

“I'm... afraid.” She admitted quietly. She took a moment to steady herself now that she was letting it out, and Mac and Fluttershy waited patiently as the three walked.

“...She took something from me that... that was personal and just spread it around. I know that... herds aren't really uncommon, but they don't normally involve ponies like me. I made sure the party wasn't happening, but now a bunch of ponies know, and I'm pretty sure not a lot of them really like me.”

“Are you... afraid of how they'll treat you?” Shy asked as she inched closer to Salad's side, putting her between her and Red.

“No. I know how they'll treat me. But I'm afraid of how they'll treat both of you.”

“We ain't ashamed of ya.” Red said, eyes facing forward. “Trust us on that.”

“I do.” Salad returned. “But I don't want you to have to put up with any of what I have to deal with. Ever.”

“It'll be a problem eventually.” Red said. “But for now, we'll just pretend it don't exist until somepony decides to make it an issue.”

“...what then?”

“Then, they better hope they don't cross any lines.” Red said. “Ah don't take kindly to ponies who can't respect me or mine.”

“Nopony hurts my friends.” Fluttershy agreed, quiet as ever. And the conviction in her voice surprised Salad.

...Steel, when her friends are threatened. Her own words from a while back. She... wants to protect me. They both do.

How... what do I do about this?

Feathers spread over her back as Fluttershy pulled Salad into her side, leading her toward the cottage that had come into view.

Salad leaned into the other pegasus, thoughts starting and stopping short at random as she tried to find an appropriate response.

...I'll protect them too I guess.

Thinking Ivan was going to be the only real pony in her life was a little silly, in hindsight. If Ivan understood, why wouldn't others?

There were still all sorts of ponies out there that were going to give her a hard time. She would never forget about them. But for now, she was being taken to a place where they wouldn't matter, at least for a little while. And, at the risk of tempting fate, all that was ahead of her for now was an afternoon with two ponies she was starting to see a future with. Romantic or not.

Life was, for the first time... good.

...I give up. Let's see where this takes me.

Mac opened the door for them and they all entered the cottage. And Shy's feathers slid off of Salad's back as their host made her way to the kitchen, presumably to put the kettle on.

Salad took a moment while Red settled himself on the couch, and followed.

Salad had been in Shy's kitchen before. She'd made a meal, so she knew where Shy kept the things and stuff. Salad remembered the ingredients for that custard, and while it would be better if the recipe was in front of her, she was confident she could improvise and still make something tasty.

Given the hour of the day, it probably wouldn't be very long before dinner happened, and they were probably going to have it there.

Custard always took a while though. They would have to wait until tomorrow.

...But Salad had the day off work tomorrow. And an open offer to stay the night.

“Hey, Shy.”

“Yes?”

“I'm gonna make something. Can you stay out of the kitchen? I'll bring out the kettle and stuff when it goes off.”

“Y-you don't have to-”

“I know. What's your point?”

“...I, um... I guess...” Shy shook her head and smiled at Salad in a way that made her really want to get the custard right.

“Thank you.”

“Thank me after you get to try it.”

“I'm thanking you because you want to surprise me.” Shy said, still smiling. “Macintosh would thank you too. It feels nice.”

“W-well...” Embarrassment crawled up into her colored cheeks, and Salad wondered why. The fact she was doing this in the first place was to tell them she cared. She was succeeding.

...so why was she feeling so awkward?

“I-If you, um... j-just go.”

Fluttershy hummed to herself, amused about something. “I'll see you soon then.”

“Sure...”

...and now that she was alone in a kitchen, her kingdom, she could get to work. And deal with the mushy gooey stuff later.

--

About an hour had passed. Salad had taken a break for tea and smalltalk, but had returned to the kitchen soon after. Either whatever she was making was incredibly complicated, or she was working meticulously.

Normally thinking of either of those things would've made her go into the kitchen and try to make sure whatever pony that was going to that kind of trouble know that it wasn't necessary, but the longer she thought about Salad trying to please them, the more she wanted to smile and wrap herself up in the warm feelings it caused.

Thinking about a pony who was so... mean sometimes, acting the way she was, went a long way toward making her feel special.

When she had confessed this to Macintosh, he had agreed. And then he invited her to the couch he was lying on.

And she was feeling so good about herself and the turns her life was taking, she didn't even stutter more then four times when she said yes!

And so she found herself cuddled up on Macintosh's broad stalliony chest, just like several dreams she had and told nopony about except for that one spa day with Rarity and also that one time Rainbow Dash traded secrets with her (a tradition from flight school) but nopony else knew. And yes, it was a bit of an ordeal keeping her heart rate in control, but she was being so assertive and it was totally awesome!

Oh Rainbow Dash if you could see me now!

Actually no she didn't want that at all, not really.

Hoofsteps came from her kitchen, and Salad appeared in the doorway.

--

The scarred mare noticed what she had walked in on, and by the look of her, felt awkward about it.

“Done now?” Mac asked from under Shy. Salad nodded. “Well, what're ya doin' just standin' over there then?”

“Uh...”

“An' by that Ah mean why aren't ya over here with us?”

“I know what you meant, idiot.” She snapped, flushing.

“Well, mah chest is big enough for ya both. Ya should know, this won't be the first time.”

“...fine.” She said, walking over and looking over them. Where was she supposed to fit, the way Shy was spread over him?

“O-oh, sorry...” Fluttershy murmured as she tried to move for her.

“Just lift yer wing.” He said, and Fluttershy did, nudging over a tad. Mac took a foreleg off her back, and there was a place left for Salad to squeeze into.

Salad hesitated. A thought came to her that climbing in there would be the first actual display of affection she initiated.

...actually, might be the first since she was a foal.

“D-do you still...” Shy started when a few seconds passed, and Salad stopped her thoughts to better listen.

“...do you still think you don't have a place?”

“Can't see why she would.” Red drawled. “It's right there in front o' her.”

...I guess it is. Huh.

Another second to survey the place in question before she clamored onto the couch. Feathers slid over her back, and Red's foreleg wrapped around her, pulling her further in and pressing her more against them both.

Still tense, her head was up. And against her will, teenage filly thoughts started invading her head again.

I'm kind of positioned perfectly. I could kiss him right now.

...did he do that on purpose? Is that what he wants?

What about Shy? She probably wouldn't say no.

...assuming she can even say no to anything.

Maybe they don't really want that though, they weren't making out when I stepped in.

Maybe because they knew that I can't make up my bucking mind when it comes to them.

They're being patient. Should I kiss them anyway? Am I being a tease? I thought you had to be sexy to be a tease.

“Somethin' on mah face?” Red asked teasingly.

--

“What are you looking at? Something on my face?” Salad asked, as she tried to calm her racing heart.

The pony above her didn't reply, instead leaning her face down...

--

Salad grimaced as the memory unearthed itself, and she remembered why affection scared her. So she lay her head down in the crook of his neck, and kept her face hidden from view.

Besides, even if she could start something, if either of them didn't want it, they'd shove her off, and then she'd have to leave and it'd all be ruined-

Later later later I'll think about that LATER.

“Are ya alright?”

“Yeah.” She was telling the truth this time, aside from that reminder of darker times, she was doing just fine.

...describing it like that made it seem worse than it was. She was fine.

“You're awfully tense.” Shy noted from her side.

Oh it's nothing, just thinking on whether grabbing one of you and starting up some sloppy makeouts would ever be a good idea or not.

...huh, could we all make out with eachother? Like a threeway- oh Celestia now I'm thinking of threeways what the flapping-

“Yeah?”

“Are you stressed at all?”

“...Between my parents, what happened earlier, and general paranoia, maybe a little. It'll go away.”

“Would you like a massage?”

--

I'm being so assertive! Yaaay!

--

Yes. Salad's apparently bipolar subconscious piped up.

“No.” She said instead, in no mood to be put in a vulnerable position.

“O-oh...”

“Ya sure?” Red asked. “Mah sister had one once when she pulled a few muscles. Said Fluttershy's mighty good at it.”

“I'd rather not.”

“Ya don't know what yer missin'.”

“I'll survive.” And just in case Shy was hurt at all by the refusal, Salad raised her wing and returned her embrace.

“...Alright.” Red gave up. Pausing a moment or two before asking: “So, what were ya makin'?”

“A surprise. And dinner.”

“Y-you didn't have to-” Shy started, but Salad was having none of that.

“No. I didn't.” Salad said. “Egg timer'll go off when I've gotta take it out of the oven. And the surprise is in the fridge. It'll be ready tomorrow.”

“What's in the oven?”

“Food.”

“...Ah'm givin' up now.”

“You're learning.”

After that, nopony really had much of a desire to say anything.

--

Big Mac stood by the door hugging Fluttershy goodnight, and Salad stood by waiting for her turn.

And when it came, she found it unusual she had no trouble whatsoever walking up and wrapping her forelegs around his big neck.

“G'night Salad.” He said, and something sounded wrong about it.

...Ah. That's what it is.

“Call me Sally.” She said as she held him a little tighter and stroked his side with her wing, glad that from there, neither of them could see her flushing face.

“...Alright, Sally.” And she found she quite liked the way it sounded with his accent. And his voice.

And also the fact that he was saying it.

She released the hug after she was sure her cheeks weren't burning.

“Ah'll be back tomorrow after the work's done.” Red said, smiling. “Ah kinda want to know what ya made.”

Both mares nodded, and the stallion took his leave.

They stood there for a moment before Salad turned to Shy, avoiding her eyes.

“You can too.” She said. “If you want.”

“D-do you want me to?”

“Why would I offer if I didn't?”

“...Okay.” Shy said. Salad scoffed to herself.

She's acting like I just offered to take her to bed.

“S-so, I'll take the couch tonight, and you can take my bed.”

Aw hay naw.

“This is your place. Bed's yours. Which couch do you want me bunking on?”

“O-oh, no, I insist-”

“That would work, if you could out-insist me.” Salad said with a raised eyebrow.

Filly, please. You know this is a losing battle.

“B-but... the bed's better then the couch...”

“Yeah. It's why you're taking it.” Salad said over her shoulder as she trotted back into the living room. “Got a spare blanket somewhere?”

“Y-yes...” If Salad were paying more attention, she would've noticed how nervous the other mare had become. Shy was gone before Salad turned back though.

When the yellow pegasus returned, Salad was already settled into the couch.

“Thanks.” She said.

“S-sweet dreams Sally.” It sounded good from her too.

“Usually I do when you're around.” Oh my Celestia, worst joke ever, that sounded so cheesy what the flapping buck was I thinking-

Salad had her back to the mare when she snuggled into the blanket, so she wasn't prepared for Shy to lean in and nuzzle her fondly.

She almost scooted backwards into the embrace, but that would've caused her to fall off the couch. And she had made herself look stupid enough for the night.

...though maybe I should be cheesy more often.

Her marefriend's hoofsteps ascended the stairs, and Salad relaxed into her makeshift bed.

The blanket was warm, and every time she inhaled, it was like Fluttershy was right there with her.

Hope they like that custard...

...

...wait.

Salad opened her eyes and took a closer look at the blanket she had been given.

“...Celestia, Shy.”

A few seconds later, she was opening the door to Shy's room finding her curled up on a bed missing it's thick warm quilt.

Startled, she shrunk away from the Salad's glare.

“I'm going to assume since you didn't get another blanket for yourself, this is the only one you have.”

“U-um...”

“...Alright. Between the two of us, I will get the worse arrangement whether you like it or not.” She declared, leveling a hoof at the quivering pegasus on the bed. “I dare you to tell me otherwise.”

“...d-did... um... w-would...”

“Now take your bucking quilt and go to-”

“Would you like to s-share?”

“And how the hay would we do that?”

“...Share the... the bed?”

Salad blinked. She opened her mouth, decided what she was about to say was stupid, and closed it again.

Well DUH. Like, EPIC duh. Also I should've seen that coming a mile away.

“I... I won't take the only blanket and leave you in the cold.” Shy said. “I don't like thinking about that. Not while I'm wrapped up and warm. Not while you're in my house. N-not while...” She trailed off, shrinking back into herself while she awaited an answer.

...Well I did dare her to tell me otherwise.

...note to self, never dare Fluttershy to do anything again.

“...You're alright with that?” Salad asked, uncertain. “Don't lie to me.”

Play it cool. Don't act like you just got invited into your mare's bed. This is possibly your last chance to actually wear some pants in this thing.

“You... would you... force me to take the blanket for myself?”

--

Assertive levels are off the charts! Captain, what do we do!?

What would Rainbow Dash do?

...we don't have nearly enough swagger for that.

Plan B! Just go with it!

--

Salad took a deep breath.

And she sighed, defeated.

I am so whipped.

“Fine, we'll play it your way.”

--

Yaaay! A thousand times yaaay!

--

Salad jumped up onto the bed, and spread the blanket out.

She lay down, facing away from the mentally cheering Fluttershy.

It's not like we haven't slept together before. This is nothing new.

A minute or two after they had settled, Salad felt a tentatively searching hoof on her wither.

Salad waited a moment as it moved back and forth, as if Shy wasn't exactly sure of what she wanted to do.

Slowly, Salad moved backwards into her waiting forelegs.

“Just ask next time. Or take.” She said. “No real reason I'd say no.”

“...Alright.” She nuzzled into the back of Salad's neck, and enveloped her in feathers. “Goodnight... again.”

“Night, Shy.”

So comfortable was she, that she had completely forgotten about the trouble she'd have to deal with the following day.

...maybe I should sleep over again sometime. This is nice...

Sunlight

Chapter Thirteen: Sunlight
or
Alphabetically Anatomical And Apocalypticly Atrocious

Angel, for the most part, kept to himself while the pink mare was around. Even if he didn't like her, the mare cared about his mother. She was as kind and thoughtful as she could be around her.

So Angel tolerated her. As Salad had managed to defeat an enraged Mr. Grizzles (whom was at least twice the size and weight of most ordinary bears) by herself, unarmed, she was currently the most dangerous in the area.

Aside from Angel himself, of course.

That fact aside, he still spent time calculating and plotting countermeasures to the mare just in case she stepped wrong. Mr. Grizzles would gladly get involved again if that were the case. And Angel could rally the rest of the animals on a whim, but that might result in casualties, which would cause his mother to cry.

Which wouldn't do.

A knock sounded from the door, and since mother was still resting, Angel answered.

Rarity and Rainbow Dash were at the door, in the middle of bickering about something.

“...but why wouldn't she tell me?”

“Because you go crazy when there's shipping ahoof.”

“I would have taken her seriously!” Rarity cried. “Fluttershy hasn't had... well any relationship that I've ever heard about. Do you know?”

“That's private.” Dash said. “Look. My point is, it's not that we like you any less that we keep these things from you until later. We try to keep them from Pinkie too, but she's just better at unburying secrets. Can't you just leave stuff where it is if nopony is willing to talk about it?”

“But I do!”

“...say what?” Dash asked, squinting.

“Nopony ever tells me 'no'! They just dance around the issue like they're embarrassed, and that normally means they want me to pry it out so they don't have to come clean on their own! Never once has a pony ever been frank with me and just said 'no'! Well except for Salad, and I did intend to leave the relationship alone for the most part, I just wanted to evaluate her to see if she was good for our dearest Fluttershy!” Rarity stamped her hoof, heaving as she tried to catch her breath.

“...um... wow. Really? I thought you were just butthurt because you weren't in on the loop.”

“Well, anypony would feel that way. At least a little. But I can at least set aside my own feelings for things that the ponies I love want to keep to themselves. I've only recently found out that everypony treats me like a slavering beast whenever issues of the heart come up. Granted I do get a little... excited, but...”

“...aw, geeze Rare, I'm sorry. I had no idea. It was just kind of like 'there goes crazy Rarity again, trying to surgically remove secrets from the brains of her victims-'”

“How dare you-!”

“I just said I was sorry for thinking that! Really! Look, come here.” Rainbow reached out a foreleg and pulled her startled friend into a hug.

“I'm sorry it took so long for us to see that we were hurting you. Come on, after we talk to Shy, we'll go talk to the others and write a letter to the princess. Sound good?”

“...yes. Yes I rather would like that.” Rarity smiled and returned the hug. And then they noticed that Angel stood watching them impatiently.

“...Huh, how long has that been open?” the pegasus asked

“I admit I'm not sure.”

“Hey buddy.” Dash greeted. “Sorry about that. Fluttershy around?”

Angel pointed up the stairs toward his mother's room.

“Huh. Still sleeping?”

The bunny nodded, and stepped aside.

“Eh, she's sleeping in. She probably won't mind a good morning from us. C'mon Rare.”

“If you say so. If she's vexed though, the blame falls on your shoulders.”

Though Salad tended to have his mother's best interests in mind, Angel still disliked her quite a bit. As such, he felt no guilt whatsoever over throwing her to the wolves like this.

He wondered how they'd 'evaluate' her character after entering the room.

--

Rarity wasn't prepared to find the mare she was out to protect, and the mare she was out to protect the aforementioned mare from occupying the same room.

She expected even less to find said threat playing the little spoon in Fluttershy's fores and wings.

Salad was wrapped up and being snuggled like a teddy bear, and she seemed to be quite content with said arrangement.

Fluttershy was nuzzled into the crown of Salad's mane, also quite content.

Rarity's mind reeled.

By the look of it, they may have fallen asleep this way, meaning that Fluttershy reached out and held her. Which implies that Fluttershy is the dominant personality.

...which... is... somehow possible?

Rainbow Dash could do nothing but gape at the fiery, uncontrollable, rude, violent mare, tame as a kitten in the grip of the sweetest and kindest pony she had ever even heard of.

Dash pointed.

“I know.” Rarity whispered.

Dash lowered her hoof, said something that could barely pass for shocked squeaks, and pointed again.

“Yes, I know.” Rarity whispered.

Salad stirred in her sleep and Fluttershy's eyes cracked open. She didn't notice that she and her bedmate weren't alone in the room.

Fluttershy hummed happily, still half drunk on sleep and the position she found herself in, and kissed the back of Salad's neck, hugging her closer and stroking her with her wings.

And Salad whimpered and melted against the other pegasus, and tried something that might have been turning around to better embrace Fluttershy.

Dash frantically pointed, mouth hanging open as the two intruders took in a scene that was entirely too intimate for an audience.

Or at least an audience that hadn't paid for the show.

“Oh my Celestia, I know.” Rarity gasped as she started to feel entirely too much like a voyeur.

Fluttershy apparently heard the additional voice and went rigid, slowly lifting her head, eyes wide in panic.

Salad moaned her protest as the TLC stopped abruptly and started to wake herself to find out what the holdup was before the rest of her brain kicked in and convinced her to get the buck out of dodge before she embarrassed herself or something.

Then Salad saw Rarity and Dash.

It took a moment. Rarity could see the gears turning behind those grey eyes. Those first few milliseconds as the eyes took in the scene and attempted to process what it was they were seeing. Identifying the factors.

Narrowing as Salad realized something was wrong with the picture, and a few more milliseconds as she tried to figure out what exactly it was.

Recognition. Eyes widening in horror.

Then blinding uncontrollable rage. Bared teeth, wing at full mast, feathers spread, and the breeze seemed to grow the slightest bit more turbulent as pegasus magic started to move and gather it.

Gnashing teeth parted and had Rarity had the presence of mind to move, she may have covered her ears.

The entire event took one single second. Rarity had read somewhere that the mind sometimes takes in more information during near death experiences.

Was this how superheroes felt?

And then she heard it.

--

“Well done Scootaloo, you didn't touch a single side!”

“You sure I need to know this to make stuff?” The little pegasus asked as she raised the face shield and turned away from the now extinguished welding torch.

“But of course! How do you think I got where I was today?”

“...building stuff that you didn't even know what it was at first in a dark room with a bunch of unsafe tools?”

“In my case, it was my mother's basement, and I was by myself. You get to do it in a well stocked workshop with a responsible genius overseeing your activities.”

“...well I guess that kind of rocks, bu-”

“!!!”

“...did... did you hear that?” Scootaloo asked quietly over the sound of several terrified birds fluttering from the trees, looking up at the now paralysed-with-fear Jerryrig.

“I tasted that.” Jerryrig replied in a whisper.

--

“I will kill you both!”

For a moment, Rarity glimpsed the reaper, reflected in murderous grey eyes.

“Save me Rainbow Dash!”

“Tactical retreat!” The unicorn felt the sensation of having her hooves knocked out from under her. A brief moment of weightlessness and then, held in Rainbow's fores, she was rocketing toward Ponyville at quite a good speed.

“Oh no please don-” Flutttershy tried, but Salad had gone to a place that none could follow.

“Waaaaaaaaaghhhhhhhh!!!”

--

Rarity saw in the distance a pink streak blast off through the window. And it was gaining.

“Rainbow, faster!”

“Alright, no. You do not tell me to mo-”

“Stop running so I can rearrange your organs in alphabetical order!”

“Right, faster. Got it.”

Rainbow Dash was certainly not scared of the threat behind them, but whenever a pony was that mad, it was best to get out of her way.

The fact she was moving so fast had nothing to do with the fact that alphabetically, appendix came before brain.

Alright Dash. You've got an incredibly pissed off pony on your tail, and she has legit reason to want your guts for garters.

Why do I know what garters are?

Stupid Rarity.

Right, plan. I'm protecting Rarity, can't just fly out of reach and hang out on a cloud. Yes you get to cuddle a hot pony to keep her on said cloud, but then Pinkie would find you and join in and you would get crushed under sexy flank.

And that's only number four on my list of ways I want to die. Why settle for less then one?

“Rainbow, she's frothing at the mouth-”

“If you keep running, you're only going to die tired!”

Right, plan, need one. What can stop Salad?

Fluttershy is back there, turning around is risky with another pony, and seeing poor Shy will probably remind Salad to keep trying to kill us. Also she's probably panicking. That too. Best to leave her to Angel right now.

Ivan? I dunno where he is right now. And if I happen to find him in Cheerilee's room, I really will die. And then Salad will kill us again while we're corpses that can't run.

...wait. What else did that invitation say?

“Got a plan, Rare! Hold on tight!” Dash put on a burst of speed and pulled farther ahead of the crazed mare.

--

Big Mac tossed the last bit of corn into the wagon and made to hitch himself to it when he heard screaming.

“...Salad?” No, he supposed it was 'Sally' now. Still, it reminded him of that one noise of concentrated bloodlust he and probably everypony else in town heard a few minutes ago.

Did that mean that was also Salad?

“Mac ya gotta help us! She's out of control!” Rainbow Dash yelled as she landed nearby.

“What'd ya do this time?”

“No time to explain just stop her! She's going to do to us what she did to Mr. Grizzles!”

Big Mac followed the pointing hoof and saw a pink blur coming closer.

He sighed.

Salad landed nearby and angled sharply, moving at a speed that Dash herself would've accepted as 'not bad' toward her two targets.

“Nnnope.”

Salad stopped on a dime.

“Come the buck on Red! You don't know what they did!”

“Tell me then.”

“They snuck into Shy's room like a couple of perverts and just they were standing there watching us!”

“...beg pardon?”

“And, and, they were just standing there, and they saw Shy...” Salad blushed hotly, trailed off, and found herself unable to elaborate further. Big Mac took this opportunity to make irresponsible use of his imagination.

In lieu of an actual explanation, Salad instead flailed a hoof wildly in the direction of the two criminals.

“They saw!”

“It's not like we went in there to see any of that!” Dash protested. “We just happened to walk in on something we shouldn't have!”

“Then why did we even catch you in the first place?! Why didn't you turn around and leave when you saw?! No, I had to chase you outta there!”

“Of course we ran, you tried to kill us!”

“So you would've stayed?! Thought we'd start charging by the hour?! Spread it around and throw a bucking party why don't you! I can't imagine what Shy's going through righ-” Salad's eyes widened fearfully.

A second later, she was blasting off in the direction she came from.

“Whew, thanks Mac, I don't know how we would've gotten out of that without a fight without you.” Dash said, wiping the sweat from her brow with a laugh.

“No trouble.”

“I suppose we'll be off now. Give our reg-” Rarity was cut off when Bic Mac turned his eye off of the retreating Salad and toward them.

“Nnnope.”

“...Excuse me?”

“Salad,” He began, deciding that 'Sally' was a private name, “fell outta the sky an' accused you two of bein' peepin' toms. And while ya said it wasn't yer intention, she said some mighty incriminatin' things, and neither o' ya denied anythin'.”

“...what's your point?”

“Mah marefriends might'ave bin wronged. It's yer turn to make yer case.”

“You can't be serious.” Dash said. “You think we would do that?”

“You tell me.” He said. “Ah don't think ya would mahself, but there's stuff here Ah don't know. And Ah'll need to tell Salad somethin' to make sure she don't come after ya again.”

“...could we tell you later?” Dash asked, wondering how powerful Big Mac's stern gaze was compared to Fluttershy's stare.

“Nnnope.” The Stare was probably magical, and probably unmatched, but hay if the stallion didn't give it a darn good try.

Darn good.

“...Ah.” the pegasus replied, wondering how to start. Thankfully, Rarity took the reins.

“We had intended to speak to Fluttershy about that business with the invitation, but you told us to wait until the following day so that you might attempt to calm her and Salad down, yes?”

“Yeah?”

“A short while ago, we were let in by Angel and found Fluttershy in bed with Salad. And... I admit that the scene of Salad doing something that wasn't scowling or threatening was... shocking. So much so that we may have stared for a a few moments too long.”

“Moments? How long exactly?” Mac asked.

“We weren't even in there for half a minute!” Dash said. “They just happened to wake up and then Salad tried to make our insides our outsides!”

“Well then.” Mac concluded, easing off the pressure. “Ah suppose Ah'll see 'bout clearin' this up next time Ah see 'em.”

“...couldn't you go now?” Dash asked. “I could totally take her in a fair fight, but she doesn't do fair fights.

“Ah've got a farm ta run.” He replied. “After Ah'm done, Ah'll head on over an' see what's what. Odds are she'll be there an' this can get nipped in the bud.”

“I suppose we'll leave you to it then.” Rarity said. “You haven't broken a promise to me yet.”

“No ma'am.”

“Ugh, fine... but if I get stuffed and mounted over the fireplace, you totally owe me a barrel of cider.” Dash said as she and the unicorn walked off, probably to barricade themselves somewhere while it all blew over.

Macintosh redoubled his efforts to get everything done. While before, he was motivated by whatever surprise Salad had made the previous day, now he had other work to be done. One of his girls was a time bomb and the other was probably a wreck.

...It'd probably end in another cuddle fest. He liked those.

It would later be acknowledged as one of the fastest work days of his life.

--

Salad touched down at Fluttershy's doorstep and took a second to steel herself.

This was the last chance to wear some pants in this relationship. Here. Now.

There was absolutely no way she was going to out-steady Mac, and Fluttershy was constantly serving her (and it bothered her how much it didn't bother her that this was going on) at being steady despite being in pieces half the time.

And yes, her first and foremost goal here was to make sure she was alright after putting up with a pair of voyeurs whom she was going to gut later (Red would cave eventually, this was serious), but it would end with her actually not being the bottom rung.

...not that she actually felt like a bottom rung, but it kind of stung that her two lovers seemed to be, on a regular basis, blowing her mind, picking up the pieces, and putting them back together into something slightly better every time. It stung mostly because it felt like she was doing absolutely nothing for them in return.

But in that innocent looking cottage was her chance to finally give something back.

Another moment to take a breath and plan out things she could say, and...

“Oh, welcome back. Would you like some tea?”

“...um...”

Shy was seated at the table enjoying brunch. There was actually extra set out for Salad, and a place made at the table.

...that meant that Shy didn't spend much time, if at all, being a wreck. She got out of bed and made sure there would be something to eat and drink while they talked about what had transpired.

Alright. What.

“Hang on, shouldn't you be like, falling apart right now?”

“...s-should I be?” She asked. “Am I acting... wrong somehow?”

“No, you're acting like what happened before didn't bother you.” Salad continued. “Like, at all. What the whating what?”

“Um...” She paused, demurely setting down her tea cup and looking back at her timidly, one eye shielded by her mane.

Hnnnnggggg.

“Stop being cute and tell me.”

“Cute?”

Buck. Divert attention. “Ignore that. Talk.”

“Well... Rarity and Rainbow Dash are two of my best friends.” She said. “It was very embarassing being seen in a position like that, but... they wouldn't just go out and tell anypony. It'll be a little while before I can look them in the eye, but it could be... worse?”

It was rational, thought out, and a realistic reaction to what happened. Salad felt foolish now for expecting otherwise.

“I'm more worried about you.” Fluttershy continued, settling herself off her chair and walking toward her. “You were ever so angry, are you feeling better now?”

“...are you real?”

“Your voice sounds strained. Did you yell too much?”

“Well, yeah, I was kinda out for blood.”

“Oh. Well some tea with honey sounds like just the thing I think. And I probably have a lozenge or two somewhere...”

“W-wait.” Salad said, holding up a hoof before Shy could dote on her any more than she had. “You're seriously alright? You looked terrified earlier.”

“Oh I'm fine. It took a few minutes to calm down, but this isn't even the most embarrassing thing I've been through. Far from it really.”

“And you're totally alright with those two just walking in on you- wait, what were you even doing back there?” Flushing against her will, the thoughts of what might've been if they weren't interrupted started dancing through her mind.

“O-oh, you didn't like it?” Fluttershy asked, now starting to look a little less alright with life. “I-I thought you did, since you like cuddling, and you seemed very receptive-”

“Wait, no, that's a tangent, buck that, we're talking about you.” Salad wanted to avoid that subject like the plague before it reduced her to a stuttering mess. “I, just... didn't think you'd be this alright with what happened.”

“...I suppose I'm not really the most...” Fluttershy trailed off, now a little depressed and Salad wanted to bang her head against the wall for successfully doing the exact opposite of what she set out to do when she returned. “A-and I, um... maybe I shouldn't have... in the bed...”

“No, no, I liked that, just-”

“Y-you did?”

“Yes!” She yelped a bit louder than she meant to. “I, I just... wasn't expecting that. At all.”

“U-um...”

“Yeah...” And it was the most awkward moment they had shared yet.

Alright, buck this. I need some time to think.

“Hey, Shy, I'm gonna go.”

“W-what?”

“And you are not going to think it's your fault.” Salad ordered. “Because it isn't. If it was, I'd tell you.”

“T-then why-”

“I just want a bit of time to myself. I like what you did, I like that you're alright, and I like you, so don't assume that I'm doing this because you stepped on a landmine I'm not telling you about.”

“...a-alright.” Shy said, still looking crestfallen. “Will you come back?”

“...yeah.” She replied. “Yeah, I definitely will.”

“Alright.” She gave a small smile, turning her head up to look at her. “I'll, um... see you soon.”

Hnnnnngggg.

“See ya.” Salad slung on her bags, still sitting by the door from where she had left them the previous night, and departed.

Once outside, Salad jumped.

Unlike most other times she did so, however, she decided to instead practice something she had been trying to get the hang of for some time.

Once she reached the apex of her leap, her wing spread, and she began to glide. Sort of.

In her own right, she had become quite skilled at air manipulation. So instead of constantly hitting the ground and jumping again, or dashing in mid air, she instead attempted to ride the wind as it churned around her.

When she and her father had come up with it, he had called it 'a wonky cross between gliding and sailing.'

It was a far cry from flying, and she had yet to get good enough at it to actually gain height while doing so, and it would probably be tiring as hay once she managed, but it was self improvement and it felt good as she noticed she was better than she was.

Maybe if it became an actual thing, she could stick her name on it or something.

She finally touched down near Twilight's tree. Her form of glide was a slower form of travel than her regular jumping, but she wasn't in any hurry to go anywhere.

She pondered for a moment, and entered the library.

“Oh, welco- oh my.”

“Hey.” Salad greeted as she walked in. “As far as I'm concerned, that elephant in the room is going to stay ignored.”

“Bu-”

“Ignored.”

“...alright.” Twilight agreed uneasily.

“I just want to get that library card form out of the way. Then I'll be gone and you can pretend I was never here.”

“...if you say so.” Twilight agreed as the form floated out on magenta magic.

The reply hadn't been negative at all. Twilight agreed because she didn't know how else to respond.

So at the very least, there was no bad blood between her and the librarian. This was good.

“The party's been cancelled.” Twilight said at one point.

“What did I sa-”

“I am ignoring the elephant.” Twilight replied. “There's other stuff I could be talking about.”

Salad huffed and went back to her form.

“Why are you telling me that?”

“So you know that a bunch of ponies won't be gathering in one place and gossiping about three other ponies who'd be absent.”

“...fair enough.” she conceded, as she signed her name. “So, here.”

“I'll have your card tomorrow. If you'd like to take a book out now, you could bring it back when you get your card?”

“Isn't that against the policy or something?”

“Small, easy going community.” Twilight said with a smile. “Policy only becomes necessary if a pony makes it necessary. “

“And you think I won't?”

Twilight shrugged. “I trust Fluttershy.” She returned. And Salad decided that was best left alone.

“Well... I'm not really in a reading mood yet.”

“Alright then. You should know though that Ivan took out that one cook book you were looking at earlier for you.”

“He did?”

“Said you might want it.” Twilight said. “In case you didn't get what you needed from it.”

“...Good to know.” Salad said, nodding. “See ya later.”

“Good day.” Twilight said as she returned to whatever she was doing when Salad entered.

The scarred mare shielded herself from the sudden glare of the noon sun with a wing for a bit as she thought about how easy that all had been. She honestly expected worse, given that the last time she was there she emotionally destroyed one of her friends and bucked another into her wall.

...come to think of it, why wasn't she getting flak for that?

She considered the possibility that nopony involved thought that any part of it was her fault, but decided not to get her hopes up.

“Please wait.” Another voice said from behind and Salad had a slight case of deja vu.

She turned to see oh sun kill her kill her kill her-

“What do you want?” Salad demanded, deciding that even Mac would be proud of her self control at not ripping Rarity in half.

“To apologize, actually.” Rarity said. “Please believe that I do in fact feel terrible about what happened.”

“Hey mare that's great, so can I go now?”

“...well I was actually hoping I could make it up to you.” Rarity continued.

“And how would you be planning on doing that?”

“By making you a dress, if you'd like.” the unicorn said. “I'm really quite talented at it you know.”

Salad couldn't help but laugh a little.

“Wow, no. The thought of me in a dress is just that depressing.”

“So depressing that you laugh? Truly?”

“I don't think I have to tell you why a dress wouldn't work for me.” Salad said, now notably less amused.

“I'm afraid you do.” Rarity answered. “I'm quite puzzled.”

“Dresses are for pretty ponies to look prettier. I'm not pretty.”

“Wrong, on both counts.” Rarity said. “A dress is meant to accentuate what is already there. I'm quite sure I could make one that would suit you quite nicely.”

“What, exactly, is there about me that needs accentuating?”

“Your mane.” Rarity answered without missing a beat. Her eyes roamed over Salad, and the pegasus found herself suddenly feeling naked. Which was ironic in ways that made her want to bang her head against a wall.

“Then shouldn't I go see a manedres-”

“Your eyes.” Rarity added.

“That's so cli-”

“Your face.” She cut off. “Your coat. Your legs. Your tail. Your plumag-”

“My plumage? Really?” Salad growled, but stopped when Rarity didn't back down in the least.

“Yes, your plumage.” She said. “I will not pretend that your scars are something beautiful from any point of view. However you look at them, they ill suit you. But no matter how one side looks, I don't see how that makes your remaining wing any less impressive.”

“...What?”

“I have an eye for wings.” Rarity said. “Two of my best friends have very fine pairs. I can at least recognize when wings are well cared for and strong.”

Salad unfurled her wing and looked it over. Yes she preened on a regular basis, and yeah her wing got a work out doing the work of two (or at least as much as it could manage), but she couldn't quite see what Rarity was getting at.

“Silver, I think.” Rarity noted as she looked Salad over. “To bring out your mane and eyes. And black to compliment the silver, and the pink of your coat. An understated design. Your personality would clash with too many frills and lace.”

Salad wondered if this was the first time a pony looked at another pony and dressed them with their eyes.

“Would you like to see what I see?” Rarity asked, a gleam in her eye. “My boutique is nearby. A short walk. And I can see the dress clearly. It wouldn't take much of your time.”

Salad, despite herself, was curious.

“...Fine. But this had better be worth my time.”

--

Salad stood on the platform, having been measured, and had fabric and ribbons pinned here and there.

Rarity had thanked her for being so still, mentioning she wasn't exactly used to such co-operation. Salad wondered who would be stupid enough to squirm and shift while a pony was handling pins and needles nearby.

It was when Rarity started to sew in gemstones that Salad raised an eyebrow.

“I thought you said frills and stuff didn't suit me.”

“They don't. These gemstones however, do.”

“...Don't suppose I'd understand if you explained why?” And Rarity paused, as if writing her response out in her head before replying.

“After you left us at Sweet Apple Acres, and I parted ways with Rainbow Dash, I had gone to see your brother.” Rarity said. “I was overdue for a visit, you see. And I had questions I wanted to ask.”

“About what?”

“About you.” She answered. And Rarity paused for what was probably effect.

“Please understand.” The unicorn continued. “I wasn't sure at all what to make of you. The first time we met, you threatened that one pony with his life when he endangered your brother and a set of fillies. Granted, I was quite prepared to do the same. Probably the only pony who was not was Pinkie Pie.

“The second time I met you, I invited you to tea. This was after you had built up a reputation, mind. And suddenly you were friends with Fluttershy, a pony who I could not see enjoying your presence one bit.”

“Fair enough.” Salad agreed while Rarity continued working.

“I thought so. I offered tea so that I might get to the bottom of you, so to speak.”

“Never before the third date.”

“Charming.” Rarity deadpanned. “But no. I was concerned you were not good enough for her.”

“Yeah?”

“Yes. However, I've reached a conclusion.”

“And what would that be?” Salad asked, rolling her eyes.

“Whether you are good enough or not isn't a concern anymore.” Rarity stated, straightening her glasses as she straightened up from where she had knelt, and moved to another side of the dress. “What matters now, is that Fluttershy herself is quite happy with you.”

“...Is she?” Salad knew that she should have phrased the question differently, disguised her tone, she knew she had given something up the moment she said it. And if Rarity was paying attention, she now knew how worried Salad was about the subject at hand.

“Forgive me for bringing up the no doubt ghastly memory, but when I saw her holding you... The way she smiled when she kissed you and drew you closer, yes, she was quite happy you were there.”

“A lot of ponies are 'happy' when they're not alone in bed.”

“Are you accusing Fluttershy of baseless lust?” Rarity asked sternly. “I think you're so convinced of the contrary that you're grasping at straws instead of acknowledging that you're worth the trouble.”

“Watch it.” Salad growled.

“There is a difference between genuine affection and lust.” Rarity said, ignoring the last comment. “And from what I saw, though lust might have entered the picture at some point, it had not at the time. And you know this.”

“You know.” Salad said, patience wearing thin. “I think I asked about the gems. What was the point of the story and psychoanalysis?”

“Context, dear.” Rarity said as she stepped away. “The gemstones are alexandrite. A personal favourite of mine. Have you heard of it?”

“No. And don't call me 'dear'.”

“Alexandrite is a particularly rare stone.” Rarity said, walking toward the window. Salad looked down at the stones now decorating her dress. An odd mix of pink in some places and green in others. Pretty, she admitted.

“And you sewed them all over this?”

“I did. They suit you.”

“And why's that?”

“Have you wondered what makes it so special?” Rarity asked, as she flicked off the light switch. The room was dark, except for what little light shone through the drawn curtains. “Alexandrite changes, based on what light shines on it. Only showing it's true colors in the right conditions.

“I might have caught a glimpse of yours.” Rarity said. “There, in her embrace, you were just as happy. I imagine Big Macintosh inspires a similar reaction, and you in him. I hope not to find out for sure in any similar way, but it's what I think.”

“...and?”

“I look at you, Salad, and find it difficult to know what to make of you. Several sides that make little sense and contradict the others. And I would consider myself privileged if I could get to know you so that I might be able to try and decipher it. You are an interesting mare, Salad. And by Fluttershy and Big Macintosh's choice, you are one of worth. So I ask you...”

Rarity drew back the curtains, and the sunlight spilled through the window and onto the platform that Salad stood on, blinding her for a moment.

“What are your true colors?” Rarity finished as she wheeled over the mirror. And Salad took a long look at herself.

Her mane wasn't brushed, still a little messy. And she wasn't freshly showered, or ready for a night on the town or some social gathering like the dress might hint at.

However, the black indeed made the silver and her pink coat stand out. And the silver shimmered in the light.

Glittering green with a hint of blue gemstones, a beautiful shade when she looked at them closer, decorated the dress just enough to be noticed, but few enough not to distract from the rest of the package.

The dress was backless, to allow for her wing. And it also left her scarred side bare.

Just as if I were any other pegasus.

The colouring of those scars didn't clash with the dress. It felt like they mattered less with what she wore, even if they weren't hidden.

All in all, she barely recognized the pony that stared back at her.

“...this is what you saw?”

“Exactly what I saw.” Rarity answered, a triumphant smile on her face. “A dress accentuates what is already there. It isn't something one can truly hide behind. What you see here was always there. Perhaps I wasn't the first to notice, I think. Have Fluttershy or Big Macintosh ever once hinted they thought you were ugly?”

“I... no, I don't think so...”

“I will ask you to leave the dress here.” Rarity said. “There are still one or two alterations that need to be made. Fear not, it will look almost exactly as it does now. And you'll have something nice to wear if the relationship ever leads you someplace, ah, how did Applejack phrase it? Frou-frou.” Rarity tittered to herself over what was undoubtedly a private joke.

“...Thank you.” Salad said. Rarity, not realizing the significance of Salad actually thanking anypony for anything, waved it off.

“Not at all, darling. I was compensating for my blunder, remember?”

“...I'm not thanking you for the dress.”

“Ah.” Rarity said, expression softening. “Even still, no trouble, not a bit.”

“Yeah?”

“Whatever else are friends for?” the unicorn asked, looking over the rims of her glasses.

“I think...” Salad mused, looking back at the mirror. “...that I'm starting to find out.”

--

Minutes later, Salad left the boutique and, for lack of any better places to go, made her way toward the farm.

Mac would probably still be around, and she had a story to tell at the least.

On the way there, she spotted an orange pegasus flying clumsily around Ivan's tree. The stallion though was nowhere to be seen.

Scootaloo hadn't noticed her, despite the pink of her body probably standing out amongst the grass around them. Salad approached, watching Scootaloo attempt a loop.

She saw the moment where Scootaloo's mistake caused her to fall out of balance. Corrective manoeuvres made it worse, and in a second she was spinning out of control.

Salad leapt, and landed.

“I-Ivan?” the foal asked from her back, before slowly opening the eyes she had shut in fear of the fall.

“Not quite.” Salad answered, shrugging Scootaloo off her back and back onto her hooves.

“Aw, why did you have to save me?”

“Nopony else was around.” Salad said. “The alternative is crashing into the ground and maybe breaking one of those wings.”

“Nuh-uh! Wings are stronger than that!”

“Not at your age they're not.” Salad answered. “So this is a pretty weird way to say 'thanks for saving my butt'. Is that how the kids are saying it nowadays?”

“...Sorry. Thanks.” the foal muttered, making Salad raise her eyebrows.

“Anytime, kid.”

“You mean that?” Scootaloo asked dubiously. “You're kind of mean.”

“The real monsters are the ones who'd just watch a foal take a spill when they could do something about it.” Salad said. “I'm not nice, yeah, but I try not to be a monster.”

“...Good job so far.” Scootaloo said, avoiding her eye.

“Out here by yourself?”

“I was learning science stuff from Jerryrig. Then he heard 'The Roar Of Tartarus' or something and locked himself in his room. So I came here.”

“Huh.” Salad said, looking up at where the little pegasus had been practising. “So, what was that supposed to be?”

“A loop.”

“Thought so. That's a little advanced for you.”

“Well Rainbow Dash can do it. She was doing Rainbooms at my age!”

“Kid, from what I hear, a Rainboom is just flying really really fast. Not everypony can probably go that fast, but anypony can try that if they've got a decent stretch of sky and not get hurt. A loop is a whole different bag.”

“How would you-” Salad at least credited the foal to know when she was about to misstep when she was talking. Recent events though had left her feeling indulgent. That and Ivan liked the little pegasus, so she'd let her live.

“Pretty sure Cheerilee could tell you that. And she's about as far from pegasus as you can possibly get.”

“...So what do I do?”

“Start with easier stuff. Before I lost my wing, I heard that when foals practice tricks at flight school, they get a huge bed of cloud so there's something soft to land on when they fail.”

“...we don't get a lot of cloudy days.” Scootaloo said.

“Well, your teacher is the one in charge at the weather station, right? She might have something planned at some point if she's going to do it properly. Ask her sometime.”

“...maybe I will.”

“Seriously though, Dash didn't teach you how to do a flip, did she?”

“Well no...” Scootaloo said.

“Then she probably didn't intend for you to actually try it. Otherwise she would've walked you through it. She's an idiot, but she isn't stupid.”

“Don't talk that way about Rainbow Dash!”

“I call 'em like I see 'em.” Salad replied, stretching her neck. “So, wanna learn something different?”

“...um...”

“I know what you want to ask. Go ahead.”

“Well...” Scootaloo said, fidgeting, “...what could you teach me?”

“Well, to use her as an example again, Cheerilee teaches you stuff without any wings.”

“...Well I kinda thought you were talking about flying. But you wouldn't know about that, right?”

“You'd be surprised.” Salad said with a slight smirk. “Half the stuff I could teach you though might get the schoolteacher mad at me for corrupting the youth though... but there's a few tricks I started learning when I was about your age.

“I can't really teach you much about proper flying, yeah, but I can teach you how to move. You do that on the ground or in the air.”

Scootaloo seemed a little sceptical, so Salad sharply raised her wing.

The air swirled for a moment, enough for Scootaloo to notice.

“I know that Dash mentioned taking off. You've seen her do it all the time. You think she does that just by flapping her wings and going from zero to ramming speed?”

“...well yeah I kinda did.” Scootaloo answered. “But she said something about a trick to it.”

“Pegasi have magic too.” The foal nodded in understanding, and Salad continued. “And you can learn how to use it conciously. It's how the weather ponies make tornados and use lightning. It's how you can make a springboard out of the wind-” Salad took this opportunity to crouch and jump a good distance past where Scootaloo had been flying before, up into the air.

And she coasted lazily back down, not quite as graceful as a leaf, but similar. She was showing off like an attention whorse, and floating down was a lot more difficult than the half job she had been doing beforehand, but somehow she managed to pull it off.

“...and take off.” Salad finished. Scootaloo started to get interested.

“...and you can teach me that?”

“It's pretty hard for beginners.” Salad said, speaking from experience. “And a lot of it you might not even really need, since you can actually fly. But it doesn't hurt to know. And being good at magic helps make you a stronger pegasus.”

“How quick did you pick it up?”

“I don't even remember.” Salad said. “I just practised, and I don't even remember when it became second nature. I'm still getting better even now.”

“...huh. How do I get started?”

“Well that's the thing.” Salad said, scratching the back of her head. “We can't really get started yet.”

“...what a gyp.” Scootaloo said, starting to turn.

“First you need to feel the difference between flying and not flying.”

Scootaloo turned back, and she didn't need to say a single thing. Salad knew what she said sounded incredibly stupid to the little filly.

“Alright, here it is. You're using magic to fly. You know that, right?”

“Yeah?”

“Well, do you feel magical when you do it?”

“...huh?”

Salad chuckled. Scootaloo sounded a lot like her when her dad was attempting to teach her the same lesson.

“You need to feel the difference between you using magic and not using magic. Once you've got that, you'll know when you're doing it right when you try other stuff.”

“How do I do that?”

“Keep flying.” Salad said. “But pay attention to yourself. Then land for a little while and try to find the difference.”

“'Kay, then what?”

“Play with it.” Salad replied, shrugging. “If you know the feeling, try to use it on the ground. Try to move the air around you like I did before. You remember, right?”

“Well yeah.”

“Once you've got that, just keep playing with it, without overexerting yourself. Once you're good enough, I'll try teaching you how to take off if Dash doesn't.”

“...alright, cool.” Scootaloo said. “Thanks.”

“Eh. No problem. Now climb on.”

“...why?”

“Getting high up off the ground is hard when you're at your stage. I'll take you up just this once.”

“Alright.” The little filly jumped up, and Salad poised herself for a leap.

“Hang on. And then let go when I stop going up.”

“You really think you need to tell me tha-AAAAAAAAAaaahhhhhhh?!” Salad ascended rapidly, and she felt Scootaloo's hooves slip off as she started to fall.

She hit the ground, shook out her limbs, and looked back up at the now gliding filly above.

“No more flips!” Salad yelled up at her. “I'm leaving, so you might not get caught next time!”

“I'll be fine!”

Salad watched the foal lazily circle, probably now trying to detect the magic lifting her wings. Then she turned and left. Sweet Apple Acres awaited.

--

“Well, howdy there.”

Big Mac turned at the sound of the familiar voice. “Howdy A.J.. That trip work out for ya?”

His sister chuckled to herself. “Ya might say that.”

Mac smiled, and took a moment to look his sibling over.

She was wrapped up in a brown traveling cloak, bags slung on over them. The cloak and stetson almost reminded him of Ivan. It made him wonder just how far she had traveled.

“Anythin' interestin' happen?”

“Let's just say Ah'm not sore at ya about that one trip ya took a while back no more.”

“Yeah?”

“Ah understand, is all.” He supposed that meant that he wouldn't be hearing much about the trip itself.

“Good ta know. It hurt not tellin' ya.”

“Ah get that.”

“Anythin' ya can actually tell me?”

“Well...” Applejack trailed off, and Mac surmised she was trying to figure it out.

“Ah'm involved.” the mare said after a while.

“Me too.”

“Well shoot, we both missed that?”

“Funny how the world works itself.”

“That it is.” Applejack replied with a laugh as she settled herself down under an apple tree.

“Anypony Ah know?”

“Ya've never been introduced proper.” Applejack replied smoothly. “But she an' I weren't strangers.”

“Can Ah meet her?”

“Only if'n Ah can meet yer sweetheart too.”

“What, both of 'em?”

The mare slapped the ground with a laugh. The earth shook for a moment, but neither decided to mention it. “Ya didn't!”

“Not really.” He said. “Ah helped. In the end, we all did.”

“Both mares Ah hope.”

“Eeyup.”

“Well good. If me and mine are good for the road, ya'll make enough kin fer the both o' us.”

“They'd be good moms.” Mac said.

“They couldn't be half the parent that ya'd be.” Applejack said. “If'n ya raise 'em half as good as ya helped raise Applebloom.”

“Not really done with A.B. yet. Still time ta screw up.”

“As if ya've ever screwed up in yer life.”

“Might be overdue.”

“If there's anythin' Ah know fer sure...” Applejack said in a moment of seriousness, “It's that when ya have a choice between screwin' up and doin' good when it's important, ya buck a house clear in half. No smart foal would ever ask for a better father. An' no foal ya raise is gonna be dumb enough.”

“...Thanks.” He said, unable and unwilling to keep to himself how satisfied the compliment had made him feel. “But Ah think we mighta got a bit off topic.”

“Well, if'n ya're gonna be like that...” She said, still smiling. “Ya can say hello. Meet, uh... Overcast.” Applejack said, shifting her eyes to the side.

The orange mare gestured behind Mac, and he turned to see one of the lovliest mares he had ever set eyes on.

She was tall, slender, white coat, and a pair of pristine wings. Her pink mane curled up near the bottom and framed her fair face. Her cutie mark was a sun, half hidden by clouds.

“Pleased ta meet ya ma'am.”

“Likewise.” She smiled good naturedly. “Your sister has told me much about you.”

“Good, Ah hope.”

“If your reputation precedes you, I'd enjoy talking at length with you very much sometime.”

“Ah'd have to.” Mac replied. “Ah'm curious as to how mah sister landed a mare like you. Normally she ain't that lucky.”

“Well she didn't do so by being as charming as you.” Overcast replied.

“Well,” Applejack interrupted, “Ah've shown ya mine, so where's yers?”

“By the moon, what the buck did I just walk in on?” Salad said as she approached.

“Howdy Salad.” Mac said. “Just in time.”

“For what?” She replied, only to narrow her eyes as the cloaked pony under the tree got up and looked her over.

“...really?”

“Eeyup.”

“...this one o' those 'hidden depths' things?”

“Eeyup.”

“Huh. Well thanks to her,” Applejack said, nodding her head to Overcast, “Ah kinda got an appreciation fer those.”

“You're Red's sister, right?” Salad said, probably quashing something much more rude.

“Eeyup!” The mare responded, holding out a hoof. “Name's Applejack.”

“Salad Shooter.” They shared a firm hoofshake, eyes locked as they studied the other.

“Ya're involved with mah brother?”

“Sure am.”

“Do him wrong and Ah'll bury ya deep.”

“Fair enough.”

“Who's the third?”

“Fluttershy.”

“Expected that. They've been skirtin' 'round eachother for 'bout a year now.”

“Still are sometimes.”

“Do her wrong and same applies.”

“Also fair enough.”

“Ah like ya.” Applejack said, releasing the hoof. “To the point. S'nice.”

“I know that feeling.” Salad replied. “Nice to know you say what's on your mind, with tact too. More ponies need that.” Applejack nodded and turned back to Big Mac.

“Ah approve, fer now.”

“Eeyup.” Mac returned with another nod. “So, are ya back now?”

“Still got a bit o' trip left. Jus' passin' through.”

“Good. A.B. misses ya somethin' fierce.”

“Ah'll be seein' her soon. She been behavin'?”

“Granny's been keepin' her in line. Most o' her time's bein' spent with her friends. Ivan watches after her sometimes. Good hooves all round.”

“Good ta hear.”

“Oh, Red.” Salad said. “I saw Fluttershy earlier. She's doing alright.”

“Ahh. Glad ta hear that.”

“Also saw Rarity.”

“...mm?”

“I didn't kill her.” Salad said with a bit of pride. “You totally owe me an apple.”

“Ah'm guessin' there's a story there?” the stallion asked, ignoring the disbelief on Applejack's face and the amusement on Overcast's.

“...sorta.” Salad answered, shuffling awkwardly. “So yeah, just wanted to say everything's alright.”

“That's good. If'n ya wanna head on over there, Ah'll be along pretty quick.”

“Nah, I'll help you finish up. Gotta spend some time with you too.”

“Ah'm 'bout finished, actually. Just gotta put some stuff away.”

“If I can't help, I'll wait.” Salad insisted. “We'll go together.”

“...if ya want.” Big Mac said, scratching the back of his head. “Grab an apple an' Ah'll be right with ya.”

“Sounds good.” Salad said as she wandered into the orchard.

“...She considers not killin' Rarity somethin' worth a pat on the back?” Applejack said.

“Today's been full.” Mac replied. “Good ta see ya Applejack. Stay safe.”

“You too.” She said. “Now Ah gotta find Applebloom.”

“Try Twist's.”

“Thanks.” Applejack bumped his hoof with hers, and turned to leave. Overcast followed after a parting nod.

Mac turned back to the barn.

Not long now...

--

“Hey, ya see a book 'round here?” Mac asked about ten minutes later, as he rounded the barn's corner to where Salad was waiting.

“Sure have.” Salad said, not looking up from said book. “Informative little thing, isn't it?”

“...Eeyup.” Mac replied.

“Thought you'd go to the library and get a manual to handling pegasi?”

“Seemed necessary after ya nearly took mah head off.”

“That was like, years ago.”

“Couple months, 'bout.”

“Whatever.” Salad said, rolling her eyes. “Actually kinda flattering.”

“Ah don't much care for makin' ya mad.” Mac said. “No sane pony would.”

“Well now I'm flattered.” Salad said with a smirk, closing the book and balancing it on her wing. “You know, there's a whole chapter on foreplay in there.”

“Eeyup.”

“Read that yet?”

“Nnnope.”

“...huh. Most guys'd just skip to that.”

“There's more to a mare then a pair o' wings she might not have.” Mac said, looking her over in a way that nearly knocked the wind out of her. “Ah don't need a road map to the rest o' ya.”

“...I-is that right?” She said, locked in eye contact and unable to do anything about the blush flooding her face.

“Eeyup.” He said, chuckling. “Maybe Ah'll show ya someday.”

“...here.” A flick of her wing threw the book at him, and he deftly caught it in his teeth. “Go put that away, I'll wait out front.”

“Eeyup.” He said, stifling a laugh as he went.

--

“So, you talk to all the mares like that?” Salad asked.

“Some. Not many.” Mac replied. “Usually not more than one at a time.”

“Usually?”

“Well, there's you an' Fluttershy now.” He said. “Haven't been with two before.”

“Mm...”

“Got the jitters?”

“No.” She lied.

“That's good. Was worried Ah crossed a line.” He totally knew she was lying. Horsefeathers.

“I'd let you know if you did.” Salad said.

“Hope ya would. Ah kinda want ta keep ya.”

“You do?”

“Wouldn't be with ya if'n Ah didn't.”

“...Well then.” Salad said, hopping up onto Mac's back. “If you want to keep me, then carry me.”

“Sure.”

“You're gonna let me walk all over you like that?”

“Might be a problem if ya weighed anythin'.” He easily replied. “Or if Ah didn't like ya this close.”

She said nothing for a bit, instead wrapping her fores around his neck.

“So.” He said after a bit. “Full day?”

“Yeah. Got a library card. Rarity made me a dress.”

“How'd that look on ya?”

“Tell me when you see it.”

“Eeyup. Anythin' else?”

“Spent some time with Scootaloo.”

“Mm?”

“Stopped her from breaking a leg or something and taught her something safer to practice.”

“Awful nice o' ya.”

“She's gonna be family soon.” Salad said. “So I want to like her.”

“Ah thought ya didn't care.”

“...I changed.” Salad replied softly, resting her head alongside his.

“Eeyup.” Mac agreed, slowing his pace a bit for a smoother ride.

The sun started to dip toward the horizon. And Salad closed her eyes and enjoyed his warmth and the gentle sway as he walked toward the cottage.

Once they got there, Shy'd probably ask them about their days. And she could tell a story or two.

'What are your true colors?'

She wasn't quite sure anymore. They were shifting every day.

There was probably some kind of metaphor about how the ponies in her life shed light on her, but no, she couldn't bring herself to care about flowery tripe like that.

She was more looking forward to finally serving that custard she had made the other day. She knew they'd like it.

Then maybe another sleepover with Shy, and Red. She'd be over the whole sexual intimidation thing by then.

...hopefully.

Ponysue 2; Son Of Ponysue

Chapter Ice Cream: Ivan's Natural Colors Are Red And Black. And White. And Silver. And REALLY Black.
or
More Like Acsextance, Amirite?! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

...Also Yes, I Did Another One. Wanna Fight About It?

The clouds parted and the sun rose.

The light of the heavens fell upon the home of one schoolteacher, by association only. For the light was instead heralding the rise of the greatest protagonist ever conceived by the mortal mind.

What lessons would he learn? What lessons would he teach? (you know, since he's a couple steps down from perfect, also meaning he's not a ponysue because he's not actually perfect)

If the sun knew, it shared no secrets, only shedding it's light silently.

And so the day began with-

“Guess again bitches!” Shouted one Salad Shooter as she kicked out the door.

(INSERT GUITAR RIFFS HERE)

“Alrighty, now that I've got my own story, gotta do some awesome shit.” Salad said taking out a checklist. “Let's see here...”

“Be a total douchebag bitch to half the population, check...

“Cause bodily harm to Fluttershy, the patron saint of good will and intentions, check...

“See the Windfish, oh god how much did we have to pay to get that guy for the guest appearance?” Salad shook her head, putting away the list.

“Hal! Hal, I'm talking to you, ya greasy motherfucker! If I had to take a paycut for a Nintendo cameo, you had better start sucking my dick or I'm gonna have to-”

“Salad, you're breaking the fourth wall!”

“No, breaking the fourth wall would be referencing that guy behind the computer monitor covered in Dorito crumbs, dried Coca-cola, and shame.”

“I should give you a paycut for that!”

“If you cut my pay, I cut your junk.”

“Shutting up ma'am.”

“Ballin'. Glad we understand eachother.”

“Swivel on it bitch.”

“Oh, where'd you learn that one? Was it last night? When you heard me ordering your mother to-”

“I'm ordering you to do your damn job before I have to pay the editing team anything more than a mint because some entitled pink cripple doesn't do second takes.”

“Boy are you gonna be surprised when you start your car...” Salad muttered under her breath as she took the list out again.

“Right then, seduce the united internet's waifu, and stupid sexy Flanders... double check...

“Gain the ability to actually swear, shit-titty-sprinked check...

“...Alrighty, there's only one thing left to do before I surpass my brother and steal him away from the homewrecking purple whore.” She concluded, stuffing the list back into her... black inventory hole.

“Is it stop giving the director grey hairs?”

“No!” Salad replied to the voice that shouldn't have been speaking. “I need to find a date to the dance!”

“...Wait, is that in the script?”

“It is now!”

“Since when did this become a highschool AU?”

“No, it's too late to do one of those.” Salad said. “So this is like, the... hoe down? Is that what they'd do out here in the boonies?”

“I guess so, but what makes you think that this highschool bullshit is what we need?”

“Dude, have you seen the Naruto fandom?”

“...Carry on.”

“With gusto.” As if on cue (it totally was on cue), a pony came out of nowhere and nailed a poster advertising said hoe down to a bulletin board that had always been there shut up.

“Ahem.” Salad cleared her throat. “Gracious! A social gathering that my character hates! I'm totally repulsed by the idea of going at the moment! All I'd need is for some nice pony to express interest in taking me to this shindig to change my mind and make me cry happy tears brought on by acceptance! Can anypony spare a cup of love and tolerance?!”

“...no, because you are different than us.” Said another pony, reading cue cards offscreen with all the acting ability of an Austrian action movie star. And the accent of one too. “Now I and my fellow ponies will glare at you until you go away because that's how real life works.”

“Well then!” Salad said. “Since my character hasn't been chickified yet, that means I get to respond to your prejudice with gratuitous violence!”

Then Salad beat up like eight stunt doubles.

“Hey, gratuitous violence is against the law!” Shouted a cop with a name that probably some form of pun.

“They started it!” Salad countered.

“Fair enough.” The cop replied as he/she (the author hasn't decided, whatever) shuffled offscreen.

“Alright, need a date. Who does the author like right now?”

“Hang on, you're already dating two of the best ponies!” Said someone.

“Yeah, but they're like so last season. Also the difference between two and three is one and that's barely anything! They won't mind me bringing another in to join the herd. You know, as long as they're hot.”

“...Are you normally this shallow?”

“Do I look like a pony that'd be more concerned with inner beauty and personality?”

“Yes!”

“That's what you get for judging a book by it's cover.” Salad said triumphantly. “Aseop outta fucking nowhere!”

“That's the wrong aseop!”

“It would be if you didn't judge based on appearances you assface.”

“You are like the worst role model ever!”

“Still better than Rainbow Dash.”

“You know...” Mused a third voice. “At this rate, they're going to get the idea that the author hates Dash.”

“He totally doesn't.”

“Fo' sho'.”

“Indeed.”

“Alright, all of you shut up in there.” Salad said, knocking her own head a few times. “Right then. List of hot ponies... Let's start at the top, Celestia?”

“She's taken.”

“Ugh, fine. Luna?”

“Taken.”

“Ditzy? Wait no, she's a creepy voyeur. How about Rarity?”

“Taken.”

“Twilight?”

“Taken.”

“Octavia?”

“Taken.”

“Vinyl?”

“Taken.”

“Pinkie Pie?”

“Taken.”

“Gilda?”

“Taken.”

“Fuck! Applejack?!”

“She was taken last chapter!”

“Lyra!?”

“...You're good! All clear!”

A mint green pony walked up from offstage, waving at the studio audience.

“Heeey! Anyone see any humans?”

“I'm angry at everyone! I need acceptance!”

“Sorry, fresh out.” Lyra said. “See, I just came from that hotel over there.”

“...who got all your acceptance?”

“Your parents.” Lyra said. “They took it all...” She sighed, dreamily, as she limped home.

“...Well shit.” Salad said. “Where am I gonna find acceptance now?”

“Here, I've got a spare.” Lyra called, tossing back a hotel room key.

Salad stared at the key on the ground for a few horrified moments, before shrugging, taking it, and trotting toward the hotel.

--

“Gah!” Shouted Salad as she woke up in a cold sweat. “Oh god I think I'm gonna be sick...”

“Land sakes...” Big Mac groaned sleepily from one side. “It's three in the mornin', ya gonna do this every night?”

“Seriously...” Growled Ivan from her other side, tightening his foreleg around her body and pulling her closer...

“Am I gonna have to make it up to you?” Salad asked, shifting to get more comfortable as she-

--

“Gah!” Shouted Salad as she woke up, somehow not disturbing Fluttershy or Big Mac on either side.

She had a few moments of reflection, breathing heavily, before she brought a hoof to her chin in thought.

“Hmmm...”

Fading Scars

Final Chapter
Fading Scars

...Why am I not over it yet? Salad thought to herself depressingly, a few weeks later.

Several things had transpired. Some mundane but welcome, like a picnic with the two, and them surprising her after work by showing up and walking her to a home cooked meal at the cottage (which had apparently become their default hangout, what with the quiet area, cozy atmosphere, and large bed).

A few other things, like getting to Pinkie Pie and clearing up the whole mess. Apparently none of them had thought that Salad was totally responsible, and even Rainbow Dash wasn't really put out about the whole kick-to-the-head thing.

By then, Salad was mellow enough to agree to perhaps the smallest party Pinkie had ever thrown. A letter was apparently written to Princess Celestia, possibly with an invitation, and Salad was very grateful that the ruler hadn't shown up.

Having somepony like that around when Salad herself was so knowingly not nice with strangers would've been nerve wracking.

All in all though, Salad had a problem.

The relationship was still awesome. Sometimes it was like she was dreaming on the Surf Harp again. Occasionally she'd still get angry, but they'd both put an end to it, talk out their problems, and then they'd be gone in a flash.

...making up was down, but Salad had yet to even kiss either of them.

Fluttershy was paranoid about trying anything again. It might've had something to do with how it had ended the last time, with a critically enraged Salad chasing two of Shy's best friends clear to the farm intent on cold blooded murder. It might've had something to do with how jittery and tense Salad noticeably got at the very mention of anything remotely close to intimacy. Might've even had something to do with how Salad had to get out and think about things after the first failure.

Hay, she might've even felt guilty attempting to cross a line without Red present.

And Red seemed completely unwilling to push the envelope while Salad was in such turmoil about the whole thing. Of course, that also meant between him, Shy's sudden indecisiveness, and Salad's inability to commence higher brain function once things began to steer toward the subject at hoof, they were all at a standstill.

Salad had mediocre experience in such things, and that was putting it charitably. Throughout her life, she had only been kissed a total of twice. Her first was stolen as part of a dare on the playground when she was still on her pre-disaster rampage, and the unlucky pony who had committed the crime had gotten Ivan sicced on them in short order.

The second had been several years later, in school. An earth mare had been bet money that she couldn't seduce the even-more-unruly-at-the-time pegasus, and it hadn't ended well when the truth had come out.

Then two more attempts were made that Salad overheard planning for, and she gave up on friendship altogether.

There had been others that remained ambiguous. Some of them had either been good actors... or, as Salad was beginning to now realize was possible, totally sincere. It was a risk she had been unwilling to take though. She had to grit her teeth and force herself to other trains of thought whenever what could've been popped into her head.

Soon after that, she had left home, convinced that Ivan was her last hope for a pony to potentially trust.

So... how can I expect to do any of it right?

She was spending a day off helping Red finish up at the farm, hoping to the sun that she'd have a chance to sort through her misgivings before either of them tried anything again.

What's even my bucking problem? I can barely remember the last time I actually slept in my own bed. Or alone, for that matter.

“Thanks.” Red said as he finished putting everything away. Salad nodded absently.

If only I could stop thinking about that time whenever things start heating up...

“Ya alright?” He asked as they walked back to his house.

Oh, it's nothing, just trying not to think about the thing that finally broke me whenever you or Shy want to kiss me. Or do just about anything that's above a hug. You know how it is, I'm sure.

Am I going to have to be mostly asleep again before I'll actually bucking relax?

“Fine.” She managed to force out. This wasn't something she wanted them to know.

“...Goin' anywhere?” He asked, thankfully dropping the subject.

“Are you trying to get rid of me?”

“Ah'm wonderin' if'n ya wanna stay fer dinner.”

“Red, I've cooked for you for the past three days. We're going to have words if you start taking it for granted.”

“Actually, Granny wanted ta meet ya.”

Oh buck, family. Salad thought with a start.

“See, she already knows Fluttershy.” He went on, oblivious to Salad's sudden apprehension. “But she hasn't heard a thing 'bout ya at all. 'Cept how Applebloom thought ya were the most sour apple she'd ever met once ya arrived. And how Ah apparently know better.”

“...yeah?”

“She normally cooks the meals. A.J. Ain't half bad in the kitchen, an' Ah can survive, but last time we tried to take that from 'er, we got hit with a ladle.”

“So I shouldn't help? At all?”

“Prolly best if'n ya give 'er a chance to get used to ya.” He said.

“Well, that gives us a couple hours with nothing to do.” Salad said. “Any ideas?”

“One or two.” Mac replied. “Feel like a nap?”

“Wouldn't heading on up to your room past your little sister and granny into your room, and I assume we'd close the door behind us, seem a little...”

“Ya know Ah'm smarter than that.” He said with an amused snort.

“I'm waiting for you to prove it.”

“Over here.” He said, turning toward the barn.

He nudged open the large doors, and started climbing the ladder into the loft. He felt the breeze as Salad leapt past him, arriving first.

“Ooooh, I get it.” Salad said. “Instead of making them think we're taking a roll in the hay, we're going to take a roll in the hay.”

“Eeyup.” He answered as he arrived at the top. A large bale of hay was laid out, ready to serve their needs.

“Come here often?”

“Startin' to sound like we're in a bar, Sally.” He said with a chuckle. She smiled a bit, and nudged against him as they made for the makeshift bed.

“You don't really call me that very often.” She said. “Why?”

“Ah figure it's somethin' ya'd rather have in private.” He answered as he lay down on his side. She settled herself on top, idly resting her wing against his stomach.

“Huh... guess you're right.” She said. “I'd really hate for Pinkie or Dash to get the idea they can do it too. Dash would probably just keep doing it after I told her to stop until I gave up, and then think that made us friends.”

“Ya really don't like her, do ya?”

“Not really, no.” She said, closing her eyes. “Half the time I see her, I end up bucking her in the head. Or I really want to. Maybe I could've liked her if the circumstances were different, or maybe I could start disliking her less over time. Right now though, keep her away from me. She's making me hate rainbows. Rainbows.”

“It'll get better.” He said.

“You sound sure.”

“Well, yer in the public eye now.” He replied. “Fluttershy's friends know about ya now. An they're all alright with ya. Ah don't really see it gettin' much worse. An' Ivan's friends already like ya.”

“Have I even met them all?”

“Well, yer not acquainted with Ditzy yet. Since yer friends with me, Ivan, an'... Rarity now?”

“Yeah, I guess.”

“Shouldn't be long.” He said. “Ditzy's real nice. Don't think there's a mean leaf on her whole family tree.”

“Doesn't she have a kid?”

“Dinky. Good friends with Scootaloo. Asked Ivan to marry her a little while back.” Salad fell into a laughing fit, and Mac smiled as he felt her shake.

“How'd that go?”

“He didn't know what to do 'bout it.” He said. “She said she wanted to marry him because he was the nicest stallion she'd ever met. She wanted a nice father for her foals.”

“Oh my Celestia, she wanted his babies!” Salad roared as she rolled off the stallion, landing in front of him with a rustle of the hay. “Why... why couldn't I have... been there for that?!”

“Said if he did, than he could really be a big brother to all of 'em. The crusaders Ah mean. Since Dinky thought of 'em all like sisters herself. In-laws, she said.” He wrapped a foreleg around the quivering Salad and pulled her close as she tried to get herself under control.

At this rate, she'd be beyond help.

“S-she... she just kept p-pressing?” She managed to wheeze, and Mac started to chuckle himself. It was infectious, the way she carried on.

“Then, she tried sayin' that he could marry all the crusaders. And her mom. Provided her and Ditzy got 'im on Saturdays, 'cause that was a day off from school.”

“Oh my feathering buck, I can't wait to tell Shy.”

“Now, here's where it gets funny.” He said, nuzzling into her mane. “See, Cheerilee was around at the time.”

“Oh no.”

“An' she was havin' a humdinger of a time at poor Ivan's expense. She asked her why she was alright sharing Ivan like that with seven other ponies.”

“Red you're gonna kill me.”

“And Dinky looks at her like it's the plainest thing since day after night. An' she says 'Well, look at 'im! He's way too big for just me!'”

“That's terrible!” She laughed. “I love it!”

“Ah knew ya would.” He said. “They couldn't find a good reason to just tell her no. So they said that she'd have to wait 'til she was old enough to get hitched before askin' again. Otherwise Ivan'd get thrown in jail.”

“Yeah he would!” She said as she started to calm down. “Oh... oh sun... what... what happened after that? Oh moon, my sides...”

“Well, that was a bit too much for Ivan.”

“He fainted?”

“Nnnope. Laughed. First time any o' us had ever really heard it either.”

“When he was a kid, he sounded like a dying goose.”

“Somethin' ya've got in common then.” He drawled, smiling. She chuckled as she shifted further back into his chest. “He gave her a hug, said he was glad he had friends like her, but there were a bunch better ponies than him, and she'd prolly have to see 'em first before she made a decision.”

“I guess after that it isn't very interesting?”

“Nnnope.” he said. His voice was a bit deeper, if possible. Tired. Ready for a nap in the near future.

Salad turned over to get her forelegs around him, and a few moments passed to the sound of his breath and heartbeat.

“Sally...” He started, and she pulled back to look up at him.

He studied her face for a moment, before moving in.

--

“Saaaaally...” She began, looking her over with a confident smirk. “Know what I wanna do to you?”

--

The memory clawed it's way out and she was moving back before she even had time to think about it.

The look in his eye dropped a stone in her gut. He was probably misreading the look in hers.

“Ah... ah thought...” Her hooves were on his chest, firm pressure, trying to push away, and she flicked her gaze down to them when she realized they were there, horrified.

Tears appeared, rolling slowly down from her eyes.

Why am I crying? I didn't... I don't feel like crying. Can straight shock do this? Am I feeling that much? Oh sun, what is he thinking now? Did I buck this up?

“D-did Ah... are ya alright Sally? Do ya wanna stop?”

--

“Are you alright?” Her smile was almost sinister, as she looked over the dazed mare under her. “I know you don't want to stop though. Stay with me, here's where it gets good...”

“J-just... oh wow...” Salad moaned as lips brushed her neck, and a talented hoof gently played with the feathers of her splayed wing.

“It's funny.” She said from Salad's throat. “Can't see the scars from this angle.”

“W-what?” Salad rasped, trying to figure out what that had to do with anything as her mind fogged up.

“Like this, I can pretend you're an actual pegasus.”

Salad's blood froze in her veins as the closet door burst open.

--

“L-let me go.” Salad said shakily. Mac's hooves were off her like they were burned.

“Did Ah-”

“No, you didn't.” She said, cutting him off before he could incriminate himself. “Just...”

I'm not telling you this. It's bad enough I have to think about this while you're trying to get happy sleepy kisses, I'm not going to let you do it too.

Tears still fell. Salad remembered what real crying was like. Sniffling, hard to see, throat got sore... none of that was happening. It was like she was just leaking.

Why won't they bucking stop! He'll think things!

“It's not your fault!” She said desperately. “I just...”

Can't come up with something now. Get out of here. Get under control and figure out an excuse.

“I... I think dinner's a bad idea right now.” She said. “I've, uh... gotta... I just can't...”

“It's... alright.” He said, avoiding her eye. He was confused more than anything, but Salad could see shame.

I did that to him. Holy buck I did that to him. Why did I do that to him?!

“Red, don't-”

“Ah'll just say somethin' came up.” He said. “No harm done.”

Don't leave like this! Set it right, at least make sure he doesn't go thinking he did something terrible!

“Y-yeah... so... I s-should go...”

“Happy to see ya today, S-Salad.” And right then she could feel it. Her throat started to ache, and she sniffed.

She shot out the nearby window, hoping to the sky that Red didn't notice.

--

Fluttershy answered the knock at the door, expecting Salad. She normally popped in around that time to talk about her day, and for sleeping.

She wondered if Salad would be moving in at some point.

“Oh, good evening Cheerilee. Can I help you at all?” She was a little bit disappointed (no more than a little! It wasn't as if she wasn't happy to see Cheerilee, not at all!) but a visit from a nice pony was still a pleasant surprise.

“Yes, hello... are you free right now?”

“Oh, I was about to start dinner. W-would you like to stay?” She had actually made enough for two in case Salad was hungry, and if she was when she arrived, Fluttershy could always make more.

“Actually, I'm here about Salad.”

“O-oh...” And by the look on the schoolteacher's face, it wasn't a pleasant reason that brought her by.

“I take it you're not aware?”

“N-no...”

“Hm...” Cheerilee mused. “Well, it was a little earlier today. She essentially came barreling through the house and locked herself in her room. Ivan hasn't been able to get her out. I figured she came from here since... well this is where she goes when she's upset, normally.”

Fluttershy did nothing but wait patiently, full attention on the teacher, and trying as hard as she could manage not to imagine what could've happened to make her react this way.

...the first thing that came to mind, against her will, was the last time Salad dashed back to her room and locked up. After her first encounter with the Stare.

What could have been worse than that?

...oh... oh my sun no.

“S-she...”

“Hm?” Cheerilee glanced back at the pegasus, having been a bit lost in thought herself a second ago. “What?”

“She was at Sweet Apple Acres.” Fluttershy said. “Both me and Big Mac have jobs to do every day before we're free, and Sally- uh...”

“Salad what?” Cheerilee prompted, pretending she hadn't heard.

“She... she tries to not spend too much more time with one of us over the other.” Fluttershy said. “A lot of the time she, um... sleeps here.” She blushed hotly at the admission, but kept going. She could stand embarassment if it helped get to the bottom of whatever happened, and Cheerilee was trusted. “S-so... she goes to help Macintosh with his work at the farm. Applejack's still not at home, so...”

“So what you're saying is that she was probably there when whatever happened, happened?”

“Probably, yes.”

“...alright, tell you what.” the teacher said with a nod to herself. “This might be personal, so if you're free now...?”

“Of course.”

“Good, you go talk to Big Mac, and I'll keep an eye on her with Ivan.”

“Y-yes, of course...” Fluttershy stuttered as she waved over Angel.

A few moments, and he agreed to watch the homestead. And Fluttershy took off for the farm, trying and failing to repress speculation as to what could've happened between her lovers.

--

Salad curled up a bit tighter as she tried to fight the emotions assailing her.

...at this rate, it'd be a while before she could calm down, wash her face, and pretend it never happened. If Red even let her.

A hoof settled on her back, and she shot upright in surprise.

“...bro?” She asked in confusion. “How did you even get in here?”

Ivan shrugged as he settled himself next to her.

“N-no, seriously...” Salad sniffed back a sob, taking the oppritunity to distract herself. “The d-door was l-locked...”

“Unimportant.”

“If you can get into my room anytime you wan-”

“Not yours.” Ivan said, laying a hoof around her withers and pulling her into a half hug.

“...the rent I pay says otherwi-”

“Unpaid.”

“O-oh...” Salad dried her eyes. “Is that why she gave you the key?”

“Still locked.”

“How did you-”

“Magic.” Ivan said, obviously not about to explain. “Don't live here.”

“...all my stuff's still here.” Salad insisted. “And I paid last month... w-why didn't Cheerilee tell me I was late?”

“Don't live here.” Ivan repeated, stroking her back as he nuzzled her.

“Well then where do I live, genius?”

“Fluttershy's.” Ivan said.

Salad couldn't argue. Half because she realized that Ivan was right. And half because she was reminded why she was locked in a room where she believed she could be alone.

She slowly buried her face in his coat.

“What happened?” Ivan asked.

“I messed up.” Salad answered. She paused, and Ivan waited.

She took a moment to make sure she could breathe properly.

“Red tried putting the moves on me, and I made him think it was attempted rape or something.”

“...and?”

“Well, I bolted. Every part of me wanted out of there, so I left as soon as I had an opening. I left him there thinking that he hurt me.”

“Still here.”

“I... I can't. Not when I'm l-like... this.” She said. “I'm... not supposed to cry. I'll make him think I'm hurt. I can just... pretend it never happened. It isn't a big deal.”

“It is.”

“No, it's not.” Salad said. “This is just me being an idiot.”

“Mm?”

“Whenever there's something wrong, I can usually just hit it in the face and it'll stop bothering me. But right now I'm the problem. S-so I just need a bit of time to get it covered up and I can go on like normal. It's nothing.”

Ivan lifted his head and looked toward the door. Salad wondered if he heard something, but he didn't do anything about it.

“What happened?” Ivan asked again.

“I just... remembered something.” Salad said. “In highschool. I, uh... had a marefriend for a little while... it didn't end well.”

“Memory?”

“Yeah...” Salad said, struggling to keep her composure. “I... thought of her while I was with Red. Shoved him away. The whole thing's just... disgusting. I'm messed up.”

“Tell them?”

“That'd make it worse.” She said. “I don't want them treating me like some delicate butterfly just because I had a bad experience. I don't want them knowing that the last time I tried what I'm trying with them, it made me start hating everypony. I don't ever want them to know that I think of her whenever they try to show me that they care.”

“Ah.” Ivan said. “Sorry.”

“...what the buck do you have to apologize for?”

Ivan's horn lit up, and the door unlocked and opened.

Big Mac didn't react fast enough to stop himself from tripping into the room, but Fluttershy remained upright. Both of them looked guilty, to say the least.

Salad's eyes widened as far as they could go, and it was clear that internally she was panicking so hard she couldn't move or even think.

She was, thus, unable to resist when she was enveloped in green magic and thrust off the bed and into Big Mac's fores.

“Fix her.” Ivan said as he left the room. “I can't.”

The door lightly shut behind him. And they barely heard him telling Cheerilee they were going out for dinner.

They heard the front door close, but none of them moved.

Surprisingly, it wasn't Salad or Mac who spoke first.

“...Shall we go?” Fluttershy asked.

“W-where?” Salad asked, lifting her head to see that Fluttershy was actually smiling.

“Home.” She said.

“Home...?”

“Your home.” Shy insisted. “...that is... if it's alright with you?”

“...Y-yeah...” Salad said. “Yeah... that's alright.”

“I-it is?!” She said, suddenly looking far too excited for the current situation.

Salad made a noise that was half hiccup and half chuckle.

“It's... really alright.” She said, finally starting to feel like everything was going to be alright. “If that's alright with you.”

“yaaay”

Salad didn't quite hear the reply, but Fluttershy looked... pretty happy.

“O-oh, here I am making light of...” She switched to mortified pretty quick, Salad noted.

“Stop that. I'm feeling better now.” Salad said, craning her neck to nuzzle the silent Big Mac affectionately.

“So... is Red coming too?” She asked. “'Cause any home of mine is 'no colts allowed.'”

“That might be a problem.” Fluttershy said, walking into the embrace. “He's more comfy than my bed.”

“Maybe just him.” Salad said. “He doesn't count as a stallion anyway.”

“Careful, Sally.” He said, casing a secret thrill to run up her spine. “Ya might hurt mah feelin's.”

“Nothing bad about it.” She countered. “Neither of us are stallions either.”

“What does that make me then?”

“...ours?” Fluttershy tried. “Is that good enough?”

“It'll have to do.” Salad said. “Really, I just want to make sure Ivan stays out. That thing with the door was a major deal breaker.”

“That might be mean.” Fluttershy said.

“Know what'd be meaner than that?” Mac said. “Ya should bake somethin' delicious. Then share it with us in front of him.”

“I'd do that if it didn't feel like you had an agenda of some kind.”

“No agenda here.” Mac said. “Just gettin' hungry is all.”

“You didn't eat?”

“Ah was worried.” He said.

“...Let's go back then.” Salad said, pulling back. Her face was still streaked with tears. But she undoubtedly looked better than she was. “I'll feed you again I guess.”

“Much obliged.”

“You'd better be obliged...” she muttered, finding her saddlebags and packing them.

She hadn't really gotten anything new since she arrived in Ponyville, so everything she had neatly fit just the way it always did.

A few moments to leave a note that she had moved out, and they were off.

–

It didn't take long to have dinner ready, since Fluttershy had already made enough for two. Salad stepped into the kitchen and made something to go with the rest, and they sat down, talking about nothing until Salad decided to talk about Ivan's encounter with a lovestruck Dinky.

Before long, they found themselves relaxing in Fluttershy's bed. And, since they already knew anyway, Salad felt it was a good time to volunteer information.

“...her name was Hope Spring.” Salad said. “She tried to make me fall in love with her on a cash bet. I... don't even know if she succeeded or not. I destroyed the 'evidence', so she couldn't collect.”

“Evidence?” Big Mac asked, tone a bit cold.

“She spent a whole two months pandering to me. I was... pretty bad. Like, worse than I was when I first got here. Much worse. It took a while, but she got to know me. I didn't have any friends at the time, so after a while I kind of stopped fighting her.

“...she... her special talent was cheering sad ponies up. I have no idea how you can have a talent like that and turn out like she did, but... she had it, and used it. Did things like take me swimming, buy me coffee sometimes... said she thought we were dating when I asked her why she was bothering. It was all downhill from there.

“She had me in her bed. Kissed me a bit, and then started going to town. She didn't get very far, some foreplay... I couldn't really think about anything until her actual friends, including her real marefriend, came bursting out of a closet with a camera and took pictures. Said she stood to make a cool two hundred bits from those. I... hurt them. I wanted to kill them. I think the only reason I didn't do worse than I did was because I didn't want my parents to be ashamed of me.”

She felt Fluttershy hug her from behind, and Big Mac reached out for her, and she was soon wrapped in forelegs and wings.

Salad didn't feel like crying anymore though. She hadn't felt like crying ever since they left Cheerilee's.

“Even if she couldn't give pics, everypony still believed her when she said it happened. She just didn't get the money. Others tried to do what she did a few times, but I overheard them talking about it later and shut them down. Others tried after that, but I didn't give them the chance. Then I dropped out of school and finished it with my parents. After that I said I wanted to find Ivan, so they got me prepared and sent me off.”

“...all that, because of a wing?” Fluttershy asked, nuzzling her.

“Maybe.” She said. “Some of the other attempts were from ponies that were a part of Hope Spring's crowd. So, it might be that there were just a few jerks. Maybe it was because I was such a crazy tightly packed ball of hate at the time. I don't even know. I just gave up after I thought everypony in that building was out to get me.

“I... just don't know at this point. But I don't care anymore.”

“Ya're alright now?” Mac asked, reaching around and pulling both of the mares in.

“Yeah.” Salad said. “I'm... home now. And she doesn't matter anymore, 'cause I, uh...”

“Mm?” Fluttershy prompted, stretching out her wings as far as they could go, managing to cover some of Big Mac as well.

“...I love you.” Salad finished. “Both of you.”

“Same here.” Mac said, holding them a little tighter. Fluttershy muttered something they couldn't even really make out, but the message was clear.

“So...” Salad said. “Now that we're all official and stuff, wanna rut?”

Fluttershy made a squeaking noise like somepony put a vice on her lungs. Mac on the other hand chuckled.

“Yer one of a kind, Sally.”

“No arguments.” She returned. “So. Wanna?”

“...wait.” Mac said, pulling back to look down at her with an eyebrow raised as far as he could reach it. “Ya're serious?”

“Well yeah.” She said. “I know for a fact both of you held back on doing anything because I was like, all conflicted and stuff. That's gone now, so stop holding back. Let's do it like they do on the discovery channel.”

Fluttershy squeaked again, and Salad knew the yellow pegasus would never be able to look at the discovery channel the same way. Ever.

She smirked. Somehow, that felt like an accomplishment.

“...ain't this a little sudden?” The stallion pressed, causing Salad to roll her eyes.

“Dude, I held you two back since we started this thing. I think you've earned having it all at once. Come on, I'm willing. Stop being such a filly about it and do me.”

“Sally, just... stop for a sec” He said. “Yer doin' this cause ya think ya left us blueballed?”

“That's one reason.”

“Ya shouldn-”

“One reason I said. I just said I loved you, so why shouldn't I want this?”

“But-”

“Alright, fine, you don't want to. I get that. I'll just do it with Shy, and you can watch. You're on board, right Shy?”

“meep”

“See? She's co-operating.”

“...do ya even know what to do?” He asked, shuffling back as Salad turned over toward the other pegasus.

“I bet I can figure it out. Look at her. Doesn't she look user friendly?”

“meep”

“Ah think she looks like she's about ta be run over by a speeding manticore.”

“That'll pass. We're about to do sex things. All over her, um... body, and stuff.”

“Really.”

“If you don't think I can, fine, I'll go take out a book at the library. I'll just say that it's for you.”

“Uh-huh.”

“Cause you seem to need a road map to my body after all, since you obviously don't know what to do with it. Otherwise you'd be doing it.”

“Yer havin' way to much fun with this.”

“Eh, feels kinda liberating.” Salad said, turning back. “All this time, interested in absolutely nopony, and then suddenly I've got you two all to myself and I'm ready to actually do something about it. I feel...” She paused, smirk fading as she seemed to come to some epiphany.

“...ya feel...?”

“I'm... happy.” She said. “Really happy. All the stuff holding me back is gone now, and, uh... And I want some lovin'. I want you. Do you honestly not want to?” Her good mood faded as she looked up at him, expression becoming guarded again.

Nnnope, can't have that.

“Ah didn't say that.” He said. “Frankly, the only reason we're not already sleepin' it off is 'cause Ah'm tryin' ta figure out if this is right.”

“...what'd be wrong about it?”

“Maybe yer state o' mind or somethin'. Ah don't know. It just came outta nowhere. Can't Ah be skeptical? Seems reasonable ta me.”

“...yeah, I guess...”

“Ah love ya too.” He said. “An' Ah will if yer sure. Fluttershy probably will too once she gets back from wherever ya sent her.”

“...I'm sure.” She said. “I am.”

“Great.” He said. “You up fer it too, Fluttershy?”

“U-um...”

“Back with us now?” Salad asked.

“Y-yes... I, um...”

“...just because I'm jumping the gun, doesn't mean you have to.”

“N-no... I wouldn't mind.” She smiled, softly. “I actually... kinda want... maybe... umyes...”

“...I'm pretty sure that's consent.” Salad said. “Like, eighty-three percent sure.”

“Close enough.” Mac decided. “So, Fluttershy, hate to ask, but ya done this before?”

“...a few times.” the yellow pegasus replied, shrinking back a bit and blushing. “I, um... was in flight school at the time. Rainbow Dash said... she wanted to make sure her first time was with somepony she could trust. And she said that I could trust her, too. It took a little while for me to agree, but... she, um...

“...she said she wanted to make sure I wouldn't get hurt by making a mistake with it. And... she said she wanted to make me feel beautiful.”

“...seems a little... I dunno, sensitive for her. I didn't think she could do that.” Salad said.

“She can.” Fluttershy said. “And... she did. I don't regret sharing that with her. I'm... happy I did, really.”

“Yeah?”

“I... want to make you feel beautiful too.” Fluttershy confessed, nuzzling her nose to nose.

“Givin' me a tough act to follow there, Fluttershy.”

“Oh?” Salad said. “You got something too?”

“Well, mah first time was actually... heh...”

“You're getting embarassed? Really? You?” Salad laughed at his sheepish expression, turning back to him and poking him in the chest. “C'mon, spill. Do it.”

“Welp... It was some years back... Ah do things to help sometimes. Fixin' stuff. One day, she asked me to fix her fence.”

“She?”

“I ain't gonna spoil the end.” Mac said, making Salad pout. “So, Ah was... pretty awkward back then. Couldn't barely talk to anypony at all. Ah was nearly done, an' she came out with a glass o' lemonade, struck up a conversation. Talked about how Ah was probably pretty sought after. 'No ma'am', Ah said, and she seemed pretty surprised.”

“Sounds like she was buttering you up.” Salad said.

“Probably. Though when Ah stop ta think about it... she was pretty sincere 'bout it all. Kind. Just havin' fun at first...”

“At first?”

“Well...” He continued, “Ah finished mah drink, kept workin' as we talked, an' as Ah was finishin', she asked if Ah had mah eye on anypony.”

“This is kinda playing out like a-”

“Believe me, Ah know.” He said, chuckling. “So Ah said Ah didn't, not really. Didn't talk to anypony really. Spent most o' my time on the farm. So she asked if'n Ah at least thought anypony was handsome, or pretty. 'Yes ma'am' Ah said. But Ah told her that Ma always said it weren't enough ta be pretty or handsome. Good to find out if they're beautiful first, underneath the looks.”

“She smiled then, an' Ah finished up the fence. Asked her if Ah could do anythin' else for her. She asked if Ah could really spare the time. Told her Ah had the whole day to mahself.”

“Scandalous.”

“Quiet you.” he said, huffing a laugh into Salad's mane. “So she asked me if Ah wanted to come in outta the noontime heat, maybe have another drink while she saw 'bout payin' me.”

“Really scandalous.”

“Yeah, kinda was, in hindsight.” He said. “Ah heard stories 'bout scenarios like that at the time, but pushed 'em outta mah head since it seemed too good to be true. So, anyway, Ah did follow her in, sayin' that no payment was necessary, but I really could've gone for another glass o' lemonade. Hot summer day, long walk back to the farm... seemed like a fair deal to me.

“So we talked over another glass 'bout this an' that. Nothin' interesting 'till she asked me why nopony was pursuing an attractive specimen like mahself. Ah replied with somethin' like 'yer flatterin' me', or somethin'. Ya've heard it before Ah'm sure. She insisted. Then she mused out loud that if that's the case, Ah probably had no experience in the matter. 'No ma'am', Ah said.

“So, she looks me in the eye and says she thinks it's a darn crime that Ah've gone unnoticed, and Ah should get mah dues fer attention. 'No ma'am' Ah said. Told her that if nopony felt like comin' after me, that was their business. So she said 'well, what if Ah wanted to have ya all to mahself, right now?'”

“O-oh my...” Fluttershy said, red as a beat. “H-how... forward...”

“Ah thought so. Couldn't do much but gape like just about the most confused goldfish ya ever did see. She said that if nopony else wanted mah company, it was their loss, and she wanted to take the afternoon to make me feel wanted before sendin' me home. And Ah didn't say no.” He said, smiling a bit fondly.

“So... then?” Salad asked, lightly flushed. It looked nice, he thought, against the pink of her coat.

“Yeah, then. Was real gentle with me at first, till Ah got the hang of it. Spent the whole afternoon with her, tryin' ta make sure she felt as appreciated as Ah did.”

“A whole afternoon? Like, what, five hours?”

“Six an' a half. Oh we took breaks.” He said whistfully. “Loads of 'em. But there's a lot to be said 'bout earth pony stamina. Me an' her are still good friends to this day.”

“...so...” Fluttershy said, not able to look him in the eye. “W-who...?”

“Mayor Mare.” He replied with a chuckle. “Ah nearly missed dinner that day. She sent along a note sayin' Ah nearly fixed up the entire house. Said Ah was a real gentlecolt. Now, this was just a bit before mah parents passed on, ya see. So Ma was happy Ah made mahself useful in such a kind way, an' gave me an extra slice o' pie after the meal. But Pa... he knew the second Ah walked in that door that Ah grew up a bit since that mornin'.”

“Oh wow, did it get awkward?” Salad asked, anticipating something funny.

“Well... he asked me how 'fixin' the plumbin' went. An' winked. He knew alright. So Ah told him 'complicated-” Salad burst out laughing and he paused as she rode it out.

“...Complicated, Ah said. But real worth the trouble.”

“I bet it was!” Salad sniggered, and Fluttershy gave an amused smile.

“So he clapped me on the back, told me ta head on up ta bed, an' said that he was proud an' all, but not to bring any of my 'work' home with me while mah sisters were around.”

“Be thankful your dad was cool. My dad would've used that to destroy me. Over and over again.”

“No doubt there.” He said. "So, Ah want to make ya feel wanted too. Not really the same, but..."

There was a pause, as the three tried to decide where to go from there.

“...so... how do we start this?”

“How do ya wanna start?” Mac asked.

Salad didn't say anything, instead studying his face in a way that seemed familiar.

Without warning, she moved forward.

It wasn't quite a lunge, but it was rather forceful. As such though, their snouts bumped, and their teeth clacked, and Salad grunted as she retreated, nose wrinkled in annoyance and no small amount of embarrassment.

“What was that?” Mac couldn't stop himself from asking.

“I was kissing you, stupid.”

“In mah experience, they don't hurt as much as that did.”

“Well in my experience, buck you.”

“Ah wouldn't say that's yer experience just yet...” He said with a chuckle. “We got all night, so calm down. Slower.”

She pursed her lips in thought, and perhaps a bit in preparation, and took his face in her hooves.

She moved in and stopped a millimeter from his lips, hesitating a moment.

When she kissed him, it was slow like he asked. Clumsy too, but that was par for the course.

It ended when she pulled back, half lidded and a little dazed.

“Good for you?” He asked, and she nodded slowly. He smiled, nuzzling her.

“Fluttershy? Ya want a turn too?” He asked, leaning to nuzzle into Salad's throat, and she let a slight sigh escape at the feel of his breath.

Salad was unaware as to when she had closed her eyes, and decided to open them only to see Fluttershy now over her, and lightly pressing her into the bed.

Salad couldn't help but recall the last time she was in that very situation, but it truly didn't matter anymore. She reached up with a hoof, resting it on Fluttershy's cheek.

The other pegasus smiled, conveying overwhelming affection as she lowered herself into Salad's forelegs. The kiss was light as a whisper, and lasted a few tender seconds before Salad moaned as she wrapped her fores around her neck and pulled her in.

Fluttershy was somewhat caught off guard as Salad tried to discover how to use her tongue. Though that wasn't to say she was against it at all...

“Say, Fluttershy, got a question.” Mac said, and she fought through the dizzying fog Salad's efforts were causing to pay attention.

“Mm?”

“So, wings... how do they work?” Salad broke the kiss with a wet pop took a few breaths, and looked at him incredulously.

“You still haven't read that chapter?”

“Figured findin' out this way'd be more fun.” He said, turning Fluttershy's face toward him and kissing her soundly for a few moments.

And when he was done, Fluttershy swayed in place for a moment, not altogether there.

“...did we break her?” Salad asked.

“N-no... I'm just...” Shy stuttered as she realized what she had been doing. “...that, um... was nice...”

“Yer too kind, Shy. So, wings?”

“O-oh... Sally, may I?”

“Why do you still feel like you have to ask? Here- huh?” She tried to unfurl her wing and present it, but it was difficult to move. A quick side glance found it quite erect against the bed. “Um... oh...”

“Ya know, Ah'm pretty sure Ah know what that means.” Big Mac said, quite amused by the spectacle and Salad's efforts to avoid looking him in the eye. “But why don't ya tell me anyway?”

“S-she... when wings, um... do that, it means...” Shy lightly prodded a point she knew wasn't very sensitive, and her eyes widened. “O-oh my, she's very aroused. Wings aren't meant to get much more rigid than this...”

“W-well, what do you expect?!” Salad said, just a tad defiantly. “You're both, like... yeah, so what's so unbelievable about this?!”

“Just a few kisses?” Mac asked, corners of his mouth twitching.

“I liked it shut up.”

“Hey, Fluttershy? How do we make her stop that an' play nice?”

“W-we run a hoof lightly up the primaries like this...” Shy said, and Salad balked a moment when she sounded mischievous of all things. Then the sensation hit unexpectedly.

“Nnngh!” She grunted through grit teeth as she arched against the bed.

“...are wings normally that sensitive?” Big Mac asked.

“S-Sally seems to be a special case...” Fluttershy said, as she worked. “It... could be because she's only been touched here like this once...”

“N-not like this...” Salad managed to get out between one moan and another. “S-she just kinda... ran her hooves over it...”

“Well then...” Mac said, reaching out a hoof and rolling an unresisting Salad onto her stomach. Her scarred side made it easy. “Anythin' else Ah should know?” He asked, playing a little with some of the feathers Fluttershy pointed out.

“W-well... we're very sensitive around the base of the wing... so if you massage lightly with a hoof like so...”

“O-oh Celestia!”

“Ah see..." He said, hoof on his chin as he observed. "Hey, Fluttershy?”

“Mm?”

“Can't help but notice she's got two wing bases. Even if she's only got one wing.”

Fluttershy's eyes widened a bit as she considered it. She looked a little closer, and the stump was indeed twitching a bit in time with the wing opposite.

Fluttershy tentatively began to massage the other base as well, and if Salad's increasingly dirty exclamations were anything to go by, it was more than a little enjoyable. Fluttershy swallowed as she pressed.

“And then... just a teensy bit firmer...”

“Aah, oh sun I don't even-”

“A-and, tug a bit on the tertials...” she said, breath quickening as the sheer volume of Salad's pleasure started to get to her.

“Uh... Fluttershy?” Big Mac said, but she was in her own little world as she bore down on the defenceless Salad.

“And now, now...” One of her hinds shifted, and Big Mac knew exactly what was happening as Fluttershy's knee started pressing into Salad's nethers.

Salad nearly bucked Fluttershy off when she reacted. Fluttershy gasped delightedly as the movement brought her to unexpectedly grind against Salad's rump.

At this point, Mac decided to just be content watching the show. There was little chance of him getting through to either of them in this state.

“I-ish ih... gud fer you?” Fluttershy managed to say around Salad's mane, which she was now pulling on.

And Salad, from what Big Mac could tell, couldn't do anything but submissively take it like a champ.

...not that it wasn't very good to watch, because it was. He wondered, hypothetically, how hard Salad would punch him if she came out of that post coital haze to find that he had made popcorn.

Salad's body started to quake harder, and the things she was saying just plain stopped making sense. Fluttershy had wrapped Salad's head in her wings, and was now holding it steady as she devoured Salad's mouth in the most wanton parody of kissing Mac had ever seen.

...well this is a bit outta the blue... Who knew she was such a dragon in the sack?

Mac, deciding he had about enough of sitting on the sidelines, shuffled his way up behind the pair, and gently started working the bases of Fluttershy's wings.

She was surprised, but didn't resist. Not that she was of much of a mind to anyway.

“Now that Ah know where the roads are...” He said with a chuckle, nosing around the base of Fluttershy's neck, and putting a hind hoof down on her tail to gently tug at it.

Fluttershy gasped in alarm when she felt him positioning himself, and he chuckled as he slowly immersed himself in her.

“...huh. Expected to have to be gentler with ya.” Mac said as his hips met hers. And he slowly withdrew as Fluttershy tried to compose herself enough to respond.

“D-Dash was... u-um...”

“Tell me later.” He said huskily into her ear. “Ah don't want ya thinkin' o' her when yer with me.”

“S-same here...” Salad said pitifully from her place on the bottom. Fluttershy's surprise gave her the opening to put her mind back together again. “Buck that mare...”

“Ah'd have to leave fer that- ow!” Salad turned over so she was facing up, and gave him a soft (for her) blow to his mouth.

“Less talking. Make her melt.”

“Yes'm.” He said as he buried himself back in to the hilt. The yellow pegasus squealed as he gently bit down on one of her wing bases, and built himself into a steady rhythm. And Salad, happy to finally have some control again, pulled her head down to hers, reaching around to give the other wing some attention.

Fluttershy, like Salad intended, melted.

“Hey, Red, give it to her harder.” Salad said between kisses, giving Fluttershy's flank a smack for emphasis.

“Ya're bein' a bit...” He couldn't articulate his response, he realized, without getting hit again. Thankfully, Salad interrupted.

“Don't care. You got your show, now give me mine. You saw what she was doing to me. She wants i-iiigh.” Fluttershy began grinding her knee into Salad again, dipping her head to nibble at her neck.

Big Mac took but a moment to realize just how lucky he was before he started moving faster.

“Oh, Macintosh...!” Oh, he loved the way his name sounded, said like that. It wasn't the first time he had heard it, but moon if it was ever going to get old. Especially when it was Fluttershy's soft lyrical voice twisted up in the moment.

...he wondered, idly, how it would sound if Salad said it that way.

“Ffffffluttersh-agh sun!”

...something like that, probably.

He sped up again, losing himself in the feeling and grinding her hard against the pliant Salad below.

Salad popped first, abandoning all attempts to pleasure the other two as she hugged Fluttershy as hard as she could manage while she rode out the unfamiliar feelings with a guttural scream.

Salad falling over the edge was just the visual stimulus Fluttershy needed, shaking and squeaking between the other two. Big Mac followed, feeling her squeeze and shudder around him.

He didn't settle his weight on them, since that probably would've ended up crushing Salad. He pulled out of Fluttershy, and gently rolled her off to one side of Salad, settling himself on the other.

A few moments of heavy breathing followed.

“...wow.” Salad said, looking up at nothing.

“Eeyup.” Mac said. “Aren't ya glad ya saved it fer us?”

“Yes.” She said, closing her eyes and settling back into a pillow.

“So, ready fer round two?”

“Wait, what?” Her eyes snapped open. “But you just spent yourself. Shy's leaking it all over her sheets.”

“S-Sally!” The other pegasus yelped.

“What's that they say? 'Don't spend it all in one place'?”

“Macintosh!”

“What, you're still ready to go?” Salad asked, glancing at him over her shoulder. He smirked.

“Ah said somethin' bout stamina. Ah don't make claims Ah can't back up.” He said, grinding his hips into her backside and lightly nibbling around the top of her spine.

“Wha... huh?” She said, dazedly as she arched back into him.

“Ah figured ya wanted a turn too. Asked fer it, Ah reckon.”

“Mmmm...” She hummed. “What if I'm too tired?”

“Ah could think of a few things ta perk ya up. Wanna give me a hoof Fluttershy?”

“U-um...” she mumbled, but she scooted forward and took Salad into her hooves, holding her tenderly.

“...if you're trying to turn me on, I think you're doing it wrong.” Salad said. “Not that I'm complaining here...”

“This... is what I want to do right now.” Fluttershy said.

“You hold me all the time.”

“I love holding you.”

“...y-you're going to give me diabetes Shy.” Salad muttered.

Shy didn't say anything else, instead lightly weaving her hoof through her feathers, just enough to barely tease.

All in all, it all somehow felt adorable. Just light sprinklings of lust in with a sea of affection.

Salad's heart clenched as it dawned on her yet again what she had stumbled into.

She returned the hug, turning her head up to claim Shy's lips, and pulled her back as she moved just a bit farther to press against Big Mac.

Her tail flicked invitingly against Big Mac's side, and he answered, shifting into a better position as he kept up his ministrations.

Her kiss with Shy broke off as she felt him start to slide home. The sensation of stretching around him nearly sent her cross-eyed, but she managed to refrain from at least that.

“...huh... you too?”

“Training for a-aerial combat requires f-flexibility...” Salad said, breathing like she was suddenly dumped in cold water. “I-I'm... really flexible...”

Both of them stopped their activity for a moment as they considered this, their heads tilted slightly to the side when the mental imagery went south.

“Heard 'bout stuff like that..." Big Mac said, after deciding it was best thought about later. "...broke it yerself then?”

“Yeah... that was kind of an embarrassing day...”

“Ah'll bet...” He said. “Ah'm just glad neither o' ya had to get hurt tonight.”

“Y-yeah, good times, wooo- ungh...” Mac gave a slow thrust, and Fluttershy giggled a bit.

“What's so funny?” Mac asked.

“Her eyes crossed!” She said. “N-not that it's a thing to be ashamed of, it's just, the face you made was so funny, but I'm not laughing at you-mfff.”

I am so glad I can do this now. Salad thought as she silenced her in a way she was pretty sure everypony involved was happy with. Then coherent thought ceased as Mac started to pick up the pace and Fluttershy started to be less tender and more sexy.

Salad was barely sure how much time was spent as she slowly came undone under everything they did, but one thing she was aware of was that Mac was maintaining a speed that was starting to become not enough.

“H-hey... Red...”

“Mm?”

“Harder...”

“Hmmm...” He hummed in thought.

“J-just... just do it, c'mon...”

“Say mah name.” Salad's eyes shot open.

“What the buck.”

“Ain't never heard it from ya.” He said. “Ah was 'Red' from the start.”

“If you didn't li-iiike it, then y-you shou-oh sun... you should've saaiiiiid so!” He picked around that time to start firmer movements, but they were still not quite what she needed and it was starting to get frustrating...

“Ah didn't hate it at all...” He said. “Ya can keep on doin' it if ya like. Ah just want to hear mah name from ya right now.”

“B-buck you!”

“Funny choice o' words there, Sally...” He growled into her ear, and she could hear the smirk he was definitely wearing. “Now say it.”

“Ffffffff...”

“Ain't that hard.” He said. “Fluttershy did it just a little while ago...”

“I'll get you back for thi-aahhhhhh...”

“Did ya forget?” He asked. “Didn't think Ah was that good...”

He was giving her exactly what she wanted now, and it was hard to concentrate on not complying with his demand.

She was even having trouble remembering why giving in would be bad. Maybe it wasn't?

“C'mon...” He said with a chuckle.

“Mmmuh...”

There we go. He thought as he angled himself just right, and thrust hard.

“M-Macintosh...!” she hissed through grit teeth as she finished, eyes screwed shut as he hit a spot she didn't even know existed.

And he didn't stop. He kept pounding her just as hard as she climaxed, and she found herself peaking again before she even knew what was going on.

And when the third one came, and she felt him seize up and something hot spread out inside, she gave one final incoherent shriek before slumping bonelessly into the bed, still trapped between him and Fluttershy.

The yellow pegasus kissed the corner of her mouth, and then she felt Big Mac reach and turn her head so he could get a kiss of his own.

“...Red...” She said when the kiss ended. “The... the only reason I'm not killing you right now is b-because... I can't feel my hooves...”

“Just as planned?” He said sheepishly.

“Buck you.” She returned. “Gimme back my virginity you... you stupid...”

“If ya wanna get technical... it was kinda Fluttershy that took it.”

“Good.” Salad spat. “She can keep it. She's not a butt. You are.”

“Um...” Fluttershy said. “Sally, are you alright?”

“J-just... tired...” she muttered as they dissolved into a nuzzling pile of ponies on the bed. “We're... done now, right? I liked it, I did, but... I just wanna sleep now...”

“Yeah, think we're 'bout done. You satisfied, Fluttershy?”

“Oh yes...” she said with a happy titter, and Salad had an image of her prancing around the next morning, a bluebird landing on her shoulder, and spontaneous song and dance erupting out of nowhere about what they had just got done doing.

Suddenly, all that talk about how awesome getting laid was made sense.

She supposed Red would strut around like a peacock or something. 'Oh, great day, ain't it? Yeah, just bagged mahself two mares, nothin' big, just me bein' totally awesome.'

...maybe not those exact words, but something similar.

Well, fine. They could do that all they wanted. She'd probably do something too. Maybe go to market the next day, get bumped into by another pony or something, and she wouldn't kill them with heat vision.

And they'd be like 'oh wow, wonder what happened to put her in such a merciful mood, I thought I was going straight to Tartarus that time!'

“'Night.” Mac said, firmly securing the two pegasi in his embrace before nodding off. She felt his head settle on top of hers.

I'm thinking about stupid stuff when I could be sleeping.

“Goodnight...” Fluttershy said, tugging the blanket up over them all, and settling her wings over them underneath.

I'll just deal with all the smug self satisfied happiness when it comes, I guess...

“Yeah, g'night...” Salad returned, settling her wing over 'Shy and pulling her in.

Well, when it comes at a time I'd rather not be sleeping at least...

...also have to come up with a way to... get back at Red...

...better not try that again...

--

And her eyes opened to discover she wasn't alone in bed.

Normally, whenever she slept with them, Red would get up with the sun and leave them without waking them up. And Fluttershy would get up and start making breakfast, whistling with a few birds, and Salad would wake up to the song in an empty bed, eat, and head out to help on the farm.

Red seemed to be sleeping in today, as Salad could see the sunrise was finishing up.

...holy buck, we have a routine...

They'd probably have to shower or something. Especially Red, since he'd have to make sure he didn't face his family smelling like last night. Maybe he'd stay for breakfast, and she could actually walk him to the farm for a change.

Now that Salad had pulled her head out of her plot, she wondered if it meant he'd be spending all his nights with them. He talked about how much the walk didn't bother him over and over again.

And the bed's big enough...

Maybe after his sister got back, the pressure would be off, and he could actually... properly move in with them?

...this is my life now. She realized, warm despite the chill mornings always seemed to carry.

She lay down again, fitting herself back in position.

This is... our life now...

She was glad they were asleep for this. If they had saw the smile she had at the thought, she'd never live it down.

Fading Scars (Clean)

Final Chapter
Fading Scars

...Why am I not over it yet? Salad thought to herself depressingly, a few weeks later.

Several things had transpired. Some mundane but welcome, like a picnic with the two, and them surprising her after work by showing up and walking her to a home cooked meal at the cottage (which had apparently become their default hangout, what with the quiet area, cozy atmosphere, and large bed).

A few other things, like getting to Pinkie Pie and clearing up the whole mess. Apparently none of them had thought that Salad was totally responsible, and even Rainbow Dash wasn't really put out about the whole kick-to-the-head thing.

By then, Salad was mellow enough to agree to perhaps the smallest party Pinkie had ever thrown. A letter was apparently written to Princess Celestia, possibly with an invitation, and Salad was very grateful that the ruler hadn't shown up.

Having somepony like that around when Salad herself was so knowingly not nice with strangers would've been nerve wracking.

All in all though, Salad had a problem.

The relationship was still awesome. Sometimes it was like she was dreaming on the Surf Harp again. Occasionally she'd still get angry, but they'd both put an end to it, talk out their problems, and then they'd be gone in a flash.

...making up was down, but Salad had yet to even kiss either of them.

Fluttershy was paranoid about trying anything again. It might've had something to do with how it had ended the last time, with a critically enraged Salad chasing two of Shy's best friends clear to the farm intent on cold blooded murder. It might've had something to do with how jittery and tense Salad noticeably got at the very mention of anything remotely close to intimacy. Might've even had something to do with how Salad had to get out and think about things after the first failure.

Hay, she might've even felt guilty attempting to cross a line without Red present.

And Red seemed completely unwilling to push the envelope while Salad was in such turmoil about the whole thing. Of course, that also meant between him, Shy's sudden indecisiveness, and Salad's inability to commence higher brain function once things began to steer toward the subject at hoof, they were all at a standstill.

Salad had mediocre experience in such things, and that was putting it charitably. Throughout her life, she had only been kissed a total of twice. Her first was stolen as part of a dare on the playground when she was still on her pre-disaster rampage, and the unlucky pony who had committed the crime had gotten Ivan sicced on them in short order.

The second had been several years later, in school. An earth mare had been bet money that she couldn't seduce the even-more-unruly-at-the-time pegasus, and it hadn't ended well when the truth had come out.

Then two more attempts were made that Salad overheard planning for, and she gave up on friendship altogether.

There had been others that remained ambiguous. Some of them had either been good actors... or, as Salad was beginning to now realize was possible, totally sincere. It was a risk she had been unwilling to take though. She had to grit her teeth and force herself to other trains of thought whenever what could've been popped into her head.

Soon after that, she had left home, convinced that Ivan was her last hope for a pony to potentially trust.

So... how can I expect to do any of it right?

She was spending a day off helping Red finish up at the farm, hoping to the sun that she'd have a chance to sort through her misgivings before either of them tried anything again.

What's even my bucking problem? I can barely remember the last time I actually slept in my own bed. Or alone, for that matter.

“Thanks.” Red said as he finished putting everything away. Salad nodded absently.

If only I could stop thinking about that time whenever things start heating up...

“Ya alright?” He asked as they walked back to his house.

Oh, it's nothing, just trying not to think about the thing that finally broke me whenever you or Shy want to kiss me. Or do just about anything that's above a hug. You know how it is, I'm sure.

Am I going to have to be mostly asleep again before I'll actually bucking relax?

“Fine.” She managed to force out. This wasn't something she wanted them to know.

“...Goin' anywhere?” He asked, thankfully dropping the subject.

“Are you trying to get rid of me?”

“Ah'm wonderin' if'n ya wanna stay fer dinner.”

“Red, I've cooked for you for the past three days. We're going to have words if you start taking it for granted.”

“Actually, Granny wanted ta meet ya.”

Oh buck, family. Salad thought with a start.

“See, she already knows Fluttershy.” He went on, oblivious to Salad's sudden apprehension. “But she hasn't heard a thing 'bout ya at all. 'Cept how Applebloom thought ya were the most sour apple she'd ever met once ya arrived. And how Ah apparently know better.”

“...yeah?”

“She normally cooks the meals. A.J. Ain't half bad in the kitchen, an' Ah can survive, but last time we tried to take that from 'er, we got hit with a ladle.”

“So I shouldn't help? At all?”

“Prolly best if'n ya give 'er a chance to get used to ya.” He said.

“Well, that gives us a couple hours with nothing to do.” Salad said. “Any ideas?”

“One or two.” Mac replied. “Feel like a nap?”

“Wouldn't heading on up to your room past your little sister and granny into your room, and I assume we'd close the door behind us, seem a little...”

“Ya know Ah'm smarter than that.” He said with an amused snort.

“I'm waiting for you to prove it.”

“Over here.” He said, turning toward the barn.

He nudged open the large doors, and started climbing the ladder into the loft. He felt the breeze as Salad leapt past him, arriving first.

“Ooooh, I get it.” Salad said. “Instead of making them think we're taking a roll in the hay, we're going to take a roll in the hay.”

“Eeyup.” He answered as he arrived at the top. A large bale of hay was laid out, ready to serve their needs.

“Come here often?”

“Startin' to sound like we're in a bar, Sally.” He said with a chuckle. She smiled a bit, and nudged against him as they made for the makeshift bed.

“You don't really call me that very often.” She said. “Why?”

“Ah figure it's somethin' ya'd rather have in private.” He answered as he lay down on his side. She settled herself on top, idly resting her wing against his stomach.

“Huh... guess you're right.” She said. “I'd really hate for Pinkie or Dash to get the idea they can do it too. Dash would probably just keep doing it after I told her to stop until I gave up, and then think that made us friends.”

“Ya really don't like her, do ya?”

“Not really, no.” She said, closing her eyes. “Half the time I see her, I end up bucking her in the head. Or I really want to. Maybe I could've liked her if the circumstances were different, or maybe I could start disliking her less over time. Right now though, keep her away from me. She's making me hate rainbows. Rainbows.”

“It'll get better.” He said.

“You sound sure.”

“Well, yer in the public eye now.” He replied. “Fluttershy's friends know about ya now. An they're all alright with ya. Ah don't really see it gettin' much worse. An' Ivan's friends already like ya.”

“Have I even met them all?”

“Well, yer not acquainted with Ditzy yet. Since yer friends with me, Ivan, an'... Rarity now?”

“Yeah, I guess.”

“Shouldn't be long.” He said. “Ditzy's real nice. Don't think there's a mean leaf on her whole family tree.”

“Doesn't she have a kid?”

“Dinky. Good friends with Scootaloo. Asked Ivan to marry her a little while back.” Salad fell into a laughing fit, and Mac smiled as he felt her shake.

“How'd that go?”

“He didn't know what to do 'bout it.” He said. “She said she wanted to marry him because he was the nicest stallion she'd ever met. She wanted a nice father for her foals.”

“Oh my Celestia, she wanted his babies!” Salad roared as she rolled off the stallion, landing in front of him with a rustle of the hay. “Why... why couldn't I have... been there for that?!”

“Said if he did, than he could really be a big brother to all of 'em. The crusaders Ah mean. Since Dinky thought of 'em all like sisters herself. In-laws, she said.” He wrapped a foreleg around the quivering Salad and pulled her close as she tried to get herself under control.

At this rate, she'd be beyond help.

“S-she... she just kept p-pressing?” She managed to wheeze, and Mac started to chuckle himself. It was infectious, the way she carried on.

“Then, she tried sayin' that he could marry all the crusaders. And her mom. Provided her and Ditzy got 'im on Saturdays, 'cause that was a day off from school.”

“Oh my feathering buck, I can't wait to tell Shy.”

“Now, here's where it gets funny.” He said, nuzzling into her mane. “See, Cheerilee was around at the time.”

“Oh no.”

“An' she was havin' a humdinger of a time at poor Ivan's expense. She asked her why she was alright sharing Ivan like that with seven other ponies.”

“Red you're gonna kill me.”

“And Dinky looks at her like it's the plainest thing since day after night. An' she says 'Well, look at 'im! He's way too big for just me!'”

“That's terrible!” She laughed. “I love it!”

“Ah knew ya would.” He said. “They couldn't find a good reason to just tell her no. So they said that she'd have to wait 'til she was old enough to get hitched before askin' again. Otherwise Ivan'd get thrown in jail.”

“Yeah he would!” She said as she started to calm down. “Oh... oh sun... what... what happened after that? Oh moon, my sides...”

“Well, that was a bit too much for Ivan.”

“He fainted?”

“Nnnope. Laughed. First time any o' us had ever really heard it either.”

“When he was a kid, he sounded like a dying goose.”

“Somethin' ya've got in common then.” He drawled, smiling. She chuckled as she shifted further back into his chest. “He gave her a hug, said he was glad he had friends like her, but there were a bunch better ponies than him, and she'd prolly have to see 'em first before she made a decision.”

“I guess after that it isn't very interesting?”

“Nnnope.” he said. His voice was a bit deeper, if possible. Tired. Ready for a nap in the near future.

Salad turned over to get her forelegs around him, and a few moments passed to the sound of his breath and heartbeat.

“Sally...” He started, and she pulled back to look up at him.

He studied her face for a moment, before moving in.

--

“Saaaaally...” She began, looking her over with a confident smirk. “Know what I wanna do to you?”

--

The memory clawed it's way out and she was moving back before she even had time to think about it.

The look in his eye dropped a stone in her gut. He was probably misreading the look in hers.

“Ah... ah thought...” Her hooves were on his chest, firm pressure, trying to push away, and she flicked her gaze down to them when she realized they were there, horrified.

Tears appeared, rolling slowly down from her eyes.

Why am I crying? I didn't... I don't feel like crying. Can straight shock do this? Am I feeling that much? Oh sun, what is he thinking now? Did I buck this up?

“D-did Ah... are ya alright Sally? Do ya wanna stop?”

--

“Are you alright?” Her smile was almost sinister, as she looked over the dazed mare under her. “I know you don't want to stop though. Stay with me, here's where it gets good...”

“J-just... oh wow...” Salad moaned as lips brushed her neck, and a talented hoof gently played with the feathers of her splayed wing.

“It's funny.” She said from Salad's throat. “Can't see the scars from this angle.”

“W-what?” Salad rasped, trying to figure out what that had to do with anything as her mind fogged up.

“Like this, I can pretend you're an actual pegasus.”

Salad's blood froze in her veins as the closet door burst open.

--

“L-let me go.” Salad said shakily. Mac's hooves were off her like they were burned.

“Did Ah-”

“No, you didn't.” She said, cutting him off before he could incriminate himself. “Just...”

I'm not telling you this. It's bad enough I have to think about this while you're trying to get happy sleepy kisses, I'm not going to let you do it too.

Tears still fell. Salad remembered what real crying was like. Sniffling, hard to see, throat got sore... none of that was happening. It was like she was just leaking.

Why won't they bucking stop! He'll think things!

“It's not your fault!” She said desperately. “I just...”

Can't come up with something now. Get out of here. Get under control and figure out an excuse.

“I... I think dinner's a bad idea right now.” She said. “I've, uh... gotta... I just can't...”

“It's... alright.” He said, avoiding her eye. He was confused more than anything, but Salad could see shame.

I did that to him. Holy buck I did that to him. Why did I do that to him?!

“Red, don't-”

“Ah'll just say somethin' came up.” He said. “No harm done.”

Don't leave like this! Set it right, at least make sure he doesn't go thinking he did something terrible!

“Y-yeah... so... I s-should go...”

“Happy to see ya today, S-Salad.” And right then she could feel it. Her throat started to ache, and she sniffed.

She shot out the nearby window, hoping to the sky that Red didn't notice.

--

Fluttershy answered the knock at the door, expecting Salad. She normally popped in around that time to talk about her day, and for sleeping.

She wondered if Salad would be moving in at some point.

“Oh, good evening Cheerilee. Can I help you at all?” She was a little bit disappointed (no more than a little! It wasn't as if she wasn't happy to see Cheerilee, not at all!) but a visit from a nice pony was still a pleasant surprise.

“Yes, hello... are you free right now?”

“Oh, I was about to start dinner. W-would you like to stay?” She had actually made enough for two in case Salad was hungry, and if she was when she arrived, Fluttershy could always make more.

“Actually, I'm here about Salad.”

“O-oh...” And by the look on the schoolteacher's face, it wasn't a pleasant reason that brought her by.

“I take it you're not aware?”

“N-no...”

“Hm...” Cheerilee mused. “Well, it was a little earlier today. She essentially came barreling through the house and locked herself in her room. Ivan hasn't been able to get her out. I figured she came from here since... well this is where she goes when she's upset, normally.”

Fluttershy did nothing but wait patiently, full attention on the teacher, and trying as hard as she could manage not to imagine what could've happened to make her react this way.

...the first thing that came to mind, against her will, was the last time Salad dashed back to her room and locked up. After her first encounter with the Stare.

What could have been worse than that?

...oh... oh my sun no.

“S-she...”

“Hm?” Cheerilee glanced back at the pegasus, having been a bit lost in thought herself a second ago. “What?”

“She was at Sweet Apple Acres.” Fluttershy said. “Both me and Big Mac have jobs to do every day before we're free, and Sally- uh...”

“Salad what?” Cheerilee prompted, pretending she hadn't heard.

“She... she tries to not spend too much more time with one of us over the other.” Fluttershy said. “A lot of the time she, um... sleeps here.” She blushed hotly at the admission, but kept going. She could stand embarassment if it helped get to the bottom of whatever happened, and Cheerilee was trusted. “S-so... she goes to help Macintosh with his work at the farm. Applejack's still not at home, so...”

“So what you're saying is that she was probably there when whatever happened, happened?”

“Probably, yes.”

“...alright, tell you what.” the teacher said with a nod to herself. “This might be personal, so if you're free now...?”

“Of course.”

“Good, you go talk to Big Mac, and I'll keep an eye on her with Ivan.”

“Y-yes, of course...” Fluttershy stuttered as she waved over Angel.

A few moments, and he agreed to watch the homestead. And Fluttershy took off for the farm, trying and failing to repress speculation as to what could've happened between her lovers.

--

Salad curled up a bit tighter as she tried to fight the emotions assailing her.

...at this rate, it'd be a while before she could calm down, wash her face, and pretend it never happened. If Red even let her.

A hoof settled on her back, and she shot upright in surprise.

“...bro?” She asked in confusion. “How did you even get in here?”

Ivan shrugged as he settled himself next to her.

“N-no, seriously...” Salad sniffed back a sob, taking the oppritunity to distract herself. “The d-door was l-locked...”

“Unimportant.”

“If you can get into my room anytime you wan-”

“Not yours.” Ivan said, laying a hoof around her withers and pulling her into a half hug.

“...the rent I pay says otherwi-”

“Unpaid.”

“O-oh...” Salad dried her eyes. “Is that why she gave you the key?”

“Still locked.”

“How did you-”

“Magic.” Ivan said, obviously not about to explain. “Don't live here.”

“...all my stuff's still here.” Salad insisted. “And I paid last month... w-why didn't Cheerilee tell me I was late?”

“Don't live here.” Ivan repeated, stroking her back as he nuzzled her.

“Well then where do I live, genius?”

“Fluttershy's.” Ivan said.

Salad couldn't argue. Half because she realized that Ivan was right. And half because she was reminded why she was locked in a room where she believed she could be alone.

She slowly buried her face in his coat.

“What happened?” Ivan asked.

“I messed up.” Salad answered. She paused, and Ivan waited.

She took a moment to make sure she could breathe properly.

“Red tried putting the moves on me, and I made him think it was attempted rape or something.”

“...and?”

“Well, I bolted. Every part of me wanted out of there, so I left as soon as I had an opening. I left him there thinking that he hurt me.”

“Still here.”

“I... I can't. Not when I'm l-like... this.” She said. “I'm... not supposed to cry. I'll make him think I'm hurt. I can just... pretend it never happened. It isn't a big deal.”

“It is.”

“No, it's not.” Salad said. “This is just me being an idiot.”

“Mm?”

“Whenever there's something wrong, I can usually just hit it in the face and it'll stop bothering me. But right now I'm the problem. S-so I just need a bit of time to get it covered up and I can go on like normal. It's nothing.”

Ivan lifted his head and looked toward the door. Salad wondered if he heard something, but he didn't do anything about it.

“What happened?” Ivan asked again.

“I just... remembered something.” Salad said. “In highschool. I, uh... had a marefriend for a little while... it didn't end well.”

“Memory?”

“Yeah...” Salad said, struggling to keep her composure. “I... thought of her while I was with Red. Shoved him away. The whole thing's just... disgusting. I'm messed up.”

“Tell them?”

“That'd make it worse.” She said. “I don't want them treating me like some delicate butterfly just because I had a bad experience. I don't want them knowing that the last time I tried what I'm trying with them, it made me start hating everypony. I don't ever want them to know that I think of her whenever they try to show me that they care.”

“Ah.” Ivan said. “Sorry.”

“...what the buck do you have to apologize for?”

Ivan's horn lit up, and the door unlocked and opened.

Big Mac didn't react fast enough to stop himself from tripping into the room, but Fluttershy remained upright. Both of them looked guilty, to say the least.

Salad's eyes widened as far as they could go, and it was clear that internally she was panicking so hard she couldn't move or even think.

She was, thus, unable to resist when she was enveloped in green magic and thrust off the bed and into Big Mac's fores.

“Fix her.” Ivan said as he left the room. “I can't.”

The door lightly shut behind him. And they barely heard him telling Cheerilee they were going out for dinner.

They heard the front door close, but none of them moved.

Surprisingly, it wasn't Salad or Mac who spoke first.

“...Shall we go?” Fluttershy asked.

“W-where?” Salad asked, lifting her head to see that Fluttershy was actually smiling.

“Home.” She said.

“Home...?”

“Your home.” Shy insisted. “...that is... if it's alright with you?”

“...Y-yeah...” Salad said. “Yeah... that's alright.”

“I-it is?!” She said, suddenly looking far too excited for the current situation.

Salad made a noise that was half hiccup and half chuckle.

“It's... really alright.” She said, finally starting to feel like everything was going to be alright. “If that's alright with you.”

“yaaay”

Salad didn't quite hear the reply, but Fluttershy looked... pretty happy.

“O-oh, here I am making light of...” She switched to mortified pretty quick, Salad noted.

“Stop that. I'm feeling better now.” Salad said, craning her neck to nuzzle the silent Big Mac affectionately.

“So... is Red coming too?” She asked. “'Cause any home of mine is 'no colts allowed.'”

“That might be a problem.” Fluttershy said, walking into the embrace. “He's more comfy than my bed.”

“Maybe just him.” Salad said. “He doesn't count as a stallion anyway.”

“Careful Sally.” He said, casing a secret thrill to run up her spine. “Ya might hurt mah feelin's.”

“Nothing bad about it.” She countered. “Neither of us are stallions either.”

“What does that make me then?”

“...ours?” Fluttershy tried. “Is that good enough?”

“It'll have to do.” Salad said. “Really, I just want to make sure Ivan stays out. That thing with the door was a major deal breaker.”

“That might be mean.” Fluttershy said.

“Know what'd be meaner than that?” Mac said. “Ya should bake somethin' delicious. Then share it with us in front of him.”

“I'd do that if it didn't feel like you had an agenda of some kind.”

“No agenda here.” Mac said. “Just gettin' hungry is all.”

“You didn't eat?”

“Ah was worried.” He said.

“...Let's go back then.” Salad said, pulling back. Her face was still streaked with tears. But she undoubtedly looked better than she was. “I'll feed you again I guess.”

“Much obliged.”

“You'd better be obliged...” she muttered, finding her saddlebags and packing them.

She hadn't really gotten anything new since she arrived in Ponyville, so everything she had neatly fit just the way it always did.

A few moments to leave a note that she had moved out, and they were off.

–

It didn't take long to have dinner ready, since Fluttershy had already made enough for two. Salad stepped into the kitchen and made something to go with the rest, and they sat down, talking about nothing until Salad decided to talk about Ivan's encounter with a lovestruck Dinky.

Before long, they found themselves relaxing in Fluttershy's bed. And, since they already knew anyway, Salad felt it was a good time to volunteer information.

“...her name was Hope Spring.” Salad said. “She tried to make me fall in love with her on a cash bet. I... don't even know if she succeeded or not. I destroyed the 'evidence', so she couldn't collect.”

“Evidence?” Big Mac asked, tone a bit cold.

“She spent a whole two months pandering to me. I was... pretty bad. Like, worse than I was when I first got here. Much worse. It took a while, but she got to know me. I didn't have any friends at the time, so after a while I kind of stopped fighting her.

“...she... her special talent was cheering sad ponies up. I have no idea how you can have a talent like that and turn out like she did, but... she had it, and used it. Did things like take me swimming, buy me coffee sometimes... said she thought we were dating when I asked her why she was bothering. It was all downhill from there.

“She had me in her bed. Kissed me a bit, and then started going to town. She didn't get very far, some foreplay... I couldn't really think about anything until her actual friends, including her real marefriend, came bursting out of a closet with a camera and took pictures. Said she stood to make a cool two hundred bits from those. I... hurt them. I wanted to kill them. I think the only reason I didn't do worse than I did was because I didn't want my parents to be ashamed of me.”

She felt Fluttershy hug her from behind, and Big Mac reached out for her, and she was soon wrapped in forelegs and wings.

Salad didn't feel like crying anymore though. She hadn't felt like crying ever since they left Cheerilee's.

“Even if she couldn't give pics, everypony still believed her when she said it happened. She just didn't get the money. Others tried to do what she did a few times, but I overheard them talking about it later and shut them down. Others tried after that, but I didn't give them the chance. Then I dropped out of school and finished it with my parents. After that I said I wanted to find Ivan, so they got me prepared and sent me off.”

“...all that, because of a wing?” Fluttershy asked, nuzzling her.

“Maybe.” She said. “Some of the other attempts were from ponies that were a part of Hope Spring's crowd. So, it might be that there were just a few jerks. Maybe it was because I was such a crazy tightly packed ball of hate at the time. I don't even know. I just gave up after I thought everypony in that building was out to get me.

“I... just don't know at this point. But I don't care anymore.”

“Ya're alright now?” Mac asked, reaching around and pulling both of the mares in.

“Yeah.” Salad said. “I'm... home now. And she doesn't matter anymore, 'cause I, uh...”

“Mm?” Fluttershy prompted, stretching out her wings as far as they could go, managing to cover some of Big Mac as well.

“...I love you.” Salad finished. “Both of you.”

“Same here.” Mac said, holding them a little tighter. Fluttershy muttered something they couldn't even really make out, but the message was clear.

“So...” Salad said. “Now that we're all official and stuff, wanna rut?”

Fluttershy made a squeaking noise like somepony put a vice on her lungs. Mac on the other hand chuckled.

“Yer one of a kind, Sally.”

“No arguments.” She returned. “So. Wanna?”

“...wait.” Mac said, pulling back to look down at her with an eyebrow raised as far as he could reach it. “Ya're serious?”

“Well yeah.” She said. “I know for a fact both of you held back on doing anything because I was like, all conflicted and stuff. That's gone now, so stop holding back. Let's do it like they do on the discovery channel.”

Fluttershy squeaked again, and Salad knew the yellow pegasus would never be able to look at the discovery channel the same way. Ever.

She smirked. Somehow, that felt like an accomplishment.

“...ain't this a little sudden?” The stallion pressed, causing Salad to roll her eyes.

“Dude, I held you two back since we started this thing. I think you've earned having it all at once. Come on, I'm willing. Stop being such a filly about it and do me.”

“Sally, just... stop for a sec” He said. “Yer doin' this cause ya think ya left us blueballed?”

“That's one reason.”

“Ya shouldn-”

“One reason I said. I just said I loved you, so why shouldn't I want this?”

“But-”

“Alright, fine, you don't want to. I get that. I'll just do it with Shy, and you can watch. You're on board, right Shy?”

“meep”

“See? She's co-operating.”

“...do ya even know what to do?” He asked, shuffling back as Salad turned over toward the other pegasus.

“I bet I can figure it out. Look at her. Doesn't she look user friendly?”

“meep”

“Ah think she looks like she's about ta be run over by a speeding manticore.”

“That'll pass. We're about to do sex things. All over her, um... body, and stuff.”

“Really.”

“If you don't think I can, fine, I'll go take out a book at the library. I'll just say that it's for you.”

“Uh-huh.”

“Cause you seem to need a road map to my body after all, since you obviously don't know what to do with it. Otherwise you'd be doing it.”

“Yer havin' way to much fun with this.”

“Eh, feels kinda liberating.” Salad said, turning back. “All this time, interested in absolutely nopony, and then suddenly I've got you two all to myself and I'm ready to actually do something about it. I feel...” She paused, smirk fading as she seemed to come to some epiphany.

“...ya feel...?”

“I'm... happy.” She said. “Really happy. All the stuff holding me back is gone now, and, uh... And I want some lovin'. I want you. Do you honestly not want to?” Her good mood faded as she looked up at him, expression becoming guarded again.

Nnnope, can't have that.

“Ah didn't say that.” He said. “Frankly, the only reason we're not already sleepin' it off is 'cause Ah'm tryin' ta figure out if this is right.”

“...what'd be wrong about it?”

“Maybe yer state o' mind or somethin'. Ah don't know. It just came outta nowhere. Can't Ah be skeptical? Seems reasonable ta me.”

“...yeah, I guess...”

“I love ya too.” He said. “An' Ah will if yer sure. Fluttershy probably will too once she gets back from wherever ya sent her.”

“...I'm sure.” She said. “I am.”

“Great.” He said. “You up fer it too, Fluttershy?”

“U-um...”

“Back with us now?” Salad asked.

“Y-yes... I, um...”

“...just because I'm jumping the gun, doesn't mean you have to.”

“N-no... I wouldn't mind.” She smiled, softly. “I actually... kinda want... maybe... umyes...”

“...I'm pretty sure that's consent.” Salad said. “Like, eighty-three percent sure.”

“Close enough.” Mac decided. “So, Fluttershy, hate to ask, but ya done this before?”

“...a few times.” the yellow pegasus replied, shrinking back a bit and blushing. “I, um... was in flight school at the time. Rainbow Dash said... she wanted to make sure her first time was with somepony she could trust. And she said that I could trust her, too. It took a little while for me to agree, but... she, um...

“...she said she wanted to make sure I wouldn't get hurt by making a mistake with it. And... she said she wanted to make me feel beautiful.”

“...seems a little... I dunno, sensitive for her. I didn't think she could do that.” Salad said.

“She can.” Fluttershy said. “And... she did. I don't regret sharing that with her. I'm... happy I did, really.”

“Yeah?”

“I... want to make you feel beautiful too.” Fluttershy confessed, nuzzling her nose to nose.

“Givin' me a tough act to follow there, Fluttershy.”

“Oh?” Salad said. “You got something too?”

“Well, mah first time was actually... heh...”

“You're getting embarassed? Really? You?” Salad laughed at his sheepish expression, turning back to him and poking him in the chest. “C'mon, spill. Do it.”

“Welp... It was some years back... Ah do things to help sometimes. Fixin' stuff. One day, she asked me to fix her fence.”

“She?”

“I ain't gonna spoil the end.” Mac said, making Salad pout. “So, Ah was... pretty awkward back then. Couldn't barely talk to anypony at all. Ah was nearly done, an' she came out with a glass o' lemonade, struck up a conversation. Talked about how Ah was probably pretty sought after. 'No ma'am', Ah said, and she seemed pretty surprised.”

“Sounds like she was buttering you up.” Salad said.

“Probably. Though when Ah stop ta think about it... she was pretty sincere 'bout it all. Kind. Just havin' fun at first...”

“At first?”

“Well...” He continued, “Ah finished mah drink, kept workin' as we talked, an' as Ah was finishin', she asked if Ah had mah eye on anypony.”

“This is kinda playing out like a-”

“Believe me, Ah know.” He said, chuckling. “So Ah said Ah didn't, not really. Didn't talk to anypony really. Spent most o' my time on the farm. So she asked if'n Ah at least thought anypony was handsome, or pretty. 'Yes ma'am' Ah said. But Ah told her that Ma always said it weren't enough ta be pretty or handsome. Good to find out if they're beautiful first, underneath the looks.”

“She smiled then, an' Ah finished up the fence. Asked her if Ah could do anythin' else for her. She asked if Ah could really spare the time. Told her Ah had the whole day to mahself.”

“Scandalous.”

“Quiet you.” he said, huffing a laugh into Salad's mane. “So she asked me if Ah wanted to come in outta the noontime heat, maybe have another drink while she saw 'bout payin' me.”

“Really scandalous.”

“Yeah, kinda was, in hindsight.” He said. “Ah heard stories 'bout scenarios like that at the time, but pushed 'em outta mah head since it seemed too good to be true. So, anyway, Ah did follow her in, sayin' that no payment was necessary, but I really could've gone for another glass o' lemonade. Hot summer day, long walk back to the farm... seemed like a fair deal to me.

“So we talked over another glass 'bout this an' that. Nothin' interesting 'till she asked me why nopony was pursuing an attractive specimen like mahself. Ah replied with somethin' like 'yer flatterin' me', or somethin'. Ya've heard it before Ah'm sure. She insisted. Then she mused out loud that if that's the case, Ah probably had no experience in the matter. 'No ma'am', Ah said.

“So, she looks me in the eye and says she thinks it's a darn crime that Ah've gone unnoticed, and Ah should get mah dues fer attention. 'No ma'am' Ah said. Told her that if nopony felt like comin' after me, that was their business. So she said 'well, what if Ah wanted to have ya all to mahself, right now?'”

“O-oh my...” Fluttershy said, red as a beat. “H-how... forward...”

“Ah thought so. Couldn't do much but gape like just about the most confused goldfish ya ever did see. She said that if nopony else wanted mah company, it was their loss, and she wanted to take the afternoon to make me feel wanted before sendin' me home. And Ah didn't say no.” He said, smiling a bit fondly.

“So... then?” Salad asked, lightly flushed. It looked nice, he thought, against the pink of her coat.

“Yeah, then. Was real gentle with me at first, till Ah got the hang of it. Spent the whole afternoon with her, tryin' ta make sure she felt as appreciated as Ah did.”

“A whole afternoon? Like, what, five hours?”

“Six an' a half. Oh we took breaks.” He said whistfully. “Loads of 'em. But there's a lot to be said 'bout earth pony stamina. Me an' her are still good friends to this day.”

“...so...” Fluttershy said, not able to look him in the eye. “W-who...?”

“Mayor Mare.” He replied with a chuckle. “Ah nearly missed dinner that day. She sent along a note sayin' Ah nearly fixed up the entire house. Said Ah was a real gentlecolt. Now, this was just a bit before mah parents passed on, ya see. So Ma was happy Ah made mahself useful in such a kind way, an' gave me an extra slice o' pie after the meal. But Pa... he knew the second Ah walked in that door that Ah grew up a bit since that mornin'.”

“Oh wow, did it get awkward?” Salad asked, anticipating something funny.

“Well... he asked me how 'fixin' the plumbin' went. An' winked. He knew alright. So Ah told him 'complicated-” Salad burst out laughing and he paused as she rode it out.

“...Complicated, Ah said. But real worth the trouble.”

“I bet it was!” Salad sniggered, and Fluttershy gave an amused smile.

“So he clapped me on the back, told me ta head on up ta bed, an' said that he was proud an' all, but not to bring any of my 'work' home with me while mah sisters were around.”

“Be thankful your dad was cool. My dad would've used that to destroy me. Over and over again.”

“No doubt there.” He said.

There was a pause, as the three tried to decide where to go from there.

“...so... how do we start this?”

“How do ya wanna start?” Mac asked.

Salad didn't say anything, instead studying his face in a way that seemed familiar.

Without warning, she moved forward.

It wasn't quite a lunge, but it was rather forceful. As such though, their snouts bumped, and their teeth clacked, and Salad grunted as she retreated, nose wrinkled in annoyance and no small amount of embarrassment.

“What was that?” Mac couldn't stop himself from asking.

“I was kissing you, stupid.”

“In mah experience, they don't hurt as much as that did.”

“Well in my experience, buck you.”

“Ah wouldn't say that's yer experience just yet...” He said with a chuckle. “We got all night, so calm down. Slower.”

She pursed her lips in thought, and perhaps a bit in preparation, and took his face in her hooves.

She moved in and stopped a millimeter from his lips, hesitating a moment.

When she kissed him, it was slow like he asked. Clumsy too, but that was par for the course.

It ended when she pulled back, half lidded and a little dazed.

“Good for you?” He asked, and she nodded slowly. He smiled, nuzzling her.

“Fluttershy? Ya want a turn too?” He asked, leaning to nuzzle into Salad's throat, and she let a slight sigh escape at the feel of his breath.

Salad was unaware as to when she had closed her eyes, and decided to open them only to see Fluttershy now over her, and lightly pressing her into the bed.

Salad couldn't help but recall the last time she was in that very situation, but it truly didn't matter anymore. She reached up with a hoof, resting it on Fluttershy's cheek.

The other pegasus smiled, conveying overwhelming affection as she lowered herself into Salad's forelegs. The kiss was light as a whisper, and lasted a few tender seconds before Salad moaned as she wrapped her fores around her neck and pulled her in...

--

Salad's eyes opened to discover she wasn't alone in bed.

Normally, whenever she slept with them, Red would get up with the sun and leave them without waking them up. And Fluttershy would get up and start making breakfast, whistling with a few birds, and Salad would wake up to the song in an empty bed, eat, and head out to help on the farm.

Red seemed to be sleeping in today, as Salad could see the sunrise was finishing up.

...holy buck, we have a routine...

They'd probably have to shower or something. Especially Red, since he'd have to make sure he didn't face his family smelling like last night. Maybe he'd stay for breakfast, and she could actually walk him to the farm for a change.

Now that Salad had pulled her head out of her plot, she wondered if it meant he'd be spending all his nights with them. He talked about how much the walk didn't bother him over and over again.

And the bed's big enough...

Maybe after his sister got back, the pressure would be off, and he could actually... properly move in with them?

...this is my life now. She realized, warm despite the chill mornings always seemed to carry.

She lay down again, fitting herself back in position.

This is... our life now...

She was glad they were asleep for this. If they had saw the smile she had at the thought, she'd never live it down.

One Step Forward

Chapter One: One Step Forward
or
Two Steps Way Back

“Hey Red.”

Big Mac bucked the tree he was working on and turned to greet the only pony who ever called him ‘Red’. He supposed he didn’t mind since he didn’t want to know what else she could call him.

“Howdy Salad. How are ya?”

“Fine.” She said. “Bored.”

Big Mac shrugged. “Not a lot Ah can do about that.” He said, lumbering to another tree and giving it a buck too.

Salad pulled an apple out of one of the buckets.

“I’m hungry.”

“That’s nice.” He said, giving another tree a buck.

“…you’re gonna make me ask?”

“That’s normally how ya get things ya want.” Another buck.

Salad sighed. “Fine. Can I have an apple?”

“Ya didn’t eat before comin’ over here?”

“The shopping needs doing. Half the reason I’m out.” She reached her wing into her bags, and pulled out her wallet, dangling from where she had somehow looped it’s drawstring around the limb.

“Look, you want me to pay for it?”

“…Are ya askin’ me that just so Ah’ll give it to ya?”

“Yes.”

“…just take it.” Big Mac said. “No more freebies though. You want apples, work for ‘em or get ‘em at the stand in Ponyville.”

“Oh, work for them?” Salad asked, taking a large crunchy bite out of the fruit. “That’d be a good way to pass the time.”

“So’s grocery shopping.”

“This way I can get food without paying for it.”

“Now who said-“

“You did.” Said the pegasus as she trotted up to another tree. “So, any trick to hitting them?”

“…show me yer hooves.” Big Mac said. Salad rolled her eyes.

“I don’t wear the cleats all the time. Just when I’m out looking for trouble.” To placate him, she lifted a foreleg anyway. “See?”

“…Hm.” The stallion grunted. Salad took that as a ‘go ahead’.

“Great. So how’s this work?”

“Ya use yer connection with the earth ta find the sweet spot on each tree. Then ya buck it. Apples fall out.”

“No kiddin’?” Salad asked. “Well what if you don’t have a connection to the earth?”

“Wing it.” Big Mac said with a smirk as he bucked another tree.

“Oh, look at you, the most clever stallion in the world.” Salad snarked, looking her tree over.

Big Mac stopped a moment to watch as she surveyed the wood. Then she held her apple in her mouth as she turned and bucked it for all she was worth.

The tree emptied about half it’s apples into the buckets, but Big Mac could tell there could’ve been more if Salad had more muscle on her.

“…how’d ya manage that?”

“You and your ‘connection with the earth’ buck the same spot every time.” She said through the apple as she bucked the other half out. “You and your cowpony of a sister left marks.”

“…Ya get an apple for every five trees ya buck empty. If that’s what yer after.”

“An apple every four trees. You are getting my extremely sought after company out of it after all.”

“…seven trees.” The stallion said.

“Maybe I’ll just keep bucking and take what I think I earned.” Salad answered between bites.

“Careful ma’am.” Big Mac said. “Or we might have a problem.”

“Only if I’m unreasonable.” Said the pegasus as she raised an eyebrow. “You don’t think I’d fleece my only friend in this town, do you?”

“…Really?”

“Well Ivan’s family and sort of doesn’t count. And his marefriend’s spending more time with him then she does with me. Which I totally understand, but still. She and I kind of have more of an ‘understanding’ at the moment then actual friendship.” She tossed the finished apple core somewhere as she made her way to another tree. “You’re the only other pony in this whole place that has some sort of idea who I am. Well… except for those fillies Ivan likes, but you get what I’m saying.”

“Ah do.” The stallion said as he watched her buck another tree.

“So yeah. You’re part of a very exclusive club. That’s worth at least a few apples here and there, isn’t it?”

“Don’t push it now.” Big Mac said. “Most ponies have a bit more history before they get free apples.”

“Did you not see the free apple I just finished eating?”

“…tch.”

“Now come on, I’m taking the harvest if I buck more trees then you. That’d be reasonable I think.”

“…That it would, if ya owned the land, trees, and crop.”

“Keep your logic out of my plans.

“What happened ta not ‘gettin’ fleeced’?”

“I’m a mare. We’re known to change our minds when it’s convenient.” Salad answered, bucking another tree.

Big Mac raised an eyebrow, but decided thinking that one over was more trouble then it was worth.

He’d settle for bucking five times the trees the pegasus did anyway. Maybe her mouth wouldn’t run quite so much after.

--

Salad didn’t get tired as quickly as Big Mac suspected she would. Probably in part because she was pretty much in shape, he mused.

Her stamina paled in comparison to his own though. It wasn’t too long before she was resting and making conversation with him while she munched another apple.

“So how’ve you been?”

“Good.”

“…well that’s uninteresting.” She said as she tossed another core away. “Nothing happens to you, does it?”

“Lookin’ at ponies like yer brother, Ah’m rather glad it don’t. It’s more trouble then Ah care for.”

“…good point.”

“What about yerself?”

“Could be better. Scootaloo keeps trying to steal my bayonet.”

“…huh.”

“What’s worse, I’m probably going to have to put up with her a lot. I’ll have to keep it locked down all the time.”

“Well as long as she’s tryin’ to spend time with Ivan, Ah gu-“

“Oh no, not just that.”

“What, is she hangin’ with you now?” Salad scoffed.

“As if. The only reason Ivan hasn’t adopted her yet is because he’s working on getting a bracer. Then he can get a place to live and provide for a foal.”

“…that right?”

“Pretty much as soon as Ivan’s a warder, I’m ‘Auntie Salad’. Really didn’t expect it to be this soon.” The pegasus shrugged. “At least I don’t have to change any diapers yet.”

“Ya’d do that?”

“…well no, I wouldn’t. I guess I’m happy I don’t have Ivan needing help that involves diapers. Then he’d ask me and I’d have to laugh at him while sa-” Salad paused. “…you know what, I just realised I don’t care at all about any of that.”

“Ya don’t care about bein’ an aunt?”

“Well I guess if the squirt’s family, I’ll have to actually tolerate her. And maybe teach her a few pegasus tricks in order to give Ivan trouble later.”

“Pegasus tricks?” Big Mac stopped bucking trees for a moment. Considering his rather floundering social life, not a lot of other tribal magic really came up in conversation. He found himself mildly interested.

“I can’t teach her to fly at all, but that’s kind of already taken care of. I can teach her to be pretty mobile when she’s not in the air though. Dad’s a pegasus warder, and he taught me a thing or two.”

“Yeah?”

“I jump by using the air around me as a spring board. It’s a bit more complicated then that, but… well that’s kind of what it amounts to. A lot of pegasi take off to fly that way. Great way to go from zero to fast in a hurry.” Salad flexed her wing from where she lay, smirking.

“So if you know how to jump forward or sideways instead of just up, you’re pretty much the fastest thing since sound.”

“Did somepony say Rainbow Dash?”

“No.” Salad said, good mood seemingly vanished. “Go away.”

The chromatic pegasus landed and reclined on a cloud conveniently placed nearby.

“Aw come on, don’t be like that, you know you don’t hate the Dash. Hey, why don’t you tell me what happened after I left when that one unicorn tri-“

“How about no. Next question?”

“…yeah I’ve got a few now.” Dash said, sitting up and looking down at her curiously. “Did I interrupt anything? Or did I do anything wildly offensive when I introduced myself? What the hay is your problem?”

“My problem is that a technicolor featherduster came out of bucking nowhere and won’t take a hint.”

“…Alright, fine.” Dash said, scowling and spreading her wings. A few seconds later she was halfway to Ponyville.

“…what was that?” Big Mac asked. “Did she do anythin’ at all to make ya angry?”

“When she introduced herself the first time, she started talking herself up like she was a freaking Wonderbolt. Half the stuff that comes out of her face is probably self-appreciation. I don’t want to spend more time then I have to around a moron like that.”

“Well maybe if ya got to know her-“

“More trouble then it’s worth.” Salad dismissed.

“…if ya say so.” While Big Mac definitely didn’t agree with Salad’s methods, she could make her own mistakes as far as he was concerned. “Ya might want to be careful ya don’t reflect badly on Ivan though.”

“As if I could. The town’s practically eating out of his hooves after he made the front page back at the incident.”

“Ah’m just sayin’.” Salad sighed.

“Well whatever.” She got up and withdrew a small sack out of her saddlebags. “I wasn’t counting. I won’t take too many.” Big Mac watched as she trotted up to a bucket and started taking apples.

He was quite sure she took a few more then she was entitled to, but he didn’t mind too much.

“Headin’ out?”

“Yeah. Shopping has to get done sometime I guess. Later, Red.”

“See ya.” He said as he watched her go.

--

Ivan crumpled painfully against the tree Memry threw him at. To his credit though, he could still move enough to get out of the path of her falling tail.

“Twilight, I told you to call me when they started doing this again!” Dash complained as she landed next to the unicorn. “Hey, why are you watching? You said you thought this was ’juvenile’ and stuff.”

“Well, I’m the one who taught Ivan most of his spells, so I kind of want to see them in ac- oh for the Sun’s sake, Ivan! You have a freeze ray and she’s a reptile! Two plus two!"

“Not working!”

“Well maybe if you hit her with it?!”

“You try!” Twilight saw Memry’s head whip around and grin wildly at the prospect of another playmate.

“…shutting up.” The lavender mare said.

“Good!” Ivan replied, firing a blasting spell.

“…Wow, they’re really going at it today.” Dash said as the fight unfolded. She noticed the group of fillies cheering nearby. “Has he had to put up with angry parents and setting an example again?”

“Not since Memry told them how disappointed she'd be if Ivan couldn’t play with her anymore.”

“She kind of wins arguments, doesn’t she?”

“Yeah, well, you try arguing with a lamia.”

“Eh, if it’s impossible, I bet I co-look out!” Rainbow barely had time to scoop Twilight up and fly out of the path of a violently flying Memry.

“…think he did that on purpose?” Twilight asked.

“Nah, he’s the nice sibling.”

“…he is?”

“Have you talked to Salad?” Rainbow asked as she set Twilight down a fair distance away.

“Well no. Why?”

“I just got back from doing that. I barely got to say two things before she told me to just buck off.”

“Watch your language arou-“

“I would if they could hear me. I’m serious though! I was there for like two seconds and she told me to scram!”

“…And you didn’t do anything? Didn’t crash into her or something she had been preparing for months with meticulously grown ingredients-“

“Twilight, you’ve really got to learn to let things go. That was like two yea-“

“Two weeks.”

“That’s basically two years. And I made it up to you! We hugged and wrote a letter to the princess and I’m going off on a tangent, Salad’s… that one word you used. That one time. Rarity was like, really cranky? It was a different C word though.”

“Cantankerous?”

“Yeah that. That sounds bad and it’s totally her.”

“Oh?” Said Ivan as he walked over. Memry was off to the side pouting, meaning the stallion had probably asked for a time out. Dash turned to him without missing a beat.

“Yeah! I barely said anything to her and she told me to buck off! And the last time I had talked to her was on the Megapony. I didn’t do anything wrong or crash into any stupid experiment, or anything!”

“…Sorry.” Ivan said.

“I’d rather hear it from her.”

“Unlikely.” The stallion huffed. “Stubborn.”

“Fine, I’ll take it I guess. Just try to make sure she doesn’t try that bunk with anypony else. They might not be as understanding as me.”

--

Fluttershy was having a wonderful day. A warm breeze seemed to be endless as it swept through the countryside, weaving through her feathers in just the right way. Angel was oddly well behaved, none of the animals had gotten into any fights, and grumpy Mr. Grizzles was finally getting along with the rest of her animal friends!

She wasn’t prancing, though she did have a bit of a spring in her step. Or as much spring as she was comfortable having in public. It felt nice to cut loose.

As much as she disliked wandering into the crowded market, her weekly grocery run was something she rather liked, stocking up her cottage with all sorts of treats for her animals. Considering how nice they’d been acting lately, she’d be buying more then normal this time.

The shopping always took several trips since she did it herself, but the walk was always nice, and the sun and wind were perfect.

Yes, she was going to enjoy today quite a b-

“Oof!” She grunted as she bounced off of something. She berated herself for not paying attention to where she was going as she looked and oh sun she ran into another pony were they hurt today was ruined-

She recognised the pony as her frantic thoughts started to sort themselves out. She didn’t remember if she ever got the other pony’s name what if she forgot it that would be so rude she would be absolutely hated by every pony that pony knew-

“Watch where you’re going.” Salad said with a glare.

Oh moon she has one wing how did you not notice that before what if it hurts and you made it worse when you bumped her quick say something-

“Um…”

“What?” Salad had given up on the other pegasus and was about to leave. She barely heard the timid squeak of Fluttershy seeking attention.

“I’m… I-is your win-“

“Are you about to ask about my wing?” The other pegasus growled. her plumage is ruffled she’s pawing the ground she’s resisting the urge to vaporise you somepony please help-

“Y-yes!” Oh dear why did you say that it was obviously a bad idea this is why you don’t go outside you always do this-

“So I’ll tell you how this is gonna play out.” Salad said, glad the other pegasus was visibly terrified. It’d make everything a lot easier. “I’m going to turn around and walk away. You’re never going to talk to me again. Nopony gets hurt. Sounds good?”

Fluttershy could do nothing but nod.

“Spectacular.” The pink pony turned and left, grumbling under her breath.

Fluttershy managed to get full control of her mind and body five minutes later, and used them to bolt back to her cottage and lock the door.

--

Salad, quite skilled by that point at heckling and recognizing quality fruits, vegetables, and bread, managed to save herself quite a hefty sum of bits once everypony stopped staring at her back.

She really hoped her bargains weren’t out of pity.

Either way though, the stares weren’t as bad as they once were, so maybe Ponyville was getting used to her?

She sighed, wondering how much spontaneous conversation she’d have to put up with once the word got out she was related to the pony currently in the limelight. Several idiots crawling out of the woodwork going ‘what’s Ivan like, I notice you only have one wing and that’s obviously something you want to talk about or you’d hide it or something, you’re so brave’.

Intruders had been easy to deal with so far. Most shut up when they realised they were saying every last wrong thing imaginable. Rainbow Dash left when told to. That other one-

…she now remembered where she had last seen that yellow pegasus.

She foresaw a loud tiring day in her future where several protective friends swept down on her like a storm.

She made a mental note to start wearing her cleats more often.

Long Overdue

Chapter Ten: Long Overdue
or
There Isn't A Rating High Enough For If She Were Caught

The day’s work had been finished, Salad hadn’t come to call, and he didn’t need, or feel like, going into town.

So it was that Big Mac had himself settled under the oldest tree in the orchard, reading.

“Interesting title.”

Mac recognized the accent, and got to his hooves, nodding politely. “Interesting read too, ma’am.”

Riposte eyed him up and down in a way that made him wonder if he’d have to deal with a hurricane in seven seconds if her husband happened upon them.

…though she did it in a more analyzing way, than the ‘well hello there’ way he’d seen on occasion. Like sizing up a slice of meat.

…He decided not to wonder if that was better or worse.

“I like ze strong ones.” Riposte said, after a moment. “Does Sally?”

“Ah wouldn’t know.” Mac replied.

“Non, I suppose you would not. She is tight lipped about such things.”

“All sorts o’ things, really.” He replied with a shrug. “Are ya here to threaten me?”

“Oh, how funny.” The mare tittered. “If you did somehow find a way to prey on my daughter, why would I presume to take ze satisfaction from her? I am not so inconsiderate.”

“Yer husband is. Seven seconds he said.”

“You must understand.” The mare answered, eyes dancing with mirth. “He has been waiting years for ze chance to threaten a hopeful paramour. Also he exaggerates. His fastest time is eleven seconds flat.”

“Good to know.” Mac said.

“Why do you read zat book?” She asked, tilting her head. “I have, myself, and I do think every pony should at some point. Still, I am curious.”

“Ah found out a while back Ah’m missin’ out on things that’re common knowledge. That, an’ Salad’s other friend has a pair and is her total opposite. Hopin’ this’ll keep me from steppin’ in somethin’ Ah shouldn’t. Among other things.”

“Other things?” Riposte asked, a mocking hoof over her mouth. Mac figured he should’ve phrased that better.

“Salad’s tough to read at the best o’ times, and her other friend is more skittish than a deer in a timberwolf pack. Granny always said an ounce o’ prevention is worth a pound o’ cure.”

“Wise mare.”

“Eeyup.”

“I would like to meet zis other friend. Would you tell me where she lives?”

“Next to the library, that’ll be the house that’s also a tree, there’s a road that leads outta the town proper. Follow that and ya should see a cottage on the edge o’ the forest. Careful ya don’t go into the forest though. Dangerous place.”

“You would tell me a place is dangerous after what you saw yesterday?”

“Mah granny also says fate’s easy to tempt.” Big Mac shrugged. “Ivan treads careful, an’ you know how tough he is.”

“Ahh, my big strong boy…” the mare giggled to herself. “…very well. I will take your advice.”

“Ya think ya can find the place alright?”

“I think so. Ponyville is small.” She wrinkled her nose. “And poorly named. Unoriginal.”

“Eeyup.”

“Good day.”

“An’ you.”

The mare saw herself off of the property, and Big Mac got back to his book, wondering if it was wise to send somepony as bloodthirsty as Memry to see Fluttershy.

…

Well, Ah done goofed. Mac decided, slipping a bookmark into his originally relaxing afternoon and starting back to the house.

It’d probably be a good idea if he found Salad, and maybe mentioned it casually in conversation while running an errand. Just an ounce of prevention.

All that was left was to ask Granny Smith if there was anything that needed doing in town. Might as well be productive about it.

--

Fluttershy thought for a moment that Ivan had come by, as she spied the green unicorn in the distance. Then she noticed smaller details, like how the color of the pony’s coat and mane were a shade or two lighter, and how she could actually tell they was lighter since they weren’t covered in a coat and hat.

A strange pony was approaching her home.

Alright, don’t panic. Maybe she has a question about animal care. Then again, I don’t think I’ve seen her before. So would she even have a pet here?

…so it probably isn’t about animals. She’s probably here for you.

…alright, maybe just a little panic.

“Ah, ‘allo!” The mare greeted joyfully.

“H-hello.” Fluttershy replied, setting down the empty basket she was carrying. “C-can I help you?”

“Would you be the friend my little Sally has befriended?”

“S-Sally?”

“My daughter. Salad Shooter.”

“O-oh, you’re her-“

'They attacked eachother.'

'The aftermath left a crater in the park.'

'Just so happens his mother’s even crazier then he is.'

“-oh my Celestia.” Fluttershy had herself behind a locked front door before the mystery mare even had time to blink.

…now all she had to do was wait for Rainbow Dash. Somehow, Rainbow Dash always seemed to know when something terrifying was around.

Either that, or Angel always got her attention somehow.

“Are we hiding from something?”

“Y-yes, there’s a-heeeeeeah-”

“…I am afraid I do not know what that is.” Said the mare, frowning. “And here I thought I was fluent in Equestrian…”

Fluttershy responded by leaping out the nearby window.

“Ah! Come back!”

--

Riposte was confused. She had concluded that there was nothing scary about, which meant that the butter coloured mare was running from her.

…But Riposte had done absolutely nothing before the mare had decided that she was terrifying. In fact, she had only been mildly rattled before she suddenly lost it out of nowhere.

On retrospect, perhaps teleporting into the house after the mare was a bad idea.

On the other hoof, this made for a wonderful game! The mare was quick when she was scared, and she wouldn’t be not scared unless Riposte managed to catch her and explain her anxieties away.

It also helped that her prey looked absolutely adorably scrumptious. She wouldn’t dare involve herself with another pony (without her husband present), but the motivation still drew a smile.

…perhaps nopony would mind if she took just a tiny nibble before returning her?

“Ah, come back my butter mare! We have so much to talk about!” Riposte laughed, prancing down the road after the fleeing pegasus.

Honestly, if she wanted so desperately not to be caught, she would simply fly! Fun for everypony!

--

“Howdy Salad.” Big Mac said when she opened the door.

“Oh, ‘sup Red?”

“We might have a problem.”

Salad’s eyes narrowed as she took in his no doubt guilty expression. “…what kind of problem?”

“The kind of problem where Ah gave yer mom directions to Fluttershy’s cottage.”

“…you… you…” The way Salad gaped at him, it might’ve been a bigger problem then Mac had anticipated.

“…Ah bucked up?”

“You have bucked up. Dad! Get over here!”

“Need something Sally?” Gale approached the doorway. Big Mac wondered if he interrupted anything.

“Mom’s probably out ‘hunting’ again.”

“Oh boy. Alright, stallion or mare?”

“Mare.”

“Scale of one to ten?”

“Eleven.”

Gale whistled appreciatively. “…so why is this a problem? She’ll probably bring Miss Eleven back to share with me.”

“’Miss Eleven’ is pure as snow, more timid than a mouse in a house made out of cats, snakes, and hawks, and will probably be forever scarred by whatever happens. If she isn’t already.”

“This just keeps getting better and better.” Gale paused. “That wasn’t sarcasm.”

“…I hate my family.” Salad muttered as she slipped on her bags. “Red, let’s go.”

“Eeyup.”

--

“Oh my sweet little butterfly, I am looking somewhere to find you!”

Fluttershy started shaking harder, hoping that the leaves she was rustling weren’t altogether that noticeable.

She hoped Ivan wouldn’t mind her borrowing the tree to escape his mother. She’d return it in just the condition she found it, even if she had to stay up here until winter, she’d glue the leaves back into the tree herself if she had to-!

“You are not very good at this game, are you?” the terrifying mare said, looking up at the quivering tree. “I have found you again! Do I win yet?”

“EEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee…”

“Ah, you run again! Round seventeen it is!”

--

Angel saw a yellow blur speed into the house from where he was sitting out front, and facepaw’d. Then he heard the singing.

It was in that weird language mother spoke sometimes, so he couldn’t understand it. And around the bend came a green unicorn mare bouncing on her hooves.

…so his mother was being chased by a pony that was treating her fear like a game.

Salad Shooter was now number two on his list. And this mare was stepping into his territory.

“Ah! ‘Allo little bunny! Which way did the pretty pegas-“ Angel cut her off by doing what he did whenever a green unicorn ticked him off, and threw his carrot at her open mouth.

Whip-CRACK went a violet blur, and the projectile fell some distance behind her in two halves.

“Ooooh, now what was zat for? How many friends have you made zis way?” Well, that failed. Though he was surprised it worked the first time, so he supposed it was all good.

Angel swept his paw in a way that plainly told the mare to clear out.

“Oh, non. I have business with zat mare. I cannot leave until I am finished with her.”

Angel’s eyes narrowed. Then he pulled out a tiny trumpet.

“…what is zi-“

Angel didn’t know how to play. He had however made sure every animal in the area knew what to do when they heard the blaring note.

Birds, racoons, squirrels, and a monkey poked their heads out of trees, deer, bunnies, and wild boars walked out from behind bushes, turtles and frogs crawled out from the pond in the back…

There was a low rumble of a bear from somewhere unseen.

Within moments, a hundred or so pairs of eyes were trained on the encroaching threat.

“…I see you have made many friends.” The mare said, truly surprised.

Angel bit off half of a new carrot, and chewed as he waited for the mare to go crawling back to Ponyville.

“I only want to talk with her, little rabbit. You do not need to protect her from me.”

Angel’s ears lay back as he jabbed the carrot in the direction of the cottage.

“…I admit I may have surprised her. I did not think it was such a serious matter.” Riposte shook her head. “I only want to meet my daughter’s friend. If you are concerned, you could introduce me?”

Angel pointed a paw at the sky, in the general direction of the sun.

“…tomorrow?”

Angel nodded. Though the mare was unaware, by tomorrow he could have the entire area trapped, barricaded, and locked down easily by then.

“Hm…” The mare thought something to herself. “What if my daughter were here? Surely she could help the pretty pegasus calm down.”

Angel raised a furry eyebrow.

“She will probably be here soon.” Riposte said. And as soon as she said that, Angel’s sensitive ears picked up a whistling noise.

“Ah, zat will be her now.”

--

Salad hit the ground nearby, and wondered what she trotted in on.

…probably what might’ve happened if Fluttershy didn’t stop the bunny after Mr. Grizzles went down.

“Can’t go anywhere without causing some kind of incident, can you, mom?”

“It was impossible to prevent.”

“Really? Red didn’t tell you how jittery Fluttershy is?”

“Is zat her name?” Riposte wondered. “…perhaps he might have.” she conceded after a moment.

“And you didn’t do anything potentially startling or frightening?”

“Sally, are you lecturi-“

“Answer the question, mom.”

“…I did.” Riposte murmured, scuffing the ground a little with her hoof.

“...Celestia's plot, I can't take you anywhere. Why are you even here?”

“I wanted to meet your friends.” The unicorn said. “Ivan is not the only reason your father and I are here.”

“Of course he is.” Salad said, frustrated. “Why else would you be here?”

“It has been two years since we last saw you.” Riposte replied. “And I want to know what ponies are a part of your life now that you have friends. Your father and I must trust zem to love you while we are gone.”

“…Is that so?” Salad replied, unsure of how else to respond.

“We’ve got two kids.” Said Gale, walking up beside Red. “Ivan’s kind of a big deal, what with being one of those long lost cases you see in movies and stuff, but we worry about you too.”

“…wait here.” The scarred mare said, trotting past the gate and toward the house.

The animals, deciding the situation was in hand, went back to their homes.

Salad trotted up the stairs, and into Fluttershy’s room.

…the room was as cosy looking as the rest of the house. Somewhat spacious, but Salad imagined she entertained animal guests from time to time. The bed was large, and the sheets and quilt looked warm.

The desk was tidy enough, and there was a bookshelf next to it. Salad wondered what titles the mare liked.

…and she slowly became aware of how little she really knew about her two friends. Granted, she did know a major secret of Fluttershy’s, but she wouldn’t if the circumstances hadn’t demanded it.

Fluttershy seemed to have several sides to her, and Salad was unsure how many more lay under the surface.

And… while she did have a feel for Red’s personality, his personal life was still a mystery.

…she could probably learn more as her parents talked to them. But she supposed there wasn’t much of a rush. She wasn’t about to move on, so there was plenty of time.

…the few minutes of contemplative silence were enough to alert Salad to the quivering breathing coming from underneath the bed.

“Hey. Shy.” Salad was barely aware of the coaxing tone she used, possibly for the first time in her entire life. “It’s me. You’re safe.”

“I-is she gone?”

“…no, she’s outside.”

The bed whimpered. Salad sighed.

“Look. She just wants to meet you. Mom and dad heard you were my friend and wanted to talk to you about stuff.”

“B-but-“

“Just because she said hello to Ivan with a brawl in the park doesn’t mean she’d do that to just anypony. Dad’s out there too. So’s Red. And that bunny of yours can apparently rally up an army in seconds.”

“A-Angel can do what?” Salad chuckled.

“I’m as surprised as you are. I got here and Angel was standing between the cottage and my mom, and there were animals everywhere giving her the evil eye. What do you do to make them like you that much?”

“I… I don’t know…”

“Come to think of it, Dash was pretty protective too.”

“Um…”

Salad settled onto her stomach, peering under the bed at the slowly relaxing Fluttershy.

“I guess you do kind of have that damsel thing going on. Maybe a little.”

“R-really?” Salad shrugged, as she tried to think of ways to get the mare out from under the bed.

“Are ya alright up here?” Big Mac asked from the doorway to the room.

“We’re alright. Shy’s just…” Salad glanced back at the yellow mare. “…well she’s Shy.”

“Ah can see that. Can Ah come in?”

“Y-yes…” Fluttershy answered just loud enough for him to hear.

“What’s ailin’ ya?” the draft pony asked, standing near the prone Salad.

“S-she… chased me, for…”

“…A while?” Salad guessed, pressing a hoof to her face.

“And she wouldn’t stop… singing… about how she was going to hold me until I burst… or… or something like that, I’m not sure… I didn’t listen that well… Was I rude?”

“I’m going to have to have a talk with her later about harassment.” Salad muttered. “It’s fine. I’ll make sure she keeps her hooves to herself.”

“B-but why-“

“Alright, just…” She tried her best to come up with a way to explain everything that wouldn’t make it all worse. “You’re like a bunny.”

“…but I’m a pegasus.”

“No, like a bunny. You know how a lot of ponies see a little bunny and they’re like ‘oh my Celestia it’s so fuzzy I could die’ and they just want to snuggle it?”

“…yes?”

“Yeah, you’re kind of like that for my mom. She’s… a little out there.”

“…does that mean that you-“ Oh wow she sounded almost hopeful.

“I’m not a lot of ponies.” Salad said quickly, shaking her head. “Look, the point is, that’s what it’s like. I’ll make sure she doesn’t pounce on you or anything. And, and…” Salad’s word probably wouldn’t be enough insurance.

What else…?

“Red’s here.”

“…Eeyup?” The stallion half asked, wondering why that even mattered.

“Red’s here, and you trust him, right?”

“Well yes-“

“So it’ll be fine! Red, tell her it’ll be fine.

“Nnnope.”

“Yeah, so you can oh what the buck Red?!” Salad jumped to her hooves and whirled around, looking Red with an accusatory glare.

“Ya should tell her yerself.” Red said, lazily stretching his neck to either side.

“I just did, and then you went ‘Ah’m a hayseed an’ Ah’m gonna buck it all in the-‘”

“Salad.” Red said, and Salad couldn’t protest after that. “Ah’m sayin’ ya don’t need me to tell her everythin’s gonna be alright.”

“What, should I call Rainbow Dash?”

“…Ya know, if Ah didn’t know any better, Ah’d say ya thought we didn’t trust you.”

“Well why the buck would you? Quit being a jackass about this and ju-“

“I trust you.” Said Fluttershy, now out from under the bed. Salad slowly turned her head to find that the look on the other pegasus’ face was as serious as could be.

“Don’t… don’t joke with me like that.”

“I’m serious.”

“You don’t-“

“Ah do too.” Big Mac said, smiling, and Salad felt aimless emotion welling up against her will. She felt her feathers flex and her heart start racing and she grit her teeth as she tried to fight the situation back under control.

How did it turn into this?

“You… because, yesterday, I-“

“It ain’t nothin’ to do with what ya said yesterday.” Red clarified. “If Ah didn’t, Ah wouldn’t have let ya near Fluttershy. Let alone trust ya with her life.”

Don’t hope.

“I, um…” Fluttershy started, smiling sheepishly. “If I didn’t… I don’t… think I would be a very good friend. So…”

It’ll hurt more if you do.

“You… I…”

“Can’t be that big a shock.” Big Mac said, and Salad was trying to separate her urges to slap that smile off his face, or just leap out the window or, or something! “Ya trust both of us too, don’t ya?”

Just say no. Then you can go back to…

“I… I do…” She said, realizing it for herself as she found herself unable to refuse.

“…still don’t want that hug?”

“Don’t make fun of me you-!” A foreleg wrapped itself around her throat and panic welled up in the back of her mind before she was gently pulled back into a warm body. Another foreleg around her chest, and a set of yellow feathers encompassed her and her mind went blank as she tried desperately to make sense of what was happening.

Before she could get together the presence of mind to do anything about it, she noticed Red getting closer, and both her and Fluttershy were pulled into the large pony’s embrace.

And as her breathing started to calm, she noticed that little paranoid voice in the back of her head had fallen silent.

Just…

Tension seemed to be pulled out of her as she tentatively leaned into the other two ponies. Fluttershy hummed to herself and nuzzled her a little as Red’s body shook them both a bit with a quiet chuckle.

Just this once…

--

“…Do you think they forgot we’re here?”

“Perhaps zey are negotiating.” Riposte answered, looking up at the house.

“…So Sally said something about an eleven out of ten.”

“Oh oui.”

“Huh. No wonder she’s trying to keep her all to herself.”

“She never was good with sharing…”

The front door opened, and Salad poked her head out.

“Hey. You want to meet my friends or not?”

“You were in there for twenty minutes. What took so long?” Gale asked, cocking his head to the side.

“…negotiations?” Salad tried. Gale sighed while Riposte grinned her triumph.

“So what, are we coming in?”

“Fluttershy and me are gonna make dinner. If you don’t mind waiting a bit, we’ll talk over food.”

“Sounds like a plan. I never say no to your cooking anyhow. We could get to know that other one while we’re at it.”

“Well, come on in.” Salad said, opening the door as she turned around and moved back into the cottage.

When Gale walked in, he first noticed Big Mac sitting on the sofa, making himself at home. The white rabbit sat nearby, trying to set his wife on fire with its eyes.

They made small talk for a time before a yellow pegasus timidly made her way into the room.

Gale discretely eyed her. Nice legs, ample flanks, very plush looking wings…

Twelve.

…and now he was more the a little jealous that his daughter had first dibs. On her and on the fine specimen opposite them.

The mare sat herself down next to Big Mac, and fidgeted while she tried to come up with something to say.

…hold the phone…

“I think I recognize you.” Gale said. The mare made a surprised sound, looking up with mild shock. It was adorable. Gale totally understood why Riposte chased this one around.

“O-oh?”

“Fluttershy, right? I’ve seen you in a couple magazines.” And now she was looking ready to bolt.

“Ooh!” Riposte said. “Ze model!”

Big Mac looked like he hadn’t heard about any of it, and he glanced to his side with an ‘is that so?’ look on his face.

“Um… y-yes… F-former.”

“Any particular reason you gave it up?” Gale asked, trying to appear relaxed. While the look of an awkwardly nervous Fluttershy was precious, Sally’d probably try to gut him again if he kept it up.

“I… didn’t like it.”

“…no, I guess you wouldn’t. You don’t really seem the type.”

“Ah guess it’d take time away from yer animals too.” The earth stallion noted, smiling a bit at the mare.

“There are so many! Do you keep them all?” Riposte asked, cheerfully. Fluttershy’s guard fell a little as she embraced a topic she obviously liked to talk about.

“N-not really. Most of them just live closeby. They spend most of their time around here, and s-sometimes help me look for herbs. It’s… it’s almost like another smaller Ponyville, really. And my house is town square. I feed them sometimes, and they help me in return.”

“Sounds delightful.” Riposte said. “I imagine you like animals quite a bit!”

“Understanding them is my special talent.” Fluttershy said. “A-and they’re… um… easier to deal with than a lot of ponies…”

“Considering one of those ponies is in your kitchen, I’d have to agree.” Gale said with a smirk.

“You hurt my feelings dad. I might accidentally burn your share, I’m crying so hard.” Salad called from somewhere unseen.

“See? Threats and bristles. I could have sworn I taught her to take a joke somewhere along the line…”

“You taught me that threats are the only way to make you stop. Especially when I taught you that I’ll follow through.”

“I’m willing to learn from my children. Father of the year!” Gale leaned back, stretching out his forelegs and wings as he tried to look as smug as possible.

Salad cursed in Prench. For some reason, hearing her do that was more satisfying to him then in a language he understood.

Riposte did understand though, and the way she quietly laughed to herself told him everything he needed to know.

He also noticed that Fluttershy blushed hotly at whatever Salad had said. Well that was interesting.

He decided not to tell his daughter that one of her friends knew Prench, on the off chance she wasn't aware. It would probably add up to something hilarious later, even if he wasn’t around to see it.

“And what about you, ‘Red’? I can see why she calls you that, but I don’t know much else about you. Aside from that hurricane thing.”

“Ah pretty much run the farm ya’ll met me at.” The draft pony said. “Ma an’ Pa died in an accident a while back, so Ah ended up takin’ over when Ah was able. We ship our produce all over the place.”

“Oh yeah? Sweet Apple Acres, right? I’ll keep a lookout for the brand.”

“Best apples ya’ve ever had.”

“Here’s hoping.”

And after that, Salad came trotting back into the room.

“Alright, we’ll have a casserole in a little while.” She said as she approached. She took a moment to note the free space on either couch.

She sat herself in the space between Big Mac and Fluttershy, and was plainly hoping neither him or Riposte said anything about it.

Well in that case…

“Picking your new friends over your loving parents?”

“They won’t pinch my cheeks.” She muttered.

“I’m guessing the fact that they’re a former model and a stallion who could bench-press a barn have nothing to do with it? Oh Riposte!” He faked tears like he owed them all money and buried his face in his wife’s mane. “Family love outdone by pure sex appeal! What is this world coming to?!”

“I am this close to throwing you out of a house that isn’t even mine!” Salad growled, feathers ruffling. Unseen, Gale grinned.

His special talent was manipulation in general, as illustrated by the tornado on his flank. If he wanted something to happen, chances were pretty good it would happen in short order.

And right now, he wanted his daughter as flustered as possible. He’d gone far too long without that kind of fun. Also it didn’t work on Ivan so now she had to provide for two.

And his wife, Celestia bless her, was going along for the ride, patting and rubbing his back to ‘comfort’ him. Every day he loved her just a little more.

“She’s not even making a case for herself!”

“Shut up dad!”

Oh this was going to be delicious.

“I thought we raised you better than this!”

“You raised me to be a buckmothering murdertrain. Wanna find out just how well that worked out?”

“She is threatening us!” Riposte sobbed.

“Trying to make herself the alpha mare in front of a pair of ponies she lusts for…” Gale said grimly. “I’ve seen it all before.”

“I don’t-“

“Don’t pretend! I’ve seen the way you eye his flank and her wings!” And that flush on her face wasn’t anger. He’d gone fishing and caught a whopper.

And the best part was, the other two on either side of her knew it.

“Dad why do you always-?!”

“It’s so terrible… we’ll grow old and lonely and all Sally’s going to care about is getti-“

“I’m going to-“

“Ah!” Gale interrupted. “Watch what you say in front of sensitive ears!” He was plainly talking about Fluttershy. And she was so worked up, she wasn’t even thinking about why he would say that.

Here it comes…!

Salad took a ragged breath, opened her mouth, and out came a stream of foreign curses, swears, threats, and oaths that he was quite sure would’ve scared off one of the sisters.

It was all moonspeak to him. Riposte on the other hand was looking more and more impressed by the second, he’d have to remember to ask for a play-by-play later.

It went on for a good three minutes, and she finished, breathing heavily as she tried to collect her now vented mind into something that didn’t demand her father's blood.

Then her daughter turned to the side, possibly worried about how their very shy and quiet host would react to such an outburst, and found her trembling, eyes wide, face red as a beat.

Salad had a split second of dawning horror to realise that Fluttershy was bilingual.

Then the yellow mare fainted.

“Oh buck, Shy, what’s wrong, oh Celestia, Red, help me out here!”

Big Mac sighed, hoof over his eyes as Gale rolled around on the floor, howling laughter.

“Angel? Help?”

The bunny held up a little case of smelling salts.

“Much obliged.”

--

Dinner afterward was… awkward, to say the least.

Gale and Riposte didn’t try anything else, instead swinging around to being the perfect guests, asking other questions about their lives, doing a spectacular job of pretending the whole ordeal hadn’t happened.

Big Mac himself didn’t feel too sore about it. He’d seen worse pranks after all. And it was interesting to find out that Salad spoke another language.

…course, it also lead to him learning that Fluttershy spoke it too. The pegasus still trembled slightly on his left, probably not happy about how she had reacted, speaking only a few words in response to questions. And on her other side, Salad silently seethed, burning in her own embarrassment.

“I didn’t know.” Salad offered after the two parents had left. And Fluttershy looked at her and replied with;

“It’s f-fine…”

“My dad has to be like, the biggest jerk in the history of Equestria.”

“D-Discord.” Fluttershy whispered.

“What?”

“Nothing.”

“Look, are you really alright?” Salad said, looking more and more frustrated with the situation by the second.

Big Mac supposed it was natural. Given the… well the moment they kind of had just a little while beforehand, where they hugged it out for a good few or so minutes before she almost shyly backed off and made an excuse that they needed to deal with her parents. Granted it had been a legitimate excuse, but…

He could tell how… he wouldn’t say happy, but… the moment had satisfied her. And it was something incredibly rewarding to see. He could tell Fluttershy thought so too, the way she had smiled as they went down the stairs.

Salad probably felt she had ruined something there with the outburst, unknowing or not.

“I’m fin-“

“Should I hug you?” Salad blurted out, and both Fluttershy and Big Mac’s eyes widened a bit. Given how adverse she was to contact before…

Oh no, the mare’s desperate.

“Look, if that’s not enough- my dad, just… he screws around a lot with me, if, if you’re actually- I’ll make him apologise- what do you want, I'll-”

“I think you might need the hug more than me.” Fluttershy said, now notably calmer.

“But-“

“Ah don’t think Fluttershy’d lie to ya if she was really upset.” Big Mac explained. The butter mare agreed with a nod.

“I’m, um… surprised… Very surprised.” The vet said, turning her head a little, but maintaining eye contact.

“Ah am, an’ Ah don’t even speak the gol-durn language.” Mac chuckled. “Ya sounded like ya had a lot to say.”

“I… kinda did.” Salad said. Her eyes were still narrowed, and her feathers were still ruffled from earlier. Anger and frustration seemed to be the only emotions she couldn’t hide. Possibly because she never felt she had to.

“S-so…” The scarred mare looked completely lost. Big Mac smiled, and opened his mouth, but Fluttershy beat her to the punch.

“I, um… wouldn’t say no. If you wanted to hug me.” Salad didn’t react much aside from the slight ‘oh buck what do I do’ in her eyes. Though her feathers bushed out just a bit more.

Given that Fluttershy actually was a pegasus, she probably noticed too.

“O-oh… yeah, uh…”

Big Mac was reminded that ponies were technically animals too. So Fluttershy’s talent, a connection to living things, might’ve been the reason why she felt she could just reach out and pull Salad into another hug like before.

Granted, the movement was still slow and searching. Like trying to persuade a scared mouse into not running away. Whatever it was though, it was successful, and while Salad did tense up at the contact, she made no movement to escape.

It was a good half minute before Salad raised her forelegs and hugged the other mare back. Mac couldn’t help but wonder what was going through the pony’s mind.

“Don’t suppose ya’d mind if Ah got in on that again?”

“Um… n-not really, no...”

“Uh, I, I…” And Salad trailed off at that, but it wasn’t a no.

An idea came to mind. A selfish one, but a life without any liberties taken was a boring one. And it’d possibly help with Salad, given that it’d make the hug last just that much longer.

“Ah’m getting’ a little tired o’ just standin’ and sittin’, though. Hope ya don’t mind…”

Both mares were light as feathers, as he scooped them both up in his forelegs and smirked at the surprised squeals and gasps they made as he lay back on the couch and made himself comfortable, both mares nestled against each other on his chest.

Fluttershy probably might’ve fainted again, but given that her attention was mostly on another pony that was somehow even more nervous then her, she was more inclined to give the current situation less thought.

And Salad was still short circuiting from all the affection being lavished on her. She wouldn’t be putting up any fight.

He chuckled to himself, wondering if it was sly of him to get away with cuddling two pretty mares all to himself.

Just playin’ the game. An’ winnin’.

They weren’t just any two mares though. Given how fond he was of them, it wasn’t all that bad.

He held them a little tighter, hoping the message got across. Maybe he’d get lucky, and one of them would hug him sometime.

Minutes passed quickly, and Salad had no excuse to get away this time. If she even wanted to, that is.