Mine Little Pony!

by RocketBrony

Rating: teen
Tags: Crossover, Comedy, Adventure, Tragedy
Length: 2828

Rocket decides to test out his new invention that brings him and his friends into a new dimension: MINECRAFTIA! (Beware of feels)

Rocket has gone too far this time! His newest creation is a portal that will send anypony who walks through it to another dimension. His friends volunteer to test it, but weren't expecting what happened next. Chaos, violence, hunger! All of which unfold before them as their minds slowly come apart. Will anypony survive? If so, what is the point of surviving?

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2013-02-20 21:54:41 UTC

A Whole New World

   Reeses Cup grumbled and groaned as her eyes slowly opened. Her short, messy hair blew in the soothing zephyr of this unfamiliar landscape. She was lying face down in the dirt. Rocket was out of her sight, yet she could hear him cheering gleefully.

   "IT WORKED! IT ACTUALLY WORKED!!! HAHAHA!!!" he yelled, jumping for joy.

   Reeses realized that she and Rocket were not the only two in the vicinity.  Masks, Blueberry Spice, Wrencher, Clockwork and Silent Sunshine were all lying on the ground, moaning in a mixture of confusion and exasperation. Rocket still danced and sang, half of it was either spoken rapidly or in another language all together.

   "What worked? And where are we?" asked Reeses, rubbing her eyes drowsily.

   "You honestly don't recall? I built an interdimensional portal! It sent us here!" he said, still jumping.

   "Where is 'here'?"

   "I don't know. You can't control where an interdimensional portal will take you."

   "Ugh. Wherever we are, I hope there's a food market! I'm starvin'!" said Wrencher in his usual gruff voice. Contrary to his name and cutie mark, the white-coated and orange-maned unicorn does no work at all. He is one of the laziest ponies in Ponyville.

    Rocket looked on his back as if he had something for him, but realized he wasn't wearing saddlebags. He spun around like a dog chasing his tail and sniffed the tall grass.

   "Hmm. That's odd. I could have sworn I was wearing my Gadgetbags. They were packed full of food as well!" he said, scratching his chin ponderingly.

   "You LOST the food!? As in, THE ONLY THING WE HAD TO EAT!!??" screamed Wrencher, grabbing Rocket by the forelegs and shaking him sporadically.

   "No. I think what happened was the wormhole destroyed anything inorganic that passed through it. Including my Gadgetbags full of food."

   "What!? Isn't food organic!?"

   "It would be if I didn't pack processed and dehydrated substances in bags."

   "WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT!?"

   "In case we were teleported to a world with no edible food sources. Or space."

   "Wait, if it's dehydrated food, what if there's no water on the world either?" asked Reeses.

   "I packed a few bottles of water as well."

   "Oh. Well, that would explain the puddle on the floor."

   "Now what do we do?" asked Masks, whose mask was still on.

   "Look for food and shelter."

   "How did Masks' mask survive if it desintegrates anything inorganic?" asked Clockwork. The shaky pegasus was the owner of the clock tower in Trottingham. She lived in it for most of her life up until now and had to endure the persistent tolling of the bell in her ears. She now shook uncontrollably due to the vibrations rattling her brain.

   "I fuse a bit of his DNA with every one of his masks, so it technically is organic."

   Masks was an alicorn who never took off his masks. And when he did, he used a blinding spell on everyone who could see his visage while he changed. At this time, he was wearing a Bulbasaur mask.

   "Hey, has anypony noticed how strange the ground looks?" said Blueberry Spice, rolling her "R"s due to her eastern Appaloosa accent. Nopony had noticed that their surroundings were strangely cubed.

   "Why is everthin' square?" asked Wrencher.

   "Actually it's cubes. They are three-dimensional objects." corrected Rocket.

   "You have no idea how close I am to ramming my hoof down your throat!"

   "And you have no idea how much I would actually like that." he said, winking at Wrencher suggestively.

   The geeky blue pegasus had been bugging Wrencher ever since he moved to Ponyville. Not only was Rocket bisexual, but also a cripple. Both traits Wrencher hated individually. But since he met Rocket, the lazy unicorn finally had a test dummy for his antigravity spells he had wanted to practice. He was having a little too much fun, according to Reeses. She was tired of yelling at Wrencher to pull Rocket off of the ceiling.

   "I would break your wings, but you wouldn't feel anything because you can't even use them, you sorry excuse for a pegasus!"

   "Let's not bring physical deformations into our conversation."

   "BOTH OF YOU SHUT UP!!!" screamed Silent Sunshine. She continued, "We're not going to survive by fighting each other! Let's just put our differences behind us and move on! We've gotta find some food!"

   "She's right. The sun is going down already and who knows what goes on at night in this world?" added Blueberry Spice.

   "Agreed. I'll cut down some wood for a shelter. You guys try to find some food. Be careful, though! We still don't know what's out here."

   They all set out to do their duties, whilst unbeknownst to them, the stars came out... as well as the terrifying and brutally challenging monsters of Minecraftia.

The Shed On A Hill

   Rocket quickly began trying to get some wood for the makeshift shelter he tasked himself to build. Luckily, they had woken up in the middle of a dense, blocky forest. He had no tools, so he was forced to use his bare hooves. He winced in pain as he punched the tree until a single chunk broke. He ducked, waiting for the tree to fall, but it never did. The half above the chunk he broke was suspended in the air. He pondered this for a bit, but dismissed it and continued punching the physics-breaking heretic tree.

   Elsewhere, the others searched for food. Night had fallen a few minutes ago. Since then, they had found ten apples, and nine sugarcane, and were currently attempting to return to Rocket and hopefully the safety of a newly built shelter.

   "Are you sure the forest is this way?" asked Reeses, exhausted from walking.

   "Positive. And maybe the shelter will be up. That would be great!" said Blueberry Spice.

   "Or better yet, the little guy built the shelter and then got eaten by wolves! HA! I would love to see his intestines splattered all over the trees!" said Wrencher gruesomely.

   "Wrencher! Not only is that filthy, but also very rude!" Reeses said angrily.

   "You should be ashamed of yourself!" added Blueberry Spice.

   Blueberry Spice was a young but experienced entreprenuer. She was a unicorn from a village near Appaloosa. It was ravaged by raiders, killing all of her family and breaking her horn. She and Rocket had begun dating almost a month ago. They had grown attatched to each other and they weren't too keen on seperating for the moment. But with the prospect of the joyful reunion to her coltfriend, she had to push the others to trudge onward, no matter their exhaustion. She had a peach/orange coat and a wavy mane of orange and blue that went down to her shoulders.

   "I'm not ashamed of anything. I meant every word of it." snorted Wrencher. "That little 'crooked-colt' has been a thorn in my side since he showed up."

   "Crooked-colt" was his word for a gay stallion. He used it verbatim, especially when Rocket was around. Since he couldn't use "fillyfooler", which is a derrogative term for a lesbian, and there wasn't a solid term for a homosexual male, he decided to come up with one himself.

   "He's not THAT bad. He's a good little peasant." said Masks.

   "Easy fer' you to say. He serves you!"

   "And hits on me. Can't forget about that." he replied, wagging a hoof at Wrencher.

   "I would like to forget tha--" he was cut off by a cubed hand coming out of the ground not two feet in front of them. Afterwards a humanoid figure comprised of cubes followed by another. And another. They all looked relatively the same. They all wore teal shirts and blue jeans and all had the same mechanical gait.

   "ZOMBIES!?" yelled a frightened Reeses, half-asked, half-stated.

   "OH, GOSH! RUN!!!" yelled Clockwork.

   "Where to?" asked Silent Sunshine.

   "THIS WAY! ROCKET'S THIS WAY!" yelled Blueberry Spice, sprinting to where she remembered they came from.

   Within a few minutes, they had made it back to Rocket, who was barely surviving against the onslaught of the undead. He was shoving them away with a stick as he was attempting to work his way inside his shed. After pushing another down and nearly getting grabbed by the tail, he was back inside. The zombies began beating down the door. He knew the door wouldn't last long with them beating it like that. It was already beginning to splinter and crack. He threw down his stick in defeat and cowered in the corner, waiting for his gruesome demise.

   "ROCKET!" yelled Blueberry Spice from outside. "Rocket, are you okay!?" The zombies appeared unfased by the fact that six other ponies stood ten feet behind them.

   He jumped up and ran to the door. "I'm fine! I'm in a bit of a conundrum, though. I could use some assistance!" He grabbed his stick and prepared himself. "I'm going to open the door in thirty seconds. They don't seem to be noticing you. Ambush them from behind! Here's some sticks!" He threw six sticks out of the windows of the door and over the zombies' heads to his comrades.

   They all armed themselves and began smacking the zombies until they groaned no more. Rocket slowly peeked out of the door.

   "They're dead? Are you sure?" he asked shakily.

   Wrencher finished stomping on the last one's head as he said that. "Pretty dead, I'd say." he said, spitting in disapproval.

   "Fantastic!" he said, jumping out of the shed enthusiastically.

   "So. Where's the shelter?" asked Wrencher.

   "Right in front of you! Ta-da!" he exclaimed, standing up on his hind legs and using his fore legs to fanfare the shed.

   The shelter was a small, 5x5 shack made out of two different types of wood. The inside was cramped and dark, as he had no access to coal to make torches.

   "Look, I know it's not much. Actually, it's barely anything. But, we have shelter for tonight. And honestly, as awkwardly confined as it is in there, I'd rather be semi-safe in there then exposed out here. So, allons-y. Entrez, vous. Faites comme chez vous." he said.

   Rocket was a very self-concious colt. He was always pointing out his own mistakes and shortcomings and criticizing himself for them.

   They all packed inside like sardines in a tin.

   "How are we supposed to sleep like this? How are we supposed to do ANYTHING like this?" critiqued Wrencher.

   "I suggest a buddy system. One group gets one corner and another gets a different corner, and so on. I've got Blueberry. The rest of you pick partners!" answered Rocket.

   Wrencher looked flirtatiously at Reeses, who was happy to reply with a grimace and a quiet groan in disgust. Masks and Silent Sunshine took to another corner. There were only two corners left and three ponies to fill them. Clockwork quickly grabbed Reeses and dragged her into the third corner.

   "I'm doing you a favor. Trust me." she whispered. Reeses nodded.

   "S'cool. I like sleeping alone." said Wrencher to Reeses dissappointedly.

   "Sorry, buddy. You want me to sleep with you?" asked Rocket sincerely.

   "Nah. I don't go that way." He turned over and went to sleep.

   Rocket kissed Blueberry Spice gingerly and they slept in each other's arms. Silent Sunshine nuzzled Sato's chest like a pillow, to which he didn't mind much. Clockwork looked at Reeses.

   "Go ahead. My lips are waiting." she said jokingly. Reeses simply laid down next to her.

   Morning greeted them with sore backs and the putrid smell of burning, rotten flesh.

   "Good morning to us." said Rocket sarcastically.

Vagabond/Hope On The Horizon

   Years in the future, but not many, a wayward vagabond scours the lifeless desert landscape for anything at all. She had been out in the wilderness without food for three days. She hadn't seen a single sign of life since...er... she doesn't exactly remember what happened. All she knows is that SOMETHING happened and it wiped out all signs of life on this planet. The sun beat down on the barren wasteland. She wore tatters of armor made of what used to be leather. She is wrapped in the leather shreds like a mummy. They cover her face from the persistent sandstorms of this region. Her hooves are bare and ragged. She hadn't any leather to cover every inch of her body, so her hooves and tail were in shambles.

   "OW!" she shouted. She hadn't actually heard her own voice before, because with nopony to talk to, there's no reason to waste one's breath. A sharp pain had overtaken her left forehoof. She took a gander at what was causing her discomfort. A sharp piece of glass pertruded out of her hoof. Blood covered the opaque, inanimate wrongdoer. She slowly pulled out the offender, moaning in pain. She hadn't felt pain before. She hadn't seen blood before. This entire scenario turned out to be a conglomeration of neoteric discoveries for the young vagabond. She looked up from her wound to see what looked to be the wooden foundation to a house. Then she eyed another, this one with what used to be walls, but are now piles of rubble. But, she saw an even bigger foundation. One that could have held a myriad of ponies. It was more than a foundation, though. It was still standing! She hastily entered before night fell.

   "My spine is twisted in knots that only Colt Scouts know." said Wrencher, twisting and turning in an attempt to crack his back. Outside was fresh and spacious, unlike the dark captivity that was Rocket's problematic shed.

   "Apologies for the shoddy night in a shoddy shed, guys. But it really was the best I could do under the circumstances placed before me." Rocket said humbly.

   "Oh, it's fine. My back didn't need to feel like it wasn't a pretzel last night, anyway." said Reeses, her sentence drenched in biting sarcasm.

   "Je regrette, 'Madame Voltaire'." he responded sharply. For those who are unaware, the sentence translated from French means "I'm sorry, Mrs. Voltaire." Voltaire was a French thinker who criticized France's government with ample wit. Rocket had studied humans and anthropology almost as much as Lyra has. He can speak three ancient human languages quite fluently, and often uses them to his advantage in the arts of both love, and war.

   "What?" she questioned.

   "Nothing. Sorry I snapped at you like that." he replied solemnly.

   "Now what should we do?" asked Masks.

   "Adventure?" suggested Silent Sunshine.

   "If we are going to do that, we will need to prepare first. Get food and tools. Weapons. We all saw what the night brought. We could have died! We need to do battle to survive!" said Rocket. He was right.

   "He's right." agreed Blueberry Spice.

   "I'll make a table to craft things on. You guys get supplies. Wood. I need wood." Rocket advised

   Wrencher giggled at Rocket's inadvertent innuendo. He recieved a sharp glare in return from the blue pegasus.

   "We'll get you some wood. Let's go, guys!" said Reeses.

   Minutes pass and the group is back with the wood. Rocket made a crafting table outfitted with all crafting tools, including a small mallet and some pliers. He took the wood from them and quickly made a reliable wooden sword for all of them including him.

   "How do you hold one of these things?" asked Clockwork. Her spasms were making it a chore to hold the weapon in her hooves.

   They went outside to adventure as Silent Sunshine had initially suggested.

   Hours go by. They had been out adventuring for hours and had found absolutely nothing. The sun was starting to set.

   "Finally! Some real practice! COME ON, YOU UNDEAD FREAKS OF NATURE!" yelled Wrencher.

   "No way! We're going back home!" argued Silent Sunshine.

   "Home is miles away. There's no way we'd make it there before we got a bit of action." he rebuttled.

   "Both of you shut up! Why don't we just go there?" said Reeses, pointing to what seemed to be a small community. But this can't be possible! This planet is uninhabited by intelligent creatures! Yet there it stood. A small village that was a quarter of the size of Ponyville. It consisted of a few small villas and one large bulding in the center. It could hold a myriad of ponies. They hastily entered before night fell.