It was a dreary morning for the denizens of Ponyville, who had to wake to such a dismal sight after being put through yet another large rain storm due to one nameless (Rainbow Dash) pony's inability to get her paperwork in proper order and remember to schedule light showers over the small village to accommodate the many newly grown spring flowers sprouting up throughout town. All one could see in the normally bright and colorful town was dripping rooftops and large puddles pocketing the roads, a nuisance in of itself seeing as how if one wasn't sidestepping deep puddles they were jumping in surprise every time an ice-cold water droplet rolled down their spine.
It seemed everypony in Ponyville was having a hard time finding a silver lining in this moment, what with dark clouds still hovering high above their heads, almost threateningly, as if daring anypony to make a complaint so they could open up once again and drench the town like before. Yes, nopony was in a good mood this dark and depressing morning.
"Hi Derpy! Nice morning, huh?"
Except Pinkie Pie. Pinkie Pie was the only one who found this particular morning nice.
"Hello Pinkie! It is a nice morning, isn't it? I like how the rain made puddles, they're so fun to jump in! Did you bring my muffins?"
Okay, Derpy liked this particular morning too. This particular morning had no apparent effect on these two particular ponies, who chose to look on the bright side of this particular bad day. Is particular starting to sound weird yet? I heard if you say a word three times it loses meaning.
"Really? That sounds like fun! I wanna try! Spaghettispaghettispaghettispaghettispaghettispaghetti!" Pinkie Pie giggled. "Hey, that does sound weird!"
As Derpy looked on confusedly at the bright Pink pony whose fourth wall breaking prowess continued to confound her, there was one other inhabitant of Ponyville who found this morning grand, one other pony whose face lit up in a big smile upon seeing the water downed sight of the usually cheery town. One who used his morning time wisely instead of grumbling and complaining about the terrible conditions of this morning. A pony who decided that instead of letting it bring his mood down, he would do the opposite, as he usually did, and by do the opposite, he meant trying to heighten the spirits of everypony within earshot using a good dose of mischief mixed with questionable antics that bordered on criminal.
Derpy's question to Pinkie Pie regarding her seemingly one-sided conversation with a nearby flower pot was interrupted when she heard a loud smash followed by a shout of anger and a maniacal laugh. She turned just in time to see a white blur and a red streak fly over her head, snatching a red and yellow cupcake out of Pinkie's hoof she had evidently brought with her for just the occasion. As soon as the pastry left her hoof she waved at the retreating form of the laughing stallion, calling out "I'll just add that to your tab! Have a nice day!"
It just went to show that no matter how depressing it got all it took to lighten the mood was a bit of excitement. Whether or not that excitement was due to a daring public display of vandalism was up to the imagination, and the imagination of this particular pony was definitely not rated for those under the age of 18.
"Spaghetti! Spaghettispaghettispaghettispaghettispaghetti…" Pinkie Pie began dancing as she chanted, drawing a crowd to the odd spectacle as they all tried in vain to decipher the reasons behind the erratic behavior of the pink mare.
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The stallion that was seen not moments ago fleeing the scene of the crime (which he would insist was a work of art) was now hiding behind a house nearest to the expanse of fruit laden trees known as Sweet Apple Acres, breathing heavily and smiling ear to ear. He had been planning this little outing for a while now, waiting for an opportunity when the usual security guards around Town Hall were either gone or otherwise incapacitated. Which is why when he woke up this morning and saw that the town was soaked and basically void of life, he took it as a sign he should take this chance to do a little public service. Everypony knew the Mayor was cutting budget around town, the schoolhouse didn't even have enough funds to fix the roof correctly, which is why the students got a day off today on account of freak flooding in the building. Since the damp conditions of the town had driven security inside, he decided it was time to initiate political protocol "ALPHA-TWO-NINER".
Or in other words plan "Paint something on Town Hall that will make the Mayor look bad". See why he had gone with the former? It sounds cooler.
Anyway, he had just gotten done with his latest masterpiece, a painting he claimed to depict an outcry directed at the political injustices the residents had been subjected to thanks to Mayor Mare and her ineffectiveness at budgeting the towns currency and resources in a way to better the lives of all who live there instead of hoarding it all away for unknown yet suspected selfish reasons, although others would argue it was simply a crude representation of the Mayor as Mayor McCheese holding a sign that read "All 'donations' around back". One of the security guards chose the moment he finished to come around the corner on a fast-food run and see the artist at work atop a tall ladder, paint brush in mouth and an "I just got caught" look on his face.
And so now here he was, hiding behind a house, panting like a dog and attempting to hold his laughter in so as to avoid being overheard. And who was this pony? This self-appointed voice of the speechless? The one pony that dared stand out against a government intent on forcing the land and all its subjects to its stomach in order to command total obedience? This pony, who was ahead of his time, was a local mischief maker that went only by "Streek"; spelled purposefully with two E's so as to avoid conformity. He was a white Earth pony with a yellow and red mane and tail, his tail being styled into spikes to better help with his speed. He wore a grey vest, and had long strips of red cloth wrapped around his fore hooves. And to top this strange apparel off, around his neck was his signature scarf, made from the same material the wrappings on his front legs were. Anypony who knew him would agree that they had never seen him without this scarf. He always wore it, no matter what the occasion.
His Cutie Mark was one that was even stranger then his choice of clothing. It was of something that nopony had ever seen, and one that made Lyra Heartstrings extremely envious: a hand. An actual, honest to Celestia human hand print that looked as if an actual living human had dipped their beautifully majestic multi-purpose appendage in red paint and slapped him ceremoniously on the flank. At least that was how Lyra poetically put it. Above the hand print was a thick red line that resembled a curving brush stroke. What did it stand for, you may ask? He believed it stood for the hand of justice, a symbol of his status as "liberator". Whatever he is trying to liberate is beyond anyone, but a special talent isn't something to shake a metaphorical fist at. Even if that talent included vandalizing every inch of a town he claimed to be helping, you still had to admit he was pretty good at it.
As he hid behind the house while catching his breath, Streek gave himself a mental high five for a job well done, peeling the paper from around his morning cupcake to take a bite. "Nothing like a good 'ol dose of sugar to help ya through the morning." He said to himself.
"Is that a pickup line or are ya just talkin' to that cupcake?"
Streek looked to where the voice came from and saw a familiar freckled face. "Applejack, if it were a line, I couldn't use it on you even if I wanted to. Besides, it's not a very good one anyway. Definitely not one of my best."
"Noted. Now why can't ya use a line on me? An' just what do ya mean by 'even if ya wanted to'?" The orange mare narrowed her eyes at him.
Streek shrugged. "Someone already called dibs. Gotta respect the bro-code." He stuffed the rest of the cupcake in his mouth and swallowed it, licking his lips in satisfaction.
Applejack raised an eyebrow. "Dibs? Bro-code? What in the name of Celestia are ya talkin' 'bout there, Streek?"
He threw a leg over her shoulders. "If I told ya, you'd probably just end up slapping me."
She rolled her eyes. "I feel like doin' that anyway. Now get yer hoof offa me 'fore ah buck that cupcake outta ya."
Streek took a step away from her. "Okay, okay. Believe it or not, I've actually learned to take your word when you make a threat." He gulped. "Especially after you told me that if I ever took your hat you'd throw me in the bull ring."
"It wouldn't have gored ya like that if ya woulda just taken off that silly scarf of yers."
"Hey! Don't mock the scarf!" He grabbed the neckwear and hugged it to his chest. "It was given to me by a mysterious unicorn who blessed it with magical properties to allow me the ability to see into the future." He finished ominously.
Applejack's eyes widened. "Really?"
"Nope. It's just a red scarf I got a really long time ago. But it is freakin' sweet!" He flashed her a goofy grin. When he only received a dull look in response, he persisted until Applejack finally cracked a smile. "Yes! You smiled, I'm off the hook!" Streek cheered loudly.
"Hey, did you hear that? It sounded like that punk who vandalized Town Hall! Go get the others; I'll make sure he doesn't get away again!"
Crap. Just crap. He had completely forgotten he was still on the run. He began panicking. And when he panics, he always does the same thing.
He cast a pleading look at the farmer, putting on his best puppy dog face, silently begging her to hide him until they gave up like usual. Applejack resisted at first, but ultimately gave in with a curt nod and an exasperated sigh when Streek wrapped her in a crushing hug and took off towards the barn in Sweet Apple Acres.
The orange mare watched him go, admiring his speed and noting he was definitely in the running for fastest Earth pony in Ponyville. She understood why Rainbow Dash was always butting heads with the strange stallion, if he were a pegasus that dream of becoming a Wonderbolt would be even farther from her grasp.
Applejack adjusted her Stetson since it had gotten crooked after Streek's hug, smiling to herself once it was straight, before heading off after the white colt, already regretting the decision to hide him out again.
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"Fer the last time, I aint got no idea where the little varmint went! Why dontcha do yer job an' look fer him somewhere else!" Applejack glared daggers at the blue colt cowering in front of her, his pupils constricted to tiny pin pricks as he shivered in fear. He was one of the security guards that was chasing Streek down for his latest prank, and apparently he had gotten wind of the graffiti artist hiding out at Sweet Apple Acres. Unfortunately for him Applejack was nopony to go back on her word, and since she had promised Streek, for the eighteenth time (that month), that she would keep his whereabouts (inside a barrel not 15 ft. from where she was currently standing) a secret, she was left to her own devices to convince this pony he wasn't there. And since she was a terrible liar under any other pretense, scaring the wits out of him was the only way for her to lie without being obvious.
"B-b-but M-miss Applejack…I h-have witness reports claiming they s-saw Streek head off in th-this direction…s-so you see why I would have reason to suspect he'd be here-"
"Are you sayin' ahm a liar!?"
"W-what!? N-no! Not at all! I was just-"
"Ya'll best watch yer tone there, mister, and choose yer next few words carefully, or else ahm gonna buck ya'll into next Thursday!" Applejack was nose to nose with the colt at this point, giving him a glare strong enough to match Fluttershy's "stare".
The colt opened his mouth to reply, then immediately turned and took off at top speed, running for what he thought was his life, unaware that Applejack wouldn't have done any of what she said she would. Aren't hollow threats just fantastic?
When she was sure the colt was gone, she slowly walked over to the barrel Streek was hiding in, placed her hoof on the side, and gave it a shove. The barrel toppled over and Streek came rolling out, his hind hooves hanging in the air above his head for a moment before they fell back down, leaving him lying on his stomach in the dirt.
"Thanks AJ, you're a real pal." He said sarcastically.
Applejack laughed. "Well ah sure as hay didn't do that fer free. You owe me now, Mr. Troublemaker."
Streek shot to her side, putting his hoof under her chin while giving her his best bedroom eyes. "My lovely dove; thy need not be so coy. Thou had me at 'hello'." He started leaning in closer to her, but was stopped when she put her hoof over his mouth and pushed him away.
"Whoa there lover boy, ya'll know that aint what ah meant." She blushed. "Not to say ah aint flattered, but ah see ya 'round here almost as much as Big Mac. It'd just be weird. Ya'll understand, right?"
Streek grinned. "Come on AJ, you know you're my girl. Maybe not in that sense, but I care about you just the same. I was just joking around anyway. I already told you I couldn't even if I wanted to."
"Yeah…about that…ahm gonna need ya to…not bring that up 'round me. It's startin' to give me a bad feelin'."
"No problem. So, if I can't repay your help in that way, how else am I supposed to pay you back? I don't like leaving loose ends. I've learned my lesson."
"Well ya'll can start by-" She stopped suddenly and gave him a weird look. "…ahem…as ah was sayin'…ya'll can start by convincin' that friend of yers to come over an' fix our cider press. The season is comin' up again and Rainbow Dash already made me promise ahd sneak some cider aside fer her later so she wouldn't miss out again."
Streek smirked knowingly. "Oh, I don't think I'll have too much of a problem convincing Steam to help out. But…maybe if I got a kiss for good luck…?" He turned his head and waggled his eyebrows.
"Sure ya can!" Streek smiled widely. Applejack brought her hoof up to her lips and blew an ear shattering whistle. "Winona! C'mere girl!" The ever faithful Border collie came running full speed from the house, coming to a stop at Applejack's feet, tail wagging and feet splayed out so she'd be ready to fetch any ball thrown in any direction. "Give 'im a kiss, Winona! Someone needs some lovin'!" She pointed at Streek to indicate who she meant. Winona cocked her head to the side, regarding him for a moment before crouching down low, preparing for a chase.
Streek backed up slowly. "No…no no…no, there's no need for that…down girl…easy now…" With a bark she was off, hot on Streek's heels as he ran for his life. "No! Please no!" He barely made it to the tree line before he felt the dog jump on his back, the extra weight throwing off his balance and making him fall to the ground. He rolled over onto his back and was immediately assaulted by saliva as the dog began licking his face.
Applejack walked over, laughing the whole time. "Hope that's enough luck fer ya'll, Streek! If it's not ah could always send Winona over to ya anytime!"
He groaned. "That sounds just wonderful, AJ."
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Streek had to be careful on his way back from Sweet Apple Acres. Even though Applejack had done a great job convincing that guard he wasn't hiding there, that didn't mean they hadn't stopped looking for him in the rest of Ponyville. Since the streets were too dangerous for him to travel on without getting caught, he took the only other option left.
"Found him."
"Yep, that's him alright."
"That's the worst disguise I've ever seen."
Okay, so maybe disguising himself as Hoity Toity wasn't a very good idea.
So Streek found himself running from the security guards once again, tearing up half of Ponyville in his mad dash from the law. Well, security law, which technically isn't law at all. Thank Celestia for small town self-government.
"Wow, never thought I'd think that." He said out loud.
Losing these guys wasn't going to be easy. At this point they weren't just chasing him to do their job. He had tagged enough of each of their respective houses to know that this was personal. They were determined to catch him and force him to pay his whopping fine of 8 bits, which was 12 bits more then he actually owned. Also, he was never that good at math.
As made a turn onto the market street, he realized too late it was a bad move. All the way down the street, he saw more colts, all wearing the same little insignia the others were wearing on their chests. He turned to where he had just come from and saw the three that had been on his tail were now blocking his path, smiling menacingly at him. All around him the colts were closing in, leaving him with no way out.
"Oh what I wouldn't give to have wings right now."
Then that reminded him of who he was looking for in the first place, and suddenly he knew exactly how to get out of this. He put on his mischievous smirk and got ready to make a quick escape. The colts all jumped him at the same time, rolling to the ground in a big ball as each pony grabbed for a piece of Streek to hold him down. When the dust they kicked up during the fight settled, they all had a hold of a leg, head or tail. Unfortunately, the mare they were holding down looked nothing like Streek. In fact, she looked a lot more like Bon Bon. She even got the angry glare down just right.
"You guys are gonna have to try a bit harder than that to catch me!" Streek yelled from a nearby rooftop. All the guards let Bon Bon go and helped her up, one of them receiving a curt slap from the furious mare. When they looked up to where Streek had just been, they saw he was halfway down the block already, jumping from roof to roof like a pro. They took off in pursuit but quickly lost sight of him. Streek had, once again, evaded arrest.
The disheartened colts stamped their hoofs angrily, turned and walked away, unaware of a red strip of fabric slipping slowly down a chimney nearby.
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The inside of the house was like any other, except for one little difference: there was no furniture. None whatsoever. Nothing but bare floors and empty rooms. The reason for this was because the owner of said house claimed he didn't need any furniture. Which, in a way, was true. It's not like he spent his time in the living room anyway.
No, this was not the domicile of Streek. The resident of this house that Streek had just broken into was home to one of his closest friends: An eccentric inventor who spent most of his time in the basement crafting unbelievable or otherwise completely insane creations. This stallion wasn't very well known around Ponyville; he rarely came out to socialize. Basically, Streek was the only one who knew to check in on him every day to make sure he hadn't forgotten to eat.
His name was Steam Punk, a unicorn from Manehattan who, believe it or not, was actually the son of one of the ponies responsible for inventing the train that carries so many ponies around Equestria. As a filly, he was fascinated by anything mechanical; he took apart everything as a child: clocks, door mechanisms, sewing machines, light fixtures, etc. Basically anything with gears and wires that he could get his hooves on were made short work of to allow him to see how they ticked. He made a name for himself as a prodigy, and he hasn't let a day go by to let his talent be wasted. A blessing and a curse.
He was currently spending his morning in his basement, surrounded by brass and steel, all the inventions he was working on. He himself was at his work bench, head down and completely out cold. His grey coat looked scruffy, and his brown and copper colored mane was messy with tufts of hair sticking out in every direction. That was how Streek found him, making a tsk tsk noise as he came to the conclusion Steam had, once again, pulled an all-nighter working on some crazy idea.
Streek looked at him for a moment, pondering how he should go about waking him up. He had just decided to go with the usual of putting a balloon over the steam pipe when the inventor twitched, knocking over a beaker filled with some strange clear liquid onto the floor, which started fizzling and popping before turning purple and crawling away to squeeze through a crack in the floor. Streek stared wide-eyed at it, shaking his head to convince himself that didn't just happen. Steam groaned and raised his head off the table, running his hoof through his mane and straightening it out a bit. Multiple pops were heard as he stretched his back out, the product of sleeping in such an awkward position.
"Steam you're gonna kill yourself if you keep this up. When was the last time you even ate something?" Streek asked as he picked up a plate sitting on the bench, dumping the moldy sandwich on it into the trash.
"Wha…Streek? What are you doing back? Weren't you here like…five minutes ago?"
Streek looked at him dully. "That was yesterday my friend. It's been an entire day since I last saw you."
He looked confused for a second, like he wasn't able to wrap his head around that bit of knowledge. "…But…you said…you were going to get lunch…?"
"I did. And then six hours later I went and got dinner. And not ten minutes ago I got breakfast. You starting to see a pattern here, genius?"
He rubbed his eyes with his hooves, the pale orbs becoming more alert as the sleep slowly worked its way out of them. "Where are my goggles?"
"I think they're hanging on that lamp." Streek pointed to the lamp, where a pair of brass goggles with red lenses hung from. Steam reached over and pulled them off, pulling them over his head and letting the strap go so they snapped against his face. He took a moment to adjust them correctly so they fit better; the whole time Streek waiting for him so he could explain a few things. When Steam said nothing, he relented and finally asked "You're missing a few feathers there, buddy. Just what the hay were you doing?"
It wasn't metaphorical. The "feathers" he was missing were very much real. As an inventor, Steam Punk created many mechanical wonders, most of which didn't usually work out or turned out to be a complete failure, but that didn't stop him from trying continuously. One of these creations came from an inspiration he had while talking to Twilight Sparkle, the local librarian, who about a year ago told him of a spell she once cast on her friend to give her wings so she could go to Cloudsdale to watch the Best Young Flyers competition. The spell was so complicated she only cast it once, but it was enough to make Steam wonder what it would be like to have wings that didn't require magic. So he set about building his own pair of pegasus wings that would allow any pony, unicorn and Earth, the gift of flight.
And that's just where the problem started. Steam created the wings, yes, but he also made the mistake of testing them out on himself. After the very lengthy process of attaching the wings, which required he latch them together around his shoulders in a difficult and over complicated way, he attempted a test flight. You can imagine how well that went. Afterwards he told Streek that the problem was probably because of his failure to create operational blueprints so he could adjust them to need less manual control. It was so hard to manipulate the wings that even he couldn't muster up the multitasking ability necessary just to properly extend the wings out. After they got back to his lab, he realized he had made another mistake: a failure to install a release mechanism. Much to his chagrin and Streek's amusement, he not only was now stuck with a pair of wings he couldn't even use, he was also stuck with a pair of wings he couldn't even use or take off. So far he'd tried almost everything to get them off short of removing outer extremities, with no success.
Steam glared at his wings after Streek's question. "I was trying to remove these useless pieces of junk! I thought if I could take off a couple feathers I could maneuver a wrench into the inner housing and loosen it enough to slip the entire assembly off, but I couldn't get a grip on any of the bolts holding it together! I think they may have gotten stripped from the flexing action of the joints. It's like these things get harder and harder to remove every day I have them on!" He reached back and grabbed the left wing, pulling it out to its full extension in an attempt to rip it off with his bare hooves.
"Come on, bro. That's just embarrassing." Streek flinched when Steam brought the wing up to his mouth and bit down hard; pulling with all his might as if he could defeat a marvel of modern technology with his masticating muscles. "You're gonna break your teeth. And I'm not gonna be around when you tell Colgate what you were doing. After the hissy fit she threw last time when you chipped a tooth on a metal coil, I'm afraid she's gonna break out the toothpaste cannon and take us both out."
Steam let go with a sigh and let his head droop. "I'm going to be stuck with these worthless wastes of metal forever, aren't I?"
Streek threw a hoof over his shoulder. "If you had just let me test them out like I asked, you wouldn't be in this predicament. Plus, I'd have a majestic pair of metal wings to rub in Rainbow Dash's cocky little face!" He brought his hoof up in a competitive gesture. "She thinks she's so hot, just because she can fly! If I had wings I'd beat her in a heartbeat!"
"Streek, even I can't operate these things. What makes you think you could?"
"I'm just that awesome, my friend." A thought occurred to him then. "Oh yeah, I almost forgot. Applejack told me to ask-"
"Applejack!? You saw her? When? What did she say? Did she ask about me?" Steam's demeanor changed from glum to excited in an instant, his obvious crush on the farmer bleeding through his despair.
"Calm down now, yes she asked about you." Steam Punk hoof pumped. "I had to hide out at her place again since I got in some trouble this morning, and she wanted me to pay her back by asking you if you would fix their cider press."
"Is that it? Nothing else?" Steam stared at Streek suspiciously. "You did…nothing else while you were there?"
"What? No, of course not! She wouldn't let me-"
"Wouldn't let you do what!? Did you hit on her again?"
"No! Yes, but she turned me down!" Steam glared at him. "Trust me, I got more action from the dog then I did from her." He finished dully. "Besides, you know I wouldn't disrespect the bro-code like that."
Steam looked horrified. "Oh sweet Celestia, please don't tell me you told her about that "bro-code" nonsense! You didn't tell her I have dibs, did you? I never actually said that you know! You said that for me!"
"Relax, I didn't tell her you have dibs." He looked relieved at that. "I just told her somebody has dibs, I didn't name anyone specific."
"I could punch you right now. I really could."
"Now now, there's no need for violence. The thing you should be focusing on right now is the fact that you get some alone time with the future Mrs. Steam Punk!"
"Oh please don't start humming again-"
"Too late!" Streek began humming the tune of "Here comes the bride" while sashaying around the room, tying his scarf around his neck like a bowtie and mimicking a groom at a wedding.
"Why am I friends with you?"
"Because you love me."
"I really don't."
"You can lie to me all you want buddy, but you can't lie to yourself." Streek gave him a cheeky smile. Steam tried to resist, but eventually he cracked a grin himself. Streek cheered. "Yes, you smiled! I'm two for two!"
Steam relented and started laughing. "You're kind of an ass, you know that?"
"I am in no way related to donkeys!"
"You could have fooled me."
The two shared a laugh, changing their topic of conversation to one of what Steam Punk was working on next, and at about noon Streek managed to convince his friend to go out to get some lunch since he was tired of being cooped up inside for so long. After that, they headed off to Sweet Apple Acres, carefully of course since Streek was still in trouble for his earlier actions, and Steam proceeded to fix Applejacks cider press while simultaneously watching her apple bucking technique, so enraptured he was that he ended up pinching his hooves in the gears a few times. At one point Rainbow Dash stopped by and Applejack and Big Mac literally had to pull her and Streek away from each other when they got into an argument about who was truly faster. The day wore down in that manner, by the time the sun was going down Steam Punk had finished his repairs and Applejack was so grateful she even gave him a kiss on the cheek. After he woke up fifteen minutes later, she offered the two an invitation to a picnic out in the fields.
What started out as such a gloomy, rain soaked morning turned into a nice day filled with excitement and fun, exactly what doctor Streek ordered. Sometimes all it took to make a bad day good was friends. Isn't that what the whole point of it all was in the end? What was that old saying?
Friendship is Magic.
